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trossy20 · 5 years

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1/24/2019 Millbrae, CA

So I’ve made it! Here we are in CA. West coast is truly the best coast (and yes my boo CO, that includes you too). Currently I’m in the backyard of the house (Airbnb hostel-like place) under their mini gazebo/patio thing. It was cold last night, so the chairs are all dewy, encouraging me to take a sit on the pavement. It’s not particularly warm, but the sun is out and doing it’s thing just right. It’s 0940ish; I woke up around 0900, having gone to bed close to 0100 watching Californication and Big Mouth which, no Matt, it’s not funnier while you’re stoned. I did a double last night at Marvelous Performance, but that would’ve been more impressive at Terra Nova because at this gym, I’m currently partaking in the Fundamentals level. It felt great yesterday though to have done their crossfit-level workout afterward. I’m excited for tonight, which will be another double: fundamentals strength first, HIIT class after. I’m especially excited though, for this thing they’re advertising (and I can’t seem to find any other info on it than what Matt ((one of the coaches)) told me) called something like 6-weeks to Best Self. I met a dude last night who was cool enough to just walk up to me randomly and introduce himself. I liked his energy and he was a similar height, but built! He’s been a member for a year and said he started with the 6 week thing too-- said it’s worth it especially for the nutritional/educational piece. :3 so i gotta get on registering. Imma ask more tonight. There’s an orange and lemon tree back here, with fruit but a bit too early to pick. According to the other residents, there’s also a cherry and apple tree. Our neighbors have persimmons (my like new fav fruit) and figs! Amazing. This place is a little house, longer in length than width, with about 6 bedrooms. Each bedroom has bunkbeds and from what I understand, there’s a single private room? It works though! Yknow, if you’re not OCD about things/not super bugged by messy people… A team comes to clean supposedly twice a week, but the residents report it’s been more so once a week, which isn’t cool because we’re past half capacity. Still, it works. 3 or 4 fridges in total, a kitchen, living room, tiny dining room, a basement with another tv and computers which I can’t figure out if they belong to anyone in particular or not. 3 guitars or more (mine included). A piano. Plenty of bikes (supposedly one is communal, but every one that brought their own bike is willing to share. A poor excuse for a workout bench but it can work. Communal/free laundry soap (feels weird to smell different). And a solid group of misfits. The coffee here is free (As even indicated by a little sign someone made) and there’s nearly always a fresh pot on. I shared a lot of my mush yesterday which is fine because I’m getting help paying for it anyway ty Katherine, and people are getting hooked but now it’s not even gonna last 24H x). Gotta make more today… So being here: It’s been a little disorienting to find my feelings. Today’s the first day that I’m taking a bit of time to create the space. My last day off was a bit of that, but I was so excited and distracted by my mini adventure to Sprouts that I didn’t make a lot of headway for what’s going on up there. I was starting to wonder if there’s much going on at all, just because everything is new and engaging and something’s always happening (even if it’s just netflix or someone playing video games). It’s all too easy to just let the days roll by. I checked in** on Jan 6th, was it? (**got to millbrae a day earlier and Ren gave me crap later for having us sleep in the car and not Elo/Peter’s place hehe). I wonder too, if it was too quick of a transition. I’m slowly allowing the format of my exploration to change. CO was all about meeting people via apps, but here I’ve already fallen into a group and met people way more easily in person ie Marvelous Performace, a friend of a friend, or even work/fellow travelers. As the experience pans out, I’m at least aware that allowing this format to be different is growth in itself. It makes me wonder how the next place might feel. I’ve also started to wonder about extending here… but that remains to be seen. (Been toying with the idea of WA next). There’s a crow that’s been vocal this morning, little finches chirping at a quicker pace, and another bird I don’t recognize all seemingly celebrating the quiet, warm morning. I’ve notifed just now my nose is a tiny bit stuffy, but I can still smell the sweet baked/fried goodies from whatever bakery nearby. It carries in the wind to pretty impressive distances, but I think we’re close by. My laundry is going so I’m feeling extra productive/not worried about how I should be adventuring right now instead because I need to stick around to move it over/start the next load, and that made me wonder something new: I don’t feel … inquieto. I think that translates to anxious/restless. I always think it’s appropriate to say “be still, my heart,” if one is feeling inquieto, so I guess the translation fits. Still, i think those english words are a bit deceiving. Inquieto in ronnie world is yes, both of those, but fueled by a FOMA type of energy. I’m very aware of my emotional habit of needing to feel productive/busy all the time or else I’ll begin to feel depressed (something to examine later, though I don’t think it’s necessarily unhealthy of a thing. Bagh, but who knows what I’m hiding now), but (rounding back to the Something New) I think that energy is more at peace here, and that’s what’s mainly throwing me off. “Ronnie, what do you want..?” Uhh… Idk! We can always walk to Trader Joe’s or hop on the bus or train somewhere or read.. “Shouldn’t we be out meeting people? Meetups? Destinations? Missions?” Hm. I mean I guess but I rather just ride the bus or train :3 So maybe my social quota is filled already with these rascals. I expressed to Tracy that I was a little worried I’m not worried about it (am I asexual?), when she asked if there were any new love interests. She assured me that that’s totally normal-- we go through phases of course. She went through a 2 year stretch of not even giving that thought because life was just busy. She was doing her, and that was okay. That resonates with me. I guess I have this perception that around my age, everyone should be out socializing/meeting people/flirting/hooking up/getting trashed… but cmon ronnie, was that ever really you? I do find that fun occasionally, but it’s like I’m super happy to be settling more into my grandpa-like tendencies. I think the 8hr shifts have a lot to do with it too: the life I have within these contracts is probably hugely dictated by the shift I signed up for. These 8hr-ers encourage my grandpa trends, encourage a routine, encourage my days off to be restful and adventurous in MY way. In comparison, CO was 12hr-ers, nights, but took up about 4 days a week of my life. The rest of the days? I guess just chillin with Ren XD but it’s still different. Not in a bad way! Maybe I should look into more introspective prompts. Mainly I just try to gauge the degree of my inner FOMA, or trans-dom x) “*knocks on the mental door* Hey, Ronnie? You okay? You wanna do anything in particular?” -I’m good! “*narrow-eyed look* don’t be so quick to respond now, member?” -I know, but really! We could maybe paddleboard-- it’s supposed to be 60 deg today but if we don’t totally cool because that’s a lot of work opening the basement garage and all. Member, we gotta make more food at some point. *shrugs* meetup for ideas? But yeah, no FOMA :3 “Okay.. how you feeling bout dysphoria?” -Decent. I know we’ll have our class tonight. Should probs take a progress photo and that whole 6 week thing.. :) “Worm, cool. I’m thirsty.” It’s restaurant week! Maybe I’ll text that dude and his fiance to join us :3 1040 now, gonna check my laundry, skim meetups, and look into another pair of shoes because I destroyed the active ones……..

#jan2018 #CA2018 #millbrae

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highkeyl0ki · 7 years

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Have I Told You Lately

A//N: I had in intense craving for some Bucky fluff so here it is! It is my first imagine so please be nice!

Word Count: 2,011

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: None

Summary: Early mornings with Bucky and Y/N

The early morning sun shone through the curtains, shining on the closed eyes of the young woman that lied in the king sized bed. She gave a soft moan and turned over and yawned, her eyes blinked and focused on the man that slept deeply beside her. She smiled softly and brushed her fingertips across his cheek before checking the digital clock on the bedside table next to Bucky. 6:27. ‘I won’t be able to go back to sleep.’ She thought before her stomach growled. Listening to her body, she quietly, as not to disturb her sleeping boyfriend, slipped from the warm bed, grabbing her phone off the side table on her side. She shivered a bit when her feet hit the cold hard wood floor as she made her way to he kitchen of their shared apartment and placed her phone on the white marble countertop, opposite to the stove.. She decided on pancakes, eggs, and bacon and she pulled the necessary ingredients before putting on a pot of coffee. Robotically, she started on breakfast having made the morning meal many times before. She became lost in her own world thinking about nothing in particular. She was in the middle of cooking the bacon when a coldness wrapped around her middle causing her to jump and gasp.

“Morning doll.” Came a rough voice from behind her. She instantly relaxed into his embrace and he peppered kisses along the left side of her neck and he brought his flesh arm around her waist and tightened his grip. “Smells wonderful.” He said in between kisses. She giggled and scooped the bacon on the plate and turned around. She stood up on her tip-toes and gave a quick kiss to his lips. “Would you set the table for me darling?” She asked. He nodded and leaned down to kiss her nose and turned to get plates and cutlery. Bucky never said much in the morning and neither did she. On weekdays he went to the gym with Steve around 6 AM. On the weekends, like today, they typically just enjoyed each others company with gentle touches and soft caresses; opting to lay in bed until noon. They had been together for a little over a year now and their honeymoon phase never did end. Of course they had their little arguments like how Bucky would always leave his plate in the sink with out rinsing it instead of putting it in the dishwasher or how she had a bad habit of leaving her shoes around the apartment but they never lasted long and always ended with kisses, giggles, and ‘I love you’s.’ Bucky helped her get the food on the table and she poured two mugs of coffee. Hers with milk and some blue agave syrup and Bucky just plain black. They sat next to each other at the kitchen table and held hands as they ate. Her thumb rubbing circles on the back of his hand. These were her favorite times with Bucky. These quiet, calm mornings doing something so domestic with the superhero. The morning sun came through the window giving the kitchen a bright and cheery look. The sun shone onto he kitchen table, illuminating the yellow daffodils in the vase. She would have to change the water today and clip the ends of the stems; she made a mental note to herself. They ate in silence and then they heard a soft ‘meow.’ Both looked down in between them to see Heidi, her cat who had taken quite the liking to her mistress’ boyfriend, was staring intently at the piece of bacon Bucky was holding up to his mouth. He chuckled and put the bacon down and let go of her hand before bending down and picking up the slightly overweight feline. She reached over and scratched behind her familiar’s ear. Her cat closed her eyes and purred loudly. Bucky took his free hand that wasn't holding Heidi and broke off a piece of bacon and held it up to the cat’s mouth who had immediately devoured the little piece. “You know, she was never this spoiled before you.” She mused, rubbing the underside of her fur-baby’s chin. “Nah, she’s not spoiled. Just well taken care of.” He said laughing a little. You rolled your eyes and scooted your chair closer to Bucky and laid your head on his shoulder, eating the last of her bacon and sighing contently. She looked up and admired his ice blue eyes. They had the power to pierce her soul from just looking at her and his jawline which was slightly hidden by his stubble could cut a diamond. Yes, his features were hard and sharp but in these moments, when he smiled, and his eyes were filled with happiness, she couldn't help but marvel at how handsome he was. ‘I love you.” She said quietly. His head turned and he looked at her with such tenderness and love. “I love you too.” He said and kissed her again. He pressed his lips to hers and she brought her hand up to cup his jaw, her thumb running along his jawline and she felt his stubble that tickled the pad of her finger. He sucked on her bottom lip and she gave a soft moan and then he pulled away. Heidi had been twisting and turning, bored now that she wasn't the center of attention and Bucky set her down on the floor and went off to do whatever. They both laughed and she once again rested her head on his shoulder and played with his fingers. She started singing softly, slightly under her breath but it was loud enough for the super soldier to hear. ‘Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there's no one else above you? Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness Ease my troubles, that's what you do For the morning sun in all it's glory Meets the day with hope and comfort too You fill my life with laughter, somehow you make it better Ease my troubles, that's what you do There's a love less defined And its yours and its mine Like the sun And at the end of the day We should give thanks and pray To the one, to the one Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there's no one else above you? Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness Ease my troubles, that's what you do There's a love less defined And its yours and its mine Like the sun And at the end of the day We should give thanks and pray To the one, to the one Have I told you lately that I love you? Have I told you there's no one else above you? Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness Ease my troubles, that's what you do Take away all my sadness, fill my life with gladness Ease my troubles, that's what you do’ Bucky completely relaxed and happy let himself drift off into a wold of his own, listening to the soft hum of her voice. Yes, these were his favorite kinds of moments. He could have spend all day like this but the sound of her phone went off, shattering the peaceful dream-like state they were both in. She sighed and slowly got up and walked over to check her cellular device. Bucky got up and started clearing the table of the plates and started rinsing them in the sink remembering how dirty dishes drove his girlfriend crazy. “Tony invited us to a bbq tonight. You wanna go? Everyone else is.” She asked as she wrapped her arms around his middle, reversing the position from earlier that morning. “Sure doll.” She could feel the vibrations as she rested her cheek on his back. “What dessert should I make?” She released his waist and took the rinsed off dishes and placed them in the dishwasher. “Love, I’m sure Tony doesn't expect you to bring anything. He always has more than enough.” He handed her the last plate. “I know. But it’s rude to show up to someone’s house empty handed.” She put a detergent pod into the dishwasher and started the machine. “How old-fashioned of you.” he said drying his hands with a dish towel. “Thats funny coming from an old man.” She teased and bumped his hip with hers and she turned around to wipe down the counter top. Bucky took the now wet dish towel and twisted it around a few times before snapping it on her backside, rat-tailing her. She let out a yelp and he snickered. “Meanie.” She pouted and rubbed her behind. Bucky threw the dish towel on the counter and went over and kissed her pouted lips. “You love me.” She rolled her eyes and sighed. “Yeah I guess I do.” He pulled away and raised his brows. “You guess? Well I guess I’ll have to teach you a lesson.” She looked at him confused and he picked her up and ran into the bedroom, throwing her onto the mattress. He climbed on top of her and began tickling her sides and she cried out in laughter. “N-no! Stop! Bu-Bucky! That tickles!” She gasped out in-between laughs. “Really doll? This tickles?” He teased, the biggest smile stretching across his face. He looked down and saw her hair spread around her head like a halo. Her eyes squinted shut, her smile so wide it made her cheekbones stand out and her face flushed a gorgeous pink. “Take it back.” He tried to sound serious but she could hear the smile in his voice. “Never!” She shouted and then it stopped. She opened her eyes to see Bucky turning around and straddling her legs. “James,” She said seriously. “What are you doing?” “You won’t take it back. And desperate times call for desperate measures.” He seized her legs in a death grip and began to tickle the bottom of her feet. She then howled with laughter. “Okay! Okay! I take it back! I take it back!” She screamed. Bucky laughed and how little resistance she put up and released her legs before flopping down beside her. She was breathing heavily a smile still stretched across her face as she tried to catch her breath and he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. His smile matching her own. She nuzzled into his chest and Heidi jumped onto the bed and pushed her way to lie in between them. “What time did Tony want us over?” He asked kissing the top of her head. “Around 4.” She said and reached down to scratch her cats head. Bucking looked at the clock and saw it was only 10 am. “Gives me enough time to cuddle with you.” He murmured into her hair. “I have to make dessert though.” She protested and attempted to get up which caused him to tighten his grip. “Babe, it’s 10 in the morning. You have plenty of time.” She sighed and relaxed into the bed. “Fine. Only until noon. Then I need to make cooking and get ready.” In a voice and oozed finality. “Sounds good to me.” He chucked at her authoritative tone. She ran her fingertips along his arm and Bucky sighed in contentment. He began to hum the tune of ‘Have I Told You Lately’ and she marveled in the way his his chest vibrated and the deep humming was music to her ears. Moments like these they both lived for. The calm simplicity and blissfulness. They never thought it was possible to be this happy, this in love. But here they were, laying in a bed with white fluffy sheets, the sunlight coming though the curtains, their cat purring peacefully between the two warm bodies and the both of them wrapped up in each other so unbelievably jubilant and intoxicated with love.

#avengers #avengers imagine #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes one shot #bucky one shot #marvel imagine #the winter solider imagine #the winter soldier #james buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes imagine #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan

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