#ultraindependence

[gailweiner]

#ultra independence #ultraindependent #hyper independence #extreme independence #quotes

[lovejam]

Sis, the inability to receive support from others is a trauma response.

Your “I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself” conditioning is a survival tactic. You needed it to shield your tender heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you.

From the parent who was absent by choice or by the circumstance of working three jobs to feed and house you.

From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but no offered no safe haven that honored your heart.

From the friendships that always took more than they gave.

From all the situations when someone told you “we’re in this together” then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when isht got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too.

From the lies. The betrayals.

You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point.

Ultra-independence is a *trust issue.*

You learned: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will always drop the ball sooner or later, right?

You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt women who came before you. #generationaltrauma #ancestraltrauma

Ultra-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak.

So, you don’t trust anyone.

And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people.

To trust is to hope, to trust is vulnerability.

“Never again,” you vowed.

But matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall.

Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either.

Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming.

It’s trauma response.

The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed.

You are worthy of having support.

You are worthy of having true partnership.

You are worthy of love.

You are worthy of having your heart held.

You are worthy to be adored.

You are worthy to be cherished.

You are worthy to have someone say, “You rest. I got this.” And actually deliver on that promise.

You are worthy to receive.

You are worthy to receive.

You are worthy to receive.

You are worthy.

Worthy, sis.

You are worthy.

You don’t have to earn it.

You don’t have to prove it.

You don’t have to bargain for it.

You don’t have to beg for it.

You are worthy.

Worthy.

Simply because you exist.

I love you. 🧡~J.

Credit: Original image by Rising Woman, reposted from The Womb Sauna. Commentary by moi, Jamila White (FB: @inspiredjamila, IG: @inspired.jamila)

#ultraindependence #ultra-independence #wow #words of wisdom #self-worth #independence #ptsd #mental health #trust no one #trust

[littlebent-notbroken]

While these examples are primarily focused on boundaries in relationships, I think they can be applied to other things in life. For example, rigid boundaries in workplace could look avoiding a coworker or even a whole department/area of the office (may or may not be from personal experience lollll). It can look like denying yourself help from others, or even being unwilling to help others. With rigid boundaries, there is no contact, limiting all possibility of intimacy or emotional connection or impact. Denying any flow of emotion from other people to you, and also from you to other people. Rigid boundaries can become unhealthy when the lack of emotional connection leads to hyper independence. Hyper independence is the "I have to do everything myself and I don't need anybody else to help me" attitude, which can be unsustainable and lead to resentment, exhaustion, and burnout. *Having rigid boundaries doesn't mean you're "bad" or broken. We may adopt rigid boundaries to avoid people and the way they make us feel, to not allow ourselves to be vulnerable. But we can also adopt them to prevent further harm from an abuser (I.e. going no contact). So if we think of rigid boundaries as unscalable walls and collapsed boundaries the floodgates always being open (nothing to stop the flow of energy coming in or out)…we can think of healthy boundaries as a drawbridge that can be lowered and raised, where the flow of energy is monitored and controlled. Can you identify where you have rigid boundaries in your life? And where healthy boundaries need to be placed instead? === Seeking support in setting healthier boundaries? 🦋Hi, I'm Marisa! I'm a trauma informed life coach with a mission to empower survivors of emotional and mental abuse reclaim their birthright of self love and compassion. Interested in more info? Check out the link in my bio or “coaching” highlight or shoot me a DM!🦋 #rigidboundaries #emotionallydetached #hyperindependence #selfsufficient #ultraindependence #nocontact #avoidantattachment #avoidance #emotionallyunavailable #burnoutprevention #resentment (at San Francisco Bay Area) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNxwMhIDDIa/?igshid=12d0fc0rttrg2

#rigidboundaries #emotionallydetached #hyperindependence #selfsufficient #ultraindependence #nocontact #avoidantattachment #avoidance #emotionallyunavailable #burnoutprevention #resentment

[creatingquirks]

Can i request a quirk matchup? Im a gemini sun, capricorn moon, and leo rising. My personality type is INFP. I think im an ambivert, I tend to bottle things up and use ultraindependence as a coping mechanism. I like embroidering, I procrastinate, I'm very much a leftist, I can be impulsive, and if possible id like my quirk to be useful in combat or self defense? Im both hispanic and Latina and love the moon and sun. I love learning abt folk magic and also both STEM and humanities.

Hi, hope you like this!

I give you.......

Puppy Eyes

Quirk type: emmiter

Quirk summary: you have the ability give someone the puppy eyes and once you do they are very included to do what you ask, like ask something do someone using your quirk and they will almost always certainly do it.

Drawbacks: the more you use your quirk in someone the more immune to it they become.

#bnha imagines #bnha quirks #mha quirks #bnha #mha #bnha headcanons #mha headcanons #bnha x reader #mha x reader #mha imagines #mha matchup #bnha matchup #matchups #matchup

[germandejuana]

Tweeted

El President del CGPJ i del TS Carlos Lesmes demana al Govern Ñ q protegeixi Llarena de la Justícia belga per demostrar al món sencer q la Justícia espanyola és ultraindependent i que mai de la vida se li acudiria demanar ajuda al Govern per protegir Llarena de la Justícia belga.

— Xavier F. Domènech (@xavidomenech99) July 10, 2018

#IFTTT #Twitter

[gailweiner]

#ultraindependent #ultra independence #hyper independence #extreme independence #quote

[gailweiner]

#ultraindependent #hyper independence #extreme independence #ultra independence #quote #quotes

[gailweiner]

#ultraindependent #ultraindependence #hyperindependent #hyperindependent #extremeindependent #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #selfcare #selflove #anxiety #love #mentalhealthmatters #depression #motivation #wellness #mindfulness #healing #quotes #inspirationalquotes #growth #lifelessons #transformation #growthmindset #mindsetcoach #empowerment #instagood #lifecoachforwomen