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the-insomniac-emporium · 3 years

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Serenade (Daniela Dimitrescu/Reader) Pt. 9

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: T for language + mentions of sensitive topics Warnings: Referenced past abuse. Does not go into detail. Notes: Longest Serenade chapter yet at 4k+ words! Bit of angst, majority is fluffy fluffer fluff though. Next chapter is maximum h*rny, with two versions depending on reader, uh, equipment. EDIT: Forgot to put title, like dumbass. Past Chapters: Pt. 1: Nocturne, Pt. 2: Overture, Pt. 3: Accelerando, Pt. 4: Toccata, Pt. 5: Poco a Poco, Pt. 6: Elegy, Pt. 7: Harmony, Pt. 8: Obbligato

Chapter 9: Berceuse

(Berceuse: A lullaby. Generally slow and undulating.)

One moment you’re playing the piano, lovingly demonstrating a song you’d like Daniela to learn, the next you’re blue screening as she places a teasing kiss to your neck. It takes all of your willpower to keep playing, improvising a way to end the song right then and there. Then you’re turning to Daniela, eyes wide, blushing hard. She’s giggling. When she regains her composure, you give her a confused expression.

“I’m pretty sure this is the first time you’ve made real eye contact with me all morning. What gives?” She asked, frowning slightly. Awkwardly rubbing the back of your neck, you avoid her gaze, doing little else than proving her point. This frustrates her, and she lets out an aggravated sigh. I should probably tell her what happened, you think, dreading the idea. Still, the two of you had been making an effort to communicate better. What kind of partner would you be if you didn’t tell her about her mother’s intervention?

“Okay, okay… I wasn’t sure how to bring this up, but if I’m being this obvious about it anyway…” You started, trailing off anxiously. In response, Daniela places one of her hands over yours, giving you a reassuring squeeze. Though your face somehow gets even redder, the action gives you the courage required to continue. “I had another progress update meeting with your mother yesterday. I was worried, since this was the first one where you weren’t present, but I didn’t- I mean, er… Fuck it, she knows you’re interested in me. Doesn’t think we’re already together, thank God, but she told me, and I quote, that my response should be ‘swift and uninterested’. What are-” before you can finish you’re cut off by a loud groan, followed by your girlfriend cradling her head in her hands. Yeah, you think, this is about what I expected.

“Of course she did! I can’t have anything nice,” Daniela snapped, having gone from ten to sixty real quick. You’re just glad that she wasn’t taking it out on the piano. “How would she even know about us? I only stare at you when she’s not looking!” Oh? Since when did she stare at you? Certainly if Lady Dimitrescu had noticed, you would have as well?... Then again, the few times where all three of you were in the same room usually involved you working while they chatted or ate together. Still, the idea of Daniela making heart eyes at you from across the room was enough to make you blush again. “Look, she’s probably making some assumptions. There’s no way she knows as much as she thinks she does, at least not about us. So let’s just be careful- ugh, I sound like Bela- and otherwise keep doing what we do. Alright, songbird?”

“If you’re sure, then so am I. Let’s try to focus on our lesson for now, though,” you replied, doing your best to sound confident. Hoping to add in a little reassurance, you give Daniela a quick peck on the cheek. Unsurprisingly she ‘dodges’, instead kissing you on the lips, but you hardly mind at all. When she pulls back she’s got a huge grin on her face.

“Lesson now, fun later, got it. Speaking of later… You and me, inside the library, right after lunch. I’ll tell mother we’re going over theory and key recognition, but really-” she leans in close, mouth barely an inch from your ear “it’s a date. Don’t worry about getting caught, I’ve already made sure that neither Bela nor Cassandra will interrupt.” Your heart skipped a few beats at her suggestion, and you had to admit… you were beyond excited for this. When was the last time you had gone on an actual date? Years ago, just a month before you left your hometown and moved to the village. That had been a date you’d spend the rest of your life regretting… then again, it was what made you leave in the first place. And if you hadn’t left, you’d have never met Daniela.

Maybe it hadn’t been that bad after all.

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Four minutes past one in the morning, you shuffled nervously towards the library, with note cards in hand. Even if you weren’t really going to help Daniela study, you wanted to be prepared in case you bumped into anyone along the way. After all, this was the night shift, when most of the servants were up and about, accomplishing any tasks deemed ‘too noisy’ to be done while the manor occupants slept. Thankfully, the fact that lunch had just finished meant a fair amount of workers would be busy cleaning up the dining hall. In the end, you only passed one other servant, but it was the only one you hadn’t felt confident about running into: Daphne.

Despite your long-standing friendship (having known each other in the village, and being brought to the castle within the same week), you had yet to tell her about your relationship with Daniela. Which by itself wouldn’t have been too bad, if not for the fact that she could tell you were hiding something from her. This had, understandably, put a damper on your friendship. From her perspective, there was nothing you shouldn’t be able to tell her. Even you weren’t sure if you should be more honest, all things considered. There was no way she’d ever tell someone else about your situation. But if one day you got in trouble for lying to Lady Dimitrescu… and somehow someone figured out that Daphne knew too, well, she’d be just as fucked as you, if not more so. After all, there was a chance that Daniela’s affection for you would lead to a lighter punishment. Not that being exiled into the forest was much better than being flat out killed.

So when you saw Daphne heading towards you, you tried to get by with a simple smile and a brief wave.

“Aren’t you even going to say hi?” Daphne asked, tone stiff but filled with disappointment. It catches you off guard, to the point where you drop your note cards. Immediately you’re squatting down, gathering them up, taking the excuse not to look at your friend. She doesn’t move to assist, instead pausing in the hallway to watch you. “We were supposed to stick together, you know? But it’s like becoming Lady Daniela’s little plaything made you think you’re better than the rest of us. Better than me.” That last part was barely more than a whisper, and you freeze in place, hand still hovering over one of the cards. “I shouldn’t have said anything, it doesn’t matter. Just try not to get yourself killed, alright? I don’t want to be the one to clean up your corpse.”

“Daphne, wait, please!” You said, finally moving to your feet, blocking your friend’s path. When she looks at you, you can just barely make out tears in the corners of her soft blue eyes. “I’m sorry, really. I… I can’t tell you what’s going on because I can’t risk getting you in trouble. You’re my best friend, Daph, and I don’t want anything happening to you just because I was doing something reckless.”

“Do you really think I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you?” Daphne questioned, with a bitter laugh. She’s shaking her head in disbelief, even as you stare at her, shell shocked. “Maybe the others haven’t caught on yet, but I’ve seen the way she looks at you, and I’m not oblivious to the way you talk about her. I figured you’d tell me eventually… It’s been weeks, though. More than that, I mean seriously, don’t you think I’d go down for you in a heartbeat? There was a time where I was sure the two of us would do anything for each other, ride or die when the dying part was a guaranteed end to all of this. Something tells me that’s not the case anymore.” Now she refuses to meet your gaze, instead staring down at what few note cards still lay on the floor.

“That’s still the case, I promise. It’s hard enough to look past what our employers do to strangers. If they hurt you? I’d never dream of forgetting, let alone forgiving them,” you explained. It’s enough to make her look back up, but she’s far from smiling.

“If that’s the case, maybe I’m looking at the wrong signals. But I’ve got to go, and I assume you do too. Take care,” she said, before slipping past you as quickly as she can. Then you’re left to gather the last of your note cards, mind whirling. Cruel as the thought may be, you hoped that this wouldn’t ruin the mood for your date. The best your mind could do to cope was focus on one thing at a time…

————————————

“Are you sure this is safe? I can’t even remember how many times I’ve been told to keep this door shut, under the threat of, you know, losing my life,” you called out, hanging out in the doorway. Beyond you by a few meters was Daniela, who twirled about with laughter, reaching out to catch a few falling leaves. This was the entrance to the garden, as far as you could tell. Not to be confused with the vineyard, which was larger, as well as on a completely different side of the estate. You had never been to either, seeing as only a select few servants were allowed to leave the manor. If Daniela hadn’t made it seem like you’d be staying in the library, well, you probably would have protested a little, regardless of how badly you wanted to go on a real date. Even when you had met up with her, she hadn’t told you any details, just laughing and asking you to follow her.

“Don’t be a baby! We’re still a few weeks away from autumn, and besides, you’re here with me! What could possibly go wrong?” Daniela asked, sending you a cheeky grin before dashing off into the garden proper. For a moment you’re left on the threshold, a picnic basket in your arms, wondering what the season had to do with your safety. Then you sigh, figuring that it couldn’t be that bad. Hadn’t your girlfriend mentioned this to Bela, anyway? Certainly the responsible older sister would have stepped in if something genuinely dangerous had been suggested? Well, you hoped as much, at least. With that in mind you close the door behind you, then dashed towards where Daniela had gone. Even as you round the corner, you don’t see her, and suddenly you’re nervous as hell. Before you can call out to her, the sound of rustling leaves catches your attention. Suddenly something jumps out at you! “Rah! Gotcha, babe!”

Ah, of course it was your girlfriend, clearly pulling a leaf from Cassandra’s book. You playfully smack her arm in response, trying to ignore the way your heart pounded. Humorous intentions aside, she had legitimately scared you, and you had nearly dropped your basket in response. Before you can say as much, Daniela’s hooking her arm in yours so she can pull you further into the gardens.

“You’re lucky you’re so fucking cute, firefly,” you muttered, a tad grumpy now. Most of your irritation was false, however, intended to tease your girlfriend. For a moment she doesn’t seem to realize that, and she stops in place. Once her eyes meet yours she understands what’s going on. Then she’s grinning, sticking her tongue out at you, and continuing down the path. Soon enough you’re approaching a paved brick circle. All around it, minus where it meets the walkway, are various flowers in bloom. Past the flowers are bushes, and past those are trees, whose branches provide a canopy for the circle. “Wow… and I thought you were pretty,” you teased, admiring the view.

As soon as the words leave your mouth, Daniela lets out an offended scoff, before taking the basket from you. Wordlessly she opens it up to grab the blankets within, spreading them without sparing you a glance. Now it’s your turn to wonder whether or not her anger is just a joke. Hoping so, you help her smooth out the blankets, making sure the two of you have ample space to spread out. At one point both of you reach for the basket at the same time, and she just grabs your hand instead, squeezing it. Next thing you know she’s pulling you down onto the blankets, rolling on top of you.

“Come here often?” She asked. Then, unsurprisingly, the two of you kiss. Both of your arms wrap around her waist, holding her as close as you can. One of her hands cups your cheek, the other resting on the ground to support herself, for ‘optimal makeout angles’. It’s a minute of bliss before she has to pull back for air. Instead of pulling away entirely, she shifts down a notch, resting her head against your chest. “Mmm… so comfortable. I could just… fall… asleep…” Daniela murmured, pretending to be sleepy. You can’t help but laugh, chest obviously shaking in as you do. “No! Pillows aren’t supposed to vibrate.”

“Are you sure about that?” You asked, only laughing harder.

“They don’t talk, either,” Daniela replied, huffing as she does. When you keep laughing, she rises to a sitting position, much to your disappointment. “So you have chosen death? So be it. I’ll just eat these candies myself, then.” With that said, she digs into the picnic basket, retrieving a bag of chocolates. Pouting, you reach out to try and yoink one away from her. Rather deftly, she pulls them away, sticking her tongue out at you before tossing a couple in her mouth. Determined, you surge forward, trying to catch her off guard, only to (somehow) end up face down in her lap. “Exactly like I planned, songbird. Now get comfy, alright?”

One of her hands trails fingers through your hair as you semi-awkwardly roll over. Now you’re facing up, watching your girlfriend practically inhale a few pieces of chocolate. But now she seems more inclined to share. She plucks one more from the bag, offering it to you by holding it in front of your mouth. Gladly you open up, and she drops the chocolate, before giving you a small ‘boop’ on the nose. Both of you laugh, then, a sound that sparks warmth in your chest. This was… nice. Relaxing. Not only were the two of you allowed to be as open with your affection as you wanted, it was the first time in ages that you had actually been outside, able to enjoy the sunlight.

Several minutes pass by like this, with Daniela feeding you (and herself) candies, both of you taking time to appreciate the scenery. Eventually the bag of chocolates becomes close to empty, and you see your girlfriend have an ‘oh crap’ moment.

“I was going to save some of these for you to smuggle into your quarters, damn it… guess you’ll just have to refuse to share, babe,” she said, shrugging a little. Then she sets the bag aside, now devoting both of her hands to playing with your hair. “Guess I’ll just have to find something else to keep my tongue occupied. Know any volunteers?”

“Hmm… I would, but it’s reeeaaaaaallllllly comfortable down here,” you teased in reply. Suddenly her hands are taken out of your hair, and you can just barely see that they’re positioned on her hips. She’s pouting at you, very similar to how you’ve seen her mother do, yellow eyes betraying her mischief. What exactly did she have planned?

“Really, songbird? I take you out, give you a wonderful place to rest, hand feed you chocolates… and you won’t even kiss me? When was the last time you even got to do something like this?” She asked, perking an eyebrow. The question is innocent enough. The answer, however, is not. Even with your head in her lap, you cannot fight off the brief sense of panic as your mind flashes into the past. It takes a deep breath, a few blinks, and a reassuring touch from Daniela for you to calm back down. “Songbird?... Hey, hey, it’s okay, I didn’t- I don’t know what happened. But we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, we can just…” She trails off, sounding unsure of herself, and you feel a pang of guilt. Was it finally time to come clean?... Yeah, yeah it was.

“It’s fine, I promise. I just… I need to sit up for this,” you explained, begrudgingly rising out of her lap. But she doesn’t let you pull away entirely, a hand guiding you to sit right up against her. Then she gently wraps an arm around you. Leaning into her touch, you rest your head on her shoulder, closing your eyes for a few seconds. “It’s kind of a long story, firefly… But this has happened often enough that I need to tell you. At least part of it. So, well… When I was younger, I, uh, I read a lot of romance novels, watched a lot of movies. Not even the good ones, really. And I didn’t- I couldn’t think through them. Couldn’t analyze it the way I needed to. So I didn’t get a good grasp of what a healthy relationship looked like. My, uh, my folks weren’t keen on demonstrating one for me, either…

“Before I came to the village, I was, well, uh, the thing is you might not like this part? And you’re not gonna like the next part, either. Just… listen to the end, please,” you pleaded, waiting for an acknowledgment before continuing. “I was engaged, as in to be married, to a woman I had known for most of my life. We were neighbors, and had gone to school together, and everyone thought we were the cutest couple. Hell, for the longest time I thought that. We weren’t, though. She was-” Daniela tenses a bit, though remains silent- “manipulative, sometimes aggressive. Anytime there was an argument, she made herself into the victim, told me that I was crazy. She wanted to make all the decisions about our relationship for me, and I just… I didn’t question it. Not even after she proposed, when my only reason for saying yes was because we were in public, with friends, and she clearly assumed that I’d agree. I tried to tell her that I wasn’t ready, that maybe we were going too fast, but she tuned me out.

“I didn’t even think about running until our final date. That was the first, and the only, time that she ever… that she ever-” a few tears spill from the corners of your eyes- “got physical with me. She’d broken things before, for sure, but I never thought she’d hurt me.” Daniela rubs your back gently, her breathing a little shaky. Evidently she hated hearing about this as much as you hated talking about it. Somehow that made it a little easier to talk through. “The next day she had to work early, so I just packed up my things, went over to my parents’ house and told them what happened. For once they actually agreed, if you can believe it. Told me to get the hell out of town, said that they’d deal with my fiance, and our relatives, so that I didn’t have to worry about anything when I came back. It was less than a full day before I drove away from everything I had ever known, promising my folks that someday I’d be back. Didn’t settle down until half the continent was behind me, not ‘til I was here at the village.”

There were a couple moments of silence as Daniela waited to make sure you had finished talking. Then she’s kissing the top of your head, shaking a little more noticeably now, murmuring reassurances that you can’t quite understand. Again you lean into her touch, indescribably thankful for her comforting presence. Fuck, you think, I probably ruined the date… so much for spending quality time with my lil firefly. When the silence breaks, it does so softly, slowly, a careful opening rather than a forceful push.

“Why would you give me a second chance? After what I did to you?” Daniela asked, voice barely audible, her head still resting atop yours. It’s not the response you expected. Not in the slightest. You pull away slightly, to look her in her eyes, heart aching at the tear stains on her cheeks. Even though you want to give her an answer that will bring her peace, your mind draws little more than a blank. Why had you given her a chance? You had wanted to be with her, without doubt, even before Cassandra and Bela intervened. Even after every time that she reminded you of your past…

“I-I don’t know. Maybe I haven’t learned anything from what’s happened,” you started, uncertainty clear in your tone. “Or maybe it’s because you looked… regretful. You didn’t enjoy what you did, and I saw it in your eyes. And… and then you did something about it. If you hadn’t shown remorse, or if I genuinely believed that you might do something like that again, we wouldn’t be here right now. I mean, in that case your sisters probably would have killed me for turning you down, but that’s not entirely relevant right now, is it?” You’re rambling a little, stuttering over your own words. Still, somehow it makes Daniela laugh, and relief floods your chest. Soon enough you’re curled up against her once more.

“Hey,” she said, after a minute of comfortable silence. “Thank you for showing me what romance is supposed to be.” Then she’s leaning in for a kiss, and you’re responding eagerly, unable to stop yourself from smiling. This time it’s your hand that runs through her hair as you pull her in as close as you can. To your surprise, she does pull away a tad earlier than usual. But there’s a grin on her lips, and she looks satisfied as hell. “Definitely more of that, soon. There’s just one more thing we have to do, to make this date perfect, you know? I may or may not have, kind of, written you something? You’re not allowed to laugh, though!”

“When have I ever laughed at you?” You asked, teasing, literally laughing as you speak. In response, Daniela scowls, making a point to look away in feign protest. “Joking, joking… I’ve just, you know, never had someone write me something before. Kinda don’t know how to react, really. Other than blushing real hard-” which you were doing- “and trying to play off my excitement with humor. But I promise I won’t laugh, even if you start with something like ‘roses are red, violets are blue’ or end with something like ‘just us in bed, doing the do’. Please tell me that’s not what you wrote, though?”

“Now that you mention it, maybe that should be what I recite. Sounds exactly like the sort of thing that would get me laid,” Daniela joked, rolling her eyes at you. Then she’s tugging a loose piece of paper out of the picnic basket, unfolding it to reveal a well-worn surface and hand-written text. She hesitates for a moment, glancing up at you, before taking a deep breath. When she speaks it’s clear just how nervous she is. But with every line she gains a measure of confidence, by the end acting her usual confident self.

Step from the shadows, weary corners of my mind Encased in old thoughts, brought into new life Like ashes rising from tombs housing the divine

Spinning webs as I descend, from the cradle of heaven From the dead I have risen, blessed be the gift I’m given Only from your haunting call do I embrace living

Catching the corners of my lips turning up All my years I’ve felt, but never this much Quietly writhing, begging for your softest touch

The pursuit of unintentional romance left abandoned Whispering love-locked tales to be consumed Sweeter than every facade I have ever imagined

Come closer now, into my arms, heart embraced Trailing fingers over scars, sewing lines traced Tell me love, “we shall last until the end of days”

At first, all you can do in response is stare at her, expression filled with affection. Inside your chest your heart was racing, and you couldn’t remember the last time you felt this warm. Reaching out, you take one of Daniela’s hands in your own, grinning as soon as her gaze meets yours. Both of you are blushing rather hard. Then she sets the poem down, eyes never leaving yours for even a second. You try to stutter out a few words, but find your tongue tied, and so you settle for placing your forehead against hers. The two of you stay like that for a few loving moments. When you part, it is only to come back together, this time in a tight hug.

“One helluva date, yeah?” Daniela asked, looking incredibly proud of herself. You can’t help but nod enthusiastically in response, honestly happier than you had felt in years. “Well, I will have to let you get back to work soon, unfortunately… but we have a few minutes, at least. Besides, having to part will only make tonight all the more sweeter.” At that you pause, confused, tilting your head to the side. Realizing that she must have gotten ahead of herself, Daniela blushes before elaborating. “You, me, my room. Tonight, right after your shift ends.”

You could hardly wait.

#daniela dimitrescu #daniela dimitrescu x reader #resident evil: village #re8 village #please tell me if the poem is any good #seriously pleaaaaaaseeeee #or just tell me what your favorite line from the whole chap is #that's always what I want to know #feedback wise

201 notes · View notes

kiribaku-queen · 3 years

Note

Hi! Could you please do a Kuroo x reader please! He’s gone away on a work trip for a couple of weeks and he decides to come back early to surprise her? But when he gets home late at night he sees her in the bedroom with Kenma or Bokuto (someone he’s close with) hugging and they fall onto the bed? (Looks suss as fuck), but really the person was just comforting her because she was missing him and she was crying about it? Kuroo ends up coming to blows with the person being all like “how could you” and she has to step in and explain the whole situation? Basically angst with a fluffy ending?

If you aren’t comfortable doing it with a Haikyuu character maybe Todoroki and Midoriya or someone like that? Or maybe doing the MHA one as well as the Haikyuu one? Up to you I’m easy I’ll be happy with whatever you write hahaha fml

Surprise

Pairing: Kuroo x reader

Angst

Word count: 4.7K

A/N: Oof, it’s about time that I uploaded this one. I promise, the others are coming out! Slowly but surely! I was really excited to start this one though because the scenario was so easy to follow and see in my head. I’m sorry if you think the reader is annoying or too clingy. Reader is a sensitive soul in this one. I hope it’s angsty enough for you and I’d love to know your thoughts on this one, anon! Happy reading!

This isn’t what you wanted.

You didn’t like this one bit.

“It’s only 2 weeks,” your boyfriend tried to comfort you as you pouted in the corner.

“2 weeks too long,” you said angrily, arms crossed over your chest and with permanent frown that doesn’t look like it’s going to go away any time soon. Kuroo laughs at your reaction, looking absolutely adorable to him. He pinches your cheek in hopes that that will cheer you up, but obviously it doesn’t.

“Stop being so pouty,” he laughs and you just glare up at him.

“If you didn’t leave me, then I won’t be so pouty,” you jutted your bottom lip out to emphasize how much you’re going to dread the time away from him.

“You can survive without me for 2 weeks,” Kuroo’s pinch on your cheeks turns into a soft caress to the touch. You lean into his touch until you let his hand cover your face to allow you to take in his scent. It was comforting. The smell of him. The way he feels. Fuck, you were really going to miss him.

“I’ll miss you,” you whisper into the palm of his hands. Kuroo chuckles, picking you up so that you were sitting in his lap. He brings your face close to him so that your noses were touching but not quite your lips.

“You know I’ll miss you too,” Kuroo whispers against your lips that were ready to be kissed any second now.

Truth be told, 2 weeks was not a long time for some people. But for you, 2 weeks was going to feel a suffocating 2 months. Ever since you started dating your boyfriend, you were never really separated from each other. You met in college and spend all your time together, forgetting about your other friends. And then you found out that you both live in the same hometown so when you went home, you guys were still together so no need to worry about long distance. The longest you’ve been apart from each other was probably a weekend, at most. So it’s no surprise that you started to get attached. Unhealthy, you know. But who could blame you? You both loved being around each other so much that you never saw it as a problem. But because of that and with the situation you are facing now, you started feeling anxious about him leaving you by yourself.

You didn’t know what it was. Were you feeling this way because you think he was going to cheat on you? Was it the fear eating you up that he was going to find someone better? Or was it that he was going to have fun somewhere else while you were at home miserable? It could be a mixture of all of them, if you were being completely honest with yourself.

But you knew he had to go. It was work related, you can’t keep him from working. But the thought that he was still leaving you for a good amount of time was upsetting and a bit painful. Kuroo sensed that you weren’t going to lighten up ant time soon. So he cupped your cheeks and placed a light kiss on your lips.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he reassures you again but his comfort wasn’t enough to convince you to feel any better.

“How about this? When I come back, I’ll give you all the kisses to makeup for the time being away plus more if you want,” Kuroo tried to reason with you. And it was tempting.

“Why can’t I have it now?” you gave him puppy eyes plus the pout on your lips. He chuckles again and gives you one quick kiss.

“How was that? Will that last you for 2 weeks?” he asks and you shake your head.

“How about… this one?” and he pulls you in for a deeper kiss. But that still didn’t suffice.

“No? Okay, what about now?” and he kisses both sides of your cheeks.

“Or this one?” now he’s kissing your nose. Then your forehead. Then your chin. Your hands and your neck. Back to your lips multiple times.

“Are you getting sick of me yet?” he teases, the distance of each kiss getting shorter and shorter until both of your lips refuse to leave each other. Kuroo is hugging your waist tight and pulling you closer if that was even physically possible anymore. You could feel his muscles through his shirt and it was taking every inch of you to not further the contact. Both of you got lost in the few minutes you had left together, not wanting to break away first. But he had to go eventually. Kuroo breaks the kiss, leaning your foreheads together.

“I have to go,” he whispers, still breathless from your intimate moment. Anxiety rising in you again because the moment is finally here. Being the good boyfriend that he was, he takes your hand in his as you walk to the front door together. Suitcase in hand and yours in the other.

The front door opens and the tears are already spilling out. Kuroo’s eyes soften at the sight and pulls you in for the final hug before he leaves. You couldn’t look at him because if you did, you knew you couldn’t let him go. What you didn’t know though, is that as soon as he saw you cry, he was doing the same thing. But he had to hold it in for you.

“I’ll be back before you know it, I promise. I’ll call you every night so you can see this handsome face before you go to bed,” Kuroo tries lightening the mood with a joke but it was hard when he was getting choked up.

“Hm,” you hummed back, hugging him harder to imprint the feeling of his touch in your memory.

“I love you,” he says and kisses the top of your head. He was going to miss you just as much. But work was work. Right before he pulls away from your hug, you kiss him once more and this time you were in the lead.

“I love you too,” you tell him when you break the kiss. Your boyfriend smirks and smothers your face with small smooches. Goodness, you two really couldn’t get enough of each other. Kuroo would be with you even down to the last second.

Okay, now it’s really time that he had to go.

“If you need anything, you know you can call me. I love you. See you in 2 weeks, love,” Kuroo says his final final goodbyes. You nod your head and watch him walk down the hallway until you couldn’t see him anymore. He looks back and you’re still watching him, waving every time he looks across his shoulder. And then he was gone. For 2 weeks. What were you going to do now?

You cried. That’s what you did. The second you closed the door, you broke down in front of the door. Call you dramatic but you couldn’t help but feel that way. You tried to distract yourself by working more, starting a new show, cooking more often, cleaning… but everything reminded you of him. God, it wasn’t like he was dying or breaking up with you. He was going to be back in the 2 weeks like he promised. But it was just making you miss him more. You just couldn’t wait until it was time for him to come home so you could feel at peace.

You cried every day the first week he was gone. Every phone call at night, Kuroo could see that. And he was beating himself up for it because he couldn’t do anything to help you. But you appreciated that he took time out of his night to give you an least an hour long phone call. You caught up about your day and comforting each other through the phone. It wasn’t much, but you’d take this any day than nothing at all.

Kuroo was good at keeping his promise the first week. He called you every night, no matter how tired he was. During the second week, he calls started getting shorter. And shorter. And shorter. Until he was only on call for a couple of minutes. He always used the excuse that he was busy or he had to be with his coworkers. Bullshit. You could tell that they were drinking. He wasn’t working at all. He just wanted to hang out with his coworkers. Who works at 10 o’clock at night after they just finished a whole shift?

Some phone calls were the same; just talking about how you miss each other. This call was different though. It was another quick phone call that night. He began talking about his day: what he did, what he ate, plans after work. You didn’t say much about your day because it was so uneventful without him there.

“Are you going out again?” you ask, your chin rested on your pillow as you facetimed your boyfriend.

“Mm,” he hummed back and he could see the disappointed, or rather, annoyed look on your face. “You know I can’t refuse them. They’re my superiors. If they say drink, I have to.” He tried to explain. Yeah, you knew that. You wished your culture wasn’t like that but there wasn’t anything to be done.

“Hey Kuroo! Ready to go?” you saw some of his coworkers barge in on your call. Kuroo happily smiles at them, giving each one a pound hug as a greeting. From what you could see on the screen, all his coworkers were male, so you guess that was a relief.

“Oh yeah. This is my girlfriend, (y/n),” Kuroo doesn’t fail to introduce you to his new friends. They all try to say hi to you. There was so many of them, that they had to take turns sharing the screen. You smile back, not saying much because now all of Kuroo’s attention was on his friends. You just watched as he interacted with them.

“Alright, boys! Who’s ready to party!?” you hear a woman in the background barge through the door behind the boys. All of Kuroo’s coworkers head towards the woman, forgetting that they were even talking to you. Kuroo, too, was looking in her direction. She came into view and holy mother of Jesus was she gorgeous. A business woman who knows how to dress herself to look elegant and classy yet sexy at the same time. All attention was on her now, like she was the life of the party. And that made you nervous.

Kuroo was with a big group of people. It wasn’t like he was just going drinking with her. But she was all you could think about. The single fact that she was present and was a part of that group didn’t sit well in your stomach. You didn’t want to think it, but you did. What if Kuroo starts to take a liking to her? What if he cheats on you? If she dances up on him, will he let her? Or would he be loyal and tell her that he has a girlfriend? Maybe all your fears will disappear when he introduces her to you. You were about to ask about her when Kuroo suddenly speaks up.

“Okay, babe. I gotta go. I love you, talk to you later,” Kuroo sends you a flying kiss.

“Oh, okay. By-” but before you could even finish what you were going to say, he cuts you off and now you were looking at a blank screen. You stared at your computer screen, appalled and shocked at what just happened. You continued to stare at the screen until it turned black, your reflection staring right back at you. Tears were welding in your eyes as you were overwhelmed with emotion at the moment.

You spend that night staring at your ceiling, silent tears streamed down your face. You missed him dearly, wanting nothing more than for him to be in bed with you and cuddle. But Kuroo clearly looked like he was having the time of his life. This was what you feared. He was having fun while you were at home feeling sorry for yourself.

You knew that he would never cheat on you. Deep down, you knew that. But a small voice in your mind was telling you dark lies, tricking you into believing that he was. These thoughts lingered for days. The thought of him and her together ate at you alive. You never felt so down in your life and it was at that moment that you needed him the most only for him to not be reachable. This feeling was unhealthy and you needed to do something about it. Talk about it. To somebody, anybody. And there was only one person who you could trust.

Picking up the phone and searching their name in a flash, you waited for your trusty friend to answer the phone. And as always, their voice always made you smile just a little bit.

“Hey, hey, hey! How’s my crybaby doing?” his booming voice teased you but you found it hard to take that lightly. “Too soon?” he asked after a long pause of silence. You hummed into the phone and began tearing up again. Why? Because he was right, you were a crybaby. And you were calling him because you wanted to cry and pour your heart out to him. He could hear your whimpering over the phone and his tone of voice instantly changed from teasing to concerned.

“Hey, hey, hey… are you okay?” he asks softly. You can’t see it but his thick brows were furrowed into a frown.

“No. Can… Can you come over? I really need somebody right now,” you asked, hoping that you weren’t going to be rejected. That would make you feel even worse. Luckily for you, Bokuto was already on his way.

“Be there in 30.”

You waited for Bokuto in your living room, practically shaking from anxiety. You met Bokuto through Kuroo. It was only a matter of time before you met your boyfriend’s best friend from high school. And then it was only natural that you two became really good friends. You went to him for everything. The gossip, the drama, the comfort, the hype, literally everything. Kuroo wasn’t one to gas you up in certain situations, but you could always count on Bokuto to. It was only natural for you to call him to come comfort you during hard times. Knowing who Bokuto was, he already has a plan to cheer you up already.

Three knocks sounded through the apartment. You shot up from your seat and rushed to open the door. Bokuto was standing there with groceries and wine in hand. He lifted both hands, showing up the items that he brought.

“Will this cheer you up?” he asks, giving you an uncertain smile. You nod your head and since his hands were already open for you, you just went in for a hug. Bokuto didn’t hesitate you hug you back even tighter, securing you in his arms. He wasn’t Kuroo, but a hug is what you really needed.

“Let’s cook you something up to eat and then we can drink our sorrows away. Sound like a plan?” Bokuto suggested.

“I really need that right now,” you say. Yeah, this is what you needed.

The night was spent eating a simple, yet delicious meal Bokuto managed to whip up real quick and pouring out your feelings to the man. Almost a whole bottle of wine was gone, it was sad that he didn’t bring another one. You felt like you were going to need it. Bokuto sat there, sipping on his wine, and listening to everything you had to say. He gave reactions and advice when necessary but was great at letting you say everything that was on your chest.

Laughs were shared here and there, but Bokuto did a great job at making your forget about why you ever were sad in the first place. Shit, if it was this easy to make you feel better, you would have asked for Bokuto’s help a long time ago.

“Bokuto, literally stop!” you laugh, slapping his hand away from you to prevent him from poking your side again.

“If you stop crying, I’ll stop!” he proposed and continued to poke you. You laughed even harder and ran away from him.

“I’m crying from laughter! Not because I’m sad!” you yelled, trying to escape from the mad man.

“Tears are still tears! GET RID OF THEM!” Bokuto yelled back, picking up speed which freaked you out. You ran into the bedroom but unfortunately, that slowed you down and you felt Bokuto’s arms wrap around your waist.

“Got’cha!” he said as he captured you. Both of you burst your stomachs from laughing but he wasn’t done with you just yet. “You ready?”

“For what?” you asked in between breaths.

“This!”

“NO BOKUTO, DON’T!” you squeal but it was too late. With a grunt, Bokuto lifts you in the air and when you land, your back in his arms but this time, he has one arm under your legs and one arm supporting your back like a princess. You wrap your arm around his neck in instinct so you don’t fall. But you didn’t think anything of it. Neither of you did. You both just burst into a laughing fit once again.

Kuroo enjoyed the 2 weeks he was away for his business trip. Not only did he gain new experiences and make connections for future deals, but he also made a deeper connection with his coworkers. He’ll admit, the constant drinking and partying was getting old. He wasn’t in college anymore. He can’t stay up all night and drink until he passes out. He’d much rather be in bed sleeping with you wrapped in his arms. He could stay longer, after all, his company did pay for a few extra days after the convention to relax. But he didn’t want to relax. He wanted to get back to you as soon as possible. And that’s what he was going to do.

He thanked his boss for the hospitality, but he just wanted to go home now. It’s been too long and he missed you too much to stay. Also, the thought of you being alone and crying pained him to no end. There wasn’t a day, a single moment, that he didn’t think about you. So, with his boss’ permission, he went home a few days early. No he didn’t tell you. It was going to be a surprise. The thought of seeing your face when he’s come early, it’s already making him smile.

When he unlocks the door to your shared apartment, the first thing he sees are that the lights are open. Perfect, you were home. And he opened the door as softly as he could so that you couldn’t hear. For the surprise effect, of course.

Then he sees the dining table. Oh, you are already? That’s good. At least you weren’t skipping meals. Did you have someone over? Why were there two sets of plates? And wine? Kuroo took a closer look. One glass was definitely yours. You lip stains were all over it. So whose was the other one?

Then he hears laughter that breaks his heart. Your laugh. Mixed with another that was all too familiar. You. Him. Dinner. Wine? Laughing? And it was coming from the bedroom. The pieces were all coming together.

With a heavy heart, Kuroo walks closer to the noise coming from the bedroom. He couldn’t believe it. From down the hall, he could see clear as day. You were in Bokuto’s arms. The arms of his best friend. He was carrying you like how he imagined he would on your wedding day. You had the widest smile, like how he imagined you would when you find out that you would be pregnant with your first child together. Bokuto was making you laugh until your stomach hurt like how he wanted to, even when you guys grow old together. But now he felt like his world was crashing down on him. All those dreams and hopes he pictured for years was disintegrating right before his eyes. He wanted to cry out and go insane. But there was no time for that. Kuroo went up to the couple, seeing red.

Bokuto was laughing along with you. That is, until he saw Kuroo storming his direction and he didn’t look too happy. Panic and fear sets in and he quickly puts you down to face the danger coming to him.

“Look, Kuroo. It’s a misunderstanding,” Bokuto tried to stop him to explain but Kuroo wasn’t listening.

“You bastard,” Kuroo cursed through gritted teeth. He grabbed his best friend by the collar, landing a hard punch to the cheek. You gasped, never seeing Kuroo get so violent before. You covered your mouth in disbelief. But Kuroo disregards you. All of his attention was on the owl-eyed man beneath him. If you looked closely, you could see fume coming out of his ears.

“Kuroo, stop!” you scream, grabbing his arm and trying to pull him back. Kuroo rips his arm out of your grip and back on Bokuto’s collar.

“Kuroo Testsurou!” you tried screaming his name, but his is going through tunnel vision.

“You’re supposed to be my best friend. And you pull shit like this when I’m gone? Did you have fun? Was it worth shoving our friendship down the drain after all those years? How long as this been going on, huh? Days? Weeks? Years? Answer me, you asshole!” Kuroo screamed, letting the anger take over him. But Bokuto didn’t get a chance to answer because not only was none of what he was saying was true, but he his priority right now was to get out of his grip.

“KUROO TETSUROU!” You cried at the top of your lungs. It was so loud that you were sure your neighbors were going to give you a noise complaint. That’s when he lets go. Kuroo faces you rather aggressively, making you fear the man that you love.

“And you. You put on a good act,” he started.

“What?” you question, not knowing what he was saying or where he was going with that.

“Are you trying to be an actress? Because I believed every word that came out of your lying, cheating mouth,” he spat at you. Each word stung like someone was physically squeezing your heart until it burst. You didn’t know what he was saying. You start to shake and your vision blurred because of the unfallen tears filling in your eyes. You didn’t know where to look. All you knew was that you couldn’t look at your boyfriend. If he even was your boyfriend at this point.

“I was only gone for 2 weeks. Not even a full 2 weeks. Were you that lonely and in need of someone that you had to fuck my best friend?” he continued to falsely accuse you of something you couldn’t even fathom to do. You wanted to deny it so badly, so why wasn’t anything out of your mouth? You were so frozen in fear that nothing wanted to come out. Bokuto wasn’t having it though. He got up from the floor and it was his turn to grab his best friend by the collar.

“Do not speak to (y/n) like that. You’re not fucking listening. I’m telling you that this is all a misunderstanding!” Bokuto reasoned. But for some reason, Kuroo wasn’t having it.

“Misunderstanding… how is holding my girlfriend in your arms a misunderstanding? In what situation should you EVER hold my girlfriend like that?!” Kuroo started raising his voice, making you jump. You closed your eyes, still frozen in place, in hopes that that will calm you.

“If you calmed down, I can explain! Can’t you see that you’re scaring her?” Bokuto moved to show your shaking body. Upon seeing your current state, Kuroo realized that he fucked up. His anger got the better of him unlike ever before. After seeing his friend relax, Bokuto lets him go and backs away cautiously. If he was going to attack again, he would be prepared this time.

“(y/n), I’m sorry,” Kuroo softly whispered, going to grab your hand. But you flinched backwards, afraid of the man who was in front of you. He wasn’t Kuroo. He wasn’t your boyfriend. Your boyfriend would never act out like this. You look towards Boktuo, the only man you recognized in the room and begged with your eyes to come help you. Of course, he did. He stood in front of you, protecting you from the stranger in your apartment.

Kuroo’s eyes widen at your reaction. He messed up big time didn’t he? He looks down at his hand, in disbelief at his actions. What the hell got into him?

“(y/n),” Kuroo muttered your name to himself. All of a sudden, the palms of his hands were wet. Was he crying? He touched his cheek and it was soaked with tears. Oh, he was crying. How did he not notice?

“Baby, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into me,” Kuroo apologized, wiping more of his tears away that won’t stop falling. You peeked at the stranger from behind Bokuto’s broad shoulders. He was looking more and more like your boyfriend now.

“I missed you,” you managed to say with your throat all scratched up. Kuroo snaps his head up to make eye contact with you. You start to cry harder, but you needed to get out what you wanted to say. “I missed you so much, Kuroo. It was so hard without you here. I felt like I was all by myself in this world. And that you were having so much fun with your coworkers that you didn’t want to come home anymore. Or you would find another girl and realize that your girlfriend is a clingy nobody with no potential to succeed in life.” You sobbed and were surprised that you managed to get all that out in between sobs. It took you a while, but no one stopped you until you were all done.

“Don’t say that. Don’t you ever say that about yourself. I wouldn’t be with you if I knew you couldn’t be your own person. You are successful in your own ways and I’ll always support you in every way that I can. Baby, I missed you so much. I thought about you every day.” He confessed.

“Really?” Not believing his words.

“Really. Day in, day out. You were the only one on my mind. Even when I was working and doing those boring workshops, I always thought about you. I came home early to surprise you because I couldn’t spend another second without you by myside.” You sobbed even harder, covering your face with your hands.

“Kuroo!” you cried, running into his arms. The moment you entered his arms, he engulfed you in a tight hug. Fuck, he missed you. He dug his head in the crook of your neck, taking all of you in. Your scent, your voice, the way you felt in his arms, how your hairs tickled his noise. But he didn’t want to move away any time soon. Because this is what he longed for for 2 weeks. Eventually, you pull away to peck him on the lips.

“God, I missed you,” he whispered against your lips.

“I missed you more,” you say and he kisses you again.

“I love you.” And another kiss.

“And I’m so sorry. I’ll never do that again. Swear on my life,”

“Yeah, that was kind of scary,” you managed to tell a light joke that made Kuroo feel relieved.

“I know, baby. I’m sorry,” he apologizes again and pecks kisses all over your face. You waited 2 weeks for this moment. You grabbed his face and gave him a passionate kiss that he gladly returned back. You were both making out in your bedroom, but someone was still there. Bokuto clears his throat, letting you know that he was still here. Both of you jump in surprise and turn to the man.

“Can I join?” he asks, making you roll your eyes and Kuroo pushing him away.

“Get the fuck out of here, bird man!”

A/N: As always, I’d love to know your thoughts!

#kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsurō #haikyuu kuroo #kuroo tetsuro angst #kuroo oneshot #kuroo imagine #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu #haikyuu angst

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i-write-about-anything · 5 years

Text

Serpent by Association Part 3

Prompt: Something goes south in with the Ghoulies and Serpents and as a way of revenge the Ghoulies take something precious from the Serpents. (You know kind of like in season 2 episode 21 but like everyone is friends because we love a support group)

Pairings: Sweet Pea x Reader, The entire serpent gang x Reader

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 4

Third Person POV

Fangs had woken up only minutes after (y/n), he was devastated when he heard the news of (y/n). Jughead had gotten his ear chewed off by Betty as she told him how reckless he was but what Betty didn’t know is that he would have done it again for (y/n). FP called the Serpents off, all resting in their homes as he and his son, Jughead waited at the hospital for (y/n) to wake up. Sweet Pea hadn’t left (y/n)’s side and even though Fangs was asking for him, he refused to leave, not wanting to be a disappointment once more. His eye swelling up as the time went by. FP had gotten in a heated argument with Sweet Pea, saying he had been irresponsible for leaving (y/n) alone. FP wasn’t done giving him hell and neither was Jughead, his blood still boiling as to what had happened. Two of his closest friends in the hospital for something that didn’t concern them. “What kind of leader am I?” Jughead spoke breaking the silence in the waiting room that contained his father, Archie, Betty, and Veronica.

“What are you talking about son?” FP sighed, rubbing his bruised-up eyes before straightening up his back.

“Fangs got shot, under my supervision. (Y/N) got branded by the Ghoulies. I’m a complete let down.” Jughead sighed taking his beanie off his head, fiddling with it after his hand left Bettys.

“Jug, it’s not your fault man.” Archie sighed putting his hand on Jughead’s back. He instantly shook it off.

“Isn’t it though? If I hadn’t initiated the hit on Penny this wouldn’t have happened to (y/n), if I had just deleted the footage from my camcorder, Fangs wouldn’t have gotten shot. All of this, it’s my fault and I need to own up to it.” Jughead stood up. “Everything that goes wrong is on me and there’s a lot of things that have been going wrong. Joining the Serpents was the worst mistake I've done.” Jughead sighed.

“Look here boy.” FP now on his feet. “We’ve all made mistakes, hell I've ran off your mother and Jellybean but joining the Serpents will never be a mistake. They’re your family and they’ll be willing to die for you at any second of the day. Now (y/n) may not be a Serpent but we’re her family and she’s proven her loyalty time after time. You’re a great leader, a better leader than I've ever been. Don’t beat yourself up because of this, shit happens but both Fangs and (y/n) are living to see another day so quit moping around and be thankful, not a lot of people survive things like that.” FP sighed before storming out of the waiting room, he moved to the room that occupied (y/n) and Sweet Pea. Sweet Pea’s hand still holding onto hers. FP wouldn’t dare admit it himself and he would be dammed if anyone had seen him shed the tears he was shedding now. He hit the wall with his fist, the news of (y/n)’s disappearance had him on the edge and finding out what the Ghoulies and that no good Penny Peabody had done to her tipped him over. He cared for (y/n) the way he did his own daughter, he was there when she came running into his house, tears streaming down her face as she headed straight towards Toni who had been having a conversation with Jughead. She sobbed her words out finding it hard to understand, Sweet Pea running in only a minute after her. FP looked at Sweet Pea, his eyes filled with sorrow which made FP question what the hell was going on. From that day on FP had looked over the girl as his own and there was no way he was going to let anything happen to her, yet here she was, in a hospital bed of Riverdale General. He wiped his tears before he knocked on the door, Sweet Pea looking back at FP before getting up and moving to the door. “I think you should go home, shower and come back. I can take over.” FP sniffed rubbing his thumb on his nose.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Sweet Pea huffed before walking back to the chair, sitting down before taking (y/n)’s hand once more.

“I’m not asking you; I'm telling you. She’ll be fine. I’m here, Jughead is here. Go see Fangs, get your mind out of the possibilities of what could have happened. Fangs needs you too.” FP grabbed Sweet Pea’s arm, lifting him up from the chair before Sweet Pea’s hand separated from (y/n)’s. “I’ve got her now.” FP’s eyes landed on Sweet Pea’s. Sweet Pea sighed and looked at (y/n).

“What if she wakes up and asks for me?” Sweet Pea looked down.

“Then I'll tell her you’re with Fangs, she’ll understand. Plus, Toni is out there, Jughead is out there, there’s a lot of people out there looking out for her, she won’t be alone.” FP let go of his arm, Sweet Pea nodding before leaning down to (y/n)’s forehead, a sweet kiss landing on it. Sweet Pea moved out of the room, hesitant for a second before he closed the door behind him. He moved to Fangs’ room where he saw him sitting up laughing with Toni and Cheryl.

“Sweet Pea.” Fangs smiled. They had been friends for the longest so seeing Sweet Pea was like getting a taste of home.

“We’re just going to go to the waiting room. We can’t wait for you to get out Fangs.” Toni smiled.

“Toodles.” Cheryl smiled before being dragged out by her girlfriend. Sweet Pea walked over the chair next to Fangs, sitting on it before he apologized to Fangs.

“I’m so sorry man.” Sweet Pea sighed putting his head in his hands. “I’ve been preoccupied with (y/n), I’m a shit friend and a shittier boyfriend.” Fangs muffled a laugh causing Sweet Pea to look at him.

“Man, I get it. If I could I'd be with (y/n) too.” Fangs smiled even though the pain he was enduring was unbearable. “Is she okay? Any permanent damage?”

“Yeah, she’s uh, was in a better spirit that she should have been. No permanent damage other than the damn Ghoulie marking they gave her.” Sweet Pea’s fists clenched.

“Fucking Ghoulies.” Fangs spat out. “If I wasn’t in here, I would have given them hell.” Fangs winced when he sat up a little further.

“Yeah, we all tried, there was way too many of them, but that’s not going to stop me from going for them again.” Sweet Pea looked down. “It should have been me. If I had just stayed with her like she wanted me to, it could have been me and she wouldn’t be in here, you should see her Fangs, it’s bad.” Sweet Pea wiped the tears out of his eyes, he hadn’t cried in front of Fangs in years which made Fangs eyes fall to his lap, Sweet Pea was always the strongest of the Serpents, emotionally and physically. “I’ll never understand how she got through it; I mean for fucks sake we’re talking about the (y/n) who begged for you to give her a band-aid for the cut she got when she attempted to get on your bike.” Fangs chuckled at the memory; it had hardly been a scratch.

“You don’t give her as much credit as she deserves, Pea. She’s strong, maybe not physically but emotionally. She got kicked out of her house, moved to the South Side and made friends with us, the Serpents. She cried for two minutes before she knew she could do it herself, she puts us all in our places and you know it. We’re going to get justice for her, and I'll die trying if I have to.” Fangs looked at Sweet Pea who met his eyes, nodding in agreement.

FP sat in the only chair in the small room, the sound of the small beep from (y/n)’s heartbeat being the only thing he could concentrate in. His eyes drifted into space, thinking about all the things that he could have done to prevent it. A groan snapped FP out of his thoughts, (y/n) moving her hand around the bed to find Sweet Pea’s. FP moved his hand to hers, opening her eyes she smiled at FP, the pain not being too bad for the moment. “Forsythe Pendleton.” She smiled causing FP to chuckle.

“You know you’re the only one I let call me that.” FP squeezed her hand. “How are you feeling?”

“Could be worse.” (Y/N) shrugged. “Sweet Pea?” Her head tilted to the side.

“He’s with Fangs.” FP answered.

“Fangs.” (Y/N)’s eyes widened. “How is he?” She sat up, not minding the pain that had shot through her.

“Easy now, don’t want you getting more hurt.” FP sighed. “He’s doing good, can’t wait to see you of course.” FP smiled when he saw (y/n)’s small smile. “Listen, I was thinking. Maybe you should call your mom, let her know what’s happening.” FP moved closer and (y/n)’s eyebrows creased.

“Call my mom? FP are you on drugs? The lady kicked me out, told me I would be nothing but a disappointment for dating a Serpent, I’m not calling her. You’re out of your mind if you think I am, for what? So she can tell me she told me so? I think not.” (Y/N)’s voice rose and so did her heartbeat.

“Calm down, I just thought, she’d like to know that you’re here.” (Y/N) laughed and shook her head.

“I could careless about her and what she’d want.” (Y/N) huffed. A knock at the door made both of them look at it. Jughead walking in, alone with a teddy bear in one hand. “Juggie.” (Y/N) smiled, she noticed his busted lip before his black eye.

“I didn’t know you were here, I thought I might have had to fight Sweet Pea for a second alone with her.” Jughead laughed looking at his father who stood up, looking at (y/n).

“Just think about it?” FP kissed her forehead before he left the room.

“What was that about?” Jughead walked closer to his friend, the teddy bear being placed in her hands.

“He wasn’t me to call my mom. Let her know what happened.” (Y/N) sighed looking at the teddy bear, it was light brown, with bright blue eyes which made no sense to her. “I’m not doing it so don’t try to convince me otherwise.” Her eyes met Jughead’s and he chuckled shaking his head.

“I’m not. How are you feeling?” He asked sighing when his butt hit the uncomfortable chair.

“The pain is bearable for now, until the meds die off.” The room fell silent for two minutes before (y/n) spoke up. “I told you guys not to mess with Penny.” Jughead looked at her and before he could speak she put her hand up. “No, let me talk please. I know it’s not my place to say anything about the Serpents because I’m nothing to you guys but I told you going after Penny was going to be a disaster and I’m telling you this because you’re the leader Jug, they listen to you.” She sighed and put her head down. “I’m not blaming you for what happen to me, that was all Penny, but if Sweet Pea had been there with me I wouldn’t have been able to help him alone. If they would have taken Sweet Pea everything would have been over, she talked about killing him Jughead. I don’t know about you but Sweet Pea means the world to me and I’d be dammed if you or anyone else dared to hurt him. This whole Serpents versus Ghoulies needs to stop, not only for your sake but everybody involved with you guys. Me, Cheryl, Betty, even Archie.” Jughead nodded agreeing.

“I know, it was stupid to go after her but you don’t understand the things, she has us doing, it had to stop. I should have done something differently but I didn’t. This is new to me, I’m still learning and I know that’s no excuse but those guys are counting on me just as much as you are and I’m so sorry I let you down, Fangs too, but I’ll do whatever I have to do for this not to happen again.” Jughead sighed and (y/n) smiled at him.

“You’re not a bad leader Jughead, you just make terrible decisions, like the time you thought It was the best idea to go to the lake when we were specifically told not to and we ended up getting attacked by leeches.” Jughead laughed shaking his head, remembering the memory. Sweet Pea entered the room before knocking, something he’d done out of habit. “Sweets.” (Y/N)’s eyes lit up, Jughead standing from the chair. Sweet Pea smiled as he saw his girlfriend extend her hand towards him, perking her lips to get a kiss from the Serpent. He kissed her lips for the first time in hours, he could feel her swollen lips and she could feel the cut that occupied his bottom lip. Jughead cleared his throat, standing from the chair. “I meant what I said Jug.” He nodded before leaving the room, Sweet Pea telling her what Fangs wanted her to know.

—

It had been two weeks since the riot and both Fangs and (Y/N) were back in Riverdale High. The two turned heads the first three days they were back. Fangs in crutches while (y/n) did her best to hide her face, Sweet Pea’s large body making it easier for her. The Ghoulies had gone to hiding finding it almost impossible for the Serpents to find them. (Y/N) was thankful for Sweet Pea, he had helped her the past weeks and even though (y/n) didn’t know, his eyes stayed open all night. He hadn’t had a good night sleep in days and it was starting to show. “So, I was thinking, I think it’s time for me to go back to Toni’s.” (Y/N)’s voice cut through Sweet Pea’s ears; his eyes closed before he looked at her. He had been dosing off in the middle of lunch.

“What? Why?” Sweet Pea’s breathing had hitched and she caught it before he could hide it. She placed her hand on his cheek, looking at Fangs who nodded before she looked back at her boyfriend.

“I’ll be okay Pea.” His eyes looked in hers, complete sadness in them. “I’m going to be okay; I know you haven’t been sleeping.” He opened his mouth to talk but she stopped him. "Don’t deny it, Fangs told me. He saw you, night after night. I’m not going to be the reason you’re losing sleep Sweet Pea. Plus, I miss spending time with Toni, I haven’t really been able to hang out with her since the riot.” Sweet Pea looked at Fangs before looking at Toni.

“You don’t like spending time with me?” Sweet Pea’s eyes met hers once more.

“Of course, I do Sweet Pea. But you not sleeping isn’t going to help anyone.” Sweet Pea nodded before he rested his head on her shoulder. “I’m going to be okay; you know Toni won’t let anyone inside the house past seven.” (Y/N) giggled running her hand through Sweet Pea’s hair.

“Get a room.” Fangs threw a paper at the couple before Sweet Pea raised his middle finger towards the boy causing him to laugh.

“Guys.” Jughead’s loud voice called before he ran towards the table. Sweet Pea’s head snapping towards Jughead.

“Jughead, calm down, what’s up?” (Y/N) stood up before she looked at Archie who ran towards Jughead, his hand coming to grab Veronica’s arm.

“We have to get out of here.” Archie spoke loudly looking at Sweet Pea who had already gotten up and wrapped his arm around (y/n)’s shoulder.

“Why, what’s going on?” Betty spoke as Jughead desperately tried to get her to stand. The sounds of people pounding on the lockers had everyone looking towards it.

“What is that?” Sweet Pea looked at Jughead, his eyes snapping to (y/n).

“Ghoulies.” Jughead spoke before the fire alarm started to ring, kids scrambling to get out of the cafeteria, Ghoulies refilling it, (Y/N) looked at Sweet Pea before looking at the Ghoulies, memories flooding her vision. They were clearly outnumbered and soon, they’d understand why.

____

story tags; @t-a-i-l-o-r-m-a-d-e @reblogserpent @sgarrett49

#sweet pea imagines #sweet pea #sweet pea x reader #sweet pea fanfiction #riverdale #riverdale fanfic #riverdale masterlist #jughead jones #archie andrews #betty cooper #veronica lodge #cheryl blossom #toni topaz #reggie mantle #fp jones #kevin keller #fangs fogarty

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heyyyharry · 6 years

Note

please a part3 to that wonderful story of friend Harry!! It is so great. Of course I don't want to be annoying and I know that it's frustrating when people keep asking for more so yeah. it's alright if you don't wanna write another piece, but you have to know that I think it's amazing. :)

Part 1 Part 2 “can you write one where Y/N has a crush on Harry but he’s dating Camille and then when she gives up on loving him he realizes it but it’s too late?”

So THIS is PART 3 :D I’m sorry it took this long. Aaaaand you are not annoying AT ALL. I love it when people keep asking for more, it really boosts my confidence! I apologize I couldn’t answer everyone’s messages telling me to write part 3, but just know that I’ve read all of them and I’m so gad you guys enjoyed my works. So this is the last part I guess. I hope I don’t disappoint ya’ll.

Harry invited me to his end-of-tour party. I was torn between going and not going, but it was probably a very important event to Harry, what kind of friend would I be if I refused to show up? So I asked Joey to come with me. It was surprising to find out Harry hadn’t invited Joey, maybe he’d got so many guests, Joey’s name must have slipped off his mind. I convinced Joey to accompany me anyway, he was Harry’s friend too.

The party was thrown at Jeff’s new house. The moment we arrived, I silently thanked God that I’d asked Joey to come with me since I couldn’t recognize a single face in the crowd. Harry was nowhere to be seen either.

“Are you sure we’re at the right party?” Joey asked me and I laughed. Fortunately, Jeff found us.

“Joey, my man! And Y/N, right?” he asked, smiling at me as he shook my hand a bit too enthusiastically. I was surprised he even remembered who I was, since we met only once at Harry’s first solo concert.

“Sick party, mate,” Joey said, making Jeff chuckle.

“Our superstar deserves all of this.”

“Speaking of our superstar, have you seen H?” I asked. Jeff looked behind him and then turned back to me.

“I just saw him sitting by the pool. Maybe he’s still there.”

“Okay. We’re gonna go say hi to Harry.”

“Wait!” Jeff stopped me when I was about to drag Joey with me. “Can I borrow this man for a second?”

“Ugh…” Joey looked at me as if to ask for permission. I knew he didn’t want to leave me alone with Harry. Well, actually, I had specifically asked him not to do so. But I felt like I’d be fine. I hadn’t thought of Harry for weeks, I probably had gotten over him now.

“It’s okay. He’s all yours.” I smiled, releasing Joey’s wrist. He slightly kissed me on the cheek and told me he’d be out there with me in a moment.

“Nice talking to you, Y/N!” Jeff said to me then he threw an arm around Joey’s neck, pulling my friend with him.

I watched until the two of them had disappeared behind a group of people. Then I made my way to the swimming pool backyard. I saw a couple of people drinking by the pool and was quick to spot Harry sitting on the edge, pretty far from everyone else, alone, his feet dangling in the crystal blue water. It was the first time I’d seen him at a party without a bottle in his hand.

I marched towards him and tapped him slightly on the shoulder. Harry’s head immediately shot up and he put on the biggest smile when he saw it was me.

“Hey,” I said, smiling back. And to my surprise, he was up on his feet, arms wrapped around my body, pulling me into a tight hug.

“Someone’s happy to see me,” I joked, finally wrapping my arms around his broad shoulders. I could feel him smiling against my neck.

“I thought you wouldn’t come,” he mumbled into my skin. I felt my heart flutter at the words.

“How could I not?” I giggled and he pulled away a bit to look at me, but his hands remained on my lower back.

“You missed my final show.”

“I was busy,” I lied. I was sitting at home reading updates about his last show on social media.

“Do you-uh…wanna sit?”

“Sure.” I nodded then joined him on the edge of the fool, with our feet in the water.

“Shouldn’t you be inside where most of your guests are?” I asked.

“Nah. The music is too loud.”

I scoffed and pushed his shoulder playfully. “What happened to the guy who told me to try and have some fun at parties?”

“I am having fun.” Harry chuckled. His dimples were showing again. And suddenly I forgot about everything had happened, about all the weeks I’d spent trying to get him off my mind. All of that was flushed away the moment he smiled at me. I knew it was wrong to even be thinking about him in such a way, but he had me in the palms of his hands so easily.

“So any news with you? I haven’t seen you in so long.”

“Hmm.” I hummed while looking up, thinking, but I felt his eyes never leaving my face. “Oh right. I finally left my old boring job and got the new job I wanted, for the marketing agency I told you about. I just received their email last week.”

“Oh, that’s great! Congratulations!” Harry exclaimed as if it was him who’d just got hired, which really got me elated.

“So when do you start?”

“Next month.” I heaved a sigh. “I’m happy but nervous at the same time, you know what i mean?”

“Well, I’m excited for you. There’s nothing to be worried about. I know you’ll do well,” he told me, giving me a thumb up and a silly grin, which got me to crack up.

“Okay, enough about me. how about you? Any news?”

His beam gradually faded away as he turned his eyes to watch his feet in the water. “Camille and I…we broke up.”

“Oh.” I was stiff, didn’t really expect that.

I’d imagined this situation where he told me it was over with his girlfriend, and I’d thought I’d be overjoyed, which was the complete opposite of how I was feeling now when it had happened for real.

“I’m so sorry, H. Are you okay?” I questioned, resting a hand on his arm.

“I’m fine. It happened two weeks ago. It’s…Let’s just put in behind us.”

“Okay.” I nodded once and was about to withdraw my hand when he suddenly took it and brought it to his lap, holding it with his both hands. I looked at him and he looked at me, neither said a single word, and it was the longest five seconds of my life, I swear.

“There you are!”

Harry and I jumped when we heard the voice. I abruptly pulled my hand away and turned to the person.

“Sorry it took me so long. Hey Harry,” said Joey as he walked towards us and gave me a hand to pull me back on my feet. Harry also stood up and I noticed the look on his face, it was almost like he was displeased to see Joey.

“Congratulations on the successful tour, mate!” Joey patted Harry on the back, but Harry looked restrained as he said his thank.

“Y/N, come on, I’ll show you something,” Joey told me with his fingers locked around my wrist to pull me with him. However, Harry wasn’t just going to let him snatch me away just like that.

“Didn’t you see we were having a conversation?”

“Harry.” I stood between the two men but neither of them backed down.

“I know this is your party but she’s allowed to talk to other people too,” Joey squinted his eyes at Harry. I yanked his arm to remind him to keep his calm. Joey looked at me then shook his head slightly, mimicking what I’d just done. He could get a bit too overly protective sometimes.

“I’m sure Y/N can make up her own mind.”

Suddenly Harry put his hand on my waist, slightly pulling me back towards him. I was shocked and confused at the same time but I just really didn’t want these two to start a fight because of me. I pressed my lips together and looked up at Joey.

“Just give us a second. I’ll be right in there with you.”

Joey gave me the look of disappointment, but knowing me too well, there was nothing he could have done then. So he left us anyway, telling me he’d be waiting for me in the living room. I was breaking every one of my rules tonight, just for Harry, but was I going to regret it? Probably not.

“What was that all about?” I spun around to face Harry.

“He was rude first,” he said and sat back down on the edge of the pool. I rolled my eyes and rejoined him.

“Yeah but it wasn’t necessary to be rude back.”

“Why are you defending him?”

“I’m not. I just don’t want my two friends to fight.”

Harry didn’t say anything else, just staring at me.

“What? Is there something on my face?” I asked worriedly.

Harry still didn’t say a word. His eyes slowly shifted to my lips. And the next thing that happened, fucking blew my mind. I heard him mumble “Fuck it” then he just went forward, grabbed my face, and kissed me!

I was literally frozen for a few seconds to process what was really going on. Then I just couldn’t help but go with the flow, I kissed him back. My mind was just blank. Many times, I’d imagined how his lips would taste like, how they would feel like, and reality was just beyond my imagination. If I could, I would kiss him forever.

We pulled away to catch our breaths but our lips stayed close to each other. His right hand moved down to rest on my hip as I felt the pressure of his palm as if he was afraid that I’d just disappear if he let me go.

“This can’t be happening,” I whispered with my eyes closed. Harry caressed my cheek then combed his fingers through my hair only so he could kiss me again, the kiss was slower and softer this time. I had to hold back a moan as he tasted and smelt so good.

We were sitting pretty distant from the few people on the other side of the pool who were too occupied with their own conversation to actually care about us. But to be honest, even if we were in a room packed with people, I would still let him kiss me like that.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this,” he groaned into my mouth.

“How long?” I asked.

“Too long” was his reply. I wondered what he really meant by that. He’d been with his girlfriend the whole time.

“I figured something was off when I was so bothered by seeing you leave my birthday party with Joe. I couldn’t sleep that night thinking about you. It just never crossed my mind before, the thought that you might belong to someone else. Then when I watched you leave in the middle of my concert, with him, I realized…I wasn’t fine at all.” He took my silence as a sign to continue. “Things between Camille and I hadn’t been so great for a long time. It had nothing to do with you. But I couldn’t stay with her knowing…I was in love with you.”

I was shocked by those last words. “You were…in love with me?”

“I am.” He smirked. “I’ve been sad for weeks. I wanted to call you but I didn’t know where to start. Then Mitch suggested me to throw this party and maybe you’d come.”

“Wow, you threw a party just to see me? What’s wrong with you rich people?” I giggled and ran my thumb across his cheek. It was still unbelievable now that I could just touch him like I’d always wanted.

“That sounded stupid, but now you’re here, aren’t you?” He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips.

“How did you eventually find out that nothing was going on between Joey and I?”

“I drunk called Mitch one night, and while I was rambling about how I’d lost you to Joe, he told me it was really me that you had a crush on, not him.”

I quickly covered my face with my other hand. “Oh God no Mitch.”

“I thought it was cute. I’m sorry I didn’t realize. Or maybe it was just easier thinking you only liked me as a friend so that I wouldn’t cross the line.”

“Then why did you still give Joey the attitude? You knew we were just friends.”

“He tried to steal you away.”

I snorted. “I’m still here, aren’t I?”

“You are,” said Harry with the widest smile on his lips. All of a sudden, he stood up. “Would you like to skip the party and go for a drive with me?

“This is your party!” I gasped.

“I’m pretty sure everyone’s too drunk to remember this is my party. I’ve been out here for pretty long and nobody bothered to come find me.”

“Well then.” I shrugged and took Harry’s hand as he helped pull me up. It was then that I remembered something very important.

“Wait, H,” I grabbed onto his sleeve as he turned away. “There’s something else.”

“What is it petal?” Harry looked at me. His green eyes were opened wide. I almost forgot what I was about to say when he called me that. The nickname got me beaming like an idiot for a second.

“I just remembered I haven’t properly told you this…I-I’m in love with you too…”

Harry appeared to be much more at ease once he heard me saying those words. Without warning, he pulled me into his chest and laid a soft kiss on the top of my head. I happily hugged his torso, drowning in his scent.

“I’m all yours now, love,” he breathed into my hair. “And you’re mine.”

#harry styles #harry edward styles #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles series #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shots #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfics #harry styles writing #bestfriend!harry #solo harry styles #answered #requests

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everlark-your-own-adventure · 6 years

Text

Powder Keg - Ch 5

Welcome back to the adventure we’re all everlarking together! Fallen behind in the story? Here are the previous chapters: Chapter 1 /// Chapter 2 /// Chapter 3 /// Chapter 4

In last week’s installment of Powder Keg, Katniss and Peeta were forced to work together to tame a bunch of bratty fourth graders. But of course, all did not go according to plan, and now they find themselves at the top of the mountain with an injured (and very ticked off) Katniss and a storm blowing in. You, everlarkers, voted for our dynamic duo to take refuge in a nearby cave. What happens next? Hold on tight, kids, because the next gripping chapter was penned by the always amazing @appleblossomgirl0305 and it’s a doozy.

As always, you have 48 hours to vote, until noon, Wednesday, December (how is it December already??) the 6th. Remember, vote in the comments or reblogs, not in the tags! And as always, share with your friends, more voices = more fun! Ready? Here we go… grab your favourite warm beverage and settle in for our weekly trip to Mt. Mockingjay...

The walk to Old Hans cave is the longest hundred yards of my life.

Peeta, no doubt relishing seeing me defenseless and utterly pathetic, immediately slings an arm around my waist. I’m surprised to see the hurt in his eyes as I push him away. I wish his misery brought me pleasure or at least the satisfaction that he deserves all of the pain I can inflict, but instead the sadness clouding those sky-blue eyes makes my heart ache. But I turn away, refusing to waste any energy on his feelings, he certainly didn’t care about mine, that night three years ago, or really anytime since.

I try to hop, leaning on my ski pole for support, but once we’ve left the groomed part of the hill, the snow is too soft to facilitate jumping. I switch to a modified lurch-leg drag, but even the small transfer of weight makes my knee scream. I’m seriously contemplating crawling when Peeta's arm wraps around me, his large hand grasping my hip firmly lest I try to shake him off. Before I can protest again, Peeta barks out, "Shit, Katniss, just pretend I'm a crutch. At the rate you're going we'll freeze to death before we get to the cave.”

As much as I desperately want to spit back that he’s welcome to go on ahead if he can’t handle a little snow storm, the wind is starting to kick up and the icy snow is coming down at a hard angle and I know he’s right. My perspiration has started to cool and I can feel the cold, damp hair freezing against the back of my neck.

With my curt nod, he half drags, half carries me to the mouth of the cave. The last few yards to the cave opening are rocky. Peeta drops the skis, hoists me up into his arms bridal-style and carries me into the shelter. I feel my face flush and I’ve never been so happy to be wearing a ski mask. Despite my embarrassment, it feels amazing to have my weight off my throbbing knee, and if I’m being honest, it also feels oddly thrilling to be held so close to him, to feel the warmth of his neck on the skin of my wrist where my arm is slung over around his shoulder. I’ve fought long and hard to keep my feelings for Peeta confined to a narrow spectrum that runs from hatred to indifference with healthy stops along the way at annoyance, resentment and dislike. Maybe the pain has worn me down, weakened my resolve, but for just a moment, I fantasize about surrendering to his comfort, pulling up my ski mask and nestling my face into that place between his neck and shoulder where I know from experience he smells like heaven.

He sets me down with such exaggerated gentleness, I almost laugh, but the pain as I put my foot down makes me wince. His answering grimace as he pulls up his mask almost looks like sympathy.

Disappearing back into the snow, he returns a few minutes later with our skis and tells me he radioed Jo to let her know we’d made it to the cave and would need medical evacuation when the storm allowed.

I know I should thank him, but I can’t bring myself to say it. Instead, I nod in acknowledgement and stare out at the snow, falling thick and wet. When he sits a couple of feet from me, he shoots me a sheepish look, then asks, “How’s your knee feeling?”

“It hurts,” I say curtly. “You know how sprains are.” I trail off, remembering a time from before when he had twisted his ankle. The pain of remembering what it felt like to be close to him, to have shared my life with him, twists in my gut, making it difficult to believe I’m looking at the same person. “Look, maybe it’s better if we just don’t talk, alright?”

“Right, I’m a dick even when I’m trying to be nice.” He shakes his head ruefully. "Fine, I'll just wait over here. You can go on acting like I don't exist."

"Classic," I snort softly under my breath.

I want to just sit here and ignore him, I really do. But there's this look he gets when he stops smiling, when he stops being “on”, this hollow, lonely look like all of his dimpled-smile, golden-tongued, easy confidence isn't enough. He's got it now as he stares out at the swirling snow and I feel that need that only he's ever made me feel. That need to comfort him, consume him, to crack myself open and offer him everything I have. And it pisses me off. So when he glances back over at me, all wounded-looking, I snap.

"How dare you look at me like that?"

"Like what?! Please, Katniss, tell me what I'm doing wrong now.” Though I’m pretty sure he means it sarcastically, there’s so much raw pain in his voice, I can’t be sure.

"Like that," I gesture wildly at his face. “Like you're the one who has a right to be pissed."

"I'm not pissed. I just don't understand what happened. Why you hate me."

I physically recoil, he’s got to be screwing with me. Fuck him. He knows what he did. I'm not falling for his baffled innocence routine. I was vulnerable for him once and he stomped on my heart. Never again. It costs too much for me to show him that particular scar. "You can't be serious. Though I have no doubt that you're a self-delusional ass, you can't be that clueless."

His color’s high, his blue eyes flashing dangerously as he turns to face me fully. "Look, you can rewrite history however you want to, but you kissed me." He holds up a hand to stop me from speaking, but I'm so indignantly furious that I haven't come up with any words yet. "I'm not saying I didn't want to kiss you. I’d wanted to kiss you forever. Being with you-- I hadn't been able to think straight for weeks. But I was too afraid to screw up something so important, so I'd chickened out. Repeatedly."

I’m so caught off guard by his honesty, I snap my mouth closed. I’ve tried to forget the palpable energy between us on those nights we'd sat in my driveway, cocooned in each other's company. I'd never felt so alive without a pair of skis strapped to my feet. I can feel the heat rise in my body as I remember the exquisite excitement of being so close to someone to someone that I was crazy about, desperate for, made breathless by, of us building towards something as unbelievable (or impossible) as love. My chest actually aches as I recall his arm around Bristel, the dismissive little wave he'd given me.

"I'm surprised you remember anything since it obviously meant so little to you."

He rubs his face hard, leaving his cheeks even rosier, his curls sticking up from his forehead. "What are you even talking about, Katniss? That kiss meant everything to me. I told you that a million times! You blew me off!"

"What? How?" I demanded, "How exactly did you tell me that? By cuddling up with Bristel less than twenty-four hours later? By barely acknowledging me? By acting like an indifferent prick for the past three years?" I’m breathing hard, my hands balled into fists wanting desperately to hurt him as much as he'd hurt me. But fists can’t inflict that kind of pain.

"Cuddling with-? Are you serious? She was telling me about her brother's leukemia diagnosis. What was I gonna to do, ask her to hold that thought while I said hello my new maybe girlfriend?"

Wait a minute, that sounds strangely plausible. Bristel had left the lodge soon after that party due to some sort of family emergency.

"I had been dying to see you all day. You walk in, stunning in that crimson sweater and I had to work my ass off to stay focused on what Bristel was saying. And then you were gone. You and Hawthorne." He shoots me a glance brimming with accusation.

"Don't be stupid, Gale just needed a ride home. It was you that..." My voice trails off. Is it possible that he hadn’t blown me off exactly like I thought?

"I texted you like fifty times that night. I called, I emailed, I even wrote you a goddamned letter. You wouldn't talk to me."

Crap, that sounds just about right too. "Well, I blocked your number. Deleted your emails. I never got the letter. What was I supposed to do? I didn’t want to hear your excuses. I trusted you and you hurt me!" I shout.

"Well, then I guess we're even." His expression twists into something between a smirk and a grimace.

But this can’t all just be a mistake, can it? I've spent three years nurturing this grudge. I've watched Peeta flirt relentlessly with all of the women that swoon over his golden beauty. Besides, it doesn't really matter, we actually hate each other now.

“You could have talked to me if you really wanted,” I say, my mind still reeling with all this information that contradicts my carefully tended grudge. “Besides, how do you explain that you flirt with anything in a tight sweater?” I sound petulant, but I don’t care.

“First off, Hawthorne told me, in no uncertain terms, to leave you the hell alone. Second, just because you broke my heart, I’m supposed to live like a monk for the rest of my life? You broke my heart, not my dick.” He shakes his head like he’s trying to clear it. “You make it sound like I’m some kind of player, which is completely unfair. I’ve dated, but I haven’t had a girlfriend since-,” he looks away and clears his throat before continuing in a quieter voice. “The way things ended between us messed me up. I’ve been chasing the feeling of being with you since that night. Nothing’s ever come close.” I can’t help staring at him in shock. “What?" he demands. The bitterness hangs in the frigid air between us, nearly visible as the white puffs of our breath. His confession is already sapping the heat from my anger.

"N-n-nothing," I stammer through my violent shivering. Without my indignant fury, it feels like my body heat is being sucked into the rock beneath me. I want to pull my knees up to my chin and zip them inside my jacket, but my injured knee won't bend like that. But I'm so cold that my muscles are starting to lock up, making everything hurt.

"Jesus, Katniss, your lips are turning blue. This is ridiculous." He looks angry, but I know it's frustration at my intractability. I've seen that look on every friend and family member's face at some point. “You can hate me all you want, but we need to warm you up.”

I can't help but wonder how many people have taken refuge in this cave over the millennia. I imagine my ancestors staring out of this very cave opening, wreathed with icicles, grateful for the shelter and refuge from the elements. How many of them would have turned down an opportunity for warmth, for survival out of spite? My refusal of Peeta's offer of body heat suddenly seems ridiculous, reckless even.

"Fine," I say through chattering teeth, unable to look directly at him. "You're right."

Without a moment of hesitation, he walks over to where I sit shivering. He says softly, "Good to know you have a bit of sense under all that stubbornness." He stands there for a moment and as I glance up, readying myself for an argument, the "do you need a written invitation?" quip already on the tip of my tongue, he surprises me by taking off his jacket. Then, as I stare in open-mouthed confusion, he strips off his fleece liner jacket, until he stands before me in a silk thermal so thin I can see the outline of each muscle and both peaked nipples. I swallow hard, noticing that he’s more defined than I remember. Too soon, he’s zipping his ski jacket back up.

Laying the fleece down next to me on the rock slab, he sits down on it and gently, but without hesitation, he pulls me into his lap. The relief is incredible as I stop hemorrhaging heat, but I still can't stop the shuddering. He sighs dramatically behind me and nudges me forward while he unzips his jacket before pulling me back against his chest. I can feel the warmth against the back of my neck and I want more. I take a deep breath and steel myself before quickly unzipping my jacket and whipping it off. The icy air is like knives through the holes in my wool sweater, until I push myself back flush against him and zip his jacket around both of us. The warmth is immediate, spreading along my limbs like melted butter. It’s like slipping into a sweater warm from the dryer. I groan in pleasure and Peeta breathes in a sharply through his nose. I turn to look up at him, sure I've hurt him, but it isn't pain I see in his eyes when ours meet. He looks predatory, pupils blown as he licks his lips. My body responds instinctively, pushing back against him as he wraps both arms around me.

"It's like climbing inside an oven," I murmur, needing to diffuse the tension. We're pressed so tightly together, I feel his responding chuckle vibrate through my chest, then ricochet through my entire body. And while it doesn't really change anything, I feel some of the hardness around my heart soften a bit.

I spread my jacket over our legs and we just sit breathing together for a while, staring out at the steadily falling snow, until Jo’s crackly voice comes over the radio to tell us that rescue is on the way.

His voice is scarcely louder than a whisper and spoken so close to my ear that I feel the warmth of his breath and shiver for reasons other than the cold. “Katniss, do you think we could just start over? If I stopped being so, you know, wounded, we could take a shot at just being friends?” he says.

Before I find my voice to give an answer, we hear the the crunch of snow and the sound of voices from just outside the cave. Our evac is here. Realizing that I’m sitting on Peeta’s lap, I panic. I need to get out of this position before our friends and coworkers see us all cuddled up together. Then again, Jo does want us to get along better, to work as a team. Should I extricate myself and face our colleagues on my own two feet or risk the embarrassment of being found snuggling with my arch nemesis, knowing word will get back to Jo?

#EYOA #powder keg #things are heating up on the mountain!#what should Katniss do now?#YOU get to decide!#So vote!#vote vote vote!#But not in the tags #the tags are for snark and smut requests :P

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torinspeer-blog · 7 years

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GET TO KNOW ME

1. What’s your first name? Torin 2. What are you listening to right now?  The ambient noises of my property. OH! SHIT! Uhhh... punk rock Spotify playlist-punk pop's not dead 3. What was the last thing you ate? Tuna fish sandwich 4. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?  "Attention: important seniors!" Medicare 5. Do you drink?  🤤🤤🤤 6. Do you smoke?  Only to give myself cancer!👍👏👏🙌💯 7. What is the first thing you noticed in someone?  I think it depends on the individual? I mean I'm an intuition dom and have ADHD so it's not like I notice🤷‍♀️ 8. What is your hair color?  Very dark brown 9. What is your eye color? Hazel 10. Do you wear contacts/glasses?  Reading glasses 11. Dogs or cats?  dogs no shit you ever seen a kitters run around like a little glob weeaboo? Uhuh I didn't think so hun! 12. What’s your favorite animal?  ANY ANIMAL THAT CUDDLES ME AND MAKES ME FEEL LESS ALONE!!!!! 13. What’s your favorite television show?  Parks and rec probably (seen the ending? On the emotional level it's more like parks and rekt am I fucking right guys? YEET!) 14. What’s your favorite movie?  Farris buellers day off what am I a hipster? 15. What’s your favorite band/singer?  GREENDAYGREENDAYGREENDAYGREENDAYENFP4W5PIXIEPRIDESON!!!! 16. How old are you?  19. I'm old enough to know a thing or two. Like, literally. I know one thing and maybe another but no more than that. 17. Do you have a crush on anyone? yes... don't worry. I burry my feelings deep inside my soul just like every other well adjusted adult 18. What’s your sexual orientation?  I thought I was bi but then a bi guy said hi from behind and that thought ended 19. What’s your favorite color? blue? Red? Purple? I'm more of a... ummm... shit 20. What was your most embarrassing moment?  😂😂😂 ok, so there was this one time, I was born, and it got soooooyyyt awkward!!😂😂😳 21. Do you ever wish you were someone else?  Oh god I have enough extisensial dread as is holy shit take that to someone else 22. What were you like when you were a kid?  Lazy, stupid, and never gonna accomplish anything with a work ethic like that hahahaHAHAHAHA SOMEBODY TAKE THE PAIN AWAY 23. What would your dream house be like?  A little house in the prairies where I can sit in the front yard with my wife in a rocking chair and watch my grandchildren play 24. What last made you laugh?  My last joke, bitch 25. What is your favorite word?  Romp... hehehe. It makes me think of cute little bunny rabbits hopping along in the woods 26. What is your least favorite word?  No 27. What turns you on? IF YOU LET ME TALK FOR A WHILE AND GIGGLE AND THINK IM SMART I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER 28. What turns you off?  ME NOT BEING ONE OF YOUR FAVORITE PEOPLE (holy shit I mean these are jokes but like god do I need therapy? Holy shit). 29. What is your star sign?  Sometimes, when I'm lost, I like to look for a sign to know whether I'm standing in the light of the word, or its darkness (the joke is that I use the sun as a sign for if it's daytime hartyharhar). 30. What are your favorite books?   31. Do you have any siblings?  two brothers and two sisters 32. Do you like to dance? Depends if you count air guitar and awkward lanky jolting as dancing cuz if yes THEN YA IM THE FUCKING MLG TRICK SHOT KING OF THAT SHIT. 33. What is your definition of cheating?  Summoning help in dark souls 34. Have you ever cheated on someone?  Nope 35. Do you regret anything?  Who the hell doesn't? Regret is a natural and essential piece of the human condition. It's horrible, but it teaches us how to live. 36. Do you have any phobias? Tight spaces high spaces suffocating in spaces (pluralized by virtue of multiverse theory) standing in line waiting to talk getting cut off cutting someone off cutting myself my memes not being fresh enough you know normal people stuff 37. Ever broken any bones? Sadly, no😔 38. Ever come close to death?  I mean I almost killed myself several time soooo... (guys before you ask I'm ok now don't worry I'm just figuring my shit out😂😂) 39. What is your religion, if any?  I worship at the holy grail of Cthulhu ahem check your privilege 40. Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist?  Yes. I had a crush on her. Refer to question #27 41. Are looks important in a relationship?  They aren't the most important thing but yes I like being sexually attracted to people I'll potentially fuck exclusively for the rest of my life 42. Are you more like your mom or your dad?  I refuse to identify commonalities 43. What is your favorite season?  Springs, or fall. I don't pay attention but I live in Arizona so whatever time my balls aren't stuck to my pants🤗 44. Do you have any tattoos?  No but if I did it would just be "[]" because it's basically "[insert here]" brackets so I could tell people it's for or means or is about anything I want to. 45. Do you have any piercings?  No. But I have pierced myself IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN😂😂🙌💯 46. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?  1? One lasted four days does that count? Cuz then it's 2. God... I need to get laid. OR HAVE AN ADORABLE HUNAM TO CUDDLE AND TALK TO AND DO THE DIRTY WITH AS THE CHERRY ON TOP OF HER CHERRY😂😂😂 oh god I kill myself😂 47. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? As MBTI lore would suggest (I'm an enfp btw howdy), my soul belongs to sexy anime babes. 48. Who is your celebrity crush? ... that just made me feel lonely and I don't know why 49. Are you a virgin? 😉 50. Do you get jealous easily? Depends on the situation. I always keep it under wraps though. 51. What is your favorite type of food?  BUFFALO WINGS!!!! THOSE BETTER EXIST IN THE HEAVEN I DONT BELIEVE IN 52. Do you ever want to get married?  Hell ya my dude! 53. Who was your first kiss with?  My first girlfriend. 54. Have you ever been cheated on?  ... 55. What is your idea of the perfect date?  No idea. Just as long as we connect really well and I have the sense of finding someone who actually makes sense as a person and does that in a way complimentary to who I am. Talk about life I guess. NO HOLY SHIT TALK ABOUT LIFE FUCK YES!!!! 56. Are you an introvert or an extrovert?  Introverted extrovert😉😉😉 57. Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets?  I doubt it but I believe in a neighboring universe where Hitler doesn't have a mustache soooo.... 58. What talent do you wish you’d been born with?  Self esteem 59. What is your saddest memory?  Hahahaha... no 60. Do you believe in love at first sight?  no but I do believe in getting your jimmies rustled on first sight😉 61. Do you believe in soul mates?  I'm a nihilist. I believe in finding someone who fits you well enough that the tear in your soul is mostly ignorable, but not anyone who's made for you 62. Have you ever dyed your hair?  No 63. Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you?  So one of the definitions for my name in urban dictionary is "Torin: likes to masturbate with the slimy sea creatures of the sea to get that real pussy feel. Synonymous with 'squids'."... apparently that escalated from fiction to fact very quickly. 64. Would you go against your moral code for money?  It depends. Ends justify the means. For example: I would stomp several puppies to death in an absolutely brutal fashion in order to save the lives of millions of children starving to death in Africa. 65. What are three things most people don’t know about you?  I've struggled with depression since 8th grade. I'm fairly certain their are missing pieces of my personality, which would explain why there's a different version of me for every person and why I forget who I am after just like 2 days of being alone. I don't cry a lot but it's not for healthy reasons. 66. Who are you jealous of? Basically everyone 67. Do you sleep with a stuffed toy?  NO BUT NOW I WANT TO I JUST GOT ALL WARM AND FUZZY FEELING 68. How long was your longest relationship?  About six months 69. Is the glass half empty or half full?  It's in the eye of the beholder. It doesn't really matter which one it is though, it only matters what you do with what's left. 70. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?  😳 I'll wait to tell you until the third date😉 71. Who are your closest friends? Currently a college friend who's out of state. I tend not to stay particularly close to people for too long tho... ok well shit now I'm sad 72. Are you in a relationship?  Nope 73. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?  I don't even have a joke wow fuck I'm lonely 74. Are you a bad person?  STOP MAKING ME THINK ABOUT THIS SHIT IF I DO AND I DECIDE IM NOT I WILL SLIP INTO A SEVERE DEPRESSION that sounded funny in my head holy shit no it was not 75. Are you a lover or a fighter?  I fight for love💁 76. What did you do on your last birthday?  Some stuff my mother wouldn't be proud of 77. What is your favorite quote and why?  “Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I've done it a thousand times." -Mark Twain. It illustrates some things I'm not in the mindset to process 78. If your best friend died, what would you do?  NUUUUUUUUUU FUCKIN STAAAAHHHHHPPP I WILL CRY 5EVR 79. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?  Beat my bitch ass (holy shit I need to process stuff stop asking me these questions I thought I had a healthy-ish self esteem but clearly not #sendhalp) 80. If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do?  I have ADHD, so probably process everything at once and feel to panicked to do anything. That or the stimulation would be enough that I'd do everything and anything I wanted with no inhibitions. 81. What is the strangest dream you’ve ever had?  One time I sucked on this hot chicks nipples and not only did it taste nasty but the nipple grew and stabbed my fucking throat OMG I DEEPTHROATED A NIPPLE THAT JUST CLICKED WTF 82. Are you happier single or in a relationship?  In a relationship, if it's with the right person. 83. Who were you in a past life?  Mark Twain Bitch! 84. What is your happiest childhood memory?  I have no idea. None of them exist in a vacuum. They only matter in context of everything else. 85. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?  The majority of my life since my first boner yes. 86. Have you ever had an imaginary friend?  Oh I had like fucking 10 but they were all tv show characters except for one and I didn't like him that much. 87. If you were the president, what would you do?  I would gather as much information as possible about the most important matters and work down from there. 88. What is your ideal career?  Rn, comedian 89. What is your political affiliation? INDEPENDENT BITCH! 90. Are you conservative or liberal?  I'm left leaning. I identify more with liberal values but both are important in order to balance eachother out (that's why our political atmosphere is so volatile. Used to be we'd have a democrat then a republican and they'd switch every year, but congress would have the opposite orientation as the president. Now we have a switching one party system every year.) 91. Is the male or female body closest to perfection?  FUCKING WOMEN ARE YOU KIDDING ME WOMEN ARE HOURGLASSES MEN ARE LIKE UPSIDE DOWN TRIANGLES WITH LEGS AND A LITTLE DONGLE HOW IS THIS A QUESTION??!?!! 92. Do you like kissing in public?  No. I'm constantly aware of everything going on around me so I need some privacy. 93. If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change?  humans can choose super powers (I'm keeping this one from the last guy's answers fucking savage dude) 94. Where would you like to live?  NEW YORK CITY 95. Where would you go on your dream vacation?  NEW YORK CITY EXCEPT I STAY THERE 96. Describe yourself in one word.  eclectic 97. Describe yourself in one sentence.  LISTEN TO GREENDAY "walking contradiction" AND ANY SIMILAR SONG!!

#enfp #mbti #meyers briggs #4w5

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lifestoriestobetold · 7 years

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From the second I saw him, it seemed so obvious how this night would end. Still, I tried my best refusing this thought, not letting that glimpse of an idea overtake my mind. ‘He has a girlfriend now,’ I repeated over and over in my head. Even though I had – back then, unknowingly – hooked up with taken guys before, I didn’t count myself as ‘that kind of girl’. I was very happy to see him after such a long time. All of that anger that had built up before summer was gone, everything was forgotten. I didn’t even recall why I’d been so mad at him, only vaguely remembered being upset and hurt because of him. Apparently, he’d been confused about me ignoring him as he’d asked quite a lot of my close friends about what was going on with me. We’d been in a good place before that – almost too good, two friends being lovers from time to time whenever we’d get bored. He tried giving me one of these hugs he’d give me every time we saw each other – his strong arms wrapped around my body, always holding on for a second too long to be a hug just between friends – but I teasingly pushed him away at his attempt. ‘You smell like weed,’ I laughed and looked straight into his eyes, ‘have you smoked some?’ People were leaving, but we – him, my best friend and some people I knew from school – were sitting in a circle on the rooftop of the university. It was a good group, everyone was enjoying the vibe. This evening was one of my last ones before I’d leave this city for good, so I tried my best taking in every second. My best friend and I were trying to finish up the XL-sized pizza we’d ordered for just the two of us in a desperate moment of appetite. Beer bottles clanked as we were toasting to basically nothing while trying to come up for good reasons. ‘To an end of a good summer!’, ‘to happiness and love!’, ‘to surviving the next school year!’. Eventually, he got up and raised his half empty bottle. ‘To your new life away from here,’ he said, and smiled into my eyes. It was almost midnight when we decided to hit up a bar. My best friend and I made our way down the stairway first. Outside of the building, she lit up a cigarette and gave me a calculating look. ‘What?’, I asked, even though I already knew the answer. I knew she didn’t like him at all, and she’d secretly never approved of any kind of association he and I ever had. I’d told her so many times that I was done with him, just to forget about it the next week and to end up being with him again. For the longest time, colliding with him had seemed inevitable, but before summer, she’d sensed it was different, so she’d confessed me that she’d always felt that he was bad for me and that she was glad to see me finally moving on. ‘Nice jacket,’ she said eventually. I was wearing his dark blue bomber jacket because I’d been cold on the balcony. ‘Just tell me what you really want to tell me.’ I hated playing this game where I already knew what she was going to say but had to try several times to get it out of her. ‘You’re both flirting with each other again,’ she said, ‘do you want that?’ ‘We’re not, come on!’ ‘Yes you are.’ She flicked off the cigarette on the ground. ‘He has a girlfriend. And I know her. I’d never want to ruin a relationship, that’s not who I am. Believe me, nothing’s going on,’ I assured her. I didn’t know if I was trying to convince her or myself. ‘Let’s go!’ The group came to join us outside, they were in a very good, slightly tipsy mood. I laughed as two of them took my hands and dragged me to walk. ‘Let’s get more beer!’ He wasn’t there and I would’ve asked where he was, but my best friend caught me looking around. So I just shouted ‘yes, let’s go drink!’, and walked faster, hoping he’d catch up with us quickly, hoping he’d know where we were going. We were walking for a while when I heard his voice. ‘There you are!’, he said, breathlessly. He’d run all the way, he told me while jokingly pretending to be sad we’d left without him. I was just so glad he made it and all I wanted was to hug him. As we were getting drunker, we moved closer and closer. I could feel his breath on my neck, his thighs touching my thighs, his hand accidentally – or not so accidentally – brushing against mine. I was close to letting myself enjoy it, enjoy him, enjoy his attention, as my best friend pulled me up and pushed me outside to get some air. ‘Come on,’ she said, ‘don’t act as if nothing’s going on. It’s so obvious, and by the way, not only for me. Do you really want to continue like this and have people gossiping about you two and ruin their relationship?’ I was annoyed. ‘We didn’t do anything,’ I snapped back. ‘Besides, it’s not my job to keep their relationship intact. I’m allowed to have a good time and enjoy his company. Nothing happened, so please stop making such a scene out of it.’ ‘I’m sorry,’ she apologized. ‘I just don’t want you to get hurt. I saw you this summer, and you were just so upset because of him. I don’t want this to happen to you again. But maybe he’s changed, maybe he’s not that asshole anymore.’ She smiled, trying to light up the mood. ‘I’ll try to be really nice to him, okay? Tell me I’m doing a good job.’ She boxed me teasingly, trying to make me laugh. We were still outside talking about the heaviness of farewells and the lightness of new beginnings as he came to join us. He looked so handsome, and I had to refuse the urge to pull him closer to feel his warmth. ‘What are you talking about in such secrecy?’, he asked, curiosity blinking up in his eyes. My best friend and I laughed. ‘I’ll go inside to have another drink,’ she excused herself. It was just the two of us. ‘So, tell me the real reason you were so mad at me this summer,’ he suddenly demanded. Surprised by his straightforwardness, I didn’t know what to say. ‘To be honest, I don’t remember anymore,’ I confessed. ‘I remember being upset about you, but believe me, I don’t recall what made me so angry.’ He didn’t seem convinced. ‘You and I both know after which incident this started. Don’t you remember? I’m sure you just don’t want to tell me.’ I shook my head. ‘You think I was pissed because you started dating your girlfriend? Bullshit. I was so glad it was working out and now I couldn’t be happier for both of you.’ He didn’t say anything, he just studied me carefully which made me feel slightly uncomfortable. ‘Let’s go inside and join the others,’ I proposed. It was almost 2 a.m., the bar was about to close. ‘Last round!’, the barkeeper shouted, and the staff was already putting the empty chairs up on the tables. ‘I think we’re drunk enough’, I said, laughing. ‘Yeah,’ he agreed, ‘we don’t want anything bad to happen.’ He winked at me, and I blushed unintentionally. We were playing games with the beer bottles just to keep our hands busy and I acted as if I couldn’t feel our chemistry and our attraction towards each other at all. When he put his hand on my leg and started to stroke it gently, I pretended not to notice it while all I wanted was to feel his hands everywhere. When he bit his lower lip, I quickly looked away because all I could think of was kissing those beautiful lips. I had to force my whole body with all my strength not to react to these intense temptations and reminded myself every ten seconds that he had a girlfriend whom I didn’t want to cause any pain. Eventually, the whole crowd stumbled outside. The air was chilly, which was a definite sign that summer was over, and I was glad he’d given me his jacket. Everyone was checking the train timetable. ‘I’m too drunk to do that,’ I laughed while more than half of the group was already leaving as their train was departing in a few minutes. My best friend had to walk to the opposite direction than the train station, so we hugged each other goodbye. The others were heading to the station, but he didn’t move. ‘So you still don’t remember the reason?’, he asked. I’d known he’d bring it up again so I was prepared for my answer this time. ‘No, I don’t, and I’m sorry,’ I apologized. ‘I had no right to be so mad at you and to ignore you completely. I really am sorry, and I hope we can forget about this whole thing.’ He didn’t answer. Instead, he took my hands and looked me in my eyes. Instinctively, I looked around, but everyone was gone already and nobody could see us. I really wanted to pull his face to mine and kiss him, but I knew I couldn’t. So I hugged him tight and held onto him as if he was the last person I’d ever be able to touch. ‘I’m really going to miss you,’ he whispered in my ear, ‘you mean so much to me. You always have. I really, really like you. So much.’ I couldn’t resist anymore. I looked up to him, saw his sky-blue eyes and let him do what I’d been wanting him to do the whole time. His kisses were sweet, and so familiar. I felt so much warmth, so much safety. I wanted this moment to never end, I wanted him to never stop. It was me who stopped as the kisses were getting more passionate and demanding. ‘You shouldn’t do this,’ I mumbled, pushing him away. He looked at the floor, guilt all over his face. He didn’t say anything, just continued stroking his hand through my hair while realizing what just happened. ‘I’m sorry,’ I said, even though I knew exactly it wasn’t on me to apologize. ‘Me too,’ he answered softly. He continued, ‘I really like you and I’d really like you to come to my place with me – not only because you missed your train and have to wait forever, but because I’d really love to have you with me tonight.’ I wanted to say something, but all I could do was to shake my head almost invisibly. He went on, taking my hands. ‘I could say “whatever, I already cheated on my girlfriend” now and be an asshole, but I shouldn’t. I still have the chance to prevent this from getting worse’ I nodded. ‘Yes, absolutely. I can wait for my train, that’s not a problem. You should go home.’ ‘I’m sorry. I would’ve let you stay at my place so that you don’t have to wait in the cold, but I can’t trust myself around you.’ I smiled. ‘We’re doing the right thing now,’ I assured him. The goodbye was bittersweet. After I waited for him to get a cab for himself as it only took him five minutes by car, I made my way to the station. I was shaking, but I wasn’t cold. A tear dropped onto my cheek and I quickly wiped it off, surprised about how deeply emotional this had hit me. As I sat down on a bench at the station, I felt that something had shifted inside me. Something had come to an end. Something had moved, had made space for new beginnings. That’s when I realized: He and I, it was over. It would never happen again. As I took a deep breath in, I noticed his distinct smell on the jacket he’d left me.

farewell night of september 15th, 2017

#personal #story #excerpt #excerpt from a story i'll never write #life #love #true #spilled ink #thoughts #writing #text #mine #memory #memories

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woodlandlesbian · 7 years

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Tonight, after weeks of staring at a blank screen, willing myself to get the words out, mostly just crying in front of a blank screen, I've finally got my feelings on screen. We're going to try something a little different. Not so much in the voice of my writing but in the style itself. Tonight, instead of memories, I'm going to go through by person. The last year of my life has been utter hell, and in true fashion of myself I bottled that shit into the finest wine possible, corked it and have let it ferment until it was so rich if you were to drink it you'd be drunk off one drop. So, in order to process through my feelings I've found that going from person to person is much easier than going by current emotions. I won't name anyone by person, but I'll be sure to make it known who you are as you read. Buckle up, were gonna get crazy. So read on.

When you're the middle of seven what they forget to tell you is you become the wallflower of the family. Seeing all the things in a perspective from the outside looking in. Watching the hurricane of a family life whirl around you, the winds caused by other siblings knocking the breath from your family as if a child had taken their first big fall and the wind being taken from their lungs. My sister was 14 when she didn't come home. My father was away on a work related operation. My mother called the police after 12 hours of her not coming home. They told her it wasn't a missing persons report until she had been missing for 24 hours. Call back later. My mother bawled over a child that wasn't even hers. Her step daughter. But loved and raised all the same. She sobbed, head bent over her kitchen table, begging them to help her. She was still in her pajamas, a purple Eeyore set from the night before, the sun already setting on the day. Her hair stuck out in every direction, greasy from her hands constantly brushing it out of her face. I'll never forget the way she looked sitting in our bright, cheery, pale yellow kitchen. You see sister, you had told us two night before that you were going to stay with a girlfriend and you would be home the following evening. My parents were very lenient with those things up until that point. They had went through one of the longest, most drawn out custody battles known to man for you and our big brother. And this is how you repaid her. You lied to them. You twisted words, were vindictive and hateful, conniving and deceitful. And the icing on the cake was this grand lie. When you didn't come home and we called your friends mother. Nope, you hadn't been there. She spent hours driving the street hoping to find you. Instead you stayed two nights with your boyfriend. Your 21 year old boyfriend you claimed was 16. Yes I’m not stupid. Yes, I knew. I was 9. By the time you were 16 mom and dad had let you move back with your mother where you disappeared. For 10 years you came in and out of dads life. For 10 years you put a strain on their marriage and our family. And after 10 long years we rebuilt our family without you, expect for when you needed something. Then you swooped in and played on daddy's heart strings. and I sat, like a fly on the wall and watched. And here you are again after years of slandering him and then using him, and then slandering him, you are here again. You see dear sister. I’m not 9 anymore. I am grown, and the man you used and threw aside, the one you didn't want. I'll gladly take him. See what you didn’t realize in all your childish attitude and glory was that he is the best damn father anyone could ever ask for. But don't worry. You left your mark on our family, on my family. Dads refusal to let me have any kind of Independence. The things even the most sheltered kids could do I was banned from. School dances, nope. Roller skating on Friday nights, nope. Being out past 5:30 pm, no. Sleepovers were never allowed unless they were requested 2 days in advanced and took place at home, where I could be monitored. I could never go to the mall with my friends or go to the movies with them. My dates were chaperoned until I was 16. I wasn't even allowed to drive until I was almost 18 years old. I spent my whole life barred inside because of you. My father went from a loving, goofy, wild, enjoyable man to a stoic, silent, stiff lipped man. His smile that wrinkled his eyes and sent his cheek bones high up on his face went slack, never reaching past the corners of his mouth, painful almost. And it seems my sweet sister, that every time he finally smiles a real smile again you show up. It’s like a calling beacon. you get that tingle in your fingers to start skimming through your arsenal of what you can use to rip as all apart again.

The first time I laid eyes on you my stomach went straight through the floors and fell into the bedroom of some silly air crewman's floor. I will ever forget how absolutely stunning you were, and that i wasn't wearing a bra. I think about you very often, damn ear daily. You are the one that got away. as i sit here typing I’m talking to you. and just thinking about that makes my stomach twitch. I’m not sure if its with a pain of longing or with a twit of giddy at knowing I will lay eyes on your smile sooner than later. You see babyboy, you were the most unexpected love I’ve ever had. Your love came so fast and pure that i don't think there has ever been anything like it on the face of the earth. I cherish the memories i have with you. I no longer can watch orange is the new black without thinking of the way you kissed me. your lips so sure against mine, soft and sure. i loved you then and i love you now. you say love comes and goes, but baby boy i disagree. once you love you ove forever. you may no longer be in love, but love itself stays strong as long as its true. Maybe i was always meant to be a mother. Because each night i hoped you would come to my room, drunk and stumbling, where i would take off your shoes and glasses, grab a Gatorade and snuggle you into my tiny twin sized bed ad put you to sleep. Caring for your heart was my greatest pleasure... until the day i broke it. Looking back at that weekend, and the choices i made and where it has lead me now i can't believe i was so careless. Talking to you sometimes becomes so overwhelming. but like the godly forgiver you are you remained kind to me. you stayed a friend and listened to me poor my heart out over all the pain im currently am going through. but do not think that i don't catch some of your light flirting baby boy. do not think that the few times we've face timed over the past year that my heart didn't give a squeeze. The blood still rushes to my cheeks whenever you smile at me or even when you send the winks and blown kiss emojis, even out of sarcasm. Thank you. for every moment from the day you changed my laundry to right now as you tell me about your coffee shop dreams. for every moment you lent your ear to my secrets and stresses and your neck to my kisses. For staying modest with my indiscretions. and for opening the eyes of a straight little white girl and confusing the shit out of my body because dear lord watching you undress was a gift sent straght from the heavens.

My soon to be past and still my forever future. For the rest of my life i will have to look you in the eye and wonder why i wasn't good enough for you to love. Why was i so easy to give up on? The day i said for better or for worse i meant it. so why was it that i wasn't worth it? why was going out and partying, and spending money we didn't have, or sleeping with woman that weren't me worth it over face timing your daughter and your wife? The obstacles that i conquered in order to be once again in your arms and this is what i have to show for it. But, even as i type this i am slowly realizing i am better than this. after hours of sitting in the shower bawling, nights of not eating, lack of sleep and weeks where i missed days of work trying to get this figured out i realized i am worth it. Through this all i was shown a lot of things. The first being that the friends i gave up in order to make you happy never truly left me, they took a step back and waited for me. Waited for me to fall so they could pick me back up. through the "have you eaten today", the "Let me give the baby a bath tonight you go relax" the "Were making dinner tonight go take a shower" through the " well take the baby today get some sleep" i realized i do have people who support me. You may have never supported me, but they do, and they have shown me when you couldn't that love is shown in all different ways, and just because you don't love me doesn't mean that no one loves me, it just means that i am worth being loved by the ones who mattered. though you mattered to me i didn't matter to you. And with time ill be able to hold my head a little higher each time i see you. And maybe one day, at our daughters birthday party, kindergarten graduation, wedding or birth of our grandchildren ill be able to look at you with a not only forgiveness but happiness that we are both were we deserve to be in life.

Id like to say i remember the day i met you but i don't. Id like to say i remember the first conversation we ever had but unfortunately i don't. I do remember where you were the day i graduated boot camp, i do remember what you were wearing the day you graduated high school. i know you shoe size, and what your hair feels like falling through my fingers is memorized. i know the color of each ring of your iris. I know the groves of you finger nail that you tore the tendons from when we were in high school and had to have fixed. I remember what it felt like to watch you hold my daughter for the first time. I remember how bad it hurts to watch you leave after every visit. you have been by my side for almost 8 years. you held my hand through every heart break, and almost killed the first one on multiple occasions. i think he still is in therapy for it to be honest. And i don't think i ever properly thanked you for the amount of time you have put into me. my dear best friend. you are the true love of my life.

Because i know a certain someone is waiting to read i’m posting half now. I still have so much more to write. but your piece is here. and as time grows and i finally make it across the world, id like to see where it goes. we are both different people now, but that's what happens as the tides of life change babyboy, and i look forward to our coffee gossip dates and seeing that sweet, sweet smile light up the town again. Remember to drink shock top for me.

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purplesurveys · 7 years

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138

Which of your 5 senses would you give up? Like, none of them. It’s very fortunate that I have them all in the first place. One word that doesn't describe you: Extroverted. Would you ever consider becoming a nun? Fuck no. I grew up in Catholic school and we had to visit the nuns’s convent for adoration every once in a while - you do you, but it sucks thinking about the monotony of the place. It’s so quiet, and if you’re not eating, you’re praying. Not the life for me. What do you miss most about your childhood? Actually playing outside. I didn’t have much of a childhood, but I did get to do that. What do the majority of people think of you? You’ll have to ask them, but my hunch is that I’m nice but can be mysterious since I don’t let many people in. I know most think I’m quiet though - that’s not very hard to take away from me.

Have you ever washed your phone when doing laundry? Nope, but it’s happened to bills and coins. Do you like your first name? I hated it for the longest time since I was bullied for it, but idk, I’ve been coming to terms with it recently. What makes you laugh? A lot. I’m not difficult to please. Do you ever keep arguing when you know you're wrong? I normally avoid confrontation to begin with, so this doesn’t happen a lot. I’ve only ever fought seriously with my girlfriend, but it’s different every time. Sometimes I’ll argue back despite being wrong; but there are days that I’d drop it and apologize. What is something you find yourself saying a lot? “Sorry”

Your Internet service goes down. What would you miss the most? YouTube :( If you suddenly turned into a dog or cat, how would you prove you're human? Hahahaha what. Er maybe do stuff dogs wouldn’t think of doing that would be noticeable? Maybe point directions? Play the PS4? I dunno, you got me on this one. Would you like to know the precise date of your future death? Yeah, so I don’t have to be taken by surprise with it. To me at least it would be a relief to know how long I still have. Do you believe in forever, as in 'love forever'? Sure, I give it a chance. Do you photograph well? Sadly no. I was into photography seven years ago and got an SLR to start my new hobby, but realized I wasn’t good at it despite trying. The talent belongs to my sister, who mostly uses the camera now and is the one who ended up in the arts field. Is joy more stressful than stress is joyful? Sure. When I feel happy I’m always anticipating something to go horribly wrong, so even in my happiness I do feel a sense of dread always, yes. What is your favorite flavor of coffee? I always get a caramel macchiato if I ever drink coffee, which I rarely rarely ever do these days. What non-obvious website should everyone check out? https://littlealchemy.com/. Do it, play it now. Are there any animals you flat out refuse to touch? Cockroaches. When was the last time you were up all night? Last May. I had a major report for my Journ class that my group mates decided to work on the night before, much to my disappointment. I procrastinate a lot, but I’m not that stupid. if you could have one thing right now what would it be? More time home. I don’t want to be back in school :( What do you put on your French fries? I sprinkle it with salt then prefer to dip it in mayonnaise. Have you ever been to the state of Washington? No. At what age did you feel you were an adult? I still don’t feel like one lol. What's your biggest 'first world' problem? Egh, I try not to do those. What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word fun? The FUN song from Spongebob. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy? More work that I do like. I hate being lethargic. Are you a hug or handshake person? Neither. In the Philippines we do beso, which is basically a cheek to cheek kiss. You can do it with people you are at least acquaintances with, and that’s my preferred mode of greeting. Have you ever received a swag bag? I don’t think I’d want to receive something called that. What holiday don't you like? Christmas makes me feel the loneliest. Do you speak any other languages? Yes, Filipino. How often do you wear jewelry? I have a piece of jewelry I wear everyday, but generally I’m not a big wearer of it since 1) I find it too flashy, and 2) I walk the streets of the Philippines, where it can be snatched in no time. I wear my fancy necklaces and bracelets out only when necessary, i.e. in parties. Do you think you are a hypochondriac? No. What age were you when you learned how to swim? 5. I was that age when my parents took me to bigger swimming pools. Can you whistle properly? Sure can. What brand of batteries do you usually get? I’ve never had to buy batteries on my own. What will instantly make your day? Learning I have a free-cut class. What super power would you refuse, if it was offered to you, and why? Strength. I don’t have much use for it. What's a small thing you take a stupid amount of pleasure in? When I’d see a dog in public and I’d start talking to it and the owners smile at me. Some people can be snobs so it feels nice when the owners themselves are friendly towards me. What's your favorite discontinued product that you wish would come back? Oreo goddamn O’s. If adults had show and tell, what would you bring into work? Show and tell isn’t a concept here so idk how that works. Do I bring something I like? In that case I’d bring my dog. Do you have a particular number that you see all the time? Sure. Whenever I look at the clock it always happens to be 4:21, which is my birthday. What are some things that are cheap, but bring you a lot of satisfaction? EVERYTHING CHEAP. My family isn’t very well off so I’m actually quite uncomfortable when dealing with pricey things. I’d rather hang out with street food, areas like Tondo in Manila, that kind of stuff. If you had a reset button for the last 10 years, would you press it? As much as I’d want to, no. It is what it is and it would be disrespectful to modify them in any way, especially having survived an awful childhood. Have you ever fired anyone? No, not in a work environment. I’ve cut off people from my life though, if we’re talking figuratively. City or nature person? City. Nature is nice once in a while but I can’t permanently live in it. Who is someone you would never swear in front of? My grandparents. Have you ever won a contest or competition? Sure, minor ones. Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your bed? The couch in our living room. How many social media sites are you registered with? Four, but I’ve been off social media for two weeks and only use one of them for now - obviously Tumblr. Would you rather go to Canada or California on vacation? Canada. Would you be surprised if Facebook started charging? No, but then again I wouldn’t be bothered because I don’t use Facebook. Do you sleep with the bedroom door open or closed? CLOSED. When have you felt most free? Probably when I got out of my mother. I’ve felt captured ever since. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Neither. I’d rather be looking at pictures...for one I’m terrible at finding the perfect angles, and I’m also awkward at doing poses and stances. I’d rather be the viewer and appreciate the photograph. Have you ever caught a fish? I’ve never even gone fishing before. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m. Who do you want it to be? Absolutely nobody. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? No, but my brother did that to himself with a nut when he was 3. Fun times. Which shoe do you put on first? Whatever happens to be closer to either of my feet. How many rings before you answer the phone? Depends. If I’m expecting something then obviously I’d pick it up right away. Other times I let it ring 4, 5 times. Would you ever consider living abroad? I am planning to live abroad. Have you ever ridden on a motorbike? Never. Those are super annoying in the Philippines - there are so many of them they almost feel like flies on the road. So never never jumping on that bandwagon. Do you like to dance? Never. When shopping for clothes, what most influences your buying choices? Just whatever I think would look nice on me. Brand is also somehow important too I guess. Who is your favorite TV character? Maggie Greene from The Walking Dead and Gus Fring from Breaking Bad.

#survey #surveys

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