One of my least favorite things about USAmerica, as a lifelong resident, is the fact that in a lot of areas (especially predominantly White areas), you'll see someone just chilling outside in public and your gut reaction is "they're acting weird." Like they're just standing there and you're like, "suspicious".
In order for someone vibing somewhere to not be suspicious, they have to be in a designated Vibing Area (like a park), AND have a visible reason for being there - a kid, or a picnic blanket or whatever. Maybe a book or sketchbook. Then chilling goes from a threat to an enviable luxury.
I think this comes from a combination of factors, including the loss of third spaces, the people-unfriendly design of our cities, and the incessant anti-homeless propaganda. The Outside is largely not a place where people would want to chill if they had a home to chill in instead, since everywhere you go is dirty and loud, smells like cars, is dangerous from cars, and doesn't have anywhere to sit down. So therefore it follows that people who chill outside are probably Homeless and therefore Scary.
I hate it. Chilling outside is one of life's most amazing free pleasures. People should be able to do it without suspicion! There should be spaces for doing it and a culture around chilling outside as the norm! Also, the fear of homeless people is really deeply effed up!!
Imo the loss of third spaces is suffocating us, mental health wise, especially those of us who don't have private land to chill on. But I think one of the obstacles to reintroducing third spaces back into cities is the idea that "Weird (read: homeless) People Will Go There". Which, like, yeah. Unhoused people have to exist somewhere. There's a reluctance to let unhoused people chill anywhere, or to be anywhere near them, and the people in power in the USA are willing to shoot themselves in the foot in order to guarantee that the separation and cruelty remain. (After all, the people in power in the USA have private land to chill on.)
I think your average white USAmerican has just consumed so much anti-homeless and bootstraps and NIMBY propaganda that they don't realize the problem that lack of third spaces presents to EVERYONE in their community.
I'm rambling at this point. Basically lately I've been going to my apartment complex' playground and sitting in the sun on the cinderblock wall that surrounds it, and I feel so bizarre and out of place. I feel like I'm freaking people out (and I'm low-key worried someone is going to report me for hanging out by a playground while being visibly queer. Which they probably won't but still)
All I want to say is.
Bring back third spaces now
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I usually don't care that we get those giant ULINE catalogs because it wastes the money of a shitty family to print and ship them. However, I did not consider the weight of those bricks in the bag of our postal carrier. I think I'll call to cancel because we get two shipping to our house. I'll save the postal carriers back a little bit.
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bpp idk what i was thinking but i think i just stumbled on a network of pjm blogs on tumblr and i'm so horrified i don't know what to do with myself. it scares me that people so hateful they remind me of profiles on true crime shows are obsessing over the members in the same place as me, just moving anonymously in the fandom among people who are normal fans. their blogs are supposed to be focused on jm but all they do is dissect other members and abuse them,,,,,,
the way they talk about all the members esp suga, tae and jk wishing that they die in the most horrific ways, obsessing over tae and jk's bodies in their magazine shoots and tearing them apart in such dehumanizing ways, fantasizing about hybe going bankrupt and jm leaving bts while in the next paragraph attacking jm for still staying in bts. they keep repeating to themselves that they're the 'true' people who love jm and everybody else hates him. it's so wild to me bpp!!! the members hate him, the company hates him, korean public hates him, his fandom hates him, his friends hate him, but they are the only ones toiling day and night out of love for him. i saw 26 blogs like this with many engagements and it depressed me a lot. i bias jm but could never stand for people hating the members like that. and it's real hate bpp, not just silly stuff people say when they're angry. how will our fandom survive when people can turn a blind eye to this kind of hatred? i'm not on twitter but i know it's more toxic, are solos this extreme there? i'm so depressed after seeing all that i want to leave the fandom completely. there's too much hatred here. people are too insane and there's no way anyone who sees all that hate won't be affected. you talk a lot about the fandom imploding but do you see a way out? do you see the fandom getting better? how can we fix this? i want jm to comeback to a real army fandom in 2025 not a collection of pjms surrounded by other solo stans all fighting each other and hoping that the group jm loves ceases to exist. sorry sorry so sorry that i'm ranting but i feel so scared and heartbroken. the hate jm gets from other member's solos is already so bad but he's getting it from pjms too and they're just as bad hating on other members. how can we fix the fandom to become filled with supporters again bpp? can we even fix the fandom to remove solo stans? have you seen any precedent of this done successfully?
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Anon, I've written about how solo stans think and behave before, as well as wider fandom dynamics in Chapter 2. You can search my blog for any of those keywords and find posts where I've addressed a lot of this.
That said, the answer to nearly all the questions you asked here, is no. Because people are people. That sentence sounds cliché, glib, almost meaningless at first read, but please consider what that sentence means more carefully, whatever you determine that to mean, accept it, and move on with your life doing what you can to support the artists you love.
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Talked with my boss today about maybe taking a month during summer to go vanlifeing and working remotely
She seemed totally okay with it, so I'm slowly getting my hopes up (and looking for a good van)
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Hmm. Thinking about if t rexes were scavengers like that Jack Horner guy thought, were. Like lions??? (Interestingly in one of the books I think The Lost World, Ellie Sattler mentions how hyenas hunt and lions sometimes tend to scavenge the hyenas' kills)
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I think calling the cops on people is always morally wrong and unnacceptable except when it’s my grandma from California calling the cops on her rich neighbors who are breaking water conservation mandates and lighting off illegal fireworks
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South Park “Freemium Isn’t Free” – Review – The Insider
The writers even arranged various other explanations as to how the scam works with various whiteboards: “Make highest $ Seem Like Best Deal”—“Game Must Be Playable in 2 Minutes”—“Simple Gameplay. Able To Play On The Toilet.” Unfortunately, these can only be seen when paused, as they disappear in a quick second and are hard to read, in itself a nod to how sneaky the creators behind mobile game apps can be. “Freemium – The “Mium” is Latin for “not really.” The Minister explains the RPG Loop to freemium gaming: “Explore, Collect, Spend, Improve.” In another scene, a blocked message on the whiteboard behind the Minister’s head reads: “Push Notifications (Keep Them Random).” And in the final scene where Satan fights the Canadian Devil, one whiteboard reads, “Use fake campaign to feign concern i.e. ‘Drink Responsibly,’” and the left one shows an 8-step chart on manipulating emotional pain so they can feel temporary relief by numbing the pain.
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Comedy Central is airing this episode again and I just realized that in 2014 when it first aired I was beginning my neuropsychology studies as a freshly diagnosed* adult autistic. No wonder.
(*Not in a 'professional' sort of way. The activist who coined neurodivergence and neurodiversity, Neurodivergent K., chatted with me on Facebook and told me I definitely pinged autistic and to talk to my neurologist who at this point was a friend and K knew that. K was one of the foremost activists since the 90s. My neurologist conferred with the general physician I had known for over a decade, and here I am.)
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