#no but really i love the community here and how we're as supportive as we can be as writers

[polyamorouscultureis]

Don't know if this is for advice but I need to confess this to SOMEONE outside the 4 of us. For many reasons, no one outside the 4 people mentioned here know anything about this

I'm a happily married man with a wonderful wife of 10 years. She's my best friend, my lover, and every bit the partner I need.

We're both well aware of our poly natures and have even tried (unsuccessfully) to open up to a third. It wasn't the right person or fit but we at least tried. Outside of that we've both had some FwB and it's never had any negative impact on our relationship.

But now I actually fell in love.

I fell in love with a streamer and what started as parasocial became just plain social to becoming very intimate and real. The kicker, this streamer girl is also happily married to her own man (4 years now) and they are also open to poly.

After a few weeks of this buildup, we had our first "date" over Discord video and all partners involved were nothing but supportive. It's long distance but the opportunity to visit each other is very real. The opportunity for sex is very real and very much discussed. The possibility of group sex in many configurations is on the table.

And through all this, we've firmly established our commitments and love to our spouses first and foremost, while still talking every day and very much falling in love with each other more and more.

I know all the important parts of navigating a poly relationship, and with how open all communication has been across all parties involved, I'd say we're doing okay.

I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed with how much I feel the euphoria of new love. Falling in love wasn't something I ever expected to happen to me again. I honesty didn't think I was capable of it. This wasn't me choosing someone, I had not say in the matter. My heart just said "this one" and took the rest of me along for the ride.

I don't know if what I need is advice but this is such an "out there" situation for me. Outside of the 4 of us, there's no one to talk to about what's going on. Partially because none of our close friends/family are poly and wouldn't really understand the dynamics, especially when they've gone through problems of cheating. And we also can't let it get out that a streamer fell in love with a viewer, for reasons I hope are obvious.

So this is my anonymous confession. Any whatever words you have for me, I'll take them.

This is so exciting! I'm so happy you're getting this opportunity with so much support from your respective partners behind you! It absolutely makes sense to be overwhelmed and probably pretty nervous about meeting in person for the first time, but just enjoy the moment as much as you can. Falling in love, especially for the second time, is intimidating, and comes with complicated feelings, but it's also so much fun. I hope things go well for you all and that you'll keep me updated on how things go! We all struggle a bit with lack of community to share these things with I think, so I adore being the void to shout into. <3

#polyam asks #polycule #polyamorous #polyamory

[bearseungmin]

Hello ✨ I just wanted to let you know that I really appreciate everything that you do for stayblr (like the birthdaybash event for example) and you’re honestly doing gods work here!! It really warmed my heart to be included on the list and it’s really sweet of you to promote so many writers like this 💕

Just wanted to let you know that me (and probably many other people) really appreciate it 🥺💝 tysm and have a nice day / night 💜

aaa i just want to make everyone feel included in things! it's super rewarding (and funny) to get responses (which i always get overwhelmed by and become unable to respond to everyone lmao I'm sorry) of everyone being excited and also surprised they're even in a event recs list because they don't think they're good enough (even though they're just as cool and amazing writers as the rest of us) !!!

i just think it's super important to support everyone i can on here because it's way too easy for us to fall under the radar especially since the algorithm/search tags often fail us.

also I'm constantly raving about everyone's masterlists (no matter how they look) because i think it's incredibly unique how we all organize our titles and descriptions and add on extra info but also are creating themes at the same time. as someone who dabbles in cc often it feeds my creative brain!

but omg thank you so much for sending me this love it made my entire day <3 !!!

#bearseungmin.txt #long ass response whoops #no but really i love the community here and how we're as supportive as we can be as writers #we try to keep everyone safe and comfortable while also being allowed to be creative selfs #insanity #also if the search tags keep being as mean to everyone as they have been (shadow banning) #i might try to talk to clove about making a writing stayblr discord community so we stop missing out on things! #but it's still in discussion #crispy-chan #love you're the kindest sort of person thank you for taking time to write this to me seriously i appreciate it sm

[trans-axolotl]

idk i think a lot of people sort of build up schizo-spec diagnoses in their head as this example of a "clearly biomedical disease that is the scariest possible example of mental illness that is always a crisis no matter what." and i'm not going to sit here and say that schizoaffective is always pleasant to live with, or pretend that it's something that I can manage perfectly-it does cause me distress a lot of the time, and makes some things very difficult. but for me, psychosis is by far not the most difficult symptom i have to deal with, compared to some of the other things that have brought me distress. And yet it's always the symptom that is reacted to with the most fear, confusion, and disgust by other people. I hate it when people generalize psychosis as always and inherently and forever a crisis, and ignore the fact that everyone who experiences psychosis is going to have their own experiences, perspectives on how it impacts them, and that treating psychosis as a super scary, inherently dangerous symptom is incredibly stigmatizing and prevents us from receiving support and care from our communities.

idk. i just really wish people would realize that for some people, psychosis can sometimes be a neutral or even positive experience (i've had some incredibly lovely psychosis experiences), and that by positioning psychosis as a "super scary disease that has no quality of life" and only offering carceral solutions, it perpetuates a pattern where we get continually pushed into harmful treatments. Instead of a situation where our autonomy is respected, where we're offered a wide variety of treatments from meds to therapies to peer support like Hearing Voices Network to material community based support and where we're allowed to define our own experience of psychosis based on how it actually affects us. like, i don't want to deny that psychosis is often distressing for many of us--but I do think we have the responsibility to evaluate where we've learned about psychosis, what societal messages we've internalized about psychosis, what kinds of knowledge about psychosis do we not have access to, and just actually think in depth about how our biases impact how we communicate about psychosis.

#personal #psychosis #schizo spec #psych abolition #mad liberation #antipsych

[fatterigrow]

2023 - In Review

For me, 2023 was an interesting year full of challenges and surprises. And whilst I've certainly not gained much (if anything) I've had a much better year. Personally, I took a step back to focus on my own mental and physical health. I feel much better now than I did a year ago and I want to thank all of you for your understanding.

I love this community so much and there is a massive part of it that's so supportive and welcoming. I appreciate every single like, comment, reblog and message I've received over my time here, not just this year but every year.

However, there is another side that really needs to take a long look in the mirror and think about how they act. We're all here sharing in what is already a conventionally taboo/obscure kink & livelihood. Why do we have to make it harder for one another? Let's try and work on that in the coming year. Be kinder to content creators and public figures. Be respectful of boundaries. Be more understanding and supportive even if they don't return a message, dont answer an ask or do something you don't like. This should be a safe space for anybody and everybody so let's all try and improve on that in the coming year.

Anyway, here's a little comparison with the same jumper as a thank you for reading through my blabbering.

#fatterigrow #obese #bhm #fat gainer #weight gain #ssbhm #fat belly #belly

[imagineityourself]

So, as you may already know, Russian Supreme court has banned 'international LGBT movement' as an 'extremist organisation'. I rarely post something, but let me share some news and tell you how the situation feels to me, a bisexual 22yo living in Russia.

Now, according to law, you will face up to 12 years of imprisonment if you somehow show that you're gay or support gay rights - even if you're wearing a 6-colour rainbow pin on your T-shirt. Even if you're holding hands.

Yesterday a TV channel in Saint's Petersburg was fined for showing a music video for a song by Sergey Lazarev (you may remember him as a Eurovision participant in 2016 and 2019) where two girls are showing affection. In the official statement, the vid was described as containing 'fragments showing interacting hands (caressing each other) belonging to two different people of the same sex, i.e. potentially perceived as a tactile, sensual interaction of individuals broadcasting their homosexual preferences'.

Here's the link to what is considered containing extremism in Russia btw.

I have a girlfriend, we've been together for 2 years now. We used to hold hands when outside sometimes - not in super public places, but you know, quiet spots in a park where you are unlikely to meet anyone. Physical touch is one of my main love languages, and having my gf touch my shoulder to reassure me or take my hand to show affection means so much to me. My heart actually skips a beat when she does that.

Yesterday, we were taking a stroll in a park. She took my hand, and after a few seconds with a corner of my eye I noticed a man passing by watching us with a weird look. And my heart skipped a beat for another reason.

'He's gonna report to the police!!!' - it screamed. 'We're fucked!!!' - it screamed even louder. I let go my girlfriend's hand. We looked at each other, having the same thought.

It was scary.

We decided never to hold hands when outside again.

We are planning to move in this January. And it is so scary that people might notice. That there might be a neighbour that would rat you out. That you might forget changing pronouns from 'her' to 'he' while mentioning your partner - and spend years in jail.

Yesterday, there were raids of special police units on LGBTQ+ night clubs (that are not saying openly what they actually are ofc) under the pretense of 'illegal drug sale'. People were not let out without taking a photo of their passports.

Two of my queer friends were supposed to go there and ended up not going only because one of them didn't feel well. He was so lucky not to feel well.

Some might say that we should know better than to hold hands in parks and go to undercover gay clubs knowing we're living in Russia - that we could live without this provocation. That is not entirely false.

But the thing is, even two years ago, when I started dating my girlfriend and before the war in Ukraine, no one seemed to really care. I can't speak for the entire LGBTQ+ community, but I'd say if we were living quietly our undercover gay life, we were more ignored than actually oppressed. Even when the 'LGBT propaganda law' was passed, at least you could get away with a fine for showing a rainbow. Now you don't. We won't hold hands or go to gay parties, you win.

And that's scary.

I would love to know how to fight, but I'm just so tired.

#russia #lgbt #lgbt rights #gay rights #gay #bisexual #Youtube #lgbtqia

[butch-reidentified]

as you can see, reblogs and replies are now turned off for this mind-numbingly braindead post, but I couldn't resist sharing some of the batshit content in the notes.

typing in color so it's easier to tell my commentary apart from the screenshots

radfems are insane because... we think "all women matter" doesn't include males. incredible insight. I also love "leave my sisters alone. and leave me and my brothers alone, fuckers," as if that's the direction the harassment is typically occuring in. as if radfems are hunting trans people for sport simply by not believing in or supporting the gender construct. yes. we are clearly the insane party here.

more evidence we're the insane ones, as this person claims men aren't an oppressor class and that somehow believing that they are will lead to... believing butch lesbians are an oppressor 💀 this is your brain on gender - completely unable to even consider sex, only "masc presentation," which is how they come to the batshit conclusion that acknowledging men are an oppressor class will ultimately come to include butch lesbians.

... girl. what.

however........ there's one reblog that really stands above all others. It is so long and so unhinged that it surpasses tumblr's image cap, so I'm going to have to do a part 2 of this post. but here's a sneak peek:

Gender worshippers learn what gender essentialism & bioessentialism actually mean challenge: impossible

Seriously. Y'all loooove redefining shit so much, but these terms were created for specific reasons and you can't just rewrite any word or term you want to suit your beliefs. Gender essentialism refers to the commonly held belief that gendered traits are biologically determined by sex rather than learned. The idea that women are "naturally" or "biologically" homemakers, more nurturing, less confrontational, and more emotional, that little girls "naturally" or "biologically" prefer dolls over toy trucks, that women "naturally" or "biologically" feel driven to have babies and there's no such thing as a happy childfree woman, that sex is inherently more emotional and meaningful for women, that men are more logical, better at STEM subjects, better drivers, that it's "natural" for men to cheat but not for women to, that men are "naturally" or "biologically" more aggressive, that paintball and Call of Duty are naturally "for boys," and a thousand other ridiculous things way too many people believe.

But oh shit, what's that? The people who really started fighting back against gender essentialism and arguing that gender is a social construct were... second wave feminists???!!! the very movement radical feminism is born from and shares most of its tenets with???!!! it's... it's almost like... radfems are the literal opposite of essentialists 😱

Meanwhile, today's trans community will tell gender-nonconforming people they're "eggs" and "totally going to come out as trans any day now" while simultaneously claiming not to define gender by stereotypes 🤡 like, OK...

check notes for Part 2!

#mine #tra reciepts #peak trans #trans activism #gender identity #gender ideology #radblr #radical feminism #misinformation #gender essentialism #bioessentialism

[boredom-reigns]

You know, as frustrating as aro discourse existing in 2024 is, it's kinda made me think of stuff.

Primarily, how seeing some non-aspec people's responses to aromanticism really highlight how some just don't understand or don't try to understand what the aromantic experience is like.

It's easy to brush off aromantics. It's easy for them to say "oh but you're straight-passing anyway" and then say that there's no reason for aromantics to cling to the lgbtq+ community—to cling to any community at all.

But you know? I feel like what a lot of non-aspecs don't get is just how fucking alienating being aspec is.

Hell, before I even identified as aromantic, I just felt so disconnected from society because I couldn't fall in love. I remember just feeling something was so wrong about me because everyone was talking about falling in love and having crushes and the media everywhere says you need to find The One and get married and that romance is a requirement for a happily ever after. And it’s not like I didn't know gay people existed! I knew! Because I tried to check if I was gay or bi or pan—I tried so hard to get attracted to people, and I just never did.

There's just that specific feeling of loneliness... wondering if somehow you were broken in some way. And that fear of thinking you'll never be happy because society promotes the idea that romance is True Love. That it is the best relationship you can have in your life. That you will never get a happy ending and that you will die alone.

Discovering that aromanticism is a thing made me feel normal. It told me I'm not broken—that other people like me existed. And that's why the community is important to me. Because the feeling of thinking something is wrong with you is something I don't want others to feel. The more people know and discuss aromanticism, the less people have to experience the negative emotions that I and other aromantics felt.

And aromanticism just doesn't feel alienating in the cishetallo society. It's can be so fucking isolating being in the lgbtq+ community too. Th

Because this is a place that's supposed to accept anybody who diverges from the societal norm of cishetallo. But no, we're either rejected, excluded, or treated invisible. People don't bother to listen to aspec experiences. People would say they support aspec people but then turn around and spout aphobic rhetoric.

So then this ngl, it's honestly kinda predictable that this discourse pops up and people go "oh aspec people are queer but—" NO BUTS! Aspec people are queer. Cishetaro and cishetaces are queer. No ifs and buts.

Why is the aspec identity inherently considered less priority than the cishet identity? Aspec isn't some secondary label—it's a part of who we are. An aromantic heterosexual still diverges from the norm. They have experiences that heteroromantic heterosexuals would never understand. They are still hit with amatonormativity and heteronormativity.

And at that point, yeah, I get it. Those arophobes probably think it's easy to ignore being aromantic in day-to-day life. I've seen people assume we just put on the label, then don't have society tell us we're wrong for being who we are. That we don't need a community.

To that, I say: listen to aromantic people. Listen to their experiences. Try to understand what it's like to live in our shoes.

But also—queerness isn't about oppression. The lgbtq+ community exists so people who aren't part of the "normal" in regards to gender and sexuality can find a safe space. So that people wouldn't feel alone and broken and realize that there's more people like them than they think. So that we can break these societal norms that just harm all of us.

Basically, my god, shut up. We're queer, we're here, and we're aromantic.

#aromantic #aromanticism #aro #lgbtq+ #lgbtqia #lol this got rambly and all over the place but yeah

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for indulging in my boyfriend's cuck kink?

Alright, so for some background, both me (25, M, panromantic asexual) and my BF (28, M, bisexual) live in a VERY conservative rural area, literally NOBODY knows we're together even though we've been dating for years and the community is pretty tight-knit, that's how much effort we've put into hiding ourselves. We've thought about moving out but honestly other than the constant threat of being found out our life here is pretty great, we know everyone in the community and are on very friendly terms with them, we were both born and raised here so we're honestly kinda scared of losing everything and starting over in a new place, plus I really want to stay to support my dad because I know he can already get pretty lonely as is (mom works out of town, only visits for holidays if even that, plus I don't have any other siblings to keep him company) and me moving away would hurt him a lot.

Now, with that out of the way onto the actual situation: the cuck thing is something me and my boyfriend have discussed about at length, he's not shy about it to me and I'm always glad to make him happy so I'd be open to trying it if the opportunity arose. The thing is- I never really thought there WOULD be an opportunity for it due to the circumstances described above. Well, that was until a girl we both know confessed to me on Christmas Eve. That girl- let's call her Ellie (23, F, straight(?))- is someone I've actually had feelings for a while now (my BF knows and told me he'd be fine with me dating her as an 'official' relationship, but only if I keep us a secret), however I never did anything about those feelings. I was honestly kinda shocked when the confession happened, but in a good way, and I ended up accepting in the heat of the moment, so now me and Ellie have been 'officially' dating for about a month.

Here's where I think I might be the asshole: since that happened my BF has started to hang out with the two of us while we're acting like a very lovey-dovey couple and he's obviously been getting off on that (as in, it's obvious to me, doubt anyone else picked up on it) and I've been having mixed feelings about this. On one hand we did talk about it and agree to it, but on the other I do think this is unfair to Ellie in a way that I didn't realize previously because I never realistically considered this happening. My BF is reassuring me, saying that it's best we keep hidden anyway and that so long as nobody finds out no harm is done, but I still feel kinda bad about it, yet at the same time I don't really know what I should do in this situation to make it right. The whole thing only gets even more complicated when you account for the fact that Ellie is our pastor's granddaughter and as such comes from a very well known family in our community, a family that has a reputation to uphold, and if the thing about me and my BF came out it would surely impact her badly in that way as well. On the other, she really gets along with my son (8, M) and I really think that she'd make a great mother to him so I don't want to deprive him of that and break things off just because of my own personal drama. On the other OTHER hand I also don't want to break up with my BF because it would feel cruel in my opinion, especially when I very much still love him.

So, AITA for keeping my promise and just going along with this and keeping quiet to save myself and my BF?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[gaypiratepropaganda]

Izzy's apology in the finale seems to have taken some people by surprise. During the break between seasons, I tried a few times to politely bring up the fact that Izzy was technically abusing Ed. Not because I wanted anyone to stop liking him (you can like a character who's doing abuse! it's not real. who cares), but because I was worried about the reaction when season two came out. I love this show very much and I know how tumblr can get. Most importantly, I love fucked up fictional relationships and cannot abide people making these two boring. So here we go. (I also love lists)

First. Emotional abuse can occur in intimate relationships, family relationships like father and son, or in the workplace (Ed/Izzy triple threat!). Second, it has to be an ongoing thing. Someone doing one of these things once is not abuse. Abuse is a pattern of cruel and frightening behavior in order to control the victim.

(Don't feel bad if you didn't notice this stuff! It's relatively subtle and we're kind of trained to ignore and forgive it, especially from characters like Izzy. I wasn't 100% sure I was right about this either until season two confirmed it. I think a lot of people don't even know what emotional abuse is, at least where I live.)

Below are some pretty solid warning signs (this said "criteria" before but I changed it to be more accurate) for emotional abuse, followed by examples:

•Monitoring and controlling a person’s behavior, such as who they spend time with or how they spend money.

One of Izzy's main motivations in season one was trying to force Ed to act more like his image of Blackbeard. To achieve that, he bullied, belittled, and threatened Ed. He attempted to kill Stede because Ed was spending too much time with him and he felt that Stede was a bad influence.

• Threats to a person’s safety, property, or loved ones

He tried to kill Stede (Ed's loved one) or get him killed several times. Once trying to get Ed to do it himself with the doggy heaven situation, once directly with the duel, and once by calling in the navy.

He didn't directly threaten Ed's safety until episode ten, but he did seem to have Ed convinced that the crew would kill him if Izzy wasn't there to protect him and then when Ed did things he didn't like, Izzy threatened to leave. It's indirect, but has the same result: Ed felt he was unsafe unless he did what Izzy wanted.

• Isolating a person from family, friends, and acquaintances

Izzy seemed to keep Ed isolated from the crew, act as a go-between, and control their perceptions of each other to a certain extent. In the first few episodes, Ed was always shown alone in his goth cabin with Izzy as his only contact. When he started to make new friends Izzy tried to make him kill them.

After Izzy was banished, he secretly sent Ed's ex in to manipulate him and get him away from his new community. Then he got them all arrested, culminating in the deal he made with the English that would have made Ed his prisoner. Not sure that was on purpose, but it was so fucked up I had to mention it.

The bit that really got me, for some reason, was when Frenchie asked after Ed and Izzy told the crew he was sick.

• Demeaning, shaming, or humiliating a person

Izzy is often shown berating Ed and yelling at him. The way Ed reacts suggests to me that he may be used to this kind of treatment from people in general, or from Izzy in particular. He never leaves or asks him to stop, he just takes it.

• Extreme jealousy, accusations, and paranoia

He was so jealous of Ed's relationship with Stede that he got the literal military involved. His explanation to for why Ed enjoys spending time with Stede was that he has "done something to [Ed's] brain." Like, what magic powers do you think he has, Izzy?

• Making acceptance or care conditional on a person’s choices

Izzy made it very clear that he would only support Ed if he conformed to the Blackbeard persona. He also seemed to have Ed convinced that there was no way he could survive without Izzy's support.

I just realized that if you subscribe to the headcanon that Izzy acts as a sort of caretaker to Ed (I do not) then all of this is way more fucked up.

• Constant criticism, ridicule, or teasing.

In season one he criticized everything Ed did, all his plans, even while telling him to come up with more plans. He ridiculed Ed and called him names pretty often: "twat, namby-pamby, insane." Even in season two when he's doing better, most of their interactions consist of Izzy teasing and making fun of Ed for being mopey or in love.

• Refusing to allow a person to spend time alone

I didn't think of this until now, but Izzy is often around when Ed thinks he's alone. He knows about things that happen in scenes he isn't in. Izzy's always sort of lurking, though? And he does it to everyone. So I'm not sure if we should count this one.

• Thwarting a person’s professional or personal goals

He's ok about piracy related goals, but as soon as Ed tried to do something other than that he got so weird about it. "This crew is so talented, why are we even being pirates?" is what got Izzy to threaten Ed. Which is interesting because he was fine with the retirement idea before, when he thought he'd get to be captain.

• Instilling feelings of self-doubt and worthlessness 

"insane unpleasant shell of a man merely posing as blackbeard." "I should have let the English kill you. This... whatever it is you've become is a fate worse than death."

• Gaslighting: making a person question their competence and even their basic perceptual experiences.

He called Ed insane and implied that the crew would mutiny if he wasn't there to stop them. This is clearly untrue, as we were already shown that his method of "massaging the crew" consisted of calling Ed half insane and pulling Fang's beard even though Fang hates that. The fact that he calls Ed insane more than once while at the same time trying to get him to act more insane seems like basic gaslighting to me. Then again, Izzy's definition of "insanity" may be like, depression, crying, showing emotions, loneliness, and enjoying softness.

[can't find a gif of this so just imagine Ed in the gravy basket with Hornigold saying "you're worried you're insane."]

Something that wasn't on this specific list but is generally considered part of emotional abuse is manipulation: the use of indirect tactics to change someone's thoughts, feelings, or behaviors in an attempt to influence them for personal gain.

I think Izzy often tries to be manipulative. He's not the greatest at it, but it's the thought that counts. He manages to be surprisingly successful through persistence and repetition.

He's got Ed convinced from the first time we see them that he is useless as a captain without Izzy. That's why Ed feels like he needs him. He tells him that the only thing standing between Ed and a crew constantly on the brink of mutiny is Izzy. Then he tells him that he will leave if he can't live up to his expectations.

He has a pattern of lying to Ed or not telling him the whole truth. He threatens him directly and indirectly in an attempt to influence him and control his behavior. He wants power, whether he gets it by becoming a captain when Ed retires or by making sure Ed remains powerful by any means necessary.

this is what he was apologizing for, along with the years of being terrible to Ed before Stede came into the picture. I never expected him to admit it so clearly like that. He fed Ed's "darkness," poked at his trauma for so long because he needed Blackbeard. It was something they did together, and he enjoyed Blackbeard's dominance and cruelty.

Of course there are other things that can be part of this kind of abuse, like infantilization, silence, and harassment. There are more examples of abusive behavior from Izzy at the start of season two, especially in the scene where Ed's asking Izzy to kill him. but I am not ready to get into that right now.

Anyway, Ed and Izzy's storylines in season two only make sense to me with this in mind. Ed is recovering from not only the suicide attempts but also this fucked up situation he was in, whether he realizes it or not. Izzy learns to stop being such a shitboy and admits he was wrong. ~growth~

if you interpret their relationship differently that's obviously fine. but I think this is the most interesting interpretation, as well as what was intended. It's no fun for me when people make them both equally awful to each other. I like it better as it is in the show: Ed fighting back against Izzy's emotional abuse with physical violence, which only ends up traumatizing him further. It's such a unique and fascinating story.

#our flag means death #Ed Teach #izzy hands #ed/izzy #blackbeard #ed/stede #tw abuse #abuse cw #@piratecaptainscaptainpirates #I should have posted this a long time ago but #I was kind of afraid you guys would kill me lmao #I think we're good now #we can talk about this #if you think of anything else I'll add it #one more thing I didn't know how to fit in here #is the way Izzy really wants Ed to be violent #to other people but also to him #when Ed doesn't want to do that #and is specifically triggered by being violent #also the first thing that really made me go #hey wait a minute #about Izzy was when he apologized to Ed for calling him a 'shell of a man' while he was 'leaving' #Ed said 'no. you were right. about all of it.' #and then Izzy immediately went back to being a dick to him two episodes later #reminds me so much of what one of my friends went through #wow this is so long

[lovelyiida]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐬.

KATSUKI BAKUGO X SECRETARY READER

A 500 FOLLOWERS SERIES!

❥ SYNOPSIS: as the years went by, bakugo realized that he was the last to get married. the days grew cold and the nights turned lonely. bakugo wants to marry, but he doesn't really feel like falling in love. at least he has his trustee secretary!

❥: CHAPTERS

❥ WARNINGS: implied fem reader, aged-up! Pro-hero MHA characters over the age of 27, vulgar language, suggestive wording and content

❥ MASTERLIST

❥ JOIN TAG LIST!

WORDS: 4.8K

CHAPTER 6: PASS THE SALT

“You know what they say about secretaries..."

"A what?"

The revelation hit like an unfathomable wave, leaving Katsuki in utter shock and embarrassment. His words slipped out uncontrollably, and he hung his head low, attempting to collect himself before facing his parents' reactions.

With just a grunt escaping him, the blonde struggled to conjure up a somewhat plausible response. "Just… don't freak out. I've been meaning to say this for a while now, just couldn't find the time."

Deep into his face, palms buried, he rubbed his eyes, attempting to shake himself from the grave he had unwittingly dug.

"How long have you guys been dating? I mean, we're happy, right?" Bakugo's father sought assurance from his wife, but all he received was a long stare.

"Um, I've known her for a while, I guess—"

"Ya' guess? What's that supposed to mean?" Mitsuki interjected, a little disheveled from the news, trying her hardest to take things step by step.

"Please, let him speak," his father interjected.

Another loud pause set into motion, catching Katsuki off guard as he had not anticipated bringing up the topic of you that day. "We were talking, then we started to hang out, started to go out, and the rest was history—"

"What happened to not having time to do anything, since you're, y'know… putting our safety first?" Mitsuki quipped at the hero.

"I can still go out and find love; I'm not some sad and lonely prick!" Katsuki yelled. "If it makes you feel any better, she's my secretary. Still ass-deep in my work."

Katsuki's response earned a scoff from his mother. "I just don't understand why you couldn't tell us about this, of all things. These matters are very important. You didn't even ask for our blessing, Katsuki," she said.

He could tell by the tone of her voice that she was hurt, almost feeling a sense of betrayal. One of the most important moments of her son's life has passed and she wasn't a part of it.

"I want to meet her," she says, Katsuki's breath hitches.

Katsuki swallowed hard, the weight of the situation sinking in. He lifted his head, meeting his mother's gaze, and nodded hesitantly.

"Yeah, uh. I'll bring her over sometime soon. You can meet her, ask whatever the hell you want," he mumbled, trying to keep the conversation under control.

Mitsuki folded her arms, a mix of concern and curiosity etched across her face. "You better not be hiding anything else, Katsuki. We're your parents; we deserve to know what's going on in your life."

Bakugo's father, still trying to process the information, chimed in with a more composed tone. "Son, we just want to understand and be a part of your life. If you're serious about her, then we should support you. But communication is key. You can't just shut us out."

Katsuki sighed, "Yeah, I get it. I messed up, I'll tell her you wanna talk"

His mother's expression softened slightly, though traces of concern lingered. "Good. We're not here to judge; we just want what's best for you."

The tension in the room began to ease as the family started to navigate this unexpected revelation. As the married couple soon go their separate ways, Katsuki storms out of the house. Heading to his car, he jumps in with force.

"Fuck, what the actual fuck is wrong with you?" Looking out towards the distance he lays back into the seat with a drafted sigh. The blonde thinks hard about the decision he's made. He didn't want to rope you into the situation though he didn't have a choice. The old bats wouldn't get off his case (Katsuki self-sabotages quite often).

How the hell is he gonna break this down to you?

"He went to see his mom and dad?" you asked, your curiosity piqued.

The redhead nods nervously, his hand reaching over to fiddle with the closest plant in range. The room falls into an awkward silence, and you find yourself shrugging in response. "Okay? I just don't understand why he couldn't tell me that..."

A thought crosses your mind, "It would've saved me a lot of trouble," you muse to yourself.

"It was so sudden, Ms. L/n, we had no idea—" Riot's explanation gets cut short by the sudden buzz of his phone. With a jolt, he quickly grabs it and stares at the screen. His eyes scan the messages with vigor as he quietly reads the words to himself. You can't help but be curious, "Is that Dynamight?" you ask.

The redhead's eyes shoot up to you for a split second, and then he continues reading. With a quick sigh, he places his phone down and puts his hand up against his temples, squeezing with firm resolve. "Uh... yeah, that was him."

Concern flickers in your eyes as you press further, "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah! everything's fine; it's just Monday, y'know?" he says with an offputting chuckle. Your eyes narrow at him for a split second before scanning the room to check the clock.

"Well, thank you for your kindness, Mr. Riot, but I should get going. I have a meeting with my queen-sized bed." You chuckle, attempting to lighten the mood. Giving the office cat one more affectionate pet, you rise out of your seat with ease and turn towards the door.

"Wait!"

Red Riot's voice booms through the room, causing you (and the cat) to jolt in surprise. "Dynamight's on his way; he really needs to see you," he says quickly. As you blink to process the information he just shared, you can't help but let out a defeated sigh. "So close," you whisper to yourself. Releasing the doorknob, you turn around, putting on your best business-coded smile.

"Sure, just tell him I'll be in his office." Turning back around, you head out the door and walk through the proclaimed hero's office. It's striking to see how night and day the two offices are. The aesthetics shift from sleek and black to relaxed and colorful.

Even the attitudes of the workers differ; they actually seem like they want (or at least don't mind) to do their job. The atmosphere is palpably different, and you find yourself absorbing the contrasting energies as you navigate through the hero's domain.

As you traverse back to the boss's office, you smoothly enter his main office, somewhat savoring the familiar ambiance as you feel a little bittersweet about being back at the office. You begin to unpack your things and get straight into work.

One hour passes, the minutes ticking away in a rhythmic dance.

Two hours pass, each moment blending into the next, creating a seamless continuum.

Three hours pass; you tiredly watch the passage of time marked by the silent ticking of the clock on the wall. A rather substantial chunk of time has passed since Red Riot mentioned that Dynamight was on his way. And you're mad as hell.

You completed everything you needed to an hour ago and decided to sit and wait just for good measure.

But now, impatience gnaws at you. Huffing, you quickly gather your things and head out of the office. Taking the elevator down to the parking garage, you aimlessly walk towards the chauffeur, the air heavy with anticipation as you slip into the sleek vehicle.

You know you're not exactly allowed to use the chauffeur, but fatigue has settled into your bones, and you simply don't feel like dealing with the hassle of taking a cab back home. As the chauffeur skillfully maneuvers through the city's nocturnal labyrinth, you find solace in the gentle hum of the engine.

Finally dropped off at your apartment, you collapse into the welcoming embrace of your bed.

Another couple of hours have passed since you left work. Glancing at the clock, a sense of worry creeps in as 10 pm emerges. "Must've been a serious conversation," you ponder. Out of habit, you pull out your phone and mindlessly text your boss.

TO: Dynamight (BOSS)

Riot told me where you were.

Next time… just tell me not to come in.

Placing the phone down, you continue watching mind-numbing daytime TV reruns. "I wonder if he thinks I'm some joke," you say aloud. Anger quietly simmers in your stomach as you shift your feet around, attempting to find comfort in the folds of your bed.

Not even five minutes later, Dynamight answers your text.

Picking up your phone, your eyes widen at his text.

FROM: Dynamight (BOSS)

outside

we need to talk.

Oh, this is serious…

Jolting out of your bed, a rush of adrenaline propels you to the window, where you cautiously peek outside. There he is, waiting at your door. Surprisingly, he looks a tad bit nervous, perhaps uneasy?

Shutting your blinds, you slip on your house shoes and stomp towards the door. Opening it with a swift motion, you look at the hero. He meets your gaze, appearing tired and somewhat defeated as you begin to let loose on him.

"You need to be more considerate of people's time and what they're going through! Do you even know what I went through today? Well, I ended up in your buddy's office today, okay—"

"Please, L/n… just let me in," the blonde's voice rasps at you. Blinking, you notice how unfazed he looks as you stop your scolding. Quietly cursing under your breath, you hold the door open for him to come in.

As the blonde enters your place, he takes off his shoes and sits at the dining room table. Your boss's demeanor today is unusual compared to how you've seen him before. He looks almost vulnerable to you.

"You want anything to drink?" you say quietly. The blonde rolls his neck and then looks you in the eyes. "Got beer?" he says. You quietly nod and go into the kitchen to get him a beer.

"Get yourself one too; you're gonna need it," he says, the last part just below a whisper. You hum in agreement and grab the beers. Sliding one to him, he grabs it and cracks it open with vigor.

You watch as your boss quickly gulps down the contents, as you only take a small swig. Placing your drink down you look at him concerned.

"What did you need to talk about?" you say softly.

"Um… listen," you watch as the blonde shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He lets out a deep sigh, placing his hands into his pockets, and his head hangs low.

"So, I talked to my parents today—"

"I know that—"

"I was talkin' to them, you know… how parents are. They get on your ass when they need to, and they were definitely on mine. My mom said some things, and I got upset. I started to blabber a whole bunch of shit for no reason—"

"I'm having a hard time figuring out what the issue is. So you're being held accountable?" you say, confused. You watch as he clenches his fist and closes his eyes, trying his absolute hardest not to explode in anger right then and there.

"As… I began to ramble, I brought you up, and I told my parents that you're my girlfriend… we're engaged." He says defeatedly, a long pause of silence goes by as you stare at your boss, absolutely dumbfounded.

What?

"WHAT!"

Jumping up from your seat, you start to pace around the kitchen in anger. "I can't even look at you right now— are you serious?" you turn towards him, eyes wide, and lips turned upward in anger.

"C'mon, it's not that serious—"

"Not that serious? Are you messing with me?" you say outraged.

"L/n, please just sit down so we can talk this out—"

"Talk this out? No, I don't wanna say anything to you. God, how could you do this? It's like I'm not even a person to you; like I'm just a toy that you continuously beat against a hardwood table over, and over, and over—"

"L/n!" Dynamight's voice roars over yours, and you flinch at the sound. The rhythmic sound of your breaths huffing is the only sound that penetrates through the air.

"Okay, fine. We can talk, but I'm not sitting down," you say sternly, which makes the blonde roll his eyes. You hear him mumble a quiet "whatever," which almost sets you right back into another frenzy.

Fighting the urge to escalate, you take a deep breath and continue to pace, the tension in the room thick enough to cut with a knife.

"My parents want to meet you tomorrow, is that okay?" he dares to ask. You wanted to say something witty, something that would tick him off, but you started to go into deep thought.

"Give him a taste of how he's treated you, Y/n; the time is now."

Turning to face him, you look at him with no emotion. "Okay, that's fine," you say. This throws your boss off guard, "uh, are you sure? You seemed pretty against it literally three seconds ago—"

"No… I think it's fine. I know we talked about taking things slow, but it's whatever," you say defeatedly. You watch as the blond takes his hands out of his pockets and places a box out and in front of you.

"You'll need this," he says.

Eyes tracing down from his hand and onto the box, your stomach drops to your ass in a heartbeat.

An engagement ring.

"I'm not forcing you to put it on right now, but just have it on before I see you tomorrow," he says. You aimlessly nod, eyes still glued to the ring. You hear your boss stand from his chair with a screech and walk towards you.

"You don't need to memorize my favorite color or whatever the heck—just be present and actually act as if you're interested, please?" he pleads with you. You hum with a silent nod.

"I'll let myself out," the hero mumbles.

After a few moments, you hear the door close and the sound of his car speeding off into the night. The room is left in silence, filled with the weight of unexpected developments and the promise of an imminent meeting with Dynamight's parents.

Sitting back down at the table, you grab the velvet box. Opening it, you can't help but let out a gasp. The ring is absolutely beautiful, looking way too expensive to be just a regular engagement ring. Taking it out of the box, you can't help but marvel at its beauty.

"I always thought later in my life I would be proposed to a little bit differently…" you chuckle to yourself, unable to help feeling a little bittersweet at the moment you're currently experiencing. The unexpected turn of events, coupled with the striking beauty of the ring, creates a whirlwind of conflicting emotions within you.

Sighing, you place your head down on the table, feeling the cold wood press against your skin. Closing your eyes, you didn't know what to think or feel—you were just there.

"What the hell are you wearing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why do you look so… fancy?"

Currently sitting inside your "fiancé's" car, you're being berated once more for no exact reason. "I just thought that since I'm meeting your parents and all that I would dress nice," you say unbothered as you fix up your makeup in the passenger mirror.

"Plus, I bought this a year ago; m'not letting it collect dust."

You hear the blonde let out a drawn-out sigh, before you knew it, you felt a surprisingly soft hand wrap around your wrist. Looking over, you see him stare at the ring on your finger.

Swallowing your spit, you look over at his hand.

No ring.

"And where's your ring?" you say sternly. "It's right here," he mumbles as he reaches into his armrest. "I was gonna put it on but… I didn't know which finger to put the stupid thing on," he says.

You chuckle at his words as you grab the box from his hand and open it. He chose a pretty nice ring for himself also. Taking the ring out of the holder, you grab his hand and slowly slip the ring on.

"There," you speak softly.

"Thanks," the hero mumbles before quickly snatching his hand away from your grasp and placing them on the steering wheel. Quickly driving off.

Looking at the sights, you see the transitions from the bustling, busy city life to a quiet suburban city. You watch as the hero drives around the town, memorizing every turn and every stop.

Sometimes he would tell you a story about him from childhood whenever he would see a certain park or store. It was nice.

But that "nice" feeling in your body soon turned into anxiety as you watch the car turn down a neighborhood road. The neighborhood is nice, beautiful homes with nicely trimmed grass. This is a place you'd see yourself growing up in if your family actually had the money to.

As the car slows to a stop, you park outside the home of your boss's parents. Swallowing your spit, you nervously play with your ring before looking up at the blonde.

"Hey," he says, and you lift your eyebrows in response.

“Call me Katsuki.”

Your eyes widen at the thought of already starting a first-name basis. "Okay, you can call me Y/n," you say. Katsuki nods at your words, "nice name" he mumbles (he's too bashful to be authentically nice).

"Thanks, you have a nice name too," you say.

"Thanks."

A beat passes before you then watch the blonde hop out of the car and walk over to your side. Opening your door, he holds out his hand for you. Looking at his hand for a moment, you press your lips into a line before grabbing it softly.

Interlacing your fingers with the pro-hero, you didn't know what waves of emotions were going through you at the moment. You felt like a high school girl going on her first date.

You notice once more how soft his hands were. Who knew hands that were known to brutally fight against evil and maintain justice and peace in the city were so...soft.

Taking your other hand and placing it on his arm, the both of you walk side by side to the front door. As Katsuki rings the doorbell, you squeeze his hand.

"You'll be fine."

You silently nod before hearing the door unlock. As the door swings open, you're met with a man with brunette hair and glasses who looks exactly like your fiancé. Thus, none other than his father, of course.

"Oh, hello!" he says pleasantly with a soft smile. Unraveling yourself from Katsuki's grasp, you reach out to shake. "Hi, Mr..." your brain paused for a moment.

"Bakugo, Mr. Bakugo, dear," he says with a chuckle. Shaking his hand, he gives you a firm shake before letting you go. You smile as you revert to resting your hands at your center.

"Or you could call me Dad, or Mr. Dad—"

"Please, old man," Katsuki groans. This earns a quiet chuckle out of you.

"Please come in," he says awkwardly, motioning you to follow. As you step into the house, you can't help but quietly speak as you feel the warm touch of Katsuki's hand ghosting around your waist.

As the both of you settle in, you can't help but look at every corner of the house. The modern home was everything you thought it would be. Sleek design yet a homey color palette; you wish this was your childhood home.

Your eyes grazed over framed photographs capturing moments of joy from the pro-hero's childhood. A part of you still didn't believe you were seeing the things you were seeing today.

As you move through the house, Katsuki's father engages in casual conversation, sharing anecdotes and stories about their family. The initial nervousness begins to subside as you find yourself being drawn into the easygoing charm of the Bakugo family.

The living room, adorned with plush furniture and warm hues, invites you to take a seat. Katsuki, still by your side, maintains a protective presence that brings a sense of comfort.

"Dinner will be ready soon. Why don't you make yourselves comfortable?" Mr. Bakugo suggests with a warm smile, leaving you and Katsuki alone for a moment.

The two of you find a spot on the couch, and as you sit together, the air is filled with a mix of anticipation and the gentle hum of family life. Katsuki's hand finds yours again, offering silent reassurance amidst the subtle excitement of the evening.

"He's nice," you mumble softly at Katsuki, which earns a humorous scoff from him. "Yeah, he's too nice, maybe he actually took his meds today," the blonde says. You silently mouth an "oh" before looking around the room some more.

Suddenly, you catch a glimpse of Katsuki's mother in the kitchen, putting the finishing touches on the meal. She also looks just like him; you watch as her eyes match up with yours. Before you could politely bow or smile, her eyes were off of you.

Looking back down into your hands, Katsuki immediately tells that something is off. "Hey, don't mind the old hag; she's just in her feelings." You breathe in, trying to register your emotions and the "old hag" quip.

"Yeah, but I mean, she has every right to act the way she's acting. If I didn't know my son was getting married—let alone had a girlfriend until it's basically time for them to say their vows—I would feel a type of way as well."

Katsuki rolls his eyes as he attempts to place his hand on your thigh. But you turn away from him with a frown. Before the blonde could say anything else, "Mr. Dad" comes walking through.

"Hey, kids, the food is ready," he says with a smile.

You nod before looking back at Katsuki. As the both of you walk towards the dining table, Katsuki pulls out your chair and helps you sit down. As you settle down, you hear a quiet scoff in the distance. Already gathering that scoff was owned by his mother.

Looking down, you stare at the food placed before you. The aroma wafts through the air, and you can't help but smile. "Wow, this looks amazing! I haven't had a home-cooked meal in so long, thank you."

"No need." Looking up, you notice another figure sitting on the opposite side of the table. "Hello, Mrs. Bakugo," you say with a soft bow.

Nothing in return.

Looking over at Katsuki, you could sharpen a dozen kitchen sets with the look he just gave his own mother. The tension in the room becomes palpable, and you find yourself navigating the delicate balance of emotions while trying to enjoy the anticipated family dinner.

As the family gathers around the table, you notice the strained atmosphere between Katsuki and his mother. The unspoken tension hangs in the air, creating an undercurrent that makes you tread carefully with each bite.

You exchange glances with Katsuki, silently acknowledging the situation of family dynamics. Despite the awkwardness, you decide to break the ice by engaging in conversation with Mr. Bakugo.

"So, how did the two of you meet?" he asks. Looking over at Katsuki stuffing his face with rice, you look back over at his father with a bashful smile.

"We met at work; I'm his secretary," you say with a chuckle. Katsuki's dad lets out a chuckle along with you. You also notice that his mother is chuckling too. As she looks into your eyes with a mischievous smile, her eyes glaze over at her husband.

"You know what they say about secretaries…"

"Which is?" you look over at Katsuki, throwing mental daggers at his mother. She swallows her food and chuckles, "I'm just saying! Clearly, you have a type."

"Keep pushin' me; old dirty hag," Katsuki spits venom with every word that comes out of his mouth. Your eyes widen at the vulgarity of the words he chose. Placing your hand above your mouth in shock.

"Or what? Little bastard—"

"Okay!" Mr. Bakugo yells out.

All eyes snap towards him.

"Mitsuki, do you have any other questions for Y/n?" he says anxiously.

A moment of silence passes before she speaks again.

"Where are you from?" she asks.

"I'm from (hometown)," you respond.

"Education?"

"I'm a college graduate in hero analysis and communications."

"How old are you?"

"27, ma'am…28 in (birth month)."

"How many kids are you willing to have with my son?" she suddenly asks. This makes Katsuki and his father choke on their food, sending you aback, and a warmth grows on your cheeks.

"Oh, what? It's not like they haven't had sex before!" she argues.

"Well—"

"Well, what? You're celibate?" She questions; you look over at Katsuki before quietly nodding. "Oh wow, I guess he's really in it for the long haul." Mitsuki sips her drink before going on another brigade of questions for you.

By the end of dinner, things were…okay? You believe you made a good impression on Mr. Bakugo. His mother, on the other hand, was a whole different case.

Soon, you and Katsuki were in the kitchen washing dishes while the older couple sat on the couch to converse. The clinking of dishes serves as a backdrop to the muffled conversation in the living room. The warmth of the water and the shared task provide a brief respite from the earlier intensity.

As you scrub a plate, Katsuki breaks the silence. "Sorry about that, she can be a real pain in the ass."

You look over at him, a small smile playing on your lips. "It's okay, I can handle it. Besides, I'm getting to know your family."

He grumbles in response, his usual tough exterior softening for a moment. The rhythmic sound of washing dishes continues, and you can't help but feel a sense of unity, even in the midst of familial complexities.

"It's not okay; she's never acted like that towards a guest ever, and it's you of all people," he says. You can tell through the tone of his voice that he's genuinely upset. You watch closely as he washes off some scum from a knife with his fingers.

"You didn't deserve that—god, she can be such a bitch—ah, shit!" Katsuki curses as he holds out his finger. He didn't realize, through his fit of anger, that he'd cut his finger.

Your eyes widen at the sight.

"What's going on in there?" You hear Mitsuki yell out.

"K-Katsuki?" You stumble with your words.

"Damn it, sorry," he mumbles.

"I'm fine, there's a first aid kit under the sink."

Quickly grabbing the kit, you come to his aid. Carefully bandaging up his finger. "Katsuki, I promise I've gone through worse. This is only a nib in the bud," you reassure him.

Finishing up the bandage, you place the first aid kit back under the sink. Looking back up at the blonde, you softly smile, placing your hand on his arm before glancing back over.

As you look over, you see Mitsuki staring into your soul, but this time neither of you breaks contact. "Did you guys want to stay for dessert?" Katsuki's father follows up.

The both of you look over at him, and you begin to speak, "Um—"

"Nah, early patrol and an interview tomorrow," Katuski speaks as he sneaks an arm around your waist. "Mm, yeah. That also translates to a lot of paperwork and notes for me," you attempt to make a joke to lighten the air.

This earns a chuckle from the father, "Well, let us lead you out."

As the four of you head towards the door, you watch Katsuki from the corner of your eye get a pat on the back from his father and a thumbs-up, mouthing "I like her" before he slips away from him.

Before leaving, the both of you turn and bow. "It was nice seeing you both for the first time. I hope to come here more often; the food was great."

"Anytime Y/n, the pleasure is ours."

As the both of you turn away hand in hand, you're stopped by a gasp of your wrist. "I'd like to give you a couple of words," says Mitsuki.

"Oh—"

"Whatever you say to her, you can say to me," Katsuki says sternly. His mother rolls her eyes, "Oh, please go to the car; I'm not gonna bite her head off!" She complains.

You give Katsuki an assuring glance before letting him go to the car. Facing his mother, you expect the worst. "Yes?" you say.

She lets out a sigh before she speaks, looking at you with almost a pitiful look. “I don’t know if you’re a good fit for my son yet, but I can tell you care for him. And that’s what matters the most.”

She then places her hand to touch yours, lifts your hand, and observes your ring. "Y'know I was staring at this the whole night? I just can't believe it."

Staring down at the ring, you nod your head in agreement.

"Me either."

I HOPE YOU ALL LIKED IT!! THE FIRST HALF OF THIS BOOK IS COMPLETE! ONLY 6 MORE CHAPTERS LEFT!

— lovelyiida

#mha headcanons #lovelyiida #mha #mha imagines #mha x reader #bnha x reader #bnha headcanons #bnha insert #mha fanfiction #bakugo x reader

[vaspider]

Pete Buttigieg is not the fucking point.

Truly amazed at the people whose big takeaway from that thread is "you hate Pete Buttigieg" like buddy did you not... read... all of it?

I genuinely don't give a shit about Pete himself. If you think this is about Democratic self-devouring or whatever the fuck, please mentally substitute Ellen or George Takei or Rachel Maddow or your favorite Other Respectable Gay. I hear some dude named Rubin is even a conservative who is getting turned on for adopting a baby? I don't know who he is and I don't care (do not tell me, I do not care) but if it makes you feel better, substitute any of those names.

I think the ones that actually make me sad are the people who keep insisting that 70% of people support gay marriage, and that I'm just 'acting out my trauma', and we won't see things turn against us, we're perfectly safe now, how dare I say that cishets won't put themselves out for us when it counts, it's different now.

Honey, 99% of people want tomorrow to go on pretty much like today, and what they'll support when it doesn't cost them anything has nothing to do with what they'll support when it does. Those of us telling you 'we were abandoned before, and we were the ones who took care of us then' aren't telling you because we're incorrigibly bitter misanthropes. I am annoyingly hopeful, actually, and in love with humanity and the beauty of life. Seriously, I have to write poems about it because I love the universe and all of humanity so fucking much. One of the things I love about humanity is its fragility and its uncertainty. I love the ways in which we fail.

And humans, over and over again, turn our eyes away from tragedy.

If you are lucky enough to have cishet friends and family who will put themselves out for you when it really matters, that is fucking fantastic. That's not nearly universal, and I'm afraid that you're going to find out sooner rather than later that it's far less universal for you than you'd like to believe.

At the end of the day, you can believe me or not about all of this. You can say that I'm just a bitter old transfag, an angry old dyke, a traumatized old queer if it lets you sleep better at night, if it allows you to just close your eyes and say 'this is all going to be fine, because 70% of people support marriage equality!' and get some rest. I can't make you pay attention.

And the thing is? I'd love to be wrong. I would absolutely love for every cishet who has ever said "one of them" or said "well, I mean, I just don't want to see it, they can do whatever they want in private" or whatever to turn out to be the raddest fucking ally the world has ever seen. I know it can happen! My in-laws went from being Baptist homophobes to getting weekly chatty update phone calls from the two trans women refugees from Latin America who they housed and helped get their papers sorted and who are now living in New York and call them Mom and Dad. Like, truly, it can fucking happen!

But you can't count on that from the vast majority of people, because when it comes down to it, most people want tomorrow to go on pretty much like today. You're much more likely to be able to count on someone with a dog in the hunt.

More than that, though, the point of that essay -- which, when people miss it, they miss it so hard that it feels deliberate, honestly -- is that all of our bullshit infighting doesn't mean dick. I've been saying that for years, begging people to think inclusively about our community, begging people to stop all the bullshit infighting because I could see this shit fucking coming, you didn't need to be Cassandra to see it coming but sometimes I felt like I was screaming until my throat was horse, the fucking tsunami is coming, it's coming, motherfuckers, can't you see the way the water is pulling back?

And here we are, and all the arguing about whether bi lesbians are "valid" doesn't matter, and everyone's attempt to gatekeep butch and femme doesn't matter, and everyone's arguments about whether neopronouns are bad doesn't fucking matter because we are all just fags, dykes and trannies to them, they do not care for one fucking second about any of this. None of them care for one second about our infighting. No one is going to stop and ask you what your orientation is so they can call you the right slur when they're gaybashing you, kids. They. Don't. Care.

So now here we are, and people are acting like the point of the essay is that I wanted to call one particular dude a fag, rather than that it doesn't matter how perfectly primed you are to fit into Respectable WASP Society, it is your queerness which is objectionable. It is your gayness. It is your transness. It is your bisexuality, your asexuality, your lesbianism. You will never be granted rights and respectability. You have to defend your rights, and stop giving a shit about respectability as a metric of whether or not someone deserves them.

I mean, for fuck's sake, some Iowa voters tried to withdraw their caucus support once they realized that Pete was gay. It literally fucking happened. There's video. Someone they supported above all the other candidates in the Iowa primary was immediately disqualified for them to the point where they tried to retract their support the minute they found out he was gay.

That's the fucking point. I don't care who you use as your Proxy Respectable Gay.

Pete Buttigieg is not the fucking point.

[luveline]

Jade, after the last zombie blurb I can’t stop thinking about like, r taking care of Steve’s knee. Poor boy does so much for everyone else and probably doesn’t think to take care of himself so r just wraps it for him or something. Feel free to use this as a prompt if you’d like, no pressure!!

thank you for the prompt beautiful, I thought it was a great idea!! steve zombie au — you wrap up Steve's injured knee and get ready to move out of your makeshift camp. tw for zombie apocalypse typical violence and gore

There's a misery in the air thick as coal dust. For five days now, you, Steve, and the rest of the survivors from The College have been holed up in an apartment building within the city that surrounds The Michigan–Indiana border. At first, you'd been scared that the raiders who ruined your community would follow the tracks and find you, but a handful of scouts doubled back to find the ruins of your community completely empty. Wrecked, but uninhabited. 

With no one to hide from, a new problem emerges. How are you going to feed this many mouths, support so many children who can't fend for themselves? 

You have to get back on the road. 

So people are packing up. You, amongst the injured, can only sit and watch, though your cuts and bruises get better everyday and this is more of a Steve-mandated bed rest than a necessary sit down. Meanwhile, Steve limps around on his hurting knee and pretends it doesn't hurt at all. You can see him across the room from you now, helping a young girl tie her borrowed shoes tightly. You'll be walking as far as you can tonight, which with little ones won't be very far, but to them will seem like miles and miles and miles. 

"How's that? Not too tight?" he asks, tying her laces.

"It's okay." 

"You need them nice and snug so you don't get blisters, I know it's not comfortable. You're being really brave, Debbie." 

"Is my dad coming home soon?" 

You're terrified for a moment that her dad is one of the people who didn't make it here with you, but luckily Steve must know who she means, and he says, "Any minute now, the river's not far. Do you want to come and sit with me and my girlfriend?" 

She nods to her left, where a book rests face down. "I'm okay. Thank you." 

"You're welcome. We're just over there if you change your mind, okay?" 

He points at you. Debbie and Steve notice you watching them, and you give them a friendly smile and wave. You know you don't look especially inviting. You have marks all over your arms, more on your legs though they're hidden by your pants, and your hair hasn't been taken care of in a week. Your wave falters, even as Steve waves back. 

You pull on the jacket you've been given and pull the hood over your hair before Steve gets back to you.

Steve sits down next to you and sighs.

"Ready to go?" he asks. 

"Yeah." It's not as if you have any possessions to pack. "Are you?" 

"For sure," he says, dropping his face into his hands. "No, god… I'm tired, I don't wanna walk. I wish we could stay here." 

"I know, I'm sorry." 

He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and straightens up. You haven't had a whole lot to talk about with one another lately, but luckily love doesn't need a lot. Your hands meet like magnets and your fingers thread together, his palm rough as yours but pleasantly warm. 

You sit like that for a while. 

"Here, the boon you requested," Robin announces, dropping a little white parcel into your lap. "Did you guys need socks? Sarah said she'd swap me four whole pairs for one of my hoodies." 

Robin being willing to swap one of her hoodies for socks makes you wanna cry. You smile at her. 

"We don't need any socks. You need to stop trading your things away," Steve says. 

"I know you'll find me another one." She looks between you both and bites her lip, hands moving up to her hair. She scratches through it. "Maybe we could stay here tonight, catch up with everyone else tomorrow," she suggests, eyeing you both thoughtfully.

"No," Steve says, kind but firm. "We're ready to go." 

"Okay. Well, I'm gonna go see if Chloe needs a hand with baby Ada," Robin says. She makes a heart with her hand and pushes it down at you. You make one back. 

"She doesn't even like babies," Steve says as she leaves. 

"She's amazing. Okay, take your pants off handsome." 

Steve blinks at you. "Excuse me?" 

You hold the bandage Robin brought you between your index and middle finger. "Time to wrap you up." 

"I'm not cut." 

"I know, but we're gonna be walking, and your knee still hurts. The compression will help." 

Steve knows you're right, even if he isn't eager to be looked after. You shake the blanket over his lap and he slides out of his pants, baring his purpled knee to you unhappily. 

"The bruise is worse," you murmur, unwrapping the bandage from itself in looser circles around your hand. "But it doesn't look swollen anymore. How does it feel?" 

"I was shit scared it was fucked forever, but it was just sprained. It's definitely getting better," he confesses. 

"And if it was fucked?" you ask. He told you it didn't even hurt. "Were you going to pretend forever?" 

"As long as a I could." 

You rub your thumb over his kneecap and wince at his wincing. "Lame… This is gonna hurt, I'm sorry, but not for long." 

"How d'you know it won't make it worse?"

"According to Sarah's copy of Field Medicine for Injury and Disease, it won't. I'm gonna start on top so it doesn't chafe while we walk, and I'm going to pull it really tight, so tell me if it doesn't feel right." 

"Can I ask you something?" Steve says severely. "Who the fuck is Sarah?" 

You wrap his knee. One round of white bandages at a time with a continued pressure, your fingers as gentle as they can be over the stain of his contusion. He doesn't make a sound the whole time, though you know it aches. 

"Did Robin give you her last quarter?" you ask. 

"What, the oxycontin? No, I think she gave it to Jonathan. His burn is scabbing over."

"Then you have nerves of steel." You want to call him my love, or my boy, but you're not often like that, and not in front of so many people. While nobody's watching, you lean down and kiss his knee. You're embarrassed as soon as you've done it but you can't take it back; you sit up and finish tucking in the end. 

Steve takes your face into his hand unexpectedly. 

He might call you honey, or baby, but he's quiet. You miss him so much and he's right here —you don't need The College if he's with you, but you'll miss your bedroom, because there he'd talk for hours about whatever he wanted. You'd give anything to be back there even for a second listening to him re-explain the plot of Fast Times, or try to convince you that cheese didn't even taste that good anyways so don't bother missing it. 

But you're here, and he's gonna be fine. One day he's gonna feel like chatting his nonsense again and you'll be there to listen. Until then, you'll do your best to take care of him.

"Thanks," he says, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. 

He looks so pretty. Brown eyes, the lingering purple and yellow of the shiner he suffered nearly invisible under the dark shadows beneath them. His hair is limp and a tiny bit longer than he prefers to have it, kissing his neck on both sides. He doesn't look clean, and it doesn't matter. 

"You're welcome. Now put your pants back on, Steve. We have places to be soon." 

He squeezes your cheek. "I don't think I can stand up." 

You help him back into his pants, the both of you laughing, and shuffle on your butt so you can sit hip to hip with him, your arm curled behind the small of his back. 

"Put your head on my shoulder, please," you say. 

Steve complies. 

You smile to yourself when he starts to talk quietly, "Hey, did I ever tell you about the time I went to Switzerland? Skiing?" 

"No," you murmur back. "What happened?" 

"I fell on my face. So, I was seventeen, and my mom…" 

—

if you’re reading this, thank you so much! I know some of you are dedicated readers of the zombie au and it warms my heart completely, it makes writing for them so so rewarding and I couldn’t be more grateful <3 if you have any requests for them let me know if you’d like to! but thank you again either way!

#steve zombie!au #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington #steve harrington fic #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington drabble #stranger things x reader #stranger things fic #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things 4

[sleeplesssmoll]

Reverse 1999 Theory: What is "Perception" and how does it work in arcanists? (Ngl I'm very proud of this one. Bare with me and I'll blow your mind! This game is so good!)

Vertin canonically has uncanny perception and a deep understanding for arcanum even amongst arcanists, despite her lack of skill. Arcanists are very sensitive, or rather, vulnerable to emotions. There is another arcanist known for her perception we can look at for more clues.

Mesmer Jr. also has a "acute perception", much like Vertin.

In Reverse 1999, Perception functions like a 6th sense in arcanists. But how does it work? I looked up to see if there is a connection between magnetic fields and emotions. Turns out there is A LOT. Specifically the magnetic field radiated by the heart.

Biomagnetic Communication Between People (source).

We have found there is a direct relationship between the heart-rhythm patterns and the spectral information encoded in the frequency spectra of the magnetic field radiated by the heart. Thus, information about a person’s emotional state is encoded in the heart’s magnetic field and is communicated throughout the body and into the external environment.

There is so much cool information in this article I'd love to gush about, but we're here for lore. Remember my psychube post that I never shut up about? It's actually missing very important information that I didn't add at the time because I could not figure out how it worked.

Polarization:

The different frequencies are triggered by different kinds of emotions and we can see the heart being affected by the electromagnetic fields. My theory is that this is the key to arcanist perception. This is how they "sense" emotions. They are picking up on these frequencies. For a real life example from the same article, look at these graphs showing how the influence of emotions:

Most people tend to think of communication solely in terms of overt signals expressed through facial movements, voice qualities, gestures and body movements. However, evidence now supports the perspective that a subtle yet influential electromagnetic or "energetic" communication system operates just below our conscious level of awareness. The following section will discuss data that suggests this energetic system contributes to the "magnetic" attractions or repulsions that occur between individuals.

Arcanists sense these waves and it can cause distress in them. Mesmer Jr. is a prime example of this. Other people's emotions get to her.

Now how does this tie into our beloved Timekeeper?

What if the reason Vertin has to stay "stoic" is because her emotions can influence the others around her and because she is extra susceptible to other people's incoming emotions. She needs to stay calm even in mental distress. Mesmer Jr. is also like this. She may come off as abrasive and snappy at times but she is described as a "an indifferent and refined machine" (Chapter 3: An Opened Sandwich). These two share a lot in common. They are both victims of trauma yet must operate in many emotionally taxing positions.

They even say "engraved in the heart" (although this could simply be word choice it really fits)!

Both Vertin and Mesmer Jr. struggle everyday to keep the their feelings at bay. Neither of them is "used" to this life but they have to keep up the facade for their sake and possibly for those around them.

The main story doesn't give us as much insight into Vertin's head but the traces do. She is always holding back, just like Mesmer.

Side note, do you remember the heartbeat we heard as Schneider was reversed? It raced. Interesting how later Schneider shows up in one of her dreams during Artificial Somnambulism. This could be an example of HF Polarization which generates strong and temporary mental images with very powerful emotions (assuming the heartbeat was actually Vertin's as she watched Schneider vanish). EDIT: This part is the most speculative as it could Schneider's too and the scene would still make sense. that 'assuming' is doing a lot of heavy lifting here.

This also adds an extra layer to Vertin's interactions with others. She tried to get through to Druvis and Schneider, but as for Forget-me-not and Arcana, she didn't bother. Maybe their feelings of revenge and hatred are so tangible she knew it was lost cause. However, Druvis was laden with grief and loss. She was not a malicious person. Schneider was desperate and motivated by love for her family. Vertin even mentions she knew Madam Z was not part of Constantine's game by the "look in her eyes" and never blamed her for the loss of her friends.

If anything seems wrong or if I missed something, please let me know! I'd be happy if I could refine it further.

#reverse 1999 #vertin #mesmer jr #reverse 1999 lore #character analysis #psychube #i think i got something big here #but its still theory lol #i also learned cool science stuff #reverse 1999 theory

[lizzieisright]

How can you support Palestine? It’s constantly ranked as one of the worst countries for lgbt rights/safety and people who are found out face death in many instances. A man was decapitated in the street for being found gay and gay sexual relations are illegal with a penalty of jail time… Who do you think you are crusading for? The reality is if you went there with a rainbow flag walking down the street you would not be ok. Queer people flee to Israel for safety because society there as in many Islamic regions is notoriously anti-lgbt. Israel bought their land and have every right to defend themselves contrary to what the people wanting to wipe out their entire country believe

Hello!

I support Palestine because every person has a right to live. Because what is happening is a genocide. It's a fact. You can argue about it to the kingdom come, but it's done by the book genocide and, since it's a fact, opinions can't change it.  

With this being said, I'd like to address two specific points you made.

You can't shame me - or anyone who is queer and supports Palestine - by talking about hate crimes against queer people or describing them. Because before that you should look at your own country and check when was the last time a hate crime happened. I bet it'll be recent. Hate crimes and homophobia are not exclusive to arabic/muslim countries. This point of view is narrow minded at best and racist at worst - either by the lack of education or lack of interest in the world.

"The reality is if you went there with a rainbow flag walking down the street you would not be ok." - At this point I thought you might be a troll because saying this to me? I really am the wrong person to come to with this. I live in Russia. It's illegal to wear rainbow flags here and you will go to jail for it. Chechnya has torture camps for gay men. There's police raids in gay bars in Moscow happening regularly. Trans people are in danger of being forced to detransition. I live in the scenario above, you don't need to scare me with it out of supporting Palestine.

But my point is - I support Palestine as a queer even more as just a human, because I know what it means to live like this. Just because Palestinian queers might not be all loud and proud doesn't mean they don't exist; just because being gay is condemned and puts one's life at risk doesn't mean queers just suddenly stop existing.

And I also know - just as I have support here (my closest friends are straight women with traditional beliefs and they are very comfortable with me being gay, most people I know are not violently homophobic) Palestinian queers have their support, their communities and their people who love them and care for them. And they need our support as well. We don't get to turn our back on our fellow queers just because they happen to live in unsafe places. (and again, this kind of belief stinks of racism or of the need to broaden your worldview horizons. Believe me, the majority of queers are not white and don't live in lgbt-friendly countries)

"Israel bought their land and have every right to defend themselves contrary to what the people wanting to wipe out their entire country believe." My point in this is also really affected by me being Russian. (I'm sorry if some of you are uncomfortable with it, I can't really change it.)

You see, these reasons are very similar to what I've heard when Putin tried to justify the attack on Ukraine.

"Israel bought their land" is just as disgusting to me as "Ukraine didn't exist until 1991". "Israel has every right to defend themselves" is Putin's "We're defending ourselves against the collective West". Which is fucking nonsense.

And this is done by the book propaganda - and I'm not saying this because propaganda is a big word people like to throw around. I know this because I studied propaganda for my bachelor degree as a part of "changing public's opinion" course - me and my classmates were trained in this. They take some historical facts you can't deny or make an enemy out of someone (them vs us) and manipulate it to fit their rhetoric. Once you know how to recognise it you'll never not recognise it again.

Israel is not defending itself by targeting civilians and sniping children - they killed more children in these months than Russia in two years which is horrifying to me - they confirmed multiple times they want to erase Palestine from the face of the Earth. These words don't mean self-defence. It's a colonial power that really wants to show how powerful they are and how unstoppable they are. And again, I know this from the side of the colonial power. For me, people who side with Israel are the same people who side with Russia - and it makes me sick. 

Also please don’t assume that people who support Palestine want to destroy Israel, this is again, very narrow minded. Saving people from genocide by committing another genocide? This is plainly stupid. The world is not black and white, it's more complicated than just taking sides. I'll give an example: I'm queer and I know I'll be in danger if I ever come to Dagestan (close to Chechnya) - but dagestan people fund rise to send humanitarian aid to Palestine and I donate to them, because people are dying and I don't really care if people who'll help them are homophobic to me. Because it's not about me.

But there are moments in history when you need to take a stand, and I will not stand with Israel. (or Russia for that matter)

Anyway. Stand with Ukraine. Free Palestine. 

#palestine #free palestine #abby anderson x reader #don't come to me with the same points all zionists have; I've heard way worse said to my face irl #and especially don't weave queer safety into it

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Costume Meta 7x03

so there aren't al l that many costumes to talk about this week from a min cast perspective as pretty much everyone is either in uniform, or a costume they've been wearing for the previous two episodes!

I do have a few things to talk about though so I'm still writing this meta and then I'll be gearing myself up for next week when I have a feeling I'll be up to my eyeballs in new costumes!!

Check theory

The danger around Jared played out - he large bold check signalled that he would be in danger - and he met a grim end!

Pink Theory

I feel like I'm spending every episode playing spot the bright pink and this one came to the pink party as well - we have Corey's dad in this pink sweater and then Corey's two siblings in pink.

Its really interesting to me that we're not seeing this bright pink on any of our mains up to this point (Athena has worn pale pink but not bright pink)- its always been on guest cast (Marisol, Lola, Norman, the mom trapped in the car) and there's a fairly even split between the characters who are in one episode and the multi episode arc characters.

I've already pointed this out but the various traits associated with bright magenta/fuchsia pinks are as follows

Things that are considered positive traits for this shade of pink are; intensity, acceptance, kindness and it's supportive and uplifting nature. It's connected to naive love (as in lust rather than the passionate and enduring love of red) can also be considered a nurturing colour.

Negative traits are; intensity, volatility, arrogant and impatient, irritability and irritating and frustration. it is also said to be a stress inducing colour and is said to be overly emotional and childish.

Stripe Theory

Then we have the stripes - Corey (who I'm convinced is autistic but thats maybe just me projecting!!) is in stripes pretty much the entire time.

The only exception is when the family is on Manzanillo - when he is wearing a watery themed shirt - again separating him from most of the rest of the family - who are all in floral prints (older brother is all in white and not the floral Hawaiian prints but he and his sister (I think they're meant to be twins?!) switch between who is wearing the bold print and who is in a white top throughout the episode)

Mom wears stripes as well - before she gets onto the ship - we see her in this striped coat. Dad and the sister also wear stripes and check scarves, showing that the entire family is in peril, but the largest amount of stripes are saved for the ones who will be in the most danger - which makes total sense from a pattern theory perspective.

An amusing aside that had me giggling - this top is shear perfection when paired with the 118 deciding their new moto is who cares!!😂

Right off to the firehouse to finish up! - I've mentioned before how uniform variation is used to separate out a character where needed (I wrote about it in my 6x09 meta) so here in the firehouse we have two separations going on - Buck and Eddie are the only ones in t-shirts - separating them from everyone else.

In connection to this separating them from the rest of the firehouse crew is that yellow rag Buck is waving around - it feels a little bit like that red one we saw him with several times in season 6 - the season of red flags.

In the same way t hat red cloth was like a red flag, this reads like a yellow flag - now yellow flags are interesting. In shipping terms they were historically a signal of quarantine (this isn' the case any more), and in sports generally they are used to denote hazardous conditions (motor racing and on beaches relating to surf and currents).

But the more interesting yellow flag concept is the yellow flag in a relationship - generally speaking they are indicators of things that could become problematic and turn into red flags if not dealt with or communicated about (yup communication again). Paired with the fact that Buck and Eddie have been 'singled' out through their uniform, its telling us issues ahead (even if we didn't know about them) and that its their dynamic that is going to be tested and that they are going to need to communicate.

Now all those yellow hoses hanging around in the back ground and then one hose physically connecting them - is certainly a choice (remember they could have used one of the non yellow hoses if it wasn't important) and a pretty loud one. I go on and on about yellow lines of communication, a lot, and I have in my metas for this season so far, but here we have another example of yellow ropes.. lines, cables etc.

The really really key thing here is that we haven't actually seen Buck and Eddie connected by a yellow anything since the end of season 3 and having not seen them connected with a yellow anything since season 3 - when their respective yellow lines got cut/burnt. This one here is about , a yellow line of communication being re-established. What adds to this is the directorial choices - the yellow flag is waves around before they connect themselves with a yellow line (hose) - as a piece of directorial foreshadowing I am in love - its telling us the Buck is the one who is the creator of the yellow flags (read his jealousy) and he is the one with the yellow rag (in the same way he was the one with the red rag previously), but that it will ultimately lead to Buck and Eddie reconnecting after those flags are raised and dealt with. I cannot stress enough the importance of that yellow line between them being reconnected - it really speaks of their communication improving and that we'll see them operating on a level we haven't seen before - they cut their yellow lines at the time when Eddie was changing his will, and whilst they have spoken on important topics etc since then, there has always been something in between them - they haven't had a proper full cards on the table conversation. My feeling is that we might be about to get that (especially combined with what we know from what Oliver and Ryan have teased!)

Then there is Chimney who is separated from everyone else by virtue of being the only one in a long sleeved shirt. If you watch the scene through, and pay attentiion to the background, you'll see all the firefighters in either short sleeve shirts or wearing bomber jackets. there is one exception - a guy carrying a medical bag who I'm pretty sure is meant to be a representaion of Hen's reinstatment to the 118 as he crosses Chim at the time Chim announces Hen has been reinstated!

Thats all from me this week - hope you enjoyed! I'm off to prepare myself for Thursday night!!!

Tagged peeps below!

@theladyyavilee @mistmarauder @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @mandzuking17 @spotsandsocks @loveyou2thecore @rogerzsteven @wanderingwomanwondering @oneawkwardcookie @leothil @copyninjabuckley @shammers86 @crazyfangirlallert @missmagooglie @katyobsesses @radiation-run @gayandbifiremenofmine @bi-moonlight @crazyaboutotps @princesschez75 @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @sherlocking-out-loud @tommykinarddd @satashiiwrites

#kym costume meta #911 costume meta #911 meta #911 abc #7x03 #season 7 #kym colour theory #911 colour theory #911

[olderthannetfic]

Detroit: become Human antis fascinate me. "If you ship Connor/Hank you're a pedo", I expected. Pedo is to an anti as communism/socialism is to a conservative, a buzzword to throw at everything you dislike. "Connor/Markus is bad because you're fetishizing interracial couples", I was not expecting, since... well, they're not really any given race. They're modeled on their voice actors, but they're androids, and in-universe that's very much the line along which they're socially stratified. They're the same race. "Markus/North is bad because you're fetishizing interracial relationships AND North is an abuse victim so you're fetishizing 'rescue romances' AND you're saying women need a man!" Actually I just think it'd be cute for North/Markus/Connor to be a thing and for her to be supportive and sweet and everybody's loving, tough, cool lady partner, I wasn't thinking about... any of that, honestly. "Connor/Kara is bad because you're taking away from her accomplishments as an independent woman and making her story about men!" Oh cool I didn't know women could have a storyline OR a relationship but not both, meanwhile men can have both.

And yet all the actual flaws of the text - and there are so, so many - just sail over their heads. Their whole thing is that they're totally not in a cult or obsessed with ships, they're into social justice. Yet they don't have a word to say on the way the text tackles race, oppression, abuse, etc. It's just about how your ship is bad but their preferred ship isn't.

In the end I think DbH antis are what snapped me out of my anti tendencies. Both of my siblings are antis, so you'd think I would've been bound to go that route, but seeing how every single pairing was viewed as an indicator of something horrible inside you reminded me a lot of the fire-and-brimstone preachers we have here in the South. Everything is evil, everything is an indicator you're bad, you're shit, you're terrible, repent now of your sin/ship.

In the end all it did was make me support everybody's ships. I don't do ship wars. We're all "problematic" to someone. I support whatever you're doing. (So long as you're not an asshole.)

--

It really is stark with DBH. It's so easy to find things to criticize legitimately. Many of them are even social justice things.