#liza strike | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bullet-prooflove · 9 months

Text

Queen - Filip 'Chibs' Telford x Reader

Tagging: @corruptedcoffin @anime-weeb-4-life @redpoodlern @ravencrow83 @kishie8 @thelonewolfwillsurvive @thanossexual @nu1freakshow @oureternalbond @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @jtelford @the-wandering-lunatic @darqchilddaydreamz @yourwinchesterbros @lexondeck @keyweegirlie @poppyrose33 @belovedbastardremus @trublu2u @thebaileybugle @ambassadortotrilliusprime @yvette22 @legally-a-bastard @thequeenoftheisleofavalon @joyfulfxckery @waysbsgr @thanossexual @justreblogginfics

Companion piece to Punishment and Silver & Gold

You’re working late when it happens.

The building has been empty for hours, Liza your receptionist had popped her head in to say goodbye somewhere around six and after that you’d lost track of the time, caught up in the scribble of your pen on the yellow legal pad and the crescendo of Bach playing on your speakers. There’s a glass of Highland Scotch, from the distillery Filip had invested in back in Scotland, placed neatly beside your cell phone.

When the door to your office opens you think it’s Filip, it wouldn’t be the first time he’s turned up to bring you home because you’ve gotten caught up in something.

You don’t expect to see Galen.

The Butcher of Belfast closes the door quietly behind him before coming to stand in front of your desk. There’s a moment where you don’t move, you can’t. You can feel your heart palpitate against your ribcage, the scars on your back scratching against the fabric of your silk shirt. He tips his head slightly to one side before the left corner of his mouth twists up into a smile.

It takes you right back to that moment, the one where his hand threaded in your hair, gripping it and yanking your head right back so that you were staring into those malevolent eyes of his. You thought you knew fear up until that point, you’d endured a man who’d beat you because of your success. You’d slayed your monster. Galen had proved you wrong, he’d taken you to new heights, you hadn’t tasted terror not until you’d met him.

“What do you want?” Somehow you spit out the words, you can taste the vitriol on your tongue.

There’s a rage somewhere deep down inside of you that fucking burns. It’s violent, the fire that licks up your bones, you can feel it flooding through you as your hand comes to rest upon the top desk drawer. He takes a step forward and you hold your palm up as if to ward him off.

“Don’t…”

“Come on lass, you know that word doesn’t mean anything to me.” He reminds you as he places both hands upon the surface of your desk and leans in close. You can smell his aftershave and it makes your stomach twist because you remember the way it clung to your skin in the aftermath.

It’s almost intimate the way he holds your gaze. He’s seen parts of you that no one else has, not even Filip, and you’ve seen the depths in him. The joy he takes in extracting what he wants, the pleasure he feels during the act itself. There’s a bond between the two of you that no one in the world can understand except each other and you know that’s why he’s here tonight. You didn’t break in the barn. That presents a challenge and to a man like Galen, it’s like ringing Pavlov’s bell.

“The last time I had you I took exactly what I wanted.” He reminds you in a hushed tone. “I told you that I would keep doing it again and again and again and you would know every time that your man can’t protect you. That he’s nothing but a pawn on a chessboard and I’m a King.” His hand wraps around the glass of Scotch before he brings it to his lips. “Pawns can’t kill a king.”

“They can’t.” You agree, sliding open your desk drawer. “But a Queen can.”

The gun roars to life in your hand, the recoil vibrating through your arm as the first bullet strikes Galen in the chest. The glass slips from his hand, Scotch spilling over the front of his shirt as he stares at you in surprise. You fire a second time and his back hits the wall, his knees buckling from underneath him. You raise to your feet as he slides down it slowly, tsking as you shake your head.

“You underestimated me.” You tell him as you crouch down beside him and review your handiwork. Crimson stains grow across the white of his expensive shirt, his breathing is laboured and ragged, you can hear the catch in every breath, and you savour it. “You thought I would break but everything you did to me just put this fucking fire, right here in my chest.” You tap your finger against the space where your heart beats. “And the only thing that is going to sate that is watching the light die in your eyes, knowing that it was me that did this to you, the woman you spent hours torturing in a shitty broken-down barn in the middle of nowhere.”

“I should have killed you!” He snarls, blood staining his teeth as he bares them at you.

His pallor is already turning ashen, his skin taking on a waxy sheen. The stench of copper is in the air, you can taste it in your mouth as you survey the blood pool steadily growing underneath him.

“Your second mistake was leaving me alive to teach the man I love a lesson. I never told him what you did.” You say shaking your head. “I didn’t want that for him. He has enough to live with. I have to shoulder that burden, but I trust me it sits a lot fucking lighter knowing that you’ll never touch another woman again.”

You lower the gun, aiming it at his groin. His eyes widen and for a fraction of a second you think you see terror.

“You don’t have the balls…”

You pull the trigger, and he screams. It’s a hoarse sound, a strained bellow of agony that vibrates through his chest. You clap your palm over his mouth, stifling the noise, the same way he did to you when he fucked you.

“This is how it ends.” You tell him. “You and me in this room. A Queen and a cockless fucking King.”

Love Chibs? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

#chibs telford x reader #chibs imagine #chibs telford #chibs x reader #filip chibs telford x reader #filip chibs telford #filip telford #chibs sons of anarchy

144 notes · View notes

mangle-my-mind · 7 months

Text

Todd Haynes on Mandy Slade

OM: How did you come to cast Toni Collette as Mandy? She doesn't strike me as an obvious choice for the role as it is written; her most famous part was in Muriel's Wedding where she played the podgy, Abba-obsessed ultra-hetero outcast.

TH: Mandy was the hardest part to cast in the film. It's a particularly demanding role due to the range Mandy has to display as she changes from the seventies to the eighties. This type of camp female character has basically vanished from our cultural landscape, as far as I can tell. The closest equivalent today is probably a Parker Posey-type character, but she's still quite different from the Liza Minnelli of Cabaret or the Angela Bowie of the glam era. Mandy has a theatrical, campy party girl persona that can be turned on and off at will, and owes a great deal to the gay male sensibility of the time. I think women around the world were liberated from all kinds of highly codified notions of femininity when people like Patti Smith entered the pop cultural arena. It had such a profound effect on women but girls today have no memory of that kind of camp femininity.

I saw so many strong actresses for Mandy, both in the US and the UK, and it was really tough to find the right one. We came close a few times, but it wasn't until I met Toni that it all clicked. I had no doubt about her acting ability, but the question was how to transform Toni Collette psychically, both for the camera and in her own self-regard into this very different, very confident, overly sexual creature. She really had to go off the cliff; I'm sure it was terrifying. And what you see in the film is such a transformation, such a complete commitment to the role that she almost becomes unrecognizable as Muriel in Muriel's Wedding. After a certain point, nothing was too scary for Toni. What you get with the character is what you get with the actress playing her - this range of changes and the effects of various cultures and various experiences on one extraordinary woman.

OM: Although the script informs you of Mandy being an American bisexual who reinvented herself, you get the sense of invention fully in the scene where she presents Brian with the divorce papers. She breaks down and you see the façade in a seventies context. It's a very moving moment and it's contrasted with Brian's coked-up emptiness. What did you discover in your research about the 'back-stage' women of the glam era?

TH: I guess Mandy's basic expression of real needs is made more vivid by that scene, but the beaten-down, hard-boiled Mandy of the eighties gives you the framework for that. She was definitely one of those people who was feeling and hurting and acting out at the same time. Often the casualties were the women of the male rock world. I really feel the film builds and develops complex sympathies for Mandy that you won't necessarily feel going in. The character is loosely inspired by aspects of Angela Bowie, and it's very easy to make fun of that kind of pop creature after the fact. But in all the books I read there was no argument on how fundamentally essential Angela Bowie was to the invention of Ziggy Stardust and to glam rock in general. She inspired risk-taking and flamboyance to a degree no one else can claim credit for. It wouldn't have happened without her.

Source - "Superstardust: Talking Glam with Todd Haynes", Oren Moverman.

Photo source

Emphases my own :)

#mandy slade #velvet goldmine #25yearsofvelvetgoldmine #velvetgoldmine25th #many things to think about from this.#first - Toni Collette's ever-changing accent through the film is a stroke of fucking genius #i will never understand people who criticize how all-over-the-place it is. that's the entire POINT #next - camp femininity!!!#Mandy really does more drag than the rest of the characters. I LOVE how performative she is with her gender #(also this interview is from when the movie came out and I think since then we've had plenty of displays of exaggerated femininity in pop)#then - often the casualties were the women of the male rock world!!!!#yes EXACTLY

80 notes · View notes

kthynes · 2 years

Text

husband for hire

18+

You proposition a very powerful mafia member before your father does and he abides.

warnings: course language, mentions of arranged marriage. fake husband/wife trope. Mafia!Lloyd x fem!reader (non-descriptive).

word count: ~1.1k

authors note: I was watching the proposal with the other Ryan in it when my ✨muse✨ came to me. So enjoy this filler piece while I reluctantly work on my bazillion other WIPs.

You both hated your father. For different reasons. For some time now. So you thought, on your wildest whims, that there’d be no other agreeable man like him.

”I don’t think I follow…” Lloyd Hansen winces while popping some Jordan almonds into his mouth. He’s bored, gant on listening but fully taken by you.

“Be my husband.” You confidently rephrase as he lazily gets up from the chaise and walks over to you.

“Only if you get down on one knee.” He jokes, peering down at your unceasing resolve. The buttons on his dress shirt come apart as he flutters his broad spanning shoulders and prepares his stance. Your lips tug at the corners, grimacing at the hard earned comment.

“Not happening.”

“So then what’s in it for me?” He asks while striking the patience of a dead man. Lloyd has never humoured you. You’ve only heard of him. So this interaction was not owed by any means.

“I just… I just… Gah!” You pause and exhale loudly, eyes pinched shut, strung with frustration. He’s licking his chops and kissing his teeth, punctuating the informed silence.

“God why am I like this?” You groan in the palm of your hands.

Groups of siren-like women are laughing behind the large barreled doors. Wedding goers are celebrating a truthful, loving union all while you attempted to coerce a notorious gang lord in the name of unholy matrimony.

Lloyd carefully studies your pitfall, enjoying your demure and every emotion you easily splay.

You snap your head up, bashful as can be. “Look I just need my father to trust my choices, to let me be.”

The matter of fact was that you were of age which meant that your father was petulant on finding you the right suitor. Day and night, men from the same walks of life would try to pursue you and right now you were conspicuous, trying to dodge the don of Spain.

“I haven’t felt myself in years and for once, I’d like to be free from all this,” You pathetically ramble, a known tendency of yours.

“You’re asking for a lot there,” Lloyd hums while looking at you sideways and crinkly eyed.

“He thinks I’m like cattle! Do as I’m told. Be who he is.” You nearly shriek, ready to hulk out of your gown. “I’ve had enough!”

“Right…” Lloyd ponders while drawing a thumb and pointer finger over his thick, unshorn chevron. “But see, the thing is that I still don’t know where exactly I fit in this equation of yours.”

“It’s simple. Let’s play house. You and I. No strings attached.” You begin. “Of course, we’ll have to establish some boundaries but for the most part it’ll get my father off my back.”

“And leave a blazon target on mine. Fuck that.” Lloyd walks past you knowing that he’s spent a fair amount of time in the drawing room, plucking at your pleas.

“Would you change your mind if you had the chance to fuck me?” You pipe just as he reaches the door.

Now there’s an idea.

“Now you’re pushing it.” He advises, although, taking you apart on top of the large executive desk wasn’t exactly a faraway thought. He comes up short, jaw ticking as he takes a deep, composing breath. Your mother never taught you how to act right especially in the order of mafia men. You spoke, whole foot in mouth, completely unashamed.

“Please Lloyd.” You were asking a lot of him. First to be his wife and now his play thing? He’s unprincipled to it all.

“Don’t make me a dishonourable man, sunshine.” He grunts before stepping out into the crowds that welcome him back again.

💍

“So what’d he say?” Your best friend, Liza grabs you by the arm, giving you a light shake as you stand by the side entrance, completely stock still.

Hours later, the evening toasts were still going on. Steve and Peggy had a lot of well wishers and you zoned out through almost all of them. Love is love is love, right?

“Y/N?”

“He almost had me.” You finally grumble. Liza opens her mouth to say something but then Lloyd takes center stage, deviating both of your attention. It’s the first time you properly take him in. Dressed like a 70s business mogul, he has some flare and underlying charisma. You never met anyone quite like him, an absolute alchemy.

“Hello everyone.” He starts off at ease, eyes scanning the crowd with a terse smile that he needed to work on. “Thank you all for coming by to celebrate my good friends Steve and Peggy.”

Everyone claps. Ear piercing whistles erupt, men shake their fists and huzzah. You’re silently observant, still kind of prissy for god knows what.

“I know we don men don’t have moments like this as often as we should but because Steve is different I’m glad that he’s found you, Margaret.” Lloyd initiates and someone in the crowd lets out a relieved ‘amen.’

“He had a prayer and somehow the scoundrel saw it through.” He shakes his head with a sly grin. “So cheers to that, I guess.”

He raises his glass with one hand while the other is shoved in his trouser pocket.

“Cheers indeed.” Liza snickers next to you, downing her champagne immediately.

“Now before I take off there is something else I’d like to preface, do, challenge, be with… or without.” Lloyd stalls, staring down at his untouched champagne flute. His unabiding seriousness passes through the crowd who look to one another. Your brows were automatically drawn together, steering with doubt as he lulled his head back up.

“I met someone. Someone so fucking audacious that I thought to myself why not?” He starts off with a crass proclamation. “Maybe she could give me this.” He points to the environment around him.

“And maybe I’d be dumb enough to see it through.”

Whispers take flight. You were bludgeoned with disbelief. “So… what do you say, Y/N Y/L/N. Will you marry me?”

Gasps flit through the auditorium. Liza whips her head around and yips with excitement as the hall lights shine down on you. Like a fish out of water, your mouth puckers.

“This can’t be happening.” You mutter to your closest companion while remaining underwhelmingly overzealous.

“I mean this is what you wanted so…” she adds under her breath, bobbing and acknowledging the stares. “Talk about a man of grand gestures.”

“Tell me ‘bout it.”

“Sunshine?” Lloyd reverberates, holding the mic so very close to his bushy upper lip.

“Yes.” You quip. No second thoughts. No apprehension. No backing down.

“What was that?” He inquires, trying to read your perfectly glossy lips. “Was that a yes?” Someone confirms and he repeats. “Yes?”

“She said yes!” Everyone cheers with all the more reasons to do so.

Lloyd smiles right at you, coveted by his new missus. You didn’t realize that you’d be let on this far. But he had other plans and maybe stringing you along could be impactful.

#lloyd hansen x you #mafia!lloyd x you #lloyd hansen x fem!reader #posting for funsies #chris evans #series: husband for hire

708 notes · View notes

sadgirlnoga · 4 months

Text

My 2024 predictions:

Sssniperwolf will be forced to delete all content featuring her ex husband

Very specific Deviantart accs will become animetoks next targets

Somebodies gonna make an ice cream stand where all the flavors are named after political ideologies, resulting in some of the funniest reviews to ever be seen

Girl defind will be caught in a fraud scandal

Hunter Schafer will announce she is leaving euphoria after the official trailer for season 3 is finally dropped

Numerous claims of Matt Walsh cheating on his wife with trans women(or a trans woman) will be brought to the public eye

A massive amount of family vloggers will have their channels taken down by Youtube, potentially forcing other family vloggers who havent had their channels striked to take down all of their content and/or retire

Copious amounts of forgotten kids shows will become super popular on Tiktok

Deviantart will be floptoks next target

Courtney Love will become a meme

Andrew tate will have beef with Pepsi of all things

Poison will be announced as dlc for Street Fighter 6(again...)

Three Days Grace will be caught in a massive scandal

Liza koshy will be forced to make an apology video, for what? Idk yet

Non russians are gonna discover shkola(2010) and start referring to it as "russian euphoria" (im literally already doing this, no im not russian)

And last but not least( or should i say the least attached with reality of mine yet) a self portrait of Van Gogh will get recalled or sold off to someone, footage of it being brought into a truck will spread across the internet like wild fire.

27 notes · View notes

debosedaily · 8 months

Text

ramon_pesante Latinos in New York City understood the assignment. @sagaftra @wgaeast @wgawest

#ariana debose #liza colón zayas #sag aftra strike #social #social: others social #aug 23

0 notes

galacticrambler · 2 months

Text

I occasionally just scroll through YouTube trying to find trailers for movies that are coming out soon that I may have missed. Lucky for me, I decided to open the video for Lisa Frankenstein and was blown away.

We went to check out the movie and had a really good time. It’s only about one hour and forty minutes long, so it’s a quick watch. There are some absolute laugh out loud moments that would come just when you needed it.

The story is centered around a girl who, after a traumatic party where she was drugged and almost sexually assaulted, goes to the “bachelor cemetary” that she regularly visits. While there, she states that she wishes she was with him. One lightning strike later, and he’s back from the dead in zombie form.

The 1980s setting and Kathryn Newton’s performance kept the film light and fun. A lot of her acting was opposite Cole Sprouse who was playing a mindless zombie who slowly regained his humanity. She was so funny in this, and I thought she knocked it out of the park.

The rest of the main cast (Liza Soberano, Joe Chrest, and Carla Gugino) were great in their rolles. Soberano’s performance as Taffy in particular was outstanding. Her timing was excellent, and she deserves all of the praise that she’s getting.

Diablo Cody wrote an excellent script for this movie, and Zelda Williams nailed her big directorial debut. The movie nailed the 1980s aesthetic, and I think it was smart to set it in that time period to give the movie a solid anchor point to reality.

If you get the chance to see Lisa Frankenstein, you should give it a look. You’re going to have a great time.

#movie #movie review #lisa frankenstein #diablo cody #zelda williams #kathryn newton #cole sprouse #carla gugino #joe chrest #liza soberano

10 notes · View notes

wubyreal · 8 days

Note

whole hog for marina?

(Turn back if you don't want spoilers about her deep dark secrets)

✨- How did you come up with the OC’s name?

I randomly thought of it, and Marina stuck since then. In universe, she is named after the marina where her parents first met. Her nickname is Chrysanthemum, which is her favorite flower. Her childhood friend group is a nod to the Chinese Four Gentleman, which is comprised of the chrysanthemum, orchid, bamboo, and plum.

🌼 - How old are they? (Or approximate age range)

Early 20s

🌺- Do they have any love interest(s)?

She has been betrothed to Seric Von Plum ever since she was a child. He is the son of her dad's best friend. Unfortunately Marina hates his guts and instead dates and flirts with other people as an act of rebellion. Her logic is if she finds someone richer than Seric, then her parents will call off the engagement. Her crushes are superficial, mostly liking people for their looks and status. She managed to date Liza, but the relationship fell apart because Marina is too crazy and annoying. Despite everything, Nadir is her one true love who is a nice regular commoner.

🍕 - What is their favorite food?

Chocolate coated flower petals and red velvet desserts

💼 - What do they do for a living?

Noblewoman as determined by her family's legacy. Pirate when she became crazy. Mercenary during her runaway arc.

🎹 - Do they have any hobbies?

Bossing people around, eating sweets, being hot, shooting, fencing, and joyrides

🎯 -What do they do best?

Really really good at shooting

🥊 -What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

She loves joyrides from sailing, flying, and driving. She hates being bossed around by people or forced to hang out with annoying people.

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories?

The day she first met Nadir as a child and when she first met Liza at school

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

When Liza defeated her in battle thus making her become tainted. When she couldn't convince her parents to undo the engagement with Seric

🧊 - Is their current design the first one?

It's the final design for her tainted arc. She has gone through many design changes. Funnily enough my brain defaults to her with the short gray hair even though the look is temporary. I guess I haven't designed her post-redemption or post-timeskip. There are still many designs to do.

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

She has an inspiration chart with lots of mean bitchy girls. Special shout out to Tinker Bell, Azula, Princess Morbucks, and Panty Anarchy. There are also some retroactive inspirations that were unintentional. She is similar to Mitsuru Kirijo from Persona3, except no niceness.

🌂 - What genre do they belong in?

High fantasy with gothic post-apocalyptic stuff

💚 - What is your OC’s gender identity and sexuality?

Cis bi

🙌 - How many sibling does your OC have?

1 younger sister that she treats as a minion

🍎 - What is the OC’s relationship w/their parents like?

Good relationship. Her parents doted and spoiled Marina as a child. They put up with Marina's antics cause as long lived elvenlike people, it's best to let her let the energy out of her system until she tires out and wises up. They never foresaw her making a pact and becoming evil. Marina is a daddy's girl that pretends to hate her mom but secretly does love her.

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

She's really fun to meme and has interesting dynamics with many of my OCs as the crazy one contrasting with the straightman. I also like her design a lot.

✏️ - How often do you draw/write about the OC?

Just like Ruby I think about and meme her every day. Writing and drawing happen when inspiration strikes.

💎 - Do you ever see yourself killing off the OC?

No. Nadir will not allow that.

💀 - Does your OC have any phobias?

Failure and that she's completely irredeemable. She's doubles down on being annoying because no one gives her a chance to change, see her for who she really is, or understand her actual needs.

🍩 -Who is your OC’s arch-nemesis or rival?

Theda Thorne for trying to seduce Nadir. Derrick for being Liza's younger brother. Moriti for not putting up with her bullshit. War for betraying her. Elmindreda Endymion for absolutely no reason. Skurret just for being ugly. She beefs with a lot of people.

🎓 - How long have you had the OC?

Most likely 2015

🍥 - What age were you when you created the OC?

I don't remember the exact age. Some time in high school.

#wuby.text #ask #Chrys #OC lore #OC ask #fvriva

7 notes · View notes

pluviophile-bookworm · 1 year

Text

Schmicago is Over and Done... so here are my thoughts on all of it (extra long post)

Episode 1: Welcome to Schmicago

In all honesty, I was fully prepared not to like this season bc I’m really not (or at least was not) that into this era of musicals, but all I needed was the start of Welcome to Schmicago and I was so completely in. Thank you to all the geniuses who made it possible.

No but… the second time round that the word ‘farrago’ comes up in the lyrics of the episode’s title song, I well, I was literally thinking ‘what the hey’s a farrago’, and the Narrator says ‘look it up’ — it’s like they’re reading the viewer’s thoughts. I love it. That’s the self-aware humour I’ve come for. Also, I did look it up and farrago means a confused mixture. I like it. It fits.

This is killing me (in the best way) — when they say ‘endings that are tragic’, the Narrator holds up a strand of Melissa’s hair. I love the double meaning.

I love love love this! At one point you can clearly hear Kristin Chenoweth saying ‘peas and carrots, peas and carrots’, and Josh and Melissa are like ‘Please don’t talk all at once, we can’t understand you’. Love that bit of theatre inside humour.

‘Do you have a cigarette, darling, I’m simply desperate’… what an introduction to Dove’s new character, Jenny Banks. Or, as I immediately dubbed her when I saw her, Liza Jr. I feel like I’m going to like her.

‘Fifty’s not that old’ — this coming, of course, from Keegan-Michael Key, who is 52 in real life. And ain’t he living proof of it, too.

I am loving Does That Shock You (I assume that’s the name of the song) [It’s Do We Shock You, actually, but there was no way for me to know that back when the episode aired, now was there?] — it’s like, ‘look, there’s a man and he’s wearing a dress’, ‘I like both boys and girls’, and, most hilariously, ‘I’ve experienced an orgasm. A female one.’ Goodness, this doesn’t shock me or Josh and Melissa, but it sure as the stars would render the people of Schmigadoon catatonic. And I love that, for some reason.

No but the cabaret girls… Annie, Kate, Molly, Tessie, Pepper, Duffy and Elsie. Like… a certain bunch of orphan girls from the same time period as all musicals referenced here take place. Plus Cabaret’s Elsie, of course. That’s basically as if… the girls grew up to become showgirls, which actually isn’t too far-fetched. And Ariana DeBose as the EmCee is slaying it. I love all of this. And Ann Harada is Madam Frau. Lady Lady. Cool! I love it.

‘My true passion is power [dramatic pause]… electricity’ I love love love all of this.

And Jenny Banks does a Cabaret-style number with chairography a la Mein Herr. Which is funny because Dove is just one of a whole bunch of people in this cast who would do (or, in certain cases, have done) a killer Mein Herr. Either way, I just know this will be one of my most replayed songs once the soundtrack comes out. When is that, btw? [That was yesterday, and I can fully attest to the above prediction being true.]

This number isn’t even subtle about what it’s doing. About as subtle as Va-Gi-Na or the Coming Out Reprise were last season ‘We’ve had a fine affair, but please get out of mein hair.’ I love this more than words can say.

Episode 2: Doorway to Where

The Narrator is just everything… ‘schmigadee-death… penalty’, anyone? Lovely.

Ahhh we’ve got Aaron!! That man’s voice makes me swoon in a way I didn’t think was possible to someone of my… identity. If you get what I’m trying to say. [What I’m trying to say is I’m aroace, but I do have a thing for voices, and for unconventionally attractive faces, except the latter isn’t relevant in very conventionally attractive Aaron’s case. He’s all voice to me. He could sing the phone book and I’d be done for.]

No but… his solo once again mentions squirrels and robins, and I’ve got to wonder why… like, is it just a reference to You Can’t Tame Me (my beloved), or is there something else? But also, his new character, Topher, strikes me as the only one who hasn’t changed quite as much — he’s once again a free spirit singing about squirrels and robins and wow, this is just utterly self-referential, isn’t it? I love that.

‘Please. Mr Flanagan was my father… after he lost his medical license.’ I love that. And I’m going to love Jane Krakowski’s character in this, I feel like. ‘First we court the press, then I press the court.’ I adore sentences like that. Sue me. But only with Bobby Flanagan as my solicitor.

Ok, so this one I caught. Melissa’s showgirl audition is set to a number evoking I Hope I Get It from A Chorus Line. Good going, me!

‘Dad was in the military. You know, the type with a whistle. He used to force my brothers, sisters and me to perform for guests at dinner parties. God, I hated when he did that.’ I see you, Sound of Music. I see you clear and bright. ‘So this one night I begged him for a taste of champagne’… ok, so you’re Liesl, are you? Well, funny, because all I can think of is Cecily as Liesl in that one SNL sketch with John Mulaney.

Ok but when Melissa meets Topher, she’s like ‘You look… groovy’, and I was like, his ‘pants’ are not really high-waisted in this one, though. But there’s a good chance he’s both high and wasted at any given time. I mean, so I imagine, he’s a hippie. Not to stereotype people, but hey, everyone is a walking steretype here.

When Topher’s buddies come to bust him and Josh out of jail on the happiness bus, Josh is like ‘it’s literal? I thought it was a metaphor.’ To which I say… ‘It’s not a metaphor, oh no, it’s something more — it’s a literal bus’. How’s that for a reference?

Episode 3: Bells and Whistles

Ok we’re on to episode 3 and… ‘ Rizzo, ChaCha, Doodie/ Zuko and Kenickie’… why, hello Grease! I didn’t quite expect you there, but of course that was a mistake. And also, in a number starring Danny Bailey/Zuko Aaron Tveit himself, no less.

I see you, Miss Kristin Hannigan! And I’m loving it. Mrs Lovett x Miss Hannigan has never made so much sense before. Add in some Mme Thenardier for good measure, and you’ve got the ultimate composite character.

No, I swear, between Kristin and Alan, this is giving me huge Thenardier vibes, even if it’s actually meant to be a homage to Sweeney Todd, I believe. I’m loving it either way.

Ok, so… Alan’s character, Butcher Dooley Blight, is Jenny’s father here. I love it. But oh wow, this got really bloody and dark and gory really fast.

This might as well be one of my favourite courtroom scenes. I mean, ‘On the grounds of Brooklyn’ is still my go-to, but Bells and Whistles, and Fosse jazz hands are truly something else.

‘Why am I flanked by fools’ is the new ‘I’m surrounded by idiots’, and I love it. No but, his song is actually about wanting love from women who don’t want him. He’s giving Phantom. And, oh gosh, the resounding bass note it ends on… almost more impressive than a high note.

Episode 4: Something Real

Well, it’s true that Dove and Aaron are, in my humblest of opinions, the two people whose characters from this season and the previous one are most alike — I mean, she’s a cheerful girl whose cluelessness may or may not be (and in this one definitely is) just an act and whose father would kill for her sake, and he’s a free spirit who sings about robins and squirrels (even though Danny’s ‘pants are really high-waisted’ whereas Topher would rather forgo any trousers at all because ‘flowers don’t wear pants’... which I think is a valid choice, wanting to emulate a flower. Go for it) — so, in a way, what I called has very much come to pass. Now how this is going to turn out by the end is a whole other matter, so we’ll have to wait and see.

Also, here’s a post I made the day the s1 finale came out, and... I was a bit blindsided, but I had the spirit:

Ok so the Narrator may be a bit of an arse to Mel and Josh, but I love him. I want Tituss Burgess to narrate every show in song.

Topher, arriving at the junkyard: ‘The prodigal son has returned. Someone write that down.’ The Fansie in me, knocking over about three walls at once: ‘I got a pencil!’

S1 Josh: ‘I’m not singing if you’re not singing.’ S2 Josh: ‘Talk to Daddy, talk, talk to Daddy’… now that’s what I call character growth. And that aside, this is just such a fun number. I can see myself listening to it on repeat once the soundtrack drops (which I need now btw). [Ah, yes, the ‘I’m not having an argument that’s part of a musical number’ to ‘I am not a man of many words’ to ‘Talk to Daddy’ pipeline. We stan.]

Whoever decided to pair up Dove and Aaron for a duet is a freaking genius. I need to know who that was so I can send them flowers to thank them for this vocal match made in heaven.

‘More romance’? If there’s one thing I don’t like about Schmigadoon/Schmicago, and it’s just this tiny little thing, really, but… it’s that it seems to emphasise romance as the ultimate solution, the single bringer of happiness. Only, I suppose, it will end up subverting that by the end of the season. Which would be nice if it does, indeed, happen. [Well... not exactly. But next season maybe... hope springs eternal.]

Ok, a scene centring around Kristin Chenoweth and Alan Cumming together in any sort of context is always welcome, but I’m just a bit too distracted by Dooley eating his mash using his cleaver as a spoon. It’s too funny!

No but the way he said ‘Life is just a pile of shit’… it spoke to my soul… somehow.

I have never, ever in my life laughed at the sight of someone openly discussing making children into meat, but if anyone can sell such a number, why, it’s those two. Marvellously morbid.

I hear you, ‘It’s a Hard-Knock Life’. I hear you loud and clear. Or should I say… It’s a Hard-Knock-off Life… ight I’ll see myself out. But who would have thought that mixing Annie with Sweeney Todd (and a sprinkle of Oliver!) would make such a delightfully dark and scrumptiously sinister song? Also, those tap-dancing children are so amazing! I wish we would get more than a number per season from them, but I always take what I can get. [This is another contender, along with Kaput and Talk to Daddy and Bells and Whistles, for my May Top Tracks on Spotify... what will end up happening remains to be seen, but the number of times I’ve looped those just since they were released there yesterday is already large enough to put them all in the top 20 if not the top 10.]

So this now marks two different songs I know where ‘scrumptious’ is rhymed with ‘presumptuous’ (Truly Scrumptious from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, of course, being the first), and in neither of those songs do these words sound like they should rhyme. This must be what Mel meant by that comment about imperfect rhymes, you know.

Doesn’t this just go to prove that you could sell infanticide to me if it’s accompanied by a musical number, and I’d eat it up with a spoon, or even a cleaver if I had one handy… what does that say about me, I wonder…

Episode 5: Famous as Hell

Cecily is such a star! (hey, nice alliterative phrase there) But for real, she is. Also, is this supposed to be Maybe This Time? I’ll know for sure once I watch the Schmeakdown, but I think it is, if not intertwined with something else as well.

Ok but the tribe seems to have imprinted on Josh like a bunch of baby ducklings. He’s their mama now. I love that.

I’m thinking the Narrator’s name should change to the Instigator. Love that for him.

‘Another damn rhetorical question’ might just be funnier than ‘Schmigadee-death penalty’. Either way, I love Tituss Burgess and what he does as the Narrator, or the Instigator if you will.

Ooh… I love this. Famous As Hell seems to be the sort of number which references everybody’s themes, and I love that in a number.

Ok so nobody should be subjected to 12-show day, but, like, as an obsessed fan I’d be there all day for it. Still, don’t make people perform until they bleed. Then again, this is Schmicago, so…

Wait a sec… so that’s what ‘substitutes become expedient’ meant? Not just the obvious ‘children-for-animals’ substitute, but ‘orphans-for-Kratt’. Well. I’m thinking Kratt wouldn’t make a very desirable load of sausages, though. Oh, great, now I’m considering it. I’m in so deep I’m losing awareness of how gory this all is.

Are those the twins who played the white-faced women in ASOUE, playing another pair of white-faced women? Why yes, it is them, Jacqueline and Joyce Robbins. Nice.

Ooh… ‘You’ve been getting my roses? — Moses supposes I have.’ I loved that. I’ve been wondering if Singing in the Rain could make it into the farrago, and it seems like it has.

Ok, now Kratt is definitely Phantom. Kidnapping Mel just after she’s become a star on stage and essentially going like, ‘you marry me or the man you love dies’. Also, what kind of a cliffhanger was this? I’m dying. How on earth will I make it to the finale? And there are so many knots to be untied, too many loose ends to be tied up… that’s an ambitious setup for the finale. [It was, indeed. Bit of a rush to untangle and tie up everything, it really was, but I loved it nonetheless.]

Episode 6: Over and Done

Ahhhh Ariana DeBose solo at last!! I’ve missed that so much. And a Dreamgirls solo at that! I found she was really underutilised this season, which sucks because she’s a queen, but is also completely understandable because there were so many plotlines even without her being at the forefront. Still though…

‘I shut down a dream ballet, I will shut down this’ Yes Mel, be in control of the narrative devices even if you can’t control the narrative… that is so poetic in its way. I love it.

Idk how I came to this thought, but Sgt. Rivera upon being told he has to kill Josh is giving the huntsman from Snow White. Can’t say I love that for him because it’s a really tight spot to be in, but his reaction is still one of my favourite moments.

Ok but like… is Ms. Codwell reluctant to let the orphans be killed now? What exactly was it that made her change her mind? And also, these poor kids are so death-happy, I can’t even begin to comprehend the black comedy of it all. It’s not even black comedy anymore, it’s saccharine tragedy.

Also, if Dooley and Ms Codwell get married, does that mean Kristin is going to be Dove’s mum once again? Because at first I enjoyed the subversion of them being completely unrelated here, but I’m starting to miss them as a mother-daughter duo. Maybe s3 can amend that? Whatever, just please let there be a s3.

Ok but Topher being a JCS homage all season and his tribe digging everything he says, and then once he pulls a literal Jesus, ‘turn the other cheek’ and whatnot, they’re sceptical? Idk, but I kinda dig that just bc I find it (1) funny and (2) totally reasonable.

I can’t… the Somewhere Love Is Waiting for You riff as Dooley reunites with his daughter… it’s too much. I’m going to cry. I was already going to cry, but this really is too much.

Ok but even when he doesn’t intend it, Dooley sure is good with that cleaver. And the narrative pulling a Phantom on the Phantom shout-out character… now that’s what I call poetic justice.

Yeah, sure, I’ll drink to that too. From now on I want all the villain death announcements to be done via Kaput reprise. Ding Dong the Witch is Dead who?

Rocky Horror Sgt. Rivera isn’t what I ever expected, but I’m digging it. I’m actually tearing up. What is with Schmigadoon season finales and making me sob my heart out? I need to have more of that.

Now excuse me for crossing my fandoms over here, but the tribe’s ending is giving Ordinaryish People by AJR: ‘Your hippie friends call you a sellout cos you buckled down and got a job’… indeed.

Goodness, Something Real with Topher and Jenny was one thing, but with Mel and Josh it feels that much more… real. I mean. Tell me it doesn’t. I’m not crying over the cheesiness that is a musical ending number, you are. Except I am, too, of course. How could I not be?

I did not have Narrator x Rivera on my bingo cards for this season, but like, ‘I don’t hate it’. I actually wish I could see it play out.

What’s better than Leprechaun Martin Short? Leprechaun Martin Short x2. I am living for every bizarre, out-of-left-field thing this finale throws at me. I really really really want more.

Ok but, as a lover of child-centric musicals, I now need a s3 with Josh and Mel and their little one in a land with more than one child-centred musical number. It’s not a want, it’s a need.

#schmigadoon #schmigadoon s2 #schmicago #schmicago spoilers #an extra long reaction post for good old times' sake

44 notes · View notes