#like I’d hate him less if he was interesting but hes just the WORST . like yeah we get it leave ur twink son ALONE | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wheresarizona · 1 month

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but I would die for you in secret

Part 2

summary: The relationship you have with Joel Miller is less complicated now that he’s going to tell Ellie that you’ve been secretly seeing each other for months. You thought their discussion would go well, but when you get home from work to a note on your front door from Joel that reads, ‘Come over, we need to talk,’ it has you immediately thinking the worst—up until he answers his door in nothing but a towel and drags you inside to fuck your brains out for the first time in his bed.

pairing: Joel Miller/f!reader

rating: E (18+!! No y/n, explicit smut, age gap (unspecified, reader is an adult), Possessive Joel Miller, Dominant Joel Miller, Joel Miller has a big dick, oral sex (m receiving), deepthroating (he tells you to choke on it (in a good way)), unprotected p in v (wrap it up!), creampie, breeding kink, rough sex, dirty talk (so much), spit mention, biting, spanking, whatever the kink is where you’re turned on by good dads, Joel in just a towel, pregnancy discussion, fluff, the last 3k words in Ellie’s pov (truly delightful), Good Parent Joel Miller, Ellie giving Joel so much shit, Joel giving Ellie shit, Ellie and Joel having the best discussions, TLOU AU where Joel doesn’t lie to Ellie and they’re good when they get back to Jackson)

word count: 11.1k+

a/n: Yes, I did make my own gif because I was too lazy to try and hunt for it. I really, really wanted to write about what happened after the last chapter, and here we are. I think this will be the last one. Thank you to the love of my life @juletheghoul for betaing!

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs feed me. I’d love to know what you thought!

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The sun hadn’t risen when Joel Miller left your bed this morning.

That's how it usually was, him coming and going in the dark so no one sees him leave his house to come to yours across the street—the nights you spend together are bathed in secrecy, the two of you inhabiting your own little world, confined to the space of your home.

Why the sneaking around?

He didn’t want his daughter, Ellie, to know of his relationship with you. Over the many months you’ve been together, he’s let you in on much of what she had gone through before they got to Jackson. You understood that he’s all she has, and he’s worried that if he started openly dating, she’d think she isn’t as important to him as before or feel like Joel’s abandoning her. That’s the main reason he didn't want her to know, but with how often he brings up you being so much younger than him, and all the times he’s said you should be with someone your own age, you felt that he’s also ashamed of how old you are.

At least, that’s what you thought until the night before when he revealed his feelings for you and told you he wasn’t ashamed of you or the large gap in your ages.

When this all began, Joel was clear that all he could give you was his body—he was emotionally unavailable because he was too focused on taking care of Ellie.

Amazing sex with no strings attached? You were okay with that.

Except it wasn’t something casual, and there were strings attached.

You don’t just occasionally hook up with Joel; no, he’s at your place most nights and some days without his daughter knowing. You also can’t go out with anyone else, not that you want to—he doesn’t share or like when other men are interested in you. You aren’t any better, hating when women flirt with him, especially his next-door neighbor Sandra, who refuses to acknowledge he doesn’t want her.

Why does she, specifically, annoy you so much?

Not only does she shamelessly flirt with Joel any chance she gets, but she also touches him, her hand always ending up on his arm that he shrugs off, making him growl at her not to touch him. Does she listen? No, she still does it every time she runs into him, and it pisses you off that she doesn’t respect his boundaries. Plus, there was an incident a couple of months after he moved to Jackson where she got him over to her house under the false pretense of needing something fixed and then basically jumped him—she kissed him without his permission and came onto him, which he was not into and had him leaving immediately. He can’t stand her, and he’s been very firm with her that he’s not interested. If what she does to Joel isn’t bad enough, she creeps the fuck out of Ellie, and that pisses you off even more. You’ve lost count of how many times you’ve saved the kid from talking to her; the look on Ellie’s face that screams she wants to be anywhere other than with Sandra makes your hackles rise, and a need comes over you to get the girl out of there as quickly as possible.

Has anything ever happened between Joel and Sandra to make her delusional enough to think if she keeps harassing him and his daughter, he’ll eventually want to be with her?

From what you understand, Tommy and Maria tried to set them up when he first arrived, but he declined; it truly was a case of right place, wrong time. He was polite when he rejected her and explained that his daughter needed him and that he had zero interest in starting a relationship with someone. Back then, he was completely occupied with taking care of Ellie, and dating was out of the question; it didn’t even cross his mind or was something he wanted. He was content with his fresh start in Jackson, alone with his kid to help her heal.

Why did Joel accept your advances the first time you met?

Right place, right time.

Once you moved to town, the father and daughter were settled to the point that Ellie was doing great in adjusting to life in Wyoming, and Joel felt he could finally do something for himself; you were tempting enough that he wanted to be selfish. He liked that you didn’t reek of desperation or made him feel pressured, neither of you doing anything that made the other uncomfortable. Obviously, there was a mutual attraction between you two, and the flirting went both ways; his head was already leaning toward yours when you went in for the first kiss, which he happily reciprocated.

What it came down to was he trusted you, and you were willing to do things on his terms.

And, of course, as it usually happens, feelings did develop—as his kid got better and more comfortable with living in Jackson, Joel opened up to you little by little, offering a tiny bit more of himself with each passing day and your relationship became confusing; it wasn’t only sex anymore; hasn’t been just that for a while, and it took you both over eight months to admit you’re in love, and for Joel to decide it’s time to tell Ellie, so he could actually be with you out in the open.

So, he left your bed before the sun had risen in order to be home before she woke up—that way, she wouldn’t be confused by his absence. He also planned on talking to her about what was going on between you two.

There’s this ritual he does before he leaves each morning that you’ve chalked up to him being from a different time and big on manners; your two previous sexual partners were closer to your age and nowhere near as courteous as him.

The slightest sounds will wake you, a side effect of surviving, and the moment the mattress springs squeak as he gets up, hours before you need to, your consciousness is coming back to you to assess if there’s any danger. Your ears perk at the rustle of him dressing in the dark, and you’ve learned not to spook when the blankets are pulled up to cover your bare body that gets tucked in. The kiss pressed to your hair always makes you smile at the sweetness, and you expect the whispered goodbye he says before he goes.

This morning, you didn’t expect the added ‘Love you’ at the end, which had your eyes opening and hand shooting out from under the covers to grab his, tugging him toward you. He knew what you wanted, chuckling as he leaned down to kiss your lips. You told him you loved him, too, when he straightened and started to leave, and he stopped at the doorway to get one last look at you under the dim light filtering through the gaps in your curtains from the street lamp outside, then headed home.

It’s safe to say your morning started off pretty great, and even though you didn’t see Joel after he left, the rest of your day wasn’t half bad either; it took a little turn when you got back to your house after working your job teaching at the school to a note from him on your door that read:

Come over

We need to talk

A romantic partner saying you needed to talk was never good, and worry knotted up in your belly like a ball, thinking things with Ellie didn’t go well when he told her about your relationship, and now he’s going to break up with you.

The first time you stopped by his place, you’d made the mistake of knocking; he was home alone and hadn’t known you were at the door until you rang the doorbell. It was adorable how he’d been a little embarrassed he didn’t hear you and pointed at his right ear to explain he had hearing loss. From then on, you always made sure to ring the doorbell, and you did so again, standing on his porch in the freezing cold with your winter coat on and worrying your lip between your teeth.

There’s the faint sound of him yelling from inside, “One minute!” thinking he’s upstairs, which is confirmed when you hear his heavy footsteps coming down the stairs. The deadbolt clicks as it’s unlocked, and the door is cracked open; Joel’s face appears, the rest of his body hidden.

He looks relieved to see you, and that’s a good sign. “Thank Christ, it’s you,” he says, opening the door some more to take your hand pulling you inside. The front door gets slammed shut, and your back is suddenly pressed against it, a surprised sound leaving your throat when his mouth crashes into yours, kissing you hard.

This is an even better sign that everything is okay.

He’s never kissed you in his house before.

One of his big palms cradles your face, the other locking the deadbolt beside you before it glides up your jacket-covered front to squeeze your breast. Your lips part to allow his tongue to delve inside and tangle with your own, looping your arms around his neck automatically. This kiss has your brain fritzing out, unable to think about anything except how he’s claimed you with his lips and tongue so fiercely and possessively while his large body cages you in. It’s embarrassing how long it takes a coherent thought to come through, and when it does, you’re lightly pushing at his chest, the surprise of bare skin under your hand causing you to break your mouth away to look at his body immediately.

A disappointed noise comes from him, and your eyes go wide at what you see.

“You’re naked,” you whisper.

His hand lightly holds your throat as he starts kissing along your jaw. “I’m not naked—I’m wearin’ a towel.”

That’s true. The faded blue towel is wrapped tightly around his waist, stopping just before it reaches his knees. His upper body is entirely bare, with pink and silvery scars etched all over his skin. No matter how many times you see him naked, you’re always so surprised by his broadness—it’s not a trick of his clothing or lighting that makes him appear big; he is that big.

“Still pretty naked.” You remember the thought you had. “Is Ellie home?”

“No,” he says into your skin. “She’s with Cat—” Her best friend. “—and they’re meetin’ us for dinner later.” His mouth is at your ear, feeling his hot breath, and shivering when he rasps into it, “Now, stop worryin’ about her, and let me take you up to my room so I can finally fuck you in my bed—I’ve been dyin’ to break it in with you.”

The proposition makes your cunt clench, and you’re interested in seeing his bedroom—he’s never invited you upstairs.

“Is this why you really wanted me to come over, to christen your bed?”

He pulls back to meet your gaze. “Didn’t want to scandalize the neighbors by puttin’ it in writin’, but yes.” His eyes darken as he slowly unzips your coat. “You comin’ up with me?” His voice deepens, nudging his nose against yours. “Since you’re my guest, we’ll do whatever you want.”

Joel always considers what you want, but he also seems instinctively aware of what you need—that’s the great thing about being with someone so much older and experienced; he knows how to play your body and make you feel so good that you’re happy to go along for the incredible ride.

With him saying you’ll do whatever you want, he’s letting you call the shots.

Your eyebrow raises. “Anything?”

“Within reason.” He kisses your chin, your skin tingling under his lips.

“Is there anything we did last night that’s not within reason…?”

The previous night, you weren’t expecting to see Joel because he’d been taking care of a sick Ellie for the prior few days. When he arrived at your place unannounced, he found you trying to make yourself come on your fingers and ordered you to finish as he jerked off, watching you. Then he fucked your brains out until your limbs were jelly and surprised you by asking if he could come inside you—something he avoided in the past and had only accidentally happened a handful of times.

His head moves to look you in the eyes.

“No.” He shakes his head. “It’s all within reason.”

That sentence excites you. “Let’s go,” you say quickly. He chuckles and helps you remove your jacket, hanging it on the nearby coat rack, which only has a few other items.

He grabs your hand and leads you up the stairs, the third step from the top creaking loudly under each of your weights.

You’re not entirely sure what you’re expecting his bedroom to be like, but when you walk into it, you take a moment glancing around at everything; there’s his queen-sized bed that’s neatly made, he’s got a record player over in the corner with a stack of vinyl records next to it, a couple of landscape paintings of pastures decorate his walls, there’s a walk-in closet not even close to full of clothes, his own private bathroom, and on top of his dresser is a few framed photos—one of Ellie playing guitar, beside that, Joel and her standing next to each other laughing. The third has you walking over to pick it up.

“Joel?”

He’s shut the door, and his bare feet pad across the floor, moving toward you.

“Yeah?”

“If you didn’t want Ellie to know about us, why do you have a picture of me and her in your room?”

It was taken at the town party celebrating the harvest and shows Ellie sitting beside you at a table, leaning into you with her head against your shoulder as you both smile at the camera.

“She doesn’t come in here.”

He’s next to you, and you look over at him.

“But what if she had?”

“Wouldn’t have mattered.” He shrugs and takes the photo from you, setting it back down in its spot.

You turn to face him, crossing your arms over your chest, and his eyes lock onto your bosom.

“What do you mean it wouldn’t have mattered?”

It takes him too long to answer, and you realize he’s distracted, so you wave your hand in front of his face. “Focus, Joel.” His gaze goes to yours.

“What?”

“What do you mean it wouldn’t have mattered if Ellie saw the picture?”

“I mean, it wouldn’t have mattered; it wouldn’t have revealed anythin’ she didn’t already know.”

“How long?”

His face pinches in confusion. “Huh?”

“How long has she known about us?”

His hands sit on his hips, and his weight goes to one side, a crease appearing between his eyebrows.

“I don’t want you gettin’ mad at me when I tell you ‘cause I had no idea she was aware; if I’d known, it would’ve been made clear long ago to everyone you’re mine. Understood?”

It’s said with such conviction it leaves zero doubt that it’s the truth, and it feels like your skin is vibrating at the fact he’s really going to make sure all of Jackson knows that you’re together now.

You smile. “God, that’s hot—yes, I understand.”

“Good—she clocked us pretty much from the beginnin’.”

“Of course she did,” you reply. “I had a feeling she’s known for a while, but since the beginning? I am both impressed and very annoyed. Why didn’t she tell you she knew?”

He grimaces. “She thought it was a subject we avoided...” He scrubs a hand over his face and sighs. “I guess I’m cagey when Tess comes up, mostly ‘cause I don’t even know what that relationship was, and since I never said anythin’ about you, she figured we don’t talk about our romantic partners.”

Your eyes round. “Our? Is Ellie dating someone?”

His hand lowers, and he smiles, nodding. “She said I could tell you—Ellie’s way better at the secret girlfriend stuff than I am.”

“Cat?”

His eyebrows dip down. “How’d you know?”

“Ellie looks at Cat the same way you look at me.”

A long sigh leaves him. “So, it’s true.” He sounds defeated, his shoulders slumping.

“What’s true?”

“When she was pointin’ out how obvious we’ve been, she gave me shit for starin’ at you with, she called ‘em ‘googly eyes,’ whatever the fuck that means.”

You snort and step into his space, wrapping your arms around his neck, Joel’s hands holding your hips.

“It’s this way you look at me, and I couldn’t quite figure out what it was until you told me you loved me last night, and I realized it’s love; devotion—your eyes show the truth of what you’re feeling, and good news, babe.”

“What’s that?”

“You can give her shit for having googly eyes like her father.”

That seems to cheer him up, and honestly, it’s cute.

“She’s gonna hate knowin’ that—I can’t wait to tell her.”

You giggle. “So, Ellie’s really okay with us?”

“She is.” He nods.

“Good—this might sound weird.” You can’t look at him as you say this and focus on a patch of freckles on his shoulder, heat creeping up your neck. “But, um, you being a great dad and loving your kids so much—” He’s told you about Sarah. “—really does it for me. There’s something about it that’s incredibly attractive.”

“Yeah?” He ducks his head to press his lips over your pulse point, peppering kisses up your neck; his hand slides down between your legs where your warmth is felt through your jeans, rubbing over your sex. It makes you gulp, excitement sparking in your tummy.

“Yes.”

His mouth reaches your ear, tugging the lobe lightly between his teeth. His warm breath fans against your skin when he hovers his lips to whisper, “I think I know why.“

Your heartbeat thuds in your chest and pulses in your core to the same beat, feeling your need for him drip into your panties.

“W-why?”

He speaks in a huskier tone, “You know that havin’ my babies means they’d get a good father, and you have nothin’ to worry about when I fill your perfect little pussy with my come.”

Pleasure cuts through you sharp as a knife, and you moan.

“Yeah, I know you like it—is that what you want tonight, sweetheart? Want me to stuff you full?”

What he’s saying is making your skin so hot that your clothes are stifling, and you want him more than anything; you need him to ease the ache in your center.

“God, yes.”

“Then I’ll give it to you.”

You’re wondering what’s changed that suddenly has him unbothered about the possibility of getting you pregnant when he actively tried to prevent it previously—something you’ll have to inquire about later because it seems Joel’s had enough talking as his lips capture yours in a searing kiss, and he pulls your body flush against his.

It’s consuming and exhilarating.

No one has ever made you feel the way he does—the all-encompassing fiery passion that has arousal burning like an inferno in your belly, needing him so badly you think you might die if you don’t feel him inside you.

Wouldn’t that be a way to go? Dying of desperation from not getting Joel Miller’s dick—sounds kind of nice compared to the alternatives in today’s world.

You’ve also never been with someone his age.

There was this girl a little older than you that you met on your travels—you don’t find very many friendly people out in the wilds, and she joined you for maybe a week before she headed west toward Seattle. She told you one evening, as you sat by a fire under the stars together, that hands down, the best sex she ever had was with an older guy who was in his early thirties when the outbreak happened. She went on about how generous he was in actually making her come and that he knew exactly what to do; the entire experience was apparently life-changing. She swore she’d never get with anyone younger again, and you were intrigued.

When you asked her if it was weird fucking a guy old enough to be her father, she gave you a funny look, and you’ll never forget what she said:

“Ain’t nothing weird about two consenting adults having a good time.”

She had a point.

When Joel showed up at your door looking so incredibly handsome soon after you moved to Jackson, the conversation with that girl came to mind, and you decided to see if she was right, and dear god, this man in his late fifties has ruined you for anyone else—he was the first person to go down on you, he was the first person other than yourself to get you off, he was the first person to come inside you; the last one was an accident and it shocked you how much the risk turned you on.

You can’t imagine being with anyone else after him.

The kissing heats up, practically all tongues at this point, Joel’s straining cock beneath the towel pressing against you, and it’s always incredibly sexy the way he knows just what you need without you having to say a word—in less than a minute, he's stripped you of all your clothes, and has you on your back in the middle of his mattress, Joel on his knees between your spread legs, and leaning down, with your pebbled nipple sucked between his lips.

He has both of your breasts in his hands while he laves at one and then the other, the nibble of his teeth on the sensitive buds causing your pussy to weep for him, your fingers clutched in his damp, grey hair.

"Oh my god, Joel," you moan.

He loves worshipping your tits, and if you let him, he’ll play with them for hours; the problem is today, you’re on a time crunch since you have dinner plans, and you want a chance to make him feel good, too.

Your hands tug on his messy waves to get his attention, saying, "Let me suck your dick."

His head lifts, and you're met with dark eyes, his lips shiny with spit. The cool air hitting your wet skin causes goosebumps to rise.

"You want my dick in your mouth?" he asks.

“Yes, please.”

“Okay.” He grunts as he pushes himself up to kneel. He’s still wearing the towel, which is tenting in the front.

You eagerly sit up and get on your knees, shuffling toward him, and when you’re close enough, he can’t seem to help himself, his palms holding your face as he passionately kisses you. Your hands snake between your bodies to unwrap the towel around his waist, tossing it to the side without a care, and you wrap your fingers around his length that’s hard as steel and velvety smooth, feeling hot to the touch.

He nips at your bottom lip when he ends the kiss, and without another word, you’re moving back enough to get on all fours, holding your weight on one arm while your other hand grips around the base of him, and then he’s in your mouth—his girth has you opening as wide as you can, your lips stretching to their limit. He’s heavy on your tongue, taking more and more of him as you bob your head.

“That’s it, baby,” he groans. “Fuckin’ love that mouth of yours.”

Saliva is dribbling down his shaft, lubricating every stroke of your palm over what can’t fit in your mouth, his large hand guiding your head up and down his dick.

“Spit on it,” he commands. You hover your lips over him, gathering saliva on your tongue, and looking up at him through your lashes as you let it drip onto the tip of him—his pupils are blown so wide, there’s hardly any brown remaining, a gorgeous pink flush crawling up his chest and neck to paint his stubbled cheeks.

He’s watching you, his chest rumbling when you take him back into your mouth and fondle his sack in your palm.

When you first met, you were pretty inexperienced when it came to sex—you’d only slept with two men, and it hadn’t been very pleasurable on either occasion. Then Joel came along and showed you how good it could be and let you experiment to figure out what you did and didn’t enjoy. He also walked you through what he liked, which is why you know how he’s going to respond as you suck him off and gently tug on his balls. “Fuucckk,” he says in a drawn-out moan, and it has electricity dancing down your spine that you’re making him feel so good.

You go back to jerking him, your hand moving easily, twisting on the upstroke along his spit-slick cock, while bobbing your head, feeling him slide along the broad flat of your tongue to hit the back of your throat—you’re making appreciative noises that vibrate against his skin, loving him in your mouth, and how vocal he is in his enjoyment, Joel groaning, his breaths getting heavier, and slowly thrusting his hips.

You come off of him, licking a stripe from root to tip, tracing a bulging vein with your tongue, and circling the sensitive edges of the head. His cock throbs in your hand as you hold it out of the way to go lower and suck one of his balls into your mouth, massaging it with your tongue before giving the second the same treatment.

His voice is a deep baritone, the words thick with desire. “You’re so fuckin’ good to me.”

Licking back up, you swirl around the tip and sink down again, hollowing your cheeks.

His hand easily covers yours low on his shaft to keep it and himself still, his other palm going to the back of your head. “Choke on it, baby—take it down that pretty throat.”

This time when he fills your mouth and hits the back of your throat, you relax, swallowing around him, taking as much of him into the tight space as you can, and there’s enough of him that won’t fit for your fingers to wrap around—his other hand clutches your hair as he keeps your head from moving, your eyes watering, drool spilling from the corners of your lips, while his hard cock fills your throat. You’re doing the best you can to breathe through your nose.

He’s panting. “That’s fuckin’ it—so fuckin’ beautiful with my dick down your throat.” His fingers go around your neck to feel it bulge. “You love havin' my cock fillin' you, don’t you? Your pussy, your throat, you're hungry for it and can't get enough 'cause no one can make you feel as good as I do, isn’t that right?” You moan in agreement, his shaft pulsing on the flat of your tongue. “God, you make the prettiest noises for me.”

You swallow around him, and his punched-out groan has your cunt clenching hard on nothing, a layer of slick coating your inner thighs.

“Stop,” he orders, pulling you off of him and causing you to sputter. “I’m not comin’ in your mouth.”

The statement has a sharp spike of arousal erupting low in your stomach because you know this means he’s going to finish inside you, and it has you wanting him with every fiber of your being.

He gets you up on your knees, holding your chin as he smashes his lips to yours, his tongue slipping inside where he sucks on your own. Your heart is hammering in your chest, moaning as the fingers of his free hand pinch and roll your stiff nipple, and you’re trying to convince your lungs that you’ll be okay without oxygen for another minute when his mouth suddenly leaves yours. Your chin is still cradled in his palm, Joel’s breaths coming out hard as he shoves his face against the side of yours and lightly bites the apple of your cheek before his lips are at your ear.

The sides of your faces are touching, his stubble prickling against your skin. “Now what?” he asks. Anticipation has you practically vibrating. “You got to suck my dick, what do you want now? You’re in charge—my fingers? Want me to eat your pussy? Or my cock without me loosenin’ you up so you’ll feel it tomorrow?” He smacks your ass with his other palm, and you gasp. “Tell me.”

Joel is very well-endowed, especially in terms of girth, and he’s aware of this fact; unless you tell him not to, he always gets you off before he fucks you, so it relaxes your muscles and makes it easier to take him. Right now, you need him inside you too much to have the patience for any more foreplay, so be it if you’re a little uncomfortable tomorrow.

You swallow before you answer. “Dick, please.”

“How do you want it?”

“Your choice.”

“You got it, baby.”

He grabs a handful of your asscheek, then gives it a spank and kisses your cheek, letting go of your chin to slide his fingers through the slick lips of your sex, his face coming into your line of sight.

It’s clear in his darkened eyes how much he wants you.

“You get so fuckin’ wet for me,” he says and presses two thick fingers inside you, your mouth falling open when he starts pumping. The tips press into something magical you can never reach, no matter how many times you try. “This needy pussy can’t get enough of my dick,” he continues. “You want it? Want me to stretch you open? Make you feel it tomorrow and come so deep in your sweet little cunt I’m drippin’ from you for days?”

He has you feeling so hot you think you might combust.

“Yes.”

A quick kiss is pressed to your lips. “Hands and knees,” he orders, slipping his fingers out of you.

His way of helping you get into position is manhandling you until your hands and knees sink into the mattress with him behind you—he fucked you hard face down, ass up the night before, and you’re wondering if he’s going to give you an encore.

His fingers dig into your asscheeks as he spreads them and spits on your pussy, feeling the hot saliva start to drip, and hearing him repeat the action on his digits, that he uses to wet his cock. Joel slides himself through your folds and presses to your entrance, your hips pushing back enough to engulf the tip of him—a palm lands on your ass with a loud smack, the sting causing your head to fall forward between your shoulders with a moan, his other hand firm on your waist to stop your movements.

“Don’t be greedy,” he grumbles, slapping your ass again. “I gotta go slow so I don’t hurt you.”

You whine because you want him inside you already.

“You’re real fuckin’ needy today,” he says and slowly begins pushing in. There’s a slight burn as your tight walls stretch around him to accommodate his size, the ache in your core dissipating with every inch he feeds into your pussy. “Jesus Christ,” his tone is strained. “You’re so much tighter when I don’t make you come first—you’re chokin’ me.” Your fingers are clawing at the bedspread, your heart’s pounding, and sweat is starting to bead on your skin. There’s one word repeating over and over in your head: Big.

He takes his time; the seconds that tick by feel like hours, and once he’s fully sheathed inside you, you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding in—the familiar fullness satisfies the overwhelming need you had and has something purring in the back of your mind that this is right; it’s perfect how he fills you. He was right; there’s no one else on the entire planet who could satisfy you like he does.

His large palm slides halfway up your spine. “You’re doin’ great for me, baby,” he rasps. “Takin’ me so well. Now, I’m gonna make you feel good.”

And the fact you know he is has your cunt throbbing incessantly around him.

His hands hold your waist, and he does an experimental thrust, your answering moan encouraging him to start moving—he’s slow at first, rocking his hips and letting you feel every ridge and vein on his thick cock as it moves in and out of you.

He’s pressing into heavenly spots you didn’t know existed before him, loving how deep in your depths he reaches. The waves of arousal he’s coaxing from you is soaking his dick and easing his movements.

“God, I love bein’ inside you,” he says and slaps your ass; you clamp down on him, and he groans. “You feel so damn good—fit me like a fuckin’ glove.”

You fuck yourself back on him as you whine, “It’s yours!”

He grits through his teeth, “Yes. It. Is.” Punctuating each word with a hard thrust that knocks the wind from your lungs. “It’s. Mine. You’re mine.”

His rhythm speeds up, a steady slap of his hips against yours that echoes in the room, Joel grunting with each stroke and your moans coming unbidden. Your ass is jiggling from the onslaught, your head is dizzy with pleasure, and heat is growing at the base of your spine, threatening to explode.

This is how you like it, getting fucked senseless.

You squeak in surprise when gun-calloused fingers grip your upper arms at the bend of your elbows and pull you up, making you arch your back, Joel tugging you back each time he thrusts forward, pounding into you hard enough your eyes roll back in your head, and your mouth opens in a silent cry—his rough sounds are slipping through his bared teeth and obscene squelching is coming from where he’s fucking into you at an unforgiving pace.

You’re quivering around him, your entire body shaking, quaking, as he pummels a spot that’s making stars dance behind your eyelids, the muscles in your belly tightening, winding, building you up higher and higher. Your skin is hot and buzzing like every nerve in your body is lit up, a thin layer of sweat coating the entirety of it.

His breathing is ragged, and he grits out the question, “Are you gonna come for me?” He doesn’t slow down. “I can feel you squeezin’ me—I know you’re close.”

His hands have an iron grip on you. Noise finally leaves your lips in stuttered moans, and you’re losing your mind at how fucking good it feels—you’re not going to last much longer.

“Once you go,” he says, “you’re takin’ me with you, and I’m fillin’ you up.”

The reminder has white-hot pleasure scorching in your abdomen, and you’re coming undone, shouting his name as your climax hits and euphoria takes over every molecule in your body.

A choked sound comes from behind you, and you get pulled back flush to him, Joel’s arm locking over your chest with his hand squeezing one of your tits while the other wraps around your throat, his lips pressing to your ear as he raggedly groans “There we fuckin’ go.” His teeth sink into your earlobe as his hips stutter, and he buries himself one last time as far as he can in your depths, whining as he comes—his cock pulses and twitches hard as he releases deep inside you, spurts and spurts of his come filling your inner walls.

There’s a chance you’ve left Earth with how you feel like you’re floating, your brain completely empty of thoughts—you’re not sure you could think if you even tried, let alone move.

You register being laid down on your side and the warm body curling around your back; an arm is over your middle, and your breast is being held in a large palm, feeling so relaxed you think you might fall asleep.

A minute passes.

Five.

Ten.

There’s a loud snore behind you.

“Joel?” It’s embarrassing how it comes out as a croak.

No response—of course, there’s no response, his left ear is pressed to the mattress, and he can barely hear out of the right. You rub your hand along his arm and lightly tap it.

He goes eerily quiet, and you know he’s awoken, but he’s taking a second to assess where he is. Joel sits up a little. “Somethin’ wrong, honey?”

Your torso slightly twists toward him, looking over your shoulder. His eyes are filled with concern when they meet yours.

“Nothing’s wrong,” you reassure him and pat his forearm. “You fell asleep, and we can’t be late meeting Ellie. Otherwise, she’ll come looking for us, and we don’t need to scar the poor girl with her finding out her dad has a very active sex life.”

He snorts, his lips turning up. “She’s not dumb—she knows why I’m at your place every night.”

“She assumes the reason you come over—it’s one thing to assume and another to know for sure, and the second one, when it happens, will probably make her puke and then look at you with disgust for a while.”

He frowns, and you can tell he’s thinking hard. “I never brought women around Sarah…” he says. “I mean, when she was older, she knew, on the incredibly rare occasions I did, that I was goin’ on dates, but that was all. I never had long-term girlfriends.”

That’s something you’re aware of. He’s told you about some of his previous relationships, including Tess. When he was younger, before the world ended, he only had a few girlfriends that didn’t last long and a lot of one-night stands; Sarah’s mom was a fling in his early twenties who disappeared as soon as their daughter was born—she didn’t want to be a mother at such a young age, and only had the baby because she couldn’t stand the guilt of the alternative.

“Oh, so Ellie knowing me and being aware we’re together is new territory for you. How does that make you feel?”

“Real fuckin’ lucky I found someone she likes and who understands that she’s my top priority—the other women I dated couldn’t stand playin’ second fiddle to Sarah even though I was always upfront that she came first before anyone else, the same thing I told you from the get-go about Ellie.”

“And that makes complete sense to me. I know I’m important to you, but it’s different; she’s your child, who you’re responsible for, so she takes precedence. After all the shit she’s been through, it’s great she found a father who loves and cares about her so much.”

He smiles. “And that’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you—you get it and were more than willin’ to be with me in secret to protect her.”

You smirk. “True, it didn’t hurt that the sex is fucking spectacular, too.”

He chuckles, and you find yourself on your back with him half on top of you, happily kissing you.

Your words are muffled against his lips. “I need to ask you something.”

There’s one last kiss, then his pretty face hovers over yours.

“What do you wanna ask that’s more important than me kissin’ you?”

“Something that I need to know after everything that’s happened in the last twenty-four hours.”

His mouth downturns, and his eyebrows furrow. “Is somethin’ wrong…?”

“No, no, everything’s great,” you tell him and slide your fingers through the curls above his ears. “Has your feelings on children changed? Like, in terms of having more…?”

From the beginning, he was clear that he didn’t want any more kids, and it stressed him out whenever he accidentally finished inside you; you’d think that would put him off sleeping with you again, but he couldn’t stay away, and told you, when asked what would happen if you got pregnant, that you’d figure it out and you didn’t need to worry about him abandoning you—the last part always made you wonder how he’d be involved in your baby’s life with Ellie unaware you were together, and the only thing you could imagine was out in public, Joel taking on the role of your close friend your child calls their uncle, which is pretty depressing to think about.

He’s got an arm beside your head, holding himself up, and his other palm strokes along your cheek, his eyes softening.

“A lot has changed since I met you—you’ve turned my world on its head, sweetheart.” He smiles. “I know I swore I’d never bring another life into this world after losin’ Sarah, but Ellie came along, and I love gettin’ to be a dad again.” The fond look on his face is proof of that. “I really do. She’s a pain in my ass, but I love her, and now that we’re done hidin’ and can finally have a life with everyone knowin’ we’re together, there won’t be any doubt that it’s my baby if you got pregnant.”

Something about that excites you that he wants it to be clear he’s the father of your kid—for a second, you imagine what a child with him would look like, and it makes your heart squeeze at the thought of seeing tiny versions of his eyes and cheeks; would they inherit his elusive dimple?

“I know I’m too fuckin’ old to be takin’ care of a newborn,” he continues, “but I like the idea of havin’ one with you, and I think you’d love it. You’re so good with Ellie and all those little kids you teach. I can tell you want one of your own, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

He smiles.

“Yeah, you do. You’d be a great mom. When I realized I was gonna talk to Ellie the other day and tell her about us, I thought this was somethin’ I could give you; it’s some kind of future, maybe not what you deserve, but it’s what I can offer. And it’s reassurin’ you’re gonna live a helluva lot longer than I will, so I know that if anythin’ happens to me, my children will still have their mother, along with Ellie, who I think would love bein’ a sister. So, to answer your question, yes, my feelings on havin’ more children has changed, but only with you—you’re the only woman I’d want to have a baby with.”

This revelation has you beyond excited—you’d love to have a child with him.

“It’s crazy that yesterday I didn’t know how to define what our relationship was—I knew I loved you, I just wasn’t sure if you felt the same, and today, we’re officially a couple and talking about having babies. At this rate, I’ll be moving in with you tomorrow.”

“Do you wanna?” he asks, looking completely serious.

Your eyes widen as you stare. “What? I was joking, Joel.”

“And I’m not jokin’, especially about havin’ you here all the time. I don’t want us livin’ separately if we do the baby thing, and you know I’m almost done remodelin’ the garage out back into an apartment for Ellie.”

Joel was pretty upset the night he came over after Ellie asked about having her own living space. It happened two or three months into seeing each other, and he’d been distraught that she was at an age where she wanted more independence and didn’t want to spend as much time with him now that she had friends—something else he never got to experience with Sarah and it really twisted the knife in his gut. There was no way the town council would give a teenager a house, so Joel agreed to convert the garage into an apartment for her.

“Are we moving too fast?” you ask.

When you say out loud everything that’s happened in the last day and your plans for the near future, it sounds like you’re moving too fast, but it doesn’t feel that way.

His eyebrow rose. “Baby, we could die tomorrow. Life these days is too fuckin’ uncertain to be worryin’ about movin’ too fast, and we should do what makes us happy.”

He’s right, and it isn’t a bad idea…

“I’ll only agree to move in if Ellie says it’s okay.”

Your response has Joel chuckling as he kisses you.

“Wait, I have another question,” your words are said into his lips.

His mouth breaks away from yours as he sighs and presses his forehead to yours.

“I love you more than anythin’, but can I please kiss you without interruptions?”

“If you answer this question, we can make out—with tongue.”

His head lifts, and he looks confused. “It’s not makin’ out if there isn’t tongue.”

“Do you wanna make out or not?”

His expression turns grumpy. “Yes, so ask your damn question.”

“What would you have done if you opened the door in just your towel, and it was Sandra instead of me?”

“I would’ve shut the fuckin’ door—now kiss me. I was promised tongue.”

Snow.

So much fucking snow.

Ellie hated winter in Boston, but Jackson? It’s a new kind of hell with how much of the freezing, white bullshit falls from the sky to blanket everything. On the days when she’s assigned the job of shoveling walkways down the main streets of the town, she wishes the bite on her arm had done her in—a dark thought, yes, but that’s how much she despises doing it.

The only positive thing about getting sick was not having to work; the biggest negative was Joel and how he was worrying so much he wouldn’t leave her the fuck alone. Yeah, it’s sweet, or whatever, that he cares so much, but this guy literally watched her sleep—he sat at the window seat in her room every night to keep an eye on her, and if she woke up, which happened a lot from the coughing, he was there at the side of her bed asking if she needed anything, and touching her forehead to check her temperature.

Thank god, his secret girlfriend came by when she did because Ellie was so close to stabbing him if he asked her how she was feeling one more time; her friends kept her sane the next day when they checked in on her, and luckily, by then she was pretty much over her sickness, and Joel had finally started to chill the fuck out.

That night, she thankfully got to sleep alone in her room, and it wasn’t surprising when she heard the third step down the staircase loudly creak—she’d tried everything, and there was no way to step on it without it making noise—a sign Joel was going across the street.

Oh, Ellie figured out something was going on between Joel and their across-the-street neighbor not too long after she moved in.

What tipped Ellie off was one day she was walking home after work and had almost arrived at their house when she saw the two of them chatting at her and Joel’s front door. Nothing fishy about that, right? Wrong. Joel was smiling as he spoke to the woman, and it wasn’t one of his fake, polite smiles he does when he’s trying to make himself look less scary and somewhat approachable; no, this was a genuine smile, with some teeth showing, and a rare sighting of the dimple in his cheek—it makes her gag to even think this, but she’d call the smile, charming.

Yuck.

Who wants to think about the guy that’s basically their dad trying to charm someone?

Disgusting.

If the smile wasn’t suspicious enough, the moment he spotted Ellie, it suddenly disappeared—why wouldn't Joel want her seeing him being so friendly with the new neighbor? Probably because he was hiding something; she’ll admit it also could’ve been so she didn’t tease him about having a crush, but the thing is, she wouldn’t have, which is really fucking surprising with how much shit she gives him.

See, she’s not stupid; she knows Joel’s made taking care of her his life’s purpose since they left Boston and that he loves her as if she were his own kid; not to get mushy, but she loves the grumpy fucker, too, and she wants him to be happy, like she is—he’s the reason her life is so good now, and it was time that he did something that’d make him happy. So, Ellie isn’t going to be a dick about him putting himself out there because she doesn’t want to discourage him.

Once Ellie was onto them, it was so freaking obvious that they were a thing—anytime they ran into the neighbor, Joel actually talked to her, instead of his usual one to two-word responses, he gave everyone else who wasn’t Ellie or Tommy. Joel always watched her if she was nearby and went over to her house the moment she asked him to fix something or help her—Ellie’s pretty sure a lot of the tasks were bullshit, and it was their excuse to see each other. Then there’s the damning evidence of Joel sneaking out almost every night; there was a night she got to a window in time to see him sticking to the shadows as he made his way across the street, and it confirmed everything.

He was pretty hush about his relationship with Tess—they’ve discussed her in general, and Ellie knows they had some kind of relationship; she’s just not sure if they were, you know, dating or in love. So, with Joel keeping quiet about what he’s got going on with their young neighbor, Ellie assumed he was just a private guy when it came to that stuff, and it was something they didn’t talk about, figuring if things got serious enough, he’d bring it up.

And hey, she’s hinted that she knows by inviting his secret girlfriend to eat and do stuff with them; Ellie’s even attempted to get the older woman to admit they’re together, but she wouldn’t break, no matter how hard the teen tried.

Then Ellie accidentally overslept at her girlfriend’s this morning and didn’t make it home before Joel, and now they’re both aware of the other’s love life. She won’t lie; it made her unbelievably happy that he didn’t give a single fuck she was dating a girl—he had more of a reaction to her getting a tattoo than her telling him she had a girlfriend, and she’s glad he didn’t make a big deal about it, not that she thought for a minute he wouldn’t be cool with her being with a lady since he was chill when she told him she didn’t like boys not too long after they got to Jackson; plus, the guy was really good friends with Bill and Frank, after all—he’s told her he’s glad she never got a chance to meet Bill because apparently, they would’ve caused a lot of trouble together and possibly taken over the world, which sounded pretty fucking great to her.

The snow crunches under her boots as she walks down the road on their way to the mess hall, her girlfriend, Cat, beside her, chatting about their days. Since she recovered from being sick yesterday, she had to go back to work today, and thankfully, she was assigned an easy job—animal feeding duty, which is both easy and fun.

“Shit, it’s Sandra!” Ellie hisses, grabbing Cat’s hand, “Hide!” She tugs the other girl behind a giant snow-covered bush. She peeks around it, seeing the bane of her and Joel’s existence walking up the street from the opposite direction, probably heading to the mess hall for dinner, too. The other woman is pretty far away, but Ellie doesn’t want to risk her seeing them.

“Why do we avoid Sandra again?” her girlfriend asks.

Ellie’s head turns her way; Cat’s wearing a purple beanie and an oversized navy blue coat, her dark eyes meeting Ellie’s. “God, where to start,” she says and takes a deep breath. “So, when we first moved here, Tommy and Maria tried to get Joel to go out with Sandra since they thought she was a great match for him—she’s also from Texas, pretty, widowed, and has no kids. Anyways, they tried to set them up, but Joel didn’t want to go out with her or anyone else. He was super polite when he turned her down. I guess Sandra took that as him playing hard to get, and she hasn’t left him alone since.”

“So, you avoid her, too…?”

“Oh, right—she wants to be my mom.”

“What…?”

“Yeah, every time she talks to me alone, she likes to bring up how I could use a mom, or wouldn’t it be great if I had one to take care of me and my dad—” Ellie makes a face. “—it’s always so fucking weird calling Joel that out loud.” He pretty much is her dad and she won’t correct anyone who refers to him as such, but to her, he’s Joel. “I think when she says that creepy stuff, she’s trying to get me to convince Joel to date her, but we both agree she’s nuts. Like, I overheard Joel talking to Tommy once, and apparently, some months after we got here, she came over to our house and asked if he could fix something at hers, and he went because Joel might be a bit of a grumpy dick, he’s still a good guy, and she kissed him and was all over him—you get the picture—and he got the fuck out of there, and isn’t as polite when he tells her to leave him alone now.”

“He’s made it clear he’s not interested, and she still won’t get the hint…? Does she know there are other single men in town…?”

“She only has eyes for Joel. I don’t think she’s used to men rejecting her, so now it’s her goal to get him. I mean, she’s persistent. If she sees me or him together or separately, she always talks to us; it’s awkward, and I have to tell you it’s disturbing watching someone flirt with Joel so hard—she’s not subtle at all. It’s honestly weird, and Joel is completely over it. I just don’t get why so many women in this town are into his old ass.”

Ellie has witnessed many women shoot their shots with Joel and get turned down, which is another thing that gave him and his girlfriend away—they never openly flirted, but there is a lot of friendly touching, which is out of character for Joel. The first time Ellie saw Joel open a door and guide the other woman inside with a hand on her back, she had to bite her tongue to stop herself from yelling, ‘Aha!’

“It makes no sense to me,” she continues. “This dude’s old enough to be my grandpa, he’s only got one good ear, he’s weird looking, and after a few days not showering, his feet smell so fucking bad you’ll want to chop your nose off—I swear the only reason we didn’t run into more infected while traveling is because Joel’s disgusting stench scared them away.”

Cat snorts. “You’ve mentioned how bad he smelled a lot.”

“Yeah, well, I can’t un-smell him, and it fucking haunts me.” She shudders. “Now, back on topic, Sandra creeps Joel and me the fuck out, and I’m positive his secret girlfriend would’ve murdered her by now if she wasn’t a secret.”

“Hopefully, Sandra will back off now that Joel’s relationship is no longer a secret.”

“That’d be so nice, but I’m not getting my hopes up.”

“I know you’ve never said anything, but does it bother you how young his girlfriend is?”

Ellie’s eyebrows furrow. “Why would it bother me?” she asks. “She’s an adult and can do whatever she fucking wants. I mean, I don’t understand why she’d willingly choose to be with such an old, ugly, grumpy man, but that’s her deal, and she’s pretty cool. I’m just glad Joel got with someone I like and get along with.” A horrible thought comes to her. “God, imagine if he had started dating Sandra, and I had to pretend to like her and not be weirded out by her trying to be my mom? Yeah, who gives a fuck that his girlfriend is closer to my age than his, she’s not weird and makes him happy, and that’s all that matters.” Something pops up in her brain, and she smiles. “Oh my god, Cat—” She grabs the other girl’s arm and shakes it in excitement. “—what if they had a kid? I could be a sister!” That’d be amazing. She’s always wanted a sibling. Her hands go still, and her eyebrows pull together; she’s lost feeling in the tip of her nose with how cold it is. “Wait,” she starts, “is Joel too old to have a baby? Like, I mean his stuff—” She gags. “—you know what I’m talking about. Does it go bad with age? He’s really fucking old.” Cat’s trying hard not to laugh, her gloved palm over her mouth, and Ellie shoves a finger at her. “Don’t make fun of me for not knowing! What I learned in school was pretty basic, so I know how babies are made—revolting, by the way—there’s just a lot of shit they didn’t explain in detail, and don’t get me started on the awkward as fuck conversation Joel tried to have with me when I started hanging out with Dina and Jesse.” Jesse was the first boy her age she befriended in Jackson.

“The one where in the middle of him telling you boys will say anything to get into your pants, you shouted that you didn’t like boys?”

“Ugh, yes, and then he asked me if I liked girls, and I wasn’t completely sure, so I answered maybe, and he said—” She lowers her voice to try and mimic his. “‘Well, shit, I don’t know what the sex talk is for my daughter likin’ girls’—” She spoke normally again, “You know what, I’m actually impressed with what he pulled out of his ass.” He ensured she really understood what consent is and walked her through what a healthy relationship is supposed to look like.

“To answer your question, Joel isn’t too old to have a kid.”

Ellie grins. “Wicked.” She looks around the bush to check if the coast is clear. “Looks like she’s gone. Let’s get out of here.”

When they get to the mess hall, the mood is… weird.

There’s a lot of whispering and people sneaking looks in the same direction. It only takes her a second to figure out what’s stealing everyone’s attention, and her nose crinkles at the sight.

“Cat?” She’s still staring, the other girl standing beside her.

“Yeah?”

“Am I seeing things, or is Joel really playing tonsil hockey with his not-so-secret girlfriend at our table?”

“Um, I can’t tell if they’re using tongue, but they’re definitely kissing.”

That’s obvious—the man and woman are sitting next to each other on one side of the table with their coats off, their upper bodies turned toward one another, and faces mashed together, Joel’s massive hand holding the side of her head.

“It’s weird feeling both happy for him and wanting to puke simultaneously.”

“I get it. Wanna see something that will make you feel better?”

She glances at her. “What is it?”

Cat nods her head toward a table. “Look.”

Her attention goes to where she indicated, finding Sandra clearly pissed off and glaring daggers at the couple making out, her hand clutching a fork so tight her knuckles are white.

Ellie is delighted and pulls Cat along to join Joel and his girlfriend.

“Please tell me,” she says, as they get to the table and start removing their gloves and jackets, “that you guys are being disgusting right now for the audience and that this won’t be a regular thing.”

Their mouths detach, Joel’s arm around the woman’s back while resting his other hand on the tabletop. There were trays of food for all four of them at each of their seats Joel must’ve gotten, Ellie noticing it was chili and cornbread night. The man looks at her with a close-lipped smile.

“It won’t be a regular thing—” he replies.

“—thank god,” she interrupts and sits down, Cat joining her.

“—in front of you,” he continues.

“That’s fine by me.”

He grabs his small bowl of dessert and slides it over to her.

“Peach cobbler!” she exclaims. “Fuck yeah!”

Not to be sentimental, but Ellie knows that every night they have dinner, and Joel passes her his dessert so she’ll have two, it’s him saying without words that he loves her—that’s just how they are; they suck at speaking their feelings, so they show how much they care for the other with random things like that.

“Thanks, Joel!” She ignores the chili and slice of cornbread and immediately starts digging into one of the cobblers.

“You’re welcome, Ellie—what took you guys so long? We were expectin’ you to be here before us.”

“We had to hide,” she says around a bite—it tastes so fucking good; peach cobbler is her favorite.

Joel's expression turns to one of concern. “Who the hell were you hidin’ from?”

Their girlfriends had started eating.

She swallows, giving him a look. “Who do you think?” She juts her thumb behind her. “Miss Crazypants over there, who—” She turns in her seat to find Sandra still looking pissed. “—might be Miss Murderpants now.”

“Stop starin’ and pointin’,” Joel hisses, and she faces him again.

Ellie rolls her eyes. “The woman annoys the fuck out of us, and you’re telling me not to be rude to her? A bit hypocritical, seeing as you’re clearly rubbing it in her face that you’re seeing someone.”

His jaw clenches. “That’s different.”

Her eyebrows dip together. “What?”

He adjusts in his chair to lean forward a little and starts whispering, “I want her to see us, so she’ll get the hint and leave us the fuck alone—I also want the whole town buzzin’ about me bein’ in a relationship tomorrow.”

“The first part of that, I get; the second bit, you lost me. It’s not like you to want to be the subject of town gossip.”

He straightens and picks up his spoon. “Don’t worry about it, and eat.”

That’s Joel speak for, ‘I’m done discussing this topic.’

“Okay, you fuckin’ weirdo,” she mumbles and takes another bite.

There’s some talking as they eat between all four of them. Joel seems incredibly interested in Cat’s hobby of tattooing people, which Ellie guesses is because she told him she was getting one. He’s probably just ensuring it’ll be safe and that she won’t have to worry about infections or whatever else could go wrong.

Ellie has completely demolished all the food on her tray and is stuffed, taking a big gulp of her water. She sets the cup down.

“So,” she begins, “how serious is this?” She points between the couple across from her. “Is this a fling? Is she moving in? Are you guys getting married? What can I expect?”

Joel swallows and wipes his mouth with a napkin, which he clutches in his fist as he lays it on the table.

“It’s serious,” he says. “We wanted to talk to you about her movin’ in.”

She figured that would be the case with how much time they spend together at night. Ellie’s not against the idea, but she also does not under any circumstance want to know what they do when they’re alone. She has an idea; she’s not dumb. She just prefers not having any solid evidence.

Ellie pushes her tray forward and crosses her arms on the tabletop.

“Here’s the deal: I’ll be fine with her moving in under one condition.”

He looks curious. “What’s that?”

“Whatever you guys do alone in the bedroom happens when I’m not home; I don’t wanna hear shit, I can’t unhear, and I absolutely do not want to see anything I can’t unsee. It’ll only have to be like that until you finish my apartment.”

He seems to be thinking it over. “Deal.”

“You assholes gonna get married?”

“We haven’t discussed that yet.”

His girlfriend says, “I’m okay with marriage.”

Joel’s head whips her way, and he genuinely looks surprised.

“Really?” he asks.

Ellie snorts because the other woman is looking at him like he’s dumb. “Yeah,” she answers. “What about you?”

“I’m okay with it also.”

“Great.” She smiles.

It’s nice to see Joel so happy and to know he’s found someone. She always worried he’d die alone; sure, he’d have her, but he deserved to be loved by someone and to get good things after all of the shit he’s been through in his long fucking life.

She glances over at Cat, who’s scraping her spoon along the inside of her dessert bowl to get whatever of the cobbler is left. She’s staring at it so intently that Ellie thinks she looks adorable, and it makes her smile.

“Oh, are those the ‘googly eyes’?” she hears Joel ask the woman beside him.

“Yep,” his girlfriend answers.

Cat takes her last bite and asks them while chewing, “What are ‘googly eyes’?”

Joel sounds a little too happy, “It’s how Ellie looks at you.”

Ellie quickly turns toward him. “I don’t have ‘googly eyes’!”

She wants to wipe the smug smile off of his stupid face. “Yes, you do.”

“No, you’re lying!”

He puts a hand over his heart. “God’s honest truth, baby girl, you stare at her with ‘googly eyes.’”

Her cheeks feel hot, and she wants the floor to swallow her whole. “This is so embarrassing.” She doesn’t want to talk about this anymore and remembers something.

Joel’s smiling. “It’s cute.” He starts drinking his water.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m cute, whatever,” she says, swatting away his words with her hand. She focuses on him, leaning over her arms on the table. “You know what would be really cute, now that you’ve got a girlfriend, and I think it’s still possible at your age, you’re pretty fucking old, though, but if it is possible, it’d be really cute if you guys had a baby.” She grins and nods her head.

Joel sputters and starts coughing hard. It takes him a moment to speak, and the look on his face is a mixture of confusion and anger.

“The hell do you mean if it’s possible at my age?!” he rumbles. ”I’m fifty-eight, not dead!”

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theoldsports · 7 months

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Hi, i want to request a remus x reader, where its a girls night before lily's wedding and they play a spicy truth or dare, where reader realises she needs to ask remus out.

tradition.

FIRST REQUEST SORRY THIS TOOK TIME

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Bachelorette parties were a time honored tradition where the bride-to-be wore heels that were too tall to be worn drunk and got legendarily plastered with about seven of her worst behaved friends. Lily Evans (soon to be Potter) was almost an exception, but Dorcas bought her these platform go-go boots and it felt rude not to wear them.

Lily assumed the event would be less of a nightmare if [Y/N] planned it, as Dorcas usually took things too far. This way, Lily could almost guarantee that there would be no Chip and Dale-type striper dressed as the left-winger chaser from Puddlemere United. [Y/N] was therefore the most convenient choice for Maid of Honour.

Carefully, the bridal party made their way out of the Three Broomsticks and hauled themselves up the hill to do the rest of the night in Godric’s Hollow. All of them were too far gone to apparate. Sirius had taken James and the boys who knows where for a Bachelor party so the girls could use the house that night. The ‘girls’ consisted of Lily and [Y/N], Dorcas Meadowes, Mary Macdonald, Marlene McKinnon, and Alice Fortesque; basically the contents of their dormitory at school. The seven hung off each other and giggled as old friends as they walked.

“Never thought you’d be the first of us!” Marlene cried in glee, shaking her sharply bobbed dark hair out of her face. “I can’t get over it. Simply.”

“Oh, come off it!” Lily groaned. She was awfully tired of hearing this same banter recycled day in and day out.

Dorcas laughed. “Well, yeah. Marls is right. You hated your poor bastard Potter, for, like, forever. I thought first in and out of the binding contract of marriage was to be Alice and Frankie for sure.”

The most sober player of the evening, Alice, sighed. “Sorry that we’re patient.”

[Y/N] let out a firm laugh, pulling Lily’s set of keys out of her pocket as the house entered their line of view. “Bold assumptions from both Dorcas and Marlene considering you both told me you were gonna marry Sirius Black when you were fifteen or something.” [Y/N] said. Her comment illicited silence from Dorcas and Marlene rampant giggled from Mary, Lily and Alice.

With their Godric’s Hollow destination reached, [Y/N] unlocked the door with some difficulty. The seven flooded inside. Before Mary could loudly announce how bad she had to piss again, [Y/N] asked: “I’ve got a quick question ‘bout Black, actually,” everyone seemed very interested because everyone [Y/N] knew was in love with Sirius Black - unfortunately. “How many of you’v’fucked him? Just… Show off hands.”

Many groans of malcontent echoed through the room. Dorcas and Marlene raised their hands without hesitation, but instead with a bit of regret. Mary’s hand slowly went up with a sigh. Lily and Alice exchanged some knowing looks but both resisted a comment. “Bloody hell, ladies. Is he actually packin’ or something? He’s not that tall, so… Nice hair, but if he weren’t one of my mates, I’d just say he’s average. How does he keep pulling like this?” [Y/N] asked incredulously.

As Mary left finally to piss, Marlene bit back at [Y/N]. “Honestly, I think he’s just charming. Like, something about the smile, the leather jacket. Plus, he’s so fuckin’… noble, like. Yeah?”

“Noble? A guy’s a better fuck ‘cause he’s ‘noble?’” [Y/N] sighed.

“You know what I mean.” Marlene said and Dorcas nodded in agreement.

Dorcas piped up. “Well, [Y/N]. You may be the next among us. Ain’t the Maid of Honour and the… What’s it called? Man of Honour—“

“—Best Man.” Alice correct, pouring herself a sipper of firewhiskey.

“Ain’t the Maid of Honour and the Best Man meant to fuck? After the wedding?” Dorcas finished.

[Y/N]’s eyes widened. “No. Superstition. Clearly. I… Right, Lily?”

Lily’s playful grin widened as she pulled off her go-go boots and tossed her auburn hair into a messy bun. “Well, seeing as neither of you have a real date, then have at it. It’s tradition.”

“That’s vile. You’re vile.”

Mary walked back in from the bathroom. “Who’s vile?”

“Lily. Or Sirius. Can’t remember. Maybe both.” Marlene clarified.

“Ah, he is ‘packing,’ by the way. If nobody’s said that yet.”

[Y/N] was tired of everyone pushing her buttons because she had been single for a while. Single, yes. Desperate enough to shag Sirius Black, no. “Fabian Prewett was not worth all the trouble to keep that relationship going just to have a date to your wedding.” She said.

“He was so pretty!” Dorcas remarked, a drunken slur apparent in her voice.

“Yeah, and he was also a prick. Anyway, there’s no sense in finding someone with, like, days til the wedding.”

Lily sighed loudly. She knew what she was doing. It was that sort of sigh that baited someone to ask why one was sighing.

“What?” [Y/N] asked, scoffing.

“Nothing. It’s nothing.”

Strained silence as all the other girls leaned into listen. “Oh, I’m sure. What’s the problem here?”

“James said one of his boys also doesn’t have a date to the—“ Lily started.

“You already implied Sirius—“

“Remus. Rem doesn’t have anyone.”

A longer, more strained silence.

Marlene gasped. “Holy fuckin’ shit. You should finally ask Remus out.”

“Finally? What do you mean finally? He’s my best mate.” [Y/N] said incredulously.

The other girls shared groans of indignation or shouts of surprise. “Dear, every boy you’ve ever been out with looks like a cheap knock-off of Loony Loopy Lupin. You have to have noticed.” Marlene pointed out.

“Don’t call him that!” Lily butted in.

“Don’t call him that. He doesn’t like it. And simply, I don’t think that’s true. About the boy thing.” [Y/N] insisted.

“Amos Diggory.” Mary said clearly. Amos had been her very first boyfriend. [Y/N] finally said yes to his obvious advances after Remus took a Slytherin girl his friends all hated to Hogsmeade. Amos had then been the same height and build as Remus, with those aggressively kind eyes. However, he was nothing like Lupin in any other way.

“They’re both tall with brown hair. So’s James for that matter—“

“Amos is just the polite version of Lupin. They’re practically the same bloke.” Mary finished he brutal comment and strolled into the kitchen.

“Tony Dolohov—“ Lily pointed out. Antonin Dolohov had been a rebound repeated hookup after Amos had broken up with [Y/N] since he thought she was too ‘disinterested’ in him. It was familiar commentary that Remus and Dolohov looked similar. They were constantly mistaken for the other from the back in school, despite being completely different as people.

“Was a fling!”

“Evil Lupin…” Dorcas sighed.

[Y/N] was ready for another topic of conversation. “So what? I like tall brunette guys from the countryside. Sue me. Fabian Prewett was from out there too, but he was completely—“

“Mm… Yes. Redheaded, pretentious Lupin.” Dorcas grinned tempestuously.

Mary gasped. “That implies our Lupin isn’t pretentious!”

Alice cleared her throat amidst [Y/N] evident shame and irritation. “If you don’t mind my saying, [Y/N], you’ve been down for that boy since you were about fourteen. Lupin, I mean.”

[Y/N] watched Lily nod drunkenly at wise old Alice’s words. “Call him! Call him right now!”

“Fuck you! No!”

Before [Y/N] could do anything else, Marlene began leading a chant of “call him!” with others shouting such fare as “come on, don’t ruin Lily’s party!” That was when she had to pick up the phone, just to get it to stop.

She stood there, listening to the dial tone hum. “Shit. What number am I ringing? He’s not… He’s with James.”

Lily whipped out her wand from her back pocket and wordlessly summoned a number jotted down on a takeaway menu from who knows where in the kitchen. Lily dictated the number to [Y/N], just to make sure she would actually make the call.

“‘Llo?” Sirius Black slurred on the other line. [Y/N] had often heard him wasted, but he was gone-gone tonight. He spoke too loudly into the receiver. After multiple semesters of Muggle Studies, he still hasn’t mastered the telephone.

“Black, it’s [Y/N].”

“Hey there, love,” Sirius suddenly sounded on edge. The world was a scary place these days and such a call was scary to get this late during a bachelor party. [Y/N] thought he sounded more sober, or tried, after she announced herself. “‘S everything okay…?”

“Hm? Yeah, no. All’ve us are fine. Is Lupin there?”

“What you want with Lupin?” Sirius inquired, his tone sounding much more typical of a drunk Sirius Black.

[Y/N] looked over her shoulder at the expectant faces of the girls and an encouraging thumbs up from Alice. “Uh, drinking game, or something. Put him on. Please.”

Sirius sounded like he dropped the receiver away from his face and called something like “Oi Moony, there’s a foxy bird on the phone for you!” into the room near him. After some shuffling and unintelligible grumbling, Remus’s voice came through on the phone.

“Remus Lupin on,” he said too clearly. The kind of clearness of tone one had when stoned out of their mind and attempting to cover it up. But at least he knew how to use a phone. “Who’s speaking?”

“Lupin, it’s me. It’s [Y/N]. Everything’s fine.”

“Oh. Hi?”

“Yeah, hi. All the boy’s watching you right now?”

“Uh,” a pause. “No, yeah. All of ‘em.”

“Same here. Holding a wand to my chest, basically. You still don’t have a date to the wedding, right?”

A longer pause. “Hm? To the wedding, you said?” He swallowed. Dry mouth from nerves or smoking too much, maybe. “No.”

“Right. Nor have I. Wanna go with me? Since we already both, like, have to go? Figured it’d be fun to go with you,” [Y/N] dropped her voice to a whisper. “Like, go-with-me-go-with-me. Real deal date.”

Too long of a pause.

“Remus? You there?”

“Yeah. Yeah! Sure, I’m here, sure. Also, like, yeah, sure. I mean, yeah. I’ll go with you. If you want, I mean. Yeah.”

[Y/N] sighed in relief. “Brilliant. Pop by before and get me. We’ll go together. Ta.”

With that, she hung up.

“Ta?” Dorcas said dramatically. “Ta? You ask the man out and you close with fuckin’ ‘ta?’”

#remus lupin x reader #harry potter #marauders #remus lupin #remus imagine #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin x oc #remus lupin x you #remus x reader #remus x you

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spoonful-of-citrus-flowers · 7 months

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Crossroads of the Usher Children: Pt. 1

To preface this: I think whatever Verna is, it's clear that, first and foremost, she’s a creature of choices and consequences. I kind of disagree with the view that it’s off-putting that Verna would be both compassionate and cruel to the Usher children. It does make sense that Verna would be sympathetic because although most of the Usher family (save for Lenore) are not good people, none of that is why they have to die. None of the kids were able to have any say in that decision (most of them weren’t even alive!).

But although Verna can’t prevent their deaths, she can make it a peaceful one – but that all relies on the choices the kids make. Since most of the Usher family doubles down on their worst impulses, she, in turn, is cruel. A creature of symmetry, as she puts it - choosing to act as a sort of crossroads, so to speak, where the manner of their inevitable death is determined by which path they take.

Prospero/Perry Usher: She appears as a mystery guest, prompting Perry to follow her into the bedroom, and tells him directly that there’s still time to stop it, to be satisfied with what the party has been so far (implying he should stay with Verna). But Perry makes his choice to not do so, and ends up dying from the acid in the tanks.

(Personally, I think the last kiss Verna gives him as he’s dying is what she would’ve done to kill him if he’d decided it was enough – just have him die of more or less natural causes during the party, at the high point of being so close to achieving something). Instead, his last moments are full of horror and pain.

Camille L'Espanaye: Verna’s the security guard, telling Camille she doesn’t have to go back there to see what Victorine is doing with the chimps. But Camille does so anyways, because she hates Victorine and wants to find evidence of her doing something wrong – so focused on doing that she doesn’t even realize one of the chimps is out of the cage. Then, as we know, she gets mauled to death by that same chimp.

Napoleon/Leo Usher: Verna is obviously the cat shelter worker/owner, but I’d argue her first interference was with the cat illusion, where Leo thinks he’s killed Pluto while on drugs. This one is interesting to me, because it shows that Verna is deeply knowledgeable about what people will typically do.

Most people will hesitate to say “Hey, honey, I think I might have killed the cat in a rage while I was on drugs last night” and might actually say what Leo initially did – that maybe they accidentally let the cat out. So, his “crossroads”, observed by Verna, was to either save another (or all, even!) of the cats in the kill shelter, but he chose to only get the one that looked just like Pluto in order to pretend that nothing happened to the cat and erase any of his responsibility for doing something bad.

Of course, we know by the very end of the episode, that Pluto was indeed accidentally let out, and appears by Leo’s body. Similar to Perry, if Leo had decided to stop and not try to get a Pluto doppelganger, he wouldn’t have died that way.

Part Two here!

#the fall of the house of usher #verna #prospero usher #camille l'espanaye #napoleon usher #perry usher #leo usher #starting off with the first three siblings bc otherwise it would be extremely long lmao #part two is obviously victorine tamerlane frederick and lenore #yes lenore is a grandchild but this theme still applies to her

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clementine-kesh · 8 months

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oh we're talking about shit with hate? good. i'm having a morning where i need someone to trash talk jean luc picard to me for some reason.

YESS HATER THURSDAY (on a tuesday) LIVES ON IN OUR HEARTS. okay so a while back i made a post about how picard is the most boring captain and i stand by it so hard. this is subjective opinion of course, but the most interesting thing picard did was pave the way for janeway and sisko and the shows that stress-tested the idea of the federation’s utopia. and you know what? that’s fine! a lot of people like that tng presented that utopian ideal to strive for, that picard was the ultimate diplomat who could solve everyone’s problems with a well-timed speech. the problem is that there’s only so much you can do with a character like that from a character exploration standpoint because at that point they’re less of a person and more of a tool for delivering ethics lessons.

now, picard (the show) had the opportunity to deconstruct picard (the character) and make him something more than a tool for delivering ethics lessons. but it either made the problem worse by having him save the galaxy three times in a row or trying to make up a tragic backstory which fell completely flat because it hasn’t influenced him as a character at all throughout the rest of his appearances so felt completely meaningless. the other problem that picard (the show) had was that it was written by picard stans who’ve internalized the idea that any problem can be solved by giving a good enough speech and if it isn’t working you’re just not diplomacying hard enough. that scene in lower decks where tendi’s freaking out and smashing shit while turning into a giant bug and all the tryhard ensigns try to fix the situation by making speeches while boimler is the one who actually calms her down by being silly and making her laugh is a damning condemnation of these types lol.

it’s been a long time since i’ve actually watched through tng so i can’t really comment on that but one of the worst things to me about picard as a character in picard is how he’s never wrong. when ro laren showed up her betrayal was framed as being all about him and the federation and he never once had to actually have any introspection about the maquis situation. horrible decolonial politics but what can you expect from a frenchman. even if everything else wasn’t a factor i’d hate him for that alone. anyways to sum everything up ⤵️

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neteyamsilly · 1 year

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I’m the anon who loves rambling and let me tell u, I love gushing about anything!! If you’ll have me, I literally won’t stop talking!!

Why can I imagine Y/N just mimicking her father being an ass and her siblings just loving it and laughing?? (Ik she totally does the best impressions of him too!! (Maybe even because she’s so similiar to him, too!) (U know u got it bad when you start making headcanons of a fanfic 😭))

Btw Neteyam totally needs it!! He always thinks about his siblings, fortunately there is her sister, but who is actually there for her? (She just wishes for her dad to do his job and console her damn it😔)

I can also see that there is a bit of conflict (if I can call it that??) between Lo’ak and Y/N, both are considered trouble, so maybe they are a bit competitive against each other? Trying to see who can be the better child between the worst? (I’m sorry, maybe I’m reading a bit too much into it (as usual), but Lo’ak snickering while his sister is trying to understand why can’t she go through ikinimaya, while her younger brother (who is as bad as her) did.. She’s obviously a little bit hurt about it 😭 (can imagine her thinking like Lo’ak?? Mature?? Come on now)) (Also it’s a bit funny that the children who took after their father the most, butt heads the most too)

And Kiri just being an angel and trying to shut up Lo’ak..

Taking about Kiri (and Tuk!!) I can’t stop thinking about Y/N having a bit of a grudge against not like actually them, but at the situation and even feel resentment against her dad. Like Jake is so soft with them, why not with her?? (Like Tuk is the baby, but Kiri, too? Why?). (Y/N calling Kiri babygirl (dad’s nickname for Kiri!) to mock her a little bit, because deep down she just wishes her dad called her sweetheart again 😞)

Having such a big family makes the dynamics so interesting!! Y/N has become her own character in my head (I imagine her being named after her aunt Sylwanin 🥺, since some of the kids’ names can be so closely related to someone’s else, like Neteyam-Neytiri (maybe also Eytukan? Or Tsu’tey?), Kiri like Atokirina, Lo’ak-Mo’at (I also read somewhere that Lo’akur was an amulet related to the first Toruk Makto?) and then Tuktirey.. I read somewhere (I get hyperfixated sometimes) that Tìrey means life and Tuk sounds close to Eytukan, also Tsyeyk (Jake) soo maybe (I’m most likely delusional Ik 😭), and she’s so interesting, I’d read a whole book of her!

I got so sad thinking that Y/N first flight was ruined by the Sky People.. She couldn’t even get a good look at her Ikran ‘cause it was so dark, before being shot at, 😔

I can’t stop thinking about her relationship with Spider! Y/N being so close to her mother, I’d think she distanced herself from him (which I felt like Neteyam did so, too, but that is just my opinion!), and her being 4 fingered like her mother (in the film they don’t count the thumb?? When Kiri and Lo’ak were being bullied what was said was “four fingered freak” and it kept bothering me a little, maybe I’m just slow 😭) so she relates less with Kiri and Lo’ak and more with Neteyam, so as a result she as less of a relationship with Spider?

I can’t help but think that he is such a interesting and misunderstood character sometimes, so I was interested in what you thought!!

Btw I love the relationship she has with Neytiri ❤️

So beautiful, understanding and trusting relationship.

I’d write a book to explain what Y/N and Jake’s relationship does to me, like him being so hurt at her saying she hated him, how she picked up only when Neytiri asked her, him being scared of how the relationship has become and not knowing what to do about it.. Like I know only the eldest daughter could get away with what says to him, imagine taking to Toruk Makto like that 🤨(her siblings would NEVER, I’d like to think that they are secretly a bit intimidated by their older sis, like she has no fears taking to their dad like that?? But that’s the thing, to Y/N it’s her dad, not Olo’eyktan or Toruk Makto 😭, and she IS intimidated by him, she just doesn’t show it 😔). I can imagine if the siblings need someone to argue for them against their father, that’s Y/N, if they need something else, they just tell Tuk to go and ask, since she’s the baby 😭

Anyways, I think I rambled enough about nonsense and things that weren’t even that related to ur amazing fic, I’m so sorry 😭

I hope you have a great day!! ❤️

RAMBLE ANON!!! Thank you again for this extra bombastic essay like to think anyone would like my writing so much to elaborate on it -- I STILL cannot comprehend. This must have taken so much time to write out, so grateful to be at the receiving end of it! I'm so sorry to answer you so late! I wanted to do it after I published chapter 3 so I'd have more insight to give about the siblings 💞

Headcanons for MY fanfic!!! 😭😭😭 to think smth like this would ever happen to me LMAOOOOO PLEASE...

but! ur so right. Someone has to be the mimicker in the family!!!! You know she started out with Neteyam and then it spread, AHAH

And dont worry about her! Neytiri is there for her, she's not totally alone - her relationship with her mother is fantastic, which is one of the things I enjoy writing more<3 totally a momma's girl.

NOW, ONTO THE SIBLINGS! I can totally say Lo'ak and her are exactly like you're saying. They know how to have fun the most and forget about any beef in like one second after getting into the pettiest fights ever, and are toxic together -- like, fire and gasoline. never put them together or double trouble, that's why Neteyam acts as alkaline to the acid. They're SO similar. Act like they hate each other too, but in my imaginary sequel during ATWOW, she absolutely traumatizes Ao'nung for almost getting her baby brother killed. She's extremely protective and scary!!!

the situation with kiri and tuk is bitter to her, but she doesn't bear any ill will to them, only to jake. the denial isnt strong enough that she cant see why they cant be as they were, but the resentment that he isnt reaching out to her still remains. the babygirl idea is amazing though AHHHH

I have NEVER thought about where the characters names are coming from and this was eye opening omg.... and Y/N if she was an OC being named after Sylwanin? GALAXY BRAIN!!!!

also yes! even in chapter 3 she only gets a glimpse of his colors, like he's a shadowy blur to her,,, i actually havent decided his color scheme yet HABSDBDBS but her ikran is the sweetest thing, this video is how i imagine his personality 😭😭

also about spider! i honestly don't dislike him and find him so interesting, i just KNOW he's gonna be so important in the next movies. he's gonna get the zuko treatment like i cant wait to see what happens to the fandom after he has a glowup BSDSSJDS about Y/N and him though, i haven't planned it out to the fullest yet but the overall idea was that she basically is neutral, if that makes sense? they don't have much of a relationship. he's a harmless childhood friend who hangs out with her siblings and makes kiri happy. honestly she just has the vibe of an older sister who doesnt want to hang with her younger siblings BSBDSJDS

Im so happy you think jake and her relationship is THAT nuanced BSJDJD its the constipated father who's fed up with his daughter's attitude and the daughter who has the same exact attitude as him BSBSDSSDS they both cant talk to each other. shenanigans ensue

BUT! What I love the most about it like you said is that she is the only one who can and will bite back at him. like no hesitation. not even lo'ak can do it, he's too chicken for that. and like she'll fight jake for a corn seed it's always on sight BSBDEEU

AGAIN TYSM FOR THE MESSAGE I LOVE YOU!!!

#irma mirma ask mask #irmanons: ramble anon

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revlischarm · 1 year

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Behold, Morro for season 4 in the Lego Monkie Kid au!!

Below the cut I’ve put some details about the season, as well as their design.

• So, Morro gets trapped in the scroll along with everyone else!! Inspired by what one of my friends on discord mentioned, apparently the scrolls work for all memories, not just for recording JTTW stuff.

• Therefore. We’re gonna get some Morro trauma. Since the scroll can put you in the worst memories you had/in some kind of past life, I thought, “what better than to hurl Morro back into his misdeeds as a ghost?”

- That’s why when Morro’s in the scroll, he’s gonna be walking around in his old gi from the show. I didn’t give him a cloak or anything for the sole reason of me having a hard time drawing it

• Boy oh boy Morro absolutely hates having to be dressed in the robes of his past. He’s been trying to move away from what he did, to forge his own identity and life. Yet now he gets put right back where he was, at the peak of his darkest times, and MK and Mei end up bearing witness to it, no less!

• Long story short Morro just. Is going to be miserable this whole season. Their past got dredged up in such a messy way for all to see.

• I don’t wanna give away too much since this post is mainly just for Morro’s season 4 design, hehe.

• You want more info?? Send in asks! I will devour them and answer back dutifully.

• Now onto design talk, tw for some blood stains and detailed description of death for a bit

• The only details I’ll really say for Morro’s scroll design are that his outfit is fairly burnt and torn up in many places, due to how he died. Well, more so the condition his clothes were in when he passed away.

- The front of Morro’s gi is stained with dried blood because of how he died, which I personally believe to be due to the kethanol gas in the Caves of Despair. There’s more info about it on the wiki, but the effects I’ve given to it basically are that prolonged exposure will cause someone to bleed out, with blood coming from the nose and mouth and the eventual exsanguination is the cause of death. So yeah, you just. Drown in your own blood, can’t get enough actual air and asphyxiate, bleed out, etc. The gas can kill you in a number of ways I’d say

• Moving past all that…Morro gets longer ribbons now!! He added on a new ribbon, since he bonded with Red Son at the end of Season 3, and off-screen between the last season and this one, lol. Think of their friendship as…fanning the flames. They kinda just hype each other up and it’s very chaotic.

• Morro actually trains with Macaque to learn some shadow magic!! They’re super interested in learning teleportation via shadows because it’s cool as hell, and they just generally like to spend time with Macaque. After some time, Morro finds that his eye markings are getting kinda…larger and discolored.

- Surprise the universe/gods saw Macaque taking in Morro and went “oh successor??? The Six-Eared Macaque has a successor??” And long story short, after an initial bout of extreme panicking, Morro realizes that he’s now got some cooler new markings!!

- Yes, I’m contractually obligated to change Morro’s eye markings with each new design at this point, lay off me

- I’m very happy with this marking design tho!! It looks very nice and is easy for me to draw. The markings actually manifest themselves in the way of like…scar stuff. And I tried to have them resemble Morro’s actual cursed markings as much as I could, but it was hard to do that when it kept veering into flame territory (which I wasn’t aiming for). So yeah!

- I also added a little chart at the bottom to demonstrate the differences between the markings and also how Macaque’s and Morro’s purples are different. Mac’s is more on the blue hued scale, while Morro’s has more pink tones to it. There!

• And last but not least, the tail(s) of Morro’s sash got longer!! I did this for the purpose of giving their silhouette a more monkey-like appearance, with the longer sash acting as a sort of faux shadow tail. This works great for any silhouette shots!

• So yeah! That’s that! Feel free to ask anymore questions, I’ll be glad to answer!!!

• Oh also I forgot to draw it in but you know how everyone else gets a cool weapon during season 4 from the scroll? Yeah, Morro’s taking the memory of the Sword of Sanctuary with him.

#ninjago #art #lego ninjago #my art #nsg #nsg au #noodle shop ghost au #noodle shop ghost #ninjago morro #morro au #lmk #lmk au #lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid au

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deathbyoctopi · 1 year

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making a rec list so I don’t forget

It’s more or less a year since I got started in the Chinese series, and I want to share Opinions with y’all!! 😁😁

I’ll place them more or less in preference order, with tiers and whatnot, so of COURSE we have to start with:

GOD TIER (aka. The absolute best)

The Untamed. Amazing. Can’t say much without rambling for six hours, so I’ll just say this was a wonderfully addictive thing to discover. Saw the series and donghua, read the manhua and the books, got me hearing some bits of the audiobook too and I’m going insane with the fanfics and fanart. Dead evil overlord resuscitates and meets childhood classmate, they solve mysteries and go on adventures together, which both isn’t and is an euphemism.

---

DEMI-GOD TIER (because there’s really only one untamed):

Heaven Official’s Blessing. Going with the books here, bc the gods immortal know when (If!) we’re getting a series of that one. But the story is interesting, the characters very likable, the main ship is downright adorable... And what little donghua we’ve got so far was delightful (praying for that one not to be discontinued, plzzz). Twink God with the worst luck imaginable meets piss-your-pants-scary Ghost King and they go on adventures together. Still an euphemism.

The Dumb Husky and His White Cat Shizun: Another book/manhua rec, bc I’m looking just as forward to get the series, and who knows... This one has a base concept that comes straight from fanfic dreamland!!! In the best way possible, too! Reccomending this having read only 2 books so far, but it feels warranted. Evil overlord goes back in time to his youth and decides not to repeat the mistakes of his first life. The mistakes follow him, tho. Also, he’s so horny for his shizun, who he Hates™ very much.

Word of honor. A series so bent on showing everything they can of the main characters relationship without showing it that it may have changed the gears in censorship ^^U I found the story a bit confusing, with a myriad sects and intrigues, but the character dynamics are so fascinating!!! (Speaking only for the series, haven’t read the book). Angsty repentant master spy with a Mysterious Past wants to go die in peace, but handsome leech with a Mysterious Past says otherwise.

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MUST TIER (Very recommendable! I’d force-feed all those to you if I knew where you live)

Blood of youth. A series (maybe a book and manhua, idk) about a dumbass young hero that wants to prove himself in the martial art world, a mysterious youth obsessed with money and a handsome (and also mysterious) monk with almost godlike powers entangled in a conspiracy that reaches deep in the Imperial palace... Engaging story and characters, particularly the supporting roles, because even though they’re not the focus, they’re memorable enough to feel relevant.

Scum Villain Self-Saving System. Books (NEVER mind the very short, strangely paced digital art donghua) about a man transmigrated to the martial art world from a trash webnovel he loves to complain about. He’s the villain there, and doesn’t want to be for the life of him precisely because it will kill him unless he can get in the main character’s good graces. And he does that. All too well XD

Sleuth of the Ming dynasty. A series (is there a book? I’d like to read it) about an official of the Imperial Government who solves cases. No world-breaking powers, no flying swords, just very real crime and clues and palace intrigues (the Imperial family are recurring characters). The main two characters are an absolute delight: the Detective, who is brilliant and socially clumsy, and nevertheless manages to leech off the Soldier to the point that gets in his house and manages to get a lifelong loyalty out of him.

Thousand autumns. There’s a donghua, which is as weird and uncanny as the svsss one, but since the books got recently translated I’m going more with those. Handsome Horrible Man Extraordinaire harasses, gaslights, bullies and almost kidnaps Pretty-Faced Frail Twink, and they end up invariably together. I can barely remember the story, something something Book Of Martial Arts Awesomeness that everyone and their mother wants, but that’s irrelevant. The story is worth it just because of those two idiots.

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OK TIER (Recommend if you’re bored and want something entertaining, but not life-changing)

Birth of the drama king. A half-serious, half-silly series about two warring sects that sic spies on each other. One might be too successful, almost getting attached to the other sect’s leader, because (presumably) they are long-lost brothers. The story is decent, but an absolute point on its favour is the (very handsome, if only a bit lackluster) role of Song Jiyang as doctor Yan. And the fact that he’s so serious, while being the Universe’s punchbag. Seriously, he gets hilariously abused in almost every episode. Love it.

Till the end of the moon. A long, epic battle between good an evil with a romance so strong that can (well, ought to) defy destiny and the will of the gods. If it wasn’t for all the miscommunication!!!! >:3 This one was very difficult for me to place in this list, because what is good about this series is marvelous, and what is bad (boring or frustrating) is almost painful to sit through. Of the latter, the aforementioned lack of talking skills of these two endlessly suffering dumbasses and the epic battles, which do nothing for me, though might be great for other people. And the good things... if the whole series had been like the first ten or so episodes, this would be now in the demi-god tier. The premise!!! The execution!!!! The acting!!!!! Give me the whole early stage of Tantai Jin and Ye Xiwu’s marriage, up to that new year, and nothing else!!! After that, it’s a slow but sure decline.

Stick to the script. An extremely self-aware comedy sketch show with the transmigration premise and an almost surreal beat. The main point is of course Wang Haoxuan, but it also has good puns, quick humor and at least a couple scenes so absurd I had to laugh out loud. But the episodes are so short!!! I found that very distracting, they last only 2-3 minutes each. I enjoyed it MUCH MORE finding a compilation on youtube. It lasts 2 hours in total, so it’s very manageable like that :)

Be my cat. Another series with an absurd premise, and amusingly self-aware, but sweet and occasionally fun enough to be worth a watch. The plot is about a girl who receives from her cultivator brother (who’s gone missing) a sphere with a yao cat, that escapes and possesses the dying body of a young general. The resulting human-shaped cat forms a reluctant bond with her, and she enlists his help to find her brother and the other three lost animal spheres, with their respective yao that wreck havoc.

Dance of the phoenix. A series about a young cultivator girl whose powers and memories are stolen, so she has to fend for herself while attracting an alarming number of suitors, old rivals and admirers. The plot is serviceable at best, and the characters not very interesting... but the effects are quite good, and damn my weakness, it has Wang Haoxuan too!! The ending was mightily confusing, tho. I have no idea what that was about.

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PASS TIER (Watching that wasn’t technically a mistake, but... ugh)

Immortal Samsara. Yess, it’s well-made and well-acted, but the story is soooo slow!!! And soooooo boring!!!!! The character’s actions don’t make sense more often than not, she subtleties of their behaviour clashes with some very drastic and unreasonable course of action, the lack of communication in this one is downright painful to behold... Only the second third gets a bit interesting, the stakes are higher and the characters finally less stiff and more enjoyable, but bloody hell... It’s not worth it, not at all.

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ddejavvu · 2 years

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See when you said lawyer AU I just feel like in another universe Steve Harrington let his parents' influence and wealth control his career choices and ends up stuck in a job he hates just to make them happy. But maybe there's a reason he starts enjoying going to work, whether it's a client or a colleague?

I am in fact atrocious at requesting things because of my deep fear of rejection 🙃 however, please consider my request for something in this vain for the multiverse monday thank youuuu have a good day

💞

today is multiverse monday! send me any au you can think of :)

don't be nervous!! this was a great request :)

Steve never comes into work with a smile. At least, not since his first day. He longs for the optimism he had back then, the approving pat on the back from his father after the man fixed his slightly off-kilter tie. Now he walks into work the same way he would purgatory, hoping for the best but expecting the worst.

He's not even sure if he does expect the best anymore, actually. He's gotten to into the monotonous routine of getting up, going to work, eating a bland breakfast from the lunchroom, sitting behind his desk, and working on cases, that he's not sure he's even hopeful to get out anymore. He's resigned to spending the rest of his life here, behind the smooth wooden desk, eyes glazed over as he reads lawsuit details.

It's the smell of a muffin that first alerts him to a change in the office. His coworkers are all older folks, on health kicks to try and preserve their energy throughout the day. No one ever brings muffins in, much less chocolate ones.

He tries waving the thought away, or rather the smell, because he’s not too interested in which of his cubicle neighbors has decided to indulge themselves. A small quiver comes from his stomach and he wraps an arm around it, willing away his hungry thoughts.

Then a paper plate is set on his desk, he notices out of the corner of his eye. He glanced up in surprise, meeting eyes with the prettiest pair he’s ever seen. His lips part, mouth hung ever-so-slightly agape at you as you stand before him, muffin in hand.

“Hi there,” you greet jovially, pushing the muffin towards him on the plate, “I’m Y/N. Working as an attorney here. It’s my first day!” You gush with a proud smile, “So I thought I’d come and meet my coworkers.”

“I’m Steve,” He manages after a bout of stunned silence, “It’s- uh, it’s nice to meet you, Y/N.”

“I figured you’d be kinda tired of the food in there,” You motion to the break room and it’s oatmeal, “I picked up an extra muffin on my way here! You’re welcome to it, if you want.”

He stares down at the muffin, still steaming and gooey and warm. It’s a very stark contrast from the bruised apples he finds in the fridge down the hall, and he decides that you’ve got excellent taste in pastries.

“Thank you,” He smiles at you, the beauty spots on his cheeks shifting with the expression, “Where do you sit?”

“Here,” You gesture to the cubicle directly across from his, and if he peers over the little wall he can see your bag at your desk, “I suppose we’re neighbors.”

“We are.” He grins, breaking off a piece of the muffin and popping it into his mouth, “Thanks again, neighbor.”

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ellakomskaikru · 2 years

Note

I saw your list of ships that you like and dislike. You explained why you dislike M@iko and I agree with all your reasons. It’s the absolute worst relationship in the entire series. I literally can’t stand it. You said you that don’t like K@taang either. I wouldn’t say I like the ship but I don’t dislike it either. I’d like to know your reasons for disliking K@taang.

Hello anon!

You are correct. I do not like Kat.aang. In fact, it makes me very uncomfortable as a woman. Now, just to get this out of the way, before the accusations start. I do not hate Aang. I have so much sympathy, empathy, and compassion for him. The poor child lost his entire people and culture, was frozen in an iceberg for a century, and woke up to world ravaged by the Fire Nation that could only be saved by him. That’s absolutely awful, and he still managed to remain a good person and save the world despite the immense pressure. I want him to be happy. But all of that does not entitle him to Katara’s romantic affection. And that was the way Kat.aang was written. I anticipate this will be fairly long, so everything else will be below the cut.

It was understandable that Aang had a crush on Katara. She was the first girl he’d seen in a hundred years. She was always there to comfort him and help him. And she was pretty. He did appreciate her and support her at times. But Katara did not seem to even notice his crush on her and just saw him as a friend and even mothered him, until The Fortunteller Episode, which was supposed to really begin to set up Kat.aang. Ironically, that is the episode that completely put me off Kat.aang.

The writers clearly wanted us to sympathize with Aang failing to get Katara to notice him in a romantic way. It did not focus on Katara’s feelings. It was all about Aang’s desires. Then when we did hear what Katara desired in a partner, someone tall and handsome, which is a description that did not fit Aang, then she later looked like she was beginning to consider Aang as a romantic interest after Sokka called Aang a powerful bender. That really rubbed me the wrong way. To me, it looked like the message that was sent was that women should lower their standards and accept dating less attractive men, while men should be entitled to attractive women.

During that same episode, Meng had a crush on Aang, but she learned to accept rejection unlike Aang, who was rewarded by the narritive for having a crush on Katara even though it doesn’t look like she reciprocates. The Fortuneteller Episode sent the message of, “Katara is an idiot for not realizing how great of a guy Aang is because she’s such a shallow teenage girl who only cares about looks, but later that will change.” So I feel like it shamed women for having preferences, but rewarded men for having preferences. For me, that’s when Kat.aang shifted from feeling like an innocent little crush to a nice guy fantasy.

There is also something about the Kat.aang dynamic that I did not like. I didn’t like how Katara was the only one who could get him out of the Avatar state when he went into it uncontrollably. The writers clearly meant for that to look romantic, but to me it looked like anything but. Katara was put in danger time and time again for Aang’s sake. They made her responsible for calming him down at her own personal risk. Katara also did mother him a lot, which is not a good foundation for a future romantic relationship. The writers made Katara’s feelings for Aang so ambiguous and then on top of that made her act like she was his mother. She coddled him and was always so considerate of his feelings, sometimes even at her own expense.

Then in the Day of Black Sun episode, that’s when I truly started to completely loathe Kat.aang as it officially geared into non-con territory. There is some debate on whether or not Aang kissed Katara without her consent in that episode, but will not be debating that. He did. Katara was in the middle of talking, and he smashed his lips to hers. She stayed with her eyes open blinking in surprise for a while. She did not look pleasantly surprised. She did blush after but then she looked away, as if in discomfort. People can blush due to discomfort or embarrassment as well, not just due to attraction, for those who claim that her blush is proof that she liked the kiss. Then to make matters worse, Aang didn’t even stay to ask her if she had liked the kiss. He just flew away, and they never discussed the kiss again until the Ember Island Players episode.

The Southern Raiders is an episode where I have issues with Aang’s behavior towards Katara, and trust me, it has absolutely nothing to do with Zutara or Zuko. I understand that Aang was raised as a pacifist and he was taught that forgiveness is always better than violence, but Katara was not an Air Nomad, and he knew that she and the rest of the world most certainly did not share his pacifist beliefs. Many Kat.aang shippers criticized Katara’s behavior during that episode, when she literally did not do anything wrong. Aang was trying to get her to forgive her mother’s killer. Of course she reacted negatively to that.

He compared her to Jet for wanting justice. Zuko did not tell Katara that she had to kill Yon Rah, he just was defending her from Aang telling her that she had to forgive. And yes, Aang did lose his people, and that’s very painful, but that is not the exact same pain as losing a mother. Air Nomads did not have family units. They were raised by the community. So he cannot understand the deep bond between mother and child. That’s not his fault, but it’s the truth, and it makes Zuko more equipped to understand Katara’s pain, having for all intents and purposes lost his own mother. Aang later did accept that Katara had to go on the trip to face Yon Rah, but he still insisted that she forgive him, and yes, Zuko mocked him for it. Was it nice? No. But Zuko reacted like that out of annoyance for Katara, and because he himself could not imagine forgiving Ozai for taking away his mother. It was an emotional reaction.

And by the end of the episode, when Katara returned, she did not do what Aang wanted. She faced Yon Rah, she scared him, but she did not forgive him. No, she didn’t kill him. But she didn’t do what Aang wanted either. When Aang tells her that he’s proud of her and assumes that she forgave him, Katara tells him she didn’t, with a rather angry expression, and then goes on to forgive Zuko wholeheartedly. Zuko tells Aang that he was right, but that isn’t true. The writers were wrong. Katara did use violence. She did display her dark side.

She did what she needed to do. She did not forgive the man like Aang told her to. So Aang was not correct, and that episode put me off Kat.aang even more by how Aang was trying to get Katara to forgive the man who murdered her mother. Aang felt uncomfortable with Katara’s anger, “You sound like Jet” he was used to the soft, kind, and gentle Katara who always was accommodating towards his feelings. Aang was shaken when Katara acted out of his idealized perception of her. And I love that episode for Katara. She got to do what she wanted, others be damned. She got the closure she needed. She forgave Zuko on her own terms.

After the Day of Black Sun kiss, I think that was when Aang truly began to feel entitled to Katara, and he hadn’t even asked her how she felt about him in return. I think he had the mentality of, “I’m the Avatar so she’ll have to come around sooner or later.” So when time passed after the kiss and Katara did not automatically become his girlfriend, Aang began to show his entitlement issues towards Katara during the Ember Island Players episode. During the play, Aang showed some alarming possessive behavior in regards to Katara.

He angrily nodded when an actor on stage said, “I thought you were the avatar’s girl.” That made me so uncomfortable. Katara and him had not even discussed their potential romantic feelings. But Aang still viewed Katara as his without any regard for her feelings. Then when Aang and Katara talk in the balcony, Katara looks so uncomfortable. She has her arms crossed and she plays with her hair in discomfort. It reminded me of a similar situation I went through in my own life. I felt so bad for Katara, and I related to her as a fellow woman who has dealt with pushy men. When Katara told Aang that he was overreacting and he said that “If my chakra wasn’t locked I would be in the Avatar state” I actually felt alarmed and scared for Katara. Aang said that he would go into what is essentially an all powerful destructive God-mode because an actor playing Katara said that she viewed him as a brother.

Then Aang went on to say that he thought him and Katara were going to be together after the kiss at the invasion, to which Katara had no comment. It was honestly as if she had forgotten about the kiss entirely, which again, is not a good foundation for a future romantic relationship. Aang’s immaturity really showed. He was a 12 year old who did not understand that the feelings of the other person were important as well in a romantic relationship. And people defend him with “He’s 12! What do you expect?“ Well, exactly. If he thinks he is entitled to a girl’s affection after one kiss that wasn’t even discussed after, then he is not old enough to be in a romantic relationship. Then Katara told Aang that she “didn’t know” and that “it isn’t the right time” and that “she’s confused” for some reason, Aang took this as permission to kiss her, to which she rightfully got angry at. I thought I couldn’t hate Kat.aang more than I already did by that point, but I was wrong.

Yes, they did show Aang calling himself an idiot for kissing her. But that isn’t enough. It was narratively framed as the writers wanting us to feel more sorry for Aang than Katara. I felt the message was “Yes, Aang was wrong to kiss her, but aw poor Aang! He just loves her so much!” Not, “Poor Katara, who got kissed without her consent for the second time by a boy who is supposed to be her best friend.” After Katara ran away, the camera stayed on Aang instead of following Katara to show her more negative reaction. We were meant to sympathize more with Aang than Katara, and that really rubbed me the wrong way. There should have been a scene that showed Aang apologizing to Katara and showing that he truly learned that it is wrong to kiss someone without their consent. But there was no such scene.

Then after that, there was no more discussion about Kat.aang. There was no focus on Katara’s feelings. In the finale, after Aang saved the world, Katara magically knew that she liked Aang back, and went to make out with him on a balcony. We did not see Katara’s reasons for doing that. And no, I don’t buy the excuse of, “Katara liked Aang back, she just didn’t want to be with him because of the war.” Because if that was so, she would have just told him that. But she didn’t. It was hard for me to interpret that scene as anything but Katara being handed to Aang as a trophy for saving the world. To me, Kat.aang read as a nice guy fantasy for men who do not feel as attractive and who have been rejected by attractive women. It is not Aang’s fault. It is the writers for writing it that way.

The romantic relationship as a whole made me deeply uncomfortable. Other women have spoken out about how Kat.aang also made them uncomfortable, and have been rudely shut down by Kat.aang fans, because some of them shipped Zutara, as if that somehow invalidates our discomfort with Kat.aang. It doesn’t. When Zuko chased Aang and by default Katara, he was her enemy. He was not supposed to be nice. But when Aang kissed Katara without her consent and did not care about her feelings, he was her friend. A friend is supposed to respect you. To value what you want. And Aang didn’t do that. To me, that is worse.

I understand not feeling comfortable with the enemies to lovers trope. I’m not comfortable with it either unless it is done right. With Zutara I feel that it was. Katara was allowed to be angry at Zuko. His actions were not excused. He worked to earn her forgiveness and she forgave him when she was ready. After that, they developed a friendship based on mutual trust and respect. They supported each other equally. And if a romantic relationship developed from that, I would feel comfortable with it, because they had the foundation of being friends.

Zuko and Katara cared deeply for each other, and that was shown especially during the Final Agni Kai. Zuko initially took her with him to fight Azula with him, but then decided to keep her out of the fight to protect her when he realized he could defeat her alone. Then he took lightening for her at the potential cost of his own life. Then Katara tried to heal him during the fight despite Azula chasing her. Then she did heal him with tears of joy in her eyes. You cannot tell me that Zuko and Katara didn’t care deeply for one another. So yes, I feel uncomfortable with Kat.aang and ship Zutara, and that is not invalid, no matter what anyone else says.

I also did not like the way Kat.aang was portrayed in LOK. Kat.aang was not a multicultural family. Bumi seemed to be part of neither of his parents culture’s because he was a nonbender. Kya seemed to only participate in Water Tribe culture because she was a waterbender. And Tenzin only participated in Air Nomad culture because he was an Airbender. The Kat.aang kids did not participate in both of their parent’s cultures. Katara’s only grandchildren are from Tenzin, and they are all airbending Air Nomads who never participate in her culture. I feel that it wrong, because Katara’s own culture was almost completely wiped out too, and coming from such a family-oriented culture would have made her want for her descendants to be part of her culture too.

I feel that realistically Aang and Katara would have clashed culturally and ideologically. As someone else pointed out before, Aang did show disgust for Water Tribe culture once because of the use of animal skins. He also didn’t like their food, which is fine, it’s a taste, but it is concerning because his future wife is a proud member of the Southern Water Tribe. And I can’t picture Aang being truly okay with participating in a culture that is so different from his.

People say that Aang and Katara bond over being genocide victims which is true, but I think they’d clash more over their different cultures and ideologies on life, and I can picture Katara feeling the pressure to birth Airbender children to repopulate the Air Nomads, which is just something that is so unfair to her. Kya and Bumi canonically did feel overshadowed by Tenzin, which I think definitely says something. I get that Aang was trying to rebuild his culture, but I think it would have been so much easier if it had been done with an Air Acolyte, someone who is willing to completely embrace the Air Nomad culture, so that Katara wouldn’t have that pressure on her and she’d be able to focus completely on her own culture, that was also completely annihilated.

And you may be thinking, “But Ella, Katara would have to give up her culture if she was with Zuko too!” No, I don’t agree. There are many ZK fanfics that portray Katara still participating in her own culture while married to Zuko. Their kids are proudly both Water Tribe and Fire Nation, regardless of their bending. And Zuko and Katara also have more similar ideologies on life. They are both not pacifists and both omnivores. They both come from cultures that have family units. Yes, I’m aware that the Fire Nation nearly wiped out the Southern Water Tribe and I totally understand why someone may be uncomfortable with Zutara because of it. But as I’ve said in another post, Katara does not blame the entire Fire Nation. She helped the common people of the FN and she forgave Zuko. And Zuko himself also was not responsible for the raids. And he would make reparations to her tribe and help her rebuild. Some people think Katara would be uncomfortable with marrying Zuko because of the Fire Nation’s atrocities towards her tribe, while ZK shippers do not for the reasons I explained. Therefore, we are not invalid for disliking Kat.aang and shipping Zutara.

People are welcome to have different interpretations of Kat.aang. But this is the way that I interpreted it, and that is why I don’t like it and why it makes me uncomfortable.

Thanks for this ask anon. I’m not going to lie, this was kind of hard for me to write because I’ve gone through experiences in my life where I’ve felt like Katara when she was being pressured by Aang. To any potential haters, don’t even waste your time trying to invalidate this view. You will not silence me. I send support to any other women who feel uncomfortable with Kat.aang. You are valid no matter what anyone else says.

Thanks for the ask!

#anti kataang #zutara #Ella’s original post #atla ask

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morningsunandnightsky · 2 years

Text

Forever only | Jung Jaehyun

Pairing: jaehyun x reader

Warnings: death, attempted suicide, mention of blood (nothing major)

Word count: 1.3k

Genre: angst

Sypnopsis: Jaehyun was the one for you. In a thousand of lifetimes, in a hundred of ways, he would always be. But to him, you were never even an option.

Taglist: @thelilyshope, @donkey-hyuck, @gangsta-dragon

An: While none of the warnings I mentioned are explicitly described, I advise you not to read this if any of them trigger you. I’d love to know what you think! I hope you enjoy.

The faint sound of your ringtone stirs you awake. Aside from the small lamp on your bedside table, it’s completely dark in your room. The sound becomes clearer as you fully wake up. You don’t even have to look at your phone to know who is calling you. Because the song that is playing in your room is still the same one you set all those years ago. When you first started to have feelings for your best friend, Jaehyun.

He had once questioned you about it, but you shrugged it off by explaining that you could decline his calls without even having to look at the screen. Since he calls you so frequently that it annoys you. But reality couldn’t be further away from that statement considering the fact that every time you spoke to him, your heart would begin to race.

Your feelings started to change so gradually that you didn’t even notice at first. He had always been the first one you went to when things got hard or the first one, you’d tell good news to. He was the one person that could turn the worst day into the best. And the one that would cause you to stumble over your words when there was no need to. He was the one that meant everything to you.

To him, however, you weren't.

You were merely his closest friend. Because he had her. She was the one that held his heart. Even after she left.

Nearly two years have passed since her death. It was the final day of summer before you left for college. All day long there had been storms, as if to foreshadow what was about to occur.

Every time you close your eyes, you can still hear Jaehyun's shattered voice. You had never heard anything more devastating than that.

Because he couldn't even get out of bed, he was forced to skip the first semester entirely. He was utterly broken. And you hated to see him like that, to hear him blame himself time and time again.

She had never told him that she was ill. Somehow, she managed to hide it till her very last breath. You blamed her for that since he could have been ready if she had told him. He could have done all the things he wasn’t able to before, told her the things he regrets not saying. He could have endured less suffering...

You can still see him struggle every day after all this time. In the way his smile fades away whenever he is reminded of her, or in the manner that, despite his best efforts to conceal them from you, his puffy eyes in the morning. indicating that he had been crying all night. He thinks you don't know, yet you are fully aware of everything. You see how he plays around while making it clear that he has no interest in anyone, or how he pushes himself to begin something. Only to come up with excuses that don’t even exist just to get out of the relationship.

You keep telling yourself that better days are coming and that you’ll both be able to go back to the days you were happy. Maybe one day everything will be fine...

Before answering the phone, you hastily glance at the clock.

03:00 am.

Despite the fact that he woke you up at three in the morning, you can't help but smile as you wonder why he called you at such a late hour. The smile, however, vanishes as soon as you hear his voice, and you feel a drop in your stomach. Just like the day he called to tell you that she was gone. You recognise the exact tone in his voice that you had hoped to never hear again. You leap from your bed in alarm. Panic washes over your body, and you can hear your heartbeat in your ears.

“I’m sorry y/n, but I can’t do this anymore...” you hear him say in between sobs.

“Jaehyun what do you mean? What are you doing? Where are you?” you keep asking but he doesn’t answer.

“Thank you for being by my side all this time...let’s meet again someday, somewhere. Goodbye y/n.”

Your eyes are tearing up as you shout at him incoherently, but all you can hear is the sound of the call disconnecting. Immediately after it comes a piercing silence so heavy it consumes you whole.

Without even thinking about putting on shoes or a jacket, you dash out of your apartment. You can only imagine one location, the same location from which his voice was being echoed by the waves.

You step on something hard, and your foot immediately begins to hurt. Your sock is getting soaked as the blood drains out. But since he occupies every thought in your body, you hardly realise it. The chilly air starts to burn your lungs, making each stride seem like an eternity. It hurts as much as if someone were suffocating you, yet it still doesn't feel as bad as the ache your heart is feeling.

You sprint up to the cliff and can now see the bottomless sea. You scan the area quickly to see if you can find him anywhere. But everything is hidden from your view by the darkness of the night. Your face is covered in tears, which only makes it harder for you to see.

You yell for him as you sprint down to the shore. Only the roaring of the sea, though, reacts to you.

You eventually locate him after running the entire length of the beach. He emerges from the sea as you watch him. His hair is getting in his eyes, and his clothes are sticking to him. He just makes it onto the sand before collapsing. Just before he is about to fall down, you hurry over to him and grab him. Not for a second caring about getting wet or about how you are shivering so hard that you can feel it in your bones.

Your lips let out a shaky breath that you had been keeping in the entire time.

Jaehyun is sobbing uncontrollably while shaking in your arms. You cling to him so firmly as you close your eyes and cry alongside him. afraid that if you let go, he would disappear.

His raspy voice finally reaches your ears through the chilly air after what feels like ages.

"Y/n, I-I don't deserve her. I don’t even have the courage to go to her.”

The more he speaks, the more it hurts. to the point of being unbearable.

You want to yell at him, tell him you don't care, and then leave.

But you are unable to, as if you are frozen. Because you couldn't hurt him back, no matter how painful it was. So, you simply keep him close to you in the hopes and dreams that his physical presence will lessen the suffering.

You wish you could shower him with all of your love. to completely fill his heart, leaving no room for anything else. You only want to relieve him of all his sorrow and give him everything he craves.

But a strange feeling comes over you as you glance down and see the brokenness in his eyes. It has a calm or understanding touch to it. Perhaps it’s letting go...or maybe your heart has just reached its full capacity because the pain has become so deep that you feel numb.

His eyes, that never even once looked at you even in this very moment. Tell you you’ll never, ever be what he needs. That there never will be a place for you in his heart. And that you’ll never mean as much as he means to you.

Because you will never be her, his forever only.

#jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun angst #jaehyun imagines #nct #nct 127 #jaehyun #nct scenarios #nct angst #nct 127 imagines #nct oneshot #jaehyun x reader #jung jaehyun #nct127 angst #nct au #nct drabbles #nct 127 scenarios #nct x reader #nct jaehyun

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charmercharm3r · 1 year

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Violent Delights, Chapter Two: By the Hand of the King

HHJ

Masterlist, Story Masterlist

Chapter Word Count: 3.9k

Story Synopsis: Worlds that were never meant to collide, caught in political and emotional turmoil taken for the worst. But even the destruction of kingdoms that followed couldn't have stopped him burning down the world for the mortal that made his mouth water in thirst and dead heart beat.

Warnings: mentions of blood, vampire!hyunjin, witch!reader, eventual smut, themes of vampirism, family problems, probably very inaccurate representation of how medieval hierarchy actually works, a sappy confession

Previous Chapter, Next Chapter

Hyunjin has never hated himself more than he did now, standing across the room from you, who had never been more embarrassed. With his back against the wall, Hyunjin kept his face towards the ground in an attempt to avoid looking at you, the flush on your cheeks too inviting.

Hands folded politely in front of him, he listened intently to the quiet conversation between Jisung and his father to distract himself from your rapid heart beating through the dining hall.

“You are going to be accompanying me to tomorrow’s meeting. It’s time you start learning about the realm’s political matters,” the King spoke to his son, bringing a glass cup filled with O-Neg to his lips.

“Father, I already understand politics. It’d be more useful for me to attend hunting lessons,” Jisung retorted with half his attention on the prettily plated fruits in the center of the table.

“Not tomorrow, you will be joining me. The council has been awaiting my answer on the realm’s inflation and I’d like your opinion.”

“So ask me my opinion now, not in front of your pretentious councilmen just so they can sit there and whisper about how irrelevant my opinion even is.” The room was silent besides the occasional cricket chirping.

It was the same conversation every meal time, the King telling the Prince to be more princely and Jisung wanting nothing to do with it, resulting in another squabble and someone angrily storming out— who it is just depends on the discussion for the night. This time, the focus shifts quickly from Jisung to Princess Yeji.

“Just do as you’re told for once, will you?” Yeji interjected, raising an eyebrow at her brother. Her voice made your ears perk up, the hem of your dress seemingly less interesting now. Unintentionally— or maybe subconsciously— your eyes fell across the dining room on a particular vampire who was nervously failing to melt into the walls. Hyunjin looked anywhere but you, if possible he’d be just as red in the face except out of humiliation instead.

Burning in the back of your throat, you wanted to get his attention somehow. Why was he avoiding you? Why couldn’t he even look in your general direction? Did you repulse him that much? Disgust laced his features, you could see Hyunjin biting the inside of his cheek, the same face he made when he had to sit with Jisung while he feasted on his weekly blood donations.

A loud thump followed by the clattering of metal dishes echoed throughout the stone room, the center of the commotion being the wooden table. Yeji was sitting prim and proper as usual, though holding her glass exceptionally tight. You looked up in time to see Jisung abruptly standing from his seat, holding himself back from lunging across the table at his older sister. The King did nothing to react at his children’s squabble while the Queen next to him shot daggered stares at her daughter, but still said nothing.

“Stay out of this,” Jisung was biting his tongue. “Go run off to the garden and continue playing pretend with the family witch. That’s all you’re good for.” All the eyes in the room turned to Yeji, with you in her background, suddenly feeling uneasy in the vicinity of so many vampires. Your gaze flickered around the room, unsure of where to look and ultimately settling back to the floor again.

Even under all the crushing attention, Yeji’s cool demeanor didn’t falter. Raising the cloth napkin to her lips and dabbing, she cleared her throat. “Play pretend, brother? Is that what I do?” Unbothered, she smiled up at her fuming sibling. From behind Jisung, Hyunjin took a step closer towards the Prince. “If that’s what you tell yourself to make you feel better, then sure. I play pretend. I also attend all of my classes, have brunch with mother, go to war meetings with father, pick up all of your slack in the council gatherings because my inadequate little brother can’t be bothered to take his role within the hierarchy seriously. So forgive me if I enjoy spending time with my friend in the garden.”

Silence filled the hall again, but you could hear your heart pumping loudly in your chest. If you could hear it, so could every other vampire within a mile. It wasn’t the tension between the two siblings that made your brain race, but rather that Princess Yeji thought of you as more than just an ear to spill her problems to. She thought of you as a companion, someone she could rely on. And it was the most warming acknowledgement you’d ever received, in front of her mother and father at that. But how inappropriate it was for you to be reacting in their presence, not that the Princess or Prince minded. The King shot you one quick, cold side eye and you forced yourself to control the muscle that kept you alive. With the burning in your cheeks, towards the floor did your head fall.

Prince Jisung scoffed, looking at his mother. The Queen understood her son better than most, sometimes better than he understood himself. When her eyes softened and she slowly, silently shook her head no, Jisung stormed off angrily.

“Why can’t we have one meal together without someone leaving prematurely?” The King muttered, not directly at anyone but intended for all ears to hear.

“Because you force him to be someone he isn’t,” the Queen shot her head at her husband, delicately red painted lips flattening into an exasperated line.

He didn’t mean to, but Hyunjin let himself glimpse at you, tracing the pattern of the floor in your head. In the King’s presence, he didn’t allow for more than a millisecond to indulge in the sound of your heartbeat. Guilt paraded beneath his icy skin, but why, he couldn’t understand. Sorrow lingered as well, a tinge of desperation, and a bucket of self-loathing, Hyunjin straightened his posture and waited.

“Don’t talk to me about our children’s issues, Hyesung. I don’t have the time nor the patience to argue with you about this again.”

“Issues?” Yeji raised her voice, mimicking her absent brother by shoving her seat back forcefully. She had both her parents' attention, now. “I am exactly who you raised me to be. I am your daughter and the son you wish you had instead.” Not waiting for her father to respond, Yeji threw her napkin to the table and followed her brother towards the exit.

Your only common ground was now gone, leaving Hyunjin, you, and a few other service staff to accompany the King and Queen. Expressionless, her highness looked in the direction her children left while her husband pinched the bridge of his nose. Out of uncertainty, you looked at Hyunjin, who was already looking back. You couldn’t read his features now, something of a cross between sympathy and worry riddling behind his eyes and sad, pursed lips.

It was quiet for a few more painfully slow moments until the King spoke again, “Hyunjin, go make sure my son doesn’t destroy the courtyard again.” Quick, elegant, Hyunjin bent into a deep bow towards the royals and turned on his heel to leave. Just as you straightened your dress to follow him out of the room, he spoke again. “Y/N, stay. I need to speak to you.” Your breath hitched in your throat at the King’s forwardness. Very rarely did he ever address you by your first name, this time was the coldest he’s ever done so.

Hyunjin could hear your heartbeat pick up erratically again, almost making his footsteps stutter as he came to the wooden door. As soon as he was through the frame, he sharply turned and stayed close enough to listen in. It was purely reactionary, almost a second nature to be near you in case he needed to save you from any monster that wasn’t him.

Your feet felt heavy as you took a step towards the table, almost struggling to breath as though you’d just ran miles to get here. The King was a terrifying man, scary and incredibly powerful. Anyone could have guessed from his aura alone, around his wife, he was practically a god. His love for her overpowered his love for his own children, the knowledge made you internally shake as you approached her side.

As sweet as her daughter, Queen Hyesung gave you a short, reassuring nod before her husband continued his rant. “You are given one job,” he started, eyes of the purest crimson boring straight into you, almost through you. “I expect you to do it. Not feeding my daughter fairytales of outside these walls. Her role here is more important than your life will ever be. Remember your place.”

“Yes, your highness.” You gave him and the Queen a deep bow, “I apologize for overstepping.”

“You can go,” he dismissed you before you’d even stood up straight. When you did, Queen Hyesung gave you another melancholic nod, you escaped the dining hall as quickly as your lead feet could carry.

Hyunjin was still waiting, waiting for you to round the corner and bump into him. He’d make an excuse. Yeah, that’s what he’d do. He’ll tell you that he was coming back to inform the King of Jisung’s status. Maybe you’ll brush against his shoulder and he’d get to feel your body warmth again, or maybe you’ll stop to make conversation and he could comfort you. Maybe he–

The nonexistent air was knocked from Hyunjin’s lungs, sending him flying backwards into the cobblestone floor. Heat flooded his chest as his arms instinctively came to wrap around whatever it was that slammed him into the ground. Fragile, your skin warmed the palms of his hands as his back came crashing flat. He was so consumed in his thoughts that he didn’t realize the speed at which you were walking, he wasn’t braced for your impact.

You’d tried to cover your face to keep anyone from seeing the tears brimming in your eyes, not seeing the vampire that you’d body slammed into. Instinctively, your hands came out to catch yourself, despite landing on the person, your palms scraped against the cold cobblestone. It hardly hurt, you wouldn’t have felt it if the cuts didn’t catch onto the fabric of the vampire’s shirt as you pushed off their chest to stand. Muttering slurs of apologies and bending at the waist for a full bow, your damaged hands trembled at your side, not because of the pain but out of fear that you potentially knocked into the wrong vampire. Cold fingertips trailed lightly over the tops of your hands, not acknowledging your apologies but rather the now slightly bleeding scrapes.

Lifting your head and standing straight from the 90 degree angle, Hyunjin’s eyes were laser focused on your palms. His eyebrows were scrunched together in a concentrated furrow, almost pained as he flipped them over to reveal the injuries to both your hands. It wasn’t dripping in blood, but they would surely scab over by the end of the day. You could feel him shaking as he held you, unsure why.

The tip of his tongue poked out from between his lips, swiping the delicate skin and leaving a glistening layer to it. The scent of your exposed blood was making it harder for him to think, the same sweet, powdery florals flushing his nose as he lightly traced the edge of the cuts. “It doesn’t hurt,” you whispered. Whether you had said something before that, he didn’t know.

“I did this,” he murmured more to himself than you. As he pressed into the tender skin, more blood seeped from the scrapes, your scent growing even stronger. Pushing harder, a small, “ouch,” left your lips, getting Hyunjin to meet your eyes.

“C’mon.” Gently did he guide you towards your potion room. You didn’t necessarily need his help bandaging the wounds, but he stayed anyway. He forced you to sit on the wobbly wooden stool while he fleeted around the room gathering clean cloths, warm water, and something to sterilize. Wordlessly, Hyunjin motioned for you to stand so he could take your spot, guiding you to sit on the table instead. The height difference wasn’t much as you sat taller than him now, but just enough so that he had to look up to meet your face.

But he didn’t, he didn’t look at you once since returning to privacy. Even as you winced under the touch of the warm rag and when he wrapped the clean bandage around your hands, he didn’t dare look at the disappointment and disgust on your face.

If he had, he would see you contorted with concern, nothing but carefulness and longing in the way you gazed into his hidden crimson eyes. When he finally finished his task, Hyunjin moved to stand but your fingers on his shoulder kept him seated. Then, did he finally meet you face to face.

To his pleasure or agony– Hyunjin had no idea– you didn’t push him away. In fact, you stared directly into his beautiful red eyes, seeing the flecks of gold come and go the longer you kept the proximity. It was fascinating, how they quite literally swirled within the red, becoming more and more apparent. Then with the same hand on his shoulder, it came up to the side of his cheek, hesitant. The cold radiated off of him, it was soothing under your fire hot skin like you could almost hear it dimly sizzling. His lips trembled when the pads of your fingers made contact, yourself sucking in a deep breath out of fear he’d shy away.

Hyunjin didn’t move a single muscle. He sat still as stone as you examined his face. “You’re so pretty.” Somehow, the paperweight in his chest tightened as though he genuinely felt it beat.

His tongue was caught in a spiderweb as the words refused to be spoken, mind unable to form the right sentence to portray that– no. If I am pretty, then you are the model goddesses try to take after. And even after they attempt to understand your beauty, they still get it wrong.

Instead what came out was, “you’re so clumsy,” and took your hand gently away from his face. Cupping it between both of his, Hyunjin placed your wounded appendage gently into your lap and stood, leaving you breathless and embarrassed.

What had come over you? Speaking such words to your superior, your lord, a vampire. It was easy to hate living here with monsters, and somehow Hyunjin had made it tolerable. Now, you’d humiliated yourself in front of him and he flat out rejected you. How were you to ever face him after this? You wouldn’t, you decided. You’ll avoid him like the plague and tell Yeji that you just couldn’t attend dinner anymore, she’d definitely understand, right?

“I should go,” voice small, you whispered.

Hyunjin peered at you from over his shoulder, a pained smile and fake chuckle emitting from his mouth. When you raised an eyebrow at him, he rubbed the back of his neck and looked at the floor. “Twice I’ve been in here today and messed it up both times, hm?”

Your head tilted in even more confusion, and he flashed a big, fang filled smile in your direction. “You’re being weird,” you murmured.

“I’m being weird? My apologies, my lady. I’m just not used to having to care for a human. It’s like taking care of a pet.”

“A pet? That’s how you think of me?”

He’d blown it now. There it was again, the words not coming out right and he had no idea how to fix it. Hyunjin anxiously smoothed down the ends of his hair and took two steps towards you, retracting his fangs. “Th– that’s not what I meant.”

“That’s how it sounded.”

“I– I don’t–” he stopped himself, scared that it’d make things worse. In the span of one day, he’d almost bitten your head off, gotten you in trouble with the royals, injured you, made you bleed, and dismissed your clear courting signals. How did he end up here?

“Just say what you mean.” You weren’t messing around anymore, judging by your tone of voice. It was stern, demanding almost, though you were never the type to demand anything from anyone.

“If I tell you, you’ll run away.” He felt like he was collapsing in on himself, sinking into the floor and unable to move so he’d be forced to endure this emotional beating.

You let out an exasperated laugh, “you forget how fast you are. You’d catch me anyways.” It sounded quite literal when you put it that way, though there was a much more hidden meaning that no one had to look very deep for. There was no one other than him, no one that could’ve outshined him in any sense of the word, and no one else you’d risk your life for by the hand of the king.

Still, a cracked smile broke on his porcelain face in a way you couldn’t read other than it wasn’t the kind of happiness that met his eyes. No, Hyunjin seemed like he was hurting, just like every other time he was around you but somehow this was the worst it’s ever been. The gold in his eyes shone brighter, almost completely overtaking the red in the reflection of the yellow candle light. It was impossible to look away, somehow even more alluring than his usual sultry burgundy, something you’ve never seen from any vampire before.

Hesitating, Hyunjin reached up to untie the red ribbon that kept half his hair up, letting it fall into his face. He toyed with it for a second between his fingers before mumbling towards the ground, “I don’t need oxygen and you still make it hard for me to breathe.”

Your heart beat was speeding up, completely numb to the wound on your hands now as you leaned back onto one and the other clutched at your dress. It was thumping loud in your ears, probably even more so for him, watching the way Hyunjin turned to face you but kept his eyes to the floor. “How pathetic do I have to be to wish for something as useless as oxygen. I don’t need air in my lungs or a heart to pump blood through my body. I don’t need to be frightened of time because I have infinite amounts of it.” His slow footsteps echoed closer, “I don’t age or feel pain the way humans do. Any magical illness I face, you’re there to save me.”

Through the fringe of his hair, Hyunjin looked up at you. The gold was more than prominent now, so bright you should’ve been worried. It was like he had a torch of his own behind the very irises that were in his skull. Inch by inch, he closed the distance until he was in front of you again, towering over your nervous figure.

“Isn’t it sad, my lady,” the tops of his thighs brushed against your knees, the only contact besides bringing his hands up to gather your hair and pulling it over to one side. Separating into three strands and beginning to braid, he continued, “I have the strength and power of the gods and yet I’ve never felt more weak than when I’m with you.” As his words trailed off and your breath hitched in your throat, nimble fingers tied off your hair with the ribbon.

It felt like the same bow in your hair was tightening around your neck, constricting you from making a sound other than a pathetic whimper as Hyunjin let his hands fall to the table on either side of you. It strung tighter around your airway when he rested his weight onto them, coming in just centimeters from your face. The crimson eyes you were so used to looked unreal now, entirely replaced by the golden amber of this new Hyunjin. You felt uneasy and excited, cautious and daring all at the same time as he caged you in.

Somehow, between the centimeters distancing your and his lips decreasing and the pounding of your heart in your chest you found your voice again, “truly, it’s pathetic.” His pretty eyes narrowed at your words, though not interrupting. You paused, let him sweat for a moment before continuing, “you speak of immortality like it’s a gift. You get to be young and beautiful forever but at what cost?”

“You think I’m beautiful?” He smirked, with his eyes this time.

“I told you you’re pretty minutes ago and you responded by calling me a pet and poking fun at the fragility of my measly human body. I’m starting to think you enjoy giving me emotional whiplash, my lord.”

“Death doesn’t scare me but you do.”

“Being cryptic again.”

“I want to kiss you.”

“No one’s stopping you.”

“This is,” a cold hand pressed into your chest just where your heart lies beneath. The cold of his fingers grazing your exposed collar bone made goosebumps rise along your skin. “This stupid, useless piece of meat that is keeping my precious little witch alive.”

Possession. Claim. His. His little witch.

There was a tint of desperation that lingered in his tone, making you the slightest more confident. “I’m not yours until you make me yours.”

“You’re asking so much of me tonight.”

“And you’re giving me so little.” Adrenaline in your body made you scoot closer to the edge of the table, knees making way for him to nudge just that much more into you. Even through the thick fabric of your dress and his own clothing, it was exhilarating to feel him against you.

“I know what you want. Take your own advice and say it.” His plump lips brushed against yours, hardly grazing and it sent sparks down your spine.

“Kiss me.”

“One more time.”

“You talk too much.” You closed the almost nonexistent gap, softly pressing your lips to his. It was gentle, a young and inexperienced kiss because that’s as far as it got. Hyunjin repeated your actions, kissing you sweetly without pushing it any further. Skin cold but so good, sharp fangs just one wrong move away from piercing your own flesh. But that didn’t matter. Perhaps you were being reckless but you couldn’t help it, pulling him as close as he’d let you. The push and pull of your two varying strengths felt like a game, an addictive gamble wondering who’d power over the other when the two of you knew who was really in charge. A game of wits, if you will. Who had the most self control and who would be the first to break.

Hyunjin wouldn’t let himself so much as touch you any other way, while you balled your fingers into the thin material of his silk blouse. The sound of your lips colliding and breaking apart, one after another bounced off the cobblestone walls. It was too much and not enough, you’ve wanted to kiss him for so long and now you were overwhelmed while actually being able to do it. The only reason you pulled away was to be able to catch your breath.

“I take your breath away too, don’t I?” Hyunjin smirked against your lips, puckering and giving you a few more chaste kisses and accepting them wholeheartedly.

Match point.

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