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andaniellight · 4 months

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There are so much subtle implications of this encounter, and the way the story-telling is executed very neatly here still astounds me even on my second and third watch.

Frieren, the mage who helped and succeeded defeating the Demon King, emotionlessly explained to her unexperienced pupil about this demon, Elder Sage of Corruption, who invented Killing Magic so lethal that obliterated 40% adventurers and 70% of mages in the region. The demon was that bothersome that she had to put him on hold in temporary seal so they could continue their journey to kill The Demon King, because she nearly got defeated by it. Sounds worrisome, but then most human around that region typically don't live longer than a hundred years (the thought must be even more prodding now that her party had left her one by one from old age), and Frieren must've kept this in her mind, and it takes precisely no more than eighty years for the seal to become unstable; endangering so many lives once more.

We are the audience, but in this moment we are also Frieren's intrigued pupils. No one knows yet what's the plan, and it's Fern who learned the defensive spell first-hand while all we could do is watch. Ask: Frieren... what do you mean Fern is ready to face this demon? She's never fought a demon before, right? And this is the one demon who you considered so powerful. This is the demon who almost killed you and your friends back in the day...

And there's your answer. Back in the day, Qual the demon was dangerously powerful. Even in present day, eighty years later, Qual the demon is sharp enough to catch up with what's he missed. Qual figures out the complex defensive spell against Zoltraak that needed years for mages all across the land to create and perfected, from vague analysis, only in a minute. From that alone and countless experiences, Frieren knows better not to be cocky, even when she's told her (again) unexperienced pupil to protect her from Qual's relentless Zoltraak, because she knows the study and the result are going to work.

Only Frieren is sure of that, though. Lets Qual think he still has the chance to regain the upper hand. Doesn't care that Fern doesn't know either because, regardless of anything, fear will not compare to and withstand the experience at last, and Frieren wants Fern to feel proud of herself too when she defeats this demon who almost (almost) defeated her mentor once, a long time ago.

#Frieren #Sousou no Frieren #Frieren Beyond Journey's End #Fern #Fern The Mage #Frieren At The Funeral #it's 'the past can still catch up so fast to you in the future but you can still do something about it' at its finest #but it's not just about trust Frieren has for her pupil. it's also about how much of a lil shit she is putting us on edge lmao

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buglaur · 8 months

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The BOLD THE FACTS tag by @helenofsimblr

The Rules are simple! Tag people and name a character you want to know more about! If you want to let the person you tagged decide who to showcase, then don’t name a character and they can pick somebody. Easy! The person who is tagged will then bold the remarks below which apply to their character &, if they want to, include a picture with their reply!

thank you so muchh @rebouks @duusheen and @estah for tagging meee 💞💞 i'm gonna do it three times lol

Roxana MacMahon

[ PERSONAL]

$ Financial: wealthy (dad's money) / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable ✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other (college dropout) ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

[ FAMILY]

◒ Children: has 1 child (would be happy to have another in the future) / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent / not applicable

[ TRAITS + TENDENCIES]

♦ extroverted / introverted / in between ♦ disorganized / organized / in between ♦ close minded / open-minded / in between ♦ calm / anxious / in between ♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in between ♦ cautious / reckless / in between ♦ patient / impatient / in between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in between ♦ leader / follower / in between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in between ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in between ♦ traditional / modern / in between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown

[ BELIEFS]

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes (is cyberbullied by late grandpa) / no / don’t know / don’t care ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no

[ SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION ]

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable /naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

[ ABILITIES ]

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

[ HABITS ]

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / Alcoholic ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / Chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gambler

Virgil Burdick

[ PERSONAL]

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable ✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other (college dropout) ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

[ FAMILY]

◒ Children: has children / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent / not applicable

[ TRAITS + TENDENCIES]

[ BELIEFS]

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no

[ SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION ]

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / ??? (he doesn't know) ❥ Sex: sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable /naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

[ ABILITIES ]

[ HABITS ]

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / Alcoholic ☁ Smoking: tried it (wasn't a fan) / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / Chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gambler

Daithí Murray

[ PERSONAL]

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non applicable ✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified (has a business degree) / unqualified / studying / other (college dropout) ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

[ FAMILY]

◒ Children: has 1 child (doesn't want another) / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent / not applicable

[ TRAITS + TENDENCIES]

[ BELIEFS]

[ SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION ]

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual (realised this in his 30s) / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

[ ABILITIES ]

[ HABITS ]

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / Alcoholic ☁ Smoking: tried it / ""trying to quit"" / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / Chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes (never for himself though) / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gambler

sorry if i missed one i'm tired. thank you if you read all that <3<3 i haven't been around so idk who did this or who didn't so if you read all this i tag you!!! and you better do it 🫵

#christ almighty the HEAT these past couple days #i haven't been active because i'm afraid to turn my laptop on and have it melt through the bloody desk #can't play bg3 can't play sims (hence the old gameplay pics beneath the cut) :((( it's september for gods sake bring on the rain #i had to go into the city today and it was 25 degrees #i can't cope #sorry for complaining i'll be back to catch up soon <3 #also do you guys like what virgil is wearing?? i made it a while ago and i'm debating using it as my simblreen gift!!#you can't really see it here but i think its cute lol #posting this lying in bed its 1am goodnight simblr <£#<3

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 6 months

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honestly wally is stronger than atlas. if i had to constantly calibrate to the nature of my reality w/ full consciousness i would simply lose my fucking mind

#like babies dont Think while they learn how to exist #imagine straight up spawning fully aware and then everyone else is up to speed but youre standing there like #🧍‍♂️uh. hello. what is everything. what is this. huh????#LIKE???? i feel so bad for him. dude got dropped right into the middle of the ocean and was told 'learn to swim'#and hes trying. but he doesnt know what drowning is so he cant sink either #i mean i get it at least a little bit! its the Autism Experience but w/ him the dial is cranked up to a thousand #you dont know what you dont know but life goes on like you should. fuck #wally i am mentally beaming you a thousand apples grown in the shape of hearts #i believe in you dude you'll figure it out #well. im probably beaming apples into the past if the time discrepancy is real but yk yk #cause if it is then Current Wally probably has a solid handle on things. from a basic standpoint #in a wider lens i am led to believe that he is Scrabbling #is this speculation???#i think it counts.#wh speculation #homebogging #whenever i think about the tidbits we know - ex: wally learning about differences in size #internally i start howling. wally is just constantly dealing with things that would drive a person insane if they had to live it #how is he not Exhausted... it's all so much for someone who knows whats going on let alone someone scrambling to catch up #at least the other neighbors dont have to deal with memorizing physics and skills and behavior #and just Literally Everything That Comes With Being Alive #wally is a blank slate left to write itself.#ough. damn. fuck. i think i need to go stare into the woods for a bit...

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statementlou · 3 months

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why do you think the clock on the first merch is not quite at 2:00?

this is about how for the the three Australia shows, they have each had special one night only merch and the clock on the main design has been set at 3:00, 6:00 and 9:00 (369!!) but the 3:00 one is actually at 2:58 (I'm assuming this is a typo and anon meant not quite at 3)

I mean... possibly no good reason but on vibes only it makes me think "369 coming soon" or like, almost there, almost time for 369... does that make any sense??? I mean I absolutely would not be surprised if LT3 was just called 369 and it would be like Louis to tease that... (although to be clear I don't think we're getting LT3 before November, this would be "soon" in the cosmic and Louis sense)

#I realize this doesn't entirely make sense if you look at it too close but it just FEELS RIGHT to me #based on past evidence Louis doesn't love coming up with titles for things and does love using familiar catch phrase type things #and things the fans have already latched on to... so like- it's gonna be 369 yk?#anyway #banking this to pull out and either gloat or make fun of myself in a year's time ->#lt3 prediction #why not #sbb

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inhuman-obey-me · 6 months

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Hello I just wanted to say that you guys' blog is literally my favorite Obey Me blog out there. The content you put out scratches my brain just right. It makes me so so happy to see a darker take on these characters without ruining what makes them appealing in the first place / straight up making them just be... Well, bad in an unsavory way LMAO

Plus as someone who's obsessed with the worldbuilding and lore, and with demonology as well- its quite rare to see those aspects be discussed more in depth in this fandom so scrolling through this blog is so refreshing. I find myself coming back so often even if it is to look at something I've already read countless times before.

That's it! Just wanted to give you guys some well-earned compliments. Keep up the great work and I hope both of you have a great day!!

asldjflajsdl;fajdsf

We are replying to this like two months late but this made us grin the moment it came in and just made us happy to see in our inbox -- thank you SO MUCH for the kind words!!!!!!! ;/////; Absolute honor to be called anyone's favorite OM blog <3

And yes!! All the OM characters have complexities to them, and it's fun to further explore facets of them that are usually only briefly touched upon in-game. They are a cast of powerful, ethereal beings after all.

Honestly it makes us so happy that people do really enjoy our demonology-influenced takes on the game, and we've actually been pleasantly surprised by how much the devs have done their research on things. Extrapolating things from the game for fun worldbuilding and lore is also so fun for us so we're happy others enjoy our takes!!

Thank you again so much for sending this in -- we should be getting back to things soon so we hope you continue to enjoy our blog!!! 💕

#ask and ye shall be answered #thanks for being so nice to us 🥺#seriously this was so nice thank you!!#obey me #the past couple months have been crazy both personally and......*gestures to world*#and we fell behind on the lessons but we're catching up!!

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moeblob · 3 months

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I kinda maybe put a lot of my OC plot tag lines on a Wheel and gave it a spin so outta 79 options, it landed on "Cellphone Justice" which is... these two.

Matthew "Skittles" Mouse and Daisy Eddington

Partners in justice (of sorts). They're basically vigilantes and their orders are simply text messages. They don't really know who their bosses are but they do as they are told.

Skittles is a very mediocre guy. Doesn't stand out. The most color he has in his wardrobe is blue jeans. He's amazingly asexual and has zero interest in romance regardless of intimacy and yet he gets partnered with Daisy. The gayest lady he has ever met. Great start. She enjoys calling him fun little nicknames but seeing as they're monitored closely (via cell phones/technology) she is scolded and told to pick a single one. So she does. She dubs him Skittles. The candy as gay as her.

The one thing they have in common is their number one weakness: cute girls.

Daisy turns into a stuttering MESS of a human being. A disaster. At the mere sight of a cute girl. Skittles on the other hand is TERRIFIED of them. When asked, he simply blames his life growing up. Daisy doesn't really push the matter just thinks it's a little weird to be scared of every single cute girl (no offense to the not being afraid of her taken).

#my characters #like the entire thing with skittles is just he is SO boring looking and hes so scared of cute girls #and daisy thinks its REALLY FUNNY dude why are you scared of them haha girls are GREAT #and then she meets his younger sister and is like oh dang dude she is ADORABLE and she sees him practically shaking and sweating #surely its not THAT bad but ah no wait #two days pass and daisy is like oh my god shes horrifying ????? what the hell?#and growing up with her and trying to be a good big brother is all fine and dandy until the cute lil sister gets him hurt a lot #like hospital injuries from either protecting her or just .... somehow wrong place with her at the wrong times all the time #so he gets a fear of cute girls bc his lil sister is a cute monster who is the reason most of his limbs have been broken in the past #like broken leg ? that was from amelia and a stair case #the broken arm ? trying to help amelia get something out of a tree #the broken wrist ? catching amelia falling out of a tree #the other broken leg ? amelia -#the list goes on and on and he also got into multiple fights trying to keep her safe from guys #bc she really is just a cute lil innocent looking girl but shes a schemer and it does come back to bite her #except for she has a good big bro who took the repercussions when he could #daisy just watching her partner pale and shake and sweat when hes in the same room as his sister and daisy feels so bad for him #like hes really going through it even after all these years #but meeting amelia puts a lot into perspective for when daisy and skittles are out and about #cause hes very efficient and chill talking to dudes and to mature looking women #then he turns into a bundle of nerves at wide eyed innocence and daisy is like yeah ok i gotta #i gotta be a lil less gay for his sake only if hes around cause i cant make him talk to his biggest fear thats mean #shes still really gay but yeah it works out and she looks out for him and in turn he looks out for her and its great!#they become friends! yeehaw!#lil trivia is she was a drama kid in hs and he was on the baseball team but never really played or put effort into it #she was a straight a student and he very consciously maintained a c average through calculating grades and missing stuff on tests on purpos #anyway thank u if you read all the tags or even ty if you read just hte post itself #im sorry for ocing on main when its my own ocs #ill be back tomorrow with .... idk what

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cinammonelles · 11 months

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Thoughts about Nea, past!Allen and the next chapter

long post, spoilers under the cut

Okay so I've always wondered why Nea gave up on Allen as his ally so quickly. Allen was one of his closest allies besides Cross and Tim till the time of his death right? He even gave up his body so Nea could execute his masterplan.

Yes, Allen did lose all his memories(or did he?) and somehow ended up in the Black Order. But we know Nea can show him his memories so he should also technically be able to show him past!Allen memories that were locked away? Or atleast memories of himself with past!Allen?

Allen would definitely be torn and overwhelmed and confused after but everyone who has known the "other side of the war" has taken Nea's side so far. And Allen even went so far as to become Nea's vessel in the past. He would definitely take his old friend's side again right? Or even seek out some sort of a middle ground?

Why didn't he do that then? Nea watched all of his memories since Cross started tailing him and Mana. Wouldn't it be easier to have Allen half-cooperate during the little time he has left, instead of having him actively work against him?

There's so much emotion in this one panel here. Confusion, worry, pain, anger, desolation, and maybe even a hint of guilt?

Its like... he just didn't wanna disturb the little equilibrium Allen had managed to create in his life? The little community he had found in the Black Order?

I mean if we think abt it Nea never really wanted to parasitize Allen in the first place(or atleast that's what I think the evidence so far implies). It was just the only option available to them back then. They needed Nea's powers to thwart the Earl & the Noahs' plans. And if Nea died then the Earl would just absorb(?) him and there would be no stopping him after that.

And I think giving up on Allen as an ally was Nea's way of being kind to him. Of returning the favour. Being his ally isn't an easy or pleasant job from what we've seen so far. And Allen would've disappeared anyway from the moment past!Allen transferred Nea's memories to himself. After seeing his attachment to the Order and the friends he made there, maybe he just wanted Allen to disappear with pleasant memories he made at the Order rather than the gruesome memories of being Nea's ally.

This panel in particular is so sad. He was able to give up on Allen as an ally so easily because he still had Tim. Tim was his last remaining ally and then he wasn't. And its particularly cruel how Hoshino pulled this off. He says that he doesn't need anyone else as long as he has Tim and just a few chapters later Apocryphos kills him. Nea must be used to losing allies by now but Tim really was the last real friend he had left(hoshino you cruel cruel woman)

Also the way Link's just bomb dropped the news abt tim?

Imagine hearing your last friend/ally died from some rando and then not even getting the time to process it because your arch enemy's ressurection shows up and somehow has your face? And then you get yeeted back into brain breakroom just as you were about to start beefing with him and the next time you wake up you're in your childhood home which you have mixed, complicated feelings for.

And that's not even getting into the whole 'tim chose allen over nea' thing.

Also if Allen goes back to the mansion and finds Bookman, he's guaranteed to find out atleast part of his past if not the whole. And he would definitely demand to know more from Nea. Will he accept Allen as his ally again now that Tim is gone? Will he accept Link as well? Will he try to kill Johnny again? Will he even be stable enough to consider future plans? Will we ever see Lavi again? We find out next month :D

Or we don't

(I also have a theory abt the Bookmen having the ability to transfer memories but that one's for another time)

Thanks for reading!!!

#day 3615 of me being absolutely normal abt nea #everyone say f in the chat for nea #boyyo just can't catch a break #this kinda ended up rantier than i'd like but oh well #i understand that this is very hc-heavy so if you don't agree feel free to scroll past :D #nea d. campbell #nea d campbell #allen walker #past!allen #dgm #dgm spoilers #d gray man #d gray man manga #text #🍀#when will lavi return from war

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carefulfears · 8 months

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the biggest thing about elegy is that it takes all of that unspoken isolation of this arc, and it slowly lets the audience in. the first thing that mulder says about the apparitions, is that they seem to be an "omen." an impending prophecy. and carefully, throughout the episode, both the audience and scully are waiting to see, not who the killer is, but what is being foretold. when they're going over records, and scully's nose starts bleeding, it's the one thing that they can't ignore. she wasn't even there in the previous episode. she was in the hospital. alone. they don't talk about it. she's "fine." she has "always been the strong one." just like in irresistible, years earlier, she does not want him to know how much she is struggling. but she doesn't have any control. it is dripping out of her. the sound of his voice when he says "oh, scully." and how quickly she responds "it's okay. i'm fine."

it's that kind of childlike grimace in him, the same man who flinches away from dead bodies and stares at the ground before his father. and she's so fast to try to restore order. it's okay. i'm fine. don't worry, i'll clean it up. i'll make it go away. when she disappears into the bathroom and sees an apparition there herself...i think she decides to go to the hospital because she just needs space, honestly. she's scared. he offers to drive her, to go with her, twice. asks, "you sure?" and she says, twice, "i'm fine."

elegy builds to two separate climaxes: the first, when mulder comes to scully's apartment. but before that, we see scully in karen kosseff's office, the same therapist that she had gone to in irresistible, and presumably has kept a relationship with in the years since. she tells karen that she's been diagnosed with inoperable untreatable cancer, and when karen asks, "you've kept working?" she answers, "yes. it's been important to me."

she's taken aback when karen asks why, is surprised at the question, and tells her "agent mulder has been concerned. he's been supportive, through this time."

KOSSEFF: Do you feel that you owe it to him to continue working?

SCULLY: (quickly) No. (pauses) I guess I never realized how much I rely on him before this...his passion...he's been a great source of strength that I've drawn on.

KOSSEFF: What happened last night, Dana?

SCULLY: I saw something. I, I don't know what to trust. If I saw it because of the stress, because the image had been suggested to me or if it was a suggestion of my own fears.

KOSSEFF: Your fear of failing him?

SCULLY: (exhales emotionally) Maybe.

this is such a rare admission from scully. first of all, she's being confronted. this is not normal. it is not normal to work to your death. it's like bill tells her, a couple of episodes later, "what are you doing at work, getting knocked down, beaten up? what are you trying to prove?"

(she hadn't even told bill about her cancer. she'd been sick for months. she thought she was going to die in memento mori, she knows she's going to die sooner than later. and she instructed her mom not to tell her brother. from the moment that mulder said "i refuse to believe that," it really was only going to go one way.)

she's being confronted. why are you working? (for mulder). do you feel you owe him? (no, i need him).

she's really alone. she's sick. like, she's really sick. she spent the last case in the hospital. she's having a hard time keeping up. she's thinning, and bleeding, and struggling. but there she goes, every day, at every hour. monster chasing. telling him she's fine.

(so much conflict comes from the way that mulder's ignorance perfectly enables scully's repression)

when he shows up, late, at her apartment, he comes in a mile-a-minute, about how he needs her "help" on the case, before asking her what her doctor said. (her answer, of course, being, "i'm fine.")

he tells her that everyone who has seen an apparition, was dying. every person who reported a premonition, was near death themselves.

SCULLY: Harold Spuller is dying too?

MULDER: Well, that's what I need your medical opinion on.

SCULLY: Well, what if he isn't?

MULDER: I would be very surprised. What is a death omen if not a vision of our own mortality? And who among us would most likely be able to see the dead?

this is one of the most hauntingly isolating moments of the series...he has just told her that she is going to die. and he doesn't know, that that's what he said. she is forced to process it, completely by herself. and she doesn't believe in ghosts, or "premonitions," but she knows that he is right. (when is he not?)

("maybe harold is sicker than we thought he was.")

the second moment that this episode builds to, is the final confrontation between mulder and scully. after the murder is solved. after harold dies.

SCULLY: I saw something, Mulder.

MULDER: What?

SCULLY: The fourth victim. I saw her in the bathroom before you came to tell me.

MULDER: Why didn't you tell me?

SCULLY: Because I didn't want to believe it. Because I don't want to believe it.

MULDER: Is that why you came down here, to prove that it wasn't true?

SCULLY: No, I came down here because you asked me to.

MULDER: Why can't you be honest with me?

SCULLY: (defensively) What do you want me to say? That you're right, that, that I believe it even if I don't? I mean, is that what you want?

MULDER: Is that what you think I want to hear?

SCULLY: (softly) No.

they come really...close here? to talking about it? she almost baits him several times this season. she spends so much of this arc thinking...maybe, this will be it. maybe if she fucks off on assignment, gets a tattoo with another man, he'll say it. maybe if she calls him out for never celebrating her birthday, he'll acknowledge why this is the year he did. maybe if they spend a friday night with a bottle of wine, they'll talk. maybe if she tells him, those things you believe are death omens? i saw it. he'll know.

i can't remember which one of you said that all of their arguments are just how to love each other. she doesn't want to believe. but she's there, because he has asked her to be. even in all of their repressed denial, there is no escaping what's happening. it hangs over both of them.

i love the moments in this arc where she just snaps. in this scene when she says, what do you want from me? do you want me to just believe you? and her quiet resignation, when he makes her answer her own question. no. she knows that's not what he wants.

MULDER: (his voice softens) I know what you're afraid of. I'm afraid of the same thing.

SCULLY: The doctor said I was fine.

MULDER: I hope that's the truth.

SCULLY: (whispers) I'm going home.

"i know what you're afraid of. i'm afraid of the same thing."

except, no, he doesn't. and no, they are not.

but she knows what he's afraid of, just as her therapist had known what she's afraid of ("your fear of failing him?") and so she dodges his admittance with reassurance. she's fine.

that last scene, when she goes out and cries in her car, and she sees harold's ghost in the backseat. she is so alone. she's working on her deathbed. they don't talk about it. she's afraid, and she's not fine, and she is going to "fail" him because she cannot keep herself alive for him, and she can't avoid it. it's in the backseat. it's in the bathroom mirror. it's bleeding out of her.

#here trish #txf.txt #elegy #DANA LOOK OUT!!! YOUR ELEGIES ARE EULOGIZING YOU!!!!!!!!!!#i was saying last night how much i love ‘gethsemane’ as an episode title #and i think that may be my favorite one #but i love ‘elegy’ a lot too #‘a lament for the dead’#this whole episode is sorrow for the dead and dying #how we cannot catch up to them #and our dying girl at the center. seeing the omens. knowing what’s coming. crying alone in her car.#this show was always so so so resonant and impactful when it came to themes of grief and loss #anyway. there is no beyond the sea etc etc #also i noticed last night that scully mentions how long they've been together a lot during this arc #'in the four years i've known you' in tempus fugit #'i would think after four years' in elegy #'everything that we've done over the past four years' in reduxii #she's taking stock

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