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a-small-writer-in-a-big-world · 1 year

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Home is Whenever I’m With You

Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x f!reader

Warnings: some angst, fluff, smut (18+) mdni, handjob, oral (m!receiving), sub!Ghost, sleepy sex? Ghost finishes early

Words: 11.7k

Synopsis: Simon is finally home and a few things need to be taken care of…

Link to The Roommate Series Masterlist

You are currently reading part 6 of The Roommate Series

Simon’s eyes fluttered open when there was a knock at the front door of the flat and he was met with you sleeping just inches from him, a sight that was incredibly unfamiliar to him but he had never felt more grateful for. He could’ve fallen back to sleep, he had never felt more comfortable laying in his bed than he did right now, especially as he listened to your soft breathing. He would’ve if he wasn’t so enamored by how much he liked the way you looked across from him.

He had seen you asleep before but this was something else entirely. You were asleep in his bed, you were asleep next to him in his arms as if this were something normal, as if the both of you had done this before.

You were deep in sleep, not moving an inch except for your breathing, and yet you still held onto him with the same comforting warmth you gave him earlier this morning.

You. It’s all he could think about now and last night, it was everything he had missed for three months on base and in the battlefield. You had been stuck on his mind practically the entire time he was gone, he had dreamt about this moment so many times and had hoped that once he was home he could have you fall asleep on him just like you had before he left.

Of course, that had been before he had been injured.

Simon stared at your face and noticed your puffy eyes. A small pit formed in his stomach as he was reminded of how upset you had been and his face fell. He pulled an arm away from you and dared to rest his hand on your cheek, holding his breath as he waited for you to stir. When you didn’t, he very softly, as if he weren’t touching you at all, ran his thumb across your skin.

He had never seen you cry so much. He’d seen you cry over university but this had been entirely different, this had been something that he wasn’t used to and it made his chest ache the more he remembered the panic in your eyes.

You had been crying because of him, for him.

No one had ever cried for him before and he wasn’t sure why he hadn’t expected it when he had run home to the one person he knew who wasn’t familiar with the wounds he’s gotten from the military. He didn’t want you to cry for him or because of him but unfortunately the damage was already done.

He had hurt you, intentionally or not, by coming home before he was properly patched up. He had been so desperate to see you one more time, thinking in his delirious state that it was going to be the last, that he had hurt you.

Not only that, he had ruined the separation between you and his other life that you should never come into contact with.

You saw his dog tags, which was bad enough considering it was impossible to come up with a lie as to why he had them around his neck, but worst of all you had seen the mask.

The one that enemies saw when they were about to die, the one that was covered in blood, the one that haunted the nightmares of those who managed to escape but not for long. The one that kept him strong and hid everything that was Simon, that was the reminder that Simon Riley is in fact dead to everyone but you or his team.

You had glimpsed the image of Ghost. Simon would run away if he had the chance.

He’d run because you didn’t need that in your life, you didn’t need the hardened, cold blooded killer who would do anything to get the job done, who you would probably look at with fear and disgust. He didn’t want Ghost to be known by someone who is his life, who was everything to him when the persona was the worst parts of him that should never be seen.

He’d run and hide from you because he knew that if you dug any further into who he is, you’d do it before he could. He didn’t want you to leave him and yet he couldn’t think of a life without you in it.

Especially as you unconsciously leaned into him, your warmth over taking him once more and bringing him out of those dreaded thoughts.

His eyes fluttered shut and he very carefully rested his forehead against yours as if he would be able to read your thoughts, as if he could wiggle his way inside your mind so you could think happily of him in your dreams.

A soft sigh left his chest and he situated himself to go back to sleep. There was no point in getting up when you were right there, holding him like you loved him, and when it hasn’t been more than an hour since the two of you had fallen asleep.

Another knock, louder this time and more demanding made Simon clench his jaw as he was reminded of the intrusion. He glared at his bedroom door and debated on whether or not he should even get up before he decided that he would scare off who it was before they woke you up.

Very carefully he untangled himself from you and watched you like a hawk to make sure that he wouldn’t disturb you.

His entire body was heavy as he attempted to get up. He began to breathe heavier as he felt dizzy once he managed to sit on the edge of the bed. He suffered too much blood loss because he couldn’t have been bothered to stay on base for a few days longer so now he was paying the price for his stubbornness. He should’ve let you take him to the hospital, especially now as he fought against passing out next to you, but he didn’t want you to go through that.

You would’ve been stuck inside the waiting room for who knows how long and the doctors probably wouldn’t have told you anything. He couldn’t put you through more strife than he already has.

Though, as he glanced back at your exhausted face he was sure it wouldn’t have made a difference.

Simon took a few deep breaths and pushed himself off his bed. He stumbled and caught himself on the wall before he fell on the ground. He groaned when a splitting headache hit him almost immediately and he thought about slumping back into bed, but another aggressive knock came from the front door.

You made a noise and he snapped his head back towards you. You rolled and turned your back towards Simon before you went still again, hopefully going back to sleep since you desperately needed it.

He let out a soft huff before he stumbled out of his room with the intention to scare off whoever was banging at his door at such an early time in the morning. He had to walk along the wall as every step felt like he had lead in his feet and he was sure he probably looked half dead, but he didn’t care. He hoped that it would deter the people knocking on his door, especially if it was one of the neighbors he didn’t particularly like.

Simon swung the door open with a glare and his heart stopped.

All three of his teammates were standing in the morning mist outside of his flat. The very place that had been off limits to every single one of them for the past three years, the one place that hadn’t been touched by the other darker part of his life until this very moment.

He stood there frozen in the doorway as his team gave him worried but relieved looks.

“Fuckin’ hell, you’re alive.” Price breathed out and looked him over before he placed a supporting hand on his shoulder.

The contact made Simon jump and he stood up straighter, narrowing his eyes at them as he tried his hardest to get his pounding heart under control. He prayed that you wouldn’t wake up now, he had never wanted you to stay hidden more than this moment as he gripped the door tightly.

“What’re you doing here?” He asked shortly.

“What do ye think?” Soap exclaimed a little too loudly and Simon clenched his jaw. “Ya fuckin’ ran out bleeding like a stuck pig.”

“We had to make sure you were okay and to drag your ass back before you bled out.” Gaz added and crossed his arms with a serious look.

“Let’s get you sorted out, yeah?” Price attempted to wrap an arm around Simon’s shoulder so he could help him to the car but he didn’t budge.

Simon shrugged off the old man’s hand and didn’t look away when his superior’s eyes hardened. He wasn’t one to push Price away often, if at all, and he could tell that his stubbornness wasn’t welcomed, especially since it had been a long trip from the base to his flat.

“M’fine.” Simon gestured to the bandages around him but Price didn’t look convinced.

Rather, he looked incredibly unimpressed as he crossed his arms and gave him a serious look, one that he often used on insubordinate rookies or on one of the sergeants when they decided to dick around for too long. He looked Simon over and licked his lips in deep thought.

He saw right through Simon, he always did. It was like the man had studied him his entire life, he knew everything from his little ticks to the way that he knew Simon would never run out from the base for anything. Nothing else but work was that important to Simon, at least, that’s what he thought he knew.

“You wouldn’t run off like this for no reason.” Price stepped closer to him. “You’ve been acting strange and I want answers.”

Simon thought of a million different lies he could tell him and he was sure that the old man would know that he was lying. Nothing would sound believable, nothing would make leave him the infirmary, half stitched back together and beaten bloody, except for you but you were supposed to be a secret. He was supposed to keep you safe by not saying anything about you.

He opened his mouth to say something, anything to get the heat off his back.

“Simon, what’s going on?” You called out from further in the flat.

Simon’s stomach dropped and his mouth went dry. He wasn’t sure what to do and he suddenly lost his voice as he looked back into the flat to see you rushing into the living room with the same look of fear you had just an hour ago. His eyes softened as he saw just how exhausted you looked in the light of day and if it weren’t for the fact that he could hardly hold himself up, he would’ve carried you back to bed.

You placed a gentle hand on his arm to steady him, your eyes full of worry before you looked at his team.

“Oh…hi.” You weakly greeted them and attempted to give them a welcoming smile.

Price’s eyes softened and he uncrossed his arms as he gave a quick glance towards Simon, as if he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing. There was a small smile hidden underneath his beard however as he looked back at you.

Simon wasn’t sure what to do. The cat was out of the bag now and though he wished he could tell his team to forget you and for you to just pretend that you didn’t just see a part of him that he never wanted you to see, he knew that was childish. There was no point in trying to keep up the facade, especially after everything that happened before this moment.

You stepped closer to Simon and gave him an unsure look. He could see what was going on through your mind and how you were putting the pieces together, you were too smart for your own good.

“Sorry to wake you so early.” Price gave you a polite smile as he outstretched his hand for you to take. “Price. Friend of Simon’s.”

“I’m his roommate.” You took his hand with a hesitant smile of your own and introduced yourself.

The gesture seemed to break Soap and Gaz out of their spell, they had been staring between you and Simon with wide but knowing eyes, before they introduced themselves as well. Simon didn’t like the way their faces had lit up either, especially when they gave him smiles that had him wanting to pull you back into the flat.

Truly, he regretted coming back home the way he did.

“I don’t mean to sound rude, but why are you here?” You wondered in a soft voice that couldn’t be mistaken for rudeness even if you tried.

“We came to check up on him.” Price nodded towards the bandages around Simon’s midsection.

You gave Simon an uncertain look as you came into closer contact with his work than you ever had before. You took a few steps back but Simon placed a hand on your lower back to stop you which had you giving him a nervous glance, as if to ask him if it was alright for you to be present, which hurt him a lot more than he wanted it to.

As much as he wanted to keep you a secret, it would be wrong to do it now that his team knew about you. He couldn’t control you or this situation so there was no point in trying to act as if there was a chance to recover from this. In this moment, you didn’t need him to keep secrets, you needed him to be truthful, especially after you patched him up.

“They’re not bad.” He gave you a reassuring look and rubbed his thumb into your back.

“‘Not bad’, he says.” Soap lightly mocked and shook his head. “Worked with ya for over three fucking years and all you can say is ‘not bad’?”

Simon heard you hold back a chuckle and his eyes snapped down to look at your face. He felt some relief when he saw that you had some of the brightness back in your eyes as you watched Soap grumble about Simon being ‘an arsehole’. Just seeing a different expression on your face that wasn’t sadness or fear was enough for him to let go of the fact that you were meeting his team.

“If you don’t mind,” Price caught your attention as he continued to give you a polite smile. “Can we come in so I can check on your roommate?”

You glanced back and Simon did as well, seeing that your eyes were glued to the mess in the living room. You glanced up at him and he knew that you were unsure about letting them see the flat in such a state. However, he shrugged and stepped out of the doorway.

“Sure.” You followed after him, practically gluing yourself to his side as you wrapped a hand around his forearm to steady him.

Simon couldn’t help but rely on you to keep him steady even though he wished he had enough strength to at least pretend he wasn’t in bad shape. It was nearly impossible to fake it when your warmth sunk into his cold skin and practically healed every sore feeling he had stuck inside his muscles. He couldn’t push you away, not that he even would think to, especially when he glanced at you and saw the deep concern that struck him to his core.

A pit formed in his stomach as you helped him sit down on the couch once more, a soft puff escaping his chest.

“Let’s see.” Price stepped over and sat next to Simon before he began to undo his dirty wrappings.

It was splotched with dried blood that got darker the more he took them apart. The giving pressure from his side made his eyes twitch as the throbbing pain came back. It was dull this time but it was just more on top of his exhausted body that had him just wanting to pass out to forget about everything since he went on the mission.

He looked up at you and his heart ached.

You were holding your arms closer to you as you stared intensely at his side as his wound was slowly being revealed. You dug your fingernails into your skin and he could tell that you were taking deep breaths to calm your nerves. The worry across your face made you look even more exhausted as you hovered behind Price as if you were waiting to jump in and help.

“This is a really nice flat.” Gaz spoke up with a calming voice and caught your attention as well as Simon’s. “I know Simon didn’t decorate it.”

“It was a little bare when I moved in.” A small smile tugged at your lips and Simon remembered how empty the flat had been before you.

“No color, right?”

“None.”

Gaz chuckled and you smiled, your attention pulled towards him and not Simon which let him feel some relief. The sergeant glanced his way and gave him a discreet thumbs up that he nodded at, understanding immediately what he was doing and couldn’t help but feel incredibly grateful for his friend.

“How long have you two lived together?” Soap wondered curiously with that wide grin of his.

“Three years.” You explained and both of the sergeants' eyes widened. “I moved because I go to the university near here.”

“Oh, uni! Been to any parties?”

Soon conversation was flowing between the three of you, not exactly too upbeat but it was enough to distract you as Price took the rest of the bandages off. Simon had his attention on you the entire time, feeling a mix of so many emotions as you forgot about him for the time being.

He’d have to pay them back somehow, to show his gratitude.

“Ripped your stitches.” Price grumbled, low enough for just Simon to hear.

Simon glanced over at his captain to see the serious look on his face as he began to clean his wound and start rewrapping it. He uttered an apology that he truly didn’t mean but the captain shook his head as he glanced towards you, a slight twinkle in his eyes.

“S’alright, the pain is punishment enough.” He gave him a quick smile. “Just let me know next time, eh?”

“You weren’t supposed to know.” Simon flinched when he touched a particularly sore spot.

“Sorry, Simon.”

However, the captain looked anything but apologetic, in fact he looked a little too proud of himself for having invaded Simon’s private life. Though, Simon hadn’t given him much of a choice to do so and he blamed the fact that he was bleeding out for not thinking that Price wouldn’t come to find him.

Out of everyone, Simon would’ve told Price first if it came down to it and if this hadn’t happened. The old man was reliable to a fault, he couldn’t think of a time when he had thought he couldn’t trust him, so he knew that if Price had known about you from the very beginning he would’ve done everything in his power to get him back to you as quickly as possible. He was sure he was going to air more on the side of caution when sending him out on missions now.

Price finished bandaging him up and hummed at his handiwork.

“Should get you through until you see a medic.” He gave him a comforting pat to his shoulder and Simon nodded. “Ready to go?”

Simon frowned. He knew that he was going back to base the moment that he laid eyes on Price, but he couldn’t help but wish it wasn’t so soon. He didn’t want to leave you, he didn’t want to be away from you anymore, not after he was finally home after three months of self-imposed mental torture.

He just wanted to be with you and feel alive again. He didn’t want to be Ghost anymore, he just wanted to be Simon.

Despite this, he knew he couldn’t push his luck with his captain. He had already tested his boundaries by running out so asking him to let him stay would be too much. He also needed to be properly patched up or else he was looking at an infection.

Simon nodded and with Price’s help, stood up from the couch. He stood there for a moment as he let the dark spots leave his eyes and ignored the dizziness that came from it before he looked at you.

You looked at him with a worried look still on your face but seemed a lot less tense since Soap and Gaz had distracted you.

“Are you okay?” You asked softly and he found himself at a complete loss of words for a few moments.

It was a simple question, something that was normally asked in these kinds of situations and yet hearing it from you made him want to fall into your arms again. The way you had said it didn’t help either, not when you said as if you were prepared to do anything to help him feel better, as if you were going to wrap him up in a blanket and hold him close to you like you’d done before.

He felt his chest warm at the thought, at the promise of safety and warmth from the one person he loved more than anything and it made leaving so much worse.

“Yeah.” He sighed out after he realized he had been staring at you for a lot longer than normal again.

You offered him a smile but he didn’t return it as Price caught your attention.

“There’s a few things that need to be taken care of.” He began and Simon’s mouth went dry when he saw your face fall. “Simon needs to come with us, but I’ll make sure to have him back before the end of the day.”

Simon wanted to laugh, not because Price was lying, but because he knew that it was incredibly unlikely that would happen. It didn’t matter how efficiently things ran in the task force or on base, everything always ended up taking longer than originally planned in order to cover all bases. He’d be lucky to get back home before the end of tomorrow.

“Okay.” You clenched your jaw and held your arms close to your chest again.

Simon could tell you were fighting back a storm of emotions to make yourself look less miserable but you failed at it. It was easy to tell that you were upset as it was written across your face but you didn’t say anything, you didn’t complain, or try to negotiate something.

He didn’t like your silence.

“It was nice to meet you, we’ll see you again, yeah?” Price gave you a smile and you tried to return it as you weakly nodded.

“That’d be nice.” You agreed.

Price glanced towards Simon and gave him a nod before he gestured for the sergeants to follow him. He turned and walked out of the flat without another word as the other two gave Simon sympathetic looks.

“Yeah, we’ll come back around again.” Gaz made his way to the door as well.

“Ye won’t be able to get rid of us.” Soap offered you a fist bump that you accepted before he made his way to the door. “See ya!”

The flat was left silent as the door clicked behind him. It was like there was a dark cloud hanging in the room, the air was thick and it felt like every breath Simon took squeezed his lungs tightly. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to comfort you as you looked at him with tears in your eyes.

They were threatening to fall and he saw you bite your lip to keep it from quivering. You swallowed hard and opened your mouth to say something but when nothing came out you sniffled.

“You need a jacket…” You mumbled and left before he could stop you.

“Thanks.” He said when you came back and handed him one of his black hoodies.

Simon put it on and found his mask, making sure to conceal most of it from you as he grabbed his keys. He searched for his wallet too, and his gloves, and tied his shoes a little slower than normal as he prolonged the inevitable, prolonged the pain instead of ripping the bandaid off.

When he couldn’t find anything else to stall his departure, he came up to you and gently pulled you into him for a hug. He shut his eyes when you wrapped your arms around him and dug your fingers into the fabric of his hoodie as if he’d disappear.

Technically to you, he was.

“Get some rest and don’t wait for me.” He said in your ear and you sniffled again.

“I’ll try.” Your voice was strained and he clenched his jaw.

He pulled back and took your face in his hand, seeing that a few tears rolled down your cheeks despite the fact that you were trying so hard to keep them in. Every tear hurt him and he desperately wanted to be able to hold you for the rest of the day. His eyes softened and he wiped a few of them away with his thumb as he fought the urge to just say fuck it, and stay with you.

“I’ll come back.” He promised and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. “No more tears today.”

You sucked in a breath and let out a strained sob before you wiped your tears away. You nodded and took a few shaky breaths as you tried your hardest to stop crying.

“I’m sorry…”

Simon shushed you softly and placed another kiss on your cheek before he moved to your mouth. It was a chaste kiss since he knew that if he went any further he wouldn’t be walking out of that door, but it took away the rest of your tears for the time being.

When you broke apart he stared down at you with soft eyes full of affection but always deep desire. If anyone dared to take him back into the field before he was ready this time he would have to be dragged out of the flat, he wasn’t leaving for a long time and if he had to pull some strings for it, he would.

He caressed your cheek one more time before he stepped away from you. He didn’t look back as he felt his throat tighten up and tried his hardest to wipe your sorrowful face from his mind.

Unfortunately, it was all he could see as he shut the front door behind him and walked to the car his team had driven to come see him.

It was past dinner when Simon stepped back into the flat, maskless. His tired eyes scanned the now clean living room for you while the heavy weight of the past twenty-four hours pressed against him. He could barely move without feeling like his feet were full of lead and he was sure that had to do with the medicine the medic gave him, which barely took away the pain. He wanted nothing more than to collapse in his bed, hopefully with you again, but he couldn’t get rid of the pit in his stomach that worsened his mood.

He couldn’t disregard the fact that he had put you through so much turmoil because of his own selfishness.

He’d do anything for you even if you didn’t ask, just to make up for the fact that he

Before he could even open his mouth you walked into the room, still surprising him with your ability to know when he’s home even though he made no noise, and dropped his bags on the floor.

His eyes bounced around your face as you came up to him. You looked refreshed, a better contrast to how exhausted you had looked earlier this morning and he felt a little relief when he saw the small smile on your face. However, you still gave him a look of concern as you carefully wrapped your arms around him.

Simon didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you. He held onto you firmly, letting your warmth melt away into the exhaustion he had and he leaned into you. He rested his chin on your head and breathed in the shampoo smell from your hair, the overwhelming feeling of home hitting him so hard he shut his eyes as his vision began to blur.

Fuck, he really missed you.

“You look a lot less pale.” You mumbled into his chest after a few moments of silence. “Good.”

“Fixed my stitches.” He reassured you and pulled you closer into him.

You let out a shaky sigh and nodded before you buried your face in his chest. You were shaking slightly and he knew it was because you were holding back tears. He went to comfort you when you pulled back and looked up at him with teary eyes but a genuine smile on your face that made him clench his jaw tightly.

You were smiling. After all of what he did, you were still smiling at him and all he could do was stare at you as if he hadn’t stumbled in half dead and scared you.

“You’re home.” You sniffled and wiped your eyes. “Sorry…it’s just finally setting in.”

“Did you eat?” He wondered, trying to change the subject even though he was beyond grateful to finally be home with you.

Simon narrowed his eyes at you when you shook your head. He grunted when you gave him a sheepish smile and nearly dragged you into the kitchen so he could force you to eat. The pit in his stomach told him that you hadn’t eaten all day, which he hoped wasn’t true, but he wouldn’t put it past you especially if you had gone back to sleep.

“Why?” He demanded in a soft voice.

“Because I woke up an hour ago and then took a shower.” You explained truthfully but that didn’t stop the look he had. “I also wanted to wait for you…”

“Told you not to.”

“I didn’t want you to eat by yourself!”

Simon let out a heavy sigh. You were too nice, too considerate for his heavy and dark mind right now. He was exhausted, he felt guilty and like shit, which had significantly ruined his patience since this morning and yet you were being so kind to him. He couldn’t understand why you would still act this way after he had shown you what his other life was like.

How could you still want to wait for him? You should’ve eaten and just gone to bed.

“I was going to make ‘Welcome Back Dinner’ anyway.” You shrugged, still smiling as you slipped out of his grasp.

“I’ll help.” He followed you into the kitchen but you shook your head.

“And break tradition? No.”

Simon huffed loudly and stopped you in your tracks. His shoulders had tensed up significantly and he balled his hands into fists as he stared at you. He didn’t really know why he was so upset by it; you were an adult, you were choosing to do this on your own and not because he forced you and yet he couldn’t help but feel incredibly irritated by it.

He should be the one cooking for you and taking care of you. He should be fixing his mistakes, he should be making you feel better, not the other way around.

You turned around and looked him over with knitted eyebrows. You frowned slightly when you noticed how tense he had gotten and for a moment he wondered if you could read his mind just by looking at him. He wondered if you could feel exactly what he was feeling, if you could feel the guilt he had, the anger he had towards himself.

“Hey.” Your voice was soft as you came into his space again and placed a gentle hand on his cheek.

The simple touch made him flinch but somewhat pulled him out of whatever dark pit he was slowly finding himself in. The warmth from your palm had him leaning into you again as his eyes softened and he stared deep into your pretty eyes, finding himself lost in the concerned look you gave him as you gently ran your thumb across his cheek.

You ran your free hand down his arm and grabbed his hand without breaking eye contact before you carefully massaged your thumb in between his knuckles.

They were simple touches, but the more you did it the more he could slowly feel himself lose the tension locked within his body. As it melted away, he almost let his eyes close from how heavy they got as you gave him a reassuring smile.

“Let yourself take a break. I don’t mind helping.” You told him gently and he sighed as he leaned his forehead against yours.

Simon couldn’t argue with you, not when you touched him so gently and not when you talked to him with enough patience for you both. This was a battle he was going to lose since he wasn’t exactly in the best shape to try to cook anyway, just standing was already taking a lot out of him.

He didn’t say anything as he nodded. He didn’t pull away from you which made you smile as you slowly helped him into a seat at the table. It took him a moment to let go of your hand but he eventually let you go when he reminded himself that you needed to eat.

It was almost surprising how quickly you both fell back into the normal routine that you had set up when he came home. You spoke to him as you cooked, your voice gentle as you talked about what you had done since he was gone and brought him out of his head more than you realized.

He was grateful you weren’t deterred from your usual talk after what you had seen and especially since he barely had enough energy to respond to you like usual. He worried about how he may have ruined your normal life by barging in with his military life, but you didn’t seem to be bothered by it at all. He didn’t deserve that kind of leniency from you and yet he couldn’t help but feel like he was the luckiest man alive to be able to stay in this life of domesticity that felt foreign and familiar to him at the same time.

You made it so easy to fall into it, you made it easy to fall in love with this life that he had never had before. You made him crave it, you made him want it so bad against his better judgment and you made him want you more than he had ever wanted something in his life.

Soon dinner was ready and Simon felt more at ease as you sat across from him. Both of you began to eat and he found that he was staring at you a lot more often than he usually did as it finally set in that he was home and going to be for more than just a few days this time.

“I like your friends.” You said while you ate. “They’re nice.”

“They’re reliable.” He said truthfully and felt some pride knowing that they liked you just as much as you liked them.

“I was worried you were alone when you worked.”

Simon shook his head. He had been used to working alone often before Price had made the task force, and even after he had been in the task force he worked alone, but since Las Almas he had been more open to working with others. His perspective changed because of Johnny, much like how it had changed after the two of you began to grow closer.

Now he couldn’t really see himself working alone. He’d never admit it out loud that he enjoyed the company of his friends, or even that they were his friends, but he realized that working with others was also the reason why he was able to sit in front of you.

If he had been alone on this last mission, he would’ve died since Gaz wouldn’t have been there to save him, and he wouldn’t have been able to come back to you.

You would’ve been left alone, and who knows if anyone would’ve come back to tell you what happened.

Simon felt sick just thinking about that.

“No. We work together often.” He assured you and watched as you gave him a relieved smile.

“Good.”

He grunted and went back to eating. It was strange talking to you about work, he wasn’t sure he really liked it but he preferred these simple and surface level questions over anything else. He would much rather answer your questions about his teammates than any questions about what exactly he does or where he goes. He wasn’t prepared for that and he was sure it would lead to other deeper questions that would bring along far too many old wounds.

You went a little quiet and he glanced up at you. You bit your bottom lip as you stared at your plate, stabbing the food with your fork absentmindedly while you had an unsure look on your face.

Simon swallowed hard. He already knew that you were debating on asking those questions, and he found that it was hard for him to continue to eat. He cleared his throat when he felt it tighten, causing you to look up at him.

When you realized he was staring at you with suspicion you tried to give him a smile.

“So,” You began. “You have dog tags. Why haven’t I seen them before?”

“I take them off before I come home.” He replied shortly with a little more attitude than he had intended, but he could slowly feel irritation build up in his stomach, or perhaps it was fear. All he knew is that it was triggering something in him that told him he needed to either run into his room or shut the conversation down now.

However he couldn’t say anything as you gave him a slow nod. He knew that you were trying to lead up to the real question you wanted to ask but he was dreading the build up as well as trying to guess what you were going to ask.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Simon’s mouth went dry and he gripped his fork so tight that his knuckles turned white. Out of all the questions, this was one he never wanted to answer and he couldn’t believe you were asking him it.

Why did you have to be curious? You shouldn’t ask him these things, you weren’t supposed to know about this.

He glared at his plate and thought that maybe if he stayed quiet you’d just give up but he knew better.

“Simon.” Your voice was still gentle even as he glanced up at you.

“Because…I just didn’t.” He cringed at his answer and felt his stomach drop when your eyebrows knitted together.

He was acting strange, rude, standoffish. He was acting like Ghost, not the Simon that you were used to and yet he couldn’t help but fall back into that side of him as you tried to peek behind the facade, as you began to dig through him into the buried parts of him that were meant to be hidden.

You were searching for things you wouldn’t like, things that would turn you away, things that would make him lose you in ways worse than you leaving him. If you found out what he did, who he dealt with, how could he be sure you’d survive tomorrow? Or the next day?

How could he be sure he wouldn’t find you dead in your room the next time he came home?

“I’m not asking you to tell me what you do.” You explained carefully but he clenched his jaw. “I’m asking why you didn’t tell me. Do you not trust me?”

“I trust you. This isn’t about that.”

“Then what is it about-”

“Stop.”

The moment that the word left his mouth he regretted it especially as he watched you try to make yourself look smaller as you looked away from him. He had never snapped at you, never, not even when the two of you got into those rare arguments. He had never treated you maliciously even when he was upset and yet here he was forcibly shutting you down because of his own issues.

This was familiar, too familiar to a time in his life where he was in your shoes. He could scream right now as his heart went into his ears and he felt his palms start to get sweaty if it weren’t for the fact that he was frozen with fear.

It only got worse when you sat there in silence with a sad look on your face. You weren’t fighting back. You weren’t trying to stand up for yourself and he couldn’t help his mind from racing.

Had you been afraid of him this entire time? Did he make you feel like you had to be careful around him, to walk on eggshells because you were afraid he’d lash out?

Simon felt like there was nothing he could do to fix this but he had to do something, he had to try and he’d beg on his knees for your forgiveness, if he had to.

“I’m sorry.” He practically blurted out as he struggled to look at you. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

“I pushed too hard.” You told him and he shook his head.

“Don’t make excuses for me.”

Simon dared to look up at you and saw that you were giving him a confused look now. He wasn’t exactly able to hide the panic like he normally could, which he blamed because of everything that had happened to him this past twenty-four hours, and it was affecting every thought he had.

Of course you were going to ask him these types of questions, you had every right to especially after his team had shown up. Keeping you in the dark after that, after everything, was wrong and unfair to you because if he wanted to have anything with you he had to be truthful.

“What I do is dangerous.” His voice was low and serious as he stared at you. “I deal with dangerous people. You wouldn’t be safe around me. That’s why.”

Simon held his breath as he waited for you to say something. He watched as you stared at him with a serious expression across your face as you took in his answer. He anticipated you to leave, to run away from the table and to tell him that you never wanted to see him again because who in their right mind would stay with someone so dangerous?

“Okay.” You nodded. “Thank you for telling me.”

He stared at you in disbelief. You were crazy, you had to be, and yet he couldn’t help but feel some relief that you didn’t run or spit in his face. Though, he really wouldn’t blame you for it if you did. He was still waiting for some kind of repercussion for snapping at you.

You probably wouldn’t speak to him for a few days. It would hurt but he was used to far worse treatment and if you were still around then he could deal with it.

“Let’s go to bed.” Your voice was lighter as you offered him a small smile. “I can tell you haven’t slept since this morning.”

Simon’s eyebrows knitted together and he didn’t move from his spot even as you did. All he could do was watch you put your plate in the sink before you looked at him expectantly. He felt like a spotlight had been put on him as you stared at him and he clenched his jaw.

He was waiting for the other shoe to drop. He was waiting for you to disappear, to give him some sort of passive aggressive remark and leave him alone for a few days but instead you were waiting patiently for him to stand up from the table.

“If you want me to carry you, you just have to ask.” You teased but your face fell when he didn’t play along.

You stared at each other, your eyes bouncing around his face as you studied it for a long moment before he saw sadness creep up into them. He watched as your shoulders slumped and he tensed up when you stepped closer to him. He was still waiting, he was still preparing himself for you to say something to hurt him back

It took only a few moments for you to somewhat connect the dots, to see that he was anticipating something bad from you and you couldn’t help the ache in your heart.

Yes, you were hurt that he snapped at you but you were more hurt over the fact that he thought that this once instance had caused something between you. You were baffled by his unwillingness to give himself some grace after all that he had been through.

“Simon, I forgive you.” You told him with a gentle voice but a serious look on your face. “It’s okay.”

It couldn’t be that easy, even when it was you. You were just saying that, you were just trying to make him feel better when you shouldn’t. It wasn’t your responsibility to fix his mistakes.

Simon swallowed hard and forced himself to loosen up despite the fact that he couldn’t accept your forgiveness. Not yet, not until he made it up to you.

He stood up from his chair, hiding any of the soreness he felt, and stood in front of you with weak confidence as he thought back to that night where he called you for the first time while he was away. That was the only way he could make it up to you right now, tomorrow he’d do something different until you had truly forgiven him, even though you already had.

“Let me make it up to you.” His voice was soft, almost pleading, as he leaned into your space.

“You don’t have to.” You stared up at him still with that bit of sadness in your eyes as you placed a gentle hand on his arm which made him involuntarily tense from the contact.

“I want to.”

It was a white lie, because he truly believed he had to, but it didn’t matter as he carefully placed a hand on your hip and pulled you closer to him. His eyes never left yours as he studied your face, waiting for any sign of discomfort before he placed a gentle hand on your face.

He hesitated for only a moment before you wrapped your arms around his neck and he leant down to place a kiss to your lips. He started out slow, barely pressing his lips against yours as he tested the waters to see if this was something that you truly wanted.

When you deepened the kiss, he couldn’t help but let out a sigh as most of the guilt and any thoughts left his mind as you kissed him tenderly. You were calm after a long, horrible nightmare, peace within his mind as you moved your lips against his.

You moved a hand through his hair and he couldn’t help but give out a low resounding hum from his chest as you ran your fingers through his long hair.

Simon tightened his hold on your hips, his fingers digging through your shorts into your skin as he trapped you between him and the counter. He smiled when you let out a surprised squeak and placed his other hand on your other hip, giving them both a teasing squeeze.

He gently bit your bottom lip and stuck his tongue in your mouth when you let him, a fire setting burning in his stomach when you let out a soft, breathless moan. He explored your mouth again, loving the way you lightly tugged on his hair as he pushed your hips against his, purposefully grinding his hard on against you.

Another moan from you as he came into contact with your heat had him kissing you more desperately, chasing the desire to please you and make the past twenty-four hours worth it, to make you feel better, to make up for his mistakes.

He continued to grind his cock against you, grabbing the underside of your leg to get better access to your cloth cunt as he chased the sweet sounds that came out of your mouth.

He trailed kisses from your mouth to your jaw, sucking and licking a spot that had you shivering in his hold. He kissed down your neck, doing the same until you were writhing underneath him as he continued to tease you through your clothes.

“Simon…” You moaned softly and it sent a shiver down his spine, the sound being so much better than he could’ve ever imagined. It made him kiss you more and grind against you even harder. “Your stitches.”

“Don’t care.” He grunted, his mind now set on only one thing, stab wound and pain be damned, all he wanted was you.

“I do…don’t want you to be in pain.”

His grip tightened on you again and he furthered his assault on your neck despite your protests. He could be on his deathbed and he would still fight to make you feel good, he could be ripped apart and he’d still do it. He just wanted you, he wanted you so bad in so many ways that his chest ached at the thought of having to pull back now.

This was the only way he could show you how much he loved you. This was the only way you’d forgive him and love him.

“You’re stubborn.” You breathed out as he rocked his hips against yours.

“I’m fine.” He assured you despite the fact that he felt uncharacteristically out of breath for such a minimal amount of activity.

He ignored it, ignored the feeling like he was going to collapse from exertion and ignored the creeping dull ache that was starting to fall across his entire body. Instead, picked you up with ease without taking his mouth away from your jaw, deciding that he wanted his first time with you to be on your bed.

“Simon!” You squealed as you held onto him tightly.

“Won’t drop you, promise.”

He stared at you with intense desire as he walked you to your room, kicking the door open. By the time he made it to the edge of your bed, his muscles were screaming at him to let you go from the overuse of his already exhausted body.

He managed to have enough strength left to place you on your bed softly before he hovered over you, chest heaving as if he had run a marathon. He could hardly hold his head up as he stared down at you with unfocused eyes as he fought back the extreme dizziness. His skin had paled again as he leaned against the bed for support.

You were out of breath also but for a very different reason and despite your many protests, you stared up at him with desire until you noticed the state he had forced himself into.

“Oh, Simon.” Your voice was full of worry as you stared up at him with knitted eyebrows.

You ran a hand through his hair, softly stroking his face to soothe him and his eyes fluttered shut from the touch. He knew he was in no shape to do anything with you but he couldn’t let go.

“M’fine.” He tried to convince you, dipping his head down to lightly nip at your lips, but you shook your head. “Please.”

He opened his eyes and your breath hitched from the look he gave you through his eyes. Desire, want, need, the only thing stopping him was you and the fact that he could hardly keep himself up.

He pushed himself more on top of you as you squirmed underneath him, giving him a similar look as you fought with yourself. He managed to run a hand across your face and down your neck, gently palming at your covered breast and watched you arched into his touch.

You keened and dug your fingernails into his shoulders, tugging on his hoodie to move him up the bed.

Simon did as you wanted him to, happy that you would let him give this to you, as he continued to run his hands over your body. He let you push him onto the bed beside you and he sunk into the softness of it, nearly finding himself consumed by the comfort of it before he was brought back when you began to kiss his neck.

He grunted and leaned into you, still trying to recover, as you began to run your hands over his body. He jumped when you slipped them under his hoodie, the feeling of your soft hands against his scarred skin had him shivering and biting back a few whines.

You touched him so delicately, so gently as if he deserved that, as if he wasn’t built from being broken apart in every way possible. You had always left soft touches against him but this was entirely, this was much more intimate, much more than just a lingering touch on his arm or shoulder. It made his heart race and his breath hitch in his throat as he felt you kiss under his jaw.

It was too much, this tenderness was too foreign and too much but not enough. He could already feel himself getting addicted to your hands against him, to the burning feeling that you left behind on his skin from every touch you gave him.

He shifted closer to you, wanting to feel more of you against him and involuntarily bucked his hips into yours again, eliciting another one of your sweet moans from your mouth.

He went to kiss you, to run his hands and feel you again when your hand ran across his hard cock.

Simon groaned softly and shifted his hips into your touch as you palmed him through his pants. Pleasure raced up his spine and he started to feel out of breath again as he swallowed any noises that threatened to escape from his mouth. It was just your hand through his pants but the friction was enough to have him rolling his hips into your hand.

He had never felt this good from someone touching him or from touching himself and he couldn’t help but shut his eyes as he gave himself away to the feeling. You had ruined him in more ways than one and he couldn’t be happier.

He ran his hands down your waist, dragging his fingers up your shirt against your hot skin and slipped them past the waistband of your shorts. His fingers were about to part your lips and he felt his stomach flip at the thought, until you pulled away from him entirely.

Simon nearly pouted from your lack of touch and opened his eyes to see you in a beautiful daze. He stared at you unsure of why you stopped but he didn’t try to reach out to you again as you stared at him with intense need while you panted.

“Touch me and I’ll stop.” You shook your head and Simon’s eyebrows knitted together.

He was baffled and for a moment couldn’t say anything as he stared at you and your puffy lips. His eyes raked over the small marks he had left on your neck and he couldn’t help but grab your shirt to tug on it impatiently.

“I want you.”

He saw you shiver and watched as you squeezed your thighs together for just a moment. He clenched his jaw as he stared down at your clothed cunt, just imagining what it would feel like, how wet you were and what you tasted like. He couldn’t help but lick his lips at the thought and he nearly pushed you on your back so he had better access but you gripped his wrist tightly.

“No.” You said softly and the look in your eyes was still gentle. “Not me.”

Simon clenched his jaw and he wanted to argue, wanted to tell you that this shouldn’t be about him, this was supposed to be for you, to make you feel better because of him. He couldn’t let you do this, it was wrong and selfish.

“Let me make it up to you-”

“You don’t have to.” You interrupted him and placed a loving kiss on his lips that stole his breath away.

It was impossible for him to argue because you weren’t relenting with your kisses, you were making his head dizzy and when you palmed him through his pants again, he let out a breathless moan. You made him feel so good with just a simple touch that he could hardly focus on trying to argue with you.

He wanted to return the feeling, the desire and need to make you feel just as good making his grip on your shirt so tight that his knuckles turned white but he couldn’t bear the idea of you pulling away from him again.

You stuck your tongue in his mouth and he kissed you desperately, pushing his hips into your hand again as you gripped the hem of his pants and tugged them down.

He hissed when his hard cock sprung free and bit your lip a little roughly, causing you to gasp before you broke the kiss.

“Shit…” You whispered and Simon followed your wide eyes to his cock which was already leaking pre-cum out of the tip.

He knew that he was a bit larger than most and yet seeing you stare at it with bright eyes full of excitement made his stomach flip. Heat rushed across his face and chest as you wrapped your hand around the base of his cock. A groan escaped his chest as you gave a tentative squeeze, watching as some of the precum dribbled down his shaft. He somehow got impossibly harder as he saw that your hand couldn’t wrap around fully and it made his mind race.

Thoughts of how it’d look inside of you, how he’d probably struggle to get it to fit unless he ate you out like his life depended on it and what you’d look like once it did and how hard you’d squeeze him. He’d do anything to feel more of you right now, to give you the pleasure you wanted from him. If only he hadn’t been stabbed-

All thoughts went out the window as soon as you started to move your hand. Your thumb grazed his tip and spread his pre-cum over his cock causing him to let out an involuntary moan.

You stroked him slowly at first, almost like you were teasing him as you ran your fingers over the prominent veins.

Simon felt light headed as you sped up and the hot pleasure that spread across his abdomen was so intense that he couldn’t help but throw his head back as he gripped you tightly. It was too much and he could already feel himself getting closer even though you had just started.

“F-Fuck…slower.” He groaned out and you began to kiss him across his neck.

You didn’t listen to him as you sucked on his skin and lightly bit him, completely overwhelming his senses as you ran your free hand over his chest again. He was already incredibly sensitive as you treated him so much differently than any other time this has happened to him.

Every sound he made, every time he moved you kept your hands where he wanted them, made his head spin as you pulled out sounds from him that he didn’t even know were possible.

He had considered himself to be quiet in the past but he was being noisy and he thrusted his cock in pace with your hand. He couldn’t help, not when he jolted from the pleasure that was rapidly building up and not when all he could think about is you. You had taken over all of his senses which made it difficult to control the intense pleasure that threatened to spill over.

He was so close already. He was keening and whining for you, the thought of asking you to stop made him want to cry but he wasn’t sure if he had any self control, especially since he was already exhausted and he didn’t want this to end.

“Please…please slow down.” Simon begged breathlessly, his hand grabbing your wrist but he made no effort to stop you.

“Relax.” You whispered into his ear and he whimpered. “I’m not going anywhere.”

You kissed his jaw slowly while you stroked his cock at a fast pace. You snaked your other hand up from his neck and ran your fingers through his hair before you lightly tugged on his hair.

Simon let out a low, guttural grunt as the band of pleasure snapped and hot cum spurted out of his sensitive cock. You stroked him through his orgasm, causing his thighs to start twitching and for him to jolt with pleasure as more moans left his throat. The pleasure was nearly blinding and he felt a warm fuzzy feeling inside his stomach as you continued to stroke him. It almost bordered on too much before you stopped and slowly pulled your hand away from him.

He felt heat rush across his face and entire body as he turned a bright red. He was quick to hide his face in the crook of your neck, panting heavily and still in a daze as embarrassment wracked his body.

Usually he could last for a good bit. He was a trained soldier, he had been in the military for a long time and had enough stamina to be on the field for days without sleep or rest, and yet the moment you had put your hands on him he was about to cum. It had only been minutes, maybe not even five and had already cummed.

He was so embarrassed, even more so than when he had kissed you on his birthday, and if he could hide in his room he could. This was one moment where he wished he had his mask on so you at least couldn’t see his face.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled into your neck. “I didn’t mean to…that was quick.”

You shook your head and somehow managed to pull him off of your neck. You placed a soft kiss on his cheek, looking at him through your lashes as he saw a fire in your eyes, some sort of desire that he had never seen from someone. It was more than want, it was more than need and he felt himself growing harder even as he stared at you while at a loss for words.

You leaned forward and kissed him on the lips tenderly.

The embarrassment slowly left him as he kissed you back, letting you explore his mouth with your tongue as he relaxed into the mattress and into you. He felt like he was on cloud nine in your arms again, especially as you went back to running your hands over his body again while placing little kisses across his face.

No one had ever made him feel this calm, no one had ever made him feel this relaxed. It was more than just the heat of desire and the want for more of that rushing pleasure, this was tenderness that had him feeling safe.

You made him feel safe. You were safety.

If it weren’t for the fact that you were kissing him, he probably would’ve fallen asleep into hopefully a dreamless state where he could enjoy you beside him, but luckily you were still kissing him.

You still wanted him.

Simon wanted to return the favor. He inched his hands to your waist, ready to feel how wet you were and hopefully see what you would look like when he slid his fingers inside of you. He wanted to make you tremble with just his fingers like how you had done for him.

You pulled away from him however leaned your head down to his cock.

His eyes widened and his cock twitched when he felt your hot breath fan across the head of his cock. Heat raced across him as you pushed his hips down on the bed to give you better access to him and he gripped the blanket beneath him as if his life depended on it.

He couldn’t quite believe you were about to give him head and normally he wouldn't complain, but he still had some of that guilt stuck inside of him from earlier.

“You don’t-”

“Someone has to clean up the mess.”

You don’t try to hide the twinkle in your eye as you glance up at his wide eyes. You somehow look innocent yet devilish at the same time and all Simon could think was that you were going to be the death of him.

He left out a long heavy sigh when you ran your tongue from the bottom of his length to the tip. His eyes were stuck on yours as you gave his cock kittens lick, taking the cum into your mouth before you wrapped your fingers around him again. A strangled moan left his throat as you slowly began to stroke him again as you left small kisses all over him, purposefully avoiding the tip as you cleaned him up.

Simon became a panting mess as you tease him. He looked down at you with lidded eyes as you continued to work him up slower than before all while staring at him with heated eyes. He bucked his hips to try to get more friction but you placed a hand on his pelvis and pushed him down.

“Stop teasing…” He groaned and you smiled.

You gave him a few more kisses before you wrapped your lips around his sensitive tip, your hot wet mouth causing a short circuit within his mind.

He moaned loudly as your tongue worked against him and his hand shot to the back of your head. He didn’t push you down but somehow holding you was enough to ground him as you slowly sunk your mouth further down onto his cock. It felt like all of the air in his lungs had been knocked out as he felt your tongue run over the veins on his cock.

You tried to sink further. He grunted when he felt the tip of his cock hit the back of your throat and nearly came again when you gagged around him. He tugged on your hair to stop you, luckily you listened to him this time before you hollowed out your cheeks and began to bob your head up and down.

Simon threw his head back as you began to suck. He felt himself flush from the wet sounds of you taking in your mouth and he writhed against you, trying his hardest to not buck his hips into you as you stroked the parts of him you couldn’t reach.

He was still sensitive from his last orgasm but this felt so much more than overstimulation. Electricity raced through his body and his muscles twitched as you bobbed your head faster, your eyes never leaving his. The feeling was too much and he tightened his grip in your hair when you hummed, his eyes fluttering shut from the extra stimulation.

A string of incoherent words left his mouth, he could hardly think to even say anything as you sucked his cock as if your life depended on it. Pleasure built up inside of him quickly and he let out whimpers the more you continued but he was beyond caring.

He was lost in the pleasure, lost in the feeling of your mouth, lost in the feeling of you.

Before long he was close again and when you swiped your tongue across his slit, his hips bucked involuntarily, causing you to gag. He apologized to you, barely above a breathless mumble but you only hummed, which caused him to do it again, and stared up at him with tears in your eyes.

You sped up and he let out a string of curses, unable to control whatever escaped his mouth.

“Gonna…” His voice got stuck in his throat and that was the only warning you got as his hot cum seeped into your mouth.

Simon’s eyes rolled back and he let out a low groan. He could hardly catch his breath as he felt you swallow everything that was given to you. His legs shook underneath you as you ran your hands down them soothingly, helping him come down from his intense orgasm while you kept your mouth on his.

His chest heaved up and down while extreme exhaustion hit over him. He could hardly open his eyes to watch you release his cock from your mouth and pull his pants back up. He felt so incredibly tired but he wasn’t ready to fall asleep.

He removed his hand from the back of your head and grabbed your wristing, using the last of his strength to pull you up to him before he smashed his lips against yours.

The kiss was sloppy and he could taste himself on your tongue which made him hold onto you even tighter. He breathed heavily into your mouth as you gripped his hoodie and gently pushed him further into the mattress.

When you both broke apart, he stared up at you with sleepy eyes as you placed a hand on his cheek. He felt a smile spread across his face that you mirrored before you settled next to him, wrapping your arms carefully around his abdomen to make sure you didn’t touch his wound.

The only thing on Simon’s mind as he drifted off to sleep was how loving you looked at him and how safe you made him feel.

Link to part 7

A/N: Alternatively, you meet the family and Price has a Proud Dad moment tm also this is my first time writing a bj scene so bare with me

The tag list is closed!! I am so happy that so many of you want to be tagged for this story but I will not be accepting anymore requests to tag people in this series since this list has gotten long and it's hard to keep track of how many I have to add! Sorry for the inconvenience!

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@kat-nee @alexwashere82 @suicidal-marshmellow @shuttlelauncher81 @poohkie90 @reiya-djarin @k4marina @mionacaped @igotmajordaddyissues @xxghostyx @pasta-m1lk @imstargazing @jacksonpleasestopkillingme @kgive @konig-is-bbygrl @lialacleaf @frazie99 @gremlin-ghuleh @spencerreidisbae123 @alastorhazbin @writingmysanity @lillianastuff @alastorhazbin @reid490 @lockleywife @sheepsel @dead-noodles @marshmallowtraver @sinclairbrosbathmat @sofasoap @crazyfandomist @iwmtfm @oiiviagrande @genesis1363 @revyjerry @guttabutta00 @greenkiki @d4z01 @quietlyignoringyou @mysticalgalaxysalad @almightywdm @maviee @lycheedr3ams @multitargaryen @fruitymoonbeams-blog @lilpothoscuttings @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction @adriennepoison

#simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x you #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #cod ghost x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #mw2 ghost #ghost mw2 #cod ghost #the roommate series

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thranduel · 8 months

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some thoughts about astarion because i'm tired of the internet reducing him to one thing

when bg3 came out in early access, astarion was always seen as the extremely flirty, confident guy who enjoyed sex (or so we thought) and spoke about it like it was his favourite thing. he was also kinda marketed as the “sexy vampire”, so you can understand why many people saw him that way based on the little amount of content we had. even while playing act 1 and act 2, many players still might think of him like that because he does have a very charismatic personality and he asks to sleep with you very early on, so it just automatically makes you think he’s genuinely happy doing that and being totally serious.

BUT!!!!!!! we end up finding out later on that’s NOT the case and it was all part of a plan to seduce us in order for him to gain protection. he opens up about his past and his trauma and how he was forced to use his body to lure people back to cazador. he struggles with intimacy and relationships in general because of this. that’s why i really hope that people stop reducing him to “hot sexy vampire that loves flirting and having sex with everyone” when that is not who he is, he’s literally traumatised because of sex due to being forced into it and he’s slowly trying to heal. he’s also so much more than just “the hot vampire”, ya know? if you actually put in the effort to get to know him, you will see who he truly is underneath and he has many loveable traits to appreciate.

you may not see the “soft” side of him very often because he hides it, but it’s there!! one thing i noticed that really stood out to me was that when i gave food to an orphan in act 3 and he approved. back when you first met him, he probably would’ve done the opposite or had no reaction at all. i also saw a clip of someone trying to romance karlach and astarion and he literally told tav to choose karlach over him because he can see that karlach loves her. he said normally an arrangement would work for him but after everything karlach has been through, he doesn’t want to get in the way or see her hurt. letting tav go is also hard for him as well but he still thought about someone else. he could’ve whined or been possessive or jealous but he didn’t do that at all. where are all those people who reduce astarion to “the guy that flirts and sleeps with everyone” now? seriously. that’s not what he does, and when he was forced into it by cazador, he was trying to survive, he didn’t do it for his own pleasure. it’s not a “hot” personality trait of his, it’s literally trauma. and because he did it so much, he got used to it, and that resulted in him disassociating and feeling empty.

apparently if you ask him to join you and sleep with the drows at the brothel (something i will never make him do in my playthroughs), he only says yes because he struggles to say no. but he disassociates. and if you’re in a high approval relationship with him and he loves you, he will feel safe enough to express his feelings and say he’s not comfortable. this happens before you fight cazador. i’m not sure if he gives the same response after, but either way, if he joins in, he will always disassociate and it’s not something he wants to do despite what he may say.

that being said, it’s obviously still okay to appreciate his beauty and attractiveness, because he is very beautiful. he appreciates it and even likes being called beautiful. calling him “hot” and “sexy” isn’t a bad thing either, we know he can be and i'm sure he knows it too! it’s just annoying when people act like that’s ALL he is and they don’t even mention anything else about his character. the love scenes are beautifully done too (i personally prefer the second one after you’ve stopped him from doing the ritual, because that’s the one where he decided he truly wanted it and felt safe and comfortable because he genuinely loves you), and i actually would’ve been fine if they didn’t have any scenes like that at all because it’s totally understandable and valid if he didn’t feel comfortable, but i just hope that people don’t take things too far and over-sexualise him just because of how he appeared to be in the first half of the game and the way he’s often marketed on social media. and yes i know he’s fictional and nothing on the internet is going to hurt his feelings!!!! it’s more about the fact that he canonically has sexual trauma and many people still say really disturbing stuff even AFTER they find out about that, and it just makes me uncomfortable to think that people are okay with treating someone like a sexual object especially when they've said they're traumatised and it makes them uncomfortable. idk if this makes sense 😭

but yeah he doesn't want to flirt and sleep with everyone as i've seen people claim. and if in an alternate universe he did, and he did it on his OWN terms, and the other people he had relationships with enjoyed it too, then good for them! absolutely nothing wrong with that if there's consent, respect and honesty. however, that's not the case with what happened with astarion, because 1. he was forced into using his body WHEN HE DID NOT WANT TO and 2. he misled people and lured them to a miserable fate. it's so horrible and devastating for everyone involved. sex was never something fun for him, and it certainly isn't a "personality trait" of his. it was a survival tactic. he was forced to. he didn’t want to.

obviously when he becomes more comfortable, then it's totally understandable to get excited when he flirts and shows physical affection. he can be so charming, funny, sweet and romantic and i love that. it’s so beautiful to see him heal, genuinely find comfort in someone for the first time and experience intimacy that he feels ready and comfortable for. he deserves to love and be loved on his own terms instead of being forced. but again, he is so much more than the guy we were introduced to at the beginning. the internet just sees one thing and sticks with it but i really hope people start to actually appreciate him for who he is and the complexity of his character.

aaaaand i just had to leave this here <3

#astarion #baldur’s gate 3 #bg3 #sorry for rambling i’ve just been very emotional about him recently 😭#also i hope people remember that even if he NEVER EVER wanted to have sex again he is 100% valid #he does not have to change or force himself to feel a certain way #especially after everything he’s been through #and if you think he does then you’re gross. he doesn’t owe anyone ANYTHING #anyways #when he kept apologising for not sleeping with tav i wanted to cry #there is literally a scene where if you tell him halsin is interested in you he says it’s ok to go to him #but then he gets concerned and asks if it’s because he hasn’t slept with you for a while #and i wanted to cry #he should NEVER have to feel guilty for that #honestly the only reason why i think he might eventually feel comfortable with sex again is because ->#in act 3 after his genuine love confession after you help him defeat cazador he initiates it himself #and it feels like it’s something he truly wants after developing a strong emotional bond with someone for the first time #and i think that’s really beautiful that he chose to do it on his own terms when he felt ready #but also #for a while i wasn’t sure if he was repulsed and uncomfortable by sex in general and hated it entirely #or if he only feels comfortable after he develops a strong emotional bond #the only reason i think the second one now is because of what happened in act 3 #but regardless whatever it is i just want him to feel safe and comfortable and happy #my posts

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samgirl98 · 8 months

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Forgotten Demon Twin 3/?

Prev | Next

Danny meets the Batfam. He almost gets what he wants

So, apparently, COVID and lack of sleep really get my creative juices going. Enjoy this next chapter.

Danny followed Damian with a distance between them. He had left the wakizashi behind but had hidden a few non-poisoned needles up his sleeve.

He studied his twin’s body language.

Damian seemed open, if a bit tense. He kept his posture non-threatening, probably to take Danny off-guard. Danny could hear the chatter in Damian’s comm. No doubt his father and other so-called siblings.

(Danny only had one sister, and she was asleep at home.)

They ended up in the park at three in the morning.

Danny wished he could put all this behind him and sleep. As always, though, his needs weren’t considered.

Danny could see the small group of people semi-hiding in the shadows with his enhanced senses. They all looked up when they heard Damian and Danny walk up to them. All of them got defensive when they saw Danny, though they tried to be subtle about it.

“Father, meet Danyal. Danyal, meet father and everyone else.”

“Boo, you suck! Introduce us, brat,” a man with white and black hair (who reeked of death, but who was he to judge) said.

“Seriously, you little demon, that’s your introduction,” a sleep-deprived teenager asked. (Honestly, sleep deprivation was such a mood.)

“Baby bat, how could you,” a blue-eyed young man asked. (Actually, a lot of the boys had blue eyes and black hair.)

The rest of the group started berating Damian for his introduction.

Danny was stunned. If anyone had even thought about doing that to Damian while in the League, they would’ve ended up with a sword through their chest. Here, these people were treating Damian like a snot-nosed younger brother…and he was letting them.

“Children,” the older man yelled out, “Enough!”

(An older man was haunting Bruce Wayne, but Danny ignored the man dressed as a butler. It wasn’t his business.)

Damian’s face got smug as everyone else quieted down. Some of them (the eldest among them) started pouting.

The older man, Bruce Wayne, walked up to Danny and held out his hand. Danny stared at it for a second before shaking it.

“It’s good to meet you, Danyal.”

“Danny, but you already knew that, didn’t you, Mr. Wayne?”

“Please, in that same vein, call me Bruce. And, yes, I have done a little bit of research before coming here.”

“Hn,” Danny hummed out.

“Great, another non-talkative one,” someone murmured.

Danny looked at the group and noticed that the sleep-deprived teenager suddenly seemed very alert with his calculating, narrowed eyes. Hmm, he would have to keep an eye on that one; he seemed like the most dangerous one. Not physically, but intelligent wise…well, Danny has learned to fear smart people.

He let go of Mr. Wayne—Bruce’s hand. (The older man following Bruce smiled gently at Danny.)

“So, to what do I owe this…unexpected pleasure,” Danny asked.

Everyone turned to look at Damian. The Heir seemed to be, was that embarrassment?

“Yeah, Demon Spawn, why don’t you tell Danny why we’re here?”

“Fuck off, Todd,” Damian hissed out.

Todd grinned. (The butler—he had to be a butler—frowned at Todd’s cussing.)

Bruce sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, “Children, please, not before introductions.”

“Yeah, B is right. Anyway, my name is Dick,” the eldest said. He got Danny’s hand and shook it.

“On purpose,” Danny asked.

Dick laughed good naturally.

“My parents weren’t from the US and didn’t know the word's second meaning. By the time I found out, I was attached to my nickname.”

The one who stunk of death spoke next.

“Name’s Jason. I’m the second,” he was interrupted by the petite Asian girl.

“Ahem.”

“I mean, I’m the third oldest.”

“Hello. Cassandra Cain. The second eldest. And you’re my new baby brother!”

Danny blinked, “Cassandra Cain? As in the ‘One Who is All’?”

The girl nodded while giving a thumbs-up. Danny gulped. He was so screwed.

“Tt, she’s not that impressive.”

Danny gave Damian a skeptical look for the first time in his life.

“Hi, I’m Duke Thomas. Why is your aura so weird?”

Danny blinked at the random question.

“Don’t know, dude, radioactive chemicals, maybe?”

Everyone stared at him with a look of horror.

“I’m joking.”

“Oh, hah,” Duke laughed, uncomfortable.

“Tim Drake,” sleep-deprived teenager said without adding anything else—honestly, mood.

“Of course, father already introduced himself, and you know who I am,” Damian said. He always had to have the last word, huh?

The ghost spoke last (not that anyone else would know.), “I’m Alfred Pennyworth. I know you can see me, Master Danny. It is a pleasure to meet you, even if it is after my death.”

Danny ignored the ghost.

“Great. Now, back to my original question: why are you guys here? If the League is gone, why bother with the unneeded spare?”

Everyone, minus the ghost, shifted uncomfortably. Even Damian. Danny narrowed his eyes; something big was going to happen.

“Danny,” Bruce started, “we found out about you recently—”

“Yeah, very recently,” Jason said.

“—and we wanted to meet you. We—I needed to make sure you were fine. I missed so much and could not protect you due to my lack of knowledge of your existence. I want to know if you need any help, and if you don’t, I’ll be here whenever you need it.”

Danny let Bruce’s words sink in. It didn’t take long for him to put the puzzle pieces together.

“Talia never mentioned me, did she?”

He turned to Damian, “Neither did you.”

Damian looked down at his feet, looking ashamed. Danny narrowed his eyes.

Too little, too late, brother.

Danny took a deep breath.

Here I go. It’s time to sell it.

“Look, I appreciate you checking on me, but I’m fine. I have a loving family and an awesome older sister. All of my friends are here. Amity Park is my home. I don’t want to leave. Please, I was never able to ask anything for myself. I'm asking now, begging, let me stay in Amity.”

“I have looked into the Fentons and have read some disturbing things,” Bruce said.

“What, the weapons? They can’t harm humans.”

They didn’t need to know Danny wasn’t fully human anymore.

“Not only that but a portal to the afterlife.”

“So my parents are a bit eccentric. If it makes you feel better, I can give you a full, unabridged copy of their work,” Danny lied. No way in the Infinite Realms Danny would give the freaking Batman more ammunition to take Danny away.

The ghost butler frowned at Danny’s lies and gave him a look of disappointment. Hah! The jokes on him that didn’t work on Danny.

“What about the reports of these so-called ghost attacks?”

Danny waved off the man’s concerns, “They rarely happen, and when they do, we have our own hero who takes care of it.”

Bruce gave him a calculating look. Cassandra was whispering in Tim’s ear. While she spoke, Tim started narrowing his eyes at Danny. Dammit, this was why he hated intelligent people. Danny was a decent liar, but he couldn’t come up with something if there were more than one detective.

Not to mention, he heard rumors about Cassandra’s abilities.

Time to bring out the sob story.

“Please, I don’t want to leave the only family I have ever known.”

Bruce narrowed his gaze. Bruce felt the boy was hiding something. He’d have to ask Cass what she saw.

“Maybe we should let him stay, B. We can always keep in touch, can’t we, little D?”

Danny nodded vigorously. Bruce almost gave in, but he had to ask.

“What about the report of the city being pulled into an alternate dimension? The Justice League hadn’t heard about this, and I know you know that I’m Batman. You could’ve reached out whenever to let us know.”

“I don’t know. It didn’t occur to me. The threat wasn’t that bad. There were just a few more ghosts than usual. Besides, other cities have seen stuff like this. We have two heroes, and the citizens got together to fight the threat.”

“So, there was a threat.”

“Listen, dude, I’m not here to assuage your guilt. I want to stay with my family. I deserve that much, at least, right?”

Danny refused to break eye contact first. He stared down the Batman; he knew the man wouldn’t kill his family, so he felt confident asking for what he wanted. After a few moments, Bruce sighed. Danny knew he had won.

“Young man, you should really tell your father the truth.”

Danny ignored Alfred. He wasn’t the boss of him.

“Okay, I’ll choose to believe you,” Bruce took a card out, “but if anything happens, and I mean anything, don’t hesitate to call me.”

Danny had almost been home free. A few more minutes, hell, seconds, and he would’ve gotten away with his lies and well-crafted half-truths.

Of course, that’s when everything went to shit.

Danny’s ghost sense went off. Bruce’s gaze narrowed, and Tim asked, “What was that?”

Before he could come up with a lie, he heard him. Fucking Skulker.

“I’ll have your skin, whelp,” he shouted and fired.

Danny didn’t think. He transformed and put up a shield around the group.

It didn’t even take Danny 10 seconds. He took out his anger on the so-called hunter and sucked him up in the thermos. He was going to get a month of soup time, at least!

Danny turned toward the stunned group.

“Um, surprise?” He said while giving jazz hands.

Bruce’s eyes narrowed in anger, “Well, Phantom, is there anything you’d like to say?”

“This is why honesty is the best policy, young sir.”

“Um, you’re all dreaming?”

Bruce crossed his arms.

“Really, Danyal? You thought that would work?” Damian asked, angry.

Tim was looking at him with triumph in his gaze. Dick looked disappointed, and Jason looked entrance by Danny’s predicament. Cass was shaking her head, and Duke was, weirdly enough, blocking his eyes.

Fucking Skulker, man.

“I think it’s time you told us the truth.”

Make that two months of soup time.

Danny sighed and hovered in the air, crossing his legs. He might as well get comfortable.

Yay, Alfred has appeared. Danny was a bit rude, but considering what Damian did to him when they first met, I think Danny was being downright pleasant

Danny: Lying through his teeth.

Tim: This little bastard isn't telling us everything.

Danny: Gets caught in the lie.

Tim: Ha! I knew it. Once a demon always a demon

yeah, Tim is a bit prejudiced, not that we should completely blame him after what Damian did to him

#Forgotten Demon Twin #dc x dp #dp x dc

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suzukiblu · 5 months

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Day twenty-six of fic NaNoWriMo, obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon AU.

Kon takes the bag, then peeks inside it with a puzzled little frown. Tim, again, makes a note to buy him more stuff. Kon is gonna expect presents every time he sees him, by the time he’s done with him. Because Kon deserves nice things and also–well–

Well, actually . . . okay, it’s not actually going to be necessary for Tim to get Kon a present every single time he sees him, admittedly, just . . . well. He wants to, he guesses. Wants Kon to feel valued for once in his fucking life, since as far as he can tell no one has ever actually gone to any effort whatsoever to make him feel like that. Like–ever. Not even once.

If Tim maybe spoils him a little in the process, well–that’s only balancing out the bullshit, isn’t it?

“Oh,” Kon says, his eyes widening a little in surprise before he frowns in confusion. Tim continues to notice the eyeliner. It’s just a little bit smudged, like maybe Kon’s still learning how to do it right, and it’s also low-key triggering an emotional crisis in Tim’s entire fucking everything, to be honest. “What's . . .?”

“I mean, it’s a couple of things?” Tim says, suddenly feeling incredibly awkward about his gifting decisions. Choices. Choicisions. “I don’t know if it’s very, uh, romantic, but . . .”

“‘Romantic’,” Kon repeats in the exact same awkward way he did “flowers”. Tim only doesn’t curl up and die by sheer force of will.

“Yeah,” he says. Kon stares at him for a long, intent moment, then looks back down into the bag and pulls out the fat little plastic bag of Hawaiian-import gummy candies on top of it. Tim will take any excuse to get calories into him at this point, even if it’s just candy. Chocolates probably would’ve been more date-appropriate, but when he was looking for popular Hawaiian candies, these ones kept coming up.

“I haven’t seen this brand in months,” Kon says, looking bewildered. “I didn’t even know they sold it on the mainland.”

“They do not,” Tim says, trying not to look embarrassed. “I ordered it online.”

And also paid for expedited shipping to make sure it’d get here on time.

“Oh,” Kon says, his cheeks turning just a little pink as he ducks his head and smiles again. Then he glances back down into the bag with a puzzled little frown and tilts his head. “. . . is that a Switch case? What’s that for?”

“Because there was too much packaging to make you lug around all night but putting a loose Switch in there seemed like a bad idea,” Tim replies reasonably. It’s the Lite, because he still doesn’t know if Kon has either a TV or any real space for one in his room, so Kon can’t possibly worry about it being too expensive like he did with the phones. And even if it weren’t the Lite, it’s still not the OLED, so he thinks he’s doing a great job with the self-restraint, personally.

“You got me a Switch?” Kon says. Tim continues to not know how to explain how much money he intends to spend on him, so just shrugs.

“Just the Lite. I got you the turquoise, since it doesn't come in green. And an online subscription, so we can play together,” he says. He hasn’t dug his own Switch out in a few months–too much else to do–but he figures if doing that gets Kon to accept the gift and gets him closer to apartment/cul-de-sac territory, it’s not exactly a burden. “I wasn’t sure what kind of games you were into, so I got a few different ones. They’re all in the case, it’s got interior pockets.”

“I–you–” Kon fumbles a little, then turns red again. “You really wanna play together?”

Tim wants to throw a lot of people off a lot of roofs. Hard. Just so hard.

“Yeah,” he says. “Of course I do.”

Kon gets even redder and shoves the candy back in the bag, looking away.

“Thanks. That'd be, um–cool,” he says. “Uh–ready to go?”

“Uh, there's one more thing in there, actually,” Tim admits, a little embarrassed by said thing but also not wanting Kon to miss it and accidentally throw it away later. It's silly, but . . . he doesn't know, he'd just thought it was kind of cute or whatever.

Maybe “cute” isn't really a Kon thing, but he seemed to like the goat okay, so . . .

“There is?” Kon peers back into the bag, then digs in through the tissue paper with a curious frown. “What's–oh. Huh.”

He pulls out the chunky little plastic figure at the bottom of the bag and blinks at it. It's a Superboy toy, not because Tim was deliberately looking for a Superboy toy to give him but because the coincidence when he'd tripped over it had just seemed–fortuitous, he doesn't know.

“It's a Duplo toy,” Tim supplies. “I mean, it was licensed so I assume you got paid for it at some point, but the set it's from came out while you were off-grid and I don't know how much your manager ever kept you in the loop on those things anyway, plus you said you didn't know what Duplo even was so when I found it I figured you didn't have one. The actual set came with, like, a few different hero characters, but it's sold out and I don't think they've done another run. I just found that little guy being sold solo on eBay.”

“You got me a toy of myself?” Kon asks, giving him a wry look.

“Superman's looked stupid,” Tim lies, because he would sooner burn his wallet than buy Superman merch at this point, never mind that he knows the money all goes to either various accredited charities or the Justice League. “Though I guess Supergirl's or Steel's would've been okay. I don't really know how close you are to them, though.”

“I would say ‘not at all', probably,” Kon says, turning over the toy in his hand and peering more closely at it. “‘Duplo'? So like . . . the kid toys you were talking about at the museum?”

“Um, yeah,” Tim says. “I mean, you don't really own any childhood stuff, right, so . . . I don't know, I figured why not?”

“You're a Gothamite, man, you should've gotten me Bat toys,” Kon says, ducking his head with another smile. “Batman wouldn’t approve.”

“Batman's just an urban legend,” Tim pretends to believe. Kon laughs.

“Please, that's just what you guys say to cops and tourists,” he teases.

“I can neither confirm nor deny that statement,” Tim says. “Or make any comments on how incredibly inaccurate any nonspecific bat-themed superhero toys that've been commercially produced may or may not be.”

“Oh yeah?” Kon asks, laughing again. It's that still-unfamiliar bright laugh that Robin's never gotten out of him, and Tim feels some very weird ways about it. Like. Several very weird ways. Many very weird ways. So many.

Fuck, he's in deep here. But that's not news, so whatever. If Tim had ever once in his life gone to any effort whatsoever to avoid trouble he wouldn't be Robin and Bruce would be an even more vengeful and unhappy asshole who never talked to Dick and probably the Joker would be dead, which would admittedly be a single specific improvement but otherwise would suck. Like, really suck.

Tim is gonna be a supervillain someday, yeah, but that's a rational decision that he's deliberately making, not a “driven by personal trauma and tragedy” grief response. And Bruce would be absolutely miserable as a supervillain, anyway, plus he'd never be able to convince Dick to go for it and then Dick would have to fight him and it'd be awful and Alfred would never make any of them post-patrol cookies again, which would immediately make this the worst possible timeline. And then someone would have to go trick the Flash into fixing it all and–look, it'd just be very complicated and unnecessary. So being Robin is just a better idea all around, really, and also saves the timeline from any speedsters happening to it.

Again.

“I just thought it was cute, I don’t know,” Tim says. “He’s got his little earring and leather jacket and stupid smirk, what can I say, I was endeared.”

“‘Endeared’, huh?” Kon says with a grin, holding the little figure against his chest.

“Oh, downright smitten,” Tim deadpans. Kon laughs again.

“Nerd,” he says in obvious and unexpectedly fond amusement, which reminds Tim of him telling him to kiss him in the department store changing room and gives him a little bit of that whole cliché “butterflies in the stomach” rush. Or possibly batarangs, from how they feel. They might be batarangs. He forces himself to not look weird or sappy and just shrugs.

“Maybe,” he says. “Anyway. Now I’m ready to go.”

“Where are we going?” Kon asks curiously, and Tim smiles at him.

“Somewhere nice, like I promised,” he says. Kon snorts, but doesn’t do anything to hide his own pleased smile.

“Sure, whatever,” he says as he drops the Duplo figure back into the gift bag, still smiling. “Keep your secrets and lead the way, babe.”

“I can do that,” Tim says, and then reaches out and catches Kon’s free hand to hold while they walk, lacing their fingers together. Kon turns red again and really smiles at him. His hand still feels too-soft and immeasurably strong, even though Tim knows for a fact that the TTK does more heavy lifting than Kon’s actual muscles do, or even can. No matter how the Kryptonian physiology is or isn’t coming in, the TTK is always gonna be stronger, Tim’s pretty sure. It’s not like it’s not going to get enhanced by the yellow sunlight absorption and the process of Kon’s physical maturation too, after all.

But anyway, more importantly, he finally came up with a date idea he thinks Kon might like, so . . .

Well, if Kon doesn’t like it, there’s backup ideas. But–he thinks Kon might like it, at least. It’s kind of weird, but so is Kon and so is he and so are their lives, and also there’ll be a gift shop to buy him stuff at.

Tim is going to buy out that gift shop if Kon actually likes this date.

Once Kon's done making fun of him, anyway, which he is definitely gonna do when he realizes what Tim is about to use a fake ID to do.

. . . maybe he can just pretend to be eighteen, actually. Kon never did read that report he wrote up for him; he doesn't have any way to know how old he actually is.

Eh, no, that's too weird and also would be annoying to remember without an associated cover. Fuck it, Tim will just live with the teasing, he guesses.

#timkon #tim drake #kon el #conner kent #dc robin #superboy #young just us #young justice #rinfic #long post #wip: obligatory sugar baby kon

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estrellami-1 · 3 months

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If I Should Stay

Part 1 | . . . | Part 51 | Part 52 | Part 53

“You wish,” Steve teases, then looks wide-eyed at Robin. “What about all the pictures we have?”

“We’ll take new ones,” she assures him, then grins. “And hey, maybe Starcourt will be built, without the Russian base underneath.”

Steve hums. “Maybe then I could avoid one of the concussions from Billy.”

Robin freezes suddenly. “Steve,” she says, “is it a good idea for the party to meet Max? Because of the first concussion from Billy? That wasn’t Upside Down related, was it?”

Steve grimaces. “He’d been Flayed at that point, yeah. Even if he is a racist asshole, I can’t imagine him coming after us like that again.”

Robin hums. “But if he does-”

“Tell me,” Eddie says suddenly, “does he like Mary Jane? Because I can make sure he never sees her again if he goes after Steve.”

Robin blinks at him, then begins to grin. “Sorry, Stevie, Eddie’s my new favorite.”

Eddie laughs and fist-bumps her. “Likewise, Birdie.”

“Hey!” Steve says, faux-affronted. It’s ruined by the grin he can’t hide.

El pokes gently at Steve’s arm, then the waffle iron when he looks at her. “It’s done.”

“Ah,” he says, opening it. “Thank you, Ellie. Mind getting me a plate?” He grins at her. “Without grabbing it?”

El grins. Without moving, she opens a cabinet, floats a plate out to Steve, then shuts the cabinet again. She wipes underneath her nose, then grins at Steve. “No blood!”

“That’s great!” He celebrates with her, offering her a high-five. “You think you’re ready?”

“I’m still scared,” she tells him. “But yes. I do.”

“Y’know something else?” Steve asks. “Vecna needed four more years to be strong enough to do what he did. You needed two more days. I think you’re much stronger than he is right now.”

“Speaking of the big bad,” Eddie interjects, nibbling on a corner of his waffle, “shouldn’t we go over the plan?”

Steve sighs. “Probably,” he agrees.

“I think we should wait for everyone,” Alli says. “Let’s just have as normal a morning as we can for right now.”

Steve smiles at his sister. “Sure, Al,” he says, then rolls his eyes when she pulls him into a hug and ruffles his hair.

“Love you, Bubba,” she murmurs into his ear, and he can’t help but to melt into her hug.

“Love you too, Al,” he murmurs back, then grins at her. “How about grilled cheese when we all make it outta this intact?”

“I think that sounds like an excellent idea,” she nods, then steps away. “I’m gonna call Cass. Come and get me when everyone’s here?”

“Will do,” he nods, and she smiles in response as she walks off.

Eddie pulls his feet up onto the counter he’s sitting on, looping his arms around his knees. “So, Cassidy is Alli’s-?”

“Girlfriend,” Steve nods. He takes another waffle out of the iron and scrapes the last of the batter into it. “It makes me wonder how I would’ve ended up, if I had her the entire time, y’know? Cause I know I was an asshole. And I’m trying not to be anymore.”

“You’re succeeding,” both Robin and Eddie say at the same time, then excitedly point at each other.

Steve laughs and shakes his head. “Thanks. But I wonder, if I’d had her the entire time, would I have ever gotten as bad as I did? Would I have ever worked at Scoops or Family Video and met you, Robin? Would any of his have ever happened in the first place?”

He only notices his hand is shaking when Robin gently takes his fork and puts it down, then grabs both his hands in hers. “Squeeze,” she requests, and he does, letting out a harsh breath and resting their foreheads together.

“Sorry,” he mutters.

“Shuddup,” Robin says. He laughs.

After a few seconds, he pulls away to look at her. “Am I being crazy?”

“I think you’re being exactly as sane as taking this mission in the first place makes either of us, Dingus, I don’t think either of us were all there in the first place.”

Steve giggles. “I think you may be right.”

“Maybe you would’ve been different,” Eddie says. He’s taking the last waffle out of the iron. “Maybe you wouldn’t have. Maybe all of this would’ve happened, and maybe it wouldn’t have. Maybes aren’t gonna change anything that’s currently happening. All we can do is our best to get through it.”

El slips between Steve and Robin and wraps her arms around Steve’s waist. “I can do things you can’t,” she says quietly. “But I can’t see the future. I don’t know what could’ve happened. But I know I’m glad that you’re here now.”

Steve sighs contentedly and wraps her in his arms. “Me too.”

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#stranger things #if I should stay #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #el hopper #platonic stobin #el and Steve are siblings #steve has a long-needed mental breakdown #he deserves it honestly #fix it #fix it fic #time travel #time travel fic #time travel fix it #time travel fix it fic #starambles

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ilguna · 1 year

Text

☼ the rescue (Rick Grimes) ☼

summary; you were the first one to find Judith during the fall of the prison, making it your responsibility to get her back to Rick, safe and sound.

warnings; swearing, death, death mention, gore.

wc; 4.6k

NOTES; season 4/5 spoilers, read at your own risk.

–

For the record, if you’d known exactly how limited your stay at the prison was going to be, you would’ve done a few things differently. For example, you might’ve packed an easily accessible emergency bag with supplies that would put you ahead a week. You would’ve been on your toes, waiting for the clue of the inevitable. You might’ve been a bit more cautious on what you did throughout your day.

In fact, you probably would’ve realized that your group was going to be attacked by the governor on the same day that Hershel and Michonne went missing for an hour more than what was planned. Which you noticed, but no one else seemed to be worried about. They kept telling you that they might’ve run into a few problems out there, like starting the fire to burn the bodies.

Well, their disappearance led right to the whole prison being destroyed by an army with tanks and grenades, which led to being overrun by walkers and virtually inhabitable. You would never be able to go inside that building ever again and say that you felt safe enough to sleep there. The governor ruined your lives yet again.

The more you look back at it, the angrier you get because of it. You would’ve done so many things differently that day. Especially now that you know that you would be the first person to find Judith, and leaving her behind was completely out of the question. You weren’t prepared to take care of a baby you barely knew on the road, with absolutely no clue on how to keep you both safe without prioritizing one person’s needs over the other.

Of course, you’ve taken care of Judith before. The problem is that it was always inside of the safety and the comfort of the prison, a secured area. You’ve held her, watched over her for short periods of time. However, you were always the backup to Beth when she couldn’t or didn’t want to. Rick trusted you when he didn’t have anyone else to turn to, which wasn’t very often. Out of a seven day week, you’d watch her for one day for maybe a few hours. It was always because Rick knew that you’d drop your plans for the day to help him.

Out here, it doesn’t work the same. You’ve been on edge the past few days trying to keep up with her demand for formula and diapers, a problem you never worried about before because that was always a runner’s problem. You were more of a patrol and monitor.

You’ve raided two grocery stores by now, some shelves full, others clean except for the dust that’s been collecting inside. You’ll have her strapped to your chest, knowing full well that there’s at least a dozen walkers somewhere inside of the building, waiting for you to stumble and reveal exactly where you are. Just so that they can catch you and eat you alive.

It doesn’t help that you’re not sure if you’re getting any better at consoling her. When she cries it’s loud, and practically impossible to get her to calm down unless you provide your undivided attention, which you have to drop everything to do. The areas that you’re traveling through aren’t necessarily safe for babies. The only bright side is that you’re getting better at predicting when she’s getting fussy.

This doesn’t even take into account that you’ve had a few close calls with walkers and humans alike. Whether the dead are hiding around the corners, or so obvious but are strong enough to knock you down, it never fails to get you hyped up. Especially since there’s a group that’s been in your area for the past week, following you, and they’re fucking terrifying.

You were traveling through an adjacent neighborhood the other day, and they were nearby. They must’ve come across someone in one of the houses. You could hear every second of them making a game out of his life. And in the end he died anyway, as they were never planning on actually keeping him alive.

As if any of this isn’t stressful enough, you’re supposed to be finding your group, or any sort of part of them. You just want a sign that you’re all heading to the same place. So far, the only idea you’ve had the whole time on where they might be is coming from the maps that are displayed everywhere next to the train tracks. It’s an old trainyard that you’ve been walking for days to find.

It’s a place called Terminus.

You know nothing about it, only that it’s the nearest settlement in miles, and that the rest of the group might have been thinking the same thing you are; you’ll all meet there. After spending two years with them, you’d hope that you’d be thinking along the same lines as they are.

You just need to get there, as soon as you have one other person, it’ll be easier to think straight.

Judith lets out a huff, squirming against your body. You readjust her in the wrap to make her comfortable again, but if she’s getting restless, then it’s only a matter of time before she throws a fit. You hum to her for a few minutes, watching for the next entrance to the neighborhood.

You figured out the trick to covering as much distance as possible, and it’s traveling at night while she’s sleeping. Unfortunately, you think you’re running out of that luxury, the longer you take, the farther away the group might be getting. They’re probably accepting the fate that Judith’s already dead, and you’re somewhere buried in the rubble back at the prison.

You haven’t slept since yesterday afternoon, and you can’t really afford to stop again. However, as much as it sucks, you need to stop to rest for an hour for Judith’s sake. If you let her out of the wrap for a little while, then she might be able to go on for longer tonight.

You cross through the grass, heading for the third house in the neighborhood. The streets are relatively clear, if you don’t count the fall leaves that cover the concrete. There’s not a single walker to be seen nearby, so you have high hopes that the houses are going to be pretty empty.

“It’s okay, Judith.” You murmur, supporting the back of her head with your hand while you wander up the porch steps. You take in the outside of the house as you get closer, like the fact that the windows are still intact, which is a good sign. You can see through the front window that there’s curtains inside, it’ll allow you to hide you from the outside. It’s almost a perfect place to stay.

The doorknob is cold to the touch, and you half expect it to be locked, but it’s not, it’s just stiff against the doorframe as if it hasn’t been moved since the beginning of the apocalypse. You use your shoulder to force it open a little quicker. You close it gently.

The house is quiet, leading you to believe that it’s empty, but you’re not dumb enough to believe that. You slam your hand on the wall a few times, hoping to stir any walkers that might be lurking inside of the house.

While you wait for them to come out, you make your way through the house, occasionally knocking on surfaces, pausing to listen, and continuing. Every room you pass through seems clean and preserved. There must be only one walker here, because by the time you’ve made it through the first floor, it’s made itself known by banging on a door upstairs. You finish your sweep, moving into the living room to close the curtains before going upstairs.

The bedrooms are all empty, the exception being the noise that’s coming from what seems to be a closet. You go into the master bedroom to lay Judith in the middle of the bed while you take care of the walker. It’ll only be for a minute, she can survive being alone.

You shut the door behind you, heading straight for the closet. As you pull out your knife, you position yourself behind the door. That way you’ll be able to kill it from behind while it stumbles forward. You carefully reach forward, turning the knob and jerking back as it hazardously swings open.

Just as you thought the lone walker comes out, fingers bending at awkward angles as it moves forward, searching for the source of the noise. You bump the door out of the way, plummeting your knife into the back of its head. Its knees buckle, immediately falling forward. You struggle to get your fingers untangled from its greasy hair in time.

You’re entirely too slow, accidentally pulling a chunk of it out. You let out a closed-mouth shrill noise, flinging it across the room. You watch as it hits the wall, and refuses to fall further than that. You press your lips together, wanting to gag at the sight, but instead you reach forward, pulling your knife out of the back of its head.

Leaving the body where it is, you head over to the bathroom to wipe off your knife and your hands. As you’re digging through the drawers and cupboards, you come across baby wipes and a bottle of hand sanitizer, which you proceed to dump on your hands. The baby wipes are a lost cause, every single one of them’s dry. You dump the package into the trash can by the toilet, and leave to go to the master bedroom.

Already, the stench of the rotting corpse is filling the air. You’ve gotten used to the smell to some degree, but not well enough to be able to ignore it completely. You open the door to the bedroom to find that Judith hasn’t moved an inch.

She’s awake, though, and stares as you get closer. It’s probably about time you change her and give her a bottle, let her relax some before you leave the house and get back on the road again. First things first, you need to check to see if there’s any baby supplies in the house.

For the most part, you’ve already searched the entire downstairs. There wasn’t any formula from what you saw, but that doesn’t mean there’s not anything else. Other people could’ve passed through and left something behind. Besides, the baby wipes were a sign of hope to you.

You check the master bedroom first, since you’re here. You go through the closet, the dresser and even the nightstand. There’s nothing that could be useful, not even a bottle of ibuprofen. You scoop Judith into your arms as you move into the next room, hoping it’ll be different.

This one seems to be staged as a guest bedroom, so you’re not all that surprised when you toss it and find nothing in here, either. The third and final bedroom seems to have belonged to a little girl. The walls are painted a light lavender, there’s a Barbie house in one corner, a toy chest overflowing with dolls and stuffed animals alike on the opposite side.

You search the dresser drawers, finding clothes that are entirely too big for Judith. If you had to guess the girls’ age, it couldn’t be more than three years old. When you open up the closet, you’re met with nothing that’ll help you. Just a bag of toy accessories that are small enough to choke on, and when you pull down an old box, you’re met with a faceful of dust, and nothing even remotely helpful inside of the box.

Judith sneezes, you use your sleeve to brush the dust off of her face.

Well, the good news is that you still have enough supplies to carry you to Terminus. All you have to do is hope that they’ll have something for you there. Or if Rick is there, he’ll be able to step up and take over completely. He might have stopped going out on run’s altogether back at the prison, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have a clue on where to find said supplies.

Back in the master bedroom, you shut the door and lock it, laying Judith on the bed. You check the windows, pop the lock, and push it open. It’s wide enough for you to make a quick escape if you need to. For good measure, you kick out the screen that keeps bugs from coming inside. You’d rather be safe than sorry, and the less noise you make on the way out, the better.

You change Judith, prepare her a lukewarm bottle of milk, and then sit on the bed while you feed her. An hour, that’s all you can afford to relax. If you keep walking, then you think you might make it to Terminus by tonight. You’re not sure how they’ll react if you walk up during the early hours of the morning.

Once you’re done feeding Judith, you rub her back for a few minutes to get her used to the sensation. And then you throw a shirt over your shoulder as you get to burping her. You’ve watched Beth and Rick do it a hundred times, and you’ve done it so many times in the past couple of days, too. You’re supposed to do it during the feeding, which you usually do, but since this is such a small bottle, you decided to wait until the end.

When you’re done, you decide to lay on the bed, carefully positioning Judith on your chest in the hope that she’ll fall asleep faster. You rub her back slowly, staring at the ceiling. You’ll be lucky if she even goes down, especially with how often you’ve been forcing her to sleep lately. You can’t help it.

You close your eyes, thinking about how your arrival at Terminus will go. They’ll probably greet you at the gate, get you situated somewhere comfortable. You’ll ask about Rick, or any small groups that seem to have arrived one after the other lately. And then they’ll lead you straight to your friends, whom you’ll coordinate your next steps with.

It’s right around the corner…

—

The sound of the front door being slammed off its hinges wakes you with a terrifying start. An instant shot of adrenaline hits your body as you move to sit up. You manage to catch Judith before she slides off your chest from the speed you sit up at, blinking rapidly to get the static to go away.

You don’t move just yet, though, listening for another noise to confirm you’re not hearing things. You can see golden sunbeams on the bedroom door, telling you that it’s no longer morning, and it’s creeping into night already. You fell asleep thinking about Terminus and your group, and it was for far much longer than an hour.

The sound of several men laughing downstairs is enough for you to get moving. You carefully lay Judith down on the bed, turning to the baby wrap that’s laying on top of your backpack. You yank it onto your body, trying to tie it securely but quickly, because you will not be caught dead in front of these men.

As you’re putting Judith into the sling, you can hear heavy boots against the wooden stairs. You fix her leg, tucking her head against your chest. You slide open the window, throw your backpack onto the roof, and then scramble over the nightstand to get out of it. You move the screen out of the sight of the window, and shut it for good measure, hurrying to get out of sight.

This creates a new problem on how you’re going to get down. If it were just you, you’d break your legs jumping down onto a semi-soft surface, and then you’d get to running. You have Judith strapped to your body, and even though it would be easiest to go through the house to get out the front door, there’s no way you’ll make it that entire length without fucking up somehow. Whether that be from Judith making a noise, or someone catching you.

You wander along the roof, surveying the areas where you can leave. From what you can tell, the entire group of men are inside of the house. You don’t have to worry about them being outside, for now. Which leaves only one option on how you’re going to get out of here; jumping onto the porch.

You crouch by the front of the house, slowly pulling the backpack off of you, and throwing it down. Most of the important stuff inside of the bag, like food and water, are packaged so that there’s no chance that you’ll waste what’s inside. You were smart enough to do that to her formula after the first sticky situation you came across.

You move the scarf wrap so that it’s holding Judith’s head in place, hoping that it’s enough support. You sit, and then scoot, and hang your legs over the side of the roof, gritting your teeth at the strain and the idea of jostling Judith too much. You let go with one hand, and have enough time to grab Judith before you fall the rest of the way, knees hitting the painted wood painfully hard.

Judith doesn’t cry, and since you can still feel her breathing on your chest, you stand to leave. In that same moment, you can see that the group of men decided to open the living room curtains, allowing them to see the outside. You freeze long enough for you to have a brief staring contest with one of the men inside.

It was almost a perfect escape.

You turn to leave, hearing him shouting inside. You nearly trip down the porch stairs twice, and barely grab your backpack as you take off running, the front door slamming open once again. Once the backpack is secured on your shoulders, straps pulled tight, you hold Judith’s head while you run deeper into the neighborhood.

It’s fairly diverse, and the further you go, the more walkers you come across. You dodge them, weaving between houses and beaten down backyards. They’re yelling at you, what they’re going to do when they catch you. You grit your teeth, panting heavily as you head in one direction, and then switch to throw them off.

It’s a home stretch when you find the woods, flat-out disappearing inside of them. You hope that the sun sets a little faster, because once the light is gone, it’ll be harder for them to find you, and since they use flashlights, it’ll be easier for you to see them.

You alternate between running and walking for another hour, trying to find your way back to the train tracks. Eventually you’re forced to stop again to change Judith and set her up for another bottle. You crouch next to a tree, leaning on it for support. Judith sits on your thigh facing away while you pat her back, burping her again.

She’s fussy because of all the jostling from the running, you can’t be mad at her for it. It just means that you’ll have to take it slow from now on and wait for her to fall asleep, if she’ll even do that. You let her sleep when you took that nap yourself, she’s probably not going to go back down.

You close your eyes, letting your head hang. It can’t be that long to Terminus. You’ll walk along the tracks until you find a map, and from there you’ll calculate how far away you must be.

That’s exactly what you do. You hold Judith in your arms, quietly humming songs to her while you walk through the trees, keeping an eye out for the tracks. You can see an abandoned train car, which you make a beeline for immediately. On the outside wall, there’s a map with the path you’re taking highlighted in pink.

You’re closer to the trainyard than you thought you were, but it’s still going to be a while until you reach it. From here, you need to follow the tracks, they’ll lead you right to Terminus.

The walk there is quiet and eerie. The sun sets the rest of the way, allowing the night creatures to come out. There’s owls and crickets to fill the silence, you’re somewhat grateful for. It’s when the wolves start howling, do you grow nervous about what else might be around you. You take the chance of walking directly on the tracks after that.

You have to take several breaks to keep Judith from screaming her head off. She’s growing tired of you walking for hours on end. You wish she could understand that you’re not doing this to her on purpose. You wish so badly to lay down and go to bed like normal for once, instead of fucking up your sleep schedule. If you could afford to, you would.

You didn’t realize that the group that’s been following you had been so close. You thought that they were further behind, especially because they kept dicking around in every area they passed through. You thought that because of how long you’ve been traveling in the night that it would put them hours behind.

In the early hours of the morning, when the sun begins to rise again and the sky is turning a lighter shade of navy, you decide to sit down for an hour. You take care of Judith, pinching yourself when you feel the exhaustion dawning on you. You can’t afford to sleep. The Terminus maps are getting more popular, so you have to be getting closer.

You stretch, and eat the last of the food that you’ve been saving. You’ve been drinking out of a jug of water over the past week, and it’s basically done for. It’s the same water you’ve been using for Judith’s bottles. You’re surprised it didn’t run out days ago, and it might have something to do with the fact that you’re drinking out of it sparingly, hoping to avoid going back into another grocery store.

You pick Judith up, and get back to walking for the rest of the day. Despite the fact that it’s getting colder at night, it’s done nothing in the daytime. You’ve got the sun beating down on the side of your face for most of the day, causing a nasty headache to form that only goes away when you relax your face. Which is hard to do with the sun.

It’s a miserable circle.

By the afternoon, you’ve begun to drag your feet, wanting to take another break. You push through because of the last map, telling you that you’re only a couple of miles away now. Judith continues to squirm uncomfortably, making you wince and readjust her, only for her to return to the position.

You stop to change her, and use the last of the water on another bottle that you give her while you walk. She manages to spit up half of it back up and on your shoulder, causing you to pull off your shirt to change into the spare. She begins to cry after that, probably expecting you to stop and take a longer break, rather than ignoring the fact that your favorite shirt was ruined by baby spit up.

You bury it in the leaves. What else are you supposed to do with it? Wash it? As if you have time for that anymore.

The sun is coming back down when you finally see the fencing through the trees. For the first time in several days, energy and excitement bubble up inside of you. You support Judith in the wrap as you walk faster, eager to see the building that you’ve been walking days to see.

However, as you get closer, you begin to realize that the smoke in the air is coming from the trainyard. Your fingers lace through the fence, face screwing at the sight of Terminus. It’s an eerily familiar sight to a place you lost only a week before. It’s a replica of the prison.

The building is on fire, attracting walkers. The dead are all shuffling inside, trampling over the fence that once protected the place. You can even hear the faint sound of gunfire, the owners trying to protect the place that they had been living in. It’s clear that something bad happened here, and all you can do is hope that your prison group wasn’t inside when it happened.

You can’t help the sigh that leaves your mouth, and you struggle to blink away the tears of frustration when they spring into your eyes. What are you supposed to do now? This was your goal, this was supposed to be the end of you traveling alone. You have Judith, who’s growing increasingly difficult to take care of, since you can’t even do it properly, and you’ve got a group that’s been tailing you for days now. They’re probably not even that far away. It’s only a matter of time before they find you.

You sniff, and wipe away a stray tear, turning away from the fence. You shuffle back to the tracks, because there might have been something that you missed. You stopped paying attention because you were trying so hard to keep your eyes open to be alert if a walker came around. There’s a chance that your group did come through and left a sign for stragglers.

At this point, anything would be better than nothing.

The hushed sound of voices brings you to a stop, already turning to run. You lower yourself to the ground first, trying to peer through the trees. You need to make sure that it’s the group that’s been on you. You saw a good number of their faces back at the house.

You catch sight of curled hair, the man turns his head enough for you to see the side of his face. The stubble that covers the lower half of his face, the scowl that his mouth is twisted into. It’s a familiar face—it’s your familiar face.

You can’t help leaping to your feet at the sight, starting toward him, “Rick!”

He’s wearing a brown jacket that you don’t recognize, a hard look on his face. He turns stiffly, hands prepared on the automatic in his hands. He’s not the only one you can see from your group. There’s more—everyone. Everyone is here from what you can tell.

A smile breaks over Rick’s face at the sight of you, arms opening to embrace you. You wrap one arm around his body, fighting the sob that’s trying to make its way out of you. You thought that you weren’t going to see him again.

“(Y/n).” Rick murmurs into your hair.

You don’t want to, but you pull away from the hug, grabbing Judith out of the wrap so that he can see her. He’s confused for a moment, it’s not registering, and then his face smooths over, mouth falling open.

“Judith.” He takes her from you.

Carl lets out a choked noise, coming forward to see his baby sister.

“I grabbed her.” You hold onto his jacket, “I’ve been taking care of her, but she hasn’t been making it easy.”

He lets out a laugh, pressing a kiss to her forehead, and letting Carl take her when he reaches. You open your mouth to speak again, when Rick pulls you closer, and then presses his lips to yours.

The movement happens too fast, and you’re barely registering the fact that he’s kissing you for the first time, and his lips are so warm, and you’re so happy that you found him, when he’s pulling away. He doesn’t move too far, only enough for him to speak, whispering against your lips, “Thank you.”

#ilguna #rick grimes #rick grimes imagine #rick grimes oneshot #rick grimes x reader #rick grimes fanfic #twd #the walking dead #request #fluff

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lavendertales · 1 year

Note

Hello my love! I was wondering if you could write something angsty about Din Djarin. He and the reader are in this “will they or won’t they” type of situation, anytime they get a little too close or too deep in something emotional Din just pushes the reader away cause he can’t expresses his feelings well? It could end in fluff or angst its up to you! Thanks babes

not sure if it comes across as angsty but I do hope you like this fluffy piece, love❤️

tales of the heart—Din Djarin x gn!reader

word count: 833

Joining Din on his missions carried no expectations from either side. You simply provided him with medical assistance when needed and tended to the ship while he was gone and nothing else.

But several situations arose where you truly believed something might happen between you and Din.

You’ve grown close over the course of several months; that much was to be expected. And he had grown very fond and protective of you, but spending so much time with him began to stir a craving deep within you, one you hadn’t really anticipated.

Each touch of his, while innocent, set your skin on fire; each moment spend in proximity to him, pure torture. Even his voice, velvet-like and tender yet raspy, caused your heart to tremble and your body to almost spasm out of control. But you realized that such interactions might be the most you’ll ever get out of your relationship with Din, so you settled with those. Always around you, yet never enough.

One evening, after you made soup for the two of you, a big thunderstorm began. You weren’t a fan of those, and the loud thunders only made you nervous. But Din took notice and instantly wrapped his arms around you, holding you close to him. He didn’t ask you anything, but simply held you. You knew in that moment you were in love with him. But how could you ever let him know that? He was a Mandalorian, a sworn soldier that didn’t care for silly matters of the heart.

But then he brought you even closer to him and removed his chest plate so you’ll have a more comfortable place to rest. Bewildered, you searched for his eyes underneath the helmet, beyond touched.

“Din…”

You weren’t even sure where you were going with that. All you knew is that you needed him to know how you felt, even if it wasn’t mutual. Gods, you were so close to him that if the helmet wouldn’t have been in the way, you would’ve probably felt his warm breath on your lips. The realization made you delirious.

“Din, I—“

“We should… get some sleep. It’s getting late.”

The way he immediately backed away stung and ached, but it wasn’t within reason. He was probably unaccustomed to having people so close to him until you came along. And now even you were under a question mark.

Instances of the same sort kept happening; holding you too close to him seemed to be triggering Din’s fight or flight, in which he chose the latter. He fled from your touch with every chance he got, and the sting you felt turned into a full on bleeding wound. You feared you may have overstepped some boundaries and thus made Din uncomfortable. That must be why he was pushing you away.

You had to settle this before he’d grow sick of you and throw you off the ship.

“Din? Can I ask you something?”

He didn’t answer verbally, but rather with a simple nod of the head. With a knot in your throat, you went on.

“Why are you avoiding me?” you asked, voice already shaky. “It seems you go out of your way to avoid any physical contact with me, even eye contact. You don’t even look at me. Have I done something wrong? Said something?”

Din shook his head almost violently so. “No, no you didn’t.”

“Then what is it? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t expect anything… personal. I just… I like being with you.”

“You do?”

“Yes. I feel safe with you, and… I like you. I’m… fond of you.”

Underneath the helmet, Din blinked several times, his lungs nearly running out of air.

“I don’t understand,” he confessed.

“What?”

“How you can be… fond of me. You don’t even see me.”

“I don’t need to see you.”

He’s never heard such sweet words from anyone, let alone from someone as wonderful as you.

“It wasn’t something you did. Or said,” he confessed. “It’s me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m not skilled with words. They often fail me, especially since I’ve met you. You’re… very kind and lovely, and… I’m afraid I might be… too fond of you.”

Eyes wide in disbelief, you stared at him for what felt like an eternity.

“I am sworn to the Creed,” he continued. “I only know of loyalty and weapons, making my way through the galaxy. It’s been lonesome, I must admit. But… with you, it is less so. If you’ll have me… I would pledge my loyalty to you until our time in this galaxy runs out.”

Mouth ajar, you kept staring at him in great shock. You didn’t know what else to do.

“Words fail you?” you managed to ask. “What—that’s your idea of not being good? What would it sound like if you think you’d be good?”

Din chuckled, visibly more at ease. “I meant it.”

“So did I. Then… you don’t have to avoid me anymore.”

“Definitely not.”

228 notes · View notes

fanficbarbie · 7 months

Text

❝i got cake and i know he want a slice.❞

read the rest of the series before this chapter or you’re getting spoilers.

A/N: we're back, barbies! i successfully survived midterms so now I can breathe!! i've been working on this all week and tomorrow i promise, i'll work on my requests. a lot of y'all have been in my comments and reposts with pitchforks because joel didn't kiss ginny yet and all i have to say is, same babes. i don't make the rules (yes i do) i just enforce them. this isn't edited so ignore any mistakes. please leave feedback in the comments ★ ˙ᵕ˙ liv

Chapter Summary: the sweetest baker enlists joel to help her volunteer at ellie's school.

Chapter Warnings: language, alcohol, slight age gap (F!MC and Joel are 6 years apart), racial descriptions (tommy says black girls are his type basically), symptoms of anxiety and depression, lmk if i forgot something.

Series Tags: chef! Joel, single! father Joel, no outbreak! Joel Miller, slow burn, dual-pov, fluff, flirting, friendship, eventually established relationship, eventual smut, original character, black!fem!MC, no y/n.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ series masterlist, joel masterlist ⋆ spotify playlist ˖ ݁ 𖥔.

“Taste this,” I demand Joel, shoving the spoon of icing towards his mouth.

Joel stops stacking the plastic plates, looking down at the utensil. “What did you say?” he asks with scrunched eyebrows.

I shake the fork impatiently. “Try,” I demand. He looks at me skeptically before leaning forward and taking a bite of the warm sugary liquid.

His mouth moves slowly as tastes. “Mmmhm, that’s good,” he compliments.

I want to put my hands up to hide the blush that’s inevitably covering my face right now. But I don’t want Joel to notice my reaction. “Thank you. I tweaked the recipe last week,” I say quickly, turning around so I’m not facing him.

“That’s why I’m here,” I hear Joel say.

Shaking my head, I pour the icing over the cakes. “No, you’re here because I didn’t want to be the only one working the booth today,” I defend myself.

“You would’ve called someone else,” Joel points out.

My shoulders rise with my eyebrows. “You’re probably right,” I conceded.

I enlisted Joel to do a booth with me instead of having two separate booths. Neither of us wanted to pull staff from the floor but still wanted to participate for Ellie’s sake. The two of us could handle it, with the help of some friends.

Joel and I mirror each other's movements in the kitchen. He makes sure the COVID-safe fall fest meals are ready and me adding something sweet into the mix. The hum of Taylor Swift plays in the background and I catch Joel slightly humming to ‘Welcome to New York.’ A snicker involuntary leaves my throat and I shove it down, hoping he didn’t pick up on it.

Once my job is done, I allow the dishes to clatter in the sink. The worst part about baking is the prep and the cleaning and I don’t have the energy for that right now.

“Hello?” Madeline’s voice rings through the stairwell.

“Don’t shoot us,” Leonardo’s voice follows shortly after.

A scoff leaves my lips and I near the island to watch Joel skillfully move around the kitchen. Every move has a crafted purpose and I can practically see the blood pulsating through his veins.

My breathing hitches and I shift in hopes of gaining composure. “I don’t even have a gun,” I pipe up.

Joel walks in front of me and motions behind me. We dance around for a little before he grunts in frustration and puts his hands on my waist. My eyes go wide as Joel easily lifts me onto the cold island before reaching behind me. “I do,” he murmurs, sliding the pan of bundt cakes toward his muscled torso.

His smirk has me wanting to strip my clothes off and give it to him in the nastiest way possible. Bad, ginny. He was just sick of you being in the way. “I don’t think that applies to this scenario, Joel,” I stress.

Joel moves from in between my legs and I turn my head to watch Leo strolling into the room confidently. “Hey, Miller,” he boasts.

“Hey,” I hear Joel respond next to me.

Maddie follows shortly behind him, wearing brown leather pants and high-heeled boots. She’s overdressed for a school event, but knowing her she’s probably looking for a husband. “Hi, Joel,” she purs, flashing him a smile.

My body turns to survey Joel’s reaction, but his poker face is stone-cold. “Nice to see you, Madeline,” he tries his hardest to force out through a smile.

It’s not that Joel doesn’t like Madeline, she’s just an acquired taste. Too much time around her can drive you crazy and sometimes when Joel picks Ellie up from the bakery, Madeline is sobbing her eyes out with a glass of wine in her hand.

“Didn’t know you were working the party, man,” Leo notes once he and Madeline cross the large open floor plan into the kitchen.

“Joel’s daughter, Ellie, goes to school with Dina,” I tell Leo, motioning towards Joel.

Madeline nods, sliding into the bar stool and putting her shiny silver purse on the counter. “That makes sense. What are you making?” she leans forward and asks Joel.

Joel rolls his shoulder forward, hunching over to plate the food. “Thanksgiving meals. Each meal comes with turkey and 3 sides. My brother Tommy’s bringing the rest,” he informs her.

Maddie's eyes light up and a smirk creeps onto her face. “I didn’t know you had a brother. Is he a chef, too?” she asks, voice laced with mischief.

Joel shrugs, not bothering to make eye contact with her. “Mostly just a pain in my ass but, yeah. He helps out at the Austin from time to time,” he grumbles.

“That's awesome! Is he cute?” Maddie asks excitedly.

“Maddie!” I hiss towards the blonde.

Joel’s phone buzzes on the counter next to us and he picks it up, turning the screen towards the group. “That would be him,” he says, shaking the device lightly.

Once Joel exits the room, I hit Maddie on the arm with the back of my palm. “What?! Not everyone has a Michelin-star chef whipping meals in their kitchen trying to get in your pants,” she frowns.

My eyes widen and I feel the sudden urge to yank my hair out. Now I know why Joel tugs on his roots. “Joel’s not– he’s not,” I stammer, pausing to collect my breath. “Joel’s not trying to get in my pants,” I sigh.

Maddie raises a brow, looking me up and down. “I beg to differ,” she counters.

Jumping down from the counter, I start to pick up where Joel left off with the meals. “He doesn’t have time to– Leo, don’t eat that,” I swat Leo’s hand, stopping him from picking up a bundt cake prematurely.

Leo winces, putting his hands up in defense before sliding into the bar stool. “So, how’s things been between you two?” he questions.

My brows furrow and I feel confusion wash over me. “What do you mean?” I ask.

“I mean, you’ve been seeing each other for what, a month. Right?” he asks.

Maddie snickers next to me and I shake my head, resuming my careful placing of the assorted dessert flavors. “No, Leo. We literally haven’t even been on a date,” I point out.

Leo twists back and forth in the spinning chairs like a child who’s bored out of his mind. “That means nothing,” he scoffs.

My head tilts and I point the spatula at Leo. “To you, you whore. To me it means something. We’re just friends,” I inform him.

Leo purses his lips and his brows furrow. “Oh, fuck off,” he nips at me.

“What?” I ask him.

Leo rolls his eyes and I want to lean forward to snatch them out of his socket. “I still don’t know how you’re blind to him flirting,” he complains.

Maybe I am reading things wrong. Maybe Joel is interested. “If he flirts with me so much, why hasn’t he asked me out on a date or kissed me?” I ask the pair confused.

My head darts back and forth between my friends. “Maybe he just wants to take things slow,” Maddie tries to explain.

Leo clears his throat and my head whips to face his. “Yup. You said yourself he has a daughter,” he shrugs.

My eyes look at the clock to check and see if we’re doing good on time. Ellie and Dina will be bursting in at any moment. They don’t need to be privy to this conversation.

Once I have my confirmation, I refocus on the to-go containers in front of me. “Then why would he and his daughter sleep in my bed with me the other night?” I ask.

Maddie's jaw drops and her eyes widen. “You slept in the same bed together?!” She practically shrieks.

“Yeah, I told you,” I remind her.

Maddie shakes her head in disbelief. “No, you told me they stayed the night. Not that you were cuddled up with Joel Miller,” she hisses.

I shake my head and begin pleading my case, “I wasn't cuddled up with him. Ellie had a sit–”

Joel walks in and I shut myself up, my eyes immediately finding his. “Hey y’all, I want to introduce you to my brother, Tommy,” he bellows with a smile, stepping to the side.

A man a bit younger than Joel steps through my entryway, his hair slightly slicked back. He’s not my type, but he’s definitely Maddie’s. I stop placing the cakes in the to-go boxes, crossing the floor to meet them halfway. “Come on in. It’s nice to meet you,” I smile, putting my hand on his arm to pull him into the kitchen.

Tommy looks down at me and smiles. “Likewise. Heard a lot about you,” he confesses with warmth in his voice.

Fucking attractiveness and charm must run in the family. “Good things, I hope,” I suggest to Tommy, peering up at him.

Tommy nods, chuckling a bit. “Fantastic things, darlin’,” he assures me and I almost melt. It’s good to know that Joel and Ellie talk about me positively.

When we get to the kitchen, Maddies is already standing seemingly posing by the counter. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Madeline,” she flirts, extending her hand for him to shake.

I let go of his jacket, sliding into Maddie’s seat at the bar. “Tommy,” he shakes her hand before awkwardly turning toward me.

He raises his brow almost as if he’s asking how I know them silently. “Madeline and Leo are my friends from elementary school,” I quickly explain.

Tommy lets out an ah sound, nodding a bit before Leo clears his throat. “Nice to meet you, man,” Leo chimes.

“Likewise,” Tommy returns.

I clap my hands softly, clasping them together in front of my chest. “Now, Tommy. I hate to put you to work but can you help me carry this stuff out to the van?” I request.

Tommy smiles, pushing his hair back with his fingers. “Of course,” he agrees.

My body turns towards my best friends. “Maddie, can you and Leo grab the cookie tubs and put them in the other van?” I ask the pair.

“I can do it by myself,” Leo grumbles and I realize I’ve hurt his ego.

“I know you can. Maddie is just the brains of the operation,” I soothe him.

Maddie snickers and Leo rolls his eyes. “Fine, let’s go brain,” he says, putting his arm around her shoulder.

“Aye aye, Pinky,” Maddie salutes him as they stomp out of the room.

Tommy and I get to work grabbing the Fall Fest dinners and putting them into a large box. After they’re stacked on a dolly, we begin to load them one by one onto the first bakery van. A comfortable silence fills the van as we secure the last of the food. “So, are you single?” I ask Tommy, attempting to play matchmaker for Maddie.

Tommy wipes his hands on his pants and my nose scrunches. Later he’s going to wonder where that stain came from… men. “Depends on who’s asking,” he drawls suspiciously.

I scoff, hopping down out of the van. “You and Leo are the biggest whores I’ve ever met. It’s a simple question Tommy,” I rant before forcefully pushing another box towards him.

Tommy stops the box from moving so quickly across the large metal floor paneling. “Who’s asking, Ginny?” he directs.

My leg bounces and the ways Maddie will kill me for this runs through my brain. “Madeline,” I jabber, hoping he won't tell her.

Tommy looks up at me blinking rapidly. His mouth forms a large o and his brows furrow. “I’m single, but I’m not interested,” he declares.

I put my hands on my hips. “What do you mean you’re not interested? She’s literally perfect,” I say, pointing out the fact that she’s a blonde with blue eyes. She’s every man in America’s dream.

Tommy shrugs. “Hate to say it but we Millers have a type. She’s beautiful, just not my cup of tea if you catch my drift,” he explains resuming his work.

Ohhhh. I didn’t know the Millers prefer brown women. But then again, I’ve never actually been to Joel's house or seen a picture of Sarah, or his exes. How the fuck was I supposed to know? “100%” I confirm, pushing him another box. “Can I ask you something?” I ask.

“Depends-” Tommy starts and I cut him off.

“On what it is I know,” I snap, gnawing on my bottom lip. “How do I say this?” I think out loud.

Tommy's choleric disposition takes over his face, similar to Joel's when he’s had enough. “Whatever it is spit it out,” he growls lowly.

The sweat on my forehead collects and I feel like hot water is being poured onto my scalp. But I have to know how Joel feels about me, and Tommy would know. “Is Joel interested in me?” I blurt, feeling like I’ve finally submerged myself in a cool bath.

Tommy doesn’t say anything, he just purses his lips. The comfort I felt turns into pain when the water turns into ice. My body is frozen and I’m rendered speechless.

I want to flee. I need to get out of here. I shouldn’t have asked. “Oh my god,” I finally speak.

“Mmmhm,” Tommy hums, motioning for me to pass him another box so I can continue t

I rub my eyebrows as the pit in my stomach fills with anxiety. “Oh god, Tommy. What am I gonna do?” I ask, unable to stand anymore with the alley seemingly spinning.

I take a seat in the back of the truck, putting my head in my hands. “What do you want to do?” Tommy asks.

“I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking you,” I groan towards the ground.

“Well the way I see it, lean into it or tell him so he doesn’t fall harder for ya,” he advises.

My brain runs through all the moments that I’ve had with Joel. How the first day we met he offered to cook for me. Every lingering touch, all the compliments he’s given me, when vulnerable he’s been with me. You don’t do that with someone who’s just a friend.

I peel my hands away from my face with realization. “Oh my gosh, he’s been sending so many signals. I’m going to throw up,” I groan.

Tommy steps out of the van, looking down at me. “Please don’t,” he pleads.

Suddenly, Joel comes around the corner at the most inappropriate time. These Millers just pop up anywhere and one day, they’re going to make me piss myself. They need a bell on their ankles. He hands the last boxes to Tommy and I pray to the gods above he didn’t overhear our conversation. “Don’t what?” Joel asks.

Fuck. My body tenses and I try to focus on containing the bile rising in my throat. “Ginny’s feelin’ dizzy. I’m almost finished here. She’s just gonna sit for a second,” he tells his brother.

Joel sits down on the metal butt of the truck next to me. He puts his hand in my lap, palm facing up towards me. I accept his offer, intertwining our fingers. “You need anything, sugar?” he asks sweetly, and I sigh.

I nod, running the back of his hands with my thumb. Attentive Joel is my favorite, but only because I’m an attention whore. “Can you get me a Coke from the fridge? Maybe I just need some caffeine,” I request.

Joel nods, trying to let go of my hand. Although I don’t want him to, I allow him to disconnect from me. “Of course, I’ll be right back,” he says, petting my head before turning around and disappearing behind the van.

A sigh of relief slips my lips and I try to refocus on calming my breathing. “So are you?” I hear Tommy say behind me.

I scoot back against the inside of the van walls, allowing the sides to cool me down. “Am I what?” I ask him with a raised brow.

“Are you single?” he reiterates.

A smirk creeps onto my lips. “Depends on who’s asking,” I taunt him.

“Joel,” Tommy cuts straight to the point, unlike me.

I giggle and I feel like the panic has finally subsided. “Yeah, I’m single,” I tell him.

Tommy finishes securing the last box and he turns around to face me. He puts his hands on his upper thigh, leaning on one leg. Jesus Christ, now that’s attractive. “And open? Ready?” he interrogates.

I nod, sliding out of the truck. “Tommy, I mean it. Make sure Joel knows how ready,” I say to him as he shuts the back doors.

Joel turns off the engine to the bakery van, having pulled into the spot at the school where vendors unload. He turns to me and flashes me a smile. “You alright?” he asks concerned.

After that conversation with Tommy, I needed more than just a Coke. I needed multiple shots of tequila. I forced Tommy and Maddie to join me, leaving Joel and Leo the only sober people to drink the trucks.

I nod, and my body bobs unstabily. “Yes,” I slur.

Joel shakes his head and his head falls back. He lets out a loud bellowing laugh, holding his stomach and I know he’s caught me in the lie. “Well, you are not talking to any parents tonight,” he chuckles, wiping his hands over his face.

I roll my eyes at him. “I wasn’t planning on it. Besides, all the moms are going to be all over hot Chef Miller,” I complain, hoping he doesn’t notice my jealousy.

He laughs again and it’s so beautiful, I want to make his laugh featuring Ellie’s giggle my alarm clock so I can wake up peacefully. Snap the fuck out of it, Imogen. “That’s not going to happen,” Joel says, opening his door.

I don’t get to respond before he shuts it, jogging over to my side to retrieve me. Joel opens the door and I’m reading to pounce. “Yes, the fuck it is,” I counter, feeling my emotional drunk alter ego arise.

Joel leans against the door frame, extending his hand to help me down. “Well good thing I don’t want any of them,” he claims.

I accept his hand, looking at him with hope in my eyes. “Really?” I ask.

Joel’s pupils dilate and he flashes me a smile. “Really,” he confirms, putting his hands on my hips.

He guides me until my back is pressed against the cool metal of the truck. His eyes flicker down to my lips before back up to me. If he’s going to do anything, he better do it now before someone sees us.

“Joel!” “Ginny!” I hear Ellie and Dina’s voices call from behind Joel. Fuck, scratch a bell bracelet. They need a fucking air horn.

Joel steps back, putting some space between us. “Hey kiddo,” he greets her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

Fucking cock blocking crotch demons. Let it go, Imogen. He was probably just trying to perform a wellness check on you. “Hey, Dina,” I say, teetering over to her in my heels.

“Thanks for coming,” I hear Ellie say to her dad.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” I hear Joel say before the second van pulls up in the spot next to us.

Ellie gasps when she sees who’s in the passenger seat. She slams her hand on the glass window, effectively scaring Leo who’s on the other side. “Uncle Tommy!” she cheers before running over to the passenger side.

Joel leans over until his lips are touching my ear. “It’s always ‘Uncle Tommy, Uncle Tommy.’ But never ‘Dad’,” he complains in a whisper.

I sway a bit, unstable from the drinking. “Patience, young padawan,” I quote Star Wars to him.

Joel wraps his arms around my waist to stabilize me. Dina’s eyes look us up and down. She leans forward and sniffs the air in front of my face. “Ginny, are you drunk?” she asks loudly.

“Shhhhh. You’ll tell the whole fucking school,” I shush her, pulling her towards me so Leo can get out of the car.

Dina snickers, lacing her hand in mine. “Come on, we’re walking to the corner store for snacks before it starts,” she enlists me.

I nod excitedly, thinking about the possibility of having slushies and Hot funyons. “Count me in. Got any cash, Joel?” I ask the resourceful man. He’s bound to have something on him and I don’t feel like bringing my purse.

He nods, reaching into his back pocket to pull out a brown leather wallet. “Mmhm. Take Tommy with you, Sugar,” he hands me back two twenties and I gladly accept them, slipping them into Dina’s hands.

I wine, squirming a bit. “But Joel, Maddie will be with us. All girls with Tommy would just be weird,” I complain.

Joel brushes past me, heading towards the back of the trucks. “I don’t care, you’re both drunk. You need someone out there lookin’ after y’all,” he says over his shoulder.

Dina tugs my hands a couple of times, dancing in place. “Awwww,” she coos.

I cover my mouth to try to stop the giggle that slips out. He’s cute when he’s all protective and shit. “Hehe. Does he have a gun?” I ask, pulling Dina towards the back with me.

Joel grabs the handle, opening the heavy doors. “Yes,” he answers.

“Well okay, as long as he doesn’t bother us,” I conceded.

The 3 others from the van join us along with Ellie. Dina immediately ditches me, joining her now best friend. “Tommy, walk with them to the store,” Joel commands his brother.

“Why can’t Leo do it?” Tommy groans like a child.

Joel takes out the Dolly to start unloading the items. “Because Leo’s sober, and I need his help with this shit,” he states frustratedly.

Leo snickers, walking over to the truck to start unloading the boxes. “Ahem,” I clear my throat at Joel.

That fucker forgot one crucial part. “And stay ten paces behind them,” he adds.

Tommy puts his hands up. “Fine by me. I don’t wanna know you’re girly bullshit anyways,” he jeers.

Madeline pats him on the shoulders. “That’s what they all say, Tommy,” she argues.

Maddie links her arm with mine. “We’ll see you guys later,” I say to Joel before joining the teenagers for the walk down the block.

We walk through the parking lot for a bit before entering the school. Whenever I have a drop of liquor in me, I have the urge to Irish goodbye. I drag Maddie with me until were walking closer behind the girls. “We should really lose him,” I suggest.

Ellie looks over her shoulder at Tommy before nodding at Dina. “Okay, follow us,” Dina intrusts.

I nod as we move quickly through the hall taking a left and running into a room. We quickly shut the door behind us, and I peer out the window waiting for Tommy to walk by. When he does, he looks confused turning around in circles. I snicker and he seemingly hears. I quickly pulls my head away from the small plexiglass, hoping he didn’t notice me. “Did we lose him?” Ellie asks, looking over my shoulder.

Maddie takes matters into her own hands, stepping past me to check. “Coast is clear,” she informs us with a smile.

We break out into laughter and I feel like I’ve just pulled off the greatest inside job ever. “Let’s go,” Dina says, reaching for the door handle.

When we get to the store, I bolt toward the Slurpee machine. I grab the largest cup size, filling it with cherry and coke flavors. Once my drink is secured, I grab and fill two cups for Tommy and Joel. Ellie finds me, grabbing Joel's cup, and together we wander the store looking for the spicy chips.

I snatch three bags from the top shelf, figuring someone will stick their fingers in my bag and piss me off. It’s always good to have extras. “You know, I’d be okay if my dad dated someone like you,” Ellie pipes up randomly next to me.

I almost drop the Slurpee onto the tile floor beneath me. “Oh. Where is this coming from?” I ask her with a raised brow.

She grabs some chips before we walk towards the candy aisle to meet with Maddie and Dina. “He asked me if I was okay with him dating someone the other day,” she leaves me hanging on her every word.

“What’d you say?” I dig deeper.

She turns towards me with a smirk on her lips. “I said I wouldn’t care as long as it was you,” she admits.

The door to the corner store dings and Tommy is pushed in by the windy city. He looks pissed as fuck as he stomps over towards us. “The hell? Your dad is gonna kill me if he finds out–” he starts before Ellie cuts him by shoving a Slurpee in his hand.

“He’ll be fine. Let’s go, Uncle Tommy,” she motions towards the counter.

By the time we’re back in the gym, everything is set up. Joel graciously accepts the Slurpee, which turns his tongue blue, sending Ellie into a fit of giggles. Now hours later, I walk around the gym shopping at other booths with Madeline. I can’t deny that every time I look at Joel, our eyes link for a second too long. The simple interaction causes my breath to catch in my chest every time, and I try to ignore it.

After some time, we’re finished looking in the main gym, and we head into the hall to see the art auction pieces. Eligible students can create anything they want; a poem, a painting, or a sculpture to put up for action. The people who come to Fall Fest pledge money towards an art piece, and the money earned goes towards the student’s college tuition.

We stroll down the hall, mindlessly chatting about which pieces we want to bid on before Maddie points at a specific piece. “That’s fucking gorgeous,” she blusters.

A smile creeps on my face when I look closer at the signature. The familiar white calligraphy makes my heart sing. “It’s Ellie’s,” I boast about the talented young girl.

“Now I see why she’s painting the mural. This is some good shit. I’ve gotta commission her for some art,” Maddie rambles, seemingly entranced by the swirls of paint before her.

I nod, smiling at the though of Ellie becoming an artist of some kind. “She’d probably love that,” I tell her.

When I turn around, I see Joel walking through the door of the large hall. His eyes dart around till he finds me, b-lining for us. He stands in front of me awkwardly and when Maddie turns around, she jumps from being startled a bit. “Well, I’m gonna just go look…” she trails off, effectively excusing herself.

“Can we talk?” Joel asks, tilting his head towards a darker secluded hall.

“Yeah,” I say to him, pulling him into the area not lit by prison lighting.

Once we’re alone, I lean back against the wall. “What’s wrong?” I tilt my head attempting to cajole him into telling me.

“Nothin’ it’s just, I’ve bit my tongue 'cause I was unsure if–” he pauses and takes a deep breath. “I enjoy spendin’ time with you, Ginny. You’ve become important to me and you should know that I care about you deeply, sugar,” he confesses.

Oh, I wasn’t expecting that. This train has a one-way route towards the friend zone. “I care about you too Joel! And I like spending time with you too. And Ellie,” I sadly follow his lead.

Joel steps closer, putting his hand over my head and leaning forward. “I just really don’t wanna lose you,” he expresses, voice laced with sincerity.

My hands snake up around his waist and I grip the grey shirt he’s wearing. “How would you lose me, Joel?”

Joel's eyes stay fixed on mine and the brown in his eyes swirls like hot chocolate. “Sugar, I feel more than just a friendship level for ya. I like you,” he stresses.

“Oh, Joel. I’m not going anywhere. I wouldn’t,” I promise him, pulling him closer so our upper bodies are pressed towards each other.

He sighs, looking down at the ground between us. “I know, but telling you that means changing our relationship. I don’t want to scare you and I didn’t know–�� he starts before I tap his side, cutting him off.

“Joel, I like you too. Like… a lot,” I confirm.

His head quickly rises and he sighs, “Oh.”

I’m starting to feel embarrassed by the whole situation. “Dear, god. I-I don’t know why my brain goes blank when I look at you. I think I’m going crazy. I feel like a high schooler,” I falter.

Joel chuckles, leaning forward to press his forehead onto mine. I clear my throat, impatient tugging at his side. “So, I think this is the part where you’re supposed to kiss me,” I murmur.

Joel takes his forehead off of mine, searching my face seemingly wary of crossing the line. All he’s going to find is my stupid shit-eating grin. “Are you sure?” Joel asks for consent and I think it’s the most sexy thing I’ve ever heard leave a man's lips.

“Positive,” I nod, radiating with excitement.

“Okay,” he sighs and a wolfish grin creeps onto his face.

His hands slide up to my neck, pulling me closer. “Okay,” I murmur.

He grabs the back of my neck, crashing his lips onto mine. We both smile into the kiss and I force a giggle back down my throat. My lips open slightly, granting him entrance. His warm tongue dances with mine and I marvel at the taste of whiskey and apple on his lips. It’s filled with so much passion, that I feel like my heart is about to explode.

His fingers thread into my hair, massing my scalp as he kisses me. I moan into his mouth and my clit pulsates with a hunger for him. He disconnects our lips, leaving us both panting because of the other. “Was that as good for you as it was for me?” I murmur against his lips.

“Probably better,” Joel grunts before pulling back and motioning towards the hard member protruding through his jeans.

“Joel, oh my gosh,” I giggle, stepping forward and wrapping my arms around his torso. “Can I have one more?” I practically salivate, batting my lashes at him.

Joel nods, snaking his hand back around my neck. His thumb strokes my jaw and I lean into him. “Mmmhm,” he hums, dipping his head back down.

His lips connect with mine and my tongue continues to explore his map. I want to stay in this moment forever. It feels like a dream and I don’t want to wake up. His lips are surprisingly soft and I kick myself for not doing this months ago.

The smacking of our lips is apparent when we pull back this time and I know my face is covered in pink flush. “Damn it. I was supposed to do this right. Date first, then kiss,” he curses himself.

I giggle, standing on my tip-toes to press a kiss against his cheek. “Joel, I asked you to kiss me. Besides, we’ve known each other for months,” I acknowledge our past.

Joel nods, but he doesn’t seem ready to let it go. “You’re right, but still. Can I take you out on a date?” he pleads.

I’m practically bouncing on my toes, my mind racing with thoughts of my future with Joel. Relax Ginny, he just asked you out on one date. “Yes,” I blurt.

Joel chuckles at my excitement, taking a step back and lacing his hand with mine. “When are you free next?” he turns to me and asks as we walk back to the gym.

“Thursday, but it’s Thanksgiving. After that, on Friday. Speaking of, do you guys have any plans for the holiday?” I inquire.

Joel shakes his head, confirming my suspicions. “No, just me, Tommy, and Ellie eating at an undecided time,” he informs me.

“How about you join me at Maddie’s house? Her family always orders catering for Thanksgiving,” I offer, hoping he’ll grace me with his presence sooner than a week from now. I get we’re both busy food industry owners, which I love, I just don’t think I can wait that long to be in a romantic setting with him.

“I know. They’ve put in an order at The Austin for the past two years,” Joel dictates and I nod. Just my luck, the man’s food I’ve been shoveling into my mouth for the past 6 holidays is also the man I’m trying to date.

I poke his muscular bicep with my free hand. “Even better, you can personally deliver it and tell everyone who doesn’t like it that they’re wrong. Just like you did on my birthday,” I joke with him and he puts his hands on his chest, seemingly hurt by my statement.

“I’m sorry about that, darlin’. Really I am,” Joel apologizes.

I tug on his hand, trying to grab his attention and snap him out of a spiral. “I’m fucking with you, Joel. Please come. I’m sure Ellie would love it,” I practically beg him.

Joel pauses, looking up to think about it. He’s probably worried about how unpredictable his two family members would be in this setting. “Okay, we’ll come,” he concedes, finally.

“Good. I’ll text you the details. You’re standing straighter,” I beam, pointing out his posture change.

Joel chuckles, rubbing his thumb across mine soothingly. “I feel like a house just lifted off my back. I’ve had my eyes on you since June 30th,” he confesses.

I smirk, leaning closer to him. “So Maddie was right, you were practically drolling on my shoulder,” I taunt.

“She said that?” he asks with furrowed brows.

I nod, attempting not to give him too much information. “Mmmhm,” I hum.

He tugs on my hand, stopping me in my tracks before I reach the entryway. “I’m not going to deny that, Sugar,” he looks me up and down like I’m a meal he wants to ravish.

The thought of us fucking turns me on even more, and I have to remind myself we’re in a high school. “Okay, one last kiss before we’re back in the gym?” I use my siren eyes against him, peering up at him through my lashes.

“I like how you think,” Joel mumbles, sliding his free hand up and around the front of my neck. He gently pulls me forward, connecting our lips one final time. A wave of relief hits me, and I moan as his tongue dances with mine in the filthiest way. Me and Joel Miller are going out on a date.

read the rest of the series

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charlessmiths-wife · 2 months

Text

I’ve realised that my accounts display is highly RDR2 centric, specifically Charles - yet I haven’t made any posts in any way pertaining to either of them! And they’re my greatest loves!

So without ANY FURTHER ADO I present a few of my nearest and dearest headcanons for the gang (most of them are probably incredibly basic… also so biased to my big three of Arthur/charles/sadie)

CW!!!!!! mentions of violence

Under the cut if you’re interested!

-> Arthur has a small barely noticeable scar on his neck, just below where his beard finishes. He tells everyone he simply got it one day when he accidentally nicked himself whilst shaving - only John and Hosea know the truth. He got it when a member of an enemy gang held a knife to his neck too hard once, threatening him. It didn’t go on long enough to cause any lasting damage. Suffice to say Hosea took care of things before it reached that point.

-> Throughout his whole life, Arthur struggled to differentiate the kinds of love he felt. He loved Mary and Eliza, I truly believe it was romantically, in Mary’s case and he was aware of this, though there’s less to go off of with Eliza - but in terms of his relationship with members of the gang, that’s slightly more difficult. He knows he loves John like a brother, Dutch and Hosea like a father, and Sadie like a sister. His love for Charles is… different to all those, very much so less familial. But he died before ever figuring out what it was.

-> Charles and Sadie visit his grave every year. John also does, but not with them, he prefers to go alone.

-> After Arthur dies, Abigail tries so hard to get John to open up. He never really does. The closest he gets to doing so is when he kills Micah.

-> Sadie never EVER forgets Jake, as much as I would love to be a sadigail truther (and I truly believe there’s certainly a lil fruit in Sadie’s punch if you get me) Sadie never finds the connection she had with him anywhere else.

-> I’ve already touched on Charthur, whilst I certainly think the possibility of feelings developing was right there, I don’t think it could ever have materialised within the time frame of RDR2

-> in some hypothetical and beautiful universe in which Arthur lived, it takes years for Arthur to realise his feelings - even more so to actually act on them.

-> that is, if he chose to act on them. Something tells me Arthur would stay silent, and opt to let Charles make the first move if he wished.

-> When Arthur got sick, Sadie actually silently believed he would get better. Somewhere deep down she knew that was likely impossible - but she wanted to believe it wouldn’t happen again, she wanted to believe someone she cared for wouldn’t be taken from her for another time. It was easier for her to believe than accept reality at times.

-> John also believed silently he would get better, the gang had always pulled through, no matter what - it was hard for him to comprehend Arthur might not be around anymore.

-> out of the three of them, Charles was the only one who I believe truly accepted Arthur’s fate before it happened.

-> I think Dutch did care for John and Arthur, and the whole gang at a point. But Dutch, in my opinion, has an innate desire (more than anything) to feel in control and protect himself and his leadership. A combination of the death of Hosea and the manipulation of Micah (as well as Dutch’s own personal desires and characteristics) are what I believe led to his care for the gang dissolving into care for only himself.

-> not rlly a headcannon, more of an opinion - but Javier gets too much hate. He chose to stand against John and Arthur, but in my opinion, this seems understandable if you look at it from his perspective? His loyalty lay with Dutch because Dutch, in his mind, SAVED him. He gave him family, support, food, and, well - life, for want of another word.

-> I firmly believe that, if Shaun was still alive, he would’ve done the exact same thing as Javi.

-> (coming from the most DIEHARD FAN so please recognise this is no hate) but sometimes I think Arthur gets well.. watered down too much as being presented as a good man who was living in unfortunate circumstances. And whilst I’d say this is largely true, at least on a good honour play through - I’d also say it’s largely true for many of the other members of the gang? Sadie, John, Abigail, Javier, Charles, Lenny… I’d say they’re just some of the examples of characters who would also fit such characterisation and deserve the same sympathy as Arthur

-> John was the BEST at playing cards back in camp, Arthur never knew how. It infuriated him.

-> “Goddamn bastard… fool at damn near everything else… but a goddamn wizard at poker…”

That’s all! Feel free to add any you have yourself in the comments :)

#rdr2 #arthur morgan #charles smith #sadie adler #john marston #abigail roberts #dutch van der linde #hosea matthews #javier escuella #red dead redemption community #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption #periodically I forget how much I love this game #k talks #also if yous want any more PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ASK #cus I’ve got #plenty more where that came from

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giftplane · 16 days

Text

On conversations with The Universe

Or, receiving advice you'd rather not follow. Not if you don't have to.

[ A small thing, a conversation I envisioned this morning. Minor, minor spoilers, but nothing major. You know what Siffrin's getting up to. I don't know what I'm doing. ]

The Favor Tree.

Siffrin had been here a couple of times, since he’d gotten to Dormont. Not every time he looped, but whenever he needed to to back to the village, he would come over. It was, in part, because he had to - because they knew Isabeau was always there, and he had to find him to sent him off (and to wonder, why does he do that hand thing…) - but…

It was also a reprieve, to Siffrin.

Because here, things didn’t feel… Stagnant. Because there was at least one person who-

“Hello, Stardust~!” There was a call as he drew close enough to the tree to sit down. “Your Fighter, he went on his merry way, correct?”

“Mhm.” Siffrin nodded. “But you wouldn’t have called to me like that if you didn’t know. He would’ve heard you.”

Loop’s expression was unchanging as they seemed to pause. “...I suppose that’s true. Anyways, dear Stardust, how can I help you this loop~?”

Jumping into it, are they? Siffrin had to admit they were always a little unprepared, when the conversation began. Maybe, with time, he’d be used to it. He mulled over what to talk about, before he shifted on the root he’d taken a seat on. “...Let’s just talk about something, I guess.”

“Of course! Let me see, let me see…” Loop seemed to smile at this, pausing to think over what to discuss. In these pauses, Siffrin caught himself thinking about Loop. The inflection of their voice was familiar, but they couldn’t exactly place why… All they could grab at was that it was familiar to them.. Before they could try to figure out anything else, they were cut off.

“So! Stardust, let’s see…” Loop gave a hum. “So, I’ve noticed you’ve been asking your party for less and less help when you get into battles. Why is that?”

Oh great, it’s a conversation about you! Siffrin startled, just a little. “Y-You… You noticed?”

“Of course, Stardust!” Loop replied. “I like to keep my eye on you, you know. But you’ve been doing most of the heavy lifting in your battles.”

“Isn’t it obvious why, Loop?” Siffrin mumbled as he hid a bit of his face in his cloak. “You’ve probably noticed, haven’t you? I loop, but I remember everything, so all of the experience and battling I’ve done doesn’t disappear. But for everyone else…”

“So you feel like you’re overpowered, compared to the rest of your party?” Loop asked, and Siffrin nodded.

“If we want to get through the House again, to try to kill the King again, shouldn’t--”

“Stardust, why don’t you tell your party?” Loop asked, almost puzzled. “Or at least, ask them for more help in your fights.”

“Loop, I don’t..” He seemed to find it a bit difficult to place his words. “They can’t find out, Loop. I was given this power for something, so wouldn’t it be best if they just didn’t know? They can’t know, especially not..”

Especially not Odile. She seems to know everything, so she could probably figure me out, and then..

He felt a twinge in his stomach as he thought it over, but he was startled back to the present by Loop seeming to clear their throat.

“And you think doing all of the work is ‘less obvious’ than just asking them for help?” Loop asked. “Stardust..”

Oh, Stars. He took a sharp breath. He supposed they were right, but he knew, he knew they needed to get through the House as fast as they could manage. He needed to convince them, at the same time, though; anything more obvious than being more skilled in the situation they were all in would get him found out, and that was the thing he wanted the least.

“I.. suppose, I could slow it down a bit.” He mumbled into the hem of his cloak. It was almost a surprise that Loop even heard him.

“Delightful, Stardust! After all, you wouldn’t want to overwork yourself, either.” They cupped their hands together. “You need to be the best you can be to fight the King!”

“Of course.” Siffrin replied. The best that they could be, huh..? Perhaps they could play the part, at least for now. They didn’t want to worry their friends by being more weird, than they already seemed to be.

Of course, that was if they decided they wanted to follow Loop’s advice at all; while they were a genuine help in finding out what to do, the matter of the House felt much, much more pressing than slowing himself down. He supposed he would make the decision on following it when he got to the House, tomorrow, to go through it again to try and get at the King. He’d just have to wait and see.

Oh, Stars. You know how this one goes.

#tak writes things #in stars and time #isat #isat siffrin #isat loop #drabbles #i think that would be the proper term for it? it's not like a lot. it's a small thing. not very long.#but i woke up this morning and in the like. the just-woke-up-haze i saw a conversation between sif & loop in it. so here we are.#this is the first time i've like written for sif so apologies if its a little rough #anyways ill shut up in the tags now have fun reading my brain soup! i had fun writing it!

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jayceflwrs · 2 years

Text

Hey?

Vance X Y/n

Y/n was just a normal person walking to school one day. That one day was so so fucking bad from there on out. Y/n just had to fucking bump into Pinball Vance Hopper.

The amount of harassment Y/n has to go threw daily is just something else.

now on to the actual fanfic :)

——————————————————————————

You were just walking home one day, like always the curly blonde starts walking up behind you with his goons. You known it was him cause you can just feel the anger in his steps. Obviously.

You start jolting for your life like always, but this one time you decided to actually run faster. The curly blonde and his goons start running after you, but for some reason they stopped this time letting you get away.

After you get to your house and up to your room, where it’s obviously safe from the blonde.

“well shit I’m definitely getting beaten the shit out of tomorrow” you say while changing into different clothes and laying down. You start to drift off after awhile in your head and listening to some records that your step (mom/dad, or any parental figure) gave you.

You wake up in a daze forgetting what happened just yesterday. You start to get ready for school. You see Finn and Gwen coming out of their houses so you decide to walk up and join them on their way to school. “hey guys, what’s up?” you say oblivious to the shock on their faces. “oh you’re alive? i thought vance and his goons of friends would’ve beaten you up yesterday, you know, on time for schedules for once?” He says with a sly smile, Gwen pushes his shoulder “hey don’t say that, anyways I heard vance has a thing for someone at school, I feel bad for whatever fuck knuckle that is”, “well I’m hoping it’s not none of us” you say with a laugh, a loud laugh attracting attention to yourself you see the certain blonde you were just talking about turn around with a really irritated face.

“Oh shit” you all three say almost at the same time.

Vance starts to come up to you. He pulls you up by your shirt “bitch stop fucking laughing so loud it’s annoying, no one fucking likes you, Kay?” He says with the most angry tone.you could tell he hated you, or so you thought, you don’t really know.

“what are you gonna do kiss me? that would really be disgusting you know? I don’t know how many herpes you got from sleeping around with half of the girls.. but I don’t want them y’know?” you say in a confident voice, for once you wish you never open your mouth to begin with.

He punches you straight in the jaw and drops you on the ground, “fucking stupid bitch” he says in a way that you think could be him nervous but no one besides his family has saw him nervous. After the incident he walks away with his friends behind him as always

Gwen and Finn help you up. You automatically feel the amount of pain shoot threw your body, it’s not like he hasn’t done worse but again your body just got use to not being a punching bag after a day.

“you know it’s actually quite funny how he treats me, out of everyone he specifically chose me, and yet he beats on me the most” I chuckle under my breath. “Maybe you’re the girl he likes?” Gwen says In a sarcastic tone,Finn pinches her arm “HEY?” Gwen whisper screams at Finn “what?” He says looking around, noticing Robin he starts walking towards him.

While you get to school you notice everyone’s already in the halls and going to classes. You get your stuff for first period and go to sit down. You noticed after probably ten minutes Vance is just staring at you, he starts to write something down on a piece of paper and rolls it into a ball and throws it at you.

you uncrumble it and read it, “hey I’m sorry can we talk after school?..<3” you read it and scoff, you know he’s gonna set you up to just get fucking beaten again. you write “no thanks lol :)” and fold it neatly before placing it on his desk while walking by. He automatically starts to open it.. he reads it for a moment, then he started staring at it? no no, he’s reading it? maybe he actually wanted to talk? That’s actually unusual of vance he never wanted to actually talk. He only felt anger towards you.

After a few periods it was finally lunch. As you started to get seated down you notice Vance is still looking at you. “hey this is weird but Vance wanted you to have this” some random guy came up and gave you a note obviously from Vance, sadly.

You open it and it says “I know I may seem like a dick but I earned this reuptaion meet up with me at the park I promise no one else will come be there or I’ll actually beat the shit out of you,mkay?” you scoff and toss it in the trash. Hoping he got the gesture, it seems like he did cause after he stopped looking at paying attention to you overall. No more beatings,stare downs,chases, no nothing. You guess he really wanted to talk.

After three weeks, you finally go up to the door of his house knowing he’d be there.

Knock

Knoc-

The knocking of your fists get cut off by the curly blonde. Vance.

“Hey?” He says

“Hey..” you say

#the black phone #gwen the black phone #vance the black phone #vance hopper x reader #pinball vance #vance hopper #finney blake #finneyblackphone

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decks-writing-blog · 2 months

Text

Whatever the Fuck Benrey is: Chapter Five: Roomies

Chapter One

Previous Chapter

How powerful Benrey was had always fluctuated based off where he was and if he had enough power to imbue objects that could draw in more power for him – like the passports on Xen – but he’d always been consistently stronger in the Black Mesa facility. More so in certain parts of it but always even just entering should’ve given him a buff. Which was part of why he never made much of an effort towards resisting the people sent to bring him back. This time though the inside of the facility felt the exact same as the outside which had felt only slightly different from Tuefort.

That made sense though, didn’t it? He’d been the most powerful he’d ever been while in Xen. All connections to which were now closed and thus there was less Xen air or whatever floating around the facility to feed him. Maybe the scientists had used Xen energy to make him. Educated speculation but that and knowing he for sure had some kind of connection to Xen should be enough make Gordon happy, right?

He almost marched forward to share this discovery about himself right away. But he’d paused upon stepping off the elevator while the others continued forward, they hadn’t noticed he’d stopped yet. If he was going to sneak off to see how much of his gamer pad was still intact, now was the time to do it. It wasn’t part of the living area which made up most of the start of the facility and was what the Science Team were here to investigate, but it was still thankfully relatively close to the entrance. If one was willing and able to phase through a section of the ground to cut a big turn anyway which Benrey was. Phasing through thick sections always sucked because he couldn’t see but he’d long since imbued his Game Boy with some of his energy, allowing him to sense it and thus find the room with ease once close enough.

Except, while the entrance should’ve been close enough, he couldn’t sense it. Even upon walking further in and towards the rear wall, there was nothing. Something to do with his defeat in Xen when the passports had been blown up or had it been destroyed too? Or maybe his connection to it had been broken upon entering Xen. Well he’d made the trip through the ground enough times that he should still be able to do it. So, trusting the Science Team to keep Gordon safe – much of the danger seemed to be done anyway – Benrey headed off in that direction.

It took longer than it should’ve but he did eventually find what was left of his gamer pad. Which wasn’t much. Parts of the facility were less underground than others or full on above ground, making them more vulnerable to bombings which the US Military had employed in their attempts to wipe Black Mesa off the map. Just his luck, that the part of the facility he’d found a decent sized hidy-hole for his gamer pad was one such area.

Phasing through the rubble, Benrey did his best to look at everything, trying to find anything salvageable. None of it was though. All his stuff was destroyed. He couldn’t even blame Gordon or anyone else action could be taken against because it was the military that did it. If he had as much power as he had on Xen he could maybe do something but… even then probably not. What a massive fucking bummer.

Benrey shifted up to sit atop the rubble and mope. He stayed there like that until it got boring. At which point he started making his way back towards the Science Team, still moping though because it sucked and wasn’t fair. What kind of assholes destroyed a guy’s gamer pad like that? All in a failed attempt to stop an alien invasion too. An alien invasion that the scientists had stopped no thanks to the military trying to kill them too for knowing about it or whatever. The US military sucked.

By the time he made his way back to the Black Mesa’s living area, he was feeling a bit better. He’d been resigned to possibly not being able to come back to check anyway which would’ve meant he had no stuff also. Knowing it wasn’t just inaccessible but completely destroyed was still more aggravating though. Especially since he couldn’t do anything about it.

Once in the living area it didn’t take Benrey long to find the Science Team. They’d set up a in one of the areas meant to be a park, complete with now dying trees and grass. There were still bodies about here as well as the area as a whole but less than other areas of the facility. True to their mission, they’d found survivors. Whether Darnold was among them, Benrey didn’t get close enough to tell. Not because he was worried about possibly being recognized but because he was still moping about his lost gamer pad and thus wasn’t in the mood to talk to people right now.

Tommy eventually noticed him though and started approaching. He could’ve left before he got to Benrey’s bench but… it was Tommy, he was allowed. “You, uh… find your stuff?” he asked as sat next to Benrey. “That’s what we assumed you were doing anyway. Gordon was worried but I told him it was okay… probably anyway.”

“Yep, found my stuff but it got bombed so it’s all busted now. Sucks real hard. Got nothing left.” Not even his camera because he’d lost it on Xen after dying and reforming. Whatever was left of the backup in his gamer pad, he hadn’t been able to identify as such.

“Oh… um, sorry. We were pretty successful though. We found some survivors, including Administrator Breen. He’s uh… the big guy at Black Mesa, the boss.”

“I lived here my whole life, dude. I know who Breen is.” Benrey had even met him a few times. “He’s lame.”

“Oh, uh… I guess that makes sense, huh? We never talked about work stuff before though so I wasn’t sure if you knew him. But uh… anyway, because of that, we’re getting paid triple overtime for the whole week. Gordon negotiated it with help from Bubby.”

“Bubby’s getting paid too then?” Wasn’t he in the same boat as Benrey in terms of being a science experiment?

“Yep. He uh… he started refusing to work a while ago apparently until they made him a bank account and started paying him. So he’s been an employee for a some time, meaning um, he gets paid too. We could uh… try to do the same for you. Gordon said not to mention you to anyone in case they wanna try to contain you again. He said the same for Bubby too though but then Bubby got bored of hiding and came out anyway. He threatened to set anyone on fire who tried to put him back in his tube. No one wanted to test him.”

Benrey would’ve assumed Gordon would’ve wanted to unload him onto someone as soon as possible. The fact that he’d specifically said to keep Benrey a secret instead was even more surprising. What was Benrey supposed to do with that revelation? … Maybe nothing because he could go over there and demand to be included in that payout. It had to at least be enough to get a PS3 and a couple games, right? But… what if they weren’t as willing to let him get away with it as they had Bubby? What if the rest of the Science Team weren’t willing to go so far as to back him up in such a move? Tommy would but the rest of them, probably not. If it could be said he was back on their good side at all, it was barely. So it might not be worth trying.

Not that he was scared of revealing himself and thus risk losing his newfound freedom. It was just, without the buff he normally got in the facility and with his gamer pad gone, it would be more boring in here than out there. And the whole confrontation would be annoying. He didn’t want to put up with it.

He tore his gaze off the group in the distance and returned it to Tommy, sitting next to him and smiling. “Nah, I uh… don’t need their money. You have any luck with your stuff?”

“Oh, uh, yeah. The area’s surprisingly not too damaged. All my Beyblades are intact and most of my OSHA manuals too. … A few of them got gooed by… by a zombie or something. Gordon made me throw those away but he promised to buy me new ones as soon as he can.”

Benrey was maybe a little jealous but Tommy and everyone else having all their stuff busted too would’ve been a bummer.

“Um… sorry again about your stuff. I should probably go back over there before they start to miss me. I’ll uh… be quiet about you, quieter than a mouse in a house but I’ll try to let the rest of the Science Team know you made it back safely. In the meantime you might wanna… disguise yourself a bit, just in case anyone else notices you and that you’re not um… you know, human.” With that, Tommy stood and started back for the group.

With a sigh, Benrey shifted not just his hand this time but all his visible skin to match Gordon’s. Having a non-human skin colour was more fun but it did more easily mark him. He changed his eyes and teeth too, making them as close to human as he could. Anyone who took a really close look at him would likely still tell that something was off but not many people bothered looking that closely. Trying to hide as a human was lame and boring but sometimes there was good cause to.

***

The temptation to tattle on Benrey became much stronger with Tommy’s whispered news of his return. Doing so was literally one of the reasons Gordon had started thinking about making this trip. A glance over revealed that he was indeed settled in on one of the out of the way benches. Chances were most, if not all of the scientists in charge of him were dead so tattling on him would perhaps get little more than a ‘not my problem’. Even Breen, as head of Black Mesa couldn’t be intimately involved in every experiment and thus might not know a whole lot about Benrey and thus might not care much. But most of the survivors were scientists and thus not being familiar with Benrey but knowing he wasn’t human might make them even more interested in getting him back into Black Mesa custody. And if Gordon told them they should contain Benrey, they’d probably listen.

If they’d come here even just yesterday, Gordon would’ve tattled immediately. Benrey was dangerous and annoying, containing him again would surely be best for everyone. But… Benrey had spent his whole life as Black Mesa’s science experiment, was possibly even made in the lab. That wasn’t right.

And, on a more personal level, Benrey had played video games with Gordon yesterday. Woke him from a nightmare before offering to give him his hand. Even if it would grow back and not hurt him much, that was still a fairly big offer, right? Then he’d sat and watched Gordon play games for the rest of the night, keeping him company, before apparently letting him sleep on his shoulder on the ride down here. To top it all off, even with the betrayal and fight at the end, Benrey had traveled with the group for a lot of their journey through Black Mesa. They’d been through a lot together.

With those thoughts swirling through his head, Gordon of course eventually made his way over to Benrey. “Hey,” he said in way of greeting upon reaching him.

“Yo.” Benrey looked up at Gordon from where he’d lain down on the bench, his head resting at an awkward angle on the metal handrail. Just seeing it made Gordon’s neck twinge in sympathy because how was that not painfully uncomfortable? He’d also changed his appearance to something more human, probably wise. What were the limits of his shape shifting? Would it be rude to ask? Now, when they were trying to keep what he was secret, probably wasn’t a good time to regardless.

“Tommy told me you couldn’t recover any of your stuff.”

“It got bombed. Fucking assholes.”

“Yeah, fuck the US military, they suck.” Such had always been the case but after this, dislike for them was now personal. “But, uh… in addition to getting paid a bunch for the last like week, if I stay with the company, I’m bound to get a massive promotion and raise. Which means I should have enough money to maybe get a...”

“A Play Station 3?” Benrey interrupted, sitting up. “You’ll buy me a PS3?”

“More like I’ll buy myself a Play Station and let you play on it.” Meaning Gordon was basically committing to keeping Benrey around. That was better than letting him run wild and do who knows what harm to society. The only other way to stop that would be to work with the other scientists to contain him again and that… was also not an option. Somehow the temptation to tattle had died upon coming over and talking to him. “You gotta agree to behave though, no more killing people or… or birds or anything else alive, got it?”

“Yeah, yeah, gotta play by your dumb rules ‘cause I’m broke and have no authority. But you really wanna keep working for Black Mesa? I mean, this place sucks pretty bad now, right?”

“Well, I don’t wanna work in this facility anymore. And I don’t want anything to do with aliens or anything that would require me to wear a HEV suit again. But normal science stuff in a normal lab, I’d be down for that. I’m only twenty-seven so I’m not ready to retire yet.” And not working would give him too much time to think. He couldn’t pretend the resonance cascade and its fallout hadn’t happened but he could avoid thinking about it so much he ended up descending into a panic spiral.

“Guess that makes sense. But you letting me play your Play Station means we’re gonna stay roomies even when you move outta the hotel?”

“Yep.” The polite thing to do would be to add, ‘if you’re okay with that,’ but keeping Benrey from causing chaos was apparently solely his responsibility now – the rest of the Science Team might help but that was questionable thanks to their own potential to cause chaos that he would also have to try to prevent – so remaining ‘roomies’ was non-negotiable. It’d be like having a dangerous animal, such as a chimp or a grizzly bear, as a pet, so maybe not the smartest idea he’d ever had. But as long as Benrey continued to be easily occupied by video games, it would probably be fine.

“Awesome.” And he was apparently pleased with the arrangement, increasing the chances that it would indeed turn out fine.

Now that things were settled and they seemed to be getting along better and Benrey knew Gordon’s lost hand wasn’t a funny joke, it maybe wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Heck, given that Benrey was an alien, creature hitherto unknown to humans, or a lab grown monster, it might even be fun. No longer being in a life or death scenario brought with it the return of Gordon’s general scientific curiosity and Benrey had certainly proven himself to be very interesting from a scientific point of view. Being able to study him – ethically, no poking or prodding, mostly just observing – was a good opportunity. And even if Benrey wasn’t the best and could be actively annoying at times, he could at least distract from worse things. So staying roomies was probably the best possible scenario.

Chapter Six

#hlvrai #Frenrey #benrey #hlvrai gordon

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