#next time: ossus!

[beskarfrog]

Okay, so we all agree that Luke having to marry Mand’alor Din for political reasons is a quality au. What if Luke accidentally gets politically engaged to some other planetary leader instead?

Let’s say that perhaps his connection to Leia automatically made him a candidate for diplomatic marriage, especially after Leia and Han get married. Maybe it was a major clause in the funding for his Jedi school, but Luke didn’t really think they’d ever actually marry him off. For the sake of the au, let’s also disregard bits of TBOBF and Mando S3. 

Luke’s been building his school on Ossus, Grogu is enjoying Jedi training, and there are a couple other students. And perhaps, Din actually becomes Mand’alor and retakes Mandalorian space. Maybe he visits the Jedi school pretty often to see his son and get away from politics.

Luke can really sympathize with having the weight of the universe and a glowing sword tossed at you with no warning. So maybe he and Din become friends after a while and maybe that friendship becomes something different. There start being blushes when someone gets pinned in a spar, falling asleep together on the couch after dinner, running around after the younglings constantly. Din visits as often as he can and has about made up his mind to just ask Luke if he would consider moving the Jedi school to Concordia so they’d at least be in the same star system most days, if not on the same planet.

That's when Luke gets an urgent holocall from Leia, informing him that he’s just been engaged to some bigwig princess as part of a treaty with a rich planet the New Republic has been courting. Luke is absolutely panicking to Din, going on about how the terms of the treaty basically forbid him from keeping his school. He’s looked at his funding agreement with the New Republic and he can’t get out of it without losing money unless he’s already married to someone.

And then Din thinks of the most beautiful solution to both of their problems. Everyone else thinks that they’re already a couple, as much as Din has denied it. Bo-Katan has been harassing him for months about spending so much time off-world to go see his little family. Mandalore could really use a trade agreement with the New Republic.

The next logical step is, of course, for Din to propose in the middle of Luke’s kitchen while his Jedi friend is struggling not to go into a dark spiral about losing his school funding. It's simple, really. They just have to get married right that moment, which would fix the school funding issue. Luke moves the school to the Mandalore system so Din can see him and the kids all the time without giving Bo-Katan a new gray streak. And Mandalore probably gets a trade agreement out of it. What’s not to like?

Luke is so stunned he accidentally pours the calming tea he was making directly onto the kitchen floor.

#dinluke #the mandalorian #text post #au #mand'alor din djarin #listen i love the aus where they meet for the first time already engaged #but think how funny this would be #din thinks the best form of flirting is showing how practical and good at problem solving you can be #he is an acts of service kind of guy #luke on the other hand has a major crush on din and up until that moment was pretty sure din was just tolerating him for grogu's sake

[kowaiitenshii]

[Wish We Never Met]

Pairing: Kylo Ren x Reader 

Plot Summary: You haven’t seen Kylo Ren since he destroyed the Jedi academy you both called home in your youth, and you want nothing more than to forget about him. That doesn’t stop him from reaching out. 

Warnings: Kidnapping. Kylo is his own warning. Angst? 

Word Count: 2.3k

A/N: Hello again everyone! This oneshot is the product of a betrayal prompt from a good friend of mine! If this does well and people enjoy it, I will be open to prompts and requests and if the demand is high enough, I may even write a part 2 for this. Thank you so much for all the love on Sunkiller Lullaby again as well!! Please enjoy! 

A perfectly clear night on Ossus, a rare meteor shower had been forecasted that night, and you didn’t dare to miss it.

You and your best friend, Ben Solo, had snuck out against your Master’s wishes to watch the shower together. 

It was once in a lifetime, after all. 

You couldn’t have thought of a better person to sneak out with, you’d known him since you were just ten years old; not that you had many other friends in the academy regardless. 

The two of you never quite fit in with the other padawan learners, having earned reputations for being too reckless, too quick to anger, too ready for a fight. But you found solace in one another, always sparring, studying, or shirking off your responsibilities to go on some ill-advised adventure together. 

As the two of you grew, as did your fondness for one another. Master Luke began separating you more and more, fearing that you would build ties too strong to sever. 

Attachment, of course, was strictly forbidden. 

But that did little to stop you from stealing away to see the person whom you were closest with in the entire world whenever you could.

The two of you laughed like the foolish teenagers you were as you ran through the lush green field littered with wildflowers together hand-in-hand, searching for the perfect spot to watch the show.

Cresting the top of the hill, Ben suddenly dropped  to the ground, pulling you along with him as you tumbled down through the long grass. As you came to a stop, landing on top of him at the bottom of the hill, you playfully punched him in the arm. 

“You really ought to be more careful Ben! We could have gotten hurt!” you scolded him, still laughing like mad. 

“You know I wouldn’t let that happen!” he reassures you, laughing back at you as you shift off of him and take a seat next to him in the tall grass. 

The two of you spent a long time in comfortable silence, watching the meteors shoot over your heads. It was an awe-inspiring sight, countless comets of every colour followed by their glowing tails lighting up the entire sky above. It truly was beautiful, and you were still unsure if you’ve seen such beauty since. 

You spent hours just watching, enchanted by the ethereal lightshow. 

That is, until you looked towards Ben, and instead of watching the beauty of the stars, he was watching you. 

Your breath caught in your throat, and your heart swelled in an unfamiliar way as you looked at him, realising in that moment that he had grown up, no longer the awkward, lanky boy you knew as a child. 

His eyes sparkled innocently in the dim light, reflecting the colours of the stars. His lips were pink and parted, as if to ask something that was caught just on the tip of his tongue. His long raven hair blew in the gentle breeze, tousled by your tumble down the hill. 

For a split second, you envisioned running your fingers carefully through his soft locks to fix it for him before forcing yourself to look away. 

Cheeks hot and heart thumping in your chest, you tried to remind yourself of the rules of the Jedi you so desperately tried to uphold. You knew attachment was wrong, and love could only serve to destroy you. And yet, the idea of a life lived without ever knowing love, that kind of love, left a hole in your heart that ached for it. 

Clenching your fists so tightly your nails dug into the palms of your hands and closing your eyes, you tried your hardest to push your feelings down, to bottle them up and seal them away. 

The gentle feeling of Ben carefully, almost sheepishly placing a large hand to your left cheek and turning you to face him snapped you out of your quiet rumination. The sensation of his touch was warm and tingling, spreading goosebumps across your skin like wildfire. 

Your eyes met again, Ben measuring your reaction, looking hesitantly from your eyes to your lips and back again, as if he too could sense what you were feeling. 

Given the tender, vulnerable expression that spread across his countenance, you knew that he could. The rough pad of his thumb ghosted over your cheekbone, your skin feeling electrified as he touched it, the energies between you rich and palpable. 

“(Y/N)...” He whispered your name like a prayer. 

Before he could speak again, you would take his face between your hands, crashing your lips into his in a moment of reckless abandon. 

They’re soft and wet, the feeling of the kiss itself and the mixing of energies setting you both on fire. 

You lose yourself in it, all teeth and tongue and burning desire, kissing him over and over again. 

Ben is just about to lay you down right there, in the soft grass beneath the stars, before you force yourself to pull away. Sitting up pin straight and wiping the spit away from your lips, you were too ashamed to even look back at him. 

The world goes black. 

The next scene that plays is the one that has torn you apart for years. 

Standing before the devastated Jedi academy you called home for nearly your entire life, you watched as it burned to ash. Tears flowed in rivers down your cheeks as you sobbed in agony of all that was lost, all because of the boy you loved. 

Falling to your knees, Ben’s name tore its way out of your throat in a grief-stricken scream.

Eyes flying open, you jolt upright in bed. 

You’re then hit by the same cold realisation that it was all a dream, as you are every time you have that dream. Although, you suppose it's more of a recollection than a dream. 

Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you groan groggily as you spot the familiar silhouette of a man’s astral body across the room. 

“Ugh… Go away Kylo.” you moan, already becoming annoyed. 

Even if he wasn’t there physically, seeing him through the force hurt all the same. 

“You know I can’t, even if I wanted to.” he replies matter-of-factly, and you know it to be true. Whatever unseen force it is that binds you to each other, neither of you could control it. 

He haunts you like a ghost, torturing your very soul every time you would connect unannounced. His presence tonight is especially wounding, having been freshly reminded of the feelings you held for him despite everything. 

Throwing your covers off, you annoyedly begin to stoke the small fire pit in the centre of your hut, doing your best to ignore Kylo’s dark and magnetic presence looming in the shadows. 

“Where are you?” he asks abruptly, looking around the room and searching for any indicators of your location. 

You roll your eyes, finally looking in his face. His eyes are locked on you as he stands in the darkness of the room, the light of the flames illuminating his features. 

He’s every bit as handsome as you remember, all doe eyes and plump lips and strong nose. 

He’s gotten taller, and bulkier in terms of muscle than you remember, no doubt enhanced by his new training. Your heart strings tug painfully in your chest, and you remember why you avoid looking at him when this happens. 

“You know I can’t answer that.” you whisper solemnly in reply. 

“Why not?” he snaps back instantly.

“You know exactly why, Kylo Ren.” you sigh in irritation, spitting his name at him as if it tastes foul. You throw another log into the fire before standing and turning around, crossing your arms and doing your best to shut him out as your anger and frustrations build. 

“It would be so much easier if you would stop hiding, if you would just join me.” He continues, ignoring the vitriol in your tone and trying to coax the answer out of you. 

“I’m not hiding, Kylo. You just can’t find me. There’s a difference.” you scoff back at him, vaguely pleased when you hear him let out his own irritated sigh. 

You’ve been through this hundreds of times, your answers and his questions never changing. Everytime you speak to him, everytime you look at him, the void in your chest that calls to him grows wider. And with great pain every time, you deny him.

It’s torture, the purest form you could imagine. 

“You called to me. In your dream. I heard it.” he asserts in a gentler tone, as if it would change anything. You dig your nails into the skin of your arms in an attempt to temper the rage bubbling up inside of you. 

“I’m tired of fighting Kylo.” you sigh. “Can’t you see that? That’s why I’m here, in a hut in the fucking jungle.” you spit, an edge of hurt in your tone that you pray he doesn’t hear.

“Then why won’t you just come to me?” He tries desperately to persuade you. “I will take care of anything, everything you need. It could be so simple if you would just-” he starts on the same tirade that he starts every time you see each other. 

The fresh pain of the memories, the aching of your heart at seeing him, listening to the same argument; it’s finally all too much. The dam you’ve built to withhold your emotions finally breaks, your hurt finally overflowing as you spin on your heel to face him, screaming out the truth as you cut him off. 

“Because I love you, Ben! Because I love you, and you’ve destroyed everything else I’ve ever cared about! And I hate myself for it!” you bark at him through gritted teeth, hot tears welling up in your eyes and threatening to spill over.  

His brow furrows in frustration and shock as he yells back at you.

 “You know that isn’t the truth! I didn’t-” 

Clutching the sides of your head in frustration, you continue screaming, cutting him off once more. 

“Everyday I wake up and I’m forced back into the hell that is the realisation that this is my reality!” you gesture feverishly around the humble, run down hut in which you both stand, then between the two of you. “This is my reality, and I will never forgive you for it Ben.” your voice breaks, your anger spent and only leaving you with aching despair as the tears finally begin to fall. 

“I loved you, I really loved you.” you choke out between cries, the growing lump in your throat making it hard to speak. 

For once he’s silent, saying nothing as he looks upon you with widened eyes. 

He’s visibly taken aback, and the realisation finally hits you that you just admitted your love to him, and that you hadn’t called him by his name, his true name, since the incident that ripped you away from each other. 

He turns away from you, hiding the tears welling in his own eyes. 

“I don’t need your forgiveness.” he whispers, and you take one last look at him before he promptly vanishes. 

Left alone in the crippling emptiness of the hut you call home, you fall to your knees under the crippling weight of your sorrow, wracked with anguished sobs. 

Elsewhere in the galaxy, Kylo Ren wipes the stray tears from his face and steels his nerves, before throwing on his cloak and helmet. 

He could feel your presence even more acutely in the force now, the bond strengthened by your heated confession. It was certainly not one he had expected, but he had no doubt now that he would track you down.

All he would have to do is follow your signature. 

Your words were all the confirmation he needed as he stormed out of his personal quarters to gather a fleet, barking the orders to gather his knights at a commanding officer. 

If you refused to give yourself willingly to him, he would just have to take you. 

The next morning, you awaken suddenly to the sound of Stormtroopers blowing the door clean off of your hut. 

In an instant you leap to your feet, ready to defend yourself from any danger. Time moves in slow motion as you look out the door, the mass of troopers, fronted by the Knights of Ren  parting like the fabled red sea. 

Blood running cold, your heart drops to your feet as you lay eyes upon their leader who moves to the forefront, Kylo Ren.

You’re stricken with the awful, ice-cold revelation that he had used your bond in the force against you. 

It lead him right to you. 

Frantically turning to reach for a weapon, you’re cut short as a blaster hits you with a stun ray, rendering you unconscious. 

Your body falling to the floor with a soft thud, Kylo Ren strides over to where your body lay crumpled, just within the doorway, sighing regretfully. Crouching over you, he frowns as he softly brushes a lock of hair out of your face.

“It could have been so much easier.” he whispers like an apology, before carefully scooping you into his arms.

He takes a moment to look at you, admiring the beauty of his prize before carrying you onto his ship.

#ben solo x reader #ben solo x you #ben solo x y/n #ben solo x f!reader #kylo ren x y/n #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x female reader #kylo ren x f!reader #star wars x reader #star wars imagines #star wars imagine #kylo ren x you

[thornescratch]

Okay TBOBF and Mando Season 3 have been twenty pounds of stupid in a ten pound bag a lot of the time, but it’s funny if, like, ever since then and the destruction of the Razor Crest that Din has been collecting friends and allies just so he has a variety of places to shower and piss and do his laundry at. Frequent pit stops waltzing in and out of Tatooine and Nevarro and Ossus just for that purpose. He stayed friendly with Bo Katan because her Gauntlet has a fresher in it.

Luke: (meditating with eyes closed) Are you here to do your laundry again. Din: (awkwardly hiding bag of dirty flightsuits behind his back) ...I love you? Luke: You didn't answer my question. Luke: ...I left you some food in the fridge and also we're low on milk, can you bring some by next time. Grogu: Patoo.

#Luke Skywalker #Din Djarin #Dinluke #Star Wars #The Mandalorian #The Mandalorian spoilers

[letmehavemyfictionalmen]

Stars Collide; Star-Crossed: prologue

Summary: As the dust settles, Din can't shake the weight of an indescribable feeling. A feeling that he's done something he can never make amends for. Little does he know, fate has plans to intervene and an unknown ally is on their way to his aid.

pairing: Din Djarin x afab!Skywalker!reader

warning: 18+ content, Eventual smut, Unprotected sex, Violence, Blood, Age-Gap, Kidnapping, Domestic Bliss, Fluff, a sprinkle of Angst, Idiots in love, Flirting, possessive!Din, powerful!reader, Jedi!reader, Grogu being adorable, Grogu loves his Ma more than his buir.

next

Din Djarin, the Mandalorian, is a man of few words and little emotion. His stoicism is legendary throughout the galaxy, once a shield against the harsh realities of the galaxy, now only serves to amplify the ache within his chest.

A weight on his shoulders that no amount of Beskar can protect him from, a cloak that he cannot remove.

The blinking of the control panel punctuates the stillness, but Din's attention is elsewhere, lost in a sea of self-doubt and regret. His steel resolve is shaken, and he questions the path he has chosen.

Din is engulfed by the blanket of the silence of his ship, surrounded by the hum of machinery and the faint beeping of his instruments. The silence, a constant reminder of his decision, a soothing melody that provides no comfort to his troubled soul.

He tries to push the guilt down, to ignore the haunting memories of the youngling's trusting eyes and outstretched arms, but the ache in his heart persists.

He remembers the soft cooing of the Child, the gentle touch of his tiny hands. But now, all of that is gone. He is alone, and the guilt is suffocating like a relentless predator tearing him apart.

The Child's touch, small and fragile, and wonders if he will ever feel it again. The Child's laughter, pure and joyful, and wonders if he will ever hear it again. The Child's vulnerability, and wonders if he will ever be able to protect him again.

Lost in thought, memories flooded his mind. Images of his own childhood, filled with trauma and pain, collided with the sight of the child's trusting eyes.

For the first time in a long time, Din feels something stir within him. Was it remorse? Regret? He couldn't quite say.

Din takes a deep breath, trying his best to collect his thoughts, failing to do so when his eyes fall on the silver ball from the Razor Crest’s lever.

Din's gaze lingers on the shining orb, his mind tangled in a web of uncertainty and dread. He feels the weight of what-ifs bearing down on his chest like a thousand stones, crushing him with the fear of what the remnants of the Empire could do to the child.

The tendrils of darkness seem to curl around his heart, their icy grip tightening as he envisions the fate that awaits the innocent youngling, the light within him threatened by the shadowy claws of evil

As if in a trance, Din's gloved fingers quiver as they brush against the cold metal of the control panel. The ship's steady hum dwindles into a soft whisper, fading into the background like a distant memory.

In the deafening silence, he is left with only the weight of his determination, heavy as an anchor, pulling him towards a path that will forever change his destiny.

The flicker of the forge that once burned in the armourer’s workshop now blazes in Din’s eyes with unyielding determination.

The Razor Crest is put back to rest as Din Djarin sets out to right the wrongs of his past, and to reclaim the trust that he has lost.

He knows that the road ahead will be fraught with peril, but he also knows that he cannot rest until he has set things right.

The stars overhead the parked ship bear witness to his journey, and the guilt that propels him forward, ever forward, towards a brighter tomorrow.

As the sun sets over the tranquil planet of Ossus, the sky blazes with a palette of warm hues, painting the world in a golden glow. The air is thick with a sense of peace, as if the planet itself were exhaling a long-held breath. Birds soar through the sky, their feathers catching the last rays of light, as they glide effortlessly towards their nests.

The Force flows through the air like a gentle stream, carrying with it a sense of serenity and calm. It is as if the very fabric of the universe is at peace here, allowing the Jedi to draw upon its power with ease.

As the evening settles in, the sounds of nature begin to take center stage. The rustling of leaves in the trees, the chirping of crickets, and the soft babbling of a nearby brook all weave together into a symphony of sound that fills the air.

Peace reigns supreme on Ossus, a sanctuary of serenity amidst the chaos of the galaxy. The Force flows through everything, a life-giving energy that suffuses every rock and tree, every creature that calls this world home. As the sun sets, the beauty of Ossus remains, an eternal reminder of the power and majesty of nature.

As the radiant sun descends below the horizon, casting its last golden rays across the tranquil planet of Ossus, you sit amidst the serenity and beauty of the sunset.

With eyes gently closed and back straight, your visage radiates the expression of eternal peace, enraptured by the flow of the Force that courses through you and everything around you.

Every breath of the cool, refreshing air fills you with a sense of calm and clarity, and the rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of birds lend a harmonious melody to the symphony of nature around you.

In this moment, you are one with the universe, and the universe is one with you.

Amidst the symphony of the cosmos, enraptured in the cosmic dance, you fail to perceive the mellifluous whispers of a Force spirit, summoning you by name.

As your eyes flutter open, they meet the resplendent sunset, a symphony of colors playing out before you. Slowly turning your head, you notice the rocky ledge beside you, and there, a figure sits, watching you with a soft smile. It's the man who raised you, the one who taught you the ways of the Force, and the one who has been with you through it all.

Obi-Wan Kenobi.

The smile of serenity that graces your father-figure's face transforms into one of pure admiration as you turn to face him. His voice carries your name with a familiar tenderness, evoking the same warmth that used to comfort you in your youth.

“You have grown stronger, one with the force, my Starshine. Sometimes it is hard to believe you are the same whiny little girl who wouldn’t stop asking for blue milk pudding, every night.” Obi-Wan teases, voice laced with amusement, his eyes crinkling with his smile, reminiscing about the past.

You roll your eyes playfully at your mentor, “Well, I was just a child, but I’m all grown up now.”

“Indeed you have, truly, but your penchant for mischief still reminds me of a certain reckless young padawan I once knew. Why did you have to inherit your Anakin’s impetuousness?" Obi-Wan questions, faking exasperation with a gentle smile, his eyes sparkling with fondness.

“Well you always did say that I was the perfect balance of my mother and father. It was to be expected of me. Plus, I was raised by you, what does that say about you, old Ben?” Your lips curl with a playful grin, mischief dancing in their every spin.

Obi-Wan resigns with a soft shake of his head, fully aware that his skill with words cannot surpass your own. For you wield your tongue and language like a saber against your foes, yet like a gentle blade of love to your cherished ones.

As Obi-Wan's fingers graze your cheek, his eyes convey a pride that words cannot articulate. “You have become a force to be reckoned with, my dear Starshine, and it is for this reason that I entrust you with a crucial task.”

Your brows knit together, creating a tapestry of confusion on your face. Tilting your head ever so slightly, you inquire, “What task, Uncle Ben?”

Obi-Wan withdraws his hand from your cheek, his gaze piercing into yours with a solemnity that sends a shiver down your spine. "There is a youngling, Nova. A child who is strong in the Force, like you and I. He needs our help, and I believe, with all my heart, that you are the one who can fulfill this task.”

As the weight of the task settles in your chest, you lean in closer, your eyes narrowing with a fierce determination. "Speak to me, Uncle Ben. Who is this Child that needs rescuing? And who is it that seeks to bring harm to him?" you inquire, your voice carrying a sense of urgency and concern.

Obi-Wan's gaze grows distant, lost in thought. "I do not know all the details, but I know that he is being pursued by the remains of the Empire. I sense a great danger surrounding this child, and it is imperative that we act quickly."

Your heartstrings tighten, a deep ache settling in your chest at the mere thought of a youngling being in danger. Children have always been a weakness of yours that you cannot overcome to this day.

Children make you vulnerable, the sight of them melts you into the mold of maternal instincts. To hear of someone hurting younglings is horrifying to you.

The wounds your father inflicted upon the younglings of the Jedi Temple still fester in your soul, a reminder of the darkness that once consumed him.

With a resolute gaze, you turn to your mentor, the one who has always been your guiding light. "I cannot just stand by and watch the Empire lay their hand on a youngling suffer," you say, your voice firm and unwavering. "Tell me, Uncle Ben, what must I do to help this child?"

A gentle warmth spreads across Obi-Wan's features, a reflection of the pride and fondness he feels for you in his heart, as he is moved by your unwavering determination to lend a hand.

"I knew I could count on you, my Starshine," he says, placing a hand on your shoulder. "The child’s current whereabouts is that of on the planet Nevarro. A bounty hunter has handed the child over to the fallen Empire. You must hurry, little one."

Your chin juts forward, a fire in your eyes that could rival the stars, “The force flows through me, Uncle Ben. I will not let the child be a victim of the Empire. Their safety is my duty, and I will see it done.”

Your unwavering spirit shines through as you pledge to see the mission through to its end. A pledge that echoes through the Force itself.

“I know you won’t fail me.” Obi-Wan utters with a gentle curve of his lips, akin to the graceful bend of a river flowing through a verdant valley.

As his smile warms your heart, you rise from your seat, the last glimmers of daylight slipping beyond the horizon, leaving the night sky adorned with a tapestry of glittering stars.

"Luke's worry for my safety knows no bounds," With a soft laugh, the words escape your lips like a playful breeze, "I must let him know of my plans and whereabouts, before departing."

Obi-Wan's eyes twinkle with mirth as he reminisces about the past, recalling the young, lanky blond boy who doted on you in a brotherly manner endlessly, oblivious to the fact that you were his youngest triplet sister.

A gentle rumble of laughter escapes Obi-Wan's lips, "Yes, Luke always did have a soft spot for you, fighting boys who mocked you like a brother would, even when he didn't know the truth about your connection."

A sense of longing tugs at your heartstrings as memories flood your mind like a torrential river. You hold onto the moment, cherishing the connection you share with your mentor, and feeling the comforting warmth of familiarity.

A gentle breeze blows, rustling the leaves of the trees, and you can almost hear the whispers of the Force echoing around you.

You take a moment to collect your thoughts and emotions, feeling the gravity of the situation at hand. You draw in a deep breath, steeling your resolve for what lies ahead. "I won't let you down, Uncle Ben," You declare with unyielding will.

Obi-Wan nods in approval, a sense of pride emanating from his being. "I have no doubt that you will succeed, my Starshine. May the Force be with you."

You smile wistfully at your mentor, your heart feeling as though it's being pulled in two. This moment between the two of you seems almost too precious to let go of. "May the Force guide us both,"

The spectral image of your beloved mentor fades before you, his voice echoing in your mind. His final words stir a deep longing within you, a desperate yearning for the comfort of his presence once more.

The wispy tendrils of his essence swirl around you, whispering a farewell that lingers long after he has vanished from sight. You stand alone, the cool breeze of the Force brushing against your skin, as you struggle to reconcile the emptiness left in his wake.

You close your eyes, feeling the weight of his absence like a heavy cloak, yet the gentle touch of his guidance still lingers in the very fabric of your being, a reminder of his fatherly love for you and your vow to protect the child at all costs.

As you open your eyes to the starry night sky, a cool breeze brushes against your skin, whispering of the adventure ahead. You take one last look at the ethereal landscape before you, shrouded in the veil of darkness.

It's a moment of serenity, a calm before the storm, and your heart swells with a deep sense of purpose. With unwavering conviction, you turn towards your ship, its metallic frame glinting in the moonlight.

A journey awaits, one that could alter the path of your fate and the destiny of the galaxy. You take a deep breath, ready to embrace the unknown, and begin your ascent towards the stars, leaving the tranquil wilderness behind.

☼ Please note that I do not wish to have my work translated or published on any third party reading websites. I claim the rights to my work.

☼ Where I don’t have any rights to the characters, many ideas and OC are my own creation. Please respect that.

#din djarin #din djarin x you #din djarin fluff #din djarin x female reader #din dijarin x reader #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin x reader #mandalorian x y/n #the mandalorian #mandalorian and grogu #grogu djarin #skywalker!reader #jedi!reader #female!reader #the mandalorian x y/n #mandalorian x reader #mandalorian x oc #din djarin x y/n #din djarin fic #din dijarin fanfiction #pedro x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #star wars #the mandalorian fanfiction #din and grogu #grogu my beloved #grogu the child #mando x reader #mando x you

[ginjithewanderer]

[Tetora Nagumo] What I Like 4☆ — The Back of a Man Among Men

Writer: Nishioka Maiko || Season: Winter Character appearances: Tetora, Arashi

"What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?"

Translation under the cut

Tetora: Hmhmhmm…♪ I’m back~

Arashi: Oh? Tetora-kun, welcome back.

Arashi: Are you done with work already? You're back surprisingly early. Didn't you say you might be late? I thought for sure that you wouldn’t be back until late at night.

Tetora: Ossu. That's what I thought, too, but I got done earlier than I expected~

Arashi: I see. Well, I'm glad you got done without any troub—

Arashi: Kyaah!

Tetora: Woah!? Wh-what's wrong? You startled me just yelling all of a sudden, y'know?

Arashi: Tetora-kun, this is bad! Your ear! Your earlobe!

Tetora: Huh?

Arashi: Your earlobe is bleeding!

Tetora: Hm…?

Tetora: Ah, it really is. My piercing hasn't healed all the way yet, so I guess it might be bleeding because my earring got caught on my clothes or something.

Arashi: Uh-uh. You can't just wipe it off so casually like that! What if it gets infected!?

Arashi: Okay. Come here. I'll give you a hot soak.

Tetora: H-'hot soak'…? What's that? It sounds kinda like 'hot soup' in English, so I guess it's something yummy?

Arashi: Nope. A hot soak is when you use warm salt water on the affected area to help it heal better.

Arashi: Piercings are delicate, so you can't use regular disinfectants.

Arashi: Don't worry, this won't hurt. Come on, come here and sit still.

Tetora: Ossu. I'll take you up on that, then.

Arashi: Dab, dab…And, there.

Arashi: Oh? This earring…It's not the one you usually wear, is it?

Tetora: Ah, yeah. Today's work was kinda formal, so I wore this clear one that isn't really visible from a distance.

Tetora: I wonder if this piercing is even worth it for me if it’ll keep getting caught in my clothes~. It probably started bleeding because it got caught on something in a weird way.

Arashi: Hmm, that is strange. I wonder if it keeps getting caught on things because you’re not used to it yet.

Arashi: You can’t take the earring out until it heals up, though, or the hole will close up…

Arashi: I know. How about we go shopping for new ones the next time we’re free? I’ve been meaning to look for some small ones for myself, too.

Arashi: I can recommend you a shop, but would you be okay with that?

Tetora: Oh. Can I? If it’s one you recommend, I wanna go, too!

Arashi: That’s decided, then ♪ Let’s go out the next time we’re free.

Arashi: Kyaah ♪ All of them are so cute. With this many choices, I’ll never be able to decide.

Arashi: Oh, well~. Even though there are so many cute things, I want to save money this month…They’re all so tempting.

Arashi: Ah, I can’t get distracted and have fun on my own like this. I’m not here to shop for myself today.

Arashi: What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?

Tetora: U~myu. Let me think…Ah, these are nice and simple.

Tetora: I like this kinda thing, but I don’t know how fashionable they are…

Tetora: I don’t really have much of a fashion sense. That’s why I wanna hear your opinion. What do you think of these?

Arashi: Hey. You don’t need to worry about every little thing like that. After all, the most important part of fashion is wearing what you like!

Arashi: Besides, it’s not like you don’t have a good fashion sense. These earrings are nice, aren’t they? I think they’ll suit you.

Tetora: You think so? If they have your seal of approval, I’ll get them~♪ That said, which ones do you like, Narukami-senpai?

Arashi: Me? Well—

Arashi: I like these, and earrings like these are nice, too…Ah, these! I like these ones. Mmm, it’s too bad I can’t buy them. I’ll have to come back when I have some more money.

Arashi: Oh, well, that’s okay. Our main goal today was to get you some earrings. We did achieve that.

Tetora: Ossu. I’ll go pay for these, then!

Arashi: Okaaay, see you in a bit. I’ll go look around that clothing store over there. Please do call out to me once you’re done.

Arashi: I’m so glad you could find something you like.

Tetora: Ossu! It’s just as I’d expect from a store you like. All the accessories there were designed really well. It was really neat.

Tetora: I wanna go there again. Thank you so much!

Arashi: Hehe. Just hearing you say that makes it feel worth recommending it to you.

Tetora: —Also, here.

Arashi: Huh? What’s this package?

Tetora: It’s thanks for today. I’m sorry it’s so small.

Arashi: Huh!? You don’t need to thank me, though!

Arashi: But…thank you. I’m glad. Is it okay if I open it?

Tetora: Of course!

Arashi: —Oh, my! These are the earrings I liked from that store! When did you…

Tetora: Heheh. I’m not great at giving presents, so I wasn’t sure what would be good enough as thanks, but…

Tetora: Obviously, you’d want to give anyone something they’d like, right? That’s why I didn’t buy anything beforehand. I just quietly did my research and bought these earlier.

Arashi: …You’re amazing, Tetora-kun.

Tetora: Huh? Did you say something, Narukami-senpai?

Tetora: Ah! Are these not good enough as a thank you!?

Arashi: Nope. Not at all. I’m really happy with these. Thank you so much. I’ll treasure them ♪

Tetora: I’m really glad you like them! Let’s go home, then.

Arashi: (Mm~…And I thought you were still just a cute junior. I really look forward to what the future holds for you…♪)

Tetora: ? Narukami-senpai, what’s wrong~? You almost got left behind, y’know~?

Arashi: Yeah, yeah. I’m coming, Tetora-kun!

#so can we talk about the tetonaru dynamic #and more importantly about the name of the story vs the end with arashi looking at tetora's back #the symbolism of it all. expect a ramble on my other blog tomorrow #the moment i read this (earlier today) i knew i had to tl it. my friend and i have 4 hours' worth of messages of us just screaming about it #i had to pace around my room from all the emotions this made me feel #<- most normal tetora fans #enstars #ensemble stars #tetora nagumo #arashi narukami #enstars translation #an's translation

[sweetrevxnge]

Like Phantoms, Forever

Chapter Twenty | Across the Stars

Pairing: Ben Solo x Reader

Summary: Your destiny had never been clear to you, only becoming so when it led you to leaving behind the life you knew to train with the galaxy's sole Jedi Master, Luke Skywalker. His Jedi Academy became your new home, bringing with it the promise of someday becoming a Jedi Knight. While navigating the ways of the Force, an inexplicable connection forms between you and a fellow student—the heir to the legendary Skywalker bloodline, Ben Solo. Together, the two of you must face your destinies and forge the path to your true selves.

What to expect: fluff, violence, sexual content, general angst, mentions/descriptions of injury and death

Additional info: this story is set in 28 ABY, six years prior to the events of TFA

*concurrently being published on AO3 and Wattpad as well!

Masterlist

Spotify Playlist

Word count: 6.4k

Chapter-specific CW: NSFW, descriptions of drowning

A/N: yes, I took 6 months to update this. no, I don't have any good excuses. but if you're still here reading along, know that I appreciate you so, so much and am trying my best to write more often :') ALSO... since starting this story, Lucasfilm has officially stated that Luke's academy is located on Ossus, so I'm going to edit the story to match that!

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“Geegee, set course for Ilum.”

Ben’s voice echoed through the steel ship as you watched the Academy fade into the distance, lost in the green expanse of Ossus. You stood at the back of the ship’s hull, choosing to watch your departure from a narrow viewport rather than the cockpit.

“Right away, Master Solo,” said the droid, joints squeaking as it tottered to the cockpit.

As the roar of the ship’s engines lowered to a hum, unease crept in. While the thought of venturing into the galaxy to find a kyber crystal once filled you with excitement, it now made your stomach churn. It’s going to be okay, you told yourself, trying to make it true.

Leaving the safety of the New Republic’s surveillance was hard enough on its own, let alone voyaging to a foreign ice planet in the Unknown Regions. It wasn’t all bad, though. Knowing that Geegee automatically transmitted a signal back to the Academy provided you some comfort.

Behind you, you could hear the clicks and whirs of the control panel as Ben prepared the hyperdrive. You turned around, finding him hunched over the panel, muttering something about the motivator. Despite his frustration, he carried an air of confidence as he worked. Shoulders relaxed, hair pushed back from his eyes. It was a stark contrast to the first time you had flown with him in the Grimtaash.

The memory flashed in your mind when your eyes landed on the co-pilot’s seat—the same seat that cradled your bruised, bleeding body the night you escaped Zeffo. Just the thought of it was enough to make you doubt this entire journey.

Ben sat down in his chair, letting out an accomplished sigh as he rested his hands on his knees. With the coordinates entered and the drone of the engines steadily growing louder, you knew what was coming next.

“Everything alright over there?”

Ben’s voice snapped you from your trance. You let out a sharp breath, unaware that you had been holding it for the duration of your reverie.

“Princess?” he said louder this time, craning his neck to meet your gaze.

Whether it was your unconvincing nod or your failure to meet his gaze after his question that gave your apprehension away, you weren’t sure. Regardless, in a matter of seconds, he had jumped out of his chair and come to stand in front of you, hands clasped over yours in a firm—yet comforting—grip.

“Talk to me, princess.”

It came in pieces. The pounding in your temples, followed by the pungent taste of blood coating your tongue. But the memories weren’t strictly physical. Defeat and desperation replaced your climbing anxiety, polluting your senses with the stench of utter fear. All from just looking at a piece of furniture.

Just before you could unravel, Ben’s grip on you tightened, pulling you from your thoughts. It wasn’t until your name spilled over his lips, drenched with concern, that you pulled your gaze away from the co-pilot’s seat. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t–”

“Stop it.”

You stiffened. “Stop what?”

“Saying sorry all the time,” he said with a tsk. “I’m going to start charging you five credits every time you do it.”

“Well, the joke’s on you then. I don’t have any credits,” you said dryly.

Ben cocked an eyebrow at you and, without him saying a single word, you gave in. Exhaling a long breath, your nerves settled.

“It’s just hard being in here again, even under the best circumstances.” Without realizing it, you found yourself squeezing his hands in return, holding onto him like a lifeline. “Not to mention what would happen if I were unable to find a kyber crystal. Master Skywalker would send me into exile and I would be forced to live a life veiled in shame and failure–”

“Okay, I get it,” he said, fighting back a laugh. “But that’s not going to happen. It’s going to be okay, I promise,” he said, releasing your hands as he sat down again. “Now, we need to make the jump to hyperspace, which is unfortunately something you need to be sitting for. It’ll just be a moment, okay?”

You nodded in understanding, moving to sit in the co-pilot’s chair. But before you could lower yourself into the seat, Ben’s hands locked onto your waist, spinning you around and pulling you to sit on his lap.

A gasp escaped your mouth, earning a deep, amused laugh from the pilot. You whipped your head around, shooting him a disapproving look.

“What? I didn’t specify where you had to sit,” he said, squeezing your hips lightly. His gentle touch eased your nerves, calming you in a matter of seconds.

“You’re an infuriating man, you know that?” you said with mock ridicule.

“So I’m told.” Dimples framed his smile, melting away any remaining concern. If you didn’t know any better, you’d almost believe that his charm was more effective than any sedative a medical droid could offer. Almost.

Ben leaned forward, toggling a few more switches on the control panel. The feeling of his lips grazing the shell of your ear pulled you from your thoughts.

“Will you do me the honor?” he asked, weaving his fingers with yours as he guided your hand to the slender chrome lever in the center of the dashboard. The hyperdrive.

“Are you sure I’m qualified?” you asked.

With a peck on the cheek, he replied, “Absolutely.”

Your heart slammed into your ribs, causing your hands to tremble as you grabbed the rod. It was natural to be nervous about flying—especially when you were in the pilot’s seat. But the big arms wrapped around your torso assured you that you were safe.

As you pulled back on the lever, the engines roared in crescendo, launching the ship into hyperspace. The momentum pinned you against Ben, forcing you to grab onto the armrests for support. In the blink of an eye, the stars surrounding you transformed into blinding streaks of light before morphing into the swirling blue blur of deep space. To say it was exhilarating would be an understatement.

“Look at you,” Ben cooed, planting another kiss on your shoulder. “Before you know it, you’ll be piloting this thing all by yourself.”

You scoffed. “I seriously doubt that. I can barely operate a landspeeder without endangering myself and others.”

“Well, there’s only one way to get better, and I assure you, I’m a much better teacher than my uncle is.” Ben lowered his seat to a more comfortable position, pulling you back with him until you were resting against his chest.

“Is that so?” You couldn’t control your wandering hands as they crawled up the pleats of his robes, peeling back the fabric along his chest and neck.

He clasped your hands in his, holding them in place. “I mean it. After everything that happened, I want you to be comfortable piloting if you need to.”

There it was again, that horrible cloud that hung over your head at the mere mention of Zeffo. As if sensing this, Ben sighed and brought your fingers to his lips.

His warm breath spreading over your skin and his big, brown eyes peering up at you softened your resolve, leaving you no choice but to agree. “Fine. I’ll think about it.”

“I think you’ll find that I can be quite persuasive,” he said as he kissed the tender pads of your fingers, slowly working his way from pinky to thumb. He lingered on the last digit, dragging it over his plush lips. “Want me to show you?”

You nodded, mind turning hazy as you watched his lips, keenly aware of his other hand creeping under your tunic.

“Ben, we really shouldn’t,” you said halfheartedly, trying and failing to pull your hands free.

“Why not?”

“Because…” You drew the word out, motioning with your eyes to the empty hull of the ship. “This ship isn’t exactly private.”

He followed your gaze. “I see. Here, allow me to fix that.”

Without taking his attention off you, Ben flicked a switch on the control panel, causing the sliding door of the cockpit to close, hissing as it sealed you in.

“Better?” he asked, slipping his other hand under your robes, leaving a trail of gooseflesh behind as he inched towards your bra.

You breathed a sigh of relief as you rolled your hips forward, pressing down on his growing desire. “Much.”

He sucked in a sharp breath through his teeth. “Now, we need to address a different issue. You’re wearing too many clothes.” His wandering hands stopped at the clasp of your bra, undoing it in one swift motion. “Let’s fix that.”

Raising your arms over your head, you let him peel away the heavy cloth, kicking off your boots as he did the same with his robes. Arousal burned through you as you undressed in the small space, cursing the confines of the cockpit. Still in his uniform pants, Ben pulled you onto his lap again, eyes raking over your newly exposed skin like it was the first time he’d seen it.

All that remained now was your underwear, the only barrier between you and the rough cloth of his pants as you straddled his hips. “Why do I always end up more naked than you?”

“Shh…” A smirk ghosted his lips as strong hands moved to grab fistfuls of your ass, squeezing with a bruising force. “We wouldn’t want anyone overhearing us, would we?”

The heat simmering low in your belly quickly transformed into a wild flame, demanding attention. Lacing your fingers through his hair, you kissed down the curve of his neck, running along the taut muscles until you reached his collarbone.

“I can’t make any promises,” you said, teeth grazing his skin.

A low moan rumbled in his chest, vibrating on your lips. “Fuck,” he said under his breath, snaking a hand up your spine and doing the same to your hair. Tugging your head back, he leaned in close to your ear and whispered, “Then I’ll have to find another way to keep you quiet.”

With that, his grip loosened, fingers moving to trace over your jaw until his thumb slid over your bottom lip. “Open,” he ordered, trailing kisses down your chest, coming dangerously close to your breasts.

You obeyed, squirming in his lap from the anticipation, seeking any relief for the ache growing between your legs. As you parted your lips, he pushed his thumb into your mouth.

“Good. Now, suck.”

Head spinning with arousal, you swirled your tongue over his digit, earning a groan of approval from him. You stifled a gasp as he took a nipple into his mouth, alternating between sucking and rolling his tongue over it. Beneath you, you could feel his cock stiffening, causing your arousal to burn hotter.

Wanting to encourage this, you sucked harder, allowing your moans to rumble around his thumb. When his cock twitched against you, you beamed with pride.

A moment later, he released your nipple with a pop, free hand fumbling with the waistband of his pants. “I need to fuck you,” he said, practically begging as he worked his pants down.

Every nerve in your body was alight, needy for attention. He pulled his thumb away, watching in awe as a string of saliva fell from your lips before running it over the head of his cock. Pupils blown with lust, he wasted no time, dragging your underwear to the side and spreading your desire around your entrance.

With a grunt, he paused, searching your eyes. “Is this okay?”

“Yes,” you said breathlessly, aligning yourself with him. “Please.”

You both let out a sigh as he pushed into you, lips clashing together. Before long, you relaxed around him, sinking your hips lower, relishing how he stretched you. He moved slowly at first, giving you control as he closed his eyes and tipped his head back against the headrest. Dark locks of hair fanned over his face, clinging to the beads of sweat forming on his skin.

True to his word, he kept quiet, concealing his groans of pleasure as heavy breaths. The same couldn’t be said for you, who was letting out wanton moans with every thrust. It wasn’t for a lack of trying, though. The desire coursing through you had addled your mind, leaving you unable to control yourself.

A particularly loud gasp caught Ben’s attention, causing him to slow his movements. “Careful, princess.”

Nails digging into the armrests, you held back another moan. “Sorry—I just can’t—help it.”

“I know you can’t.” The corners of his lips twitched and before you knew it, his thumb was seeking entrance to your mouth again. “Now, be a good girl for me and stay quiet.”

Running your tongue over his thumb, you welcomed him in again, heat rushing to your core as you sucked. Ben’s breaths grew erratic as he continued to fuck into you, eyes trained on your lips. He effectively silenced you, but the few moans that managed to escape were now muffled by his thumb instead.

“That’s my girl,” he said, sliding his finger free and dropping it to your aching clit. “I think you deserve a reward.”

“Don’t tease, Ben,” you whimpered, eyes fluttering shut as he slowly applied pressure.

“Didn’t plan on it,” he said, drawing tight circles around your bud. 

The sensation was enough to drive you insane, hips rolling involuntarily against his hand, demanding more. Insatiable as ever, you pleaded for him to go faster, earning his cooperation.

“Fuck—baby—you look so good riding me.” His words were broken by quick breaths, evidence of his mounting pleasure. Your thighs burned from straddling his, trembling as your own pleasure threatened to wash over you. Every second you spent teetering on the edge felt torturous, stretching for eternity.

Desperate for release, you rolled your hips harder, forcing more pressure from Ben’s hand. A string of expletives fell from your lips as your resolve shattered, allowing the ecstasy bubbling beneath the surface to flood in. You bit down on the back of your hand, lost in the waves of euphoria that rippled through your body, your cunt pulsing around his cock.

With one last thrust, Ben gripped you tight, pulling you against his chest and burying his face into your neck. He littered your skin with sloppy kisses as he regained his composure, slowly leaning back into the seat.

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” you whispered, resting your forehead against his as your fingers traced over his rattling chest.

He let out a long sigh through his nose before agreeing. “Me too.”

Time passed like the stars swirling around you, and before long, the Grimtaash snapped out of hyperspace, revealing the ice planet of Ilum before you.

With a striking, silvery atmosphere, and patches of white storms riddling its surface, Ilum was truly a sight to behold. Unlike Dantooine and Ossus, there was no distinction between the terrains, only a vast, pale landscape.

“You weren’t lying about the snow,” you said, standing from your seat to get a better look.

“That’s what the coats are for,” Ben replied with a wink before calling back to the hull of the ship. “Geegee, prepare the landing sequence.”

The two of you had traded your robes for thermals and jackets in anticipation of landing, but despite the layers, a chill traveled down your spine. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought it was from the planet’s atmosphere radiating through the ship, but you knew what caused it. The prospect of adventure, traversing the unknown with the person you love by your side.

The realization felt like a blow to your chest, upsetting your balance as you reclaimed your seat. A string of beeps behind you pulled you from your thoughts. Master Skywalker’s astromech had come out of rest mode, now serving as a well-timed distraction.

Ben laughed under his breath. “No, Artoo. Your wheels will freeze to the ground if you go with us.”

The droid fired back, warbling as he rocked side to side on his wheels in defiance.

“You know I’m right! We can’t just sit around all day waiting for you to defrost.”

Another rebuttal from the droid, one that made Ben’s mouth fall open. “Just… stay on the ship, okay?”

R2-D2 concluded his argument with another string of beeps before spinning his head and body around and leaving the cockpit.

The low hum of machinery permeated the silence as you sat back in your seat, arms crossed over your chest. You would’ve given anything to know what R2-D2 had said to get under Ben’s skin the way he did.

Ahead, the Grimtaash entered the planet’s atmosphere, causing the ship to lurch as it sliced through the storm clouds. The floor beneath you no longer felt solid as the turbulence rattled the ship like a leaf in the wind, dread stirring in your stomach.

“Hold on tight—it’s going to be a rough landing,” Ben said, hunched over the control panel as he completed the landing sequence.

“Yeah, I gathered that!”

With knuckles blanched around the armrests, you squeezed your eyes shut and waited for the chaos to settle. When the ship finally touched the ground, you relaxed, letting out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

Running a hand through his glossy black hair, Ben smiled at you. “Welcome to Ilum.”

All the furs and thermals in the galaxy couldn’t have prepared you for the cold of Ilum. It was visceral, threatening to turn every drop of blood in your body into crimson ice. White flurries engulfed you, blinding you to your surroundings. If it weren’t for his hand clutching yours, you’d hardly be able to make out where Ben stood.

“Lovely weather this time of year, isn’t it?” he joked, voice raised over the howling wind.

You opened your mouth to respond but stopped when the chill spread through your teeth, prompting you to pull one of your many layers over your nose for coverage. “I didn’t think it was possible to be this cold.”

Shielding the snow from his eyes, he leaned in closer. “Once we get inside the caves, it won’t be so bad.”

From the depths of his coat pockets, he retrieved a small cylindrical device, struggling to activate it from the confines of his leather gloves. Finally, a blue digital map appeared in the center, displaying a system of caves and tunnels northeast of where you’d landed.

“There,” he said, his breaths strained from the weather. “The closest entrance is less than a kilometer away. Follow me.”

Wordlessly, you did as you were told, careful to step in Ben’s footprints to avoid sinking through the snow. The two of you were uncharacteristically quiet as you trekked through the tundra. You daydreamed about beams of sunlight, steaming cups of caf, and hot showers—just to name a few. More than just a coping mechanism for the intense cold, it also served as a distraction from the task awaiting you.

A natural opening in the crag served as your respite from the elements, inviting you to explore the labyrinth within. Despite being encased in frost and ice, the alcove felt warm, if only from the vapor of your breaths.

“So, where do we go from here?” you asked, voice hoarse from the wind.

“That’s kind of the problem,” Ben said, peeling off his wind-beaten jacket. “The Empire gutted this place, making it unstable in some areas. For now, we’ll follow the charted tunnels.”

“Why am I not surprised to hear that?” you grumbled, doing the same with your coat. It came as no surprise to learn that the Empire plundered the Jedi’s sacred planet, destroying the ancient temple housed in its caves as they did. Twisting the knife in the Jedi Order’s back.

“It’s what they did best. But that’s why we’re here,” he said, a smile tugging at his rosy lips. “To rebuild.”

To defend, you thought. Your heart sank at the idea of your efforts being in vain. What good would a fledgling Jedi Order be against a rising empire? If the old Order crumbled at the height of its power, Master Skywalker’s Order didn’t stand a chance.

You cleared your throat, pushing your thoughts aside and refocusing on the task at hand. “Right. Well, then. Where should we start?” you asked, glancing at the glowing holomap in his palm.

“That’s not my decision to make.” His eyes twinkled from the blue light of the map as he placed it in your hand.

As much as you wanted to reject it, you didn’t. He was right, after all. This was your journey; he was just here as support.

“Fine,” you said with a sigh. “But I don’t want to hear any complaints if we get lost.”

He smiled down at you. “Sure thing, princess.”

You nodded, holding his gaze for a moment longer. It was impossible to ignore his frostbitten beauty. Tendrils of hair clung to his forehead, the result of melted frost and sweat. The cold highlighted his sharp features more than ever, coloring his cheeks and nose in a peachy hue. Under different circumstances, you’d be happy to help him warm up.

Heat rushed to your face as you refocused on the holomap. Now was not the time—and most certainly not the place.

You examined the details of the holomap, trying to make sense of the labyrinth of grainy blue pathways. The crack you’d slipped through was just one of many that led to the caverns within, like veins tracing back to a heart. From what you could tell, the path you were on eventually let out into a central chamber, which then branched out into a handful of different tunnels. It was as good a starting point as any, and with a deep breath, you set out.

Ben followed behind you as you navigated the tunnel, with only the occasional drop of water breaking the comfortable silence. Stalactites adorned the ceiling, each bearing a unique state of damage. Every inch of the slate walls shimmered with ice crystals, reflecting in all directions as the blue glow of the holomap passed by. Slivers of clouded sunlight squeezed through cracks in the cavern’s walls, illuminating your footpath.

“What was your first time here like?” you asked over your shoulder, studying the mining scars etched into the walls for any sign of kyber.

“Loud,” he said, sighing. “I mean, just imagine a dozen teenagers running around a place like this. It’s a miracle we didn’t drive Master Skywalker insane.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the image he painted. He, Tai, Hennix, and to your surprise, Voe came to mind, a decade younger than they were now, squealing as their feet slid across the patches of ice. And Master Skywalker, futilely trying to reign them in.

“Maybe that’s why he wasn’t keen on coming back,” you said with a scoff.

He chuckled. “Maybe.”

A beat passed before you asked, “How long did it take you to find your crystal?”

Another sigh. “I’ll tell you once you find yours.”

Where you had hoped his answer would provide you with some comfort, you were only left with doubt. What if you couldn’t find one today? Or tomorrow? Or at all?

“Of course you will,” you muttered, watching your position on the holomap as it gently pulsed, showing that you were approaching the end of the tunnel.

The cave ahead was larger than you’d expected. With a ceiling that blended with the hanging darkness, you would’ve thought you’d stumbled upon a rune crafted by ancient men. But the crags and formations embedded in the walls proved otherwise. Water trickled freely down the jagged mineral, echoing throughout the room and filling the space with a fresh fragrance—rather than that of stale air.

Veins of opaque, white crystal ran through the stone walls, and for a moment, you wondered if this was it. There was only one way to find out.

Carefully, you approached a thread, setting the holomap down on a patch of ice. With trembling hands, you peeled a glove off and brushed the surface. The cavern immediately siphoned the warmth from your fingers, turning them numb before you could determine if the ore was made of kyber.

Finally, you conceded. “I don’t feel anything,” you grumbled, working your hand back into the glove.

Ben came to stand behind you, chest pressed flush against your back as his hands slid down your hips. “That’s okay. It’s just quartzite ore.” His breath fanned over your ear. “You’re not the first person to mistake it for kyber, and you won’t be the last, either.”

You spun around, still locked in his embrace. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

He smiled. “We’ve been looking for all of twenty minutes. Don’t give up yet, princess.”

Despite everything—the weight of the unknown, the frost forming within your lungs, the lingering doubts you held about leaving the protection of the Academy—you found yourself savoring this moment. Deep in the heart of Ilum’s caves, wrapped in Ben Solo’s arms, you were content.

The vision of Coruscant appeared in your mind. Of you and him on the balcony overlooking the crowded hyperlanes of the planet home to so much life that it had become life itself. A place where anyone could blend in. Or disappear.

You blinked, wiping away the dream. “What if I never find one?”

Ben raised an eyebrow. “I’d say that’s pretty unlikely. The Empire took what they could, but that doesn’t mean that they were thorough.”

“No. I mean…” You dropped your gaze, holding his hands on your waist. “What if we left now? Before I find a crystal, and before you undergo the Jedi Trials.”

At that, his face fell. “This is your fear talking. You’re not thinking rationally.”

“No, just… listen to me.” You guided yours and his hands over your heart, acutely aware of its relentless pace. “Is this our destiny? To steal moments under the cover of darkness? Away from the eyes of the galaxy?”

Ben was silent for a long moment, his honey eyes searching yours, full of conflict. “What if it is?”

Your breaths mingled, dancing to the tune of your heartbeats. His words told a different story than his heart—the heart you shared.

“I know you don’t believe that,” you said, running a thumb over his rosy cheeks. “So, what’s stopping you?”

He untangled himself from your grasp, raking his fingers through his hair as he paced the room. “I can’t just leave. The galaxy is on the brink of another war—the same war my family dedicated their lives to ending. I’ve spent the last thirteen years working to become a Jedi Knight, to protect the people of the galaxy from conflicts like this.” He pinched the bridge of his aquiline nose, shaking his head lightly. “I’ve come too close to throw it all away now.”

He was right. The galaxy was in jeopardy, its future dependent on the New Republic’s ability to snuff out a fire before it became an inferno. War was likely, and when it came, you both needed to be there to serve the light. To serve justice.

You realized then just how polarized the two of you were. Ben, the son of a Skywalker, burdened with the weight of a legacy imposed upon him from birth. Hailing from a family that ensured he would follow the Jedi path, just as his uncle and grandfather had.

And you, the daughter of a traitor. With no one left to turn to. Whose family legacy was that of deceit and treason.

It was unfair to ask this of him; you knew that. But in the same breath, you couldn’t imagine continuing to live like this.

Before you could apologize, Ben’s hands seized your face, his lips crashing against yours. His kiss felt like a flame breathing oxygen, burning hot and powerful, rendering you senseless.

“But I can’t lose you, either,” he said, resting his forehead on yours. “You are the stars in my sky. Without you, I’d be lost in the dark.”

Your heart skipped at his confession, and yet, words eluded you. The three you’d long wanted to give voice to felt too constrictive. What you shared with him went beyond anything under the definition of love alone. It was so much more than that—a connection that tied you to one another. The Force itself granted you this insight when it bridged your minds, creating the bond you shared. To call it love would be a disservice.

“Then come with me,” you whispered, pulling away to look at him. “It doesn’t have to be today. Just someday. Tomorrow holds endless possibilities for us.”

He pursed his lips as he let out a long breath, leaving you in agonizing suspense as he prepared his answer. “Okay.”

Elated, you reached to cup his face, eager to return the kiss he’d given you moments ago. Except his hands stopped you before you could.

“But only after you’ve finished your training,” he added, hands gliding down your arms. “And when the galaxy doesn’t need our help.”

It was a fair compromise to make—no different from you asking him to leave his life behind. Most of all, it was a compromise you could live with. 

“Promise?” you asked, looking up at him through your lashes.

“I promise.” He breathed the words rather than whispered them, stoking the fire in your chest. Before you could, he closed the distance and kissed you again, more gently this time—perhaps than ever before. It was the manifestation of his word, and yours in return.

When he eventually pulled away, the ghost of his touch lingered, burning through your very soul. A vortex threatened to consume you, chipping away at your rationality, seeking to swallow you whole. But now was not the time. In this moment, you knew what you needed to do, and even if it required the strength of all the stars in the galaxy, you would do it.

You cleared your throat as you reached for the holomap, forcing yourself to be interested in anything other than tearing Ben’s clothes off. “It looks like this path here branches out into three smaller ones.” Using the dial on the base of the map, you magnified the projected image, looking to Ben for reassurance. “We’ll follow it through.”

He nodded. “Lead the way, captain.”

The two of you continued down the cavern’s narrow and winding passages for hours, only stopping when an unexpected gleam of light caught your eye. Out of the twelve times you’d hoped to find kyber, eight were quartzite, with the other four being shards of scrap metal left behind from the Empire’s demolitions. Each disappointment chipped away at your morale, feeding into your belief that you were unworthy of being a Jedi.

Ben must have recognized this as he suggested stopping for a break, digging through his pack for an energy ration. You came to stand beside him, dragging your feet across the ground as if they had turned into blocks of ice.

“Here,” he said, offering you the ration he’d fished out. “You need to eat. This will tie you over until we can get back to the ship.”

“At this rate, that could be days from now.” Your fingers had lost all dexterity as you tried to unwrap the ration, mouth beginning to water at the thought of food. “I just want to go home.”

As you took the first bite, your vision turned white, but only for a fraction of a second. It startled you, causing you to drop the chocolate-coated ration onto the icy floor.

“Hey! Careful with the Endorian cocoa. That stuff’s hard to come by nowadays,” Ben said as a deafening shriek pierced the silence of the caverns. 

You twisted your neck, trying to identify where it originated, heart hammering against your ribs as you lifted a trembling finger to your lips.

Ben grabbed the crook of your arm, turning you to face him. “What are you doing?” His tone was stern, seemingly unfazed by the cry that still echoed through the caves.

You wrested your arm free, lowering your voice to below than a whisper. “Are you deaf? That noise—the scream. We’re not alone.”

“I didn’t hear anything.” His dark eyes were wide, suspicious. “And we are alone. If we weren’t, the holomap would pick up their heat signatures, too.”

You lowered your eyes to the map, finding only yours and Ben’s forms in shades of red and yellow. But before you could consider any logical explanations for the sound, another cry rang through the tunnel, this time coming from the unexplored end of the path. Shrouded in darkness, the path beckoned you, drawing you closer like a magnet. The voice was deep and distorted, yet familiar. You closed off your other senses, focusing only on the voice as it came to clarity. Someone—or something—was calling for you.

“Come to me…” it said, nearly clear enough to be mistaken for another person in the room. “My love.”

Your breath hitched and tears welled in your eyes, rolling down your cold cheeks and onto the exposed fur of your jacket. It was a voice you wouldn’t soon forget.

“M-mom?” you asked, like a child searching for comfort in the night.

Ben stiffened at the word. “Princess, there’s no one else here.” From the volume of his voice, you could tell he was wary. He must have thought you were in a hallucinatory state, and truthfully, you couldn’t blame him.

“I know, but I can hear her calling for me,” you said, voice cracking as you stepped towards her voice. “I have to follow it.”

“No, you don’t.” He reached for you again, pressing the back of his hand to your forehead. “Are you sure you’re feeling okay? Maybe you caught something in the infirmary or–”

“I’m fine,” you snapped, pulling away. “I just… feel like this is something I need to do.”

“Well, you’re not going alone,” Ben insisted, trailing behind you. “I promised Master Skywalker that I would keep you safe, and I can’t do that if we’re separated.”

You ignored him, turning on your heels and reaching into the Force to guide you in the right direction.

Beyond the shadows was another frost-lined chamber, and as you entered, the world around you fell silent. No voices, no footsteps, no ambient drops of water. Only the sound of your breath.

Your boots squeaked on the icy ground as you shifted your weight, glancing back to find Ben. To your surprise—and horror—you found yourself entirely alone. Not only that, but the chamber itself had become something unrecognizable, with no exits and cramped walls.

Panic swelled in your chest and as it did, the ice beneath you gave way, plunging you into dark, freezing water.

You were numb in an instant. Struggling against the weight of your clothes and the fear consuming you, you tried to swim, limbs heavy as bricks as you willed them to move. Unable to process what had happened, your thoughts were overtaken by instinct.

Slowly, you pushed forward, following the only source of light spilling through the black water. With no end in sight, you wondered if you would even make it, lungs growing tight, burning more with each passing second.

The light was pure, preternaturally so, blinding you as you swam into its glow. You resisted the urge to draw a breath, knowing that doing so would only seal your fate. You couldn’t die like this, not now. Not after the promises you’d made in these caves.

As the light engulfed you, you thought of Ben. Where was he? Could he sense that you were on the verge of sinking into oblivion? Would he mourn you when he realized?

With that last question, you used what was left of your energy to call to the Force, pleading for its aid. It wasn’t long before its familiar warmth came to you, an invisible hand grabbing yours and guiding you to the surface. 

As you approached the rippling plane of water, you could hear your name being called, dampened by the roar of blood rushing in your ears. It came again, louder this time, synchronous with your hand breaking through the water.

Cool air kissed your skin, welcoming you back to life. You thrashed at the surface, coughing up the water you’d taken in when you fell, nearly heaving from the force of it. As you opened your burning eyes, you found that the hand holding yours wasn’t invisible at all, but tangible, as real as your own.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” your mother said, lips unmoving as her words permeated the air. “You’re safe now.”

She looked ethereal, a backdrop of white light painting her like a vision of an angel. For a moment, you were sure that you’d arrived in the afterlife, reunited with your mother at long last. It wasn’t until her hand slipped away and yours hit the hard stone floor you realized you weren’t.

The brilliant light vanished along with her presence, leaving you blanketed in darkness. Desperate to escape the freezing water, you clawed at the jagged stone of the opening, mustering the strength to prop yourself up on your elbows. Your nails dug into your palms as you pushed yourself out of the water, crawling only a few inches before falling onto your back, muscles screaming. The layers of wet clothing clung to your skin, sending a violent chill through your bones, but you didn’t care. All you could focus on was your breathing, the sweet sting of air filling your lungs.

The Force lingered around you as you lay there, fists slowly unfurling as the adrenaline waned. As your fingers relaxed, something rolled out of your palm, hitting the wet stone with a soft clink.

Your eyes shot open at the sound. Scrambling to sit up, you searched for the object in the dim light, but it didn’t take you long.

Beside you was a glowing crystal, pulsing with a heartbeat of its own and humming a soft melody attuned to your ears. You blinked in disbelief as you reached for it, tears blurring your vision.

A blue heart of kyber, calling to you.

#jedi: fall order fanfiction if you squint #I love these two idiots so much I can't to break their hearts #ben solo #ben solo x reader #kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x y/n #kylo ren x you #ben solo x fem!reader #ben solo x you #star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars self insert #kylo ren smut #ben solo smut #my writing

[burnwater13]

Rodian child waving at Din Djarin (out of frame) as he flies by the passenger ship in the N-1 starfighter. Image from The Book of Bob Fett, Season 1, Episode 5, Return of the Mandalorian. Calendar from DataWorks.

Grogu hadn’t really thought much about what the Mandalorian did after the Razor Crest was blown to smithereens. He just assumed that that, somehow, the bounty hunter was able to leave Ossus and then get to Tatooine. He’d never really considered what that actually meant. It wasn’t like Ossus was a hot bed of activity and that it had some huge population just waiting around to help stranded travelers.   It was quite the opposite really. So how did he get off that old Jedi marked planet?

When he went over to ask his dad that question, he found Din Djarin busily polishing the surface of the N-1. Grogu liked that this ship was fast, but it wasn’t really comfortable. They’d have to get a different ship when Grogu went through his next growth spurt. His dad already complained about his leg falling asleep when Grogu sat on his lap for too long. And every jump into hyperspace caused that to happen. 

“Hey, buddy, did you come over to help me polish the N-1?”

Grogu fleetingly wondered if there was some sort of Mandalorian badge of honor that you earned when you polished your armor or equipment really well and his dad was just eager for him to earn it. 

He shook his head ‘no’.

“Is it lunch time already?”

Hey! Food wasn’t the only thing Grogu cared about. He cared about accumulating knowledge that he could use to help them both make their way safely in an often cruel and humorless galaxy. Plus, lunchtime was at least a couple of hours away. Grogu could still taste breakfast. He needed to cut back on the hot sauce he used when his dad was cooking Nevarro Surprise. That turned out to be anything he burnt and he cured that nice smooth flavor of carbon with the application of hot sauce. Unfortunately too much hot sauce this time.

Grogu shook his head ‘no’ again.

“Oh. Okay. What’s up, pal?”

The Mandalorian stopped polishing the ship and turned to face Grogu, slinging the polishing cloth over his shoulder as he did so. 

Grogu smiled at his dad and then began to ask his question. He didn’t get very far before he was interrupted again. 

“The Razor Crest? No, I didn’t trade her in for the N-1.”

Grogu shook his head and began to explain again.

“Oh. What did I do without the Razor Crest? Well, that’s pretty simple, I had Peli find me this.”  

Din turned back to the N-1 an polished an imaginary smudge off of its gleaming surface.

This time Grogu used Gal Basic to express himself. His dad did not appreciate the effort.

“Grogu, I’ve told you, we only use Dank Farrik when there is a good reason to use it. Not liking the answer to a question is not a good reason.”

Really? As Grogu thought back to the various times he’d heard his dad use the mild exclamation it was almost always in response to an answer he didn’t like. 

Grogu scuffed at the dirt as he turned to stomp away.

“Now buddy, no reason to get all huffy. What’s your question again?”

Grogu explained, for the third time, in slow, easy to follow sign language, that he wanted to know how Din Djarin, Mandalorian bounty hunter, best in the Outer Rim, got off Ossus and ended up back on Tatooine, without a ship.

“Thank you for explaining your question more completely this time. Fett gave me a ride.”

Then the Mandalorian went back to polishing the N-1 and Grogu knew there was only one thing he could do to get his dad’s attention and the whole story. 

He walked away from the N-1 with his ears drooping down, scuffing a small pebble and sniffing like he was crying. The sensors in the Mandalorian’s helmet were really good at picking up on tears, burps, and swearing. Grogu knew that from experience. 

He was almost back to their cabin when his dad scooped him up from the ground and began to check him out. 

“Well, I don’t see any cuts or bruises. There was nothing on the path that scared you. What’s with the tears?”

Grogu shook his head. He wasn’t going to explain anything to a person who would’t explain anything to him. 

“Oh, I see. You’re pouting because I didn’t tell you a long winded story about all sorts of people you’ve never met and you’re never likely to meet. Nothing really special happened while I was between ships. I had to take a public transport. They took all of my weapons. Or at least they thought they did. I sat next to a nice Rodian family. Their little one was very curious and reminded me of you. Then Peli found me the N-1 and she and I worked on fixing her up until you showed up on Tatooine again. What I remember most about that time was missing you, so that’s the story. Can I do anything else for you?”

Grogu grinned at his dad and gave him a hug and nodded his head. 

“Okay. Let me guess. Now you want that meal you like to eat between breakfast and lunch?”

Wow! Din Djarin got that right in one try. Grogu would just have to keep working with him. He was definitely improving and that’s what mattered. 

#calendar prompt a day #din djarin #grogu #the book of boba fett

[fleeting-sanity]

Finalize

[ Previous Entry ] ⚜ [ Read @ Ao3 ] ⚜ [ Chapter Index ]

His heart felt like it was exploding. Joy, anxiety, and pride raced in tandem with his body language upon hearing the news. The very next day, his pregnant wife started glowing in his eyes. Her beauty acquired a new method of controlling his mind–as apparent by how his hands couldn’t stop caressing her face and growing belly. A slice of heaven from the past.

But he was raised in a dog eat dog world and naturally, the fear gained momentum in the race. How much longer until they couldn’t hide her appearance? Thinking far ahead, what would the child be growing up in times of war and clashing ideologies? 

A decade of that was taken away by her, a fact that Rionnic kept coming back to, thus stoking the mellowing anger again. Recalling how she’d further hurt him by telling Rian the truth about their relationship added fuel to the fire. He returned to Odessen when the afternoon ended.

But he found neither his wife or son there. Asking around yielded nothing. His calm demeanor progressively crumbled as both never returned his calls. It felt like that familiar dread all over again during the first days of her abandonment. Imagine the shock when a hand landed on his shoulder at the peak of his tension. “Red?”

“Did you have to startle me that way?!”

His twin was taken aback by his explosive response. Both of their faces changed within seconds after the fact. “I… called you a few times but you seemed to be in a trance. Are you alright?”

Rionnic deflated into his seat, raking his hair with a frustrated sigh. Immediately the remorse hit for having raised his voice towards his brother. A far cry to the enemy he once was. “I didn’t mean to yell…”

“I know... I heard you’ve been asking for Jaesa? I just got a message from Ria informing me about their whereabouts. She sent them to Ossus. They’ll be back soon.”

The look of relief on Rionnic’s face was apparent, but it quickly turned into frowning when there were no such messages after he checked his holo transmitter. “Why did none of them inform me…?”

Such a difficult question, despite the simplicity of how it sounded. Perhaps it was a denial from Rionnic’s side despite knowing the answer deep down. Riornivo however, was put in an awkward position. He displayed an abashed smile, offering his shallow reassurance. “Maybe they don’t want to interrupt your busy schedule. Red…” as the younger brother took a seat in front of him, shuffling his brain for ways to break into his walls. He could sense Rionnic’s anxiety even before he landed in Odessen. “I’m thinking of what to give Rian for his birthday soon. I know he loves geology but giving him more rocks seems pointless. What about you?”

Rionnic sensed the ulterior motive behind those words. But he wouldn’t turn down a conversation about his son. “Still not sure myself. Probably a new apparel,” Rionnic replied calmly.

“That’s a great idea! Hmm… oh! Maybe I’ll make him a custom holocron! Yes!”

Riornivo’s enthusiasm scratched an endearment spot in him, but he would rather be caught dead first before expressing it to his annoying twin. “Spit it out.”

“What?”

“You want to say something.”

The Jedi couldn’t continue feigning cluelessness before it irked the Sith. “Red, you know I love you. I don’t mean to be nosy but I’ve been noticing your emotions lately. If you don’t want me to do anything, I won’t. But who knows, it might make you feel better telling it to someone.”

Riornivo braced for his twin’s reaction. 

“Are you willing to push this?” Rionnic taunted in a semi-playful way.

“To help you? Yes.” Riornivo answered with just as much familiarity and connection, albeit in a different way. His persistence seemed to pay off as Rionnic looked like he was in deep thought. 

“Fine. I think I need some time off. After dealings in Zakuul are done, I’m loading the rest to you. The bar is high.”

“Yessir–uh, Your Majesty!”

That playful response made Rionnic groan dismissively. “Then get to work.”

Rionnic had contemplated spilling his heart out to his twin, but decided against it. His pride would take a hit for airing his marriage issues out, and he preferred to solve this by himself. The office was emptied once more as he glanced at the picture on the desk. Just the three of them, smiling on Rishi. It caused his mind to wander off, thinking deeper into all of the troubles in this paradise.

The love he had for Rian would be incomplete if he were to break his heart by breaking his mother’s. Being Sith undoubtedly carried the default and already proven resentment in the boy’s heart, and he wouldn’t want to worsen that by tarnishing his image. But he knew Rian could sense his bitterness towards Jaesa. 

Which took Jaesa by surprise when Rian asked her a thinly veiled question about his father.

“Mother… are you angry at father?”

She wanted to say it was the opposite instead, but had to choose her words carefully. 

“Why is that? Did he… did he say something to you?”

“No. I just noticed both of your faces when you were talking to each other,” said the boy nonchalantly while swinging his legs over the bench. “You’re not mad at each other, right?”

It pained her to have to lie to her son. She hooked an arm around his back, pulling him into a hug. Perhaps this would be the right time to have that difficult talk, being in a familiar place and away from Rionnic. The hurdle was how would she phrase the words–she considered framing it from the point of Jedi teachings against attachments, but that would be hypocritical of her, and it felt a little too permanent . There was always a flicker of hope that perhaps someday, Rionnic would lower his defenses for her.

“Rian… can I ask you something?” to which the boy nodded.

“Alright… um…” 

Jaesa stroked Rian’s hair in an attempt to soothe herself. The longer he waited for his mother to continue, the more uncomfortable he became. “Sorry, um… I want to know… if you’d be fine if-if your father and I go our separate ways?”

“What do you mean…?”

“When someday we are not together anymore. None of us would be going anywhere–we’d still be next to you all the time! But your father and I would no longer be, um-”

“You’re angry at father?” said Rian defiantly while releasing himself from his mother’s embrace.

“N-no, this is just a hypothetical question!” 

Rian raised a perplexed eyebrow, mixed with mild annoyance. “Then why would you not be together? Is that what happens when people stop loving each other? Do you not love father anymore?”

Jaesa took a moment to rearrange her method of delving deeper into this topic. To educate from a place of understanding and love must be performed with serenity. “My little knight, of course I love your father very much. I’m sorry if I’ve upset you.” 

“Then don’t ask such questions anymore. It’s not an appropriate one for a child!” Rian lectured while waving his finger around, his tone hurt yet commanding. He huffed away towards a building that used to be the former Jedi archives. The talk went about as well as Jaesa expected.

After saying goodbye to the familiar faces of Ossus, Rian continued both his silence and pouting during the journey back to Odessen. Jaesa decided to not push her luck, giving her son space and perhaps trying again in the near future with a different approach. Both of their holocoms suddenly pinged multiple missed calls, all from Rionnic. It appeared that Ossus was having signal problems again. Rian immediately redialed his father.

“Rian! Rian… are you alright? Where are you?” 

“Calm down, father. I’m on my way back. I’ll talk to you again once I arrive!” To which Rionnic responded by expressing his relief. Rian’s silence persisted over the rest of the trip. His mother, however, was bracing herself for her husband’s response to this failed attempt. He would probably gloat about how he was right or admonish her for hurting Rian’s feelings. Once the shuttle landed, Rian quickly undid his seatbelt and bolted out, seeking his dear father. Jaesa took her time, not showing any signs of urgency.

“Father!” Rian shouted while knocking rapidly on his office door. He was greeted with the sight of Rionnic talking to a raven-haired man with a pale complexion who seemed somewhat recognizable to him. The other person was Lady Beniko. 

“I understand. You may leave.” Rionnic dismissed both of his subordinates.

Rian skittered towards Rionnic as he kneeled, greeting him with a hug. The tightness of Rian’s grasp was indicative of his state of mind, confirmed by his expression when he released the hug. 

“How was your day, good Sir?”

“Hm… it was okay. Tonight it might improve. Oh, by the way, I just saw some of my friends in Ossus! I’m sorry I couldn’t invite you there, father, but I’ll make sure of it next time!”

“That’s good to hear-”

“Oh, and I think Ossus had a signal problem again! That’s why I didn’t pick up your calls.” “Don’t worry about it, as long as you’re safe. Have you eaten?”

Before the boy could answer, the mother entered the room with her eyes downcast, but now her hair was done in an updo. Rian’s posture tensed upon seeing her as he scooted closer towards Rionnic’s body, refusing to look Jaesa’s way. “Yeah… I ate lunch at Ossus.”

“Good, good. You know what? I took a few days off, so I’m quite free to do many things with you,” Rionnic said to attempt to ease the atmosphere. “How about that trip to Alderaan?”

“Wow! I’d love to! But… that means I’d have to skip class.”

“I’ll have a talk with Sana-Rae. Unless you say otherwise? It’s up to you. We can go anytime you want.”

Rian took a moment to think, then his eyes glanced at Jaesa who was still speechless. She shrugged, giving the final say to him with a passing smile. 

“Yes, please!”

Rionnic affirmed with a grin, reinforcing his pitch with the grand castles of Alderaan being a sight to behold. He knew Rian would be curious about the caves, and that was something he’d have to do a little research on; to find the one with the least amount of Killik. It has been a long time since he returned home. The padawan excused himself to meet his friends, leaving the parents alone and in silence, again.

Jaesa turned to leave, never meeting Rionnic’s eyes.

“Wait.”

Again? She thought. Her weary heart wanted to continue walking, but her memory flashed to Rionnic’s previous words of preferring to communicate their problems away. She turned to face him with a determined glint in her eyes. The physical distance acted as a buffer between them.

“Did you talk to him about…”

She waited for him to continue, which unnerved him.

“Well, did you?” Rionnic repeated with an increased volume.

“Sure, why not? Anything else you want to know?”

Silence. It was as if Jaesa knew how to push his buttons, easily controlling the atmosphere and minimizing his authority. His pride refused to back down however, blurting out whatever sentence without much of a thought. “Why did he seem upset? What did you say?”

Predictable words to which Jaesa had already prepared for. 

“It’s natural that he’s upset. He will understand eventually. I spoke as softly as I can, and I know it’s going to hurt him regardless. Give him some time–I’m the one who raised him after all.”

Hurtful as it was to hear, confusion was the stronger emotion currently infecting Rionnic. He hated the potential outcome of this conversation, wanting to prevent it yet he was prevented by not knowing how to articulate it. And by the hurt. Before he could speak further, Jaesa added to her stinger sentences.

“Red… I think I want some distance from you when it doesn’t concern Rian. If possible, I want to finalize it by filing. I promise I won’t ever keep him away from you.”

A masterful final blow to his ego. The figurative walls crumbling could be seen by the subtle change in his posture. He mustered the last bit of emotional strength left. “Come closer.”

He displayed that same look a decade ago, strong and stoic, yet enticing. But she refused to take a dent to her defenses. She calmly approached him, their eyes trained on each other. There was a few seconds of wordless tension, and for the first time in his life where he was scared to speak his mind. Had circumstances been different, perhaps they would have been doing more than just locking eyes.

“Do you really mean that?” His voice subdued and lower pitched. “Repeat your words. Confirm it to me.”

She could sense the desperation. “You heard me clearly the first time. It’s the same thing you wanted months ago–I’ve come to agree that it’s for the best...” as she lowered her gaze, preparing to extract herself from the situation. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I still have errands to run. Force be with you.”

A common parting gesture throughout the galaxy, sounding so distant and hollow. Internally, he was pulling hair over how she turned those familiar terms into such a foreign concept. The way she detached effortlessly was probably credited to her Jedi training, but he refused to believe that someone could quit loving another abruptly. How did it get to this? The image of his shattered family was on the horizon. 

His chest became progressively heavier as he stared at the family picture. Was that the beginning of the end?

#swtor #swtor oc #swtor fic #swtor fanfic #fanfic #jaesa willsaam #sith warrior #jaesa x sith warrior #star wars oc #swtor fanart #my art

[polyphonical]

Dragon's Head - Interval - Chapter 1

[ View on site for better experience♪ ]

Location: Downtown

〈A few days later〉

Kuro: Tetsu. Have ya finished shoppin’ yet?

Tetora: Ossu! Thank you for comin’ with me! Thanks to you, I was able to finish everythin’ I needed to do ssu. Are there any places you wanted to go to, Taishou?

Kuro: Me? Nah, I don’t need anythin’. I just wanted to come along for the walk.

Tetora: I see ssu. Then, where should we go nowーー Hm? Hmm~?

Ah, somethin’ smells super good ssu! Ugh, I just got so hungry, I couldn’t help but drool…

Kuro: Smells good…? Now thatcha say it, there is some kinda sweet smell floatin’ around.

Is that taiyaki [1]? Ah, it looks like it’s comin’ from that food truck over there.

Tetora: ! Taiyaki! I love Taiyaki ssu! They’re super delicious ssu!

Kuro: Oh yeah, I think my lil’ sister said somethin’ like this was happenin’. That there was a stylish taiyaki shop that’s only open for a limited time downtown somewhere.

Tetora: Stylish? Is there a thing such as stylish taiyaki ssu?

Like is it not the normal fish shape? Maybe it’s a dressed-up fish? I dunno, I don’t think it matters if it’s dressed up or not. I think people would just eat it anyways…

Kuro: I think ya got the wrong idea of what stylish means.

In this case, I think they’re usin’ stylish to describe the fillin’. Normally, it’d be red bean paste fillin’ or cream fillin’, but this place ‘s sellin’ a variety of different ones.

It could be somethin’ as light as a dessert or as heavy as a light meal. Like how there’s different versions of crepes [1] with various ingredients.

My lil’ sister says they’re really popular ‘cuz they’re like a taiyaki restaurant with how many different varieties they have.

I think she recommended the ham and cheese one…?

Tetora: Ham and cheese! I love ham, cheese, and taiyaki ssu! ♪

Kuro: If ya like them so much, why don’t we buy some and go eat somewhere? I haven’t had lunch yet so I was just startin’ to get hungry.

Tetora: Ossu! Yeah, let’s do that!

Kuro: Tetsu, here.

Tetora: Thank you ssu! Uumyu. I wanna eat right now, but I dunno if I want to eat standin’ right here. It’s a holiday, so it’s kinda crowded…

Kuro: That’s trye. We should go somewhere else.

Tetora: Ah. Then, should we go eat at the riverbank ssu?

Like, we used to go eat food at the riverbank after we finished club activities, right? It’d have a lotta places to sit down, and it’s warm, so it’d be nice to go there ssu.

Kuro: Ohh, that’s right. Nice idea, Tetsu.

Location: Firefly Riverbank

Kuro: Man, it’s been a while since we’ve been here huh.

Tetora: Ah, Taishou! I think this bench here is free ssu!

……Alright! Then, thank you for this meal~! Chew chew……♪

Mmm~! The sweetness of the dough and the savoriness of the ham and cheese go so well together…!

I always thought of taiyaki as somethin’ like a dessert, but somethin’ like this could be a meal!

I hope they add more meat options to the menu next time~ Like kalbi [2] taiyaki!

Which taiyaki did you get, Taishou?

Kuro: Hm? Me? I just got the normal bean paste one.

Tetora: Ehh? After seein’ all those options, you got the normal one? Why?

Kuro: ‘s just a personal preference of mine to get the kind I’m used to durin’ these kinds of things.

Besides, my lil’ sister brings home a lotta food from “stylish” places. Gettin’ to eat the normal version of foods is more rare than not. ‘s nice to have after a while.

Tetora: I see ssu. Well, it’s very Taishou-like to pick somethin’ normal like that. Chew chew…

Oh yeah, I haven’t heard anything from Tenshouin-senpai since everythin’ went down. What ended up happenin’ with the project ssu?

Kuro: I dunno. From the way Tenshouin was actin’ before, it must be hard to have to a lotta different obligations.

Tetora: Right ssu. That’s why it’s so hard to get in touch with Anego too…

Since Tomoya-kun and I were the ones who found the weekly magazine, we’ve been wonderin’ what was goin’ on.

I wish there was a way I could help out.

Kuro: To do that, ya have to come up with a plan that’s good for both agencies, somethin’ that works with the management, and somethin’ that changes the fans opinions who are strugglin’ with the whole issue.

That bein’ said… I’m not that good with variety type shit to begin with.

Tetora: Hm~………

────────────────· · · · · ·♡· · · · · · ────────────────

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Here's what taiyaki are and what crepes are ! I want some now (never had them ever ) .

This is what kalbi is! It's also Tetsu's fave food , so ofc he wanted to try some kalbi taiyaki . i think i wanna try this one the most actually

#ensemble stars #enstars #ensemble stars translation #enstars translation #polyphonical #kuro kiryu #tetora nagumo #dragon's head

[commander-krios]

R & R

Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Archiban "Doc" Kimble/f!Jedi Knight, f!Jedi Knight & Theron Shan Rating: Teen Summary: Theron plans some elaborate gift for Katona after the capture of Darth Malgus, as a way to give his Commander and best friend a chance to relax. Somehow, he ropes Doc into it. Words: 4160 Additional Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Friendship, SWTOR Summer Gift Exchange, Fluff, Humor, Love, Established Relationship, Banter, Teasing, Background Lana/Theron

Written as a gift for @sealeneee for the SWTOR Summer Gift Exchange <3

Read on AO3

Doc was a man of many talents, most of those being of the medical variety, but he knew what he was good at and made the best of what he wasn’t. He could field stitch a wound under heavy blaster fire. He cured diseases that most people gave up on. He saved civilians while pretending to be an Imperial and almost lost his head for it.

And despite all of the years they’d spent apart, Doc was somehow married to a Jedi.

Even now, when Katona was at the head of a neutral organization, working tirelessly to see her grand plans for the galaxy come to fruition, some nights spent at the desk in her room, pouring over datapads and flimsi like he had once upon a time, she still managed to squeak in time with him. And he was humbled by it. 

But ever since the reemergence of Malgus, ever the wily Sith, Katona’s time seemed less available and the free time she did have was spent in tense silence. There were nights he’d fall asleep alone, waking the next morning to find her side of the bed hadn’t been touched. It was almost starting to feel like before, when he thought she was dead. And he didn’t like the way it made him feel.

The medical bay was silent, Elara Dorne working through paperwork while Doc restocked their supplies. It was usually him and Elara there most days. Sometimes Tharan Cedrax would show to aid them, especially during the days when they had wellness checks or a recent battle with many injured. Unfortunately, those days were steadily increasing, thanks to Malgus.

With a sigh, he closed the cupboard, only noticing that they were no longer alone. Katona’s advisor was standing in the doorway, eyes squinting against the brightness of the room. 

Theron Shan. 

Elara noticed him nearly at the same time, pretty blue eyes widening at the sight of the former SIS turned double agent turned whatever the hell he was now. “Agent Shan, what can I do for you?”

Theron’s eyes glanced in Doc’s direction and he immediately had an unsettling feeling in his gut. Something had happened. 

Theron rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, turning back to Elara with a tense smile. “I need to speak to Doc, if that’s alright.”

Worry creased her brow, but she didn’t ask questions. Elara knew when it was needed and when it wasn’t. And at this moment, it was important for her to remember decorum. “Of course. Will I need to call in anyone to replace him for the day?”

Theron nodded, his mouth turning into a grim line. “That’d be best. Thank you, Elara.”

A few minutes later, Doc followed Theron out of the medbay, not exactly looking forward to whatever secret conversation was about to take place. There were many things they could be about, but the most likely reason was Katona. About his wife. That didn’t sit right with him, he’d barely spoken two words to Theron since he’d arrived, even knowing that Katona and Theron had a friendship that bordered on a sibling rivalry. He never fit into their dynamic.

And in truth, he never wanted to. Katona had found a friend to rely on, to confide in, much like Doc had Kira, Scourge, Nadia and the other Jedi for years on Ossus. He wasn’t going to ruin a friendship when that’s all it was. He couldn't help the jealousy he felt at knowing this man beside him had been beside Katona for well over six years: fighting by her side, protecting her, helping her build something amazing. Theron had even protected her from assassins by risking his own life when Doc couldn’t. He’ll forever be grateful for it.

But even now that they’d reunited, Theron saw more of Katona than he did.

“What happened?” He asked before the door had even hissed behind them.

Theron sighed, rubbing the spot near his implant, exhaustion creating dark circles under his eyes. Katona wasn’t the only one not sleeping it seemed. “Katona… is not well. She won’t admit it, but she can barely stand straight anymore, or keep her eyes open. I don’t think she’s slept in days, Doc.”

“The stress is going to kill her.” It wasn’t an overblown reaction, it was fact. If she didn’t relax, get some rest, or even do something that didn’t involve a life or death situation, she’d never be able to continue on. If the exhaustion didn’t kill her outright, it would get her killed on the battlefield. And Doc didn’t spend the last handful of years searching for her to lose her again.

“If an Imp doesn’t first.” Theron walked with him down into the military hanger, watching as soldiers prepped for deployment or spies raced to deliver their reports. Sometimes he couldn’t tell the difference between them, even with years working alongside them. “No matter what I say, she’s too stubborn to let someone else do the work.”

“That sounds like her.” Doc smiled despite himself, glad to see some things never changed. “If you have suggestions, I’m all ears. I haven’t seen her in days , at least.”

The cold sheets of their bed mocked him.

“I, uh, was thinking of setting something up.” Theron glanced at him with a sheepish smile, clearly embarrassed by his train of thoughts. “Like a fake mission. Something that she can’t say no to, but once she gets there, it’s something that forces her to chill out.”

Doc raised an eyebrow. “You know if she finds out it was a lie, she’ll probably kick your ass.”

“I’m not afraid of her.” Theron told him, rolling his eyes.

“Keep telling yourself that.”

Theron snorted, but Doc could see his hesitation. She sometimes still scared Doc and they slept together. Katona was… well, she was something else. “Listen, we can blame it on Lana. It’s something she would do, right? Lie to get the Commander to rest. Without Katona at her best, Lana can’t do her job.”

Doc chuckled, stopping at the end of the landing pad, eyes glancing out over the beautiful Odessen scenery. He always was struck with amazement at the things the galaxy held that were untouched by human hands. He hoped there was more out there to be discovered. Because he was never tired of seeing it. “You can try, but Lana might kill you first.”

Theron let out something close to a laugh, leaning against the crude wall built into the side of the mountain. “You may have a point. Thankfully, Lana likes me enough to not do that sort of thing.”

Doc’s mouth twitched with a grin, nodding the way they’d come from. “You’re sure of that?”

With a frown, Theron glanced at the entrance of the military hanger, cringing at the sight of the pretty blonde Sith Lord… who did not look pleased.

“Theron Shan!” She snapped at the sight of him, heading in their direction with determination and maybe a little bit of anger. Ok, a lot of anger. “ When were you going to tell me about this?”

Theron winced as if she’d slapped him. “Lana, I can explain."

“Really?” The datapad in her hands nearly cracked with the amount of pressure she squeezed it with. “Please, go on. Tell me why you thought renting a pleasure barge was an appropriate use of funds.”

Doc’s eyebrows disappeared into his hairline. “You did what? ”

Theron sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s for Katona.”

Silence met their words, neither Doc nor Lana knowing where to even start with that .

“It-” Theron groaned, running his hands down his face. “It’s not going to be full of dancers or anything like that. The entire ship is set up for a fight simulation. To help train the Republic military during wartime.”

Lana stared at him in open suspicion, clearly not believing a single word out of his mouth. “Is that so?”

Theron grimaced. Oh so there was more. “There are also slot machines, gambling tables, a dance floor with good music. I think this one has a masseuse and swimming pool.”

“And you used Alliance funding for this?” She repeated, golden eyes nearly burning a hole through the man. Doc had to admit, Lana Beniko was terrifying, even for a Sith Lord. He’s just glad that he’s not the one who screwed up this time.

“Well, Katona is the Alliance Commander-”

“ Theron .”

With a quiet sigh, Doc knew this was why Theron had asked for his help in the first place. To smooth things over, to give the plan a little more viability in the eyes of Lana, and quite possibly Katona. Because neither were going to be happy about the deception, and Doc was well known for being able to make things a little less serious.

“While Theron probably should’ve ran it by you, Katona clearly needs a break. A way to blow off steam. We can work with this. Write it off as a training exercise.”

“That’s… not how this works.” Lana let out a breath, something that could be considered a sigh from anyone else. “ Fine . But when she finds out how much money went into this-”

“She won’t.” Theron assured her and Lana slanted her eyes at him.

“She will . And she will also know that it was you who spent it.” Lana smiled at him thinly. “I’m not the person who is going to cover for you when you screw up, no matter what our relationship might imply.”

Theron laughed nervously, looking at Doc for help. He only shrugged in response, not intending to get involved in that. Not when his own wife was going to be looking for blood later on.

~~~~

The shuttle lifted off a few hours later, Katona hovering behind Theron as he piloted it away from Odessen and in the direction of the pleasure barge where her simulated mission waited. A mission that she thought was a real one, with Imperials who had kidnapped a group of civilians from Dantooine. And Doc felt terrible for lying to her, but he was right about her stress levels. She needed to blow off some steam, get a relaxing massage, and do whatever else her heart desired.

He hated seeing her so worn out.

Those months during their hunt for the Emperor had been the first time Doc saw Katona crack under the pressure, the responsibilities. He didn’t want to ever see her like that again.

Once their heading was set, she moved farther back into the seating area, plopping down next to him with a groan. Stretching her legs out, she crossed her arms over her chest and glanced at him, hesitation in her gaze.

When he looked at her, he couldn’t help the smile spread across his own face despite the clear exhaustion that haunted her eyes. “What’s wrong, gorgeous? Never seen a man so handsome?”

“If I said no, would you start quoting poetry? You’ve already gotten me into bed, you know. And tied me down with that ridiculous wedding you concocted. You don’t need to try so hard anymore.” Her eyes still glowed slightly in the dim interior of the shuttle, but they softened as she watched him. 

He chuckled, feeling some relief at how relaxed she was. Even over eight years after meeting her, she still surprised him. “I’ll never stop wooing you, beautiful.”

Katona rolled her eyes, but he could see the beginnings of a real grin on her face. “And I’ll never stop making fun of you for it.”

Her hand slipped into his and squeezed slightly, her eyes on the window of the shuttle as they approached the barge. Doc felt a thrill of excitement in his gut. He wasn’t sure what her reaction was going to be when she found out that this was a setup, but he was so glad to have her here, with him , and to see that she was ready to kick ass. He never tired of seeing the fire in her eyes, or watching her on the battlefield. 

Or holding her close when all was calm in the galaxy.

“I’m glad you’re here, Doc.” She said, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, the smile finally curling her full lips. “I miss this .”

He heard what she didn’t say. She missed him and damn it, he missed her so much it sometimes hurt. “You miss listening to me scream during a firefight?”

“Among the other times you scream.”

Theron coughed suddenly from the pilot seat and Doc smirked, enjoying watching Katona’s best friend squirm in his seat. 

“What’s wrong, Theron?” Katona asked, clearly enjoying his discomfort as well. “Lana doesn’t make you squeal?”

The flush went from his face probably all the way to the tips of his toes. “That’s… none of your business.”

“I guess that’s a yes.” She murmured, snorting before her gaze shifted back to his. “But really, it’s been lonely without you around. For the last few years, I’ve wondered where you were. If you were alive. It sucked not knowing. Not a feeling I care to have again.”

“Is that why you’ve thrown me in the medbay with Elara? To keep me safe?” He should be annoyed by that, but found that he didn’t care about the reasons if it meant that Katona always kept him in the back of her mind.

“That wasn’t my decision. Lana felt your work with Nadia and the Jedi was more important to continue than forcing you into a combat situation.”

“I’d follow you anywhere, beautiful. Even into the depths of hell. You know that.”

Katona rolled her eyes, but she didn’t let go of his hand, her smile never slipping from her face. It was a nice break, sitting here with his wife, even if they were going to be fighting a bunch of droids soon. He wished the galaxy would give them more moments like this, where they can be nothing but Katona and Doc. Where they didn’t need to save everyone all of the time.

“We’re landing. Get ready.” Theron called from the pilot’s seat, putting the shuttle into autopilot. 

Katona squeezed his hand before letting go. “Like old times?”

“Not quite.” Doc responded and with a grin, he met her curious gaze. “But it’s better. Because I’m with you.”

Katona wasn’t the type to blush, but he swore he saw a hint of pink on her cheeks. “Flattery gets you nowhere with me, Doc.”

“It’s not flattery if it’s true, gorgeous.”

She laughed and his heart squeezed at the sound. “You’re also a terrible liar.”

Shaking his head, he followed her to the exit, knowing that the playful banter was over. Katona had a mission to complete and she would see it through no matter what. Theron joined them a moment later, double checking his blasters. Doc grabbed his medical kit, securing it to his back even though he doubted they would need it. Not a single droid was going to stand up against Alliance Commander Katona.

His feet touched the metal grating as he jumped from their shuttle onto the barge, steps echoing as he pulled his own small blaster, eyes darting around the dark landing pad, seeing nothing but grey durasteel and a few shuttles. No people. No droids. No movement. Nothing.

“It’s too quiet.” Theron muttered, glancing in the opposite direction. 

Doc almost snorted, but managed to hold it in. An actor Theron Shan was not . “We have a Jedi here. I’m sure she’ll have no issue warning us-”

“Duck!” Katona shouted, pulling her lightsabers from their spots on her belt, igniting both simultaneously, the white crystals glowing eerily against the barge’s grey interior.

Doing as he was told, Doc huddled near a shuttle that wasn’t the Alliance’s, blaster fire aimed at him leaving burns in the hull. Katona threw herself into the fray with no regards to her safety, only intent on destroying her enemy. Her lightsabers slashed in a wide arc, severing the head from the closest droid in a shower of sparks. She spun, shoving one of the swords into the one beside it, leaving a burning hole in its middle.

Ducking another blaster bolt, he lifted his own weapon, firing on the droids that appeared out of a side door, aiming their shots at Katona. She turned again, deflecting the shots before jumping into the group of them, swinging her lightsaber in a circle and cutting them in half.

With as aggressively as Katona fought, the battle was over in a few minutes, nothing but sparks and smoking electronics left of their foes. The shuttles in the landing bay didn’t fare as well as Doc had hoped although their shuttle took the least amount of damage. Whoever was here partying was definitely going to need someone to repair the ships before they could leave.

Katona returned to his side, checking to make sure he wasn’t injured before doing the same for Theron. Once they were certain of their health, the men followed the Jedi into the hallway, door shutting behind them with a whoosh of finality. 

“Theron, did you have the schematics for this place?” Katona asked, eyes peering into the darkness ahead, voice quiet but determined.

“It’s built like any other pleasure barge. Uh, not that I know.” He finished quickly. Katona completely ignored him, holding her lightsaber out like a glowrod, trying to light her path. “The hallway leads to a few side rooms where guests can sleep, a medbay, a dining room, before it leads directly to the main area.”

“And the prisoners? Where would they be kept?”

Doc rubbed the back of his neck, feeling like someone or something was watching them. “Probably in slave cages. Those would be near the private dancing rooms. Off of the main section.”

She only glanced at him, not bothering to ask how he knew about the slave cages. Because she knew him… knew of his dangerous missions against the Empire. Knew that he was going to do anything to save people from being subjected to the evils of slavery and other awful tortures at the hands of the Sith.

And he always would, until they finally killed him. Because the people… they didn’t deserve to suffer.

“Ok, so we know where we’re going.” Katona said instead, turning away to continue on through the darkness. “Let’s go.”

They met several more waves of droids on their path, Katona making quick work of each of them. Theron threw Doc a glance at once point, concern etched on his features, eyes full of worry. This was too easy. Katona was going to suspect something was up if they didn’t have some type of challenge.

The waves of droids were supposed to get progressively more difficult the better you did in the simulation. It didn’t appear that it could keep up with Katona’s aggressive fighting style. Sooner than they wanted, they stood outside the large double doors that led to the main room of the pleasure barge.

Katona’s eyes trailed over him briefly, softening when she realized he was unharmed. “Be careful in there, both of you.”

“That I can do, Commander.” Theron replied, checking his blasters once more, ready to finish this.

Doc smiled at his wife, wrapping a hand around her wrist, thumb brushing gently against the skin there. “Let’s go, beautiful.”

The door opened, strobe lights hitting them in shades of green and gold, lighting up the inside of the room more so than the dim orange lights that hung overhead. A group of droids hung near one of the sabacc tables, no prisoners in sight. Thankfully, there was most likely no actual group of prisoners. Just droids and the people who ran the simulations.

A large droid approached, flanked by a few of the smaller droids they’d been fighting along the way. It didn’t attempt to talk, to negotiate, to do anything but lift the barrel of its weapon and fire. Theron rolled out of the way, ducking behind one of the slot machines near the entrance, a blaster bolt nearly hitting him.

Katona shifted in front of Doc, lightsaber deflecting the attacks as they backed up quickly. Doc crawled under a table, ripping the medpak from its spot on his back and keeping it ready to go. Then he fired at the smaller of the droids from his new cover, giving Katona the opening she needed to slice through the enemy.

He managed to hit it in the power coupling, frying its circuitry and it dropped into a pile on the ground, the droid behind stopping momentarily to deal with the new obstacle. Katona’s lightsaber left her hand, cutting the droid in half before launching herself at the largest of them, catching the saber in midair. 

The droid turned as she landed in front of it, ducking the moment it aimed its guns at her. Theron was keeping the other droids busy, his blasters doing considerable damage. Doc cursed, praying that the droid had its guns on stun, not kill, and tried to get a decent shot in.

None came, but it wasn’t needed. Katona spun on her heels, lightsabers leaving arcs of white light behind as she slashed the droid to pieces, a ferocity that was simultaneously beautiful and terrifying. A few seconds passed in silence, the droids sparking until they finally shut down with a groan. 

Theron left the safety of his cover at the same time as Doc, watching the droids for any sign of movement. Once they seemed to be in the clear, he turned just in time to see a group of men approaching, all wearing fine clothing and smiling brightly.

The man in the lead clapped his hands excitedly, grinning from ear to ear. “Dear Commander! I hope you enjoyed my simulation. I must admit, I didn’t expect you to breeze through it as easily as you did.”

“What?” She glanced at the man, who was even shorter than Doc, her eyes slanting in suspicion. Her gaze swept over him, taking in everything about him in seconds. “What are you talking about?”

“The simulation? Your friends contacted me about it a few weeks ago.” The man puffed himself up, gripping the front of his jacket, looking like he was about to burst from the size of his ego. “I hope you enjoyed yourself.”

“I…” She trailed off, unsure of how to respond, glare wavering. “Sure, it was great.”

The man smiled, although it seemed he was waiting for some kind of bowing and praise. “Well, I hope you enjoy our hospitality, Commander. There is much fun left to be had.”

When the men disappeared to finish prepping the “relaxation” portion of her gift, she glanced at them.

“This was a set up?” She asked, eyebrows lowering, a look of frustration on her face. “Why?”

“We thought you needed a break. Something to blow off steam before some relaxation. You deserve it. Everything with Malgus… it’s running you into the ground.” Theron rubbed the back of his neck, eyes nervously flickering between Katona and Doc. “Doc agrees.”

“I agreed that she needed a break, but I’m not the one who spent millions of credits setting this up.”

“And Lana? I assume she already threatened you within an inch of your life.”

Theron chuckled nervously, eyes dropping to his feet. “Yeah. But she thinks you need a rest too, Katona. You work too hard.”

“We’ve barely seen each other since I joined your Alliance. It might be selfish, but I missed you.” Doc lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to her wrist. A smirk curled her lips. “Are you angry?”

She rolled her eyes, huffing a laugh. “You know when I’m angry. I can forgive you this one time.”

“It’s because of my charming good looks, isn’t it?” Doc teased Katona, following as she went to check out the food provided by the company. “You can admit that it’s a primary motivator for you.”

Katona snorted this time, glancing down at him with not quite affection, but something that still set his blood on fire. “You’re not the one who needs to worry.”

Her eyes sought out Theron as he picked through the spread, not even realizing they were talking about him now. When the spy glanced up, he saw that Katona and Doc were watching him. “What?”

Katona laughed, a single sharp bark that had Theron widening his eyes in fear. 

“Am I going to lose sleep over this?”

“Maybe. How much money have you put us out?”

Theron muttered something under his breath, turning his gaze away, knowing he was screwed. 

“That’s what I thought. Don’t worry, Theron. It’s not going to hurt that much.”

Katona’s best friend sighed and walked away, mumbling under his breath about Jedi and Sith and something that Doc couldn’t hear. Not that he cared when there was food to be eaten and a wife to spend time with.

#my writing #swtor summer exchange #swtor summer gift exchange #swtor #star wars: the old republic #star wars the old republic #sealeneee #swtor fanfic #swtor fanfiction #jedi knight #f!jedi knight #archiban doc kimble #archiban frodrick kimble #swtor doc #theron shan #jedi knight x doc #f!jedi knight x doc

[just-dreaming-marvel]

The Bond Between Us ~ 79

THE BOND BETWEEN US MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 1,655ish

Summary: You meet up with Luke, Grogu, and Ahsoka.

Notes: The next chapter is hella long and going to deal with Ben’s training and his fall to the dark side.

It was a few days later when Luke reached out to tell you that he had run in with his father’s former Padawan, Ahsoka Tano. He also told you that he felt a being reaching out for a Jedi with the Force. You encouraged him to follow it, though you already had a good idea of where it would lead.

You were home helping with Ben when Luke reached out to you again, asking you to come to Ossus. Ben was not happy you were leaving again, but you promised that you wouldn’t be gone too long. You left him with a kiss on the head before flying off to meet Luke. R2 greeted you when you landed. You smiled at the droid as it beeped excitedly at you.

“Hello there, old friend,” you greeted, placing your hand on the top of R2. Your smile grew as you sensed another familiar presence. You looked over at the tree line to see Ahsoka leaning back against a tree with her arms folded over her chest. “Hello to you, too.”

“Long time, no see,” Ahsoka smiled, pushing herself off the tree to come over and hug you.

“I’m so glad to see you.” You pulled away. “How is he doing?”

“Which one?”

You laughed. “Either.”

“Luke is a natural at this, though he still has much to learn.”

“He still is young… though, I guess when I was his age Order 66 had been executed and I was a prisoner to the Empire…”

Ahsoka sent you a sympathetic smile. “Our lives have truly not been easy.”

“No, no they haven’t.”

~~~

You and Ahsoka watched as Luke trained Grogu. It was clear to you that Grogu had blocked out much of his past, trying to protect himself. During the less structured time, Grogu seemed to want to stay beside you. It was curious to all of you, though you had a sneaking suspicion as to why. 

One night, while the others were sleeping, you stayed up and watched the flames of the bright fire dance amidst the darkness. Looking past the fire, you so Grogu sitting on a rock staring at you.

“Can’t sleep?” You questioned. Grogu didn’t respond, only looking at you with his big eyes. “Come here.” 

You patted the spot beside you. Grogu took a moment before slowly making his way to sit beside you. Once there, he stared up at you. You reached out to him through the Force, grateful that he reached back. You could feel him asking for help with remembering his time at the Jedi Temple.

“Are you sure?” You asked aloud. Grogu nodded. You moved so that you were better facing him. “Okay. It might be hard.”

Grogu encouraged you to continue. Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes and used the Force to reach into Grogu’s mind. You could see faint images—memories—that Grogu had of the Jedi Temple. You gasped when one became clearer. 

Grogu had been in another room but was looking out at the hallway. Your gasped was caused when you saw you, Anakin, and Obi-Wan pass by. Snapping your eyes open, you looked down at Grogu. He looked up at you, almost like he knew you.

“You… How did I never know about you?” You breathed out. Grogu’s answer was easy. “Oh, yeah, the war… May I see what else we can find?” 

Grogu nodded, and quickly your eyes were closed and you were back to exploring his memories. It replayed the memory you had just witnessed, this time with more detail. You could see the glint of your necklace chain being hit by the sun. That meant that this memory was after the proposal. With the solemn looks on your face and Obi-Wan’s and the anger on Anakin’s, you could only assume that this was the conversation you all had when Anakin was asked to spy on Palpatine. 

The scene changed suddenly. It was nighttime at the Temple now and there were Jedi standing in front of where Grogu was with their lightsabers ignited. There were Clones shooting at the Jedi, successfully killing them. You gasped as you pulled out of the memory. You had experienced your own version of that terrible night, left to wonder what the experience at the Temple had been like. Now, you were just given a snapshot of it and it was making you sick.

As your heart rate sped up, you felt a tiny hand on your knee. You looked down to see that Grogu had a hand on you as he looked at you. You could feel him trying to do his best to calm you, though he was troubled with the memory himself.

“I’m sorry you had to experience that,” you told him as you calmed. Grogu looked away. “I understand some of your pain… Ahsoka and I might be the only ones left who truly do.”

~~~

The next day, Grogu went off to train more with Luke, leaving you and Ahsoka alone. The two of you found a clearing that you could duel in until you felt a familiar presence.

“The Mandalorian,” you said, putting your saber away, “he’s here to see Grogu.”

The two of you knew that R2 would have met the Mandalorian and guided him to where you were camped out. You went there and saw the Mandalorian laying on a bench. He sensed the two of you, drew his gun, and sat up.

“You two,” he said. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

Ahsoka smirked as she leaned back against a tree. “I’m an old friend of the family,” she replied.

“I thought you weren’t going to help train Grogu.”

“We’re not. Master Luke is.”

“Then what are you doing here?”

“That is our question for you,” you said. You and Ahsoka headed toward the Mandalorian as he stood up.

“I’m here to see the kid.”

“And that’s why R2 brought you to us instead.” R2 beeped excitedly causing you and Ahsoka to laugh.

“What is this place?” The Mandalorian looked over at where droids were building a stone building.

“There’s nothing now,” Ahsoka said, “but will somebody be a great school. Grogu will be its first student.”

“I’d like to know how he’s doing.”

“He’s doing fine,” you replied.

“I wanna see him.”

Ahsoka sighed, giving you a look before answering, “we know you do. Let us take a walk.” Ahsoka led the way, with you and the Mandalorian following. “I warned you when we met that your attachment to Grogu would be difficult to let go of.”

“He was a Mandalorian foundling in my care. I just wanna make sure he’s safe.”

“There is no place in the galaxy more safe than here with Luke,” you told him.

“I don’t understand why you’re both alright with Skywalker’s decision to train the kid when neither of you would.”

Ahsoka exhaled sharply, causing all of us to come to a stop. “Because it was his choice,” she said. “I don’t control the wants of others.”

“Then, it’s my choice to go and see him.”

“Of course. If that is what you wish.” She looked up the hill where Luke and Grogu were sitting under a tree. The Mandalorian looked as well.

“Alright.” He started to head toward them.

“Are you doing this for Grogu, or are you doing this for yourself?”

The Mandalorian stopped and pulled something from his belt. “I just… I wanna give him this.”

“Why?” You questioned. “So he will remember you?”

“No. As a Mandalorian foundling, he should have this. It’s his right.”

“Foundling,” Ahsoka repeated. “Perhaps he is a Padawan now.”

“Well, either way, this armor will protect him.”

“If you are set on it, then allow us to deliver it.”

“I came all this way. He’s right there.”

“Grogu missed you a great deal,” you told him. “If he sees you, it will only make things more difficult for him.”

The Mandalorian thought about it as he stared at Luke and Grogu. He turned toward you and Ahsoka, holding out the gift. “Make sure he’s protected.”

“Of course,” you took the gift from him.

The Mandalorian looked back at Grogu before turning around and heading for his ship.

“I hate how I feel so hypocritical,” you admitted, looking down at the gift. “But I know that the Jedi way is to not have attachments, though Luke and I… Anakin… Obi-Wan…”

“It is better for Grogu this way if he is to continue his training,” Ahsoka told you.

~~~

You and Ahsoka met up with Luke and Grogu near the river, where Grogu was using the Force to hop from rock to rock to avoid getting hit by the blasts from the training remote. You watched as Grogu stopped the remote with the Force and broke it. Grogu looked over at the three of you and squealed.

“Good,” Luke said to him.

“You’ve taught him well,” Ahsoka said.

“It’s more like he’s remembering than I’m actually teaching him anything.”

“Sometimes the student guides the Master.”

“The Mandalorian was here.”

“As I told you, the two share a strong bond.”

“He brought him a gift,” you said, holding the gift out for Luke to take.

“Sometimes I wonder if his heart is in it.”

“So much like your father,” Ahsoka commented.

“What should I do about him?”

“Trust your instincts.” Ahsoka started walking away.

“Will we see you again?”

“Perhaps.” Ahsoka looked at the two of you, bowing her head slightly. “May the Force be with you.”

“May the Force be with you,” you repeated.

As Ahsoka walked away, you had a feeling that you would never see her again. It brought tears to your eyes at the thought of losing yet another family member. It had been a miracle that either of you survived Order 66 and the Empire to even see each other again. You would take these memories and treasure them, always.

next chapter >

TAGLIST IS CLOSED - Taglist Information

#obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi fanfiction #obi wan kenobi imagine #obi wan kenobi x you #obi wan kenobi x y/n #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi wan imagine #obi wan x you #obi wan x y/n #star wars imagine #star wars fanfiction #star wars imagines #star wars x reader

[heaven-s-black-box]

Let's get married- Han x Leia ft. Luke

Return to File

Recovery date: July 12th, 2022

Description: N/a

Notes: An entry from my 2022 research project into the universe of Star Wars. You can find the next entry here.

Word count: 745

Back to directory

“When you and Han get married, can I be your best man?”

Leia looked up from her holoscreen to stare at her brother in confusion.

They were sitting in Leia and Han’s apartment on Chandrila, Leia working on new republic policies and Luke tinkering with some old droid parts. It was a weekend ritual for the two, to take a few hours and just sit together, sometimes discussing their pasts. One that Leia was going to miss once Luke left.

“Luke, we just ended a war, now is not the time for a wedding.” She turned back to her screen. “Besides, we’re already basically married.”

This time Luke stopped what he was doing to look up at his sister, he watched her frown through the holoscreen and glance up at him through it.

“I mean, I know that, but no one else knows that.” He scooted closer to the table and rested his arms against it, setting down the parts he was tinkering with. “Think of it less for you two and more- for the people. You know, show them that we can have big celebrations now and- and-”

“What’s this really about,” she asked, turning off the screen and leaning forward on her forearms.

She watched him closely.

“I just it’d be better for your reputation incase, you know, you get pre-”

“Liar.”

He wasn’t fidgety, but it was obvious he was lying. Leia didn’t need the force to be able to see that much. Her brows furrowed as she tried to figure out why.

“There may or may not be a bet.”

“You’re betting on my relationship with Han?!”

“No-no, see betting implies there’s a chance I’ll lose. This is more like-”

“Like scamming people. What kind of Jedi scams people?”

“When you put it that way it sounds terrible, I wasn’t actually going to take their credits. Now, Chewwies credits…”

“Oh, so Chewwies apart of this too?”

“No! Him and I have our own bet- Hey! Hey!” Leia reached over the table to grab his ear and began to twist. “We’re just betting on who’s gonna propose!”

“And you bet on?”

“You! I bet that Han would be too nervous and you would propose!”

She let him go and he pouted, rubbing his ear.

“So this whole conversation was-”

“To get you to ask Han to marry you, yes.”

Leia sighed, and Luke picked up his droid parts again.

“What’s the other bet about?”

“How long until you dump Han. Like I said- not really a bet.”

She nodded, turning the holoscreen back on and returning to her work.

They went back to silently enjoying eachothers company as the sun began to set, Luke had moved on from his droid parts to maintaining his hand.

“I’m back- Luke, you're still here. Perfect, can I talk to you before you leave?”

“Sure-”

“We should get married.”

Leia didn’t even look up from her screen as she cut her brother off and both boys turned to her. Luke knocked something in his hand, pinching him and causing him to yelp in pain.

“Officially, I mean. I heard Naboo is nice this time of year, I’m sure we could find somewhere to have a small wedding,” she shrugged, looking up at Han.

Trying to play off his surprise, Han leaned against the wall.

“You sure you want a small wedding princess?”

“A small wedding would take less time to plan and hold, besides we don’t exactly have much family. It would only be, what? Five people in attendance, counting R2 and C3PO of course.”

“I thought you said you didn’t care about an official wedding?”

“I don’t, but Luke made a valuable point that it would keep rumors from spreading.”

“Did you now?” Han looked at him.

“So, is that a yes?”

“I dunno, might have to think on it a bit-”

“Han.”

She looked up at her screen at him.

“If you want to take next weekend off I can fly us out and back before Luke leaves for… where are you going again?”

“Ossus.”

“Right, doesn’t matter. Point is, we can have the wedding and be back before you have to leave, everyone’s happy.” He clapped his hand together.

An annoyed roar from Chewwy sounded from the other side of the door and Han winced, waiting for the scolding from Leia.

“And for the record, you didn’t need to ask Luke’s permission to marry me, I can make that decision on my own.”

#researcher s's recovery #s's 2022 recovery project #star wars #leia x han #leia organa #luke skywalker #han solo #chewbacca #fluff #crack #oneshot #sw oneshot

[evelhak]

Ossu! Eve-san!! can I request an art of your fav KnB characters lounging around in living room :D With Kagami and Aomine argue as they play card games, Midorima trying his best to meditate with his face so annoyed with AoKaga, and Kuroko trying his best to focus on reading a book, but Kise pestering him nonstop. Murasakibara lazily listening to Akashi explaining Shogi strategy (mura munching on snacks as always) and if it's okay, can we add haizaki as well, joining AoKaga playing card games and he also fights with them?

If it's too much, I totally understand! :D

I finally did it. Damn, this took me many hours, but it was so worth it. It was challenging for me with the number of characters, and I love challenges. Thank you so much for requesting it!

I couldn't imagine Haizaki in this scene naturally, so I added Momoi, Takao and grown up Nigou instead! This is the gang in my heart. 💙

I didn't imagine them in any particular living room, because I didn't want to be restricted with so much already going on, but when the picture was ready, I realized I had drawn a scene from my next planned fic, where they celebrate graduation by taking a trip together and stay in a house that turns out to be haunted. This would probably be their first night there, when nothing weird has happened yet. It's based on the novel Haunting of Hill House, and it was supposed to be an Aomine centric fic, but while looking at this picture I started feeling like it might benefit from switching POVs between everyone.

The wallpaper was the last detail I drew, and it was right after that when I heard a conversation between Aomine and Kagami in my head, Kagami saying he felt like the walls were full of eyes that were staring at them, and Aomine being like "Nah, they're boobs." That's how I realized they were in the haunted house, haha.

For someone who reads my fics, this picture is going to be so much fun to analyse, by the way. You have to zoom in a lot though. (Someone coming to me with a list of all the Easter eggs and riddles I put there, with their analysis about them, would be a day to remember. I'll just say most of them have multiple meanings or things they refer to. And some of them actually refer to the future.)

I love that I drew this, even though there's a lot I would still want to do better. I spent so much time getting the proportions right, only to realize too late that they still weren't quite right. But I like the interaction in there, and I think Murasakibara is my favourite part, since I had never drawn him before, but he turned out quite well, I think.

The process of drawing this was so much fun. It was so stimulating for my brain! Always up for complex requests. ✨

art requests

#knb #art requests #fan art #TOTverse

[not7wu]

Chapter Seven: House of Cards

Recap: Dinner with Tae is enlightening, and things are starting to look up! You even get to meet Jin's brother and sister in law, as well as their adorable niece. Counting dinner as a success, you can't wait to be reacquainted with old friends and spend more time with the rest of the boys.

On the ride home, even though it’s late, Tae convinces you to come over.  You mentioned never seeing Itaewon Class which he took personal offense to, since it features his OST and his Seojoon-hyung.  Tae insists that this has to be rectified immediately and what better way than to have a slumber party marathon.  You accept his proposal even though you're pretty sure you're going to pass out within the first half hour anyways.  When you get to their condo, all the boys are still up.  

Hobi rounds the couch to squeeze you in a hug.  “You guys came back so late!”

You snuggle into his hug as Tae baits the boys, singing, “Guess who we saw?”

“Well, where did you go?” Namjoon asks.

“Ossu Seiromushi,” Tae says.  

You feel Hobi stiffen, his limbs wooden around you.  You don’t know what’s wrong with him, but you try to soothe him, squeezing him a bit tighter.  “Hobi-oppa–?”

“Y/N, give them a hint!”  

You reluctantly pull back from the hug and catch a glimpse of Hobi’s face before he retreats to hug Jimin on the couch like some sort of lifeline.  

“Y/N!  Hint!”  Tae demands.  You shove him in playful annoyance as he dances a circle around you.  Closing your eyes, you take a dramatic deep breath to ready your performance, just because you know it’ll make him happy.  

Making sure you have everyone’s attention, you announce, “The most beautiful girl in the world is kaepjjang.”  

You flash everyone a thumbs up.

“You saw the family,” Yoongi guesses, mouth split with a gummy grin.  “How was it?”

“Fun.  Adorable,” you answer, as Tae hugs you from behind.  “I’m gonna have dinner with them on Saturday.”

Hobi purses his lips.  “Don’t we have plans Saturday evening?”

Your forehead creases as you run through your schedule.  “I don’t think so.  Don’t all of you have a GQ magazine shoot?”

“Not all of us,” Hobi says, as everyone looks at each other in confusion.  Hobi tilts his head and a lightbulb must go off because he goes, “Actually, I think I was remembering that Jungkook wants to spend time with you Saturday night, but I think I jumped the gun before he could ask you.” 

You whip your head to Jungkook who freezes mid-chew of an apple when he realizes everyone is staring at him.  

“What?” he asks, nervous and bug eyed.

“You were gonna ask Y/N to hang out with you Saturday,” Hobi reminds him.

Jungkook scrunches his nose.  “But we have that GQ shoot.”

Now, you’re confused.  “Uhhhh, what is happening right now?  Are we caught in a time loop?”

“Kookie, we already talked about the schedule and you said you wanted to hang with Y/N since it looks like you’re free.”  Hobi’s voice is measured, but it sounds like his patience is thin.  “Kookie said he was a little jealous that you had dinner with Tae.”

“Aww, Jungkookie.”  You feel your heart twinge a bit for the softest of the boys.  “I was already planning on asking you to hang out next.”

Jungkook looks between you and Hobi, uncertain.  “Really?”

“Really, really,” you reassure.

He zips towards you in excitement and Tae almost gets gutted by the forgotten apple in Jungkook’s hand in his enthusiasm.  “Oh!  We could go to an arcade!  Or have a picnic!  Ooh!  Or we could go to Lotte World!”

“We can do whatever you want,” you tell him as he clasps you in a tentative hug.  Of all of them, Jungkook has been the most careful with touching you.  With the others, he climbs, wrestles, and clambers all over them just fine, but he’s always so careful with you, making sure he’s in your line of sight before he makes a move, afraid to startle you.  It’s really sweet and you adore him for it.  You smooch a kiss to his head and he feigns disgust even as he blushes.  “I’ll have to text Areum-unnie to reschedule.”

Hobi bobs his head.  “I’ll take care of it, don’t worry.”

“Um, okay.  Well, I’m gonna go do my skincare and then come back in pajamas.”  

“We’re gonna do an Itaewon Class Slumber Party Marathon Extravaganza!” Tae announces.  It takes a moment for that to sink in with the boys, and then everyone starts moving all at once.

Yoongi fights a yawn, “I’m not gonna watch, but I’ll sleep out here with you guys.”

“Do we have enough snacks?”   Jimin runs to scour the kitchen pantry.

Jungkook dashes to his room.  “I’ve got a stash if we don’t!” he shouts.

“I need to go wash up too,” Jin shares out loud, Namjoon following behind him..  

The only ones left in the room are you and Hobi.  

“You said you’re gonna get ready and come back,” Hobi says, probably wondering what you’re still doing here.

He looks normal enough, but something seems off.  You can’t put your finger on it, and you don’t want to guess.  “Are you okay?”

He shoots aegyo finger hearts at you.  “Of course!  I’m excited for a sleepover with all my favorite people!”

Yeah, that enthusiasm seemed forced, but you decide not to call him out on it.  Hobi is a bit of a control freak, so it takes some time for him to process things before he’s ready to talk about them.  He’ll tell you when he’s ready.  

“I can’t promise I won’t pass out early,” you admit with a yawn.  “I have lunch with Jieun and a friend tomorrow and I don’t want to be fantasizing about naps when I’m with them.  I’ll be right back, Hobi-oppa.”

As you head to your apartment, you realize that spending time with the boys has become part of your nightly routine.  Everything has been smooth sailing so far, and you think this might be a good time to tell them about your recovering memories like how you met Jin and your school days with Tae.  You’re practically giddy because it finally feels like there’s progress.  You change into your pajamas and wonder if you should bring a sleeping pad, but when you go to text Hobi or Jimin, you can’t find your phone.  You must have left it at their condo.  Oh well. 

You decide to take an extra pillow anyway and practically skip back.  However, as you approach their door, your excitement dampens. You don’t know how the atmosphere could have changed so quickly in your absence, but the tension and distress emanating from the closed door is practically corporeal, a heated argument bleeding through.  You hover in place, debating if you should go in and mediate or if you should head back to your apartment to give them space when you are startled to hear your name. 

“Y/N was never supposed meet her,” Hoseok spits.  

“Y/N needs her.  She needs more than us.  Who are we to get in the way of that?”  Tae argues.

“We all agreed!  Y/N agreed!  She shouldn’t be near her because she can’t be trusted.”  

Who can’t be trusted?  Jieun?  Areum?  Who else do you know?  Hye?  Daeyon?  Is it you who can’t be trusted?

Jimin tries to reel things back.  “Hobi-hyung.  It’s been long enough and she seems better.  I think she can handle it.”  

“All of you are being selfish.  She needs more time.  Jin-hyung, back me up.”

Silence.  

“Really, hyung?  She’s relying on you.  Can you really be this weak?”

“Hoseok,” Yoongi growls.  “That was uncalled for.”

“Jin-hyung, you know you can’t have anything to do with Y/N.  She’ll be devastated.  You have too much baggage.  And Jieun-noona already admitted to telling her about Rule Five.  But it doesn’t change the fact that you can’t be with her.”

“I’m not trying to be with her.  I’m trying to be there for her.”

This distinction is both a balm and a cut to your heart.  You’ve been presented with a window to look in, but a boundary has been drawn that you can’t step over.  The potential for something more with Jin is pulled out from under you before you could start.  Was there really nothing else between you two?  Were all your flashbacks just a delusion, or something your brain created to fill in the gaps?  Your stomach plummets at the idea that you used a sexual fantasy to confirm a nonexistent connection between you and Jin.  It makes you feel dirty like, maybe you used him, or he used you.  

Hoseok laughs, but it sounds hollow and mean.  “Sure.  You don’t think I see the way things are going with you two?”

“Frankly, it’s none of your business.”

“Like I said.  Selfish.”

“Hoseok,” Namjoon cuts in, voice even.  “We all want what’s best for her, but–and pardon my french–you’re kind of being an asshole.”

“And all of you are crazy.  Things are moving too fast.  If she gets spooked, she’ll make a run for it.  We need to keep an eye on her.  She should stay home.  She shouldn’t be working.  And most of all, she shouldn’t be spending time with Jin-hyung’s family.”

“They’re part of this family too,” Yoongi states firmly.  “And they’re a part of this debacle.”

“Regardless, we agreed she can’t know the truth about any of this.  How many times are we going to keep doing this?  She’s already getting too close and she won’t be able to handle it.  I’m gonna call Bang PD-nim tomorrow about having her take leave from work.  I already took care of Areum-noona.”

“Wait,” Jimin says.  “Is that why you threw Jungkook at her?  So she couldn’t spend time with them?”

You hear Jungkook whimper in distress.  

Jin seethes.  “What did you do?”

“I told Areum-noona that Y/N isn’t feeling up to spending time with them.  And I deleted her and Seokjung-hyung from Y/N’s phone.”

“How did you get her phone?” Tae asks in disbelief.  

“She left it here.”

You are reeling as your trust shatters, frozen in place.  Your brain screams.  You need to run, but your body won’t move.

“I think we’re all losing sight of the goal.  You especially, Hoseok-hyung,” Jimin bites out.

“No.  I’ve never been more sure.  This is how we heal.”

Tae is so angry he sounds like he’s on the verge of frustrated tears.  “But we already are healing.  We had a moment.”

“Yeah?  And how do you know our powers of suggestion and her trauma didn’t manufacture that moment?”  Hobi’s words suck the air from your lungs, spilling the exact doubt that haunts you.  You will your numb limbs to move.  

“What are you trying to do?  Seriously?  What’s the point?” Jin shouts.

“Hyung!  Please stop fighting.  Please,” Jungkook cries.  His sobs are muffled as someone comforts him.

You’re already moving towards the elevator, Namjoon’s voice fading the further you go.  “Okay, guys.  We need to calm down.  Y/N is gonna be here any minute and we need to pull it together–”

—

You’re curled up in bed when someone comes to check up on you later.  You tried to will yourself to sleep, but your brain is running a mile a minute, their words playing on repeat in your head, mocking you.  Someone approaches your bed, so you close your eyes and lay very still, pretending to sleep.  Your hair is brushed back and they slowly rub your back.  

“Y/N?  Are you asleep?”  

It’s Jin.  You struggle to remain still, to not lean into the comforting circles he’s rubbing into your back, but you can’t trust this feeling.  You can’t trust anyone.  You can’t give anymore pieces of you when you barely have enough for yourself.  You wish you could pull Jin in and have him hold you like he did the first night.  You had thought he was your best friend, but now that you think about it, he never said so.  It was simply the conclusion you had drawn.  So, you don’t open your eyes.  You don’t say a word.  You focus on keeping your breathing slow and steady.  

Jin doesn’t leave.  He continues rubbing your back and you reluctantly let it lull you into true sleep.  As you drift off, you think you hear him say, “I’m sorry.”

—

“Hey.  Are you okay?”  

You shake yourself out of your fog.  You had been staring at your monitor, unseeing, for the past…half hour it seems.  It takes you a moment to figure out what’s going on.  

Jihoon is standing over you, concern written all over his face.  You sober instantly.  

Right. You are supposed to have lunch with Jihoon today.  

“Yeah, I’m okay.  Sorry.  I guess I’m just distracted.”

“Oh, well, we don’t have to get lunch if you’re busy.”

“No!  No, I’m not busy.  Let’s go.”  You refuse to let all the bullshit get in the way of you doing good for someone who is struggling.  Sure, you’re not having the best time yourself, but doing nice things for someone else makes you feel like you have some control.

Besides, there’s something about Jihoon that resonates with you.  He reminds you of yourself, shy and skittish.  His hesitant concern is something new, though.  It’s nice.  You’re touched that he’d come out of his shell for you.  With a determined smile you escort him out of the department.  “Jieun-unnie has a meeting she can’t get out of, so it’s just you and me.  I hope that’s okay.”  

The truth is, you didn’t want Jieun to have lunch with you.  You made up an excuse, saying you didn’t want to intimidate Jihoon with too many people.  You wanted to have lunch with him alone so he’d be comfortable.  She readily accepted your excuse, which made you feel a little guilty.  You wanted to turn to your unnie for comfort and advice, but she was too closely involved with your fears and doubts.  And she had admitted to Hoseok that she let you in on Rule Five.  You could no longer trust that she wouldn’t relay everything you tell her to the members.

You can’t tell what Jihoon is looking for as he glances around the office, uncomfortably.  “Yeah, that’s fine, Y/N-ssi.”

You stand and flash him your best smile.  “Let’s go out.  I heard there’s this place within walking distance that does a mean sundubu jjigae.”

You knew leaving the office would be a good idea because Jihoon relaxes as you make your way out of the building.  You don’t know what about Hybe stresses Jihoon out, but he really doesn’t like to be noticed here.  A little selfishly, you’re also trying to avoid Bang PD-nim.  Hoseok must have talked to him already because you saw Bang PD-nim headed your way this morning.  In a panic, you immediately picked up your phone and moved up a work call so you could look busy.  You murmured an apology with a promise to meet up with him when you had the time.  

You don’t want to be held hostage in that condo with BTS.  You don’t want to lose this bit of freedom you have.  Something is going on and you’ll never figure it out if they never let you out again.  The members keep talking about some plan and a truth, some big secret they’re hiding.  You’re not supposed to hang out with Jieun or Areum.  Hobi doesn’t want you working.  Whatever you have with Jin will never come to fruition.  You so want to at least believe in Tae, in the members who seemed to speak up for you, but they weren’t exactly forthcoming.  And all the trust that’s been built so far has cascaded down like a house of cards.  

The commute to work this morning was agony for you as you smiled and laughed and teased like there was nothing wrong.

None of this makes sense to you.  Wild theories have been pinballing in your head.  If they’re lying, why would you be here with BTS?  Did they do something to you?  Was the sasaeng attack even real?  Are they holding you hostage and gaslighting the hell out of you so you don’t sue them?  

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay?”

That’s right.  Jihoon.  Just focus on this moment.  Have a breakdown later.

You’re sat at a table in a quiet corner and you’re once again the focus of his concern.  “You said they have good sundubu jjigae so I ordered two for us since you seem distracted.”

You loosen the hold you have on your blouse and stretch your fingers, folding your hands on the table.  “Thank you.  Sorry.  I’m just–I don’t know.  There’s a lot going on right now, but I do want to be here,” you say.  This isn’t how you wanted lunch to go.  You’re fucking it all up.

Jihoon looks at your hands and then searches your face.  “Do you wanna talk about it?  I’m not trying to pry,” he hurriedly assures, “but if it’s bothering you so much, maybe you need to tell someone.  I’m not sure I can help, but I can listen, if you want.”

In this setting, away from everything, Jihoon looks more confident.  You realize he’s taller than you thought.  His posture is more self-assured.  It’s a good look on him even if it pains you that the roles have seemed to reverse.  Instead of helping him, he’s trying to help you.  

Would telling him everything be bad?  This whole thing is one big conspiracy theory and you don’t know who you can trust anymore.  You don’t even know if you can even trust yourself, but maybe you can have this.  A friend away from it all.  

“I, uh, I don’t know how I got to Korea, or why I’m here.”  Jihoon’s eyes widen a fraction.  Okay, so you just said that out loud.  You wait for him to bail, to react in some way, but he doesn’t say anything.  He waits for you to continue.

Slightly encouraged, you elaborate.  “I, uh, woke up here like two weeks ago?  And I have no memory of how I got here, or what I’m doing here.  I’m American and I don’t know BTS except for their music.  But they told me I lost my memory and that I’m actually Korean.  That I’m an orphan and I have no one.  And I don’t know if this is a dream or if this is real.  I don’t know if all of this is a figment of my imagination, and I think I’m going crazy.”

Yup.  So you said all that.  To a complete stranger.  Who now probably thinks that you’re nuts.  Wacko.  A complete lunatic.  What is wrong with—

“Not to be a pretentious asshole, but dreams or reality, isn’t all of that just a figment of our imagination?  Whatever our mind chooses to perceive?” Jihoon asks, shrugging.  “I think I’m real.  I feel real.  I have real feelings.  My own thoughts.  I don’t know what I can do to convince your brain that I’m real though. Maybe I should pinch you?”

He considers your forearms, and you’re taken aback, instinctively pulling your arms away from the table, but then he snickers, “I’m joking.  I’m not gonna pinch you.”

And it’s so ridiculous that you laugh.  You laugh until your eyes start watering, and you wipe them before they can fall.  You refuse to cry on top of everything else right now.  

Jihoon looks like he wants to comfort you, but doesn’t know how and it lifts your spirits a little, grateful for the levity.  “Thank you.  I needed that laugh.”

“I’m glad.  Thank you for being so nice to me, for getting me lunch.”

“You know, people at Hybe seem nice too.”

“I–” Jihoon hesitates, his eyes darting to his cutlery.  “I guess it’s only fair that I share some stuff with you too.” 

You lean forward, his uneasiness affecting you.

“I don’t feel welcome at Hybe,” he confesses.

“What?  Really?  Are people bullying or hazing you?”

“No, Y/N-ssi.  It’s just a feeling I get.  That people don’t want me there.  A reluctance.  No one has done anything to me, but it feels hostile.  I’d quit, but the money and benefits are nice.  On the other hand, I don’t know why they don’t just fire me, honestly.”

“Because you’re a good worker, Jihoon-ssi.  If they fired you, I would definitely have something to say about that.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Don’t know what?”

“That I’m a good worker,” he says with a lifted brow.  

Eh, what dignity do you have left?  “Not to sound like a creep, but I do notice you around the office.  You get things done fast and efficiently.  Sometimes, I’ll see you and think I should say hi, but by the time I finish my task, you’re already done and gone.”  

“You notice me?” he asks, disbelieving.  

“Yeah.  You’re nice.”

Jihoon’s smile is shy and his eyes crinkle like they’re not used to it, but so so want to.  He often makes himself small, nondescript, but here he blooms and gently takes up space.  You’re pleased to see him coming out of his shell.  You wanna ask about his food situation, but there’s this thing called ‘saving face’ that you don’t want to step on.  You also especially don’t want him to retreat within himself.  

“Jihoon-ssi.  What year were you born?”

“95.”  He tilts his head, confused by this sudden change in direction.

“Then we’re the same age.  If you could address me comfortably, I would like to be friends.”

“Oh.”  He looks like he could have never predicted this.  You’re suddenly hit with that deja vu, finding a similarity in the way Tae allegedly adopted you and how you’re now adopting Jihoon, but you quickly chase that feeling away.  You can’t trust it.  Instead, you smile reassuringly at Jihoon, who eventually returns it.  “Sure, Y/N.  Let’s be friends.”

The food is served and you spend the rest of the time talking about inconsequential things: the music you’ve been listening to, his cat, Miro, your poor cooking skills, and how he’s patiently waiting for Minho to return to Shinee after enlistment.

“Is it rude to ask when you enlist?” you inquire.

Jinhoon shakes his head.  “I already enlisted in 2018.  I’m done now.”

“Was it hard?”

“Not really.  I like working out, so it just felt like one long session at the gym.”

“Still, it must have sucked not being able to see your family as much.”

He balks and you immediately apologize.  “Sorry.  I shouldn’t have commented on something so personal.”

“No, that’s alright.  Um.  I do miss my family.  My parents died back in 2016.  Four years later and the hurt still feels fresh any time I think about them.  It’s a good hurt sometimes, but it still hurts.”

“You don’t have any other family?  Siblings?  Cousins?”  You know you’re being a bit invasive, but you want to know what sort of support system he has.  

“I have a half sister.  My mother married an American soldier and moved to America, but she missed Korea, so she moved back and remarried my dad.  It was a bit of a scandal, so both their families sort of ignored us.”

“That’s awful.”  

Jihoon shrugs, dismissing all of it as something in the past.

“Are you close with your half sister?”

“Kind of.  She’s the only family I have left and I’m looking for her actually.  I know she’s somewhere here in Korea, but I lost track of her.  I don’t have any money to hire an investigator to find her, so I’ve been trying to do it on my time off.”

An idea suddenly sparks in your head.  “Maybe we can help each other.”

Jihoon is wary.  “How?”

“I’ve actually been trying to find a file at Hybe, but I’m denied access at every turn.  BTS told me that I was attacked by a sasaeng ex-employee.  Kim Cho-hee.  I don’t know if it's a lie or if the file even exists.  As maintenance, you’re allowed access everywhere and you’re discreet.  If you could find me a physical or digital copy, it would provide me with some answers that I think I really need.  And in return, I can help you fund the private investigator.  I’ll pay for all the fees.”

Jihoon looks shocked as he processes your proposal.  “You’d really do that for me?”

“We’re friends, aren’t we?”

“But, you don’t even know me.”

“I know that I can’t do this alone,” you say resolutely.  “And without you, I’m alone.”

His expression softens in understanding.  “Yeah.  I’m alone too.”

“Then let's not do this alone.  Let's help each other.”  You muster all the sincerity you have and hope your desperation isn’t offputting.  If Jihoon refuses, you’ll be back at square zero with no lifeline.  

Honestly, Jihoon is perfect.  He is so far removed from everything.  Everyone barely notices him, regardless if he thinks people don’t like him.  In fact, if people at Hybe don’t like him, that makes you trust him even more.  The only connection he has to Hybe is as employer and employee.  He’s not embroiled in the politics and the gossip except for the snack thing, but you can easily fix that by feeding him.  You acknowledge that you’re kind of using him, but this will be a mutually beneficial relationship.  You can help him find his sister and you do truly want to be friends with him.  This isn’t the most auspicious start, but it’s the best you’ve got right now.

“Please, Jihoon.”

He fiddles with a napkin, but nods his head.  “Okay.  Let’s find out what’s real.  When do we start?”

You hand him your black card.  

—

You don’t stop by Bang PD-nim’s office before the end of the day.  You refuse to be pushed out of the only normalcy you have, the only contact you have with the outside world.  You know you can’t avoid him forever, but you’re going to try your best.  

On your commute home with BTS, Jimin invites you over for dinner and games, but you feign a headache.  You’re suddenly bombarded in the groupchat by all of BTS insisting that they come over to see you.  You take a picture of your leftover sundubu jjigae and tell them you’re fine.  You’ll eat dinner and then head to bed to sleep it off.  Jungkook suggests rescheduling hanging out tomorrow so you can rest, and you almost take him up on the offer.  Instead, you reassure him that you’re still on for tomorrow.  

You can’t avoid BTS.  They can’t know that anything is wrong, that you heard everything they said last night.  And you have to make appearances so they can’t use your health as a reason to pull you from work.  You’re allowing yourself to have this time.  You are just going to take a little break, to gather some strength to face them.  It seems like they know all of your idiosyncrasies, so you’ll have to turn up your acting skills.  

Well, you thought you were going to take a break.  You’re washing the dishes, making a mental note to remember to make a key for the cleaning ajumma, when someone knocks on your door.  It really was too much to expect them to give you space.  You brace yourself and answer the door.

You’re not surprised to see Jin standing there, book in hand.  You put on your warmest smile.  “I’m really okay.  You didn’t have to come.”

“I wanted to,” Jin says.  He brushes your hair from your face and you hold in a flinch.  A twinge must have shown because his brows furrow, worried.  “That headache must be a doozy.  Was work stressful today?”

You’re relieved.  He believes your excuse about the headache, but you don’t want to blame work.  “I think I was just listening to my music too loud.  I should turn it down before I get tinnitus.”

Jin grins.  “Yeah, that would be a good idea.”

You both stand there awkwardly and Jin doesn’t seem in a hurry to leave, so you’re forced to open the door wider to let him in.  He removes his shoes and you follow him to your room.  He drops onto the bed and pats the space next to him.  You don’t know what he’s trying to do, but you orchestrate your face to be open and curious.

“What’s up?” you ask.  You remind yourself not to nervously thumb the hem of your shirt.  You take it a step further and tell yourself not to fidget your hands.  Like a cut marionette, your arms hang at your sides.  You start overthinking your body language, unsure if your angles are natural, but you shouldn’t cross your arms like you want to.  Crossed arms means closed off.  Open arms means everything is okay.

“I figured with a headache, it’d be hard to sleep,” Jin explains.  “Music and TV don’t seem like good options, so I’ll read to you until you fall asleep.”

You could fight him on this, but you know Jin will persist.  You don’t want to raise too many red flags.  You might also be ignoring that you don’t actually want to fight this, that you do want him here, despite everything.  Jin suspects nothing, his expression hopeful and fond and just so happy to be here with you.  It’s difficult to refuse him anything when he looks like he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.  You are conflicted between your mistrust and being drawn to him like a moth to a flame.  

“Um, I’m gonna go get ready and then I’ll be right back,” you say nervously.  You dig out some modest sleepwear and head to the bathroom.  You’re on autopilot with your routine.  Be strong, Y/N.  Don’t give in too much.  You have to protect yourself.  

Jin is sitting against the headboard, book in hand.  You avoid his eyes and get into bed.  You sort of tuck yourself in so there’s a bit of a blanket barrier between you and him, but you roll on your side and face him.  You can sense his obvious amusement.

“Comfy?” he asks.

“Yup.  So what’s on the agenda?”  

Unbidden, you think, Jin doesn’t like to read.  He’ll read a page at a time if he does read, and he rarely reads for pleasure unless it’s an assignment of some sort.  You can’t tell if this is knowledge you already know, if you observed this in the weeks you’ve been here, or if it’s just something you inherently know.

“I don’t have much of a selection, so I picked whatever I could find in my room.  Tonight, we’ve got ‘The Remasculization of Korean Cinema: Culture, Politics & Society’,” he presents with dramatic flare.

You scrunch your nose.  If Jin reads that, you really will get a headache.

He of course notices and laughs.  “On second thought, this might not have been the best idea.”

“It was the best of intentions though.”

“I’ll see if Joon has anything lighter,” Jin says, turning over the book in disappointment.

“Why don’t you just tell me a story?”  The words leave your lips without your say so.  He glances at you in surprise.  

“What kind of story do you want?”

You scootch further under the duvet, only your eyes showing.  “Jieun-unnie said you were in love.”

Jin’s breath catches.  

“But you don’t have to tell me about it if you don’t want to,” you murmur.  Even with Jin being here, you have decided to put all your feelings into the box of lost things, which you intend to seal away and ignore.  Nothing is going to happen.  Nothing can ever happen with Jin.  So call this self-flagellation or morbid curiosity, but you just want to know.

“Why do you want to know about her?” he asks carefully.

You shrug.  “I wanna know what love looks like to you.”

Jin’s face softens.  He takes a deep breath and sets his book aside on the nightstand.  

“Hmm. People, movies and songs always talk about these dramatic moments.  Being struck by how beautiful someone is like lightning.  Jungkook with his ringing bells.  Tae with his red string of fate and soulmates.  But it wasn’t like that for me.  It was quiet.  Sneaky.  Like standing on the beach and not realizing that the tide is steadily rising.

“She was just someone who was around.  Someone I would see in passing.  Our schedules rarely matched up, so our interactions were incidental.  We never paid each other any mind.  We were too focused on our jobs.  Besides, she wasn’t very outgoing.  She was introverted.  Aloof.  Seemingly unruffled.  But I’d see the way she interacted with the people she was close to.  I’d wonder how someone so intimidating, who seemed so distant in the day to day, could suddenly be so comfortably silly and fearlessly weird with her people.  It’s something idols and celebrities work so hard to make seem effortless.  

“Actually, that’s the best word to describe her.  Effortless.  She wasn’t contrived.  Wasn’t polished, primped, and packaged.  Just naturally effortless.  

“Now, maybe I’m just an asshole, but it made me want to ruffle her up.  Rock her boat a bit just to see what she’d do.  I wanted to know what made her tick.  What songs she cried to.  What books she gave a second thought to.  What code she lived by.  

“I started off small.  I’d steal a pen off her desk.  She’d buy a one hundred pack of G2 pens with a sticky note that anyone was welcome to them.  I’d put googily eyed stickers on her glasses.  She’d stick the goggily eyes on plants around the office.  I’d anonymously rickroll her through email attachments.  She’d reply that my resume was outdated and kindly attached a better resume template, only to rickroll me back.  

“I upped my game.  I’d replace her corner mart bought gimbap with homemade gimbap.  She’d leave me tasty baked goods.  I’d leave her a mixed CD.  She’d leave me a mixed audio cassette.  I’d buy her mittens.  She’d leave me a scarf.  

“And then suddenly, it wasn’t enough.  I had to come by to poke and prod her with words.  I’d tell her she’s pretty.  She’d tell me I’m handsome.  I’d tell her she’s weird.  She’d tell me I’m obnoxious.  I tried to pull her into arguments, but wasn’t really successful until I lied and told her I don’t wear sunscreen when it’s cloudy.  She subjected me to a ten minute tirade about the science of UV rays and I loved it.”  

Jin had steadily grown distant as he went back in time, but he refocuses on you.  His words, the quirk of his lips, the twinkle in his eye had coaxed you out of your duvet cocoon.  You smile encouragingly.

“I don’t even know when annoying her became harmless flirting and then transformed into full blown conversations about kdrama tropes, rating local hole in the walls, and confessions of hopes and dreams.  Before I knew it, she was someone who became the one.  The one I wanted to see everyday.  The one I wanted to share my stories with.  The one who I wanted in my stories.  

“And I thought she was completely oblivious.  We always saw each other in passing or we were always with everyone else, but I really wanted to be alone with her.  I wanted her to only look at me.  

“It all came to a head when all of us bought tickets to go see Passengers.  You know, that Chris Pratt and Jennifer Lawrence movie?  We were all gonna catch dinner and then go see the movie, but I convinced the dongsaengs to skip out.  I took her to one of my favorite restaurants, and I had to pretend to go to the bathroom so I could pay before she could insist on splitting the bill.  We went to see the movie, but I honestly couldn’t tell you what it’s about.  I couldn’t stop watching her.  And whenever she’d catch me, I’d lean in and make a joke, I don’t even remember what, but just something so she wouldn’t suspect.  I wanted her to know how I felt, but I was also terrified of her knowing.”

The way he talks about her, about himself, it feels soft and shimmery like ocean foam, an airy wisp on a reminiscent breeze, and it stirs a longing in you.  Captivates you.

“When we left the theater, she spotted the maknaes.  They saw us coming and tried to hide, but the hilarious thing was, they hid behind cutouts.  Of themselves, advertising a fanmeeting coming up.  A truly slap yourself in the face moment that I couldn’t even appreciate at the time because Tae was busy selling me out, whining that they didn’t want to intrude on our date, but they also didn’t wanna waste their movie tickets.”

You roll your eyes, but your smile betrays your affection.  “What a bunch of idiots.”

“But they’re our idiots,” Jin says fondly.  His smile is small, but it’s a smile you haven’t seen before, like how you can only see Venus right before dawn or just after sunset.  A smile that is only reserved for special circumstances to align, and you stare unblinkingly, not wanting to miss it for a second because you don’t know when you’ll ever find the chance again.  

“I had to drag her away from those idiots.  And she kept trying to pull away, but I couldn’t let her go cuz’ I was trying to muster up my courage.  I dragged her four blocks before I had the nerve to face her.  Before I confessed that yes, that was a date.  That I liked her.  That I loved her.  And you know what she said?”

You hum.  

“She said, ‘I love you too.  But I dropped my glasses back there.’”

You splutter and burst into giggles in concert with Jin’s windshield wiping.  Jin hiccups, “We had to run back those four blocks to find her glasses before I could have my first kiss with her.”  

“You are also an idiot, Jin,” you snort.

“I know, I know.  Not my smoothest moment,” Jin concedes, elbowing you.  “And it wasn’t smooth sailing from there either.  Our schedules still didn’t align the way we wanted it to.  I would be tired and worn out.  She would be busy and frayed.  But we still made it work.  We’d fall asleep together over video calls.  I’d send her flowers and she’d have food delivered to me.  She’d surprise me at concerts.  I’d surprise her at conferences.  We had to steal our moments.   But it was the happiest I’d ever been.  I like to think she was happy too.”

Jin grows silent.  Something in him fades as he picks at your duvet, agitated.  You grab his hand and interlace your fingers, stilling him.  “What happened?” you whisper.  “Why did it stop?”

You know you shouldn’t be asking this.  You’re mentally slapping yourself for making Jin relive this knowing this doesn’t have a happy ending.  But you can’t stop yourself.  You have to reach the end.  You have to read the last page so you can close the book.  He stares at your hands and then…

Softly.  Bitterly.  With self-loathing, he says, “She became a victim of my industry.”

It’s vague, but there’s a finality that you dare not stir.  

Storytime is over.  

You want to apologize, but you know that won’t make things better.  In a way, it feels like you both needed this.  A cathartic release, but something’s missing.  You rub your thumb against Jin’s hand, trying to convey some comfort.  “She sounds lovely.”

“She is.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“Debatable,” he huffs in scorn.  

“Hey.”  You tug his hand so he’ll look at you.  His expression is stone, eyes dark when he finally meets yours.  You infuse every fiber of your being with earnesty.  “She sounds lovely.  Don’t retroactively deprive her of her autonomy.  Of her choices.  It wasn’t your fault.”

The stone cracks a bit, a tremulous smile playing on his lips, not quite accepting, but you think he heard you.  

You lightly squeeze his hand in yours.  “It’s getting late.  You should go to bed.”

When you try to remove your hand though, he doesn’t let go.  “Can I stay here?  At least until you fall asleep?”

He plays it like he’s doing this for you, but there’s an open vulnerability and loneliness in the way he’s looking at you.  Is this what Hobi meant when he said Jin had a lot of baggage?  You don’t quite feel devastated, but this isn’t baggage.  It’s a piece of history, and you find some small comfort that if your illness is in fact real, at least it’s your affliction, not Jin’s.  At least he isn’t forced to relive his history.  

“Sure, Jin.  Always.” 

Previous Chapter <- - -> Next Chapter

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Taglist: @miksancheese @justamomnamedamie @the-daechwita-archive @alpacaparkaseok @whatamitoyou

A/N: I totally didn't get this done till like 0130 so I didn't have time for a beta to read this through before my posting deadline. Sorry for the late post and for all the grammar mistakes! Tehee!

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #not7wu #not7wu masterlist #not7wu fanfic #not7wu fanfiction #tonight #tonight by Jin #tonight by not7wu #jin fanfic #seokjin fanfic #seokjin x reader #seokjin x y/n

[rainofaugustsith]

SWTOR.

So. About that news about SWTOR, that it is slated to be transferred to another company - yeah. Let's chat about that. Or I will.  TL:DR version: The licensing agreement for SWTOR was set to expire this year. My own hypothesis is that the Mouse did not renew it and pulled the license from Bioware because they did fuckall with it. Also Bioware has been fumbling a lot of their other games. So this isn't quite a sunny transfer.

My final screenshot of Viri and Lana at home in Naboo (headcanon for the Alderaan stronghold), February 2022, just before uninstalling SWTOR. One thing I have not seen mentioned is the fact that SWTOR's licensing agreement with the Mouse was scheduled to end this year anyway. 2023. It's been said for some time. Is it really a surprise the Mouse would not want things to go on as they are?

Given the near complete lack of attention and care that has been paid to SWTOR for a good five or six years now, I can fully understand why the Mouse would not renew the licensing agreement. Onslaught and Ossus looked as though a fair amount of development money had been poured into them - Ossus, Onderon and Mek-Sha had the same sort of acheivements and datacron hunts you found on the OG planets - but they were bright spots in a very bleak period. 

The amount of content released in a single patch of some other MMOs is more than the collective total of what was released for SWTOR in years. 

The story was haphazard. The companion reunions had no continuity, with some characters not even recognizing NPCs they'd actually worked with before (Nadia Grell and Jaesa Willsaam not recognizing Lana, for instance) or behaving completely out of character (Risha being completely indifferent about the fate of her planet, for instance). The writers killed off almost every character that moved and pulled a "somehow, the Emperor survived" stunt (not with the Emperor). The head writer did not even know a timeline for the story and had to talk it out on the message board. 

The devs tried hard to shove everyone into PvP (both ground and space) and Ops, while alienating other types of players, and made story content ridiculous. Known game-breaking bugs remained in the game for years. 

There's been a lot of turnover in the dev team and numerous reports about management completely ignoring feedback from devs. A few devs were witnessed mocking players on dudebro discords, and the changes they made seemed to benefit a select group of players. A few message board posters were plants trying to deliberately provoke players into inflammatory exchanges or white knighting any and message critical of the devs. Or that criticism was removed outright. 

Players who had invested a substantial amount of time and money into SWTOR and put a lot of effort into developing player guides and fan sites said "fuck this" and walked. The Steam charts show playership of about 3000K players per day. People stopped going to the test server because it became painfully obvious that the devs were completely ignoring most feedback. Problems and bugs test players pointed out made their way into the released patches anyway. 

Meanwhile the staff of SWTOR was getting poached for Anthem and Dragon Age. Anthem failed. Battlefront II went into maintenance after only two years. The next installments of Dragon Age and Mass Effect were proving to be complete clusterfucks. 

Is there really any reason the Mouse would have wanted to keep the license with Bioware? 

I do think this is a way to get SWTOR into a safe place - away from Bioware - but given the profile of the new company, I doubt it means we're going to see a Renaissance. I think it means the game is going to have a safe place to continue in maintenance mode. That's how it is with two other MMOs they have. The number of devs, as someone pointed out, is going to be 50% of what SWTOR has now. 

I do think they will keep it in maintenance mode as long as they can; as long as enough people keep subscribing to make that profitable. But I do think overall, this is it for SWTOR. 

I have not played SWTOR in a year and a half. I uninstalled it on the day 7.0 came out. My characters are all parked in their favorite strongholds with their favorite companions. I headcanon the game itself cut from Ossus directly to Echoes, with the scene at the end of Echoes, with Lana and the PC literally flying off into the stars being the end of the story. I feel it's better that way. Given all that was happening with SWTOR I feel like this was inevitable, too.  All the same, given the positives that SWTOR had - some of the gameplay and class stories, the rich lore, the planets, some of the characters - it leaves me bitterly angry and disappointed by the outcome. It's such a waste. An absolute waste of talent and time and people who were so totally invested in the success of this game. At the end, that's all there is.

Farewell, SWTOR. 

#swtor #swtor critical #bioware critical #rain talks swtor

[toujokaname]

Just As I Am / Episode 1

Author: Kanata Haruka

Characters: Tetora, Hinata

"This time, I'll try my best to show that I'm a "man among men"!"

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Season: Winter Location: Yumenosaki Academy Garden Terrace

Tetora: Hmm~m, hmm~mm...

Hinata: My, my~? Why're you staring at your phone? I mean, you'd usually be all over the delicious food in front of you, Tetsu-kun.

Today's special is the galbi[1] set meal, which made a triumphant comeback thanks to your passionate request, right?

I thought you'd be overjoyed since you kept sending requests to the cafeteria saying you wanted to eat it again.

Tetora: Of course I'm happy! I've been grieving the way it disappeared from the cafeteria menu all this time!

So I really am happy they brought back the galbi special!

I'm really happy, yet... Hnnn.

Hinata: Oh dear, now you've started worrying again...

Hellooo~? Your meal will get cold if you keep at it like this~ If you don't want it, then I'll take it~

Tetora: Woagh?! This is my galbi!

When the galbi's gone, it turns into just a regular meal set! Spare me from that, at least!

Hinata: Tch~ I thought I could have one more dish for lunch, bummer...~

Well, joking aside. What the heck are you so worried about you'd even ignore your beloved galbi?

Tetora: ...Actually, I got a message from Anzu-anego saying that my "Feature Live" has been decided.

Hinata: Oh, that's great news!

I see, I see, so that's why you were staring at your phone instead of eating.

If that's the case, then you're troubled 'cause of that "Feature Live," right, Tetsu-kun?

Tetora: That's exactly it. This time, it's my solo live, huh.

So, I've been thinking about it again. What kinda "Feature Live" do I wanna do as the current me?

Hinata: I see~ But it's a little surprising that you're worried about such things.

If it were the usual Tetsu-kun, I thought you'd immediately say, "I wanna make it a live that feels like a man among men! Ossu!"

Well, but surprisingly, Tetsu-kun has a sensitive side too~ Like, if you trip over a pebble, it seems like you'll keep thinking about the cause for a long time, y'know?

Tetora: ...I wish you wouldn't make such a strangely realistic analogy.

At first, just like Hinata-kun said, I wanted to make it a "man among men" live.

But when I thought again about what a "man among men" means, I kinda became unsure...

Remember when I had my personalized outfit made?

At that time, I didn't have any specific preferences other than wanting a cool outfit, right?

Hinata: Oh~ You sure said that.

Looking back now, saying "I want a manly outfit" and then answering that you don't have any specific preferences wasn't very manly at all.

Tetora: Ughh...?!

Hinata: Answering "what do you want for dinner?" with "anything's fine" is as troublesome as it gets.

In that situation, a man among men should quickly reply with "Meat!" ♪

Tetora: You've changed the subject, Hinata-kun!

Hinata: Ahaha, my bad, my bad. But you get my point, yeah?

Tetora: ...Well, I do get it.

It's hard for me to hear when, even today, I was struggling to decide between the galbi special or the ginger pork special, or perhaps katsudon...

Uuu... I'm so pathetic! Not manly at all!

Hinata: Wow, a lighthearted topic I casually brought up is making an unexpected wildfire spread?!

W-Well, Tetsu-kun, calm down.

What to have for lunch and the live are on totally different levels of importance. Though it's understandable that you're feeling troubled.

And, look. When it came to the personalized outfit, after all that, we properly organized what you wanted to do with it, and then gave the requests to Anzu-san, right?

Tetora: You helped me out a lot back then, Hinata-kun. I was seriously grateful.

...Even now, I still believe the answer I gave to Anego was correct.

The ideal image I have in my mind. The cool appearance of "a figure that keeps growing while working hard" is the same as ever.

But, wouldn't that result in the answer being the same as before? If it's identical this time, wouldn't that lead to a contradiction?

Hinata: A contradiction?

Tetora: See, I'm saying that I wanna keep growing, but the answer's the same as before. Can you really call that "growth"?

Hinata: Ah, I get it. I think I understand what you're trying to say.

In short, if nothing changes from before, then it'll look like you haven't grown.

But the part of you that says "keep working hard and keep growing" is the part that shouldn't be changed so easily.

If that part changes, then it wouldn't be Tetsu-kun anymore.

Tetora: Yeah! Yeah, that's right. Because that's a part of me I don't want to waver, I end up worrying even more.

I need to think about the direction of the pamphlet, but I'm at a loss for what to do...

Hinata: So let's do it again?

A "Meeting to Discuss Tetsu-kun's Feature Live!" Something like that, while borrowing everyone's strength!

Tetora: Hm~mm. I would like to ask for help from everyone, but for now, I wanna think a little more on my own.

We shouldn't start thinking together until I decide what kind of live I want.

I feel like I need to decide on my ideal before moving forward.

Hinata: ...I see. I get it.

Well then, I'll be waiting for the moment when you're like, "Ah, this is it!"

And if you want, you can show it to us in person at the live! It'd be like a surprise!

Tetora: Ossu! I'm really indebted to you for all the support you've given me, Hinata-kun.

This time, I'll try my best to show that I'm a "man among men"!

 Galbi is a type of grilled meat dish from Korean cuisine.

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