#persecution of an as of yet innocent person is likely to make them desperate

[brionnne]

Liar's Den WIP [Working Title, Unfinished]

Almost a solid year (Mar 23rd, 2022) since I started writing and editing this thing, and I planned / plan (?) to do more with it, but I'm honestly not quite sure where to go, and in a way, I honestly think it works alright as a standalone, so I'm just going to throw it out there to show that I do, in fact, write. I had fun writing it, at least, and I hope to make something more of it someday, but...?

Wariness is her natural state. Calculating. Observant. Perceptive. Even then, it isn’t very hard to notice that, out of all the seven deadly sins, she had only ever seen six. No mention of Sloth, of Belphegor, was made—seemingly a taboo topic among the brothers. No wonder why, Morgana thinks now. 

“Why are you trying to trick me? I have eyes, you know.” Her expression turns into a bemused smile. “A brain? I may be a mere human,” she makes mystical motions with her fingers, eyes wide and dramatic, before she drops the act with a scoff, “but I know exactly who you are.” Her eyes flicker towards his fingers, blue-tipped nails, which tighten on the door. Another giveaway, Ana observes. She knows by now that Asmo paints all of their nails, but his are chipping; faded. How long has he been here? As long as I have? Longer? She doesn’t ask him. “I’ve seen your portrait, you know? Even if I hadn’t, your fingernails are painted. That might be fine by itself, but your eyes?” She tilts her head, “Strange color for a human. What is that? Purple, right?” Related to Beel? Internally, she rolls her eyes. Obviously.

His hands slacken. He shrugs, trying to appear lax— a nice imitation, or it would be, except the tightness has moved up. The stiffness of his shoulders makes the action slightly less loose than it should be. Interesting, her eyes narrow. He doesn’t like being called out on this. Why, though?

“You caught me,” he raises his hands in a gesture reminiscent of Asmo. It’s sort of … cute, on him. Intentional? Questions she can’t answer yet run rampant. There’s not enough information to infer much of anything, as frustrating as that is—very. As for his lies, she thinks there could be a logical reason behind them, and while his state of captivity makes him look like a victim in some form, his deception speaks against that. Regardless of logic, the hasty fabrication, the stiffness of his fingers and shoulders, makes her have doubts. He’s certainly capricious—just listen to how even toned he sounds now, compared to his earlier panic—but to what extent? Perhaps further sarcasm would be … unwise.

Morgana looks back up, “So what is it that you want, then, if you were desperate enough to lie for it?” She frowns, gesturing to the door that holds him. “Freedom, I assume?”

For the first time, she sees something like a spark in him. Energy that wasn’t there before. 

“I thought I might get your help,” he says, “if I pretended to be human.” She can’t tell whether this is duplicitous or not. Even a close inspection shows no obvious signs. Perhaps he’s just that good of a liar. Perhaps he isn’t lying at all. It could be both. Insertions of truth, twisted to fit one's liking, have always made lying easier. Harder to detect by a casual, or even careful, viewer. She’s only seen a single tell, and even then, being stiff doesn’t always indicate a lie — it can be normal tensity; discomfort. Plenty of things that make her slow to place any defining bets. He’s shown her basically nothing. 

She had never really given further thought to the implications of Sloth on behavior. Acedia, she remembers, is apathetic. Listless. Lack of care. Her eyes track to his hair — messy; bedhead — to his clothes. They’re barely resting on his frame, and not in the sense of weight, but rather, the jacket he wears is nearly falling off. His shirt — plain, white — is a bit more kempt, but only just. It lifts at his midriff, revealing an un-tied pair of sweatpants that dip low on his hips. He wears no shoes at all, but when she peers in, she can see a pair of long boots sitting in the corner. Effortless. Slip-on. Morgana’s eyes find her own slippers, and she shrugs. Understandable, she thinks. Nice, too. The room itself reflects his state of dress. Untidy. Lacking organization. Her gaze falls onto Belphegor again. He seems, as expected, unbothered. It isn’t like she can criticize that; in fact, it appears they share these traits in common. That being said … 

This … probably shouldn’t bother me as much as it does. Her brow furrows. Regardless, the feeling doesn’t leave. It isn’t very often that she can’t get a good read on someone. Being out of her element like that makes her feel uncomfortable. Most people—even the other demon brothers—are easy enough to read at the best of times. Belphegor …isn’t. 

(Asmo tells her that she isn’t, either. Is that what dealing with me feels like to him? Eugh.)

“I can’t break the seal on this …door,” he admits, scowling. Surprisingly expressive, his hands flutter before it. That, at least, is truthful. There’s no hesitation in his words, no tightness of his frame. His emotions are visible, but not overdone.

“Frankly,” she says, unable to tamp down her bitterness, “I don’t know what you expect me to do about that. I have no magic.” This may not endear him to her, but it’s true. She’s been painfully aware of her status since being deposited here. Even with potential, the understanding of theory, all that becomes useless when she can’t even apply it.

“That may be true, but you have pacts.”

Morgana raises her eyebrows. “And you know about this …how?” 

“Don’t get so worked up,” he huffs, rolling his eyes. “Lucifer told me.”

She snorts. He is cute. Sort of. Shakes her head. “Humor me, then. If I were to free you,” Ana posits, “what is it that I would have to do?”

“If you made a pact with all of my brothers, that would be enough to break the seal.”

She hums. “What do I get out of this deal— I mean, why should I?” It sounds cruel. He could be innocent, she reminds herself. But it’s a genuine enough question, really. Why risk herself? Mammon’s pact was pure luck, and Levi's was borne of some uncanny trickery. Fooled into believing she had won when she hadn’t. He’d been too worked up to realize, and she was, of course, in no hurry to correct him. She was weak here; having something concrete would be protection. “I don’t even know you.”

“Are you—?” His eyes flash. She has to cradle her face to hide the smile this brings. Thumb and forefinger resting on her cheeks. Her hand; a curtain. Neither his apparent anger nor her amusement lasts for very long. “You’re a human,” he says, incredulous. “Don’t you want power—or something?”

Morgana sniffs, fingers coming down to rub at her eternally stuffy nose, “I don’t particularly care.”

He blinks. “Are you not driven by … generosity?” His words are metered, strained, and pushed through clenched teeth; she suspects the word he wishes to have said was not half as nice as the one he had chosen. He’s being careful. It’s notable that he does seem genuinely curious, however. It’s just a guess, really, but this probably wasn’t how he had expected their meeting to go. And it must be weird to meet a human not simply drawn in by that promise of power, especially a power received so idly. A thing that Belphegor is known for accomplishing at a price; a particularly devious demon—manipulative, her textbooks had warned. She’s not sure she wants to deal with the cost of that, really; power and influence are overrated things, anyway—she wouldn’t deny a level of self-motivation in seeking out pacts like Pokemon cards, but. Power is the least of her concerns. Control is a trivial matter. She simply wants to live unburdened, and to do that, she needs to actually be alive. It’s a simple desire; all things considered. Base. Yet she’s curious—for answers no one else would give, she knows. Who would be so forthcoming? Lucifer? Certainly not. There’s clearly something going on here—this attic room, these spiral stairs, up which Lucifer had told her nothing was or would be—and damn it if she doesn’t want to know why this would be worth lying about; if everyone else was lying to her, too. Did Beel know? It didn’t seem that way, certainly, but she doesn’t really know him, either…

“I can be generous,” she reveals after a moment, “but I’m not going to go out of my way if I don’t need to. Plus,” Ana turns her gaze on him. “You’ve given me no reason to trust you.”

. . .

Trust. She falls onto her bed, sighing. How fucking complicated. It’s true that his lies had made her wary, but a part of her — an annoying, shoved-aside part of her — wants to help him. That feeling is as annoying as it always is. She’d been working on this part of herself, slowly but surely. It’s uncountable how many times now that her generosity has hurt her rather than helping, but attempting to be so selfish hurts all those good parts inside her, too. Tears them up and crushes them underfoot.

Tonight, it bothers her so much that it even stalls her sleep. Lying. Rolling. Restless. Why do you want to help him anyway? She doesn’t know, and more than not knowing him, her ignorance of herself is infuriating. She should know this. She should understand herself like the back of her hand. She thinks restlessly. She thinks endlessly. She thinks and comes up blank every time. He’s a stranger, Ana tells herself. He might even deserve it.

“Deserve being locked away?” She murmurs, an uneasy frown twisting her face. “With nothing?” Closes her eyes. It was glaringly obvious how little he actually had, after all. No D.D.D., which she’d already noticed early on. Absence from chats. Communication. Healthy things that were necessary. Isolation. Loneliness. One of Lucifer’s ham-fisted ‘punishments’? It doesn't feel right.

Even without trust, even if he did deserve some form of punishment, could she say that it would be this? Could she condemn him? Because that’s what it would be. Damning. Not helping Belphegor would only mean that he would be stuck there—living in those conditions, alone, for as long as Lucifer saw fit to hold him. Her wariness didn't mean she had to be okay with that by default—didn’t allow her to simply turn a blind eye. It’s true, she knows this, but that doesn’t mean she likes facing it.

#belphegor x mc #obey me belphegor #i wanted to make them kind of contentious and have a moral struggle idk #i've seen so many people talk about the scene and the betrayal of it #but i didn't trust him and i wasn't spoiled either so no outside perspective just vibes #and i thought it'd be fun to approach it like that #and i also feel like ... i would have noticed a picture or something beforehand you know ? like he just fits into my type so gd well #i cannot be led to believe that i would traverse those halls every goddamn day and not spot the emo boy #i am simply built different #and yeah i'm criticizing lucifer in this because belphegor's whole issue was the belief that lilith had actually died #and i just fundamentally disagree with treating someone who hasn't committed any crimes like a criminal #lucifer backed a beast into a corner of course he's going to fucking lash out like what do u expect psychologically it makes fucking sense #persecution of an as of yet innocent person is likely to make them desperate #they've no other options and the worst has already been assumed of them anyway so fuck it right nothing to lose #lesson 16 spoilers #obey me

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

Between the Sky and the Sea

This is simply a fan translation and is not intended as a replacement for the game. Expect grammatical errors.

I tried to draw a line.

Mitsuki: “I want to steal you, too.”

Mitsuki: “I want you.”

Drake: “.........”

Drake: “What’s with that killer line?”

Even though I forcibly silenced her lips to keep her from saying those words, she stole my lips back and crossed the last line.

(She’s too desperate, yet so earnest.)

Her eyes, unwavering as they stared at me, shook something in my heart without clear distinction.

(Ah, damn it. This is so annoying.)

She was intruding into my life, and I foolishly allowed her to.

Drake: “What is it about you that makes me feel this way?”

In the heat of the moment, I bit into her inviting red lips and surrendered myself to the pleasure welling up inside me.

Drake: "I didn't intend for things to turn out like this."

I stared at her, sleeping defenselessly in the middle of the night.

The reason I deceived Mitsuki was to create a casual relationship with her and get her to let her guard down.

Of course, taking her body was an easy option, but considering that the people in the mansion treasure her, I thought it wouldn't be wise to mess with them and become their enemy.

(For me, she was supposed to be nothing more than the woman who held the fate of the future.)

Drake: "Even though my feelings for you aren't that serious, why did I still find you cute?”

I expressed my emotions honestly and gently stroked her soft cheek with the back of my hand.

(A ridiculously trusting and innocent person who can still smile even after being betrayed.)

(There are moments when she annoys me, and yet...)

------------Flashback-----------

Mitsuki: "Even if we are foreigners to each other, we can have this conversation."

Mitsuki: "So I don't see it as an abomination to have a different upbringing, mindset, or race."

Chief Hunter: "What are you trying to say?"

Mitsuki: "This is assuming that vampires really exist."

Mitsuki: "Just like people from various backgrounds coexist worldwide, humans and vampires could coexist too."

Mitsuki: "Maybe you should check for that possibility."

Drake: "........"

(Differences in race are not something to be abhorred, huh?)

(How can you still believe in coexistence, even after witnessing persecution and getting caught yourself?)

???: "I should never have given birth to you, Francis."

???: "Sir Drake is a monster! A monster!"

???: "Poor Drake. He is feared and betrayed by his allies, who see him as a demon and a monster."

The countless words that were thrown at me resurfaced, making me feel nauseous.

(There's nothing in this world worth believing in.)

Though I outwardly mocked Mitsuki's idealistic words, deep down, I knew they were true.

Hunter 1: "It's your fault, vampire!"

Hunter 1: "This time, I'll execute you for sure!"

Drake: "Mitsuki!!"

---------Flashback Ends--------

(No, helping her at that time was just me settling a debt.)

My heart tried to convince me otherwise, but I tried not to think too much about it and sat up from the bed, picking up the shell bottle Mitsuki had given me.

(Star sand and sun sand, huh?)

There should have been lovely sand and seashells inside, yet everything was concealed by shadows.

I could strangely recall the moment when Mitsuki gave me this.

------------Flashback-----------

Mitsuki: "You love the sea, right? Paris doesn't have one, so I made this so you can feel the ocean as much as possible."

Mitsuki: "The sand inside is called star sand and sun sand. They say having it grants wishes."

---------Flashback Ends--------

It probably wasn't easy for her to make it by hand, but she still smiled, happy to give it to me.

Drake: "Wishes, huh?"

(My wish is...)

I closed my eyes and felt anger, resignation, and despair.

Then I opened them again and gazed at her, sleeping peacefully.

Drake: "The fate you bring and the fate I seek will never align."

Drake: "I've warned you, Fawn. This is a gamble."

(Even though you accepted the gun I gave you and called it a symbol of our promise, someday you will point it at me.)

Drake: "You said you wouldn't betray me, but what will you do if I betray you?"

(What will you, who trusts people like a fool, do?)

(I guess seeing how it ends might also be a newborn hope for me.)

Irritation, protectiveness, suspicion一Mitsuki stirred various emotions in my heart, disturbing all the boundaries.

Previous Part ╎ Masterlist ╎ Next Part

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp drake #ikevamp jp #ikevamp translations #ikevamp francis #francis drake #cybird

[dalamusrex]

I'm curious, what makes Sin and Dal work? ewe

Good Question!! And an important one!

Considering Dal:

Distrusts/Fears magic

Fears HEALING magic especially

Is usually naturally distrusting of werebeasts, and

Is barely religious at all

How did he come to love a Werelion who's an Agent of Mara and a healer at the Temple of Mara? If I'm completely 100% honest, when Sinbadaen asked Dalamus for permission to court him, Dalamus initially said "yes" because he was desperate for companionship after his divorce. And perhaps Sinbadaen was desperate in his own way, having thought he had found his Mara-Given Partner in another, but it was not to be. But they chose committment, and the love bloomed later.

They were wary of one another at first! Vampire. Werebeast. To each other, they're one of the few things that could be a threat. Sinbadaen was more gracious about it than Dalamus, tending not to jump to conclusions despite his beast blood reacting. Dalamus, while normally fond of jumping to conclusions as a twisted form of self-preservation, was given very little reason to be aggressive or hostile thanks to Sinbadaen's calm demeanor.

They first began getting to know each other while Dalamus was married to E'hla. Specifically, while Dalamus' marriage was rocky with E'hla. He would go to the temple when at rock-bottom and would pray to Mara despite believing she had no reason or desire to help him. He and Sinbadaen spoke many times on this topic as Dalamus attempted to work through his feelings and issues and make his marriage work. Sinbadaen got to see and talk to Dalamus at some of his most vulnerable moments over the years, and therefore know him just as well, if not moreso, than even some other friends or family.

So Sinbadaen saw what was underneath the prickly mask of Grump that Dalamus so often wears, and he starts understanding why Dalamus is that way. And in that time, Dalamus had learned of Sinbadaen's own struggles with his beast blood. Rather than repelling each other, their struggles as "monsters" brought them together. They knew what it was like to be persecuted for it, especially when their "slip-ups" can have deadly consequences, and were able to offer support to one another.

They both grew up with terrible family situations full of abuse. They know what it feels like. They know what it does to a person, and how it can affect a person. They responded to it in different ways--Sinbadaen becoming withdrawn, subdued, and putting others before himself, sometimes to a fault--protecting himself by remaining unobtrusive but helpful. Dalamus became quick to anger and lash out, selfish and aggressive--protecting himself by hurting others before they could hurt him, also to a fault; sometimes innocent well-meaning people get hurt.

In being extremes, when they come together they can offer other perspectives and bring each other closer to a healthier median. From Sinbadaen, Dalamus has learned how to slow down and think about others' perspectives, to have some empathy, and to be more considerate with words. From Sinbadaen, he gets thoughtful patience and clear explanations without making him feel infantilised, offering grace and gentle correction when Dalamus makes mistakes, rather than punishment.

And Dalamus, in turn, tries to help Sinbadaen have more confidence in himself, to put himself first sometimes. He teaches Sinbadaen that selfishness is good sometimes, that taking care of himself before others is not a crime. Dalamus also hopes to help Sinbadaen love himself physically with intimacy.

And they both assure the other that they're worthy of love, despite their past actions. They both encourage each other to speak their feelings rather than keeping it holed inside.

If Sin is the daytime, Dal is the nighttime. If Sin is the warmth of sunlight, Dal is cool rain. If Sin is a cleric, Dal is a dark knight.

The fact that they're so different and yet simultaneously very similar and compliment each other is what makes me love them so much 💖

#missy rambles #ooc #info #lionofmara #playinglleaflet #thank you for the ask Leafy :3 #fun fact: the person Sinbadaen thought would be his Mara-Given Partner. and the person Dal had an almost-relationship with #after divorcing E'hla. are the same person. but neither Dal nor Sin knew! #i say ''almost relationship'' because when Mina!mod went on indefinite hiatus we decided that it'd be best if #we 'retconned' them having ever been in a committed relationship. so that there'd be less loose ends or grief on Dal's part #feelings were still there and everything but the commitment was never set in stone

[emptyrule]

      “ Humans, and humanity as a whole, are quick to lay blame against another if it absolves them of their own actions. Even if that person is innocent...it matters not to them. The wrong place, the wrong time, they say but that is nothing more than an excuse. It could be the right time, the right place, and still they will do all they can to persecute their kin if it means they are free from all blame. The inherent kindness many speak of means nothing for it is a choice to be cruel. It is always a choice. ” it is a disgusting trait. why hold or place any belief in that another would do what they must, what they should, and not what is easiest? it is foolish to do so. thousands upon thousands of years have taught her better, a harsh truth she learned yet so desperately fought against until fate decided: no more. and only when millenniums had passed did they start to praise that name, yearning for that girl to come and save them from the calamities, from the oh so frightful Winter Queen.

                  it almost made her laugh.

    a soundless sigh passes through pale lips, eyes drifting down to the crocus that encircled her arm like a vine crawling up the broken columns of an ancient ruin. the pain is mild, a dull ache. it is nothing compared to everything else she has felt and perhaps that is why she can withstand it. and if she must bare her thoughts, then at least it is about this. “ Human, faerie, gods, it matters not. They are all capable of the same thing. The indifferent cruelty of the universe is not so far off from the one that is born from their hands, shaped into blades and hooks when it comes to what they want, regardless of if their reasons are...honest or selfish. ” whether to protect those wants or themselves. “ They will convince themselves that it’s the best thing to do, shedding the guilt they feel like a second skin, ignorant to the truth. Then, they will act surprised or hurt or betrayed when that house of cards falls apart with but a breeze. And then....they will blame their friend. Their lover. Or even themselves. Blaming themselves by painting it as good intentions gone wrong when it was only ever for selfish gain. Blaming another for not stopping them, never taking responsibility themselves. They excel at that. To them, the monster is never them.”

       “ It’s amusing, how they call their kin monsters and yet believe themselves to be incapable of producing the same evil. Humans are never the monsters in their stories, their tales, their myths. They don’t stop to question what made the monster but if they did, I doubt they would be too horrified. Monsters are hardly born cruel. It is the actions of others, of the world, that make them into what they are. It has always been that way and always will. Perhaps that makes humans the real monsters.”

@cosmicauo​ 

#cosmicauo #AUDIENCE : COSMICAUO 001 #░ ♛ EVENT : A CROCUS AMONG US #just a normal tuesday afternoon conversation

[foxofthedesert]

So I just finished my 3rd watch thru of Merlin, and yet again am brokenhearted. Not only by Arthur's death and Merlin's grief, but by Morgana's tragic descent into madness. Though I loathed the choice, I always understood why the writers went the direction they did with Morgana. What I did not understand was the way they handled her relationship with Gwen. It just never made any sense to me that Morgana could be so cruel to someone she clearly loved very deeply - even if only in the platonic sense. To me, it seemed like the Morgana that existed at the end of season 2 was replaced by a totally different, inexplicably cruel and insufferably smirky one by the start of season 3.

Still, prophecies need fulfilled and such, and after all it is a fantasy series based on a complicated mythology where Morgana sometimes is portrayed as evil. I just wish it was handled better.

Be that as it may, as a writer I tend to gravitate toward the untold stories within canon. That being the case, Gwen and Morgana's relationship is a natural attraction. I adore their chemistry, which makes them so easy to pair up. Since I am also not necessarily beholden to canon, that means I can imagine whatever the hell I want for them. Such an AU where their potential is realized before Morgause enters the picture to warp Morgana into her father's daughter.

This little piece is part of that. I may or may not add more entries in the future.

As a side note, this was initially supposed to be much shorter, but my fingers wouldn't stop typing words. Silly digits.

Ficlet below the line!

Morgana awoke giggling in an entirely unrefined manner. Her uncharacteristic bubbly mirth, she discovered, was due to a gentle tickling sensation all across her face. Once the wispy haze of sleep was blinked out of her blurry eyes, a familiar shape resolved into an entirely too handsome face wearing such a love-sick expression that her chest reflexively suffused with an affectionate warmth that quickly seeped into her very bones.

“What time is it?” she asked to the person hovering above her, voice still gravelly and slightly slurred from having been roused out of such a deep, blessedly dreamless repose. The pleasant tickling sensation began anew immediately after her half-slurred inquiry, and when she lifted her gaze she was greeted by rich brown eyes she would swear on her life she could live and die in.

“Just after dawn.” The utterly enchanting creature paying her such lovely attention continued to delicately and reverently brush calloused fingertips across the expanse of her jaw. “Sorry I woke you. I meant to let you sleep in a bit longer, I just really couldn’t help myself.”

A pause allowed a full, dusky lip to be pulled rather invitingly between pearly white teeth before her beloved added, “It seems I never can where you are concerned.”

Morgana smiled. A genuine smile, too. Nothing like the false ones she graced her guardian with, full of barely suppressed loathing and rage. Lately she had been consumed by disgust for the man who so many times proclaimed to cherish her, a man who would see her burnt at the stake if he knew who she truly was. Uther Pendragon claimed to be a fair and just king, yet he waged unlawful wars against territories that dared stand up against his brutish rule and relentlessly persecuted innocents whose only crime was to be born different. People like her. People with magic.

Coming to terms with her gifts had cost Morgana both countless nights spent in wakeful torment over horrific visions that plagued her dreams and untold days spent wrestling with throat-clogging anxiety over the possibility of discovery. There were many occasions during that frightening period in which she felt as though tottering precariously over a dark, abyssal chasm at the bottom of which lie only inescapable madness. Every second spent at court was an exhausting exercise in choking down a nauseating terror of the tyrant who held the power of life and death over her and would surely decide upon the latter should he learn the truth about her magic. Meals were a unique form of torture due to the perpetual knot residing in her stomach and every event she would normally revel in was transformed into a dreaded affair during which she could scarcely breathe for the crushing weight resting upon her chest.

Frankly, if it hadn’t been for Guinevere and Merlin she is sure she would have already plummeted headlong into those foreboding depths, right into the waiting arms of a hatred no human heart could withstand without incurring irreparable damage.

If Merlin hadn’t told her the truth about his magic as he lead her to Aglain’s druid camp, the pervasive sense of isolation and desperation worming insidiously through her mind would have inevitably forced her into drastic choices. Even before her magic manifested she had silently nursed treasonous thoughts toward Camelot’s cruel monarch. What might she have done if the walls closed in so tightly on her she felt there was no avenue of escape outside of acting upon those unsavory impulses? It hardly bears thinking about for risk of inviting such evil desires back in to her heart when of all her attributes, it is her heart which makes her most special – or at least that is what Guinevere insists to be the case.

Thankfully, finding a steadfast friend and ally in Merlin had done much to ameliorate the suffocating feeling of helplessness she felt as a member of the court harboring so deadly a secret. With much diligence and patience he was teaching her to control her powers, to harness them for good, and to have faith that better days were ahead for their kind. It was also mostly due to the Merlin’s deceptive wisdom and boundless optimism – and to be fair what reasonable person could resist that impish, dimpled smile? – that she began to view Arthur through a fresh lens.

If she bothered to look deeply, as Merlin insisted, to ignore the chauvinistic bravado and infuriating superiority complex, it was not difficult to recognize Arthur’s innate nobility and compassion that existed despite his monstrous father. And seeing as Merlin was as stubborn as he was convincing, it did not take long for Morgana to accept with a cautiously hopeful heart that with the aid of loyal friends, Arthur had it in him to become to the greatest sovereign Camelot had ever seen, a king who might actually prove himself worthy of the people both common and magical to whom he would be sworn to serve. Of course, she and Arthur still had their mundane squabbles and butted heads frequently over political and legal matters, but in the months since Merlin began her training, Morgana had acquired a new appreciation for the young man who was to her as good as a sibling.

As much as Merlin had done for her, however, it paled in comparison to Gwen’s contributions to her health and happiness.

For as long as Morgana had known Gwen she had held the blacksmith’s daughter in esteem far higher than any Lady should their maidservant. What started out as mutual respect born from shared grief over the loss of a parent soon flowered into genuine friendship. For many years they were the best of friends, each providing for the other a refuge from the storms of life and a confidante more reliable and wise and loyal than could be hired with all of Midas’ gold.

By the time Morgana entered womanhood, her fondness for Gwen had only swelled to become boundless as it was profound. In her eyes, Gwen was the most wonderful person in all the world; none could hope to be her equal in breathtaking beauty, charitable kindness, seemingly endless stores of patience, altogether praiseworthy meekness, a silent strength surpassing steel, or in nearly saintly levels of graciousness. Gwen was the unfailing light to Morgana’s rapidly encroaching darkness, the quickening sun to her deathly pale moon, the Aurora to her Luna. She neither trusted any more deeply as she did Gwen, nor did she desire the company of another so keenly. As a result, they were rarely parted until retiring for bed, and then only by necessity of station. So inextricably attached were they Gwen’s friends often jested that she must have accidentally stitched herself to her lady’s garments at the hip. The noblewomen were not nearly so kind. Some of the more prominent Ladies in the castle questioned the innocence of their arrangement, going so far as to exchange idle speculation which painted them as clandestine devotees of Sappho.

If Morgana could be bothered to care about the rumors, she would have confronted the useless busybodies long ago. But quite frankly, their opinions on her relationship with Gwen mattered for naught seeing as Arthur dismissed them as absurd upon reaching his ears and, beyond even that, Morgana would rather die than provide the snide gossipers ammunition that might serve as tacit confirmation that their unwelcome conjecture was not without merit – which was in fact the case.

All the same, though, she took great pains to prevent them from reaching the ears of the king. Uther already disapproved of their unusual bond and reminded her of such every time she treated Gwen with an ounce of basic human dignity while in his presence. Rather than censure the prejudice as she might have no long ago, Morgana now bore the chastisement with pride. Were it required, she would gladly wear forty stripes upon her skin if that be the price of Gwen’s love. The haughty bigotry of her guardian could never dissuade her from the path her heart had chosen to travel. Gwen was far too precious to ever surrender without a fight, to death if she must.

For what felt like ages, Morgana had believed her feelings would never be reciprocated. And that was perfectly acceptable to her, so long as Gwen remained an integral part of her life. The constant yearning that caused her chest to ache, sometimes almost painfully, was something she could endure so long as Gwen was happy.

That perspective radically transformed the night Gwen’s father died.

The midnight bells sounded in the citadel as Morgana slipped out into the upper town. Her intentions were pure at the time. She had only meant to visit her friend and offer what support she could, no matter the reckless impropriety of her visiting the her maidservant’s home so late at night. Instead, one glimpse of Gwen’s devastation over the pointless tragedy reignited her rage. All too quickly it boiled over, allowing those old, bitter feelings to spill out as impetuous threats of vengeance, and not only on Gwen’s behalf but for all those wronged by the merciless hand of Uther Pendragon. For what felt like hours she railed, heedless of the effect her malicious speech was having on the distraught girl she was supposed to be comforting.

It was only when Gwen – sweet Gwen, kind and thoughtful and selfless to a fault – had been pushed to her limits that Morgana’s perilous vitriol was interrupted.

Casting aside station, Gwen grasped her by the face and made her swear to never utter such dangerous words again.

“My brother has already abandoned me and now both my parents are dead,” Gwen had said, lips quivering and cheeks stained by tears. “I can’t lose you, too. I can’t. I won’t survive it.”

“Of course you would, Gwen. You’re the strongest person I know,” Morgana had replied, grasping reflexively at lean wrists, Gwen’s hands having migrated to the back of Morgana’s neck, thumbs cupped round the front of her ears. It was the first time she had been embraced so intimately, and if it weren’t for her anger she most certainly would have shivered with excitement at the surprisingly welcome contact.

“I’m not,” Gwen had half-sobbed, voice hoarse from hours surrendered to grief. “I’m only standing at all right now because the person I love most in all the world is here with me.”

Morgana hadn’t understood the nature of that declaration at first. Not until Gwen tucked her lip between her teeth, her nostrils flared with what could not be misinterpreted as anything but raw want, and her eyes went impossibly dark. A sharp gasp of realization was all Morgana could manage as a response, so stunned was she that her most secretive and treasured wish was being fulfilled.

But when Gwen nodded, chest heaving with emotion, despair and fear warring with adoration in her eyes, Morgana could no longer contain herself. Suddenly all the pieces of the puzzle fused together, revealing the explanation as to why a simple smile from Gwen was able to chase away the storm clouds gathering above her head, or why Gwen’s chiming laughter kicked up butterflies in her stomach and a captivating warmth in her chest, or why even the most airy of touches from Gwen left a wake of goose-flesh in her skin. It wasn’t just love. It was destiny.

In retrospect, Morgana probably should have been as if not more terrified of crossing that final, socially forbidden line between mistress and servant, friend and lover, than she was of being magical. The thing of it was, the only relevant factors in that moment was Gwen willingly offering of herself more than she probably should and Morgana being selfish enough to accept.

They made love that night beneath Gwen’s threadbare sheets, and it was glorious, just as Morgana had imagined it would be.

All of their sorrows and anxieties and animosities drifted away like dandelion seeds upon a crisp summer breeze. Cliches regarding such unions suddenly made sense. Somewhere along the journey that began by laving the stiffened peak of a pert breast then languidly progressed into nestling her face into the delicate, aromatic flower situated between smooth bronze legs, she lost all sense of self. It was as if with each bruising kiss, playful nibble, and greedy draw with open mouth, she and Gwen were merging into one being. Gwen’s throaty noises and keening pleas reverberated through her every muscle fiber, down even into the very marrow of her bones. Gwen’s intoxicating flavor permeated her senses until it was all she could taste or smell. And Gwen’s gratification became hers as her hand slipped beneath her ridiculously extravagant undergarments to relieve the desperate pressure upon a mound so slick with arousal that the sound of her feverish rubbing was positively obscene.

Mere heartbeats after Gwen went taut with a silent scream, stars exploded behind Morgana’s eyes as the most exquisite mixture of pleasure and pain engulfed her mind and set her nether regions aflame. Spent and unable to control her trembling limbs, she collapsed across Gwen’s heaving chest. Strong arms immediately wrapped around underneath her arms to pull her in tight, and as she buried her nose in the damp curls at Gwen’s neck, all she could do was weep, utterly overcome by an unspeakable joy she understood without needing to ask was fully mutual. They fell asleep like that, Morgana stretched across Gwen, encased in an embrace that felt like a subconscious announcement of a claim upon her, heart and soul and body, something she not only welcomed but reveled in.

Wonderful thoughts about publicly belonging to Gwen lulled Morgana into a peaceful sleep that went markedly undisturbed.

In the pale light of morning she was still so drunken upon pure, heady, all consuming bliss to realize she would be missed if she did make an appearance in the castle. Had Gwen not pointed that out, she would have been more than glad to spend the entire day wrapped around her new lover, discovering every last spot that made Gwen’s toes curl ‘til the girl was too exhausted to move the tiniest muscle.

Alas, the constraints of reality marshaled both of them to action, and so once they had dressed, they sneaked carefully into the castle by auxiliary corridors during the changing of the guard. By only the slimmest of margins, they slipped into her chambers just as the fresh patrol rounded the corner in their direction. Once inside, the thrill of the close call and euphoria over their consummated love invigorated Morgana into a passion she could not ignore. Overcome by a need – more like an almost maddening hunger really – to touch, smell, and taste every delicious inch of the skin she had feasted upon last night, she unceremoniously dragged a breathless, ruddy cheeked Gwen straight over to her bed.

After that thorough christening, they lingered together in a tangle of limbs, both sated and happy. At least until the sound of Camelot’s awakening resounded through the chambers from the courtyard below and with it the first doubts crept in. Morgana could recall the subsequent conversation as though it had just happened.

***************

“I should see to my duties directly,” Gwen had said, immediately rustling to exit the bed upon hearing Arthur’s booming voice rattle down the hallway, clearly a response to the latest in an endless string of mistakes by his loyal yet tragically clumsy manservant.

Morgana hadn’t wanted to turn loose quite yet, so she tightened hold around Gwen’s waist, halting the undesired escape.

“They can wait,” she replied between leisurely kisses trailed up a shapely arm. “The laundry isn’t going anywhere, nor is the evening gown that needs mending. Stay with me a while longer.” She paused to nuzzle into Gwen’s shoulder. “Stay with me forever.”

Rather than struggle, Gwen melted the embrace. “You know that is all I wish for. I love you, Morgana. More than anything. But…”

“But what?”

“What if someone catches us?”

Morgana scoffed, having missed the long term nature of the question in addition to the concern pouring off of Gwen in waves she should not have missed. It was not her finest moment. She hadn’t meant to be insensitive, though. The idea had just seemed so preposterous at the time because she had thought Gwen was only speaking about the present.

“Who would be so bold as to enter my chambers without permission?” she had said. “Not even Uther at his most disrespectful would dare venture such a trespass. We are entirely safe here. No need to worry your pretty head.”

Gwen shifted in Morgana’s arms then so that they were face to face. “I do, though. Worry that is. And I have to ask: why aren’t you?”

“Why should I be? For that matter why should you be?” Morgana replied. And then she met Gwen’s eyes. Large, and impossibly dark, and unmistakably upset.

All of the sudden it was impossible for Morgana to ignore how frightened Gwen really was. In response, her stomach twisted almost painfully and her heart fell as the happy bubble she had been floating in abruptly burst.

What in all the world, she wondered in a moment of regrettable obliviousness, had Gwen afraid of them being caught? Her brow furrowed as deeply as it ever had as she mulled around potential causes.

Certainly they were going to have to be careful in the future to avoid exposure, she reckoned, but Gwen was as fully cognizant that there were more perilous secrets both were currently keeping. Morgana’s ability to pull the wool over Uther’s eyes was well established, and no one else besides the two of them had unfettered access to her chambers. Besides all that, Morgana knew every nook and cranny of the citadel and was able to slip out and into the upper town undetected at will, of which Gwen was also very well aware. So there had to be more to it. But what?

Only one other possibility occurred to her, and it was the one she least wanted to entertain. And yet...

“Unless you regret what has transpired between us?” she asked at length, unable to disguise her own fear, which manifested through a faint trembling in her voice. “No!” Shaking her head fervently, Gwen grasped Morgana’s face much as she did the night before. “Not even for a second. I’ve lost so much, and I have much to regret, but not this. This is the best thing to ever happen to me. I just…”

Again Gwen trailed off, her hands retreating to clasp together against her mouth. And although Morgana’s anxiety had quieted with Gwen’s reassurance, there was clearly something still bothering her.

“Just what?” Morgana prompted, then reached out to stroke Gwen’s hair. “I hate seeing you so twisted up. Tell me. Please.”

A single, contrite nibble of a kiss-stung lip later, Gwen averted her eyes and gave her answer, “Don’t you wonder, even just for a second in the back of your mind, if what we did was wrong?”

Morgana very nearly sighed in relief. This was a problem she could easily remedy, as it was a one she had wrestled with for years only for Merlin’s simple yet profound worldview to unexpectedly resolve.

During the incident where Gwen was accused of using sorcery to heal her father, he had stumbled upon Morgana beside herself after a visit to Gwen’s cell. In her anxiety and grief she had confessed to having feelings for her handmaiden that although unseemly nonetheless had taken hold of her. Where she had expected disgust, she was instead given only understanding and compassion. In that endearingly provincial way of his, Merlin ensured her that love – if true and pure and unselfish, which he insisted hers for Gwen surely was – could never be wrong.

Morgana had felt something turn loose inside her at Merlin’s easy acceptance, as if her heart had been tied into a knot being slowly and perpetually tightened. Breathing became a relief once again. And as she learned to accept herself the way Merlin did, she began to hope that perhaps one day in the future a door would open for her to act upon her feelings without destroying what she and Gwen already shared. She could not have anticipated Tom’s death being the impetus for her to do so. Yet as awful as his tragic death was, it birthed something so infinitely precious that Morgana would never cease being grateful. And if only for the memory of that kind, thoughtful, patient man, she would never stop fighting for the love she shared with her beloved Guinevere.

“Gwen,” she had said, unsuccessfully vying for her conflicted love’s attention. Twice more she called Gwen’s name, and after receiving no response pushed up slightly on her elbow. “Look at me, Guinevere.” When large, uncertain eyes, brimming with tears, met hers, she leaned over so that she could press her forehead against Gwen’s. “We have done nothing wrong. Do you hear me? If you trust me, if you love me as you assert to, believe me when I say this. Something so wonderful and beautiful and perfect could never be anything less than rightly divine.”

***************

That phrase that swiftly became Morgana’s favorite answer to Gwen’s occasional concerns. The world at large, and most definitely those housed within the vaunted halls of Camelot’s citadel, would most certainly view their relationship as wicked and immoral and perverse. If that was indeed the case, Morgana did not believe she ever wanted to be either innocent or righteous. Their love was wonderful, and beautiful, and perfectly divine; an immutable fact which Morgana was determined to never allow either of them to forget.

No doubt lurked within Gwen’s eyes this morning, however, only unadulterated affection. And that made Morgana exceedingly joyful indeed.

“I understand what you mean,” Morgana at last said after escaping that precious memory. She sighed contentedly and shuttered her eyelids as yet another reverent brush of fingers smoothed along the crest of her chin. And while the diligent attention felt incredible, she grew increasingly curious why Gwen’s focus appeared to have narrowly fixated on that one specific region of her face.

“What’s the matter?” Gwen said after a bit of easy silence.

“What makes you think something’s the matter?” Morgana replied, still basking in the glow of Gwen’s magical touch.

“You have that telltale crease between your brow which means something is bothering you.”

This time Morgana opened her eyes. “I’m not bothered, merely at a loss as to why you suddenly find my chin so hypnotizing.”

Gwen sucked at her lip momentarily as if weighing whether to answer before a crooked smile bloomed across her handsome features.

“Well, not just your chin, but if you must know it’s all these little hairs…” And then she stroked Morgana’s chin again, this time allowing her fingers to feather over said hairs all the way down her jawline.

“Are you saying my face is hairy, Gwen?” Morgana asked, frowning as a thread of hurt pulled taut.

As should be obvious, she didn’t appreciate it pointed out that her alabaster skin failed to conceal what otherwise would have been a nearly invisible coat of fine hairs that covered all humans male and female alike. Arthur teased her about it relentlessly when she was a blossoming teenager, and even now some of the noble ladies who envied her would snidely comment upon how it clearly indicated that she was a witch destined for a life of barren unhappiness.

Up til now, Gwen had made no mention of that peculiar feature and Morgana would be lying if she claimed she wasn’t wounded that it would be brought up only now that they were in an intimate situation.

“No!” Gwen’s eyes went wide as the full moon. “No, not at all! I mean...well, yes, it sort of is.” A huffed breath of remorse followed Morgana’s gasp of offense. “Not that it’s a bad thing! I swear I meant no insult. I have some too, after all. It’s just less visible because of my skin tone probably. And don’t worry! It’s nothing like Lady Johanna’s fledgling beard. Not even close. On the contrary, they’re so tiny and delicate and wispy and soft, and I really am utterly obsessed with them because they are part of you and you are perfect, so they are also perfect by extension, and I just can’t get over how adorable they are, and I am currently babbling like a lunatic with zero manners. I am so sorry, milady.”

At the end of that adorable ramble, Gwen’s shoulders hunched in as her cheeks darkened and she yet again sucked her bottom lip between her teeth. Any insult Morgana felt evaporated as quickly as it formed. How could she be upset with such an enchanting creature?

Reaching across Gwen’s waist, she pulled her abashed lover down until they were flush, skin to skin from shoulders to hips.

“Oh, Gwen, there is nothing to be sorry for,” she said, legs instinctively parting as Gwen’s familiar weight settled against her. “My reaction is habit, I’m afraid, due to Arthur’s derisive mocking. It’s actually quite nice to hear a compliment for a change.”

“Are you sure you’re not cross with me? I’d understand if you were…”

No one with a functioning soul could be cross with those doe eyes staring at them, Morgana decided. She danced her fingers with lighthearted mirth across Gwen’s cheeks and over the ridge of her nose.

“Nonsense, sweetling. It’s no different than me admiring your freckles.”

Gwen’s features relaxed into a flattered smile. “You like my freckles?”

“Like them? I love them! How could I not? It’s like you said, they are a part of you, and you are perfect, therefore they are perfect by extension.”

In response, Gwen gave her an appreciative little smile before arresting her hand to place a kiss upon the inside of her wrist.

“So you won’t mind to be awakened like that again should I fail to curb my weird fascination?”

“Only if you won’t should I wake you by mapping the stars written across your cheeks,” Morgana said, then returned Gwen’s tactile affection with some of her own by again acting out her words with her own fingers. She was pleased when Gwen leaned in to the touch.

“I promise I won’t. I think I’d quite fancy that, actually.”

“Then I promise, too. And if you’re a good girl today, perhaps I will indulge your fancy tomorrow morning.”

“Well, then, I’d better get to work, hadn’t I?”

Eyes flashing with eager anticipation, Gwen threw the covers aside and made to get out of bed – a development Morgana was not prepared to authorize. Not only was she of a mind to lounge abed and cuddle away another hour or two, all of Camelot was blanketed in snow and she was loathe to be deprived of Gwen’s heavenly body...heat.

“Now, now,” Morgana tugged at Gwen, almost desperate with a need to curl right back into Gwen’s warmth and never move again while hoping she sounded at least somewhat the dignified noblewoman she was supposed to be. “Don’t be so hasty. Have you forgotten yourself and your duties to your lady? I haven’t yet had my good morning kiss.”

Gwen tumbled back into bed giggling merrily. “For shame! I have failed my lady most unforgivably. I shall rectify the trespass immediately.”

“See that you do, Guinevere, and promptly,” Morgana said, her eyes twinkling as her own merriment curved her lips into a smile. “As you know, your lady does not appreciate being made to wait.”

After a deliberately silly half-curtsy, Gwen draped herself across Morgana’s body, and once settled whispered her reply against Morgana’s already tingling lips.

“My lady’s wish is my command.”

The brief peck that followed was not enough for Morgana. Fingers winding into dark curls, she pulled Gwen into a much more passionate kiss, which lead to another, and another, until the embrace quickly evolved into tangling tongues and undulating hips. Soon enough, Gwen’s head was disappearing beneath the sheets and Morgana was having to recall how to breathe due to the magnificently excruciating pleasure coursing through her loins.

And that was how she came to be late for her first appointment of the morning, where she was relentlessly lectured about the importance of punctuality over manchet, eggs, sausage, and apples sprinkled with cinnamon. It was worth it, though. Her giddy grin throughout breakfast only made Arthur more bewildered and Uther more angry.

#bbc merlin #gwen #morgana #morgwen

[dog-day-morning]

YOU OWE THEM NOTHING

People can be self-righteous when it comes to what they think God is supposed to do if, and when they call on Him. God is not a genie in a bottle that you rub, and a jinn pops out granting you 3 or 300 wishes. The saying faith without works is dead can be applied here. Have you ever heard of or read the book Daniel Webster and the devil? This tall tale or folklore legend was about a man who made a deal with old Slew Foot, and when it was time to pay up he had 2nd thoughts. Satan never plays fair. He's forever putting us in positions where we find ourselves desperate for a quick solution to a temporary problem that only leads to a difficult end. The Latin term for buyer beware is caveat emptor, and Satan knows how to spell. The power of a wicken comes from their basic weapon of spelling or casting spells by word of mouth. Even the Bible tells us that “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Tell that to a Nicolaitan. Those who make deals with the most unclean should expect to suffer in the end. Never trust the father of lies who deals in treachery, and deceit. I look back at my mother's life and wonder if God had ever intervened for her, and fought her battles that surely He and only He would be able to deliver her from, and He has. Life is hard, for many it’s a nightmare that’s ongoing. Satan comes to you when you're at your weakest or most vulnerable in the hopes of snaring your soul into eternal suffering. Jesus comes to deliver us from death, sin, and temptations that confuse us in our trek towards His truth. If you have any aspirations of entertaining people with your gifted voice or your talent for playing lead guitar, don’t sign a contract that promises you the world only to find out you owe them your sweet ass which a man of honor wouldn't consider let alone make you cosign your body for their horn dog appeasement.

Revelation 2:9

9 I know thy works, and tribulation, and poverty, (but thou art rich) and I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Jews, and are not, but are the synagogue of Satan.

You're abundantly rich in spirit Yacob. Now’s the time to claim your position. These bastards have taken everything from you leaving your ancestors nothing but dust. If they could remove us off the face of the Earth they would. They're plotting to do so as you and I breathe, that's why the Father never sleeps. They are demon spawns who say they worship, and believe in God, but whose god, and what righteous god tells you to destroy a people with his blessing knowing what the children of Japheth have done to them historically? The spawns of Satan want your penuche, mouth, titties, and a-hole for their pleasure along with your talent that Justin Timberlake does not have. The new faces of R&B do not look like the people I grew up listening to or the race of people whose songs left an everlasting impression on my bleeding heart that helped me through my ill-fated, miserable existence. Robin Thicke, Christina Aguilera, K-Pop, the BackStreet Boys, and New Kids on the Block. Some of these groups are defunct, but they’re cranking out as many as they possibly can like Justin Bieber, and Demi Lovato. I just saw on YouTube where people were considering if Elvis Presley was Black, WTF?!! He was the biggest culture thief that Dr. Frankenstein, AKA Colonel Parker ever created. Man is cruel; Satan is a whole other type of bastard you shouldn’t entertain. I'm retarded. Some call me an idiot savant. YO MOMMA!!! People are blessed by the Father who has blessed many of us with gifts. There are many of you whom God has endowed with multiple talents that people would sell their soul in order to possess just one. If you're anointed by God to sing like Aretha Franklin may He lead you to sign with a label like Brother Carl Crawford's who won't make the same mistake he did with a very popular artist at this moment. More than likely you'll sign a contract entrusting your talent, blessing, and soul to the most unclean ones. Ain’t a reason in hell you should bow down or bend over for a leach like Mr. Friedman so he can butt bone your a-hole while enriching himself off your God given talents. God blesses those who seek him out, and those that don’t. I don’t know if Eddie Murphy went to Church, and sowed an offering every Sunday to God praying that the Father would make him the highest paid comedic actor in his prime. Richard Pryor was anointed in the womb to be the most blessed comedic talent, and influential comedian to ever walk this Earth bar none yet he and Mr. Murphy pursued their dreams in different ways with both of them becoming world renown. I'm inclined to ask, was it worth it?

Mark 8:36

For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?

The synagogue of Satan isn’t a trending pop culture manifestation that’s to be esteemed, cherished, or envied. These cults are trying to maintain a stranglehold on a world that’s not meant for them or their sort. People who play with Ouija boards or childhood games like Bloody Mary, and light as a feather are ushering dark spirits into their homes leaving their loved ones exposed to something sinister. Get the hell away from me and mine unless you're my sister, AKA Ms. Skunk Funk, who needs to get the crust burnt off her musty, dusty drawers. The whore of Don Juan has a death wish. Explain to me how running with the devil beats walking with God?

Isaiah 59:7

7 Their feet run to evil, and they make haste to shed innocent blood: their thoughts are thoughts of iniquity; wasting and destruction are in their paths.

This Nation was built on our ancestor’s blood, sweat, and relentless faith. Believe me when I say there's strength in every tear. I pray to God that I don’t shed anymore of them. Their wealth is not. It's a stolen Promise that the Father shall reward His children with. Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it. The most glaring, and frustrating example that is also bitter and disheartening I can give you is our Promised Inheritance called Yisrael that the gentiles are squatting on. When a person or in this case a tribe or race of people believe in their own lies they've become reprobate; they're lost.

Revelation 3:9

9 Behold, I will make them of the synagogue of Satan, which say they are Jews, and are not, but do lie; behold, I will make them to come and worship before thy feet, and to know that I have loved thee.

This is what all of Esau's children fear. It's why the bland, colored people of the world are flipping over the Earth's axis, and killing us without any probable cause. They are a lawless people who've displayed their lack of empathy, and humanity for anyone save their own breed, they behave like blood hounds. I've become content with this planet being void of water (Holy Spirit.) Black people suffer from a social disorder called the crab bucket mentality. We hate to see anyone rise up, and we’ll do whatever it takes to keep them down or discourage them. That person may possess something that can benefit the collective, who cares. He who possesses that blessing needs to haul tail ASAP before the winter comes knowing the Father will bless him, and a downtrodden people beyond their wildest dreams. This is why Yeshua, and His Father call us children. It's why I pray, and bemoan to the Father daily that He slays me, putting the fear of the Lord in the heathen and His Son Christ Jesus uses us for His purpose. God doesn't need us, we need Him. He's given us so much power, and authority. When you acquire it, use it for something other than satisfying your sinful, carnal, flesh minded desires. Men, don't behave like horn dogs, and women do not behave as Aholah, and Aholibah, 2 whores.

Numbers 32:24

24 Build you cities for your little ones, and folds for your sheep; and do that which hath proceeded out of your mouth.

Out of thine own mouth you have power to tread over snakes and scorpions. You can exorcise demons and devils out of your present life braking generational curses which is what I' want for a family that's disowned me. To God be the glory. God is telling us to declare a thing, and claim it. What a mighty, just God we serve. Your tongue will become a weapon to use against the lawless ones who use theirs recklessly in their attempts to get us arrested or murdered by local, and federal authorities. You can call it giving them a taste of their own medicine, it isn't. You're reclaiming what they've taken, stolen, including those of us they've murdered.

Isaiah 54:17

17 No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.

The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. Speak positive prayers out loud if you can. If you live with your family or have a roommate pray in the closet. You'll have favor with God that many people won't. They rebuked the Lord, and their anger did tear perpetually, and they kept their wrath forever. When they use their privilege, which is what we call it more often than they, comprehending they’re fully aware knowing they use it with a Demonic, driven hatred. They persecute Black men, women, and children for reasons that are not godly, and the Father does not condone. They, and all the Earth will have to answer for our individual sins against the Father in the end.

Luke 10:19

19 Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

We don’t worship the same god as they do. They're praying to a god to erase us off the face of the Earth. Why hasn't he?.

Exodus 1:12

12 But the more they afflicted them, the more they multiplied and grew. And they were grieved because of the children of Israel.

Their birth rate is dropping steadily. For the first time in the history of the census they decreased in population globally while indigenous, and other races of people stayed steady or in our case increased. This is the reasoning behind these draconian abortion laws. They're trying to preserve themselves while God is eliminating the Earth of their bloody dominion. God is sending the wicked a message before the storm comes, but no one's listening. Their violence towards us is documented, and more often it's unprovoked. They continue with the guilty until proven worthy of their mercy dogmatic mantra which is racist BS. The Earth will be lulled back to sleep. When they're confident that their world isn't in danger of being challenged by anyone, especially us. That's when God will do things that will scare them right back to the caucasus mountains bringing destruction to those who've touched, bruised, and abused the Apple of His eye. Speak life into your angel spirit, don’t entertain the demon seed that's trying to kill you, and the rest of Earth's indigenous people. You have much authority, use it. Elohim. 9/23/2021

[trashcankitty12]

i’m more so curious about faragonda and griffin’s background.. where do you think they’re both from (planet wise) because i think faragonda’s from linphea but i’ve been trying to crack my brain as to what griffin’s origins are and also why do you think they’re from those planets? how did the two friends meet? what was their first interaction like?

I kinda want to stick to my prompt... But like...

I just came up with realms from them to be from.

Griffin is from Rancor, a dark realm near Lunaris and Hoggar. 

Faragonda is from Irrydil, a more... Aristocratic dark realm, which is weird since they’re a republic, but most of the people who live there are wealthy. 

I feel they met at Cloud Tower because Faragonda was going to be Griffin’s roommate. (Faragonda was raised a witch and still has some dark magic). However it didn’t last because during Cloud Tower’s orientation, Faragonda sprouted wings and... Yeah.

A rivalry started after that because Griffin was picked on by the older students because her roommate ended up being a ‘pixie’, which meant she must be one too and Griffin did everything she could to show she was in no way, shape, or form allied with a magic traitor. (There’s also other pressures going on during this time period and it really sucks that Faragonda is suddenly being hailed as some sort of hero or whatever for sprouting wings while the rest of the dark magic users are still being persecuted for bullshit outside of their control.)

And then Griffin started seeing Saladin, who was an older Red Fountain student. (I’m think he’s about 2 years older than the other two are, just going by something Faragonda said in one of the seasons.) But she isn’t going with him because she likes him, it’s more to ‘borrow’ his access card so she can slip into Red Fountain whenever she feels like it. (They have a library section that is surprisingly useful and she enjoys visiting the stables and making alliances with the creatures there.)

Which turns bad because she soon finds out that Faragonda has been seeing Saladin too. (Younger Saladin was... A womanizer to put it in the best of terms... He grew up during the war years though.)

And Faragonda was truly upset/devastated because she actually thought they had something and Griffin was more upset that he cheated period. (Like she didn’t really care about him, but it’s the principle of the thing. And with Faragonda of all people? Her magic counterpart?! WTF?)

So the two start to talk (because Saladin doesn’t realize they know about each other yet), and they come with quite the revenge (which ends up making them more along the lines of frenemies). 

(Frenemies because their friend groups will still mess with each other and pranks are a think, but they will help each other out if need be. Like when a demon was unleashed in Cloud Tower during their sophomore year and Griffin convinced Faragonda to come and help exorcize it, resulting in Faragonda’s charmix because she overcame her claustrophobia.)

And then of course the war starts brewing and they find themselves on opposite sides and Faragonda is constantly trying to Griffin away from the Coven. And it causes a rift because Griffin only joined the Coven to help dark magic users (there was a lot of manipulation and propaganda at this time and there was some major conflicts with dark versus light magic users, thanks to the Council and so... shit happens).

So Griffin sees Faragonda’s hatred of the Coven and the Ancestral Witches as her completely turning her back on her people (other dark magic users) and considering them disposable/less than, and Faragonda is just desperate to find another way to bring balance and peace that doesn’t involve scheming witches trying to take over the entire magical dimesion.

(Once Griffin realizes the Ancestral Witches are planning a genocide of light magic users, and starts to see through the cracks of the manipulation about how the war is really effecting innocent people, she leaves. She fully intends for the Council to put her down for her defiance and treasonous actions, but Faragonda, Saladin, and Marion manage to talk them into letting her have ‘probation’ in which she essentially gives up Coven secrets and tries to actively fight against the Coven in exchange for her potential as a free person.)

#griffinswitch asks #headcanons #winx club headcanons #winx club au headcanons #winx club griffin #winx club faragonda #winx club saladin #world building

[germanicseidr]

Sinterklaas Debate

Zwarte Piet/Black pete is currently a huge discussion in both the Netherlands and Belgium. The faithful helpers of Sinterklaas, who give children presents and joy, are seen as racist by a very small group of people. This very small group of people are ruining a modern day celebration that has its roots in  pre-Christian Germanic spirituality.

I have incredibly fond memories celebrating Sinterklaas as a kid like any other Dutch/Belgian person has, so this issue lies quite close to my heart. That is why I am writing this long post. I will explain in short what the celebration of Sinterklaas is in its modern form and on what ancient pagan belief it is based. My fellow Dutchies are of course aware what Sinterklaas is but maybe by explaining this to non-Dutch people, they will understand better why we love to celebrate Sinterklaas with people dressed up in blackface.

Each year around the middle of November, the saint Nicholas arrives in the Netherlands with his steamboat and a group of helpers called 'Zwarte Pieten'. Nicholas then usually makes a small tour through the city where he arrives and is then greeted by the mayor of that city. Usually everything goes wrong just before his arrival to make the kids fear for their presents. Everything turns out alright in the end and Sinterklaas moves into a castle until it is his birthday.

On his birthday, 5th december in the Netherlands and 6th december in Belgium, Sinterklaas visits every house in the country with his faithful helpers and leaves behind presents for the kids. Only children who behaved well during the year receives presents. After his birthday, Sinterklaas leaves again with his ship back to Spain, his supposed homeland, until he returns again the following year.

Now this celebration is very old and it has seen many changes in the way we celebrate it. These changes were inspired by military conflicts that occured in the low countries during the 16th century.

The celebration of Sinterklaas is based on the ancient belief of Wodan and his wild hunt. There are still a lot of similarities between Wodan and Sinterklaas. Both appear/arrive during November, which was seen as the start of winter. Both arrive with a small army, Wodan is accompanied with the spirits of the dead and Sinterklaas travels with his 'zwarte pieten'. Both ride on a white horse, both are carrying a staf, both are depicted as old men with long beards and both are wearing a long cloak.

Now according to old pagan beliefs, you should avoid Wodan and his wild hunt like the plague. If you were unfortunate enough to see Wodan in the skies, you would soon die and join him in his hunt. To prevent this from happening, people gave offerings to the hunt. The midwinterhorn was blown as well to greet the winter and the hunt, a practice that is still practiced in the Netherlands until this very day. You could per example offer a carrot to Wodan's horse Sleipnir. Dutch and Belgian children give carrots to Sinterklaas's horse Amerigo in present times.

With the arrival of Christianity in Germanic territories, the pagan practices started to slowly die out. The church desperately tried to demonize most of the Germanic pagan customs and sadly Wodan's wild hunt was also on the church's list. The belief in Wodan's hunt was very strong, too strong for the church to completely root out so the Church didn't ban it but simply made it Christian by removing Wodan and adding a real existing saint, Saint Nicholas of Myra.

Saint Nicholas/Sinterklaas was born on december 6th in 342AD in Myra, which lies in modern day Turkey. Nicholas was from a very wealthy family and managed to become a bisshop. According to the church, Nicholas was able to perform several miracles from the day he was born. He was supposedly able to stand up straight in his bath and praise God for the miracle of his birth directly after he was born. He was able to memorize all the names of the stars visible at night as a child and refused to drink his mother's milk on wednesday and friday.

As an adult he performed more 'miracles' which led to the church declaring him as a saint after his death. Nicholas supposedly saved three innocent people from being executed. Another legend tells how Nicholas saved a man from selling his daughters into slavery by giving the man pouches of gold. Yet another story tells how Nicholas brought three students back to life after they were murdered by an innkeeper. This is how Nicholas became the saint of children, the reason why the celebration of Sinterklaas is all about children. Nicholas also saved sailors from storms by calming the seas, is seen as the protector of whores and he freed slaves from a group of Arabic pirates.

Now this freeing of slaves becomes an important subject in the modern day celebration of Sinterklaas because of the 'zwarte pieten'. Who are these zwarte pieten exactly? Zwarte pieten are the Christian version of the dead who accompany Wodan. There are two possible theories on the origin of the 'zwarte piet'. In both theories they are the faithful servants of the saint Nicholas but one theory suggests that these faithful helpers are in fact slaves who had been freed by him. In return for their freedom, they help Nicholas in his quest to spread happiness amongst children. The other theory simply suggests that these helpers are black because they climb into chimneys and get soot on their faces.

Why if Nicholas is from Turkey, does he live in Spain? The answer lies behind a military conflict between the Byzantine empire and the Ottoman empire. The remains of Nicholas were moved to Bari, a city in southern Italy after the invasion of the Ottomans into the Byzantine empire. Bari was once part of the Sicilian kingdom where Charles V was crowned as the emperor of the Holy Roman empire. He was crowned emperor in 1519 and became the leader of a large empire which included the low countries.

Charles V's son would later become the infamous Filips II of Spain. Every Dutch person knows the name Filips II. Filips II ruled over spain and the Dutch territories, he was a loyal Catholic who wanted to root out Protestants. Unfortunately most of the Dutch territories were Protestant. This lead to incredibly high tensions between the Dutch and the Spanish. Add the unreasonable high taxes in the equation and you have a powder keg that is ready to explode.

All hell broke loose in the low countries during 1566AD. Protestants were fed up with the Catholics and the 'Beeldenstorm' started. A period during which Catholic churches were plundered and destroyed. Filips II sent duke Alva to the Netherlands in order to sort out this problem but this only led to a war that would last at least 80 years until the Netherlands became a completely independent country.

During this whole conflict, Sinterklaas was seen as an evil Catholic saint so the whole celebration changed in the North of the country where the Protestants were the strongest. No longer was Nicholas the kind and helpful saint but now he kidnaps children and takes them back to Spain. He beats up children with sticks and kidnaps them away from their families.

It took until the year 1850AD for another huge change to happen. The conflict between Spain and the Netherlands was a thing in the past by now and even if the Catholics and Protestants still hate each other, the persecutions and witch hunts stopped and the Spanish inquisition was abolished by Napoleon Bonaparte. No longer was Nicholas seen as a boogeyman. Jan Schenkman, a Dutch teacher from the 19th century, published several books which showed the first depictions of the modern day 'zwarte piet'.

In the third edition of Schenkman's works, 'zwarte piet' appears dressed in the costume that we recognize today. The clothing seems to have been inspired by both sailors clothing, Saracen clothing and the clothing of servants. The now black servant of Nicholas became incredibly popular and virtually unchanged since the 1850's until the year 2016.

In 2016, a very small group of black people suddenly decided to declare zwarte piet as racist. This is currently an incredibly huge debate which leads to riots and civil unrest. Most Dutch people do not view zwarte piet as racist. Zwarte piet is black because of the soot is an often made argument or zwarte piet is actually a positive symbol against slavery because he is a freed slave, Nicholas did free people from slavery.

I personally do not view 'zwarte piet'as racist. Zwarte piet is part of our Dutch/Belgian tradition and changing an old tradition because some people feel butthurt by black face is a big shame in my opinion. I hope I have been able to give you some more information about the very long history of Sinterklaas and his zwarte pieten and I apologize for this incredibly long post.

Here are photos of: Wodan and his wild hunt, Portrait of Nicholas of Myra made by Carlo Crivelli (1472), Nicholas bringing three children back to life (1500), Jan Schenkman's depiction of zwarte piet (1850), Arrival of Sinterklaas in Purmerend (1885), Schenkman's depiction of zwarte piet that became popular (1885), A comparison between Wodan and Sinterklaas,

#Germanic Paganism #Wodan #Odin #Wild Hunt #Sinterklaas #Dutch #Belgian

[awomanofscience]

HEADCANON: On Carina and "filthy pirates"

・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

TL;DR:

Carina has a Canonically disparaging view of pirates that I believe is influenced by her upbringing within the fold of "polite" society, the fact she's not a perfect character, and her treatment at the hands of Jack and crew. Their shared adventure and her familial connection (via. Barbossa) somewhat challenges this perception. More, positive encounters with pirates and a better understanding of their motivations would do this better. Eventually, I think she'd find certain elements of the pirate's life appealing (freedom from social constraints, fighting back, etc.).

*Longer explanation under the cut*

Throughout Dead Men Tell No Tales and her spin-off novelisation, it's pretty obvious that Carina has a disparaging view of pirates. There's evidence of this everywhere:

Calling Jack a "filthy pirate" during their near-execution

Expressing no moral opposition to his execution, unlike her own ("Kill the filthy pirate. I'll wait.")

Repeating the insult "filthy pirate" several times throughout the film

Refusing to believe one of Jack's crew could have an educated parent ("You're telling me your mother was academically inclined?")

Taking offence to Barbossa suggesting her father was a thief, particularly because he's a pirate ("The memory of my father will not be defiled by the tongue of a pirate!")

Regularly using "pirate" as an insult/judgement of character

Her perception of pirates doesn't really change until towards the end of the film, when she learns that one of the most infamous pirates of her time - Barbossa - was her father all along.

As an otherwise unusually progressive personality, why does she automatically take this view?

Carina is a product of her upbringing in "polite" society

For all the hardships she's endured throughout her life, financial/social hardship isn't really one of them.

Unlike pretty much every orphaned child in her time, Carina is neither condemned to the streets nor to a workhouse. Instead, she's sent to a "children's home" run by a rich and charitable benefactor in the countryside. This is highly unusual for her setting, given that the first real orphanage in the UK - The Foundlings Hospital - was opened in 1741. The orphanage movement didn't really take off until the mid 19th century, and although a few places did exist beforehand, most parentless kids were simply... abandoned. Some went to monasteries, others to work (and likely die) in workhouses. Some ended up on the streets. But very few were admitted into care.

In this care, Carina was also fortunate to get some semblance of an education. She's literate, well-spoken, has a higher-than-average understanding of the world around her, and is even tutored to near-fluency in Italian. The objective of this education is to turn Carina into a young lady worthy of polite society, and who can take up a working position in an upper-class household.

And this is what happens. Her first job is as a maid to the extremely wealthy Lady Devonshire, but she doesn't stay in this position for long. After bonding over their love for astronomy, she's taken in as a Lady Devonshire's ward. This is emphasised to be an elevated position that earns her a room in the estate, relief from her duties as a maid, and even curtseys from the other staff. She's in this role for four years before she leaves for St. Martin, directly before the events of the film.

The point of this context is to show that whilst canon!Carina has absolutely suffered hardship and discrimination (I am by NO means saying that 18th c. orphanages were good places to live), she still had a relatively privileged and sheltered life, compared to others like her, before DMTNT. She was brought up by and lived in "polite" society as a member of it in her own right, and so naturally reflects some of the attitudes that she doesn't yet know to challenge.

Before DMTNT, her perceptions aren't challenged

Carina doesn't live in a period where privileged society understood the links between social/financial desperation and piracy. Until you either lived or saw it for yourself, what evidence did you have to know to challenge the narrative? Carina grew up far removed from anywhere where she could see or experience it first-hand, and had nothing but stories and what she was taught to go by. And let's also be honest - real-life piracy could reap violent and unjustified consequences for innocent people. Without ever meeting a pirate for herself, or having a sympathetic example to relate to, how can see them as anything but the bogeyman?

Carina isn't a perfect person. She's highly flawed, and only truly understands how social barriers have impacted her and influenced her choices. Part of her journey throughout DMTNT is learning how they impact others, too.

Her first impressions of pirates don't exactly challenge them either (tw: sexism, objectification)

Carina's first encounters with pirates include being tricked and thrown off a building, bound and held captive, continuously condescended for being a woman, sexually objectified, and countless other pretty shit things that don't really do much to challenge what she thinks she knows.

Jack's crew treat her pretty awfully and belittle her throughout most of the film, and Jack's has his moments too (undressing scene on the boat, anyone?). I actually take issue with this narratively as a lot of this treatment makes no sense given the events of the previous films. But it's "canon", and it's pretty reasonable for Carina to feel negatively towards the only pirates she's met under those circumstances.

She isn't shown any respect from a pirate until Barbossa gives her the wheel of the Black Pearl, and even then we get that stupid line from Mullroy/Murtogg: "Sir, you wouldn't allow a woman to steer your ship...?"

Honestly? Throughout most of the film, Carina doesn't get to meet a "good" pirate who she can empathise with. By the end, she has both a shared experience and familial connection to begin the process of challenging her perceptions, but little else to take it further.

Do I think her views would continue post DMTNT?

No, I don't. Finding out Barbossa was her father was the first "big" step towards canon!Carina empathising more with at least one pirate. But even then, I headcanon that she would have a really hard time coming to terms with it, and the objectively awful things he's done, once the initial emotion wore off.

What Carina needs is to meet not awful examples of pirates that don't interact with her exclusively with put-downs, discrimination, and objectification, and learn more about what motivates them/the hardships they're often trying to escape. I think later conversations with both Will and Elizabeth would go a long way towards this in Canon, and am hoping to explore this with other characters here too.

I actually think Carina would eventually find some elements of piracy attractive. The idea of living a comparatively "free" life outside of society's constraints, and getting to "fight back" against the authorities that have persecuted her for so long.

BUT, I don't believe she'd ever really be on board with violence and acting against the innocent. Not outside my more "Dark Carina" verse anyway.

Does she take this view towards everything she's taught by society?

Absolutely not. I am not saying at all that Carina accepts all truths as taught by society as being absolute truths, including ones that don't relate to her. She is not discriminatory, or judgemental, and society was (and is) in many, many ways. But it's easier for her to accept "all pirates bad" as truth when there's significant evidence to support it right in front of her.

Summary? It's hard to challenge what you're taught as an absolute until you know how to. Carina does this well in some areas, but not in others - and that includes piracy. DMTNT gave her nothing to challenge her perceptions, so I'm going to do it here instead ;)

#✧ — headcanons #✧ — long post #{ I don't know if I explained this very well } #{ I just think that as much as Carina challenges social expectations she knows are bogus she doesn't know to challenge this one } #{ especially after having bad personal experiences } #{ she knows there's no way a person can be born lesser than another (i.e. being a woman) } #{ but she doesn't yet understand why someone would choose piracy when she associates it with violence and cruelty }

[meta-squash]

Brick Club 1.5.8 “Madame Victurnien Spends Thirty-Five Francs On Morality”

Hugo does this with so many of the societal tragedies in this book. He sets everything up like everything is great and everyone is happy, only to have the facade crumble. It happened with the students/grisettes outing in 1.4 and in the description of the Thenardier children at Montfermeil, and it’s happening now with the description of Montreuil-sur-Mer’s prosperity. Everyone’s so happy and has good income and pays taxes! Oh wait, here’s how the people of this town fucked over one poor woman. (And how many other women have had something similar happen to them because of the nosey people.)

I’m really stuck on the line that Fantine “forgot many things.” She admired her appearance and thought about Cosette and the future and was almost happy, but she also forgot many things. What did she forget? Not Tholomyes, I don’t think, because on the next page he says she thinks of him. It’s such an odd little phrase. I just can’t think of what “many things” she could forget.

Hugo says she rented a room and furniture on credit, “a remnant of her former disorderly ways.” Fantine thinks she’s getting herself back on track, that this renting stuff on credit will be the last time she’ll have to do something “disorderly” and that now that she’s making a living with her own work she’ll be fine. The Hapgood translation is “improvident,” by the way, which I think makes more sense. However I find it interesting that Hugo calls her renting a room on credit a lack of foresight, when really it’s just a necessity out of extreme poverty. She had 23 francs when she left Montfermeil, and I can’t imagine she has much--or any--left when she arrives. Her behavior in Paris, of not taking job opportunities when they arose because of her affair with Tholomyes, I think that makes at least a little sense to call improvident. But not her renting and furnishing her rooms on credit, which seems desperate rather than prodigal.

The townspeople whisper that Fantine “put on airs,” which is the same accusation Favourite had of her back in 1.3.4 while on the swing. Something about Fantine’s odd sort of innocence makes people think she feels superior to them. I was going to say I wonder if this is another way of Hugo insinuating her goodness, but I don’t think Fantine’s “goodness” is the same as Myriel or Valjean’s. Hugo called Fantine “wise,” and I think an aspect about her is that she’s wise on an emotional level, not on a social level. She understands the importance of emotional connection and devotion on a level we don’t see with the other grisettes or with the people of M-sur-M. She doesn’t seem to have any idea about the whisperings going on around her, she has no idea that her child has been discovered until she’s fired. And yet even when she hardens due to her suffering, she never loses the softness about Cosette. Her wisdom is about sacrifice, which is exactly the kind of wisdom that these nosey townspeople (and probably Favourite) lack.

I love Hugo’s condemnation of gossip and rubbernecking. It also makes me laugh because it’s so similar to the way that cops act. This feels like a condemnation of both gossips and cops. What’s the phrase? Kill the cop inside your head? Anyway, he sounds so frustrated and exasperated here. I haven’t read very much further into the Hugo bio, but I’m wondering if there was some rumor or scandal that he personally experienced that made him feel so strongly here.

Hugo’s really hammering home the beauty of Fantine’s hair and teeth here in preparation for two chapters ahead. Weirdly, this reminds me of the Bishop’s silver. Back in 1.1.6 we learn about Myriel’s silver, and it’s mentioned multiple times afterward. When he gives it up, he’s giving up the last thing that connects him to his past life and is put on the same level as any of the poor parishioners or citizens of Digne. When Fantine gives up her teeth and hair, she sacrifices the last two things that tie her not only to her old life in Paris, but to the possibility of success in society as a woman.

So from what I can tell, the Bernardines are a Catholic order also called “Cistercians.” Originally they tried to observe the Rule of St Benedict and focused mostly on manual labor, but later become more focused on intellectual and academic rigor. There was a semi-successful reform movement to go back to old ways in the 17th century. By the 19th century it seems it was mostly dissolved. The “Bernard” of Bernardine was Bernard of Clairvaux, a powerful French abbot who actually wrote up rules that allowed Templar knights to pass through all borders freely. He also encouraged the Second Crusade, though it failed. The Jacobins were anti-royalist republicans who encouraged dechristianization of the country. The Jacobins spoke on behalf of the people but many were bourgeoisie.

So Mme. Victurnien’s ex-monk husband went from being a monk of a fairly intellectual order who observed pretty strict Benedictine rules to joining the fairly atheistic, republican, radical Jacobins.

Madame Victurnien was strict and harsh because her husband was strict and harsh to her. Something I’ve noticed about the way Hugo writes about toxic/abusive/bad relationships between people is how children are affected versus adults. Victurnien and her dead husband, the Thenardier parents, even Gillenormand (with his spinster daughter) to some extent, are all horrible relationships where the treatment of each other means they both turn out pretty awful. However, the same treatment to children (Thenardier parents to their children and even more so to Cosette, Gillenormand to Marius) actually creates an opposite personality. Eponine and Gavroche are both pretty rough, but they’re also both fairly kind in certain ways, which their parents are definitely not. Marius is socially awkward but happy to help when he can. Cosette defies her childhood completely. It’s just an interesting observation that adults abused as adults become abusive themselves while children who were abused have the chance to end the cycle.

“She was a nettle bruised by a frock.” Does Hugo use “nettle” in this metaphor as a verb or a noun? Because to nettle someone is to annoy them, which works, as Victurnien seems to be an extremely annoying individual. But also we have nettles as prickly, stinging plants and as a metaphor from a few chapters ago for the way people become hurtful when neglected. Here we have Victurnien, this nettle bruised by a frock, hurt and damaged by this ex-monk, who becomes prickly and abusive herself. Perhaps with better treatment she would not have turned out this way; but she continues the cycle, beating down others and turning them into stinging nettles rather than them becoming useful.

Fantine is given her fifty francs upon her termination “on behalf of the mayor.” Madeleine is not even Madeleine at all in this chapter. He’s just “the mayor,” as Fantine had been just “the mother” back in 1.4.1. To her he’s this entity that has power over her, that even hates and persecutes her the way the townspeople are. She doesn’t see him, and neither do we; by this point he seems to have relegated factory admin jobs to others, who are then able to make the choice about who to dismiss and why. Again this presents a problem to his rules. People can make up any old rumor or reason to dismiss a person they don’t like or see as morally unfit, and because Valjean doesn’t seem to play as much a part in the running of the factory as before, there’s no way to dispute, except to go to him. And who’s going to go to him, if they feel the same shame that Fantine does?

Fantine is in limbo; she’s told to leave the city but she cannot because of debt. Hugo’s characters in limbo are usually on the edge of an emotional or ethical breakthrough, as with Valjean leaving Digne, Marius just outside the barricade, or Javert at the bridge. Fantine’s limbo doesn’t seem like the edge of a breakthrough, more like the edge of collapse. She really doesn’t have many avenues open to her anymore.

Also, what about sex workers who are more obvious? Later, we see Fantine walking the street in a ballgown. That’s very unsubtle. And, I don’t know, maybe it goes with her sort of social innocence that she would do something like that, but surely there are other desperate women who blatantly walk the streets like that. They haven’t been kicked out of the city. Surely they don’t--or can’t--hide their trade completely. It must be some sort of open secret. I understand that the reasoning for her being banished from M-sur-M is that Valjean has very strict rules, but it still seems so weird to me to set these rules up for some of the city but not all.

Fantine feels shame more than she feels despair. Which. Is a lot. It’s just awful that she has to feel ashamed for this thing that she would have kept hidden if the townspeople weren’t so awful. She has to feel ashamed for the one thing in her life that she truly actually loves and sacrifices for. Which is another parallel between her and Valjean. Fantine feels ashamed not because of her love of Cosette, but because of the “mistake” and stigma that Cosette’s existence implies. Valjean loves Cosette but he always feels a little bit ashamed, not at loving her, but because he feels she doesn’t deserve his love. Despite both of their shame regarding their love for Cosette, both Fantine and Valjean will sacrifice anything for her. It’s definitely a statement about the power of Love, but I think it’s also a good illustration of how both Valjean and Fantine seem to think of themselves as people meant to Suffer For The Good Of Another.

Fantine was “advised to see the mayor; she did not dare.” She believes this was his decision, and not some foreman’s. This is a failure on her part and on Valjean’s part as well. It’s a failure on Fantine’s part because had she gathered her courage and gone, she could have avoided everything that soon comes. But Fantine is so optimistic and sees through rose-tinted glasses, all the way until the moment everything collapses on her, and then she can’t go on. Her optimism doesn’t get her far enough to stand up again immediately; it has to rest first. But more than Fantine’s failing, this is Valjean’s. I assume he gets notified of who is hired and fired at his factory; does he not reach out when someone is dismissed to make sure they’re okay and to see if he can help? Even more of a failure is this rigid system he’s set up combined with his kind-but-mysterious air. He’s so nice and fair that the townspeople see these rules as kind and fair as well, when they’re very much not. But no one--including Fantine--is going to question it because they assume it’s set up in the spirit of kindness. Which I suppose it is, from Valjean’s point of view, but it’s misguided and twisted and ends up being far more damaging than it could ever be helpful.

#les miserables #les miserables meta #brickclub #lm 1.5.8 #les mis #les mis meta

[beneaththetangles]

Every Father Loves His Son

Do you love your father? Does your father love you?

For many of us, the answer to those questions is a given: Yes, of course. But for others, the answer is complex, revealing relationships fraught with complications; or it may simply be a resounding no. Absence, abuse, neglect, adultery, divorce, and so many other actions can cause a child’s trust to break and set a curse upon him or her, one that may take decades to break, if it ever does at all.

Father-son relationships, both good and bad, form a framework for the Vinland Saga anime, and particularly through a negative one during the middle portion of this run. Episode 14 of the series opens with a shot of the bearded and partially disrobed King Sweyn of the Danes, scars crisscrossing his back. The imagery may be meant to evoke Christ, though it’s not the beloved one who went to the cross in place of mankind; instead, this is a terrible and cruel king.

Sweyn’s relationship with one of his sons, Canute, reveals his inadequacies. While he feigns a fear that the boy, whom he sent to besiege the Goliath-like warrior, Thorkell, may be dead, the king is actually hoping that this misfortune has come to pass—he ordered the prince into danger so that he will be killed, leaving the Sweyn’s other son, Harald, to be his successor.

Despite the circumstances, the timid and childlike Canute clings to the image of a good father, one who loves him without condition. Later, after being taken hostage by the pirate Askeladd, who has executed the entire populace of an English village, he kneels before a cross set at their grave, along with his guardian, Ragnar, and Willibald the priest. In a moment of despair, Willibald confesses that he doubts God’s goodness. The normally reserved Canute becomes livid, and says that he must not doubt that the Father is good. After all, as he retorts, “Every father loves his son.”

Later, a flashback helps to fill in the story between father and son. A young Canute has prepared a dish for the king, but it is not received well; Sweyn tosses the food aside, screaming at the prince for acting “like a slave.” Ragnar tries to explain away the king’s action, babying Canute as he always does, but the viewer knows the truth: While Canute is a faithful son, his father is a tyrant.

Later in the series, another father-son relationship, just as unforgiving and abusive, takes center stage. Askeladd, who like Ragnar to Canute, is somewhat a (twisted) father figure to the series protagonist, Thorfinn, recalls his own childhood. His father was a Dane who enslaved his Welsh mother. She is thrown aside and descends into madness, eventually confronting her former master. As he lifts his sword to slay her, the young Askeladd steps in. Impressed by his courage and skill, his father takes him in and trains him, but the scheming Askeladd is just biding his time. He later murders his dad and frames a step-brother.  The recollection is told when Askeladd, pained by the death of his right-hand man, Bjorn, and frustrated with Thorfinn’s continual desire to duel him (Askeladd’s men killed Thorfinn’s father, Thors, years prior), explains more than emotion is required to successfully fuel vengeance. One also needs the wherewithal to follow through fully on his intentions.

Canute stands as witness during the duel between Askeladd and Thorfinn (what would be their final one). By this point, the prince has overcome his timidity and is himself scheming to commit patricide and regicide both, empowered by Askeladd and Thorkell, who have become his retainers. The change of heart occurs as Canute, previously so devout, comes to a realization regarding fatherly love, and decides to rebel against God:

“Is there no love in the hearts of men? Is anyone sane in this world? Everyone’s the the same. No one knows how to love. No one knows the meaning of life. No one knows the meaning of death. No one even knows why they’re fighting. I’ve had enough. I’m sick of it. What we lost in exchange for wisdom, the most important thing, it’s something that we’ll never get back as long as we live. We’ll never attain it. Yet, even then, you still tell us to seek it? Father in Heaven…I no longer seek your salvation. If you will no longer give us salvation, then with our own hands on this earth, we shall create our own paradise.”

Canute sees God’s silence as worth fighting against, and decides to create his own “paradise” on earth, even if it means “becoming a demon” to obtain. That line of thought falls right matches Askeladd’s, who says that no matter who you believe in as God, it’s up to humans to do the deeds, to make change happen. They both seem to believe in the watchmaker theory, that God has set the world in motion and now just observes without intervening.

It’s not reasonable for Canute for Askeladd to think this way. They grew up in a world where religion is hardly is questioned. They are knee deep in the middle ages, with the Enlightenment and its scientific values, offering a further way to think about the universe, almost a century away. And they have witnessed and been party to a violent, unforgiving world. Askeladd fully participates in it, killing the good man, Thors, among many misdeeds in his long life. But most personally, he and Canute saw cruelty up close at a young age from the very men who should be kindest to them, the men who should most closely resemble the kind, selfless Christ. And yet those men killed, waged war, destroyed, and abused them, their family, and other innocents.

And in this madness, what they’ve concluded is that God is silent. He doesn’t deliver the good from the hands of the evil. And so they both spiritually “overthrow God” by killing him, Askeladd literally assassinates Sweyn, the perverted image of Christ, by beheading him. This occurs mere days after Sweyn’s son put his belief in Christ, also perverted by poor theology, to death.

In Shusaku Endo’s classic book, Silence, he, too, investigates the question of “Why is God sometimes silent in times of great suffering?” in a historical setting, but this one hundreds of years later and across the world, focusing on the persecution of Christians by the shogunate as the Edo era begins. As violent as Vinland Saga is, Silence is even more difficult to swallow, as the government tortures and executes loving, kind Japanese believers in front of the foreign Jesuit missionaries that are their true targets. The man at the center of the narrative, the priest Rodrigues, begins to lose faith: How can God allow this to happen? The power to stop it, as is explained to him, is completely in his hands: Rodrigues need only step on the fumie, thus rejecting his faith, and the torture and violence will end.

It would be too unkind, too flippant, to give the typical church response to this question, which is that the suffering around us is mostly due to sin, and that Christ offers us freedom through his grace, though because we live in a fallen world, we may still endure pain—even terrible suffering—until one day when we walk into eternity with him. As much truth as this statement carries to believers, it doesn’t convey the image of a loving God to those who are suffering now. What of the child soldiers in Africa who are victims of violence and turned into killing machines, much like Thorfinn? Of villages wiped out across the world in acts of genocide, not too distant a scene than that of Askeladd’s killing of the peaceful Christians in Vinland Saga? Of parents who abuse their children and families and destroy their lives, as with the fathers of both Askeladd and Canute? The promise of salvation seems too far off, too unreal when someone is trying to kill a young child right now.

I see the rationale in the biblical answer, and I trust in God’s ways. I believe that the fall is our fault, that the terrible things we think and do are because of the sin we’ve committed, the sin done upon us especially by loved ones, and the sins of our society. I believe, too, that Jesus’s death and resurrection means that for eternity, for the 99.99%+ of our “lives,” we’ll live in peace and goodness. And I believe that the kingdom is here now, too, and that when we live like Christ, we can change the direction of our lives and in the lives of others.

But that doesn’t mean that I don’t wrestle with God, like Jacob did; it doesn’t mean that I don’t struggle with my own pains, and see how much more challenging life is for others, and then struggle further. My faith sometimes really isn’t faith at all—it’s a “giving up,” proclaiming that “God is good” instead of continuing to dive deeply into the problem of suffering, which is to say that I would rather follow blindly than consider issues that poke (or spear) at my faith. After all, my faith is imperfect, my mind is small, and my willingness to love is limited—which all means, I suppose, that I do need God desperately after all. On one hand, I’m like Canute, questioning and even blaming God (What response would he have given me had I been one of Job’s counselors?!), and with the other, turning to him in thankfulness and petition because I believe in his truth and have experienced his forgiveness. I am forgiven, but the human in me still fights against the holiness of my new heart and stumbles along the prideful path I’ve carved rather than the narrow but beautiful one God has laid out for me.

I think that, like Canute and Askeladd, I don’t only consider the misery of the present—I get lost in it. I forget both about the kingdom I’ll one day walk into, and also the kingdom now that fights against the evil forces of darkness all around us. Canute blames God and wants to spit in his face, but forgets the blessing he’s received, that despite the abuse at his father’s hands, he was given opportunity to be in a position to help bring peace, one which God would want for us, to a world that isn’t peaceful. The Father desires peace on earth among his creation, while more importantly offering peace to each of us in our hearts, even while we try to snatch that blessing away from one another. But then like Canute, we blame a God who doesn’t snap his fingers to make everything “perfect,” while he is actually here with us fighting by our side.

And in that way, his relationship to us is mirrored in the healthiest father / son dynamic in Vinland Saga—that of Thors and Thorfinn.

This father loves his son and protects him. This father even loves his enemies, punishing them, but still offering mercy. This father chooses death rather than to kill those he rightly should. Thors, now years (and by the finale, some 20 episodes) removed from the tale, is a good father, full of love and justice. And like the Heavenly Father, even though no longer physically in front of Thorfinn, Thors is still drawing him near, with memories of his goodness and visions that encourage him to forgive. The world has been terrible to Thorfinn, but the specter of his dad is even now trying to bring him peace. Why does Thorfinn not kill Askeladd, who he has sought vengeance on after all these years, even when the pirate is dying and tells him to drive the final knife home? It’s because that even though his hateful emotions erupt frequently, deep inside, Thorfinn has started to take his father’s lessons to heart; he has forgiven Askeladd for his crime, and further, as evidenced by how he returns to save the old man during Thorkell’s river attack and by his tears during their final goodbye, even loves him.

“Every father loves his son.” Canute’s statement isn’t true, not even about his own dad, but it is true if you add “good” into it: “Every good father loves his son.” A good father wants what’s best for his child, which isn’t riches, comfort, or even happiness, though the latter is a byproduct of the greater gift he would bestow. He wants to give his child “peace.” Thors walked away from the Jomsvikings because he desired to rear a family in peace, without war and far away from the evil of man. And even now, a decade or more after his death, he still follows Thorfinn, gently pushing to him to make peace with himself and others, to forgive.

And in these visions, Thors also does one thing in addition. He reminds his son of a dream to settle in Vinland, a world not so harsh as their Icelandic home, a land filled with green hills and rich soil. It is a place beyond the horizon, unspoiled by mankind and its violence, where suffering is no more. A perfect place. A land of peace.

The land to which the good father leads.

=====

Vinland Saga can be streamed on Amazon Prime.

#Anime #Christianity #Vinland Saga #Silence #Shusaku Endo #Chinmoku #Articles #Author: TWWK

[williamofwestworld]

Psychology of William- Today I’ve been thinking on William’s psychology and doing some research. I’m always always always a little hesitant to slap the word  “sociopath” on bad guys and call it a day, because it feels a little too easy. It’s like a blanket term that a lot of folks uses when they can’t think of anything else to call them. It also tends to water down the character’s complexity a bit, because a lot of people doesn’t know what it really means and they use it as a word to describe, in their mind, “a bad man, who has ALWAYS been a bad man since birth and they kill people.” That’s not really it...

So let’s take a look at some of the other traits that we do know about William, for a fact, that are found on his profile in the park before labeling him a sociopath:

Persecutory subtype

Delusions

Paranoid subtype

I want to start with the Paranoid subtype (because the others sort of follow along with this). There is a Personality Disorder in psychology called “Paranoid Personality Disorder”, which is closely linked to Schizophrenia, but not quite there. Paranoid Personality Disorder is quite rare and is usually linked to people who have one or two close relatives with Schizophrenia, which suggest that it is more closely related to nature, rather than nurture (although both contributes to it).

What are the symptoms of Paranoid Personality disorder? According to WebMD they are the following:

Doubt the commitment, loyalty, or trustworthiness of others, believing others are using or deceiving them

Are reluctant to confide in others or reveal personal information due to a fear that the information will be used against them

Are unforgiving and hold grudges

Are hypersensitive and take criticism poorly

Read hidden meanings in the innocent remarks or casual looks of others

Perceive attacks on their character that are not apparent to others; they generally react with anger and are quick to retaliate

Have recurrent suspicions, without reason, that their spouses or lovers are being unfaithful

Are generally cold and distant in their relationships with others, and might become controlling and jealous

Cannot see their role in problems or conflicts and believe they are always right

Have difficulty relaxing

Are hostile, stubborn, and argumentative

Most of these fits William to a tee... with the exception of fearing that their spouse (Juliet) is being unfaithful... Unless of course you count William suddenly feeling that Dolores’ love was unreal and she had always been unreal and him driving himself crazy over what is real and what isn’t.

He cannot see his role in problems, he is stubborn, hostile and argumentative, and hold grudges. He doesn’t trust anyone other than himself and often tackles problems head on because he doesn’t feel like he can ask others for help (in fact he often forces others to help, like Lawrence, instead of asking) And he doesn’t take criticism very well. He usually snaps back with something narcissistic sounding like, “I’m a bastion of society” or when he calls Ashley a “can opener”. Another example is when he lashes out against a kid and busts out his teeth when a bully made fun of him and his dad by calling his dad a drunk (this goes along with the takes criticism poorly and reacts with anger & hostility part of it). And he really is distant in his relationships, like he was with Juliet, which costed her. Point being, he fits all of the above.

We also got a good look at his delusions this season, too... who knows what else may have been going on in his head prior to this? 

Since Paranoid Personality disorder is linked to Schizophrenia, I also want to briefly touch on Schizophrenia as well. Schizophrenia is defined as:

“a long-term mental disorder of a type involving a breakdown in the relation between thought, emotion, and behavior, leading to faulty perception, inappropriate actions and feelings, withdrawal from reality and personal relationships into fantasy and delusion, and a sense of mental fragmentation.”

And one of the main symptoms is:

Positive psychotic symptoms: Hallucinations, such as hearing voices, paranoid delusions and exaggerated or distorted perceptions, beliefs and behaviors. (x)

What this all leads to, with William, is that he has always had troubled deciding fiction from reality. Or if the hosts are real or not... and why he desperately tries to grasp onto any reality that makes sense to him at the time. He thought Emily was a Host, ergo he didn’t think she was the real Emily, so he shot his Emily... which led him back to the “Hosts can’t be real” way of thinking, because he had found himself lost in a game yet again, thinking Host could be real. His reality now became... he shot his Emily because he couldn’t tell reality from fiction, so he grasped tightly onto what he thought was real yet again.

And it’s apparent he has been having “delusions” since before season one, going back and forth about the Hosts and even “thanks” Dolores for helping him see through it:

“Clearing me of my delusions yet again. Thank you, Dolores.” (S1xE10)

It’s all really a back and forth with him. It’s like he’s been trying to figure out what reality is as he goes. Like a game or a puzzle... or even with the books that he loved to read ever since he was a kid.

The last thing on the list is “Persecutory subtype” which can be classified as another disorder which produces delusions:

Persecutory delusions are a set of delusional conditions in which the affected persons believe they are being persecuted, despite a lack of evidence. Specifically, they have been defined as containing two central elements: The individual thinks that harm is occurring, or is going to occur.

All of which Ford knew about and took advantage of which pushed William over the edge and caused him to break into the mess you see in season three.

#meta #long post #spoilers

[commentaryvorg]

Danganronpa V3 Commentary: Part 4.14

Be aware that this is not a blind playthrough! This will contain spoilers for the entire game, regardless of the part of the game I’m commenting on. A major focus of this commentary is to talk about all of the hints and foreshadowing of events that are going to happen and facts that are going to be revealed in the future of the story. It is emphatically not intended for someone experiencing the game for their first time.

Last time, as trial 4 (trial 4!!!!) kicked into high gear upon Gonta being accused, Kaito unflinchingly believed in Gonta’s innocence until he suddenly didn’t and then immediately started running away from the truth, Shuichi did not run away from the truth and continued to heroically try and face it, Kokichi completely dropped the ball on emotionally tormenting Kaito over this kind of thing because he was too busy making everything about himself, and Kaito started making arguments he knew weren’t true in an attempt to sound like he’s just being logical and not running away from anything and most definitely isn’t weaker than Shuichi.

We just finished the Debate Scrum, meaning that everyone has (supposedly) acknowledged the possibility that Gonta could have done it.

Gonta:  “But… Gonta telling truth… Gonta… r-really not culprit…”

Himiko:  “I… s-still don’t think Gonta’s lying…”

Himiko also apparently has a decent intuition for this! You’d think Kaito would be the first one to keep stressing this point and not her, but it seems Kaito is too busy hurting over the fact that Shuichi is clearly stronger than him to want to say something that’ll continue to make him look bad at facing the truth.

Kokichi:  “But… didn’t I tell you guys already? If you’re planning to expose a liar, then you have to corner then psychologically… Only then will they reveal their true self as a liar – hiding beneath a layer of deceit!”

Kokichi says “didn’t I tell you already” here because this is him quoting word-for-word something he originally said during trial 2 when he was trying to turn Kaito against Maki, which is a neat callback to that. This trial has a lot of thematic similarities with that one; there’s probably going to be a small bonus ramble about this.

Kokichi:  “That’s why it hurts my heart to persecute Gonta like this!”

I’m probably going to sound very unlike my usual self here, but… I think this sentiment of Kokichi’s might be genuine? I believe this moment is supposed to be a sign of the vague semblance of a decent person deep inside Kokichi clawing its way to the surface for a brief second and expressing the fact that he actually does hate that he’s doing this to Gonta.

I have specific reasons for thinking this that will come up in time, and I feel like I have to mention that to justify this interpretation, because without those reasons, this moment alone really wouldn’t do much to make me think that Kokichi actually means this. He says this literally straight after the previous part that I quoted. Kokichi has not really started to truly persecute Gonta and try to psychologically corner him yet, so if there was ever a moment in which the vaguely decent person inside Kokichi would be forced out of him for just a second, then it feels to me like it would take something more extreme and stressful than this. For the longest time, I did assume that this had to be just another lie, because of the way it’s presented.

Kokichi:  “Gonta! If you understand, then do it right! Make logical arguments for the truth!”

Either way, I said it was “briefly”, because in the very next sentence, Kokichi proceeds to… persecute Gonta, aka do the exact thing that he just claimed it was hurting him to do. Good job shoving that vague decency of yours right back down deep inside you and ignoring it like you’ve been doing this whole time, Kokichi.

From the perspective of the majority of Kokichi that’s just a dick and doesn’t care about Gonta, it makes sense why he’s getting so frustrated now – because he still doesn’t realise Gonta has forgotten everything, and he was hoping this would be a more “fun” battle of Gonta trying to defend himself than simply him repeating that he didn’t do it over and over again. Maybe he’s even kind of unnerved at the way Gonta is still apparently managing to keep up his “lie” of not knowing anything at all even now.

Kokichi:  “I’m sick of hearing you say you don’t know! God, why are you so dumb!?”

Gonta:  “Gonta just wanna help everyone! Like true gentleman!”

Kokichi:  “You’re a true gentleman!? More like a true nincompoop!”

Kokichi’s starting to sound really angry and frustrated here, which is in part him genuinely being frustrated at Gonta not giving the right reactions, but also could partly be a sign that being this awful to Gonta is stressing him out because of the vaguely decent part of him that doesn’t want to be doing this. Which is why I feel that now, after he’s begun to persecute Gonta and do something so stressful that’s hurting him deep down, would be the right time for him to have that moment of sudden stark honesty about his feelings, not beforehand.

Kokichi feeling like this when he’s bullying Gonta but not when he’s been bullying anyone else is perhaps partly down to the fact that Gonta is so open and honest about the distress this is causing him, making it much harder for Kokichi to tell himself he’s not being a terrible person, whereas the other people he’s been jabbing at mostly try to hide how much it gets to them (hi, Kaito). Then there’s the fact that he knows he’s getting Gonta killed by doing this, which is far worse than any of his usual low-level dickery. But it’s also probably in part just because it’s Gonta. Again, more on that later.

Himiko:  “Hey! Now that’s just bullying!”

Kokichi:  “…Bullying? Yeah, so what? That’s what you do in this game, right?”

It really doesn’t have to be. The only person who ever talked about it being necessary to psychologically corner people and persecute them until they slip up in order to reach the truth was… oh, right. You, Kokichi.

Kokichi essentially expressing the sentiment of “so long as everyone else is a bully, that makes it okay for me to be a bully too” sure explains a lot of things about him, by the way.

(Also remember how it was once hinted at that Himiko has been a victim of bullying herself. That might be why she’s the one to speak up to protest about Kokichi doing so to Gonta.)

Kokichi:  “You guys blame and gang up on me, but now you’re going to pretend to be good people?”

That’s one hell of a victim complex you’ve got there, dude.

I can believe that maybe once upon a time in Kokichi’s past (the past that we’re never going to learn anything concrete about because psh, who needs to properly understand why Kokichi acts this way), he was genuinely victimised and ganged upon in a way that he didn’t deserve. That would explain why he’s so quick to play the victim here and act like that’s what everyone else is doing to him now. But no – in this instance, he very much does deserve it. People are blaming him because he told lies that were only going to get in the way of reaching the truth and having everyone survive, and because, even if Gonta did do it, that is very clearly still partly Kokichi’s fault for manipulating him into it somehow (he’s already basically admitted as much). Blaming someone for doing bad things that they very clearly did does not make the person doing the blaming a bad person, especially not in this killing game where doing so is necessary to survive. Kokichi’s just trying to deflect all guilt from his conscience so he can keep telling himself he’s done nothing wrong, despite the fact that he has essentially killed two people and the second of those murders is currently in progress right now.

But no, you brought this upon yourself, Kokichi. If you really hate being blamed and “ganged up on” so much (which here is really just multiple people happening to have the same opinion of him; no-one is making deliberate use of their strength in numbers to oppress him), then maybe you should have acted in a way which doesn’t blatantly warrant it.

Himiko:  “N-No… I never ganged up—”

Kokichi:  “Gonta, argue back already!”

Also note how as soon as Himiko tries to point out that no ganging up has been happening (and if she’s been bullied herself, she should know quite well what real ganging up looks like just as much as Kokichi should), Kokichi immediately shifts back to persecuting Gonta rather than admit that he might be wrong.

Kokichi:  “Just make an excuse or… whatever!”

Kaito:  “Stop it!!! That’s enough!”

Kaito is Done with Kokichi’s bullshit and cannot bear to listen to him continually trying to hurt Gonta like this. I love the way he blurts this out out of nowhere, not to make any kind of argument but just because he wants this awfulness to stop.

Kaito:  “I don’t want to survive if it means I have to stoop to your level.”

Kaito means every single word of this. If the only way for him to survive would be to compromise everything he believes in and become someone like Kokichi who constantly hides their true intentions and is willing to hurt other people just to protect themselves, Kaito would rather die as himself than live as that person.

This is a very important line, and very similar to the time Kaede said, “Do you really think I’d kill someone just to get out?”. Kaede never actually broke those words of hers, and Kaito isn’t going to break these.

(In case you wondered just how relevant to Kaito’s overall story this line is, Heartless Journey, aka chapter 5’s theme aka the closest thing this game has to a theme for Kaito, is playing right now.)

Kokichi:  “Ooh, that’s a low blow right there…”

Yeah, it is. Kaito was simply stating the truth and not actively trying to make it a low blow, because he’s not Kokichi, but given how desperately Kaito wants to live, this is definitely a measure of just how disgusted he is by everything Kokichi stands for.

Kokichi:  “Then just die in a hole for all I care! We wanna live, so stop getting in our way!”

…Do you want to live, Kokichi? I thought your master plan that you’re working towards involves getting yourself killed. If you wanted to live, co-operating with everyone in escaping this place would have been the best way to do that, you know. You’re the one who’s been getting in the way of everybody else’s survival.

(Turns out Kaito is in fact going to die in a hole – one that’s even deeper than the diameter of the Earth. SPACE.)

Maki:  “Quit it. If you don’t shut your mouth, then I’ll shut it for you… permanently.”

Technically, Maki could actually do this right now with no repercussions. Gonta is currently the blackened, so if anyone else was murdered before his execution took place then it would come under the “if there are two murders at once, only the first one to be discovered will count” rule.

Gonta:  “Sorry… It Gonta’s fault everyone so upset…”

No, it’s not, Gonta! Just because they’re arguing over you doesn’t mean that the argument happening is your fault. It’s Kokichi’s.

(And okay, it is partially Gonta’s fault in terms of the Gonta who murdered Miu and gave Kokichi a reason to do this, but that’s not the Gonta who’s standing here.)

Gonta:  “Cuz Gonta not know anything! Really!”

Kokichi:  “Cut it out already! That’s all you’ve been saying this whole time!”

Yeah, Kokichi, maybe there’s a reason for that. Maybe you should have noticed this forever ago, since you’re the one person who knows how he should have been acting, instead of assuming that he’s somehow been an amazing liar (because obviously everyone’s good at lying) until just now when he suddenly became terrible at it.

Shuichi:  “Did… Gonta get into an accident in the Virtual World?”

It’s also interesting to note that literally everyone has been participating in this big argument just now in at least some way (even though Keebo’s only contribution was to tell Maki to calm down, and Tsumugi also only had one line) – except for Shuichi. He was silent throughout the whole thing and speaks up now to present a concrete theory and move the actual logic along. He is very much coming across like the only person here who has their shit together.

Kaito:  “He doesn’t… remember?”

I like how Kaito is the one to most vocally react to this theory, because this would turn everything on its head for him if it were true.

I mentioned this last post when Kaito confidently asserted that Gonta isn’t lying: Kaito’s way of seeing the truth is through his intuition of people rather than through empirical evidence. He believes in people he wants to believe in because him “wanting to believe” happens when his intuition is telling him they’re a good person, and he has enough faith in that intuition that he can basically accept it as fact, even if he has no idea how to explain why he feels that way.

Kaito’s principles about believing in people also make a point that if he gets betrayed, that’s his fault for misjudging someone. But for him to acknowledge that he made a mistake in his original judgement, he needs to see something new in that person’s behaviour that makes him realise what their true colours are – because that instinctive judgement is still how he perceives things.

Both previous times that someone he believed in has been the culprit, that’s exactly what happened. In trial 1, Kaito was one of the first people other than Shuichi to notice Kaede acting in a way that suggested she did it. The only reason he still struggled to accept her guilt was because she was otherwise still acting like the same person who always cared about them, and he didn’t realise at the time that she could have done it for selfless reasons. Plus, crucially, he did manage to accept that she’d done it before her motive was explained, because he could still see that from the way she was acting. And in trial 2, while I’m sure Kaito wanted to believe in Kirumi as someone who’d always been helping everyone, he picked up on the fact that she was determined to protect an “everyone” who wasn’t everyone in here, and from that he could presumably accept that she was desperate enough to kill over it. Not only that, but she was acting considerably more forceful and desperate once she was the main suspect in a way that made it clear it really was her, and while Kaito wasn’t explicitly shown reacting to that, that’s definitely something that would have shifted his judgement of her.

If Gonta remembered committing the murder and was trying to cover it up, there would absolutely have been something noticeably off about his behaviour that hinted at that, something nervous and agitated and painfully desperate that Kaito would definitely have picked up on by now. He wouldn’t have attributed it to Gonta being the murderer until Kokichi mentioned it, but upon hearing that, it would make sense to him. This would still have been a struggle for Kaito to accept, but no more of one than it was in Kaede’s case, where he managed it in the end.

However, as things stand, Kaito hasn’t picked up on any such behaviour that might hint that Gonta is the culprit, which until just now he could tell himself means that Gonta surely can’t have done it, because he’s that confident in his intuition. But now that memory loss has been suggested, suddenly there’s another explanation for why he can’t see any hint of guilt in Gonta’s behaviour that still makes that guilt quite possible from Kaito’s point of view.

Kaito:  “What do you mean he doesn’t remember!? He’s just confused!”

And so Kaito almost immediately goes on to insist that that’s definitely not what’s happening, because Gonta being the culprit would be so agonisingly painful that he just can’t allow it to be possible.

Gonta:  “Memory or no memory… Gonta never hurt anyone!”

Meanwhile, of course Gonta couldn’t possibly conceive of any circumstance in which he would hurt anyone, even having accepted that he might have forgotten about something that happened.

Tsumugi:  “Gonta’s definitely not the culprit!”

Gonta:  “Gonta not culprit!”

Kaito:  “No way Gonta’s the culprit!”

This is also quite clearly the best Mass Panic Debate in the game! All the others just have three different suspects all going “I’m not the culprit!”, saying the same words but meaning three different things with them, but this one delightfully turns that on its head and has all three people saying and meaning exactly the same thing.

The point of a Mass Panic Debate is supposed to be to illustrate how things have gotten so heated that people are shouting over each other, but honestly in every other instance it feels kind of forced that people would get so worked up over being one of at least three potential suspects that they’d scramble to defend themselves so desperately. But in this case it works much better, since there is only one possible suspect right now, and things have already reached boiling point over it. If ever there was actually a time for a trial mechanic based around characters being incredibly worked up, it’s now.

This trial has both of my favourite Rebuttal Showdowns, my favourite Debate Scrum, my favourite Mass Panic Debate, and, as I’m sure you can already imagine, my favourite Argument Armament coming up. Trial 4 is by far the best trial at utilising the full potential of the narrative-driven trial minigames to enhance the drama and character dynamics going on.

Gonta:  “Gonta is gentleman! Gentlemen protect friends!”

How on earth could you put a weak spot on this as if it could possibly be untrue, game. That is just cruel.

Kokichi:  “Your lies aren’t protecting anyone, you know.”

Stop being a dick, Kokichi. You’ve finally accepted that he doesn’t remember; you know he isn’t lying. And if he did still remember and was still lying, then he would be doing so in an attempt to protect everyone. Fuck you.

Tsumugi’s whole argument is also just insisting that Gonta would never hurt anyone, and, again, credit to her for actually being committed to this bit, because it sounds genuine. Everything else about the “character” she’s been playing has been very vaguely defined, leading to her doing stuff like saying she thinks that someone is innocent for no particular reason since she secretly knows who the real culprit is, and flip-flopping over whether a resurrected Rantaro did it in case 3 just to mess with Kaito. But there has been a consistent thread of her being on Gonta’s side this whole time. Maybe he’s her favourite character.

It’s also noteworthy that this would be the first case in which Tsumugi probably didn’t know who the culprit was going into the trial, because this case isn’t her story – it’s Kokichi’s. Still, I think that with her detachment from this whole thing, she probably has accepted that Gonta did it now, especially since it would make the best possible story if he did (and because she’s the only one who currently knows what his motive would be). So she’s just deliberately contributing to the heartwrenching nature of that story by continuing to pretend to be someone who believes in him and can’t bear to think he could kill anyone.

That said, I feel like it would have had more of an impact if the third most adamant person here was Himiko instead of Tsumugi. Gonta helped her quite a bit through her issues at the end of last chapter and the beginning of this one, even outside of the optional bonus scene, so it’d make her character arc still feel relevant if that resulted in her being noticeably one of the most passionate people about this. Himiko does believe in Gonta as things stand, but it’s not really emphasised very much.

Kaito:  “If there was a glitch… it should have affected all of us! But because we’re all okay… that means there was no glitch!”

Meanwhile, Kaito is the only person making a logical argument. He’s not joining in with the insistence that Gonta would simply never hurt anyone even though I’m sure he wants to, because he knows that logical arguments are necessary in order to not sound like he’s running away from the truth.

Gonta and even Tsumugi aren’t bothering to address the memory loss angle, because that doesn’t really change anything about the fact that they believe Gonta would never kill anyone. It doesn’t change anything about the objective evidence which points to Gonta being the culprit either, since the evidence has nothing to do with how the Gonta standing in front of us is behaving. But this means everything to Kaito. If Gonta doesn’t remember, then despite how very definitely he isn’t lying, suddenly his guilt wouldn’t seem so impossible to Kaito at all.

Shuichi:  (I know it sounds crazy, it’s no wonder it’s hard to believe… But… this is the truth…)

Shuichi is still keeping the fact that he’s finding this difficult to accept restricted to his inner monologue. On the surface, he’s just looking like he can face the truth without any struggle at all.

Oh, and – Kaito Refutations: 6!

Kokichi:  “If he mixed the consciousness and memory cords, then there’d be an error with memory. Like… an error that won’t let you bring your avatar’s memories to the real world…”

Kaito:  “Wh-What!?”

I adore that they chose to use this sprite for Kaito’s reaction here. I’m pretty sure he only ever looks this utterly horrified at two other points in the story – after Gonta’s execution, and upon seeing the “outside world”. Kaito has very good reason to look equally horrified here upon realising that Gonta really did lose his memory. Not only does this make it suddenly possible in Kaito’s eyes that Gonta could have done it, it also conversely means that actually accepting Gonta did it is going to be almost impossible for him. Kaito’s way of perceiving and understanding the truth is through his instinctive judgement of people – but if Gonta forgot everything, then the Gonta who actually participated in the events of the case and may or may not have killed Miu isn’t here. If Gonta really did do it, Kaito would never be able to “see” that. He’s just going to have to believe that Gonta did something awful with no “proof” – not what he instinctively uses as proof, that is – and there’s no way Kaito could ever do that.

The out-universe writers didn’t only choose to have Gonta lose his memory because it’s heartbreaking from Gonta’s point of view (and therefore for everyone else in their sympathy towards Gonta) in that he’s technically still innocent – it’s also a crucial part of why Kaito in particular has such a big problem with facing this truth. If it wasn’t for this, Kaito might have been able to accept it.

Himiko:  “I said it over and over!” [gesturing with her right hand] “Right is the hand you hold your chopsticks in!”

Gonta:  [raising his left hand] “Oh, but Gonta hold chopsticks with this hand…”

And here we have the most unique and clever use of a character’s left-handedness in a murder mystery ever.

This isn’t about Gonta being stupid. This is a problem of language. He was raised for most of his childhood speaking his forest family’s language such that he apparently doesn’t know which directions the human words “left” and “right” refer to. When they were talking about where to put the cords, Gonta must have been hesitant to speak up to ask what those words meant because he assumed it was something he was supposed to know and didn’t want to sound stupid and get in everybody’s way. Then Himiko helpfully told him which hand ���right” is, so he didn’t have to!

(It’s actually possible that his forest language doesn’t even have direct equivalents to those words. I gather that there are some aboriginal languages that refer to direction in absolute terms rather than relative, meaning that people will always talk about things using compass directions regardless of which direction they’re personally facing. Your right hand could for example be “your north hand” or “your south hand” depending on which way you’re facing, even though it’s the same hand, and there is no concept of “right”. Maybe Gonta’s forest language was like that too.)

Apparently Gonta is also unaware of the fact that his left-handedness is uncommon, otherwise he would have realised that Himiko might not be talking about the hand he uses and made sure to clarify it. Either his forest culture never really made a big deal of handedness in general, or Reptites are predominantly left-handed, so that Gonta never realised he was unusual for humans. There you go, I figured out some Chrono Trigger lore which is totally canon, right.

Gonta:  “Gonta not even go to this ‘Ver-chew-ul World’ place…”

Tsumugi:  “What…?”

Gonta:  “Gonta fall asleep when he put helmet on… When Gonta wake up… Miu dead… Gonta not know what happened…”

And finally everyone listens to Gonta for long enough and Gonta explains himself well enough for them to realise that, oh shit, he literally meant this the whole time. We could have had everyone figure this out earlier if they hadn’t written Gonta off as stupid or if Gonta had been more assertive about things, and it wouldn’t actually have changed that much about how this trial went – everyone would have just been all, “oh, well that’s awkward, guess you can’t be much help here, Gonta,” and continued on regardless. But having it be revealed only now when the fact that Gonta forgot everything suddenly makes it more believable that he’s the culprit (especially to Kaito) is the perfect way to do it.

Gonta:  “But Gonta try his best to understand. Gonta imagine real hard—”

I know you did, Gonta! You’ve been trying so hard to picture everything everyone’s been talking about and still be helpful!

Gonta:  “W-Wait a minute! That lie! Gonta not kill Miu! Cuz… why would Gonta do that!?”

Kaito:  “Yeah, it’s a lie! I’ll never accept this! And besides! Gonta’s got no motive to kill Miu!”

That’s exactly why this is so goddamn hard for both of them – there is no conceivable reason Gonta would ever have done it based on what they know, and so long as Gonta doesn’t remember (and Kokichi doesn’t tell them), they’re never going to think otherwise.

Kokichi:  “…I already gave you my testimony on how I came up with the murder plan.”

Kaito:  “And I’m saying I don’t believe you!”

Shuichi:  “Kokichi, if what you’re saying is true, why did you plan it this way?”

Hah, I like the way it immediately shifts from Kaito’s overemotional anger to Shuichi’s calm and reasoned logic, showing even more the contrast between the two and that Kaito’s way of going about things is not the right way to do this at all.

Monokuma:  “Only the person who actually commits the murder becomes the blackened!”

Keebo:  “Then there’s no incentive to just plan the murder…”

That’s only if the goal is escaping. If someone wanted something other than escape, such as, I don’t know, to kill two people without any repercussions to themselves at all, then there is absolutely incentive to just plan and instigate a murder without personally carrying it out.

Shuichi:  “But Gonta’s such a gentle soul. Why would he agree to this?”

Kaito:  “Hold on! That hasn’t been decided yet!”

Oh, Kaito. Shuichi’s asking basically the same question Kaito just was – questioning what Gonta’s motive would be – but he’s wording it in a way that implies he’s already assuming Gonta did it, and Kaito’s having none of that.

Kokichi:  “Who cares about the motive? Let’s vote for the culprit already.”

I wonder if Kokichi’s trying to skip ahead to the vote now because he knows he’s convinced enough people already. Himself, Shuichi, Keebo and probably Maki by this point are pretty sure Gonta did it. Gonta, Kaito and probably Tsumugi (as far as she’s pretending) aren’t, and I’m not sure about Himiko, but even if Himiko also isn’t, that’d put it at an even split – which is exactly what Kokichi asked Monokuma about at the beginning and learned would still count as a win for the spotless. (Maybe. That bit was more awkward than I originally thought, actually.)

Tsumugi:  “I care about the motive!”

Kokichi:  “Well, I don’t care. Finding the culprit is more important in this class trial. Talking about the motive is meaningless. It’s not necessary for this specific case.”

It wasn’t necessary for any of the other cases either, but that didn’t mean we didn’t talk about it anyway to put everyone’s minds at ease (or not, in Kiyo’s case). I could go on about how much of a dick Kokichi’s being here, but obviously that’s the idea: he knows that not knowing Gonta’s motive makes this more painful for everyone and he’s trying to make a point of how evil he is. That and if they don’t know Gonta’s motive then it’s totally just that this person everyone trusted was actually a horrible backstabber all along and couldn’t possibly have done it for a reason that meant he still deserved their trust, right? – although admittedly he’s not actively trying to get across that point here, because, again, I don’t think doing so by making Gonta a murderer was ever him consciously thinking about that.

Kaito:  “No matter what you say… I’ll never believe your lies.”

Kokichi’s being an inconsiderate dick right now, but he’s not actually lying, because these are the kind of statements that can’t even be lies. Kaito just can’t deal with this and is lashing out at Kokichi, not even for the well-deserved reason that he’s being a terrible fucking person, but for the incorrect notion that he’s lying about all this, because if he is then that means Gonta’s not guilty and that has to be the truth.

Kokichi:  “Shuichi! You’ll be my partner, right!?”

Shuichi:  (…Me?)

Kokichi:  “Because if you don’t face the truth then we’ll all die, riiiiight? And you don’t want that, do you?”

Oh, finally, Kokichi’s actually mentioning the meaningful point that the real reason Shuichi is doing this is to save everyone. Took him long enough.

Kokichi:  “O-kaaay! Let’s begin!”

Kaito:  “Quit screwing around! I’m done putting up with your selfish bullshit!”

Kaito does not want any of this to happen. He knows deep down that Gonta really must have done it and that if this process of elimination that Kokichi’s about to begin happens then it’ll just become even more obviously undeniable – and therefore even more clear that Kaito just isn’t strong enough to face the truth.

Keebo:  “Kaito, we should listen to his explanation. Our lives depend on it.”

Kaito:  “Grh…”

And then not even Kokichi or Shuichi but Keebo points out that Kaito’s inability to face the truth is just going to put everyone’s lives in danger if anyone else decides to go along with it. Kaito’s not happy about having that mentioned.

Kokichi:  “Shuichi, would you care to explain? I doubt they’ll believe it if it came from me.”

I mean, they should believe it no matter who it comes from, because again, it’d be the kind of statement that’s just a statement of facts about the case and cannot be a lie. But Kaito at least would almost certainly refuse to believe it anyway, using the fact that Kokichi said it as an excuse to run away from the part where it’s still objectively true regardless. However, if Shuichi explains it, even Kaito couldn’t deny it, because Kaito knows Shuichi’s always right about everything, and Kokichi of course knows full well that Kaito sees him that way.

Shuichi:  “They couldn’t get to the crime scene, could they?”

Kokichi:  “The bridge from the chapel to the mansion was gone, and only Miu could pass through the wall. The three at the chapel had no way to get to the mansion, so they couldn’t have done it.”

That said, Kokichi still explains most of this himself, and will do this same thing for all of the elimination steps. All he’s doing is getting Shuichi to essentially endorse his statements so that no-one (not even Kaito) can argue. It would have been more painfully jabbing at Kaito’s jealousy if Kokichi had forced Shuichi to explain the whole thing. Come on, Kokichi, you’ve been slipping on this for the entire second half of the trial.

Shuichi:  (The reason why Kaito isn’t a suspect is…)

-      He wouldn’t kill anybody

I like how this is one of the possible answers to write off Kaito. It’s very true! But… it’s also true about Gonta, and yet here we are.

Look at Kaito turning away like this even though it’s currently being explained why he’s innocent – he can’t be happy about that, not now. Perhaps Shuichi looked in Kaito’s direction while saying his part and Kaito couldn’t bear to look him in the eye.

I would also like to point out that this is not the sprite Kaito had the last time he had a text box, and Kokichi is the one speaking here, so Kaito shouldn’t have changed sprites. They put in another exception to the game’s usual coding on this so that Kaito would be painfully facing away from Shuichi as the camera focused on him here!

(Okay, they actually changed everyone’s sprites in this bit while Kokichi is explaining how each of them couldn’t have done it. But shush, it definitely has the most impact with Kaito.)

Himiko:  “Nyeeeh… Kokichi’s completely running the show now.”

Kaito:  “…”

This is the first time this trial that the camera has panned to Kaito saying nothing and it hasn’t been about Shuichi, and I’m disappointed. Shuichi could be the one running the show right now if Kokichi really wanted him to be! That would hurt Kaito more!

Kokichi:  “My synergy with Shuichi is super on point now, so let’s move onto the remaining suspects.”

Yeah, no, that’s not what synergy means. None of this is the two of you working together to figure out something you couldn’t have done alone. This is just you forcing Shuichi to join in with stating facts that you both figured out completely separately.

Side note: what was Kokichi planning to do here if Shuichi and Tsumugi didn’t completely coincidentally happen to be together at the time the crashing sound happened? …Then again, I suppose Shuichi would immediately have run to the dining room and found Tsumugi there anyway so that’d have been good enough.

Kokichi:  “That leaves only Gonta and me as the remaining suspects…”

Kaito:  “Then you’re the culprit!”

Oh, Kaito. You know that’s not true.

Kokichi:  “So then, it’s down to one person. And who was that again?”

Gonta:  “Uh… Uhhh…”

Gontaaaaaaaa. He hasn’t had attention drawn to him at all throughout this whole process of elimination, but apparently what he was doing during it was slowly breaking down sobbing. Even though he doesn’t want to believe he did it, Shuichi says it couldn’t be anyone but him, and Shuichi is always right, isn’t he…?

Kokichi:  “Weeeell? Who is it?”

Kaito:  “Don’t answer, Shuichi! You don’t need to answer that!”

This whole time, while Shuichi has been unflinchingly acknowledging the possibility that Gonta could have done it, he still hasn’t actually stated for certain that he did. Kaito doesn’t want him to answer because if he does, that’ll make it the truth – after all, Shuichi is always right, isn’t he? Not only that, but it’ll be Shuichi very explicitly and directly facing that truth, which is exactly what Kaito can’t do.

Kaito:  “This is all Kokichi’s trap!”

And this is the only thing Kaito can think of that would justify why Shuichi shouldn’t answer that, even though that possibility doesn’t change the fact that this is what the evidence points towards. This is Kokichi’s trap, but it’s a trap that uses the truth.

It is absolutely evil (in a good way) that the game’s creators make you go into the accusation screen and officially accuse a helplessly sobbing Gonta. Every other time they’ve used that screen, it’s been because identifying the culprit was the player figuring out a new fact that hadn’t been established yet. But we’ve been talking about it being Gonta for a while now. This isn’t necessary at all, yet the writers force you to feel just as awful as Shuichi does by making you do this anyway.

(They also force you to face the truth even though it hurts to do, just like Shuichi is doing. Kaito would have stayed on the accusation screen until the time limit ran out and failed the trial. Or repeatedly tried to accuse Kokichi until he ran out of health.)

Shuichi:  “I-It’s… it’s… Gonta.”

Kaito:  “Sh-Shuichi!?”

Sorry, Kaito. Shuichi really is a lot stronger than you are right now.

The last two times Shuichi accused someone he wanted to believe in (by which I mean not Kiyo, why is case 3 even a thing), he had difficulty doing so and needed encouragement to manage it, from Kaede herself in the first case and from Kaito in the second. But now he can do it not only without Kaito’s encouragement but while Kaito is actively trying to discourage him.

Still, Shuichi clearly had some trouble saying that, so it’s not that he’s doing it without struggling over it! But it doesn’t look like Kaito can see past the fact that he did it at all to recognise that.

Kokichi:  “You get it now, right? That’s the truth we were all reaching for. The thing you guys wanted so badly! A truth without any lies!”

Geez, Kokichi, stop sounding so goddamn victimised over this. The only reason everyone wants nothing but the truth right now is because Monokuma decided that we all die if we don’t find it. They’re not doing it to spite you in particular.

Kokichi:  “Miu Iruma’s killer is… Gonta Gokuhara!”

Shuichi:  “…Ah!”

Shuichi is still struggling a little bit with this! He can entertain possibilities and follow the logic wherever it goes, but his issues still make directly accusing people the most difficult part for him.

This is the one time so far that Shuichi has visibly shown difficulty in facing this truth, something that hasn’t just been in his inner monologue. Ideally Kaito would notice this and it might help him just a little… but I don’t think he does. I think he’s too caught up in the fact that Shuichi can face this impossibly painful truth at all while he can’t. All Kaito’s seen this whole trial is Shuichi being an invincible hero who very clearly doesn’t need his help, to the point that that’s the image he’s projecting onto Shuichi even now that it’s not quite the image Shuichi’s giving off.

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[Next post]

#danganronpa #danganronpa v3 #drv3 #ndrv3 #chapter 4 #class trial #commentary

[thesustainableswap]

Running for Love*

*Choose Love / Help Refugees, to be precise. Since the 2016 Brexit referendum in the UK I have been unhappy with the way my country has been treating immigrants and those coming to build a better life. Racism and hate crimes are increasing and it seems decency and care for our neighbors has fallen to intolerance and hatred. I left the UK in 2019 with my partner to move to France and since then have been educating myself on the climate emergency, the issues with fast fashion and single use items, the unjust way workers are treated under capitalism and the refugee crisis. I am very upset by how closed the world is today, especially when cities like London use the slogan ‘London Is Open.’ We build walls and separate ourselves with borders. We need to come together and help those in need, who are fleeing dangerous situations.

So how are our governments helping, if at all? What can we do to help? These are the main questions I’ve been asking myself and, mostly, I’ve felt pretty useless because I am one person and the scale of the crisis is so huge. Let’s start with our governments first. These are the people we’ve elected to look out for us and our views and have the power to directly impact the refugee crisis.

When it comes to how countries are helping, the answer depends on the country. In the UK, 2018 saw 126,720 Syrian refugees arrive. In that same year there were 45,244 pending asylum cases. For scale, Refugee Action provides the total numbers on Syrian refugees and which countries are helping the most: ‘[There are] 6.7 million Syrian refugees worldwide. Around 4.6 million of these refugees are currently being hosted by just two countries – Turkey and Lebanon.’ So other countries could be doing a lot more to support these individuals. Those numbers are just focusing on Syria, the amount of refugees worldwide is even greater.

‘In 2018 over 70 million people around the world fled crises caused by conflict and persecution. Over half of them were children. The refugee crisis continues to grow everyday. Innocent men, women and children are losing hope, and with their despair comes the inevitable decision; to stay at home and risk their lives or flee in the hope of finding safety elsewhere.’ - The Worldwide Tribe

70 million people sounds like a lot, but if you divide that number between the 28 EU countries (I’m including the UK because at the time of writing this they have not yet officially left the EU) that’s 250,000 people per country. This would help take the pressure off of countries like Turkey and Lebanon. It would also help EU countries like Germany and France who currently have the highest number of asylum applications. So, with the UK already accepting 126,720 in 2018, and processing 45,244 asylum applications, they would have only needed to accept 78,036 more people to help their ‘fair share’ so to speak though it should be basic human decency to help those who have become displaced due to wars and conflict directly caused by the western world.

Unfortunately, the Conservative government have just voted on a Brexit clause which states that they do not need to provide help to unaccompanied refugee children who have family in the UK. As well as this, when an asylum seeker is granted refugee status, they have 28 days to leave refugee housing and find their own accommodation. Most fail and end up homeless. So even after fleeing their country, paying thousands to smugglers, crossing the Sahara desert, going without food and water, being crammed into a boat to cross oceans... even after all of that, the support is not always there. They are treated as invisible people, with no home, no nationality, possibly no family, and left to fend for themselves in a new country.

There are people out there who believe refugees are coming from countries like Syria and Afghanistan to either 1) steal our jobs and take benefits or 2) infiltrate our cities and kill people under the name of Isis or the Taliban. If you believe this, then you are reading the wrong blog my friend. When people are fleeing their country and living through the horrors they have to face daily in order to find safe passage, they are desperate. You would not make a journey like this unless you were desperate. The Worldwide Tribe runs a podcast where they interview refugees and ask them to tell their story. It’s an eye opener to the severity of the situation and sometimes hard to listen to, but the understanding it gives of what people are willing to sacrifice for safety is immense. I am so thankful this organisation exists to hear these individuals.

I am not doing enough. I feel guilty often and want to do more to help those in need. There are a lot of things we can do to help which can include finding and supporting organisations like Choose Love, Worldwide Tribe and Refugee Action by donating money or volunteering. I’m in a position where I can’t just up and go to Calais for two weeks but that doesn’t mean I do nothing. I can learn, educate myself and others, talk to friends and family, write to politicians and, the thing I’m doing right now, raise money!

On March 1st I am running 21.6 Kilometers to raise money for Choose Love / Help Refugees. The charity was borne from the hashtag #helprefugees, which they used online in 2015 to raise £56,000 for people in need. From Help Refugees came Choose Love, a store where you can physically buy items for those arriving to Calais and other refugee camps. Want to provide someone with an education? You can buy them that. Or a hot meal. Or sea rescue. Or medical care. For around £650, you can buy a whole store. I’m aiming to raise £500 (and I’m not just waiting for others to donate, I’m going to be donating as well because asking for others to pay is not good enough, I need to contribute my share.) If you would like to help me get to my target, you can find my page here.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. If you donate, thank you. If you can’t donate, but can share, thank you. Every little helps and refugees around the world need our help. We are all human. This could have been any of us.

Until next time,

The Sustainable Swap.

#choose love #help refugees #refugee action #the worldwide tribe #fundraising #fundraiser #choose love help refugees #the sustainable swap #sustainable #sustainability #sustainable blogger #politics #the conservative party #UK #EU #Brexit #London is Open #refugees #asylum seekers #donation #donate #running #marathon #half marathon #no borders #Syria #Iran #Afghanistan

[southeastasianists]

A year since the guns fell silent, the Islamic City of Marawi is still in ruins. Five months earlier, the Armed Forces of the Philippines (AFP) had launched a desperate operation to capture the head of a terror group pledged to Islamic State. In retaliation, militants from the Maute and Abu Sayyaf groups set churches and schools ablaze, raising their black flag above the ashes to declare the city a new caliphate in the global jihad. Hundreds of thousands of civilians were driven from their homes as the pounding of government artillery reduced the city to rubble. Only when the bodies of Isnilon Hapilon and Omarkhayam Maute, the commanders of the insurgent groups, were dragged from where government snipers had laid them out did the fighting end.

But the war still hangs heavy over Marawi City. Drieza Lininding, chairman of the Moro Consensus Group civil society organisation, said that tens of thousands of refugees from the fighting continued to languish in makeshift shelters, unable to return to the homes that they’d left behind.

“We still have more than 2,000 families – that’s more than 50,000 individual persons – who are still displaced,” he said. “Most of them are scattered around the Philippines.”

The capital of Lanao del Sur, a province of the Autonomous Region in Muslim Mindanao, Marawi City has long been an enclave of the Philippines’ Muslim Moro community. For decades, much of the southern island of Mindanao has struggled for independence from the Philippines’ predominantly Catholic central government in Manila – an insurgency that has seen tens of thousands of lives lost as different separatist groups splinter and unite and fracture once more as the nation lurches towards an uneasy peace.

With the rise of the Maute and Abu Sayyaf groups, violent Islamist splinter factions that have publicly pledged allegiance to Islamic State, the more moderate Moro Islamic Liberation Front has pursued a united front with President Rodrigo Duterte’s administration, fighting side by side with the nation’s military on the streets of Mindanao. Next year, the group hopes to ride the ensuing wave of goodwill to self-rule in January through a nationwide vote on the creation of an independent Bangsamoro state. But for those who watched the Philippine military reduce the nation’s largest Muslim city to a burned-out husk in its fight against extremism, the prospect of peace is looking distant indeed.

Rooted as they are in centuries of Christian settlement in the predominantly Muslim region, these fears have hardly been helped by what critics see as a heavy-handed approach of the AFP that sees every Muslim in Mindanao as a potential soldier in an armed insurgency that has raged for decades. The Moro Consensus Group’s Lininding cited the government’s plan to build a 10ha military base at the site of the siege’s bloodiest battles as a sign that Duterte’s legions had not come as liberators, but as conquerors.

“It’s an invasion,” he said. “Some people are now calling Marawi City occupied. Because for more than a year now, they’ve built this prison – we cannot even visit our home, we were only allowed a few hours by the government to salvage whatever was left of our homes. It’s very sad for us. And the government is declaring this victory – what victory? From who?”

Joseph Franco, a research fellow specialising in counterinsurgency at the S. Rajaratnam School of International Studies, said that resentment towards the military is growing: “Some community leaders are becoming more receptive to the idea that Marawi was a plot to destroy Islam. It is very conspiracy theory-ish but it is not a good sign if some known community leaders are starting to air this out.”

Many of those who have yet to return to the broken spires of Marawi feel alienated from an achingly slow reconstruction process that has seen the Duterte administration reach out to a consortium of Chinese companies that have pledged to help the local business community transform the gutted city into a thriving modern metropolis. For a people who pride themselves on having fought off the imperial ambitions of the Spanish, Americans and Japanese, the prospect of turning over the rebuilding of their homes to an apparently unaccountable foreign power hits a historically raw nerve.

Zachary Abuza, a professor at Washington, DC’s National War College, said that the government’s abortive approach to rebuilding the shattered city had planted the seeds for a resurgence in the kind of armed terror that brought the nation to its knees little more than a year ago.

“The next Marawi will be Marawi,” he told Southeast Asia Globe. “The residents and IDPs [internally displaced persons] remain seething with the government’s mishandling of reconstruction. This will not end well for the government. The appropriation of land for a large military base to provide security will only fuel resentment and insecurity. It is hard to imagine the government’s handling of this being much worse.”

Abuza was also scathing in his assessment of the Armed Forces of the Philippines’ unchecked devastation of the city, unleashing the full might of its artillery on both militant and moderate alike.

“My takeaway about the AFP is that they remain poorly trained and led,” he said. “They continue to use artillery as a counterterrorism tactic, which is why Marawi looked like Raqqa. They do this in central Mindanao all the time, knowing all too well that it will lead to civilian casualties. And they engaged in some looting in Marawi, which doesn’t help their public image.”

But for many of those who still rankle at the military’s excesses, the ongoing imposition of martial law across the entire Mindanao region makes any criticism of military rule untenable. Speaking to local media, University of the Philippines former law dean Pacifico Agabin said that Duterte’s decision to declare martial law gave the armed forces almost unlimited power over the people of Marawi.

“If the privilege of the writ of habeas corpus is suspended, you cannot hold public meetings and speak against the government. Complete silence,” he said. “You cannot travel to the area where there’s fighting. Freedom of movement can also be suspended in places which the military determines [as unsafe].”

Lininding argued that the military were using the cover of martial law to suppress the rights of the local people.

“Why is martial law still in place? The fighting was settled almost a year ago,” he said. “Who are the enemies? Are we the enemies? We know that they want to suppress us, to instil fear among the people so we will turn a blind eye to whatever they’re doing. Because of the martial law, we can do so little. We cannot protest, we can only do so much on social media.”

Nor is it even clear how many innocent lives were lost during the street fighting, with initial reports of fewer than 300 Maute fighters slain rising to almost 1,000 when the fighting ended. With no reliable investigation into the number of dead, Lininding said, it was impossible to say just how many of the so-called terrorists killed in the assault had actually been members of Islamist groups.

“Until now, there is no clear data on how many civilians were killed at ground zero,” he said. “This is also a concern – some people are afraid to come forward and say, ‘My relative was lost in ground zero’ because the military might accuse their family or their loved ones of being Isis sympathisers or Isis members. We are being persecuted – and we can do so little.”

Perhaps most worrying is the perverse financial incentive that the outright war against Islamist terror – or Muslim independence – in Mindanao has created for the nation’s armed forces. Although the US has long supported the government’s counterterror operations in the Philippines’ restive south, the spectacle of a Philippine city under siege by Isis-linked militants has drawn increased financing for counterterror operations from as far afield as Singapore, Japan and Australia. Abuza said this surge in funding had created a moral hazard for a military already bloated by billions of dollars siphoned from international donors over the years – much of which was used mainly for personnel costs.

“They have no incentive to end the conflicts,” he said. “They are gravy trains. We need to ask very hard questions about corruption within the AFP. Where the hell did the Mautes and the Abu Sayyaf group get enough guns and ammunition for a five-month siege?”

It is a question the Duterte administration cannot afford to ignore. Pointing to a series of recent skirmishes between the military and remnants of the Maute group, Abuza said he believed the war for Mawari was far from over.

“Marawi has once again put the Philippines at the centre of counterterrorism in Southeast Asia. It is the only place that militants can actually hold territory,” he said, adding that it was not yet clear whether the Middle East-based Islamic State was prepared to declare a formal caliphate-linked territory within Southeast Asia. “But it is clear that the militants in the region want it declared. To that end, foreign fighters will continue to make their way into the southern Philippines.”

#Southeast Asia #Philippines #Marawi #Religious Extremism

[silentauroriamthereal]

I hate Mary Morsan too

When I first saw this, I thought about just saying something like, “yay, high five!”, but then I reconsidered. Expressing hate for any woman, even a fictional one, is always a bit troubling for me. I truly am a feminist to the core of my being, and as someone who is known for writing the character of Mary as I truly see her in the canon, I’m already uncomfortably aware that people see me as a Mary hater. Johnlock shippers have been getting this since 2014 now: if you hate Mary, it’s only because she gets in the way of your ship, and the Johnlockers hate all of the female characters in Sherlock.

The second is patently untrue. That said, I’ll allow that Moffat and Gatiss are notoriously poor at writing female characters. (This has been well covered in many articles.) They, Moffat in particular, have a troubling way of aligning the concepts of female power with abuse (Irene uses sex to extort people for the terrorist she works for, Mary shoots people when they threaten to show her for the assassin and criminal that she is, even Molly and Mrs Hudson resort to violence in so-called moments of “strength” - Molly with her slapping and Mrs Hudson pulling a gun and handcuffs on Sherlock before having a bunch of men throw him into the trunk of her car). Moffat and Gatiss have an issue when it comes to writing a well-rounded, believable female character whose entire purpose doesn’t revolve around the male main character(s) and doesn’t come off as… well, a man trying to write a woman. That said, filling things out and making them work is also part of the joy of writing fanfic, and I, along with many other Johnlock writers, have definitely done my best to do that. I’ve even given several women on Sherlock their own stand-alone stories, told from their points of view, even Mary! If you’re curious: 

Janine POV: The Green Carnations

Mary POV: Moving on/Making do (split between Mary and John’s POVs), Stand-in, Want (split between Sherlock, John, and Mary’s POVs)

Molly POV: The Red Roses, The Clouded Eye (split between Molly and Sherlock’s POV)

Sally Donovan & Mrs Hudson POV (first and last sections of Inappropriate)

Irene (not her POV, but definitely featuring her): From the Bottom of the Well

I’ve done my best to round these women out and give them credit where credit is due, whether or not I personally like them. I didn’t make them two-dimensional. And I didn’t write them the same every time (for those whose POVs I wrote more than once), either! Molly in The Red Roses is vulnerable, strong, self-sacrificing, and brave. Molly in The Clouded Eye is manipulable, jealous, possessive, yet (I hope) still understandable, pitiable. The point, ultimately, is the same as with any character: to be able to see their complexities, their depth, and to observe their actions objectively. 

People wanted so badly to like Mary. They wanted to love the strong woman that John Watson chose to marry. I didn’t see any hate leading up to series 3 at all, neither toward the character of Mary Morstan, nor toward the person who played her. I saw open-mindedness and a wiliingness to take her into the collective fandom heart. For me, I was always wary, I’ll admit. I thought from the start that it was a mistake to take such a miniscule role from the original canon and make it such a big deal. I thought then that Moffat and Gatiss were trying to stomp out the Johnlock ship and rumours of their queer-baiting. Surely if John got married, we couldn’t possibly see it as gay anymore, right??? I saw their choice of actor as a deliberate attempt to parry the natural chemistry Benedict and Martin have onscreen, and I thought then that it was an overly desperate attempt. I maintain that to this day: I think it backfired. But that generosity of spirit was there toward Mary, even after series 3, for the most part. I saw many, mahy Johnlockers try to include Mary as part of a newly-formed OT3. I saw them identifying with Mary, trying their very best to love her. 

Many of them still may. I don’t. For me, feminism means being seen as a human being first, and if a person’s experience as that type of human being has meant some kind of persecution or prejudice or abuse, it helps understand their actions. But not to excuse them. It doesn’t make it okay to murder people if you manage to look cute while doing it. It doesn’t make it okay if you did it to protect your own interests. That’s just selfishness, and defending it isn’t feminism. That’s just making excuses. Mary is a person who, in some unexplained backstory, chose a career wherein she kills and gets paid for it. She worked, to quote her, for the highest bidder. It wasn’t something she did out of a moral position, for love of country, for self-defense, for a cause, however just, as a cog in some great war machine. She didn’t do it do defend people she loved, or innocent bystanders, or children, or people too weak to defend themselves. She didn’t do it for some satisfying and long-deserved vengeance: she did it for money. Tawdry, dirty, blood money. And then she built a mountain of deceit, fed it to a man who was grieving, his trust broken and all but lost, and sold him a house of lies. And when his clever best friend discovered her, she shot him in cold blood, threatened him while under the influence, and hunted him down like an animal to put an end to him. 

Pardon me if I don’t find that “cute” or “strong” or anything I feel like modelling myself after, anything I would want young women or my own nieces to look up to and admire. 

I’ve talked about this before, but Mary is also extremely problematic in terms of blurring where the moral centre of Sherlock and John is. The thesis of the show has always been that Sherlock and John are damaged, problematic people, but ultimately good men. Ultimately, they’re on the side of the angels. Mary isn’t. Mary is on the side of the terrorists. She’s on the side of whoever will pay her the most to be on their side. In a way, that’s almost worse. Sherlock may “flirt” with Moriarty or Irene (though I always saw it as pretty one-sided on the latter) in the same way that he flirts with danger, with addiction, with obsessive behaviour, but he would never align himself with any of them. He may admire a clever plan, but his far greater fascination and draw is to the plain goodness of John Watson, extraordinary in its very ordinariness, yet it’s hardly ordinary, either. John can pull off making it look ordinary, but for someone who’s been through what he’s been through, it’s amazing that he IS still, ultimately, despite his own problematic behaviour, a good man. He and Sherlock both are, and it’s what they admire in each other, calling one another things like the best and the bravest and the kindest. That’s what they both seek, temporary fascinations with the devil they face every day in their line of work notwithstanding. Mary and Irene are both faces of this evil that Sherlock and John oppose. It’s the way things are: Sherlock and John are on the side of the angels. Mary and Irene work for the terrorists. Having Sherlock and John align themselves with Mary is incredibly problematic. 

I maintain that everything about Mary Morstan was a mistake. It was a mistake to bring her onto the show, a mistake to try to make her 1000% more interesting than she ever was in the original canon, and certainly a mistake to have had John go back to her, to have had him and Sherlock put themselves on her side, to have made themselves accomplices to her crimes by the very act of helping bury her past. It was a mistake to then not see her arc through the way it began, her irritating ghost appearances bearing no resemblance to her canonical behaviour, and her proprietary brokerage of Sherlock and John’s friendship completely out of place and undeserved. 

So yeah: in a response that’s probably 5,000 times longer than you were hoping for (apologies!), it takes a lot to make me admit that I hate another woman, even a purely fictional one. But Moffat and Gatiss succeeded on this one. I do hate Mary Morstan. I hate her because she’s an unrepentant murderer and liar, a narcissist whose only motivations are what she wants and feels would be good for her, and did everything in her power to tear Sherlock and John apart, and failing that, to outright kill Sherlock or manipulate him into killing himself. I see absolutely nothing admirable about this character and am just so glad she’s off the show. I wish she’d never been there in the first place. 

#sherlock #mary morstan #john watson #johnlock #rosefellova