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#ugh. the best!
daysfullofdreams · 3 months
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just realized I never posted this on here but I met Cecily Strong like a week ago and yes I’m still screaming crying throwing up over it
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ruubesz-draws · 6 months
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He's a little confused, but he got the spirit!
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(He's trying his best, leave him alone!)
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figscigfigs · 2 months
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emily offering fig’s cursed bardics whenever she can is truly peak comedy for me
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konigsblog · 2 months
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a continuation from this post. ;3
baker-könig who puts his cum your food... 🍰🍪🧁
cw: perv!könig, loser!könig. MDNI 18+ 🔞
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baker-könig adores your reaction to his baked goods. the sweetness and the tanginess of the tarts he provides and bakes for you, his girthy, hot cock throbbing in the tight confines of his boxer briefs when you comment on the touch of saltiness.
he spends hours in the kitchen, sweat dripping from his forehead and the smell of the warm, sugary desserts catching your attention. what you don't know is that könig has jerked off into the bowl, mixing his bitter and salty arousal into the batter. he's so eager to hear your comments and compliments, getting off later in private to your words playing back in his head.
each stroke leaves könig breathless, his calloused fingers wrapped around his meaty shaft, gripping his large, hung cock firmly. there is flour and sugar all over the countertops, and ingredients are scattered around the kitchen. fat globs of his hot, thick release are spurted from the head of his lengthy dick and into the mixing bowl, his breath laborious and heavy.
he watches as you take a bite of the freshly baked, delicious cupcake, giggling at the perfect taste. you smile at him, telling him it's the best batch you've ever tasted. fuck, your compliments leave könig sexually frustrated, grinning perversely, and eyeing you up as you enjoy multiple of the cupcakes.
only when you suck him off for the first time do you recognise the familiar saltiness in his thick cum...
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jkslipppiercing · 4 months
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Never Been A Friend | Part 1 | Jeon Jk
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♧ synopsis: Sneaky glances across the room weighed with a dozen different meanings left to be unsaid; confusion, desire, lust. He was never a friend, was he?
♧ pairing: brother's bsf!jk, bratty!reader.
♧ warnings: y/n is too drunk to form a sentence, jungkook loves cursing, jungkook is jealous out of his mind, kinda enemies but not really, jungkook calls y/n a brat that he cant stand, someone calls y/n a slut, and that's all i can remember 😙
♧ WC: 1.6K
♧ a/n: hello loves! wrote this in one sitting and it's barely edited, but the intention is there lmao i love you all so much please enjoy! dont hesitate to tell me what you think <3 im like the no.1 supporter for constructive criticism lol okay thank you byeeeee
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JK's POV
She whines,
Throws tantrums,
Acts like a goddamn brat for the sake of being annoying,
And I still want her lips around my cock.
Why?
That goes beyond the fucking level of my emotional understanding.
I want her wrapped around my finger. I want her to get on her fucking knees and apologize for all the turbulent feelings she makes me suffer by.
She ruined my night.
I was fucking.
Blowing a girl's back just to lay off some steam. Get the stress of the college life off my shoulders.
But then, she just had to cock-block me.
My best friend’s sister.
Speaking of the twat, he dared to interrupt my one night stand for the sake of his bratty sister.
Usually, I love brats.
My type.
They make sex enjoyable. All the more pleasurable when they try to resist.
Keyword: try.
Because I know for a damn straight fact when a girl wants to be disciplined.
Fucked right and put in her place.
Reminds me of her. Y/L/N Y/N.
Except for one thing, though- she makes my fucking insides churn in all uncomfortable ways.
She doesn’t have a bratty attitude, the bitch has a bratty personality.
Yes, she is indeed a bitch. I can't stand a girl who's always annoying just because she feels like it. She'd never had a valid reason to hate me, and neither did I.
When I first met her, I mean.
She was laughing with her brother having breakfast one time when I came out of my room for painkillers and a glass of water.
Her brother and I were both freshmen in need of a dorm, and we agreed on splitting the rent once in a frat party.
Yes... we were both strangers to each other, but we clicked.
Met through mutuals, and our vibes matched. After living with each other for over six months now, we've grown pretty close.
He's cool, agreed on basic rules like who does the laundry or dishes, helped with assignments, and was always there when needed.
He's a friend. A close one.
A tolerable one.
That can't be said about a certain someone, though.
She scowled at me that day and later told me she didn't like my vibe when I confronted her about it.
Bullshit.
And yet, she's the reason I left a naked girl in my bed and came to this godforsaken club in the first place.
Her brother is here, too, which is why he called me to come pick her up. Said something about her being drunk, and since he had taken a shot or two as well, he couldn't take her home himself.
Or he just didn't want to, because he was also getting laid tonight.
That's proven to be right when I see him making out with a girl near the bathrooms.
His hands grope her all over as she arches into him, which is enough to make me look away.
Sly motherfucker.
Casting my vision toward the main dance floor, I scan the crowd for a short brunette with soft features.
Annoyingly soft features.
So soft that I want to corrupt her. Tear the bratty exterior and dig through the filthy dark side on the inside.
But those features aren't the only things that infuriate the hell out of me.
It's her innocence.
How can a brat be innocent, you may ask?
When my gaze lands on her, my jaw tenses in annoyance.
She sways her hips sensually, eyes closed and mouth open as she slides her hands down her body to a seductive beat following her movements.
I follow the action, eyes unable to tear away from her figure.
Her fingers skim over her neck down to her breasts and then further, the lightness she seems to be handling her body with attending to a grace she always breathed by.
Fuck, I hate this woman.
Hate everything about her.
How she moves.
How she walks.
How she fucking talks.
Runs her mouth like a brat who needs to be handled.
No- not like- is.
She is a brat.
A brat who's oblivious to all the eyes she's attracting.
Including mine.
Fuck.
Her dancing resumes as her eyes stay closed, feeling every beat.
She's enjoying herself.
Not for long.
I school my expression- which had turned into a scowl the moment I set my eyes on her- and begin my stride towards her.
I spot a man doing the same, but she's absolutely mind-numb as she continues to dance with her damn eyes closed.
I was irritated, but now I'm literally fed up.
He's a couple inches shorter than me, wearing a white tee and skinny ripped jeans.
Not to mention, his hair is slicked back by a disgusting amount of hair gel.
Ew.
He approaches Y/N with predatory eyes and a shit eating grin, his gaze set straight on her perky ass.
Which is just barely covered by the tight little dress she's wearing, inching higher and higher up her thighs as we speak.
My steps quicken when I see him reach out, apparently intending to slap her ass.
My blood boils.
White noise drowns out all available access to the outside world as I break out into a jog and reach her just in time.
My hand swiftly slides onto her tiny waist, and I glare at the man whose shit-eating grin is now gone, replaced with confusion.
Y/N's eyes stay closed as she giggles, and it's now I notice how drunk she is.
Bright crimson tints her cheeks and her breath smells of strong tequila, obviously from having taken too many shots.
Isn't she here with friends?
How could they leave her alone like this?
Her brother's here. Her brother is here.
My breath turns heavy, my heartbeat quickening. I have to stop myself from punching the douchebag in front of me into fucking oblivion because I don't know if i'll ever stop once I start.
Fuck.
I try to focus on anything besides her frame that's barely hanging onto me, all the exhaustion from her dancing catching up to her as she fights to keep her eyes open.
Why the fuck is she here all alone? Why did they- whoever she's here with, except her brother- leave her here like this?
Like she's not even aware of where she is.
Like she's not sober enough to be responsible.
Like she's not fucking strong enough to defend herself if anything happened to her.
I might punch a wall.
My grip tightens around her waist, which makes her drowsily lift her head to stare up at me.
She's still shorter than me with heels on, enough to put her neck in an uncomfortable position whenever she looks up at me.
It's adorable.
But that's none of my concerns as the slimy fuck keeps undressing her with his eyes. Makes me want to claw them out with my bare hands.
Repress.
"Wha..." She starts, growing more and more confused as she tries to wrap her head around where the hell she is. "Jungkook? What are you..."
She trails off into a mindfuck, allowing me to set my full focus on the man still staring between us with wariness.
My gaze hasn't worn off him since I saw him fucking reach for her ass, which makes me want to bash his head against the wall.
My breathing turns heavy again.
Repress.
"Off-limits." I bite out with enough to control to shock myself. I'm even more surprised that this motherfucker is still breathing.
His eyes thin into slits as he eyes me suspiciously. "I haven't seen you here the last couple of hours. Thought her sexy ass came alone." His eyes skim over her body, gaze lingering longer than necessary on her breasts.
Guess someone's leaving with no limbs tonight.
"You thought wrong." It takes almost all the last bits of my control to reply with that before I start turning around to leave, Y/N almost falling asleep on my arm.
She clutches the hem of my shirt with a weak grip, like a toddler would its mom.
If I couldn't get here in time, what would've happened?
I catch myself before I overthink it. If I did, I'm afraid I might commit a crime tonight. One of shameless blood and murder-
Repress.
My back is turned to him when I hear a low whistle, which makes me pause, angry enough for my limbs to shake with adrenaline.
"You know, It's often rare for a slut with such a sweet ass to be out here all alone wearing that. Almost like she's begging for a cock-"
The words are barely out of his mouth before my fist connects with his face. The force of my blow got him on the floor, nose fucked and bleeding. Might be broken.
Good. Bare minimum.
I almost straddle him and punch him to his fucking fortunate death.
Almost.
But I have to get Y/N home.
I can't stand this anymore.
I can't stand her anymore.
Coming here alone? Dressed like that?
I mean yes, she did come here with her idiot brother who thinks with his dick, but he's nowhere to be found.
How can someone be so nonchalant to just leave his sister here all alone?
I'm so goddamn confused.
And infuriated.
And...angry.
Fucking fuck.
I need to get her the fuck out of here before i lose my fucking mind.
Fuck me.
The punch I just delivered did little to satiate my thirst for this slimy fucker's blood.
But again, Y/N's more important.
I turn, my panic spiking so high it reaches levels it had never before when I find Y/N out of my sight.
My breathing starts to go abnormal for the nth time this night.
I might develop heart problems.
A sigh leaves my mouth when I spot her by the bars, trying to convince the bartender to give her another shot. Relief floods my system, and my breaths regulate.
I send a quick text the girl- who i already forgot the name of- and tell her to head home. She sends a crying emoji back but agrees nonetheless, telling me to call her back when everything is sorted out on my end.
I have other things to care for.
Or I guess, in this case, a certain person to tend to.
God, It's gonna be a long night.
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@hoseokteardrop @nochuel @kaitieskidmore97 @nays2112 @jksoftii @yu-justme @meadow-in-spring @bunnykoos @looneybleus @fushigurosdarling @alpha-mommy69 @junecat18 @xjiminsthighsx @tanniesdolls @winterbeartaehyungbestboy @whoa-jo @ahgasegotarmy116 @jksusawife @frgetmenotes @baechugff @partyparty-yah @army130613210521 @drugerlime @allisonstone @hopekive @llallaaa @tarahardcore @hopetookmysoul @betysotelo18 @harmonic55 @ecrvea @awesomebabyyoda @peterstarkchrishiddleston @pinkrockstar19 @sweetestseoul @luv--youu @mochminnie @coletaehyung @whitelies2248-blog @ash07128 @bangtans-momma @yourbobaeyestell
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hooned · 17 days
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NI-KI ⟡ Studio Choom 'Artist of the Month'
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waterghostype · 5 months
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masters of earth
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birues · 6 months
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"After all, the path I once walked is now yours to finish."
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rob-pattinson · 2 years
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VIOLA DAVIS 2022 | Marcos Florentino & Kelvin Yule ph. for ELLE Brasil
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stonergfd · 2 months
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put a collar on a boy for the first time last night... he humped my leg and whimpered while sucking on my tits.... and his nipples are so fucking sensitive I spent so long just pinching and biting them....
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riddlerosehearts · 5 months
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You know, I'm pretty sure I heard some singing on the hill next to us. In case you're interested.
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frogcupid · 10 months
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only wrecker could get away with this
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arcanegifs · 5 months
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Imagine Dragons & JID - Enemy Official Music Video "I'm hopin' that somebody pray for me I'm prayin' that somebody hope for me I'm stayin' where nobody 'posed to be p-p-posted Being a wreck of emotions Ready to go whenever, just let me know"
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freckleslikestars · 5 months
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FARSCAPE | 1.06 Thank God It's Friday, Again.
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rendevok · 2 years
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Still a trio after all this time 💗
[ID: A drawing of Miles Edgeworth, Larry Butz, and Phoenix Wright; both from the present and past. Near the top of the image the trio is posing for a photo; Larry, in the middle, is grinning widely, and leaning his elbows on the shoulders of the other two. Miles crosses his arms, looking toward his friends and scowling over the contact, Phoenix smiles fondly while observing the interaction. In the middle and lower half of the image, and superimposed over their older figures, is a picture of their younger selves in a very similar position. Young Larry is once again in the middle, leaning his arms on his friends’ shoulders, while young Miles opens his mouth in protest, and young Phoenix is again observing his friends and laughing with a open smile. End ID]
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markpakin · 3 months
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I'm going to give you one more chance.
WE BEST LOVE: FIGHTING MR 2ND (2021)
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