#there is always a person who wants to help you in times of stress with comfort and reassurance.

[purgatorytf]

I’m too smart for my own good and sometimes I wish I could live a simpler life. Whether that be as a dumb jock or some workout gear for one, I’ve always wanted to know what that’s felt like.

You had been rambling to your friend Jessica about how stressed out you were in your life. Your exemplary academic and subsequent professional career had landed you in a high-paying but high-responsibility position. It felt like you had so much to worry about; the budgets, the meetings, the bureaucracy, the hierarchy. All that had taken over your life and you couldn't even make time for sex anymore, nevermind a relationship.

"I don't even have time for a boyfriend right now, i wish everything was just ... simpler...."

Jessica sighed. This hadn't been the first time you told her this, every conversation you had revolved around how strained you felt. She grabbed something from her bag and handed it to you : a cap. She told you that she snatched it from one of the douchebags who catcalled her at the gym and that he wouldn't miss it.

"This guy clearly didn't have a lot going on up there. You should put it on and see how it feels. Maybe having a little bit of him in you will help you turn your brain off and relax."

You shrugged and decided to put in on. It's not like it could hurt. You secured the cap on your head and you instantly felt all your worries and your intellect drain out of your head and converting into thick bulging muscles all over your unremarkable body. Your pecs rose into a thick muscular shelf as your abs popped out. your biceps and shoulders ballooned, your thighs enlarged. Your entire body surged and strained against your clothes.

All of that boring business stuff exited your mind forever and you felt so much better. Everything felt so much simpler already. Your clothes quickly turned into the typical jock attire : trunks, a tanktop and grey sweaters.

In disbelief, you lifted the tank top to look at your new body "Holy shit bro, i look swole !" But just as you said those words, you felt even more of your brains drain out. This time, your entire personality flushed down into your enlarging balls. It started with your smart and charming persona, and eventually your values. Your kindness, your empathy, you compassion. All of that served as fuel for your swelling manhood, leaving nothing left of your morality and judgement, turning you into an arrogant, self-centered gymrat.

As you pawed at your impressive package, you quickly realized it demanded attention. But you found the images that came to your mind to not be the hunky men you were used to. Instead you could only envision yourself fondling tits and sticking your dick in wet pussy. Your homosexuality had been flushed. Gone was the kind, sensitive gay best friend and in his place was now a macho breeder.

"Fuck bruh, i need to pound some pussy huhu"

Your entire being now revolved around your biological duty. A real man's only desire was women's curvy bodies, their full lips, their aching pussies. And you wanted to- no, you were going to fill them with your seed. That's why you spent all your time at the gym pumping iron : to score some pussy. You looked in the mirror and saw yourself for who you were always meant to be : a jacked, stinky straight gym bro stroking his fat cock.

Your lengthening python demanded attention. With a dopey grin, you looked up at the chick in front of you and already saw yourself putting a baby in her womb. You scratched at your throbbing cock.

"Hey babe, wanna help me out with this ?"

Enjoy your new breeder life bro. No more smarts, no more individuality. You're now a perfectly assimilated straight male with no worries. Now go pump some iron and spread your seed !

#male tf #male transformation #ask #jock tf #jock transformation #mental change #dumbing down #gay to straight #mental tf #reality change

[tinyundercover]

pepper & felix

part eleven

the aftermath of last night word count: 2.5k

Felix stared at the ceiling, vaguely aware of the alarm beeping on his nightstand.

It was grating to his ears. Internally, he knew that he needed to get ready for class, but the events of last night simply refused to leave his mind. Stressful memories weighed down on him like a rock, leaving him motionless in his bed.

Pepper is my soulmate.

The voice in his mind and the borrower in his walls were the same person. It was comforting to finally have an explanation for his strange feelings towards Pepper, and why he always felt so drawn to him… but at the same time, it was hard not to feel absolutely terrified.

A month ago, he didn’t even know that borrowers existed. Worry fluttered around Felix’s chest as he wondered how they would possibly further their relationship, considering their vast size difference and the uncomfortable power imbalance between them. He had only held Pepper a few times, and he had been wracked with anxiety every single time. Now, he wasn’t just putting the life of a borrower in his hands, but his soulmate’s. 

…And what was he supposed to tell his friends and family?

Felix sighed heavily, drawing his blanket further to him. Part of him wished he had stayed at Alice’s place yesterday to explain everything to her, but he hadn’t wanted to keep the borrowers there any longer. Today, he would have to talk to Alice alone and explain the situation without putting Pepper and his sister in more danger.

A sleepy, familiar voice suddenly floated into his mind, disrupting his thoughts. “Your alarm is going off.”

Felix sat up abruptly, finally registering the consistent beeping that filled the room. With a flush he leaned over, shutting off his alarm, then brought his hands to his chest. “Sorry. I was thinking.”

“About me, I hope,” Pepper said sleepily. A second later he added, “Basil says hi.”

It took a moment for Felix to register who “Basil” was. He drummed his fingers over his chest, curious, wondering if Pepper had meant to share his sister’s name or if it had slipped out by accident.

His lips twitched into a smile. “Tell her I said hi.”

“Mhmmm.”

Pepper’s voice had already drifted off into exhaustion. A warm feeling swirled around Felix’s chest, and as he got out of he bed, he tried to remain quiet for his small, sleeping guests.

—— 

Sunlight filtered through the window, dappling the floor of the hallway in yellow. Felix waited against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, checking his phone every few minutes.

Alice had agreed to meet him here, but as time stretched on, Felix was beginning to doubt her. His stomach twisted in a mixture of fear and guilt, and he prayed that Alice would at least be willing to listen. They had been friends for almost three years. He wanted more than anything to give her the benefit of the doubt.

“Hey.”

Felix glanced up, heart skipping a beat when he caught sight of Alice approaching. Her expression was empty, but Felix couldn’t help but notice the tightness of her hand around the strap of her bookbag.

“Alice,” Felix said in relief, straightening up. “Hi.”

She stopped a few feet away and leaned against the wall, crossing her arms. Her blue eyes danced over his form before meeting his gaze again. She said nothing, clearly expecting him to talk first.

“Did you tell anyone about them?” Felix asked before he could stop himself.

Dark lashes blinked. “...Why would I do that?” Alice responded after a moment, tilting her head. Felix still couldn’t read her emotions. “No one would believe me.”

Relief rushed into Felix’s chest, and he exhaled, nodding. “Good. Thank you. They’re not supposed to—”

“What the hell happened last night?” Alice cut him off, exasperation seeping into her tone. “Seriously, what the fuck?”

Felix immediately faltered. He supposed that was a fair reaction, but he still wasn’t prepared for her sudden frustration. “It’s— it’s a lot to explain.”

Alice raised her eyebrows.

“They’re just people,” Felix clarified, fiddling his thumbs and frowning. “But… a lot smaller. They’re not, like, dangerous or anything. Just people.”

“Well, obviously,” Alice pointed out. “I just want to know what they were doing in your apartment.”

Felix found himself at a loss for words. How much was he allowed to share with Alice without putting the existence of borrowers in any more danger? 

“They’re my friends,” he said slowly.

Alice stared for a moment, eyebrows lifting. “You’re… actually friends with them?”

Felix frowned and nodded, and Alice crossed her arms, brow furrowing again. “Oh. When they said they were your friends, I… I thought they were lying. It’s not like you’ve ever told anyone about them.” She peered closer at Felix, eyes icy. “Why didn’t you tell me? Or Breanna? Owen?”

Warmth spread through Felix’s chest, a bit flustered to hear that the borrowers had referred to themselves as his friends. He then hardened his expression as he processed Alice’s other words, the warmth fading. “They’re a secret,” he pointed out. “Humans aren’t supposed to know about them because when they do they put them in jars.”

The anger entered his voice without meaning to. Alice stepped back, hurt etched in her expression. “What else was I supposed to do?”

“I don’t know– talk to them?”

“I tried to!” Alice exclaimed. “They just freaked out!”

“Alice,” Felix exhaled, momentarily pressing his fingertips to his temples, “they’re three inches tall. Just think about what we look like to them. Of course they would freak out– they were probably scared of you.”

“I barely touched them.”

Felix blinked, processing her words. Heat filled his chest, hot and angry. “Are you serious?”

“I mean– I put them in my pocket for a second, and then I put them in that jar, but that’s–”

“You hurt them!” Felix retorted before he could stop himself. Alice jumped. “Didn’t you see the bruise on Ba– on that girl’s face?”

Silence stretched between them for several seconds. Alice’s face fell, blinking rapidly. “That was an accident. She fell when she was in the jar.”

“That you put them in,” Felix objected, features sharp.

Alice stared at him, lips slightly parted, brow furrowed. Felix could sense the frustration floating off of her, and guilt instinctively crept its way into his chest past his own anger. He hadn’t meant for this to turn into an accusation. 

It was hard for him to truly believe that Alice would intentionally harm either borrower beyond repair. As difficult as Alice was being, Felix understood that she was just confused about last night’s events. He couldn’t exactly blame her for acting irrationally towards the borrowers when she didn’t even know that they existed until twelve hours ago. (It’s not like his first interaction with Pepper had gone smoothly, either.)

Alice tended to maintain a tough, closed-off persona, which Felix usually found admirable. Unfortunately, Alice’s attitude meant that strangers tended to think she was cold-hearted– so Felix couldn’t even imagine how a borrower might perceive her, with every one of her actions amplified tenfold. Honestly, if Felix was three inches tall, he would be positively terrified of her. 

Felix took a deep breath, focusing on Alice again. “Just… just please don’t tell anyone about them,” he said finally. “That’s all. I’m sorry you got mixed up in this.”

Alice said nothing.

—

“But did she say sorry?” Pepper demanded.

The borrower had his palms pressed to the back of his neck, pacing back and forth across the counter, mindful of the large knife being wielded only a foot away. Felix was chopping tomatoes on a cutting board, and although his eyes were focused on the knife, he was paying attention to what Pepper was saying.

“I think she feels bad,” Felix responded after a moment, brow furrowing. 

“She should feel bad,” Pepper grumbled. “She could have killed us.” The memories of being shaken around a jar flashed through his mind, and he instinctively dropped his hands to hug himself, shuddering at the distant feeling of his joints slamming into solid glass.

Felix spared him a glance, eyes searching his small form, before turning back to the cutting board. “Ah… is your sister doing okay?” His voice was light.

Pepper stopped pacing and peered up at Felix. “She’s okay. She’s been sleeping all day, actually, but she’s overdue for some rest.” A miserable thought entered his mind, and he frowned, registering for the first time this evening that he was holding a conversation with a giant. “You know, yesterday was the first time she’s ever been seen by a human.”

Worry crossed Felix’s face. “Oh. That… that must have been awful.”

“It was.” Pepper nodded dejectedly, unable to sugarcoat it if he tried. “I mean, I was terrified, and I actually have experience with humans.” He gestured vaguely to Felix, who had abandoned the cutting board and was now giving Pepper his full attention. “But it was all new for her. It had to be so… overwhelming.”

The borrower sighed, gaze wandering to Felix’s hand, which was resting on the handle of the massive knife. “Being grabbed is not fun.” He shuddered at the memories of being trapped in an unrelenting grip, arms painfully pressed into his ribs. “You’re— you’re completely helpless, and when you’re against someone so much bigger than you it’s terrifying. It’s— it’s just…”

He trailed off at Felix’s wide-eyed expression. A twinge of guilt entered Pepper’s chest at the memory of their first meeting, and he shifted on his feet. “I’m really lucky that you’re nice,” Pepper added as an afterthought. Felix said nothing.

Felix remained quiet for the remainder of the cooking process, occasionally nodding or humming in response to Pepper’s rambling. Part of Pepper felt guilty for insulting Felix’s friend over and over again, but in his defense, she had literally kidnapped him.

In all honesty, it was just nice to spend some time with Felix alone. 

“What are you making?” Pepper asked finally. Felix had moved further down the corner to where the stove was, turning the heat on. The occasional click or clang of Felix’s cooking equipment made Pepper a little dizzy, but he ignored it.

“Pasta,” Felix replied, holding up an uncooked piece of rigatoni before dropping it into a large pot. A flush crossed Felix’s face suddenly. “I, um, I thought these pieces might be easier for you to take home with you.”

Something fluttered in Pepper’s chest, warm and surprised. A small part of him— his defensive, primal instinct— hissed at him for taking handouts from a human. 

But at the same time, it was a nice feeling to be considered in something as insignificant as dinner.

“Thank you,” Pepper said breathlessly. 

As Felix stirred a wooden spoon into the pot, Pepper began his trek along the counter. Felix had moved the cutting board away after he had scraped the diced tomatoes into a pan, opening up Pepper’s path towards the stovetop.

As he approached, the heat from the humming stove was startling. Pepper had watched Felix cook for a year, but he had always been hidden away in the walls. This was the closest he had ever been to the stove while it was on.

A small gap, about half an inch long, was nestled between the edge of the gray countertop and the smooth white surface of the stove. On the burner closest to Pepper was a wide black pan, and although Pepper couldn’t see the pasta sauce within it, he could certainly smell it. Past the pan was a tall pot, bubbling with water.

The cooking process had become surprisingly loud in the last few minutes. Unable to quell his curiosity, Pepper stood up on his toes at the edge of the gap, trying to peer into the pan which contained the pasta sauce.

Felix caught his eye, and although Pepper trusted his own instincts, Felix certainly didn’t.

“Wh— hey,” Pepper objected, suppressing a flinch as Felix’s large hand suddenly approached. Alarm bells rang in his mind, and on instinct he dropped back into his heels. 

Felix hadn’t touched him all day, hadn’t even tried. The last thing Pepper had expected at this moment was for Felix to grab him, especially after what happened last night.

But Felix didn’t grab him. The human barely even looked at him, blue gaze distractedly shifting from the small borrower back to the stovetop. Pepper blinked in surprise as the back of Felix’s knuckles bumped into his chest, slightly curled inward, gently nudging the borrower away from the stove. Pepper’s small hands landed on Felix’s forefinger for stability.

“Careful,” Felix murmured, withdrawing his hand and turning his attention fully back to the boiling pot of water.

Pepper blinked. His own hands floated in the air, empty and useless. He hadn’t expected the gentle touch from Felix, nor had he expected it to vanish seconds later, feeling strangely empty.

So much power resided within Felix’s hand. Pepper had felt the sheer force radiating from those fingers, each one surpassing him in height, and inwardly he knew that Felix could have done anything he wanted. Felix could have snatched Pepper up or swatted him away without even batting an eye, but the knuckles against Pepper’s chest had been soft, careful, gentle.

Felix was humming to himself, clearly not aware of how significant his action had appeared to Pepper. The borrower stared up at him, heart fluttering, suddenly in awe of the calculated way Felix was moving his hands around as he cooked.

It’s not like Pepper had actually been in danger. As a borrower, he knew better than to stand at the edge of the counter without paying close attention to where he placed his feet.

Still, as he stared up at his soulmate, he felt incredibly touched.

——

The empty jar was still sitting on Alice’s counter, sticking out like a sore thumb. She hadn’t touched it since last night.

It was hard not to stare at it. She leaned against the wall opposite to the counter, a glass of water in hand, the room silent aside from the faint hum of the kitchen light. 

She couldn’t sleep. 

She hadn’t been able to sleep last night, either, not since Felix had left her apartment with two tiny people in hand.

The jar seemed to taunt Alice. It was on its side, left there after Felix had tipped it to free the tiny people inside. If Alice looked closely, she could see the smattering of tiny handprints on the glass, each one smaller than her fingernail, and she could only wonder what the tiny people were doing now. 

Her phone was in her hand before she could think about it, her thumb hovering over Felix’s contact, and she briefly thought back to how it had felt to hold two entire people in a fist. Her nose scrunched, and she stared down at her phone’s glowing screen, unable to move a muscle.

With a heavy breath she finally turned her phone off and slipped it into her pocket.

She’ll see Felix tomorrow at their first rehearsal, anyway.

------

tysm for reading!! <3

@smallsday @compact-katrina @satethesatelite @taters169 @entomolog-t @gtzel @gt-newbie @da3dm

#pepper & felix #g/t #g/t writing

[nextinline-if]

Hi! How are you?

Short answer and the more polite answer since I don't think people on the internet want to hear my rants - I'm managing. I'm in therapy. On medication. Getting help and just taking it one day at a time right now.

Thanks for checking in anon and anyone else who has sent a message. I haven't abandoned the game. And I know that it doesn't help that I have no update now but I'm just kind of in the "I have to get my shit together or else" kind of place right now. I've spent years and years avoiding mental health and it's caught up with me.

Rants below just to provide some sort of update on why things are where they are, but feel free to ignore them.

I'm feeling lots of feelings at the moment. It's almost May and I've not really accomplished much at all this year. My mother-in-law is in the hospital, and the NHS just wants to send her home instead of helping her. I'm feeling incredibly helpless and useless as a partner, how do you support your partner through this? Doing my best but I'm so frustrated and can't do anything to make it better or make anyone listen and help my mother-in-law.

My employer is probably going under financially and many things don't sit right with my values so I'm stressing about finding a new job. Obviously grateful to have work but it's taken a huge toll on my mental health. I've dedicated dozens of hours each week to job hunting and interviewing - I feel so burnt out but can't afford to let up.

My therapist has asked me not to do any writing of any kind. She believes I am not in a place where this is productive for my mental health. I've always used writing as an outlet. These last couple of months have been difficult. I have not touched my journals, scripts, or games. My fingers ache to write but I don't want to let all my progress go up in flames so alas, this Tumblr ask is the most I've written in months and I can only hope I get better soon so that won't be the truth. I probably shouldn't have written this even but I've been feeling so guilty, every day it crosses my mind that I've just gone MIA on here.

If you read this, you're a gem and I'm sorry if it's too personal - I just don't want anyone to think I've abandoned things. I'm just really focused on healing right now because I have to focus on it.

Wishing you the best.

-Vi

#quick update

[holly-opal]

Hello...I wanted to make a request that I don't know if it's something personal and I understand that you don't want to do it...but you could do a mr puzzle x helping a reader who suffers from hypersexuality... I will understand that if it may seem uncomfortable to you I won't force you to do it, I just want to feel comfortable with my favorite character

Of course, I am sorry if I do this wrong. I have never written hypersexuality before, so forgive me if I do this wrong.

Tw: Mildly sexual content. Implied SA.

You were walking to your dressing room when Mr. Puzzles went up to you, he put a hand on your shoulder and gave you a warm smile, he asked if you could see him in his office later today, he wanted to talk about something. You blushed and nodded, you have always liked Mr. Puzzles, you found him charming and quite the lovely person to be around, and he was very attractive for a man with a TV for a head, then your mind began to wander and you thought about the two of you together, in your bed hugging and kissing each other, and you two taking your clothes off.... You were doing that again. Thinking sexually about someone or wanting to do sexual things with someone. You felt disgusted with yourself, and thought that Mr. Puzzles wouldn't like that either. He'd probably tell you to piss off, like everyone else you had sexual encounters with. You followed him into his office and sat down in front of him, he offered you a cigarette, you declined. You were never one for smoking, your ex did though, and he was the one who hurt you. Made you do awful things with him. Harmed you in bed. You felt so gross for doing, and even more disgusted with yourself when you actually sorta liked it. He shrugged and blew some smoke, he seemed tense. "I'm going to get real with you, Y/N. I am not very happy with ratings. I am working so hard and yet I'm not getting good results. And production is going up in flames. Ugh..." Mr. Puzzles smoked some more, he was stressed, you had an idea on how to release it though. You got up from your chair and sat on his lap, he started blush and stare at you in surprise, you began to praise him for his good work and rubbed your hands on his chest.

Mr. Puzzles was touched by this, his face was beet red and he was starting to like it. But he see that you weren't doing this out of your own volition, he could tell that you weren't happy about this. He grabbed your wrists and put them away, you were afraid now, you didn't know what came over you, you expected him to get mad at you or throw you off of him or hit you. He didn't though, he picked up you and set you down on your feet. He sighed and kneeled down to your level, you began to tear up and look away from his gaze. He had seen this kind of behavior before, in television and in his actors. He gave you a very big hug, you started to cry and hugged him back. Those thoughts in your head were killing you. 'Your disgusting', 'nobody will love you if you keep doing that', 'your just like your ex, only worse'. You've heard these words before, but still, it kept repeating in your head multiple times. You were sobbing into Puzzle's shoulder, leaving a wet spot of where your tears went. Mr. Puzzles pulled away from the hug, ye was smiling at you, and he was patting you in the back.

"Mi amor, I know that you are hurting, but this isn't the right way to go. You don't have to give yourself to me so that I could feel better. I am not mad, but we need to work on your issues." You nodded, wiping away some tears with your sleeves. Mr. Puzzles grabbed a box of tissues and handed some to you, you blew your nose and threw it away. He stood up and held out his hand. "How about this? We'll both talk about safe outlets for your behavior, that way you won't get hurt by anyone. And then afterwards, we can go to dinner. How does that sound?" Mr. Puzzles asked. You smiled and nodded, you clearly needed to work through your issues, a nice talk and maybe even a therapist will help. You took his hand and you both walked out of his office, you felt relieved in a way. He did not judge you, and he even offered to help you, many would've just left you immediately. Your love for him deepened, and his love for you has not changed, you were still his little star.

(Again, I am sorry if I did this wrong. I hope this brings comfort to you, my friend.)

#smg4 mr puzzles #mr puzzles x reader #mr puzzles #puzzlevision arc #smg4 puzzlevision #smg4 ships #smg4

[autistpride]

Autism Acceptance

Prompt 10: Restaurant AU

Wordcount: 600

@wolfstarmicrofic

“Sirius, could you get table three for me?” Marlene asked Sirius, “I need a smoke break.” 

“Ya sure of course,” Sirius called back before walking over to the table in question and pulling out his notepad and pen. “What can I get for you?” 

“I’m sorry we need a little more time,” a red haired girl said.

Sirius glanced between the two people sitting at the small table and nodded before turning on his heel. Sirius watched from across the dining floor as the red haired teen whispered to the mousy brown haired boy that Sirius assumed was her boyfriend as they looked nothing alike. She seemed worried or anxious Sirius couldn’t tell. The boy seemed to be stressed and upset despite not having even ordered their meals yet. 

Sirius walked back over after a few minutes, “is there anything I can help you with?” He asked.

“No no I’m sorry but we still aren’t ready yet,” She said apologetically.

Sirius looked over at the boy who sat with his head in his hands. 

“Hey, do you need some help?” Sirius asked and the boy didn’t respond.

“You don't have his usual on the menu anymore. He gets it every time. When he tried to order it earlier, the other worker said it wasn’t on the menu. So we’re just trying to find something else.” 

“Ah, I see.” Sirius said softly before noticing the rainbow infinity pin. Sirius knelt down near the teen boy. “Hey, what’s your name?”

“That’s Remus and I’m Lily,” the red haired girl spoke before Remus had a chance to talk. 

“Thank you Lily,” Sirius said sincerely before asking Remus, “What was your usual?”

Remus glanced over at Sirius, his bottom lip trapped between his teeth. After a minute he responded quietly, “California chicken sandwich.

Sirius grinned, “One California chicken sandwich with chips coming right up.”

Remus’ jaw dropped in surprise, “really?”

“Ya really. Anything special I should make sure to tell the cook?” Sirius asked.

Remus worried his lip again and shook his head no. He didn’t want to push his luck.

“Come on Remus. I can tell you want to say something. What is it?” Sirius asked, leaning down. “You can even whisper it to me like it’s a secret.” 

Remus knocked his fists together a few times and then whispered, “I like when they have a smile.”

Sirius's face scrunched up in thought and then nodded. “On it.”

Twenty minutes later Sirius brought out the plates of food. Sirius was glad James was working as the cook that day. He was always willing to make special orders when Sirius asked. 

Sirius set Lily’s food down in front of her and then Remus’ down in front of him. 

Remus looked up at Sirius with widened golden eyes and Sirius winked and said, “I hope you enjoy your meals”. Remus gently pried the top bun off the sandwich and made a very excited squeak. 

Sirius had placed the pickles to be two eyes. He made the eyebrows, pupils, and nose from mustard and the mouth from ketchup. He carefully arranged the lettuce around the top as if it was hair and the avocado around the bottom as if it was shoulders. 

“Woah,” Lily exclaimed from across the table.

When Remus looked up Sirius had vanished. 

The person bringing them their check was their original wait staff and Remus frowned in disappointment. 

“I hope you both had a lovely date,” she said.

“Oh! We’re not together!” Lily said laughing. 

“I’m quite gay,” Remus said, “no offence Lils”

Marlene passed Remus something.

She gave him Sirius’ number.

#mauraders #actually audhd #wolfstar #my writing #autistic remus #autism acceptence month

[yasmimkilleruwu]

your headcanons about toby? :D

Some hcs about Toby ^^

Connie, Lyra and Toby wore a matching lanyard, they each had one, but Toby ended up losing his and ended up without it, he actually looked everywhere but couldn't find it, after Lyra's death Toby's mother gave it to him Lyra's necklace for Toby, so he would always remember her and have her close by.

Under no circumstances touch Toby's cord.

He tried to take his own life several times, but Slenderman didn't allow him to do so, but Slenderman doesn't stop him from hurting himself.

Eyeless Jack helps Toby stop cutting himself, he knows how many and where each scar is, so when Toby gets a new cut, he tries to prevent Jack from touching it.

He lived in the mansion, but after a while he started living in a cabin with the Heartless and the X-Virus.

Toby goes days without sleeping, so X-Virus, Heartless, Kate and Eyeless Jack try to make him sleep more, because even though he doesn't have missions, he can't sleep.

Toby was a little homophobic because of his father's influence, but Lyra told him that he shouldn't listen to their father, as it was a bad thought, so he didn't care so much, but his father ended up contaminating it a little his head.

Because of Toby's father's influence, Toby suppressed his feelings for Eyeless Jack and ignored Eyeless Jack for a long time, only going to Eyeless Jack if he really had to, but that didn't last long.

After Toby's father's influence passed, Toby started to wear more extravagant clothes, but he only wears this type of clothes sometimes, he started to accept the clothing suggestions that Nina suggested for him. {Jack liked this change .}

He convinced Eyeless Jack to wear more extravagant and elegant clothes too, as he wanted Eyeless Jack to wear clothes that showed off his body more.

Also influenced by his father, Toby repressed all the feelings he had, his father scolded him when he was crying, saying he was weak and several other things.

Toby is the type of person who forgets everything he's supposed to do, but Eyeless Jack is almost always there to remind Toby of everything.

He gets distracted very easily, so Kate or Hoodie give him missions separately from the other proxies, so they can explain everything so he doesn't get distracted by others.

He used to bring hidden animals to the mansion, so he could have some kind of company, but he stopped when he saw that Slenderman killed them all.

He and the X-Virus are afraid of spiders, this fear got worse when the Heartless caught their attention saying that she had something to show, and when she opened her mouth a spider came out of her mouth.

He's very flexible, he does a lot of crazy poses and of course he doesn't mind as he doesn't feel pain.

It is very common for blood to come out of his nose, as he is almost always stressed.

Sometimes he hurt himself on purpose just to see Jack, because there was a time when he could only see Jack if he was hurt.

Toby's favorite birthday was when, in the afternoon, he had a big party thrown by his closest friends and in the evening Eyeless Jack made a big dinner for the two of them, he received several gifts that day.

He hates being called Ticci, he doesn't know himself or actually doesn't remember why, but he really hates being called that.

Toby is one of the most agile and fast proxies, he is very dangerous if you really irritate him.

He is demiromantic and pansexual. {He is also asexual, but he still feels sexual attraction, but very little.}

{I have several hcs about him, I already said some in another post I made talking about him and Eyeless Jack.}

{And I'm sorry for any writing errors.}

#ticci toby #eyeless jack #ticcijack #creepypasta

[lokideservesahug]

Obsessed In Love

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

Pairing: Yandere!Checo Pérez x gn!reader

(Slight) Yuki Tsunoda x reader

Warnings: Yandre, obsession, dark themes ofc (all kinda subtle). Badly translated Spanish

Request: Could you do yandere! Checo Perez with male reader? 👀

Notes: I'm not quite sure how to approach male readers just yet so I tried to do a gn reader instead. Pls let me know if you want something different though. This is the first time I've tried tow rite anything like this so feedback is greatly appreciated. Also if anyone wants a second part then pls let me know

Summary: You were very happy with your job- personal assistant for Sergio Pérez. Yet unbeknownst to you, being Checo's personal assistant isn't enough for him.

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

You hadn't been at Red Bull Racing for long but from what you've experienced so far, it has been amazing. You came in at the start of the 2024 season as Sergio Pérez's personal assistant and its just great. All of the crew were lively and welcoming to you, especially Checo. You've been following F1 for a long time now (hence how you found out about the hardly advertised job opening) and have always admired Checo and his ravcracraft so it was a huge honour to work alongside him. Unsurprisingly, media days are the least strenuous for the drivers but the most difficult for the PR/media team and as someone who worked under the former but worked directly alongside a driver, you had a nice balance of stress.

You scan your paddock pass and at the familiar beeps, you start your trek to Red Bull hospitality. You decided to arrive here early today so you can get a head start on the weekend and so you can even hang around with those you don't often get time to, like the engineers etc. You walk over to your workspace and get our your ipad with the schedule for today. Looks like you'll be following Checo around from 10-12 whilst he does miscellaneous activities and jobs first thing. You check the clock next to you. 8:35. You still have a good hour and a quarter until you need to start worrying about your 'boss' coming in.

You dive into your work and begin checking emails and planning entirely for the next few races. You're engrossed in your works for what feels like hours when you hear a gentle knock on the door. "Come in." You say, whilst placing the ipad on the desk and standing up. "Oh! Checo, I must have lost track of time." You glance at the clock. 8:57. Oh, that's odd. "Good morning cariño" You smile at his warm greeting. "Morning Checo, it isn't like you to be this early. What's the occasion?" For a split second you could have sworn that he looked like he was about to protest your words but swiftly caught himself.

"I uh- just thought I'd get an early start." He gave you a half smile and you smiled at his words. "Well Mr early start, I don't think there's much to do. You'd probably be most helpful speaking to some mechanics about any further adjustments but aside from that. But you can do anything I suppose" You turn to look at him after you finish your pacing only to find him sat down on a seat in the corner of your 'office'. You go to ask him what he's doing but he leans backspace, crosses his legs and speaks before you can get any words out. The corner of his lips turn up at the tilt of his head. "What? I thought you said I could do anything?" His half sarcastic response leaves you speechless. "You won't even know I'm here querida. Unless you ask for help which I'll be happy to give." You feel your cheeks warm slightly at his words and sit doen at your desks and continue as you were when he came in.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Checo was really quite helpful and by the time you had finished all you planned for the morning and much more, it was 10 o'clock.

You tidy up the miscellaneous work that manged to scatter across your desk and turn to the Mexican stood to your side. "Thank you for your help." He smiles at your words and looks at the clock behind you. "No worry querida. Any time" You feel yourself blush slightly at his words and so you look down and step away from the desk. You point out the time and ask if you should begin your duties. "You go ahead cariño, I just need to do something." Not thinking much of his words (and assuming he probably had to tie his shoe laces or send a text) you leave the door, parting with a soft "See you in the foyer in a minute."

You sit down on a plush leather sofa by the door waiting for Sergio's return to do your first job of the day. Suddenly, the door quietly opens and you hear the distant shouts of fans and the ever moving ambience of a Formula 1 race track. You turn to look at the door, already knowing who the disruptor of your momentary peace is. "Morning Max." The Dutch man nods at you walk in your direction to place a clearly empty red bull can in the bin.

He sits down to your left and stretches out. "So, what media duties do you have today?" Max hums in thought and furrows his brows at your question. "Uhm- I think I have to film one of those what's in the box videos and then soem looking at the car, meeting a few fans and then the video with Checo at the end of the day." You hum in acknowledgement at Max's words. The Red Bull YouTube video at the end of the day should be quite nice. Unsurprisingly, it features him and Checo but also Daniel and Yuki. You continue chatting, waiting for Checo until the Mexican comes through the door. You stand to greet Checo and begin walking out if the door to begin your day. He smiles at your greetings and unbeknownst to you, gives Max a harsh glare at the proximity of the two of you when he first entered.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

The day seemed to breeze by and by the time it came to the last media duty, you were shocked at how late it already was. You stand to the side under a canopy, watching as the RB (both Red Bull and VCARB) drivers mess around with each other. The sight of Checo and Max having a small, futile squabble over who gets to drive however, makes you laugh softly. You turn to look at the other drivers as Checo (not that you know) turns to give you a longing glance for the millionth time today. The cameraman calls for a small break before the next segment if the video will be filmed and the drivers all let out a collective sigh of relief.

You walk to the corner of the gazebo and fetch a chilled red bull from the cooler box for Checo. You wait at the edge of the canopy, still in the shade, for Checo to give the now slightly warmer drink to him. However instead if the regular presence of a certain Pérez to your side, you instead find a short Japanese man. "Hi Yuki." The pilot grins at your words and waves slightly. "Hello Y/N, how are you today?" You continue to exchange pleasantries with the man ; you've become more acquainted recently due to him often approaching you and staying for long chats.

"So how is tha-" Yuki doenst get to finish that thought as a gruff sounding Checo cuts across him, saying your name. You turn to him and give him a small smile whilst sticking your red bull filled hand out. "Sorry it's slightly warm, I got it out a little bit ago when you stopped filming." You look from the thawed ice in the shoe of your fingers to Checo's face only to find his lips pulled together in a tight line and was he glaring at something? Before you can ask ehats wrong, he meets your eyes and his gaze softens.

"Thank you querida." The cameraman calls to the drivers to return to in front of the lens. Checo lingers for as long as he can at your side until you have to jokingly nudge him in the direction of the camera before he leaves with a breathy laugh.

☆-☆-☆-☆-☆

Despite your early arrival, you get back to your office fairly late. You're one of the last people left in the red bull hospitality (aside from a few mechanics of course but they are just all superhuman). You just want to get him and collapse in your bed by the time you push your office door open but fortunately, you know that you just need to grab a few things and you'll be done for the day.

You place the ipad in the overnight charging dock (a clever little timed thing as to not waste excess energy) and grab your handbag from the floor where it lies. But your gaze catches on a red bull in the middle of the desk. Now it's not surprising in the slightest to see cans everywhere when you work for the big Asutrain company. However, this can is unlike one you've ever seen before. It's almost, glittery? You're curious as to what it is and of course where it came from.

Yet you chalk it up to it maybe being a very nice staff member or maybe even someone that has noticed you in the paddock (a certain Japanese man comes to mind before your mind shoos that away). However, you decide to try a bit of the drink. Heck you'll need at least some caffeine to make it home. You hear the ever satisfying crunch of the ring pull and when you put it to your lips it tastes divine. You almost moan at the sensation of a rich, almost Berry like taste, unlike anything you've ever tried before. You feel like you need to sit down to fully appreciate the flavour.

Wait. No. You feel like you need to sit down regardless. You feel a slight pressure in your head that you convince yourself that you're just imagining. You take another sip of the drink to try and subside the feeling. You place the half full can on your desk and go to walk rewards the door. But the door begins to look slightly fuzzy. Before you even try to make sense of what's happening, you suddenly feel yourself begin to grow weightless and fall backward.

You expect to hear a thump and be met with the hard, carpeted floor. However, you instead find yourself met with something warm and soft. Your mind , which is growing ever hazier, tries to make your head look up but you find yourself frozen, unable to move. At your attempts at mobility your hesr a quiet "shhh." You groan in response trying to understand who the person (cradling you?) Is. "Shhh querida. You're safe with me. Just relax." And that's all it takes for you to drift into unconsciousness.

-°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°--°•°•°•°•--•°•°•°•°-

Please let me know if anyone would be interested in a second part!

Thank you for reading. As always, likes, reblogs and especially feedback is always welcome.

Taglist (irdk if this is anyone's thing so sorry if it's not). @nikfigueiredo @mysoulispainted @leclercings @d3kstar @hiireadstuff @a-beaverhausen @nichmeddar @lozzamez3 @stinkyjax @marymustdie @littlesatanicassholebitch @mehrmonga @insanedeathwish @ems-alexandra @a-disturbing-self-reflection @cherry-piee @minkyungseokie

#f1 #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 fanfic #checo perez x reader #sergio checo pérez #checo perez #sergio pérez x reader #sergio perez x reader #sergio perez #checo perez x gn!reader #sergio perez x gn!reader #yandere #tw yandere #yandere sergio pérez #yandere checo #ldah's writing

[sunwarmed-ash]

Heyoooo Happy Monday!

Did yall read last nights Sinful Sunday update? its here if you didn't get a chance yet!

I also got tagged by @lizzy0305 for WIP Wednesday Monday!

WIP MONDAY

Detroit Become Human, Hurt/Comfort, Sad Gavin Reed, HankCon established, previous Hankvin, eventual Hankconvin

My love language is misery: (Ch 3 preview)

It's silent in the car since Connor and Hank left the station to go check on Gavin.  According to Detective Chen, the younger Detective had left work shortly after their ‘interaction’ outside the breakroom. Mentioning something about needing a change of clothes before walking out. Hank and Connor were quick to follow him out the doors and Connor’s earlier worry only compounded the longer they traveled.  “To answer your question from earlier, about me and Gavin having a relationship. sorta.”  “Sorta how?” Connor asks, needing to know everything to sort out a best course of action to help Gavin.  Hank exhales through his nose and keeps his eyes forward out the windshield.  “Before everything went to shit, and before me and Annie got together again. When we were both young and single, and fuckin’ everythin’ that moved… We hooked up, few times. But I thought- He never mentioned…” Hank huffs a little, struggling to find the right words, “I didn't think it was more than that… Always thought we were just playin’ but, what he said yesterday… haven't been able to get it out of my head since.” Connor analyzes Hank's increase in blood pressure and stress and places his hand on Hank’s knee in comfort.  “What did he say?”  Hank takes one hand off the steering wheel to squeeze it before returning his hand to its previous position on the wheel.  “That I only want him when I can’t have him. Specifically, when I’m already with someone else. I don't know, I guess, now that I look back and think about it, I can see why he said it. I’ve never been very good at maintaining personal ‘relationships.’” “I don't know, I'd say this relationship is going quite well,” Connor smiles. It eases enough of the tension hanging in the car and Hank chuckles.  “Yeah, I think that’s sorta the problem.” “He perceives me as a threat,” Connor interprets. “Big time.” “I see.” “We’ve always had a, complicated, relationship, Gav and I. But he's got some of his own additional demons on board. I think that might be what’s fucking him up now. Especially since uh, we aren't doing to much to hide our relationship at work.” “Yes, perhaps we have been playing a little ‘fast and loose’ with that line,” Connor agrees.  “Mmm,” Hank agrees. A few moments of silence pass in the car and then Connor has to ask,  “What happened to him?” Hank’s next exhale is obviously conflicted.  “Can’t tell ya that, I’m afraid. Sorry Con. It's his business, nothing personal. I just wouldn't feel right.” “I understand,” Connor says, because he does. No unintended subtext. PTSD is something Connor is intimately familiar with now, and he wants to come across as non threatening as possible tonight. “Are there any general things I should be aware of? I don't want to unintentionally set off an attack.”  “Just, follow my lead. And let him come to you. When he’s dissociating, he can’t always see what's going on in front of him.” More pieces slid into place for Connor with that confession.  “Like this morning, in the breakroom.” “Yeah, exactly.” It’s quiet another moment and then Connor says,  “He’s lucky to have someone like you Hank,” because he means it. Gavin doesn’t have a lot of friends at the DPD thanks to his almost 24/7 sour mood. And after today, he could probably use one.  Hank scoffs a little disbelievingly at Connor’s praise but meets him in the middle with,   “Yeah well, hopefully we can at least convince him to accept our help.”

@sweeteatercat @treeffles @disdaidal @tradedsymmetry @covenscribe @advictoriams @negative-citadel @writerwhowritesao3 and anyone else who wants to!! Have a great day everyone, I'm gonna try and get some sun today!

#wip monday #hankconvin #cop sandwich #hankvin800 #detroit become human #connor rk800 #gavin reed #hank anderson #find me on ao3 #sunwarmed ash #buy me a coffee? #links in pinned #reblogs are free ways to support me! #i post new stuff every sunday #sinful sunday #my love language is misery

[mr-payjay]

analysis of oj's thought process in this scene for funsies (quick warning for suitcase being put down and seen as inferior by another but it's not character neg)

why is oj being a massive fucking bitch? 🤔 Let's analyze.

so, obviously oj is living off a power trip in this episode. interesting implications about his actual power as a hotel owner. actually, at the beginning of the episode, we can see that he is NOT RESPECTED. salt lies about cleaning up, pepper demands him where the towels are (and he smugly lets her enter the DEATH TRAP DOOR? implying a familiar but negative relationship), and in general oj (and paper sort of but that's not relevant) seems to be the only caretaker while the rest of the residents are more like customers. though it seems they are *meant* to help out (such as salt being supposed to clean).

anyway. once oj gets the temporary host role for inanimate insanity, he immediately gets excited. we transition to the scene outside the hotel and he even does a little twirl! oj starts to read off the paper mephone uses (which oj has happily vandalized with drawings of himself and a snarky little message, this points to his general disdain towards mephone) and is trying to go Smoothly through with it. once the teams start fighting, he doesn't even try to figure out who's telling the truth, preferring instead to eliminate a random person. he REALLY likes to be efficient with his time, huh? that's talked about more in the next paragraph, but in this one i'll say a bit about his hatred for inanimate insanity. for the whole episode, he is uncaring of the show's rules, guidelines, structures, etc. he eliminates someone at random, he makes the contestants clean the hotel NOT as a challenge then flips a coin to determine the loser (only after they question him), he makes them sing for no reason other than to be entertained, he zips through every step as fast as possible. he does not care at all about ii, despite being so eager to host it. why? because hosting it means he gets to boss around a group of people (and he can make them clean his hotel! something he really needs help with!!), he gets to take mephone's place and mess with his stuff and disrespect his show, and generally he gets to sort of... take out some of his lasting frustrations surrounding ii. i don't think ANY of the season one cast is fond of inanimate insanity (and especially not of mephone), even if it brought them together (also not always a good thing). oj certainly isn't.

once he picks suitcase, he starts by calling her "whats-your-face" (thank you for noticing mari), then a few seconds later calls her by her actual name. thissss is so interesting to me. he KNOWS her name, apparently. but he called her a mean name first. this can either imply that he forgot, that he's just being a jerk for the hell of it, or both. i think it's both. a mix of his obsession with productivity and his need to be superior motivates this. he wants to get the elimination over with as quickly as possible, so quickly that he doesn't even bother to remember her name right away, because he's SO efficient that he just simply Doesn't have time for these things (in his mind). so it makes him feel both superior to her (disrespecting her), makes him feel good about himself (he feels like he's just being Productive and Time Efficient and part of that is that he has "no time" to do anything else but work). basically, he DID forget her name for like, a singular second, he just didn't bother to wait a moment or correct himself instead of calling her something else.

and for telling suitcase she's ruining the show? let's bring it back to ii1. oj insults people whenever he feels like it. he's pretty mean, and he's worse when he's stressed. he insults people particularly for being "useless" (such as to bomb), and is quick to fight back against anyone who challenges him. a pushover like suitcase is easy to demean. and it makes him respect her even less when she's being so meek! oj thinks his snappishness is justified by the fact he's, once more, simply being time efficient ("we've got a busy schedule!"), and that she is just wasting his time. i said earlier that oj doesnt respect inanimate insanity. so why does he accuse her of ruining the show if he doesn't care about it? well, because this is *his* episode. his time to be the host. even if he disregards the usual way things run, he's still going to get upset if something conflicts with *his* plans. he wants to get this over with and get them to clean his hotel, not much else (again, he's still enjoying being in a position of authority, he just likes to be nonchalant about how Superior and Powerful he is now). if someone's interrupting that, he's going to assert himself. oj always fights back against anyone who challenges him, and suitcase is too much of a doormat to stop him from shutting her down.

now for oj telling her to step back. this part is petty. he's irritated but also kind of. happy about being irritated. "what," you say? well, see, suitcase is genuinely trying to follow his directions. she just doesn't know how *much* to step back, obviously. so oj keeps shooing her a little bit at a time until she's finally offscreen, and you can tell he's a little bit annoyed by it. but this is part of the power & superiority once more! he gets to boss around someone "inferior to him" who is just soooo stupid that she doesn't even know where to go. and oj has to shoo her over and over because she's just not getting it (since he is sooo very much smarter than her and she is just completely incapable of following OBVIOUS directions.) but it's okay she is simply a Minor inconvenience (in his head) that he has dealt with now. also note that he could've just pointed to where she had to go. does this paragraph make sense? he likes being able to tell others what to do and have them do it, so even if she's kind of annoying him by not completely understanding the instructions, he still gets to assert his authority quite a bit.

this analysis is particularly focused on the scene in the video but i do bring up some other parts of the episode to support it.

#juice.txt #osc #oj ii #ii oj #oj inanimate insanity #inanimate insanity #yet another ramble of mine #i should start tagging these #juice ramble #there #anyway oj has npd #this thought process may seem insane and cruel #and it kind of is #but he's not a bad person #just has fucking problems

[slymanner]

Okay honestly these two episodes were absolutely a blast and had so many fun moments to them.

but dude the amount of COMFORT in this scene is unimaginable i love it sm gary is such a good guy...

Everybody deserves this type of love and comfort istg it's so good.

the fact he gave her a early invitation to the bakery just to give her even the smallest amount of comfort to her while she's afraid of cake's whereabouts and even giving her a LATTE AND GIVE HER REASSURANCE HE'LL HELP HER WITH THE SEARCH AFTER HES DONE MAKING SOME FOOD IN THE BACK...

I love u gary, we all deserve a gary in our lives and give him all the love and comfort possible back to him for his efforts.

#adventure time #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #fionna the human #prince gumball #its just everything in this scene man. #the night time vibe #the comfyness of the dialogue... #i love this show man #it has so much fun in it but these scenes where its just a regular town with regular people #going through their lives some are good some are bad some are in between #but there's always that PERSON #that person that truly cares about you and you do back #and it makes you feel like life isnt actually as bad as it is... #Gary is that #hes that reminder even when things go wrong #there is always a person who wants to help you in times of stress with comfort and reassurance. #this goes for online friends too <333

[todayisafridaynight]

what makes minedai even sadder is that we never rlly see daigo try to build a bond with anyone else like he did with mine it rlly shows how badly it effected him like yeah he reached out to shinada in y5 but that’s rlly it and he probably would wanna leave him alone after that and not involve him in any yakuza stuff so i don’t think they would’ve hung out or anything like that afterwards. All he rlly had were saejima and majima but they were more like babysitters than anything, wish we saw more of their dynamic tho like we did with majima and daigo in dead souls since that was fun and we were lowkey robbed but in canon he’s just as lonely as he was before majimas promise to kiryu. And mine is the only person he really had a meaningful relationship with romantic or not they were still really close and we don’t see that again with daigo ever (from what i recall after y3) ok sorry for rambling LMFAO

even with shinada, he reached out to him more so out of 'duty' and trying to make up for the misfortune that befell him because of yakuza than wanting to rekindle any kind of friendship they might have had in high school (though it sounds more like they were just acquaintances if shinada needing a second to remember who daigo was is anything), so yah i doubt they really had any kind of bond afterwards

dead souls really was the only time after Y3 where we got to see daigo be more sociable with someone, but its as you say majima and saejima are more like retainers than close friends

#snap chats #you can tell i was into fire emblem when the first term that comes to my mind to call majima and saejima was 'retainers' omfg #but yeah ..... depressing .... #does make me wonder who daigo was on the phone with during the rggo story though. like clearly daigo has friends #apparently. we just never see or hear of them. tho ig it is implied those were his friends from the y2 era. as mine said flarkjla #REGARDLESS yeah after y3 daigo just feels depressing to watch #i think its just because he really has to do everything on his own now #but not even have a friend to just chill with at the end of the day- like the technical work is whatever. for the most part #THATS stressful obvi so to not have anyone to really be personable with thats probably the dire part. imo. #cause yk the world could suck but as long as you have that One Person to just relax with then its ok but with mine gone. 🧍‍♂️ #probably doesnt help that like. during the 'flashback' segment of y3 where we get to see daigo sitting with kiryu and nakahara #we see him all cheery and bein a lil jokester and just. A Happy Dude #granted this is barely a year or two into being chairman so The Horrors Havent Set In relatively but still ... i miss his smile .. #every time i think of daigo post-mine i think of those like. tragedies or accounts of people where its like #'after X's friend/lover died they never found another again' like thats the vibe i always get #he really packed it up and never got close with anyone else again and it makes me want to throw up #y4 widow arc still good tho it makes me chortle

[northern-passage]

You don't have to respond to this if you don't want to, I know it will start unneeded drama but I just found it soooo interesting that, since the transphobic blog lets you see their likes, most of their likes are TWC related. And it's not like that fandom is notorious for being a toxic hellspace, no sir.

to be frank it's not just twc, the IF space as a whole is pretty notorious for being toxic at this point. whether you're on tumblr or reddit or the forums, you're going to find these kinds of people lurking around.

that was why i did post that person's username because i could see them interacting with various other authors, and it's best to just block them before they send you something stupid, too.

just like any large online community there are going to be a lot of trolls trying to get attention by sending inflammatory messages or leaving cruel comments wherever they can; i've been getting that kind of stuff sent to me or left in reviews or comments for years now. and currently losers online are having a fucking field day with everything that's going on right now - racism, islamophobia, antisemitism, transphobia, even gore, i've gotten it all in my inbox over the last few months and i've seen others get even worse. these people are pathetic and not worth your time. i've gotten better at not responding to stuff like that, but it is hard to resist that instinctive anger, and that's exactly why they do it & exactly why you see it in every single fandom/online space.

all of that to say, just ignore and block them and you'll have a far better time online than if you constantly try to argue or reason with them because they don't care, their only goal is to make you miserable. even if you think you have some epic clapback, it's not worth it, you're still giving them the attention they clearly desperately want and potentially exposing others to harmful rhetoric. just block 'em, babey!

#it's also why i didn't bother actually responding to that person's message cus there was no reason to share it #just for them to get some weirdo satisfaction from it #i really try to only respond if i feel like it's something i can properly address in a meaningful way #but you can tell when asks are just meant to upset you and you should just block and delete those #and i dont care about twc but i dont think its helpful to blame one single group here #when overall the fandom space within IF and elsewhere is always kinda rancid #i cannot stress enough to just block people. i've gotten way more liberal about it over the years #there's no reason for you to have to interact with every single person just cus you're in the same space #even as an author #extracting myself from certain circles has helped me way more than trying to appease an audience that hates me #anyways it's been upsetting this past few months to see the depravity of some people that are just reveling in all of this #that's why i kinda wanted to respond to this. it's bleak out here but you'll always have the block button and the knowledge #that despite it all you aren't someone who wasted their time harassing random strangers on the internet! #ask #anonymous

[licorishh]

Hey as a super introverted but not shy person I'd just like to say the jokes about extroverts "adopting" introverts to "get them out of their shell" are actually completely unfunny and it just goes to show how little respect a lot of y'all have for the fact that we genuinely don't want excessive social interaction and that y'all are forcing us to do something that brings us extreme physical and mental discomfort because you perceive our introversion as a failing rather than as purely a difference in personality.

We don't need your "help" to socialize. We're not children. We're simply not interested in spending every waking second of our lives talking to people and being talked at in return.

#again i scream from the rooftops that there is a monumental chasm between being shy and actually being an introvert #a shy person is someone who's afraid of social interaction. an extrovert can be naturally shy. #a shy person can WANT lots of social interaction but simply have not learned to feel comfortable in social situations. #people who are just very introverted simply have little desire or capacity for excessive human interaction. #we're not “afraid” of it. we just don't enjoy it and it wears us out. #you don't need to swoop in and save us because we can't handle ourselves. we're perfectly fine thank you #extroverts are constantly demanding that we get out of our comfort zones but few of you are willing to make the alternative more comfortabl #if you're a very extroverted person please do not take it upon yourself to jokingly “adopt” introverts you meet. #it's not funny and it's not helpful. it's irritating that you perceive our quietness and low social battery as something that needs “fixing #we won't miraculously learn to love and be comfortable with excessive human interaction. that's not how we're wired and that's OKAY #i'm honestly getting so sick of the “the lonely introvert and the extrovert who adopted them” memes #i can guarantee you that if you are an extrovert who operates this way then your introvert “friend” is actually probably very uncomfortable #and just don't want to say anything because they think it would be rude to bring up the fact that they don't want what you want from them #this does NOT mean extroverts and introverts cannot be friends nor am i saying all extroverts are annoying or that they all do this #i'm simply saying that if you are very extroverted and you have a friend who's very introverted #then it's on you to be aware of your introvert friend's limited social battery and STOP pressuring them to just “put up with it” #don't spend every second with them constantly talking. be willing to spend some time just in the quiet. #be willing to let them bow out of something if they're exhausted and are low on social energy. #don't expect them to want to come to every meeting or party or get-together because it WILL drain them completely. #be willing to let them spend time alone when they need to to recharge. #letting an introvert cool off and recharge when they need to is ALWAYS going to make social situations less stressful for them. #PLEAAAAASE take their feelings into account and understand that they do NOT perceive social interactions the way you do. #most very introverted people do not find socialization relaxing or invigorating. they don't do it to unwind #they have to unwind AFTER lots of social interaction #that's about it. thank you and good night

[calamitydaze]

long tag ramble below u have been warned

#ok i feel like i should say Something before i start being active again #but i dont want it to be a Statement which is why i’m putting it in the tags #(also bc i procrastinated doing this for weeks so i know this is a very stale topic by now #but i also haven’t been on tumblr literally at all so this is 100% my organic authentic opinion lmao) #so read if you gaf and ignore if you don’t #anyway: george def could’ve done more to ensure she was comfortable #and as someone who has also gotten in over my head with older men and regretted it #her hurt is valid and i’m deeply sorry she feels the way she does about that night #but with that said i see no reason to believe george Should have known how she really felt #or that he deliberately took advantage of either her youth/inexperience or her discomfort #and that’s the most important thing for me— he fucked up and misread a situation but that doesn’t make him an evil person #and i hope they can both move on and grow and heal #as for my future in the fandom: i honestly dunno how active i’ll be going forward #i was already becoming pretty disconnected so this might’ve just sped up the process? i’m tired of being put through the wringer #but i also don’t really have a fandom to replace this so i might just continue casually participating in the way i have been #either way rest assured i will never become a rabid anti. that shits embarrassing #i got HORRIBLE drolo rsd the other day when tommy’s mom needed clout and vagued him so like if nothing else. droloisms are forever #also as a last thing— this feels kinda silly and self centered to say but i will anyway #sorry for not opening up my blog as a forum for discussion again the way i did with the drituation #i know i helped a lot of people sort out their feelings and that was (and is) really really important to me #but it also tanked my mental health (mostly as a result of the fallout and not the act itself but still) #plus my life irl was pretty stressful at the time when everything was first going down #so i just didn’t feel up to putting myself through that again #but i’m sorry if anyone wanted to discuss w me but wasn’t able to #anyway. i think that’s all i have to say! #i don’t want to turn this into a capital D discussion but as always my askbox and dms are open #love you all tons! i hope you’re having a good day 🫂🫶 #bella talks

[flowerygn]

so, i moved out of my appartement

#that was a stressful weekend but i'm so thankful for everyone who helped me #i really need to sort stuff out i was so shocked to see how much small stuff i own #i will miss my small home so much but at the same time i'm glad this chapter of my life is over now :D #i'm a bit scared of the future now tho but aren't i always #i will miss the town tho i like it here so much more than my stupid hometown #btw i'm moving back with my parents and while i love them its going to be a lot on my mental health!!!! every single person i met was like #'are you sure you want to move back with your parents ARE YOU SURE IS THERE NO OTHER OPTION' 😭 everyone knows the damage parents can have #on ur mental health #but for now i'm broke and i'm grateful that my parents let me move back with them

[nightingalesighs]

What really pisses me off when people are like. No child should be friends with an adult; it’s (insert word/phrase that has been misused so much it’s kinda ceased to have meaning to me anymore) is… My older friends? Even though I’m 28 and yknow. An Adult. Have literally saved my life. Like not only do they have more knowledge about how things work (like Medicaid and food stamps and student loans and resumes and and and all the other shit nobody bothers to teach you and can be hella confusing/nearly inaccessible unless you Know but is hella important/can really fuck up your life if you’re not careful) and like…more experience so when they tell you “it’s gonna be hard, but you can handle it” or “I know it looks scary, but it’s not that bad and I promise you’ll get through it” or “it doesn’t matter if don’t graduate college, look at me. I didn’t. I’ve got a stable, well paying job. It’s not impossible to be comfortable without a college degree. And look at (other friend who is sitting right next to them), they worked their ass off for a double degree and currently not using it! You’ll be okay, you’ll figure it out.” your brain can actually believe them cuz yknow. They’ve been where you are. They have that life experience. And they’re not gonna lie to you because they love you and respect you too much to do that.

Like I don’t want to make it sound like friendship is a commodity, but older friends and intergenerational friendships can be so extremely valuable, especially to vulnerable younger people in abusive households. And I don’t even mean like in that they can offer you a place to crash cuz not every friend is gonna be able to do that and that’s OKAY. But maybe they can still help you in other ways. Even if it’s “just” holding your hand and validating your fears while you cry your eyes out but reassuring you that they believe in your ability to work through it. They believe in *you*. (And yes, I REALLY appreciate the same sentiment from friends my age and it’s also extremely helpful and I love them so very much. But it just sorta hits in a different way coming from an older friend. Not in a way that’s better or worse. Just different.)

Also something something seeing that you have a future when you can’t see past the next year or six months is just. So fucking reassuring.

Also. Older friends are just plain fun. I love my older friends and my life would be so much poorer without them. So yknow. Fuck people that condemn intergenerational friendships.

Also also something something something ‘fuck you for making me feel terrible/paranoid about wanting to offer my own experience to those younger than me. To help them in any way I can. As another fantastic and dearly beloved friend says. “If you start sounding like my mental illness, YOU are the problem and maybe need to re-evaluate some things.”’

#ignore me #im just all up in my feels about that time my friend twisted around from the passenger seat of the car to hold my hand and comfort me while #I was crying and terrified about the upcoming semester. that said it IS actually not good that you’re having panic attacks and chest pains #just thinking about going back. and was so kind and understanding and calm and she listened and held my hand. or the other friend who grew #up with little financial security. worked two jobs to pay her college tuition because her parents just didn’t have the means to help her. #and now she’s married to a surgeon and EXTREMELY financially secure and because of her own experience she is just soooo. im gonna pay for #your dinner because I can and it won’t affect me or stress me at all and I want you to save your money. and if you need money for some #reason just let me know and we’ll figure it out because I have the means to help in this way and I’m gonna do it dammit and if you need to #or the friend that sincerely told me to call her if I needed someone to talk to. even if it’s the ass crack of dawn or 3 in the morning. #or my friend (my Person) who when I asked if it was okay to tell my cousin her address while visiting her so my cousin could pick me for #dinner. said ‘of course you can. this is your home too’ (home as in your safe here and home as in you are loved here and home as in you will #always be welcome here.) #like…just. intergenerational friendships guys #they are literally lifesaving #don’t deny young people these friendships #but as someone who has also been the Older Friend #don’t make them feel bad for just loving and caring about another human being #that’s what we do. that’s what humanity is #i scream into the void #personal