#married to a man | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

darkdragonlilly · 1 year

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Why do I always get hit on by middle aged men? Why can't it be alt/goth girls or nerdy girls who like leggings and oversized sweaters? Or just girls in general.

#polyamorous #bisexual #married to a man #want a girlfriend #not allowed to date other men #bye dudes #bisexual woman

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rubbish78 · 11 months

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Oh okay bitch trying to go out with me is MARRIED

#married to a man #what crack are you on?

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dykecubes · 3 months

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Tommyinnit inadvertently collecting every LGBTQ+ identity for himself despite being a cishet man is the funniest thing in the world, first he gets cancelled for being a lesbian, then he gets gay married to tubbo and writes fanfiction about how sad he is that he won’t kiss him with tongue, now apparently terfs think he’s trans because he got ball surgery??

“‘This [person] is LGBTQ+’ what, all at once” is about him, he’s the final boss of allyship

#fae.txt #tommyinnit #worlds first cishet lesbian gay married trans man

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gravityfying · 3 months

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Come home with me.

#who are you?#the man who's gonna marry you #IM ORPHEUSSS #happy valentines day!#toh #the owl house #willow park #hunter #huntlow #grav art #toh the future it's for

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vantabrooke · 6 days

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Remember when Grian building a shrine to Mumbo to bring him back sent everyone into a frenzy? We now have Hermits building statues of each other and ACKNOWLEDGING IT. Joel has turned Hermitcraft from an SMP into a rom-com. This MARRIED MAN has rolled a critical success to seduce basically every server member, all while having a monument to his wife in his base!!!! insane

#hermitcraft #hermitblr #hc #joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans #half of these people are married how does he do it #watch out ladies mr. joel “steal yo man” smallishbeans is on the prowl

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abby-howard · 2 months

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#comics #journos #when a horror creator marries a nice young man #don't worry i horribly misspelled je ne sais quoi on purpose

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erabu-san · 1 month

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ERHM.... Sethos 🥰

#my art #genshin impact #sethos #sethos genshin impact #his design is literally evil cyno /pos #and he looks like claude from fe3h (aka the man i marry 3times in my playthrought)#the long hair had me.

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morganbritton132 · 1 month

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Steve is sitting at the table in the kitchen FaceTiming Tommy to help his daughter with her math homework when Eddie brings his live-stream into the room.

“While Isla’s in the bathroom, I’m going to do the same,” Steve says, standing up. He tells them both, “Play nice.”

They do not do that because it’s funnier to keep the rivalry going. The first thing Eddie says when Steve steps out is, “Does it still eat you up inside that I married him?”

Tommy replies easily with, “Are you still jealous that I kissed him first?”

Carol chimes in, “Actually I kissed him first.”

“Doesn’t count,” Tommy and Eddie say at the same time. “There was no tongue.”

“And no declaration of love,” Eddie adds. “Only I got that.”

“Actually…” Robin says, never letting anybody forget. “He confessed he was in love with me and I didn’t have to kiss him.”

#in honor of the Tommy/Eddie/Buckley drama that’s going to go down in tonight’s episode of 911 #here’s some Tommy/Eddie/Buckley drama in this Stranger Things AU #the most fun you can have with your lavender divorce is to remind people that the most eligible man in Hawkins married you first #eddie munson tiktok saga #steve harrington #eddie munson #tommy hagan #robin buckley

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chaoticace2005 · 1 month

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Alastor: You know, when I was alive people would always tell me I should find a woman and have kids.

Angel: Ouch, I feel you there Smiles. You’d ever find a way to get them to stop?

Alastor: Well-

Angel: Beyond murder.

Alastor:

Alastor: Well, they usually stopped asking me to have kids once I started talking about a plan I had if I were to be cursed with children.

Angel, scared: …what?

Alastor: Step one, have children.

Alastor: Step two, hide babies all around the house.

Alastor: Step three, when my kid asks "Where do babies come from?" Respond with "Where DON'T babies come from?" and pull one out of a cabinet.

Angel:

Angel: Holy shit I might have to use that if my family comes around asking.

Husk: You’re dead. You can’t have kids.

Angel: Try telling my nonna that.

#aroace man and gay man from early 1900s bonding over expectation to marry and have kids #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel memes #angel dust #angel dust hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel incorrect quotes #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel husk #alastor #husker hazbin hotel #aroace alastor

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rocktheholygrail · 2 months

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3x10 || 3x11 || 3x12

will + being jealous of francis dolarhyde/the red dragon/the tooth fairy

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cometrose · 3 months

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zhongli is so fucking funny when hes avoiding people like venti last year and neuvillette this year he can’t catch a break he moves like they’re his ex husbands 😭

#zhongli #venti #neuvillette #genshin impact #locking people out of a restaurant or discreetly getting some tea #HE WORKS HARD TO KEEP HIS PEACE #zhongli in a bucket of tea leaves: quickly traveler are they gone #venti and neuvi zhongli’s ex husband and zhongli the man who can’t stay married to save his life is on the run #but has reconciled his differences with venti i believe! they are friends don’t get it twisted zhongli is just a shit #zhongli in the back of restaurant: traveler PLEASE do not tell my ex husbands i’m here or im finished #he moves like a 5 time divorcee #zhongli next year: oh no my 4th ex husband is here during my annual nye party i have to hide!

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multifariousqueer · 11 months

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can you write miles 42 having readers bank account, card ALL that on his phone and gets mad if she purchases shi with money he didint give her. its really crazy but its miles 42....what do you expect??? hehe

Sure love!!!

A/n: y’all I love you so much but I need you guys to start requesting regular miles fanfic pls. Although 42 miles owns my 🩷

It was just a simple necklace. It was the Vivienne Westwood necklace that you saw everyone around you wearing and wanted so badly. You knew Miles would get it for you in a heartbeat but a part of you wanted to get it for yourself. It had been a long, stressful semester but you struggled through it all and got to a point where ou were passing with A’s and B’s. Coincidentally, you had gotten a job at Starbucks after months of applying and you had about $1000 saved up of your own money that you were waiting to spend on something special. That was, until that “something special” came along in the form of Miles.

You never knew what he did but you knew he was making 8x your salary in a month. It seemed like anything you wanted, you got when you were with Miles; shoes, clothes, books, makeup any and everything you wanted, it was yours in a matter of days. It’s worth mentioning that Miles is extremely overprotective and wants to know everything about what you’re doing and buying because he loves you and cares about your habits.

Even on Miles’s birthday when you dipped into your savings to get him the latest Jordan’s, he was furious that you had to use your own money:

“Damn Ma, these are valid. How much were they?”

“Oh don’t worry about it” you said

“I said, how much were they.” His eyes narrowing in on you because he knew how much they were because he was gonna buy them 2 weeks ago but decided not to.

“$500. I’ve been saving for them for you, baby. It’s all good” you tried to assure him

“Aight. thank you.” He said, pulling you close to him, the scent of the Dior Sauvage cologne you also bought him, filling your nostrils

But deep down you knew he was pissed off and mad that you spent your own money, so after a long talk about how he should be able to keep tabs on you and keep you safe, you gave him your Apple Pay and banking info for emergencies only but of course it’s Miles and being the overprotective boyfriend he is, he checks it everyday for any “extravagant purchases” made by you or someone else.

Of course he isn’t crazy, he set a $25 limit for you before he steps in and asks what’s up. Once, you were at a mall with your friend and found the cutest shirt at Urban Outfitters and decided to buy it. The price tag read $50 but you went ahead and got it; the same happened at Bath and Body Works and Tilly’s and as you made your way to the bathroom, you got a text from Miles:

Miles: did someone take your card?

You: no why??

Miles: why’d you spend $150 in an hour??

You: I’m at the mall

Miles: so? I pay for your shit

You: dawg it’s $150. It’s not that deep 💀

Miles: I ain’t yo “dawg” and yes it is when Yk I buy you shit

You: you aren’t my sugar daddy

Miles: I basically am atp. I’m sending you $1000, buy something cute

You contemplated leaving him on seen but you remembered how he hates that so you replied:

You: Okay

You had saved up enough to get the necklace and when you got it, you were ecstatic. You thought about all of the possible outfit combos and how good it will look against your brown skin but your thoughts were interrupted by a certain someone:

Miles: what’d I tell you, Mami?

You: ?

Miles: don’t play dumb, yk I would’ve bought you that necklace in a heartbeat but instead you wanted to be miss independent and buy it yourself. I guess since you’re so independent, I’ll stop sending you that $1000 every week. How about that?

You: ok

Miles: ?

You: we can discuss this when I get home

Miles: K

You: k

It was a long ride home but eventually you accepted that Miles was gonna rip your head off and there wasn’t anything you could do about it.

When you got home, he had three of the necklaces, two huge teddy bears, a bouquet of your favorite flowers and the newest pair of Jordan’s waiting for you:

“What’s all this?” You smiled and asked

“I told you I’ll pay for your shit, y/n” miles said, with a small smirk on his face