#this is why im unlovable lmfao

[flowers-that-sing]

help girl. i wish i was a computer so i could delete the BPD file

#bobbi babbling #ventpost #sorry. #i am actually fucking broken its insane lmao #imagine being so fucking worthless even your personality is wrong #HA i dont have to imagine #this is why im unlovable lmfao #im the worst person on earth #fucked up personality fucked up face fucked up body #im not smart fun loveable hot or fuckable so im worthless #nobody in the world is as awful as me #and nobody in the world will ever want me to be theirs totally and completely #i cant ever trust anybody and everything is horrible #i dont deserve to live #God probably hates me #everyone hates me

[strawberrystepmom]

when u love me u agree to also love my cat girl nature no matter what

#don’t look at me but why aren’t you looking at me #don’t talk to me but why aren’t you talking to me #im to be admired but do it LIKE THIS >:((((( #no wonder im unlovable LMFAO

[lightthatibecome]

.

#lmfao made the mistake of going onto bpdlovedones on reddit 🥰🥰 rly love being seen as some irredeemable unlovable unchangeable monster #like none of these people have ever had a good relationship with someone with bpd and theyre gonna lump all of us in together as abusers #like fucking seriously? okay guess all autistic ppl are abusers guess all ppl with did are abusers etc etc #also . im autistic and have did that's not me being a dick throwing ppl under the bus its just like. a comparison lol #its just like. jesus fucking christ. #i really really wish i wasnt like this theyre all acting like this is something we dont try to fix. like we want to live like this? #like we enjoy being this way. not like i put 1000% of myself into trying to do better every single day #and i have gotten better. i have changed. i dont always believe it but i have people who will be blunt and honest who tell me #in no uncertain terms that i mightve been something else before but ive changed for the better and continue to do so #honestly it just fucking hurts deeper than anything else rn like why tf did i do that 😊 bc i knew itd hurt my feelings #god i really really . dont want to be this i dont WANT to be a terrible person i fucking promise im trying. im doing better

[newtkive]

pixels [newt x reader - modern text au]

ch. 1 - the gc birth

in which two online friends navigate a romance through a minecraft groupchat with their stupid friends

or, newt, the quiet, stoic boy, and y/n, the bubbly girl both curse the world for keeping them apart, but at least they can send each other cute emojis and hope the other doesn't notice their blossoming feelings.

warnings: strong language, mutual pining, none really.

➥ m.list

__

notes: hi :p im very new to writing on tumblr (but ive always been a reader) so pls bare w me! and im trying to revert back to being 14 (im 23 lols..) so im revisiting my old favs including the maze runner/thomas (bc i binged the artful dodger and now im obsessed again). there will be non-text chapters in the future as well, when everyone eventually meets. this will be newt focused so enjoy !! also everyone is like a realistic age from 23 to 28

__

THE GLADE

[ 7:45 PM ]

alby added minho, y/n, newt, tommy, and gally

alby: Hello, guys.

minho: wtf is this

newt: uhhhh

tommy: hi :3

y/n: so this is why you asked me for my # in private

gally: i didn’t consent to this when i gave you my number

newt: don’t give strange men your number y/n

tommy: oh that’s y/n?

alby: Wait, Newt you had Y/N’s number already??

newt: yea

tommy: o.O

y/n: i gave it to him like two weeks after we met lmao

tommy: SO HE HAD YOUR NUMBER FOR A YEAR AND I DIDNT????

y/n: well he asked and you guys didn’t :p

newt: lmao

minho: ik he smug as fuck rn

not u asking for a girls number lmao simp

newt: stop

y/n: we all talk in discord anyways so i didn’t really think about it

plus you guys are friends irl so idk

it felt kinda weird to insert myself heh

minho: we’ve known you for a year and a half y/n

we play games all the time

call all the time

we even send packages and shit

you’re very much considered our irl friend

y/n: REALLY?? 🥺🥺

tommy: internet friends are real friends 😍❤️

minho: the heart eyes are crazy

but yes dude

newt: of course you’re our close friend. just cuz we live near each other and you’re a bit far away doesn’t mean we don’t adore you

minho: ADORE IS CRAZY LMFAO

but real ig

y/n: AWWWWW YOU GUYS LOVEEE MEEEEEE

hahahahha

HAHAHHAHJFIEKMGOR

I LVOE YOU GIYYYYSSSS IM PUTTING ALL OUR MINECRAFT BEDS TOGETHER LATER

gally: i do not want my bed to be infested by you guys

minho: gally sleeps in the corner

gally: no i dont i sleep in my mansion

y/n: cherry blossom mansion*

gally: and you sleep in a shed

y/n: cherry blossom shed* its pink and that matters.

tommy: love you y/n 😊🥰

y/n: love you tommy <3333

minho: that’s actually nasty stop now

y/n: u mad ur unloved

i love how the gc name is our minecraft town name :((

newt: aw it is

minho: can we talk about why tf this was made when we have a perfectly good discord

alby: I’m done with Discord.

newt: you got your shit hacked didn’t you mate

minho: mate 💀💀

british people so crazy

alby: Yes maybe..

I don’t want to make another.

y/n: or your old ass doesn’t know how to

minho: LMAO REAL

alby: Gonna ignore that. But I am getting too old for it. I have a new promotion at work so that means I won’t have time to play with you guys as much anymore. So I decided to make this groupchat in hopes to talk to you guys more to make up for it :)

minho: every group always has the old head with the job 💀💀

newt: minho admitting he’s jobless

minho: you work at a library be so fr rn

newt: i have an income. you have a room in your grandmas basement. we are not the same.

gally: LMFAOOOOOOO

minho: stfu :////

y/n: AWWWWWWW ALBYYYYYYY

tommy: YAAAY!!!!

im going to text you guys all day

tell you every meal

every thought

every interaction will be meaningful and glorious

newt: you are 24 years old you don’t have to do all that

minho: no fr im turning off my phone if he starts this shit

why not just do it before in the discord ??

tommy: easy access now and i tried before but stopped since no one really replied..

y/n: i say we all do it :D i will too tommy

newt: ok second thought that’s fine

minho: .

gally: that’s wild.

y/n: YAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!! NEWT YOU GO FIRST

newt: first with what

y/n: say what u ate today

newt: didn’t say i’d do it.

tommy: i ate muffin, monster energy drink, and hamburger :3333

you guys next

minho: that’s all you had bro..

y/n: hot cheetos and french fries and coffee :D

minho: ??????? BRO

how are you guys alive

y/n: it's my day off and no class so i just wanna rot in bed and that means no cooking

newt: please eat and drink water.

like for real and document it

y/n: ok wait

there

tommy: yum!

minho: y/n..

newt: cereal does not count

y/n: I DONT HAVE ENERGY TO MAKE ANYTHING OKAY

im a 23 year old broke college student my fridge is bare

newt: alright what do you want?

y/n: wym?

newt: like if you could pick.

minho: that’s so cruel 😭😭 just making her imagine it

i like it go on.

tommy: i want chick fil a

minho: i knew you hate the gays

tommy: I AM THE GAYS?????

y/n: ugh that does sound good

mmmm chickem sandiwh waffle fry I Want that Os mYch

newt: that’s what you would order?

y/n: mmmcm yeahshhhhh

newt: ok

minho: that’s it?

i thought soemthing would happen

tommy: me too

like a spell! magic 🪄

y/n: sigh

my cereal tastes bad now

newt: well it is cocoa puffs.

minho: L cereal

y/n: DTOP SAYING L ITS SO ANNOYITIGJNGGGGG

minho: she so madddd 😂😂 L

newt: you're annoying minho

minho: youre just saying that bc shes saying that

newt: no ive always said it. and i will continue to. youre fucking annoying

minho: who bought you your coffee yesterday

newt: ???

myself

and i paid for yours too

im the one with an income

minho: .

well i didnt think youd remember that well.

newt: it was literally yesterday.

minho: yeah but ur old

newt: IM THE SAME AGE AS YOU

minho: yeah but im 🤗✨ 26 ✨🤗and youre... 26😬😔

tommy: guys stop fighting

newt: we aren't fighting

maybe this gc was a bad idea

tommy: NO!!!!!!!!!

y/n: NOOOO!

tommy: this is like y/n is here w us irl

y/n: awwwwwwwwwwwwwww

minho: no it's not. we would smell a foul stench if she was

y/n: i ahte you sooo bad.

wait there is a knock at my door im scared

newt: answer it

minho: aren't you supposed to say don't open the door for strangers ????

newt: well usually yes

y/n: no im not expecting company

newt: just do it pls

y/n: ok :D

minho: bruh..

i hope she gets robbed and u feel bad forever newt

newt: why would you want that

minho: bc she owes me money

newt: YOU owe ME money

minho: yes but i have a good reason she just wanted robux

tommy: Y/N DONT DO IT!!! I HAVE SEEN DATELINE

y/n: :o....

tommy: Y/N?????????

OH GOD THEY GOT HER

minho: why would she text a silly face if she got got

tommy: clearly its a surprised face

maybe its not her

its like those cut out magazine letters murderers use

y/n: who got me chick fil a!!!!!!!!!!

minho: me

newt: you literally did not

minho: shut up

y/n: newt it was u i see ur name on the receipt

newt: well

y/n: :(

newt: what why are you sad?

minho: im hungry too

y/n: u spent ur money :(

newt: you're hungry are you not?

minho: she's not but i am

y/n: yeah but..

i feel bad you shouldn't have

newt: just eat it or i'll be mad

minho: i think i want red lobster

newt: it's really no big deal y/n

y/n: thank you newt :(((((

newt: you're welcome

go eat and watch ur show or smth

minho: i owuld love to eat and watch a show rn <33 ohhhh im starving

newt: can you shut up

gally: im muting this gc if this means i have to deal with your guys' shit more than usual now.

minho: thank god

newt: good

tommy: good

y/n: good

the food is good too <3

newt: good.

_

lmk if you want to be tagged!

#the maze runner #the maze runner fanfic #tmr #tmr newt #newt x reader #newt imagine #the maze runner newt x reader #the maze runner newt imagine #the maze runner newt #thomas brodie sangster #thomas brodie-sangster #thomas brodie sangster x reader #dylan o'brien #reader insert #text au #modern au #newt x reader au #fanfic #the maze runner imagine #newt tmr #thomas brodie-sangter x reader #hi #idk #reader is funny #kind of a self insert obvi #tbs #tbs x reader #tbs imagine #thomas the maze runner

[tchaikovskaya]

lol so altho ive come a long way in the last several years re: how my negative internal narrative (and especially expressing it to other people in a social context) affects other people, and i really dont do that anymore for many reasons, i feel like the whole "oh boohoo you feel unloved and needy and stupid and inadequate and invisible etc, and telling that to people is a you problem that makes all your emotional connections a burden on the other party" attitude is frankly crazy and counterproductive like why are u blaming people for feeling this way on a personal level when its either pervasive messaging that theyve fully internalized OR its intense trauma they clearly dont have the tools to work thru rn lmfao ???

im not saying that others have no right to cut off people who continue to express those feelings without any real change, bc that kind of shit is just cyclical and does absolutely zero parties involved any favors (i literally was that until very recently and have had people do so for it, and ive also recently been the person to cut a Stuck person out for my own good, im not judging ANYWAY)... but acting like people are wallowing in pity and self hatred for like. histrionic reasons is wildly dismissive hahahaha

#does any of this make sense

[fairycosmos]

I have a crush on u and it's actually making me kinda sad. its embarrassing, I don't know u, u don't know me. and there's not really a 'chill' way to begin conversation (not that u'd like me anyway, so no point, lol). I get internet crushes are embarrassing n stupid. but seeing how u respond to people alone, is enough for me to feel something u kno? it never fails to amaze me how attentive & present & thoughtful and deeply compassionate u are to each & every person. it's never dismissive in the slightest, and doesn't feel like ur attending to an 'audience' but actually just so attentive and in tune in the most resonant way with each person. u care. u have such a great capacity to empathise w others, to make people feel seen n heard. and it somehow seems effortless, and just undeniably genuine. you're special. please preserve this precious part of u.

awwww angel you are so so sincerely sweet <3 dw i get this for ppl online sometimes it's sort of a parasocial thing but then it's also about like. finding companionship and security and a sense of true appreciation for ppl online in the absence of having it IRL and i can totally understand how that can morph into some semblance of a crush if you get crushes on people quickly. i really really appreciate it and am so deeply flattered for real <3 esp with how fucking unloveable i feel all the fucking time lmfao!! the thing is i know it's soooo cliche but i think it's just easy to read me that way on here when in reality i am just straight up not that emotionally or physically desirable - and u would get over it quickly if you knew me, i absolutely promise lmfao. anyway it's prob cringe and unhealthy but yeah i Absolutely do care ab the ppl who make an effort to interact with me and open up to me on here and i find a lot of solace in knowing im not the only one who is severely mentally ill and struggling lmfao. i very much want people to feel seen and heard like i rmr when i was 16 and people first started telling me ab their lives on here and i was like Well i know how shit it is to feel unacknowledged and if i can give that to this person through my silly little blog why fucking not - whether it resonates with them or not, whether able to solve anything for them or not. i don't think it's anything particularly special, in fact i think a lot of people feel the same on here which is why we're often so open and vulnerable with each other, but yeah i am just another person trying my best. and this blog has been a massive comfort to my during a time where i have been genuinely entirely emotionally isolated and honestly not reading reality correctly or healthily - i know i still don't. i'm like not right in the head in a way that isn't easy to explain away and i know a lot of people on here are too (lmfao sounds like shade but i mean it earnestly.) so i think it's a two way street and i appreciate the ppl who keep up with me and who i keep up with a lot, prob more than i can articulate. i do make the effort to not be dismissive and i really adore you for seeing that and being truly kind about it. ab the feeling of having a crush - again, i am seriously so flattered and blushing and screaming inside at the absolute compliment lmfao. if ur ever in a place where you want to get to know someone (and obviously ur around my age and you think we'd get along well) - hey my dms are open!! i'd love to know ya and keep up with you too. MWAH <3

#anon #thinks ab this eternally and writes it on my grave

[drops-of-universe]

I promise you, you’re not unloveable. That title has been mine since birth. You’re precious, pure of heart, diabolically beautiful, and poetry t flows through your soul. You’re adored, and I know your friends and family love you to death.

Ummmmmm why is this more encouraging and genuine than anything people i love has ever said to me lmfao 🥺🥺🥺 godddd i cant believe someone out there thinks so sweetly of me especially based on this blog asdfghjkjhg 🥺🥺🥺 which is becoming mental illness city more and more due to the state i’m in……it honestly makes me feel so warm and loved and Seen in a way that i can never bring myself to seek out irl...im forever indebted to the ppl that take time out of their lives to send me encouraging words. thank you so so much, you must know i think you’re infinitely cool and lovely too ♥️♥️♥️

[suenitos]

NOVITO I DON'T THINK U UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY YOUVE MADE ME I'VE LOOKING FAR AND WIDE FOR THAT SERIES FOR AGEEEEES it was my first dnf fic!!!!!! i read it while it was posting!!!!! idk why i had a very wrong idea of the authors urls and only remembered the "hand in unloveable hand" title but i just COULDNT find it, for three whole years after reading it, cause i never bookmarked it. i'm literally so fucking happy LMFAO its a little over the top but i just really thought it left us!!!

YAYYYYY IM SO HAPPY FORYOUUUU i dont think its over the top at all! im also super happy its still with us apparently i only bookmarked the series in march of this year probably because i was looking to see if it still existed lol. also apparently i didnt read the last part of the series and reading that hurt BADDDD T_T no way it was your first dnf fic though thats a really amazing one to start off with wow

#i think mine literally WAS heatwaves! and some of the earliest ones ive read were the pygmalion piece of clay one an unfinished royal au and #like 7 days in florida or whatever it was called.... waht a time... but i was FLOORED when i found this one.. really really good #🌟.txt #ask.txt

[mutuallyassured]

some muses im thinkin of adding, lol

ramona vega (jlo's character from hustlers lmao)

christopher moltisanti

tony soprano

annie january / starlight

talia al ghul (basically headcanon-inspired bc canon is tragique)

lara croft (once im finished w the survivor trilogy!)

jack marston

charles smith

claire redfield

levi & dina from tlou2

stu macher

amber freeman (seems i have a thing for gay murderers)

amy elliot-dunne or nick dunne (this is my not-so-silent plea for someone to write either of them bc i dont think i'd want to interact w most other charas outside of each other - give me that Hand In Unlovable hand content PLEASE)

allyson strode-nelson (another not-so-silent plea for someone to write michael or for someone to write allyson w my michael lmao rip)

margot verger (my slightly book-inspired former drag king trans masc margot... why r bryan fuller n thomas harris such messes lmfao)

(femboy) charles lee ray (u already kno im trying to write chiffany so what's up)

what do we think... any1 have any suggestions or recs? even when it comes to movies/books... always looking for new content!

#OUT. #should get back to doing my job but deflecting my anxiety abt flying on an airplane for the first time tmrw w this instead! #WISHLIST.

[lorisystem]

Like its been only 2 sessions weve been actively working on toxic shame with EMDR (without counting times where i just talked about it) and it just feels so difficult and like were basically just scratching the surface. Which makes sense like its not gonna be healed so quickly but damn.

My therapist is so funny cause it took a while for her to understand why i felt that way- probably because i stay vague on what makes me feel that way (partly i just dont know exactly and also specific things like being queer that im not ready to disclose yet)

So its just like "what makes you feel like youre unlovable and people are out to harm you if they find out your true nature" n im like "lets see. every aspect of my life" lmfao

Which- granted, isnt helpful..

Also since i feel like im actively worsening it daily by forcing myselves to conform etc at work.

- Ravolia

#volia #raven #lorisys

[chainedtothedarkness]

im sick of feeling so stupidly heartbroken though like literally i already knew everything and i knew im not what they want at all so lije can i please fuckingvBreaking and Shattering any tine u see them talk about what they Do want

im literally unlovable , everyone deseeves someone healthy and alive, theres nothing here for anyone. loving me would be literal torture. idk why it hurts so bad fjjfjf maybe its too soon after realizing wietse isnt coming back? is that twice the proof of how unsuitable and inadequate i am?? maybe. its make sensebig but its ridiculous the sheer physical pain i feel at everyrhing the say jxhdhd like yeah dorry im not a woman and not pretty and not sexy and not healthy and not anazing and not cool and not strong and not nearby and literally nor anything good, just hope you do find what you want someday yknow

meanwhile ive long acceptwd my fate jdjdfjdj i alrwady knew id never be loved romantically long term around 2010, i literally gave up on love back then (much to monica feeling upset every time i shot down any notion of ever having a bf in the future), wierse was literally an exception to the rule and ive also only become more and more fucked up as time has gone, im not going to trust anyone that way after this past year lmfao

that person is an exception thwnselves bx theyve kniwn me while everything has happened and gottwn it all firsthand, im not going to open up abt all this ever again lmao

plus even current "close" friends i hardly trust most of them fjjfj pm wveryone has betrayed my trust and hurt me at some point or another so i never feel Safe with them

and thats my requirwment to fall lmfao i have to bevable to Trust and feel Safe

so in short a romantic relationship is never gonna happen after this lmao not with my endless trauma and teust issues and demiromantic nature

not to mention the sheer hell of knowing me and caring about me jfjfjf no one deserves that burden either

[shomouno]

when you think something someone's said to you stopped effecting you but then you see their name and it's like lol nevermind

#hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm #thanks for ruining my ability to even be myself and my entire self esteem lmfao #but nope!! it's good!!!!! not like you didnt hurt me and others in the process!!!!!!!!!!! all that matters is you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #holier art thou #cdjfjrjfijrf i wanne diiiiiiiie but thanks #im an awful person unlovable unlikeable dab on it if you mcfuckin AGREE mates #:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) #why do people even talk to me lmfao like why do you do that to yourselves

[maroon5-official]

.

#dni #dni pls #honestly pls ignore these #lmfao im pathetic ignore me pls #please ignore #im jist so incredibly pathetic #im so unloveable #so unlikeable #im only a fat bitch #barely worth the time of day #why am i so afraid to die why cant i just end it

[babyboibucky]

IM SO GREEDY I KNOW 😭😭😭😭😭 but i just thought of 🖋 with ""you deserve to be loved, without having to hide the parts of yourself that you think are unloveable" SKSKSKSKD THIS IS WHY YOU MIGHT WANNA CONSIDER UNFOLLOWING AND BLOCKING ME KKHFFJJGFKFKKFFD

Okay here it is lmao technically this is a roommates AU with Chubby!Bucky BECAUSE I KNOW YOU LOVE HIM 🥰

THIS GOT SUPER LONG WTF I’M SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY LMFAO

It was past midnight when Bucky found you sitting in the shared kitchen, alone and in the dark. He carefully approached you, not wanting to scare you with his presence.

“I thought you were out.” He said, pulling a stool and sitting across from you.

You looked up and forced a smile, “Should ask you the same thing. I thought you went out with Sam and Sharon.” You responded.

Bucky shrugged, fiddling with the pack of gummy bears on top of the table. “You know clubs aren’t my thing. Besides, it’s a chance to get some peace and quiet in here. You know how they are when they’re here.” Bucky said, hoping to get a genuine chuckle from you.

Unfortunately, his quip didn’t seem to work seeing that you only responded with a small smile. He’d never seen you like this, so down and quiet. You were always bubbly and loud, spitting jokes and just...happy. He knew you were supposed to be out with a guy you’ve been exclusively dating, so in a way, he assumed that something must have happened.

“Gummy bear for your thoughts?” Bucky asked, taking one red gummy bear— your favorite— from the pack.

This time, you managed to let out a genuine laugh. You looked at Bucky and smiled at him, taking the gummy bear from his palm and then popping it into your mouth. It took you a few seconds to speak up and Bucky patiently waited, he didn’t even force you to say anything.

“Is there something wrong with me?” You blurted out.

Bucky frowned, “Why would you even ask that?”

You shrugged, “John dumped me...for his ex. It’s just that none of my relationships seem to last because of me.”

“Woah now, I don’t think none of it is your fault. John is a douche, it’s his loss not yours. Good riddance, in fact. Never liked him.”

Bucky froze when he realized how much he had to say about John. Truth was, Bucky admired you...he liked you so it was beyond him why the guys you dated would even dump you.

Letting out a sigh, you shrugged again. “I feel like I’m not enough, you know? I mean...ugh, I’m sorry I’m being dramatic here. But you bribed me with a gummy bear so now you have to sit through this shit I’m about to say.” You laughed.

Bucky slid over the entire pack of gummy bears over to you, “If that’s the case then this is all yours. I’ve got all night to listen.”

You blushed at Bucky’s statement and had to compose yourself before letting it all out. You’ve always been confident but ever since you noticed a certain pattern in your dating history, you couldn’t help but question yourself. It’s either the guys you dated would dump you for a new girl or go back to their exes.

Bucky listened to you intently and never even interrupted you. He just sat there, acknowledging you and your emotional outburst.

“John said he wasn’t ready for a commitment, that’s why we decided to casually date for the mean time. And then this afternoon he just said that he wanted to end shit because his ex came back, trying to fix their fucking relationship. I mean, am I not worth committing to? Am I just not...worth lov—“

“Don’t even say it.” Bucky warned, leaning forward on the table.

“You’re beautiful and smart. On top of that, you’re hella funny! Those guys are just blind not to appreciate what they have in front of them. You’re absolutely perfect just the way you are, I know it sounds cheesy as fuck but I’m telling the truth.”

You pursed your lips because it was the first time that someone told you something that you truly felt was sincere. Genuine. You could feel the tears coming and as much as you hated crying, you weren’t able to hold back the tear that slipped.

“Don’t even dare compare yourself to anyone. You’re just...you. And that’s what makes you so easy to love. Fuck John and those other guys who didn’t see that. I know I do.” Bucky said, reaching out to wipe away your tears with his thumb.

You sniffed, “What do you mean...you do?” You asked.

It was Bucky’s turn to blush at his sudden confession. “I uh...might have been...in love with you...?”

You made a face, “Why didn’t you tell me?” You asked.

Bucky rolled his eyes before standing up, “I mean...look at this.” He said, motioning over to his body, his shirt clinging tightly over his pudgy stomach.

“I’m not that attractive. I felt like someone like you deserves someone better.” He admitted and sat back down.

“I can’t believe you’re saying that after the speech you just gave me, Bucky.” You explained.

“You’re a good guy, Buck. The kindest I know. And you’re cute and you know me better than myself. We’ve been living under the same roof for what, almost five years now? And you always took care of me. Don’t think I never noticed, I always did.” You confessed.

And then it hit you like a big yellow school bus. You’ve been trying to better yourself for the other guys you’ve dated. And by better, it meant changing yourself. Not entirely, but still. Some of your habits or mannerisms, sometimes they made others uncomfortable. The way you’d laugh out loud, you often try hard not to do so, afraid that it might turn off your date.

All this time, you’ve been the realest with Bucky. And he accepted you, all of you without exceptions. In fact, Bucky felt the same way with you. He never felt embarrassed about himself whenever the both of you hung out together. You lifted him up, always gave him compliments and even helped him out pick his clothes.

“I might have realized something.” You said

“And that is?” Bucky asked curiously.

“Maybe we deserve each other.” You softly said and the smile that Bucky gave you felt like the beginning of something.

Bucky nodded, “Maybe we do. Should we...you know...try this thing?” He asked, taking your hand in his to play with your fingers.

You laced your fingers with him, “I’d love to.” You said.

“But I think we should buy a new pack of gummy bears for Sam first, he’s gonna kick our asses if he sees we finished everything up.”

#bbb writes #bbb fic prompts #WTF THIS GOT LONG #sorry for the sloppy writing wifey lmao

[sukirichi]

🗣🗣TEAM NAOYA TEAM NAOYA (for earned it)

did satoru really expect y/n to be safe and sound when he transferred THAT huge amount of money to her account?? he said he left to protect her but he didn’t give her any type of closure, not even a text message saying they were done...he straight up ghosted her. the least he could do besides giving a closure would have been keeping an eye (maybe not him directly, but one of his most loyal men) on her, in order to prevent shit like the assault the day she went to the bank.

People were already speculating that his weakness was a girl and if that man from not a so powerful clan from ch.2 managed to get all those pictures of y/n then what make him think people from different clans or even just people who were involved in his world wouldn’t try to find his the rumour of the existence of y/n was true...like he might be the most powerful men but the bitch is kinda dumb

As for Naoya, mc said she’ll still be alive until she’s useful to Naoya but I do think maybe it’s just me that he cares for mc because he’s showing a softer side to mc only. Yes, he wants the power and to control people but if he really wanted y/n just for his brain and bc of the toji situation, then wouldn’t it be easier to keep her as a prisoner and not as a trophy wife (my dream😋)

Cant wait for the next chapters

ps. when you said the story would be angsty, do you mean for satoru right? i want for reader x naoya a happy ending (as much as it could be happy in the type of world they live in)

THIS ASK OMG WAIT IM GONNA GO ON A ROLL AND *RANT* MIGHT NEED THE KEEP READING TAB LMFAO okay let’s talk about Earned It Satoru’s character because HAHAAHAHA he’s got to be one of the most difficult people I’ve had to characterize for this (this is mostly a character analysis, slight spoilerssss, I guess??)

did satoru really expect y/n to be safe and sound when he transferred THAT huge amount of money to her account?? he said he left to protect her but he didn’t give her any type of closure, not even a text message saying they were done...he straight up ghosted her. the least he could do besides giving a closure would have been keeping an eye (maybe not him directly, but one of his most loyal men) on her, in order to prevent shit like the assault the day she went to the bank.

this one is just a huge YESSS and shows a lot about Satoru. So it’s not really a HUGE spoiler but we can all tell Satoru was REALLY overconfident and he’s gotten so reliant on his status, power, influence that he doesn’t really think much about his actions. He’s impulsive and thinks he’s always doing the right thing (he’s not LMAO) and yes exactly! Dude didn’t even give her closure because he really thought he was being a hero, but it’ll show in future chapters how he’d developed in the past seven years and maybe we’ll even get a little sneak peeks of why he’s like this. Yeah, Satoru did NOT think about what could happen at all after he left! In his mind he was focused on “protecting” reader, but as mentioned in chapter one, he’s a super insecure person too that one of the reasons he left is because he didn’t want reader to view him as “unloveable” and he wanted to preserve that. I guess you could say he’s a man child. And LMFAO yes, he could’ve had someone keep an eye on reader, it won’t be a bother to him tbh, but it’ll be explained in future chapters on how he’s realizing the graveness of everything he’s done and how he reacts to it.

People were already speculating that his weakness was a girl and if that man from not a so powerful clan from ch.2 managed to get all those pictures of y/n then what make him think people from different clans or even just people who were involved in his world wouldn’t try to find his the rumour of the existence of y/n was true...like he might be the most powerful men but the bitch is kinda dumb

OKAY SO ABOUT THIS, IT SHOWED THE WEAK CHAIN IN SATORU’S THOUGHT PROCESSES. I really wanted to create a character who is strong and capable of a lot of things, but they’re very...hollow, you could say on the inside, undeveloped. Out of all the characters in this series, Satoru has to be the one who is falling behind in terms of maturity, he’s got a lot to learn. Meanwhile, I’d say the most developed is Naoya, and reader is mostly in the middle. also omg yes! actually the thing is, before the appearance of Naoya, the Gojo clan was considered the biggest and strongest mafia family out there. Their enemies who’d wound up hearing about Satoru’s “weakness” wasn’t going for the offense, they were trying to fish out information because considering Satoru’s defenses, they would do a lot better in learning more than full on using his weakness against him. This was where he failed because he was so confident of everything that he’d forgotten he wasn’t omnipotent - there will be eyes and ears everywhere. Honestly, Reader lasted a long relationship with him and she most definitely could’ve been hurt a long time ago, but it was Satoru’s presence next to her that kept her safe all this time. I mean, DUH, but ofc he doesn’t get that. YES HE’S DUMB THAT’S A FACT HAHAHAHAHA but don’t worry, maybe I’ll write a redemption arc for him HAHAHAHHA. the dude he killed in chapter one, the one who got pictures of reader and satoru, he wasn’t there to hurt reader or satoru at all, he knew he was going to lose, but he symbolized as one of the eventual cracks in Satoru’s plans that soon escalated into a full on downfall and he’s done his job well in taunting Gojo, pushing his weakness without direct contact, and hitting him right where it hurts. Clue: Gojo’s real weakness isn’t Reader! It may look like she is but he’s got a lot more issues than that lmfao 

As for Naoya, mc said she’ll still be alive until she’s useful to Naoya but I do think maybe it’s just me that he cares for mc because he’s showing a softer side to mc only. Yes, he wants the power and to control people but if he really wanted y/n just for his brain and bc of the toji situation, then wouldn’t it be easier to keep her as a prisoner and not as a trophy wife (my dream😋)

I AM CONFLICTED. PART OF ME WANTS TO RESPOND AS THE AUTHOR OF EARNED IT, BUT THE BIGGER PART OF ME WANTS TO SCREAM AS A CERTIFIED NAOYA SIMP BECAUSE PLEASE I’D NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT HIM. Also this isn’t a spoiler so it’s cool if I say this, but Naoya does care for Reader! The only question is why and to what extent. YES OMG I’VE ACTUALLY CONSIDERED THAT WHAT IF READER WAS JUST IMPRISONED BY NAOYA (and he totally could!) but nooo he actually gave reader so many opportunities to get back on her feet and he was there THE. WHOLE. TIME. Honestly though, I still wouldn’t 100% vouch for Naoya, I know he is toxic in his own way and we’re still just getting to his true nature. AS A TROPHY WIFE YES, WELCOME TO THE CLUB, WE’RE GONNA BE THE “NAOYA’S TROPHY WIVES” AND HE’S GONNA MAKE US OUR HAREM LMFAO SIGN ME UP 

ps. when you said the story would be angsty, do you mean for satoru right? i want for reader x naoya a happy ending (as much as it could be happy in the type of world they live in)

I meant EVERYTHING would be angsty, no parties are safe here! I want everyone to crumble and be hurt as much as possible because the only way to ever push someone into evolution is to make sure they’re cornered into a point of extinction or a really threatening situation first. Damn, I sound like a sci-fi movie villain but anyways, as for that happy ending HMMMM we’ll see about it! Looking at the ending I’ve planned out, I don’t know what to feel about it SPSPSPSP but aww I’m so very glad you guys like Naoya! it’s not my intention to make him the better one out of Satoru though (ALTHOUGH HE IS) because the spotlight will still be between Gojo and Reader, Naoya is more like a supporting character but he does have his own beauty! 

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THIS ASK IM SO HAPPY TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO SEND ME THIS I’M SO FLATTERED THAT YOU LIKED THE STORIES AND I’M JUST...IM ON CLOUD NINE UWU, THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE, I HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE DAY!!! LOVE YOU BUBSS 💕💕💕

#asks with naoya's trophy wife

[fairycosmos]

hey um. You talk about being inherently unlovable and unlikable a lot and I know this won’t change anything but like.... you really do seem to be such an amazing person whose (of course this is based off of the slice of your personality from ur blog) like there are ppl who suck (mostly bc they are fascists) but you aren’t a fascist and um I think you are a cool person and I love u. So

ummmmm why is this more encouraging and genuine than anything my family has ever said to me lmfao 🥺🥺🥺 godddd i cant believe someone out there thinks so sweetly of me especially based on this blog asdfghjkjhg 🥺🥺🥺 which is becoming mental illness city more and more due to the state i’m in……it honestly makes me feel so warm and loved and Seen in a way that i can never bring myself to seek out irl. most ppl are really sweet on here so i try to give that energy back u know…..im forever indebted to the ppl that take time out of their lives to send me encouraging words. thank you so so much, you must know i think you’re infinitely cool and lovely too ❤️❤️❤️ and NO ur right i am not a fascist in fact i’d quite like 2 guillotine some with you uwu…..anywayz i love u

#anon #<3