#until he realizes Big Eddie is ALSO a repressed gay

[myundeadgayson]

looking forward to the eventual resurgence of Stranger Things/IT fanfics where Eddie K. starts getting called “Lil Eddie” and “Eddie Jr” so the party doesn’t get confused.

#stranger things #stranger things 4 #it book #it movie #stranger things crossover #i can’t express how much i love those crossovers and the silly things in them like that #looking forward to the eddie and eddie interactions #eddie k is totally gonna think eddie is out to kill them #and probably a demonspawn #until he realizes Big Eddie is ALSO a repressed gay #love that for them #if i don’t see Robin adopting Richie in almost all of these i will CRY #speaking of. i hope this time we don’t get Mike and Richie as Twins or Cousins but just two dudes that look TOO SIMILIAR #and it makes no sense and confused literally everyone #half the characters are conviced it’s just Richie or Mike pulling a prank #but they literally don’t even know each other #i crave chaos

[wanderingwomanwondering]

704 includes several mentions of The Fight, the big unification bout in Vegas, and Muay Thai sparring. I don’t think that’s just for the dudebro vibes (tho that’s definitely a factor this season). When it comes to Eddie’s journey as presented in that epic episode, I think all the full-contact combat/sports references are doing subtextual work to narrate Eddie’s queerness and where he’s at this season.

Eddie doesn’t really consciously engage with his queerness at this point in the story but via Tommy as his mirror and all the sports references, I think it’s safe to say that Eddie is at odds with his queerness but he doesn’t fully realize that’s what it is and/or that it’s something he’s been battling on some level his whole life. A few things in the ep point in that direction:

Buck: How was the fight?

Eddie: Fight was okay. Seats were amazing. Tommy’s buddies with the promoter, so we were ringside. Felt like I was the one throwing the punches.

The sense I get is that Eddie is witnessing a fight inside himself but he’s not aware that he’s an active participant in said fight. That makes sense to me given his tremendous ability to compartmentalize and ‘be in control’. Like. The fight is happening but he has it walled off and isn’t consciously connected to it. His queerness is present and with him (aka Tommy with him at the fight + “watching half naked men pummel each other”) but he doesn’t recognize it for what it is quite yet.

A unification bout, according to Wikipedia because I know *nothing* about sports, is the bringing together of titles held by different fighters. Eddie going to the fight with Tommy seems to me like Eddie needing to discover an aspect of himself that Tommy that he has in common with him!

Then there’s all the Muay Thai references. Eddie says it’s been a long time since he met someone that can go toe to toe with him when sparring. Eddie’s fighting for his life against his queerness y’all. It’s not an actual match which is good but still I think the point stands. He’s at odds with a part of himself that’s trying to emerge victorious and express itself. But between Catholic guilt, family expectations, the hypermasculine culture of the military, and overall heteronormative comphet culture Eddie hasn’t been able to see/engage/accept his queerness.

I think this all feeds into to the scene where Buck comes out in 705 and Eddie expresses surprise about Tommy being gay but not Buck being bisexual. Buck has always worn his heart on his sleeve so it makes sense that when he figured out his bisexuality he would share that part of himself with others. Eddie is King of Repression, Reservation, and Control so it makes sense that he wouldn’t quite know HOW to do that for himself yet. Tommy’s character is a needed mirror for Eddie to see what’s possible for himself (all of himself) whereas Tommy was a needed vehicle for the actual expression of Buck’s queerness at this moment in the story. Tommy is doing so much friggin work in the narrative lol!

Lastly, I think Eddie’s own queerness is still a mystery to him and something that he’s sparring with on some level because he’s NOT allosexual! Now’s a good time for me to say loudly that I’m on Team Demisexual/Demiromantic Eddie. It fits with the data we have about his character and it’s still subject to the heteronormativity and comphet we’ve all seen affecting Eddie.

Eddie has expressed little interest in anyone of any gender who he hasn’t had a baby with, viewed as a mother-figure to Chris, or expected the universe to hand-deliver as if by magic. He has not intrinsic motivation toward sexual or romantic relationships until/unless he has a meaningful emotional connection to the person. He described himself as a nester and so far the only person we’ve actually seen him nest with in canon is Buck!!

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that season 7 has shown Buck and Eddie coparenting Chris and sharing their feelings with each other. It’s also meaningful that Eddie, Buck, and Tommy are all talking about Chris at various points and in various ways. Plus Buck thought he had to fight Tommy for Chris’ affection (and Tommy eventually tells Buck that’s not true). Chris has narratively been a metaphor for Eddie’s heart many times before. Buck is the one in the nest holding Eddie’s heart and both Buck and Eddie are gonna figure that out. They gotta or imma start throwin’ stuff!!

Anyway this meta got a little longer than I initially thought it would but I had to get this outta my head.

TLDR: Tommy’s epic mirror status for Eddie runs deep and so does his role as catalyst for both Buck and Eddie. He’s a bridge to Buddie *fingers crossed* Basically Eddie’s in the fight of his life trying to sort out his wants, needs, and identity when it comes to intimate relationships. Buck’s a little ahead of Eddie in the process but Eddie’s on his way!

(P.S. Buck is bi and I will die on the Eddie is demi hill. I’ll accept repressed gay Eddie with open arms but honestly I think demi fits what we’ve seen for Eddie way better.)

#eddie diaz #tommy kinard #911 meta #buddie #911 abc

[conflictofthemind]

I don’t know how to break this to you guys, but Byler as an official couple is not going to be happening in the first half of the season and it probably won’t even officially be a thing until the finale. Because of Mike’s issues. And it being the 80s.

Will has actually… been a fairly easy character to figure out. And for as much as he does still absolutely repress his sexuality, he is way further on the path to living authentically than Mike is. We all agree on this, right? Will is used to being labelled as a freak regardless of what he does or doesn’t do. He never really tried to feign interest in girls. Most of the town already suspects he might be gay, and while it would get worse for him if the rumours were known to be truthful, he knows he has the support of Jonathan. And I think he knows deep down that he has the support of Mike (and Joyce). Otherwise, why tell him that he makes him feel better for being ‘different’ (gay)?

But Mike? ‘Just trying to be normal’ Michael Wheeler? We know he didn’t mean that as in school; he prides himself as a nerd. Michael Wheeler who seemed like he could have been on the precipice of finally breaking it off with El, and then tried to go back even harder after Will’s push? And for the general audience to make sense of what they will perceive as a sudden shift in Mike’s character when they reveal his feelings for Will, they’ll have to hammer it in that Mike is afraid to his core of being out for them to make sense of his previous actions.

Mike has a different personal life than Will. Reagan supporter conservative parents who don’t like to speak about emotions. He doesn’t have as strong of a relationship with Nancy. We know Hellfire and Eddie’s death will have big consequences on the narrative, and that the town will continue the witch hunt against all of the members of Hellfire. They list sodomy as one of its demonic influences. Will is also going back to high-school, and it’s possible he has a bruise on his face in that Episode 4 farm scene. He’s been bullied before, and I don’t see how they don’t bring that up again, and worse.

If Mike is out, or gets outed, he will fall from a much higher place into a much deeper pit than Will. I honestly foresee them both realizing eachothers’ feelings by the middle of the season, maybe acting on them in private, but Mike suddenly pushes him away in public when Will tries to initiate any contact or closeness - even nothing overtly romantic.

Will is ready to start being more open about their relationship to family and friends as he’s sick of hiding himself and has probably, at this point, come out to Joyce at the least and met Robin. Mike is not so ready. This creates a conflict leading up to the finale where Mike truly has to choose between living in the closet for the rest of his life, and losing Will, versus the bravery to be open (to friends/ family) at the risk of being rejected or further outed and kicked out / assaulted / etc.

#byler #mike wheeler #will byers #byler analysis #Mike wheeler analysis #stranger things #just had to get this off my chest

[coldbam]

i keep turning over the 705 eddie storyline in my head bc i've seen it called out of character, people being really disappointed with it etc etc but idk it really worked for me

every reationship we have seen with eddie he has jumped into without really considering it, thsi happened with shannon when she came back in s2 and they jumped into bed and they didnt have a WHAT ARE WE talk until 217, and then again ready to JUMP IN as soon as there was maybe another baby coming (which.... really answered the "am i just christopher's mother to you" question, woof). famously it happened with ana, he introduced her to his kid and integrated her into his life so soon while saying meeting her family isn't a big deal, and getting freaked out when he looked up and realized it was all very serious actually. ALSO, he was ready to STAY WITH ANA, and push through it until his talk with buck.

and now this season started with him proclaiming proudly "i'm a nester, i nest!" and telling bobby he loved being married*

idk, i think it works with the idea of him doing what he think he's supposed to rather than considering what he actually wants. "i've been with this woman for a few months now, time to take the next step," without like considering his actual feelings about her. and him taking that step back with marisol IS a step forward for him even if it feels silly to watch it happen when the relationship likely still will not last (bc he's gay....... eddie coming out arc s8 please god. did not even get into the repressed catholic stuff here but, goodness!!! yes that'll do)

*idk i think loved bering MARRIED to her rather than loved her is so skdljskdf its so... its such an interesting way to phrase this. especially when seemignly he was faithful to her during the 2-3 years she had left him, idk this man loved Being Married even when it was not a good relationship)

#is any of this anything??? no im just talking to myself i love to think about eddie...

[outrunningthedark]

I know you say wait until canon tells us that Eddie’s parents are homophobic before we assume that they are. And normally I would agree because we actually haven’t seen that in canon yet. But if they aren’t homophobic then why would Eddie be so repressed about his sexuality? You know what I mean? If his parents didn’t make him feel guilty or ashamed of being bi/gay, even with comments about other people, then why is he so repressed that he’s just now realizing he’s not straight in his 30s? I would assume that guilt and being ashamed had to start pretty young

Okay, but where would his parents have developed these homophobic opinions if headcanons insist Ramon’s other family members would actually support Eddie? We don’t know a damn thing about Helena’s side so I can’t point any fingers at her.

Maybe growing up in Texas might have done it? Classmates and friends making remarks that stuck with him?

Maybe his parents never actually said anything about gay people so Eddie wasn’t aware it wouldn’t be a big deal?

Maybe being in the Army caused him to repress those feelings even more?

Maybe Eddie interpreted Ramon’s criticism in a way that made him think being with another man was unacceptable?

I’m not gonna sit here and say his parents definitely won’t have an issue with it because there’s always the chance the show wants to tackle what it like when you’re not accepted, but I’m also not going to single out two people we’ve seen a grand total of three times - twice in one episode - just because everyone else is doing it.

#anonymous #tina speaks #tv: 911 #tv: 9-1-1 #eddie diaz

[rchtoziers]

a kiss discretely, reddie ❤️

13. [a kiss] discreetly. (from this list)

ANYTHING FOR YOU MY LOVE XOXO

*waves a magic wand* eddie and also stan survived and they kicked the fuck out of the clown and won because uh *spins wheel* i said so

also uh this got way out of hand before we even got to the kiss major whoops on my part ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

*

Listen, Eddie’s a risk analyst, so he understands when something is a bad fucking idea.

He knows the facts: he quite literally just finalized his divorce, he’s still in physical therapy and has a long way to go, he’s got a whole childhood’s worth of repressed memories that he now needs to work out in therapy, and up until three months ago he wasn’t even able to think about standing up without crying.

So, logically, he knows he should probably deal with one or two or all of those things before he starts a new relationship. Logically.

Logic goes out the fucking window, though, the second Eddie looked up one day at Richie and realized he’d been in love with him ever since they were kids.

Really, his only probable next step was to grab a fistful of Richie’s shirt and tug him down into a kiss they’d both been waiting for forever.

Lucky for Eddie, Richie is really easy to persuade after one or two or a hundred kisses, which is why it takes approximately two seconds after Eddie timidly asks, “Is it okay if we don’t tell anyone about this just yet? Just for a little bit?” for Richie to nod and sag his shoulders in relief as he ducks down to kiss Eddie again and again.

If Eddie’s being completely honest, he’s shocked they’ve managed to keep it a secret for so long.

Things just keep coming up.

Stan and Patty announce that they’re finally gonna have a baby, and what are Richie and Eddie supposed to do, steal their thunder? Then Bill announces his own divorce and really, it doesn’t come as a surprise, but Richie and Eddie certainly can’t rub their happiness in his face, it would be rude. They’ve finally reached a quiet point, about a month into… whatever this is when all their friends have stopped having big news, but the day they decide to text the group chat is the literal exact same day that Bev and Ben announce they’re getting married over the weekend and everyone is expected to be in attendance.

And Eddie is happy for his friends, genuinely, he’s not that big of an asshole, but the whole thing is really inconvenient for him and it honestly just gets worse when he catches sight of Richie in his best man’s tux. Eddie can’t exactly jump Richie at the wedding, so, again. Inconvenient.

Richie’s delighted laughter when Eddie flushes red at the sight of him then turns on his heel to leave the room will echo in Eddie’s ears for many years to come, however, and it almost makes it worth it.

“Dance with me,” Richie murmurs against the shell of Eddie’s ear, a few songs after Beverly and Ben’s first dance, when everyone else is on the dance floor and no one is sparing them a second glance.

“That’s not exactly discreet, Rich,” Eddie reminds him.

But Richie just laughs and twines his fingers with Eddie’s to tug him forward. “Everyone else is dancing, it would look weird if we didn’t join,” Richie says. “Plus it’s an upbeat song, so. Logistically speaking, we’re fine.”

Eddie can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of him. “You’re not using that word right.”

“Ooh, please teach me more about logistics, Eds, it really gets me going,” Richie croons. He spins Eddie around dramatically when they both make it onto the dance floor, ridiculous and charming as ever.

“I hate you,” Eddie sighs, but it doesn’t take much convincing to get him to move across the floor with Richie in exceedingly ridiculous ways. He’s sure his feelings are written clearly across his face for anyone to see, but for once Eddie doesn’t really care.

The song changes to a slow one, and before Eddie can even really understand it, Richie is wrapping his arms around Eddie’s waist and turning him slowly. It’s only natural for Eddie’s hands to fall onto Richie’s shoulders, even with those infuriating four inches of height that Richie’s got on him.

He raises an eyebrow when Richie catches his gaze.

“Bev and Ben haven’t looked away from one another, like, at all tonight,” Richie murmurs. “No one is gonna be looking at us.”

Eddie ducks his face into Richie’s neck to hide his grin. It strikes him right below his chest, sometimes, how romantic Richie can be without even trying. He thinks he could live in this moment forever and they’d both be just fine.

“You know, a lot of relationships start at weddings,” Eddie says conversationally. “Wouldn’t be much of a stretch for our friends to assume this is when we got together.”

He can feel the rumble of Richie’s laughter from where they’re pressed chest to chest. “Edward Kaspbrak, are you suggesting that we lie to our friends and tell them that this was the night I finally convinced you to be my boyfriend? Has the last month meant nothing to you?”

Eddie’s certain his grin would be enough to light up this whole venue if the power were to go out right now. He raises his head and looks Richie in the eye. “Boyfriend?” he repeats.

“What are you, twelve?” Richie asks. “Are we not dating?”

Eddie thinks he’s happy enough that he could burst into flames right now, everyone else be damned. “You’ve never called me that before, god forbid if I’m a little excited to hear it. Jesus Christ.”

“What do you want me to call you?” Richie asks, and his laughter is bubbly and bright when Eddie groans. “No, seriously, what else would I call you? My lover? The stars in my sky? My fiancé? My angel of the morning? I could pull a Stanley and call you my babylove.”

“Fiancé?” Eddie repeats, incredulous. “We’ve been together for a month, Richie.”

“I believe it’s called u-hauling in the gay community, Eduardo, learn your terminology.”

“I hate you,” Eddie sighs.

Richie lifts a hand and brushes his thumb along Eddie’s jaw. “I love you,” he says seriously, like it’s not the first time he’s said it out loud to Eddie. Like he’s said it a thousand times before.

“Did you seriously just say that for the first time at our best friends’ wedding?” Eddie asks. “Are you serious right now? What happened to us not wanting to take the spotlight away from our friends, Richie! This is why we’ve kept our mouths shut for a month!”

“Yeesh, you don’t have to say it back, I just needed to get it off my chest, god damn.”

“Of course I love you,” Eddie tells him. “I’ve been in love with you for eons. I wouldn’t have kissed you a month ago if I wasn’t so in love with you I thought I was gonna stop breathing if I didn’t kiss you. You’re it for me, asshole. Past, present, and future. Of course I love you.”

“Of course,” Richie repeats. His voice is faint; he looks a little shell-shocked.

Eddie softens. There’s a curl at the base of Richie’s neck that he tugs on affectionately. “I’m sorry if I ever did anything to make you think I didn’t love you so much it was eating me alive,” he says.

Richie laughs, startled. Bright. In love. Eddie wants to kiss him senseless. “God, it’s really fucking obnoxious that I can’t kiss you right now.”

“I was literally just thinking the same thing,” Eddie says. He takes a quick glance around the room. No one is looking at them, and even if they were, Eddie isn’t sure he’d even care. He presses up on his toes and captures Richie’s mouth in a brief, tender kiss.

Richie’s smiling before he even pulls away.

“That was pretty sneaky, 007,” Richie tells him. “I think we should give it another go.”

“Don’t push your luck,” Eddie warns.

Richie pulls him impossibly closer. “Oh, baby, all my luck got put towards making you fall in love with me, I don’t have any left. And hell, I don’t need it.”

“You’re so cheesy,” Eddie whines, but he tightens his grip around Richie’s neck anyway. The song is coming to a close and he knows they don’t have much time left, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t enjoy this for all it’s worth.

“It’s a wedding, it’s supposed to be cheesy,” Richie argues.

Eddie kisses Richie’s throat, the closest spot he can reach. Since he knows no one can see it. Since he knows that Richie loves him back.

#reddie #richie #eddie #my writing #stanbarbers #answered #whoop this ended up being 1.4k words. Will I Ever Shut Up #ANYWAY #I HOPE THIS IS CUTE #AND NOT TERRIBLE #LOVE U GABBY XOXO #<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

[richietoziersfootfetish]

Reddie Headcanons

General

Richie is a big gay. Not bi, or anything else

That being said, he's slept exclusively with women (outside of Eddie) to try to further deny himself

Eddie doesn't really give a shit about gender but is not promiscuous, or even sexual at all, unless he's head-over-heals

1980s

Richie is super repressed, Eddie is just genuinely oblivious and needs things spelled out for him

Richie has the BIGGEST, GAYEST crush on his boy Eddie and is becoming more obvious about it all the time, even though he's convinced he's playing it cool

Eddie is a bit sheltered and doesn't even realize Richie's feelings until told (potentially by other losers?), but once he starts paying attention he falls HARD

They're both super awkward about it

Probably nothing beyond heavy flirting happens before they leave Derry the first time

Also absolutely for the idea that Eddie might not even realize Richie is madly in love with him until after killing IT and they start their cute, awkward, slowburn teenager-flirting to eventual marriage relationship as 40 y/o men

Pre-renuinon

Richie is left with a hole that he can't seem to fill with friends, a successful career, or women (although he only even gives that a go when he's feeling especially void)

He's also developed a foot fetish and is probably into booty shorts and high socks too, but that's neither here nor there

Eddie has only ever loved his mother and Richie, and so finds himself drawn to fhe familiarity of Myra

But, after managing to avoid getting sent to bed early one night, he finds a vulgar comedian on late-night tv and, while the "comedy" invokes more eyerolls than laughter, it becomes a ritual that he hides from his wife without really understanding why

He's still very much a virgin

Post-reunion

There is immediate tension between the two even though they both try to play it off

Things go from 0 to 100 at the inn

Eddie's classy, not a prude - he has no hesitations stripping down once it's on

Richie is floored by Eddie's physique (thanks James Ransone), but Eddie's either not really into tattoos or just thought they'd be too much work to hide from his mom/Myra (maybe he gets some later in life once Richies helped him gain a bit more freedom back)

Richie is a lot more reserved about revealing his not quite as adonis-like, 40 y/o bod. Kid has a lot of insecurities

Richie tries to take the lead because he's obviously more experienced, but that only lasts for a bit because he's a hardcore bottom

Eddie is a bamf and takes the lead happily

Pretty sure Eddie didn't die, or smth

I'd love to hear any opinions / additions that anyone might have!!

#reddie #headcanon #reddie headcanon #it movie #it chapter 2 #it chapter 1 #eddie x richie #richie x eddie #richie #richie tozier #eddie #eddie kaspbrak #top!eddie #bottom!richie

[callmechee]

I like to read a fic where it gets to the point and Eddie’s divorce is fast and easy and he and Richie get together fast as fuck. But it always makes me feel a bit weird bc, atleast for me, it’s ooc.

I mean let’s start with the divorce. Eddie isn’t leaving Myra for Richie. He’s leaving bc his relationship is mutually toxic and he’s a gay man who’s abuse from his mother and forgotten past made him cycle into the same type of relationship he had with his mother, more or less. He needs to leave, and I think eventually Myra would see this as a good thing as well because like Eddie, the relationship isn’t good for her either. But, even though we all like to say Eddie would have a prenup because he’s a risk analyst, that’s just... no. He wouldn’t, actually. Eddie’s a huge pushover, and has been in a relationship with someone he’s been trying to convince himself he loves for years. There’s no way a 20 something year old Eddie K, who was trying to please his mom and make it seem like he genuinely wanted to be in this relationship, would have signed a prenup. Myra would’ve been insulted at the mention of it, and in Eddie’s mind at the time of their marriage, did not think he would be 40 years old and go back to his hometown to remember that he was abused as a child, repressed in his sexuality, and that he had more to live for than just his subconscious need and want to please his mother. I’m quite sure he thought he’d be with Myra until he kicked the fucking can so no, no prenup. It would be a much more stressful, drawn out divorce than a quick “I’m leaving bye.”

And onto Richie and Eddie. I do think it’s totally plausible that Eddie would move in with Richie or atleast into one of Richie’s houses, considering he will be suffering a bit financially from the divorce, and it would be the easiest option. But, we’re talking about two dumbasses who have been in love since they were kids who forgot each other and have a lot of shit to deal with. I mean Eddie has to deal with the divorce, and then focus on his sexuality before he can even think about a relationship. He needs time to heal, to figure himself out. And yeah, i think he can totally do that living with Richie. Sure, Richie is way more aware that he’s been in love with Eddie for quite sometime. But we tend to forget that Richie and Eddie are best friends. Esspecially living together, they would be extremely close, and Richie cares about Eddie’s well being over his own romantic feelings any day of the week. In all honesty, i doubt Richie would even think it was a possibility that Eddie would ever think of him in that way. Richie would be perfectly fine being a supportive, annoying, loud mouthed best friend, focusing on Eddie’s happiness and mental health as he figures things out in life. Do I think they’d eventually get together? Yeah. Duh. They’re in love with each other, but they love each other in a way that it’s sort of like a big painting, where when you’re standing in the middle of it, it’s hard to see the full picture. Everyone else can see how happy they are together, how domestic they’ve become. They’re touchy, and theyre loving and they bicker and argue but it’s so so evident to everyone but them that they’re totally gone for each other. I think it would take one of their friends to sit down with one of them and be like “hey, you do realize you’ve entered a committed relationship, right?” Because it’ll take Eddie some time to feel comfortable with himself and to truly feel happy. And once he is, and Richie is apart of that happiness, he won’t want to change anything that can disrupt his new life of feelings aren’t reciprocated. And Richie cares so much about Eddie’s well being that he’d be so cautious and gentile with Eddie’s emotions that he pushes his own feelings aside. Like I said, they are best friends. And they love each other so much that they would both be content with staying in the friend zone for the rest of their lives if it meant the other was happy.

So yeah, those dumbasses would need a little nudge. A confession, two, that would be emotional and so desperately obvious that they have to laugh about the time they wasted being too cautious. And once they finally get their shit together, they move fast. They want to spend the rest of their lives together and yeah, marriage is really a social construct and a piece of paper but you know what? Their marriage is legal now so they have to exercise those rights i mean, #gaypride. And they’re sappy losers who spent their whole lives waiting for this without even knowing it so yeah, they’re gonna get married and yeah they’re gonna be obnoxious about it because, fuck, they deserve it after all they went through.

They still joke around 80% the time, and argue about small things and fuss just for fun, but they also make sure they tell each other how much they love the other as much as they can and dance around the kitchen, make cookies at 1 A.M., take spontaneous trips and do every cliche, mushy, stupid thing they want. Because they know more than anyone that you have to cherish every little moment, and that life is short. It’s long, and messy, and the most slow burn, heart reaching thing ever. But they love each other. They’re best friends, they love each other, they’re in love with each other, and they deserve to be happy.

Period.

#this is a lot im so sorry #reddie #it #it chapter 2 #eddie kaspbrak #it 2017 #it 2019 #richie tozier

[noldorinwa]

Chocolate Box Letter

Dear Chocolate Box writer, 

Thank you for checking this out, and sorry about the delay! 

Here are a bunch of fandom and pairing-specific likes and prompts. All my requests are for fic, and I’m open to all ratings. I’m very excited for just about anything I might receive for any of these pairings, and so long as you stick to something related to my general likes, feel free to follow specific prompts as much or as little as you wish, depending on where inspiration takes you!

 I’m lunavagant on AO3.

General Likes

Worldbuilding

Casefic

Banter and humor

Canon divergence

Emotional vulnerability / repressed feelings / pining

Character study

Codependency 

Characters being possessive or jealous 

Loyalty

Hurt/comfort

Open endings / hopeful endings

Enemies to lovers / friends (especially childhood friends) to lovers

Smut specific likes: frottage; penetration; clothed sex; begging; orgasm delay/denial; emotional sex; power dynamics; overstimulation; fingering; oral sex 

DNWs

Unrequested death of requested characters

Unrequested tragic endings

Unrequested gender headcanons 

Pregnancy 

A/B/O

Bi Richie or Bi Eddie for IT 

 DISCWORLD

There isn't enough Discworld fic in the world, and I would be ecstatic to read just about anything for any combination of characters, really. Some that I am especially fond of but haven't nominated are Sybil, Nobby, William de Worde, Moist, Adora Belle, Polly Perks, and Maladict. 

Anything from a plotty fic to something humorous and dialogue-heavy would be the best thing ever. Footnotes are more than welcome if inspiration strikes. 

 Angua von Uberwald & Samuel Vimes

I would give just about anything for Sam and Angua buddy cop adventures in Ankh-Morpork and beyond. These cynical bastards are two of the characters in the Watch books that most closely resemble each other personality-wise, and anything involving them interacting would be a delight. 

Casefic of any kind, even just a snippet of an ongoing investigation, or everyday Watch shenanigans. 

I really enjoyed Angua and Sam's cameos in Monstrous Regiment, and would love to see more of something of that kind - either set during/post MR canon or in a different setting altogether. 

Any and all interactions with William or Moist especially would be amazing. Especially with both of them being aware that there is a werewolf in the Watch, and both of them very much Not knowing that the werewolf is Angua.    

 Havelock Vetinari & Samuel Vimes

(The tag doesn’t require it, but I’m all for making their relationship shippy – either explicitly or implicitly by hinting at suppressed feelings.)

Feel free to integrate these prompts with the Sam & Angua ones if you're inspired to. 

Pre-series: Sam ends up saving Vetinari’s life much earlier than canon – back when he’s been just recently promoted to Captain of the Watch, and Vetinari is still consolidating his power as Patrician. For all that he's still having to work to make himself heard and respected, young Vetinari probably privately enjoys Sam's irreverence more than he lets on. How does their relationship evolve from there? 

Amnesia fic in which Vetinari has a magic-related accident of some kind (or maybe it's a failed assassination attempt) and ends up forgetting the past five or so years. Maybe he wakes up to Sam sitting by the bed and immediately calls Sam “Captain” instead of Commander? 

Casefic, again! Bickering over case reports! Vetinari messing with Sam by sending people like government inspectors over to the Watch whenever Sam does something annoying (for that matter, what IS the story behind Vetinari sending over A.E. Pessimal? I am Dying to know). Discussions on the need for a free press in Ankh-Morpork, in light of the fact that A) Sam considers William to be a public menace but unfortunately B) Vetinari finds Sam's exasperation hilarious.  

Time travelling shenanigans inspired by Night Watch. Memories, glimpses of parallel realities, Young Sam and Young Havelock interacting. I am also 100% here for Young Vetinari/Sam!Keel.

Any combination of the above ideas, or something new entirely that fits my general likes would be great!

 IT (MOVIES)

Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier

Fandom specific DNWs: Bi Richie; Bi Eddie; Kidfic; Nicknames that aren’t movie canon

Eddie lives! He just does, because I said so. Angst and temporary character death are more than fine, though. 

I’m here for it all, to be honest, from frantic we-almost-died sex back at the hotel in Derry, to Richie and Eddie attempting to get back to their lives and staying “just friends”, and failing spectacularly. 

Infidelity, angsty misunderstandings, and messy attempts at dealing with your marriage when you're gay and in love with your male best friend are all concepts that are right up my alley with these two. 

Maybe Richie manages to push Eddie out of the way just in time while fighting It in the sewers, and gets injured himself. How does Eddie act with their positions reversed?

I have the biggest soft spot for the two of them as teens, and I would love any exploration of their relationship then. 

Finding excuses to get in each other’s space – sitting close together on the couch, or at the movies, in the hammock, sleeping in the same bed. Richie teasing Eddie constantly just to have an excuse to touch him. Eddie constantly nagging Richie to have an excuse to do the same.  

Sleepovers! Pretending to be asleep to ‘accidentally’ cuddle up to one another. Cuddling turning into something else. 

Banter turning into flirting and both of them insisting it’s all a big joke until it doesn’t feel like a joke anymore, but never taking the final step for fear of being wrong or rejected. Richie dealing with internalized guilt over wanting to touch his best friend in ways he’s not supposed to want.  

Richie crushing on Eddie and being terrified of being found out, but unable to bring himself to stop making jokes, or taking every chance to be as close to Eddie as possible. Richie struggling with himself over his desire to be physically close to Eddie – he would never do anything, so surely he’s allowed this? But then again if Eddie knew about the way Richie feels he wouldn’t want Richie to touch him at all. 

Eddie crushing on Richie and not even realizing it until he doesn’t have Richie’s attention directly on him for more than one minute, then getting restless, or insanely jealous in case Richie is directing said attention elsewhere.

All kinds of awkward but earnest teen explorations of sexuality would be delightful.  

If you’re inspired to write smut, I vastly prefer Richie bottoming and/or being generally submissive in bed. Eddie, on the other hand, probably gets a rush from finding out that Richie likes being told what to do. I also believe that it’s much more likely for Richie to be the one to freak out about (or during!) sex. For all that he’s just as repressed, Eddie is also a stubborn bastard, and once he’s concluded that he wants to sleep with Richie he would be a man on a mission. 

 KNIVES OUT

Marta Cabrera/Ransom Drysdale

I watched this movie by myself and only distantly registered the fact that I found the idea of these two appealing. Then I watched it again with my friend and about halfway through she went, "you know what, I ship this," and I realised that she was right.  

Someone in a different letter referred to this ship as Marta accidentally collecting a pet sociopath, and that's so on point I'm going to quote it. 

Angry sex, power dynamics, enemies to lovers, the possibilities are endless. Ransom deserves to be pushed around a bit and he’d be into it way more than he’d like to openly admit.

Canon divergence in which Ransom is still a total dick but not the killer. Maybe Marta really did accidentally kill Harlan. Maybe it was somebody else. Basically I'd just like to see more of the reluctant partnership they struck during the movie, with both of them finding each other's moral compasses (or lack thereof) an absolute pain in the ass. 

Post-canon, Ransom gets out of jail and finds that the family is still plotting to take Marta down, and if they can't do that through legal means, well. They'll just have to get creative. Either he decides to side with her for reasons unclear even to him, or they are thrown together by the circumstances and have no choice but to collaborate and lean on each other if they want to survive. Ransom insisting that he's only trying to keep Marta alive because he plans on getting money out of her somehow, even when it becomes clear that there's something else at play. 

Banter, fights, bickering and insulting each other while working together surprisingly – and annoyingly – well. Ransom surprising Marta by making the right choice at a critical moment, and then immediately going back to being an asshole. Marta fighting dirty and Ransom being into it.

Thank you for reading this, and have fun!

#chocolate box 2020 #choc box 2020 #mine

[lol-misantlery]

Yuletide 2019

Hello! I am misantlery on ao3.

Under the read more are specific details about what I want for Derry Girls, Mad Men, Queen’s Thief, Into the Spiderverse, Fleabag, and The Eagle.

General Likes

PINING, awkwardness, people being inexplicably fond of each other, breaking up/making up fic, people being emotionally repressed, denial, FORCED INTIMACY (pretending to be dating, bed sharing, huddling for warmth, trapped in elevator/closet/room together), amnesia fic, first times, hurt/comfort, trust issues, hooker aus, robot aus, happily ever afters.

I am good with g-rated or nc-17 rated fic, but if you’re comfortable writing porn here are some things I am into:

bad decision sex sexual experimentation fun/goofy/‘bad’ sex sex pollen intimacy issues

General Dislikes

rape/non con, alpha/beta/omega dynamics, mundane aus, soulmate marks aus, 24/7 BDSM, non canonical major character death, harm to animals, unhappy endings, mpreg, issuefic, harm to children.

If you want to know some more about what i’m into for each fandom/want some prompts, then keep reading but don’t stress about following each prompt to the letter or anything. They’re here for inspiration!

Why are you so into The Purge as a scenario???

Listen, this took me by surprise too. Explaining it now makes me sound like a crazy person. But I will try.

The Purge is a horror movie franchise, set in a dystopian near-future America where all crime is legal for one day a year, including murder. Pretty dark, edgy, violent stuff! I am not especially interested in the dark and grim sociopolitical realities of this situation, in case my prompts don’t make that clear. I am here for the absurdity, and in the case of most of these fandoms, for the weird and hilarious contrast between my requested fandom and the over the top violence of The Purge. You don’t even need to watch any of The Purge movies, because let’s be real, I don’t care about the world building or logistics here, and I’m not interested in a true crossover so much as I am in borrowing the “all crime is legal for a day” scenario. If any of the Purge prompts speak to you, read some wiki summaries and have at it.

Don’t feel obligated to write those prompts if these aren’t scenarios that appeal to you! And if you do write them, please, don’t make them super dark. Again, the appeal here is the absurdity, not the grim violence of it all.

Derry Girls: Erin Quinn, Clare Devlin, Michelle Mallon, James Maguire

Let me start off by saying you don’t need to include all four in a fic if you don’t want to! I’m perfectly happy with any configuration you end up putting together. If you want to include all the gang, that’s great too! I love everybody nominated so feel free to go wherever your imagination takes you.

I love how the group will spend all day making fun of each other but always come together when it counts. I would definitely enjoy you keeping with the show and doing something with that. Everyone going up on stage to perform with Orla and James realizing that he belongs as a Derry Girl are two of my favorite scenes.

Prompts:

Erin/Clare: I would love a fic where Erin and Clare really do go to prom together instead of the whole thing with Mae and John Paul. Maybe they go for real, or maybe Erin goes as her fake date to support her and then they have to continue the charade after prom. Erin would definitely do a lot of research and throw herself fully into being the best lesbian she could be, which obviously would include practicing kissing Clare a whole lot. I love a good fake dating fic that has the couple accidentally catching feelings. I also love the idea of everyone thinking she’s just making a statement and her dad being the only one to realize her feelings are for real.

I also love the idea of them bonding over a crush on Ms. De Brun, either after the first time or having her roll back into town and Erin going full Dean Pelton “This better not awaken anything in me.”

Michelle/James: I’m very into their combative but loving relationship. Michelle asking him to stay in the finale *__* I’m also very much into introducing a cousinfucking aspect but if you aren’t, don’t worry. I also enjoy how they are in the show, so if you keep their relationship at that level I’ll still be perfectly happy. If you are into it, Michelle totally gives off a “stop making love to me while I’m trying to fuck you” vibe and I would really enjoy seeing how annoyed she would be to realize he was more than just a ride to her.

Michelle gets caught in a time loop and has to figure out how to escape it. Maybe she lets James leave Derry all those other times and the version we see is the one she got right. Or maybe James and Michelle both get caught up in a loop and try increasingly ridiculous schemes to get out of it.

Or maybe Michelle’s mom gave up James’ room when she thought he was leaving with his mom and now James and Michelle have to share a room. They have to deal with all the feelings the finale brought up.

If you are more inspired by one of the other configurations please go for it. I loved James being instantly on Clare’s side when she came out. Finding out how Michelle and/or Erin and/or Clare’s friendship started would be fun. I liked James coming through for Erin when she got stood up. If you are more inspired by James and Erin please keep it platonic. I like them just as friends. I’m definitely open to James, Michelle, and Erin being queer/bi/etc if you’re interested in including that in any of these prompts.

Something based on this post: https://v1als.tumblr.com/post/187672633662/meanwhile-in-the-other-derry . If this appeals to you please go as wild as you want. Fic about the Derry Girls bullying a clown to death? Awesome! Fic about Mary Quinn beating the shit out of a dumb clown with a frying pan or Sister Michael being incredibly unimpressed by It? Love it. If you want to go to an angsty place I’m into it but I would prefer it doesn’t end with anybody perma-dead. I'd be equally happy with ships or no ships for this. No need to bring in the rest of the It characters unless you feel like it.

Mad Men: Bob Benson, Pete Campbell

This is probably my forever yuletide fandom! The show’s been over for a while now, but I still have an enormous soft spot for the love story of Bob and Pete, and would read any number of variations on it.

I don’t mind if you ignore certain parts of canon (s7) or go canon divergent, you can also follow canon if want (Bob shows up in Wichita??) GO WILD.

Shipping Bob/Pete began as a joke for me, but I do ship it for real. I like that Bob is all *_________* about Pete and Pete is simultaneously disgusted and intrigued. He might not be gay, but he’s definitely into someone who’s into him.

Also, if you just want to write about Bob I’d be really interested in his past and what the whole “manservant” deal was. We pretty much know nothing about him and I’d be interested in some backstory, but I’m not exactly looking for Bob/OMC PWP. In case it seemed that way!

btw, https://vimeo.com/132033248 is a supercut of all Bob/Pete scenes (pw: kneetouching). Enjoy!

Prompts:

Fake dating: The CEO of a big company is secretly gay and Pete thinks pretending to be gay will form a bond of solidarity that will give him an edge, but the CEO mistakes this for interest and Pete scrambles to come up with an excuse to get out of doing anything gay and he comes up with, “I have a lover! You may have met him…”

They go to a gay bar lolz and awkwardness ensue.

Pete molds Bob into the Perfect Ad Man and falls for him in the process. Basically “My Fair Lady” with a hillbilly and sodomy.

Groundhog day fic: Pete has to go through the same day again and again, tries to get help from Ken, Peggy, etc, and then comes to the realization that only Bob believes him.

Bob is a conman who starts out trying to seduce Pete as part of a long con, but ends up falling in love.

what if Bob is a spy who mistakes Pete for his contact because Pete compliments his tie? what kind of spy and mistaken identity shenanigans could ensue?

What if Bob and Pete + the Purge??? I feel like Bob would do well. He’s got secrets. Maybe one of those secrets is a facility with weaponry. Also, sodomy wasn’t legal in New York until the 1980s. What if someone in the office awkwardly asks Bob what he’s going to do during the Purge and Pete is appalled, because how uncouth! Everyone knows you don’t ask people what they’re going to do during the Purge! And then Bob makes some veiled comment about how he always spends his Purges banging dudes, and Pete is horribly Intrigued because sex stuff is never a Purge thing he’d thought of.

Queen’s Thief - Megan Whalen Turner: Gen, Attolia

I love these books, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that I love Attolia, Gen, and their relationship best. I didn't see the twist where Gen confessed his love to Attolia coming at all the first time I read it and I frantically read to the end to make sure that everything turned out ok. As soon as I got there, I flipped to the front and started again. Somewhere between that moment and when I reached that scene on the stairs again, they became one of my all time OTPs. To be honest, it was probably when she cut off his hand.

I just love them so much, with how ruthless Attolia is and how clever Gen is, and all I want is a fic that focuses on them and their sort of messed up dynamic and that will be enough. I also love Kamet/Costis and would be happy to see something about them in addition to some Gen/Attolia content. I'm open to canon divergent AUs, but, please, no AUs where Attolia doesn't cut off his hand.

Prompts:

Part of what I love so much about this pairing is how terrifyingly competent they are together, and what a good team they make. So I’d love a fic about something like, what if some of their barons are stupid enough to think that Gen and Attolia can be turned on each other? Obviously Gen and Attolia have to go crush them together.

They have to go on some kind of diplomatic visit to Eddis or Sounis or maybe something further afield and absolutely nothing goes as planned. Again, show me how terrifyingly competent they are! Or just go for the lolz: how hilariously wrong can things go, and how do Gen and Attolia deal with it? You can also go the action/adventure route: do they have to get themselves out of a sticky situation by fighting or sneaking around?

Speaking of sneaking around: I’m also into the many possibilities of the scenario where Gen teaches Attolia how to sneak into his bedroom for once. Sexy, funny, emotional, all of the above, I’m into any of it!

Part of the messed up dynamic that I love with these two is how fear and love and guilt are all mixed up together for them, after Attolia cuts off her hand. So I’d be really interested in anything about how/if Gen gets over his fear of Attolia in bed or not, but maybe definitely at least in part through sex.

And because I’ve got a soft spot for Costis and Kamet: Gen and Attolia attend Costis and Kamet's wedding, in disguise or not. Maybe it makes them think of their own wedding! Maybe everyone just reflects sappily on True Love! Or maybe someone gets up to shenanigans!  It’s up to you, dear writer!

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse: May Parker, Olivia Octavius

"My friends call me Liv," Doc Ock says to Miles. And then when she walks into Aunt May's house, May says, "Oh great, it's Liv." I would really love to read a lot more about what's going on with that. Sex is not a must, but I do ship them and anything about a romantic relationship would be great. If you're not into that, then I'd love to read more exploring their dynamic in general -- May is so fondly exasperated and not remotely surprised, but they both immediately go to the mat.

Prompts:

Pre-movie college backstory. Were they rivals-turned-lovers in college? Friendly but disinterested roommates who spent all their time playing science cloak-and-dagger games before realizing over spring break that their nemesis was their roommate? 

Pre-movie Spidey parallels backstory. May was clearly supporting Peter as he developed into your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, and Octavia has been... what? We know she's CEO of Alchemax during the movie -- was she promoted? Is she the founder? I'd love something exploring their parallel paths, May as a behind-the-scenes string-puller and Liv as a mad scientist, with Peter in the middle working to counter Liv more explicitly. 

Post-movie, MIles goes to visit Aunt May and finds Liv there. They have a really awkward tea. 

Post-movie, Liv tries to make a comeback. May rolls her eyes and gets to work.

Purge!AU: What happens to the two of them on Purge night? Does May reluctantly go out to try to stop whatever Liv is up to this time? Do they end up working together for some reason? Do they declare it amateur night and just order a pizza?

Also, I would be interested in a fun fic where May and Liv both end up sort of awkwardly mentoring Miles because Miles and Liv end up in a classic supervillian-superhero team-up against some other big villain or disaster.

Fleabag: Fleabag, Priest

So I watched all of Fleabag in a weekend fueled by pizza and beer and loved all of it. But, not gonna lie, what really got me to sit down and finally watch the show was all this talk of a hot priest romance going on in season 2. Others may never believe Moriarty from BBC Sherlock could bring it like that, but I saw the light.

I’m absolutely fine with shippy fic for this fandom. If you want to go down the hardcore priest fucking road then go wild, but I did love everything about the show. Fleabag herself and all of her issues, Claire (and her haircut) and everyone else. Whatever you can write for me that captures how heartbreaking and funny the show is would be great, I'm sure.

Prompts:

With all this talk of the cool Pope maybe considering letting priests marry let’s pretend that the Vatican really does that and now priests everywhere can get married. How would Fleabag feel when she sees the news on the telly? How would the Priest? Imagine them bumping into each other after the news come out.

I think one of the most interesting things about season 2 was the Priest knowing when Fleabag was breaking the fourth wall. What if the fox is his personal fourth wall that no one sees but Fleabag that he can’t leave behind until he deals with his shit? 

Purge prompt: Brexit finally happens and the new PM decides to try this Purge thing the Americans have been doing every year. How would Fleabag fare in the purge? Would she stay locked inside with her family having to fight off Stepmother, who’s down to do some purging herself and is scarily good at killing people? Would she go off to hunt Martin? Maybe fucking a Priest doesn’t count if it’s during purge night.

The Eagle | Eagle of the Ninth: Marcus Flavius Aquila, Esca Mac Cunoval

I love this stupid movie so much.I love Marcus, Esca, and Marcus/Esca and would prefer them shipped. UST/pre-slash is okay, too, if you'd rather not write a romance, but please at least leave me the hope that it's going to happen!

What I really love about Marcus/Esca is how even when Marcus is the one who holds official power over Esca as his owner, Esca is always the one with the power in their relationship because Marcus is so desperately into him. I love Marcus pining for Esca but being too honourable to do anything about it, while Esca is too angry at himself for pining for Marcus to do anything about it. I also enjoy Marcus having Roman issues about wanting Esca to fuck him and I don't care if they're not entirely historically accurate. I would just be very into Marcus having very rigid ideas about sex between men and struggling with wanting Esca to fuck him and Esca helping him overcome that.

Some general things about them that I love, both in the movie and in potential fic: cultural miscommunications, or just them worrying enough about miscommunication that they don't even try. Marcus having such utter blind trust in Esca. Esca having to relearn how to let somebody care about him.

Prompts:

That said, my first request is PWP. /o\ I would really, really love a Seal People Made Them Do It fic. Maybe the Seal Prince wants Esca to prove Marcus is his slave, or maybe there's a general boning festival going on and it'd be weird/suspicious for Esca not to participate, I don't know (and not too concerned with historical accuracy on this one). But I'm very into the danger element of they have to fake it for their safety/survival and the intimacy element of them understanding each other with few or no words. Like from Esca's POV, he gets that Marcus understands and consents, or from Marcus', understanding that if he doesn't want to go along with it, they can try to kill their way out. And, okay, if Marcus is a little ashamed of being into it, I am very, very there for that. :9

I would also love a roadtrip fic! The movie clearly ends with Marcus setting Esca up to choose their next adventure, so what does he choose? I don't have a lot of specific plot ideas for that, but I would definitely love to see them on another journey together, maybe hitting all the fun roadtrip tropes, like huddling for warmth in the woods and there being only one bed in their room at the hospitia. 

Or, if you're feeling up to something fun and weird, a Purge AU. Honestly, Ancient Rome is a setting that seems oddly suited to hosting the Purge and I would love to see it either played relatively straight to dark and dramatic effect, or humorously deconstructed, with Esca exasperated by more let's-kill-people Roman nonsense.

I would also really be into fic from Esca's POV, holding Marcus during the surgery and contemplating letting twitch and die, and then ~looking into his eyes~ and feeling sick with himself for having such a thought about the man who saved his life, even if he is a Roman asshole. Perhaps followed by all the times Esca could have had him killed or let him die and deciding not to because HONOR until he realizes no, actually, I just really, really want to bone this dude. And then he follows up on that realization, in whatever romantic form that takes.

#yuletide #derry girls #fleabag #queen's thief #mad men #the eagle #into the spiderverse

[ireadyabooks]

New Year, New Books!

Happy 2019, book nerds! Now that we’ve cleaned up the confetti from New Year’s Eve, it’s time to get serious about some resolutions: reading as many books as we possibly can in 2019! 

If your TBR pile needs some love, we’ve got you covered. Here are some of our faves coming your way in early 2019! 

The Love and Lies of Rukhsana Ali

Available January 29th

Seventeen-year-old Rukhsana Ali has always been fascinated by the universe around her and the laws of physics that keep everything in order. But her life at home isn't so absolute. Unable to come out to her conservative Muslim parents, she keeps that part of her identity hidden. And that means keeping her girlfriend, Ariana, a secret from them too. Luckily, only a few more months stand between her carefully monitored life at home and a fresh start at Caltech in the fall. But when Rukhsana's mom catches her and Ariana together, her future begins to collapse around her. Devastated and confused, Rukhsana's parents whisk her off to stay with their extended family in Bangladesh where, along with the loving arms of her grandmother and cousins, she is met with a world of arranged marriages, religious tradition, and intolerance. Fortunately, Rukhsana finds allies along the way and, through reading her grandmother's old diary, finds the courage to take control of her future and fight for her love.

Amazon

Barnes & Noble 

IndieBound

Spin

Available January 29th

Even in murder, the music lives on. When rising star Paris Secord (aka DJ ParSec) is found dead on her turntables, it sends the local music scene reeling. No one is feeling that grief more than her shunned pre-fame best friend, Kya, and ParSec's chief groupie, Fuse -- two sworn enemies who happened to be the ones who discovered her body. The police have few leads, and when the trail quickly turns cold, the authorities don't seem to be pushing too hard to investigate further. But nobody counted on Paris's deeply loyal fans, ParSec Nation, or the outrage that would drive Fuse and Kya to work together. As ParSec Nation takes to social media and the streets in their crusade for justice, Fuse and Kya start digging into Paris's past, stumbling across a deadly secret. With new info comes new motives. New suspects. And a fandom that will stop at nothing in their obsessive quest for answers, not even murder...

Amazon

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IndieBound

The Deceiver’s Heart

Available February 26th

In this sequel to the instant New York Times bestseller The Traitor's Game, Kestra Dallisor has finally gained possession of the Olden Blade. With the dagger in her control, she attempts to destroy the tyrannical Lord Endrick. But when Kestra fails, the king strips her of her memory, and leaves her weak and uncertain, bound to obey him. Heartbroken, Simon is desperate to return Kestra to the rebel she was, but refuses to use magic to heal her. With untrusting Coracks and Halderians threatening to capture and kill her, and war looming on the horizon, Kestra and Simon will have to learn to trust each other again if they have any hope of surviving. But can a heart once broken ever be healed?

Amazon

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IndieBound

The Music of What Happens

Available February 26th

Max: Chill. Sports. Video games. Gay and not a big deal, not to him, not to his mom, not to his buddies. And a secret: An encounter with an older kid that makes it hard to breathe, one that he doesn't want to think about, ever. Jordan: The opposite of chill. Poetry. His "wives" and the Chandler Mall. Never been kissed and searching for Mr. Right, who probably won't like him anyway. And a secret: A spiraling out of control mother, and the knowledge that he's the only one who can keep the family from falling apart. Throw in a rickety, 1980s-era food truck called Coq Au Vinny. Add in prickly pears, cloud eggs, and a murky idea of what's considered locally sourced and organic. Place it all in Mesa, Arizona, in June, where the temp regularly hits 114. And top it off with a touch of undeniable chemistry between utter opposites. Over the course of one summer, two boys will have to face their biggest fears and decide what they're willing to risk -- to get the thing they want the most.

Amazon

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IndieBound

Pretend She’s Here

Available February 26th

Emily Lonergan's best friend died last year. And Emily hasn't stopped grieving. Lizzie Porter was lively, loud, and fun -- Emily's better half. Emily can't accept that she's gone. When Lizzie's parents and her sister come back to town to visit, Emily's heartened to see them. The Porters understand her pain. They miss Lizzie desperately, too. Desperately enough to do something crazy. Something unthinkable. Suddenly, Emily's life is hurtling toward a very dark place -- and she's not sure she'll ever be able to return to what she once knew was real.

Amazon

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IndieBound

Last of Her Name

Available February 26th

Sixteen years ago, rebellion swept the galaxy known as the Belt of Jewels. Every member of the Leonov royal family was murdered--down to their youngest child, Princess Anya--making way for the Union government to seize power. But Stacia doesn't think much about politics. She spends her days half-wild, rambling her father's vineyard with her friends, Clio and Pol. That all changes when a Union ship appears burning through the sky, bearing the leader of the Union, the Direktor Eminent himself, who declares that Stacia's sleepy village is a den of empire loyalists. Even more shocking, the Direktor claims that Princess Anya Leonova is alive--and Stacia is the lost princess As their home explodes into chaos, Pol smuggles Stacia to a hidden escape ship, leaving Clio in the hands of the Union. With everything she knows threading away into the stars, Stacia sets her heart on a single mission: She will find and rescue Clio, even with the whole galaxy on her trail.

Amazon

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IndieBound

That’s Not What I Heard

Available February 26th

What did you hear? Kimberly Landis-Lilley and Teddy Lin are over. Yes, the Kim and Teddy broke up. At least that's what Phil Spooner thinks he overheard and then told Jess Howard, Kim's best friend. Something about Teddy not liking Kim's Instas? Or was it that Teddy is moving to Italy and didn't want to do long distance? Or that Kim slid into someone else's DMs? Jess told her boyfriend, Elvis, that he needs to be on Kim's side. Especially if he wants to keep her as his girlfriend. But Elvis is also Teddy's best friend. Now, Kim's run out of school for the day. Jess is furious. Elvis is confused. And half the lunch period won't talk to Teddy. Even the teachers have taken sides. William Henry Harrison High will never be the same again!

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

IndieBound

Tell Me Everything

Available February 26th

Your secret's safe...until it's not. Ivy's always preferred to lay low, unlike her best friend Harold, who has taken up a hundred activities as sophomore year begins. But Ivy has her own distraction: the new anonymous art-sharing app, VEIL. Being on the sidelines has made Ivy a skilled observer, and soon she discovers that some of the anonymous posters are actually her classmates. While she's still too scared to put her own creations on the app, Ivy realizes that she can contribute in an even better way -- by making gifts for the artists she's discovered. The acts of kindness give her such a rush that, when Ivy suspects Harold is keeping a secret, she decides to go all in. Forget gifts -- Harold needs a major party. But when her good intentions thrust her into the spotlight, Ivy's carefully curated world is thrown into chaos. Now she has to find the courage to stand out... or risk losing everything and everyone she loves most.

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

IndieBound

Mike

Available February 26th

Mike is the imaginary friend and projection of a repressed wish that won’t go away until Floyd confronts both his greatest fear and greatest desire: to succeed. MEET FLOYD. He's a tennis star. Possibly good enough to win Wimbledon one day. MEET MIKE. He's... different. Apart from anything else, Floyd seems to be the only one who can see him. But Mike must have appeared for a reason. And finding out why is perhaps the most important thing Floyd will ever do...

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

IndieBound

Sorry Not Sorry

Available February 26th

Janelle and Alyssa used to be friends. Best friends. They knew each other's deepest secrets and went through the hardest times together. But that was then. Now? Their status is somewhere between frenemies and full-on rivals. Janelle is all about making a difference in her community, while Alyssa reigns over the shallowest girls in school. Until the day Alyssa collapses and is rushed to the hospital. Suddenly, everyone knows about her declining health and race against time. And, in a stunning twist of fate, the only person who might be able to save Alyssa's life -- is Janelle. But will the girls' bitter past get in the way of their futures?

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Brawler

Available March 26th

Eddie MacIntyre--Mac to a handful of friends--is Pennsylvania's most promising wrestler. His future is bright with scholarship offers and the dream of helping his struggling mom. But then comes a fateful match at the state championship, when his famous rage consumes him and he assaults a referee. In an instant, Mac loses all he and his mom have worked to build since his abusive father was locked up years ago. Facing arrest, Mac runs away to another town, where he is taken in by a shady promoter who has followed his career. He recruits Mac into Brawlers, an illegal underground fighting ring run by a gangland boss. This is a bloodsport that has no rules . . . but offers plenty of reward. Mac teams up with Khajee, a girl with the fighting skills he'll need to learn to survive . . . and her own dark past tying her to the head of the ring. Together the two must figure out their place in a world that hasn't been kind to them . . . and forge a future that could be.

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Quarantine: A Love Story

Available March 26th

Oliver wants a girlfriend, and there's a girl back home who might be interested in him. The problem is, he has to spend his spring break on a volunteer trip in the Dominican Republic. Flora, on the other hand, isn't really looking for a boyfriend. She just wants to end a miserable spring break visiting her dad and her new stepmom in the D.R. The solution to both their problems? Get back home to New York ASAP. Sadly, they won't be getting there anytime soon. Their hopes are dashed when Flora's impulsiveness lands them in quarantine -- just the two of them. Now, the two teens must come together in order to survive life in a bubble for 30 days. In that time, love will bloom. But is it the real thing, or just a placebo effect?

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I Don’t Want To Be Crazy

Available March 26th

This is a true story of growing up, breaking down, and coming to grips with a psychological disorder. When Samantha Schutz first left home for college, she was excited by the possibilities -- freedom from parents, freedom from a boyfriend who was reckless with her affections, freedom from the person she was supposed to be. At first, she reveled in the independence . . . but as pressures increased, she began to suffer anxiety attacks that would leave her mentally shaken and physically incapacitated. Thus began a hard road of discovery and coping, powerfully rendered in this poetry memoir.

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Dear Ally, How Do You Write a Book?

Available March 26th

Have you always wanted to write a book, but don't know where to start? Or maybe you're really great at writing the first few chapters . . . but you never quite make it to the end? Or do you finally have a finished manuscript, but you're not sure what to do next? Fear not -- if you have writing-related questions, this book has answers! Whether you're writing for fun or to build a career, bestselling author Ally Carter is ready to help you make your work shine. With honesty, encouragement, and humor, Ally's ready here to answer the questions that writers struggle with the most. Filled with practical tips and helpful advice, Dear Ally is a treasure for aspiring writers at any stage of their careers. It offers a behind-the-scenes look at how books get made, from idea to publication, and gives you insight into the writing processes of some of the biggest and most talented YA authors writing today.

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#I read YA #booklr #book love #young adult lit #diverse reads #books #bookworm #bookish #book nerd #new books #reading

[postpunkpontypandyphantomthief]

Eddie! it’s time we talk about our feelings

(Hurt/Comfort) (tw! references to mental health and alcohol misuse)

Richie suggests having a chat about something Eddie isn't prepared for when the tv has nothing good on.....feelings, all that soppy stuff, Richie is the emotional one, Eddie usually is not, that is until this chat makes them have some realizations and reconciliation?

In the Hammersmith flat, it was quieter than usual, there were no fights, no yelling, Richie and Eddie were just sitting on the sofa together.

Nothing good was on

Eddie flicked the remote multiple times

“oh come on, there must be something saucy on one of these channels”

Eddie kept flicking the channels

“Young man I think that’s enough, if you keep switching from channel to channel, you’ll break the television set and I’m not paying for that”

Eddie turned over at him as he switched it off  “what, it’s not like you don’t watch television as well while you're making those science experiments you call meals”

Richie rolled his eyes, “No, it’s because we’d both have the pay the damages as we share the tv and if it did get smashed we wouldn’t be able to pay for it”

After going off to the kitchen to get some tea, there was more quietness, Richie looked down at his teacup as he stirred it around with his spoon, “you know Eddie, we don’t usually get quiet moments like this, this could give us a chance to talk about our feelings more you know, instead of repressing it through mindless reckless behaviour”

Eddie gave him an unhappy look before he raised his gravelly voice slightly, “it’s not a quiet moment, because your never quiet and the mindless, reckless behaviour is fun, booze, pub quizzes, getting girls, it’s all a good laugh”

Richie was unhappy with how Eddie was acting, he whined, “I am in fact the quietest that I have been and when the reckless behaviour is excessive, it’s unhealthy for you, that pub quiz wasn’t even successful we got involved with skull crusher, because of your fake money idea, How do you think I feel?, do you think I like looking back on every unsuccessful flirting attempt, every social cue I didn’t understand, every day that ended up going badly when I wanted it to be good, honestly today we are going to be settling our issues like men”

Eddie kept jabbering, “Are you asking for a fight then?”

Richie held his hand out in a form of surrender, “No, No fights this time, we are just going to talk”

Eddie said, “Talk?, about what, about how you can never get with women, about how great Napoleon was at Tamagotchi, how Nigella Lawson’s dress was absolutely ravishing this morning?”

Richie straightened his tie and pouted, “no, no, not about any of that….we are going to talk about our feelings and our emotions and our issues, we are going to try and get some closure”

Eddie sipped some tea as he mumbled to himself “oh no, he’s going to go on about some philosophical soppy bollocks isn’t he?”

Richie clapped his hands together, “now I would like you to tell me, what your issues are with me, now try to not word them in an insulting way please, as I just want to know why I bother you so much and what I can do to be less annoying”

Eddie mumbled to himself, “why do I bloody start, my number of issues with rich would be as big as my Christmas list, and of course he’s making this about himself, sooner or later he’s going to be having some ramble about who knows what”

Eddie stared at Richie, who didn’t say a word as he continued to wait for Eddie’s response

Eddie mumbled again, “wow, he’s serious, I guess I’ll give an answer”

“Well...you do tend to be very self-absorbed a lot of the time, why is that, why you seek attention so much Richie, why do you always humiliate yourself when socialising with ladies or with my friends, why are you so overly emotional and girly, why are you so sad and perverted, why are you so bad at cooking, why do you go off about history you barely know the accurate facts about, why did you make me do that liposuction thing that one time, why did you cause a drama about Miss World, why did you cause such a tantrum about being a shopkeeper?”

Richie was taken aback by how the question was worded but tried to give an explanation anyway

“Oh….Well you see Eddie, I’m just a very lonely person when your not around and even I am with other people I just have no idea how to talk to them, I don’t know their social cues, I don’t know what their interests are, I would talk about other topics If I knew what topics to talk about, but I’m just simply not as informed about other topics, this also carries into my dating skills, I’ve learned through my magazines I’m not the casanova I wish to be as I’m just too awkward sometimes, I do want to truly fall in love someday but it would have to be someone I’m socially compatible with, I didn’t intend to be rude to the lesbians we met that one time, I just didn’t know until they told me, I didn’t understand boundaries and my views on people who aren’t straight were very outdated, I was raised conservative and that’s how I was told to view gay people, but I see now that they are just people like everybody else”

“I guess when I’m around people like Spudgun and Dave Hedgehog, my inability to communicate can get me frustrated and it can make me appear very stuck up, that and again my outdated conservative values, this isn’t the 90s anymore, times are changing and so are we”

“My bad cooking probably stems from my mother’s notoriously bad sandwiches, but I am learning, I am trying to be better, if you have any tips or cookbooks you recommend, I am eager to give them a go, I know you joke that I’m trying to poison you but I’m not as I just need to develop my skills more and I’d rather we have food on the table than nothing at all even if it’s not food that tastes good.

“The liposuction thing was a mistake to look hunky which just caused damage to my balls, beauty standards were so ridiculous back then, did you know most magazine cover art is done by computers now, they give us unrealistic expectations, no wonder half of the ladies we could list in our preferences were just supermodels we’d have no chance with”

“And I was not causing a “drama” about miss world young man, it was you that started it all just because you didn’t want to eat the meal I prepared for you, you could’ve just said if we could watch it without making the lie about the bet and then I wouldn’t have crashed into the dustbin, although that was also your fault as you left the window open, see! not everything I do is my fault sometimes you need to acknowledge your mistakes too”

“The shopkeeper thing was I guess my competitive streak and the fact we’ve both been jobless for such a long time that to have a job even if it was temporary just felt very good, sometimes when I have power, I misuse it, because I’m not used to it but I would rather have a job I enjoy instead of working at an office all day for some git who earns more money than me”

“My pervertedness is probably my deviancy and sometimes I can take my sex-positivity way too far, but now I know there are a time and a place for it”

“I seek genuine love and attention, sometimes I come across as a mean person because of my ignorance and competitiveness, but I am trying to do better, just by simply having this conversation, we’re getting our words out constructively instead of punching each other’s faces in”

“Talking about your emotions is not girly, it’s important to acknowledge issues instead of ignoring them when you ignore issues, they just continue to consume you, we shouldn’t repress our feelings and hide under shells, we were brought up in a generation that didn’t care about feelings, no wonder we acted the way we did, if you don’t listen, people get hurt and sometimes the person getting hurt is you, also some people are just generally more sensitive to some things and I’m one of those people, there’s nothing wrong with being a man who doesn’t look like a bodybuilder, in fact, I admire how agile and athletic you are compared to me.

After trying to process everything Richie said, Eddie quietly said, “you mean all of this?”

Richie nodded, “I mean every word,this is me being honest”

There was more silence,Eddie thought for a second about the lecture that Richie had given about his past actions and also the importance of the one soppy subject he avoided talking about….feelings

He self reflected himself on his actions,the miss world drama,the wolverhampton visit, he felt humiliated, he started to realize that maybe richie didn’t enjoy it when his past mistakes would be brought into the conversation,Eddie wasn’t used to addressing his own elephant in the room so he did something that he rarely did….he sobbed.

Eddie looked down as the waterworks started,he winced and sniffled as he tried to not let his glasses get smudged,he felt bad,he felt bad about how he treated Richie occasionally,he felt bad about how many times he repressed issues instead of addressing them,this was a new realization for him,he’d have a go at richie for being smug and competitive but on some days he was no different,he felt bad for not understanding richie’s perspective,he felt bad about the one thing he was constantly reminded of when walking into the dreaded dole office, he was jobless and didn’t have much money,he knew at times he was a bit too self destructive,he was lucky to have Richie,if Richie wasn’t there to tend to his wounds or calm him down after a bad day,he’d probably be dead or in jail”

Eddie continued to cry,he rarely cried but there he was,with tears running down his face like a waterfall,he knew he had issues,metaphorically he could get help,but he didn’t know how,he hadn’t even told spudgun and dave hedgehog about his self destruction habit,then again it’s not like the government was giving them many options that didn’t involve waiting lists or prices he couldn’t afford

Eddie whimpered and wailed,he wasn’t used to this soppy bollocks,but he’d rather do that and add to the repeating cycle of hiding issues under the rug instead of addressing them.

Richie looked concerned as he heard his flatmates raspy bawling, he frowned and turned his eyebrows as he was shocked to see Eddie of all people on earth,having a sob.

Richie shuffled closer to Eddie on the sofa as he wrapped his arm over Eddie’s shoulder, rubbing calming circles on his back smoothly as he reassured him in a soft toned voice “Eddie!..it’s ok, it’s ok to vent sometimes,

Eddie kept bawling, he held Richie into a hug as he tried to explain what he was self reflecting about

Richie kept softly rubbing the back of the flatmate until he calmed down,he tried to use his words in a constructively way this time, “There There, it’s alright,we can get out of this,you’ve got me to talk to,I’ll be here to listen,I stopped relying on the conservative party ages ago after I realized they’ve done bugger all to help working class people like us,we’ll get you help,we’ll get whatever treatment it takes and maybe if we look around enough,we might even get jobs and we can go on more holidays,stuff our faces and maybe work on our flirting skills along the way”

Eddie stopped whimpering, “t-that, that would be nice actually”, “you know, your a good friend Richie”, he dried his tears, “I’m sorry for not understanding how you felt sometimes and I’m sorry for being too self destructive,we’ve all got our issues,but we won’t let them define us,”

Richie quickly handed him a tissue, as Eddie blowed his nose,he leaned his shoulder over to Richie,

“Best mates?”

Richie then gently held his hand, “Best mates”

They then just snuggled for the rest of the day,eventually ordering a chinese takeaway and turning the tv back on to watch a film together.

#bbc bottom #fanfic #richie richie #richie and eddie