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roosterforme · 2 months

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Covering the Classics Part 1 | Bob Floyd x OC

Summary: Bob is happy for his friends, but feeling like the fifth wheel every weekend has gotten old. Anna's main goal is to fly under the radar as she starts work at San Diego State University with her shiny, new graduate degree. She is convinced that the only company she needs is her own, but a specific flyer in the faculty lounge catches her interest.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, adult language, eventually 18+

Length: 2800 words

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)

Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more! Thank you to @mak-32 for the beautiful banner!

Bob hated it when Natasha was deployed without him. He always ended up feeling like the fifth wheel now that Bradley was married and Jake was dating Jessica. Well, both of those were actually understatements. Bradley was devoted to his wife, and Jake was soppy now that Jessica moved in with him. And Bob's feelings on the matter were never more evident than on nights out at the Hard Deck.

Without fail, a girl or two or three would hit on one of the other guys, and they would deftly try to pawn said girl off on Bob only for the girl to look rather disappointed and kind of wander away. He just had that effect on women. He was a lot better with the written word than with the spoken, and something just didn't translate well for him when he was met face-to-face with an intriguing smile and an attractive body.

He groaned as he watched another woman head off in the direction of the bar as soon as he nervously stumbled his way through a sentence where he tried to introduce himself. How exactly was he supposed to compete with Jake Seresin anyway? Nobody who originally wanted him was going to settle for Bob.

"I got you more peanuts." Bob looked up to see Bradshaw's wife smiling at him and holding out a cup. Ever since he visited Chippy's bar, he didn't want to admit to Penny that hers weren't quite as good, but if someone went out of their way to bring him a cup full, he was going to eat them. And it was also nice of her to make sure he was included tonight while Mickey was babysitting his nephews.

"Thank you," he replied softly, and she patted his shoulder.

"I saw you talking to that girl?" she asked, nodding her head toward the bar. "She's really cute."

Bob shook his head as he looked down at his ginger ale. "I mean, yes, she was very pretty, but I wasn't really talking to her. She didn't want to talk to me, actually." He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks as he looked up at her from his stool. "She wanted to talk to Jake."

She rolled her eyes, and Bob kept his fingers occupied by cracking open a peanut. He craved the familiar intimacy he saw when he looked at his friends and their partners. Maybe jealousy wasn't the right word, but he always felt left out of the loop. They all knew something he didn't, and he craved to be on the inside with someone of his own.

"I'd choose you over Jake any day, Bob. You're smart, and I like talking to you."

He smiled at her as he said, "That may be the case, but you'd choose Bradley over me."

"You got me there," she said with a laugh as she kissed his cheek, making him avert his eyes to the floor. "I'm probably not the best judge of character though."

Bob looked toward where she was smiling now and saw Bradley with his hideous tie dye shirt and idiotic looking backwards baseball cap as Jessica slaughtered him in a game of pool. "Yes, you are," Bob told her quietly. Because as soon as Bradley looked at his wife, his expression became one of complete wonder.

"Sugar! Come here! Jessica is being mean to me again!"

She squeezed Bob's shoulder and then took him by the hand, bringing him along with her to the pool table. He blushed again as he looked a little nervously at Bradley, but everyone knew Bob was harmless. He was the one just drinking a ginger ale since he had to drive home.

"Baby," Bradley whined. "She won't even let me try to make a shot."

"That's not her being mean to you. That's her being better than you," his wife replied. "And what's the moral of the story again?"

"Women should never be underestimated," Bradley and Jake said in unison.

"That's right," Jessica said as she sunk the 8-ball into one of the corner pockets. "Especially ones who have a PhD and tenure." She handed her pool cue to Bradley and did a little dance. Then she reached into Bob's cup of peanuts and said, "Chippy's are better."

"They are," he agreed with a nod and a grin. He cleared his throat as Bradshaw's wife finally dropped his hand. "So I heard the new semester starts on Monday?"

"Yes," Jessica gushed as she fixed her glasses. "And Brian took a position at the community college, so this should be my best semester yet."

Bob already knew that Jake was relieved that his girlfriend would be going to work in a more comfortable environment every day, but it was nice to see how excited she was.

"You know what I was thinking?" Jessica asked Bradshaw's wife quietly. Bob wondered if he should step away and give them some privacy, but they both kept helping themselves to the cup of peanuts. "Maybe we could put something up on the notice board in the main building, kind of inviting the other female teachers at the school to have lunch together one day? I felt so embarrassed and excluded from things because of Brian, I just thought it might be nice for anyone else who feels marginalized?"

Bradley's wife nodded. "I think that's a great idea."

Bob listened to them for a few more minutes before he wished them good luck as they started back to school for the fall term, and then he excused himself for the night. He stood outside in the dark parking lot for a few minutes and listened to the sound of the ocean before he climbed into his truck and headed for his silent house.

--------------------------

"Dr. Webber."

Anna looked at the name placard on her office door and bounced up and down. "Dr. Webber," she read out loud again. She had the worst office on campus, no doubt about that. It was miniscule and kind of smelled like stale bread since it was so close to the cafeteria, but she loved it. All of the shelves were crammed with her books, and she could lock the rest of the world out when she needed a minute to herself. She just hoped that the tiny office wasn't a sign of bad things to come after San Diego State University willingly hired her less than a month before the start of the term.

In a matter of eight weeks, she had finally- finally- graduated with her PhD in English Literature and secured a job on the other side of the country. She sold everything she could think of, including her rings, and moved from gloomy New Jersey to a studio apartment in sunny southern California. Sure, all she had in her kitchen was a toaster oven and a mini fridge, but she was on her own. She had nobody to answer to. And she never would again.

"I guess everything is smaller here," Anna told herself as she locked her office door and went in search of the classroom where she would be holding the first lecture of her teaching career. She was too early for the class, but she was filled with nervous energy and decided that walking around would help.

She looked in classrooms and listened to a poetry lecture on the third floor. She found a really secluded ladies' bathroom as well as a reading nook. Eventually, she and her copy of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn managed to wander all the way to the main building where she found a faculty lounge.

It smelled like coffee, and there were snacks out on the counter, and everyone was talking in pairs or small groups. She should probably get to know her colleagues, but she also didn't mind the anonymity that came with observing everyone without engaging. She was good at that, and she'd spend too much time around people who needed to be in the spotlight all the time. As she reached for a donut with pink frosting, she saw a notice board across the room and went to take a look.

The hum of conversation around her was comforting as she read about a yoga class in the quad, alumni night, and a teacher appreciation banquet. Then her eyes caught on a single piece of paper with a plain black font. It wasn't flashy, and somehow it reminded her of a page from a favorite book.

WELCOME BACK FOR THE FALL SEMESTER, LADIES!

If you're interested in getting to know some other women who work on campus, let's meet for a friendly lunch on the first Tuesday of the term! Noon in the quad next to the weird tree.

Anna laughed. She knew where the quad was, but she wasn't sure which tree was the weird one. They actually all seemed a bit out of place to her since she wasn't used to living near palm trees. She started to skim a notice about how to recycle old textbooks, but she didn't get far before she was re-reading the one about meeting up for lunch.

If it was truly meant just for women, then it sounded kind of nice. She could eat her sandwich outside. She liked weird trees. The idea of having zero men around made it even more appealing. The last thing she wanted was to develop an interest in anyone right now. Or maybe ever again.

She took out her phone and snapped a picture of the page before checking the time and leaving with her donut. Twenty minutes later, with her class assembled before her in a small lecture hall, she cleared her throat and said, "Welcome to English 205. I'm Dr. Webber, and this semester we will be covering the classics."

------------------------

"You can do this. You'll be fine," Anna said as she walked slowly across the quad toward a palm tree that looked like it somehow started growing sideways about six feet up from the ground. "It's just some people."

But she wasn't good with people. Kevin had been quick to tell her that all the time. He liked to point out that she was awkward unless she was talking about literature or poetry or something from the New York Times bestseller list. Apparently she didn't know how to talk about normal things. Her hands started to sweat as she held onto her brown paper bag and can of ginger ale.

"Oh god," she groaned as she got a little closer. Truly, there was nothing to be afraid of. It was just two women smiling as they talked to each other with their lunches. But they were both beautiful. Like the kind of stunning girls that Anna was always afraid to talk to when she was a teenager. One was wearing a suit and high heels, and the other was wearing cute brown loafers and some tweed, and she felt like her own outfit looked awful now by comparison.

It wasn't too late to just walk past them and loop back toward her office and never try to socialize again. "Yes, let's do that." She nodded and picked up the pace a little bit. She could turn left at the weird tree and then maybe even make a run for it. "What are you doing?" she whispered, slowing down again. It was one thing to swear off men, but it wasn't going to be an enjoyable existence if she never tried to make a single friend here.

With a deep breath, she forced herself forward, and then soon two sets of eyes were on her. All she saw was matching smiles as she approached and said, "Hi. I'm Anna Webber. Is this the weird tree?"

"It's the weirdest tree I've ever seen," said the first woman as the other one jumped to her feet.

"Hi! Are you here for lunch?" she asked as she adjusted her glasses. "I told you someone would come," she whispered to the first woman before sticking her hand out. "I'm Jessica Reed! I work in the physics department, and this is my friend, and we are so, so happy you're joining us."

Anna smiled at how bubbly she was as she briefly shook her hand. "I just got here," she said with a wince. "I mean... it's my second day working here? I just got hired. In the English department. I'm teaching literature." God, could she sound like any more of an idiot right now?

But Jessica gasped in response. "Advanced Literature!" Then both women squealed, and soon the other one was introducing herself and talking about the math department and pointing out a building Anna had never been inside yet.

"It's silly, we know, but we kind of have code names for each other. I'm Advanced Calculus, and Jessica is Advanced Physics. You can be Advanced Literature. If you want." Now she looked a little uncertain while Jessica bounced in her high heels. "Wow, we sound like absolute nerds."

"We are nerds," Jessica confirmed with no shame as she looked at Anna. "I collect scientific journals. She uses math as foreplay with her husband. Do you want to eat lunch with us, Anna?"

Her response came with an ease that she hadn't felt in a long time. "Yes. Please." Then both women were shifting their lunches down and making room in the middle of the bench. Anna took a seat and watched Advanced Calculus pick a carrot stick out of the most beautifully organized lunch container she'd ever seen. She also had a tie dyed lunch box that was charming in a hideous way.

"How's your first week going?" Jessica asked as she bit into a delicious looking sandwich on fancy, multigrain bread. Anna knew she didn't fit in here at all as she pulled a plain turkey sandwich and some peanuts from her bag, but it was all she could afford right now.

"Well," she said with a sigh. "It's better than New Jersey."

Both women squealed again. "You're from the east coast!"

"Yeah," she replied as she opened her ginger ale. "I grew up in New Jersey. I went to college and grad school in New Jersey. I attempted to move to New York, and then somehow I ended up here." She left out the heartbreaking parts about Kevin, because he didn't really belong in a conversation where she was surprisingly kind of enjoying herself.

She learned the two women were from Massachusetts and Virginia, and that they both had PhDs from prestigious universities. They were both in committed relationships with naval aviators who also happened to work together. And both of the men loved packing their ladies lunches.

"Lucky," Anna muttered as she popped a peanut into her mouth and thought about the kitchen in her studio apartment. It was so small, it almost didn't exist. She was almost thirty and essentially still lived in a dormitory. How sad.

"Hey," Jessica said suddenly. "If you like peanuts, you'd probably love Chippy's!"

"What's Chippy's?" Anna asked curiously.

"Eww, no. Don't listen to Jess. Chippy's is a disgusting dive bar on the other side of campus."

"It's not disgusting! He just doesn't clean the floor."

Anna laughed. "I actually do love peanuts, but I'm not a big drinker." Then both women silently studied her, and she could feel heat rising in her cheeks. She'd said something wrong already. Of course things couldn't be this easy.

"Huh. You like ginger ale," said Advanced Calculus as she sat paused with a carrot stick halfway to her mouth.

Anna nodded as she said, "My... well, a guy I know used to make fun of me for being a ginger and loving ginger ale." She gestured to her auburn hair which was clipped up at the back of her head.

"Are you married? Or in a relationship?" she asked, and she finally bit into the carrot.

Anna didn't even have a chance to reply as Advanced Physics gasped on her other side. "You like peanuts. And ginger ale. How do you feel about men with glasses?"

"How do you feel about men with greenish blue eyes?"

"How do you feel about sweet men who blush?"

"Would you ever date a guy in the Navy?"

"Are you fond of beat up pickup trucks and country boys?"

"Do you want to come to the Hard Deck this weekend?"

Anna was starting to get whiplash as she looked back and forth between the two of them. "Wait, I'm sorry. What? I thought we were talking about a place called Chippy's?"

"We were. But now we're talking about a man called Bob."

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Omg omg omg. Okay, here we are with a story for our lovable Bob. Thanks for reading about the Sugarverse. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 2

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#bob floyd x oc #robert floyd x oc #robert bob floyd #bob floyd #bob floyd imagine #robert floyd imagine #robert bob floyd x oc #bob floyd fic #bob floyd fanfiction #robert floyd fic #robert floyd #top gun imagine #top gun maverick imagine #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfiction #roosterforme #covering the classics

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cowboy-lover69 · 1 year

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Ghostface first-time with you headcanons

(1,236 words)

(nsfw 18+ only)

Billy Loomis

--- It would be like a month into your guy's relationship when he suggests having sex. He would not ask you outright, he would dance around it for a minute before asking you he's a little bashful about the whole thing.

--- When you guys start having sex he's pretty gentle, he doesn't want to scare you off the first time you have sex with him he goes easy on you. During sex he asks you a lot if you are enjoying yourself but in a hot way like “Oh, do you like that sweetheart?”

--- He definitely tops you the first time you guys have sex. I mean in general he never really bottoms unless you ask really nicely, but since it's your guy's first time he kinda gets a feel on how you are in bed so he goes with what he's used to.

--- After sex, he probably lay there for no more than a moment then got up to get dressed. He's very casual about the whole thing. After the first time, it might be a little awkward but he tries his best to break the tension after the first time you guys have sex.

Stu Matcher

--- You guys would most likely have sex for the first time within the first few weeks into your relationship at most 3 weeks. It would be pretty informal just something that happens. Like you, two would be sitting on your couch watching a movie, and he starts making out with you, and one thing leads to another and you two are having sex.

--- stu is very goofy and informal when it comes to sex in general. He will crack jokes during sex and stuff like that. it's not like the sex is not hot though, he just toes the line very carefully between silly and hot. The first time it does take you aback a little thought.

--- Stu is a freak. I mean he's a very kinky guy. He refrains from doing anything too kinky in bed the first time you guys have sex, he doesn't want to scare you off.

--- After the first time you guys have sex he will ask you if you had a good time along with other questions about his performance then you guys will go watch tv.

Mickey Altieri

--- you guys would most likely not be in a relationship when you guys first have sex. I feel like he would joking flirt with you and come onto you, well you would think he was joking but he wasn't. At some point, you will say yes as a joke, because you didn't think he actually would do it, but he did. Of course, you were a little shocked but you gladly reciprocated.

--- Mickey is not ashamed of his kinks and does not fear scaring you off with them. He goes all out during your guy's first time. It could be a little overwhelming how much of a freak Mickey is compared to others you have slept with, but you get used to it.

--- After you guys have sex for the first time you guys might lay there for a few minutes before Mickey asks for a round 2.

Roman Bridger

--- You and Roman would definitely have sex for the first time before being in a real relationship. It would most likely happen at a party or after a party. Definitely, a situation where you two had started making out which led to sex.

--- Roman is really selfish when it comes to sex. You're not used to it your first time around but you don’t mind it too much.

--- After having sex for the first time with Roman he asked a few questions about how the sex and he gave you a few compliments then he just got up, dressed, and left. He's not too interested in having conservation. Of course on further sex adventures with him, he's warmer to you.

Jill Roberts

--- I don’t feel you guys would have sex for a little while in your relationship. At least 2 months and at most 3 months. You guys would be watching a movie and a sex scene would start playing and Jill would lean over to you and would say “ I think it would be fun if we did that. Don’t you think so?”

--- Jill definitely has a pain kink. Not like being in pain, she likes inflicting pain on others. She doesn't go too much into it the first time you have sex with her. Mostly to see how you feel about the whole thing.

--- After sex, you two will just lay there for a few minutes until she says “That was fun right?” afterward she offers to get you something to drink.

Charlie Walker

--- Charlie would be rather eager to have sex, but he definitely doesn't instigate it, at least for the first time. You guys would be like watching a movie or something and then you guys start making out and one thing leads to another and you two have sex.

--- Charlie is rather nervous during your guy's first time, he just wants to please you so he does whatever you ask. He's almost a little too giving during sex. When you guys get a little more into it he will ask you to do something for him mostly just fulfilling the fantasies he has about you.

--- After you guys have sex he will praise you for your skills, then he admits that you have been the first person he had ever had sex with you guys talk about that for a little before you two go to sleep.

Amber Freeman

--- I think it would be a very spur of the moment kinda thing, she would pull you into a closet at a party and they ask you if you want to.

--- I feel like she has a thing for this kinda thing both public sex and very spur-of-the-moment sex. It definitely takes you by surprise but you get used to it.

--- After you guys have sex for the first time you and her will just leave the closet as if nothing happened. After you guys leave the party you guys will talk about it.

Ethan Landry

--- I think you guys would have sex very soon after dating. I think you guys would be playful and be messing around then somehow you end up on top of him. You would realize he was turned on so you offer to relieve him.

--- I feel like when you guys have sex for the first time he would be pretty basic since he's pretty new to sex in general.

--- After the sex, he would be pretty amazed at how good the sex was, and sheepishly ask for a round 2.

Quinn Bailey

--- Quinn is a pretty sex-positive person. You guys would most likely have sex before you guys officially dated.

--- Quinn has a VERY high sex drive so if she can’t she will make sure you can go as long as possible of course your stamina might not be able to keep up the first time since you probably don’t have that kinda stamina yet.

--- After sex, you guys will take a little bit of a break since you are probably pretty tuckered out from the very long sex session, but soon after maybe 10-15 minutes of just talking while laying in bed she will ask you when you wanna go again

masterlist (taking requests)

#stu matcher x reader #mickey altieri x reader #roman bridger x reader #jill roberts x reader #billy loomis x reader #charlie walker x reader #amber freeman x reader #ethan landry x reader #quinn bailey x reader #headcanon

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tastesousweet · 1 month

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⭒ the girl with the tattoo (viii) - pt 1 pt 2 p3 p4 p5 p6 p7

matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader

summary : the triplets' birthday party is a perfect place for flirting, tension, and... well, matt and y/n's forte.

warnings : use of alcohol, weed and smut ( just a lil flithy icl ), beware that the word count on this ho is crazy - meaning i did not proofread!

mickey speaks : this took a MINUTE to get out im sawrryyyy. i tried to fit everything into one part and ended up rewriting almost the entire part last minute (which is most of the reason why this is very delayed), sooo hope you love??? bc i dont lmfao also the triplets r a couple yrs older in this (turning 23)

THIS IS PART EIGHT GO READ THE OTHERS FIRST!!!

"JESUS, matt. can you take this seriously, please?" chris scoffs, taking the dry-erase marker cap from its awkward spot between his teeth.

matt's not one to continue adding his opinion knowing it won't be listened to. he prefers to leave the impossible-to-get-a-word-in debating to nick and chris who have no problem yelling over each other to the point that they don't even know what the issue ever was.

so he's found comfort in sitting at the dining room table with his eyes firmly closed and arms used as a pillow for his head, leaving nothing but a dollop of his hair to be shown, or as he told chris "attempting to find peace for myself while living with you chaotic fucks."

"what could you possibly want from me?" matt asks without moving from his face down position, voice muffled and strained.

"i want you to fight for your opinion! don't you care about what we do for our birthday?!" chris stresses while nick rolls his eyes and falls into a bored stance, leaning against the dark marble counter.

matt finally raises his head causing his face to scrunch up and eyes to squint due to the sudden and bright change in lighting, "no? i actually don't give a shit, chris."

chris first feels the instigator within him sighing in defeat only for his pride to take center. he figures if nick has practically given up and matt cares so little, that gives him all of the creative action for birthday plans. exactly what he wanted.

his lips form a tight line to hide his satisfaction as he shakes his head slowly, unevenly wiping his hand across the magnetic white board (that he used to write the many ideas thrown around in his head, mistakenly thinking a visual would narrow things down for him and nick). “‘kay. then i’m getting nate to help plan us a house party and it'll be fucking perfect. because i care.”

౨ৎ

you've never been so grateful of your front door's placement this close to the kitchen. but carrying three cake boxes and a tote bag the size of your torso, desperately needing to put them down after traveling up three flights of stairs, will surely be the task that brings that gratitude out of you.

though when you arrive, your scrunched eyebrows and pouted lips are an apparent contrast to the enthusiastic vibe of your kitchen- with andrea moving her hips to the lines of spanish dancing in the air, waiting patiently for the sizzling indication of her fried egg's tenderness, and the use of pink lemonade-colored towels or handles on utensils (that made you and andrea way too happy during one of your first target runs as roommates) scattered around.

drea finally notices you when your metal keychain clanks against the countertop, "y/n!" her excitement slightly dulls with her widened eyes when she gets a better view of your face, turning the stove off and coming closer to hug you. "hi, good morning-ish. are you feeling okay? ...or, like, sad?" you silently accept her gesture and tuck your head in her neck while she caresses your hair with a sigh, "or both at the same time...?"

your response is a breathy sigh and pause before the words tumble out, "m'fine, i think. just overestimated myself a little with staying up so late." you remove your head from her neck and move backwards to lean against the countertop, fanning your hands to create a much needed breeze, "and i'm so hot, it's making me feel gross."

andrea peers into the clear plastic cutout on top of one of the boxes, "at least the cakes look nice."

a week ago you set your mind on gifting the triplets their own cakes for their birthday (thinking that sharing a day was already enough, no way would you want them to have to share and agree on only one cake). you easily gathered their cake preferences by sneaking it into any random conversations you'd have with each of them.

and after a week of planning and preparing, was it so bad if you wanted a fun night in with your roomie? andrea warned you several times to go to bed considering you'd be up at 5:30 the next morning, but you insisted that you'd be fine and asked her to help you clear the rest of the box-wine in the fridge.

you could tell matt was a little irritated that you chose rewatching episodes of a sitcom and "cheap ass box-wine" over sex with him (of course throwing the fact that his birthday would be arriving in only a few hours right in your face) but you pioneered and assured him that you'll make time for him the next day, while also sweetly reminding him that you too have a life outside of this exchange.

at midnight you sent the triplets a group message to congratulate. and a few minutes later you left andrea on the couch for your room, sending matt a birthday text of his own (because you did feel the tiniest bit guilty for rejecting him earlier) paired with a picture with your shirt lifted, hem tucked behind your teeth, and your boobs sat in a sheer bra with decorative white trimming and a bow in the center.

he didn't respond for almost an hour and you tried to not feel embarrassed or overthink his reaction at all.

you couldn't stand the giddiness that came over you (you'd blame it on being the slightest bit tipsy) when you finally got into bed to find his response gentle, in his own matt-kind-of-way, with your image loved and a grayed bubble text reading: "Very pretty, thank you"

"thanks, drea. they were a bitch to make." water drowns out your voice as you start to wash your hands in the deep sink. you run your soapy fingers over a small cut you got when dealing with an irritating cardboard box earlier, finding the stinging of the hot water a wonderful kind of bitter that further plays into your foul mood.

"mmm... i'm sure. but it's not like you can even tell. they almost look store-bought," she attempts to flatter you, turning her head from the packaged desserts to offer a smile.

when you're sweet you're the most ripe, juicy peach, eveyone knows this. but god, when you're feeling down you really are the most cranky, green apple that could force a pucker onto even the most undaunted. your face is dragged of any aloofness or sunshine with your dry response as she turns to resume her breakfast, "uh huh. you don't have to coddle me. i'll get over myself soon, i promise." you dry your hands.

andrea would argue she's not coddling only looking out for your well being- because she wants to and knows if she were neglecting her needs you'd be right on her ass as well, "okay...and did you eat?"

"just like, a bagel before i left," you open the fridge and let the door hang open as you walk across the kitchen to grab the cake boxes and set them inside. you make sure to mind your feet, noticing figaro nosily has his furry face lifted to sniff into the side door.

she strings some sarcasm into her sentiment, "oh yum." she pauses, letting the sizzle of the egg and (now faint) music linger in the air before she speaks again, "how about you go take a shower or do something that'll make you feel a little better?"

"you know i would but being around my favorite roommate is already making me feel sooo much better!" you deliver the dry joke with a smile and pick up figaro when you shut the fridge door with an accidental slam.

she turns to look at you over her shoulder as she grabs two glass plates for the both of you, scolding you like a mother (as she tended to transform into at times like this due to her essentially parenting her younger siblings) "y/n, you're only fighting yourself, go ahead now."

౨ৎ

matt can hear chris' voice only grow louder and pound against the hallway walls but assumes he is heading anywhere but the space that matt's in, deciding to continue brushing his teeth instead.

he'd only be so lucky on his birthday.

"but yeah-" chris interrupts himself to knock and barely wait for an answer before he walks into matt's sleek bathroom. "matt's here!" his phone is carelessly thrown in front of matt's face (with a frothing mouth and irritated eyes) before he has truly registered anything that has happened.

he truly wants to roll his eyes infinitely but when he sees his mother is the one on the phone, his grumpy front is quickly wilted and a glimmer kisses his spirit in a way only she could produce.

it's clear she hadn't expected matt to be in the middle of something as personal as brushing his teeth when she first sees him, "oh, hi matt!" she understands him well enough to know he absolutely hates this (this being chris unnecessarily close to him as he hunches over to keep matt's face in the camera) so she attempts to amuse him, "wow, you're really showing your age now, aren't you? just looking so put together and nice." she laughs to herself as matt tries to not smile whilst brushing, holding his index finger up to indicate that he would address her with words in only a moment.

"chris, honey, why'd you bring me to your brother when he's busy, anyway?! now we're just watchin' him brush his teeth and the angles you're givin' me are so awkward," she emphasizes her sentence as it goes on.

chris turns the phone back to himself, "because you told me to show him?!"

"no, i said 'where's matt?'" she corrects him in jest.

"okay, so am i incorrect in saying that there was an implication-?"

matt dries his face with a towel and grabs the phone scolding chris, "hey we get it, smartass-" he turns to look at her again with a smile, "sorry mom."

"mhm," she dismisses, "when's this party of yours starting?"

"soon i think," matt moves around chris to exit the bathroom, leaving chris (literally) in the dark.

"okay and how's your birthday been so far?" he smiles knowing how excited she's always been about these things.

"good, i don't feel any different. just doin' the same stuff, except today there's way more people sending me texts and pretending the care about me." matt places the phone against a bowl full of chips in the kitchen, waving when he notices chris followed him.

"get down here nick, mom's on the phone!" chris yells, coming into frame and leaning on the counter. "jeez, matt's masochism can't give any of us a break even on days literally made for our happiness. you hearin' this kid ma?"

matt shakes his head, pointing to chris with his handful of chips, "spell masochism."

chris' eyes pinch and before their mother or chris himself reply, nick is running over to them with a smile and yell of "im heree!!"

she's has the much-expected motherly urge to cry seeing her three sons (whom she rarely sees anymore) all in the same frame, "aw, hi nicky! just look at you boys...so sweet."

it only takes another second before she's crumbling in tears. their smiles drop as chris grabs his phone. they all begin spilling out the most comforting phrases they know to cheer her up.

౨ৎ

"okay people! cake is coming through! everyone move. move, move...precious cargo right here and your ass is in the way!" asha yells and shines her phone's flashlight into the faces in the crowded living room as she ushers the girls to the kitchen.

she earns a few glares that she happily dishes back and a few mumbles of "bitch" once she's walked past that has remi "accidentally" stepping on a certain people's shoes while following asha's lead.

the modern open kitchen hosts plenty of drinks and snacks as well as a worried nathan, who's shirt is barely on his torso from the amount of buttons he's undone since stepping foot in the wild space. "oh thank god the cake's are here," he sighs with a throw of his head before frantically moving a platter of chips and guac (that someone was actively eating from) and a few six packs from the island to the opposite counter, encouraging the girls to place them down with an awkward nod of his head and harsh blink of his eyes.

asha holds back a laugh at nate's odd vibe as she moves next to him, nudging his shoulder, "what's wrong with you?"

"nothing," his head whips to look at her, "well, i mean, think 'm just nervous." he starts slow but it seems he needed someone to finally prompt him to share such a frustrated rant, "like- chris comes to me and asks me to throw him the best party. yet he doesn't give me shit to work with besides his home to host it in-" he breathes, "and 'm feelin' all the pressure of planning a party right now but, you know, i just need things to go smooth and then i'll be fine..." he runs a hand through his hair, "you ladies don't worry about me." he fakes a smile and gives a small wave of his wrist to show just how "fine" he is.

coinciding with nate's rant, you've began to pour a hefty amount of vodka and lemon juice (you absolutely scoured the fridge for) into a large glass. you hand it off to andrea with a pleading "mix" as you lick the remaining lemon juice from your thumb and open cabinets to search for shot glasses.

you line up a multitude of shot glasses with various cities labeled on them as andrea pours the mixture in carefully. you immediately bring one up to nathan, "lemon drop?"

"yes, please. no way your a fucking bartender and baker?" nate's eyes widen as he receives the small glass.

"no, definitely not. just live with a girl whois always making her own drinks at home," you smile and grab your own glass as the rest of the girls follow suit.

"i need this right now," remi starts, "let's cheers to drea's DIY shit and nathan making it through the rest of the night!" she woops and the group all let out various chuckles.

"a-fuckin'-men!" nate leans to clink the small glasses softly before taking the shot quickly. he barely recovers from the shot before he's pouring more vodka into his glass and taking a second.

you get the best view of chris turning the corner and seeing you all (his reaction is more specifically for andrea) have arrived. his jaw hangs dramatically as he walks over but quickly turns to a big smile when the group all start to sing happy birthday to him. "stop it! stop it!" he jokes and begins to give out hugs and thank each of you for coming. he stops and squeezes you extra tight, bringing up the cakes sat nearby, "i know that bakery anywhere. thank you for my cake."

"of course, i had to," you smile.

"no seriously, you're fuckin' awesome, girl." you can tell he's already a little buzzed from the look in his eyes but you also know he's almost more truthful than ever when drunk.

you notice that when he leaves you to finally greet your roommate, it's very clear he's purposely left andrea last to ensure there would be no rush on his interaction.

the rest of the group leave them to their own world for a moment; as the two hug chris gives her a soft kiss on her forehead, whispering "hi, mi cariña (my darling)" an inside joke between the two of them as chris' struggle with speaking spanish never fails to make andrea laugh.

౨ৎ

"okay, okay, i'll do it," matt finally gives in, lifting himself off of the black couch with people piled on top of it. he hands his drink over to elijah smoothly and begins to playfully rub his hands together.

"'hold my beer' headass," elijah jokes placing the cup off on a side table next to him. matt stops any movement, turning his torso to look back at the boy and start to laugh while holding both middle fingers up.

"matt," erin taps him with the side of her arm twice to get his attention again, handing him the second wii remote in her hands. the screen appears extra bright in contrast to the dimness of the room which causes matt to wonder how the fuck anyone has managed to play just dance in this space without getting a sudden head rush or worse.

"okay, let's do timber because it's classic," she suggests.

"let's not," matt opposes, his hand covering his mouth to hide a grin before running his cursor over the other choices.

erin looks over to him with a blank expression, "i mean i don't care that much you can-"

"'m joking, we'll do timber," matt looks from her to the colorful screen to find the song once more.

when he notices she's stiil looking over at him with an unreadable expression, matt smiles big attempting to not laugh, causing his already-slim eyes to pinch a little extra as he turns to her, "hey e, the screen's right up there, you won't be getting much direction from starin' at me-" he breaks into obnoxious laughter mid-way through his sentence which earns him a small smack on the arm.

erin laughs a little now, "would you stop it? just click 'a' on your fucking remote."

he does as she says and looks to her as the screen loads, "thereee we go, you can cool down now, sweetheart."

as the two dance both matt and his friends make one-off comments and jokes about the many times matt almost fell (and would make sure to blame it on the rug or his shoes). they seem to be having such a great time that you don't know if you only being there for the final few lines of the song, watching erin ride matt's back as they spin in circles laughing, is fortunate or unfortunate.

the claps and whistles are wild when the two finish with a bow, the crowd around them only getting louder when matt teases that he's so hot he might have to take off his shirt, lifting it slightly then putting it back down and calling them pervs. you only shake your head and bite back a smile, hating how fucking charming he is when he allows himself to be completely lost in a good time.

matt would say you snuck onto the sectional couch- because a minute ago you weren't there and now here you are talking elijah's ear off and taking repeated hits of his blunt.

but you wouldn't say you snuck into his area, rather walked in a manner in which you'd be out of his and erin's way- of course not taking away from the birthday boy and his...good friend. so you're a bit surprised he slumps on the couch next to you and not in his original spot on the opposite side of eli, "sunnnyy," he huffs and leans his head back against the couch, "when'd you get here, huh?"

you turn to look at him and he smiles at you then looks up to the ceiling, "think an hour ago? maybe?" you hand him the blunt.

"cool, cool, cool..." matt repeats cutting himself off by placing it in his mouth. he's dressed so stylish and attractive you can't help but scan over him with your eyes; his jersey-style shirt showing off his armfuls of tattoos, baggy jeans, car keys hanging on a cheetah print clip attached to his belt loop, shoes that look straight out of the box, a matching hat that you honestly wish he'd take off, and his signature silver jewelry brightening his attributes in the otherwise dark room.

he makes the slightest "tsss" sound when breathing in the drug before speaking with smoke plummeting from his mouth, "you should dance next," he brings it back to his mouth for a final hit.

"mmm maybe...if lucas is up for it," you play with the metal can of a wine cooler that you hold on your bare knee as matt leans over you to hand an occupied eli his blunt back, his laugh trails smoke out of his mouth and into your face as he slouches back next to you.

"forgot you're fuckin, hilarious! holy shit." his hand makes its way up his own shirt to rest on his stomach as he giggles.

a smile grows on your face, "no seriously is he here?" you lift yourself up a little and pretend to look for the familiar face.

"stop that." matt chuckles and tugs your wrist gently. you almost get nervous this time when you look him in the eyes. when he's drunk, matt is so carefree and giggly in a way you rarely get to see. and now you’re starting to notice how the poor lighting makes his features appear arched and his face look carved into, yet the jagged becomes soft and fuzzy whenever the gumdrop-colored lights of the wii game hit his face with the beat of the song. he notices your staring and lets go of your wrist, "what's up?"

"nothing."

"excuse me everyone! i would like to give a speech! hello, i am giving a speechhh! everyone shut up, please!" nick projects his voice into the microphone- he stole from the karaoke machine -while standing on a dining room chair.

as people start to calm down nick speaks, "right, so, it's my fuckin' birthday!” he raises his arms and dances his fingers before pointing out matt, “and it's matt's fuckin' birthday, right over there! let's get some flashlights pointing over to my brother please!" matt’s face flushes as he covers his eyes from the sudden bright lights. you squint your own eyes from next to him and move closer to eli to avoid the flashes.

"and it's chris' fuckin' birthday..." nick looks around, "i couldn't tell you where exactly he is, just know that he is also here tonight!” the crowd roars, “anyway... i'm so- so happy to have you all with us tonight to celebrate. we turn twenty fucking three and... that feels so old saying it out loud. holy shit." nick cringes obnoxiously, slurring his next few words, "but i love my two best friends in the whole world: chris and matt, i wouldn’t wish to share a birthday with anyone else… and i love all of you thank you again. oh! and shout out nathan for holding this shit down! if you see nathan give him something... i don't know- money? a kiss? a drink? fuck if i know." as nick speaks cameron nudges him with a shot glass which he finally acknowledges, "and apparently this is a toast now so, you know, here's to getting older and having the most fun forever!" he raises the glass in the air and drinks it without further thought, inviting everyone to do the same while cheering and applauding him in excitement.

you raise your wine cooler and let out many cheers along with the rest, but of course matt ridicules you a little in jest, "really? you sit here and 'woo' while i'm going blind?!" he’s still wiping at his eyes, dealing with the aftermath of bright lights shining in his eyes; his vision tainted with faint blue and red splotches only for a second. you lean closer to him, attempting to see his eyes better while uncontrollably laughing.

"are you crying?!"

matt thinks you look really pretty even when you're quite literally pointing and laughing in his face. you move his hands away from his face and he widens his eyes dramatically, "look, no 'm not!” you shake your head in response, “does really it look like it?"

you notice his bottom eyelashes are slightly clumped and you move your hand closer, placing your thumb under his eye, "baby, that's damp!" you giggle and pull his hand close, using your thumb to draw a wet line across his tattooed wrist to prove your point.

he drags out his first word, "alrighttt. whatever! you got me, sweet girl. ‘cause god forbid i have the ability to cry?!” pulling away from you with a smile as he dries his eyes by rubbing them gently.

matt excuses himself with a quick "gonna go grab another drink or somethin'" before he does something irrational like kiss you in front of all these fucking people.

౨ৎ

you carefully open each of the packaged cakes, each revealing the boys' full names written in cursive with the uniquely styled and colored buttercream frosting you made that very morning. you used the same shades to make the puffed frosting border of the cakes, for an easy, soft garnish. remi follows behind you, lighting candles on the cakes as you go.

there's a chaos that comes with trying to gather this many (drunk) people in one area and capture their attention long enough to sing then cut cakes. it doesn’t help that the hosts are at their most unserious themselves; matt and nick both snickering and making jokes while holding onto each other while chris talks to one of his friends off to the side with his obnoxiously loud voice without regard for anyone around him.

“okay, people we’re singing!” nathan attempts to yell over the loudness of the crowded room. you and remi are then in the position of getting the attention of the birthday boys who can’t focus on the task at hand, leaving you both to snap your fingers and call them as if you were attempting to take photos of a stubborn baby.

you truly wish it didn’t irk you so terribly but you can’t help your annoyance when matt looks over to erin after she shouts from next to you, “matt, can you pay attention? your cake’s ready,” and he listens, moving nick off of him with a shoulder nudge and laugh as he approaches the row of cakes.

you recover quickly with a smile once both matt and nick’s eyes widen and mouths hang open in awe of your hard work, “s’perfect,” matt whispers to himself, now adjusting his hat to fit backwards.

“oh my god, the wax got in my cake! what the fuck,” nick whines and that cues drea to tug chris’ arm softly and urge him with a hushed, “chris ven aquí (come here)!”

and he's is down so terribly that he moves to where she wants him immediately.

chris is a known sap, especially when wasted, so he’s stood fighting the urge to cry when taking in the scene in front of him: his brothers and friends gathered together to celebrate their twenty three years of life together.

he tucks his lip into his mouth and looks down at the burning flame, slowly smiling when everyone around them begin to sing a rendition of happy birthday with all the charmingly bad high notes and run on “you”s but not forgetting to crunch all three names into a single line.

midway through the song, chris leans to hug matt in comfort while sneaking a reach into matt’s back pocket to grab the slim joint he just knew would be there. he grins to himself, “sweet! free j and free light,” placing it into his mouth as he leans over his cake to spark the joint hanging in his mouth with as much precision as possible. andrea shakes her head in confusion while filming on her phone beside to you.

“dude,” matt lets out a breathy laugh while waving his hand to clear the atmosphere of the potent smoke. sudden applause recognizing the end of the song and leading the three to blow out their candles.

matt gave up on birthday wishes a while into his teen years and nothing changes this year; he blows his candles out and claps along with the crowd before accepting his joint from chris for a few puffs of celebration.

you watch in amusement as nathan distracts the boys with shots to get them away from the cakes as andrea begins to cut. except no shot could beat the view of andrea bent over the counter like she is now, so chris is practically on top of drea with annoying whines of “i wanna see,” when she asks him to be careful and wait a second.

you, however, are actively searching for the spiked punch that elijah recommended when you run into erin and matt talking. they both look to you with different expressions as you squeeze yourself by them to get to the punch bowl.

you remind yourself that erin is your friend, not your enemy. nor your competition. meaning you also have to remind yourself that matt is some guy you fuck around with, not your boyfriend.

you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding in while grabbing a plastic cup and using a small ladle to pour the peach colored liquid for yourself. instead of flat-out staring at the two, you take turns looking from them to your cup. you watch as they pose for a picture; erin taking his hat to place on her own head and matt smiling next to her. and another with her kissing his cheek as he laughs.

it’s upsetting- no, humiliating to you. and how especially humiliating that your first thought is whether he’ll dismiss you for erin when you ask him to fuck you later tonight? you blame the weed for getting you so worked up over minutiae interactions.

you’re brought out of your daze in the most humbling of ways: a sudden splash hits your bare foot and covers your black kitten heels in the sticky juice. “fuck,” you groan and place the ladle back into the punch bowl, taking a large sip of your overflowing drink as you look down at the puddle of pink you’re standing in.

you find a towel laying nearby and lower yourself to fumble and wipe your shoe.

“damn y/n, you like my punch that much?” a voice asks from next to you.

you look up and see lucas smiling down at you, “you made it?” you ask genuinely as he helps you rise to standing again.

“no,” he smiles and you roll your eyes, “but im wondering how you managed to spill any with this itty bitty fucking ladle?” he jokes, lifting the ladle and watching it pour the small bit of juice it managed to gather back into the bowl.

“i just wasn’t paying attention,” you laugh and sip your drink again.

“mhm…why’s that?” he squints his eyes down at you.

you tap two of your french tip fingernails against your skull, “so much is happening up here.”

“like what?”

“i don’t knowww,” you smirk and look away to take another sip of your drink.

“well, i know you look sexy as fuck in this dress right now. look at you,” he wets his lips and offers his hand to you with a grin, showing off a few of his shining tooth gems.

you try to maintain your composure and not smile too big but it’s a challenge when he playfully gets you to spin slowly for him and show off the tiny strapless dress you have on as he “oouu”s and whistles to hype you up.

“mm, you like that?” you look up at him, blinking slowly.

he nods and chuckles, “you know damn well-” looking off to the side then gaining your eye contact once more as he wipes over his mouth with his hand, glancing over your body, “‘course i do.”

"good. we should dance then," you guide him to the living room with his hand still in yours.

౨ৎ

you hate to be the bitch on her phone at a party but you can’t stop staring at it. you tap past the story then go back to look again. you even rewatch it in the perspective of someone who hadn’t been there to see the photo taken to see how it would be perceived. hurting your own feelings knowing they could very well assume matt to be erin’s boyfriend with how close they’re standing and her lips against his face.

it’s very dizzying and ruining your high quite a bit, especially paired with andrea who continues to look to you to celebrate after every ping pong ball she throws whether she makes it or not.

you go to rewatch the story once more, only this time a text from matt slides down on your screen to interrupt your sulking:

MATT

Hey come here

Y/N

where???

MATT

Outside youll see me

you let andrea know you’re going outside for air before walking over to a glass sliding door to let yourself out.

you see matt holding a stick while looking down at his phone, fire pit radiating next to him, a mass of people surrounding it.

your arms wrap and hold onto your shoulders as you walk closer, feeling the breeze rack through your body despite the internal heat from the many drinks you've had over the course of the night.

as you approach, asha gets up from her spot on nick's lap to give you a hug, "y/n! hiii." she pulls away and her hands remain on your shoulders, "your cake was so delicious, i tried a bite of each."

"oh good, 'm glad." you smile.

she feels your hands, "are you cold, babe? come sit." she guides you over to the group of people sat around the fire. "you can take my spot, i'll stand," she insists and nick agrees smiling kindly.

you interrupt matt's texting to figure out why he wanted you here, cupping your hands to shout, "matt!" across the lawn from your spot atop nick.

he looks over and quips his head while moving closer, "hey, was just wonderin' if you'd try my s'more? nick thinks he makes them best." he smiles but you can't help but feel that there's a catch to this.

"always gotta prove someone wrong. yeah, i'll do it." you agree as he moves to grab the snack he'd apparently already prepared.

nick mutters, "don't let him bully you into liking his, and don't forget who's acting as your chair currently!" from behind you as you giggle into the bite that matt gives you, holding the smore in his hand up to your mouth.

you chew slowly and matt watches, chatter and crinkles of the fire filling the heated space. you finally nod your head and matt smirks, "so good, right?" matt asks and brings his hand to hold your face and wipe around the corner of your mouth, looking to his right with a smile then back to you.

you feel awkwardly and unnaturally sensual, moving his hand away from your face and searching for what he's looked over to, catching the eye of lucas, standing with a group of guys lighting up near a fence. so that is the fucking catch.

you lick your lips of any remaining marshmallow and shake your head, annoyed, "i don't know, it tastes normal and graham cracker is fucking stale." you look up at him and his face is adorned with confusion on your change of heart.

you feel too fucking weird about this. you wish you couldn't believe that he'd use your feelings towards him for some weird shit like claiming you from lucas, but it's not surprising in the slightest; matt wants his cake yet he'll always want to eat it too.

"yeah, nick wins." you pat the side of nick's thigh to grab his attention and tell him the news, making him cheer and bring you into his chest for a small hug.

matt's lips form the smallest pucker as he watches you get up and walk towards the house without further conversation.

"bye, y/n!" asha yells.

౨ৎ

matt lays flat on his bed, staring up at the ceiling to try and organize his many thoughts when his door creaks slightly, allowing a roar of party chatter into his space before it shuts again.

he lifts only his head up to see erin stood with a small smile before letting himself fall back into his plush comforter, "hey, i got your shit in the first drawer over there." he points to a tall dresser across the room.

he listens to her shuffle around before finding a large bag of weed, coming close to him and placing a few folded bills in his front pocket slowly. she then moves so that she hovers over his dazed face, "thank you, are you sure you don't need anything else from me? it is your birthday..." she grins and runs a hand over his chest. he mimics her smile (intended in more of a mocking way than she takes it) and laughs softly.

"no, i'm good on that, e. you enjoy your doobies and shit," he continues to softly laugh, eyes crinkling at the sides before she thanks him again and gives him a small peck.

"happy birthday, matty!" she sings before closing the door to his room and heading straight to his bathroom next door to pee.

matt would say it hasn't even been four minutes since erin left him when you're stumbling into his room. he repeats his look up, only to soften a bit when he sees you make effort to move some of his shoes out of the walkway so that you don't trip, "hi, baby" he waves you over with his fingers and welcomes you as if you'll be staying for long, "lock that door for me." he figures if you came to see him after storming away like that at the fire pit you're either gonna spit your thoughts in his face or sit on his face, there's no in between.

"i found you," you smile and twist the smaller knob to lock the door from the rowdiness. you then make your way over to sit at the end of his bed and begin to fiddle with the straps on your tiny heels, "my feet have been achin' so bad," you look at him as you complain.

"mm, i'm sure."

when your feet are finally free from your shoes you place them on the ground and adjust yourself on the bed. you silently grimace seeing matt with his shoes remaining on his feet despite being on his bed.

he giggles when you begin to unlace them, "feel like a fuckin' princess."

you roll your eyes and begin to pull them off, "with the way you act you might as well be one."

"ouch? it's my birthday," he holds his heart while looking to you playfully.

you tilt your head and drop his second shoe right on the floor as you stare back at him, "oh, i know."

"right. what's wrong now?"

you run your hands along his legs as you inch up his body and hover yourself over his crotch, "nothing. everything's fine, right?" you adjust your hair away from your face.

"sure, uh huh," matt looks up at you and bites his lower lip while moving his hands to hold and squeeze your full thighs. he silently admires the way you fill that tiny dress and look down at him from this angle.

you look away for a moment then decide to put your full weight onto matt, muffled groan leaving his mouth. your lips curve up as you pull his bottom lip from his mouth with your thumb to replace it with your mouth, sucking and kissing it. your tongue runs over his lips a few times before matt takes hold of your head and pulls you impossibly closer to capture your mouth messily with his own.

the kiss is a filthy, drunken sight: noses meshing and colliding, tongues playing and licking, and moans escaping and ringing into the air desperately.

you pull away with a wet smack and whisper into his lips, "i've got another present for you..."

"mmm?" his eyes widen and he squeezes your neck gently, kissing you once more, "for real? like, more than this?!" his hand feathers over your ass, insinuating the way you're sat on top of him right now could easily be his best gift tonight.

"yes," you breathe then begin to giggle, "you're gonna lose your shit, i think."

his mind can think of a lot of things you could do to make him lose his shit, "damn, okay. well, show me. you got my stomach dancin' and shit." he holds you so that you stay put as he lifts himself to rest on his elbows.

your smile bites over your bottom lip now as you raise yourself from his lap once more. your nail taps against your upper thigh as you look down at him, "kiss, please?"

he doesn't have to move much, as your leg is already so close to his face. he keeps heated eye contact with you when he kisses and marks the skin you'd point to, causing small mindless noises to fall from your mouth as you play with his soft hair (that you unfortunately hadn't seen much of tonight).

when he's finished he looks up to you with his red, puffy eyes and wet lips as you thank him, "now...pay attention." you gently demand as you slowly move your dress up your body.

matt studies your movement in awe, eventually catching your gift in his line of sight. he knows you must think you're so sneaky when you only show a glimmer of your lacy white panties, with a cursive red "M" embroidered near the waistband, before quickly pushing your dress back down with an uncontrollable laugh.

matt's face morphs to express a million different emotions and he doesn't realize how loud his voice is when he speaks, "what the fuck?!" he looks up at you- with your head thrown back laughing -then back to your covered lower half. "what was that? hold the fuck on," you body is so loose with laughter that he easily grabs you and flips you onto the bed so that you lay underneath him, still squirming in your own giggles (yelling a few "matt!"s or "matt wait i can't breathe!"s).

his face is full of amusement when he firmly lifts your dress to get a better look at what you've done for him. "oh my god, 'm gonna pass the fuck out. look at you, sunny!" he rubs his eyes dramatically and shakes his head. "no, you're so bad."

"you like it?" you ask, licking over your lips and reaching your hands up to trace the small hairs prickling on matt's jawline.

"course i do, the fuck type of question is that?!" he turns his face to kiss your inner palm before bending closer to kiss your lips once more.

"happy birthday, matt." you say in between kisses, "there's somethin' else if you look a little more."

"really?" he immediately splits from you and looks to your panties once more, running his hands over your lower stomach. the cherry red joint laying against your hip and tucked into your underwear catches him by surprise but the stoner in him nearly cums on the spot.

he removes it from it's place and kisses you mumbling a reminder that "you're so hot" and "the marijuana bug must've bit you real bad" before he gets up to store it in his bedside table, patting the closed drawer and joking, "for when i miss you."

he stands above you for an extra second to shake his head slowly with a tut, but when you whine "c'mereee," he's hushing you and removing his shirt before crawling back on top of you.

your hands run across every inch of his warm torso as you both sloppily kiss, and matt's own hands curiously make their way into your underwear for a proper feel of your wet core.

he allows you to desperately grind your hips against his hand until he eventually decides he needs to taste you. he lowers himself to face your clothed pussy, tracing the "M" with a finger as he places his tongue flat against you and places pressure on your most sensitive area.

his finger once tracing, now moves to pull the tiny piece of fabric off of you. he looks into your eyes as he easily stuffs the cloth in his back pocket, mumbling "mine now" while moving his fingers through your sticky folds.

you cry out when he dips two fingers into you teasingly, over and over again, and another series of moans leaves your mouth when he begins to lick over your clit eagerly.

matt continues his efforts, spitting on your clit a few times to watch it drip down to where his fingers harshly move inside of you; his movements quickening while he watches.

and just before you cum you dumbly warn him, which makes him stop entirely. "no, matt. stop, please come back. please."

"shhh. don't start that shit, you'll cum twice on your day..." he unbuttons his pants, "plus, you know it feels so much better when you wait and have to chase it a few times." he smirks and nudges your clit with his finger once more making you breathe out a moan and close your legs around his hand.

he pulls away from you to finish undressing before laying back dowm in his tight boxers, "come take care of me, sunny. i need you."

"hm...and i needed you too..." you lift yourself up and pout as you climb off the bed and get closer to where he lies, turning and moving your hair away for your back, "unzip me, please?"

he does just as you say and watches you finish removing your dress in only one movement. when you climb on top of him he now gets a view of your tits directly in his face that has him humming and immediately feeling you up.

he kisses and licks the skin while you scratch at his scalp in the most sensual way. you reach behind you to dip your hand into his boxers, immediately coming in contact with his sensitive and slightly sticky tip. he tilts his head back with a groan as soon as you begin to stroke him beneath the fabric making a sinical smile form on your face.

you push the boxers further down his thighs to fully expose him as you bring your lips down to him again. his moans flow into your mouth when you repeatedly rush your movements then slowly circle his head.

eventually matt's eyebrows pinch in terribly tight and he grabs your hand, sighing, "god damn, baby. chill or i'll be cummin' before i'm inside you."

you roll your eyes playfully, "okay?" as you adjust yourself to align over his length, before sinking down on top of him.

"mmm, fuck." he encourages when you lift yourself and slam back down on top of him. you move his hands to hold your hips then spread your hands over his chest as you continue.

matt can't help but slap your ass a few times after discovering the way your muscles flutter around him so perfectly each time. but one smack in particular aids you to practically fall onto his chest whining, "matt i can't, please just-."

he immediately lifts your face to give him a much needed kiss before reaching to realign himself and hold onto you as he thrusts rhythmically into you.

moans sneak from your mouth and interrupt you from kissing and holding onto matt's neck, which only encourage matt until he's completely flustered and drilling into you sloppily.

matt can tell you're cumming by your all too and familiar broken moans. and once you harshly kiss him and ask him to let go in return he finally stills inside of you and groans into your soft shoulder.

a silence coats the room, leaving the overpowering music and talking of the party to linger through the air in a cloudy murmur.

matt keeps his arms around you while you recover from your high, staring at the ceiling of his faintly lit room in questionable thought.

and he assumes you must be doing the same; only he mistakes the wetness of your tears for his own sweat as you turn your head away from him to dissolve your embarrassingly shaky breaths.

꩜⋆ ˚｡⋆🎱˚

tag list is in the replies ily!!!!

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hotvintagepoll · 4 months

Note

NEED to know which poll you think is a grave injustice 👀👀👀

As poll administrator, I'm not allowed to have opinions. I must not sway the tournament or influence others' decisions in any way. I am very careful about this. however.

CAGNEY. CAGNEY. IT'S CAGNEY. I CAN FINALLY SAY IT BECAUSE ROUND 1 IS OVER AND AS ADMIN I'M FREE TO HAVE OPINIONS NOW

YOU GUYS DITCHED CAGNEY??? I WAS GOING TO SET HIM UP WITH LAURENCE OLIVIER ORIGINALLY! I WAS LIKE! THAT'S FAIR! EYELINER VS GANGSTER! BUT NO, WAIT, THIS GETS RID OF TWO GOOD MEN TOO EARLY—THEY SHOULD WAIT TIL A LATER BRACKET—I CAN'T LOSE TOO MANY GOOD HOTTIES TOO EARLY!

SO I SET LAURENCE UP WITH ROONEY OF ALL PEOPLE, AND I SAY, YOU KNOW WHAT, I'LL GIVE CAGNEY BING. THAT FEELS FAIR! THERE'S A CHANCE THE WHITE CHRISTMAS PEOPLE WILL SHOW UP FOR BING, WE'LL HAVE A NICE FAIR COMPETITION, CAGNEY WILL CONTINUE ON AND BING WILL HAVE GOTTEN OUT, SEEN THE FLOWERS, SMELLED THE SWEET FRESH AIR BUT NOTHING DRASTIC

AND THEN WHAT DO I SEE???? WHAT DO I SEE???????? YOU PEOPLE VOTE FOR BING??????????? THE SEARCH ENGINE????? NOW I WON'T HAVE NEGATIVE PROPAGANDA ABOUT ANY CONTESTANT! BUT!! JAMES CAGNEY!!! WAS RIGHT THERE!!!! DID THE TAP DANCING MEAN NOTHING TO YOU? THE EVIL ANTICS? THE WAY HE'S FUCKED UP BUT LIKE. IN A LOVABLE WAY? I'VE BARELY EVEN SEEN A CAGNEY MOVIE AND I KNOW HIS HOTNESS IS TRANSCENDENT LEVELS!! HE CAN YANKEE MY DOODLE DANDY ANYTIME HE PLEASES!!!! MEANWHILE OLIVIER IS USING MICKEY ROONEY AS A MOP!!!!!! THE WHOLE BRACKET'S GONE TO HELL IN A HANDBASKET AND MY GLORIOUS EYELINER'D TAPDANCING EVIL GANGSTER MAN HAS BEEN LEFT IN THE DUST BY A JAZZ SINGER ! ! ! ! ! !! ! ! ! !!!!!!!

#asks #anyway on the outside i am very very calm.#and yes for the shadow bracket i don't care if i influence it. it's the shadow bracket. it does what it wants in its evil ways #anyway. a grave injustice. i was clearly fine and normal about it #james cagney

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insomniac-101 · 1 year

Text

So something that I often don't see people discuss is the manner in which the 9th and the 10th doctor's seasons are so intrinsically connected that it is almost impossible to understand a lot of key character arcs if you choose to skip it upon rewatch. The reason why I say this is because the moment you reach season 2, 10 is essentially the product of the development 9 achieves at the end of his season. To skip him, would mean that you also miss context as to the reason why Rose is so important and in turn, not understand the reason why their bond in particular is such a big part of the plot during the 10th's era.

Now bare with me, because I'm about to go off a bit lmao.

The first season of nuwho not only serves as an introduction to many of the key characters we see later on, such as: the Doctor, Rose, Jackie, Jack, Mickey, Harriet jones, etc. but it also serves as an introduction for the concept of the series as a whole. Prior to this, doctor who as a franchise had a reputation of being a geeky sci-fi show with no real wide spread appeal. Remaining as a niche interest to many, up until the reboot returned and reintroduced the show to a newer audience.

This is important to note because this is one of the main reasons why we see such a huge emphasis placed on the companions' lives in the reboot. Because RTD meant to expand the world of Doctor who and its audience, and by doing so, he strived to try a multitude of new plots that were otherwise never explored previously. This is why the romantic plotline of his season is so crucial to the story itself because he means to explore a facet of humanity not previously seen with the Doctor as a character. RTD essentially built this plot line from scratch, as the only other attempt at exploring such an angle was received negatively (The 8th Doctor's movie). So there's a degree of leniency that I give his writing In particular because like I said prior, he had no prior reference for exploring humanity to the degree in which the new series does.

The ninth doctor, when we meet him, is essentially a recluse. He is in a state of stagnation, implied to have been alone for some time after the war and it gives off the impression that he's no longer accustomed to being around people. He's often direct, rudely so and very standoffish to anyone that isn't immediately measuring up to his standards. This isn't to say that he isn't charming in his own way. He's sarcastic and when he tries, he can actually be very good with people. But the war still weighs heavily on his conscious and so, he views the world through the eyes of a soldier. Prioritizing the act of surviving rather than slowing down and actually taking the time to live life.

I mean, the man essentially meets Rose while blowing up her workplace and if that isn't concerning on its own merit than I don't know what is lmao.

A scene that sticks out to me the most about him in particular is when he looks at himself in the mirror for the first time. He notes that he has big ears, and from the manner in which he says it the implication that he perhaps has not seen himself in a long time is not lost to us. This coupled with the knowledge that he had indeed been seen traveling prior to meeting Rose, gives the phrase a more dark connotation that makes sense for his character.

I like to think that this indicates that the guilt of what he did to stop the war weighs so heavily on him that he could never bring himself to face his reflection. Because truly, to have gone so long without seeing yourself, not even in the reflection of a window or other surface is not something that is easy to do. Rather, it is something you have to go out of your way to do. Also it's important to note that his appearance is in fact a reflection of that weariness he feels. With his body, being older outwardly (appearing 40ish ) and his features being very sharp and serious. Even his hair is pretty short, much like how a soldier would keep it as a means of not wasting any time on worrying on something so inconvenient. His preference for darker colors and his constant outfit is also very noticably practical, not at all decorative like his prior bodies. This is purposeful, because it is what sets him apart from prior versions of the character and an easy way to visually see his most prominent traits.

Now with that out of the way, now I can discuss how 9 changes and what his relationship to Rose is like, so that one can better understand why Rose is such an important part of the Doctor's character.

From the moment the two meet, you can see he harbors an immediate curiosity towards her. Here they are, trapped in an elevator being attacked by a group of living mannequins and yet, Rose is almost unaffected.

That isn't to say she isn't afraid, she is, but her fear doesn't stop her from asking questions and demanding explanations. She doesn't shy away from him, rather she confronts him head on and even shows a level of concern for other people while she is actively the one in danger. It is enough to prompt him to ask her name, but not enough to involve her. Preferring to instead keep his distance.

It is not until another chance meeting that he gradually lets her in, allowing her to humor him with her curiosity and we see once more that he is in fact very good at socializing, but only with certain people. The reason why I stress this is because he often outwardly puts this front of coldness towards those that don't interest him. Rose was able to look past this front, and seems to look past his rather cold attitude towards other humans. He often stresses how inept they are, going on tangents about how they're nothing more than apes but she ignores it and tries to get at the core of the issue. That's why they mesh so well, because she is able to separate the fluff he inserts into his answers and take it for what it is. That isn't to say she's a doormat, she just knows when to pick her battles.

"do you know like we were saying? About the world revolving. It's like you're a kid, the first time they tell you that the world is turning and you just can't quite believe it cause everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. The turn of the earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning 1,000 miles an hour and the entire planet is hurtling round the sun at 67,00 miles an hour. And I can feel it, we're falling through space you and me. Clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go.. that's who I am. Now forget me, Rose Tyler"

He is describing the manner in which he views the world. Unlike how a kid is unable to comprehend the vast truths of how the world functions and remains naive of it for a period of time, he is a man that was never given that chance to be unaware of how it functions to an infuriating degree. He sees the world for how it is, dark, unforgiving and so direct. Everything is calculated so precisely and he can't even begin to comprehend why anyone would see the good in it as it's just that, a planet.

But that's why he finds humans so interesting. There's a part of him that holds onto that hope that it is something more, that perhaps he is missing out on a purpose behind all the darkness. That's why he is running amongst them, to find a reason behind their way of thinking. To experience the world through the eyes of the hypothetical child, rather than the adult who breaks the illusion.

Not only that, but this conversation also let's us in on how touch-deprived he is.

For it is in a moment of vulnerability that he allows himself to reach out and touch Rose physically. Grabbing her hand for emphasis on how heavy this revelation burdens him. It's a cry for help in a sense, because he has reached the point where he has metaphorically "let go". Dropping her hand, to show that he is losing that last part of him that clings to that hope of finding something that will allow him to question his view of the world. He is miserable and lonely, because when you view the world through such a cynical lens it becomes all the more apparent that life is so lonely. If everything is doomed, then why go out of your way to care?

You see this in the way he remains unaffected by the reveal of Mickey's "death." Having grown so used to it, that he finds it off-putting to see that Rose is freaking out as a result. It happens everyday to people far more important so why give it any real weight if it's inevitable? Why ascribe a meaning to something that just is?

Remember when I mentioned it is implied that he was traveling on his own for a while? What places did he visit? The Titanic, the Kennedy assassination, the explosion of Karakota. These are all fixed points of time that are associated with absolute tragedies. But all the same, they're key points in life where the world remained cruel without reason. Thus fueling his very uncharitable view of the world and how it functions.

That's where Rose becomes key to his overall development. As a human, she inevitably views the world through the lens of that child. She doesn't know the ins and outs of the universe's processes, yet she continues living without ever really seeking to understand it better. It doesn't matter to her that the people around her aren't necessarily important in the grand scheme of things, they matter because they just do. She is capable of loving others and affording care to others simply because she wants to, not because she has to. She is confronted with alien threats the moment he walks into her life, and yet her view of the world and her existence doesn't really change. She does not harden rather, she curiously grows from it. Growing wiser and more aware rather than crippling under the discovery of another threat in the universe.

She is clinging to the understanding of the tiny little world she lives in, yet her hold doesn't relent. For she is not falling, to imply so would mean that he was right in his assertion that our existence is doomed. No, instead in the place of any real meaningful explanation about the world's existence is something so innately human: hope. An illogical thing to always maintain, yet she always seems to have it.

After all, it is such a confusing notion when you think about it. We have no reason to believe that things will improve, and that we'll be met with good outcomes. It's so metaphorical, not at all tethered to something practical like numbers and data and yet, even when the odds are against us, somehow we hope things will improve.

It's that aspect that he wishes he understood.

(i would love to dedicate a whole analysis on Rose in a separate post so for now, I will only focus on the Doctor and her role in his life)

This is why he takes her to the ends of the universe on their first trip. He's testing her, seeing if this will be enough to prompt a reaction out of her that fits his narrative. He also seeks companionship, to have someone understand what it's like to see your planet burn and to have yourself remain as the sole survivor. In a way, to justify the validity of his misery and guilt. She's affected of course. It's in that moment that she realizes, the scope of the universe and is faced with the undeniable truth that everything does end. It shakes her and you can see her sort of doubt her view of the world. No longer able to remain blissfully unaware of the big picture when it is quite literally in your face.

But something she has, and he lacks is a foundation. Rose still has her mother, someone to return to at the end of the day. She can be comforted by the people in her life while his inability to let anyone in, essentially stunts him.

When given the choice to spare Cassandra, he refuses. He lacks the capability of seeing past the evil, and assumes that there is no good in her. No second chances. An act that catches Rose off guard, who in spite of personally recieving the brunt of Cassandra's cruelty, she asks the Doctor to save her.

Eventually he takes her back to her time. He entrusts her with more information regarding the war and the death of his people. People pass them by, oblivious to his presence as he is wallowing in the sorrow of remembering. It's a metaphor, of sorts. While our two protagonists are brutally aware of the doom that awaits them in the future and they remain stuck in place reminiscing, the world around them continues moving on.

He is giving her every reason to run, to leave him behind and save the very last shreds of naivety she has.

But when he asks her if she wants to leave, to no longer accompany him on his adventures, she refuses. Because his confession puts it all into perspective.

He is hurting.

He desperately craves company: to have a hand to hold onto and keep him grounded as the world falls apart. Yet more than ever is she aware of her limitations; that she cannot undo what has been done to him.

And so, she does what she knows she can do to help ease the pain even if it is very miniscule. Tells him that he has her, and that his pain is one she can now share and understand. She offers him chips, not because it will magically make it all disappear but because it will distract him from the pain of remembering. It's also her favorite food, so no doubt she is trying to share that sense of comfort it brings her with him.

Such a human thing to not focus on fixing the bigger problem and instead focus on what can be changed in the current moment. They still have time until the end of the earth, so why spend more time dwelling on it?

That is her response to his question.

I believe the episode the unquiet dead is where he realizes the extent of his feelings for her. There they are about to be pulled apart by a horde of zombies yet Rose doesn't regret coming along. She tells him so and in the end all she asks of him is that they fight for their lives. Still clinging on to that bit of hope that they could get out of this, even if it is misplaced. To stay together in spite of their inevitable deaths is all she asks for, and he in turn tells her how glad he is to have met her. Assuring her that he is glad it's her that is there by his side as he clings to her hand like a life line. Somehow, having someone there to hold made the inevitable more bearable.

For a single moment, he remembers what it is like to not regret something.

But no, they live! Again and again, even if logically it makes no sense given how the world works. All the while, he meets more and more extraordinary people. With Rose, always reaching out to others as they embark on every new adventure. Thus indirectly providing him insight on the manner in which normal people are capable of doing brave and incredible acts even if it is at the cost of their own life. Their hope in a future for the people they hold dear, motivating them to put everything on the line if it meant that there was even a slight chance everything would be alright.

There's good in people, even those that outwardly appear to not be worth the trouble. And it's that potential he latches on to, and why he tries so hard to lend a hand when he can.

This is actually where the trend of the importance of knowing people's names starts, because the companions often serve as his connection to the humans around them. They ground his perspective, reminding him to not focus so much on the grand scheme of things that he forgets to look at the smaller details. This is why in the episode Midnight it is so tragic that no one asked for the stewardes' name. For up until that point, he knew better than to not at the very least humanize her (by asking for something as basic as her name, her story, etc.) rather than see her as pawn in the midst of the problem. That is the principal that Rose instilled in him and yet when left alone, he finds himself forgetting to do so. Thus, why he takes the revelation to heart.

But I'm getting ahead of myself lol

It is when he is confronting the last of the daleks that he has to reconsider his beliefs of how the world had up till now functioned. He has been proven time and time again that the world is not always such a negative place, and that there is at times tranquility that could be found in the midst of the chaos. That the universe and it's inhabitants are capable of doing both good and evil.

So why is he so quick to want to kill the last of the daleks and cling to that cynicism he was beginning to reconsider? Here he is faced with a being who understands his pain, but in the form of his biggest enemy. It is not innocent, having been at one time capable of monstrous acts that caused mass suffering but...neither is he. There it stands defenseless and unarmed and yet he is the one threatening it with a weapon, just like Rose reasons. She is alive and unharmed, standing next to a dalek yet the active threat is not the dalek, it's him. He is tempted to kill it because his first instinct is to resort back to that hatred that gave him purpose for so long. The same poison the daleks used to eradicate the rest of his people. But is it truly incapable of being good, if not, then why is he any different? To give into the temptation would mean to validate that goodness could not be found everywhere. That if he followed the same mindset that once drove him to pull the trigger on everyone involved in the whole war, than he was doomed to become one of them. To repeat the endless cycle of violence and prove once and for all that he is a monster that cannot change.

Again the answer to the question is up to us to decide. But for him, there's only one clear answer.

No one else has to die. By choosing to not do anything he can live another day, without carrying the guilt of another being dying at his hands. Not because it has to be done, but because he has the option to refuse.

He can no longer assert that its existence as the final survivor of his race isn't important. That just because he hates it, doesn't mean it doesn't deserve a second chance like he got.

Really who is he to pass judgement, when there was a point in his life where he too was blinded by rage and the very narrow view he held of the world?

There is always a choice, and sometimes, the choice is to not take part in that decision.

And so that's what he does.

Rose takes on the burden for him, reaching out to the dalek in the same compassionate way he once did for him. Ordering the dalek to die not out of spite, but out of mercy because that is what the dalek wanted. A being born with the ultimate goal of surviving at all costs with hatred running through its blood, yet it's last moments are spent anguishing over all the death it caused. But unlike the Doctor, who strived to change as a result, he used up his second chance to end the pain. All it asked in return, was comfort or in other words...a hand to hold.

Or..so we think.

It's this ability to look past his biases that allows him to see the good in individuals like Mickey, Jack, and even Rose, when she inevitably screws up. He is able to grant them a second chance to prove themselves and keep them grounded, just like they did for him. His bonds to said people strengthen as a result and now he travels with a group of individuals he can trust with his life. People that can ease the burden and see the good in him.

Now the final episodes of his run is where the final test to his resolve to change is put into question. In a cruel twist of faith, history repeats itself.

Once again, he is given a choice: to let humanity die at the hand of the daleks, or end it all himself.

But alas he chooses not to give in. To not let himself become like the very thing he despises, because the alternative would mean witnessing the mass death of humanity at his hands. A group of beings he personally saw was capable of so much good, and was directly responsible for his change of heart. They reminded him that he was not above changing and that he could find meaning in simply continuing to find the good in others. He refuses, and so he seals his fate.

Yes he would die as a result, but at least he'll die knowing that he did all that he could. That he did not repeat the same cycle of violence that drove him to make the decision to eradicate all that he knew in an act of desperation.

He was free at last of the hatred that poisoned him for so long and it's due in part to the emotion that now stood in its place. Something he slowly cultivated throughout the span of his episodes: Love.

Love for humanity.

Love for Rose.

Love for himself. Because he finally did something he would not live to regret

" Before I go, i just want to tell you that you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And you know what? So was I!"

When he finally regenerates, it is done with the intention that his final act is not one of destruction, but love. This man, with the blood of so many on his hands, was able to forgive himself through the compassion extended to him when he was at his lowest. Rose a mere human, through sheer kindness, was able to motivate the doctor to keep going. To not hang up on the inevitabilities of life, and to find beauty in what was fleeting.

To have faith in the good of the people around him, even when it wasn't easy.

Most importantly, she reminded him that his journey was not one that had to be solitary. He could share the burden with others, and in turn, build genuine friendships that would help ease that loneliness he felt.

What makes Rose special to the doctor is not that she is inherently special. She is not someone of high status nor this faultless god that is capable of doing no wrong. No what makes her important to him is the fact that she was perceptive enough to realize that he needed help, and selflessly gave it at a time where he was at his lowest. She extended the best of humanity towards him during a time where he desperately needed a reminder that life was more than just pain. She never gave up on him, always assuring him that he was capable of doing good even when he himself didn't believe it.

This was not a bond forged on shallow appearances or attraction, no, it was a deep friendship in which both people involved grew to become better versions of themselves by the end. They just so happened to fall in love in the process.

Something I want to point out is that the reason why he has the courage to kiss Rose is because his love for her, he feels, is unrequited. He thinks this will be the last chance to show her how much she means to him in this body, and perhaps ever. He is insecure, you see that in the way he practically sneers at any man that looks at her yet he never makes a move himself. That is why he is deeply confused as to why it takes her so long to warm up to his 10th incarnation in the Christmas invasion. Going as far as to claim that she had given up on him. A behavior that to him, makes no sense as he was essentially tailored to her tastes. A pretty boy, just like the ones she showed interest in previously.

This is why he asks her upon regenerating what she thinks of his appearance and once again when he wakes up from his coma. He wants her to fawn over him but doesn't take into account that maybe, bursting into flames isn't exactly a normal human occurrence lol

But we see that that is not true. His looks were never something that bothered her. Because whenever she is made to make a choice between the doctor and someone else, it's always him. Even at the expense of what he would consider to be the safer options.

Rose loved him since his 9th incarnation. This is made evident in the manner in which she immediately asks him to change back once he regenerates into 10 (Doctor Who Born Again, Children In Need Special 2005).

"Can you change back?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yeah"

"Oh."

"Can you?"

"No"

(note: if you haven't seen this clip, I strongly recommend doing so as it adds so much context to the conflict explored in the Christmas special)

If she had solely loved him when he was 10, then she would have accepted him easily but she didn't. It took her the entirety of the Christmas invasion to understand that he was still the same man. This is why the episode focuses so much on 10 sort of dancing around her, trying to earn her approval by showing off how he's still the same man. Going as far as to pan on his face numerous times as he wistfully looks at her direction, all while he fights the sycorax as if to make sure that she is watching him be impressive. (it's something I realized upon rewatch, just how desperately he is trying to earn back her approval lol)

So with all of this in mind, nine essentially transforms into a new man. Figuratively and literally lol. A man that finds the joy in living again and meets each challenge with a curiosity akin to that of a child. He's fun, far less burdened (outwardly) by the death of his people and more open to meeting new people. He becomes what 9 physically believes to be the ideal image of a partner Rose would want, down to the wispy hair and handsome features. Not to mention younger, as if, physically representing the the burden being lifted from his body, thus de-aging him.

But with this new man that was born out of his love for humanity and Rose, there's a conflict that is more apparent than ever. Will he be able to overcome the implications that come with falling in love with a human?

This is where the conflict shifts, because with confronting this question he is left to actually take into consideration what it means to fall deeper in love with her. A scenario he previously only humored in fantasies because he was unaware that she returned them.

Had she simply loved him as a friend, it would have been easy to ignore it but no she had fallen for him too. So now he can no longer skirt around it. To fall for a human would mean to expose her to what a Time lord's life and perspective entails. How alien he truly is and how that especially affects the manner in which they communicate. This is explicitly said in the Christmas invasion, when her whole world shifts at the reminder that he is in fact not human.

"The thing is, I thought I knew him, Mum. I thought me and him were...and then he goes on and does this. I keep forgetting he is not human"

This is what series 2's main conflict is.

But it is far from one sided.

She in return, has to confront the inevitability of her death. Can she ask that of him, to put aside the pain and let her live out the rest of her days by his side? Once she outlives those she loves, would she become someone unlike herself?

Because now it's not a question of will they won't they, they know how they feel about one another. No, it's a matter of when.

This is why series two appears to have very little conflict between the two at first glance, but that's because the conflict is within themselves. Since ten was made with her in mind, they tend to operate very similarly and so they don't get in as many arguments as they did previously. Because again, ten exists from the changes made in nine. You cannot have one without the other,as they are the two sides of the same coin.

Another tid bit that must be mentioned is that 10's desire to be human can actually be traced back to 9's era. This is because the 9th doctor always made it a point to separate himself from Rose's family life. This is what causes him to have such a strained relationship with Jackie in the first place, because his refusal to take part in Rose's personal life directly interfered with Jackie's relationship to her daughter. Jackie does care for the Doctor. He is important to Rose and so she makes an effort to welcome him, even when he refuses.

But really from a few comments he makes off handedly in father's day, one can infer that the reason why he stays far away from their home life is more of a reflection of how he views himself. Like an outsider who cannot afford to get too close to the people around him.

After all he had this to say about the importance of living a life that is ordinary.

"i don't what this is all about, and I know we're not important -"

"who said you're not important? I've traveled to all sorts of places, done things you couldn't even imagine, but you two. Street corner, 2:00 in the morning, getting a taxi home. I've never had a life like that.."

You can't always trust the Doctor's words because he often puts on this unbothered front. But in this specific instance, he says this not as a means of diminishing it but rather being rather fond of the idea. To live the one adventure he could never have, sound familiar?

It's because of this that the 10th doctor makes an effort to be more involved in Rose's personal life. Extending his care towards her mother, and even spending the holidays with them. He even goes as far as to imply they were the closest thing to family when he tells Donna about it.

This long ass essay is all to essentially say that the idea of pitting ninerose, tenrose, and tentoorose against one another is rather pointless lol because they're all essentially the same ship but at different stages of their relationship. You cannot have the existence of one without the other because they all occupy the same man. All are equally valid according to the narrative and canon so please can we lay this useless competition to rest?

There's enough Rose to go around!

#10th doctor #doctor x rose #rtd era #tenrose #ninth doctor #nine x rose #rose x ten #ninerose #doctorrose #tentoo x rose #rambles #character analysis #retrospective #doctor who #someone should really take my phone away #cant stop thinking about them #this hyperfixation has me in a chokehold #timepetals #rose tyler

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goldenseresinretriever · 5 months

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You Catch More Bees With Honey: Prologue

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Reader

Part of the San Diego Dogfighters universe

Summary: Bradley Bradshaw, blindsided by a team he trusted like family has been traded to the San Diego Dogfighters. Across the country from the place he calls home, Bradley feels lost and betrayed. Not to mention the familiar faces and ghosts from his past that he now has to face every day at work. Bradley’s caught between wanting to show his former team the mistake they made in double-crossing him and wondering if it’s time to hang up his skates after one final season. You’re living your dream as the PR representative for the Dogfighters. When Coach Maverick made a bid to bring his godson to the team, you hadn’t batted an eye. Bradley was a good teammate, and a good player. Unfortunately, the Bradley that shows up in San Diego is nothing like your research suggested. He’s moody, irritable, aggressive, and angry, throwing a wrench in all your careful planning. What’s caused such a drastic change in him? And can you figure out how to help him before he makes a mistake you can’t fix?

Chapter CW: 18+ ONLY, None so far other than the patriarchy. No use of Y/N.

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: A very happy birthday to @roosterforme !!! As a birthday present for patiently waiting for SDD!Bradley, I present the prologue of YCMBWH!

Series Masterlist // Next Chapter

“Bradley Bradshaw.” You zone back into the conversation as Maverick offers his suggestion. You sneak a glance at the clock on the wall. Your bones are aching from sitting pin-straight for the last four hours. It’s been thirty minutes since you’ve been actively present in the conversation with the three grown men sitting at the conference table with you. At the head of the table is Tom “Iceman” Kazansky, the owner of the newly formed San Diego Dogfighters. At age 64, he’s aged gracefully since his glory days playing for the Boston Bruins and later, more famously, for the Anaheim Ducks, but not quite as gracefully as the man seated across from him. Pete “Maverick” Mitchell somehow still has the aura of pure charisma that he oozed through his lengthy, thirty-one-year hockey career. After an infamous stint with the Philadelphia Flyers in the eighties, he went on to play for the Anaheim Ducks for a whopping twenty-five years alongside both Iceman and the man sitting next to him. Beau “Cyclone” Simpson’s hockey career both on paper and in practice shows off his intense desire to be the next Iceman, but he seems to have fallen short. He followed Kazansky’s footsteps from Boston to Anaheim, taking a brief detour in Dallas on the way. And yet here he sits, the general manager for the Dogfighters.

The three of you are going through potential players who could be recruited, drafted, or traded for to create the roster for the new team. As the team’s PR representative, you don’t have much of a reason to be here but you’ve made yourself useful. One of your specialties is keeping meticulous records of the pasts and presents of your players and that means you run a killer background check. You’re here to evaluate the potential players based on their personal lives. Nobody wants to hire a PR nightmare, especially when you’re a new franchise.

This extracurricular project isn’t without its perks, however, just an hour ago you pitched the winger duo of rookie Mickey Garcia and seasoned veteran Reuben Fitch currently signed with the New Jersey Devils. Mickey and you have been friends since you met in college at the University of Wisconsin. Ever since Mickey got drafted to the Devils, you’ve been doing your best at maintaining your friendship long-distance, so when you got a job with the Dogfighters, Mickey was your first call, and after several lengthy conversations, he and Reuben agreed to you offering them as a potential trade prospect. You’d presented your meticulously rehearsed pitch to the three men at this table and they’d agreed that the duo would make a good addition to the Dogfighters.

After your pitch, you’d let yourself relax mentally. It wouldn’t do you any good to relax physically in front of your bosses. You’ve already clocked the looks Cyclone’s been giving you since you showed up on your first day in one of your signature pastel suits. Today you’re wearing one of your personal favorites, a baby pink number. You needed the extra burst of confidence that it always gives you. You know what it takes to be a woman in this business but that doesn’t mean you have to become a man. You flaunt your femininity as much as you pride yourself in your poised and polished appearance. Your suits are colorful enough to draw attention to yourself, but not indecent enough to make that attention bad. You stand out and you’re proud to do so. Men may command the room with their deep voices and raging testosterone tantrums, but you can command one just as well without even speaking a word. Curious attention is still attention and that’s what matters most.

“Bradley Bradshaw? From Philadelphia?” Cyclone sounds dubious as he muses over Maverick’s pick. Then again, he tends to sound dubious whenever it comes to Maverick generally. “He’s getting a little old, isn’t he?” His eyes flick to you, prompting you silently. Your perfectly manicured fingers fly across the keyboard as you speak up.

“Bradley Bradshaw, left defenseman for the Philadelphia Flyers. He was scouted by them straight out of college, and has been playing for them and their AHL affiliate for a total of sixteen years.”

“He’s never played for any other teams?” Cyclone says, raising an eyebrow. He’s right to be surprised, it’s unusual for any one player to stay with a franchise for so long, let alone their first one. Sure, both Ice and Maverick played for the Ducks for over a decade but they signed to other teams first. They established themselves before they established a home.

“His father, Nick Bradshaw played the same position for the Flyers from 1984 to 1986.” You rattle off as your eyes scan the various articles you have pulled up. “At the same time as Maverick,” your eyes flick up from your screen to where Maverick is shifting uncomfortably.

“You played with his old man?” It’s a statement phrased like a question. Cyclone’s piercing green eyes join yours on Maverick.

“I did. Bradley’s my godson, actually.” You can’t stop your eyebrows from raising at that. That particular tidbit wasn’t in any of the articles you’ve been skimming. You want to scoff at how easily Maverick offers up the information. He’s making his intentions clear from the get-go. This is personal for him. You’d kept your cards as close to your chest as you could when you’d pitched Mickey and Reuben. To make it personal was to tank the pitch in your eyes. You were here to be objective and offer objective suggestions for the team. You wait for Cyclone or Ice to chastise Maverick and when neither of them moves to do so, you feel your brow twitch with irritation. The privilege of being a man. Men are rational, and even an emotional decision is still more reasonable than the most rational statement a woman can make.

“Zam, what else do you have on Bradshaw?” Zam, your nickname, is short for Zamboni. You were given it during your first experience with managing public relations for your college’s hockey team. Your job, much like that of a Zamboni, is to smooth things over, both on and off the ice.

“He’s squeaky clean, sir.” Your eyes are back on the busy screen of your laptop, fingers flying across the keys. “He’s known as an enforcer on the ice, but doesn’t seem to be prone to any kind of violence or erratic behavior off the ice. He’s a team player, and his teammates have nothing but good things to say about him.” You rattle off his stats next, projecting them onto the screen at the head of the table. Other than his age being on the older side, as Cyclone had noted, he isn’t the worst pick in the world by a long shot. You know the importance of having senior members on a team, they form pillars for the rookies to build around and Bradley is the model pillar player. He’s well-rounded and the perfect balance between being well-known, and not an outright celebrity. Bradley Bradshaw is an ideal choice for the Dogfighters.

“Alright Maverick, we’ll give the Flyers a call about Bradshaw first thing tomorrow.” And with that, Bradley Bradshaw is halfway to the San Diego.

A/N: I wanted to get this out asap to drum up excitement for YCMBWH, but I’m going to be taking the rest of the week off from writing to focus on the SDD press conference in celebration of the end of “Snitches Get Stitches!” Happy birthday yet again to Emily!!!

#you catch more bees with honey // sdd #ycmbwh // sdd #san diego dogfighters #san diego dogfighters au #san diego dogfighters hockey au #tgm hockey au #top gun maverick hockey au #TGM #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw x you #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #Bradley rooster Bradshaw x you #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster x reader #rooster x you

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jebewonmorelike · 1 year

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Good Luck, Mickey!

wc: 1k warnings: a pretty flirtatious little joke made by ricky... do you need to be warned of that? maybe if you have a weak heart. otherwise very very light angst and fluff. pronouns: none used; n/a summary: planetmaster/idol!reader and their boyfriend ricky have to pretend they don't know each other while the cameras are on ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ this was a request! it's short and sweet but fun. i might want to expand more on this one eventually. spending tonight rewatching bp after work :,)

Positioning yourself in the wing of the stage strategically, you lean forward just a bit so you can take a look from behind the curtain at the crowd of unsuspecting trainees lined up after completing their second mission.

You spot a head of perfectly styled blonde hair sticking out from the group almost immediately due to the height of its owner. Smiling to yourself, you hop up and down a bit to pump yourself up. You can't wait to see the look on your boyfriend's face when you step out onto the stage.

The lights dim quickly, then flash dramatically back on as a producer gives you the go ahead. You nod respectfully and steady yourself as you begin to make your way out from behind the curtain and to the center of the stage. The boys gathered in front of you in neat formations begin to scramble excitedly; shouting and jumping with enthusiasm as you step towards the front of the stage.

Your eyes find Ricky, who is standing completely still as he stares up at you in shock-- not knowing how to react properly to your presence. Some of his teammates are poking him and laughing, teasing him about your unexpected appearance as a Planet Master.

You had met Ricky a while ago when he joined your company as a trainee. You would run into each other in the hallways at night, as you were always in a practice room trying to improve even after your debut. He could be uncharacteristically shy around you, since you were his senior (and he was secretly such a big fan). Needless to say, Ricky was incredibly surprised when you were the one who eventually asked him out.

"Hello Boys Planet trainees! I'm leader and main vocalist (Y/N) from Virtual Reality," you announce confidently. "I know you've only just finished your Second Mission, but time is limited when you're forming the next big K-Pop boy group!"

Most of the trainees begin another uproar, some complaining that they're exhausted and some shouting for you to hurry up and announce the next mission already. You sympathize with both sets of emotions.

You glance at Ricky, who is now smirking at you from the crowd-- eyebrows raised as he chews his cheek. Fighting the urge to grin back at him winningly, your eyes return to your script card in your hand.

"The Third Mission is..." You look back at the screen behind you and gesture towards it as a new pair of words appear. “Artist Battle!"

Yet another commotion ensues and you suddenly understand why the boys kept losing their voices in the first two missions. As you finish your script, announcing that teams will be formed and then re-formed after eliminations, you're instructed to meet and greet the trainees and give them your well wishes.

After a half hour of greeting all of the contestants and having to pretend like you'd never met any of them before in your life, an especially familiar contestant strolls up to you.

"Hello, how are you?" Ricky greets formally as a few of the trainees he is closest with giggle behind him. "It's so nice to finally meet you."

"Hi, how are you?" You return, extending your hand for him to shake as you bite your lip to keep yourself from laughing in front of the staff. "What did you say your name was?"

"Ricky," he replies, taking your hand in his and shaking it firmly. "And your name is?"

You squeeze his hand hard, raising your eyebrows in a stern warning. Too far, you mouth.

"Ow!" He whines before looking around to smile nervously at the closely observing staff. "I mean, WOW that joke did not land! Of course I know who you are. I love you."

You pinch his hand harder.

"--R WORK! I love your work," Ricky corrects after your warning, but the mischievous glint is still in his eyes. "I'm a big fan of your entire body of work."

Zhang Hao and Kuan Jui have to excuse themselves as they burst into laughter, running out into the hall to (most likely) tell everyone what Ricky just said with cameras rolling.

Ricky smiles at you smugly and you finally drop his hand. A producer frowns at you both confusedly. "Do you two... know each other or something?"

Ricky shakes his head. "Where would I have met the leader and main vocalist of Virtual Reality before?"

The producer nods, shrugging in agreement. "Huh. You just have good chemistry is all."

"He's not my type," you reply coolly, eyes narrowing as you glare at your boyfriend.

"Hey," Ricky pouts softly; a little frown forming on his lips.

You fight the urge to lift up on your toes and give your tall, handsome boyfriend a peck, opting instead to pat him on the shoulder and give him a boastful grin. "It was nice to meet you, Nicky!"

His eyebrows furrow now, the adorable pout growing deeper (and more powerful). "It's Ricky."

"Good luck, Mickey!" You call over your shoulder with a wave, following two staff members out the door.

Walking through the empty hall to the back parking lot after you've finished removing your wardrobe and makeup in your dressing room, you see your favorite trainee (okay-- your second favorite trainee. Red House Mingyu is actually your favorite but you can NOT tell Ricky that) waiting for you in the doorway.

"Hey Nicky," you greet with a laugh as Ricky looks up from his phone.

"Stoooooop," he whines, basically collapsing in your arms as you hug him. Into your shoulder, he mumbles, "I am your type."

You kiss his cheek, rubbing his back comfortingly. "You totally are my type.”

"I can't believe you're hosting the show I'm on," he says, pulling back from the hug to look at you. "You told me you were getting the cats bathed today."

You throw your head back in a laugh. "Cats don't get bathed, lovey."

He laughs awkwardly. “Oh."

"I thought that was such an obvious lie that you'd catch on!" You exclaim, grabbing his hand in yours and swinging them back and forth playfully.

Ricky looks around, checking if any staff are lingering in the hallway before swinging open the door and pulling you through.

"Where do you think you're going?" You ask with a giggle as Ricky pulls you towards your car.

"To get ramen with you," he replies with a smile, raising your hand in his above your head so he can twirl you around.

You spin around with a grin, bowing after the impromptu dance move before he continues to pull you along. You watch as his pretty, dangly earring jingles while he runs.

"Fine," you relent with a grin. "But you're gonna have to buy me a lot of ramen to make up for that body joke."

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gardenschedule · 2 days

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Perceptions of Paul as calculating & John's paranoia

“McCartney’s mistake, which he now admits, was to seem invulnerable. […] And yet, he says, the contrast between himself and Lennon, so assiduously cultivated by journalists, was a fabrication. “I wasn’t brilliant at school. I was trouble, just like John. I got caned practically every day, and the only exam I ever passed was Spanish. John and I weren’t black and white, although people took John, for all his aggression, to be the good guy, because he showed his warts. I’ve only just realized, after all this time, that people like to see warts. It makes them sympathetic. I’d always though that, in order to be liked, you had to be unwarty.””

Living with The Beatles’ legacy, the smears that Lennon left behind… and the battle to win my babies back, The Times Newspaper, Monday January 4, 1982.

Paul was the easiest to talk to. He had such energy and such keenness and, unlike John, enjoyed being liked, at least most of the time. I don't see this as a criticism; John himself could be very cruel about Paul's puppy dog eagerness to please. The irony was, and still is, that John's awfulness to people, his rudeness and cruelty, made people like him more, whereas Paul's genuine niceness made many people suspicious, accusing him of being calculating. Paul does look ahead, seeing what might happen, working out the effect of certain actions, but he often ends up tying himself in knots, not necessarily getting what he thought he wanted. I think there is some insecurity in Paul's nature, which makes him try so hard, work so hard. It also means he can be easily hurt by criticism, which was something that just washed over John.

Hunter Davies, Western Mail: The Beatles. (April 9th, 2004)

Even Paul’s immaculate manners could not thaw her. ‘Oh, yes, he was well-mannered–too well-mannered. He was what we call in Liverpool “talking posh” and I thought he was taking the mickey out of me. I thought “He’s a snake-charmer all right,” John’s little friend, Mr Charming. I wasn’t falling for it. After he’d gone, I said to John, “What are you doing with him? He’s younger than you… and he’s from Speke!”’ After that, when Paul appeared, she would always tell John sarcastically that his ‘little friend’ was here. ‘I used to tease John by saying “chalk and cheese”, meaning how different they were,’ she remembered, ‘and John would start hurling himself around the room like a wild dervish shouting “Chalkandcheese! Chalkandcheese!” with this stupid grin on his face.’

Philip Norman, Paul McCartney: The Life. (2016)

“He always suspected me. He accused me of scheming to buy over Northern Songs without telling him. I was thinking of something to invest in, and Peter Brown said what about Northern Songs, invest in yourself, so I bought a few shares, about 1,000 I think. John went mad, suspecting some plot. Then he bought some himself. He was always thinking I was cunning and devious. That’s my reputation, someone who’s charming, but a clever lad. “It happened the other day at Ringo’s wedding. I was saying to Cilia [Black] that I liked Bobby [her husband]. That’s all I said. Bobby’s a nice bloke. Ah, but what do you REALLY think Paul? You don’t mean that, do you, you’re getting at something? I was being absolutely straight. But she couldn’t believe it. No one ever does. They think I’m calculating all the time.

Paul and Hunter Davies, 1981

In the wake of his death you didn’t tour for most of the ‘80s. People suggested that you were scared to go on the road. Was that true? No. People speculate about anything. They always credit me with motives I haven’t even dreamed of. It’s interesting, the way they sort of perceive my life and analyse it for me. In that case, I never thought about touring much. People used to say, “Oh, it’s 10 years since you’ve toured.” I’d go, “Is it? Y’know, I’m not counting.” That’s all that was, really. I don’t know why. Maybe I didn’t fancy it.

The Q Interview, 2007

Astrid in Germany was always a bit suspicious of Paul at first, though his relationship with Stu was also bound up in this. 'It used to frighten me that someone could be so nice all the time. Which is silly. It's ridiculous to feel at home with nasty people, just because you feel that at least you know where you are with them. It's silly to be wary of nice people.'

The Beatles (Updated Edition) (Hunter Davies)

Paul is the easiest to get to know for an outsider, but in the end he is the hardest to get to know. There is a feeling that he is holding things back, that he is one jump ahead, aware of the impression he is giving. He is self-conscious, which the others are not. John doesn't care, either way, what people think. Ringo is too adult to think about such things, and George in many ways isn't conscious. He is above it all.

The Beatles (Updated Edition) (Hunter Davies)

Paul today is still the public Beatle, giving interviews at fairly regular intervals, being open and honest about himself and his past, his worries and his pleasures. Naturally, as ever, there are people who suspect his motives, putting him down for being too charming. Paul may be a bit of an actor, acting the part of Paul McCartney, the charming superstar, still loved by every mum, which can make him sound rather prissy at times, but I believe he does tell the truth about himself.

The Beatles (Updated Edition) (Hunter Davies)

“My problem is to me, I come over as this very together guy, always got his finger on top of everything: the man with no problems. School – a doddle, got all the exams. This is the sort of image of me. Actually, I had murder getting through exams, like I was saying about being on tour during my GCEs. I was like the kid who was getting the cane. Just like John was, but he [Phillip Norman] makes me the very shrewd, always-going-to-succeed guy, and John is the kind of cute, working-class hero. In actual fact though, John was just as shrewd and ambitious as I was. What does me in is he adds to this image I’ve got; I resent that, because I know I’m not that, and I know I’ve never been that.

Paul McCartney’s thoughts from 1983 on Phillip Norman’s ‘Shout!’

The funny thing is, when Apple [started], everything was laid out on the table, it’s like a Monopoly game. We saw who had what. I suddenly had more Northern Song shares than anybody, and it was like, oops, sorry. John was like, “You bastard, you’ve been buying behind my back.” John saw everything like a Harold Robbins movie, you know, which it was. He’s not incorrect. I couldn’t get over the fact that we were really involved in all this. I think to this day, he’ll not understand. I don’t think he would accept right now, my naïveté in it. I think he still suspects me of trying to take over Apple. He still suspects that when I offered the Eastmans as [managers] instead of Allen Klein, he naturally assumed that I would be taken care of better than the others, and that the Eastmans could never be moral enough to be equal in their judgment and do the Beatles’ thing rather than Paul’s thing. I think they still suspect to this day.

The point I was trying to illustrate is that it wasn’t so much John being a bastard as it was his being suspicious towards me, always being suspicious towards me. There was Northern Song shares. And I swear on any holy book you want, I know he won’t believe it, but I know for sure that I didn’t buy them with the view to— If I was really trying to do it, I could have bought an awful lot more. So it does hurt a little bit that there’s someone who still thinks, like, I’m out to get them, or that I always was. That’s one of the nice things about it— It’s a pity [I never said to John, “Fuck off, I’m not trying to do it”—and never was]. But he knows I was kind of— We were behind the scenes, and we did a few little [things] that we had to do, and our ambitions, and it was never a kind of terrifying skeletons in the closet. It was always just normal—but, uh, they …

All You Need Is Love – Peter Brown & Steven Gaines

SG: Were the other Beatles anti-Linda? PMcC: Uh, yeah. I should think so. Like we were anti-Yoko. But you know John and Yoko, you can see it now, the way to get their friendship is to do everything the way they require it. To do anything else is how to not get their friendship. This is still how it is with John and Yoko. I know that if I absolutely lie down on the ground and just do everything like they say and laugh at all their jokes and don’t expect my jokes to ever get laughed at, and don’t expect any of my opinions ever to carry any weight whatsoever, if I’m willing to do all that, then we can be friends. But if I have an opinion that differs from theirs, then I’m a sort of an enemy. And naturally, paint myself a villain with a big mustache on, because to the ends of the earth, that’s how they both see me. They’re very suspicious people [John and Yoko], and one of the things that hurt me out of the whole affair, was that we’d come all that way together, and out of either a fault in my character, or out of lack of understanding in their character, I’d still never managed to impress upon them that I wasn’t trying to screw them. I don’t think that I have to this day.

All You Need Is Love – Peter Brown & Steven Gaines

I was never out to screw him, never. He could be a maneuvering swine, which no one ever realized. Now since the death he’s became Martin Luther Lennon. But that really wasn’t him either. He wasn’t some sort of holy saint. He was still really a debunker. “For ten years together he took my songs apart. He was paranoiac about my songs. We have great screaming sessions about them.

Paul and Hunter Davies, 1981

SALEWICZ: Oh, he was presumably very paranoid. PAUL: I think so. I mean, he warned me off Yoko once. You know, “Look, this is my chick!” ’Cause he knew my reputation. I mean, we knew each other rather well. And um, I felt… I just said, “Yeah, no problem.” But I did sort of feel he ought to have known I wouldn’t, but. You know, he was going through “I’m just a jealous guy”. He was a paranoid guy. And he was into drugs. Heavy.

September, 1986 (MPL Communications, London)

Miles says, “I think Jane was always a bit irritated by John. Because he was so acerbic and difficult to get on with. And paranoid. He didn’t make life easy. I suppose it’s a sort of rapier wit, but it was usually just plain ordinary rudeness. There was nothing special about it.”

Paul McCartney profile for FAME Magazine (March 1990)

“They [Lennon & McCartney] saw each other again in 1977. The Lennons and McCartneys ate dinner together at Le Cirque, Paul’s favourite French restaurant in New York. John regretted going; it was a loathsome night. Paul and Linda blathered on and on about how perfect their lives were, how they had everything they’d ever wanted, and how they were as happy as they’d ever been. Something very paranoid suddenly occurred to John. Maybe Lorraine Boyle was spying on him for the McCartneys! He woke up the next morning still feeling disturbed; he consulted the Oracle. Swan assured him that Paul and Linda were frustrated and unsatisfied. Their marriage was in trouble, he said, predicting it would break up within the year. Lately Swan’s visions had been astonishingly accurate. Relieved, John began composing a song—a little ditty, really, that would never be released—in praise of the Oracle’s powers. But he still couldn’t understand why Paul and Linda had been together for as long as they had. There appeared to be a psychic connection between John and Paul. Every time McCartney was in town, John would hear Paul’s music in his head.”

Robert Rosen, Nowhere Man: The Final Days of John Lennon, (2000)

JOHN: […..] And he’s (Jagger) goin’ on about “he never calls. Do you think he ever calls? He never calls me. And he keeps changing his phone number all the time… And he’s hiding behind the kid.” I was hurt by it! You know… The fact that… A, I never call anybody. It’s not pride, it’s just that I never, ever have. REPORTER: Why? JOHN: I never call the other Beatles, I never call anybody. They always call me. REPORTER: Why? JOHN: Cos I’m self-involved! I’m paranoid, too. I don’t like phones… There’s nobody on this earth ever got a call from me that isn’t related, probably. Or a very old friend…

Sept 1980 – John

“Yoko was an extremist and was even more intense than John taking any idea or comment of his to the limit. If, for example, he complained about any of his fellow Beatles she would hint that that Beatle had always been an enemy implying that John should never deal with that person again. Her extreme positions fascinated John and help him take his mind off himself but when she became self-involved and paranoid herself -her paranoia usually dealt with her career, her fame and the fact that even though she had always been famous everyone conspired to keep her from getting even more famous- he had no place to turn. His insecurity about his solo career, his childhood, his relationships with the other Beatles, the way the public perceived Yoko overwhelmed him and he became more and more involved with drugs.”

May Pang, Loving John (1984)

John was lucky. He got all his hurt out. I’m a different sort of a personality. There’s still a lot inside me that’s trying to work it out. And that’s why it’s good to see that wedding-funeral bit, because I started to think, ‘Wait a minute, this is someone who’s going over the top. This is paranoia manifesting itself.’ And so my feeling is just like it was at the time, which is like, He’s my buddy, I don’t really want to do anything to hurt him, or his memory, or anything. I don’t want to hurt Yoko. But, at the same time, it doesn’t mean that I understand what went down.

Paul McCartney: An Innocent Man? (October, 1986)

Some three year later, during the making of Abbey Road, Lennon installed a twin bed in the studio so that Yoko, recuperating from a car crash, could survey proceedings and pass comment though a mike he had suspended over her. The other Beatles positioned themselves around the room as best they could. Yoko would later tell Paul that if, for any reason, he’d seemed to be standing too close to her, all hell would break loose when John got her home. Lennon, she said, was ‘very paranoid’ like that.

McCartney by Chris Sandford

But we were actually quite supportive. Not supportive enough, you know; it would have been nice to have been really supportive because then we could look back and say, “Weren’t we really terrific?” But looking back on it, I think we were okay. We were never really that mean to them. But I think a lot of the time John suspected meanness where it wasn’t really there.

Paul McCartney, interview w/ Chris Salewicz for Musician: Tug of war – Paul McCartney wants to lay his demons to rest. (October, 1986)

#the beatles #paul mccartney #john lennon #mclennon #i wonder how much of their issues were due to john suspecting paul of things that just weren't true #then again maybe paul is secretly an evil mastermind #can't put it past him

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ectomoog · 4 months

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How to Get Your Friends into Doctor Who (2005) - A Guide

Ok I really like Doctor Who, and of course I like introducing people to it, but oh my god do you forget how randomly terrible and/or cringy and/or uncomfortably Moffat-esque some of the episodes are, *especially* when you're watching it with someone who has no idea what to expect.

SO I made a list of ten episodes that I think would be the best loose sequence of episodes for a causal introduction to the show...

But first, some requirements:

It has to be a one-off (NO TWO-PARTERS), low commitment, etc

It can't require watching previous OR following episodes to be enjoyable

It needs to actually be good

It needs to represent Doctor Who well

In a social setting where you're showing a group of people an episode, most of these would be fine. Watching consistently with one person however, loosely follow this order, and if your person decides at any point that they want to commit to actually watching the show, skip straight back to The End of The World and watch Series 1. Ok list time...

1. Rose (S1, E01)

I think Rose is the perfect episode of Doctor Who to start on. It's campy, it's fun and weird and it sets up almost everything you need to know for the Revival Era. You get the companion, the Doctor, regular Doctor Who tropes and themes, etc. Plus, if they can't get past the Mickey bin scene, this show probably isn't for them anyway.

2. Dalek (S1, E06)

Skipping a few episodes into Series 1, Dalek is a great way to get a feel for the format of the show, and also a great and intentional introduction to the Daleks. The Doctor and the companion turn up in a mysterious place and have to battle an alien force and really unlikeable one-off side characters, the works basically. It's a fun monster-movie of an episode.

3. Vincent and The Doctor (S5,E10)

Jumping a whole five series forward, Vincent and The Doctor is a notoriously heart-wrenching historical that I think is a classic (if a little indulgent) example of Doctor-meets-famous-historical-figure. It's nice to jump to a different Doctor and a different era of the show, to get a feel for its' diversity. Although there's a few moments relevant to the greater series plot, it's contained, very pretty, very sweet, and easy to understand.

4. Midnight (S4, E10)

Midnight just feels like an essential episode to be honest. A fantastic one-off sci-fi horror/thriller, with one of David Tennant's best performances, a great introduction to the 10th Doctor. It's a shame you don't get more Donna, but I think this one would be my go-to if someone asked for the best episode to watch stand-alone, just based on how genuinely great it is.

5. Heaven Sent (S9, E11)

Jumping to Series 9 with another critically-acclaimed episode, but also one that I think is an amazing introduction to the 12th Doctor. Heaven Sent is a little unconventional, and I'm not 100% sure it should be here, but it does give Capaldi a whole episode to just act his ass off, and he completely delivers. It's artsy, mysterious and dramatic, very much the high concept sci-fi style of Moffat's later scripts, so I think an appropriate watch.

6. The Voyage of The Damned (2007 Special)

If you're not in a festive mood, try The Lodger or Demons of the Punjab instead

The Christmas episodes are too iconic not to show, and as far as Christmassy vibes, celebrity cameos and whimsical concepts go, this one is a fun one. This is David Tennant in his prime, with Kylie Minogue, a massive budget and a romp of a script.

6. Blink (S3, E10)

I mean, duh, but genuinely I think Blink is just *too good* not to include. A tense, creepy, tightly-written piece of horror TV with twists and turns and drama, it's considered the best episode of Doctor Who for a reason, and along with Midnight is an amazing stand-alone episode. It's not super conventional, but all the timey-wimey stuff is very Doctor Who.

6. The Mummy on The Orient Express (S8, E08)

If you're a Tennant stan you could swap this out for The Planet of the Dead

This one is just a fun one really. The Mummy on The Orient Express is stylish and fun, with a cool concept and a little peek into a more complex Doctor-companion relationship. With a short explanation you can get the context pretty easily, and it's a good example of your typical episode anyway.

HOWEVER if you have time, there's a bunch of two-parters you should watch instead, like The Family of Blood, The Empty Child, Silence in the Library, even Extremis.

9. The Haunting of Villa Diodati (S12, E10)

Finally some 13th Doctor rep! This one has some of the strongest writing in the Chibnall era, and is a fun horror mystery that serves as a fun introduction to Jodie Whittaker as the 13th Doctor. It has a little bit of series-wide arc, but that's okay.

10. The Church on Ruby Road (2023 Special 4)

If your person liked all those episodes but still doesn't want to watch 13 seasons of TV, just abandon ship and watch the 2023 Christmas special in preparation for Series 14 (or Season 1) in Spring 2024. The Church on Ruby Road is the beginning of the latest soft reboot of the show and has been explicitly created as a jumping on point for new fans. Ncuti Gatwa and Millie Gibson absolutely shine in this special, it's fun and silly and in my opinion bodes very well for the next season of Doctor Who...

"in 900 years of time and space, I've never met anyone who wasn't important" - Bannakaffalatta

I hope that was a success! After all those episodes hopefully you either had a good time with whoever you were watching it with, or you've already moved onto Series 1! I'll be trying this out the best I can with my girlfriend this year, so look out, because I may be back with adjustments later...

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golden28s · 4 months

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so i was thinking about their "reunion" in s7 and i feel like we always talk about the sad part of it, the fact that mickey probably had some fears and wondered if ian actually wanted to see him etc but i don't think we talk enough about how proud mickey must had felt when ian told him more about his life at that time. i mean, in s6 ian doesn't say anything and either way his situation was mostly the same so you could say that the last time he saw ian, he was lost and hopeless and mad at himself and mad at the world. he left a version of ian that didn't have dreams, aspirations and like i said, was lost and for ian feeling lost and having no direction was a devastating thing because knowing exactly what he wanted and working for it used to be a very vital part of his identity.

but then he sees him again in s7 and ian isn't lost anymore. he found a new dream, new aspirations. he had a job, he felt like himself again, he was a whole again. i just know that mickey felt proud and not only mentioned the uniform because he looked good in it but because he was curious and wanted to know and ian looked, well, found. he found himself again, he was on his feet again. mickey was probably really proud of him and i know he had faith in ian, he knew ian wasn't "fucked for life" even if he felt like that, ian had a whole world of options and opportunities.

and i personally think this is one of the reasons why he didn't get mad or that mad when ian told him he couldn't cross that border with him, i think mickey understood he couldn't leave that behind. he understood ian couldn't live in chaos again, he needed a path, a routine, work towards something, have aspirations and goals and normalcy. so he understood and didn't insist, didn't push or force him. i think he understood so many of ian's decisions when it came to leaving more than we think even if it hurt.

#just a thought your honor #and i guess #gallavich headcanon #gallavich #shameless #mickey milkovich #ian gallagher

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brianmayfanatic39 · 2 months

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Maybe its cause I'm still sleepy and very hungry, but sometimes I feel like most fanfic authors dont get Nine. Yeah, he can be sarcastic and sassy and he sure has a temper, but above all things, his main motivation for most things isnt anger. Its guilt. I can think of a dozen examples off the top of my head.

("I couldn't save your world, I couldn't save any of them", the thing with the Gelth, sending Rose away during Parting of the Ways, saving Rose at the risk of letting the last Dalek in existense loose on the US, "You survived too" "Not by choice")

He starts off Series One as someone who wants to right his wrongs at all costs, even at the expense of his own life. We literally see that during Rose and Nine's first meeting. He starts off Series One as somebody who wants to remain distant. RTD once said that why he wears his leather jacket, as if to say to the world, "Don't touch me".

And by the end of his run, he has filled his hearts with love. He invites Mickey to come along, he flirts with Jack, he rediscovers his love for humans, he has hope again.

(Everybody lives, Rose. Just this once, everybody lives)

His final moments are acts of love. He takes the energy of the time vortex for Rose, even though that means he won't be with her ever again. He tries his best to reassure her as he begins regenerating. By the end of Series One, Nine dies, not with fear or regrets, but at peace, with a smile on his face. Kind of reminds me of Twelve's final words.

"Doctor, I let you go."

As tragic as it was for Chris Eccleston to leave the role so soon, he left behind a damn near perfect character arc with the Ninth Doctor, from "Run" to "And you know what? So was I"

And a good chunck of the fics I've seen reduce him to "The Angry Doctor". Which is funny because Ten, to me, is the textbook definition of Barely Restrained Anger. But that neither here nor there.

#I am choosing to ignore that both Nine and Ten left Jack behind #they would not fucking say that #that dont count #doctor who #the doctor #ninth doctor #christopher eccleston

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crystallizsch · 2 months

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hello i am once again thinking about grim, and by extension the heartslabyul duo because if there’s anything else that lives in my head rent-free it’s how the main four are as close as friends as they are throughout the entire game so far.

(help this ramble became longer than i intended)

-> i know it's a pattern that the previous dorms help out in the next book which means once book 7 ends, we’re assuming book 8 would be about ramshackle(?). which means it’s diasomnia’s turn to have a big role in the following dorm. -> but it got me thinking. throughout the books, heartslabyul (specifically adeuce) is always present somehow. no matter how much screen time they actually have and how relevant they are to the conflict at that time. (actually i think something similar could be said with diasomnia but i want to focus mainly on adeuce) -> throughout the books, we're just set up with how good of friends the four are. the prologue, books 1 and 2 start to develop the four's chemistry together, and by book 3 we get one of the first signs that yuu cares about these three to the point they're willing to risk it because their dumbasses decided to sign a deal with azul. -> in book 4, while adeuce didn't have much involvement, i believe twst JUST hammers home that all four of them are friends friends. we are shown how ace and deuce went through all the trouble of transportation DURING THE HOLIDAYS because they thought yuu and grim were in trouble. like they could've easily just went "hey it must have been nothing" but they were worried enough to go check on them, not even thinking that someone else could've had handled it already.

-> since the pattern was that the previous dorm helps the next dorm, why does it seem like in book 5 it seems that heartslabyul, or at least, adeuce has as much of a big role as scarabia? the scarabia duo was there to notice the signs with vil but it was deuce who dealt the last blow to him. (honestly i don't remember much but i don't know how much help scarabia even helped pomefiore other than being in vdc hhh) -> so then it made me think, huh. it's like twst is setting up that these two will be more important than we think and will definitely not be going away soon. -> and then THE END OF BOOK 6. ouughh the end of book 6. their reunion just solidified for me how much they all care about each other. adeuce were not prompted by a direct "we're in trouble, help us" text this time. they just found out yuu and grim were somewhere in danger and it agonized them that they could do nothing about it but wait and hope they're safe. -> book 7 finally we're back to finding out ways to help yuu get home. and since they're all admittedly close friends (dare i say found family) at this point without explicitly stating it, i get the vibes of "we'll help you get home because we care about you but we're not going to think about the depressing possibility we might never see each other ever again".

-> so very abrupt transition;;; this led me to thinking about the overall “alice in wonderland” theme throughout twst. -> is that why adeuce has been with us this entire time? to remind us of that theme? we are in twisted wonderland after all. (I'm not really sure about the thought of yuu being alice but it's an interesting one to consider too) -> to tie in more with the alice in wonderland theme, i'm briefly going to go back to diasomnia. in book 7, there's like a theme of dreams. in fact, throughout the game it was all about dreams and visions and stuff. and in book 7 we're just diving into it. -> and in the story of alice in wonderland, there seems to be the implication that everything that happened in wonderland was just based on a crazy dream that alice had. like we don't know if anything was ever real. (i'm not really a fan of the "it's all a dream" twist but the connections got the gears in my brain turning) (also mickey must be relevant too but i have no thoughts about the implications of his existence at the moment 💀) -> i know we're not done with diasomnia's book but it seems to be set up as a catalyst for something bigger along the line (thinking about the possibility that there is even something bigger than a malleus overblot is very wild to say the least)

-> SO ANOTHER abrupt transition but still related, i thought about the parallel between the "overblot grim" in the beginning of the game and the "jabberwock(y)" in alice in wonderland. they're both chimera-like creatures that are like the final bosses or something. -> and what if a way for yuu to "go home" is to "slay" the jabberwocky (or in this case the overblot grim) just like in the story of alice in wonderland / through the looking glass. -> there's theories i believe that ace is set up to be some kind of "trump card" based on his name and the fact his unique magic isn't revealed yet. but also i want to add deuce in there too remembering how he held a big role in stopping vil in book 4 like some kind of foreshadowing. -> maybe the main role diasomnia will have is only about all these dream shenanigans. and i'd like to think instead that at the end of the day, this conflict with an overblotted grim is ultimately between our main four. some representations based off alice in wonderland. -> going full circle, is this why we have been shown so much of the friendship between all four of them? to establish this possible eventual conflict? and to make it harder for us to choose about "going home"? do we even get the choice?

do we "slay" the jabberwocky or will we decide to stay in this seemingly dreamlike fantasy wonderland instead?

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stayarmytinyzenmoa-l · 1 year

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Hey, Mickey!

University AU TW: Language, Alcohol Consumption, P w/out P, Hook-Up Culture, Y/N's a bit promiscuous but so are her friends lmfao Smut Warnings: Sloppy Make Outs, Penetrative Sex, Degradation, Name Calling, Oral (Giving and Receiving), Fingering, Overstimulation, San's a meanie (translated: soft dom ish), Unprotected Sex (contraceptives are sexy guys), Creampie, Cockwarming(ish), Manhandling, Multiple Orgasms Genre: Romance, Smut, Exes-to-FWB-to-Lovers, Minors DNI Pairing: Choi San x Reader YN Pronouns: Female (She/Her) Word Count: 4.3K

[Other Groups Masterlist] [Ao3 Link] | [Wattpad Link]

Notes: I'm in my choi san era and the hey mickey you so fine audio has been stuck in my head all day so oop here we go Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.

Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!

"Oh, yeah, he's my ex-boyfriend," you shrugged.

"He's your ex?!" Your friend shouted and you flinched back. She whips her head back and turns your head gently for you to follow her gaze.

"Way to be subtle..."

"Look at him! He's sculpted like a god!" She whispers harshly. San, meanwhile, shakes his hair with his hand while talking to two of your other friends. Sure, you could see why your friend found him attractive, all the surface-level bull shit at the very least. Good build, strong figure, killer jawline, etc. etc. Hell, sometimes you swear he'd subtly flex on purpose just to get his admirers swooning. He's so fucking pretentious for that. But his looks are where it ends.

"You're overreacting," you rolled your eyes and pulled away from her. Cocky and good for nothing, whenever you'd spend any amount of time with San you'd always get worked up in some shape or form. Once your friend saw how much of a shitty person he could be she'd definitely run the other way. Choi San was basically a walking red flag.

"(Y/N), how the fuck did you fumble the bag with him?! He's so damn fine," she chews on the tip of her thumb.

"Okay, hold on," you defended yourself, "first of all, I broke up with him, and second of all, it was a mutual agreement to break up," you explained. Your friend groaned and slumped against her chair.

"So he's off limits then?" She asks sadly.

"Off limits? Far from, by all means take him," you waved your hand absently. "San and I agreed to go back to being friends, we worked better that way anyway," you shook your head. Just friends, you weren't really lying, you were just cutting around the truth.

"How long did you date?"

"Two years."

"Fuck... How long has it been since you broke up?" She asks.

"Three years."

"Oh, shit, okay then!" She tucks her hair behind her ear. "How do I look?"

"Stunning, go get him, tiger," you said with a chided tone. Yeosang breaks his conversation with San as soon as he spots you. Your friend brushes past him, bumping into his shoulder on her way over but sparing no other interaction. Yeosang side-eyed her until he finally reached you.

"What's up with her?"

"He got her," you laughed without sparing a glance.

"He has that effect," Yeosang takes the now spare chair. "You're still on for tonight, though, right?" You looked up from your computer.

"Of course, I am, when have I ever said no to a party?" You asked. Yeosang throws his hands up.

"Just asking! Last time we went out you bailed!"

"I didn't bail I ended up hooking up with someone so I got busy!" You explained. Someone who just happened to be talking up your friend at the moment.

"Sure, (Y/N)! Ditch your childhood friends so you could go fuck around, we don't mind!" Wooyoung hops into the conversation. Technically you didn't ditch your childhood friends, considering he is one of them. "As long as you bring us, of course," he grins.

"Screw you!" You pushed his head away playfully. "I'm serious, I have to finish this before we go out tonight." You waved your hand to silence Wooyoung and continued typing away.

"You're such a killjoy, (Y/N)," Wooyoung sits on the other chair now. "What are you wearing?" He asks. You slid your phone to him to show him the picture and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"Whoops, wrong one," you slid your finger across the screen to show the actual outfit.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Wooyoung swiped to the previous picture and leaned toward Yeosang, who shrugged and continued drinking his iced coffee.

"Saw that one already."

"Huh?!" Wooyoung's jaw dropped.

"Bruh, I told you to choose the other one!" Yeosang argues.

"I didn't like the other one!" You fought back. Wooyoung swipes to the previous picture.

"No, yeah, (Y/N)'s right, she looks better in the black one," Wooyoung agrees.

"The blue looks better," Yeosang swipes to the blue lingerie picture and Wooyoung responds with a shocked expression.

"He just doesn't get it," Wooyoung shook his head.

"(Y/N), thanks for watching my things," your friend bounds back and grabs her backpack.

"How'd it go?" You ask.

"He's taking me with him to the party tonight!" She couldn't hide her excitement. "Oh, who are your other friends here?" She looks between the two boys that joined you.

"Close friends."

"We're friends with San too," Wooyoung speaks up right on time for San to arrive.

"Oh... oh, (Y/N), wait, are you sure you're okay with me talking to San?" She asks with apologetic eyes.

"Yeah, go for it, I'm talking to someone new anyway," you shrugged. Now that caught San's attention. You tried not to look at him, memories of just last week resurfacing now.

"Right! The guy from orgo, right?" Your friend sneaks in a sly look with an even slyer grin. "Tell me how your date goes tomorrow!" She gives you a side hug before smiling at San. Then, she was gone.

"Guy from orgo?" Yeosang asks. You took a deep breath, leave it to her to spill a secret.

"He's nice, and his name is Mark, so don't be mean!" you defended him.

"Do we know him?" Wooyoung butts in. "Come on, we know basically everything about each other, tell us about this guy," he insists.

"Nothing big, okay? He's just a sweet guy who asked me out on a date, alright?" You shut your laptop, knowing full well that your essay won't be done any time soon.

"You guys fuck yet?" Yeosang asks.

"Holy shit, straight to the point," you grimaced at him.

"Hup, that expression says everything. And you said yes to going out on another date?" Yeosang presses. "Wait, wait, is this why you asked me what color of lin-"

"Shut up, Yeo, we're in public!" You shushed him quickly, just in time to catch San's glance. "But... yeah, alright? He's just sweet, okay? I want it to work out," you cleared your throat. "He got me flowers the other day..." your face began to heat up.

"Holy shit," Yeosang shakes his head. "The bar is set so low."

"The bar is you, my guy," Wooyoung laughs at San. "Imagine how shitty of a boyfriend you have to be for your ex to be blown away when she gets flowers."

"What kind of flowers?" Yeosang asks.

"Lilacs! Look how cute they are," you showed him a picture.

"Aww, good for you, (Y/N), you deserve someone sweet like that," he nudges you softly.

"Yeah, (Y/N), you're always into assholes, so maybe this will shake things up a little," Wooyoung jokes.

"Hey," San finally speaks up.

"You are an asshole!" You all respond.

"Yeah, an asshole who's DDing you two later so watch your mouth," San glares at Wooyoung and Yeosang, who only roll their eyes.

"We're not even going to get that drunk!"

"I am so drunk!" Wooyoung cries into your arms while Yeosang threw up in a trashcan next to you.

"Dear god, okay, it's okay, Wooyoung," you comforted him.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Wooyoung grimaces.

"Ew, no, no, share the trashcan with Yeo," you shoved him off of you and tumbled out of the bathroom. You slammed the door shut and the girl who was next line looked at you with pleading eyes. "You don't want to go in there," you waved your hand and she ran off to find another bathroom. You pulled your phone out and typed out a quick response to Mark.

"Sending your friend after me? That's a dirty trick, (Y/N)," San leaned against the wall, effectively blocking your way out of the hall. You shoved your phone in your bra and took a deep breath.

"Hey, I didn't send her, she went herself," you shrugged.

"Is that right?" He leans toward you, hand playing with your dress strap. "She's waiting for me in this room here, you know," he nudges his head toward the door next to him. Your eyes slid over to it, the stark image of your poor friend waiting for her hook-up to return crossing your mind. San leans down to your ear, pulling you closer with the aforementioned dress strap. "Why don't we go into the room next to it?" Your eyes met his in an instant. You swore you wouldn't do this again.

"I hate you," you pushed forward and pressed your lips to his. Instantly, he fell into rhythm, like he had many times before, and like he would in the future. You pushed him against the door, the weak thing rattling against its frame, and your friend's surprised yelp resounding despite the deafening music. San smirked against your lips, one hand tugging your dress down your shoulders while the other held the side of your face. Quickly, the kiss got messier, it was gross, almost. Teeth grazing each other and tongues swirling together, it was disgusting, but fuck were you both into it. San pulled you into the next room over and kicked the door shut. He pushed you down onto the bed and climbed on top of you, his hands were gripping the bottom of his shirt before you pulled him down to kiss him again. You tugged at his belt buckle while his lips moved down from your lips to your neck, and you were just barely pulling it off by the time he started to bite down on your nape, and your hands squeezed at the leather while a strained moan escaped you. San pauses before pressing his lips against the shell of your ear.

"Oh, come on, you can do better than that." His knee pushes up between your legs and they open near habitually. You pulled his shirt off right as he pushed your skirt up, his belt was clattering against the floor right next to your panties, and now your dress was pooled under his jeans near the corner of the bed. San's lips attached to your chest, inching closer to your nipples as his hand pushed against your thigh.

Then, it hit you. You had a date tomorrow. You had a date with a wonderful guy, someone who treated you with so much care that you didn't even know was possible, and here you were, about to get dicked down by your ex-boyfriend just like you had been for months now. You grabbed onto his wrist and he stopped. He pushed himself up so that he hovered above you now.

"We can't do this, we said we'd stop," you were out of breath. San didn't say a single word, no, it was like he was waiting for you to really think harder about this. You pushed yourself up on your elbows, ready to leave, but San kept you caged between him. "I... I'm seeing someone right now," you admitted this, but you couldn't meet his eyes.

"Talking or dating?" He asks. You still couldn't look at him.

"Talking," you muttered. With two fingers he pushed against your cheek to face him.

"Are we going to fuck or not?" He asked. "If you want to stop right now, then I'll stop and go next door. If not, tell me now." He said in a low voice. Hell... you can't say no to him when you're looking at him like this. Plus... you really didn't want your friend to have sex with him.

"What's one more fuck?" You shook your head. It was the same thing you said last time, the time before that, and the time before that. What's one more fuck? That stupid smirk that San was so good at appeared on his face again while he moved down.

"What's one more fuck?" He mocks you. "You gonna say that again tomorrow when you come running back to me after that date of yours?" His tongue traces up the inside of your thighs and your arms start to give in under you. "Are you going to say that to me again after he fucks you too? When you find out that he can't take care of you the way I do?" His tongue swipes up your pussy now and your thighs tense up. San's hands held them down now, the skin beneath them no doubt bruising. Then, when you felt the feather-light kiss against your clit, you knew what you'd agreed to. San ate you out like everything was on the line, his tongue practically scooped at your walls like he was trying to get every last drop into him. Your hips bucked up, but he kept you pressed down, and your hand that had found its way into his hair seemed to work on its own.

"Ah... fuck, fuck, I'm gonna cum," you shook your head against the mattress and you bundled his hair into your hands. "San, fuck, just like that," your moans grew louder with every circular motion he made. He sucked on your clit and, like that, you were undone. Your thighs pressed against his hands while your pussy clenched around his tongue, but not once did he let up, no, instead he picked up the pace. You rode through your first orgasm with him already building up your second one, but before you could get there, he rose up, wiping his mouth with the palm of his hand.

His hand presses against your pussy now, middle finger tracing the lips so gently. "Baby, I hope you weren't planning on enjoying the party, cuz you're in for a night," he chuckles. He kisses you again, with the slight bitter aftertaste of you on his tongue. He presses two fingers into you and your breath hitches again, then it's stolen by him, who deepened the kiss. You moaned against him, and you squirmed each time he pressed against your g-spot.

"San, ah," your voice shook and you pressed your head against the mattress again, trying your best to control yourself. He pressed his thumb against your clit and a high-pitched sound bubbled up your throat. He rolled it in small circles and your breathing picked up. His fingers plunged into you and your hands groped toward his cock. You gripped onto the waistband of his boxers, making small tugging motions that grew in intensity with each thrust. You finally pulled them down and he kicked it off. You wrapped your hand around the base of his cock and pumped it up and down. "Ah, wait, I'm cumming," your handjob slowed to a halt right as you felt your pussy clamping around him.

"Fuck, (Y/N)," his hand slows and he pulls his hand out. "Open." Your tongue lolled out of your mouth and San shoved his fingers inside your cheek, lipstick smearing under his thumb. His cock lined up at your pussy and he pushed into you.

"Oh fuck," you moaned. San gripped onto your chin now, his other hand holding onto the bedframe behind you while he worked his cock into you. Every time he'd pull out and push back in his cock went deeper into you, until finally, his hips hit yours.

"Made just for me, huh?" He grins. He nods your head up and down for you and you breathed out a shaky moan as he readjusted. "What's that new guy of yours gonna say when he finds out you're just a cock hungry slut?" He thrusts into you. "You're going to send him running." You tried to shake your head but he held you still while he pumped his cock into you. You held onto his wrist and tried to pull his hand off, but when you figured he wasn't budging, you grabbed onto the sheets under you instead.

"I... I'm going to cum," you choked out.

"Hold it."

"Ah... I can't," your hips rose to meet his. "I can't, please let me cum."

"I swear to god, if you cum, I'm going to send a picture of how fucked up you are to him." Every muscle in your body tensed. He released your face and grabbed your phone from wherever it had landed. He only paused for a second, just long enough for him to pull up the text conversation you had with your poor date. He raises the phone up and takes a picture, cock still inside of you and makeup messed up and all. He turned your phone around to show you, his thumb dangerously close to the send button.

"Don't, oh fuck, don't send that to him, please," you begged him. San placed the phone on the nightstand and started to pick up the pace. "San, don't send that to him."

"Don't cum then, easy as that," San leaned over you attaching his lips to your neck. "You can do it," he encouraged you, but his hand started to play with your clit and you could feel your head spinning.

"Fuck..." your words trailed off. You couldn't stop moaning now, and San grunting into your ear didn't help. You felt him bite down on your neck, leaving a trail of hickeys down to your collarbone. He lifts you off of the bed and moves under you. He grabs your hips and held you steady while he pistoned up into you. "San!" You grabbed onto the headboard.

"Say my name again," his thrusts started to get faster. "Say it!"

"San! Just like that, fuck, please let me cum," your head fell on his shoulder and your hands wrapped around his neck. You pressed sloppy kisses under his ear and San groaned. Then, to your horror and to his amusement, your phone started vibrating on the table. San stopped and you cried.

"Oho, who's that?" San's head turned and you grabbed his wrist before he could even think of reaching for your phone.

"Don't," you looked into his eyes and San's smile only grew.

"Oh, I won't answer it, that's fucked," he says. "You will, though."

"No..." you shook your head and he grabbed your phone, holding it up for you.

"Answer it, (Y/N). You don't want to break the poor guy's heart, do you?" He teases you. "Don't mind me, I'll just be here," he adjusts himself to be more comfortable. "We can continue after," he says. But you knew him, you knew that look in his eyes. You made a move to pull out of him, but he held your hips down. He slid his thumb across the phone, the call connecting.

"Hey, (Y/N)," you heard Mark's voice. "I hope you don't mind that I called out of the blue, like this." You held your breath and San looked at the phone. "(Y/N)?"

"Hi, hey, Mark," your voice was weak.

"Whoa, I call at a bad time?" San shook his head. "What are you up to?"

"I'm just," your voice hitched up when San started to lightly move his hips, "I'm at the gym, is all."

"Oh! No wonder, you sound tired!"

"Just a little," you answered. "Why did you call?" You tried to move off of San again, but he pulled you down. He leaned forward and kissed under your jaw while he placed the phone down next to you.

"No big reason, I just wanted to hear your voice, is all." San licked up your jawline and captured your lips with his before you could respond. "Sorry, was that weird?" You moaned quietly.

"No, no, I don't mind," you answered quickly. San began to thrust into you again. "Look, Mark, I'll... I'll talk to you later, you kind of caught me at a bad time," you glanced down at where your bodies connected and you bit down on your lip.

"Yeah! It's no biggie, I'll see you tomorrow! Pick you up at eight?" San hung up the call and flipped you down onto the bed, your breasts pressed up against the comforter and his hand on your head.

"You're joking, right?" His tone takes on a new sardonic one. "Mark, that nerd?" He laughs and pulls out of you, cock landing between your ass cheeks. "Come on, (Y/N), talk about a fucking downgrade, you two even fuck yet?"

"Yes," you answered.

"Wait, wait, let me rephrase that," you felt his cock prodding at your entrance. He places your phone in front of you, the camera turned on. You almost wanted to look away from it, but he stopped you from doing so. You noticed the red square at the bottom of it. "Has he even made you cum yet?" He asks you. You shook your head and San thrust into you again. You moaned and hid your face away while he fucked you into the mattress. "You really think he can get you as dumbfucked as I do?" You shook your head. "Cum." You did so, your throat was burning from all the times he left you screaming. Your pussy pulsated around his cock and he turned you around again so that you could face him. He grabbed your face with his hand and pressed a bruising kiss to your lips. He practically chewed down on your mouth now while chasing after his own orgasm. He grabs your phone again and your legs wrapped around his waist. "Look at that, look at you," he holds the phone over you and you wiped the trail of saliva from the corner of your mouth. He ends the video and tosses your phone aside. "Admit it, (Y/N), no one fucks you the way I do," he pushes into you and you felt his cock tense inside of you.

"Oh fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck me harder," you nodded your head and he cummed inside of you. You saw white spots around your vision as you felt him filling you. You fell limp against the bed and he lifted you up, you were only being supported by his arms around you now while he continued to shallow thrust into you. You were just struggling to catch your breath while you were slumped over him. "God, I fucking love you," the phrase just slipped out. Your voice was hoarse and your mind blank, but somehow your words still held weight. San just responds by kissing you softly.

"Dammit, (Y/N), I never stopped," he mutters against your tender lips and somehow this still felt sweet. San lays you down on the bed, still kissing you and still inside of you. How he's still hard was beyond you, so you knew he wasn't going to stop just yet. He separated from you and you held his face to stop him from going further.

"What are you looking at me like that for?" He asks quietly. Your hand falls to his neck.

"I still love you," you pulled him down onto you and he moans against your lips, a newfound fervor in his movements. "Fuck, I love you and it's driving me insane." You chanted it like it was a mantra. It was true. In all of the dates you'd gone on and in all of the hookups you've had, you always found yourself comparing them to your first love, your first boyfriend. And here you were, still fucking him after breaking up with him so long ago.

"Say it again," he fucked you at his own pace, cum gushing out around his cock and spotting the bed.

"I love you," you repeated. "I know I shouldn't, but I love you."

"Fuck, (Y/N)," he said before kissing you. He cummed inside of you again, it was less intense than before, but it was enough to leave you spiraling. You pressed your hips down on him and he groaned. "You're insatiable."

"You're worse," you fired back. "You're worse because you keep making me come back," you held his face in your hands.

"You make it hard to leave," he pulls out of you, cum flowing out of your pussy. You caught your breath now while San rolled next to you.

"I'm about to break that poor boy's heart," you grabbed your phone and your heart stopped. "Oh fuck."

"Whoops," San glances over you to see the sent audio message.

"I'm dropping out of orgo," you turned your phone off and rolled toward him, your face against his chest. "I can never look at him again, oh fuck."

"Well, shit happens, (Y/N)," he wraps his arm around you and rubs your back. "You okay though? Not sore anywhere?"

"Not yet, I'll call you tomorrow to let you know."

"Call me tomorrow?" He looks at you quizzically. "Nah, you're coming home with me tonight."

"Huh?"

"No, I'm not letting you go home looking like that," he grabs your dress from the floor and places it on the bed next to you. "This is hot, by the way." He pulls his shirt over his head.

"Is it?" You pulled the dress on.

"Yeah, you look good in black," he picks up your panty and shoved it in his pockets.

"Hey, I need that," you toss him his belt.

"Not tonight, you won't," he tosses his keys in his hand.

"San!" You follow him out of the room just in time for Yeosang and Wooyoung to stumble out of the bathroom.

"Good luck getting home, assholes," San chides at them. They drunkenly looked between the both of you.

"Did you two fuck?!" Wooyoung shouts over the music. But his question ultimately went unanswered while you followed San out of the party.

General Tag List: @stopeatread @bat-shark-repellant @raeincitizen @umbralhelwolf @yangsrose @kazooms @sadcoffeecritic

#ateez #ateez x reader #ateez fics #ateez x you #ateez x yn #san x reader #san x you #san x yn #ateez smut #san smut #my writings #smut #choi san x reader #choi san x you #choi san x yn #choi san smut

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tastesousweet · 2 months

Text

⭒ the girl with the tattoo (vi) - pt 1 pt 2 p3 p4 p5

matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader

summary : y/n can only deflect her crush on matt for so long

warnings : smut, banter/cuteness, angst at the end

mickey speaks : sooooooo. yeah. enjoy! (also i imagine lucas as luka sabbat)

THIS IS PART SIX GO READ THE OTHERS FIRST PLS

“I’M kind of hungry though,” you groan as you stand in front of your open and very bare (besides two scrawny carrots and a few of andrea’s energy drinks) fridge, pouted mouth and limp wrist holding your phone to your ear.

“i’m sure you are, you always seem to be fucking hungry,” matt’s attitude laces into his comment’s comedic undertone.

“don’t be mean,” you close the fridge and begin to look through the many cabinets in your kitchen that are somehow just as bare. “how the fuck are we completely out of food?!”

“ask your fuckin- move out of the way! go! now, move!” matt’s voice cuts into a rage as his attention directs to the cars around him, who he’d debate the validity of their drivers licenses.

his loudness has you pulling your phone away from your ear to let him finish, then bring it back towards you, “hey, let’s use our inside voices when on the phone with someone…” you smile at your own joke as you dig through a never ending junk drawer for a pen.

“hmm let’s go to the grocery store more often so we’re not having our sneaky link take us to eat,” his comeback is as quick as his lane switching.

“well you sure know how to make a girl feel special,” your sarcasm spews as you begin to write out a list for a much needed grocery trip with andrea tomorrow.

“what are you hungry for?” he speaks over the chimes of his turn signal.

“i don’t know,” you mumble clearly not too focused on figuring out what you’d like to eat.

“what’re you doing right now?” he asks.

“nothing,” you say while biting your inner cheek trying to remember the specific brand of orange juice that andrea recently discovered she prefers.

“okay, i’m pulling up in like five, figure out where you wanna go.”

“please?” you question where his manners are among the frequent demands he throws at you.

“mhm, that too.” he half-asses an agreement, “bye.”

you drop your pen and respond with a quick ‘bye’ before hanging up the phone and tucking it into your purse along with your keys.

౨ৎ

matt's car smells of warm citrus and eucalyptus, in contrast to the coolness of the air he currently has blowing. you glance over to him once you're settled into the leather passenger seat, giving you a view of his soft side profile and torso covered with one of his many black hoodies (as if california temperatures weren’t currently at their highest) that fit his figure well, as he focuses on adjusting his hair in the pull down mirror.

the only light source in the car comes in the soft, off-white lighting synced to the mirror, that shines just enough for you to see his full smirk and head shake when you joke, “got someone to look good for?”

he mutters a light, “barely,” before placing the mirror back against the ceiling and changing gears smoothly. “your babysitter didn’t question you?”

you shake your head and begin to buckle your seatbelt, “no, she’s out with some coworkers for a drink. what about yours?”

“didn’t even notice i left.” he shrugs then gestures to the navigation screen that’s now dimly lit, “where do you wanna eat?” your silence speaks volumes to him, “how'd i just know you'd pull this shit? i told you to have it figured out by the time you got in the car!” he groans and looks over to you.

you try to hide a smile due to his irritance, “okay, and what if i just don’t know, matt?!” your hands turn and face the ceiling to show the genuine unsureness of your appetite.

“then, you must not be that hungry,” he shrugs.

you redirect your eyes from him to the road in front of you, “i miss when you were quietly mean, now you’re all obnoxious and loud about it.”

a smirk finds its way to matt's face as he continuously looks from you to the road until you finally look back over to him. “sorry, that was also mean. i don’t hate when you talk, even though you’re rude as fuck.”

matt laughs off the apology he wasn't even seeking from you, “jesus, i wasn't gonna cry over it.”

your stomach is weeping and begging for you to pick a place to eat at this point causing you to lean your head against the window (though you find the vibrations from the motor and awkward dips from the road make the position more uncomfortable than anything) and eye the blurs of brightly lit, primary colored signs. it becomes a little dizzying but eventually slows as matt eases on the brakes.

during the brief pause you take time recognize your surroundings more and just as matt starts to go through the intersection, a breath gets caught in your throat when you spot a small local store you remember going to with remi for lunch a few months back, “wait!”

matt slams on his brakes with a sudden look of fear in his eyes, rocking the both of you far forward then slamming you back into the seats. his face turns to frustration when you laugh a little and ask, “can we stop at that bodega right there?” while pointing out the window.

he raises a hand in view of his back windshield to apologize to the person behind him as he speeds off again and scolds you, "do you have any fucking etiquette?"

"oh wow, that’s a big word for you, matt!" you celebrate. he then takes a sharp turn into the rural parking lot, making you grip the side door as you jump along with the car.

you watch as he easily parks the car and turns off the ignition with a huff, "i doubt some convenience store snacks are gonna hold you over, but whatever."

"never doubt a small local market, this place has a bomb ass hole-in-the-wall sandwich shop and you wouldn’t even know." you defend while opening the car door.

౨ৎ

you lead matt inside while he unashamedly stares at how your hips move as you walk- your skin naturally exposed due to your low waisted lounge pants and small tank top (which makes him want to do nothing more than squeeze, lick, and kiss the area).

you greet the bored cashier the way you tend to greet anyone: as if you know them, and make your way to the back side of the store, the smell of toasted bread gaining potence in the air as you approach.

matt continues to follow as he glances around the very average looking store, with aisles of typical name-brand foods and drinks.

you stop near a bulletin board with a makeshift menu and read over each option. when matt gets closer to you, you feel the need to explain yourself as if it wasn't clear enough, "'m tryin' to figure out what i want."

he only replies with an "mhm," as he focuses on options for himself.

you both take turns separately ordering and paying for food (of course you had to tease him for making it seem as though you being hungry was such a hassle) and find a small table to sit at.

you fiddle with the table caddy, "watch. this will be the best sandwich of your life."

matt sits opposite of you, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed, "better be. you had me driving crazy to get to this place."

"i said i was sorry about that!" you dramatically remind him of the apology you gave him when you two initally walked up to the store.

“order for y/n?” the same man (with a heavy east coast accent) you ordered from peeks his head out.

you send matt a smile before getting up and walking over to the window, “thank you so much, it smells amazing.” you compliment.

“‘course and, uh, we’ve got that second order ready as well if you want to take it over,” he offers.

“yeah, i’ll go ahead and take it.” you take the wrapped and acronym-labeled sandwiches in each hand, thanking him once more before beginning to walk over to the table.

“oh how sweet are you? bringin’ my sandwich to me and shit,” matt chuckles as he runs his tongue over his teeth casually.

“a ‘thank you’ would’ve been more than enough,” you take your seat again. the shuffles of wax paper wrapping and distant chimes of the bell near the entrance is the only noise surrounding both of you for your first few bites.

you pause eating to ask, “how’s your sandwich?” you direct your sandwich towards him as both of your hands are occupied in holding said sandwich.

he covers his mouth with a fist as he finishes chewing, nodding his head to give away his answer. he’s not really one to eat for flavor alone so his answer is mediocre, “yeah, it’s good. yours?” he questions while going in for another bite.

“so amazing,” you draw out and jokingly moan into your next bite.

matt’s face scrunches and he can’t wait until the food is out of his mouth to deliver his comment, “gross, just eat your food without all the effects.”

you put up your index finger so that you can swallow before replying, “you really have the nerve to say that through the shit ton of food in your mouth?”

he shrugs and gives a sarcastic smile with his cheeks bunched out and full of his sandwich.

you take a sip of your diet coke before asking, “‘kay, so what’d you do today?” you’re just generally curious and admittedly not the best at being quiet or reserved when around other people.

matt sighs, “you know…talking really takes away the point of this.”

“oh my god, answer the question. don’t be unfun, matt.”

“’m just tryin' to eat,” he laughs through his nose.

“okay, then i’ll go first but you still have to tell me about your day after,” you decide.

“fine,” matt uses a napkin to wipe his mouth a little.

“well, i woke up so fucking early today, i had to get to work by like 5:30 to start helping with an order of six cakes. luckily we prepped a lot the day before and carmen is like the best coworker to have to do that long shift with.”

“six cakes? for one order?”

“yeah, it was for a family reunion and they called about some dietary restrictions for certain cakes plus the different flavors- just shit to make our job harder. but love my job regardless, and the woman who picked them up looked so happy,” you take another sip of your drink, “but after that i went home and basically napped until you called.”

“this is the first thing you’re eating today?” he doesn’t care too much that you haven’t eaten today, rather uses it as an excuse to get you to continue eating so the you both can leave (or maybe this is just what he tells himself).

“i mean i ate some boiled eggs whenever i had down time at work, but yeah i guess.”

“and look at you, wasting your time yappin’ instead of eating. there’s truly no helping you,” he shakes his head slowly back and forth in faux disappointment.

you ignore him, “okay, your turn.” his eyebrows pinch and he takes a sip of his drink, telling you he won’t be answering if you don’t start to eat, “look! i’m eating,” you take a bite to prove yourself.

“right…uhh what did i do today?” he looks up in memory. “i tatted some guy’s face earlier, i guess that was a bit intense.”

“um, yeah that’s intense, what’d he get?!”

“the outline of peru above his cheekbone." matt circles the area on his own face, "it was actually really sentimental; he told this whole story about his mom immigrating here from peru.“

“that's so sweet. did he say why he wanted it on his face?”

matt shrugs, “he wanted to try somewhere he hasn’t before.”

you nod, “and was this your first face tat?”

“no, i’ve done a few before, just haven’t in a while.” matt leans back and scratches the back of his neck to stretch. “ever since i posted that pic of your tat i’ve been booked by all theses girls who want cartoon designs, now nick’s pissed i’m stealing his clientele since ‘it’s his specialty.’”

“well my hello kitty is precious so i can't blame them." you pause, "are you fucking these girls too?” you look at matt before you begin to giggle to yourself and take your final bite.

matt’s eyes widen and he lets a small laugh escape, “no, that kinda luck can only come so often. and how slutty would i be to hookup with all of my clients?” though he wouldn’t call you strictly a client anymore- but he doesn’t correct it since he’s unsure if the two of you are necessarily friends either.

“one: don’t hype yourself too much, two: there’s nothing wrong with being a slut, matt. you should embrace your nature.” you smile before gesturing to his last bit of sandwich and mocking, “catch up now, you’ve been doing all that talking and no eating! i'm starting to lose hope.”

౨ৎ

"matt, where the fuck are we?" you raise yourself up a little to look around. you’re parked in a large city center parking lot with few cars and dimming street lights.

“shhh, sit down.” he absentmindedly calms you, speaking in a low voice while typing on his phone. you lean back into your seat, bored enough that you opt to watching your hands rise and fall with your stomach as you breathe.

he continues tapping at the screen for the entirety of the next song, making you grow impatient and confused. is he expecting you to make the first move right now? did he bring you here to have sex? who the fuck is he texting?

you move yourself closer to him so that your elbows rest against the center console and hold your head up. "matt," you whisper.

he doesn't answer but you notice his eyebrows are furrowed and angled.

"matt," you repeat and guide your hand up his arm, firmly squeezing his shoulder.

"mm?" he looks over to you for a second, then out the windshield before his eyes fixate on his phone once more.

"what'd you bring me here for...?" your voice is laced with intentional seduction as your hand moves back down his arm to play with the slim silver bracelet hanging on the wrist of his occupied hand.

"y/n, hold on," somehow his voice is just as distracted as his eyes.

you pout, "can you, like, look at me?" you see him picking at the skin of his lip, only looking at you when your hair falls in front of his phone as you lean to press your lips to the hand you've been messing with.

he moves his hand to capture your bottom lip softly between his thumb and the side of his index finger, finally giving in with a small “yeah?”

before you get a word out a few taps hit matt’s window making both of you flinch and pull back. you’re so caught off guard and feel exposed in a way after having your face so close to matt’s lower half. you’re nervous as to why someone would randomly come to matt’s window, until matt willingly lowers it.

you move your head to the side to get a better view of the lanky man with deep caramel skin and arched dimples that pop when he speaks, “yooo, matt! what’s up?” they dap each other up through the open window.

“fucking finally,” matt sighs with a laugh.

he kisses his teeth, “look i got your shit right here. have some faith in me, brother.” he leans to grab a small bag from one of his cargo pant pockets as matt reaches for his sleek black wallet.

you try to keep yourself leveled and not ask a million questions about this whole predicament, but you’re feeling quite left out.

matt carelessly grabs the plastic bag from the guy while he continues to sift through his wallet with only one hand, before handing you the bag without even looking your way. once it’s in your hand you use the light of your phone to get a better look, noticing the unground weed in the bag. you scrunch your face and place it in your lap.

you don’t pick up on much of matt’s conversation until you’re brought up, “who’s your friend?” the guy leans further onto the car.

“no one you’d need to know,” matt shrugs, pulling out a few unscathed bills and handing them with a smile.

you squint your eyes at the insult to your existence he's implied calling you ‘no one,’ before reaching over matt with an extended hand, “hi, i’m y/n.”

he glances at matt, who’s shooting daggers into the side of your head with his eyes, then looks to you, “i’m lucas, nice to meet you.” his eyes and smile both very dopey.

“how’d you meet such a hush guy like matt?” you inquire and feel a smile forming as matt surprisingly allows you to continue this conversation.

“his brother nick does like all of my tattoos,” he pulls up his sleeve to show a collection of pieces in various styles. “next thing i know, i got three trusty customers!” he giggles and looks to matt who puts on an obvious fake smile. you turn your face to see him and feel yourself smile wider at his expense.

“yep…” matt replies.

you quickly turn back to lucas and look closer at his sleeve, “oh wow, nick is fucking talented.” matt fights from moving you back into your seat and driving off as fast as possible. “matt actually gave me one,” you lift yourself back into your seat, using matt’s thigh for support, and begin to move your shirt out of the way.

“hmm, right,” matt takes your shirt in his own hand to cover the spot once more, “we actually have somewhere to be like now.” he looks over to lucas and gives an impressively collected smile, “‘m sorry to cut it short, man. you know we gotta hang out soon.”

“for sure, i’ll have to text you," lucas nods, "and maybe i’ll see you around too, y/n. just stay pretty.” he points to you as he back away from the car. “get her home safe now, matthew.” he throws in the extra joke.

“uh huh, thanks for the smoke,” matt chuckles dryly and gives a bitter half-ass peace sign before rolling his window up. he looks over to you, with your legs sprawled in an awkward yet comfortable way and full smile on your flushed face, “fuck are you smilin’ about?”

“you brought me here for a fucking drug deal?!” you try to control the laugh in your throat.

“look you got your sandwich, i got my weed,”

“i don’t think those are com-” you mumble even though matt’s words never pause for you.

“we both were dragged somewhere, so it’s fair.” matt shrugs with pouted lips as he lifts the center console in search of the dope he’d just bought, “where’d you put it?” you then hold the bag up for him to see, but as he reaches for it you move back slightly. “you’re not funny, dude, give it.”

“come get it,” you look at the bag then over to matt’s unentertained face.

“y/n, that shit won’t work on me. we’re in my car and you don’t know the first thing about rolling.” he props his hand up expecting you to give up at this point. “stop playing.”

“why can’t you just play a little matt? you’re so worked up and mad most of the time,” your cheeks puff a little when you let out an annoyed breath.

“i wouldn’t say mad but,” matt’s eyes widen with the word in exaggeration but he knows you don’t actually want to debate over his mood so he recovers smoothly, moving his body to fully face you, “ alright, we can play, sweetheart.”

he leans closer, “how about about we play you give me my shit and then i’ll fuck you,” in reality the bag of weed is easily within snatching range, but the tension of coercing it out of you entertains matt more.

“that’s not a fun trade when you were gonna do that anyway,” the way your full lips move has matt itching to lay them against his own.

“no i wasn’t,” he whispers, and now that you’ve both now gravitated towards each other, practically at each other’s faces, you get a special view of his eyes and the way his cheeks pinch inward when he lies.

“really?”

he plays along, nodding while looking down in faux disappointment, though you can see him start to hide a giggle of some sort.

“damn. maybe i’ll have to take your phone next and get lucas to come back for me.” you sigh, and go to reach for his phone.

matt grabs your hand looks back to your devious face. “hell no, keep my friends off your roster.”

you purse your lips, “oh really? but you can do whatever you want with my-?” you’re cut off with a small kiss that grows as you reciprocate.

you’re too caught up in the proximity and heat to focus on matt’s hand that finds and takes the bag without fight. he pulls away (far too quickly) just to tease, “too easy.” he holds the bag up and stashes it in his side door. “and now you’ll have to wait until we get back to mine.”

౨ৎ

matt's beyond frustrated when he shows up to find his driveway lined with cars and general rowdiness that can be seen through the windows. you had some jokes at his expense to make as he drove off and away from his house to find the street you're currently parked on.

he's pretty silent until he eventually gets over himself due to his extreme horniness he's suppressed for longer than he expected when calling you. "well, 'm sorry my house is a bit occupied at the moment."

you face him, "no, it's fine." you unbuckle your seatbelt and move to hover over his face, placing a small kiss on his lips then pulling away, "right?"

matt raises his head to look at you, making you glance away from his eyes and down to his lips as you lick your own. and just as your tongue slips back into your mouth, matt is recapturing your lips in a needy kiss.

as the kiss deepens he takes a hold of the area where your head and neck split, holding any of your hair there with it. your tongue plays against his lips before he finally allows you to feel into his mouth a little.

you both kiss and play with each others' lips as he moves his hands to feel down your waist and tug on your waistband to urge you closer to him. you don’t listen though, instead greedily enjoying the slow movement of your lips.

matt pulls away at your disobedience and reclines his seat in one swift motion. you sigh to yourself at the loss of contact, still angled oddly over the center as you bite your bottom lip to mimic matt’s kiss.

he pats his lap and reaches for your arm, softly demanding, “c’mere.” with his physical encouragement you move your body to crawl onto him and settle easily in his lap. matt’s eyes never leave the place where your bodies meet as his hands squeeze at your hips and then your ass.

you lean down to kiss at his neck, causing your boobs to go into matt’s line of sight. he brings his hands up to give them a small squeeze before reaching into your tiny tank top to expose them fully.

you moan into his neck and lift yourself up to watch as matt swirls his tongue around your left nipple while caressing the right. “mmm,” you hum and encourage while your hands play with the hair at the nape of matt’s neck.

he lets go of one with a small pop, muttering “you’re so hot,” against the other. as your hips grind softly you can feel his dick, heavy and hard under you. he pauses his play, “you feel it, sweetheart, go ahead and do somethin’ about it.”

you moan softly and begin to grind against him. he continues to suck and fiddle with your nipples until they're sensitive and causing you to whine.

you then slowly adjust your tits back into place and crawl lower, watching your head of the wheel and watching your legs of the pedals. matt assumingly leans back and plays with the drawstring of his shorts while licking his lips, watching your every move. and finding it very fucking hot that you want to suck his dick so bad you’d sit on the rough, brushed carpet of his car.

you run your fingers up his thighs and beg with your eyes for matt to show himself to you. eventually, he purses his lips and begins to adjust his pants lower, relieving his member of anticipation.

you bite at your bottom lip subconsciously as you adjust yourself closer to him. matt keeps hold of the base, tapping himself against your closed mouth a few times, before you reveal your tongue to him. you run your mouth over him once before gathering your sticky saliva to spit softly on his tip. matt whines at the sensation and grows louder the second you take him fully into your mouth.

the way his eyebrows ruffle together and his mouth forms the most perfect ‘o’ shape is so breathtaking and drives you to continue working him in hopes that he only grows needier.

one of his hands finds the back of the headrest to grip while the other begins to move your hair for you into a harsh, makeshift ponytail. “mmm, fuck. keep goin’, baby.”

you allow all of him into your mouth, reaching the back of your throat before you pull off of him and begin to use your hand on his slick cock. “you like that?” you ask and you look so innocent and so genuinely intrigued at his answer that he can only answer in a groan. you kiss his tip in your own exchange of words with him without actually saying anything, then swirl your tongue around it as you bring him back into your wet mouth.

“yeah- just like that, mmm.” his voice is rough and strained a little as he guides your head continuously. your pace changes over the next few strokes, growing rapid and sloppier with time. matt's low moans and words of encouragement leave you feeling both desperate for his release and your own pleasure and fulfillment he'd give you afterwards.

without warning you, he takes hold of your head and forces himself fully in your mouth, unapologetically spilling his cum down your throat. once he's slumped and breathing heavily you pull off of him, a string of grotesque spit attaching you and his spent dick, and wipe your face with the back of your hand softly.

you force him to make room for you and sit up as you crawl back into his lap, the skin of your knees indented with the carpet's texture. "you're so fucking good," matt compliments in a daze while holding the bridge of his nose.

you kiss the corner of his open mouth and smirk, "too easy."

౨ৎ

"why does it keep biting me?!" chris yelps.

you and andrea never expected to own any kind of pet in recent years, due to both of your awkward schedules and mutual irresponsibility for your actions (finding it appropriate that you both learn to care for yourselves before an animal, no matter how tempting). but that was before you both found a tiny black kitten near a local bus stop that almost had you in tears.

you scooped him up easily and held him in your lap the entire drive home with andrea looking over and cooing at each red light she'd hit.

the entire day was spent googling, then bathing him, then googling if it was okay to use dish soap on a baby kitten, all while you both were clawed at and splashed the entire time.

but you and andrea have settled into cat motherhood well. recently you both went half on buying a cat tree (that is honestly way too big for your tiny living area) and decided to get your friends to help build it.

"he probably doesn't like you," nick suggests while twisting a screwdriver, legs sprawled on the floor.

"i'm sure he doesn't like anything with a name like figaro." chris deepens his voice when stating the cat's name and rolls his eyes.

"shut up, chris!" andrea calls from the kitchen.

"y/n, do you guys have any batteries?" erin asks as she opens the packaging of the cat toy she brought as a gift for figaro.

you smile at the ball of black fur at her side, clumsily punching the cardboard and plastic wrapping before nodding your head and placing your glass on the table, "yeah, which kind?"

"uh, triple a, three of them please."

you head to a closet down the hall to gather the batteries, fumbling with the top shelf a little. you don't hear when the bathroom door next to you opens and matt walks out, only recognizing when you hear his voice, "need some help?"

"no, thank you," you glance at him behind you and smile, giving a final stretch to reach the packaging. "see?" you show him the package in your hand proving he had no reason to even ask.

he smirks and stops you from closing the closet door just yet, "you look nice." you thank him and aren't surprised at what falls from his mouth next, "kinda need to paint with you soon."

"i'm sure you do," you almost laugh, due to both matt's undying horniness and the continued reference to painting.

he looks into your eyes carefully as he feels for your side and swipes his thumb over your tattoo. his mouth comes closer, right below your ear, "i'm not playin', i miss it." he leaves a kiss at the spot before he backs away and places his hands together in a prayer position, rocking them back and forth, mouthing "please."

the both of you almost laugh just before he turns to walk back to the group and remi calls for you to bring her a drink on your way back.

only when you're back in the living room your smile, matt once put on your face, drops as your eyes immediately catch erin and matt talking, her leg leaning far onto his as he reads the instructions and makes dry jokes about the toy she'd bought figaro.

you dont interrupt, placing the batteries near erin and taking a seat next to remi. you don't let your emotions manifest in your actions, even if you're starting to feel it a little extra when matt manages to remind you that you really are nothing but a nice fuck to him.

꩜⋆ ˚｡⋆🎱˚

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