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#not all of these are up to my standard but too fucking bad
samkerrworshipper · 6 hours
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las 15.
mapi leon x reader, alexia putellas x reader (platonic)
warnings: the spanish federation ick
erm look at me posting something 😮 anyways enjoy haha i kinda hate it but need to feed yall somehow
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“You need to be aware of the consequences of what could happen if you sign this document.”
You stared down at the mahogany surface of your lawyers desk, it was dark, sanded, smooth and shiny. Contemporary, but it also looked old, like a heirloom. It distracted your from the non stop drawl.
“I don’t care, I’m signing it.”
Your eyes travelled along the surface, lookinbg at the different waves of wood and the way that the dark colours marbled together.
“The RFEF could come for you, they could try and take your license. You might not compete at the world cup, the press will come for you, Vilda will come for you, Barca could reduce your playing time, it could be the end of your career. There are other negatives.”
You’ve thought about all of them of course, how could you not?
“I’ve already said it, I don’t care. Let them come for me, let them do whatever they want. I am done with it all. Fourteen other players have signed it, no? I will be the fifteenth and that is final.”
You weren’t a big fan of your lawyer, he was old and money oriented. He also didn’t have your best interest in mind, his sole focus was earning you as much money as possible, which had been fine up until today.
“So what? You plan to be the best in the world and never play international football again? This will ruin your career, it will put an end to the Ballon D’or campaign, it will change things for you, you can’t just do this because your girlfriend does it as well, this will be detrimental for you.”
The wood grooved at the edges, flattening out and curving so the edges weren’t too sharp.
“I refuse to stand by and submit myself to abuse. That’s what happens every time I go to that place, every time I go to camp I submit myself to abuse, torture, horrific conditions. The fact that you would even dare imply that I would do this for anybody but myself is preposterous. I am better than the condition I am being subkmitted to, I deserve better than to be objectified and treated as if I am dirt on that man’s shoe and I refuse to be treated as such. I have standards for myself and the people around me and I refuse to live by these for much longer. I’ll draft up the letter, I’ll send it to you for editing purposes and once your done you will send it to the RFEF, consequences be damned. You should be glad that I lasted two more windows then everyone else, honestly I’m ashamed that I didn’t do this earlier, but I’m ready to take a stand with everybody else now. I don’t want to play in a World Cup if it means this is how I will live my life.”
You looked up at your lawyer, hoping the fire burning in your soul was reflective in your eyes.
“This is a bad decision, you are thinking with your heart and not your head, this is unlike you.”
You pulled your eyes from the mahogany, standing up from your seat slowly.
“No, I’m thinking with my own interests, not yours, not my managers, not my bank accounts. I’m thinking with my mental health, my emotional health and my physical health. For the first time in my life I am taking time to focus on myself, so tyeah maybe it’s unlike me, but I’d like to think this might be the a better version of me, I’ll email you my letter, all you havr to do is forward it, if it’s such a struggle don’t even bother reading it, I don’t care what you have to say, I’m legally obligated to make you aware of any contractual issues so here I am. Give a fuck, don’t give a fuck, it doesn’t change anything for me, I’ve made my decision and nothing or nobody will make me change my mind.”
You didn’t wait around to hear what he planned to say in rebuttal, exiting the stuffy office as quickly as your legs would allow.
You made it to your car before you felt the tears flooding down your face. Even now, even after you’d tried to speak out you still felt like you were being silenced, like nothing had changed. That’s why you were doing what you were doing, why you knew this was what you needed to do. It didn’t make it any easier though, knowing that no matter what choices you made, even if they were for the good of you there were still going to be people around you who condemned them.
You were supposed to be at training, but you’d taken the day of to finalise all this bullshit. It was frustrating, knowing that the choices you were making for the good of yourself could end up being harmful to your career in a multitude of ways, it was all so fucking hard.
Everybody was at training, and yet here you were balling your eyes out in the carpark of your stupid fucking lawyers office.
If you hadn’t hit rock bottom at the last camp, the this was it, this was your final straw.
It was all too much, you’d been holding out for too long, but the mixture of the other 14 girls refusing to come back and Alexia’s injury had been enough of a motivation for Vilda to try and ruin your life. It had started with extra training after your sessions, then sessions in the mornings, then separating you from the rest of the team, limiting your diet, gym sessions, changing your schedules to everybody elses, punishing you for nothing, treating you like you were a slave to the Spanish Women’s team.
You were the best midfielder they had, excluding Alexia, and she was hurt, you were the scapegoat for the team, you were responsible for the wins and the reason for the losses.
You knew that with your leave, somebody else would end up taking your role, probably Aitana who was far to young to deal with that kind of pain, and you felt bad, you felt more guilty than you thought possible, but you couldnt do it for any longer, you couldn’t act like it wasn’t killing you on the inside for every second that you spent away with those people.
You hated it, you hated feeling like nothing, you hated feeling worthless, you hated living your life like it was pointless, you couldn’t do it for any longer, not when you were giving up every single part of yourself to keep yourself together.
You couldn’t stay how you were, crying in the drivers seat of your car milling over the memories of your last camp, you needed to leave, needed to go somewhere, needed to talk somebody.
Before you really knew what you were doing you’d started driving, letting the tears drip onto your lap and the steering wheel as you frantically drove your way through the city.
You couldn’t be alone, but you also couldn’t handle all the eyes of your teammates, so you drove to the one other place that you could think of where you hoped somebody would be.
You tried your hardest to wipe the tears from your face, but they kept falling, the sleeve of your shirt getting damper by the second as you tried to wipe up the evidence of your breakdown. It was useless, and eventually you gave up, stepping out of your car and ducking your head as you walked towards the lift and navigated your way through the apartment building.
The person you were looking for didn’t answer the door, instead you were put face to face with Olga.
“Hola chica, Ale didn’t tell me she was expecting visitors.”
You bit down on your lip, tapping your foot against the floor as you peeked around Olga, searching for the person you were seeking out.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t tell her, I can go home, I know she’s been busy with her rehab, I don’t even know how I ended up here.”
Olga tugged at your arm before you could spit anything else out, tugging you through the door and closing it from behind you.
“Nonsense chica, you’re very welcome here, Alexia is sitting out on the balcony doing her exercises, she’ll be more than happy to have your company, just head on through, your always welcome here.”
You nodded at Olga, smiling at her as much as you could with your lip still stuck between your teeth.
“Thank you, thank you so much, I really appreciate.”
You tried to ignore the tears that were still dripping down your face, it didn’t feel like you were crying, even though you were, it more felt like you were shedding a layer of yourself, the layer that was holding all of the trauma that you’d been holding in, like it was your way of getting rid of it all.
Alexia’s apartment was meticulously clean as ever, but you spotted her out in the sun easily.
She was standing outside, in a pose similar to ones you did in your yoga sessions.
She looked at peace, like she was calm, like she was serene, the complete polar opposite to how you felt and you really didn’t want to burden her with your problems, but you were here now anyways.
You tiptoed over to the glass sliding door, pushing it open, causing Alexia’s head to peak up at you. She looks at you with curiosity, but doesn;t move, instead her head nods you towards one of the outdoor lounges beside her, which you beeline for.
She stays in her position as she addresses you.
“The appointment with your lawyer didn’t go well then?”
You did a double take as you stared at Alexia, shocked at the information she’d somehow managed to obtain.
“You don’t take me for a idiota do you? Mapi told me you had a appointment you were keeping quiet about this morning, it doesn’t take a genius to figure it out who it must have been with, considering recent events. Although your girlfriend wasn’t smart enough to work it out herself.”
Alexia stayed in her stretch, looking at you as if to prompt you to tell her more.
“Yes, I had a appointment with my lawyer, Alexia.”
Alexia smirked to herself, she was one of the most obersvanet people you knew, nothing got by her, you weren’t all that surprised to find out that this hadn’t.
“You’ll be joining the group then?”
You hadn’t really comes to terms with it, let alone saying it out loud.
“That’s the plan, should be official by tomorrow.”
Tears were still dripping down your face, you couldn’t find yourself caring though.
“Good for you. You deserve better, we all deserve better, may we all hopefully make a change.”
Alexia wasn’t officially a part of the movement, but she was everyway besides a signature as equally involved as everybody else.
“It just feels like i’m letting the team down, that I’m letting everyone down.”
Alexia nodded at you, finally coming out of her stretch and walking over to sit down next to you.
“You’re doing what’s good for you chica, your doing something that is going to make you happier, that is going to make your life better. Nobody else matters beyond that, trust me.”
Alexia looked at you, like she was genuinely struggling to help you out in the moment. She had been your mentor at Barca for forever, you seeked out her advice more than anybody elses, especially in this moment.
“I don’t know how to do it anymore, it’s like he was trying to ruin my fucking life, like his whole purpose for everyday was to make my life a living hell, and I just couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t walk around camp acting like it was fine, I couldn’t smile at cameras and talk to the press and tell them about how great I was feeling when it was all lies, all I wanted to do was leave, or sleep, or die, all because of his and his staff. They were hardly feeding me, hardly letting me sleep, hardly giving me a break and expecting me to perform at the same level as everybody else, if not better. I just couldn’t do it anymore Ale, it was too much.”
Alexia’s arm placed itself on your knee, squeezing your covered skin.
“You shouldn’t have to, you needed to leave and you did, you made the right decision chica, you made a impossible decision that will make your life 100 times easier, it doesn’t make you weak, it makes you so incredibly brave for being able to identify that you were being treated wrongly and that you needed to remove yourself from that space.”
The tears kept falling, your pants were slowly becoming soaked with the raw emotion.
“Mapi did it because of the abuse, because she had a legitimate reason, I’m leaving because they worked me a little bit harder than everybody else, it feels like I’m overreacting.”
You could feel Alexia rolling her eyes from beside you.
“Really? Has Mapi told you that?”
Mapi had told you that you deserved the world, you deserved everything you wanted, you deserved to be treated like a queen, not how the RFEF was treating you. She’d told you the decision was yours, that she would support you no matter what you did, but she’d also told you that after every camp you came back with a little bit less of yourself, that Vilda was stripping parts of you away to use at his mercy.
“It’s not the same thing, Patri, Pina, Mapi, they all have good reasons, they’ve all been hurt, Vilda is just trying to make me better, trying to make me worthy.”
Alexia’s hand squeezed tighter.
“You’re lying to yourself and you know it. As long as he is in charge, you aren’t going to get treated how you deserve, none of us are. We’ve all paid our dues, yet they don’t give a shit, they break us all down until we’ve got nothing left to give. They broke me down until I did my acl, if you hadn’t of left they would have done the same to you. It’s nonstop, even if it isn’t the same kind of abuse as Mapi, it’s still abuse, they still rip out every part of you in the process. Each time you come back you have less of yourself to offer, but they keep taking, and taking, they make us feel nothing. It’s a waste, it’s a waste of the wonderful life we’ve all been gifted. We deserve to be happy, we deserve to be free of the pain.”
You nodded your head, you’d been avoiding telling Mapi about all of this. You were conscious that she was still working through a lot of her own trauma, and you didn’t want to reopen scars that were only just beginning to heal.
“I don’t know what to do Ale, I sign the papers, I write the letters and I’m taking a stand, I’m trying to make a change. I stay, I wreck it all, but I keep my career. It feels like I’m at a crossroads with myself, and I can’t talk about it weith Maps because god forbid shes already been through enough with her own struggle through it all, she doesn’t need me on top of that.”
Alexia stood back up, getting back onto her mat and pushing herself into another stretch, all whilst she maintained eye contact with you.
“Mapi’s talked to you about her struggles, si? She’s burdening you with her own problems, yet it doesn’t feel that way, because you love her and you’d do anything to make her pain less. I guarantee she’d feel the exact same way. You’ve been through a lot, none of us will ever be able to completely comprehend what you’ve been through, but if you started talking to your loved ones about it we’d be able to support you better. Or a therapist, I know Barca has been giving you sessions, but I mean a real psychologist, not just a person who tells you that you need a day off. You need somebody to help you, to actually make you feel like you deserve better than how they treated you, because I know that you know that but I don’t think you really believe it.”
The tears were slowly coming to a standstill, slipping less frequently down your face as Alexia talked to you.
“I don’t want to make her hurt any more than she already has.”
Alexia just looked at you, with that double eyebrow raise and little crinkle in her forehead.
“If you think that Maria wouldn’t do anything for you, even if it meant sucking every single inch of pain from your body and putting it into hers, she would do it and she would do it with a smile on her face. Her whole world, her whole solar system revolves around you and she’d want you to talk to her about this. She knows better than anybody else what you’re experiencing, she’s literally been where you are, so why not talk to her about it?”
It was true, for as long as Mapi and you had been together she’d tried to fix every single thing, she would do anything to make you feel better, this didn’t feel the same though.
“She deserves to live in a world where Vilda, where the RFEF, don’t affect her anymore. She signed the petition, she’s cleaned her hands of it all, and I should have done it with her, but I didn’t. I chose to keep playing for the benefit of my career, because I was greedy and decided that a Ballon D’or and any kind of accolade I was a shot at was more important then taking a stand and I hate it. I hate that now that I’ve won things that suddenly it’s all hit me that I don’t like what’s been happening, and I don’t want to support it. Mapi doesn’t deserve to go through it a second time, all because I was greedy.”
Alexia switched sides on her stretch, the sun was radiating off of her olive skin and her blonde hair, she looked ethereal.
“Have you told her anything about it?”
Alexia was frowning, like she was shocked by your actions.
“She knows that I was struggling at camp, she told me I was welcome to talk to her. After the last one she knew something had changed, she told me she was worried and I shook her off, because I thought she was being overprotective, but she was right, she had reason to be worried, I wasn’t okay. I’m not okay, i don’t know how to process it all.”
Alexia nodded.
“Go home, tell her what’s happening, see what she says, I think it’ll be a lot better than whatever you’ve thought up. Mapi has been my bestfriend for years, she’s dated my sister, she’s dated my friends and I can confidently tell you that she loves you more than any of them, you’re her do or die, all she’ll want to do is support you, please just go and talk to her.”
Alexia looked at you with such conviction and honesty that you couldn’t find it in you to try and fight her on the topic.
“Thank you Ale, I needed this, I needed to talk to somebody, needed to feel less crazy.”
Alexia did one last stretch before standing up, pulling you into a tight hug before you could pull away.
“You’re not crazy chica, you’re going through a very real, very hard time, and you deserve to have the people around you show you how much they love you.”
Alexia let go of you, shoving you back towards the door.
“Go talk to your girl, and sign those papers, and be happy, enjoy life, enjoy peace. You deserve it, chica.”
You nodded into Alexia’s shoulder, letting go of her and slipping back into her apartment, leaving her to get back to her stretching.
You shivered when you spotted Mapi’s car already parked in her spot. You knew you’d be cutting it close with getting home earlier then her, but you’d held a silent hope that you would be the first home. You hesitated to exit your car, scared of what the inside of your apartment held. You weren’t scared so much, more a little bit tentative of the conversation that you were about to have, knowing that it could majorly impact your relationship. In your heart, you knew that Mapi would love you no matter what, but it didn’t calm the nerves inside of you as you pulled your keys from the ignition, pulled out the papers that your lawyer had given you and exited your car.
The whole walk from your car, to the elevator and then down the hallway to your apartment had your heart thrumming inside of your chest. Your hands were quite literally shaking as you pushed your key into the door.
You toed your shoes off at the door, slotting them down beside the door before slowly walking your way through the entrance. It wasn’t hard to find Mapi, she was right in front of you, sitting down at the island bench, patting Bagheera and eating a post training salad. You knew that there was one meant for you still sitting on the shelf of your fridge, from when the two of you had meal planned yesterday. She looked so undisturbed, with the afternoon light coming in through the gaps in the blinds and the general silence that you were about to break.
You announce yourself by slinging your bag down against the wall, a loud enough noise that seems to wake Mapi from her happy daze.
She smiles as soon as her eyes set on you and it only makes the weight in your gut feel ten times heavier and the pain in your heart ten times worse.
You wanted to turn around and walk right back out the door you’d just walked through, but you couldn’t, not with the way that Mapi looked at you, like her whole day had been made by your appearance.
“Hola bebita, how was your meeting?”
Mapi’s smiling ear to ear, quite literally, you swear you can see every single one of her teeth. It had hurt you to lie to Mapi about where you were going today, telling her that you’d had a crucial appointment with your manager about some media things, it wasn’t a direct lie. You had met with your manager, instead of it being positive though, it had been quite the opposite.
You didn’t have any words to reiterate to Mapi, so instead you just picked up the papers that were tucked away in your hands and placed them down on the island infront of her.
Mapi looked at you with confusion for a few seconds.
“Just read them, you’ll understand it more once you have.”
Mapi didn’t hesitate, picking up the first piece of paper and scanning over it, before moving onto the second, then the third and so on, till she’d made it through the entire stack.
You stood anxiously on your toes the whole time, balancing from one foot to the other as you contemplated how Mapi was going to reply to this sudden change.
When she did finish, she looked up at you, a lot of questions hidden behind her curious eyes.
“I’m resigning, or requesting they don’t call me up. I don’t want to play for a federation that doesn’t care about me. I’m sorry I didn’t do it earlier, but I wasn’t ready and I’m sorry I’m bother you with it now but I’m also sorry I didn’t tell you about it earlier, I met with my lawyer for the first time today to sign the documents and write my statement. If it all goes to plan then they should be out in the next week. I don’t want to do it anymore, I can’t do it anymore, I’m sorry.”
Mapi blinked a few times, like you’d just blindsided her completely, and you figured you had.
“I didn’t even really know it was happening until after last camp, and I just realised that I was so exhausted and so tired and so sick of it all that I couldn’t do it again. I should have done it earlier, I should have been a part of it all from the start but I was scared and I still am scared Maps. This is supposed to be my job, I’m supposed to be grateful for the opportunities I’m given and yet I feel like I’m a fraud and I’m lying when I say that because I’m not grateful and I’m not happy and I can’t do it anymore, I just can’t. I’ve been praying every night that I get injured, so that I get a break like Ale, and I don’t want to feel like that anymore.”
Mapi just stood up and pulled you into her arms, silencing the rambling and making you realise that you were now crying again.
She slowly led you towards the couch, bringing you into her arms as you tried to take control of yourself.
It felt like every piece of anguish, every piece of fear, every piece of internal hatred was slowly being pulled from your body and it felt so good, like you were somehow being healed.
Mapi wiated until you were coherent enough, until you felt more resurfaced, and less like the bloodn was rushing through your ears and every though of self-doubt was spirally through the different ridges of your brain.
“Princesa, you’ve made this decision for you, si? Not because of me, not because of anybody else, because you believe this is best for you?”
You nodded into her chest, enjoying the feeling of your own skin pressed directly to hers.
“I’m sick of them making me feel this way Maps, I don’t like it, I don’t think it’s right.”
Mapi’s body was surrounding you, her scent, her feel, her everything, and it was all you’d needed today, everything that Alexia had assured you would make you feel better.
Mapi’s salad was forgotten on the counter.
Bagheera was somewhere else.
It was just the two of you, just the two of you to face everything.
“We’re put into boxes, as women, men try to make us be everything and yet nothing. It’s not right, we’re expected to be as good as the men, but we have to behave eloquently, say our pleases and thank yous and never be ungrateful for the piss poor conditions we put up with. We’re supposed to be passionate, but we’re not allowed to over react in any way. We can only underperform, not overperform. There are no expectations for us, because we’re women and we’re supposed to be worse than the men, but they’re are also so many expectations for us to meet. It’s okay for you to be done with that, there is nothing wrong with you saying no to constantly being abused. You’re not a fraud bebita and I’m here for you no matter what. You’re my girlfriend first, a person second and a soccer player last. It doesn’t matter, none of it matters, you matter, you’re feelings and how you feel is what matters.”
Mapi’s hand pulled your head from her neck, her lips connecting with your forehead with ease.
“I’m not doing it anymore Maps. I want to be strong, I want to say no. I want to be a part of the right side of history. I don’t want to sit around pretending everything’s fine when it’s not fine. It’s nowhere near fine and until there is a change it won’t be.”
Mapi nodded, pressing a series of kisses to your forehead.
“Then we’ll work it out, you’ll keep me in the loop and we’ll figure it out together, no more hiding these big feelings from me. We’ll go and see our therapists and take soe time off and do whatever you need to feel safe and happy, because what matters is you, nobody else, si?”
You nodded your head once again, enjoying the same smile that her face was covered in. her lips migrated down to your cheeks, pressing kisses to the rosiest parts, pushing the tears away.
“I’ve got you bebita, we’ve got each other, we’re going to be fine, we all are.”
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fuck-customers · 3 days
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Customer drops her dog off for grooming at 9 am. Is quoted the standard 3-4 hours for the groom. Comes back at 11 am asking if her dog is done. Obviously it’s not. Customer asks why, since “she was here right at open”. Because the groomer has five fucking dogs to do, dumbass, you didn’t book an express. Customer complains she lives “all the way in [town]” (which I’d guess is only a 20-30 minute drive away, depending on which side of the town she lives, similar to my own commute) but like, what do you want me to do? YOU’RE the one who wasted your trip out here instead of calling like a smart person. Customer was not happy when I told her “it takes 3-4 hours and it’s only been 2, the groomer will call you when he’s done” but too fucking bad 🤷🏼‍♀️
To her credit, she didn’t throw a fit or anything, just looked sour, and left without incident. But like, why would you drive all the way to the store without checking if your dog’s ready yet when YOU’RE the one complaining about how far away you live?? And the dog was done and got picked up just before noon, exactly as planned.
Posted by admin Rodney
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infernalurge · 3 days
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The Astral Prism Isn't Grindr!- Why the Emperor didn't catfish you.🦑
Very long, rambling post I wrote while manic at 4 am. Enjoy!
I feel like the worst thing you can actually say about Emp in regards to his actions towards the player is that he lies by omission. But even then, to consider it lying you basically have to work from the perspective that you as a player, person, character or whatever, are entitled to know everything about someone you just met, who might have some very good reasons for not wanting to reveal certain things
He didn't "catfish" you the prism isn't grindr lmao?! And the game/companions/etc repeat to you over and over that the Dream Visitor is some kind of manufactured vision. You all have one and it's specific to your individual minds. He wasn't exactly doing some deepcover shit with a fake backstory to get your cryptowallet information or whatever real-life equivalence you keep trying to make. As if you run into alien squid monsters every day or something!
It's doubly bizarre because there is an extremely popular companion character whose entire arc is ACTUALLY lying to you about who they are, only admitting it when you catch them attacking you in your sleep, and then goes on to try to ACTUALLY manipulate you with sex and intimacy while at that point, not actually feeling it. This is the most popular character in the fandom btw- Astarion.
Emperor's morality is held up to a ridiculous standard. Not even the companions are held to that level- not even close!
A better equivalence to his situation than "catfishing" (a term completely exclusive to our world) would be if a sentient, alien creature was stranded on our planet and had to use a disguise to y'know....not be shot at and killed by confused humans? Why the heck would your brain first jump to catfishing? Girl if you approached your DG as a tindr date that's on you! Lliterally the only prompt the game gives you before creating them is "you need a guardian" (At least currently that's how it works, after official release.)
if you met a kind of weird guy and fell for him and he then revealed he's actually a sentient squid monster, I don't think your first response would be "OMG YOU CATFISHED ME?" I'm pretty sure it would be "HOLY FUCK A SQUID MONSTER!" because it would be very obvious and apparent (by virtue of them being a squid monster) that the intent was not to "catfish" you, but to survive a world that would be actively hostile towards him, on sight.
We accept this type of "ambiguous morality for the sake of survival" from characters like Astarion who are traditionally attractive, but we don't accept it from a being whose very appearance, forces them into that position of moral ambiguity. Emperor is not afforded the same privilege of even being able to consider full honesty, because just one look at him could make someone hysterical. Hiding himself from you is not an active choice he's able to make, anymore than a turtle can choose to break open it's shell- it will die.
Even if YOU wouldn't kill him, what about companions like Lae'zal, who are already suspicious of him and will definitely cut him down at that point? Even if you think that would be a good thing, you would then lose your protection from the tadpole/the Absolute. The game basically wouldn't exist without the Prism.
Let's also not use "well Astarion is traumatized" as an excuse here. Emperor is pretty obviously traumatized as well, in addition to being a brain-eating squid monster and having to manage that part of his nature, the way Astarion has to handle his. Yet he's still more up front than Astarion was. Astarion can accidentally kill you while drinking from you and he still doesn't reveal who he is to the others, AND pretends he doesn't know what happened to you lol.
Note my point here isn't "Astarion bad" but simply that if you have room in your heart to sympathize with characters like Astarion, then there's no reason you can't squeeze my man Emp in there too. He doesn't do anything significantly worse than any of the other main characters but is the most hated, and it's literally because of this ridiculous perception of him "catifshing" the player. The most media illiterate take I have ever seen in my life, honestly
Like first off, he's a squid, and secondly! ☝️ Read all that again.
tl;dr if you feel "cafished" by the Emperor you simply weren't paying attention for more than half the game. Fantasy might not be for you if you can't remove the plot from real life circumstances and turn complex fantasy monsters into human romance scammers, as if they're actually alike in any meaningful way.
Read more books maybe. That might help.
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Why hello there.
Listen,I don’t have much to say about the newest LO episode so here’s an ares ranking to go along with the other ones.
Spoilers.
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Percy Jackson:
6/10
Look,Ares is a really weird figure when it comes to how the media presents him.
Almost always they present him as this sexist frat boy when in mythology he is:
A reported protector of mistreated woman.
The patron god of the amazons and was worshipped to the point that their leader had 2 babies with him.
Scored the GODDESS PF LOVE AND BEAUTY and there is no way you cannot convince me she doesn’t have some pretty high standards(even though apparently you can convince most of the writers on this list)
And as much as I love Percy Jackson,it is not devoid of crimes.
In the first book,he helps Luke/Kronos steal Zeus’ master bolt and Hades’ helm of invisibility as to start a civil war within the gods.id say this is a pretty good portrayal overall.
…until we get to the second book.
This myth will be very important so long story short:a daughter of ares got r*** by a son of Poseidon so Ares,like any reasonable and bloodthirsty god of war,fucking killed him.
After this,he got put on trial for murder as if he wasn’t the literal god of bloody war,and all the ladies vouched for him so he got set free.
Let’s just say,Rick Riordan didn’t know of this myth.
In the second book,there’s a scene where Clarisse La Rue,a DAUGHTER of ares talks to him through a magic mirror.
There,he threatens her and says he should have sent one of his sons on the quest.and keep in mind she is his FAVORITE DAUGHTER.
So yeah.
I don’t really like this portrayal but he gets points for bringing Clarisse and (technically)Frank into this world since I like them both.also the fact that Percy could tell he had beef with him even without having any other memory.
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Lore Olympus:
1/10
FUCK THIS GUY
Remember when I said that modern Ares was more often than not a sexist frat boy?we’ll add “predator” and “Reddit nice guy” to that list because RS can’t write.
If in Percy Jackson Aphrodite had terrible standards here said standards are so much worse.
He spends MONTHS trying to seduce a 19-YEAR-OLD and then tries to marry her without her consent.
Also,sir,YOU HAVE THE GODDESS OF LOVE AND BEAUTY FULLY AT YOUR DISPOSAL AND YOURE PICKING A GURL WHO DOESNT EVEN KNOW HIW TO USE A COMPUTER????
Great.this guy is a predator,Reddit nice guy,AND stupid.
I remember saying that the only character who could get a lowers rating than LO Persephone being LO hades and then I remembered this fuck existed.
Fuck him.
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Hades:
10/10
Your know when you see something and then immediately want to wash your eyes with soap?this is my soap.
He is my third favorite Olympian in the game,coming third to Hermes and Artemis.
So here’s a few reasons why I like him:
Doom anything with impending doom and the increasing doom damage boon does absurd amounts of damage.
Curse of nausea is one of the best duos in the game.
He respects woman.(oh look they finally Aphrodite standards)
His quest is stupidly easy and he was the first Olympian who’s bond I maxed out.
I know this joke has been made so many times but.he really is a Chthonic simp.
He doesn’t get too pissed if you don’t pick him is trial of gods.hes just here for the bloodshed.
It may be just the fact that almost every other interpretation of ares is bad,but I really like him.
Also Aphrodite wearing his face paint in hades 2-
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OSP:
7/10
He’s cool.
I really don’t have much else to add except the helmet stays on during sex.
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Gods school:
5/10
Welp Back to the incels-
Him straight up telling Aphrodite that he can do whatever he wants because she won’t leave is just.why.
I don’t get why people go to this myth,turn it around,and act as if they’ve done a service by making Ares miserable when in the myths it was already a good ending.
What is with the obsession with making ares a toxic ex boyfriend when in the myths him and ‘dite were literally love and war.
Another issue I have with gods school is the fact they made Aphrodite a Karen Smith when in the myths shes a Regina George but that’s a problem for the Aphrodite ranking.
Also I just realized the Aphrodite Hephaestus ares myth is the og “I fell in love with a bad boy story”-
Epic:the musical:
8/10
I don’t have a physical picture of him but I already like him.
The only time he he appears is during a bit of an unfinished song but he does bring up some pretty good points,like the Scylla thing.
Also the fact Athena didn’t directly refute any of his points but instead persuaded him with the fact that the moment Ody gets home the suitors are going to be fucked is surprisingly great.
Also can I just say how absolutely hyped I am for god games?Aphrodite’s part fucking rocks and I’m excited for Apollo and Hephaestus.
Also here’s my ranking for epic Hermes since I wasn’t part of the fandom back then:
10/10
*insert dolphin laugh here*
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beesmygod · 7 hours
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today is webcomics day. i am bea and i make "A Ghost Story" - part 3: sketch 1
ed note from the future: this got long. its going mostly under a readmore for everyone's sake. and i didnt even finish sketching, just trying to explain what is going through my mind while trying to sketch. look, if i write down my process in exhausting detail people will realize im completely insane. this is a net benefit to anyone trying to interact with me in the future who thinks i can be reasoned with. community service. thank you for allowing me to post this shit lol
hmmm. giving up on the first few panels for right now. here's what i'm thinking about as i sketch this:
too many of my panels were talking heads or constantly relied on one point perspective. i have been trying to work against this for a while with mixed results. sometimes the result is so bad i have to scrap what i did and start over but sometimes it's "good enough for TV"* and i hit publish on it. no risks, no reward after all. can't get better if you don't try.
in this first panel, i have two people having a back and forth conversation through a weird magic hole in the floor/wall. maxine is laying on a couch with hole right above her head. homestar runner will demonstrate what i mean:
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however, there are logistical problems with maxine that homestar runner doesnt have. maxine's right shoulder is dislocated, so she can't lay on that side, or any side that would put pressure on the joint. im realizing i don't actually know what position would be most comfortable in her situation or how she would instinctually arrange her body to avoid pain. i start looking up videos from physical therapists on how they recommend patients sleep for some ideas.
also i start looking up what women look like sleeping on couches. how does the human body fold up. because this isn't it.
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anyway, this was my first effort with the first panels.
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for reference, the last page ends like this:
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the top left of the sketch would have been the hopi clown back on the shelf with the "camera" tilting above it to reveal maxine. while this keeps the relevant object from the previous page in frame as a piece of connective tissue between updates....i'm struggling to fit the second character in. the one talking from the hole. maybe there's still hope for this? it's not terrible. initially i nuked it but maybe i can make this work.
fuck! she needs a pillow or two to make this work. this video is right, that DOES look naturally comfortable compared to the standard fetal position that would pull the affected shoulder inward. i didn't draw any pillows into the stupid establishing shot of the office bc its not the kind of couch you are expected to sleep on!!! this is a man's business office!!! i thought i was so smart!!
basically every couch comes with decorative pillows though, and the shot of the room didn't include the wall the "camera" was up against. my 2-point perspective failure might have paid off here lol. if i can establish that the second character is talking through the hole, he can use his rayman hands to reach across the room and get the pillow for her. it can be part of his personal campaign to show maxine he means her no immediate harm. the pillows were just out of frame. lurking. ok let's try it again. uhhhh after i eat some lunch
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*my friend kelly had an anecdote from working in animation that im going to retell badly from memory. her boss would take the work she labored over to meet by deadline and would laugh at it, saying "ah, its terrible! but good enough for TV". and while extremely mean, he had a salient point: it never has to be perfect. it just needs to be good enough to be seen. sometimes i seriously think about this anecdote when im dissatisfied with my own art. it's bad. but it's good enough for tv.
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slavhew · 11 months
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overdue backposting of the one man mental illness (and two man, sometimes)
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reel-fear · 1 month
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Just a little follow up on that last post but just in general I think one of the reasons I've really stopped caring for railing on the Playtime devs... Is just because it feels like so much of it is just speculative nonsense trying to make every single thing they do secretly evil or lazy or bad. Why isn't it enough to discuss the Actual bad things they did [the fact they used to run a shady content farm before doing game work, the fact they tried to sell lore to their fans via NFTs, etc] it's hard for me to engage with content that rightfully critiques that bc oftentimes they then spiral into speculative 'so now we have to tell you why this moment where an employee blinks in the game is code for the devs secretly stole all their code from Bendy and kill babies as a hobby'.
Which makes me turn off my brain and not want to take any other points they make seriously, bc like I said if you lie to me to try and convince me of your point, I'm not gonna take anything else you say seriously bc I won't know if it's true or just something you made up anymore.
It honestly feels like everyone just keeps making shit up bc Poppy Playtime used to be the internet punching bag but now that the NFTs thing isn't the hottest topic to discuss about it anymore we all just need a reason to make fun of it and the people who like it. Which just kinda feels like unfair cringe culture, because if our real problem is the devs being greedy and shady why isn't the same effort put into roasting similar devs like the Bendy team? We can't suddenly say 'well actually being a bit greedy isn't That bad' when it's a team we like instead of one we all decided is 'cringe n bad'.
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sensazioneultra · 1 year
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Kaho as Momono Nana in Episode 6
SILENT (2022)
#silent 2022#silent#サイレント#jdramaedit#jdramasource#asiancentral#kaho#asiandramasource#dailyasiandramas#jdrama#momono nana#nico.gif#i saw two (2) comments that profoundly misunderstood her character her feelings her motivations#and i decided nope. not doing this today. nor tomorrow. i am going to ignore things random strangers say about this show from now on#if anyone is watching this and wants to talk to me about it then my inbox is open <3 but no more reading random comments on mdl lmao#anyway i really am loving how complex each of the characters in this show are it's really great how it doesn't shy away from showing the#uglyness of people too. nana is not a bad person at all. nor is sou. none of them are really it's just they're human#and human beings are complicated things. we fuck up we feel things we don't wanna feel so we shut down we isolate we lash out we say and do#things we shouldn't say or do. i really appreciate nana's character in particular bc disabled people do NOT need to be perfect and make no#mistakes. minorities are always held to a higher standard than other people and it's really unfair especially bc if anything#living in a world that's not built for you and that throws obstacles onto your path at all time will make you MORE imperfect!! angrier!#sadder! more prone to feeling like everything is against you (bc a lot of it IS against you!) and on top of that you have LESS tools to deal#with it and less people to help you with it and it's no wonder disabled people (in this case but people belonging to minorities in general)#can sometimes react in ways that are deemed 'wrong' and sometimes yeah they aren't the best healthiest way! that's true and it needs to be#recognized by the person like nana here will need to understand she didn't have a great reaction and work on it not only for others but for#herself too and first and foremost!! bc the problem lies within her (but caused by the world around her) and can sometimes hurt others yes#but it hurts HER most of all !!! but really i think blaming her or anyone in similar situations entirely and making them the villain helps#no one. so yeah. i really hope we get to see nana come to terms with her feelings and why she reacted the way she did and even more i hope#she is understood by sou and by tsumugi bc she needs people on her side!!!#i wrote too many tags will they all show up LMAO
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legionofpotatoes · 1 year
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been playing bits and pieces of horizon forbidden west! game's pretty as hell
#horizon forbidden west#photo mode#my edits#yannow. it got me thinking too. the npc fidelity in this game is off the fucking shits. never seen anything like it#even ​secondary dialogues are leaving all the competition in the dust. it's an insane level of work#major burnout red flags for sure. but also maybe talking about engines as specialized tools instead of ubiquitous ones isn;t so bad?#i mean there's definitely trends. ramming down RPGs down frostbite's throat has never worked well#while decima is tearing up the open worlds and tech fidelity quotas like nbd even on prev gen#is it really about implementation at this point#maybe some engines just. work best for certain types of hard goals. and choosing that right is what matters#i pkayed this after ragnarok and that game looks embarassing next to hfw. and I'm not even saying it flippantly. I stand by what i've said#shorter games less scope lower fidelity etc. for healthier dev teams. but this can be a scalability tell tale? maybe using something#like decima can mean an easier time for a standard EA dev cycle *without* hitting these insane fidelity goals. just thinking out loud#cause forever salty about frostbite. probably wrong but hey! I am on a blogging website famous for its phobia of deeper contexts#or maybe playing as aloy gave me that stupid self confidence juice#the way she bulldozes into delicate foreign policies with nothing but her ego and hutzpah really proves that whiteness is alive and well#in whatever variant of post-post-apocalypse this story is set into. they better interrogate her issues cause otherwise this plot will like#fizzle out under the weight of her self-righteousness lmao
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welcometogrouchland · 5 months
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I support the "Batman was unfairly biased to Stephanie for XYZ reasons" crowd so strongly bc DC claims that Bruce is a master planner who is able to understand anyone's psychology but he didn't realize that literally every single one of Steph's problems as a teenager would've been solved by her joining a shitty punk band. If he couldn't figure that much out then he didn't understand her for a minute
#ramblings of a lunatic#PLEASE TALK TO ME I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON STEPHANIE IN A SHITTY PUNK BAND#her bandmates have turned into ocs it's stage 5 at this point boys#anyway what is steph dealing w/ pre-52 as spoiler that got her in hot water?#1. the anger issues. easily fixed by her getting to scream about beating her dad to death without actually doing it#2. nobody fucking listens to her (including batman). well when u are playing music ppl are definitely fucking listening#3. has no non-batfam friends and thus ends up feeling abandoned almost every time she gets kicked out of the group. bandmates are friends!#don't like being in your shitty house? go to your band mates house and jam!#need to articulate the anger issues in a way that doesn't disturb your frazzled paranoid boyfriend? write angsty songs!#also I do genuinely have a lot of thoughts on how music was applied to Stephanie's character and what it tells us about her#like she loved it. clearly. and she was GOOD at it too. steph is constantly perceived as a screw up and has pretty low opinion of herself#piano was something she could take pride in. in i believe issue 113 of tims og robin series-#-tim is AMAZED at her playing all these years later. so is nocturna a few issues earlier#there's a standard visual language in comics for good or bad music- notation drawn in either shaky or smooth lines#stephs are all smooth and golden. she's good even after all these years of not practicing#but all she says to tim after he compliments her is ''i used to be better...'' SHE SEES THE WORST IN HERSELF AND HER ABILITIES#SHE DESERVES A CHANCE TO FEEL GOOD AT AT LEAST ONE THING LIKE SHE FINALLY GOT TO AS BATGIRL IN HER SOLO#and onto my final point: dinah has several times expressed some degree of fondness/admiration for steph. steph has likewise trained w dinah#and thinks she's cool as fuck. which makes sense. bc dinah is cool as fuck#and what is dinah in??? that's right. a band#steph should join dinahs band for her mental health. this has been an essay#stephanie brown#spoiler dc#dc batgirl#batgirls#<- since that series re-canonized pianist steph!! bless them!
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mintacle · 2 years
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mikkouille · 1 year
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I know it makes sense cuz duh, twitter's in the name, but boysplanet-twitter really is the place where taste dies
#🧍yall cmon....#and theyre so Shady for WHAT. girlies will side eye an imaginary lad for supporting a Dozen while having one in their pfp‼️#makes me spite vote for their most hated contestants fr#'u guys r voting for x UNDESERVING guy when MY one should have UR vote he DESERVES IT' well fuck you lol im voting daeul again‼️‼️#'we HAVE to make this final lineup GOOD' we have to make it suck itd be funnier#lets all vote for the shit guys tje look on mnet's face will be priceless#then its my fault for even going to twitter but i didnt chose to see boy planet content there the alg just puts it under my eyes cyz#i made the mistake of joining ppl who were once bitching abt the girls who r so vocal about how chiu n my klorbo are alledged lookalikes#not theyre NAWT lmao‼️#coming in like 'i agree they dont look alike' setting myself up to seeing the WORST takes ever formulated later#anyway daeul sweep#also its very clear that despite whzt their self righteous words say in opposing themselves against the 'ur just voting for visual'#they r HELLA basing their standard on it too#cuz like im a junhyeoner but he did NOT do well on the K vs G stage lmao#'their stage was ok' it was NAWT n i can say in unbiased words cuz half the team there is my top9s fjdjsjsjsjdjdj#i was gritting my teeths bro 'haha its not. so. so bad haha' < with tears in my eyes#but theyre collectively good looking aint they 🤨 weird‼️#just like how they'll last five seconds hating on jay before calling him ugly lmao u guys are TRANSPARENT#they can hate on him all tbey want doesnt change that he's The vocalist of the season oh well
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monsterbisexual · 7 months
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i hate how i feel doing or not doing certain stuff for/because of the pain + fatigue since im a fat person :///
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jvzebel-x · 9 months
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🦋
#ive been in kind of a depressive low point for. a sec now lmao.#it swung down after the months of Bad Mania in response to the meds balancing out i think idk.#either way ive been in a weird state of disassociative depression for a couple months now#but i can feel it swinging back as the month goes on&we get closer&closer to autumn lmao.#right about now for a couple different reasons is when my Internal Balance starts to shift yearly in response to the anxiety#that i wasted all the sunshine. 🫠🫠🫠#idk. its putting me in that weird spot where my depressive episode isn't exactly Over yet#but i can already feel that buzzing in my bones going on lmao.#its also bringing up weird thoughts i guess as my brain scrambles for actual reasons to be so anxious#&just like when i wake up in pain that always bleeds over into reasons to be Angry not Anxious bc Angry is easier lmao.#like hypocrisy has been a topic of discussion in my life recently bc of everything back home&if i let my head spiral for too long#ill end up back at the point where my shithead ex told me for 3yrs that i was a hypocrite w double standards#w his primary example being that he Let Me talk to other guys but i didnt Let Him talk to other women#w the one sole example being how after i moved my entire life across an ocean to an entirely foreign place where i had no support but him#i was made extremely uncomfortable when i found out he'd been talking to his ex during the entire process.#so my attitude toward that translated into i guess a weird boundary that i never actually set bc he enjoyed to call me a hypocrite lmao.#its just weird having my thoughts slide from discussions about hypocritical actions involving Lahaina&its handling by the fake state#over to old thoughts about how i just let someone call me a hypocrite to my face for years bc he wanted to w no actual reason lmao.#&this sort of All Over The Board weirdness is really only something that happens in these strange Inbetween times for me.#... pls for the love of everything holy let this fucking be over soon lmao i solve these problems Poorly bc these time periods#wreck my impulse control lmao.
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magnoliamyrrh · 2 years
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#...... i think too its not just that im bony#its all the new cuts too#...this is the first time after uhhh. round 2 of taking things way too far that ive seen myself. alone. naked. in a coldly lit changing#room#like#fuck#we really did a number on this body#ive been joking for a long time that i look like an okapi or a zebra but like... damn#idk they dont bother me. they never have#im not grosses out by them or even ashamed nor do i even think theyre ugly honestly. but#along with all the bones i just had this feeling of like. oh lol this aint normal. again like..... I looked like A Creature#which on one hand kinda sick bc slightly nonhuman looking half dead but still beautiful but kinda scary creature is exactly what i was#going for in my teen years. and w the meds ive achieved it with 0 severe anorexic stress or obsession or even feeling hunger basically at#all. just empty#but im...older now#and. yea idk if that's really the standard i have anymore#.......what i see now is just. wear. i see my pain and trauma and my souls repeted death. in the way this flesh looks#..... i think back then i used to get a lot more enjoyment out of having a physical representation of how bad im doing psychologically#but i just. dont enjoy my own pain and suffering that much anymore lmao. even i managed to get fed up with the masochism past a certain#point#..... and i think its also that. while im definitely not great (i did spend the last weeks to months posting on here abt how i wanna die#every day lmao) ive also been A LOT worse#all the scars are from... a lot worse. all the bones - i usually only saw them like this when i was a lot worse#..... its almost like idk. looking at it (me) with more sober eyes#.....i hate how tired i look too#i really need to quit smokiny#that shits doing me worse than the not eating or the cutting or any other damn thing
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seokmattchuus · 1 year
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hey saw u got asks about the kamdens dad situation and i kinda wanted to share more just since the entire situation is really crazy. basically mr na has been hosting twitter spaces where he’s been sharing incredibly personal family details about things like family suicides and keeps giving these really backhanded compliments to kamden. he said “Tbh, I’m his biggest critic. I was worried about his singing despite him working so hard on his dancing. He worked really hard on his rapping and now, he’s not bad.” he also made some really insensitive comments about how the bit with the native american headdress wasn’t cultural appropriation even tho kamden was the only one who wasn’t laughing at it during the show. kamden actually called him in the middle of his last space to ask him to end it. i felt like i should share just cuz while some ppl r being rude i didnt want ppl calling mr na’s actions wrong to be misinterpreted as talking about a different situation.
I'll start by saying I guess this is a continuation from the earlier stuff? Like, he's just going on and on? But, again, this is a grown man. Of course, it can be seen as off putting, but he's no different than any parent on facebook oversharing on what their kids are up to (maybe not but I don't know how twt really works so I'm not sure what the spaces were like). There's really nothing wrong with any of this, except for the suicides, that's a bit questionable. He's not keeping up with the internet the way most bp watchers are. He's just a middle-aged man talking to the void. He's probably just really into the fact that he can talk to people who know who kamden is (parents aren't exactly known to be the most private about their kids, les be real here). Or the fact that he can talk to people who support his son the same way he does.
The criticisms aren't that much of a red flag either, in my opinion (could be because I grew up in the same boat) but from my understanding, most parents are their kids' #1 critic, and maybe it's just the quote you chose, but that doesn't seem so backhanded. It seems pretty objective to me? He's not coming off as insulting or overly praising. Just stating what it is.
The cultural stuff isn't really my place to comment on because I missed that bit entirely. I don't know what was said.
And I think the person who called had to have been kamden's twin. Trainees can't have their phones. Or at least can't make it known that they have them. Everyone who's ever been on the show makes a big deal of having no personal technology.
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