#some angst for our boy

[afewproblems]

62 &/or 71 for platonic stobin perhaps?

62: It's okay to cry & 71: You are the single best thing to happen to me.

Thank you very much for this, I love these prompts and got real carried away with this! I hope you enjoy!

If you had asked Robin Buckley to describe her relationship with Steve Harrington back in her freshman year, she'd laugh in your face. 

Why on earth would King-Steve be caught talking to her, let alone do it enough to constitute a relationship?

He was a popular jock, and Robin was a freshie with a trumpet.

It wasn't how things worked.

Steve operated on the outside of her periphery. She had an awareness of him, his actions in the popular crowd. Like any minor celebrity, the gossip mill ran rampant with tales of King-Steve.

"Harrington scored the winning shot at last night's game! Not many Juniors get opportunities like that!"

"King-Steve told Tommy to leave Harvey alone cuz he's just a freshie, saved him from a swirlie -swear to God man".

“Yeah well, I heard he broke Byer’s camera the other day, so--”

"Have you seen his hair, ugh he's so dreamy!"

To which Robin thought, 'I've seen him leave half a bagel of crumbs all over his English notes, how dreamy can he be?'

And to top it all off, Tammy Thompson wouldn't stop staring at him, twirling her long blond hair around her pink varnished nails while reading sonnets from Romeo and Juliet loudly at her cafeteria table, trying valiantly to catch his eye --peak romance right there.

But Robin wasn't quite ready to think about how much she wished Tammy would bat those long lashes at her, nah, hating Steve Harrington was easier. 

Besides, he had no idea she existed, right? 

Robin grabs a can of Coke from the fridge, reaching into her pocket for change before joining her mother at the till.

The corner store was all the way out on Main Street, but still closer to home than Mevalds or the grocer on Parsons so Mrs Buckley had stopped for a few things on their way back from Robin's band practice. 

She slides the change onto the counter and pops the tab before throwing a thumb over her shoulder, "I'll go wait by the car mum". 

Mrs.Buckley nods distractedly, waving her hand with a smile and she hunts through her purse for her checkbook.

Robin makes her way down the aisle to the entrance, the little bell above the door jingles lightly. She steps over the threshold into cool November air and shrugs her jacket collar up against the chill. 

She sighs as she looks back through the window, her mom seems to be taking her sweet time, chatting with the clerk now and going through her checkbook with a smile. 

A muffled groan catches her attention from across the lot, she tilts her head towards the sound and startles when she spots Steve Harrington, the bane of her existence, leaning against a car with a can of soda pressed to his beaten bloody face. 

He hasn't seen her, his eyes are trained at a point just ahead of him as he rolls the can over his split cheek. 

What the hell?

Robin leans away, keeping herself behind her mom's station wagon and out of his sight line. 

Who would have kicked the shit out of old King-Steve? And where were his two cronies Hagan and Perkins? She had so many questions and--

Steve sniffs once, pushing the heel of his free hand into his eye as he drops the hand holding the can.

Oh.

Robin suddenly feels as though she's intruding on something private. Watching this boy she's never talked to, who she saw last Monday walking with the rest of the basketball team into the cafeteria, Nancy Wheeler hanging off his arm with an affectionate roll of her eyes and the biggest grin plastered all over his dumb face.

But this Steve is hurt and alone and smaller than she's ever seen him before.

It's bizarre.

Suddenly he's moving, throwing the can to the gravel and stepping off the car before sliding his arm across his face in one motion, he clears his throat and throws open the driver's side door.

The engine of his beemer roars to life just as Robin's mother exits the store, she frowns as Steve peels out of the parking lot, brakes squealing.

"Honestly, why they give teenagers licenses, I'll never know," Mrs.Buckley mutters under her breath as she unlocks the car and hands Robin the paper bag, "do you know that boy?"

Robin watches as the tail lights of Steve's car disappear around the corner, the image of his hunched shoulders and black eye branded in her mind's eye. 

Robin shrugs once as she opens the passenger door, "Not really".  

***

It's not until two years later that Robin crosses paths with Steve again, slinging ice cream with the former King down at the new mall.

Her first job and it’s at some horrible sailor themed ice cream shop of all places and to top it all off, she’s stuck with Steve Harrington.

Sure, she'd seen him in passing at school, watching as he slowly fell away from the popular crowd. While it was somewhat satisfying to see Tammy pretend she had never really been interested in the former King of Hawkins High, she couldn't help but remember the way Steve looked that day, face bloody, holding a cold can of pop to the worst of the bruises.

Robin can't help but wonder just what had suddenly turned Harrington's life completely on its head that day. She'd heard it was Jonathan that had beaten him up, but given how weirdly close he, Nancy, and Steve got after that cold November day, she didn't really believe it. 

Wasn't he rich too? He drove a BMW to work for chrissakes. So why was he here?

And then there’s the kids. 

They follow him around like ducklings, begging for rides during his spare time and free samples of ice cream on the days he’s working.

It would be endearing with anyone else, but it’s Steve Harrington. 

They've been working with one another for about two weeks before it happens again.

Robin idly sprays the glass display case with the spray bottle from the back. Whatever green liquid is in the unlabeled bottle smells absolutely foul but it's the only thing in the store powerful enough to get rid of all the finger and face prints on the glass from kids standing on their tiptoes to see the flavors.

They end up having to clean the customer side of the window far more often than their employee side and normally she and Steve will flip a coin for it.

Neither of them enjoy being out from behind the counter, the shorts and the socks are reason enough for this, but it also has the negative effect of piquing enough customer interest to interrupt their down time, like the movement and streak free glass shine draws their eyes.

But, nine times out of ten Steve would ‘lose’ and pick up the spray bottle without complaint. 

Robin had started to wonder if he was doing it on purpose, but why the hell would Harrington do something like that? 

She wrinkles her freckled nose and starts wiping the glass, clearing away the smudges and dirt before spraying again to get at the more stubborn fingerprints.

Steve is late today, which is weird. 

Another surprise from Hawkins golden-boy, Robin would have expected Steve to waltz in twenty minutes late to every shift, with a scowl on his face and a refusal to pull his weight. 

But it was the opposite. 

Steve would get there early, he would review the cleaning list for the day, check the inventory to see what ice creams would need to be restocked and what the special was for the day. 

The only thing Steve had ever asked her to do, was to write out the specials on the board. 

When Robin had scoffed and asked why he couldn't do it himself, Steve had gotten very quiet, chewed his lip for a beat and said, "I don't want to mess it up, or have you have to redo it for me". 

Steve shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets, "sometimes the letters are weird when I read and then it makes it harder to write them out”.

He sighs but it comes out more like a scoff, “there’s a reason I’m still here Buckley”.

Oh…so the golden boy of Hawkins High would not be leaving for college in the fall then. 

He looked at her, his big eyes traced over her face as though he were looking for any hint of a laugh.

And what else could she do in the moment but pick up the dry erase marker and shoulder him out of the way of the board with a, ‘you owe me dingus’. 

She turned her face away at the small smile Steve gave her, ignoring the twinge in her chest at his tiny confession. 

God Dammit, he was not endearing, he wasn’t!

Robin balls up the rag she used to wipe down the glass and looks up to the wall clock on the far side of the food court. 

It’s nearly eleven in the morning and Steve is still not here, she’s tempted to use the phone in the back to call his house when she remembers she has no clue what his phone number is or if it would even be listed.

She’s sure he’s scheduled with her today; it’s Tuesday, they always work Tuesdays together. 

Robin looks around the food court, scoping out the entrances and nearby tables. There’s no sign of him, no obnoxious hair, no big goofy grin, or big hazel eyes to be found. 

She huffs and makes her way to the back room, pushing the swing door open hard enough that it makes a satisfying bang against the wall. 

She freezes at the sudden yelp from the back corner. 

Steve whirls away from her, his face tipped into his open locker, his shoulders are a tense hunched line. It's a horribly familiar pose and once again Robin can’t help but feel like she’s witnessing something she shouldn’t.

“Steve?” she says softly, taking another step into the room, “whats--”

“I know I’m late,” he mumbles, the words are tight but there’s no waiver to them, “sorry”.

Robin wishes she were better at this sort of thing --her mom always seemed to know what to do and what to say when people were upset. That skill definitely skipped a generation in her case. 

He turns to face her, slowly, one hand on his nose, the other holding his wrist against his chest.

There’s an ugly, rapidly purpling bruise running down his arm where it’s cradled. The shape is strange, almost as if someone had grabbed him - it runs around the entire circumference of his forearm and--

Oh.

Steve eyes her challengingly but there’s no real heat in it, his eyes slightly shiny in the awful humming fluorescent lights.

“Actually,” Robin swallows roughly after nearly a full minute, clearing her throat as she leans back on her heels, “Uh, Marcus said we only needed one person on today, it’s slow as shit so,” she shrugs and tilts her head to the employee entrance, “you could go home if you want”.

Steve stares at her, his eyes raking over her face the same way he did after the white board incident, before he sniffs once and shakes his head, muttering under his breath that he’d rather get hit by a bus and Robin stiffens at the implication.

“You’re a terrible liar Buckley,” he says eventually, closing his locker and running a slightly shaky hand through his hair before walking towards her and the storefront, “but thanks,” Steve says softly as he passes. 

“Does that mean I can go home?” Robin calls after him, immediately wincing but pleased at the startled laugh she hears from the counter.

She follows him out front, slowly, suddenly feeling with absolute certainty that she really doesn’t know Steve Harrington at all.

***

Robin never thought she would be here. 

Not once did she think she would have ever come out to someone while she was still in highschool, let alone the former King of Hawkins high who would in turn become her best friend, her platonic soul-mate if you would. 

After the debacle that was their official last shift with Scoops Ahoy and the Russian Spy Alternate dimension bullshit where Steve risked his damn life to save her and the kids --who all knew about this monster filled Upside Down just by the by. 

So many things suddenly made so much sense, Steve and his injuries over the years, his weird relationship with Nancy and Jonathan, even the sudden personality 180.

And through the truth serum, the torture, the fire, and running down another car driven by a maniac from California, Steve was there to hold her hand, and Robin is infinitely grateful for it.

They take a job together at Family Video, attached at the hip ever since the mall burned down in July; the video store is one of the few places still hiring that summer that pays a dollar above minimum wage. 

It’s not exactly glamorous, it’s mostly restocking the shelves and rewinding tapes but it’s easy and the hours are good. 

She and Steve are able to get their shifts together most of the time, they both know this is so Keith can avoid working with Steve directly -a bonus if there ever was one. 

Things have been quiet ever since Billy’s death and the Mind Flayer’s obliteration from their world, but it’s been especially quiet since the Byer’s packed up and moved to California. 

Most of that seems to be influenced by the cloud of sadness that has draped itself over the rest of the kids and Nancy -who has been coming by more and more lately, stopping in at Family Video and lingering in the evenings, chatting with Steve while Robin shelves the returns. 

It wouldn’t even have made a blip on Robin’s radar if not for the way Steve would shut down for the rest of their close after Nancy left. 

He refuses to speak more than one word answers, refuses to engage with Robin’s one sided bantering as she balances the till and shuts down the neon Open sign.

It’s nothing like after she saw the bruises at Scoops, nothing like the quiet acknowledgement that the Harrington house wasn’t all money and sunshine the way she thought it was. 

And Robin doesn’t know what to do about it.

It’s been going on for weeks now, and she’ll be starting school again soon. She won't be able to take the same number of shifts as she could over the summer months, and Robin has no idea what will happen when she’s not there as a buffer anymore.

It’s the last week of August when she brings it up to him.

“Steve?” she says as she hands him another copy of The Terminator tape for him to rewind; it’s nearly nine at night and Nancy hasn’t been by at all today. Robin’s stomach has been in knots watching Steve watch the windows for her all night. 

He tilts his head and quirks an eyebrow at her as Robin breathes in deeply through her nose, her heart suddenly in her throat. 

“Just,” she bites her lip, “what is going on with you and Nancy?” 

Oh, perfect, real subtle.

All at once Steve’s face shutters.  

“No, come on, don’t do that,” Robin wheedles, stepping in front of him, “Steve, just talk to me--”

“There’s nothing to talk about, just drop it Robin,” he bites out as he steps around her to grab the returns cart and wheel it over to the New Release shelf.

“No, nope,” she huffs, walking quickly to the other side of the cart and grab the handles, “this is against all the laws of best-friendom”.

“That's not a word,” he mumbles tiredly, reaching up to pinch his nose and close his eyes. 

Ah shit. 

“Dingus, Steve,” Robin says softly as she lets go of the handles and steps closer into his space, “talk to me?”

Steve hesitates, seeming to chew the words or the inside of his cheek - she can’t quite tell at this point, before he blinks once, twice, his eyes rapidly becoming shinier by the second.

Oh double shit.

He shakes his head and turns away from her sharply and Robin doesn’t know what to do with her hands as Steve takes a deep wobbly breath. 

“It’s okay you know,” she finds herself saying softly as she takes a step closer, “to cry?”

Steve barks out a wet laugh and shakes his head again, still not looking at her.

“I don’t know what to do, like literally,” Robin whispers in a panicked voice, “can I, I mean, do you want a hug?”

He nods but doesn’t move as Robin steps even closer to wrap her arms loosely around his waist, he’s stiff in her embrace but slowly begins to relax the longer they stand there - as though he’s not used to something like this.

“You don’t have to tell me anything, but I am here if you want to talk, or if you even just want to vent - man I want to vent,” Robin says, pulling back slightly to look Steve in the eyes, “don’t take this the wrong way, but what the hell is Nancy doing?”

Steve stills in her arms but she keeps going, “honestly, aren’t she and Jonathan still dating?” 

“Like I get that he’s all the way in California but why is she coming in here, and don’t tell me it's about the movies --she never asks me to help find anything, just you, and half the time she doesn't even end up renting anything?”

Robin stops as Steve’s breath hitches once, “it's not fair to you,” she finishes lamely, her voice petering out as Steve nods and sighs, finally bringing his own arms around Robin’s shoulders to draw her closer and bury his face in her hair.

“Thank you,” he whispers in her ear as he squeezes her tight enough to leave her nearly breathless.

“You’re the only person I can actually talk to that won’t think less of me about, about everything,” he whispers into her hair, Robin’s hands twitch as she fists his work vest between her fingers. 

“I think, you are the single best thing to have happened to me in the last like, two years Robs,” the words are constricted, as though he has to drag them out, “and…I need to tell you something”.

Robin nods as he pulls away this time to look at her, his red rimmed eyes trace over her face, just like they had at Scoops all those months ago.

“I,” he swallows and drops his gaze to the floor, “I don’t…feel that way about Nancy anymore,” Steve says quietly. 

“But you seem so upset whenever she leaves, you were looking for her today?” Robin says, confusion painting her words. 

Steve sighs and tips his head back this time, looking at the ceiling as though the answer is hidden among the ceiling tiles and water stains. 

“It's complicated, I…” his mouth opens and closes for a beat, “I am sad for her that Jonathan is gone - he was a better fit for Nancy, way better than me,” he mutters and looks at Robin once more. 

“And I know what she's doing, coming in here all the time, she’s lonely, but that's not why I’m upset Birdy”.

Robin frowns, “then what--”

“There’s this guy,” Steve blurts out, speaking over her in a rush.

Robin feels herself stop breathing, what?

His chest begins to rise and fall rapidly as he continues, “I-I’ve never told anyone this before”.

“Okay, okay,” Robin whispers, rubbing soothing circles into his back as he moves even closer and drops his head to her shoulder. 

“I don’t know what to do,” he murmurs into her vest and hair, his breath warm and wet as his chest stutters and heaves. 

“It’s okay,” she says again, repeating the words she’s told herself the last three years, “you’re okay”.

“Loving Nancy is easy, but I…” he sniffs and breathes out, Robin feels a gathering wetness on her shoulder but it only makes her hug him harder.

“But you don’t,” she says softly, finishing his sentence for him.

Steve nods and lets out another shaky breath, finally lifting his face from her shoulder.

He’s a mess, face red and blotchy, tear tracks and snot shine in the streetlights from outside the video store window. Steve’s eyes are red and puffy and his mouth has stretched into an uncharacteristic frown that makes Robin’s chest ache. 

Now Robin’s mother may have been an expert on making people feel better no matter the occasion, but Robin was an expert on putting her foot in her mouth and making Steve laugh.

And the latter felt much more appropriate at this moment. 

“I mean, you’ve come to the right person at any rate,” she says sagely, reaching up to wipe a loose tear from his nose, he snorts and bats her hand away.

“I’m serious, if anyone is an expert in gay pining, it’s me, I’ve seen it all, if you want pointers in watching from afar and daydreaming about your illegal wedding, I’m your lady”.

Steve laughs and steps back to wipe his face roughly with both hands, it does nothing to sooth the puffy skin beneath his eyes but at least the last trace of tears are gone. 

“I’m also an expert,” she chews her lip for a moment, considering carefully how to put it into words, “on how all of this feels, and how new and scary it can be,” she says softly, “trust me, I’ve been there”. 

Steve nods, his eyes shining all over again as he tugs Robin closer into another bone crushing hug.

Just in time for the bell above the door to chime. 

Well shit.

They step away from one another, glad for the distance from the front door to the counter, knowing exactly how that might have looked to the average customer so late into the evening.

“Hey man,” Robin calls out as Steve turns away from the door to hide his face, “just letting you know we close in five so…”

The man nods, he looks familiar, Robin’s fairly certain she’s seen him at school but she can’t remember the name. 

His wild curly hair and jean vest decked out in patches and pins scream, ‘Metal-Head’, as does the ever present cloud of tobacco and weed smell that follows him and around the shelves. He makes a beeline for the small horror section at the back and grabs a tape before making his way to the counter. 

“No worries Buckley, knew exactly what I wanted, I won’t hold you and Harrington up --hey man,” he says brightly, two dimples bloom as he smiles in Steve's direction who flinches at being addressed. 

Steve slowly turns and tries for a smile, “hey Eddie,” he mumbles.

Eddie’s smile drops as his eyes trace over Steve’s face, “woah, what happened sweet-uh,” he looks at Robin once before moving back to Steve, “dude, uh, sweet dude?”

Oh no fucking way.

Steve clears his throat, his cheeks slowly getting pinker the longer Eddie and Robin stare at him, “nothing, I promise, um are you still okay to take Dustin to Indy tomorrow to the hobby shop?”

Eddie nods and smiles, though there’s still a hint of worry in his eyes as he slides the tape over the counter, “wouldn’t miss it, gotta get that kid ready for Hellfire initiation after all,” he says with a wink.

“I figured if you didn’t have anything after we could watch this at mine,” Eddie continues nervously this time, gesturing to the tape Steve scans through. 

For the third time since she’s known Steve, Robin feels as though she’s witnessing something she shouldn’t, only this time it doesn’t fill her with anxiety or uncertainty, and she’s never felt more invisible.

“I’d like that,” Steve says softly as Eddie beams at him, wrapping his knuckles against the counter as he hands Steve three one dollar bills.

“Sounds like a plan my liege,” Eddie hums as he bows with a flourish, coaxing a laugh out of Steve who is smiling like a loon beside Robin, “you bring the popcorn, I’ll take care of everything else,” he calls over his shoulder as he walks backwards towards the entrance before tipping an imaginary hat in farewell as he disappears out the door.

“That is not pining!” Robin shrieks as she whirls around on Steve the moment they see Eddie get into his van, “that was full blown flirting, how long has this been going on??”

“I’m sorry--”

“Nuh uh, you’ve been getting kissy with him, and you didn’t tell me? You got to have your first kiss before me??”

“We haven’t kissed Robin, christ we haven’t done anything--”

“Life is so fucking unfair, you had to be a ‘ladies’ and a ‘man’s’ man, huh?” She scoffs as she walks to the front of the store and switches off the sign and bolts the door for good measure.

Robin turns around only to find Steve staring at her, a nervous expression warps his normally handsome face.

Dammit.

She rolls her eyes and sighs, “I am still so proud of you for telling me, but you have to admit this is unjust,” she mutters in what she hopes is a reassuring voice.

“You think he likes me then?” Steve wonders aloud as he looks from Robin to the door that Eddie left through with a small smile.

Robin drops her face into her hands, this is the man she’s chosen for her platonic soul-mate?

“You are literally going on a date tomorrow,” she grumbles irritatedly, “I watched him ask you out, not even ten seconds ago Steve”.

The smile he sends her way is blinding, and once again Robin is reminded just how much she loves this doofus, how she never would have imagined herself here as a freshman with a trumpet.

“You are calling me after,” she demands as Steve pops the till to begin cashing out while Robin hops up to sit on the counter and fill out the paperwork, “if I can’t teach you about pining then you damn well owe me a class about dating”.

Steve laughs brightly as he lays down the bills and change, giving Robin a soft grin which she returns, finally feeling as though she knows Steve Harrington much better than most.

#platonic stobin #i went with one sided enemies to friends to platonic soulmates #steve harrington #stranger things #robin buckley #platonic soulmates #prompt list ask game #thank you very much for this one #as you can see I got very carried away #presteddie #eddie munson #afewproblems answers #afewproblems writes #implied child abuse #some angst for our boy #angst with a happy ending

[estrellami-1]

First Cuts

Part 1 | Part 2

“Hey,” Steve says breathlessly. “Y’know that thing that we are not mentioning, ever, on pain of death?”

Eddie blinks. “Y’know you’re still mentioning it even if you don’t call it what it is, right?”

“Eddie,” Steve says seriously, which causes Eddie to focus. “I need your help. I’m kinda freaking out, here.”

“Okay,” Eddie says, running through things in his mind. “Want me to come over? Or wanna come over here? Or just over the phone?”

“I’m stressed out enough I can’t make any decisions right now,” Steve says.

“Okay,” Eddie says, “then I’m coming over. Unlock the door for me, ‘kay? I’ll be there in ten.”

“M’kay. Thank you.” With a click he’s gone, and Eddie hangs his phone back up too, looking around for his keys.

He snatches them off the counter, jams his feet into his shoes, and takes off.

He realizes halfway there that he’s still in his pajamas.

He walks in when he arrives to find Steve sitting at the table, staring at an envelope like he’s trying to disintegrate it with just his vision. Eddie thinks he can almost see the paper smoking. “Hey,” he says softly. “What’s going on?”

Steve doesn’t meet his eyes, just keeps his gaze locked on the envelope. “I did something impulsive. And Robin doesn’t know. And either nothing changes, or everything does.” He lifts his face to Eddie’s. His bottom lip is bitten raw.

“Okay,” Eddie says. “Well, first things first is to figure out which of those options it is, right? I’m assuming the letter will determine which it is.”

“Yeah,” Steve says, reaching for it, only to push it towards Eddie. “I, uh. I applied to a specific school. And I know the kids are going to tease me about it-”

“Hey,” Eddie interrupts, brows furrowed. “You’re plenty smart, Stevie, don’t listen to the little shitheads, alright? Whatever the answer is, whatever you decide to do, I’m with you. One hundred percent. I’ll even punish the little twerps during our next session if they say anything, okay?”

“Can you open it?” Steve begs, whispering, eyes wide.

Eddie’s hopeless to refuse. “Of course I can,” he replies, just as softly.

He looks at the envelope. Good, thick paper. Sticker return address. He opens it and pulls out a letter.

Dear Steven J. Harrington,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been chosen for 1988’s starting class! In Tricoci University, we pride ourselves on…

Eddie looks up at Steve with a grin. “You’re in.”

“Holy shit,” Steve breathes. “Holy shit!” He begins to grin. “I made it!”

“You made it!” Eddie celebrates, then keeps reading.

We hope you look forward to your time here at Tricoci University of Beauty Culture Bloomington.

Eddie looks up at Steve again. “A beauty school?”

Steve flushes scarlet. “Cosmetology. I wanna do hair.”

Eddie sits for a minute, thinking, before he grins at Steve and stands to sweep him into a spinning hug. “That sounds perfect for you!”

Steve giggles giddily, then grins happily at Eddie when he’s set down. “You really think so?”

“Think so? I know so! Stevie! This is gonna be so good for you!” He drags Steve over to the couch so they can both sit. “I mean, think about it. And I don’t just mean the obvious high school shit. Even the little things. You’re good with people, dude. They just like you just ‘cause you’re you. And who knows more about you than anyone else?”

Steve frowns. “Robin?”

Eddie chuckles. “My mistake. General you, not specific. Your hairdresser! You tell them everything. And you live for that shit, Stevie, I see how your eyes light up when the kids share gossip.” He grabs Steve’s hands and smiles warmly at him. “I promise, everyone’s gonna be so happy for you.”

“Thanks, Eds,” Steve murmurs, cheeks still pink.

“And hey,” Eddie says, grinning again. “You’ve got at least one lifelong customer.” He points to himself, grinning when Steve laughs.

“Thanks,” he says, then takes a deep breath, suddenly serious again. Eddie schools his face accordingly. “Will you help me tell Robin?”

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @mischivarien @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @muricel @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

Fic Taglist: @wonderland-girl143-blog

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #I’m terrible at titles someone help #essentially the plot is ‘Eddie is Steve’s hair dummy and they fall in love about it’ #happy ending #maybe some slight angst bc Dustin doesn’t think before he speaks #and also possibly miscommunication between our boys #because always. it always happens #starambles

[zu-is-here]

More dark kcrm (just two of them heh) for the birthday fruit @orange-dreamzer <3

#zu art #comic #dark kcrm #dark killercreammare #shattered dream #dream!sans #killer!sans #undertale #undertale au #utmv #ok no angst this time... but no fluff either >:D #I had way too many ideas but ended up finishing what I promised >;3 #hopefully you like it! (๑>◡<๑) #*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･''･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･* #Killer: *flirts when he wants to impress someone* | S!Dream: *flirts when he's about to strangle someone* xd #Dream wants some info but ​Killer is a tough nut to crack ;) #our goopy boi is almost at his limits but he doesn't want to break his favorite toy (//ú3ù//) #ok good morning everyone <3 *falls asleep*

[marvel-starwarsfangirl]

Watching "Bad Territory" and "Paths Unknown" from a mental health perspective really dials up the angst. It's so obvious that the Batch all really need therapy and it's sad to see them all struggle. So much has changed over the past year for them and by season 3, the cracks really show more than ever. Because they're so used to the solider life, pretty much all of them, particularly Crosshair, internalizes their pain to the point of self-destruction. They don't want to talk about it and it affects all of them.

Hunter's inability to keep his squad together after Order 66 happens takes a big toll on him. He directs all his energy at Omega and losing her in season 2 really pushes him over the edge. Instead of talking about it, he begins to act more recklessly. Hunter also has to deal with seeing Crosshair get turned against him and choose that at the end of season 1. There's also a lot of guilt he probably feels about leaving Cross and seeing the Batch's numbers dwindle. Going back to Omega, she probably gave him something to hold on to. She gives him a purpose despite all the guilt and pain he feels.

Crosshair is the most sensitive of the Batch in my opinion. He internalizes a lot and holds on to it. He lets it fester and I think he does so much more Hunter. Omega is the only person he feels comfortable enough to be truly vulnerable around. He has his moments with Hunter, but it's not on the same level as Omega. But even with her, he's so haunted by what happened to him that he doesn't want to talk about it. He also deflects a lot, putting himself down or lashes out to protect himself. One of the reasons why I loved the meditation sequence is because he slowly begins to find peace of mind. That's really going to help him when he eventually opens up.

Wrecker had to become more mature and the voice of reason for Hunter. While he has his jokey moments, he's much quieter and reserved. He knows he has to be strong for Hunter, just like Omega is for Crosshair. There's something sad to see the most jolly and upbeat characters become more quiet and serious. It shows just how dark things have become.

Speaking of Omega, she's not ok. Between her past and whatever else she went through on Tantiss, there is a lot going on in that little head of hers. She feels guilty for leaving the other clones behind and she went through/saw some very bad stuff. However, she's neglecting her own mental needs for two reasons in my opinion. #1: she's trying to not worry her brothers. She knows her absence affected them. I can imagine she doesn't want to feel guilty about putting more stress on them. #2: she's trying to be strong for Crosshair. Crosshair is the most outward with his mental struggles because it manifests as psychosomatic tremors. That and he pretty much lost all hope after being imprisoned. Omega selflessly puts her own needs aside to be there for him because she knows he's hurting more than he says he is. But how long will keeping up a brave face last for our little sunshine?

I really think "Identity Crisis" will force many of these characters like Cross or Omega to finally open up. They can't hide it forever. Crosshair in particular will have to confront his trauma if he wants his hand to slowly heal. It's a long journey though.

If we compare the Batch in CW vs. TBB S3, it's crazy to think how much they've changed since then. They're all struggling deeply. However, they have each other for support and sometimes, that's the best place to start for healing.

#star wars #the bad batch #tbb crosshair #tbb hunter #tbb omega #tbb wrecker #tbb season 3 #the angst guys #its so painful #youre telling me that this all happened in like a year? #why do the showrunners wish to torment us? #i cant do this #please send our boys and sweet bean some extra hugs #they're not ok #and they need help

[annmarcus63]

Jaskier never imagined that there could be another Geralt out there, much less another universe with unique yet similar problems. Nor did he imagine that, inexplicably and suddenly, his heart would feel so hungry for someone he had barely met four weeks earlier. Sure, Jaskier tended to fall in love within hours with whoever caught his attention, be it man, elf, woman, dwarf.... Jaskier has always loved freely without worrying about the consequences. But this famine was different, one that wants to swallow everything in one gulp. One that yearns for BeardGeralt. For days he tried to convince himself that it was pure lust, then he tried to convince himself that it was some sort of defense mechanism. So many years in love with Geralt have weighed heavily on him, perhaps what he feels for BeardGeralt is a convenient way out for his treacherous heart. In reality he suspects that he is only trying to deceive himself, after all he is the one who knows his heart best and knows very well that what he feels is real. As real as falling in love with the alter ego of the one who is supposed to be half of your soul. Which makes you feel futilely guilty. And it's certainly not fair, having to deal with how good BeardGeralt is. He's certainly something out of this world, ha. Two witchers and a bard traveling are a very picturesque image. Having only one horse, they take turns riding but BeardGeralt always offers him his place by claiming to have a lot of energy. In the evenings BeardGeralt always makes sure to give Jaskier a larger portion of food. Every time Jaskier looks up, he finds him watching him with a certain satisfaction of one who enjoys caring. The problem is that Geralt notices these gestures and Jaskier feels like garbage when he notices that the witcher is not comfortable. The bard fears that Geralt thinks of himself as insufficient. But, on the other hand, it's nice to have someone looking out for him for a change, to have someone make him feel loved.  

"Cold?" asks BeardGeralt one night of heavy rain when the three of them have taken shelter against the wall of some abandoned ruins. 

"I've been worse" and then he feels a hand running across his lower back and resting on his hip. Her breath catches. With a swift movement BeardGeralt brings him against his shoulder. Jaskier smiles sincerely pleased and looks at BeardGeralt out of the corner of his eye. Geralt, his Geralt tenses at his side, clearly not knowing what to make of the situation. He’s confused, but he knows he has no right to question Jaskier's relationships. He never has, but somehow this time feels different. It’s strange, Jaskier can admit that. But it feels right, Jaskier thinks guiltily. 

Jaskier has stolen a familiar-looking collection of poems from a rather rude merchant, to discover that it was an elvish collection of poems that her nanny used to read to him. He tells this story, as is his custom, in great detail. BeardGeralt listens intently and jokes playfully about his nostalgia. At some point in the conversation Geralt interferes to tell them that they should sleep. 

One evening Jaskier is tending his lute while Geralt prepares the fire while BeardGeralt is out hunting for food. 

"He will leave, Jask. You should be careful," Geralt advises him, almost whispering. At first Jaskier has a hard time understanding what they are talking about, but once he does a series of emotions run through the pit of his stomach. Sadness, anger, indignation, gratitude, sympathy and finally resignation. Jaskier is no friend of resignation.  

"I know." answers Jaskier with the certainty of one who knows he will lose something he did not know he possessed.  

So what if fate is right? So what if Geralt is his soulmate but they have met many years before? So what if his Geralt is not ready? So what if BeardGeralt is ready and more than willing to try something with him? So what if fate made a mistake? So what if BeardGeralt is here for a reason? So what if none of that matters because in the end, no matter what, Jaskier is going to get hurt? 

Kaer Morhen is getting closer every day, there BeardGeralt's Ciri will be waiting for them.

One thing Jaskier knows with futile certainty is that no Geralt would choose him.

-------------

Game Geralt x series Jaskier

Here's the first part

Thanks to fandom-trash-and-hyperfixations for their awesome ideas on this. love u.

What do you mean? of course there will be a culmination of this trashy angst/romance so stay tuned!

#geraskier #jaskier #geralt of rivia #the witcher #the witcher netflix #the witcher 3 #i just love some good angst u know #the thing is that Jaskier deserves happines with his soulmate #our boy needs to be happy so we can be happy #let me know what u think #what will be the better outcome for you

[captain-cold-approved]

im past 10k words in my 5 + 1 coldflash fic. i'm only done with the first two out of six scenarios. it's going SWELL.

#writing fanfic is a labor of love #and boy is it feeling laborous #but i will finish writing this so help me god #i haven't finished writing any of my fics longer than 5k recently #so i really need this one to work out #i would like to have some semi recent finished fics on my ao3 #bc rn it's lacking #there are quite a few one shots of >1k fics #but i need some solid 8k+ works too #anyways #coldflash #captain cold #the flash #barry allen #the flash cw #fanfic #ao3 #archive of our own #leonard snart #this 5+1 is going to be big fluff x angst vibes #with lots of bodily injuries #len boutta get FUCKED up

[sweetpapercroissant]

yes everybody loves samdean fucking all rough and brutal in the cover of darkness, never acknowledging this thing between them or even that it means anything but you know what’s also good? samdean going slow and taking their time, letting themselves be soft with and accepting that softness from each other. they’d die before they called it making love but. just them being comfortable and secure in the knowledge of their love and letting it show.

#tbf i would also die before i called it that #there’d still be some angst because they wouldn’t be our boys if they weren’t #supernatural #sam and dean #wincest #.txt

[taintedcigs]

okay quick question!

#its a battle of our boys… i just need to write some quick smutttttttt #and maybe throw some angst in there for a good measure #yk #polls

[blutopaz15]

the fact that we’re going to get to see High Mage Callum in all his glory TOMORROW y’all

#🤩🤩🤩 #I am SO excited to see bby boy pop off honestly #like yes bby do some magic #have some angst #yell at your friends and family even!! #we stan!!! #the dragon prince #callum #rayllum #our handsome high mage dork 💙💙💙

[foolsocracy]

Ough okay but, I doubt he'd be in the social circles that would lead to him ever knowing any of the rest of The Gang(tm) outside of the Everything Is Fine AU. Unless. Goblin worked with JJJ and Ben Urich, yeah? He for whatever reason decides to start prepping his son in case he inherits the business, takes him around the city on daily routines, and runs into Peter.

Oh for sure there is no way the gang and Harry could run into each other just w the way they are. Totallly different circles.

I’m not 100% sure about this, but i don’t think the Goblin ever actually worked w JJJ beyond like kidnapping him lmfao. It was all a ploy to kill Urich who’d gone rouge. But tbh that doesn’t even really distract from ur point cause it doesn’t really matter too much. Normans got tabs on everyone and I can see him just showing up wherever Urich is (who has Peter in tow) as an intimidation tactic. And if Norman’s showing Harry the ropes then there’s no reason why he can’t be there too.

There’s a few ways they can meet if we want to get creative w it. Robbie canonically does exposé work. I don’t think it would take much convincing to get him to go after a few leads on Norman Osborn, leads which maybe have him getting information from Osborns only son? And of course Peters not going to let Robbie go in there on his own, not with what he knows.

There’s a ton of ways we can swing it

#tbh we just keep creating offshoots of aus LMFAOO because w out the Everything is Fine AU there isn’t even a gang 😭😭😭😭😭 #we’ve created our own canon where Mj Pete and Robbie hang out together and that’s okay #we have everything is fine au and then the everything is decent au #where the gang exists but w angst and not everyone fits together okay #bless #this would be easier if I knew what to actually do w Harry #I’ve seen some crazy stuff #one fic had him literally put in a medically induced coma cause he was gay #which I think actually was a thing that happened but boy was it a shocker to read #asks #anon #thank uuuuu

[sunshineboylix]

"Hyunjin?" Felix felt like he'd checked every door in this hotel, and still no sign of his friend. He was doing his best not to panic, but seeing Yeonjun hurl such terrible accusations at Yunho had to have been triggering for his member. So much of what was said mirrored what Hyunjin told him of his own relationship with Yeonjun, and if it were Felix in this situation, he'd probably be crying in a corner somewhere.

Finally, one door opened to reveal the man he was looking for. Clearly, he'd been crying and didn't show signs of stopping. Felix's heart broke at the sight of him. "Hyunjin." He carefully knelt before his friend, trying to gauge the situation. "Is it okay if I touch you, or do you need space?"

@hwahyunjin

#sneak-attacking you with some soft angst for our boys <3

[second-hand-heaven]

bellhands shippers I'm sorry but I need to borrow your boy Sam and put him in situations for Izzy Angst purposes

unfortunately I cannot return him in one piece, do you take cash or card instead?

#writing drama #is this related to yesterday's angst #maybe #our boy izzy is going through it and im having the time of my life (while sobbing) #side note is that i love what y'all have done w Sam Bellamy #love what youve done with the place #im gonna make some shit up and hurt some made up people though!

[punkinspice]

Rise of the TMNT movie spoilers!!!

...

Ok so, unfortunately before I watched the movie, I had been spoiled about Leo sacrificing himself at the end into the prison dimension with the Kraang, and I knew nothing else, BUT I LEGIT THOUGHT, THAT THE MOVIE WAS GOING TO END WITH LEO STUCK IN THE PRISON DIMENSION AND THAT SEASON 3 WAS GONNA INVOLVE THE OTHER BROTHERS DESPERATELY TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET HIM OUT

and as we all know that didn't end up happening, but it did get me to thinking....

what if that did happen??? How exactly would things play out if that were the case? (I'm basically writing a fanfic at this point omg)

I think I would have Casey stay there and act as a temporary place holder for Leo so they could still be a team of 4, but I feel it would probably be a weird and awkward situation for them all

I think it could set up for each of the brothers to have really cool character arcs, like for Mikey what if instead of him being able to immediately access his great Mystic Powers like at the end of the movie, this hypothetical Season 3 would involve him learning how to access and summon them, discover where they come from and in the process learn how to become more confident in himself and independent and take on maybe more leadership roles? idk

for Donnie, it could be very interesting if it focused on him trying to work through his grief of the fact that he doesn't know if he's really lost a brother or not, but using his technology to cope and diving so deep into trying to solve the mysteries of time continuums and alternate dimensions and probably subconsciously beating himself up of the fact that he wasn't able to create something that could have prevented what happened to Leo, and trying to cope with everything that's been going on.

and for Raph, you could go into the more traditional loner, grumpy role he's had in the past, but in this context it's him wanting to go alone so that he won't endanger his brothers/family, because look what happened last time! He lost a brother to the prison dimension! In doing this he would end up pushing everyone he loves so dearly thinking he's protecting them but not realizing how much it's really hurting them in the process. That could be an interesting point for Mikey to possibly take on a leadership role? (idk)

AND FOR LEO, you could have him trying to survive in the prison dimension, constantly being hunted by Kraang, who is probably going more and more insane and deranged by the day (if time is a thing in that dimension) completely stunned that he was actually beaten, and then in his own way, with secondhand knowledge from Donnie, Leo's trying to figure out a way to breakthrough this dimension using what ever he can find, trying to at least send a message to his brothers that he's still alive!

And then of course at the end they manage to break through and there's a huge family reunion its all emotional and they all get new cool powers and upgrades and look all badass and fight off Kraang once and for all!!

Idk man, there's still a lot of details I would need to figure out here, especially Splinter and April, but there's soooooo much yet that can be done and explored with this series and I'm so sad that it was taken away from us to soon. I've literally barely watched anything else thats tmnt related before Rise, and gosh I love this series so much.

#rise of the tmnt #rise of the tmnt movie #rottmnt movie #hi im new here #we love our turtle boys #just some ideas i had that i needed to get out #cause #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #THE ANGST BRO

[roguesenses]

[ ☘ ] starter for @ignitionxbomb​

He couldn’t remember who had suggested it, or how they managed to get everyone to sit down to play this game, even those who’d typically avoid these group bonding moments. So far, the best performance had come from Kaminari, who had diligently performed a dance imitating a crab. Izuku laughed until his stomach hurt and gave his classmate a loud round of applause. 

Soon, it was his turn to ask. 

Izuku turned to the person next to him with a cheerful smile, and then he realized who it was.  “K-Kacchan!”

Death was upon him - Izuku could smell it in the air. 

If Kacchan chose truth and he accidently asked something he shouldn’t, he’ll die. But if the other chose dare and he asked for something unreasonable he would also die! What would he even ask him to do? Surely Kacchan wouldn’t agree to something like dancing or singing. He could ask the guy to drop and give him 20, but when Todoroki used that earlier for a dare, everyone seemed very disappointed and called it lame. 

This was stressful, and he may or may not have been muttering his thoughts out loud. The good thing was he used a quiet voice, so people didn’t seem to understand what he was rambling on about. Unfortunately, that still meant he had accidentally drawn attention to himself and everyone was looking. 

“Uh...Uhhhh, right! Truth or dare?” Time to find his courage, plus ultra. 

#DEKU IN 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 #𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 ↷ BAKUGO #I sat down to write something angsty then I realized my boy's been angsting for three posts already #He needs some cheering up and who to do it better than our dear loving childhood bestie great explosion murder god dynamite