#they both dealing with their issues in different ways

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

Eventually I might write an entire thesis on all the ways Tech shows that he loves and cares deeply about his family; but for now, here's a slightly shorter essay focusing on how Tech dealt with Echo's departure in "The Crossing." 

One of the main themes of this episode is how different people deal with loss/goodbyes, and this is illustrated particularly well by the contrast between Omega and Tech (Hunter and Wrecker are basically the middle ground). Omega, of course, is vocal about how much she misses Echo and initially misinterprets Tech's attitude as him "not caring" that "everything's changing," but it's precisely Tech's attitude and actions that show how much he DOES care.

Tech is fully aware of Echo's absence

Tech relays right away that Echo's comms are off - meaning he had to have been in contact with Echo (or at least tried to contact him) since their parting. He is also the first to propose that the assignments for the mission might need to be adjusted due to Echo's absence leaving them "one man down."

Tech compartmentalizes Echo's departure within the same framework as Crosshair's departure.

I'm inclined to believe he does this because this is how he's able to accept this specific type of change. Of course there are differences between the two - one of which being that Crosshair left on barely civil terms after making it clear he had a hard time accepting that the squad could have different life goals/opinions without being enemies, while Echo left on good terms and made it clear he'd return - but ultimately both brothers left because the pull to pursue a different objective was greater than the call to stay with the family. And while Tech later admits this "can be difficult to understand" - which is likely why he acts as he does at other points in the episode - he understands and respects their decisions at least well enough to know he needs to carry on.

Tech is extra tetchy with the others for most of the episode - and this is NOT typical for him.

Tech has always been dry and blunt, sometimes seemingly emotionless ("seemingly" being the operative word), and he's not shy in expressing his opinions; but rarely has he ever crossed the line into being rude and blatantly argumentative with his squadmates as he is here. For example: in "Aftermath," Wrecker and Tech have a brief exchange during the battle simulation where Tech points out that maybe Wrecker should learn the hand signals and Wrecker gets a touch defensive; but rather than the issue blowing up into a major disagreement, Tech translates the hand signals for Wrecker and they move on. In "The Crossing," however, Tech gets irritated that Wrecker didn't notice the Marauder being stolen, and he just won't let it go. He then gets a bit sharp with Omega when she presses the subject of Echo's departure, telling her "What is your issue?" (He might have inadvertently said borderline insensitive things before, like "Perhaps the situation is not as dire as described. Children often overreact"; but as far as we've seen he has never singled out Omega as the subject of these observations and has never been curt with her.)

Omega, of course, gets frustrated with Tech, primarily because she doesn't see Tech's behavior for what it is: an indication that Tech feels the loss just as much as she does, even if he doesn't express it the same way.

Tech accepts Hunter's and Wrecker's criticism that he has handled things poorly with Omega, and when she finally tells him exactly what is bothering her about his behavior, he takes the time to put his feelings into words

Tech has been more irritable than usual, but he still cares about his family enough to notice when he's gone too far, accept correction, and do his best to smooth things over. He doesn't quite seem to know at first how to approach the topic with Omega so things can be smoothed over; but when she opens up to him, he is silent for a long time as he ponders how best to explain himself to her, rather than brushing aside and avoiding what is obviously a difficult conversation for him but an important one for her.

And thus we get one of my top favorite scenes along with one of my top favorite quotes in the entire Star Wars franchise:

"Echo chose a different path, as did Crosshair. I have to respect their decision. Even though it can be difficult to understand, we must carry on. I may process moments and thoughts differently, but it does not mean that I feel any less than you."

#tbb #the bad batch #star wars #star wars the bad batch #tbb omega #tbb tech #tbb analysis #i literally cannot express how much i adore this episode #so instead i'm going to write a character analysis

[sebastuyork]

Does "narcissist abuse" exist?

Well, I'll try to think of this as unbiased as possible.

Narcissist and Abuser are not synonymous. Many narcissists make an effort to not harm others and have never been or are currently not abusers.

NPD is a disorder with different presentations and sufferers have differents traits and severities: some narcissists are aggressive and external; some are more internal; some may be concerned with being a good person; some may overcompensate for their narcissism; some may take out the issues of their disorder on others; some may have trouble self-reflecting and hurt others; some may never hurt anyone; some may know how to deal with their traits while others may not.

NPD is a disorder that impacts both the sufferer and the people around them. It is important to talk about the sufferer, but also to acknowledge that it affects others as well. Especially if someone is untreated and unaware of their disorder.

It can cause someone to hurt others if it is left unchecked, if they were taught to hurt others, if they are unaware of their behavior, if they lack self-control, or if they simply have no desire to be a good person.

An abuser with NPD's reasons and ways of abusing someone may be different, just as an abuser with autism's would...and an abuser with depression, an abuser with bipolar, an abuser with schizophrenia, or an abuser who is not mentally ill at all.

I have heard a story about a woman with schizophrenia who was convinced her children were possessed by the devil and tried to attack them. Does this mean everyone with schizophrenia is dangerous? No. Absolutely not. Did her disorder affect the way she treated others in a negative way? Yes, because it presented in this way, and she was completely unaware and untreated. She is a victim in the fact she was dealing with these delusions and this fear, just as her children were victims for having to deal with the way she acted. Again: someone being schizophrenic does not mean they will hurt you. If someone who is schizophrenic tries to hurt you, that isn't representative of everyone with schizophrenia. (Many people with schizophrenia do not try to harm people at all.)

I also heard about the difficulties of a child living with bipolar mother who treated her disorder with alcohol, causing her to accidentally harm her child in many ways. Obviously, her disorder and addiction are relevant in talking about the experience, but we all know people with bipolar disorder are not abusers just because they are bipolar; and addicts are not abusers just because they are addicts.

Abuse can be done on accident, especially if someone was raised around it or thinking it was okay, or if they have a disorder affecting how they see things. In some cases, explaining and trying to help people realize their behavior can work. In others, it won't; some people don't want to listen or get better. If thats the case, thats on them. But no matter what, abuse is a choice. It can be done without awareness; but it is still a choice.

Anyone can be an abuser, and the equation of one disorder with abuse is not only dehumanizing to the people with this disorder, but can actually hurt victims of abusers who aren't narcissists, or victims who are narcissists.

My point is that it can be relevant to say your abuser had NPD. But someone being an abuser doesn't mean they are a narcissist, and the NPD isn't what needs highlighted...its the abuse. Yes, you can say your abuser had NPD, I don't think it's wrong to make a space to discuss this with people who had a similar experience either.

Many people in my family are narcissists/narcissistic, and quite a few of them hurt people or have been abusive. So I won't deny that a lot of narcissists (especially ones who externalize their narcissism and who are completely untreated, also when they refuse to admit they have a problem) treat others badly. I also know some of them don't actually have bad intentions and that others do have (in a way) bad intentions. Some were raised to think it was okay. I also know of narcissists who internalize it, who are aware of their narcissism, who do their best to not hurt others, who are victims themselves.

NPD should be talked about from the perspective of people with NPD, but this doesn't mean people who dealt with abusive people with NPD can't talk about it. As I said, I had no problem with an article about an abusive mother who had bipolar disorder; it was relevant.

A lot of "narcissistic abuse" described is just abuse. A list of abusive behaviors doesn't need to say narcissist at the top. It is completely irrelevant. Say it if it is relevant.

---

TLDR; Your abuser being a narcissist can be relevant, and you can talk about it, narcissists can be abusers and their disorder can play a part in it. But not all narcissists are abusers, and "narcissist" is equated with abuser. This is why people do not like the term "narcissistic abuse." It, in a way, equates narcissism with abuse. "Narcissistic abuse" is as real as "autistic abuse" or "bipolar abuse."

Don't use narcissist as a word for abuser. Say it if it's relevant.

I have no problem with a subreddit, therapy group, or community for people who dealt with abusive narcissists, but I want people to not perpetuate a stigma.

I sympathize with those who were abused, but narcissism isn't abuse; abuse is abuse. Narcissism can play a part, but that is not what the abuse is, and that is not THE cause of the abuse.

Abuse is abuse, and anyone can abuse.

#not art #narcissist abuse #npd safe #narcissistic abuse #I find just saying something is ableist doesnt explain anything so I went ahead and wrote too much #txt #anyways ill post silly things again soon

[ultimateloserboy]

thinking about duck dhmis having health issues and not even knowing it. first of all, he has diabetes, which you could say is just a joke, but i dont really think so. id say it would be if yellow guy didnt bring it up again a minute later in electricity where it was confirmed. sure hes talking to a different character, but his immediate assumption when someone is acting strange is to assume their blood sugar is low. i might be stretching- but to me it implies hes been in this situation before. charged yellow guy doesnt become smarter out of nowhere, he simply understands his already existing memories better, meaning he wouldve already known what low blood sugar was and how to deal with it before his batteries getting replaced. this implies to me that yellow guy has helped duck with his low blood sugar before, though i dont think him or duck actually understands whats going on. im not a diabetes expert or anything, but i know that low blood sugar is not nice, and you feel much better after grabbing a snack. which is funny, because in the past the creators have really driven it home that duck enjoys sweets and just food in general. in the “Its Nice That” QNA back in like 2016, half of ducks answers were about snacks and foods he liked. he said he finds yogurt exciting, and that his blood type is cream, etc. again, maybe im stretching, but it makes sense for him to enjoy these foods so much, because they’d probably make him feel better even if he doesn’t understand why. he probs thinks he just really fucking likes yogurt but in reality his blood sugar is literal ass.

moving on though, in the death episode he mentions forgetting to drink water, which is the cause of his literal death. dehydration is not a nice feeling, and its canon that the puppets experience pain like we do to an extent, so how long was duck feeling miserable without noticing? when the coffin cuts his finger he doesnt react at all, saying it “doesnt hurt that much” but pain is pain even if its small. he didnt even flinch to his finger being cut off. i dont think its the pain thats small, i think his pain tolerance is just too high for his own good. he probably didnt notice the pain of dehydration, or the pains of low blood pressure, or the pain of his insides being removed. he felt it, but he just didnt register how bad it really was. when he sees yellow guy being tore up in jobs he starts freaking out, obviously understanding that it must hurt, but if he was in the same situation he would be laughing. it makes me kind of sad in a way

there’s three ways i think this can be interpreted:

1: hes so desensitized to his own pain after eternity of being ripped apart that he doesnt even register when hes in pain anymore

2: hes so determined to be big and strong (like the military) that he refuses to acknowledge his pain because its a weakness he needs to get over

or 3: a mixture of both that is so bad it causes him to literally die of his own self-neglect. and even when his body tries to shut down and rest(die), he still refuses even that.

(plus, to add on to my runt-duck post, runts often have life-long health issues if they do live past infancy. i will die on the runt-duck hill. he is just like me.)

#‘what do you mean living isnt supposed to hurt? of course it is!’ #‘its a war and im winning!’ (in excruciating pain but will not admit it/thinks its normal) #dhmis duck #duck dhmis #duck guy #dont hug me im scared #dhmis analysis #dhmis tv series #dhmis tv show #dhmis theory

[a-b-riddle]

Good lord, if I ain’t kickin and screamin over the “can’t stop thinking about” series like oh my goddddd

Just the way that reader is dealing with each one of the guys, the different ways she has to reach into their chests and pull their hearts out one by one; lettin them know that they done fucked up in a way that she ain’t taking layin down and just hfkwkfndnks

AND SIMON AT THE END OF THE LAST CHAPTER SIR SIR HOW LONG WERE YOU FOLLOWIN HER??? DID JOHNNY TELL YOU??? SIR???

Anyways, I hope you’re having a wonderful day and that when you go to sleep your pillow is cool on both sides and such :D

I wanted to give them all “issues” that could be worked on. The way John speaks to her, Johnny’s lack of aftercare and Gaz not spending enough quality time and substituting it with gifts.

[chloesimaginationthings]

Mike VS Vanessa in the FNAF movie

#myart #chloesimagination #doodles #mike schmidt #vanessa fnaf #vanessa afton #fnaf foxy #golden freddy #fnaf #fnaf movie #fnaf fanart #five nights at freddy's #they both dealing with their issues in different ways #Mike wants to sleep and gloom #while Vanessa wants to party #I love them both the besties ever

[pansyfemme]

i mean. if people are uncomfortable with main characters cheating in fiction i do need to clarify that the ocs i draw all the time. do cheat on eachother. that is a main part of their storyline. so you do you but just know that is something that goes on

#also lots of semi-manipulative public mental health episodes #they do get help and work things out and re-establish bounderies #and a lot of the cheating is closer described as non properly established polyamory guidlines but over time they do find ways to deal with #things and their relationship is strengthened but it is messy to begin with #but i find kidd and noam’s story very based on self improvment for people with pre-established severe mental health conditions #where it is very much working around a lot of obstacles and finding ways to better yourself while knowing you have caused harm in the past #even if unintentionally or through a period of deluision #kidd and noam are important to me because they both have very different mental health issues and are activly flawed because of them #but still have to find ways to redefine their relationship to eachother while understanding that doing so means undergoing major changes in #their lives and their behaviors because neither can continue forward without seeking serious help

[designernishiki]

I feel like I liked yakuza 5 a lot more than most people for some reason

#like a lot of people seem to not like it or think it’s mid #idk man but it was one of the games I enjoyed most and I really liked the range of characters you get to play #love me a murder mystery too #idk I think people seem to not like how disjointed the plot is at first and trying to keep up with everyone’s seperate plot and characters #and etc. but I personally really liked how it was all disjointed and the further you get into the game / the more characters you play the #more shit starts coming together and forming a full picture #like don’t get me wrong it’s not perfect and I do have qualms with some. choices. (mostly having to do with majima and #mirei) but overall it’s one of the games I’ve enjoyed the most and that’s kept me interested in the plot the most #fantastic to get a more in-depth look at haruka and to get to really know her by playing her and seeing how she interacts with people and #choices she makes and etc. I don’t think she was a fully fleshed out character prior to that #loved her with all my heart already don’t get me wrong but she just didn’t have much time on screen especially as a teenager to fully get #her personality across and some of the issues she deals with (mommy issues. abandonment issues #etc). #and her and uncle akiyama are a very nice unexpected duo!!! #the different settings were fun too. overall I think the whole thing just felt like more of a streamlined story in a way with drastically #different viewpoints depending on the character #also shinada’s a gift. bless him #daigo feels three dimensional and emotionally present in a way I didn’t see much in other games- even when he’s literally a boss in 4. tbh #the only other time I think he feels really solid as a character is in fuckin dead souls. I think it’s cause it’s SO rare to see daigo in #non-serious situations or vulnerable with people on purpose. dead souls has the first thing and y5 has a bit of both #and I could complain more about how y6 SHOULD have made daigo more present instead of sending him to fuckin jail the whole time but. I do #get that that was kind of important to the plot. I mean to have that power vacuum. don’t think all three of them should’ve been put in jail #but I digress. anyway I got off topic point is I enjoyed yakuza 5 it is very unique in my opinion #y5 #rambling #ALL THESE TAGS AND I FORGOT TO MENTION KIRYU BEING ANGSTY AND GAY AS HELL. THE BEST PART OF YAKUZA 5

[kyuala]

SOOOOOO hard to go through everyday life trying to ignore the never-ending feeling that im just irreparably fucked up and therefore should just give up on everything

#this aint exactly s******* but it aint exactly not s******* either #anyways it gets even harder when i have to live under the same roof as my brother who is so much better than me in every single conceivable #and imaginable way possible like #and i knowwww a LOT of it comes down to us having relatively similar yet wildly different lives despite being 1.5y apart and having the sam #family our entire lives like he has gone through NOTHING and i mean not a single societal issue ive had to face and endure my entire life #he's a man im a woman. he's white im black. he's straight im gay. he's skinny ive always been 'overweight'. he's always been the good #christian kid ive always had issues w faith and religion. he's never been mentally ill i was clinically depressed for nearly 8yrs of my lif #we both lost the same parent and im the only one who got pathological grief and a personality disorder out of it. he's had a great job for #the last 7yrs that now pays him 20k+ every month ive only had 3 odd jobs my entire life and 2 of those my MOTHER had to give me so i would #have SOMETHING and ive never made over 1.6k monthly n my last job was minimum wage only #he's had like 4 relationships and is nearly engaged im so traumatized + emotionally unavailable ive only ever been on 1 date my entire life #he has a good relationship w every family member we have i have Issues w like half the family. he's always been an active member of our #church i can barely listen to like 4 traditional hymns before i start losing my mind and spiraling. i think the only two ways we're pretty #much equal like socially is that we're both able bodied cis and christians but still the cis and christian thing is debatable for previousl #stated reasons so like. do yall see how much better he is doing than me in every little last area in life and how he's always gotten the #long straw when it comes to Not having to deal w certain obstacles in life. n i know its like yea idk what it actually is like to be him an #he could not be doing all that well first of all shut up. second of all if it was 1 or 2 things i'd get it but it's literally EVERYTHING #and i know bc of said things n our v different lives it's unfair to me to compare the two of us but then it begs the question: WHY #WHY did i have to go through these things. WHY do i have to deal w this. WHY did i get the short straw literally every goddamn time #WHY did i have to get THIS life like WHYYYYY why ME GOD. why have I had to put up w all this bullshit for 24 fucking years!!!!!!!!! im TIRE #and this is not me hating or resenting him i know it's not his fault and he is so good to me #but still. why was i left with these things? to live like this? #so yes i guess i do envy him a little bit. who wouldn't #mari.txt #personal #tw negative #dl #btw i do NOT mean some identities are better than others. i mean he is better and is doing better than me in life partially bc he's never #had to deal w certain social issues and obstacles that come w oppressed identities.

[hiddenbeks]

what is your oc's core theme?

tagged by @gwynbleidd to do this quiz, thank you jackie!!

tagging @hibernationsuit @nokstella @ravensgard @yrlietlanaevyss @ehlnofaey @feitanportor @katsigian @rosykims don't remember who has done this recently so. as usual. no pressure if u don't feel like doing this!

doing this for the once iconic poe duo that has faded into obscurity because i've neglected them for so long! time for a sura & viv renaissance babeyy

sura - the leaver

"there is nothing for you here anymore. you are being rejected by this place. it repulses you, too - you have no desire to stay here. yet, some nostalgic thorn curls into your side and keeps you bound here. there is comfort in a hell you once called home. but it is time to go. no time to stall. if you wait too long, this place will swallow you whole. then, you will have no chance to leave. you need to go; you've been waiting so long. the door is open. all it waits for is your first step. your painting is "artist's death. the last friend" by zygmunt andrychiewicz."

vivinna vellico - the popular

"the attention of outsiders is like opium. at your heart and soul you produce and create and you thrive on the love it gathers from others. it is like taking your first steps as a baby, and hearing the cheers of thousands upon thousands of parents, encouraging you to move a little more, to step towards mother or father. but when the cheers fall silent, you are lost, aimless, a boat in a turbulent sea with no lighthouse to guide you. you are no longer taking steps. there is no voice calling out to you, signalling where to turn, and there is no encouragement. you want to take the steps but you cannot find any good reason to - not without everybody waiting at the end of your path. your painting is "the birth of venus" by sandro botticelli."

okay first of all i love how viv got the least common result. if she were real and the one taking this quiz she would be so proud of that 😌 anyway. both results are spot on and illustrate the differences between these two quite well! sura longs for connection and a place to call home but feels out of place no matter where she goes and thus continues to further isolate herself. vivinna on the other hand surrounds herself with people to entertain - she has many friends and acquaintances but no idea who she is without the attention of others.. hm.....

#tag games #ch: sura #ch: vivinna #listen sura used to be one of my dearest most precious ocs..... i talked abt her a Lot...... #vivinna too. she wasn't as big as sura and i still havent gotten around to playing poe with her lol but i had a lot to say abt her too!! #i love them. both white haired unwanted children who have similar issues but deal with them in very different ways.... #initially they do not understand each other at all but they become great friends and learn so much from each other..... #i've forgotten a lot abt sura and i've been meaning to rewrite her backstory but i haven't gotten around to that either. sigh #but for now just know that her life sucks and she's never had a place to truly call home. and the companions she meets in dyrwood #are the first real friends she's ever had in her life. ok.

[autisticandroids]

DEAN: Cas, I just can't...

[youtube]

dean's perspective on godstiel arc. the way cas failed him. the feeling of abandonment. the obligation to control. affection for cas souring on his tongue as the imaginary idol he built in his mind shatters. the trials and tribulations of being the center of the universe.

that is not my lover and that's not even my friend.

#spn #vid #so. director's commentary. this video is mostly about dean's control issues with a couple of other themes. #like it's both about how dean feels responsible for cas (see: 'clear my name' over 'cas you child why didn't you listen to me' and also #death blaming dean for godstiel (????)) but it's also about how cas used to be someone dean felt he could control and that's no longer true #like cas used to be someone dean felt like he could just get to do anything. and now he's not and that's kind of a shocking revelation that #renders cas mysterious and unknowable and scary #like when dean felt he could control cas. when he felt like they were in it together. then it could just be the two of them against the #rest of the world (we made love in the tower of babel and it fell down). but now cas isn't doing what dean says #and worse: he has other loyalties. loyalty to god/heaven which is NOT acceptable in dean's book. it means there's a part of cas dean can't #have and dean can't deal with that. it's also bound up with another theme of this video which is: dean and cas' relationship is on the #rocks in s6 because sam died and cas didn't and cas didn't fix it and also he's still loyal to angels/god (very different things for cas #but the same to dean) and dean blames them for sam's death. and then sam continues to be not really back for most of s6 so dean's still mad #plus cas and dean haven't seen each other for a year so dean has had tons of time to massage his memories of cas to be more pleasing #so dean has all these idealized memories of cas and a cas who obeyed him when he threatened to withdraw affection and a cas who was alone #in the world and only his and now he's faced with the real cas who values other things higher than dean's approval and has other commitmnts #and he hates that cas for not being the cas in his head who is perfect. and also now that they're having this big conflict dean is denying #that cas was ever anything but his enemy and the object of his hatred. because he's so angry and also because he blames himself for #anything his loves ones do that's outside his control because he has huge control issues so the only way to assuage the guilt is by #denying that cas was ever one of his loved ones #oh and also the montage of dean refusing to help cas/helping very grudgingly/demanding things of cas is there as a contrast. to show that #the ideal cas who needed nothing from dean and did everything dean wanted never existed. he's an invention in dean's mind #and also that sequence is the explanation for WHY cas didn't go to dean (which is what dean's maddest about because it takes away control): #he had no reason to think dean would help. and if dean actually thought about it he'd realize that. but dean's self-image is OFF the WALL #and cas in 4x18 is THEE idealized image of cas because he's breaking ranks to be with dean he's choosing dean and doing what dean wants #because dean is able to get through to him EMOTIONALLY ('we're done') which is what dean likes. rationality is nothing to dean #and dean denies 'are you god' not only because he's denying any former affection for cas. he's also denying that he would ever put anyone #(god. heaven. cas.) in an authority position above himself. only he can be the authority. because he's angry and so all the cracks in his #shell close up. he has to maintain his identity as a Real Man invested in Freedom and Power harder than ever. he can't be told what to do #oh and 'under the bridges of fame it's always nighttime.' that's about dean being The Protagonist. & the consequences cas suffers from that

[throttlegainwell]

Hello, Didn't want to say anything except it is awesome to find a fellow Jonathan Byers AND Scott Summers enjoyer, I love both of those characters a lot.

Ah, that's awesome! Thanks for saying hi. I am, indeed, massively gone for both of those guys, and I am equally delighted to come across another fan of both.

#answered asks #scott summers #jonathan byers #very little in common except for all the stuff they have in common really #but i mean eldest sibling issues probable neurodivergence hyper-independence loner status don't want to be in charge but kind of have to be #responsibility to their people to the detriment of their own well-being got to do everything themselves not well liked or understood #accusations of being boring or morally questionable but just doing their best and grinding away relentlessly #abandonment issues childhood abuse & neglect i could go on #yet they're so very very different and also one shoots kinetic energy beams from his eyes #so there's that #scott would dislike jonathan's music #and ngl the fact that jonathan spends a significant portion of his time in a darkroom under a safelight #which is red #and scott's whole deal is red #that cracks me up a little #though there's something to be said for scott's keen spatial awareness vs. jonathan's eye for composition #and jonathan isn't a nuts and bolts guy and he can handle himself but lbr scott's training regimen would kill him #also i doubt jonathan has ever read a comic in his life and even in the 80s scott was no one's favorite #also yeah they're both pretty reserved quiet & locked-down emotionally & can't deal with their issues + pragmatic as hell #but i think jonathan has more self-awareness about it and he's way more sensitive #whereas scott was just never going to be a particularly emotional guy he's logical af it's how he's wired #anyway yes i love these two hyper-competent messes a whole lot #and have written many words about them both and will probably write many more

[countess-of-edessa]

dont really see why more children is automatically better tbh. obviously being open to life is important but i see no inherent value in having many children that isnt teetering on the edge of utilitarianism and violating the personalistic norm.

#i am very glad to only have one sibling both because we are extremely close and because our childhood was spent caring for our elderly #grandfather and then our high school middle school years were spent dealing with my dad's health issues #i started babysitting my granddad when i was like eight. it would have been a nightmare to have to deal with multiple young children/babies #in the ensuing years because it just wouldn’t have worked for our family #and my parents didn’t actively plan to have two kids they didn’t like plan their family or whatever #but it just worked out that way and it was emphatically for the best #and everyone likes to bring up the ‘don’t not have another kid because you want a boat!!!!1!' point which like yes that’s correct #but there is a difference between wanting to live in luxury and not wanting to live in poverty. i think people should strive against #intentionally bringing children into poverty or having more children than they can afford to give a basically decent life #because it is unkind to a child to do so. #yes don’t have a boat instead of a kid. but where do these people draw the line? can’t afford to put your kids through catholic schools? #can’t afford to have savings in case someone is injured or ill? #can’t afford to keep Mom home to stay with the children? #bringing people into the world because you think their quantity will get you into heaven is selfish and it uses children as a means to an #end when they should be an expression of love only.

[silverwhittlingknife]

nightwing secret files | nightwing 139

so in nightwing secret files and origins, there's a hurt/comfort storyline called "lost pages: teen titans." dick's robin and he's grieving for his parents and having a hard time, and he's gone off on his own, and wally comes and finds him. and then in nightwing 139, there's a hurt/comfort story where tim's robin, and he's grieving and he's gotten kidnapped and tempted into trying to resurrect his loved ones, and dick comes and finds him.

both of these comics are wonderful & i would now like to share my favorite parallels.

brooding over memories:

anger turning into tears:

outstretched hand of affection:

teary removal of mask:

hugs and family:

anyway i love these stories separately but i also love all the little ways they echo each other <333

#i really love post-crisis nightwing comics you guys #something something paying it forward #history doesn't repeat itself but it does rhyme #dick grayson #tim drake #dick & tim #this is a little hard to articulate and obviously the storylines are very different but there's still something compelling to me here #both about dick and tim's similarities and about the role of friendship in their lives #one aspect of dick and tim's brotherhood that i like a lot is that in some ways in his relationship with tim #dick is often the kind of friend that his titans friends have been to him - and i find those parallels really moving #often he's got an instinct for the right thing to say or do because tim's dealing with things he's been through before #and he also ends up kinda low-key revisiting some of his own issues because tim has a bunch of the same ones #because their issues are so similar dick's attitude toward tim is sometimes kind of a proxy for his attitude toward his younger self #like in graduation day when he's being hard on tim in pretty much the exact ways he's hard on himself #and donna's pushing him to be more understanding but of course that's the precise thing that dick's bad at doing #because he doesn't know how to cut himself any slack ever about anything #which makes it doubly touching to me when he gets past that #because it's not just about extending grace to tim but also to himself #which is really hard because it's really hard for dick to forgive himself for anything #so it's the collision of his uncompromising attitude toward himself and his love for tim #and the love always wins in the end *cries* #parallels

[vioyume]

He has 10,000 diseases but he loves him regardless.

The rat is named Bill.

I like it without lines too ok.

#Dealing with art block atm but the idea of taranza with a pet rat amuses me #also tried to properly do some clean lineart #but I also struggle back and forth between not having it because both look good #ahhh the issues when having the ability to draw in different ways #kirby series #kirby #kirby fanart #taranza #fanart #vio.png

[purplelea]

Twewy native Pre week 2 neku and kh1 Riku would be the most toxic friend group ever

I had to specify neku as twewy native because in dream drop josh straight up said they all died and that's why they got sent to traverse town. But given his lines it's clear he's at least past peak asshole neku.

Thoughts?

OH YEAH VERY TRUE. but actually I don't even think they'd be friends, if that makes sense. Riku needs someone kind who looks up to him (like Sora and Kairi), and Neku pre-twewy... isn't that. Neku on the other hands needs people he can relate to and who share his worldviews (ex: how he got along with Joshua in week 2 and was able to have many interesting discussions with him despite, yknow, thinking Joshua murdered him). So it wouldn't actually work if there was only the two of them: Riku doesn't share Neku's values of shutting himself from people because he's scared of getting hurt & hurting them. And Neku only looks up to CAT.

#léa replies #it's interesting to think about tho. if somehow they were hanging out... it would honestly not be very good. for anyone. #now you got me thinking about how Riku's low self-esteem can be a parallel to Beat and Shiki but each have a different way to deal with it #Riku's low self-esteem becomes jealousy when he sees someone else hang out with Sora (he puts the blame on others) #a reaction that appears to be similar to Beat who's angry at for example kariya when Rhyme dies #but it's actually just a facade. and he's mostly angry at himself for his incompetence #and Shiki on the other hand gets jealous of Eri but turns that against herself to the point that she tries to erase her own self #so she can reach Eri's supposed perfection #so we have a broad range of reactions to low sefl-esteem #and while Riku's is obviously the most harmful for others (increased by the fact that Maleficient and Ansem SOD took advantage of it) #i don't want to call him toxic for that. he's just a lost kid who doesn't know how to handle change. just like Kairi is. #and that's why they drift apart with Sora trying to chase both of them because he's the only one who is able to handle change. #his issues lie elsewhere. #anyway i could swear i was going somewhere with this but i had dinner in between so i forgor... #maybe something about how yeah Neku was toxic pre-twewy but i don't think Riku was before it all went downhill in kh1 #it's really Maleficient and Ansem's manipulation who made him go the extra mile and hurt others when he only wanted to save Kairi #and yeah i guess making the words fall and trying to kill Sora is pretty toxic at this point lmao #thanks for the ask! #twewy spoilers #twewy #kingdom hearts

[timeisacephalopod]

I saw a post the other day that kinda pushed back on the way all coming of age movies are about sexuality and all high school stories basically center around who wants to fuck who and how that's like. Not really all coming of age and high school stories should offer since you know. Youth isn't about who you have a crush on and probably coming of age stories in particular should be far more diverse in subject matter than they are.

Honestly as someone who, when I was 'coming of age' age, hated coming of age stories and still do for the exact reason listed above (see the weird scene in It where we all sexualize a 13 year old girl because boys have crushes and surely there's no other way to portray this than feeling a child up with a camera to demonstrate boys have ~feelings~ Bev gets no equivalent scene because she's the object of affection rather than the subject feeling desire) I also wish there was diversity in those stories. And coming of age stories about adults- we don't stop going through huge life moments that change everything forever, but back to kids. When I was a kid I could have desperately used a coming of age story where the character has a sick and dying parent who does die by the end of the story and what happens after that. Granted I did just fine without it, but even without being asexual it's always irked me that coming of age stories don't seem to appreciate that kids have way larger problems and way better stories to tell then first crushes and first kisses for shit sake give kids who went through what I did as a kid some kind of story about what happens when your parent gets cancer and how complicated that is and stop assuming the biggest thing that happens around puberty is discovering sexuality that, if you were queer, you probably already noticed what you felt wasn't in a coming of age story anyway.

#winters ramblings #id actually LOVE to see a coming of age story about an immigrant child moving to a new country #and have the coming of age center around THAT instead of these bizarre vaguely adult explorations of sexuality #that honestly ive never related to anyway like maybe the allos get it but even THEY deserve more diversity in stories #SURELY even your local allos have a dad dying of cancer they desperately need to know what to do with #like deadass a therapist told me at 26 i was robbed as a child because of what i went through and i STILL cry when i think of that #but no coming of age is all sex shit because children according to adults dont have real issues #which tells me adukts writing the stories are MASSIVELY privileged or stunted by execs or straight up assune kids wont watch #a REAL coming of age story. also i want a coming of age story about a 40 year old who is going through a career change #and the struggles that come with late career change. the benefits of a late career change. all the complicated family goo around all this #just give me decent stories that arent too focused on fycking RELATIONSHIPS for once. have them there sure i dont care #but for FUCK sakes can we stop pretending a 13 year olds biggest concern us who they have a crush on?? #my dad was DEAD and i knew only one other person who lost her mom way younger than me at 8 #we did not understand each other and how could we when our situations were so different. BOTH of us were so highly alienated #because NO ONE not even each other could relate to a lot if the people around us. the only thing we DID have in common #was the sick feeling we got when someone would bitch about their parents having fair expectations or not giving them literally everything #we both had an 'at least you HAVE parents to hokd you to reasonable standards and all you do is SQUANDER it' even if our feelings werent #faur to our peers anymore than their feelings were fair to us. wheres the coming of age story about THAT #tell me a story about a 16 year old whos mom has been dead HALF her life already like my friend. i was lucky enough not to deal with that #until i was 24. she deserved better out if high school and coming of age stories too. believe it or not kids have REAL lives and problems #and im SO tired of no one writing anything but some sad kids books about it even if the books are SOMETHING to start with #like for shit sakes must NICEthat the worst thing YOU went through was realizing you had a sexuality but my queer ass #ALWAYS knew i was different and highschool highlighted that a BUNCH so unless we're exploring aroace teens that doesnt appeal either #great yet ANOTHER story about straight teenagers because THEYRE the ones who need guidance on how to express themselves #like they dont see strsight people storoes and sexuality EVERYWHERE plus the ACTUAL opportunity to date in high school #that most queer kids dont get or dont get in the same way. why is THAT the only story being told when its the most saturated and BORING #and also ignores that kids have REAL issues and NO angency. explore THAT. do ANYTHING but yet another fucking coming of age story #about straight kids having crushes on each other and thats IT like come on SERIOUSLY