#shes a lesbian SHE IS but then i look back at what ive written and its like wow. theres smth wrong with you two

[variousqueerthings]

I note that I don't, and I never, was much of a fan of doctor-and-rose as romance, but that I -- rather than get annoyed at the romantic-coded scenes -- had a tendency to simply read them from a totally different perspective, and really maybe should have been a sign of sooomething different about me, that I continuously felt that the doctor's concepts of connection must be so alien, that to call it romance would be to diminish the actual Thing that they had, which was presented as such onscreen (to my mind then, now I realise what was happening, but I prefer what I had going on), which is basically that the doctor was a shell of a person, hurtling towards destruction (he would have died without rose in ep1), desperately lonely and sad and traumatised, and she retaught nine -- and by extension ten -- how to love the universe, at the same time as nine and ten taught her the same. (I think about the scene in father's day, where while they're arguing, rose says that she knows how sad he is, and he'll just hang around the tardis waiting for her -- she knew!)

and then on top of that with sarah-jane (which, I never watched the classics as a kid, so I didn't have that context for her beyond what the episode presented) it felt like that was sort of confirmed and made even more canon through this idea that the doctor is constantly mourning the inevitable deaths of their companions and would rather simply leave them behind at some point than watch that happen (and they've seen that happen before, although dying for a cause versus just... dying, because you die, while they don't, they just continue on and on, always seeking connection, always knowing that time will take them away, that's a whole other thing)

and then of course there's ten's... I would call it "sex appeal" because it's david tennant and with his performance there's immediately a bit of a focus on oh he's quite pretty and he faints/is knocked unconscious in both of his first episodes, and a lot more flirting, and the people want to see sparks or what have you... but the doctor as portrayed and written is still... not coming at it that way. yes yes girl in the fireplace but also, once again, doesn't work for me, because I find it soooo much more interesting that the doctor would imprint on A Life - and a life that they admire -- and speedrun the exact thing that they're most afraid of with their companions... that she ages and dies and it's the one thing that the doctor simply cannot stop

meanwhile rose is quite young and swept up in this whole massive adventure and very much reads the doctor not as an alien (frequently surprised by their alien-ness) and gets jealous of sarah-jane as if she's an ex, and renette as if she's... a replacement? but really it's more that the doctor met her at the point when she was about to accept her life as it was. not an exciting life, not a bad life, but always having to ignore the idea that there must be more to it than this. and the idea that she might be unceremoniously dumped back in that after seeing just how This the this could be, of course that's terrifying. and of course she's simultaneously taken with the dashing doctor and the jetset life, and worried she could be replaced, because to her the doctor saved her at 19 years old. in some ways the doctor created her (considering who she becomes after dooms day)

contrasted to martha who initially has a similar kind of experience, but the doctor doesn't meet her at the space she's in with them -- ten is leaning on her, like they did with rose, but not giving anything back unless kicking and screaming and traumatising her whole family. martha's trajectory is so so tragic, because she barely gets a taste of the splendor versus the horrors and the latter marks her for life. but she also knows to walk away from those overwhelming feelings, rather than give into them, she knows they'll never be rewarded and she also grows beyond wanting to be a crutch for the doctor (the fact that she then ends up as a soldier, well... ouch)

and then of course donna, who never has those fucking awe-feelings to begin with and whose connection with the doctor is explicitly de-romanticised but never placed on a lesser pedestal as if there's a hierarchy of alloromanticism. topples those pillars, never sees the doctor as anything but what the doctor is. good old donna. (sobs.) (but also... cautious hope for the specials.) (but also sobs.)

my point being. just don't buy alloromantic doctor, they're a near-immortal alien. it's such a dull simplistic way of reading their relationships to other beings. other point being. all those women who were making heart-eyes at ten, wish they'd met thirteen and had a... "yeah, this still works for me," moment. their horizons, too, are broadened by seeing More. (that or they realise they were never actually "in love" but just thought ten was a sexy skinny little snack and it blinded them.) (although jodie whittaker, too, is a snack.)

and lastly lastly ofc, is that if the doctor has a longterm (by doctor time measurement) intense relationship with anyone, whatever that might be called, it's the tardis. and that relationship is also so alien it cannot be quantified by human words for concepts

#im rewatching doctor who #doctor who #dw #aroace doctor #look im rewatching into 13 and beyond i am willing to entertain yaz and 13 because we enjoy a good bit of lesbianism #however will wait and see because the doctor in my head is so so aroace in every incarnation #they just manifest it in different ways #i could go into the whole eleven-and-river and how i feel about that #i am perhaps in the minority in that river's arc just doesn't work for me and often neither does her character #i kind of want to listen to the audio adventures because ive heard she's got much more to do there #than be a flirty enigma/sexy lady/moffat fantasy #but i can say that one of my least favourite things about moffat's run was how 'sexy' he tried to make everything #by literally just having people use the word sexy all the time and talk about bad girls and what have you #it's like sexiness as written by a straight teenage boy #and not a supposedly grown man writing for grown people #other minority opinion perhaps but eleven just isn't my cup of tea #am interested in how i'll feel going back into that run #dont like matt smith much dont like moffat much and dont like what they envisioned for the doctor and how they directed/acted the doctor #feel like capaldi had to claw the character back into some semblance of thematic coherency #i was never too much into especially ten getting a bit high and mighty with lonely god and the like titles BUT #waters of mars places that in a very particular context that makes it so so gooood #(another post for another day about companion opinions)

[mxdotpng]

i am constantly at war with myself. elio and mavis are NOT gay but they certainly do fucking act like it

#.text #yes she ended the world just to save his life but that isnt importsnt theyre not. you know. gestures #shes a lesbian SHE IS but then i look back at what ive written and its like wow. theres smth wrong with you two #and i am not changing it on account that she is a lesbian (real) and their relationship being platonic is very important to me. i love them #one day ill write my horrible romance that has ruined the narrative. but not today. #mavis is too busy stealing elios bestie. bc she is also gay. and they are both lesbians #a princess and her angry girlfriend who has an axe twice her size #real #elio vervaine

[yoimiyasthings]

Robin x Boothill

Smut!

CW - Bunny Suit, Lesbian Robin, Bi/Genderfluid T-Fem Boothill, Dildo's, Grinding, Edging, belt used as handcuffs, Aftercare!! Generally sappy in general and Fluffy ending.

SMUT WRITTEN BY MINOR

(Please bare in mind that this is my first fanfic 💫)

Robin stands in her shared room, waiting for her girlfriend to return home after a long mission.

Walking around leaving Rose petals and setting up red lights to set the mood.

While decorating she can't help but feel somthing stir, she felt damp. The latex wasn't helping.

Robin felt herself get wetter and wetter, perhaps seeing her reflection in the mirror, imagine if her fans knew this side of her? The newly playboy bunny Robin was ready for her girlfriend to return, perhaps a little to ready... She walks over to her vanity and strokes the corner, biting her lip.

She holds the sides and hovers her crotch over the corner, slowly lowering herself and as she felt a wave of pleasure she slowly started to grind away at it. It felt so good but she felt a twinge of guilt for not waiting... But it felt so good.

A few moans and whines escaped her mouth before she hears a voice behind her "is my little bunny so desperate?" and before turning around she felt to cold metal hands cup her breasts and the familiar shark teeth bite her neck.

"Darling... You scared me.. Mmh!" as she begins to speak, a bite sinks into her neck.

"Ah ah~ Good bunnies don't talk until asked to. Got it?"

Boot kisses Robins newly bitten neck and scoops her off the vanity.

"I can do everything and more... So impatient.."

Robin feels her stomach flip and her wings flutter, Boot notices.

"you can talk for now.. What one do you want honey.. Bull or Stallion?"

"Can you use bull today love...?"

"anything for my little bunny"

Boot kisses Robins cheek and applies fresh lipstick, ready to mark her ladies skin all night.

"You look radient tonight my love... It might just be the suit... But I always think you're this beautiful..."

Robin gasps as she feels a finger on the latex crotch of her suit and a soft vibration coming from it.

She whines at the feeling, trying to get closer to the vibration, but Boot holds her arms above her head

"Now little bunny... Hold still for me.. "

As Robin nods, Boot unbuckles her belt an wraps it around Robins hands, restraining her.

Robin giggles at the nickname, growing damper by the second.

"Since I've been away for so long... And you've obviously missed me.. I'll be generous tonight"

Whith this, Boot begins to unzip her lovers suit, slowly revealing her breasts and stomach, but she stops just before her crotch.

Leaving down and popping her lips, Boot begins to kiss Robins chest, letting her whine as she nibbles, leaving marks where ever she pleases.

"So beautiful... I suppose you can talk now.. You've been so good for me.."

"Thank you dear... I've missed you so much..ive been so-"

Boot stops her, kissing her and unzipping the final stretch of zip.

"I expect you to sing to me tonight my dove.. Can you do that for me?"

"Y-yes Hilly.."

Boot smiles softly at the nickname as she pops a finger off her hand and putting it on Robin's clit on a low vibration. This got a good, sweet moan out of her, all Boot could ever ask for is her girlfriends satisfaction.

As the finger stimulates Robin's pussy, she bucks her hips trying to get more friction. Seeing this Boot puts the streanth up a few notches. And lord, if Robin's moans were a song, Boot would listen to it all day..

She leans down to Robins eye level, stroking her red face.

"Such a good girl... Just like that.."

Seeing as Robin has been so good, Boot decides to let her go from the belt. As the belt comes apart, Robin wraps her arms around her lovers neck, pulling her down and kissing her passionately but softly none the less.

Moaning into Boots mouth, she feels the finger slide down into her pussy.

"prepare yourself my dear.."

With another kiss, Robin feels the finger attach itself back to Boots hand, and another finger enter. Two vibrating fingers going at a strong pace.

"Ah~ Hilly! S-so strong..!"

Boot unlatched from Robins reddening neck and looks at her moaning face and then down at her gushing pussy. Giggling, she pushes the vibrations even harder, Robin tearing up at this point cries, "Please! Please, I'm gonna cum Hilly!"

At these words, Boot pulls her fingers out, a smug look on her face as Robins hips buck upwards to chase them, but only to be met by the knot in her stomach aching. Longing to be filled.

"Hilly! You're so mean.." Robin pouts as Boot looks at her, "Now now... You don't even know why I pulled out.. Here.."

Boot grabs her strap and alligns it to Robins throbbing pussy.

"Please Hilly..." Robin pleads as she looks at Boots length beneath her

"What good manners lovely.." Boot says as she pushes in slowly, using the wetness of Robin for lube.

Robin grabs onto her lovers shoulders as she feels the cold metal enter her.

And as Boot finishes filing her up with her length, Robin lays letting out a satisfied, guteral moan.

As Boot waits for the signal to start moving, Robin smiles and starts to giggle, covering her mouth and laughing more and more.

"I'm sorry hilly! I just can't take you seriously right now!" and as Boot hears these words, she stars to blush and laugh with Robin, looking at her now, it's almost like she lit up the room

"Just tell me when Darlin'..." She smirks as she picks up the Polaroid camera on the bedside table.

As Robin sees the camera, she tries to cover her face but fails to hide her smile as the camera clicks.

Boot puts the photo and camera down so it can develop as she helps her Dove finish.

"I love you so much Robin... So so much.."

Robin can't help but whine at this comment, letting out a faint "I love you too~"

Robin holds Boots face close as they kiss, and as Robins climax approached, she separates the kiss and places her forehead on the others. Moaning like it was their last time together, she feels at the highest point of the night

"Please Hilly... Please..!"

"Anything for my sweet dove.." Boot whispers back

"Come for me angel.." and as if they were magic words, the knot in Robins had come undone.

Boot waits for Robins climax to wash over, staying by her side until it's alright to go set up for the rest of the night.

Robin pants as she holds her arms around Boots neck, forehead pressed to her loves still.

She flops back, laying down on the bed and Boot takes that as her signal. Kissing Robins cheek, she gets up and runs down to the kitchen to grab her a bottle of water and some snacks.

Sneaking around Sunday (unsuccessfully) she runs back upstairs and sits beside a worn out Robin, although she looked more like an Angel, practically glowing.

Robin takes the water and gulps it down. Rolling over to sling her arms around Boots hips.

"Welcome home.."

Boot chuckles as she puts her jacket over a practically naked Robin. "I'll run the bath deary.."

Robin dozes off, staring at a starry Penacony through the window, thinking about how she now knew that this was how life was going to be, and she's happy.

After a bath cleaning her up, Boot helps to dry her body and hair, kissing every mark left and being very gentle with every move, as if Robin was made of China.

Boothill sits on the toilet as Robin stands in front of her, Boot puts her hands on Robins hips, just at her eye level and Robin runs her hands through Boots hair. No words where exchanged, but the look they shared could speak millions.

#robin #robin hsr #Boothill #boothill hsr #Smut #hsr smut #honkai star rail smut #Lesbians #Yuri activities #Yuri #Lesbian #genderfluid #Hoyoverse #wlw #wlw smut #wlw nsft #Robinhill #BinHill #Hillbin #save a horse ride a cowboy

[ecstasyhighway]

YOU & I | an ellie williams fanfic series

this is a fic that will be posted and mostly updated on wattpad @ecstasyhighway this ff is heavily based off of you the netflix show and inspired by a ff on here which i cannot remember who wrote it but if yk lmk so i can give proper credit.

there is not smut in this little part here but its a filthy ah fic that will become darker as it goes on.

MEN DNI - 16+ i fear (im 17 so if u feel uncomfortable reading from a minor who will be 18 at the end of the year then u dont have to read this i really dgaf.)

ch 1 ch 2

silly story and more ff info under the cut

Ellie had seen you walking around the music store she worked at... her attention automatically shifted from the customer in front of her to you. Your hair, your curves, your eyes. Everything about you was just...

"hello? did you hear me?" the woman raised her voice slightly to get her attention,

Ellie snapped out of her thoughts and focused on the clearly irritated woman in front of her.

"yea my bad, what was that..?"

The lady rolled her eyes and started asking questions about guitar lessons for her son or daughter or some shit, she wasnt really paying attention to the nonsense floating from her mouth.

"yeah, im not the one you go to about that, uhhh my buddy Jesse is in the back, he can help you"

"thanks" and with that, she headed towards the back, muttering words under her breath.

Ellie's attention quickly turned back towards you. She examines you closely. Watching you grab a vinyl from the shelf, Call Me If You Get Lost, is what you had grabbed. Ellie wants to walk over to you, and talk to you but shes scared. What if she says the wrong thing? What if she freaks you out? What if you think shes a weirdo.. She turns away to stop looking at you, her cheeks are red and shes shaking, she is just so nervous and she's not even planning on talking to you... She puts her face in her hands and begins to calm herself down.

"Hi! hello"

A voice chimes from behind her, she turns around and a lump forms in her throat.

Its... you.

———————————————————————————

YOU & I | ellie williams.

this is a DARK fanfic. Based heavily off of the show you on netflix and inspired by a fanfic I saw on tumblr. This story has adult themes, sexual themes, stalking, thoughts of killing (no actual killing just thoughts), themes of hate, ellie has slight mental issues (obv shes stalking) age gaps (only 3 years and they're adults). idgaf how old u are this is dark and you have been warned, i am not responsible for any type of reaction you may have to this as ive given you a warning. I will give warnings at the beginning of chapters that might be too dark. again you have been warned.

important - ellie might be a tad ooc, shy!ellie, switch!ellie if you squint. this is a lesbian ff.

MEN DNI I WILL FIND YOU.

reader is afab and 20

ellie is 23

modern au

jessie, dina, joel, tommy, maria, most of the main tlou cast is in this (not everyone will be mentioned or even really have a place in the story, just know they are present)

based in New York (obv)

i am not a professional writer, im simply a girl who writes shit when shes bored, do not expect me to have an upload schedule. I get drained v fast and i want to enjoy writing, its not a job with deadlines. so with that my grammar might be bad, spelling might be ass and if there is any math it will probably be wrong, it might be written in third, or first person i be fuckin up with that but yall will be fine.

YOU & I | ellie williams.

story created and written by @ecstasyhighway

tlou and the characters belongs to Neil Druckmann and Naughty Dog

the story of "YOU" belongs to Netflix

Story was ib by a ff i saw breifly but i don't remember who wrote it so, if yk pls lmk so i can give proper credit

THIS IS FICTION. DO NOT DO THIS SHIT IRL BRUH ITS ACTUALLY WEIRD ASF. AGAIN THIS IS PURELY FICTIONAL. thank yew

uhhhh yeah enjoy ig and i do appreciate any supportive criticism as i am not a professional writer and shit could just be wrong.

also im new to tumblr fanfic writing so yeah 😭.

#ellie williams #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie x fem reader #ellie smut #ellie x you #fanfic #ellie is so hot #i need her so fucking bad #lesbian #ellie williams smut #ellie williams series #new to tumblr

[absinthe-adonis]

lucien flavius x reader

warnings: pwp, blowjobs, finger sucking, mild choking, jerking off, dom!reader, sub!lucien, orgasm denial, begging

author’s note: ive never sucked a dick before unfortunately so i apologize if this is written weird. as always feedback and requests are very welcome!! i still have a nagging feeling that there are some weird clunky sentences and mistakes and/or i overused some words too much even though ive read this over three times now and sent it to two different people to read so i also apologize about that. however one of those people was a lesbian and she said “the fact that it kept me interested is extremely impressive”

“Why don’t we work on your training, Lucien?” As much as you wished he’d let you train him on more than one thing a day, you had to admit at least the days seemed to fly past when you were with him.

He looks up from the enchanting table, his face lighting up. “Really? Oh, I’ve been looking forward to this. What shall we work on this time?”

“Well.” You smile wryly. “Don’t take this personally, but I was thinking we should build up your stamina.”

His face pales dramatically. “Oh dear. You’re going to make me exercise, aren’t you?”

“Come on, come on, outside. You want to be able to hold your own in a fight for longer, don’t you?”

He groans, dragging himself dramatically toward the door. “I suppose so.”

You roll your eyes and walk out to the sprawling, vibrant yard of Tundra Homestead. Despite his complaints, Lucien is close behind you, as always.

“We can start easy,” you say, fighting back laughter at the look of dread he’s giving you. “15 push-ups. Make sure you count them.”

“Easy?! You overestimate me.” Resentfully, he lowers himself to the ground in the most dignified way he can and begins his set of very undignified push-ups. You fold your arms and watch him amusedly.

“One… two… three… f-four…” His strained, breathy voice gives you butterflies — and not in your stomach. To make matters worse, Lucien lets out a soft, broken moan as he reaches the sixth push-up. You tighten your grip on your arms, trying with all your might not to react visibly (or audibly).

His body shakes as he struggles to raise himself up and down, breathing heavily. You imagine what he would look like, unclothed and trembling beneath you, completely at your mercy-

You clasp your hand over your mouth, horrified at your own thoughts. Holy shit, this is so bad, he’s just your traveling companion, he probably doesn’t even-

Your train of thought is interrupted by Lucien exhaling loudly and collapsing on the ground. He looks up at you with forlorn puppy eyes. “Can that please be it for today?”

You nod stiffly. “Uh- yep. That’s fine. I’m gonna- I- I’m gonna- I’ll be right back.” You turn around and practically stumble back into the house.

You sit down on the side of your bed and stare at the wall, mind and heart racing. The attraction itself wasn’t even that bad- it had always sort of been there, ever since your first meeting when you asked if he was flirting and he got all flustered. It was cute. He was cute. But now, he’s hot, which is a completely and vastly different beast to deal with. And really, it’s the implications of the attraction that have you so frazzled. Also, how did such a short and simple thing drive you so insane with lust? Where did all of this come from? What if you accidentally change the way you treat him and then he feels bad or he starts treating you differently back?

The wooden rapping of knuckles against wood breaks through the deafening silence. Lucien poked his head through the door nervously. “Is- is everything all right?”

Gods motherfucking damn it. “Yeah, it’s okay, Luce. I dunno.”

“Were my push-ups really that bad?” He asks, the slight lilt in his voice and his concerned smile clearing the cloud in your mind a bit. You chuckle.

“Can I come in?”

You nod and pat the bed next to you. He sits, his knees tilted in towards you. “Do you, er… want to talk about anything?”

“I want you,” you blurt out. Lucien stares at you, mouth open.

“I’m sorry,” you choke out, quickly standing up. “I shouldn’t have- oh my god, I’m so stupid, I’m sorry. You-”

You stop as he grabs your wrist, not pulling you back but not letting you leave either. “Do you mean, like-”

“Yes.”

He lets go of you, putting his fingertips to his lips. A deep coral hue floods across his cheeks. “Oh! Well. That’s- certainly something!”

“Look, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything- I especially shouldn’t have said it like that- if you’re disgusted and want me to leave, you can just say that, I won’t-”

He gives you an incredulous look. “What? No! No, that’s not what I meant at all! I’m not- I mean, I’m not… opposed??”

Your brain seems to have shut off. “You… really?

“Well, I wouldn’t lie to you!” He says defensively. “Especially not about this, that would be cruel!”

A fiery sensation begins to burn in the pit of your stomach. “Lucien.” There’s a new deep, sultry quality to your voice, sending visible shivers down his spine. He looks at you, silently, expectantly.

“Would you want to? Right now?”

He swallows. “I suppose I wouldn’t-”

You don’t even allow him to finish his sentence before you push him down onto the bed, climbing on top of him. He gasps quietly, almost paralyzed.

You straddle him, placing one hand on his waist and leaning down to run the other through his soft blond hair. “Relax,” you purr into his ear. “You can tell me to stop at any time.” You move your hand down to palm the growing bulge in his pants. He lets out a soft whimper, and the fire in your stomach begins to burn brighter. “Fuck,” you whisper. “You’re so pretty.” You move your hand back to his waist and start grinding against him, eliciting more muffled moans from his closed mouth. You run your thumb across his lips. “You like this?”

He nods fervently. “Yes- gods, that feels- really good-” His high, whiny voice is like a divine symphony. Your hands travel slowly down his sides until you slip your thumbs under the waistband of his pants, causing him to stir in anticipation. You drag them down his slim, downy legs, and slide yourself back onto your knees. He whines at the absence of stimulation.

“Sit up, Lucien.”

He inhales sharply and slowly props himself up with his arms, which you can see are shaking with nervousness and excitement.

“Now take your shirt off.”

He nods and eagerly pulls it over his head, tossing it to the side. You allow your gaze to indulgently explore his exposed body. “Look at you,” you breathe softly. “So obedient for me.” He closes his eyes and tilts his head back, whining again and rolling his hips forward. You reach out and hook your fingers onto his loincloth, slowly and agonizingly pulling it down to reveal his rapidly hardening cock, dripping with precum.

“Hmm,” you hum appreciatively. “Already so wet. You want me to suck your dick, Lucien?”

“Yes,” he says in a quiet, choked voice.

“Oh, you’re gonna have to do better than that, Luce. I want you to beg for me. I want you to show me that you want me as much as I want you.”

“Please,” he mewls. “Please, please, I need you- I n-need you, please make me feel good, please-” His words dissolve into incoherence as you grasp onto his thighs, your fingers sinking into his plush skin, pushing his legs further apart. He lets out high, shuddering moans as you put your lips against his cock, swirling your tongue languidly around his tip. “Fuck- oh my gods- aah-”

You continue to suck teasingly at his tip, thoroughly enjoying his taste, the heat of his skin, the high desperation of the noises he’s making. You can feel him squirming, and you can see his hands grabbing fistfuls of the sheets in the corners of your vision.

“Please,” Lucien moans. “I need more- more, please-”

You laugh softly, the vibration of the sound making him sigh wantonly. You move your head down his shaft, sucking and caressing him with your mouth and tongue. His hips buck up involuntarily, his long cock hitting the back of your throat. “Ah- sorry- fuck. It feels- so good- so good-”

You smile and reach up, grabbing his wrist and placing his hand on the back of your head. His fingers immediately lace through your hair, holding firmly onto you. “Oh my gods,” he groans, and starts slowly pushing your head up and down. You relish in his pleasure, in how perfectly his dick seems to fit in your mouth. You shift your hands to his hips, and he whines loudly, thrusting forward.

You can tell he’s holding back, trying to keep his composure. You wish you could tell him it’s okay, he can let go, but you don’t want to stop. His cock is absolutely intoxicating, and you need more of it. You want to make him completely unravel. You increase your pace, bobbing your head up and down, and using your grip on his hips to pull him closer to you, farther down your throat. He cries out your name, and you can feel him quivering beneath you. Yes. Fuck. Oh my gods. Your hands curl into claws, your nails scratching at him in blind desire. His yelps and moans only make you more and more insatiable.

But suddenly, you have an idea that makes an evil smile spread across your face. As wonderful as it would be to swallow every last drop of his cum, you want to see him. You continue to suck on him, rapidly and passionately, coaxing him towards his orgasm-

-And then, you pull back. He practically screams in agony, thrusting hopelessly into the air. You look up at his face; his eyes squeezed shut, his mouth wide open, his features twisted together in pleasure and pain. “N-no,” he gasps out. It takes every ounce of willpower in your body not to pounce on him and finish him off right there.

He opens his eyes and looks down at you pitifully, panting and twitching, leaning back on his hands. “Please, please, keep going, please-”

You climb up on top of him and then swing around, pressing yourself against his sweat-slicked back and putting your lips against his ear.

“I’m going to help you jerk off that pretty cock of yours, and you are not going to cum until I say you can.”

He whimpers quietly, and you reach forward and place your hand on his, guiding it to his throbbing dick. He wraps his fingers needily around it, and you did the same between his. He starts moving his fist up and down, but you tighten your grip and force him to slow down, to which he lets out a heavy, drawn-out moan. You splay your free hand across his smooth chest, stroking his skin, slowly traveling upward until you clasp it around his throat.

Lucien lets out a depraved keening sound, his own free hand shooting backward and finding your thigh, then clutching onto it for dear life. You look at the hopeless expression on his face, completely lost in pleasure. “That’s my good boy,” you croon in his ear, earning yourself another sweetly strangled moan.

“Please,” he stammers out, hardly able to speak. “Please let me cum, please, I want to cum, please, I need it so bad-”

“Mmm, not yet, Luci.” He groans in pain, both at your response and as you remove your hand from his. “Don’t stop, now. Keep the same pace. Be a good boy.”

“I will, I will- I’ll be such a good boy for you, please, plea-” You cut him off by shoving two fingers into his mouth, essentially having him in a headlock now. “Suck.”

He moans again around your fingers, and does as you ask. Your entire body feels as if it might burn to a crisp at any moment, seeing the pleasure he’s in because of you. He can barely concentrate on jerking off and sucking your fingers at the same time. The beautiful noises he’s making are steadily amping up in volume and desperation, and he’s becoming sloppier and shakier the more his restraint fades into utter ecstasy.

You push your fingers further into his mouth. “Does my pretty boy want to cum?” You ask sweetly. He nods and whines in response.

“Cum for me, Lucien. Show me how good you feel.” You clamp your legs on either side of his torso, spreading your fingers out in his mouth, squeezing his throat in encouragement. In a few seconds, hot streams of cum burst out of his dick, covering his hand, his legs, his stomach, the sheets, even the floor. You press hard, passionate kisses against his shoulder, cheek, and neck, everywhere you can reach, as tremors rack his body and his moans reach a heavenly climactic chorus. He calls out your name, over and over, pushing himself into you as he orgasms.

Finally, he goes limp, breathing like he had just run a marathon. You let yourself relax in the blissful intimacy of this moment, before peeling yourself off of him and gently lowering him down onto the bed, pressing a final kiss to his lips. “You’re perfect, Lucien. You did so good.”

“You,” he answered breathlessly. “You’re amazing.”

You cup his cheek in your hand. “Let’s get you cleaned up, hmm?”

The you spend the next few minutes cleaning the mess off of him and his surroundings with rags from your bedside table, while he apologizes profusely no matter how many times you assure him it’s okay (and you actually think it’s very hot). He still doesn’t seem to have complete control of his motor skills back yet.

What a man. You already can’t wait for the next time you get to rail him senseless.

#cross-posted to ao3 #skyrim x reader #skyrim smut #skyrim #skyrim fanfiction #skyrim custom followers #lucien flavius #lucien flavius x reader #fun fact the aforementioned lesbian friend actually accidentally opened this as a document on her school account #she was called down to the office and the counselor said i have a career in writing

[bipirate]

favourite things: 2023 edition

last year i made one of these and i thought it'd be fun to make another one. i have a notion spreadsheet with all the media i watch/read/play throughout the year (not just things that came out this year!) and i give them ratings. these are the highs (and some of the lows) of 2023 (not in order).

Games

Tunic - such a great and beautiful game that i do not want to spoil. seriously, play it. if you like zelda, exploration, solving puzzles, and cute little foxes, then it's a must

Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom - what can i say, i love a zelda

Portal 2 - just an even more excellent sequel to an excellent game

TV

Alice in Borderland - i didn't know what to expect at first but it was excellent and highly addictive

Not Me - my introduction to thai BL (for better and also definitely for worse lol). anyway this show changed my brain chemistry. it has everything: gays, a twin switch situation, leftism, arson, rooftop kiss... you know

Bad Buddy - speaking of rooftop kisses...... if you know you know. anyway this is also a thai BL and it's still rotating in my brain. i rewatched it almost immediately, that's how good it was

The King's Affection - cheesy historical kdrama about a crown prince who is secretly a woman, with a swoon-worthy romance and political intrigue. this one's for the bisexuals (after all, the male love interest falls in love with the prince before he finds out it's a woman)

Vinland Saga - this anime fucking wrecked me. season 2 had me crying every single episode. thorfinn is my new child and i WILL name my future cat after him

The Devil Judge - a kdrama about a dystopian south korea with a fucked up justice system. anyway kang yohan character of all time. oh and also toxic homosexuality (affectionate)

Books

The Poppy War trilogy by R. F. Kuang - what an excellent series to get me back into fantasy series. it was not without faults, but i was hooked anyway

Babel by R. F. Kuang - i read this brick in 5 days straight. it's beautifully written and has such interesting things to say about language and colonialism. again, it has flaws but i wasn't bothered, i was obsessed with this book

The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon - i didn't realise how much i missed high fantasy until i read this. it has lesbians, dragons, a bitter old homosexual, magic, and did i mention dragons and lesbians?

He Who Drowned the World by Shelley Parker Chan - the sequel to She Who Became the Sun, my favourite book of last year. this sequel fucking DELIVERED. i went insane about it multiple times. it's a must read

Graphic novels/manga

Witch Hat Atelier by Kamome Shirahama - i started this manga 2 years ago, but since it's still ongoing and I've read new chapters this year, it counts for this year as well

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Steel Ball Run by Hirohiko Araki - not finished with it yet but it is truly as good as everyone says it is

The Adventure Zone: The Eleventh Hour by the McElroys and Carey Pietsch - i know not everyone likes the taz comics, but i do, i think theyre great adaptations, and this one looked incredible

Movies

Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse - not as good as the first one, but still really good. beautifully animated and extremely entertaining

Bonus: the lowest of the low, titles that earned my 'sucked shit' rating

Theory of Love - amazing that out of the 3 thai BLs ive watched, 2 managed to make it on my favourites list, and one of them was some of the worst television i've ever seen

Where the Crawdads Sing - read the book for book club last year, we all hated it, and now we decided to watch the movie for a laugh. it also sucked

#special shoutout to boys planet (the kpop variety show) which i rated both 'bad' and 'good' at the same time. #i didnt actually watch many movies this year oops #if only interview w the vampire was available to watch in my country otherwise i'd have watched it already #and itd probably be on the list. next year i'll try to watch it somehow

[roseworth]

If you got to write an ongoing for Rose, what major arcs would you do? Would you have her ice Slade? Would she team up with Jason's Outsiders, end up with Tatsu or Babs, or be her own free agent occasionally punching other heroes?

oh my god yes. im just kinda gonna start dumping thoughts here with no organization im so sorry but here we go

so first of all i know i will never get this but my ideal rose ongoing would be her working mostly alone but sometimes teaming up with people bc she doesnt like to stay with anyone for long but she DOES work with other people when she needs them

shes been in gotham for a while so id prob keep her there and have her team up with other ppl in gotham every once in a while bc. i want her to. i just think gotham is a good place for her because it is a city of the most stubborn people in the world so she would fit right in

id prob have her do kind of the same thing she was up to in Fresh Hell and taking down various crime rings bc i dont really see her caring much about the costumed villains, not to mention there are a hundred other vigilantes in gotham for the Big Bads

also having her in gotham kind of opens up so many roads SO. gotham vigilante teamups <3 first things first i feel the need to say her and bruce would not have any need to interact and i dont think either of them would really want to fhdkjfhdsf like rose is trained and mostly doesnt kill people so i dont think batman would really care what shes doing until she does something bad, and rose wouldnt really like batman (for various reasons that i wont go into rn) so they would kinda just be doing their own thing

ANYWAYS in general i think that the idea of rose teaming up with bats is sooooo funny bc most of the bats are very meticulous planners and make whole schemes for everything they do. while 90% of the time roses plan is "im gonna go in and start punching people and see what happens" so i think she would give whoever shes working with an aneurysm and thats kind of hilarious to me

i want her to team up with steph and cass for homoerotic reasons because they all have so many narrative parallels, ESPECIALLY with cass so i need them to team up again <3 idk what they would be up to besides getting on each others nerves but i need it so bad

also rose & jason Now.. they r besties to me. i feel like they get into a lot of the same shit so they would also team up fairly often :) not to mention both of them have abandonment issues so they would have the most toxic friendship that constantly shifts between codependency and disappearing whenever something bad happens <3 besties<3333333

honorable mention teamups are babs who im pretty sure ive already talked about a babs&rose teamup before so i wont go into it, helena who i honestly have only read in bop so idk a lot about her but from what i do know i think she and rose would get along, harley who i would only want her to team up with because it would be a fucking mess, dick who i want her to team up with because it would also be a fucking mess but in a different way (renegade arc part 2 but this time theyre both heroes so rose can annoy him even more), duke who i want to include just because i love him even though i cant imagine any reason for him and rose to interact, young justice who arent all gotham heroes but i want them to be around to temporarily absorb rose just for fun, and the entire arrowfam who have no reason to be in gotham but i just want rose to fuck around with them as a treat to ME

as for slade. i think that their relationship is best written when it is really complicated for her :) so i need her to fall back into the cycle of going to him and looking for his approval and being constantly disappointed and angry when he refuses to give it to her :)

anyways ARCS. i dont have a lot of specific ideas for arcs besides another arc of rose giving up the name ravager (bc it didnt fucking stick last time), an arc making her a lesbian (stop booing me im right) and maybe an arc of rose killing slade then immediately spiraling about it bc :))))) yippee :))))))))))

okay this is already embarrassingly long so im gonna stop but i just have so many rose thoughts dc hire me

#i totally havent thought about this too much what are you talking about #rose wilson #dc

[drunklollipop]

(shaking you by the shoulders) YOU GET IT. YOU GET ITTTT. ITS LIKE AN EVIL SPECIAL INTEREST. LIKE A CAR WRECK.

From an autistic person, Autistic Blaire is so true and real. I get she’s supposed to be malicious about gender but she’s deliberately written to want the best for people but not understand boundaries. If someone sat her down and told her (and the author wants to write her as anything but the ex-girlfriend) and said “hey, you’re cis. So am I.” she’d back off. But nobody can say what they mean despite the fact that they do nothing but talk at each other for 300+ pages. You’re right about the QT collective being more interesting/entertaining but they’re the same 1-2 personality traits as all the other side characters who show up to talk for a few pages and then disappear for 5 chapters. We know they’re not gonna get with either of our leads so they’re just “tall stoic one”, “mom and daughter”, “short buff one”, “misogynist” “crushing on misogynist” “trans guy who wants a boyfriend” etc etc. I get everything I need to know out of less than a sentence so I don’t care where their lack of arcs go. Anyway can’t wait for ballroom night in 2 years where all that happens is Blaire asks that DJ lady what her pronouns are, she doesn’t understand what that means, they all go home after 20 pages of filler dialogue and Riley cries alone or something. And Jaden can finally meet One member of the QT collective in maybe five more chapters if we’re lucky where she’ll continue to not understand gender and nothing will happen.

HELP YEAH she'll spend 500 more pages on edging the readers and introducing 10 new brave radfems who appear in one chapter and are never mentioned again and 5 on jaden and riley (the endgame relationship btw) getting closer (idk riley gets jaden a glass of water and jaden is like HOLY SHIT... I'M GONNA CRY... IS THIS WHAT FRIENDSHIP FEELS LIKE...) and the fans will eat it up.

also kinda unrelated but ive noticed a lot of lb fans like hcing riley as autistic and i dont get why. she is so nt its unreal. i guess its cause most of them are like 16-17 and only ever heard about autism from tumblr meme posts so now they think autism is when shy and awkward.

so funny how rusty is all like yeah im an ally and im chill about autistic riley but then when she accidentally writes characters with actual traits (blaire and jacob) its always a mockery. oh look this woman doesnt get boundaries haha its like shes in a cult. haha this kid struggles with empathy and has a rigid set of interests what an entitled moid.

babygirl also reads like that a bit cause while shes a skyscraper sized strawman i feel like her character is inspired by furry transfems on twitter who age regress to cope either with csa or inability to be a functioning adult by neurotypical standards (or both in most cases). also mad funny how lesbian male separatists used to be basically anarcho communist and now theyre a bunch of neoliberal assholes who think being communist is like the cringiest thing you can be (rusty basically implied this in her babygirl design notes. fucking lmao)

[babydarkstar]

You write? :3

yes i do 😳 above everything else i consider myself a writer. it’s a fundamental part of me—words are what i’m good at, and like an illustrator can create wonderful worlds with lines and color, i strive to do the same with words.

i can remember before i even learned to read i was 4 years old and had stories i wanted to tell. i was 12-14 and i blackened journals with poetry and prose, things i would look back on now and think ‘omg cringe’ but in the moment that was my flow and i’ll never judge myself for that. any sort of creative writing project in school was a guaranteed 100 for me, because i took on the assignment like it was my mission from god. when i was 14/15 my best friend was always the one i would send any original writing/stories to bc she would always hype me up and help me talk through my ideas. i owe a lot of my perseverance to her, because she gave me the encouragement i needed to keep pushing myself to get better and better. i have original characters and stories that i started/worked on when i was 14-18, as well as a lot of stream of consciousness poetry and a few other abstract ocs that i wrote when i was 18-20 and going thru crazy shit w friends and almost-never-quite-lovers. i started this blog when i was 16 and mainly used it as a fandom blog to write star wars fanfiction, and i wouldnt say i established any sort of foothold as a fan content creator, but i published a lot of stuff here and on ao3, ao3 who is my wife and my beloved angel forever and ever til (hopefully only my) death do us part. long live, amen. my inspiration to write ebbs and flows so i don’t push it when it isn’t working for me. for like a year i created content for pedro pascal’s cinematic universe of characters™ when i got super into the mandalorian, but then my interest for it faded. i also started doing drugs again which always hinders my writing and that’s actually a huge reason why i’m sober now, and a huge motivation to stay sober. then i somehow went through an mlp phase like an insane person, and im still working on a collaborative project for rarijack (bless) w an artist who i met via that fandom. the lesbian/sapphic/wlw content creators in mlp fandom on tumblr are actually epic tho they are few and far between. quite a few hidden gems, but v hidden bc there are so many creators and not everyone gets the attention they deserve. mlp didn’t spark my desire to create fan content/fic quite like the locked tomb tho, which is my current obsession and also permanently altered my brain chemistry like nothing i’ve ever read before and oh my god in like 3ish months ive literally written probably upwards of 80k words of a modern/college au that i’m still working the kinks out of. and it is. mostly smut because i saw these lesbians and i was like yall deserve to kiss and have narsty (meaningful) dyke sex and also hold each other for 17hours straight and not have to deal with so much shit. but then again i also am putting them through their own trials and tribulations in the au. so. yknow. some characters beg to be traumatized. it’s a character study, among other things. lmao. but yeah i havent posted anything for tlt yet bc one im just a little bit scared of the fandom on here and also ive set myself with this goal that i want to FINISH a story and publish it bc i always end up posting my stuff without finishing and when i read fic i like it to have a promise of an ending, so i also want to emulate that as a writer, even just on a personal level of wanting to say i’m capable of starting and finishing something meaningful like that. i also havent ever posted original work/poetry (maybe some poetry i cant remember) bc it’s. idk more near and dear to me than fanfiction, and i consider everything i write very near and dear, so i guard the og stuff w my life lmao.

damn. sorry for the life story but. it really is just a fundamental part of who i am. i’m in the process of becoming a kindergarten teacher and one thing i’ve always wanted to do was to learn how to create stories that are relevant for my students. i’ve also always wanted to create a children’s book; one of my lovely coworkers has a degree in studio art and she’s dreamt of being an illustrator for a children’s book, so i’ve been seriously considering doing that with her at some point in the future, once my life is more settled and i’m able to focus on it and give it the attention it needs <3 thanks for your curiosity hehehe

#asks #about me #yeah lmao i think it’s funny to keep writer in my bio #even if i never share Writing. but yknow. we contain multitudes etc

[menalez]

i feel so bad for you with the callouts about you faking being a lesbian bc of posts you made when you were a young teen

i just found writing from when iw was 12 of me pretending to like men and it hurts so much and its so fucking stupid it was kind of like your old posts at least it was completely private

the way it was written was like me trying to force myself to feel those ways and i even remember researching like most attractive man ever to try and find a guy to act like i was attracted to all while looking at them and feeling nothing at all... and id search for like hours trying to find a boy that i felt anyting for to pretend to wajt as a boyfriend.... i never even found one! my friend told me maybe i was 'aesthetically gay'when i was like "soo im totally straight but i do not find any men attractive at all"

i just have no idea how i didnt realize earlier i wasnt attracted to men with all that bfjdmfjd

i feel u 😭 the wildest part is that post was made to paint a certain image. there’s no emphasis on the posts being primarily from 2013-2014. nothing highlighting the fact that i was literally like 14-16 in ALL of the posts (and that the person who was calling me out is calling 15 year old me a whore / slut for what r obviously jokes. if i as a 15 year old managed to have sex 500 times with 420 men while in an long distance “relationship”… wouldn’t that be indicative of something rly insidious? like they’re obviously not legitimate numbers & were me exaggerating ridiculously bc i didn’t want to answer such questions. i didn’t know if my rapist / rape counted. i was dissociated through a lot of it). the wildest part is she intentionally ignored all the posts highlighting what ive been saying: i was literally on substances a lot of the time when in that guy’s vicinity. i considered him a friend and didn’t want a relationship but then gave in after he kept insisting we were together & facing other pressure and he was giving me substances to get my guard down & be able to do things to me. i even made posts back then saying “idk if i like guys at all or if im into girls or if i like anyone” and talking about how i don’t understand attraction and don’t feel love. i talked about the guy making me cry all the time (& would then downplay it and act like i cry over everything) and there’s hints that i was attempting suicide and on sedatives the day our “relationship” started (which was the day he decided we were in a relationship. i repeatedly said i don’t want it) and drunk + had repeatedly tried to kill myself the day i lost my virginity (if that even counts. maybe the time i was raped is when i lost it? who knows.). and when asked why i won’t leave or when id defend him it’s almost always “he’s the only person who’s there for me” “im scared”… never “i love him” or “im attracted to him” or anything of the sort. i was baffled going thru the blog bc i didn’t realise there were so many hints that it was unwanted. etc etc etc. no wonder when i finally ended it and refused to back down (had to do it repeatedly for like 6 months) he immediately said “is it bc you’re a lesbian?” 😐.

also yeah sadly the only diff between me and the Real Lesbians trying to argue im lying about my sexuality is that their closeted shenanigans isnt available for everyone to look at and analyse and pick apart. their trauma isn’t there on display for people to call them liars and partake in abuse apologism with. but this whole thing has only confirmed to me that my truth remains my truth & my story. it was pretty upsetting seeing how i was somehow so aware of my lack of attraction to men but so in denial of it at the same time. and it made me realise that that whole portion of my life might’ve been even worse than i remembered. i remember the suicide attempts but i didn’t realise how often i was out of it.

ALSO anon that’s such a mood. i did a lot of the same stuff 💀

#anonymous

[dizzyiscrocodile]

I listened through The Magnus Archives on random recommendation from my cousin after they figured out I liked creepy shit, analog horror, and podcasts.

I had no idea it would be gay, so around episode 100, I told my step mother, “hey! You would like this audio drama I’m really into!” And I sent her a link, and within a week it was all we could talk about it.

I avoided social media like the plague, telling myself I wouldn’t engage with the fanbase at all until I finished the magnus archives . My favorite was Martin, and my headcannons went Ace/aro Jon, and panromantic Martin.

Then JonMartin hit and my entire world collapsed. Not in a bad way, no, it was wonderful. It was all I could ever hope for . It was wonderfully written and I adored them together as a couple.

“Then what the hell is the issue dizzy???”

IVE BEEN CONTINUOUSLY ACCUSED BY MY STEP MOTHER FOR ONLY CONSUMING QUEER CONTENT. I didn’t know… and BOY, does the magnus archives get gay. I love it, I love it all, but when my step mother reaches that fateful episode and it clicks that those fuckers gay, I am in deep, deep shit.

When I first heard it I consoled myself with “it’ll just be in the background, right? It’d probably be censored because media is just like that, it’ll probably be very very back on the back burner —“

God I’m so glad it wasn’t but there is absolutely no way I’m getting out of those awkward stares. I’m going to have to get down on my knees and promise her I did not in fact recommend her a gay piece of media on purpose…

My heart krinkle!!! I enjoyed it so much and s5 absolutely blew my expectations out of the water but I dread the looks I will get from my step mother once she gets to jmart.

OuGh,,, # finish a media before recommending it to your parents .

Dude, you guys seen bly manor too??? I’m a lesbian my whole family knows I’m a lesbian I DID NOT KNOW IT WOULD BE GAY I DIDNT AND THEN THE GIRLS STARTED KISSING AND ALL EYES WERE ON ME !!!! MISERABLE !!!!!

#tma spoilers #TMA #the magnus archives #the magnus pod #podcast

[stepsofthepalace]

Still discovering new things about myself every day…

I’ve been having a lot of thoughts about this and I think I just need to write them down and get them out so I can stop running over them again and again in my head.

YouTube kept recommending me this video about signs that you could be asexual. I kind of dismissed it the first couple times, being like “well I don’t need to watch this, bc I’m not.” I’ve known about asexuality and had ace friends for the better part of a decade, and I’ve been pretty sure I’m demi for much of that time.

But then the video kept popping up in my feed… and I watch a *lot* of YouTube, particularly putting it on in the background while I’m working since I’m generally doing fairly low-mental-effort computer work a lot of the time and I like to watch videos/listen to podcasts/listen to music while I do it

So I finally decided to put it on for curiosity’s sake. And wow… I got slammed in the face with several things in that video that hit a little too close to home. Like, stopped me in my tracks, causing me to rewind and listen to what they said multiple times over kind of close to home

And Loveless by Alice Osman was referenced at one point in the video, and since I was already having a mild panic about what this all meant, I checked it out of the library and read it in less than a day. I full on sobbed at one point reading it

And all this is also happing while I’ve been (somewhat unenthusiastically) planning a date with someone on hinge. I had recently updated my profile to demisexual instead of lesbian after a date where the other person had clearly been interested in sex on the first date if I was open to it (which there’s nothing wrong with that but I was very embarrassed and wanted to make sure I was clear about it from the start now that I was not interested in that).

So this girl I was planning a date with asked me what demisexuality looked like for me (especially since she was more open to casual sex) and I was weirdly thrown by the question - particularly since I think I had just watched the video that day or the day before. I ended up unintentionally leaving her on read for like two days just trying to parse through my feelings about the question

Also also, I watch a lot of JaidenAnimations videos, and she made a video about being AroAce a while back (maybe like a year ago?) and there were a few things she’d said in that video that had hit a little close to home, but I’d more or less written it off. And now because of this new video, and the book, I’m remembering my feelings about her video and it’s causing even more questions and mild spiraling

Anyway, I’m still going on the date this weekend, but it’s hitting at a weird time for me - after the video (or videos) and the book, and trying to do more research in my limited free time right now, I’m starting to think I might be fully ace. And I never thought this was the case until recently, but I think I may be on the Aromatic spectrum too…

Like I don’t think I’m fully Aro, but maybe demiromantic or even grayromantic. Bc I’ve had crushes before, but they’re very few and far between, and honestly I think some of them were just friends that I felt extremely close to and and wanted to hang out with all the time (like I’m not really sure if I ever wanted to date them, or even kiss them, or if I was just misinterpreting my strong platonic feelings??)

The only person I *know* I had romantic feelings for was the one girlfriend I had in sophomore year of college - and I was friends with her doe the better part of a year before those feelings made themselves known. But that ended pretty spectacularly after a very short span of time

For years I thought I was still just traumatized from that experience. I thought it exacerbated my fear of intimacy, that I was being too prudish, that I was picky, that it was just my anxiety getting the better of me, that I was a (very) late bloomer, etc

Ive always made a shit ton of excuses for why I didn’t/don’t date much (“i don’t have time right now,” “I don’t like dating apps/I find them tedious/stressful”, “I plan to move in the near future so what’s the point,” “I’ve gone on a couple dates recently but nothings stuck”) but now I think I understand that there’s more to it than that

I’m half a year away from turning 30. My sister was married with a baby by this point. So many of my current friends or my old friends from college are married or getting married, and so many of those who aren’t are still in long term relationships, moved in with their significant others and gotten a dog together

I don’t know if I really have a final point to this post other than that I think the closest label I’ve got at this point is potentially asexual grayromantic lesbian (boy what a mouthful). It’s nice I guess to understand more about myself, but it also adds to this feeling of dread that I’m never going to have what my friends and siblings have. That I’ll be a forever-third-wheel (or fifth, seventh, etc depending on the size of the group)

It makes me think of an analogy I use a lot for why I think having 2 kids or 4 kids is better than having 3 kids. If you go to an amusement park, it’s easier if you have an even number - because then everyone always has someone to sit with on the rides (I acknowledge that this analogy is very monogamous and it doesn’t really take polyamory into account, but it makes sense to me bc I’m monogamous). But what I’m worried about is that I’ll never have that person to ride with. That I’ll always be the extra person making the group an odd number

Any way that’s all definitely too much information, but I’ve been spiraling a bit as I try to come to terms with this and figure things out more decidedly. I probably should have just written this in a journal or seen a therapist or something (not that I can afford one), but there’s something nice about yelling it into the void and the void potentially saying something back, idk

If you did read this whole thing for some reason, thanks

#tldr; I think I might be fully asexual and coming to terms with that is definitely a journey #long and rambling post #if I remember to I’ll probably delete this later

[hikari-ni-naritai]

multiples of.... 9! though some of these don't make a lot of sense to ask I think

thats fine i would not expect someone to actually read the questions they send me so some of them are bound to be weird every once in a while

9. Describe your perfect mate

'mate' is such a weird word for that. my perfect mate is a bloke from liverpool who takes me to the pub to play pool. my perfect girlfriend tho would be someone who is kind and patient with me when im fucking up a social situation and who always encourages me to be better than i am.

18. this one actually isnt there? i love ask games from 2015 theyre so fucking busted

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

i....... dont remember? i dont think so. and youd think id remember something like that. but i can imagine myself forgetting it pretty easily. so i dont think so

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

im too demisexual to like anyone else lmao

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?

this one's fun bc we've chosen the perfect years to catch sight of emily kissing someone. the answer is 1. ive only ever kissed one person at all, ever.

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

plenty of people. if we're talking specifically people i dated, i couldnt forget any of them.

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

a thorny question. i have admittedly come a long way from my super religious days. i think, personally, i keep 'having sex' separate from 'sexual activities' as a subset of sexual activities specifically involving whatever shit is between both of yall's legs including the ass (and including the strap frankly). but like. this is purely semantics, its not like theres a functional difference to me between having sex and engaging in sexual activities. if i date someone and she says 'dont have sex with other people' im not gonna go suck some girls dick and come back like 'well its not technically sex' like thats just an asshole move.

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

go follow my sideblog if you want the answer to this one.

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

'attractive' is such a weird term to me. as much as i like, am 100% a lesbian, the way i experience attraction is so far removed from my sexuality that i would put david tennant on this list, probably bc i was just watching good omens yesterday. other than that, uhhh. i liked . there was a really pretty girl on the subway in london once. the girl with the catholic name in my high school. the girl with the gray eyes and long fingers from my high school. im having trouble remembering what people look like. any girl with freckles. and uhh that girl from the tiktok of the cavewoman drawing the sexy fish, shes really cute.

[jimsmovieworld]

THE SWEETEST THING- 2002 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

What is this? The greatest movie of all time?

Quite possibly yes. And i cant believe ive never seen this before now. The sweetest thing is about a group of best friends who dance, drink, have fun, and generally cause chaos wherever they go....

Cameron Diaz plays Christina Walters, the main character. She's every guys dream, but doesnt open up to them so they brush it off as her being a lesbian because its 2002.

Christina Applegate plays Courtney, shes fun, hilarious, gives legitamately good advice, and has a great pair of fake jugs.

Jimsmovieworld Hall of Famer Selma Blair plays Jane, shes stunning, lovely, and getting over a guy that left her and keeps ending up in ridiculous situations. During the course of the movie she fucks a guy in an elephant costume, takes a dress to the drycleaners after some guy busts on it and bumps into everyone shes ever met there, and accidentally gets a guys dick stuck in her mouth for hours during a blimpjob. Unreal. Selma Blair says she got the job as no one else wanted to do that scene.

The main plot of the movie revolves around Christina meeting Peter (Thomas Jane) in a club that she initially argues with but realises shes attracted to, she missed her chance to meet him at a party and remembers his brother (Jason Bateman) is getting married. Realising this is her only chance to see him again she decides to gatecrash the wedding with Courtney. But not before picking up these electric outfits from a local store...

The scene of them buying the dresses was fun. Basically all the scenes are fun? Love all the main actresses and they had such great rapport. They seemed like real friends and that always helps a movie be more enjoyable. Thought theyre were some hilarious moments, an occasional joke here and there that wasnt that funny, but when youre having this much fun, who cares.

The sweetest thing has flawless early 2000s vibes. Love the fashion. Enjoyed the song Strange Condition by Pete Yorn.

The Sweetest Thing was directed by Roger Kumble who also directed Selma Blair in Cruel Intentions (also the greatest movie of all time).

Was written by Nancy M Pimental who cameos as the girl who keeps throwing up in the club.

Just when you think the movie cant get any better, out of nowhere.... BANG!

PARKER POSEY PALOOZA!!!

Parker Posey plays Judy! The beautiful bride to be, except it turns out that shes actually set to marry Peter! Much to the ladies surprise. Despite receiving top billing Parker is unfortunately only in a few scenes, however she was excellent as always and really brightened up the screen. Looking good Parker.

The only other thing i want to mention is that maybe half an hour into the movie they go to a chinese restaurant and start singing a song about penises that escalates into a huge musical number that the entire restaurant gets involved in. Maybe because id just eaten a large space cake before i put this on, but i nearly choked to death. Its so unbelievably ridiculous and bizarre that i couldnt stop laughing for the full 5 minutes. It was unsurprisingly cut out of the US release and only appears on the unrated dvd. In a 20 year reunion interview, all three of the main actresses said theyd love to do a sequel. Fingers Crossed.

The Sweetest Thing received pretty brutal reviews. I think this movie was very much ahead of its time in terms of having a female cast do a comedy with R rated or even just gross out gags. Theyre seem to be lots of them now but people perhaps werent ready for them back then. To wrap things up, this is the greatest movie of all time and i cant wait to rewatch it.

#the sweetest thing #selma blair #cameron diaz #thomas jane #christina applegate #parker posey #movie #film #comedy movie #cult movie #movie review #2000s #2000s movie

[ambrosialdesire]

https://www.tumblr.com/ambrosialdesire/748781466686832640/httpswwwtumblrcomambrosialdesire748770227596

Yes.. more ideas pls. Love girls kissing

-🌷

im gonna be so fr, ive never written lesbian content in detail before even though i have some ocs that are full fledged girl kissers lol BUT IMMA TRY MY BEST RN

mikasa was the one who took the initiative since she has the fading regrets of not confessing to eren before he was into you. cause in boundless/bounded, i feel like the scene where eren asking mikasa what has he to her wasn’t really in a romantic sense sorta but rather the confirmation if she was going to be able to change her answer or not to see if the path is really unavoidable yk (aka just the normal scene but without romantic intentions lol)

reader was shocked bc she didn’t think that mikasa liked her before (she also thought that eren was like mikasa’s one true love before yk 😭) and also that liking girls was an actual option, even though ymir was literally blatantly flirting with historia haha but she reciprocated, mostly to see if it’ll work out and the companionship would be nice as well.

their first kiss was really cute cause it was actually reader that kissed mikasa first. what happened was that it was early in the morning, she had to get up first to make breakfast (since it was her turn) and to take care for the child, so in her drowsiness as she got up, she mumbled a groggy good morning to mikasa before giving a peck on her lips and moving onto her duties. you have no idea how quickly mikasa got up from her sleep and ran to her to return the kiss more deeply. this causes reader to wake up even more cause what is going ON and then she starts realizing what she did earlier and what mikasa’s doing rn, so she kisses her back yippee ‼️

ngl i feel like after the reader and eren experience, she’d be more hesitant when it comes down to the more sexual things in the relationship and since she won’t tell mikasa what happened, she doesn’t push her boundaries about it, she’s simply fine with kissing and cuddling her.

mikasa’s a very coddling mother to eren and reader’s child, she teaches them some highly illegal defense and attack moves that she learned during her time as a soldier just in cause they face any bullies in the neighborhood or school 😭 but they share some sweet moments, one was where reader catches the kid sleeping in mikasa’s arms when she was reading a story book for them to go to sleep. even though mikasa doesn’t really completely see herself as the kid’s second mother, she believes and feels like she’s more of an aunt since they’re from eren and reader, she does let them call her mama (reader is mommy) cause she knows it’ll be confusing to them if she’s called auntie and kissing their mom 💀 LMAO

the both of them do teach the kid eventually about the full details of their bio dad and don’t hide the fact that he caused a whole ass mass homicide to humanity, and yeah that’s gonna be hella shocking to hear about that your dad is a mass murderer so they don’t really claim that part of his genes (despite them really looking like eren), which makes them a little sad cause they still partially believe that eren was a good person but they understand the reasoning behind it so they don’t force the idea that he was once someone admirable.

yandere mikasa is hella protective over this little family of theirs and would do anything for the both of them, so when an out-of-the-blue intrusion occurs, it ends just as quickly as it happens. she’s the only one awake when it happened and she’d do anything to protect the long deserved peace they have, what’s three more bodies and a lost rug? when reader wakes up, no blood or bodies are seen, she has no idea that a break-in even occurred. all she noticed was the nice rug they just bought last month was missing and mikasa just simply says that it got too filthy so she’s cleaning it. ignorance is bliss and she’ll keep it that way for her no matter what.

#love-message #boundless ask #bounded ask #🌷 anon

[alicent-apologist]

Kinda curious about this. I’m also not a huge admirer of the Targs. Seeing as you’re not a fan of both the Targaryen Dynasty in general and the two most popular Targaryen characters (Daenerys and Rhaenyra), which members of the Targaryen dynasty do you like or find the most interesting? Like if you had to pick the top 5 and why them? Could be male or female

Difficult question! I feel like, especially with the Targs, there's a lot of Madonna/Whore complexes. Either the women are saints who suffered quietly and died oh so sadly, like Naerys, Daella and Rhaella or they're evil and promiscuous like Saera, Viserra and Aerea. Some of this can be explained because 'Fire and Blood' is written by maesters in a very misogynistic society but, meh, it just makes the Targaryens less interesting to me.

If we're talking about which ones I like the most, my top five would be Helaena, Aemond, Aegon II, Daeron and Jaehaera. But that's because I know the most about them and they're like actual characters to me not just caricatures. I've written about them and I have headcannons about them in a way that I don't have for the rest of the Targaryens. (Little Jaehaerys and Maelor are also very close to my heart but you said top 5 and I have more thoughts about canon Jaehaera post-Dance)

In terms of most interesting and who I'd love to learn more about, here's my list:

1. Queen Rhaena (Rhaena the lesbian). Her story is so fascinating! The first child of Aenys and Alyssa, the original Dreamfyre rider herself! So cool that her loser father had to make her make herself smaller so her loser husband Aegon would look less like a loser. She literally sent her daughters away during Maegor's reign and made sure she didn't know where they were so the information couldn't be tortured out of her. She tried to kill Maegor on her wedding night and when she escaped to join Jaehaerys she literally stole Blackfyre from him!! I don't even have to go on, she is by far the coolest Targaryen and GRRM had to nerf her to make Jaehaerys I and Alysanne look even remotely bog standard.

2. Aerea Targaryen. She just climbed on top of Balerion the Black Dread and wasn't seen for a year. What happened during that time?? What did she see?? Did Balerion bring her back to King's Landing to try to save her life?? I would read a seven book series on that one year. The way she died was awful but it only adds to the mystery.

3. Daenerys Targaryen (daughter of Aegon IV). Because of her the Water Gardens were made and she started the tradition that highborn and lowborn Dornish children should play together. I wonder what she thought of the Dornish court in comparison to King's Landing? Was she actually in love with Daemon Blackfyre? Did she grow to love Maron Martell? I'd love a book about their reign.

4. I suppose Daeron II Targaryen was okay. I like that he clearly saw how superior the Dornish were and that the Targaryens were a blight on Westeros (sending Aemon to the citadel because there were 'too many dragons').

5. Aerion Brightflame. I just like that he was crazy, named his son Maegor and drank wildfire. More Targaryens should do that.

#Text #Anon #Answered