#oliver darkshire

[rainonsand]

Another day, another delightful Neil Gaiman story.

----------------

EDIT: Where are my manners. The book in question is Once Upon A Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller

linktr.ee/oliverdarkshire

#neil gaiman #Oliver Darkshire #Once Upon A Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller #p

[unrighteousbooks]

Be Warned: An Impostor is Among Us

I recently finished reading Oliver Darkshire's book Once Upon a Tome. Mr. Darkshire is an antiquarian bookseller at Sotheran's Rare Books in London. While I greatly enjoyed the book, I was deeply disturbed to read this passage:

"Of all the nice letters I've ever received, the ones I hold particularly close to my heart were sent from a mysterious stranger masquerading as the bookshop-owning angel Aziraphale from the novel Good Omens."

I do not understand why Mr. Darkshire describes me as being "from the novel Good Omens," as though I were some sort of fictional character. Setting that aside, however, it is unnerving to realize that a complete stranger is wandering the streets of London, writing letters and pretending to be me.

I can offer no proof, but I believe that the likely suspects can be narrowed down to a very short list.

A few years ago -- well, I suppose it was actually many years ago -- there was a book called History of New York. It was subsequently revealed that the author of this book, one Diedrich Knickerbocker, did not in fact exist. Perhaps "Mr. Knickerbocker" has moved on from creating fictional personas, and is now hijacking the identity of legitimate booksellers such as myself. (Regular readers will recall that I have previously commented on Mr. Knickerbocker: https://www.aziraphale.com/post/143753123162/a-curious-bit-of-satire-in-an-unvisited-corner-of)

Meanwhile, I have also been informed that there is a man named Buster Poindexter who is notorious for falsifying his identity. I have it on good authority that Mr. Poindexter has openly confessed that he is suffering from a personality crisis. It should also be noted that the name "poindexter" is often used to refer to someone who is enamored of books. Coincidence? I think not.

Another likely suspect -- or possibly "suspects," plural -- is a person or persons going by the name Pratchett Gaiman, or possibly Gaiman Pratchett. Again, I have no proof, but I have lost count of the times someone in the shop has asked me about so-and-so Gaiman or such-and-such Pratchett.

Finally, I cannot completely discount the possibility that my friend Crowley might be playing some sort of elaborate prank. He insists that this is not his doing, but it is just the sort of device that he would employ to rile me. He knows that pranks are anathema to me.

#aziraphale #aziraphale's books #sotheran's #oliver darkshire #gaiman #pratchett #crowley #imposters #bookstores #antiquarian books #diedrich knickerbocker #buster pointdexter #anathema

[weird-little-book-lover]

Best Neil Gaiman quote ever

#neil gaiman #oliver darkshire #neil gaiman quotes #good omens #ineffable husbands

[liyazaki]

Once Upon A Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller by Oliver Darkshire

#babe wake up- new favorite book dedication just dropped #additionally dear sir you have THE most badass last name to ever last name #lgbtq+ #lgbtq #lgbtq authors #oliver darkshire #once upon a tome

[victusinveritas]

#oliver darkshire #people #antiquarian #things

[phantom-at-the-library]

#oliver darkshire #neil gaiman #its funny #authors

[chronivore]

Halfling-centric RPG by Oliver Darkshire

#rpg #ttrpg #Halfling #hobbit #oliver Darkshire

[dilettantealchemiter]

inspired by the works of Oliver Darkshire (https://linktr.ee/oliverdarkshire) 

#elon musk #elon twitter #rpg #solo play #oliver darkshire #rip twitter #riptwitter #@twitter

[anotherfanaccount]

The problem, in a nutshell, is that collecting books is much more than a hobby. The sheer amount of space required to house most book collections means that whoever shares your living area needs to be very understanding, or more ideally a co-conspirator, because the rest of their lives will be spent making room for your incredibly invasive pastime, until one day they trip on a folio and plummet to their doom down a staircase.

The only real solution, I have begun to advise, is that your average book collector choose to live as a hermit. This is a foolproof way of avoiding judgement. Alas, in many ways the life of a book collector is doomed to the distraction of romance, if only because the zeitgeist is infected with the idea that a bookshop is a great place to romantically approach strangers, a plague for which romantic comedies have a great deal to answer.

Oliver Darkshire

Once upon a Tome

#book #book quotes #once upon a tome #oliver Darkshire

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (11-17 Jun 2023)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

🥰 Grounds For Divorce (Tepre) - 122K, drarry, accidental soulbound - the years of them dealing/not dealing with the Bond, the angst, Harry being a mess & figuring shit out, a trip to Egypt, family, lemon trees, a cat and a garden

😊👂‍ Murder at the Beauty Pageant (Miss Underhay Mystery #12) (Helena Dixon, author; Karen Cass, narrator) - Kitty & Matt solve a beauty pageant murder while hampered by a new, obstreperous Inspector

😊 Once Upon a Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller (Oliver Darkshire) - charming, amusing & affectionate account of Oliver's journey in becoming a rare bookseller. (Oliver runs Sotheran's twitter account & if you know, you know.) [when I put the hold on this at my library there was no audiobook available but upon returning it, i see that one is there now, and i'm salty bc honestly this was the perfect book for an audiobook!]

💖💖 +74K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

A Place of Healing (this_wayward_life) - MCU: stucky, 12K - very cute & fluffy modern no-powers AU with nurse!bucky and doped-to-the-gills recovering steve who falls head-over-heels at first sight

Memories are Made of This (eleveninches) - MCU: stucky, 13K - recovering bucky angst-with-a-HEA

Long Time Coming (BewareTheIdes15) - Smallville: Clark/Lex, 14K - not my usual playground but I've enough osmosis cultural knowledge to enjoy this excellent fic; the characterizations were great - Lex's POV was absolutely hilarious, he was really going thru it

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Hot Ones - Jason Sudeikis

Why city flags may be the worst-designed thing you've never noticed | Roman Mars

Food for the Gods | 1909 Recipe

Songs That Changed Music: Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick

Game Changer - s5, e7-8 "The Bachelor"

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

Switched on Pop - Listening 2 Daft Punk: Random Access Memories

⭐Smart Podcast, Trashy Books - 566. The Blessings of Comfort Reads with KJ Charles

Desert Island Discs - Simon Pegg, actor

Our Opinions Are Correct - Mini Episode: Which Star Trek Character Deserves Their Own Show?

Rachel Maddow Presents: Déjà News - Episode 1: Riot at the Gates (Again)

Radiolab - The Seagulls

⭐Into It - How Netflix Envy Broke TV

⭐The Sporkful - Inside The World Of Food Smuggling

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - The Greenbrier

Shedunnit - Miss Marple, Spinster Sleuth

⭐Vibe Check - I’m Not Gonna Smile for You, but I Might Twerk

Ologies with Alie Ward - Pectinidology (SCALLOPS) with Samantha Lynch

Outward Plus - Lesbian Bars: A Love Story

The Waves Plus - Your Period Deserves Respect

You Are Good - Men in Black w. Stef Rubino

Our Opinions Are Correct - A Sense of Place with Jessica Johns

Into It - 'The Flash,' 'The Idol,' and 'The Ultimatum': Watch, Hate-Watch, or Skip?

Dear Prudence Plus - I Tested My Partner’s Parenting Readiness and He’s Upset. Help!

Pop Culture Happy Hour - The Flash and What's Making us Happy

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - World Famous Crochet Museum

Radiolab - Beware the Sand Striker

Endless Thread - Treasure in the Woods

Welcome to Night Vale #230 - Carlos, Explained

99% Invisible #540 - The Siren of Scrap Metal

Re: Dracula - June 17: Die Away in the Distance

ICYMI Plus - Was the MirandaSings Controversy Inevitable?

Outward Plus - Pride Special: Why the Law Cares About Your Sex

Switched on Pop - Chartbreakers: Mexican regional y más

⭐Hit Parade Plus - Yes We Can Can Edition

Wait Wait… Don't Tell Me! - James Marsden

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

Juice Newton radio

The Essential John Denver

The Complete Albums 2000-2009

Pop Radio • Workout

Kylie Minogue's entire 14 album, 32 yr discography in order + 3 special compliation albums

Pop Radio • Pump-up

Trip Hop Instrumentals

The Pointer Sisters

#sunday reading recap #bookgeekgrrl's reading habits #bookgeekgrrl's soundtracks #miss underhay mystery series #oliver darkshire #fanfic ftw #hot ones #ted talks #b dylan hollis #game changer show #kylie minogue #the pointer sisters #juice newton #john denver #into it podcast #smart podcast trashy books #hit parade podcast #vibe check podcast #the sporkful podcast #re: dracula #99% invisible podcast #welcome to night vale #desert island discs #switched on pop podcast #the atlas obscura podcast #shedunnit podcast #endless thread podcast #rachel maddow presents: déjà news #wait wait...don't tell me! #ologies podcast

[slipperyliz]

thank you to whoever recommended Once Upon A Tome by Oliver Darkshire, the book about the rare bookshop, bc I just finished it and it's great. funny in my favorite way, full of characters, excellent use of footnotes, and it mentions my favorite bookseller. an excerpt:

I have cultivated at least one nemesis who routinely complains about my antics to the Booksellers Association, who rather distractedly notify us both every time that schoolyard spats don't really come under their purview. In many ways, this bookseller is one of my oldest and dearest correspondents, though I suspect he shall never know it.**

**If you're out there, and reading this, then I want you to know that you have no sense of humour and your complaint letters are the nectar of life to me.

#oliver darkshire #once upon a tome

[hedonistbyheart]

Oliver is at it again!

#sotherans #oliver darkshire #i see you #he's courting Entities i swear

[unrighteousbooks]

There is no way to stop the passage of time, and there is no way to prevent a book eventually going the way of all flesh. If you lock it away, and no one ever spends any time appreciating it, it's still going to turn to dust like the rest of us. We do what we do at the bookshop to make sure it survives until it gets to its next owner. All anyone can do is take reasonable precautions. Keep the books away from fire. Don't throw them in a puddle. And remember to take delight in them.

Oliver Darkshire, The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller

#oliver darkshire #misadventures of a rare bookseller #books #antiquarian books #old books #quotes about books #wise words

[crazyfandomcatlady]

What does the phrase "a litany of sins" mean. The sentence is, "the book had not only borne witness to a litany of sins"

The books is Once Upon a Tome by Oliver Darkshire

#literature #words #english #books and reading #books #oliver darkshire #once upon a tome #english teacher #teachers

[radedneko]

As a bookseller, you grow used to encountering cursed tomes every now and then. The regrettable part is that no one you inform about this will hold your claim credible, and it's very difficult to explain to your Accounts department, or the board of directors in their annual review, that a certain portion of the stock isn't really saleable because it keeps killing the customers who try to buy it.

~Once Upon a Tome: The Misadventures of a Rare Bookseller by Oliver Darkshire

#quotes kelly likes #once upon a tome #oliver darkshire

[whatifbutnot]

Undated diary entry, Villa Diotari, Switzerland

I am at my last, I can do no more. We must leave, weather or not. My only hope is that there remains a sanatorium in Europe which news of us has not reached, that we might be taken in. Not only are my nerves most hotly strained, but the infamy of this place has grown to a degree which must surely end any hopes of returning to polite society. We will be forever pariahs, the subject of knowing looks and outrageous gossip. I truly believe we will never be able to return to our lives. Once the immediate scandal has died down, we must assume new identities in a place where we will not be discovered by our old acquaintances, maybe Patagonia, or the Dutch trading colonies.

The final extremity was the appearance of Augusta Mary, Byron's older half-sister. I had known her, lightly, during my earlier acquaintance with Byron, and recall finding her somewhat over-awing in her worldliness. It seems she had a corresponding sense of me, as something of an ingénue. While time has changed my feelings - if nothing else Byron's correspondence has rendered me knowledgable in the ways of the world - it appears she still sees me in the manner of a nut to be cracked from its husk and gravely masticated.

It started with her very greeting, which was much more physical than the moment called for. She took the opportunity to whisper a remembrance into my ear which was not in any way appropriate for one of my now married status. There followed a series of implications which betrayed her lineage, being the sort of suggestions that only a Byron would make. I warm even thinking of them. Thank God that Sophia truly is an ingénue, in her condition she could ill bear the anger that full understanding would have granted her.

No word would discourage her. If anything, resistance made her more outrageous in her behaviour, progressing from mere speech to physicality, the caressing of a hand, the touching of a knee. And then, during dinner, the placement of her stockinged foot in a place where only a wife's foot should be placed.

This cannot go on. Though I know I am strong enough to resist her brave physicality with its threat of robust and degenerate carnality, I fear that her determined assault may give me no choice in the matter. Even as I sit here writing this, Augusta Maria may be slowly removing her stockings, the concentration needed necessary leading her to bite her lower lip, in preparation of a further assault on my dignity. Even thinking about this makes my manhood warm with anger. No, no, I cannot place myself in a position where I might be unable to resist, perhaps tied down, being disciplined for my resistance, maybe being roughly penetrated in a way that only a wife should roughly penetrate a man. One's dignity and reputation could not bear it.

Tomorrow we will leave. Tonight, when Sophia has taken the draught I have made her and is securely asleep, I shall go to Augusta Maria to tell her of my escape and the failure of her plans.

I fear my masterpiece will not be completed. I shall leave it here with the memories of this place. On balance, I do not think I shall be too sorry to end the enterprise, I do not think the world is yet ready for the sort of work I was creating. It is too adventurous, pushes too many boundaries. I will leave Theodoric where he stands, having killed the villain but turning to find the body it not where he had slain it.

#and so it ends #not with a bang #but with a whimper #and vice versa #it's a shame #I really wanted to write that work of genius #maybe the work of genius is the friends we made along the way #that bear for instance #trapped in a cabin with lord byron #oliver darkshire #writing project #rpg