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#me and my broken mirror against the world
bipolarbabyyy · 14 days
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gonna be a soft girl summer 💓🎀🌸
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cynopoe · 3 months
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My Genshin OC Ambrosia, name not decided for certain, and Zandik. I took some liberties with the storyline. She is a Khaenri’ah noble who left to Sumeru to study at Akademiya. She and Zandik met there and got off not so swimmingly at first. The Cataclysm happened when she was finishing up her studes. She then left to help save her family. She was thought to be dead when Zandik was expelled from his Darshan. Their reunion happens after the events of Sumeru.
Some close-ups to their faces
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pinchofhoney · 7 months
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broken promises, part one
part one | part two | part three »
coriolanus snow x fem!reader
word count: 1.8k
warning: none
summary: In Snow's world, only one thing mattered more than his family's reputation—you. But that was before he met Lucy Gray.
a/n: coryo is the type of person i sincerely hate and i'm glad that there are no such arrogant people in my life, who think they are better than others and who in crisis situations only care about themselves and to save their own arse. but at the same time i'm aware that young snow could be someone i'd catch a crush on at school. so why shouldn't i hate him even more?
pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for
taglist: you told me to tag you everywhere, so i'm back to doing it again; @wolfmoonmusic
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gif is not mine, credit to the owner
The problem with snow is its tendency to melt, mirroring the way we once thought our feelings would endure forever. Yet, shouldn't emotions, particularly those nestled in our hearts, last longer?
You had known Coriolanus since childhood, and your families had always been close. You had grown up together, surviving the hardships of the war-torn Capitol side by side, and now, in the post-war era, you were still inseparable. There was an unspoken understanding between the two of you going above a simple friendship. Your connection ran deep, like the roots of the oldest trees in the Panem's forests.
Coriolanus was an intriguing character, a puzzle you had been solving together since you were children. He was the embodiment of Capitol charm, with his perfectly tailored suits, polished manners, and charismatic smile that could sway even the most skeptical of Capitol elites. But you knew that beneath that carefully constructed facade was a mind as sharp as a blade and a heart that carried the weight of his family's fallen reputation.
Yet, when he was with you, it was as if a different side of him emerged. The hard lines on his face softened, and his icy demeanor melted away. With you, he could be himself, unburdened by the expectations of Capitol society. It was a rare glimpse into the man behind the mask, and you cherished those moments even more than your favorite jasmine tea and the cat you found shortly after the war had ended.
You couldn't help but admire his intelligence, his quick wit, and his relentless determination to succeed in a world that often seemed stacked against him. His family's name might have been tarnished, but Coriolanus was determined to reclaim their lost glory. He was driven by a burning ambition that flickered like an eternal flame, and you were his unwavering support, the one who fanned that flame to keep it burning bright.
In your eyes, he was more than the sum of his flaws and ambitions. He was the boy you had shared secrets with under moonlit skies, the man who had held you when the world crumbled around you, and the person who knew you better than anyone else. With him, you felt safe, cherished, and loved in a way that no one else could replicate.
Your love for him was boundless, and you were content in the knowledge that you were his confidante, the one person he could be truly vulnerable with. Your relationship with Coriolanus was the envy of many in academy, a seemingly perfect match of two souls intertwined by fate and affection. You were the golden couple, a shining example of love and devotion in a world that often lacked both.
But you wished you had known sooner that it's often the things we love most that destroy us, as Coriolanus Snow's world was about to collide with that of a girl named Lucy Gray and you were not ready for it to happen.
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As the day of the tribute's arrival approached, you had been by Coriolanus's side more than ever. The weeks leading up to this moment had been filled with your unwavering support. You had reassured him countless times, sitting together in your cozy bedroom, his head resting gently on your thighs while you combed your fingers through his soft blonde curls. It was a calming gesture, one that had become a comforting routine. You listened to his concerns, his fears, and his ambitions, and you were sure that everything would be fine, that he would be just perfect as a mentor, and that his scholarship and dreams of continuing his studies at the university were within reach.
Your words were like a soothing melody to him, a reminder that he wasn't alone in this daunting new role. He would look into your eyes with his cold ones, filled with gratitude, and you could see the weight lifting from his shoulders, if only temporarily. And in those moments, you felt like his anchor, the one who kept him grounded amid the chaos of his own thoughts.
Now, you both stood at the nearly deserted train station, the oppressive heat of the day hanging heavily in the air. The scorching sun beat down relentlessly, casting shimmering waves of heat across the empty platform. It seemed that most of the Capitol's citizens had chosen to stay indoors, seeking refuge from the sweltering weather.
The only other souls present were a handful of stoic peacekeepers, their pristine white uniforms stark against the dull backdrop of the station. The silence was broken only by the distant hum of the city beyond, a reminder of the bustling Capitol life that lay just outside the station's borders.
Coriolanus tightly held a single white rose plucked from his grandmother's garden, a symbol of his intent to make a lasting impression on his tribute. It was a stark contrast to the vibrant colors of your academy uniforms. The simplicity of the white rose spoke of his sincerity and dedication to this new role as mentor.
With no clear timetable for the tribute train's arrival, the two of you stood patiently, pretending that the day's weather didn't bother you, the weight of uncertainty hanging over you like a heavy cloud. Coriolanus shifted his gaze between the tracks and the single white bloom in his hand.
You observed him closely, and when his gaze finally met yours, you offered a reassuring smile. “Remember, Coryo,” you murmured, “no matter what, you'll be the mentor she needs; your sincerity and kindness will shine through.”
“I hope you're right, Y/N,” he replied softly, his voice filled with a hint of doubt. “I need her to survive on the arena as long as she can,” he added, as if the idea of a group of vulnerable youths engaging in brutal competition in just a few days were the most ordinary occurrence in the world.
But that was precisely what it represented for the Capitol residents – the Hunger Games, an annual spectacle of entertainment.
Time seemed to stretch endlessly under the unrelenting sun, and the station remained eerily devoid of any signs of life. It felt as though hours had passed, but in truth, you couldn't be sure. Beads of perspiration formed on your brows, and you could feel the heat radiating from the platform's surface.
You and Coriolanus were on the verge of giving up and returning to the cool embrace of your penthouses when, at long last, the distant rumble of an oncoming train reached your ears. The sound grew steadily louder, and you looked at each other, exchanging tired glances.
Coriolanus's grip on the white rose tightened as he turned his gaze towards the approaching train. As he rose from the bench where you had sat, his anticipation peaked. You stood beside him, wanting to be his support, but you had no idea that your role was about to change very soon.
The train pulled into the station with a hiss of steam and the screech of brakes, billowing clouds of moisture and smoke into the scorching air. The two of you watched the machine in silent, your heart pounding in your chest. This was the moment when you would come face to face with people from the Districts, individuals whose lives were so far removed from the opulence and extravagance of your own. It was a rare and humbling experience, one that left you with a slight quiver in your step as you clung to Coriolanus, seeking solace in his reassuring presence.
For what felt like an eternity, nothing happened. The train's doors remained sealed shut, as if holding its cargo of tributes in a reluctant embrace. The only thing that reached you was an unpleasant stench wafting from the carriages, a stark reminder of the grim reality that these young souls were about to face.
Finally the impatient peacekeepers took matters into their own hands. They descended upon the train, their authoritative presence enough to scare the tributes out of their temporary sanctuary. One by one, they were herded onto the platform, their expressions ranging from fear to defiance.
And then, your eyes locked onto a figure unlike the others. A girl stood there, her presence a stark contrast to the muted palettes of others tributes. She wore a rainbow-colored dress that shimmered with vibrancy, a flare of color and individuality amidst the sea of old attire. You recognized her immediately from the television screens, a girl whose name had already become a part of your daily life even before this encounter.
Lucy Gray Baird.
The very name whispered in the hushed tones of Capitol citizens as they watched her on the screens, intrigued and fascinated by her enigmatic presence from the Reaping. Her gaze swept across the platform, and for a brief moment, your eyes locked onto each other's.
You couldn't help but break into a warm, welcoming smile. With a cheerful wave of your hand, you signaled to her that both you and Coriolanus were eagerly awaiting her arrival, hoping to ease the initial tension of this life-altering moment.
Lucy Gray's response was a hesitant yet appreciative smile in return. Her steps were slow and cautious as she walked slowly toward you, a palpable sense of curiosity radiated from her, her eyes flitting between the unfamiliar faces that lined the platform.
Your gaze briefly shifted to Coriolanus, a subtle expectation in your heart that his eyes would mirror the warmth you felt. But when you looked at him, you noticed something different. It was as if his eyes were magnetically drawn to Lucy Gray, locked onto her with a nearly unwavering intensity that bordered on fixation. Those eyes, usually so sharp and calculating, now held an expression you had never quite seen before. It was as though he had stumbled upon a priceless museum exhibit, left captivated, awestruck, and undeniably intrigued.
A soft, knowing smile played at the corners of your lips, silently acknowledging his reaction to the girl before you. You gently squeezed his hand, a gesture of affection and solidarity. You understood that this moment bore immense significance for him, that he was on the corner of a journey filled with unforeseen challenges. Lucy Gray was the keynote of this new chapter in his life, and you couldn't help but admire her from a distance, captivated by her unique presence and the aura that surrounded her.
Before you could utter a word, Coriolanus took a determined step forward, his eyes still locked on the girl. He extended his hand, offering her the pristine white rose he had clutched throughout the wait and with a subtle nod, he greeted her in a tone that resonated with formality and welcome.
“Welcome to the Capitol.”
part two »
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14thgalerie · 7 months
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dreamin' of him
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• pairing: theodore nott x reader
• now playing: a little death by the neighbourhood / fuck it i love you by lana del rey
• word count: 5.7k
• genre: fluff
— a part of this is inspired by this scenario i saw on tiktok, can't exactly remember it which vid it was. anyways enjoy this little random scenario that i'm pretty sure is horrible because i didn't bother to proofread it again.
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You shot right up from your sleep, limbs tangled in the sheets that had been strewn about haphazardly. The room is still as dark as it had been when you fell asleep with only the faint light of the full moon serving as your guiding light.
You drop your head onto your hands that sit on your folded knees, pressing the heels of your palm into your eyes until you can only see white. Ignoring the pain only so that you can be rid of the images that keep flashing in your mind.
It was excruciating, it played like a broken VHS record on your parents’ television back home. Every millisecond, a frame of you in such a vulnerable embrace with–
No. Y/N, stop it.
You were grappling with your sanity, feeling yourself incredulous at how such an idea came to fruition in your mind. Several nights’ on the end of this senseless, out-of-the-world dream that popped out of nowhere. The both of you hardly spoke with one another, for Merlin’s sake.
Throwing your head back, giving up on forcing the images out of your thoughts. Your head was spinning. Slamming your temple against the solid, wooden headboard behind you until you hear a ring resonating through your ears.
How did you let yourself get into this? What happened that you are being haunted— if that’s what you would even call it — by these dreams?
It’s been days of sleepless nights and you are plain tired. He must have cursed you. There was no other reason for this, right? He could be annoying when he wanted to be.
With your back resting on the headboard, you see that your dorm mates haven’t gotten back yet. Still, you remain seated as you wonder where they are, staring at the open window to your right.
“You’re the only one that can do this to me, Y/N…”
You gasp and sit straight, slapping your forehead with your open palm, trying to chase the image away. Throwing a glance at your watch that sits on the bedside table, you see that it’s only an hour and a half before you are supposed to wake up.
Exhaling loudly, you shove the blankets away from your body, feeling a warmth creep up on you. Maybe a good, cold, and long shower will distract you for good.
Grabbing a change of clothes, you head straight for the bathroom in your dorm. Now’s one of the few times you are glad that the dorms at Hogwarts have their own showers. 
Looking at the small, worn mirror above the sink, you chuckle humorlessly at how disheveled your appearance is. Anyone who sees you right now might think that your dreams are last night’s reality.
Stepping under the painful cold water, your body unconsciously jolts at the shock. 
Thinking about it makes your heart race. It gives you jitters, too. The feeling wasn't much to your liking. It was distracting. Not to mention it made you feel so... vulnerable. A shiver ran up your spine. You paused for a breath to calm your heightened nerves.
This has to end soon. You couldn’t stand another night spent thinking of him, of all people.  
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“I uh- I need to go.” You cough, clearing your throat, hands shaking slightly as you move to stand up. “I still have this essay for Potions.” 
“What- Hey wait, Y/N!” Harry reaches out, nearly missing your arms. 
“Why are you suddenly running off? It’s not due until next week?” Giving you a worried look. “Are you alright?”
“Yes, Harry. I feel extraordinarily perfect, I just- I wanna go back to my room right now.” You sigh, looking up at him. Your body remains tense under his tight grip. “So please let me go.”
Harry tries to not look disappointed, giving a quick glance back at your two other friends who watch you in silence. “Alright then, but if you need anything, you know where to find us.”
Giving him a small nod before pivoting in your heel, you walked straight to the Great Hall's large entryway. You ignored the way your skin burned with the intensity of the searing eyes that had locked onto you since its entry. 
“Why did you leave in such a hurry?” A cool voice asks from behind you. 
You freeze.
“Pardon?” You conjure up a reply, bluntly.
“Ok- what’s got your knickers in a twist?” 
“Nothing!” You reply defensively. Wanting nothing more than to be back within the confines of your dorm room.
“Alright, alright. I got it.” The cool, calm voice waves off an erratic rhythm to your heart. You continue to stare forward along the corridor, paying no mind as he circles around until there is a face attached to the voice. “I was just wondering why you skittered out of the Hall faster than when you were caught by Filch with the Weasley twins.”
Tilting your chin towards your chest, “What do you want, Nott?”
“Nothing.” He shrugged, “I was just curious, that is all.”
You scoff at the mockery clear in his tone. “Seriously, what is it? Because if you’re only here to be an annoying twat, I have better places to be.” 
You purposely bump into his shoulder as you make your way past him. Not in the mood to play along with him right now. Not when that stupid smirk of his is reeling images that you have been tirelessly trying to be rid of. Images that are the cause of your cranky attitude in the mornings.
From the corner of your eyes, you see him cock his head slightly to the right. Another thing you hate. He becomes more incessantly annoying when you are visibly annoyed by him.
“Nott.” You warn.
“What?“ He asks, amusement clear in his tone. “Am I not allowed to walk the same grounds that you do now?”
“Walk elsewhere. I am quite sure that you know of other paths from here to wherever you are to go. With your many endeavors, it’ll be stupid if you didn’t.” You murmur the latter under your breath.
“What was that?” He catches up to you, walking leisurely with his long legs. “Didn’t quite hear that last part properly.”
Before you could reply, a shout from the courtyard called both of your attention. A redhead girl from Ravenclaw was waving in your direction. You turn to look at Theodore who has now turned his sight back to you.
“I think she’s waiting for you.” You swiftly walk towards your house tower, making haste before he follows you again.
Unbeknownst to you, his stare remains fixated on you until your figure disappears around the corner. Only then does he wave back at the girl and make a quick return to the Hall where he left his friends mid-conversation. 
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 It wasn’t the last that you see of Theodore after, nor was it the last morning when you woke up groggy and irritated at the lack of sleep. It seems that since then, the both of you find yourselves orbiting each other much more often than before.
Not that you found it all disappointing. 
There were times that he was a good companion to have around— forget the hooded eyes that left you conscious every time. When he isn’t being an annoying twat, he knew how to hold a conversation with you; your lack of similarities is a good point as you were able to share things that the other didn’t know of.
But in truth, Theodore searched for you. In the boisterous chatters of students in the corridors, between the towering bookshelves of the library, through the window of the dimly lit Potions classroom where he has a clear view of Hagrid’s hut where you and your friends frequent.
He looks for you in all places, unable to help himself from an attempt to have a glimpse of you.
He did give his best efforts to tuck away his inexplainable attraction to you recently, and he wouldn’t dare admit that there is even a chance that he does. His denial was a fortress but cracks appeared within its walls with each time he talks to you.
“She’s at the Hospital Wing.” Blaise hesitatingly brings up. 
He almost jerks up from his comfortable position on the couch where he and Blaise are observers of their other friend’s drunken endeavors. But he manages to grab a hold of himself before the other notices.
“Why bother telling me?” His forced indifference is not as apathetic as he wished it to be. “I don’t care.”
“Oh shut up, Theo. I have never seen you so utterly fond of another girl like you do with her.” Blaise retracts back to what he was gonna say, “Anyways, I hear she will be a volunteer ahead of the Quidditch match this Sunday.”
He doesn’t reply, letting the words of his friend slip from one ear to another. You were interesting. He was unsure how, in the many years you’ve known one another, that you caught his eye now.
“She’s nice, not unlike some of her friends at Gryffindor.” Blaise continues with his taunting, eager to see a reaction from Theo. “Even managed to convince me to be her partner for Herbology.”
Theo makes a noise in a mix between a scoff and a chuckle. “From the sound of how you speak of her, it’s like you’re the one that has caught butterflies.”
Blaise simply hums, nodding to himself. “Maybe.”
Not another word slips from him again. The silence of his relinquishment makes Theo’s heart skip a nervous beat. Blaise never gives up that easily.  
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“Hello there.” A voice makes you look up from your book which you have been drowned in since hours ago. To your surprise, it was Blaise. 
“What are you doing here?” You ask. Curious why he had so suddenly appeared beside you while you were studying. You scour your brain, trying to remember if you had a project with him that ultimately passed by you.
“Go to Hogsmeade with me later.” Blaise blurts out while you gather your books that are scattered along the table. 
“Huh?” You look up at him with wide eyes. You give out a confused laugh. Maybe you didn’t understand him, right? “Did I hear you right? Hogsmeade? The two of us?”
“Well, don’t make it sound like it’s such an atrocious thing.” He makes a sound of mock offense; even making the choice to put a hand above his chest. To which you vehemently shake your head.
“Gosh no! It’s just-“ You trail off. “Why all of a sudden?”
“Nothing at all…” He shrugs, but that look on his face tells you entirely different. The mischievous expression that is ever so slightly slipping through. “Just wanted to hang out with a good friend of mine.”
You look at him with a confused frown, unsure of what he’s doing. “Since when were we good friends? Last I checked we only talked every now and then and it was really only just for projects.”
“Just come with me, will you?” 
“No.” You shake your head to further make your point. “Tell me why first and maybe I’ll consider.”
Blaise sighs, giving up. He had expected that you would not be giving in so easily to his request, after all, you weren’t really that close. But he still thought that it was worth the try, he is tired of Theo acting like he’s better than his emotions. He decides to tell you.
Well… somewhat.
“Alright, lady. I want to make a friend of mine jealous.” You hummed, listening intently. Wondering why he chose you to do it. “Also, because you’re the only person that I genuinely enjoy hanging with from other houses.”
“Will you tell me who’s the friend?” You ask.
“No.” He quickly replies, “But Y/N…I’ll treat you with anything you want at the Three Broomsticks or wherever else. Just please.” He draws out the please, adding hints or really a dump load of sweetness to it to charm you.
You think for a second more before finally giving him a nod. “Ok, but you’ll have to come with me to Honeydukes. Payback for doing whatever it is you’re planning.”
“You can have whatever you want. I’ll wait for you by the Fat Lady.” Blaise tells you before walking off with a huge grin on his face. 
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“Y/N?”
And when you turned your head, a surprised Blaize looked at you with a smile, apparently he had just been in mid-conversation with a fellow Slytherin as he hung about the entrance.
He whistled as he wasted no time approaching you, waving a curt goodbye to his previous companion. 
“Remind me why you never wear clothes other than your uniform?” He asks, his eyes unabashedly trailing over you. Though not in a predatory way that leaves you uncomfortable.
“Because it’s a hassle having to think of an outfit when I could just put a uniform on and call it a day.”
He hums, nodding as he thought about it.
“Well you look good in your non-school clothes, you should wear them more often.” He suggests, although he quickly amends it. “Not that I’m saying you don’t look great normally, it’s just nice to see how you would personally choose the clothes you wear. It kind of reflects a lot of your personality more.”
The two of you make no rush as you travel to Hogsmeade along with the other students, chuckling at the eager third-years who are freely roaming around. Engaging in small talk all the way. 
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“What’s got you in such a sour mood?” You rolled your eyes at Theo, who has done nothing but glare at Blaise who sits beside you with such harsh blinding venom. “If all you plan to do here is to murder Blaise in a million ways inside your mind, then please do it some other time.”
The man beside you couldn’t help the amused choke that escapes him as he sips his glass of Butterbeer.
Theo finally breaks his lone stare down and shifts his attention to you. “Since when did you two hang about by yourselves?”
“We always have-“ Blaise starts to explain but he is cut off by a kick to his shin that makes his knee jerk up and hit the table. 
“I wasn’t talking to you.”
His eyes remained fixated on you still, a medley of emotions behind them that you couldn’t exactly pinpoint. 
“Well, Y/N? I’m waiting for you here.” He impatiently asks. “Are you two on a date?”
“Theo, if you think that we are, then why did you even come here?” You roll your eyes at whatever antics that the both of them are trying. Not realising that you called him by his nickname, usually reserved for his close friends.
“Well-“ He stammered, unable to explain why exactly did he approach you all of a sudden. “Blaise doesn’t have that good of a reputation with girls and I wanted to make sure he’s not trying anything with you.”
Blaise clears his throat in an attempt to remind his friend that he is still sitting at the table, clearly within earshot of whatever slander he’s being put to.
“I can hardly think of a reason why you would if he does, but we were just having a conversation as friends, Theo.” You finally answer. “Is it that much of a surprise that I tolerate one of you?”
“He wants it to be him.” The man beside you mutters under his breath which you ignore, thinking it is only a jab.
Theo once again kicks Blaise under the table, making the latter swear under his breath.
While the two of them bicker like they are some man-child, you spot Hermione and the rest of your friends coming in through a tiny door and sitting at a table by the staircase. You scoot over until you are out of the seat, glad that you chose to sit at the open end of the table, without making a noise.
You make quick haste to transfer to your friends' table without garnering attention from the two Slytherin boys.
“Hide me.” You drop your heavy body on the seat beside Harry, trying your best to hunch over his relatively short upper body. 
The three instead laugh at your obvious demise, Ron not even trying to hide his amusement with such a burst of boisterous laughter. Unlike you, the three had noticed how Theodore Nott had been seen beside you much more often than necessary. At first, it was nothing that they really paid attention to, but when you told them of your otherwise eventful dreams…they began to have other thoughts.
It was clear that both of you were attracted to one another except for yourselves. And it’s been a hilarious sight to be an audience to but they are beginning to tire of your constant zoning off when the other is in your peripheral.
“What even is with you and Blaise coming to Hogsmeade together?” Ron asks. “I thought you liked Nott.”
You exhaled in exasperation, “How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t like him.” Gritting your teeth and clenching your jaw at the blatant teasing. “I am seriously beginning to regret telling you about my dreams.”
You watch as Harry stands to grab drinks for the rest of you guys, trying to explain why you came here. Not forgetting to mention how Theo had suddenly the conversation you’ve been having with Blaise. 
You were shocked to find that the both of you actually shared a lot of the same interests in various aspects; books, music, values, name it all. So despite your previous disinclination to agree with his idea that you would get along well, you thoroughly enjoyed the short time that you spent alone. 
His genuine interest in the many muggle creations that you’ve mentioned has made you all giddy. Telling him of all and everything that he must try, making a mental note to give him some things that you have in your dorm.
On the other end, Blaise shared a few of his interests with you— though it was only very few, given that the wizarding world does not really pay much attention to those kinds of things, especially the purebloods. 
“So just because he bribed you with anything you want from Honeydukes, you agreed? Y/N!” Hermione exclaims, to which you only answer her with wide eyes. 
“What?” You ask, furrowing your eyebrows at the bewildered expression on her face. 
“You’ve been to Hogwarts for how many years now and yet you have no idea what going to Hogsmeade with only one person insinuates?”
“Uh- What?”
“That you two are going on a date of course?” She practically scolds you. Maybe you shouldn’t laugh at Ron anymore when she becomes like this. It's no joke that it feels like you could be the stupidest person on the planet.
“We’re only friends, for Merlin’s sake! Well, we became friends today.” You roll your eyes. “It’s not my fault that is what might people think.”
Harry and Ron look at each other with more than amused grins on their faces.
“I think I finally know why Nott was practically making the snow melt under his feet earlier,” Ron remarks. To which you give him a confused look, unsure what he meant.
“What?”
“Well, before we came in here, we saw Nott almost stomp his way to here. I swear that I actually saw steam coming out of his ears.” Ron exaggeratingly shares, taking a sip out of his pint glass. “I thought he was about to burn this place down to ashes with how he looked so mad.”
That explains why he’s being more moody than usual.
“What’s that got to do with Blaise and I?” You finally ask the question that’s been brewing in you since he mentioned it.
But the only response you get is a look of disbelief from all three of them. Each one just about screaming “Are you being serious?” without saying anything.
“Are you truly that dense Y/N?” Harry asks, his hand reaching out to pat you on the shoulder.
You push him off, glaring at him. “No, but seriously what do you mean?”
“Even Harry and Ron, oblivious as they come, recognise that Nott has some kind of interest in you.” Hermione explains, “I don’t even know if he realised it himself but the two of you are oozing love hearts everywhere you go. It’s torture to see how you both ignore it.”
You're left dumbfounded, feeling her cheeks flush with embarrassment at the mere suggestion. Your thoughts racing as you consider Hermione's words. Theodore Nott, the mysterious and enigmatic Slytherin, having an interest in you? It was a revelation that sent your mind reeling, and you couldn't help but wonder if you had been completely oblivious to his feelings all along.
No. That’s just… wrong. This had to be another one of their pranks again. Ever since you confided in them of your dreams, they’ve been ceaselessly teasing you with Theo. Yeah, this must be it.
You chose to respond in a haughty tone, in an attempt to mask her flustered feelings. “Gosh, if this is what spurs in your minds when I tell you about my struggles at night, then I’d rather just keep them to myself from now on. Find something else to speculate about.” 
Unbeknownst to you, while you were so flustered trying to deny anything and everything they say of you and Theo, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had mentally orchestrated a plan. Harry subtly made a signal to the other two to play along as he saw Theo stand up from his heated conversation with Blaise to approach you four.
With sly smiles quickly masked, they leaned in closer to you and feigned curiosity. 
“Alright then,” Ron begins, “But I heard from Hermione that you had another dream last night. Is it as juicy as last time?” 
Harry chimed in, his eyebrows raised suggestively. “Yes, please spill the details. We’re all ears.”
Caught off guard by their sudden and out-of-place interest.  “I said that I’m never telling you of anything again. And it's not juicy! Please don't ever use that word ever again.” You never wanted to divulge anything related to your rather steamy dreams again to your friends. 
“This is the last time, we promise! And we promise to not annoy you any more with Nott.” Hermione exclaims though you reach out to slap her on her arm at how loudly she said it. Looking around the bustling crowd to see if anyone heard it, confused when you see Blaise sitting with somebody else now, probably some friends from Slytherin, Theo nowhere in sight.
Little did she know that Theo had indeed overheard their conversation and as he was slowly nearing their table, curiosity piqued as he heard his name. He slowed in his steps, waiting to hear more.
Your face turned an even deeper shade of crimson as you think back to last night, a bit different— a whole lot different. The dream had left you truly confused because it was nothing like the otherwise steamy ones you had. It was unsettlingly normal, and it has left you with a sense of unease that left you unable to sleep properly, terrified at what this means.
 You cleared your throat, trying to maintain some semblance of composure. "Well, it was just a, you know, like the ones I told you. Nothing too different. I still hate it."
Hermione's eyes sparkled with mischief as she leaned in, feigning innocence. "From the look on your face, it seems to be different. Tell us about it, pretty please."
You hesitated but then began to describe the dream in the most vague and unassuming way possible, but you knew no matter what you said, they would use this to tease you endlessly. "Alright, alright. So, in the dream, I was in the Black Lake, and there was a gentle, warm breeze. I was walking with someone, and it was peaceful. It was like…everything is normal. No war, no problems, no animosity, just us walking like any normal person.”
Harry and Ron exchanged knowing glances, while Hermione continued to prod gently. "And who were you walking with, Y/N?"
Your gaze darted around the table, avoiding eye contact. Not seeing how their eyes slightly shifted behind you. "Well, it was just someone... you know, a dream version of someone I know. Like you don’t know already."
Hermione shook her head, “Yeah but this is different, so it must be somebody else right?”
“Hermione…It’s Theo, who else.” 
"Y/N…" You hear a voice behind you call out in a low tone, with a thread of voice. 
Your eyes widen, filled to the brim with alertness and humiliation. Your mother was right, one day this mouth will get you in trouble— not that it hasn’t been proven countless times before— but now nothing made you want to become more one with the ground than this moment.
You swallow hard and turn around, instantly the mortification in your features becomes tenfold. There it is— the stupid, bloody smirk that is always present on his stupid, pretty face when he has caught you red-handed. 
“Don’t.” You warn.
He leans his entire weight back on the wooden post behind him, staring down at you with a look of satisfaction, unapologetically reveling in your obvious embarrassment.
“Oh, but I must.” He drawls, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
Your frustration surges as you fold your arms, attempting to salvage a shred of dignity in this awkward moment. You give him a glare before turning back front facing to the table.
“You are truly insufferable, you know that?”
Without even being able to see it, you already know that his grin widens at your reply. “Guilty, I’m afraid.”
Theo pushed himself off the wooden post and sauntered closer to where you were sitting, making your heart stutter. The playful glint in his eyes brings forth an image that you would rather not see right now.
"But what's the fun in letting you off the hook so easily? It’s not every day that I find out somebody has been kept awake all night because of me."
You could only continue to cast a withering look at him as you shook your head. "You just love tormenting me, don't you?"
He sits down on the seat next to you, ignoring the other occupants who have reserved to remain quiet. Truly enjoying the show that you, unfortunately, are the star of. He inches closer to you until you can almost feel your eyelashes flutter at his breath.
“Only because I quite enjoy how flustered you can be.” He admits softly, and in that moment the playful teasing in his voice gives way to something else.
A different kind of tension. 
Not one that you would like to be a part of.
“Well, that would be the last of it.” 
Theo and your friends are left bewildered when you suddenly stand and disappear among the group of rowdy students.
His eyebrows furrow and his gleaming expression turns into one of confusion and a hint of hurt and disappointment. “What just happened?”
When he finally turns to look at your friends, all they do is share uneasy glances with each other. They were unsure of how to respond to Theo’s question when they could hardly comprehend what had only occurred.
Hermione opens her mouth to say something but closes it once more when the words in her mind are a jumble.
“Astronomy Tower.” He hears someone say. His cerulean blue eyes that somehow turned grey shifted to the bespectacled boy sitting a chair away from him. “Go.” 
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“Why did you run off?” You ignore the voice that shatters the silence. The bristles of the wind brush against your clothes. Your head thrumming as the sound of your shoes clicking against the concrete permeates into the air. 
He calls you by your name with a gentleness that sends tingles down your spine. But yet again, you ignore him. Choosing to stare intently at the rust that forms by the railing in front of you, the complex chemical reaction is seemingly more interesting to you now. 
“Y/N please…I don't know what’s going on your mind right now but we need to talk.” He moves to stand next to you, placing his arms on the barrier. “I will say it, no matter if you want to listen or not. We clearly have feelings for each other.”
You want to say that you are surprised that he is being so straightforward right now, but it’s evident that someone had to stop whatever dance the both of you had been playing at for the past month already. 
 “And that’s confirmed by what I heard earlier.” He chuckles in an attempt to lighten up the mood. “Gods, I hate you so much.”
“Your dreams say otherwise.” He continues with his teasing.
“Stop it. As if you’re any better with how you acted with Blaise earlier.” You hit him back. “Blaise is an annoying ass who meddles in my business way more often than necessary. But I guess he did one thing right.”
“What?” You ask, turning your body to lean on the railing, facing him.
“He kept bothering me about you, and I guess he got tired and decided to make a move leading us to this moment.” 
“He can be pretty persuasive when he wants to be." You agree. Silence befalling after.
“Gods, I don’t know what happened but it’s you.” He breathes heavily.  
A laugh escapes your chest, “If somebody came to us two months ago and told us that we’d be acting like this, I would think they’re mental.”
Theo grins at you, making you giggle to see the little fang on the corner of his mouth. He places his hands on your cheeks and cradles your face, making a move to press his forehead to yours as he nears.
The vivid, flashing images of Theo from your dreams doesn’t hold a candle to the real thing. The skin under his touch tingled and it made you itch to reach out with your fingertips, feeling as if you would crumble beneath his hands.
You pull away to stare up at him. The cold that typically veils over his eyes are gone as they reciprocate your stare with an even warmer touch. Every nerve ends in you lighting up with a golden electricity.
Theo opened his mouth, closed it again, opened it once more, and then shut it, apparently struggling to remember how to talk.
So, he decided that actions seem to be your thing anyways, as the two of you are quite horrible at talking.
Carefully, almost as if he’s never done it before, Theo leans forward and presses his lips against yours so gently. All you can think about is him even as you respond to his kiss, melting against the touch. 
He pressed himself into you, attempting to tangle your bodies together. He wants to feel every inch of you against his skin, willing the gods to let you be one. Hell, he wanted to climb into your ribcage and possibly live out the rest of his days inside your heart.
You gasp as his hands creep under your shirt and trail along your lower back, though he doesn’t wander. He takes this as an opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth, exploring eagerly.
You tilt forward, answering his devotion with an equal eagerness. In your distraction, your hands slide from their hold on his shirt and travel until your fingertips meet behind his nape.
This goes for a while before a sudden splash from the waters below you makes you jump apart, though still very much physically attached. His arms were still tightly wound around your waist.
“I think that’s a sign we should stop for now.”
“Yeah, definitely.”
Laughter met in the air between you—sweet, short, intertwined. Although you would like to have another one of your dreams to come true, you want to take it slow. The idea that he thought of you as you did to him has still not truly sunk into your mind.
Even now as he leans his face slightly towards yours again and begins to leave soft, tender kisses all over your cheek, making butterflies appear in your stomach.
“Gods, I just realised something.” You laugh all of a sudden, making him stand up straight to look at you curiously. “What is it?”
“I just made Ron win a bet for the first time since we all became friends.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, he was the first person to tease me about these stupid dreams–”
“Excuse me, I rather think it’s not.” He interrupts playfully raising an eyebrow. “Shush.”
“Anyways,” You continue, “Harry and Hermione initially thought it was nothing and that it probably would stop after a while— obviously not. So Ron set a bet that I’ll end up having feelings for you or we’ll end up together.”
He chuckles, his eyes glinting with amusement. “I’m still surprised they didn’t hate the idea. With us being in literal houses that hate each other.”  
“They’re only annoyed at some of you, honestly. The ones that perpetuate the ‘Slytherin’ motto too much.” 
"Plus," he continued, the joking tone in his voice fading a bit, "even if they did have complaints, I would have ignored every single one and still pursued you."
“As if! You stormed to Hogsmeade just to interrupt our ‘date’ and you wouldn’t even admit it. If it weren’t for what our friends did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now.”
“Let me pretend, for goodness’ sake woman!”
His playful exasperation brought a genuine smile to your face, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to fade as you got lost in the playful banter you're used to with him.
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jeonghantis · 11 months
Text
✧ — HEAVEN ANGEL (y.jh)
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PAIRING ⇝ yoon jeonghan x reader.
SUMMARY ⇝
beautiful, everyone had called you. the compliment lost its charm on you, knowing fully well it’s paid only for the surface-level appearance you kept up and nothing else you had to offer. irritating, he had called you. you let him fuck you.
TAGS ⇝ uni!au, fratboy!jeonghan, fwb, smut, a dash of angst (oopsy!).
WARNINGS ⇝ language, fem!reader (she/her), houseparty scene (not exactly detailed), gossip, explicit sexual content (MINORS DNI!), bathroom (mirror) sex, unrequited crush (or is it?), reader has commitment issues, reader is kinda mean, mentions of p*ss and sh*t but not in a sexual manner, just for jokes.
WORD COUNT ⇝ 4.1k words.
note: funnily enough, i had two requests specifically for house party sex with yoon jeonghan. i lost the ask for them both (accidentally deleted while my laptop glitched). i am insane. and before anyone asks, yes there'll be a part two/prequel :) and also this is somewhat connected to my upcoming cheol fic. so i hope you stay tuned! proofread by the star of my life @cheolhub. sar fr put up with every version and my constant anxiety over every paragraph. i couldn't have done it without them. i love u so much. @szakias was also helpful in keeping me sane as i wrote this out 🙇 i love u so bad. loosely based on the song heaven angel by the driver era. don't think it'd go with the fic but you know :)
reblogs & comments are very much appreciated.
explicit tags under the cut.
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EXPLICIT TAGS ⇝ semi-public setting (bathroom sex while there's a party), unprotected sex, dom/sub dynamics, mean dom!jeonghan, sub!reader, dumbification, teasing, petnames (angel), degradation (whore, bitch), dacryphilia, marking, briefest thigh-fucking, clit stimulation, cumming inside, squirting, light overstimulation, (a little) aftercare.
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A strange rumor went around the campus. A rumor of a person whose beauty was so out of this world that it was terrifying. 
Unreal. Everyone had said. You won’t be able to look her in the eyes! 
But beyond that angelic beauty was a personality so sour, no one dared thought to approach her. Those that tried their luck had it beaten right out of them and they came to hate her to hide their broken hearts.
What a bitch, they had said. Does she think she’s all that?
Yoon Jeonghan, for one, thought they were being overly dramatic. It was a strange and interesting phenomenon how gossip can evolve to add in such theatrics. It was like living in one of those regency novels his sister owned which he had perused over on one particularly boring day. Had these people really had nothing better to do with their lives? Were they trying to live in a novel of their own? Jeonghan never understood them, neither cared for these kinds of things. He’d much rather form his opinions. He had better things to do than to dabble in such frivolity. 
What a stuck-up, one would say. What better things could Jeonghan be doing that puts him above everyone else? 
Oh, fucking the subject of the rumors of course. 
“How irritating,” Jeonghan sighed, abruptly ceasing his thrusts inside you to harshly yank you back by your hair. 
You yelp, a deer in the headlights, when your neck is forcibly craned back, made to look up at his looming figure. You looked pathetic from where you were pinned against the wall, exposed breasts pressed flush against the cool tiles and your mini skirt flipped upwards to reveal the swell of your bare ass flattened against his hip bone.
“I said to keep your voice down,” he tuts. “Do you want the whole house to hear you?” 
“I’m s-sorry,” you stammer out, throat raw and chest heaving. 
“Are you?” He mused with a raised brow, mocking and unbelieving. 
You couldn’t meet his gaze, or at least you tried to. Jeonghan liked to make eye contact, he once told you, for he loved to see your sanity visibly ebb away from your eyes, leaving you a mindless, glassy-eyed whore. You had not reached that stage, not yet, not when some semblance of your being remained clear in your gaze, dilated pupils fearfully wavering back and forth between his simpering face and the bathroom door where a rather large, booming frat party laid beyond.
He cocked his head to the side and tightened his grip on your hair, forcing your eyes back on him. He leaned forward until he’s breathing your air, and all you could do is stare up at him pitifully with quivering lips. “Or…” he starts, his lips twisting cruelly. “Do you want them to hear you? Want them hear how good you’re being fucked right now?”
You remain silent, the lump on your throat bobbing as you swallow hard. But your walls tighten around him and Jeonghan couldn’t help the curve of his lips.
“You’re really weird, you know that?” Jeonghan sighed, releasing his hold on you. A lithe finger curls a lock behind your ear, the gesture jarringly affectionate from his prior cruelty, before his mouth moves to hover over it, his warm breath tickling. “You moan loudly when I tell you to shut up. You shut up when I ask you questions. Have I fucked you stupid already? Or have you always been stupid?”
You let out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry.”
“Is that all you know what to say?” Jeonghan laughs. “A renowned bitch, known to reject her admirers without so much of a second thought, now reduced into this pathetic bitch in heat. What would everyone else think, hm?”
His derogatory spats clamored down to your bones, making you shake with emotions that you couldn’t quite place with your hazed mind. At one point, with the last bit of pride you had left, you’re irritated, and it’s shown in the twitch of your eye and narrowed gaze. Then there’s embarrassment, shown by how your face warms and flushes. There was no denying how fucking dazed and desperate you had been, that much was true, and the demeaning tone of his voice did its job of filling you with shame. The twisted part of it all is that you enjoyed every minute of this ridicule thanks to pure, carnal desire. You couldn’t care less about what other people would say about you, what matters now is when the fuck would Jeonghan move his dick inside you. 
But Jeonghan being Jeonghan, he wanted his answers. His last question was rhetoric. You knew. He knew. And yet he looks down at you with cruel expectancy masked in the sweetest, angelic smile that has fooled so many, and had once fooled you. 
“I-I don’t care,” you say, deciding to be honest. “Who the fuck cares what they think?”
“Oh, but I’d like to know,” Jeonghan said. He hums for a moment, looking you over in consideration, before speaking again. “But you’re right. They don’t matter right now, do they?” 
You release a breath you hadn’t known you were holding.
And Jeonghan watched, amused. He wasn’t done speaking. “But I’d at least like to know what you think.”
You blinked. “What?”
Before you could question him some more, Jeonghan pulls out of you, leaving your weeping cunt fluttering around nothing. You cry out, high and broken, from having pleasure ripped away with such cruelty. Jeonghan ignores it and his own throbbing problem as he goes to peel you off the wall with a rough tug on your arm. He has you by over the sink, has you staring at yourself through the vanity mirror. Jeonghan casts a smile at you through the reflection, his gaze weighted as he drinks in the sight of you as well.
Jeonghan had to admit, the rumors weren’t all baseless. You were stunningly beautiful, there was no denying that when anyone with functioning eyes could see it. The way you carried yourself tells him you’re well aware of it too. You held confidence with a raised chin, an allure with your own posture and stance even in this vulnerable position you were forced in, looking as disheveled as you are with tufts of your hair sticking out in every direction, framing your flushed face. Your blouse had been carefully unbuttoned despite how desperately urgent you both had been for each other the moment the bathroom door shut closed, but the rush was evident in how your bralette had been roughly tugged down enough for your perked breasts to spill over. Jeonghan had been anything but kind to your skin, having left angry red splotches blossoming all over your chest; you weren’t either on his, knowing if Jeonghan had craned his neck enough from behind you, they’d find similar markings on his throat, though considerably less in quantity.
Jeonghan also looked considerably less damning. He had not made moves to remove any of his upper clothing and so he remained presentable with his black varsity over a loose white shirt. Even his long hair had not looked loosened from where it’s tied up. But below, away from the mirror’s sight, his dark jeans had been unbuttoned and unzipped for his curved dick to spring out freely, for it now to rub over your ass teasingly.
“So?” Jeonghan asks. “What do you think of yourself?”
You glare at him through the mirror. “Fucking awful.”
“Of course you’d see it that way,” he laughs, resting his chin on your shoulder. “For me, I think this is the most beautiful you’ve ever been.”
It’s your turn to look unbelieving, but your pulse rouses. 
Jeonghan grinned. “Ask me why.”
You reluctantly indulge him, “Why?”
“Because you finally look fucking awful,” Jeonghan said cheerfully. You turn to glower at him but stop when he lifts a hand to trace a line over your chest, mapping out the marks adorning you with a nimble finger. “And because I’m the reason for it.”
“A little vain, don’t you think?” You remark, albeit breathily, your face heated.
“I can be proud of my work,” he quipped, pressing his smile against your skin. He looks you over once more, taking in every detail down to the last freckle, and something deep in him thrums sweetly. “And I had a beautiful canvas to begin with.”
“How charming,” you sighed, derisive, as you threw your head back against his shoulder so you could look at him with batting lashes. “Can you fuck me now?”
“But I mean it,” Jeonghan murmured and relented, reaching around you so he could press a roughened finger over your swollen clit.
 “Mean what?” You ask, but you’re barely listening, not when your focus is narrowed to the deft circles he’s making on your sweet nerves.
Jeonghan guides his length between your thighs, letting it glide languidly right under your weeping and throbbing cunt at a lazy pace. His lips are still curled, his eyes bright when he gazes down at you before he’s responding, “You’re absolutely beautiful.”
Sincerity was not something you’re used to when it came to the ever sarcastic Yoon Jeonghan, and yet here it was, bleeding into his tone in its purest form. Never in the entire three months of sleeping with him had he ever complimented the way he had just now, and if he had uttered any, it was quickly followed with ridicule or said with ridicule.
Good, he called you when you were obedient.
Cute, he called you when you were crying.
Beautiful. It was new. From him at least. 
It was a temporary moment of clarity in your lust-addled head as you blink at him, making sense of what he had said, making sense of the warmth that starts to bloom throughout your chest. And temporary it remained as Jeonghan led his cockhead right back to your entrance, pushing himself in without so much of a warning, and the bare grasp you had on lucidity loosened.
You gasp out loudly, doubling over the bathroom counter as your walls tense and quiver painfully from the sudden breach, but still yield around him nonetheless. Jeonghan was quick to catch you, to force you right back up with his long fingers encircling your throat. 
“Again?” Jeonghan barked out a laugh but it’s hoarse. “You really want everyone to hear you.”
“I c-can’t help it,” you whined, your head resting weakly against his shoulder, warm breath puffing over his marred skin. 
Jeonghan looked unimpressed. “Well, help it.”
“Oh, fuck!” you cry out when he starts driving into you with no sense of leniency, your body thrown fully forward and voice shaking from the repeated impact that clatters your bones.
“You’re horrible at this,” he cackled. He grips at your hips this time, pulling you hard against him, balls slapping heavily against your ass. He's practically pulling and pushing your cunt onto his cock as if you weighed nothing, as if you were nothing but a cocksleeve for him to enjoy. Each decadent slide of his length in your heat draws out breathy grunts from him, his head drunk with pleasure.
You weren’t faring any better. Your head is thrown back to reveal flushed skin stained with tears that drip from closed eyes as you try desperately to hold yourself up with palms flat against the cold marble counter. There was nothing else for you to do but feel it, feel his cock stretch your pussy, its silken insides practically making way for him with each piston that has you crying out more in volume and pitch.
“Open your eyes.” His hot, staggered breath wafted over your ear. His thrusts ease its pace, slowing into something more languorous and teasing. “Open your eyes and look at me.”
You whine but your eyelids flutter open. Glassy, unfocused eyes find Jeonghan.
A devious smile splinters across his face. 
There you are.
“Please,” you whimper, your hand reaching to paw at his nape. 
“What is it, angel?” His tone is sweet but it rolls off his tongue sharply. “I n-need - ”
Jeonghan laughed cruelly. “I don’t think you’re in the position to demand something from me when you can’t even listen to my one demand.”
You grab at the ends of his hair and rock your hips back into him, fucking your cunt right on his dick in a faster, but struggling, rhythm. 
“Hannie,” you mewl. “You feel too good. Please, please, just fuck me. I can’t help it, I just - Please? I’ll b-be good. Just please fuck me, Hannie.”
Jeonghan doesn’t respond right away to your pleas, allowing himself to revel in the broken desperation you display with an amused smile and delighted throbs made inside your velvety walls. Perhaps Jeonghan should be used to this sight now. He’s seen you in much messier and miserable states, ruined you far worse than he had now. And yet he’s plenty invigorated than he’s ever been, pure excitement searing his veins.
What would everyone else think, hm?
Jeonghan thought it was rhetoric. Jeonghan said it didn’t matter. 
It wasn’t. It did. 
“I don’t think you can be good,” he began as a hand inches forward between your legs, “But if you’re going to be loud, then at least use my name. That way, everyone will know who’s fucking you so good.”
“H-Hannie!” You mewl, oh so pitchy, as your frame jerks from the brush of the roughened pads of his fingers on your clit, pleasure flickering up your abdomen so wildly that you could not easily bear through it. 
“There we go,” he crooned, pride gleaming in his eyes. Jeonghan was much too familiar with your body by now, so it’s easy when his hips brings back its pace, fucking at your insides at an angle so the length of him glides over your sweet nerves with each impact. 
“Yes, yes, yes,” you sob out like a mantra, spreading your legs a little wider to accommodate his brutality, your channel tightening around his throbbing girth. “Ngh, Jeonghan, right there! Oh my god - !”
The nectar that leaks out of you coated his shaft with an amazingly significant amount that makes the slides so much easier and louder, the wet noises bouncing off the four walls and meshing with your own cries of his name like he wanted. It was almost enough to drown out the muffled music of the party that seemed many worlds away now.
Jeonghan soon enough joined in this sinful chorus, letting out panted moans of his own. Some were incoherent but when it wasn’t, it was mostly your name, just in case everyone couldn’t tell who was screaming his name like a wailing prayer. How he’s managed to keep himself restrained and sane for this long was a strong feat in itself. Your everything put him in a trance, every touch of you—nails, fingers, and obviously your tight cunt, was a little too much, it was dizzying. 
Even at your seemingly waning state, your hips somehow finds itself moving back against him, undulating with the same force and rhythm. You’re driven by the tightness both in your chest and in your abdomen, white flashing across your vision the more you keep up your pace, your moan becoming more muddled as your thoughts were. And when balance fails you, having you bow back down and lean all your weight on your forearm, Jeonghan inclines with you, his chest pressed right against your back and you could feel his raging heartbeat that very well matched your own.
“How are you holding up, angel?” He chuckled and pressed his face against your neck, his breathing hard and warm on your skin, as his thrusts become more shallow. “Doing okay?”
“I-I’m close,” you whimper. “Please, Hannie - ”
“I’ve got you,” he whispered back as nails dig crescents on your waist, muscles flexing as the intensity of his strokes inside you extends once again and remains at the same tempo. He doesn’t know what came over him the next moment, his senses just completely overtaken and all he could do was be at awe at all this perfect bliss you’re bringing him, and only him. “You’re mine tonight,” he breathed. “I’m going to fucking ruin you for everyone, angel, you understand that? You’re mine.”
There it was again. The clarity. The warmth. It all happened in a single moment.
You turn your head and stare up at him. Jeonghan stared right back at you. A completely indecipherable expression confronts another.  
Where it had been temporary then, it intensified now. Where there had been questions, suspicions took its place. 
Then came fear.
Jeonghan catches a glimpse of it in your eyes and for the very first time, his stomach sank at the sight of it. 
But his facade is flawless. It comes too naturally before he’s fully aware—a sweet curl of lip, the faintest crinkle at the corners of his eyes. He’s fooled too many. He could fool you again. 
Jeonghan takes advantage of your moment of daze to toy once again with your clit, and is relieved at how immediate your body reacts. 
“Ngh, J-Jeonghan!” You keen high as you reach a hand to cup over to where his fingers flicks and pinches at the delicate bud, pressing down on him for added pressure to alleviate your own self. Oh, how embarrassingly easy it was for your thoughts to be completely overwritten by your own lustful desires, but as you have learned, it always prevails, doesn’t it? 
Your thighs seize up from the overwhelming pleasure crawling up your spine; while your rhythm falters from it, Jeonghan’s is relentless even when his own breathing turned ragged and his body strained from the effort. It all becomes so much so fast; the feverish heat spreads under your skin, tightening up coils in your abdomen, but your frame is trembling, as if a chill settled so deeply into your bones. 
“Hannie, Hannie, I’m going to -”
“I know,” Jeonghan grunts as his face falls in the juncture of your neck, lips pressed right over your pulse point. He can feel your walls start to restrict around his twitching girth, and it did little to aid his own self-control. “Let go for me, angel. C’mon. Let me hear you. Let them hear you.”
And you do. With the most shrilling wail, you come, your warm release spilling onto his cock and, much to your surprise, squirting onto themselves, their clothes, and his hand. 
“Holy shit,” Jeonghan marveled under his breath. If he could burn a memory into his brain, this would be fucking it. Just you shivering and quivering around his dick. Your back prettily arched back with tits hardened and perked. The fluids spurting all over yourself and him so shamelessly and so intensely until you're convulsing back down on your front from it all. 
Watching this whole brilliance of you, just reminded Jeonghan of how lucky he truly was to have you like this, to be able to make you this fucked out with crossed eyes, pupils blown wide out of proportion. Hidden concerns were washed away by this single glance, replaced with nothing but gratitude, pride, and true bliss. And with all that and a poorly thrown out warning, he’s thrown over the edge. A moan is punched out of his gut as he’s releasing inside you with one last valiant thrust, his cum white and hot as it spurts and paints your walls.
And poor you having to tolerate this continued abuse of your insides that pushes you close into the sphere of overstimulation. You’re spent, fatigue already ebbing into your consciousness, but you stay still for him, letting him use you for all your worth until the last few twitches of cock, until the last few spews of his cum is fucked back into you.
For the next few moments, only a dulled bass fills the air as two heaving bodies try to steady themselves. When the remnants of carnality wane, Jeonghan finally pulls out of you, your channel left with nothing but their shared release dripping out of you, beading down your legs. There’s a crack of a smile thrown your way through the reflection just as you feel a light tap made over your cunt. You resist the urge to roll your eyes at the gesture. And to rock back into it.
“If I clean you up,” Jeonghan began, eyeing the puddle on the floor, “could you help me with the rest of your mess?”
Now you did roll your eyes. “Ever the gentleman.”
“Hey, I just thought I should ask. It’s a lot.” 
Your face warmed up. “Forget it, I’ll clean myself up. You clean the floor.” You move to lift yourself up from the counter, but catch yourself as your muscles start to strain, limbs shaking. 
Jeonghan raised a brow.
You winced. “Can you help me over to the toilet?”
 “Need to piss it all out again?” He jests and takes a hold of your arm to gently pick you up. 
You sneered. “That wasn’t piss, asshat.”
Jeonghan laughed. “I know it wasn’t. But it was hot as hell.”
“Shut the hell up.”
That only made him laugh again.
Then came a knock, a very aggressive one.
“Yoon Jeonghan, are you done fucking in there?” Said a male voice beyond the door, sounding just as irritated as his knock was. 
“Ah, damn,” Jeonghan muttered quietly to himself, then raised his voice at the door, “There are other bathrooms, Cheol!”
Choi Seungcheol, you now recognized Jeonghan’s fellow frat brother, responded right away. “All occupied! Can you hurry your shit up?”
“No!” said Jeonghan, but he’s quick to guide you over next to the toilet with an arm now encircling your waist; you tell yourself this was just a helpful gesture, but there’s no helping how your skin heats up under his touch. From where you stand leaning against the wall, you watch him rush around the bathroom, first cleaning himself up and shoving his dick back in his jeans before he throws a clean towel down on the floor to soak up your mess.
“I’ll leave first,” Jeonghan explained as he sauntered back to you with soap and another fresh towel in hand, setting them down where it’s within your reach. “I’ll appease Cheol first and buy you some time to clean up.”
“Is he always so impatient?” You asked.
“Always,” he sighed, “but once I explain, he’ll understand. I don’t know why he’s fussier than usual though.” 
“Maybe he needs to shit.”
“Shitting at a party? That’s disgusting of him.”
“He has no respect for the partygoers out there.”
You exchange grins with each other. 
Then another round of knocking came around.
“In a minute!” Jeonghan called back, trying to sound calm but his face was scowling. He lowers his voice when he speaks to you again, “Are you sure you don’t want any help? Now I just want to make him wait.”
“Go,” you tell him and wave him off. “He sounds like he’s about to kick the door open. I’d rather not have that.”
Jeonghan huffed a laugh at that. “I wouldn’t put it past him.”
Jeonghan turned to leave. Your heart lurched from your chest.
“Jeonghan?” You call out before you could stop yourself.
He looked back. “Hm?”
“Do we…” You didn’t know what to say, how to phrase it. “Should we talk about it?”
It was miniscule, but you caught his wince. “Talk about what?”
“About what you said?”
“Angel, I said a lot of things.”
“Don’t play stupid with me. You said - ”
Another loud knock, quickly followed by Seungcheol yelling. “Jeonghan! Hurry up!”
Jeonghan let out another sigh, a mix of annoyance with a tinge of relief. “We’ll have to talk about it another time.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Jeonghan - ”
“We will talk about it,” he said firmly, his tone spoke of sincerity, but his face said otherwise. “Just not now. Not yet.” 
You gave him a skeptical look. 
He tried for a smile, perfectly saccharine. You saw right through it.
“Fine,” you relented.
Jeonghan gave you a grateful nod of his head and made a move to leave again. You watch again with the strangest restriction in your chest.
“Cheol, you have got to learn patience,” Jeonghan said once he cracked the door open.
“And you have got to learn to be quiet,” the disembodied voice of Seungcheol parried back. “I’m sure the people passing the hallway could hear you both.”
“Well, we were trying to get the whole house to hear us.” Jeonghan spared a quick glance your way and grinned. You wanted to punch his teeth in.
Seungcheol groaned. “Of course you fucking were.”
Jeonghan laughed and finally stepped out of the bathroom. “At least I’m getting my dick wet. You haven’t been with anyone since - Oh, I spoke too soon. Cheol, you sneaky son of a - ”
The door shut closed behind him, leaving you all alone, and you buried your face in your hands.
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© jeonghantis. all rights reserved. do not re-publish, translate, plagiarise, edit any of my work on any other platform.
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psychedelic-ink · 2 months
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ㅤㅤㅤ✦ 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐘
ㅤㅤjoel miller x plus size!f!reader
genre: romance, flowershop au, jackson era, minors dni
word count: 7k
summary: you own a small flower shop in Jackson, when Ellie comes to visit, your life inevitably becomes tangled with the man who cares for her; joel miller.
warnings: age gap, piv in the middle of a flower field, no one sees, praise kink, some angst because joel, oral (fem receiving)
a/n: hello everyone! it's been a while and honestly, life has been kicking me in the gut lately with everything its got.
This originally was a commission, reader had a name and I've been working at it for months but sadly the person who commissioned be backed out last second saying they weren't interested anymore meaning I'm not getting paid for this work. Again, it's on me. Admittedly I've been slow on commissions due to my living situation and work and I should've taken half the payment upfront but trusting it was a joel fic I didn't really take extra precautions.
I decided to share it anyway, and the person who commissioned me said that I could. Any kind of writing has been hard for me to do lately and I really like how this one turned out. But since now I'm not getting paid for this work I decided to take out readers name and make some changes to the overall plot that I was given.
Sadly, I can't take any more commissions at the moment before finishing the ones I have left, but I'd be grateful for any kind of support you guys can give. I need to move out this summer (if I don't, I don't have a shadow of a doubt that my aunts will tell me to leave anyway) and I've been trying to save up as much as I can. Everything just has been a lot lately and I'm feeling anxious about my decisions and lost.
Again, any kind of support is greatly appreciated even tho I know I don't deserve it at this time:
my kofi
**dividers by @saradika-graphics 💜
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You unlock the door to your quaint flower shop, the antique bell that you found and Tommy fixed chiming softly in greeting. Stepping outside, you're immediately embraced by the warmth of the morning sun, its golden rays dancing playfully on your skin. The air carries the unmistakable scent of spring, a delicate blend of fresh blossoms and earthy notes that fills your lungs with every inhale.
Dressed in a flowing dress, you feel perfectly in tune with the season as you begin arranging the colorful array of flowers on display outside your shop. The fabric of your dress sways gently in the breeze, a soft symphony of movement that mirrors the graceful dance of the petals.
Taking a deep breath, you close your eyes and tilt your face towards the sky, basking in the gentle caress of the sun's rays. Above you, the cerulean expanse is dotted with fluffy white clouds, their shapes shifting and morphing with each passing moment.
With practiced hands, you arrange the blooms with care, each stem finding its place in the intricate tapestry of colors and textures. The vibrant hues of the flowers contrast beautifully against the backdrop of the weathered brick walls of your shop, creating a scene that's both inviting and enchanting.
As you work, you can't help but smile at the thought of the joy these flowers will bring to those who pass by. It’s been hard adopting to a new and broken world, but ironically, you have found your passion. Something to make you eager to get up in the morning. Of course your heart still ached for those you had lost, the suffering, but working on flowers, something living and growing and adapting just like you managed to lighten the weight on your heart. Whether it's a simple bouquet to brighten someone's day or a thoughtful arrangement for a special occasion, your creations have a way of spreading happiness and light wherever they go.
With the last of the flowers arranged to perfection, you step back to admire your handiwork, a sense of pride swelling within you. With a contented sigh, you turn to head back inside, ready to greet the day with open arms and a heart full of gratitude.
That is, until, you hear a surprised gasp. 
“Holy shit—” 
Turning around at the sound, you're met with the sight of a familiar face. A young girl you've seen around town quite frequently. You haven’t officially met her yet, but you know her name: Ellie. 
Realizing that the young girl has never visited your flower shop before, you understand the source of her surprise. With a warm smile, you approach her and greet her by name. "You're Ellie, right? Tommy's niece?"
Ellie nods enthusiastically, her eyes bright with excitement. "Yeah, that's me! Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I've just never been here before. The flowers are... fucking amazing—"
She suddenly claps a hand over her mouth, looking towards you apologetically. The gesture makes you laugh.
"I'm glad you like them," you reply, feeling a sense of satisfaction at her reaction. "Feel free to take a closer look if you'd like."
Her eyes light up at the invitation, and she eagerly follows you inside the cozy flower shop. The atmosphere inside is warm and inviting, with shelves lined with potted plants and bouquets of flowers in various stages of bloom. Sunlight filters through the windows, casting a soft glow over the space and illuminating the vibrant colors of the blooms.
As you lead Ellie further into the shop, you can't help but notice the curious glances she casts around, taking in every detail with a sense of wonder. The air is filled with the subtle fragrance of flowers, a delicate scent that lingers in the air and adds to the charm of the space.
"So, Ellie," you begin, breaking the comfortable silence as you approach a display of freshly cut flowers, "Anything you like? I’d be more than happy to gift you some."
Ellie's eyes sparkle with excitement as she looks around the shop. "Really? But there’s so many, how can I even choose?"
"Well, you're in luck," you reply, gesturing towards the colorful blooms around you. "I can just make you a bouquet of everything. Just pick out your favorites."
Ellie's gaze drifts over the display, her expression thoughtful as she considers your question. "Hmm, that's a tough one, they all look so fucking cool," she muses, her brows furrowing slightly in concentration. "How about sunflowers and. . . daisies? There's just something about them that feels... I don't know, hopeful, I guess."
You nod in understanding, a fond smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Sunflowers are a wonderful choice. They symbolize warmth, happiness, and positivity. Definitely a fitting choice for someone as vibrant as you, Ellie."
She grins at the compliment, "Thanks,. So, what about you? Do you have a favorite flower?"
“That’s a tough one, but I’d had to say daffodils. They just make me feel right at home. . . even though home has become a difficult word.” 
She doesn’t answer you, at least not in a way that you would expect. She nods and says,
"Let's add some daffodils to the mix too. If that’s okay.”
“If course it is. I said any flower didn’t I?”
With Ellie's choices in mind, you set to work gathering the blooms she selected, expertly arranging them into a vibrant bouquet. Your hands move with practiced precision, the gentle rustle of petals and stems filling the air as you weave the different flowers together.
Each blossom is a work of art in its own right, vibrant hues mingling together in a harmonious dance of colors and textures. Sunflowers, with their golden petals reaching towards the sky, stand tall and proud at the center of the bouquet, symbolizing warmth and happiness. Daisies, with their delicate white petals and cheerful yellow centers, add a touch of innocence and purity to the mix. And finally, the daffodils.
Beside you, Ellie watches with rapt attention, her eyes shining, "It's so pretty," she remarks, her voice filled with awe.
You smile at her words, feeling a sense of pride swell within you at the sight of her delight. "Flowers have a way of bringing joy and beauty into our lives," you reply, your voice soft with reverence. "They remind us to appreciate the simple things and to find beauty in the world around us."
Finally, the bouquet is complete, a stunning masterpiece that radiates warmth and joy. You present it to Ellie with a flourish, a sense of satisfaction washing over you at the sight of her delighted expression.
"It's perfect," Ellie exclaims, her eyes shining with excitement as she admires the bouquet in her hands. "Thank you so much. This is amazing."
"It was my pleasure," you reply, your heart swelling with happiness at her words. "I'm glad you like it. And remember, if you ever want to learn more about flowers or need some help with anything, you know where to find me."
Ellie nods eagerly, her enthusiasm infectious. "Definitely. Thanks again. This means a lot."
As Ellie turns to leave, a sudden thought seems to strike her. She pauses, her hand on the door, before turning back to face you with a mischievous glint in her eye.
"Hey," she begins, a playful smile dancing on her lips, "do you need a flower assistant? I mean, I’d be nice to work here, and you seem really cool."
"Well, Ellie," you reply with a teasing grin, "If you're serious about helping out around here, I'd be more than happy to have you on board."
Ellie's eyes widen,. "Wait, really?" she asks, her voice tinged with disbelief. "You mean it?"
You nod, your smile genuine as you reassure her. "Of course. I could use all the help I can get, especially during busy times. And besides, it'll be fun having you around. Consider yourself officially hired as my flower assistant, Ellie."
A grin spreads across Ellie's face, her eyes sparkling with excitement at the prospect of working alongside you in the flower shop. "Wow, I don't even know what to say," she admits, her voice filled with genuine gratitude. 
"No need to say anything," you grin. "Just don’t be late."
As Ellie nods, a sense of anticipation fills the air, signaling the beginning of a new chapter in both of your lives. With a shared sense of excitement and determination, you and Ellie set to work, ready to take on whatever challenges and adventures the future may hold for your blossoming partnership.
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The next day unfolds with a golden hue, promising another beautiful day in Jackson. As you prepare for the day ahead, a sense of excitement tingles in the air knowing that you'll be mentoring Ellie, your newfound flower assistant. Ellie arrives earlier than you expected, her eyes oozing with sleep.
"Good morning, Ellie," you greet her with a warm smile, gesturing for her to come closer. "Ready for your first day?"
Ellie grins back, nodding enthusiastically. "Absolutely. I’m just not used to waking up so early."
With a chuckle, you lead her to the work table, where several potted plants await repotting. However, before diving into the day's tasks, Ellie's curiosity gets the better of her.
"How do you find all these flowers?" she asks. "I mean, with the infected and everything, it must be hard."
"I have a few spots outside of Jackson where I like to go to collect flowers. There's a field not too far from here that's brimming with all sorts of blooms."
Ellie's eyes widen and you can tell she's intrigued by the idea of venturing beyond the safety of the town's walls. "That sounds amazing," she breathes, her voice filled with wonder. "Do you go there often?"
You nod, a fond smile playing on your lips as you recall the countless trips you've taken to the flower field. "Yes, whenever I need to restock or find something special," you reply. "But I've also started growing some flowers myself. It's a work in progress, but it's been rewarding to see them bloom."
"That's so cool," she exclaims. "I'd love to see the field sometime, if you're up for it."
With a grin, you nod, "I'd be happy to take you," you reply. "But for now, let's focus on getting these plants repotted. We'll save the field trip for another day."
As if on cue, the shop door swings open, and a customer steps inside, a worn backpack slung over their shoulder. They approach the counter with a friendly smile, their eyes scanning the colorful array of blooms on display.
"Good morning," you greet them with a smile, your attention shifting to the customer. "How can I help you today?"
The customer returns your smile, reaching into their backpack to retrieve a small item wrapped in cloth. "I have something to trade," they explain, placing the item on the counter before you.
You unwrap the cloth to reveal a delicate piece of jewelry, a handmade necklace adorned with intricate beads and charms. It's a beautiful piece, clearly crafted with care and attention to detail.
Ellie watches with interest as you examine the necklace, her curiosity piqued by the exchange taking place before her eyes. "What are you trading for?" she asks, her voice filled with curiosity.
You glance at Ellie with a smile, impressed by her keen observation. "Well, Ellie, sometimes customers trade items in exchange for flowers," you explain, turning back to the customer. "It's a way for them to get something they need while also supporting the shop. As for how I decide what the flowers are worth, it's based on a few factors—like the rarity of the flowers, the time and effort it took to grow them, and of course, their beauty."
With a nod, you accept the necklace, carefully placing it aside before selecting a beautiful bouquet of flowers to offer in exchange. As the customer leaves the shop, their smile brighter than before, you can't help but feel a sense of satisfaction knowing that you've made another person's day a little bit brighter.
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“Ellie, I’m not sure me bargin’ into your new workplace is the best introduction,” Joel says.
“You’ll be fine,” she says, dragging Joel by the arm. “Besides, weren’t you the one grumbling about not liking me spending all my time with a stranger? What else was I fucking supposed to do?”
Joel lets out an elongated sigh. “Language.”
He can’t see it, but he knows she’s rolling her eyes at him. The tiny, rundown flower shop soon comes into view and Joel can’t help but think of all the improvements he could make: the crooked step, the splintered door, the moss growing from the bottom of the woody exterior—
This shop won’t last next winter, he thinks with furrowed brows. And even though he’s been skeptical about Ellie spending all of her time here, he’s seen the improvement in her mood. Things just haven’t been the same since their return from the hospital, he couldn’t shake the distant feeling between him and her no matter how hard he tried. It had become something even he couldn’t fix.
But then, one day, she’d come home with the most beautiful bouquet of flowers he’d ever seen, with a wide smile plastered across her young face. Then she mentioned the keeper of the shop. Ever since then, his interest had been piqued.
Approaching the shop, he notices a figure outside arranging flowers, your silhouette bathed in the warm morning sun. You appear younger than he anticipated, your beauty catching him off guard. The way your dress contours your curves adds to your allure, a sight unexpected yet captivating. A gentle breeze tousles your hair as you work, momentarily leaving him speechless.
Contrasting his hesitation, you bound up to the shop with your usual cheerfulness. "Hey there!" Ellie calls out. The woman turns at her greeting, a genuine smile gracing her lips as she sets down the flowers. "Good morning!" 
He hangs back, observing as Ellie effortlessly initiates a conversation with you. Your interaction flows with ease, suggesting a familiarity beyond your brief acquaintance.
While you chat, an unsettling feeling settles within him. There's an inexplicable pull towards the shop owner, despite his attempts to resist. Watching Ellie interact with you stirs a strange longing within him, leaving him more unsettled than before.
Before he can dwell on his thoughts further, Ellie snaps him out of it. "Joel, don’t be a stranger! Introduce yourself, she's the one I've been telling you about."
With a sigh, he steps forward, his approach cautious. As your eyes meet, a peculiar sense of recognition passes between you, as if you've crossed paths in another life.
"Hi," he manages to say, his voice gruff yet not devoid of warmth. "I'm Joel."
As he clasps your hand, a spark ignites between you, a connection unfurling with each passing moment.
“Joel?” you say slowly, as if tasting his name in your mouth. “Joel as in Tommy Miller’s brother?”
Your hand feels soft and delicate as it clasps his own, and he can't help but notice the subtle tremor in your fingers. It's a small detail, but it speaks volumes, hinting at a vulnerability that he hadn't expected from this beautiful stranger.
"Yeah, that's me," he responds with a nod, offering a friendly smile in return. "Tommy's my brother."
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Joel. Ellie speaks very highly of you."
As you exchange pleasantries, he finds himself drawn to the warmth in your gaze, a warmth that seems to seep into his very soul. There's an openness about you, a genuineness that he finds both refreshing and disarming.
While you talk, he can't help but be captivated by the way your lips move, the gentle cadence of your voice. It's a strange sensation, this sudden fascination with a woman he's just met, but he finds himself unable to look away.
Your conversation is interrupted by Ellie's playful interruption, and he reluctantly tears his gaze away from you, feeling a pang of disappointment at the thought of leaving your side. But as they follow Ellie into the shop, he can't shake the feeling that meeting you has stirred something within him, something that he can't quite articulate.
Entering the shop, he can't help but notice even more things wrong– the creaky floorboards, the peeling paint, the flickering lights overhead. It's evident that the place is in dire need of renovations.
Despite the less-than-ideal surroundings, Ellie's excitement is contagious, and he finds himself getting swept up in the moment. She points out various flowers, their vibrant hues and delicate petals bringing a welcome burst of color to the dreary environment.
"These lilies are my absolute favorite," Ellie exclaims, thrusting a handful of flowers towards him with a mischievous grin.
He can't suppress a surprised sneeze as the pollen tickles his nose, and they both dissolve into laughter,and momentarily, all his concerns seem to fade away.
But just as they're catching their breath, you enter the room, your presence once again capturing his attention. There's something about you that intrigues him, a warmth and kindness that draws him in effortlessly.
A sheepish smile spreads across his face as your eyes meet. You return the smile, your gaze gentle and understanding, and for a fleeting moment, it feels as though you're the only two people in the room.
“Who helped you fix the place up?” Joel asks you as Ellie runs off to change the water of the vases. “
"Tommy actually," you explain. "He's been a tremendous help, especially with all the repairs."
Joel’s brows knit together and he ignores the way your smile falters as he speaks, “Well, leave it to my brother to do a shit job. This shop won’t last next winter.”
“O–Oh. . .” you hug yourself, thumbs moving along the contours of your arms. His heart sinks in, leave it to him to make someone feel bad.
“Not to say it can’t be fixed,” he continues abruptly. “I can help you out. Wouldn’t want Ellie’s new favorite spot to get buried under the snow.”
“Really?” you gasp, smile returning. “You would do that?”
“‘Course. Why wouldn’t I?”
“I just. . . I just wasn’t expecting such an offer thank you. It means the world to me.”
Suddenly Joel feels stiff from how deeply you stare at him, and then he realizes how close they are, only a breath away between their lips. He turns his head, grunting, “Don’t mention it,” a stuttered breath leaves him. “Really. Don’t.”
Your growing smile surprises him, as does your not backing away.
“You got it, Mr. Miller.”
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Watching Joel work on fixing the roof of the shop, you can't help but feel a flutter of warmth stir within you. His muscles ripple with each movement, his arms bulging with strength as he lifts heavy beams and hammers nails into place. Beads of sweat glisten on his forehead, catching the sunlight and creating a halo of light around him.
You find yourself mesmerized by the sight, unable to tear your gaze away from the sight of him. His white tank top clings to his chest, damp with sweat, and the short-sleeved flannel he wears hangs open, exposing the tank top underneath. Every movement sends a shiver down your spine, and you can't help but feel a flush of heat rise to your cheeks.
The sound of his grunts fills the air, low and guttural, and it sends a thrill through you that you can't quite explain. There's something primal about the way he works, a raw energy that draws you in and leaves you feeling breathless.
You watch as he reaches up to adjust a beam, his muscles flexing with the effort, and you can't help but imagine what it would feel like to run your hands over his warm, sweaty skin. The thought sends a shudder coursing through you, and you quickly look away, feeling flustered and embarrassed by the intensity of your thoughts.
But no matter how hard you try to focus on something else, your gaze keeps drifting back to Joel, drawn to him like a moth to a flame. And as you watch him work, you can't help but feel a strange sense of longing stir within.
But for now, all you can do is watch and admire from afar, content to bask in the warmth of Joel's presence as he works tirelessly to repair the roof of the shop. And as you watch him, you can't help but feel a sense of gratitude wash over you.
You take a deep breath, steeling yourself with determination as you clutch the bowl of freshly picked black mulberries and raspberries in your hands. With a quick glance up at Joel, who is perched precariously on the ladder, you gather your courage and make your way outside.
"Hey, Joel!" you call out, your voice tinged with nervousness as you approach the ladder. "I brought you some fruit and iced tea. Thought you could use a break."
Joel looks down at you with a grateful smile, wiping the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. "Thanks. That sounds great."
As he descends the ladder, you can't help but feel a surge of excitement mingled with nervousness. With each step he takes, you steal glances at him, unable to tear your gaze away from the sight of him.
But it's when he reaches the bottom of the ladder and stretches upwards to take the bowl of fruit from your hands that you feel your breath catch in your throat. The movement causes his tank top to ride up slightly, revealing a sliver of his stomach, and you swallow thickly at the sight.
As Joel settles down to enjoy the fruit and iced tea, you find yourself drawn to the empty spot next to him on the porch. With a nervous glance in his direction, you take a seat beside him.
The warmth of the wooden porch beneath you contrasts with the cool breeze that sweeps through, and you can't help but feel a sense of calm settle over you as you sit beside Joel. The silence between you is comfortable, broken only by the occasional sound of birds chirping in the distance.
“Lovely day, ain’t it,” Joel takes a bite of the freshly picked black mulberries, the deep purple juice stains his lips, a stark contrast against the ruggedness of his features, and you find yourself mesmerized by the sight.
The juice glistens in the fading sunlight, tracing a vivid trail along his lips as he savors the sweetness of the fruit. Each movement of his jaw seems deliberate, each bite a study in pleasure as he indulges in the simple pleasure of the moment.
A soft breeze rustles through the trees, lifting strands of his hair and sending them dancing in the golden light. But your gaze remains fixed on his lips.
The silence and sight makes you light-headed and eager to say anything, no matter how idiotic it might be. 
“Aren't you a little old to be doing this much heavy lifting?” 
“Aren't you a little too young to be lookin’ at me like that?” 
Your shoulders rise, blood rushing to your head as you look down. Your heart thuds loudly in your chest. Butterflies flutter madly within you, the wings tickling the insides of your stomach. You only swallow. “Your lips are stained from the mulberry.” 
“Whatever you say, sweetheart.” 
He takes another one, biting down with his lips, he finds your gaze. You watch a tiny drop go down his chin. The two of you are close. So incredibly close. It’s been like this since he started working on the shop. A pull that is too hard to ignore. 
“Well,” he breaks the silence. “Better finish up before the sun sets.” 
Joel stands and your heart breaks a little. You blink from where you’re sat, staring at him, yearning for him. 
“Yeah. Wouldn’t want you trying to find your way home in the dark.” 
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“You know, I could’ve come here on my own. I always do.” 
“I know. Just wanted to make sure you have someone lookin’ after you.” 
“For someone to be known as a grump, you’re quite a softie.” 
“I’m leavin’.” 
“No—!”
Your fingers close around his arm, the warmth of his skin sending a shiver down your spine. For a moment, you find yourself frozen in place, your pulse quickening as you realize just how close you are to him.
Joel's gaze meets yours, and you can see a flicker of something in his eyes, something that makes your heart race even faster. His eyes drop to your lips, lingering there for a moment before snapping back up to meet your gaze. You notice the hints of a fading smile, “You were joking,” you say slowly, letting go of him. 
“That I was, wildflower,” he doesn’t move away and neither do you. Your breath catches within your throat, the moment stretching between your two like rubber. Before you can say anything Joel’s eyes flicker to something behind you and he smiles. “I think we’re here.” 
As you turn around, your heart skips a beat. The field of flowers stretches out endlessly, a sea of color and beauty that seems to go on forever. The grass has grown taller since the last time you were here, swaying gently in the breeze and creating a soft, rhythmic rustle that fills the air.
The sun hangs low in the sky, casting a warm golden light over the landscape and setting the flowers ablaze with color. Reds and yellows, blues and purples, a riot of hues that dance and swirl in the gentle breeze.
You take a step forward, the grass crunching beneath your feet as you walk further into the field. The scent of poppies and blue hyacinths fills your nostrils, sweet and intoxicating, and you can't help but close your eyes and breathe it in.
The wind sweeps across the field, sending waves of grass rippling in its wake. The sound is soothing, a gentle whisper that seems to carry you away on a tide of tranquility.
For a moment, you forget about everything else – the worries and the doubts, the uncertainties and the fears. All that matters is the beauty of this moment, the beauty of this place, and the beauty of being here with Joel. 
With a rush of emotion swirling within you, you turn to Joel, your heart pounding in your chest as you meet his gaze. He's still standing close, his eyes locked on yours with an intensity that takes your breath away.
Without thinking, without hesitating, you lean forward and press your lips to his. At first, Joel is taken aback, his body stiffening in surprise. But then, he caves, his lips moving against yours in a slow, tender rhythm.
His hands come up to cradle your face, his touch gentle yet firm, as if he's afraid you'll disappear if he lets go. You feel his tongue on your bottom lip and open up for him eagerly, the taste of him feels like electricity shooting through you. Heat pools between your legs, Your breasts tingle with the mere thought of having his hands on them, nipples aching and hard. 
Joel breaks away briefly, then closes the distance again. Small hisses against your swollen lips over and over until neither of you can breathe. He hungers for it almost. And so do you. “Joel,” you whisper, eyes cloudy. “Please.” 
“Is that what you want, wildflower?” he drags his nose down the side of your cheek, facial hair scratching delightfully against the sensitive skin of your neck. “For me to fuck you here? Right out in the open?” his voice trembles. “Like animals?” 
“God, yes—” your insides clench. “I would want nothing more. Been thinking about you since the day I met you, your hands, your mouth, you as a whole.” 
His hands drop to your ass and he gives the tender flesh a strong squeeze, “You want me?” 
“I do.” 
You suddenly find yourself on the ground, the grass tickling your exposed legs and arms, the skirt of your dress rolled up to your waist. Joel’s weight is a welcoming comfort on top of you, another gust of warm wind blows. With a groan, he pulls down the sweetheart neckline of your dress, exposing both your breasts. While holding one, he kisses the other, drawing the stiff nipple into his mouth. He sucks harshly, your body jolting with pleasure. The soaking mess between your legs grows. 
“Joel,” you moan, back arching. “Fuck—” 
He swirls the tip of his tongue around the nipple and grazes his teeth against it. Calloused fingers play with the other. Your mind is swimming in pleasure. He brings the skirt of your dress further up and traces his lips down the fabric, when you look down, you see him between your legs, his eyes darker than normal as he stares into your soul. The tips of his fingers dance along the elastic of your panties, asking for permission. 
You breathe out a yes, barely audible, but he nods and tugs the fabric down. When he latches his mouth on to you, the world stops. His mouth feels divine. His tongue delves between your folds, the bridge of his nose rubbing against your clit. You shudder against him and he moans into you. The reverberations of the sound force a gasp out of you and you swear you feel him smiling. 
His fingers trace patterns along your thighs, teasing and stroking as his mouth works wonders between your legs. You're on the edge, the pleasure building up with each flick of his tongue. You reach down and bury your fingers in his hair, pulling him closer, guiding him where you need him the most.
Joel picks up the pace, his tongue moving faster, his fingers slipping inside of you. You can feel your body starting to tighten, the coil in your stomach about to unravel. You grip onto him tighter, your hips bucking against his mouth, and with one final flick of his tongue, you come undone.
You cry out his name, your body shaking with the force of your orgasm. Joel continues to lightly lick and suck, drawing out your pleasure until you're completely spent. He makes his way back up to your lips, kissing you deeply as you both catch your breath.
“That was…” you trail off, unable to find the right words for the mind-blowing experience you just had.
“Amazin’,” Joel finishes for you.
You nod, still a little breathless. You wrap your arms around him, pressing your body against his. Joel's hands roam over your back, his touch sending shivers down your spine. You can feel his erection against your thigh, and you know that he needs release just as much as you do.
“Been so long since I’ve tasted somethin’ this sweet,” he rasps. “Thank you.” 
You hear the blood rushing in your ears, “You’re the sweet one,” you mumble, tenderly touching the scratchy surface of his cheek. “So sweet.” 
He smiles and as he kisses the curve of your palm, shuffles above you, starting to get up. A deep frown forms between your brows. “And where are you going?” you pout, wrapping your arms around him. You feel the outline of his length as he lowers himself once more, the tips of your noses brushing against one another.
“I thought you wanted to gather some flowers.” 
“Not yet,” you murmur, eyes glazed. “At least, not before feeling you inside me.” 
“Fuck, darlin’,” he lets out a whimpering breath, grinding himself against your bare cunt. “You really know how to get a man goin’.” 
“Prove it.” 
His eyes flicker with an emotion you can’t quite describe. His breath stutters, then, without even looking, he unbuckles himself, never breaking eye contact. Joel’s hair ruffles with the wind, yet he doesn’t even blink. The head of his cock catches against your clit, ripping a moan from your throat. He fills you with one sloppy thrust, the length of him stretching you enough to have your eyes rolling to the back of your skull. 
“Joel—Oh my god—” 
“That’s it, good girl, takin’ my cock so well. Feels good?” 
Slack-jawed, you nod. He goes deeper. “Want you to feel me for weeks, wildflower. And I want you to think of me every time you come to this god—” thrust. “—damn” thrust. “—field.” 
You can only moan at his words, his hands grip your lovehandles, squeezing and pulling you closer to him every time he rocks forward. His head falls into the crook of your neck, sinking his teeth into the sensitive skin, he sucks. Your body convulses, shaking against him. 
Sparks ricochet through every limb of your body as you feel the heat pooling in your core. Joel moves his hand from your lower back to cup your breast, his fingers teasing and plucking at your nipple. The pleasure ricochets through your body, making you feel like you're on fire.
“Come for me, darlin’.” Joel growls into your ear, his voice rough and primal. “Come on my cock.”
His words send you over the edge, your body shaking and convulsing beneath him as he continues to thrust into you relentlessly. The world blurs around you, all your senses consumed by the feeling of Joel's body against yours.
"Joel—" you moan, your voice lost in the wind as you reach your peak. 
He groans in response, his thrusts becoming more erratic as he chases his own release. After one final, deep thrust, he pulls out and spills over your stomach, his body shaking against yours. You both ride out the waves of pleasure until finally, you collapse against each other, panting and spent.
You lay in the flower field, a tangled mess of limbs and sweaty bodies. Joel's arms are still wrapped tightly around you, his face buried in your neck as he tries to catch his breath. You run your fingers through his hair, feeling the warmth of his body.
"I've never felt anything like this before," you say quietly, almost to yourself.
Joel lifts his head to look at you, his eyes softening. "Me neither, wildflower. Me neither."
As the sun begins to set, you both lay there, entwined in each other's arms. The field has become a symbol of something more than beauty. And as long as those flowers bloom, you know your love for each other will continue to grow.
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A week. 
A week without hearing from him, seeing him, touching him. 
A painful week. 
It’s almost as if he never existed. As if the moment in your favorite field was nothing but your imagination. The only reason why you know it's real is because Ellie still comes by every day, and despite knowing it’s impossible, you still feel him deep inside. It only heightens whenever you have to travel back to the field to gather flowers for the shop. 
You watch as Ellie places more daisies into a vase. She’s been her usual self, joking around, telling you about all the details of her life. It’s hard not to ask her about Joel and how he’s been. 
Some nasty part of your mind whispers words of discouragement, telling you he only wanted you for your body, for your charm, and got what he wanted. Your heart clenches. It might be true. You were young after all, emotional, broken. He’d already gone through all that, killed to stay alive, for loved ones, gone through grief—why would he want to take on another’s problems as well? 
“Hey, Ellie?” 
She turns to you, eyes slightly wide due to the rasp of your voice, “Yeah boss?” 
“Can you watch the shop for a second, I have something I need to do that I forgot about.” 
You don't wait for her nod as you exit the shop. You know he’s home. He has to be. 
Luckily it doesn’t take you long to reach their house, your knock is loud and swift. You know you’ve taken him by surprise by the expression when he opens the door. His mouth is slightly ajar, his brows knit together. 
“What are you—” 
“I came to talk,” you brush past him, heading inside. Joel lingers at the door but soon after follows you inside anyway. 
He sighs, “What do you want to talk about?” 
You take a deep breath, steeling yourself for what's to come. "Us," you reply, your voice steady despite the turmoil raging inside you. "I need to know what happened, Joel. Why you've been avoiding me."
Joel's jaw clenches at your words, his gaze flickering away for a moment before returning to meet yours. "I ain't good for you," he says, his voice rough with emotion. "You deserve better than someone like me."
You feel a surge of anger rising within you at his words, frustration bubbling up to the surface. "That's for me to decide, Joel," you say, your voice tinged with defiance. "I'm not some fragile flower that needs to be protected. I can make my own choices, and right now, I choose you."
Joel's expression softens slightly at your words, but there's still a hint of sadness in his eyes. "You don't know what you're saying," he says, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'm a mess, a broken man with too much blood on his hands. You deserve someone who can give you the world, not someone who can barely keep himself together. You’re young. You still have so much ahead of you—"
“No! That’s not what I want. I want you, you’re the only person who’s made me feel like. . . like myself. . .before. And wanted.” 
Your voice begins to shake, you see the hesitation within his body, hod his hand slightly moves forward to hold you, to touch you, but he doesn’t. 
“I can’t do this to you,” his hands slide into his pockets, he gestures to the door. “Get out.” 
The blood freezes in your veins, your eyes grow wide, your chest constricts, “What?” 
“I said to get out,” he repeats, a little louder this time. “Get out, please.” 
And you do. 
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“You need to get your shit together.” 
“Language, Ellie, dammit.” 
She glares at him from across the table. It’s an early morning, earlier than he’d liked. He’s been feeling hallowed out ever since your visit. He could see the hurt in your eyes, the betrayal. He knew that he’d broken something when avoiding you, something tender and not so easily fixable. 
But what was he supposed to do? You were young, he didn’t want to trap you, didn’t want you to throw the best years of your life for an old man like him. 
Briefly, he squeezes his eyes shut. His head hurts. All he can think about is you, your body, how eager it was to take him, the delectable curves he couldn’t get enough of. 
He misses your taste on his tongue. 
“She’s miserable too, you know.” 
Joel’s eye snap wide open. “Who?” 
“You know who,” she shakes her head. “I don’t know what happened between you two, but she’s definitely upset and so are you—Just fix it. Don’t be an asshole” 
He let’s out a sigh, she’s right. He needs to fix this somehow. Joel stares at Ellie, her words hitting him harder than he expected. He hadn't realized just how much his actions had affected not only you but also Ellie. The weight of his own guilt settles heavily on his shoulders, a constant reminder of the mess he's made.
"Yeah," he mutters, his voice rough with emotion. "I know."
He runs a hand through his hair, the tension in his muscles making every movement feel heavy and strained. He knows he needs to make things right, to somehow find a way to mend the rift he's created between you and him.
But how? How could he possibly make things right after everything that's happened?
"I'll talk to her," he says finally, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll fix it."
Ellie nods in approval, her expression softening slightly as she looks at him. "Good," she says, her tone gentle. "Because I don't want to see either of you hurting anymore."
She was right and he knew it. 
“The shop’s closed today,” Ellie says as he grabbed his jacket. “I don’t know where she is.” 
But he did. He knew exactly where you would be. The place he tasted you, the place he felt your body against him. 
Joel's heart sinks as he approaches the flower field and sees you sitting there, your shoulders hunched over as you hug your knees to your chest. He can hear your sobs from a distance, the sound echoing through the quiet morning air.
For a moment, he hesitates, unsure of what to do or say. But then, with a heavy sigh, he pushes aside his doubts and makes his way towards you.
As he draws closer, he can see your whole body trembling with the force of your emotions. His heart aches at the sight, knowing that he's the cause of your pain. He kneels infront of you, gently touching your wrists.
"Hey," he says softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "It's me, Joel."
You startle at the sound of his voice, lifting your head to look at him with tear-streaked eyes. For a moment, there's a flicker of surprise in your gaze, followed by a wave of raw emotion.
"Joel?" you choke out, your voice thick with tears. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to find you," he says, his voice filled with regret. "I couldn't stand the thought of you hurtin’ like this."
"I thought... I thought you didn't care," You sniffle, wiping away the tears with the back of your hand. 
Joel reaches out to gently brush a strand of hair away from your face, his touch light and tender. "I care more than you know," he says. "I made a mistake, a big one, and I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I just didn’t want you to. .  .I didn’t think I deserved someone like you."
"I missed you," you admit softly, tears still streaming down your cheeks.
Joel's heart clenches at your words, a rush of emotion flooding through him. Without hesitation, he wraps his arms around you, pulling you close as you bury your face against his chest.
"I missed you too, wildflower," he whispers, his voice thick with emotion. "And I promise, I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy."
He hears the smile in your voice. 
“You already do.” 
1K notes · View notes
cinnnamongrl · 9 months
Text
college!ellie and innocent bsf!reader
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based on this request! [18+] MDNI as usual. ellie is in love with reader but this is pretty much just smut Lol<3 reader is ‘innocent’ but there’s no mention of past experience or lack of so it’s up for interpretation, one reference of readers hair going past her neck, strap referred to as ellie’s cock/dick, praise, some dacryphilia, edging, some degradation. (lmk if i missed anything!)
ellie had mixed feelings about being your best friend.
on one hand, it was the easiest thing in the world. you were thoughtful, kind, sweet, you always made the effort, always knew how to cheer her up, you would even do cute things like bake little cookies and leave them in her dorm every week. she was lucky to have you and she knew it.
but on the other hand, it was fucking torture. not because of how you were as a friend, of course not. more because of how pathetically hard ellie was pining over you. and the worst part was that you had no fucking clue. no clue how she felt. no clue that every time you would innocently rest your head against hers and cuddle up to her while you watched a movie her heart would beat a million beats per minute. no clue that she often spent more time watching you than the movie. no clue that every time you wore one of your pretty little skirts that barely cover your thighs she lost her fucking mind. no clue that after every single hookup, no matter the girl or how hot or interesting she was, after the deed was done ellie swiftly left their dorms to go and spend time with you (and didn’t stop thinking about you during, either). no clue that she only started dating cat to try and prove to herself that maybe she was just lonely and craved a relationship, that it wasn’t you specially that she wanted. and no clue about the real reason they broke up.
“that’s the second fucking time this has happened, ellie! doing it once is one thing but twice? we’re fucking done.” cat screamed from across her dorm. “it was an accident i just- she was on my mind because i’m seeing her later.” ellie spoke back, voice calmer than cat’s. “that’s the fucking problem isn’t it! you’re seeing her later when you could be spending time with your girlfriend. and even when you’re with me, you’re thinking about her!”. ellie sighed, “it’s not like that. she’s my best friend-“ “you said her fucking name while you were having sex with me, ellie! just- go. we’re over.”
ellie felt guilty about it, she really did. but not as guilty as she felt having to lie to you about the reason for the breakup. and no where near as guilty as she felt for the way her clit pumped in her boxers when your tits pressed into hers as you gave her a sympathy hug. “‘m sorry els.” you spoke gently with a little pout on your lips that she wanted to kiss right off you.
truthfully, although you felt bad, you weren’t really sorry they’d broken up. you didn’t like cat. you couldn’t really say why; she was pretty funny, you guess she was kind of cool, and she seemed to really like ellie. but maybe that was the problem. she would drape her hands over ellie, she would kiss ellie’s cheek, she would hug ellie. hug your ellie. so you couldn’t help but feel a little bit happy that now you didn’t have to share her anymore. that’s how everyone felt about their best friend right?
ellie really did feel like a perv when she started to have feelings for you. it was like you were trying to tease her, despite her being sure you had no idea of the effect you had.
“is this dress too short d’you think?” you asked her, craning your neck to look behind you into the big mirror in the tiny dressing room you’d dragged her into. “uh- no it’s fine” she murmured. “yeah but look, if i-“ you bent over slightly and the dress rode up even further, barely covering your ass, and you analysed your reflection “-do that, isn’t it a little too… revealing” no matter how hard she tried couldn’t tear her eyes from you, couldn’t rid herself of the mental image of your hands smudging the mirror as she fucked you from behind, watching your pretty face in the reflection, grasping a hand over your mouth to keep you quiet. “uh i guess it’s pretty short but you um- look good” you smiled big and stood up straight “thanks els.”
it also didn’t help that you were so fucking tactile. holding her hand when you walked to places together, cuddling up to her when you were both chilling on her bed. the first time you put your head on her lap while you watched tv she very nearly audibly groaned.
and god was it hard when you were stressed out. it’s like you became 10x as touchy, practically using her as a stress toy; squeezing her hand, arms, and laying your body across her lap as you ranted about the professor you hated or that upcoming deadline. and she did half of what she wanted to do; she stroked your hair, comforted you with her words, sometimes took you out for ice cream to distract you (which she realised the first time was a grave fucking mistake as soon as she was forced to keep her composure while she watched your tongue swipe agonisingly slow up your cone to collect a sweet vanilla droplet that was travelling towards your hand, and then grin all cute at her like you hadn’t just made her boxers damp). and the other half that she wanted to do but couldn’t? carry you to her bed, undress you all sweet and slow, and then fuck every last inch of stress out of you until the only thing your mind could possibly think about was her and the way she was making you feel.
but none of those moments of temptation and pining rivalled the fiery jealously ellie felt exactly 1 week ago when you told her that a girl from your class had asked you on a date. ellie pretended she didn’t care; what reason could she possibly give for not wanting you to go on a date with a perfectly nice girl. she was always telling you you needed to get some. a stupid part of her brain thought that teasing you like that would cover up that she wanted to be the one to give you some. and an even stupider part of her brain thought maybe if she teased you about it enough that you’d snap and beg her, your more experienced and caring best friend, to take care of you.
secretly, you didn’t really care much about this date, or the girl. she was pretty, but not really your type, and you didn’t really seem to have much of an interest in dating. you weren’t sure why, but a part of you wished ellie told you not to go. you couldn’t understand why “cool. you should go if you want.” made your smile drop slightly and heart feel flat. she was being supportive like any best friend would so why did you feel disappointed? regardless, someone nice wanted to take you out, so you thought ‘why not?’
tonight was the date ellie had been dreading for a very long 7 days. her eyes were following you round your dorm room as you moved from corner to corner scrambling for hair clips, shoes, a jacket, all while a foamy toothbrush stuck out the side of your mouth.
“els help me find that necklace you bought me. the one with the sun on it.” you spoke, words muffled and hands ruffling through your makeup bag. “you’re gonna wear the necklace i bought you?” you looked up “yeah, why not?”. ellie crossed her arms. she had no defence. she just hated the fact that you would be wearing the necklace she bought you for your birthday last year on a date with someone else. “it’s my favourite!” you chirped.
ellie watched for a little longer, making no effort to look for your necklace, manspreading on the edge of your bed. you hated when she did that. it made your tummy feel all funny and squirmy.
“finally!” you spoke suddenly after a few minutes of searching, turning to her with the necklace dangling from your fingers. ellie raised her eyebrows in faux enthusiasm. you weren’t stupid, you sensed she was a little off since you’d been getting ready. “you ok els?” she shuffled a little on your bed “yeah, why wouldn’t i be?”. you walked a little closer to her, “do you not think i should go on this date?” you asked. ellie’s mind flooded with say yes say yes say yes “no-“ she spoke “no- you should go if you want.” seriously? but what excuse did she have anyway? please don’t go on a date with a perfectly nice girl because i’m desperately in love with you and the thought of you with someone else makes me want to rip my heart out. whatever, she just hoped the date sucked. “oh ok.” you replied, a little flatly. did you- want her to say yes? ellie thought. there were a few seconds of silence that hung in the air.
you turned the other way and stood still, “can you do me up?” ellie stayed still, confusion evident in her voice “what?” you turned your head to look at her “my necklace!” “oh-“ ellie stood from your bed and stopped when she was standing facing your back. your hair fell past your neck, covering the back of the necklace, so ellie gently gathered it and laid it to one side over your shoulder. her movements were slow. lingering. almost like it was an effort to take her hand away. her fingers grazing your neck made little tingles gather at your skin which you hoped she couldn’t read from you. ellie always made you feel these weird pleasurable little buzzes when she touched you or looked at you in certain ways, but right now it was heightened, making it harder to ignore, harder to convince yourself they were normal things to feel around your best friend. she moved a step closer as she picked up the two ends of your necklace to attach them. she was close now, her chest almost pressing up against your back.
ellie knew she was treading the line, she allowed her fingers to linger for a few seconds too long as she helped you but she couldn’t help it. it was as if it was her last chance to touch you in case the date went well. she attached the two pieces together and let go of the chain, not moving from her place behind you. she let out a slow breath and it met your neck. you shivered. you hoped she didn’t notice.
she did. her eyes watched you; you were still, apart from the slight movement of your shoulders from breathing a little heavier. ellie’s lowered her voice to a whisper, “you shivered”. you didn’t turn back around. didn’t want her to see you flustered, see your chest rising and falling a little more rapidly and your heart beating quickly. “‘i’m cold” you lied. “yeah?” she questioned, unconvinced. “it’s july.” she added, voice low in your ear. a small sound left your throat, and she chuckled at you. “y’look so pretty. she’s a lucky girl.” you mumbled a ‘thanks’ and she moved both hands to let her fingers stoke alongside the straps of your dress and then slowly down the side of your ribs. “gotta be careful though. you almost look too good… wouldn’t want her getting the wrong idea” you stayed silent. “hm, pretty girl?”. you swallowed, “mm” you managed back. what the hell was she doing to you? something had switched; you were always touchy with each other but this was different; it felt like she knew something about you that you didn’t even know yourself. all the attention and her soft condescending tone was making your head spin.
“you nervous for the date?” ellie asked. a small “mhm” passed your lips. another lie. you weren’t nervous, you just didn’t want to go. ellie tutted a little insincerely “why?” and now her hands were on your sides, thumbs stoking up and down, increasing the nervous tingly buzz through your body. “you don’t wanna go?” you hesitated for a moment and then shook your head. “w-wanna stay here with you” you admitted. she dipped her head down to the curve that meets your neck and your shoulder and she kissed the skin there. “why’s that?” her hands were moving to your hips, she was letting them roam a little, treading that line even further with every inch closer to your thighs. you squeezed your eyes shut, your body felt like it was on fire and you equally hated and loved how weak she was making you feel right now. “cause y-you’re my best friend” you replied weakly. she chuckled again. “best friends don’t make you feel the way people you date do.” a boldness had seemed to ignite in her, sparked by her sudden realization that although you couldn’t see what you did to her, she made you nervous. and ellie had been with enough girls to read the signs when someone is fucking turned on. and that, you were.
her voice was low in your ear, tone darker, “best friends don’t make you nervous.” your eyes remained shut. ellie removed a hand from your hip and ran a finger up the skin your inner arm, bringing goosebumps to the surface. “best friends don’t make you feel all tingly” before you could make up your mind whether to defend yourself or completely give in to her, her hands were back on your hips and she pressed herself against you. your head fell back slightly onto her shoulder. “best friends…” she dipped a hand under your dress and cupped a hand around your clothed cunt “…don’t make you wet”
you whimpered, and reached your hand back to grip onto hers, keeping yourself steady. “els” you whined. she ran a finger over the damp fabric and you whimpered again when it reached your clit. “isn’t that right?”. you nodded, managing a quiet “mhm”. she moved your panties to the side, sliding two fingers through your wetness “who’s this for, hm? who got you this messy?” she taunted. “you” you whispered back, barely audible. “that’s right. y’think your little date could get you wet like this?” god she was mean. she knows. she knows about your secret feelings you’re not even sure you understand yourself. you wonder if she knows the extent. that she makes your head swim whenever she calls you calls you pretty, that you spend endless nights pathetically humping your pillow desperately pushing down thoughts of her trying to convince yourself she was popping up because you just spent so much time together. what you don’t know is that she only figured all this out 3 fucking minutes ago.
you shook you head “just you els”. she tutted mockingly “poor baby. you need me to take care of you?” she continued to let her fingers rub through your folds, “please”. she tapped your hip “turn around, i wanna see your pretty face” you turned, shyness forcing your head to face down to avoid her eyes. ellie grabbed your chin to lift your face up and she kissed you. you moaned into it and a groan escaped her throat at hearing you. your date was long fucking forgotten. “y’sure you want this?” “yes els, please.” she smiled at your desperation and picked you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around her. she pressed you down onto the bed, her hips snug against yours.
not even 5 minutes later you were stripped bare, little whimpers and moans tumbling from your lips as she worked her mouth on you. every time you got close she stopped to place little kisses on your inner thighs, obsessed with seeing you huff in desperation. “elliiieeee” you’d whine and she’d shush you as soon as her mouth was back on your clit. after your third orgasm she finally drew her mouth from you. she moved her face back up to yours and kissed you, sloppily mixing her saliva with yours.
after that, the two of you barely left each others beds all day. ellie was even more feral than she’d been before, something she didn’t realize was possible. when you were in class? she was texting you shit like ‘wanna taste u again‘ knowing you’d be scrambling to turn your brightness down. and as soon as class was over and you knocked on her door? she was dragging you in, caging you in against the wall and pushing your skirt up.
and it wasn’t too long until she finally got to make use of that strap she’d never even opened (despite not believing her feelings would ever be reciprocated, she’d bought it with only one person in mind, and she just couldn’t bring herself to use it with anyone else that wasn’t that one person…)
she was hovered over you, dragging the silicone cock up and down your slit at an agonising pace, teasing little sounds from you. “you sure you can take it?” she teased. “mhm, i can take you, promise” fuck, you were killing her. she filled you slowly, letting you get used to her size. “more” you near-whispered, eyes squeezed shut from embarrassment. “hey- eyes on me,” she instructed, and you let your eyes fall onto her “you want more?”. you nodded, “please”. ellie pecked your lips and started to move her hips, her cock dragging against your walls making your mouth fall open. ellie was watching you, eyes full of lust and something more. “so so good for me. so pretty” she cooed. your head was already going fuzzy, she’d always made your heart feel fluttery when she praised you but like this, it was a whole different story. she was deep, filling you completely and then nearly pulling out again, making you feel so full in the most perfect way. she snaked a hand under your head and lifted it slightly so you were looking at where your bodies connected “look at that,” she breathed, “taking me so well”. a moan escaped your throat as you watched her cock disappear in and out of you.
despite the desperation pawing at her skin to fuck you stupid as soon as her strap was inside you, she decided she would rather drag it out… get you desperate, pleading, hear your needy little whines, see your eyebrows drawn together in that adorable little expression that screams “please fuck me faster ellie” and when she finally did, she was still dragging it out, being so mean and not letting you cum. after 20 minutes of the same routine of giving you exactly what you wanted and then slowing down again when you got close, you didn’t even notice your eyes filling up with tears, and the pathetic begs coming from your mouth skipped past the filter that usually would’ve caught them before they were spoken.
“please ellie, please. wanna cum so bad” she pouted down at you as she wiped a tear that had rolled down your cheek “you crying baby? you wanna cum that bad?” you nodded your head frantically, blinking the tears away. she tilted her head to the side, “i might not let you- you look so pretty like this”. a strangled whine left you at her threat. but she picked up her pace again, and only a few minutes later you were almost reaching your peak again and this time she was nice. so so nice. as you started to reach your climax she kissed you. you gripped her tightly and your body started to shake as she groaned into your mouth “that’s right. come for me, pretty girl”.
ellie thought missionary would always be her favourite; she wanted to be able to see your face twisted in pleasure, to have your neck, your tits, your stomach right in view on display for her… but the first time you let her hit it from the back? it was like it released something feral inside of her, and she was suddenly spilling everything she’d been keeping inside for so long.
“god, you know how fucking hard it was for me? when you’d walk around in those tiny fucking skirts? cute little ass almost showing-“ she was rambling, words falling out of her mouth as she fucked you, your ass arched up and her hands gripping your hips as she drove into you hard “made it so hard for me not to bend you over and make you take it.” you clenched around the plastic at her words “mmgh you- you should have.” you managed in broken breaths, both of you too drunk on each other to really process what you were saying. “yeah, you woulda liked that? filthy little thing. bet you did it on purpose, huh? wore those little clothes cause you wanted me to snap and finally fuck you like a little slut?” your breathing was all over the place, practically panting as your head went fuzzy from her words. “mhm” you mumbled. ellie was close herself, the harness rubbing deliciously against her clit as she fucked you, mind fuzzy with the idea of coming with you. “rub your clit for me, angel” she spoke “wanna see you cum all over my dick”. you obeyed, lifting a hand to rub little circles on your swollen bud, intensifying the pleasure by tenfold and brining you even closer to your release. it wasn’t long until the pleasure was all-consuming, your eyes rolling back as she fucked you through your orgasm. before you could come down from it she was reaching her own a few seconds later, her pretty mouth hung open in pleasure and hands still gripping your hips tight.
a few minutes later you were both laid beside each other, limbs crossing and bodies sticky with heat as your breathing started to return to normal. “was that all true? was it really that hard to be around me?” you giggled. ellie snorted “yeah, to be honest. drove me fucking crazy” she smiled at you teasingly, “you’re still hard to be around”. your eyebrows raised “in a good way?” ellie let out a small laugh, “yeah in a good way. in a ‘how can you walk around looking that beautiful and expect me not to wanna kiss your face off in front of the entire lecture hall’ way”. you giggled, “that’s so sweet”. she smirked at you, “and then have your legs held up on my shoulders as i ea-” “ellie!” you shoved her playfully, embarrassment returning in your post-sex come down. she laughed out loud “don’t get all shy on me now! did you hear yourself 10 minutes ago?” she teased. you twisted your body the other way to hide your face but she grabbed you, holding you down and ignoring your giggly pleas, nipping little kisses all over your face and neck.
it didn’t take long for your laughter and playful teases to settle and sleepiness to overtake. and both of you always slept well like this; curled up tightly against each other, completely still apart from rising chests and a hand tracing little circles on a leg or stomach. and now a slight movement from your hips that accidentally pushed into ellie in a not-so-innocent way, or a sweet sleepy sigh that makes her heart flutter, didn’t interrupt her sleep with racing thoughts of guilt and confusion- now they simply lulled her into contented rest, knowing that you were all hers.
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missukiyo · 2 months
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NOT WITH(OUT) ME
— ex bf! suguru geto x reader
·.⌇ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. four months into your breakup, running into your ex with his new special someone forces you to confront lingering feelings that you thought you had buried.
tags: angst, hurt no comfort, no curse au, pining, jealousy, hinted insecurities, lmk if i’ve missed any!
word count: 1.7k
a/n: instead of studying for my upcoming uni tests, this is what i do instead… procrastination who?
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Four months.
It had been four months.
Four months since you and Suguru had called it quits. Four months since he had gently explained that he no longer felt the same way. Four months since he admitted that he needed space and time to focus on himself.
The breakup had been amicable, with both of you realizing that your paths were no longer aligned.
Suguru had been kind and understanding, expressing his gratitude for the time you had spent together. It was a bittersweet moment, but you had accepted it and moved on.
Or so you thought.
As you walked through the bustling markets of Shibuya, you caught a glimpse of Suguru out of the corner of your eye.
He was with a girl, her laughter filling the air as she leaned into his side.
The girl talking to Suguru was the epitome of beauty, the kind that belonged on the glossy pages of Vogue. Her pixie-cut brown hair framed her sharp features perfectly, accentuating her high cheekbones and the soft curve of her jawline. Her hazel eyes resembled pools of liquid honey, illuminating in the sunlight.
Your heart clenched at the sight, a pang of jealousy twisting in your stomach. How could he already be with someone new? It hadn't even been that long since you had broken up.
Suguru looked up, his eyes widening in surprise when he finally noticed you standing only a few meters away from them. "Hey, how have you been?" His tone was somewhat warm, genuine even. For a mere second, it was as if no time had passed between you, as if everything was still the same.
You forced a smile, trying to mask the hurt that was bubbling beneath the surface. "I've been good," you replied, your voice steady despite the storm raging inside you. "Who's that?" you gestured to the girl beside him, trying to keep your tone casual.
Suguru glanced at the girl, a smile quirking at the corner of his lips. "This is Rei. Y/N, meet Rei. Rei, meet Y/N," he introduced her, his eyes filled with warmth. "She's a friend from work."
You felt a surge of relief at his words. Rei was just a friend, nothing more. Maybe there was still a chance for you and Suguru to mend things, to find your way back to each other.
As you tried to compose yourself, Rei spoke up, her voice pleasant. “It’s really nice to meet you!”
You managed a tight smile, trying to calm yourself down. “Likewise,” you replied, your voice barely a whisper.
She’s just a friend. She’s just a friend. She’s just a friend.
Yet despite his somewhat reassuring words, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more between them. The warmth in his eyes, the gentle smile playing on his lips, the way his gaze lingered just a moment too long... It all mirrored the way he used to look at you.
Despite his words, his actions spoke volumes. The way he leaned in slightly closer to Rei, the way his hand brushed against hers as they talked, it was all too familiar. The way he used to look at you like that, almost as if you were the only person in the world, like nothing else mattered but the two of you.
But as you studied the way Suguru and Rei interacted, the easy camaraderie between them, you couldn't shake the feeling that they were more than just friends.
Rei grabbed Suguru's arm excitedly, pointing to a trendy boutique. "Sugu, pleaseee, can you buy me that cute jacket? I promise I'll wear it all the time," she pleaded, giving him her best puppy-dog eyes.
“Don’t you already have enough of those?” He asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.
Rei groaned as she held onto his arm even tighter. “C’mon Sugu, please? F’me? It’s called retail therapy for a reason.”
Suguru chuckled, shaking his head with a smirk. "But Rei, I'm already taking you to my favorite cafe later. Isn't that enough of a treat for you?" he teased, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Favourite cafe, hm? Must mean I’m quite special, eh?”
Rei and Suguru seemed to have an easy rapport, their banter flowing effortlessly. It was clear that they had a connection, one that went beyond mere friendship. The realisation made your heart ache even more.
You raised an eyebrow at Rei's response, a hint of curiosity in your voice. "Oh, which cafe are you talking about?" you asked, trying to keep your tone casual despite the pang of nostalgia that tugged at your heart.
Rei beamed at you, excitement lighting up her eyes. "Some place called Café Miyama. I’ve never been there but Sugu claims it's his favorite spot in the whole city," she replied, her voice filled with enthusiasm.
Your heart sank as soon as the words ‘Café Miyama’ escaped her lips. It was the same cafe, the exact same cafe that Suguru used to take you to all the time when you were still together.
You felt a lump form in your throat as memories flooded your mind. The cozy corner booth where you would spend hours talking and laughing. The smell of freshly brewed coffee that permeated the air. The way Suguru would look at you with so much love and adoration in his eyes.
But you kept your thoughts to yourself, choosing not to mention the significance of the cafe to Suguru and Rei. Instead, you simply nodded, feigning nonchalance. "Oh, that sounds great…" you said with a smile, though it didn’t quite reach your eyes.
Rei turned to you, her gaze softening. “Would you like to join us, Y/N? I’d love to get to know you better!” Rei exclaimed, her tone sounding genuinely inviting. “Besides, the more the merrier,” she added on. Rei smiled sweetly at Suguru, playfully poking his arm. "Hey, Sugu, do you mind if Y/N tags along with us to the cafe?”
You hesitated, unsure of how to respond. Part of you wanted to decline, to spare yourself the pain of seeing Suguru with someone else, even though he had claimed that she was just a ‘friend.’ But another part of you longed to be near him, to feel his presence once again.
Before you could respond, Suguru interjected, his expression one of concern. “It’s okay, Rei. Y/N probably had plans,” he said, shooting you a sympathetic glance.
You couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions at Suguru's words. On one hand, you were hurt that he seemed to be avoiding the situation and diverting the plan. On the other hand, you understood that things had changed between the two of you, and it was no longer the same as it used to be.
It made you wonder if Suguru had ever truly loved you the way you had loved him.
‘I mean, who would want their ex to barge in while you’re in the middle of a potential date?’ You thought as you tried to play his reluctance off.
“I-I think I’ll pass, thanks,” you replied with a forced smile. “I have some errands to run anyway.”
That was a lie.
You knew that once you got home, all you would do was collapse into bed and sleep the day away. Running errands was the last thing on your mind.
“Awh! That’s a shame. Maybe next time?” Rei offered, a genuine smile on her face. You quickly returned a small nod, avoiding eye contact with her.
“Well, we better get going now. It was nice to catch up with you, Y/N,” Suguru said politely, before turning his back against you.
A simple “bye” was all you could mutter as you watched the love of your life walk away from your life yet again.
As Rei and Suguru made their way towards the cafe, the sight of his arm on the small of her back sent a shiver down your spine. Memories of your relationship with Suguru flooded back, the good times and the heartbreak. It was strange to see him with someone else, especially with someone like Rei. They seemed so natural together, as if they had been together for years.
You couldn't help but feel guilty for feeling so jealous of Rei, especially considering how kind and sweet she had been towards you despite the fact that you had only met her for the first time today. Her genuine warmth and friendly nature made you feel welcomed and at ease, yet seeing her with Suguru ignited a surge of envy within you that you found hard to suppress
Who could blame you though? For love makes people do crazy things.
You loved Suguru so much. No, you still love Suguru as much as you did when you were dating him. He was the one that you thought you were meant to be with — you wholeheartedly believed the pair of you were ‘soulmates’, as one would say. He was someone who understood you like no other.
But that was all in the past now.
Seeing Suguru with someone new, someone who made him laugh and smile the way you used to, was a harsh reminder of what you had lost.
His absence from your life had been a tough pill to swallow after two whole years of being together.
It took him a couple of weeks to go off and court her.
You couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh at the irony of it all, as you continued on your own path, trying to push aside the nagging thoughts of what could have been.
Sure, he claimed they were ‘just friends’, but actions always spoke louder than words.
You had the last two years by his side, sharing moments, dreams, and countless memories. Now, seeing him move on while you still cling to the remnants of what once was, it's a bitter pill to swallow. Despite the hurt and the longing, you know deep down that sometimes, love simply isn't enough to sustain a relationship. But oh, how you still miss him, with every fiber of your being, even as you try to convince yourself to let go and move forward.
Sometimes, love isn’t enough to keep a relationship going.
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© MISSUKIYO | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work
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hotxcheeto · 9 months
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im begging for a fic with ellie about tribbing i don't even care about the plot at this point i just an ellie fic with scissoring
━ 𝐁𝐀𝐃 𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐀, 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ?
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𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨) - Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader
𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 - Cursing, ex gf!ellie, angst here and there, SMUT, tribbing, kissing/make out session, lowkey toxic behavior, mentions and situations with alcohol, both ellie and reader are tipsy, party environment in the first 1/2, top!ellie, bottom!reader
𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 ? - Yeah/Nope
𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚 - ehhehehehehe i love olivia rodrigo so i had to bruh REQUESTS ARE OPEN NOW!
REBLOG MY WORK! I WORK HARD & IT'S APPRECIATED!!
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Music bumped in the room on the other side of the wall that supported the upper cabinet that held your head. The smell of sweat, alcohol and cigarettes filled up the small kitchen to the brim while a few people laughed and chugged the concoction in the punch bowl that sat on the corner countertop.
Other than the patrons drinking themselves into a very horrible morning that was soon to come, there was a couple making out against the fridge. Bothering anyone that wanted to drink something other than what the party host called, 'the ultimate punch to the gut' that the college boys were frothing over.
You decided on something else that you'd scavenged from the liquor cabinet that had been broken into earlier in the night. The liquid a pink color, bubbling from the continued sloshing in your red solo cup that was lazily hanging from your hand.
Your head felt dizzy at all the uproar in the room, the only thing keeping your two feet flat on the ground was the girl in front of you. Chasing your gaze with her head that way with each direction you looked, her eyes weren't far behind to follow.
"I told you I'm done, Ellie. I'm sick of your shit." You slurred slightly, having swayed your hips on far too many people and had too many drinks to care about how you currently sounded.
Or looked for that matter, lipstick smudged across your lips and even had made its way off your mouth. Eye makeup mirroring the appearance of the lower half of your face and all the while your dress was halfway up your thighs from her prying and your continuous attempts to stop yourself from making a decision you'd regret.
"You're a fakeass bitch, y'know that?" You pointed at her, the manicure that she had in fact paid for practically mocking her as she grabbed your hand and pushed it down, holding it in her own.
"Don't be like that, babe." You rolled your eyes at just the sound of her voice, suddenly hearing it and comparing it to the biggest annoyance in the world. "You were like that first, or did you already discard the lap warmer you were entertaining when I walked in?"
Right, the bottle blonde with the bad roots.
"Y/n..." She dragged out your name with that excruciating tone that made you feel like you'd done something bad. "Answer me Ellie."
She opened and closed her mouth for a second, not meeting your eyes before shrugging her shoulders. The black fabric of her long sleeve button up going with, pissing you off even more as the realization set in that she'd worn your favorite of her nice shirts and even undone the top few buttons you always undid for her.
"She's one of Abby's friends, fuck Y/n, I don't even know her name I promise." You scoffed, leaning your head back on the cupboard, looking over at the drunk guys challenging each other to drink a full cup of the punch once again.
"You piss me off." You rubbed your eyes, not caring of the slight burn that your lashes caused on your irises. "I know. C'mon, I said sorry." She said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"You sent me fifty-eight text messages, I don't remember there being a 'sorry' in there though." "Babe-" Ellie stopped when she realized you were in fact not paying any attention to her now, looking out the kitchen window, but it was too dark to actually see anything past the glass.
"C'mon... let's just go home, I'll give you the best apology fucking ever." The alcohol really boosted her confidence as she said this, Ellie moving to kiss up your neck as you thought, her thumb coming to wipe the smeared lipstick away.
"I promise, babe." You wanted to fall against her and give in, just how you wanted when you seen her earlier eye-fucking you from across the room. Fucking hell you were such a gullible mess.
"Ellie..." "Can't tell me you don't miss my fingers..." "Shh!"
You tried covering her mouth but it was no use as she just laughed, looking down at your pretty eyes while you tried to shut her up.
"I don't, mine work just fine, actually." Such fakeness followed those syllables, even you cringed slightly on the inside as you spoke them.
"Huh, so you're lying to me now too?"
"No..." Yes.
"You're a bad liar." She then whispered, impossible to hear her if you had not been so close to her mouth. "You're a dickhead." You then replied, giving her a smile while pulling back.
That was nothing to her, leaning forward despite your unwillingness just earlier, but something about the way you met her lips wondered if you changed your mind.
She tasted like the shitty alcohol mix those dudes were chugging along with soaked in Chapstick and the two combined creating a rush of memories that came trickling back. Those pictures soon invading your mind all the same, fingers wrapping around her belt loops before you got a chance to stop them.
And in the haze of the smoky kitchen you broke your promise to each of your friends promising you wouldn't go back. Tugging her closer and allowing her to rest her hands beneath your ass, holding the backs of your thighs to get impossibly closer.
She was your everything and nothing, the mess stuck between your floorboards that you could never fully get rid of. Ellie knew she wasn't going anywhere, she couldn't and wouldn't be replaced and it was comforting, smirking as she began pushing herself against you and hitting your hips against the counter.
"M'not-" A kiss. "-gonna fuck you-" Another kiss. "-here." You finished, her tongue invading your mouth as soon as the final breath passed your lips. "Why not?" "Seriously?" Ellie rested her forehead against your own, huffing like a child until you tapped her phone that was in her back pocket.
"You can start your apology by buying the ride home, 'kay?"
God, the things she did to see you as you were now, laid back on the bed with your dress pulled up and your head resting against her pillows. Thighs spread all for her while you stared up and watched her unbuckle her belt and unzip her jeans. Wanting nothing more than to have her between your thighs
You just looked so gorgeous in the lamplight, the yellow glow kissing your skin and she moved to kiss it as well. Wanting just as much as the inanimate object had gotten in the past few moments.
"M'gonna be so mad at myself in the morning." You grumbled playfully, Ellie watching you grin at your own prediction, returning the smile while throwing her shirt away and exposing her torso for you to run your eyes over. "But I don't even care." You concluded.
Your nail ran along the light bulge her muscles created on her arms, eyes fluttering shut while her lips made their home on your neck. Jaw becoming her favorite place to hover, smirking against your flesh when you giggled that it had tickled. Looking at the way her boxers met her lower back, little dimples just barely shadowed.
"Ellie?" She pulled back to look at you, cradling your face in her hands.
"Yeah?"
"Unzip me, I wanna feel you."
She didn't have to be told twice, helping you from your dress before tossing it to find the next morning. Your undergarments going with, swept away like they were stolen by the ocean. Your body running against hers as if you were the waves and she were the rocks, though less jagged then you'd like to admit out loud.
Her curves were softer than you remembered despite feeling them just days ago, along with her freckled skin.
"I want you." She whispered, mouth brushing against the shell of your ear.
Your friends were so gonna put you in time out.
Her boxers fell down her legs and yours wrapped around her hips, waiting for the agonizing thumping of your arousal to be put at ease. The discomfort growing while her fingers ran along your nipple, warm breath fanning your face as you both watched her hand run along your boob.
It was like the air paused along with your movements, sucking in a gasp as she played with your breast. Hand trickling down between your legs just to barely tease you.
"You wanna feel me?" You nodded at her question, moving your head up and down again and again while she lined herself up with you. Fingers lightly, just barely, brushing against your little, yet swollen, clit.
"Need to hear you say it again, Y/n."
"I wanna feel you, Ellie."
And before you knew it she was humping herself against you, not even attempting to muffle your sounds which you'd given up caring about. Grabbing at her back and holding her as close to you as possible while her clit bumped and rubbed against your own.
It felt like fireworks, despite having done this just over a million times. Burying your face in her neck while she fucked into you over and over, promising her love silently while whispering things that would make a catholic mother weep.
"Missed you so much..." You turned your head, meeting her eyes as your lips did the same. "Me or this?" You asked, a choked whimper following when she became rougher at the sound of your falsely innocent question. Her hand trapping your leg on the bed as she spread you apart.
"Both, but mainly you." She played off, her other hand softly wrapping around your neck. "I would hope." You giggled, mouth dropping agape as her pace picked up. The whole bed rocking back and forth while simultaneous creaks that were sure to piss off her neighbors for the next however long she spent on top of you.
"Oh fuck, El... fuck please..." You squeezed and clawed at her, sure to leave red marks on her pale skin for her to be teased about when she went to the gym. Cunts grinding back and forth creating a heavenly feeling you just couldn't describe, choking out noise after noise.
"El... m'gonna- fuck I- fuck..." She kissed along the column of your throat, squeezing just the slightest. "I know." From your hole to your bundle of nerves, in your slightly inebriated state it felt like too much.
Sounds you weren't aware you could make falling from your mouth, and you were sure you heard her lightly grunt. Hips stuttering as you'd begun to jerk against her pussy, letting out a yelp while you trickled into your orgasm.
A mix of both you and her dripping down your ass, but it didn't stop you from trying to meet her thrusts. Crying a bit when she slammed you back down, kissing you and then down your chest.
"Leah's gonna be so pissed at me." You huffed, staring up at the ceiling as she peeled herself off of you and fell to the side. Giving you the option of moving to lay with her or finding your way the hell out of here.
"Who cares? Come ride me." She said, sitting up against her pillows that laid against her headboard. "Seriously?' You tilted your head up to glance at her, giving her your best unimpressed expression.
"What? Can't take it back anyway."
This was a bad idea, right?
"Will you eat me out after?" You asked, tilting your head and then rolling over to make your way up to her. "If you do a good job." She said, setting her hands on your hips.
Fuck it, it's fine.
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a/n: YES I KNOW THAT SHE'S MY EX BUT CAN'T TWO PEOPLE RECONNECT I ONLY SEE HER AS A FRIEND! BIGGEST LIE I EVER SAID.
REQUESTS OPEN
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wordsinhaled · 8 months
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“I need you” isn’t “I love you,” and it isn’t “Yes, let’s go off together,” but the thing is, it might as well be. And it might be one of the more honest things Aziraphale has ever said.
He has never said it aloud before now. Not like this, with eons worth of raucous indignant feeling crawling up into his throat. He had not wanted, not expected to say it like this, mocked by his own stricken reflection in Crowley's sunglasses, each lens a dark mirror.
"I—I need you," says Aziraphale, and his voice breaks down the middle. It might as well, for he's confessed too late. Crowley is shut to him, recedes from him like a wave broken on the terrible bedrock of Aziraphale's futile stubbornness.
And still, even like this, Aziraphale needs him.
His presence, his constancy. His unfailing, tenacious friendship.
Crowley’s kindness, his softness, his solicitousness under the prickly façade Aziraphale sees is just that—a layer that can be so easily peeled away to reveal the deep core of caring beneath, too entrenched to be deserved by any world they could live in. He needs Crowley’s unguarded gaze, needs the way Crowley’s forever looking at him across distances when he thinks Aziraphale doesn’t notice: chin tilted up, eyes soft as marigold petals.
A phone call away whenever anything or nothing at all happens is Crowley’s dear voice; his lovely dry humor; his sauntering, slithering, improbable walk despite which he somehow flawlessly falls into step alongside Aziraphale anywhere and all the time. His hip knocking against Aziraphale’s, casual as anything and yet so much more than. Flashes of black and wisps of red flitting in and out of Aziraphale’s periphery for thousands of years.
He needs their circuitous arguments, their winding ethical debates—after most of which they somehow end up on the same side, that is, their own side, terrifying and exhilarating in its Promethean familiarity—and Crowley’s chaotically-sure moral compass. The times Crowley is braver than Aziraphale could ever be; and the times Crowley reminds him of how brave he actually always has been.
And Aziraphale needs even the great big awful rows, the ones that end in their standing on opposite verges of another chasm of their own making. Because the culmination of such a fight is always the meeting again in the middle. It’s the low sweeping bow of their apology, a ritual not half earnest for all its facetiousness, which says so much without either of them having to utter a word. Crowley holds a whole conversation in the dip of his fiery head and the exaggerated flutter of his elegant wrists, when it’s his turn; and, when it’s Aziraphale’s, the hashing-out of differences is there in the way he executes each familiar movement with the practiced ease of a faithful courtier, though it’s been ages since he stood in any king’s court.
He needs the knowledge that they always forgive each other. Because, well, they do. They must. They will. What’s a spat or a quarrel or even a proper falling-out to two beings like them, to him and Crowley?
Aziraphale needs Crowley’s happiness. His truest happiness. If that isn't the crux of it all, what is?
He remembers the ancient light of Crowley's joy, how it had shone once about both of them like an aura through the blackness of undeveloped space. It never left, all that bright, barely reined-in giddiness, all that frenetic energy, but he's transmuted it, magpie-like, into something else. Aziraphale can sense it whenever Crowley brings him a new vintage record to add to his collection. Whenever Crowley pulls out Aziraphale’s chair for him outside Marguerite's, or orders just what he likes for him at the Ritz. Whenever he drops into the shop unannounced with a little box tucked under his arm, full of gorgeous petits fours from the new bakery Aziraphale hasn’t yet tried, and says, gleeful, Ohhh, you wouldn’t believe all the wiling I had to do to get my hands on these, angel. You’ll have to thwart me for this, I know. But first—no, no, no, first! The only sensible thing for you to do would be to try them… you’ll like the pear macaron...
And of course Crowley is right. He's right about most things, isn't he, after all? Because Crowley knows him, and he needs to be known, but it simply wouldn't do for anyone else to be the one doing the knowing.
Aziraphale likes the pear macaron, just as Crowley knew he would.
He likes all the things that come along with Crowley, really. The fast car, oh yes, sleek and stylishly classic and so very Crowley through and through, though Aziraphale has committed staunchly to grousing about it. The way no companionable silence held in Crowley's company is ever truly silent. The jaunts to the park on seasonable days: Crowley's touch lingering where he pours frozen peas for the ducks into Aziraphale's cupped palm; the fondness in Crowley's tone poorly disguised as he points out his favorite mated pair trawling placidly across the pond. The drinking together long past the small hours of the morning in the back room of the bookshop, where the walls are the same warm ochre shade as Crowley’s eyes.
It isn't ever so much about the drinking as it is about the together bit. How the space between them dwindles with the syrupy passage of time. How Crowley softens and melts into the settee. How he becomes Aziraphale's to watch, for once. How he grows so wondrously relaxed and gloriously at home there in Aziraphale's space that Aziraphale begins to wonder if this will at last be the night Crowley does not, eventually, get up and retreat back to his Bentley to take himself away again...
There is always that fragile little moment, right after sobering up, when everything in their universe seems at the same time to be entirely too set in stone and entirely too much as though it all hangs by one delicate, dissembling thread. Always the split second in which Aziraphale looks into Crowley's guileless face and remembers he could unravel everything with a single tug.
Yes, one sharp tug on the lapels of Crowley's jacket would do it, he knows. How easily it could be done... Tumble the two of them into one another, just then, and they would never be parted again. And his deft-tongued Crowley would lick the heat and the aftertaste of Talisker into Aziraphale's mouth, then, before it had the chance to dissipate completely.
He could. He could.
It's in those stretched milliseconds, brimming with a tender longing so acute it tips right over into an agony, that Aziraphale realizes: I do need all of you, darling, don't I? So terribly much it might unmake me one day. Never mind Aziraphale's most fickle and blustering attempts at denial, he knows this to be true as he knows the truth of little else in the cosmos.
And perhaps today is that day—the day Aziraphale will dissolve and be remade in the permanent shape of lack.
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factual-fantasy · 7 months
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Okay so I did some research on Seam and realized that it would be a crime to not add him to my AU in someway where him and Jevil reconcile and they escape to the multiverse together and are free and they're best friends and- 😭😭😭
I had a dark story all thought up for this but half way through drawing I changed the story so this isn't really canon anymore?? Or it might be idk- my Deltarune AU is only a few days into development so its constantly changing <XDD Sorry-
If anyone's interested in the story I've got it below the Keep reading :}} (Fair warning, its rather dark and disturbing..)
TLDR: This story is super dark and interesting to me but it might not be canon XD
ANYWAYS! The story behind this was Jevil and Seam come from a very dark and corrupt AU. Ruled by an even darker and wicked King (Lancers dad). In this AU they were Kings royal Magician and Jester as per usual. They were best friends though and preformed these beautiful displays of magic together. Side by side, hand in hand. They were best friends for years and always dreamed of one day running away together and finding a safe place to live.
Eventually Jevil met someone. Someone who spoke of a way to leave this place. They spoke of walking through your own reflection. And if done right, one could leave their AU entirely.. Jevil believed them out of desperation and tried to tell Seam about it. Seam thought Jevil was losing his mind. Walking through your own reflection? That makes no sense..
King caught wind of them plotting to escape. And as punishment to both of them he commanded Seam to lock Jevil away using his own magic.
In Seams eyes, Jevil was his best friend. His brother, the only thing in this world that he could trust. But he was more afraid of what King would do to him or Jevil for disobeying him, then he was willing to stand up against him. So while believing Jevil was sick in the head and needed help, he acted out of cowardice and sealed Jevil away..
I'm thinking that eventually sometime later, Jevil is able to escape through his own reflection. A mirror. And either he goes back and sees Seam dressed in these beautiful robes and thinks "well the king must be treating him well. Guess I'll just leave him to reap the benefits of betraying me.. >:(" And leaves with a bitter heart. THAT, or he just left. Never going back to check on Seam or see if King was treating him well or not.
So the AU continues. With Jevil traveling from world to world, meeting new people and learning new things.. When eventually he's with the whole gang and they're all sitting in a restaurant or something.
When Jevil suddenly feels this overwhelming sense of doom. Something horrible is about to happen to Seam. He just knows it, its in his bones. Deep within his soul he can feel it. He knows- he needs to save him.
He falls back out of his chair into a mirror and heads straight for his old AU. Showing up just in time to stop Seam from.. well..
They end up talking. Turns out that after Jevil was imprisoned, Seam tried to sneak down to the basement and visit him. He wanted to apologize for imprisoning him and explain himself- but he was caught by King.
"I just wanted to see him!"
"For that I will take your eye."
"NO! Please don't take my eye!!"
"For talking back, I will take your voice too."
King took Seams eye and stitched his mouth shut. He could still talk but not very well. To make things worse, when Jevil escaped? Seam thought he had died. Why wouldn't he? His magical barrier was never broken and Jevil was gone. Surly he must have died somehow.. Meanwhile everyone else was under the impression that Seam let Jevil escape because they were friends.
Seam then suffered greatly for years as punishment for "letting Jevil escape". He was bound by these magical chains made by King. He was abused for years and at this point he had enough. But before he could do anything rash.. Jevil returned.
Jevil then felt the sinking horror realizing that he left Seam alone in this world to be abused by King. He abandoned him. After all those years of promising to one day run away together..
Seam betrayed Jevil, and Jevil abandoned Seam.
After realizing all of this and having a long emotional talk. Seam and Jevil deeply apologized to the other, and forgave each other. Marking the beginning of their new friendship. And despite Seam feeling like he doesn't deserve freedom, he agreed to run away with Jevil and finally be free with him.
~~~~
Now this story is super cool and morbid and all but now I'm questioning the story and wether or not I want it to be canon <XD
I have some other ideas that I really like too and this one is just a biiiiit dark... ish. I mean I've made worse- but idk I guess this one just has a bad taste to it..
I also like the idea that Seam has been with Jevil this whole time and was the first person he saved. Which motivated him to try and save other people and give them the same freedom that he gave to Seam. But then that would change the Grillby fight and Spamton situation a bit and also maybe effect the Goner kid situation- GAH!! I'll figure it out eventually- <XDD
I hope this wasn't too hard to stomach and if you read all the way through I thank you :}} 💖
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teaboot · 10 months
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I used to dream of finding Home.
Somewhere between my tweens and my teens, the house my family lived in stopped feeling like a comfortable pocket where I belonged and started feeling more like a roomshare with strangers.
I'd read a lot of books. A lot of stories about outsiders and misfits who fell into grand adventures that led them into perfect little keyhole they were destined to slide into. I thought that someday, in a much less exciting or eventful way, the same would happen to me. If I worked very hard to be good and kind and forgiving then I'd stumble into Home.
It never happened.
I moved from town to city to country, and didn't find it. Every building felt the same, no matter how long I stayed. None of them felt natural, or easy, or safe.
I was living in a dilapidated loft above a busted-out mortuary when I figured it out.
No running water. No heat. No AC. No furniture or mattress or internet, and a dusty bathroom with a broken toilet and a sink inexplicably pre-filled with cigarette butts, and it finally clicked.
I ripped out the old carpet. Swept the floors. Taped the sun out of the windows with foil and foam and big black garbage bags. Cleaned off an old shelf, stole a cot, piled all my blankets on top of it, painted pictures and taped them to the walls and spray-painted a mural and leaned a tarnished old mirror up against the wall.
I found a room divider in an old office room and took a lamp left out with the trash and set up an empty coffee pot with cheap silk flowers. Hung a shower curtain in the morgue and turned a storage bin into a bath and hooked my towel on a loose nail stuck into the wall.
And when I left, and left everything behind, I found another little empty hole in the world and did it all over again.
That's something I don't think I could have learned from all my stories. It's not something very interesting to read about, some lonely stranger puttering about by themselves in a hot, dark room. But it's important to share it, I think, so I've done my best.
I think that a Place is a beast, and to make it a Home, you have to dig in your claws and fight for it, tooth and nail.
Then, once you've tired it out, string up lights below it's ribcage and pet it nice between the ears until it purrs.
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wileys-russo · 6 months
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manchester is saved II m.earps x reader
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manchester is saved II m.earps x reader
"mumma!" you looked up from your phone, pocketing the device with a wide smile watching your almost six year old son sprint toward you, backpack comically almost as big as he was.
"well hello! someone's had a good day then hm?" you laughed at the huge grin on his face as he waved goodbye to his friends, you sending a smile to some of their parents you knew quite well.
"the best day!" mason beamed, and you couldn't help but melt at how much he looked like your wife when he did so. he had your eyes and the same dirty blonde hair that ran deep in your genes, but his sloped nose, rambunctious laugh and cheeky smile was exactly alike your wife.
"well don't hold out on me, tell me all about it." you demanded as you took his bag from him and he grabbed your hand, swinging it to and fro as the two of you began to walk home, not living very far from the school both you and mary took turns walking him to and from each day.
he began to happily ramble on and on about his day, which you knew he would enjoy given the fact they'd run a sports camp for the kindergarten class for half the day, you having give him very very strict instructions not to lose the permission slip you'd tucked away securely into his bag last week.
"then we have sports day next week! are you and mama coming?" he asked hopefully, looking up at you as you affectionately ran a hand through his shaggy blonde hair, moving it out of his eyes. "of course my love, we'll both be there." you promised as he cheered happily, hugging your leg.
"oh! can i go get mama some flowers?" he gasped, seeing a few wild daises growing in a clump on the nature strip, sprinting off after you nodded. you leaned against the front gate of your house with his backpack in hand, watching on carefully as the five year old squatted down.
you couldn't help but laugh quietly to yourself at the way his tongue stuck out of the corner of his mouth, eyebrows knitted into a frown exactly mirroring mary's own concentrating face as his eyes wandered the clumps of flowers in front of him.
you and your wife were both fiercely protective over the boy ever since he'd blessed the two of you coming into the world. you'd tried IVF three times until finally on what you'd both agreed would be the final run you'd fallen pregnant.
it wasn't an easy birth with mason coming out feet first, and a grueling ten hour labour had you demanding any and all drugs they'd give you, snapping your wifes head off anytime her lips curled up in amusement, cursing her out over and over as you'd almost broken her hand squeezing it so hard.
but you'd done it and the moment you both laid eyes on him felt a surge of love different to anything you'd experienced before, and in that moment you and your wife made a silent promise that no matter what you would never let a soul harm so much as a hair on his head.
though mary had always been the more over protective out of the two of you, especially since mason had always been quite soft spoken and sensitive, taking after you in that sense.
he was a perfectly happy child, always with a beaming smile on his face and refusing to let either of you cut his hair meaning it hung down just past his shoulder blades, often tied back into a loose bun to keep it out of his eyes.
but as much as he loved to run around and climb trees, scraping his knees and coming home covered in dirt or leaves, he also found immense joy in letting you paint his nails, or allowing one of his aunties to braid his hair, and you and mary made no move to discourage any of it.
though you did have to step in when he decided he wanted to wear his underwear outside of his clothes to his school one day and you'd made him change. taking the bad cop role that day your heart broke as afterwards he ran crying to mary, the older girl sending you an empathetic smile as she rocked him back and forth.
but his soft and caring nature had meant once he was old enough to talk mary had made sure to constantly affirm and build up his own self confidence, making sure he knew how to stand up for himself despite your fussing that he would be fine, your wife forever worried he would be picked on for being that little bit different.
the goal keeper was a nervous wreck his first day of school, overthinking every little possibility that something would happen. you did everything in your power to try and assure her that though he took after you he was still her son, and had her same hard headed determination to any task he set his mind to.
to your collective relief even if more shy in nature, school brought him further out of his shell, turning him into quite the little social butterfly, you and mary needing to get him his own calendar for the fridge to keep track of the multitude of birthday parties, play dates and outings he was invited on.
"come on mase!" you called out, shaking your head with a smile as he struggled to choose which flowers to pick, the boy glancing over to you and sending a thumbs up, quickly pulling out a small handful. you laughed as he also grabbed a fistful of weeds, tucking them in with his little bouquet and racing back over to you.
"i couldn't choose what ones, didn't want to hurt the other flowers feelings." he huffed as you smiled, opening the gate as he ran past you and up the driveway. "careful please!" you warned as he took the front steps two at a time, your breath catching as he stumbled but fixed his footing, waiting for you patiently by the front door.
"bang your shoes please babe." you nodded as he stomped his feet, shaking off the excess dirt and you unlocked the door. you took the flowers from him and hung his bag up as he sat down on the floor and pulled his shoes off.
mary's car not yet in the driveway you knew she wasn't home, much to masons disappointment as he ran a lap of the house calling out for her until you reminded on tuesdays and thursdays she arrived home after he did, the boy nodding with a sigh.
knowing the way to his heart was the same as your wife you proposed some food, tilting his head back and kissing his forehead as he sat at the table and you placed a colouring book in front of him.
placing his flowers in a cup of water you busied yourself making him a sandwich, waiting patiently as he ticked over and over trying to decide what he wanted. "half and half? mama can have the same when she gets home." you offered as he nodded happily, attention dropping back down to his colouring.
making two sandwiches, one ham and cheese and the other with turkey you cut them in half, placing two halves aside for your wife. "bbq or prawn cocktail?" you asked holding up two packets of crisps, your son pointing to those in your left hand.
placing a handful onto his plate alongside some cut up strawberries you put everything away, mason asking if he could watch some tv as you nodded, helping him down and following after him. setting his plate down on the coffee table you clicked onto his favourite show and left him to it.
you glanced to the time with a slight frown, mary normally home no later than four. with a shrug you helped yourself to the sandwich you'd made her, placing away everything you'd used as you heard her keys in the front door.
"only me!" she yelled out letting herself in, a thump telling you she'd dropped her kit bag by the door making you roll your eyes at the small habit you were constantly telling her off for. "in here!" you called back, mason's head shooting up as he hurried to his feet.
"you're home!" he launched at mary the moment she rounded the corner, the tall girl grunting as his body rammed into her legs and she stumbled for a moment before catching her balance. "hello handsome, i missed ya!" mary grinned, pulling him up into her arms and kissing all over his face as he whined and tried to push her off.
"yeah she's gross isn't she mase." you teased sticking your tongue out making him giggle as your wife let him down and he raced back off to finish his show. "forever the charmer aren't you darling." mary rolled her eyes playfully, moving to press your body against the fridge, just out of sight of your son.
"stuck with me now." you grinned holding up your wedding ring as your wife pulled you into a kiss, mumbling that was exactly how she wanted it. "you're home late?" you questioned as she let you go, pecking your lips a few more times and pushing off of you.
"had to drop tooney home her car shit itself again!" mary rolled her eyes as you smacked her shoulder and nodded to the five year old within earshot. "sorry gorgeous." the girl smiled guiltily, you forever warning her about her language in front of mason, who was in the phase of repeating everything and anything.
you'd both found that out the hard way the other morning.
"good morning beautiful." your wife had sauntered into the kitchen, playfully smacking your bum as she breezed past you toward the coffee machine. "watch it earps." you'd warned playfully, flipping over the pancakes as she stuck her tongue out at you.
"good girl mumma!" your head snapped down toward your son who now stood beside you, looking up at you with his disheveled bed hair and a smile, hugging your leg.
"what did you just say love?" mary frowned as he climbed up to sit at the table across from her. "good girl! mummas a good girl." he repeated making your eyes widen as they locked with marys, which only twinkled with slight amusement.
"why do you say that mase?" mary asked, running a hand through his hair in an attempt to de-tangle it. "you said it mama, heard you this morning when you and mumma were wrestling." he chirped, busying himself playing with one of his toy cars, driving it along the table and making noises with his mouth as you choked on air in surprise at his words.
"i'm going to kill you." you mouthed seriously toward the smirking older girl, who'd been insistent your son wasn't awake when she'd had her way with you this morning, far too eager to get up and lock the door despite your worries.
dumping masons pancakes onto a plate you moved to place them in front of him once you'd cut them up, gently removing the toy car from his hand and giving him a fork.
"thanks sexy!" the boy grinned, repeating marys exact words she'd just spoke as you handed her her coffee a few seconds prior. "mase no, thats an adult word okay? you do not say whatever mama says." you'd warned sternly as he'd only shrugged, too busy devouring his pancakes.
safe to say you and mary hadn't wrestled for quite a while after that, much to her utter displeasure.
"oh thank you." you smiled as your son ran into the kitchen and handed you his now empty plate which you stacked in the dishwasher. "mama! those are for you, i picked them." he beamed pointing to the daises on the counter, marys entire face melting.
"oh mase, baby they're beautiful. thank you!" mary grinned, affectionately touching the flowers before bending down to wrap him in a tight hug. "tell mama about your day mase!" you nodded encouragingly as mary picked him up and sat him up on the counter.
he gestured his hands around wildly as he spoke making you smile as you watched on, mary over-acting her facial expressions to make sure he knew she was just as engaged in his story telling, taking a quick photo with your phone and tucking it back your pocket.
you stepped out of the room for a moment, retreating to your bedroom and changing, taking off your bra and sighing in relief as you swapped from jeans into a pair of joggers, tugging one of your wifes england hoodies on over the top.
though as you returned to the kitchen it seemed your timing was somewhat perfect to hear the one sentence you never thought you'd hear uttered in the earps household.
"and i was striker! and i'm gonna be striker on wednesday for sports day." mason beamed as you stopped in your tracks, watching marys face fall for a moment before she slapped a fake smile on, nodding through the pain in her eyes.
"hey mase? can you go and tidy up your toys on the floor of your room please." you called out, your son nodding as mary helped him down, slumping against the counter as he disappeared and you checked he was out of earshot.
"oh my love." you held back the urge to smile, opening your arms as the taller girl collapsed into them, chin resting on your shoulder as she let out a deep and troubled sigh. "a fucking striker. my own son!"
"mary." you warned, rubbing her back and feeling her huff. "there is goal keeping trophies, gears, posters, all around this house! and now he wants to be a fucking striker." mary unwrapped herself from you, pulling herself to sit up on the counter with a scowl.
"at least he wants to play?" you tried, moving to stand between her legs with your hands resting on her knees. "i'd rather he not play than be a bloody striker! no son of mine isn't going to follow in his mothers footsteps." mary shook her head firmly, a smile curling onto your lips.
"baby you can't force him to be a goal keeper." you laughed as she only scoffed. "i can and i will! just you watch." mary challenged, pushing you away with her foot and jumping down, calling out for mason.
"mary alexandra earps, you leave him be." you warned, your wife waving you off as your son appeared. "shall we go to the park and kick a football?" mary offered, mason nodding happily before he ran off to grab his shoes at her request.
"you are unbelievable."
~
you sat on a picnic blanket watching on with your arms crossed as your wife tried any and every way she could to sway masons mind.
"isn't this more fun?" mary cheered as she softly kicked the ball toward mason, makeshift goal set up using a few sticks to mark the posts as he shook his head, refusing to even move and try to stop it as it rolled past him.
"i wanna kick it!" he huffed, stamping his feet and flaring his nostrils, alerting you he was dangerously close to a meltdown. "mary!" you called out, raising your eyebrows as she waved you off.
"you do kick it! but only if you stop it, like i showed you before. try again!" she raced over to grab the ball, pausing to re-tie masons hair which had slipped out of the loose bun it was tied back into given the amount of times he'd furiously shaken his head at her.
you sighed with a shake of your own head, flopping down onto your back and closing your eyes, the warm rays of an impending sunset bathing your face. "yeah! like that." mary cheered as mason stopped the ball, but not before he kicked it hard as he could in the other direction and raced over toward you.
you grunted as he landed on top of you, tucking his head into your neck. "mama won't let me kick." he mumbled as you moved a hand to rub his back, sitting up and shooting your wife a stern look as she huffed and kicked at the ground like a scolded child.
"okay, sit up for me please mase." you gently pulled him away from you, setting him down to sit in your lap as he looked up at you with a frown. "don't do that, if the wind changes your face gets stuck like that forever!" you teased, smoothing out his eyebrows with your thumbs.
"can you do something for me?" he nodded at your words and you glanced over his shoulder to see mary lost in thought, staring away into the distance with a troubled look on her face. "you know how we go and watch mama play football yeah? in the big stadiums." he nodded again.
"well mama is a goal keeper. so strikers are like her bad guy, like how all superheros have a villian." you started. "like batman and riddler?" you now nodded at your sons words.
"but only when she's playing! its like pretend, all a big game. like when aunty lessi kicks the ball at mama and tries to get it in the goal? mama and aunty lessi are still best friends after the game right?" he nodded again.
"so why don't you ask mama if she'll take turns with you? you be the striker and then it's her turn, but you can't let her score when she's striker! otherwise the bad guys win." you smirked, tickling at his sides as he giggled but nodded, jumping off and running back toward mary.
you watched on as mary squatted down beside your son, holding his hands as the boy did his best to recount what you'd just told him, the smile returning to her face as she nodded happily at his words.
you knew this was only the start of a very long battle, knowing your wife well enough that this was only a band aid solution to the inevitability she would do anything in her power to have mason earps be the next big goal keeping name.
you laid back down in the sun grabbing your wifes sunglasses where they sat on the ground and slipping them on, the sounds of your families laughter causing a soft smile to curl onto your lips.
however your lack of watching had meant you'd missed mary call over your son and whisper something in his ear, the two of them growing bored of football and advancing toward you. "get her!" your eyes shot open at that as you pushed the sunglasses up onto your head just in time to see mason jump on top of you, mary following suit.
"no! no no no please." you begged as both your wife and sons fingers jabbed into your sides, your body thrashing as mary held you down with a grin, your laughter filling the air as masons own little giggles joined in.
"manchester is saved mase, bad guy defeated!" mary high fived the blonde as the two of them finally ceased their attack, mason running off to kick the ball as you struggled to catch your breath.
"never gets old." mary grinned cheekily, hovering over you and sweetly pecking your lips a few times as you shook your head and flipped her off, still trying to recover.
"just you wait till i call less and let her know her godsons choosing to follow in her footsteps instead of his own mothers!" you teased once you could speak again. "don't you dare." mary warned as she sat beside you, a beat of silence falling between you before you grabbed your phone and jumped to your feet.
"traitor! get her mason!" mary yelled after you as your son dropped the football in his hands and chased after you with a grin, mary quickly packing everything up into a bag.
"mama!" she glanced up as mason gestured toward you as you darted past her, mary easily grabbing you by the waist and tossing you over her shoulder.
"mary!" you laughed, smacking her back as she slung the bag over her free shoulder, taking masons hand as you shook your head, accepting the fact you were being carried home.
"manchester is saved once again!"
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thetriumphantpanda · 9 months
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i'm not the only one | joel & tommy miller
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Summary | You have your baby. You have your family. But can you really have everything you want? Can you really have your cake and eat it too?
Warnings | Fluff, mentions of breastfeeding, small children (in my world they need to come with a warning because ew), let's say it one more time for old times sake: TOMMY GETTING CUCKED BECAUSE HE LOVES IT, dirty talk, fingering (f) and allusions to other smut.
Word Count | 1.9k
Authors Note | Wow. I just wanted to take some time to say a huge thank you to everyone who has read and supported me through this little fic. What started as a filthy little one-shot has become something super special to me. I'm so proud with how this turned out and I really hope that you love this ending as much as I do. I need to say a massive thank you to the JFC - @cavillscurls @dinsdjrn @morning-star-joy @cupofjoel @tightjeansjavi @sinsofsummers for continuously losing their mind over this fic with me and helping me come up with the ending where no-one gets their heart broken, I love you girls more than I can express 🧡 Thank you to each and every person who has read this, has given me their love, interacted with me and generally just made me the happiest girl for deciding to come back to fic writing. You're all awesome and I love each and every one of you. Please let me know what you thought of this, either by commenting, reblogging or sending me some love in my ask box, and if you'd like to support me with a donation, you can do so over on Ko-Fi.
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The late September sun is still warm, even as it begins dipping below the horizon, painting the sky a beautiful mix of pink and orange. The beer in your bottle is lukewarm, but you finish it off anyway, attention dropping to your son, sat on your knee, as you bounce it up and down to keep him occupied at the table. He’s just turned two and is a much better table companion at Joel’s birthday cook-out than he had been last year. He’s starting to show a little personality, babbling along when Sarah tried to talk to him, teasing Tommy when he hands his son a toy, throwing it to the ground because he already knows he’ll pick it right back up and play along. 
Everyone else has long gone by this point in the evening. This year’s celebration of Joel’s birthday being held at your house because he’s having his garden landscaped. It’s just the five of you, the people who matter most to you in life, sat around, finishing drinks and just enjoying each other’s company. Sarah yawns to your left, the day finally catching up with her. 
“You tired, bug?” Joel asks, smoothing a hand over her hair. 
“I’m not tired.” But she yawns again, chuckles erupting from the table. 
You poke at her arm, “Your room is ready whenever you are.” It had already been agreed that Sarah and Joel would stay here tonight, so he could have a drink and enjoy his birthday without worrying about driving home. 
To her credit, she lasts another hour sat at the table, but once Joshua starts fussing as well, it’s clear it’s time for everyone to call it a night. Joel kisses Sarah on the forehead, wishing her a goodnight as she heads inside. Tommy takes Joshua from your arms and presses a kiss to the top of your head, leaving you and Joel together for the first time that evening. You reach out your arm across the table, palm up to the darkening sky, Joel’s own, much larger hand, slipping into it. 
“Shall we go?” You ask, the smile across your face mirroring his own. 
“I think we should.” 
As you’re walking through the neighbourhood your mind drags back to this time last year and the conversation with Tommy as Joel’s birthday loomed on the horizon. 
“What do you think we should get him for his birthday?” Tommy asked, flipping through the catalogue of construction gear that comes through the letterbox every few months, “He was saying his toolbox is too small these days, maybe we can get him a bigger one?” 
Joshua is cradled against your chest, suckling as you feed him. You’d always wondered how the other women you knew could multitask before he’d been born. One of your best friends could breastfeed her child, cook dinner and talk to her older daughter all at the same time. Now, standing in the kitchen feeding your son, two pans on the stovetop as you cook, holding a conversation with Tommy, you realise it just came naturally. 
“I mean, we can,” You throw over your shoulder, “But I think that man deserves more than a toolbox for his birthday.” 
Once Joshua has finished feeding, you hand him to Tommy, along with placing a rag over his shoulder – you fed him, Tommy gets to burp him, that’s the deal. 
“I just feel bad,” You comment, going back to pushing the steak around the pan, “Do you not feel like you’ve kinda just abandoned him a little?” 
“What do you mean?” Tommy asks, patting his son on the back. 
You sigh, trying to focus on cooking as you speak, “I just mean that he did this for us, gave us this life we have now, and what are we going to do to thank him? Give him a toolbox? Just seems like we don’t care.” 
“Well, what would you suggest?” He asks, you're quiet in response, trying to think of how best to put this, "You miss him, don't you?" He finally asks.
You turn around, leaning against the counter to the side of the stove, “I do miss him,” You say simply, not afraid to admit it, “You said before Joshua was born that you understood the connection we have, I just want to give him something good.” 
Tommy has Joshua cradled in his arms now, trying to get him to go to sleep so he can lie him down and enjoy dinner with you in peace, "You wanna fuck him for his birthday?" There's a smirk on his lips, just like there was when you'd needed Joel before Joshua was born.
“Hey, language!” You chastise, pointing to his son in his arms, “Don’t say it like that either, you know you come first, you always have, I love you Tommy, but can’t we just give him one time, once a year, where I can really show him how grateful I am for what he gave us?” 
You can see him mull it over in his mind as he bounces his son in his arms before he relents, “Okay,” He’s smiling, and it reaches his eyes, so you know he really means it, “If that’s what you want, I’m happy.” 
You smile, walking over to kiss him, “I don’t deserve you,” You murmur against his lips, “I love you so very much, Tommy Miller.” 
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Joel thinks, as he walks hand in hand with you back to his home, that he really didn’t need this. He didn’t need thanking for what he’d done. He remembers walking into your hospital room with Sarah after Joshua had been born – she’d insisted on picking the biggest and brightest bouquet of flowers for you and had been so excited to finally meet her nephew. He’d pushed open the door for her that day and had been overcome with a strange sense of satisfaction. 
You were propped up in bed, Joshua cradled in your arms, his tiny hand clutched around one of your fingers, Tommy stood, hand brushing your hair as he looked down at the both of you with pure adoration. He knew he’d given you everything in that moment, that he’d managed to make the two of you the happiest people ever, and that was enough. A fleeting moment in time between you and him, that had created the most beautiful baby boy he’d ever laid eyes on, he’d been happy to let it lie, to wait and see if you wanted more and came back to him down the line. 
He hadn’t expected that on his birthday last year, you’d have cornered him and kissed him with such passion that he wasn’t sure he’d survive once he pulled away from you. Then you explained, one night a year, he could choose when, where you could show him how thankful you were to him. A night just to yourselves, without Tommy’s eyes trailing over you both. Secret and sacred between the two of you. 
Once Joel has unlocked his front door and brought you inside, he wastes no time. He craves this, has spent the last year thinking of the moment he gets to fuse his lips with yours. It’s soft, as his mouth opens against yours, slow as your tongues meet, he doesn’t have to rush with you anymore, he gets you to himself for the whole night. He pulls away, pressing his forehead to yours. 
“Hey.” You smile softly. 
“Hey, pretty girl,” He’s smiling, palms resting at your hips, “You want me to take you upstairs? 
You bite at your bottom lip and breathe out, “Yes.” 
He leads you up the stairs, your hand clutched in his own, through the threshold of his bedroom. He settles himself on top of his sheets, head propped up on his pillows as he motions you to join him. You clamber onto the bed, crawling up his body on your hands and knees until you’re straddling his hips with your mouth back on his. 
As you grind your hips down onto him, his hands coming to cup your ass under your dress, you can feel him growing hard for you. All you want is to strip him down and put your mouth on him, but it seems he has other ideas, and since this is all for him, you let him take the lead. He slips his hands under the waistband of your panties, warm hands on your flesh as he pulls them down as far as they’ll go in this position. 
“Lie down for me, babygirl.” He whispers against your lips, you oblige, settling yourself down on your back as he pulls your underwear off fully, shucking the hem of your dress up to your hips. 
He’s got one of his arms under your head, his lips at your ear as you spread your legs for him, letting his fingers slip through your folds to gather the slick that has slowly been gathering there all evening as you both watched each other, knowing what was coming. 
“So wet for me, pretty girl,” He breathes into your ear, taking the lobe between his teeth to nibble as he slips two of his fingers into your tight pussy, “Been thinking about me?” 
He drags those fingers from your core, up to your clit where he begins to play soft circles across it, it’s so gentle that your breath catches in your throat as you arch yourself into his hand, “Couldn’t stop,” You admit, turning your face to kiss his lips, “Thought about you all day.” 
He dips his fingers back into your cunt as he kisses you, you can feel him smirk against your lips when you grind down to meet his fingers, “I’ve been thinking about you all year, hot mama, couldn’t wait to get my hands on you.” 
He brings his slick fingers back up to your swollen bundle of nerves, showering it with attention as you whimper for him, arching your back and bucking your hips, fingers gripping at his arm as he works you to the crest. You come for him, moaning into his mouth as he kisses you, his fingers making sure they work you for every ounce of your orgasm. 
Joel has you more times than he can count that night. He brings you over the edge over and over again until you can do nothing but sob, beg for a reprieve but beg him not to stop. You let him put you in positions you didn’t know possible, his cock thick and heavy inside you, brushing that spot within you that makes you sing and scream for him. He fills you up with his cum, protected by the pill you take each morning, and then, when the sun is rising and the beginnings of the day break through his drawn curtains, you lie on his chest, fingers drawing patterns on his skin, slick with sweat. You’re both sore, both spent, and both happy, most importantly. You know that within the hour you’ll have to start the walk back to your own home and it’ll be like nothing ever happened. Sarah will think her dad slept on your couch and you were in your rightful place, in bed next to Tommy, and that's how it will continue to be for another year, happy with the man you love, but safe in the knowledge that you still have this slice of heaven each year. The play will continue for another year – the doting uncle and niece, the happy family with their growing son, and you’ll be happy, because this is all you’ve ever needed. 
“I love you.” Joel whispers, lips pressing a kiss to your forehead as he brushes the sweat slicked hair from your face, his eyes mapping every inch of you, claiming this scene as his own, committing it to memory so he has one thing he can think of, in the depths of his nights, when he feels the loneliest. To remind him that he’s not lonely at all, because even if he can only have you once a year, at least he can have you. He’s a simple man and he’s happy to take this one moment with you, until you decide you want more from him, if that’s ever the case. 
“I love you too Joel.” 
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buckys-metal-arm · 4 days
Text
The Man in the Mirror
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Bucky x GN!Reader
Description: When a bad nightmare leads to you finding Bucky in the bathroom with a pair of scissors in his hand, you offer to help him recognize himself in the mirror
Warnings: fluff and angst, Hurt/Comfort, haircuts, facial shaving, gratuitous use of pet names, Bucky’s trauma, HYDRA abuse/torture, mentions of blood, mentions of… forced haircuts I guess? I dunno if that’s a warning but there it is
A/N: I think we as a society need more “Bucky gets a haircut” fanfic in the world, so here’s my 2 cents
((18+ only below the cut please and thank you!!))
It was the scream that woke you up
You groggily reached your hand out to the other side of the bed, searching for Bucky’s warmth
 But it was  empty
You noticed the bathroom light was on, and had knocked on the door, calling out to him
When he didn’t respond, you had decided to let yourself in
“Baby, I’m gonna open the door, okay?” You called softly before opening the door.
You weren’t entirely sure what you expected to walk in on.
But a shattered bathroom mirror and your boyfriend leaned over the bathroom counter, his Vibranium hand gripping the marble, a pair of scissors clenched in his other was not one of them
“Oh my God, Bucky!” You quickly grabbed your slippers and slid them on, rushing to his side, “what happened?”
 You grabbed his right hand, removing what you now saw to be a pair of scissors as gently as possible
“Are you okay?” You began to search his body for injury, “Honey, what happened?”
Bucky didn’t respond.
His glassy eyes met yours, looking at you but not really seeing youYou took his face in both hands, leaning your forehead against his and gently stroking his cheekbones
“It’s alright, Baby,” you cooed, brushing his hair out of his eyes and tucking it behind his ear, “it’s okay, Bucky, you're safe, Sweet Boy…” 
His breathing slowly started to even out as you continued to hush him, slowly starting to come back to you.
 “Doll?” He asked in a quiet, broken voice that broke your heart.
 “I'm here, Honey,” you wrapped your arms around him, cradling his head against your shoulder, “I'm here, it's okay…” 
He’d sobbed into your neck as you held him, rocking him back and forth and rubbing his back
“It’s alright Sweetheart,” you’d cooed, pressing little kisses against his temple, “you’re alright, it’s okay…”
When he’d finally calmed down, Bucky told you about the nightmare that had sent him into this spiral, the vivid flashbacks of HYDRA’s torture
“It felt so fucking real, Doll.” Bucky’s voice shook. You hugged him a little closer, “they had these…taser things. Cattle prods, really. They– they would jam them into my sides for hours. And I swear I could feel it. When they decided they'd had their fun I felt them grab me by the hair and start dragging me, they used to do that a lot. I woke up before they could toss me into the Chair.”
“Oh… oh, Bucky,” you whispered, running your fingers through his hair, “oh, baby…”
“I tried not to think about it,” he whimpered, “I just went to go splash some water on my face, but when I looked in the mirror all I could see was the Soldier and I couldn't take it.”
He motioned to the scissors, “I tried to take care of it myself, but I couldn't stop fucking shaking.”
You hugged him close, “oh, Baby. I’m sorry…”
 “I just… I can’t keep my hair like this,” he said, hiding his face your neck, “I can’t keep seeing the Soldier every time I look in the fucking mirror.”
 “I know, Baby, I know,” you told him, “how about this, help me clean up the glass, and then I’ll cut your hair after, okay?”
 “I think I want to shave too,” Bucky replied, “could you…?”
“Of course, Honey.” 
Cleaning up the glass was quick, so you sent him to get the kitchen ready while you grabbed the supplies
 You found him in the kitchen, seated in a chair and twiddling his thumbs You kissed his cheek and draped an old towel around his shoulders, setting down the things in your hands. 
“I thought I could start by putting it in a ponytail and cutting the length off,” you explained, “then maybe trim the top and then clean it up with the clippers. Does that sound good?”
 He nodded, and you began to comb your fingers through his long locks, gathering it up to put in a hair tie. He hummed at the feeling of your hands in his hair. 
“Did I ever tell you about my first few decades at HYDRA?” Bucky asked as you finished the ponytail, his eyes not meeting yours.
 You shook your head, confused.
 “They shaved my head for a long time. Sanitary reasons. I didn’t really get a lot of chances to shower. It’s easier to keep your hair clean if you don’t have any,” his blue eyes focused on the ground, “I guess it was for medical reasons too. They always had things stuck on my head in the early days.”
Bucky took a deep, shaky breath.
“I hated it. They would always cut it before tossing me in the Chair,” he continued, “it felt like I was being fucking scalped. They had to hold me down, I fought them every time. ”
You wrapped him in a tight hug, “I’m sorry.”
“I’ve been letting my hair grow out because I couldn’t stand the idea of that again,” he murmured into your shirt, “bad memories and all.”
“I won’t hurt you,” you promised him, “I won’t ever hurt you. I promise Buck, you’re safe here.” 
“I know, Doll. I know,” Bucky took a deep breath,“we should get started. Before I lose my nerve.”
You nodded, straightening up and grabbing the scissors, “can I make the first cut?”
“Yeah,” he straightened up in the chair a bit, “Go ahead.”
He sucked in a breath as you carefully snipped off the chocolate colored ponytail, holding it out for him to see once it was off
“Good job, Sweetheart.” You smiled, “first cut’s done. Do you want to keep going?”
Bucky stared wide eyed at what you’d cut off, “I didn’t realize it had gotten this long… Uh, yeah. You can keep going.”
 You hummed and continued.
He was doing so good, keeping so still for you as you worked. 
“You’re doing so well, Honey. I’m so proud of you,” you pressed a kiss to his cheek, “I’m gonna use the clippers now, is that alright?”
 Bucky nodded, closing his eyes and resting his head against your stomach
He flinched away hard when he heard the clippers buzz on, despite your warning about the noise.
 When HYDRA had shaved him they’d used manual clippers, raking them along his skull with little care. 
It felt foolish, but on some level he’d forgotten those weren’t the standard anymore. 
You switched the device off immediately and rubbed his shoulder, trying to give him what little comfort you could
“You okay?”You asked, “talk to me, Bucky-Baby.”
“The…the…” he stammered, shifting on the seat, unable to articulate what was in his head.
That the buzzing was loud in his ears, bringing him back to a hand dragging him towards a room he knew too well, to metal clamping down on either side of his face and screaming as his mind was torn away from him. 
“The buzzing,” he finally forced out, “The Chair…”
You nodded, understanding.
 “You’re not back there,” you whispered, stepping in front of him and holding his face with both hands, “you’re home with me. I won’t hurt you, I won’t let anyone hurt you, Buck.”
Bucky nodded, taking a deep breath. 
“I know, I know you won’t,” he assured you, taking a deep breath and forcing himself to calm down, “just… just do it. I’m ready.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I’m ready, I’m okay.”
You kept a hand on his shoulder, “okay Baby. Deep breath, okay?”
He obeyed, and you kept your free hand on him as you carefully cut away his soft hair.
“You’re doing so good, Sweet Boy,” you cooed as you gently trimmed his sideburns, Bucky tensing at how loud the buzzing was, “it’s alright, you’re alright…” 
You switched off the clippers once you’d finished, running your fingers through his shorn locks, loose bits of hair falling down his back and onto the tile.
 “There we go,” you stood in front of him, holding his face, “your hair is all done, Sweetheart. Do you still want to shave?” 
He nodded, and you grabbed his shaving cream.
You sat down on his lap and Bucky instinctively wrapped his arms around your waist
 You began to carefully rub the cream onto his face, planting a little peck to the tip of his nose, earning you a little smile.
 Once his face was sufficiently lathered, you grabbed his razor and smiled softly
“Ready?” You asked.
He nodded, and you began to carefully shave his face. 
Bucky was shocked by how gentle you were with him, moving his face as you needed with only the tips of your fingers and pressing little kisses to each patch of smooth skin that was revealed
Once you were done, you gently patted his face dry with a towel and applying his aftershave.
“Very handsome, Sweetheart.” You smiled, gently tilting his face from side to side, inspecting your work.
“You really think so?” Bucky asked with anxious eyes. 
“Of course I think so. Why don’t you take a look?”
The mirror is still broken so you held your phone up with the camera opening, allowing him to see himself.
You watched him examine his new look
 He chewed his lip, staring at the short hair, the clean-shaven face.
“What do you see, Buck?” You asked, his silence making you nervous.
“I… I see me…” his right hand reached up and touched his own cheek, “I see me…”
You smiled softly, cupping his face and lightly stroking his smooth skin, “you look so good, baby.” 
Bucky hugged you tightly to him, and you leaned your head against his collarbone.
“Thank you,” he murmured into your hair, “thank you so much.”
“Any time, Buck.” You stood up, taking his hand, “c’mon, Honey, why don’t we get you some rest?”
 “But what about the mess?”
“It’ll still be there in the morning.”
You guided him back to your bed and pulled him into your arms, his head on your chest.
 You ran your fingers through his hair, so much shorter but still just as soft.
Bucky smiled softly up at you, and you cupped his cheek 
“I’ll miss the beard a bit, I’ll be honest,” you murmured, stroking your thumb along his cheekbone.
“Thought you might,” Bucky chuckled, remembering how often you touched his scruffy cheeks, “maybe I’ll let some stubble grow in, give you something to run your hand over.”
“I’ll love you no matter what you do. You’ll always be the most handsome man in the room to me,” you kissed his lips softly.
“Thank you,” he whispered when you pulled back, taking your hand and kissing your knuckles, “for helping me look like me again.” 
You smiled, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he settled back down in your arms.
“Of course, Bucky.”
A/N: this guy might get pulled and edited/rewritten at some point. I'm not sure how I feel about it quite yet, I feel like there's a lot unnecessary stuff in here. I dunno, we'll see what the reception is. I hope you enjoyed 💜💙
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thewalkingthread · 6 months
Text
"He's Mine" - R.G.
pairing: rick grimes x f!reader
summary: s4 ep16. Joe's group finds you in the woods. reader is the one targeted instead of Carl
warnings: cursing, angst, mentions of sexual assault, blood, gore
a/n: this scene is my Roman Empire
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You were tired, exhausted from the day's journey. It's been three days since the attack at the prison. Three days since you've seen most of your family. You were lucky enough to have found Rick and Carl after everything went down, even luckier when Michonne came knocking on the front door of the house you were hiding out in.
It was nighttime now, you sat in the front seat of a rundown truck while Carl laid down in the backseat. It was unlikely that you'd get much sleep being so vulnerable in the open right now but Rick and Michonne insisted that you get some rest.
Your eyes stayed on the pair as they sat on a log off the side of the road. Every so often Rick would look into the truck, his eyes locking on yours before he returned back to his conversation with Michonne.
Things with Rick has always been a bit confusing for the both of you. It was clear from the moment you met that there was something there between you. Of course, nothing ever came out of it. He was married and desperately trying to fix the brokenness in his family.
Now that Lori has passed, it's been even weirder. Neither one of you wanted to make the first move and burst the safety bubble you were in, in terms of friendship. Nonetheless, you both knew you cared for one another deeply.
Your eyes dart to the woods when you see movement. Your heart drops as you see a few men creeping in the trees, eyes directly on Rick and Michonne. You knew what was about to happen. You weighed your options. You could scream and warn them, but you had no idea how many of them there were, nor do you know their intentions.
You guys are incredibly unarmed, nothing good would come out of this.
"Carl." You mumble quietly, trying not to make it obvious that you weren't alone in the truck. You have no idea how many of them are our there, no idea how many people were looking at you right now.
Carl stirred and grumbled slightly at your call, you shush him immediately.
"Carl, I need you to very slowly and quietly lay down on the floor of the truck. Keep the blanket over you completely." You mumble. "There are people surrounding us. I need you to hide until me or your dad tell you to come out. Do you understand me?" Your heart raced as you saw the men creep out from the treeline.
Carl quietly did what you said. "Y/N? What's happening?" He was scared. Carl tries his best to keep up with his dad and be a man, but he's still just a boy. It's a scary world now.
"Everything will be okay. Stay hidden, no matter what you hear, okay? Promise me." Your breathe hitched.
"I promise."
That was the last thing he said before one of the men shoved his gun against Rick's temple. You jumped in your seat as another man smacked on the window next to you. You tried your best to avoid glancing back at Carl.
The man grinned at you through the mirror, the creepiest grin you've ever seen. You couldn't hear what the other men were saying to Rick, but eventually a few more men came into view.
The creep tapped on the window, licking his lips as he stared.
Daryl strolled up to the group, it looked like they knew each other?
"Joe!" Daryl yelled, giving a name to the mystery man. You could tell he was trying to talk down the man that held a gun to Rick's head. It looked like whatever Daryl was saying was working, the man still held his gun against Rick but it looked like he was thinking about what Daryl was saying. All hope and relief you felt when your eyes met his vanished when two men grabbed Daryl, punching and kicking him.
Your heart drops as the other man throws Michonne to the ground. The door of the truck swings open and you pray that Carl is brave enough to be silent.
The man grabs you roughly, pulling you out of the truck before patting you down and throwing your pocket knife a few feet away. You fought to wiggle out of his grip but he pushed you against the ground faster than you could blink.
"Shhh.." He says into your ear. "We're gonna have some fun, sweets."
"Leave her be!" You could hear Rick yell over all the commotion. The grunts of Daryl filled your ears as he got punched and kicked only a few feet away from you.
The man on top of you was chuckling as you tried to fight him off, clawing at him and squirming to get out from underneath him.
"Listen, it was me. It was just me." Rick grumbles to Joe.
"See, now that's right. That's not some damn lie." Joe chuckles. "Look, we can settle this. We're reasonable men."
"Get off of me you sick bastard!" You shout, spitting at the man. His hands found it's way to your chest and you screamed as he touched you.
"First, we're going to beat Daryl to death. Then the girl. Then when Dan finishes having his fun with that one over there, we'll all have a turn." The smugness in his voice was deafening.
"Then I'm going to shoot you and then we'll be square." Laughter leaves Joe's body.
"Let her go." Rick says again, as your being turned onto your stomach.
You wanted to cry as Dan pressed your face into the dirt. The pain was forgotten as the sound of his belt buckle clanking rang through your ears.
"This is going to be a whole lot worse for you if you don't stop fighting." Dan grunts into your ear, pressing against your butt. Sobs begin to leave your mouth as reality of what was about to happen sets in.
There was no hope.
The man tugs at your jeans, trying to pull them down.
A gun fires. Everyone seems to pause for a moment. Dan stops for a moment and you take the opportunity to look up, praying that none of you were hit by the bullet.
You see Rick take a swing at Joe before Joe hits him right back, knocking him to the ground. Dan immediately goes back to what he was doing, trying to rip your clothes off of you. You reach for you pocket knife that was just out of reach.
Your cries filled at air when Dan pins you down once again.
"What the hell are you gonna do now, sport?"
Then a squelching sound fills the air before a body thuds to the ground. This time everyone freezes in surprise. You look back at Rick to see him completely covered in blood from his nose to his chest. He spits out blood and skin and your eyes fall onto Joe's limp body on the ground, blood gushing out of his throat.
Fuck.
Michonne doesn't waste a beat as she grabs a gun and shoots the guy holding her before taking out the ones that held Daryl.
Dan is on his feet in seconds once he realizes he's the only one left. He pulls you up, pressing against you as he holds a knife to your throat.
"I'll kill her. I'll- I'll kill her!" He shouts as Michonne points the gun at him.
"Let her go!" She demands.
Rick pulls a knife out of Joe, standing up and balancing himself. His eyes lock onto Dan, it was almost like he had tunnel vision. He pants.
"He's mine."
Rick takes a few strides towards you and you feel Dan's grip on you loosen as he's consumed with fear. He pushes you forward, staring to beg Rick for mercy.
Daryl catches you from hitting the ground as you watch Rick stab Dan over and over again. Michonne stands by you, trying to block your view of the slaughter.
"Carl." You whisper, realizing that he was still tucked inside the truck. "C-carl." You wiggle out of Daryl's grip, running to the truck and swinging the back door open.
You could see Carl's figure shaking underneath the blanket. "Carl." You say again. "Come on out, it's okay." You whisper. Slowly he peaks his head out, once his eyes meet yours, his body instantly relaxes and he's pushing himself off the ground and throwing himself into your arms.
You, Carl and Michonne stayed in the truck for the rest of the night while Daryl and Rick stayed outside. Nobody talked. Rick looked to be in his head.
Carl laid on across the back seat, his head resting on my lap. You tried to lull him to sleep but it was clear that nobody would be getting a blink of sleep after what just played out.
When the sun started to rise you asked Michonne to take your place, not wanting Carl to be alone. Daryl had gone out to scout the area.
You poured some water onto a clothe and sat down in front of Rick, settled between his legs but leaving enough space to make it appropriate.
His eyes flickered to yours as you wiped the blood off his face.
“Should’ve saved the water.” His voice was hoarse. You shook your head, trying your best to clean him.
“He shouldn’t see you like this.” You say calmly, wiping his hands clean once his face and neck were clean. Rick watched you intently.
“Are you okay?” His voice softens as he asks. You clear your throat, flashbacks of last night playing through your head. Ricks clean hand reaches up and his thumb rubs your cheek softly.
You were able to catch sight of your face in the car mirrors. Red scuff marks littered your face where you were pressed into the ground.
“I’m okay, it’s not that bad.” You shrug. Rick stared into your eyes, his hands still holding your face.
“Are you okay?” He asks again, really holding your gaze. Your chest tightens and you know you won’t be able to fight the tears.
Rick let’s go of your face but pulls your body into his immediately. You let the tears fall as he held you. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered in your ear. “I will never let anything happen to you. Ever.” He kept apologizing, his voice cracking every so often.
“You’re safe.” He says. “You’re safe with me.”
And you knew that he was telling the truth.
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