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shelleysprometheus · 2 years

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I posted 4,986 times in 2021

22 posts created (0%)

4964 posts reblogged (100%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 225.6 posts.

I added 45 tags in 2021

#sherlock - 9 posts

#johnlock - 9 posts

#forethought and fire - 7 posts

#case fic - 6 posts

#mormor - 5 posts

#london - 2 posts

#instagram - 2 posts

#between the fall and the creation - 2 posts

#record love - 2 posts

#fanfic - 1 posts

Longest Tag: 33 characters

#sequels to few escape the gallows

My Top Posts in 2021

Soooo close to the end of Between the Fall and the Creation and In Madness Lies Sanity that I get to start having some sketching/designing fun.

The WIP that is the image for the back cover of Few Escape the Gallows:

And the cover mockups for the entire series (below), each one featuring a different wallpaper design from the set. A huge shout out to @notagarroter for the images and all the amazing wallpaper reconnaissance work.

See the full post

47 notes • Posted 2021-07-18 16:04:46 GMT

52 notes • Posted 2021-10-24 22:40:45 GMT

My beautiful London, how I miss your every breath.

55 notes • Posted 2021-09-04 02:01:42 GMT

Currently on my watchlist are these brilliant fics:

I Wish You Love by @shiplocks-of-love

Summary: "John Watson, professional bodyguard and ex-MI5 agent, reluctantly accepts a job as security adviser to Sherlock, pop superstar, when death threats start pouring in at an alarming rate. As the two men clash over the new security routines, a mutual attraction grows. But danger lurks around the corner…"

Over Fathoms Deep by Bittergreens (@holmesianpose)

Summary: "When the youngest son of the aristocratic Holmes family is shipped off to sea in an attempt to cure him of his poor temper and bad manners, he fully expects to spend a long tedious voyage as miserable as ever. What he does not count on is having his heart stolen by the strapping young crewman, John Watson."

The Killing Principle by @vulpesmellifera

Summary: "John Watson served twice in AmeriCorps, married his high school sweetheart, and then entered med school. A sudden arrest and accusation of multiple murders ends his promising career, irrevocably altering his life's trajectory. Acquitted of his wife’s crimes, John spends the next ten years as the maligned ex-husband of convicted serial killer Mercy Mary. A job offer draws him out of hiding and back to Connecticut - the very state where the crimes were committed. He needs the money, and the job is a dream. Then he meets the brilliant William Vernet, and it seems like he has a second chance at life and love.But the past has a way of catching up."

Kiss and Tell by Ellipsical (@ellipsical-elle)

Summary: "St. Bede's Library takes in those looking for a second chance. John Watson is looking for some peace and quiet in order to heal after he returns from war. Sherlock Holmes is just out of rehab and forced to live in the countryside to care for his brother at the end of his life. When they're thrown together after a one-night stand, Sherlock asks John to keep their relationship a secret. It's just a few months, John tells himself, as he makes a morally dubious decision, but as their electric physical attraction starts to turn into something more, it becomes harder for John to hide how he feels. Does Sherlock feel the same? What will happen when Sherlock's time at the library is up? And will John pay for the secret he kept?"

Bakers with Benefits by @raina-at

Summary: "Sherlock Holmes has a successful YouTube baking channel, but what he really wants is his own bakery. When an old friend sends him a call for the very first Great British Bake Off, he seizes the opportunity to finally win a sponsor for his bakery. Here's the plan: Win Bake Off, get the bakery, don't fall in love with the handsome Army doctor at the neighbouring station. Easy."

The Devil's Blaze by @dulcimergecko

Summary: "Sherlock Holmes, the world’s only Consulting Equestrian Expert, is the individual called when horse owners are out of their depth. At the behest of his elder brother, Sherlock travels to Amarillo, Texas, to investigate why a valuable bucking stallion has seemingly gone berserk for no reason and killed his trainer. The local authorities suspect the owner of fraud and possible animal abuse, but Mycroft sees parallels to an unsolved case from the 1980s wherein a racehorse killed a groom. Complicating the situation is John Watson: bronco rider, rodeo veterinarian, sexy flirt, and one of case’s primary suspects…"

Consumer warning: subscribing may result in addiction, of the best kind!

If you have any WIP's you are are currently addicted to, please do share!

139 notes • Posted 2021-08-03 22:57:56 GMT

Part four of the Forethought and Fire series is here!

This is the story of the return.

At the end of part three (Few Escape the Gallows), John is reunited with a resurrected Sherlock.

Between the Fall and the Creation considers the consequences for their relationship.

Tomorrow In Madness Lies Sanity (part five) also launches as a mirror story of what happens next with Sebastian Moran.

Each week a new chapter in both stories will be posted.

Read them together for double the impact!

**********

And we are done! 🍾

Thank you all so very veey much for joining us!

Given the story arc, it was always going to be an angsty journey, but now that we have made it though all the way through the five acts, we get to have some fun:

"Life is bliss. The scars of the last few months haven’t fully healed but they are no longer raw, sensitive to the touch. Since returning from Ireland, life has been a series of cases amidst the domesticity of their re-established relationship. Working their way back to each other had been difficult. Building their relationship back up had taken patience and sensitivity and kindness - more than they had afforded each other in the past - which felt a little strange, like they had been walking on eggshells - but recently they had started to get back into the rhythm of them. Sherlock keeps making tea for John while still being his normal inconsiderate arse of a self, leaving the remnants of experiment apparatus (and the perishable subjects of his experiments) around the flat. John had resumed grumbling about said remnants while happily making dinner for them in and around the debris. Mycroft has been staying away, "meddling in someone else's business", John says while being grateful for his absence. Together with Sherlock, he regularly sweeps the flat for bugs. So far, they've found none.

And the sex … the sex has been better, fantastic in fact. It has an air of rediscovery about it that gives newness to this next stage of their relationship. In fact, they are, at this very moment, in the process of one of those re-discoveries, sprawled on the sofa. Sherlock sitting astride John’s thighs, hands running up and down his chest, over his button-down shirt but under his jumper. The doorbell rings and they both ignore it.

Mrs Hudson calls up from the hallway. “Boys, you have a client.”

Sherlock shouts back, “Not taking any today.”

John giggles as Sherlock’s curious fingers explore his nipples but does not disagree with the agenda.

“I’m sorry,” they hear her say to the visitor. “They aren’t taking clients today. Maybe if you … well I never!” they hear Mrs Hudson huff and then a set of footsteps on the stairs.

John gives Sherlock a look. They go to stand and are in the process of straightening themselves out when ...

Want a sneak peak at happens in the next fic?

Check it out here and be sure to subscribe to the series so that you get updated as soon as we start posting.

'til we meet again, we wish you all the tidings of the season (whatever season it is for you) and a whole lot of love ❤ @shelleysprometheus and @7-percent .

314 notes • Posted 2021-05-14 12:36:52 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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suchalonelysunflower · 4 years

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“Unsteady”

(Ashton Irwin X fem!Reader || Angst)

Summary: Based on the song “Unsteady” by X Ambassadors. You and you husband Ashton, got into an accident. As the months pass, Ashton is starting to lose hope.

Warnings: ANGST, mentions of Drunk Driving, hospitals, coma, accidents (kinda explicit) panick attack, a lot of crying, swear words, death, blood, violence, overall sadness, bad English (not my first language, my apologies)

Word Count: 3.9k

A/N: here I am with another Ashton Angst. Hope you like it 🦋 and remember that reblogs and likes always help and feedback and comments are always welcome! I would love to hear your thoughts 💙 You can check my other works HERE.

”Hold

Hold on

Hold on to me

'Cause I'm a little unsteady

A little unsteady”

‘Her hand is too cold’ Ashton thought ‘She must be very cold’

You were lying in the hospital bed, unfazed. Ashton knew you couldn’t feel anything, at least that’s what the doctors told him. But he couldn’t help but wonder if you were cold. If you could feel your skin becoming more like ice every second but were unable to ask for a blanket.

He would give you the sun if you asked.

But you couldn’t.

Ashton hasn’t heard your voice in over three months, and damn, how he missed it. He misses you, all of you. He often wondered what he’d do if when you open your eyes. Would he cry? Kiss you? Pass out? He didn’t know. All he knew is that he’ll be the happiest man on earth once you did.

But your hands were cold against his. Your body numb in the bed. And he was by your side, unmoving.

The nice nurse came in, he liked her and knew you would too, once you meet her “It’s four already” she said, smiling kindly to Ashton. He nodded and stepped aside to let her work.

He became familiarized with the routines pretty quickly. He memorized the medicines, the sounds of the machines attached to your body, every single technicality. Ashton always hated not to know, so he spent many nights next to you studying everything he could so he’ll be up to date. It became his life mission to make sure you were treated correctly and that you were safe.

“Her hand is cold” he muttered

“Okay, I’ll make sure to bring something warm for her when I come back” the lovely nurse smiled. Ashton breathed a small ‘thank you’ as she left, taking his usual spot in the chair next to your bed, holding your hand.

“You will love her” he said to you. He read that talking to you could be helpful, since you could probably hear him “She’s very nice to us, to you. And she has that ‘loving granny’ energy you talk about. I don’t know if she’s a grandma, though. She’s probably around 52… you would know better. You always do”

His eyes landed on your face, you look beautiful as always, but you didn’t move a muscle. Ashton squeezes your hand, waiting for a reaction of any kind, but getting nothing as a result. He felt the tears coming back, they haven't left since that night, and his voice broke as he tried to hold them.

“Baby, please come back” he pleaded “I - I know you’re trying to fight when you feel like flying. I know you’re there, Y/N. Please, hold on to me. Come back to me” breaking down as he couldn’t contain the tears any longer, he whispered ”I - I miss you”

“Ashton, you can’t be serious” You said giggling.

You were coming back home after a concert. The last concert of tour and you were ready to have your husband all by yourself again. You looked at Ashton as his smile spreaded through his face, making all of his dimples pop out and your heart flutter. His hands were on the wheel, but his eyes kept drifting from you to the road.

“I mean it!” He said with a laugh “Don’t tell me you didn’t think the same thing when you saw them!”

“I did, I’m not gonna lie” you admitted “But do you think we are ready? I mean, a kid is a lot more responsibility than some plants in the garden”

It was not the first time the ‘baby conversation’ popped out. But it was always dismissed, stating that neither of you were ready for that yet. Tonight, however, one of Michael’s friends brought her baby backstage and your mommy instincts kicked in. You were pulled towards that baby like a magnet, impossible to deny how cute they were, specially in a little 5SOS hoodie customized to their size. Ashton saw from a distance how good you were with that little baby that he felt the need to have one of your own. Falling in love with the thought of you being a wonderful mother to your child.

“I know that, but think about it, love. The tour’s over, the boys and I already decided to take a little break before starting to work on a new album, we all want to dedicate some time to our families, so I’ll be around for anything you need. Not to mention that we are financially stable and completely in love” Ashton grabbed you hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it gently “Plus, think how beautiful you’ll look with a baby bump”

“Yeah, all bloated and irritable”

“Still beautiful” He fixed his eyes on you, still smiling “Look, if you’re not ready then we can wait but -“

“Let’s do it.”

“What?”

“I said, let’s do it. Let’s try for a baby”

Ashton’s eyes gleamed under the night sky as he looked at you with adoration. You were both smiling like fools. It was decided then, you were going to have a baby! You were so immerse with happiness at that moment,, maybe that’s why you didn’t see the car heading towards you.

“You should go home for a bit, mate” Michael said as he placed his hand on Ashton’s shoulder. He didn’t move.

It was visiting hours, Michael, Luke, Calum and their girls came today. They always do. Making Ashton company as he patiently waits for you next to your bed.

“I’m fine”

He really wasn’t. His hair was a mess, he had dark circles under his eyes and he can’t even remember the last time he ate a proper meal or took a real shower. But he didn’t care. All of his attention was on you, all of his hopes, his prayers, his pleads, all came back to you and the chance that you’ll open your eyes.

“You’re not fine, Ashton,” Michael pleaded again, but got no response from him “Look at me” He squeezed Ashton’s shoulder, turning Ashton around to look him in the eyes. The same hazel eyes that a few months ago were filled with love and spark, that now were empty and sad “You need to go home”

“But-“

“Go home, Ash. If not for you then do it for Y/N”

Ashton was taken aback. Michael never spoke with such authority as he did at that moment. He knew he was right but still he couldn’t leave you.

“Mike and I will stay with her” Luke said “Visitors hours don’t end until two hours from now. That’s enough time for you to grab some things from home”

“And for goodness sake, take a shower” Cal intervened.

“We’ll be here and we’ll call you if anything happens. But you can’t take care of her if you don’t take care of yourself, you were hurt too”

Ashton felt like he was being cornered by his three best friends. They were right, of course they were. But this was harder that it seemed and he didn’t know if he was ready to face it.

“I- I can’t” he mumbled looking down, feeling three pairs of eyes on him “I can’t go home without Y/N,, I don’t think I’ll be able to take it”

A pitiful look was exchanged between the three men. All of them hurting for him, for you.

“I’ll go with you, mate. You don’t have to go alone” Calum said, extending his hand to his best friend, helping him getting up.

When they reached the parking lot, Ashton tossed his keys to Calum, not saying a word. He was not ready to sit behind the wheel again. So Calum drove them through the familiar streets of LA, back to an empty house that was once filled with songs.

Ashton held his breath when he opened the door and stepped in. It was all too familiar but at the same time so strange. Everything was like the way you left it, the news paper on the kitchen table, next to the glass of wine you didn’t get to finish. The pair of shoes you decided to change at the last minute were still by the door and your perfume invaded the house as a ghost. Every inch of this house had your presence in it, but you were nowhere to be found.

Calum placed his hand on Ashton’s shoulder, something they all seem to be doing a lot lately, as he took in the empty house “Take all the time that you need” and he did.

Ashton walked through the deserted halls, stopping in front of his and your room. He placed his hand on the doorknob but didn’t have the heart to open it, knowing you won’t be there waiting for him like each night. He felt the tears coming up again and his breathing was uneven. It took all of him to step away from the door and head towards the guest room. At least he knows it won’t smell like you.

After a much needed shower, he went to the basement. The basket filled with laundry was still there, you told him you lost track of time and forgot to put it back up. He was glad you didn’t. Ashton grabbed a few shirts and jeans and put them in a bag, he also put a few of your clothes in there, thinking you’d feel more comfortable once you wake up. He couldn’t ignore the pain of smelling your perfume so close to him after so long. He didn’t want to.

He was about to head out when he walked by his music room. The door was open, so he was able to catch a glimpse of a few books you recommended him, but that he never had the chance to read. Maybe he could read them to you, he thought.

Stepping into the room he found thousands of papers scattered around the coffee table. Bunch of scratches and unfinished songs he was ready to show you.

It wasn’t a secret that you were Ashton’s muse. Every song he wrote was inspired by you in every possible way. And you were his number one fan, always encouraged him to do what he loves and to do better by himself. Always taking care, not only of him, but of everyone else. No kindness in the world could compare to yours, no love in the world could compare to yours and now…

Where were you? Why? How could this happen? Why you?

A million questions ran through Ashton’s head, making his senses go black as he ripped apart every piece of paper he could find. Not really paying attention to the damage he was causing as he threw everything in his way. Glasses, picture frames, drumsticks, the drums themselves… all for what? What did it matter? How could anything matter if you were not there?

Calum heard the thundering sounds and cries of his best friend and ran to him. But, to his eyes, it was almost impossible to describe the broken scene that played before him.

Ashton was crying out of rage, sadness, hopelessness and some relief. Letting it all out as he trashed the music room that was once a comfort for him. The tears were mixed with his sweat, grunting and panting as he destroyed every piece of himself in that room.

“Ash!” Yelled Calum as he stepped into the chaos, trying to reach his friend “Ash-Ashton!” He managed to dodge a few pieces of glass and plastic from the broken drum kit.

He reached him mid rage, grabbing his fisted hands with all the strength he could use “Ashton fucking stop! You need to stop!”

Ashton froze as he opened his eyes and found Calum staring at him in fear. Trembling and falling to this knees, he found himself unable to stand on his feet. Tears streaming down freely.

“She’s gone” he sobbed. Completely broken.

Calum let his guard down, softly saying “She’s not gone, Ash. She’s not gone” He grabbed the tall man and pulled him into a hug. Ashton didn’t put on a fight as he let himself be comforted by his friend “She’s going to be fine. You hear me? She’ll be okay”

“We were supposed to start a new chapter together. We- we were going to start a family and… it all happened so fast, Cal”

He cried even harder “Cal, I don’t remember if it was my fault”

“You were hit by a drunk driver, none of this is your fault”

“I should’ve paid more attention! It should’ve been me! I should be the one in the fucking hospital bed”

It was all too much. It all hurt too much. It’s just,, it wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this, being connected to a machine, fighting to stay alive when he was the one driving the car. Three months without opening your eyes, without hearing your laughter, or your off key singing. He would do anything just to feel your arms around him one more time, to hear your voice saying that everything was going to be okay. He needed you. He needed you desperately. How could he live without you when you were all he knew? How could he sing about love when you’re not here to hear it?

“This house doesn’t feel like a home without her” He sobbed “I- I don’t know what I’ll do, I can't lose her”

“You won’t” Said Calum, fighting his own tears when the image of you fighting for your life came to mind. But he knew he had to stay positive, for Ashton, for everyone “We won’t lose Y/N, she will wake up”

“Cal, I -“ whispered Ashton in a broken voice “I don’t think she will”

“Y/N?!”

Darkness. Everything was dark and everything hurts. Where was he? Why,, why couldn’t he move?

It took him a second to figure out that you were upside down, still inside of the car. He called your name one more time, but there was no answer. His eyes needed to adjust, he needed to find you. But then..

“A-ash?”

Your voice was weak. Barely even a whisper filled with pain.

“Y/N?!” Ashton called, his hand immediately trying to get to yours. He didn’t care about the broken pieces of glass and concrete that cut through his skin, he just needed to hold your hand “It’s okay, you’re okay”

“Ash” you cried in pain. Squeezing his hand, trying to hold onto something real “I can’t move. Everything hurts”

“Don’t move, Love. Don’t move until they come for us, okay? They’re going to help you. You’ll be okay”

Ashton tried to remain calm for you, soothing your cries by running circles in your hand. “Just hold onto me, baby. Hold my hand. We’re gonna get through this, okay? We are going to be fine”

You could only cry in response. Every ounce of pain hitting you from different parts. It was almost intolerable, but Ashton tried his best to comfort you and you got lost in the sound of his voice, starting to drift away.

“Don’t let go, Y/N. Baby. Don’t let go of my hand, okay? I need you here with me, you understand me?”

“Ashton, I’m tired”

“No, no no no, baby stay with me. Tell me, what names do you like?”

“N-names?”

“Yes, Love. For the baby”

“The baby…”

Ashton was crying, but he wouldn’t let you see it. He squeezed your hand.

“Yes, yes the baby” He could hear your breathing slowing down “You can’t go to sleep, love. Baby, hold on”

He could hear the sirens coming closer, they were going to be okay.

“W-what about Alex? Do you like that one?” You could only hum in response “Stay with me, Y/N. What about Rose? You told me you liked that name, remember?”

The lights of the ambulance shined in the pavement. They were here. Help was here.

“Rose…” you said faintly

“Yes, yes baby. We are going to have such a beautiful family” Ashton cried as he felt your hand gave in “And you’re going to be an excellent mother.”

“You’ll be an excellent father”

“Y/N?”

“I’m so tired, Ash. Everything hurts” you cried.

“Baby no, don’t leave me. Just hold onto me, keep holding onto me”

He was panicking now, feeling you fade away.

“I love you” you said.

“Y/N?! No, baby c’mon. Hold on, please. If you love me don’t let go. Don’t leave me here”

Ashton didn’t feel when the door of his car opened next to him. He didn’t feel when they pulled him out of the car and into a stretcher. He just wanted to know that you were okay.

“Y/N?!” He screamed at the paramedics, trying to find you among the crowd that has gathered around the wreck “Where’s my wife?! Y/N!”

All he could hear was “She’s losing a lot of blood!” “We need to take her now” “I don’t feel a heartbeat, we’re losing her” as he saw your figured being pulled away in another ambulance, away from him.

He yelled, screamed, cried and kicked, trying to get to you somehow. He needed to be with you. He needed to know that you were still with him. That you were okay.

He didn’t feel when they injected him with a sedative.

From that moment on, everyday was the same. Everyday hoping that it might be different.

After the wreckage of your home, Ashton came back to the hospital to find you still asleep on the bed. He thanked the boys and said goodbye, promising them that he’ll be fine.

“I went home today” he said as he sat down on his usual spot, cupping your hand in his, letting your wedding bands touch “everything is where you left it. I - I didn’t dare to put everything back, I know how mad you can get when I move your stuff” Ashton let out a sad laugh, holding your hand even tighter “I’m sorry if my hands are a bit rough, I.. well let’s say you wouldn’t want to come into my music room for quite some time. I’m sorry”

Ashton looked at you. The bruises and cuts from the accident were almost fully healed. Your hair was longer, but it wasn’t as soft as it used to be. Your eyelashes rested peacefully over your cheeks, it was almost like if you were dreaming.

“I wish you could tell me how stupid I am. Believe it or not, I miss your nagging” he sighed “I miss everything. I miss you”

The machine that was connected to your heartbeat played its usual melody, filling the gaps that were created by your silence.

“I can’t help but think that this is all my fault. Everyone tells me it’s not, that I wasn’t the one driving drunk on the streets of LA. But then I look at you and, fuck Y/N, I don’t even know if you’re in pain and it kills me. If I could trade your life for mine I would, darling, in a heartbeat.”

‘“ I should’ve paid more attention to the road. I should’ve moved out of the way or.. I should’ve done something to avoid this” silent tears rolled down his cheek, he didn’t even attempt to wipe them away “We had so much ahead of us… we were going to start a family and I.. I can’t help but think that I took that away from you, from us”

‘“ I need you here, Y/N. I need you here by my side. I can’t live without you, I don’t want to live without you, baby. You are my everything, my Y/N, my love. Without you I’m unsteady, you’re my rock, my ending and beginning, my North Star.. Y/N you’re my home. And I know it sounds selfish but I’m not ready to give you away. I love you. I love you so fucking much, Y/N. Please don’t leave me, don’t let go. Come back, baby. I need you”

He cried through every word, every confession. He cried for everything they had and all that they could have if she wakes up. He cried so hard he didn’t notice when her Heart Rate went up all of the sudden.

“Y/N? Baby don’t. No no no no don’t let go” The beeps were faster, violent, shaking up Ashton from sorrow. Having him screaming at the top of his lungs for a doctor.

It all happened so fast. A sea of white coats surrounding the room and pushing Ashton out of the way and into the hall. He tried to step in again, but a nurse cut his way.

“I’m sorry, sir. You can’t go in there” he said, sternly.

“B-but that’s my wife.. That’s my wife!”

“Sir, I will need you to stay calm and stay here while the doctors work. Okay?” He went into the room, opening the door just enough for Ashton to see two paddlers hit your chest.

Ashton punched the walls out of frustration, almost breaking his hand and making it bleed. He rested his head on the furthest wall and slowly fell to the ground, sobbing his heart out.

He stayed like that for a long time before the doctors and nurses stepped out of the room, all of them ignoring him as he stayed on the floor. It wasn’t until Y/N’s head doctor appeared that he got up.

His eyes and face were puffy red, his hand was bruised and swollen. But he couldn’t seem to find a care. Not now. Not when his Y/N was all alone. Not when there’s a chance that she’s not there anymore.

“Mr. Irwin” said the doctor in a low voice that made Ashton’s world fade to grey, swallowing the lump he had in his throat “Mrs. Irwin went into cardiac arrest. It seemed like all of this got the best of her. Her vitals were…”

But Ashton couldn’t hear her anymore. In his mind everything was pure bullshit. All of this speach saying how sorry they were and that you’re in a better place, bullshit. You were gone. You were really gone. The universe could fall apart right there and there and he wouldn’t bat an eyelash. His universe died with you.

His eyes were an empty void. He could see the mouth of the doctor still moving. But all he could think was you. You and your perfect smile, the way your eyes shined every time you talked about something that you were passionate about. The way you looked in your wedding day and how nothing could even come close to the feeling of happiness when you said your ’I do’s’ How you would dance on each and every concert, cheer him up from the side of the stage, waiting to be kissed once it was over. And now you were gone.

He would never hear you laugh or say I love you again. He would never see you walk around the house in one of his shirts, trying to call his attention. He would never feel you close in the mornings, cuddling until you eventually had to let go. You were gone. And he wasn’t ready for that. He will never be ready for a life that doesn’t have you in it.

“... So would you like to see her?” The doctor said. Calling Ashton back to the real world.

“I’m sorry, what?” His shock was palpable. Voice sounding broken and weak as he was. Lips trembling as he held his breath, afraid that he misheard her.

“She’s stable, at the moment. She asked for you. She mentioned something about a rose....”

You were okay? You were awake?!

Ashton burst into the room without a second thought. Tears falling as he saw you looking at him from the hospital bed, smiling weakly. He stood there for a second, whispering as he thought it might be a dream.

“Y/N?”

“Ashton....”

”If you love me, don't let go

If you love me, don't let go”

262 notes · View notes

disaster-bay-leaf · 3 years

Note

Ok so these were the cutest~ (ㆁωㆁ)

4, 6, 7, 9, 12, 19, 22, 23, 28, 33, 34, 46, 47, 52, 59, 60, 63, 66, 83, 87, 88, 93, 99

I kno I listed like....all of them lmao but feel free to answer whichever you want and ofc you can ask me in return Baybe ( ◜‿◝ )♡

uHUHUHUHU much content for me to answer, im happy bebe 💜💜💜✨

4 - how do you take your coffee/tea?

hm coffee either Very Black No Sugar (for the sleep deprived me) or iced latte three sugars and theres no in between

and as for tea its All Black Teas That Exist, cinnamon-flavoured especially (but basically all teas that come to mind when u think “autumn”), and rooibos!!! okay basically the only oke i dont like is any type of green tea (which is sad because they look cool but my tastebuds said ✨no✨)

6 - do you keep plants?

honestly id l o v e too because i love plants but,,, im kinda horrible at taking care of them though still way better than the majority of my family (research helps) so the only plant i own is kinda a small-palm-tree-looking thing in a bigass glass jar that i saved from my mother’s plant-destructing hands and its mostly doing well (the ends of its leaves are starting to be yellow tho and im worried:((( )

7 - do you name your plants?

yes!!! though the current one was named by my sister and its called “pickett” after fantastic beasts shsjjsj

9 - do you like singing/humming to yourself?

oh god oh dude you have n o idea

i have absolutely n o singing voice but its something i do constantly to give my brain the right amount of stimuli so basically i listen to music 24/7 and hum to myself 99% of that time

12 - whats your favourite planet?

oh i actually didnt think about this for so long but either pluto (hes a planet screw nasa) or saturn (RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) or venus (girls,,,and libra,,,)

19 - do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw in it?

okay im gonna be completely honest with yall and say that my every single try at keeping a journal failed spectacularly and i lost motivation after like a few months so my only journals rn are my fancy fake-leather-bound calendar to note tests and assessments into, a kinda roughed up notebook that i uses for noting down poems or scribbling or passing notes in class, and a kinda fancy bullet journal notebook that i used as a book of shadows for a while but since my fountain pen died i didnt touch it

22 - are you a morning person?

n o

i am so not a morning person but i wish i could be because honestly dawns are beautiful

but as it is rn im either sleep deprived all the time and loathe every second of being in an awake state or (if i have a few days of schoolbreak) my biological clock moves forward a few hours and i sleep 2am-10am

23 - whats your favourite thing to do on lazy days with zero obligations?

except for the fact that i dont remember the last time it happened, i would probably spend it drawing outside, watching anime with my sister and riding a bike around the forest

28 - sunrise or sunset?

i love sunrises because its so peaceful and everyone is asleep but also i subconsciously immediately correlate them with waiting for a train to take me to school (because thats basically the only time i see them) so its a bittersweet love especially with my fucked up biological clock

but sunsets are really really pretty too and i see them more often so i cant choose

33 - whats your fave pastry?

and isnt that a millior-dollar question dhsjjsjsj

either cinnamon rolls (i absolutely adore them) or that one specific type of cupcake-shaped-thing made out of shortcrust/bread/whatever its called and filled with vanilla pudding

34 - tell us about a stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

awwww this is cute

okay so basically my two favourite stuffed animals (i still have them, they sit in my wardrobe) were two teddy bears (like maybe 20cm high each of them) and one was pure brown and the other was silver-brown and they had stereotypical polish male names “Waldek” (read. Valdek) and Stefan (i think tho im not sure if i remember correctly, my memory is a feeble thing sometimes

46 - tell us the worst pun you can think of

what dog would never bite you? a hot dog *badumtss*

47 - what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

huh a year ago id say pineapple pizza but i guess i dont hate pineapples that much anymore (tho putting them on pizza is still an abomination) but i think that if id ever want to get rid of anything it would be parsley, i hate that freakin herb (does it count as food tho)

52 - what are your favourite memes of the year so far?

the ever given for sure shsjshjsjsjsjjsj

but bullying tramp stamps is gold and pure tumblr energy too

as for fandom memes: im in love with all keeping-up-with-the-todorokis variations and the fact that the entire bsd fandom looked at fukuchi and said “biTCH” and thats one of the only things we’re unanimous about

59 - whats your favourite myth?

i always liked the kora/persephone myth (though demeter is an overbearing parent to the nth power), loki and thor crossdressing at a party to get mjolnir back, atalanta because shes a queen and id politely ask her to kick my ass, and cassandra because she deserved better, and theres a l o t more because alas i was a mythology nerd but this post is long enough for me not to make this section 20 times longer sjjsjsjsjsjks

but there are a lot of slavic myths that are very cool too, though we dont know that much about them as about the greeks for example

60 - do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

o o o o h yeah i do like poetry because to create such a beautifully sounding thing with only words someone has to be a genius

some of my favs are: some works of nakahara chuuya (thank u bsd for introducing me to this man’s beautiful imagery in his works i swear to god the descriptions do it for me) (also his poem about having hangovers is a mood like i feel you buddy), the raven by ea poe (i know everyone likes it but hOLY DAMN THE INTER/INTRAVERSE RHYMES ARE LIKE,,, BREATHTAKING) (and aso im a slut for gothic horror), and many more but also That One Poem From Welcome To Nightvale about reaching the island in the west,,, only perfect vibes from it

63 - are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organised or kinda leave them be?

okay heres the thing. for anyone else both my playlist library and my bookshelf would be considered pure chaos of a mad man b u t they actually have a highly focused system which means that i sort them based on their vibes, lovability and (in case of books) their age and whether or not theyre a part of a series so i would say my bookshelf is rather organised (when a quarter of it isnt occupying my desk that is) and my music is more organised than not but sometimes it gets out of control and i have to sort it entirely again

66 - what would your ideal flower crown look like?

either entirely constructed of simple white daisies, entirely constructed of only white roses, or something that probably would win a “how many different coloured flowers can one fit in a flower crown” competition

or something purple (maybe not belladonna)

83 - whats some of your favourite album art?

god i dont know if it counts but hozier’s wasteland baby is probably one of my absolute favourites and no one shall beat that

“thrifted youth” (dalynn) and “standard deviation” (danny schmidt) have very aesthetic covers too

also the iconic p!atd too weird to live, too rare to die! album cover,,, its just iconic what can i say

and last but not least matt meason’s pink-and-black album covers (though bank on the funeral is really pretty too but like,,, “who killed matt meason” d o e s it for me and so does the 2017 tribulation single)

87 - what are some movies that you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

this is such a hard question because im not a really cinematography-oriented gal but i suppose that (at the risk of not going deep enough into the cinema world):

- the princess bride

- inception

- night at the museum

- SPIRITED AWAY

- forrest gump

- truman show

- E.T. (i cried okay)

- the lord of the rings (because damn me if this isnt one impressive adaptation)

- parasite

and one more personal recommendation: “ready or not” with samara weaving because goddamn i dont usually watch this genre but holy s h i t is it good

93 - whats the hairstyle you wear the most?

honestly just plain hair down (because having curly hair is a menace), split in the middle when i have longer hair and split on one side when its short

also low ponytails or half-up-half-down when im exercising, or double french braids when my hair doesnt cooperate enough to look presentable in any other form

99 - list some songs that resonate with your soul whenever you hear them

this is difficult because my music taste is a goddamn rollercoaster on a good day, but heres some:

- me and the sky from “come from away” musical (this is sort of a test song for my mental stability, if i cry i aint stable)

- dancing after death by matt meason (okay most songs by matt meason except for like,,, hallucinogenics maybe)

- tears and rain by james blunt

- i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

- almost home by mxmtoon

- anything by hozier really but shrike especially

- payphone, the cover by alex g (i cried to this song so many times)

- burning pile by mother mother (can i roast all my problems please)

- long way from home and cleopatra by the lumineers

- autoclave by the mountain goats

oooh that was c o o o o o o o l as fuck thank you sm so much bebe (and sorry for the long post @everyone else)

#smadhuman being pure af #bay answers #long post #very long post #ask #asks

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justdyingslowly · 4 years

Text

1. Name justdyingslowly obviously come on

2. Nationality Australian

3. Age 22

4. Birthday nnnah dont feel like it

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) Libra/Scorpio cusp

6. Gender wamon

7. Sexuality very very hetero

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) androgenous

9. What do you/did you study? Psychology (focus on sexology) and art.

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I am disabled you think I can work ha sexologist would be awesome. When I was a kid I wanted to be a fireman but Australias always burning

11. Your birth order head first

12. How many siblings do you have? 1

13. Do you have good relations with your family? yeah dads finally out of his abusive relationship, nearing age 70 and his emotions and his sexuality are finally opening up for the first time and that makes me SO happy.

14. How many friends do you have? what kind of fucked up question is this.

15. Your relationship status relationshipped. Fiance? got the marriage papers in a drawer somewhere with the car rego but can’t be fucked filling them?

16. What do you look for in a SO? empathetic, mature, calm. Always open to discussion. Prefers to be blunt rather than secretive. Emotional age over 14 (incredibly fucking rare apparently). Puts an importance on context and understanding other views above all else.

17. Do you have a crush? Hellll yeah Crush on my partner and got a crush on a mutual friend of ours who don’t even know hes cute af hehe one day partners gonna accidentally spill the beans and embarrass me coz hes shit with secrets RIP me.

18. When did you have your first kiss? You think I can remember this bullshit? Its not that big a deal

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? One night stand sex almost exclusively sucks. Just. SUCKS. Because neither of you know what the other likes and it ends up being an awkward mix of trying to please yourself while trying to also be considerate.

20. What are your deal breakers? Plugging your ears to anything that feels gross, uncomfortable or disagrees with you. How can you grow as a person without introspection? How can you mold what you think and believe without taking in other arguments and comparing them to your beliefs to see how they stack up? Its pathetic.

21. How was your day? cute mutual friend had a fall this morning and were both worried about him. His back is bad and he’s getting a little older, he can’t be getting dizzy and having falls like that. other than that im anxious about seeing my gastro. He’s lovely but... specialists are specialists. Good at knowing what they know but not always great at listening.

22. Favourite food & drink you think im allowed to eat or drink? water and... foods a touchy subject.

23. What position do you sleep in? Usually on my side with a body pillow to grip so I don’t end up choking my partner in his sleep.

24. What was your last dream about? uuhhh...going to italy and being unable to get into this tiny basket boat properly.

25. Your fears does PTSD to medical shit count haha

26. Your dreams ... going to italy and being unable to get into a tiny basket boat thingy?

27. Your goals - get some sort of diagnosis eventually. Its been 3 years of trying and im tired. - get back to studying art part time for my bachelors. - pass JLPT N3. - go back to university for psychology. - do the dishes when I get home.

28. Any pets? two budgies. we also take care of any orphaned or injured birds.

29. What are your hobbies? feeling nauseous drawing writing a little bit im making a little gameboy game in C atm too

30. Any cool places in your area? i live next to a national park with waterfalls and koalas and emus and stuff

31. What was your last awkward situation? mutual friend made a comment on his chest i playfully smacked it (related to the comment) it was surprisingly hard “O-oh wow, thats... I didnt expect that” my partner laughed at me. it was awful.

32. What is your last regret? getting embarrassed at friends pecs stop making me think about it 33. Language/s you can speak english. N4 Japanese.

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) of course not what the fuck

35. Have any quirks? Quirkless. I do wiggle when im happy though apparently.

36. Your pet peeves open doors.

37. Ideal vacation spend a months chilling in an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

38. Any scars? internal? yes

39. What does your last text message say? peepee poopoo ustinky

40. Last 5 things from your search history how do i find this

41. What’s your [device] background? Sam Porter Bridges walkin around Sam Porter Bridges cuddling BB-28 Louise while he sleeps my chicken

42. What do you daydream about? all might

43. Describe your dream home an old japanese house in autumn hokkaido oooooof that sounds nice

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion its a comforting thought having a parent-figure who cares about you and looks after all the big things you can’t manage yourself, but institutionalizing it runs a severe risk of becoming harmful cults. And it often does.

45. Your personality type me

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done i saw the lost bunny that was on all the posters in the neighbourhood looked thin and patchy so i grabbed him to take him home. im allergic. sent me to hospital and I almost died.

47. Are you happy with your current life? feeling sick sucks and partners having a depressive episode but things are pretty good

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life living

49. What does your wardrobe consist of? blacks, reds, whites and pinks

50. Favourite colour to wear? at the moment pink. Red is always comforting though.

51. How would you describe your style? mix between lazy alternative punk, teenager with band shirts and harajuku peach kawaii uwu

52. Are you happy with your current looks? kinda wish i was a bit shorter but what can you do

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? bit shorter

54. Any tattoos or piercings? lol no PTSD

55. Do you get complimented often? by who? partner constantly, family haha are you kidding im australian so a friend’s version of showing affection is calling you a cunt and slapping your ass in public

56. Favourite aesthetic? all might

57. A popular trend that you dislike blocking because you disagree or find them distasteful. Ignoring all context to opposing thoughts and arguments. taking a personal feeling of disgust to mean something is evil. Blocking your ears to anything that isn’t a circlejerk of what you already think - and trying to isolate anyone who even just listens to something other then the noise of your sloppy dicks to have a thought of their own.

58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with? The Machine by Low Roar

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like. why wouldnt i admit i like a song

60. Favourite genre? probably enka haha

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? probably enka haha oh and tatsuro yamashita

62. Hated popular songs/artists? why the hell would I hate something like a song? I hate aspects of the music industry as a whole I guess?

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 which playlist they aren’t all together in one place

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? piano, saxophone... uh... partners good at making music and playing shakuhachi

65. Do you like karaoke? no.

66. Own any albums? yes? many?

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? no. but triple J, ABC Jazz and Classical. sometimes they even play final fantasy and JRPG music on classical which is pretty neat. -

68. Favourite movie/series? can i make this about games because then the answer is Metal Gear Solid

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc ...shounen?

70. Your fictional crush/es if they’re over 40yrs old, male and happy and bubbily or grumpy and sad then there’s a big ol fat chance I wanna bone. Solid Snake from MGS4, All Might and pretty much anyone drawn by Tarou Madoromi.

71. Which fictional character is you? uh

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so what does this even mean what language is this

73. Favourite greek god? idk hades seems chill

74. A legend from where you live that you like the story of Tjilbruke is funny and good. all Kaurna stories are good.

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist? im in a big egon schiele mood atm.

76. Can you share your other social media? no i am incapable

77. Favourite youtubers? many

78. Favourite platform? not too high up. actually i like being a little lower than ground level in corners.

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite? look i just want to say that MGS4 is the best one in the series and Death Stranding is phenomenally engaging.

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) these are all so goddamn definitive how can I pick? Oh wait the answer is One Piece

82. Do you play board/card games? I play DnD atm and know 15 yr old rules to Yugioh

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? that shit dosn’t happen here

84. Favourite holiday golden week coz its a week also easter because thats when all the glucose based sweets come back

85. Are you into dramas? what kind

86. Would you use death note, if you had one? no. thats called being a murderer.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? chill people out a bit. when people feel unsafe they get really depenfive and territorial and block their ears to everything, making in-and-out groups for themsevles that end up putting them in more harm.

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? im disabled with a disabled partner. we arent funny sure we can survive normal everyday life when society is angled so sharply against us.

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? id like to be a mimi spirit

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? spooky time

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? toshinori yagi

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? anyone healthy

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo that cursed one with the intense eyes and the hand

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true im me im not me im pee

95. Cold or hot? cold.

96. Be a hero or be a villain? both are distasteful ideas in reality

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? i can’t do either partner speak sin bad puns and its hell, these both sound about equal

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting. controlling time is eithe rmanipulative or lonely. shapeshifing is every other superpower at once.

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death? both are deeply upsetting ideas

100. ….. or …..? jiji or ossan? generally Jiji, but ossans can be lovely too.

#personal #stupid

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frissmalna · 5 years

Text

☁️☁️☁️

1.if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

2.have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

3.three songs that you connect with right now.

4.would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?

5.have you taken someones virginity?

6.how many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?

7.if you could, would you take back your last kiss?

8.who would you like to see in concert?

9.what was the last concert you saw?

10.would you ever want to swim with sharks?

11.do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?

12.what was the last thing that made you laugh?

13.a song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?

14.have any pets?

15.do you want to have kids? How many?

16.do you have piercings? How many?

17.do you miss anyone from your past?

18.what are you craving right now?

19.have you ever broken someone’s heart?

20.have you ever been cheated on?

21.have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

22.do you believe in true love?

23.favourite weather?

24.do you like the snow?

25.do you wanna get married?

26.is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

27.what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

28.go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

29.what’s your favorite pasta dish?

30.what color do you really want to dye your hair?

31.what’s your favorite eye color?

32.talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

33.are you a morning person?

34. what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

35.what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

36.what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

37.tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

38.do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

39.who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

40.what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

41.do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

42.think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

43.what are your favorite memes of the year so far

44.do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

45.what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

46.what are some of your worst habits?

47.describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

48.tell us about your pets!

49.is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

50.are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

51.what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

52.describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

53.what’s some of your favorite album art?

54.are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

55.do you like concept albums? which ones?

56.what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

57.list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

58.if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

59.what do you do when you’re sad?

60.what are some things you do when you can’t sleep?

61.what was the best (non-romantic) night you’ve had?

62.who is the last person you told a secret to?

63.what’s the best piece of advice you ever received?

64.what’s your favorite food?

65.what’s your secret dream?

66.three songs you were recently obsessed with.

67.three songs that remind you of the person who sends this one

68. three favourite old songs

69.three last songs you listened to

70.worst possible time to get horny:

71.have you ever had a friends with benefits?

72.do you believe in soulmates?

73.Is there anyone you would die for?

74.whowas the last person you cried in front of?

75.do you give out second chances too easily?

76.is it easier to forgive or forget?

77.is this year the best year of your life?

78.do you have trust issues?

79.who/what was your last dream about?

80.would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

#ask meme #questions #ask me

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icaruspendragon · 3 years

Text

— Get to know me!

The last time I filled this out was in July of 2017 and I just wanted to see how my answers changed, the new answers are in parentheses.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? A boy named Igor (My husband John Paul) 2. Are you outgoing or shy? Shy (Shy) 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My mom today! (JP when he gets home from work lolol) 4. Are you easy to get along with? I would say yes, I don’t really fight with anyone. (same) 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? He already has haha. (same answer, different person) 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Kind people. (same, also boys with long hair) 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Yes (I sure hope so) 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Igor (Zuko lmao) 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Nope (same) 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Patrick (JP) 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “You can be anything you want. I’ll support you.” ( “I was just training.” ) 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? The most recent Bastille album lol. ( Waves by Bastille, Rosie by John Mayer, Swimming In The Moonlight by Bad Suns, Thank Me Later by Anna of the North, and Jackie and Wilson by Hozier) 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? YES ( same) 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yes (kinda) 15. What good thing happened this summer? Going to Gay Pride in Nashville (I got married) 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? HELL YEAH (ye) 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Yes (same) 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? No (same) 19. Do you like bubble baths? Yes (same) 20. Do you like your neighbors? I don’t really talk to my neighbors (no i do not like them) 21. What are you bad habits? I doubt myself a lot. (I used to do a shit ton of cocaine and still want to do a lot of cocaine haha) 22. Where would you like to travel? YES (same) 23. Do you have trust issues? YES (same) 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Cuddling with my cats after I wake up. (going to bed lol) 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? I love myself totally. (All I want in this world is a fat ass) 26. What do you do when you wake up? Check my phone. (crawl over my still slumbering husband to quietly get ready for work) 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Neither. I am fine just the way that I am. (yeah same) 28. Who are you most comfortable around? Mackenzie. (JP) 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Yes. (same) 30. Do you ever want to get married? I think so. (I am married) 31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes. (same) 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? None. (same) 33. Spell your name with your chin. bdfdfmkljde (ber5klkier) 34. Do you play sports? What sports? No, I’m in band. (no, but I was in band for 11 years) 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV (same) 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes. (same) 37. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing. That’s what makes them awkward. (lol, yeah) 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Tall, dark, English major. (same) 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Amazon lmao. (i’m a slut for etsy and i greatly enjoy candy stores) 40. What do you want to do after high school? I’m already done with high school thank God. ( i dunno) 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? It depends. (No) 42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean? Nothing. (probably thinking about zutara tbh) 43. Do you smile at strangers? Yes, I’m from the South. I think it’s ingrained in my DNA to. (yeah) 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Space boi (same) 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? That morning wee (work and wee) 46. What are you paranoid about? That none of friends like me and that they’re all just pretending. (same) 47. Have you ever been high? Yes. (same) 48. Have you ever been drunk? Yes. (same) 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Oh honey. (nope) 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Black. (yellow) 51. Ever wished you were someone else? Nope. (ye) 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? Nothing.(i. want. a. fat. ass.) 53. Favourite makeup brand? Probably Tarte. (NYX) 54. Favourite store? Ulta (I don’t really have one) 55. Favourite blog? I don’t have one. (I have so many now, omg @babytreehugger @hugs4zuko @pineapple-frenzy @bluelady-atla @aprilmayship and @firelxdykatara are a few of them!) 56. Favourite colour? Light green. (same) 57. Favourite food? Pasta (same) 58. Last thing you ate? Pasta lmao. (does espresso count? if not, then pizza for dinner last night) 59. First thing you ate this morning? I haven’t yet. (espresso, lol, i have yet to have food today) 60. Ever won a competition? For what? Nope. (do band competitions count? if so, yes) 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? Nope. (same) 62. Been arrested? For what? Nope. (same) 63. Ever been in love? Yes. (yeah boiiii) 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? I was in seventh grade. It wasn’t great. (that’s pretty much it) 65. Are you hungry right now? No. (also no) 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? No. (no, but more gently this time) 67. Facebook or Twitter? Facebook. (neither tbh) 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr (same) 69. Are you watching tv right now? No. (same) 70. Names of your bestfriends? Carleigh, Karlee, Maria, Mackenzie, Emily, Josh, and Allen!! (same, but now i have JP, another Maria, Scott, Corbin, and pretty much all of my sbux coworkers) 71. Craving something? What? Not really haha. (same) 72. What colour are your towels? Different colors. (same) 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? Three. (five lmao) 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Yes. (yes) 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I only have two with me at my apartment, but more at home. (five) 75. Favourite animal? Dragon. (same) 76. What colour is your underwear? Pink. (blue) 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Vanilla (depends on what is being offered) 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Vanilla (birthday cake) 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Gray (red plaid) 80. What colour pants? Blue nike shorts. (red plaid. yes it’s 1:59 pm. yes i’m wearing pajamas) 81. Favourite tv show? Avatar: the Last Airbender. (same) 82. Favourite movie? The Way He Looks (same) 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Mean Girls (ye) 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? 21 Jump Street (ye) 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? I don’t have one. (ye) 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? I don’t have one. (ye) 87. First person you talked to today? Sage (John Paul) 88. Last person you talked to today? Jaimy (John Paul) 89. Name a person you hate? I don’t hate anyone. (da president) 90. Name a person you love? Mackenzie. He’s kind of my hero. (Same, but also my husband I reckon) 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? No one really haha. (same) 92. In a fight with someone? No. (currently, no. in the past? yes. this question is weird) 93. How many sweatpants do you have? One. (still just one) 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? Four or five. (so many) 95. Last movie you watched? Logan (I have no idea about the last movie i watched and also no idea what movie “Logan” is) 96. Favourite actress? I don’t think that I have one. (same) 97. Favourite actor? Avan Jogia. (same i reckon) 98. Do you tan a lot? No. (same) 99. Have any pets? Yes, three cats! (same three cats and now a dog) 100. How are you feeling? Tired. But that’s nothing new. (lmao yeah same) 101. Do you type fast? Yes. (ye) 102. Do you regret anything from your past? Oh honey (ahaha :’) ) 103. Can you spell well? Yes. (i am okay) 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? OH BUDDY (ye) 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes. (same) 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Yes. (same) 107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes. (same, and never again) 108. What should you be doing? Sleeping. (writing or cleaning) 109. Is something irritating you right now? No. (no) 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yes. (ye) 111. Do you have trust issues? Oh yeah. (ye) 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? My mom. (JP) 113. What was your childhood nickname? Gertie. (that one and also ‘berkel’) 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yes. (ye) 115. Do you play the Wii? No. (still no) 116. Are you listening to music right now? Yes, the Danish String Quartet. (no) 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? It’s okay. (it is still just an okay soup) 118. Do you like Chinese food? Hell yeah. (HELL YEAH) 119. Favourite book? Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. (same) 120. Are you afraid of the dark? I used to be, but not anymore. (yes) 121. Are you mean? No, being mean gets you nowhere in life. (no) 122. Is cheating ever okay? No. (also no) 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? Hell nope. (still nope) 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? No. (sorta kinda) 125. Do you believe in true love? Yes. (yeah) 126. Are you currently bored? A little. (no) 127. What makes you happy? A good book, a cup of coffee, and a cold rainy day. (same) 128. Would you change your name? I used to want to change it to something “normal” but not anymore. (I need to because it’s been six months since i got married and i have yet to legally change my last name) 129. What your zodiac sign? Gemini. I was supposed to be a cancer though, my mom just couldn’t chill lol. (same) 130. Do you like subway? It’s okay. (same) 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?Probably just hope that it goes away. I don’t like change. (still same, except I’d probably tell JP about it) 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? I answered this earlier, and it’s still Patrick. (Still JP) 133. Favourite lyrics right now? The song Blackbird by the Beatles in its entirety. (WAP, in its entirety) 134. Can you count to one million? Yes. ( probably? yes. will i? no.) 135. Dumbest lie you ever told? There is no telling. (that one time i faked my death when I was like, 14.) 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed. (cracked open) 137. How tall are you? 5′4. (still 5′4) 138. Curly or Straight hair? I have curly hair. (same) 139. Brunette or Blonde? I have blonde hair. (same) 140. Summer or Winter? Winter. (same) 141. Night or Day? Night. (same) 142. Favourite month? December. (same) 143. Are you a vegetarian? No, but I have been in the past. (no) 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk. (sameO 145. Tea or Coffee? COFFEE (BOTH) 146. Was today a good day? Yes. (it was alright I reckon) 147. Mars or Snickers? Neither. (same) 148. What’s your favourite quote? “fire cannot kill a dragon.” (anything uncle iron says ever) 149. Do you believe in ghosts? Hell yeah. (ye) 150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “He was so snug in there that he was able to pretend that he was safe at home, having survived the war, and that he was telling his parents and sister a true war story–whereas the true war story was still going on.” From Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut. ( “‘They plant when they’re hot. It doesn’t mean they’re angry or hungry.’ I hesitated, watching her. ‘You’ve never seen one before, have you?’” From “Parable of the Sower” by Octavia E. Butler)

#that was long #but fun #fill it out if you want to

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lovemesomesurveys · 4 years

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Ready to answer 151 Questions? 1. When was the last time you swam in a pool? Like 6/7 years ago. 2. Do you like to party? My idea of a party is a small get together with friends just chillin’ with food and music. Maybe play some boardgames. Just super laid back. Crazy party scenes with a shitload of people I don’t even know is not my thing at all. That all being said, I haven’t been to a party in like 3 years. 3. If your ex suddenly kissed you right now, what would you do? I can’t even imagine a scenario where that would happen now. We haven’t talked or seen each other in almost 5 years. For that to happen, that would mean we were talking and hanging out again and yeah, don’t see that happening. Plus, SO much has changed for the both of us. Our ship sailed a longggg time ago. 4. Are you a virgin? Yes. 5. What are your parents views on your relationships? Ty and I never dated, but my parents really liked him. My mom definitely thought something was going on and she was rooting for us, ha.

6. If you ran into your current boyfriend/crush in 10 years, would you marry them? I don’t have a boyfriend or a crush right now. But also, I wouldn’t just marry someone I bumped into 10 years later. Like, a LOT would have changed in that amount of time. Just because I dated or was interested in someone doesn’t mean things would be the same seeing each other that many years later. Would the feelings come back? Would we still vibe? What are we doing in our life at that time? Are we both single? 7. Is your best friend dating anyone? My mom has been with my dad for over 30 years. 8. Describe the shirt you’re wearing? It’s a tie-shirt with pastel colors. 9. Do people who wear Hollister and Abrerbrombie every day bother you? I really don’t care. 10. Could you go out in public without wearing make-up? I’ve been doing that for the past few years. To think that there was a time I would have never done that... 11. What is one feature that you don’t like? On me? I mean, everything, but my smile/teeth for one. 12. Would people describe you as happy? No. 13. Are you single? Yep. 14. Does it bother you that pretty much every survey you take asks if you’re single? Yes or questions about relationships. 15. Do you have Tumblr? Duhhh.

16. What about Xanga? Aww, RIP Xanga. 17. Have you ever babysat before? Yeah, my younger brother and a couple of my cousins when they were kids. 18. Is there a teacher who you absolutely hate? I had two awful math professors in community college. Like, they were horrible. 19. Ever shopped at Sephora? Yeah. 20. If your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away, what would you do? 21. Do you have any university plans? I graduated with my BA five years ago. I’m not going any further. 22. If your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do? I mean, it would definitely come as a huge shock if my mom came out now. Of course it wouldn’t change anything between us, but things would be different for awhile. Like, it would take time to get used to a new normal, one where she’s not with my dad who she’s been with for over 30 years and one where she’s with a woman. 23. What are your views on sex? Be safe. If you’re an adult and it’s consensual then I don’t see an issue. 24. Do sexual questions bother you? No. I just don’t have much to say on the matter. 25. Would you rather have sex with your boyfriend or break up? Wth. 26. Have you ever dreamed about your wedding? Nope. 27. Does it bother you when people TYpe 1yk dis’? Omg. I’m so glad I don’t see that anymore. That seemed to die when Myspace did. 28. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook? There’s still photos of Joseph and I. *shrug* 29. Would you ever date a friends Ex? No. 30. What’s the last book you read? The Girl and the Hunt by AJ Rivers. 31. Ready for 10 simple questions? Sure. 32. What is your last name? Stephanie. 33. What grade are you in? I graduated college 5 years ago, I’m done. 34. What school do you go to? 35. Summer, Fall, Winter or Spring? Fall and winter. 36. Favorite Color? Pastels, rose gold, yellow, coral, mint green. 37. Are your parents together? Yes. 38. Any siblings? I have two brothers. 39. Favorite subject? Psychology.

40. Least favorite subject? Math. 41. Favorite song? I could never just choose one. 42. Okay. Simple questions are over. Happy? I don’t care. 43. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 150ish. 44. Ever been requested by some old guy from another country? They weren’t old, but yeah I’ve had several requests from men from other countries. 45. Have you ever googled yourself? Yeah. 46. Have a Formspring? I used to. I suppose it still exists out there since I never deleted it. I haven’t been on there in several years, though. 47. You’re offered free tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. What do you do? Probably decline the offer. I actually do like both his current and previous album, but I don’t know if I’d want to go to his concert. *shrug* I also don’t know anyone who would go with me and I wouldn’t go alone. 48. Would you rather spend the day at an amusement park or a water park? Amusement park. I don’t do water slides and whatnot. 49. Been to Disney world? Nope, but I’d love to go. I’ve been to Disneyland several times, though. 50. If someone posts their status “9 Inches :(” do you know what they mean? Sounds like one of those things where people post a random status from a list of things that will likely get people’s attention and whoever comments on it is privately sent said list of thing and they then choose something to post as their status and so on. That was a popular game thing on Facebook years ago. 51. Ever had a boyfriend? Yes.

52. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? I’ve had crushes on guys who never knew, but the really serious ones (there were 5) all knew. 53. Have you done something in the last week that you regret? Yes. 54. Ever drank alcohol? Yeah. I drank in my early 20s until I was 24. 55. Know anyone who’s currently doing drugs? Yeah. 56. Ever watched The Hills? Yeah, the OG one and the reboot that came out last year. 57. What about Jersey Shore? No, I never got into that one. 58. Ever called someone a slut? I’ve said that jokingly to friends. 59. What do you think of short shorts? I don’t wear them. Or any length of shorts. 60. Does it bother you if people swear around you? No. I think it’s funny because my dad is still weird about cussing in front of me and so is our family friend. She always apologizes to me if she does it. 61. Have you ever gotten an A in a subject? I mostly got A’s and B’s throughout school with some C’s because of stupid math. 62. What about a B? ^^^ 63. And a C? ^^^ 64. How about a D? No. 65. Ever skived? What’s that? 66. Would you consider yourself popular and outcast or somewhere in the middle? I’d say I was the outcast. I mean, I had some friends, but I really just didn’t stand out or fit in. 67. Are most of your friends older or younger than you? My friends were my age or a year younger. Ty was the only one who was older than me (just by a year). 68. Ever been stabbed in the back by a close friend? Yes. 69. Do you think it’s immature when people laugh at the number 69? I have my immature moments, too. That one doesn’t do it for me, though. 70. Ever watched porn? I’ve seen it, but it wasn’t for my viewing pleasure or anything. I just personally don’t get the appeal. 71. How many laws do you think you’ve broken in the past month? I don’t think I’ve broken any. I don’t do anything or go anywhere, ha. 72. Do you wake up with an alarm clock? Yeah. I’d sleep later than 3PM if I didn’t and I don’t know, for some reason I don’t want to. Not like I have anything better to do, but *shrug* 73. Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Makes no difference to me. 74. If your school had a Glee Club would you join? No. I can’t sing. I’m surprised I did choir for a few years in elementary school. 75. Ever performed in a talent show? My 2nd grade class did. We did “This Little Light of Mine” with a few very simple hand movements that went along with it. 76. Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. For the most part it’s only been at funerals and doctor appointments, but there have been a few other times in public where I felt the tears coming and tried to fight them back, but they started coming out anyway. I’m definitely someone who doesn’t like to cry in front of other people, so when it happens then you know it’s bad. 77. Do you have a favorite between your Mom and your Dad? I love both of my parents, but my mom and I have a closer relationship. She’s my best friend. I truly don’t know what I’d do without her. 78. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? Nooo. I have zero talent. 79. How many celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 80. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 81. Name 5 male celebrities who you think are attractive. Alexander Skarsgard, Henry Cavill, Chris Evans, Matt Bomer, and Chris Pratt. 82. Name 5 female celebrities who you think are attractive. Margot Robbie, Jennifer Lopez, Ariana Grande, Hailey Baldwin, and Natalie Portman. 83. Ever been compared to a celebrity? Ha, no. 84. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? If someone uploads a photo of me that I don’t approve of it gets deleted asap. 85. Do you think spending £20 on Lip Gloss is a waste of money? That’s too much to me. 86. Are you opinionated? I do have my opinions I feel strongly about, but I also consider myself to be openminded. I’m open to hearing different sides of things. I want to. And it’s certainly possible for my opinion to change. 87. Do you have a favorite store? BoxLunch, Hot Topic, Kohl’s, Target, and Bath & Body Works. 88. Would you ever wear Flare Jeans? No. 89. Do you own jeans that aren’t skinny? Nope. 90. Have you ever worn the same outfit twice in one week? Yeah. *gasp* Call the fashion police! 91. What’s the longest period of time you’ve been away from school? Well, I graduated college 5 years ago if that counts. But if you mean like while I was still going to school, then a few months. I had to miss school 3 times for a few months because I had to have surgery. One of the times was when I was supposed to start UC, but ended up having to start the following semester instead. 92. Do you google abbreviations you don’t understand? Yeah. 93. Does it bother you when people have cats as their profile picture? I don’t care? 94. Own a pair of converse? Yes. 95. Is there a teacher at your school who has obvious favorites? 96. If yes, are you one of them? 97. Do you text in class? I never did that. I was a goody-goody lol. 98. What brand of jeans do you wear the most? I haven’t worn jeans at all in like 3 years, ha, but anyway most of my jeans are the Arizona brand from JCP. They’re the perfect fit for me and they’re reasonably priced. 99. At what point do you think sizes are “Plus Sized?” According to Google, it starts at size 16. 100. Do you want to lose weight? Nooo. I’m too underweight as it is. I need to gain weight. 101. Ever seen a therapist? No, but I should. 102. Ever watched porn? Yeah, I’ve seen some of it. I didn’t watch out of enjoyment, though. I don’t get the appeal, personally. 103. Ever purposely ignored a text? Yes. 104. A facebook message? Yes. 105. A poke? I always ignored those. That was a dumb feature Facebook had. 106. A friend request? Yeah. I don’t accept a request from anyone I don’t know. 107. Would you say you read into things too much? Yepppp. 108. Is your best friend more likely to be the one suggesting something stupid or refusing to do something stupid? Refusing. 109. Do you have a “fun friend?” (A friend who you have tons of fun with but you never really have deep conversations?) No. 110. Ever been called a bully? No. 111. Ever purposely hurt yourself? Yes. 112. Ever gone to church? Yes. I used to go sometimes with both sets of grandparents when I was a kid. They were of different religions, so that began my complicated and non-existent relationship with religion. That changed a few years ago, though, and now I’m a Christian. For over a year I’ve only been listening to the audio version a local church uploaded to their website every Sunday until they started uploading video earlier this year. The past few months they’ve been doing live streams because of the quarantine/lockdown, but they’ll be continuing that going forward for those like me who aren’t able to physically attend. I plan to when I’m able, though. 113. Would you call either of your parents screw ups? Absolutely not! 114. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? Yes. 115. What do you want to do with your life? I don’t know. That’s the problem.

116. Let me guess… You have brown hair? Naturally, yes, but not currently. 117. Already know what you’re being for Halloween? I don’t dress up or do anything for Halloween anymore. The past few years I’ve just stayed home and watched scary movies. I do for the whole month of October, though. 118. Do you still go Trick or Treating? Uh, no. I’m going to be 31 years old this year. 119. Ever liked someone WAY older than you? Celebrities, but not anyone “in real life.” 120. Does it bother you when people have really loud conversations on the bus? It didn’t really bother me back when I had to take the bus sometimes in college. 121. When you have sunglasses on, do you stare at people? I don’t wear sunglasses. Also, staring is rude. I’ve had to deal with people staring at me, mostly kids, all my life. Not cool. 122. Ever had a credit card denied? No. 123. What’s the last movie you watched? Parts of James and the Giant Peach yesterday. 124. Last TV Show? The Golden Girls. 125. You see your Ex making out with one of your friends. What do you do? I don’t have any friends, but I imagine I wouldn’t like seeing that. 126. Ever been called a whore? Jokingly. 127. Are you american? Yes. 128. Ever made yourself throw up? No. 129. Have you ever kissed someone who wasn’t your boyfriend? Yes. Joseph and I did that for the entire time of whatever it was we had going on. 130. Are you Cute or Gross? I’m trash. 131. Does it bother you when people say “LOOK HOW MUCH YOU’VE GROWN!”? No one has said that to me in a very long time. I don’t recall being bothered by it, though. 132. Can you say intelligent things around the guy you like? I don’t like anyone, currently. 133. Ever had the lead in a play? Nope. Never tried out for a play either. 134. What about a solo in a concert? Ha, no. I was in choir in elementary school for a few years, but there definitely weren’t any solo parts for me. 135. What kind of a student are you? I did well. 136. Worst subject? It was always math. 137. Best subject? English. 138. Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. 139. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant? She had a hysterectomy several years ago. 140. How late do you sleep in? Until like 230 or 3ish. 141. Do you edit your profile pictures before posting them? I use a filter. 142. Be 100% honest. Do you have any friends who are uglier than you? I was the ugly friend. 143. Do you believe in love? Well, yeah. It exists. I just feel like I’ll never experience romantic love. I’ve been in love twice, but both times were unrequited. I can’t imagine finding love in return and someone who actually wants to be with me. 144. Would you consider yourself a good student? Didn’t you ask this? 145. Does it bother you when Surveys ask “Did you like this survey?” It just seems kinda pointless cause they likely won’t see it. 146. Salty, Sweet, Sour or Spicy? Salty and sweet. I would have said spicy back in the day, but I can’t eat spicy food anymore. Haven’t been able to for the past few years. D: 147. Are you going into High School this year? Nooooo. Thank goodness. I did my time and graduated over 10 years ago. 148. What about Junior High? Omg, no. I’m old. 149. What is one thing someone could say to you right now that would make you cry? Let’s not try and make me cry. It’s almost 7AM, I should be asleep. 150. Where did you find this note? LiveJournal. 151. Last question. How many unread messages are in your phone? I don’t leave any unread text messages.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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