#kiefer sutherland fan fiction

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @eclecticwildflowers, @illiana-mystery, @onedirectionlovers2014

warnings: swearing, talk of menstruation, ace is a little bit of an asshole but it’s for the good of reader

I drove another car into the garage and set it up for ace. He smiled at me as I climbed out and popped the hood for him.

“thanks babe.” Ace said as he kissed my cheek. “Wanna work on this one?”

“Sure.” I said, smiling back at him as I secured the hood and looked into the engine. “What’s wrong with it?” There was a twinge in my stomach as I leaned into the car a little. I waved it off mentally and looked back over at ace.

“needs a new filter.” Ace shrugged. “Might as well check the oil while you’re in there.” I nodded and pulled aces tools over to me.

“what about the fan belt?” I asked. Ace moved next to me to look.

“yeah might as well change that too.” He nodded. “Let me go get it for you.” I cringed as there was another twinge of pain across my abdomen. I ran my hand across where the pain flared before leaning into the car to work on removing the parts that needed to be removed. “Parts are by the tools. I’m going to work on an oil change next to you.” Ace put his hand on my back so I didn’t jump. I nodded as I winced in pain again.

“sounds good. Thanks.” I shot him a smile and he nodded. His eyebrows furrowed before he walked over to start on the car like he said he would. Throughout the rest of work I was doing, I continued to wince and even had to bite back a soft moan of pain. Ace kept glancing over at me every time I did. “Hnng. Fuck.” I groaned and ace walked over, wiping his hands on a cloth as he grabbed the back of my coveralls, tugging me off the car.

“you’re not ok.” He said, his voice low. “What’s wrong?” I shook my head and smiled at him.

“I’m fine ace.” I tried to assure him. “Let me get back to the car.” I went to move back to the car but his grip on my collar tightened. “Ace. I’m serious.”

“you’re not fine. Everyone here can see it. Eyeball even mentioned something. And eyeball doesn’t notice anything.” I frowned at him.

“ace. I’m serious. I’m fine.” I tried to assure him. Ace sighed and let go of my collar. I went to love back to the car when ace ducked down and put his shoulder against my stomach. Standing up he tipped me over his shoulder, arm across the back of my legs. “Ace!” I cried, making some of the other mechanics look over. Eyeball and Vince started laughing as they walked ace carry me to his office. “Put me down you asshole!” I pounded on his back but it didn’t make him stop. “Merrill!”

“sit.” He said as he dumped me on the couch and gave me a pointed look. I pouted at him as he went around his desk to grab something from a drawer. He tossed me the small bottle and I caught it. I frowned at the bottle and looked back up at him. “Take those.” Ace rounded the desk again to go to the mini fridge in the corner. He pulled out a bottle of water and handed it to me as he sat down next to me.

“pain killers?” I asked as I did what he said. “Why do you have pain killers in your desk?” Ace gave me a wicked grin. “What aren’t you telling me ace? Did you get hurt?” I started to look him over, bottle shaking in my hand as I ran my hand over his arm. Ace caught my hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it.

“they aren’t for me.” He assured me. “They’re for you. That drawer is yours. Didn’t you see me unlock it?” I shook my head. “Well it’s locked. I have a key. I’ll get you one made. But come here. Look.” He pulled me up and unlocked the drawer again. Ace waited for me to open it and I looked over at him with a soft smile.

“ace.” I breathed out as I sat in his chair to rifle through the drawer.

“it’s everything you need for…uh…that time of the month.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know I’m not the best talking about it. Or even waiting for it to end.” He chuckled and I rolled my eyes with a smile. “But you always hurt when it comes round. And I don’t like seeing you hurt.” Ace pulled me back up and wrapped his arms around me, casually taking the bottle and dropping it back into the drawer. “Eyeball mentioned once that you accidentally bled through your coveralls. Whenever someone asked he said you sat in paint. And I vaguely remembered washing them out later so you wouldn’t be embarrassed.” I looked at him and tried to think through when that happened.

“I…I don’t remember that.” I admitted. Ace smiled.

“good.” He leaned his head against mine. “As embarrassing as that has to be, I’m glad you have no idea what I’m talking about. So I stocked up on what you have at your place and what you left at mine. I figured it covered everything.” Ace handed me the key, kissing me softly. “In case you need anything else today. And take the next couple days off. Relax. Sleep. I know you feel exhausted sometimes. Just…” he shrugged and kissed me again. “We’ll cuddle when we get home and wash up.” I nodded and laughed.

“and to think most guys would be embarrassed about this. More than me finding out I bled through my coveralls.” I said, cupping his cheek. “Thank you.” Ace smiled and tugged me closer.

“of course. It’s the least I can do.” He pressed a kiss to my cheek. “Anything for you sweets.”

#kiefer sutherland #kiefer sutherland imagine #kiefer sutherland fan fiction #kiefer sutherland fanfiction #kiefer sutherland fanfic #ace merrill imagine #ace merrill fanfiction #ace merrill fanfic #ace merrill x reader #ace merrill #Monthly series

[titleknown]

Yeah I don't think people should be, like, censored for writing objectionable content; I think the problem with fan spaces in particular is that AO3 is better suited as a Library Of Everything than as a socialization hub, and that the current socialization hubs aren't moderated well enough to prevent bad behavior and make the experience tolerable for everyone. (I actually hung out on fan forums as a kid and I remember it being a bit better in that respect, though maybe I personally just didn't see any misconduct uglier than low-effort trolling.) But yeah "fiction doesn't affect reality" is way too reductive. As an analogy, just because I don't want to arrest Kiefer Sutherland or Clint Eastwood doesn't mean I think 24 and Dirty Harry are harmless, and just because I don't want to arrest Harrison Ford doesn't mean I think tropes around romance in '80s movies were harmless.

[In reference to this post]

Reblogging because this is true and good, and especially this quote:

As an analogy, just because I don't want to arrest Kiefer Sutherland or Clint Eastwood doesn't mean I think 24 and Dirty Harry are harmless, and just because I don't want to arrest Harrison Ford doesn't mean I think tropes around romance in '80s movies were harmless.

Like, I want to emblazon that quote on people's fucking skulls.

Like, I get why people are afraid to embrace that idea, because of how; historically; the main actual praxis regarding What Do We Do with regards to the idea that media affects people has; in fact; tended to be censorship.

And it's understandable why people would react to that by denying that idea, because it's intellectually/societally easy compared to trying to say "Yes, art affects reality, but censorship by the power structure is still a net social ill"

But like... for god's sake, it fails hard when push comes to shove.

#media #media critique #media effects

[cantsayidont]

Haterating and hollerating through the '90s:

POSTCARDS FROM THE EDGE (1990): Carrie Fisher scripted this witty adaptation of her novel about coked-up, pill-popping actress Suzanne Yale (Meryl Streep), who overdoses in the bed of a strange man (Dennis Quaid), ends up in rehab, and learns that the only way the production insurance company will let her keep working is if she stays with her mother, an aging singer-actress-diva (Shirley MacLaine) whose love for her daughter is equaled only by her tireless determination to upstage her. (No, it's not autobiographical at all, why do you ask?) Fisher's deftly paced, funny script weaves in various serious mother-daughter moments without ever becoming mawkish, and offers a fabulous part for MacLaine, who has a ball poking fun at herself as well as Debbie Reynolds, Fisher's real-life mother and the obvious basis for the film's lightly fictionalized "Doris Mann." Curiously, the weakest link is Streep, who never quite sheds her customary air of prim affectation and always seems ill at ease with Fisher's layers of self-deprecating, sarcastic humor. CONTAINS LESBIANS? Apparently not, although I had questions about Suzanne's rehab friend Aretha (Robin Barlett). VERDICT: MacLaine's finest hour, but Streep's primness keeps it "good" rather than "great."

TERESA'S TATTOO (1993): Painfully unfunny crime comedy, directed by Melissa Etheridge's then-GF Julie Cypher and costarring Cypher's ex, Lou Diamond Phillips, along with an array of incongruously high-profile actors like Joe Pantoliano, Tippi Hedren, Mare Winningham, Diedrich Bader, k.d. lang (!), Sean Astin, Emilio Estevez, and Kiefer Sutherland, most in bit parts (some of them unbilled). The headache-inducing plot concerns a couple of brain-dead thugs whose elaborate hostage scheme hits a snag when their hostage (Adrienne Shelly) accidentally dies. Their solution is to kidnap lookalike Teresa (also Adrienne Shelly), a brainy Ph.D. candidate, and disguise her to look like the dead girl — including giving her a matching tattoo on her chest — in the hopes that the dead girl's idiot brother (C. Thomas Howell) won't notice the switch until it's too late. This truly bad grade-Z effort, barely released theatrically, feels like either a vanity project or a practical joke that got out of hand, and is interesting mostly as a curiosity for Melissa Etheridge fans: The soundtrack is M.E.-heavy, and Etheridge herself has a brief nonspeaking role. CONTAINS LESBIANS? Technically? (Etheridge has no lines and lang plays a Jesus freak.) VERDICT: May erode your affection for M.E.

BLUE JUICE (1995): Tiresome comedy-drama about an aging surfer (a terribly miscast, painfully uncomfortable-looking Sean Pertwee) who's still determined to continue living like a 20-year-old surf bum with his obnoxious mates, even though his back is giving out and he's perilously close to driving away his girlfriend (a disconcertingly hot 25-year-old Catherine Zeta Jones), who is keen for him to finally cut the shit. Meanwhile, the scummiest of his mates (Ewan McGregor) doses their pal Terry (Peter Gunn) and gets him to chase after an actress from his childhood favorite TV show (Jenny Agutter) in hopes of dissuading from marrying his actual girlfriend (Michelle Chadwick), and their mate Josh (Steven Mackintosh), a successful techno producer, flirts with an attractive DJ (Colette Brown) who's actually furious at him for building a vapid techno hit around a sample of her soul singer dad's biggest hit. The latter storyline probably had the most potential (although a weird scene where Josh is castigated by a group of outraged soul fans seems like a lesser TWILIGHT ZONE plot), but none of the script's various threads ever amounts to much. CONTAINS LESBIANS? It doesn't even pass the Bechdel test. VERDICT: If you happen upon it, you may be tempted just for Zeta Jones (and/or Brown), but the rest wears out its welcome with alacrity.

HIGHER LEARNING (1995): Potent story of simmering racial tensions on the campus of a university that definitely isn't USC (writer-director John Singleton's alma mater, and where most of the film was obviously shot), let down by incredibly heavy-handed execution. (The film's final shot is of the word "UNLEARN" superimposed over a giant American flag!) A capable cast (including Omar Epps, Kristy Swanson, Michael Rapaport, Jennifer Connelly, Ice Cube, Tyra Banks, Cole Hauser, Laurence Fishburne, and Regina King) tries to maintain a sense of emotional reality through Singleton's frequent excursions into overpowering melodrama, but there are so many competing plot threads that few characters have any depth; curiously, the script's most complex characterization is in the scenes between budding white supremacist Remy (Rapaport) and Aryan Brotherhood organizer Scott (Hauser). Singleton made this film when he was 25, and there's no shame in its sense of breathless ambition (even if it inevitably bites off more than it can chew), but the overwrought stridency undercuts its intended impact. For a more effective treatment of similar themes in roughly the same period, try Gilbert Hernandez's graphic novel X, originally serialized in LOVE & ROCKETS #31–39 and first collected in 1993. CONTAINS LESBIANS? Jennifer Connelly gives Kristy Swanson a bisexual awakening. VERDICT: The '90s through a bullhorn.

CRASH (1996): Divisive David Cronenberg adaptation of the J.G. Ballard novel, about a movie producer called James Ballard (James Spader) and his desperately horny wife (Deborah Kara Unger), drawn into a loose-knit group of car-crash fetishists organized around a man called Vaughan (Elias Koteas at his creepiest), who stages recreations of famous celebrity crashes like the 1955 accident that killed James Dean. Despite some pretentious dialogue about "the reshaping of the human body by modern technology," the controlling idea might be better summarized as "anything can be a paraphilia if you get weird enough about it." Part of what offends people about the film is that Cronenberg deliberately treats the entire story with the same frosty clinical detachment, rendering the "normal" sex scenes just as remote and perverse as the characters' fixation on the grisly aftermath of car wrecks; the point is that there is no line, just different facets of the same erotic longing, which each of the (admittedly unsympathetic) principal characters embodies in different ways. Spader, Kara Unger, and Koteas are very good, as is Holly Hunter, in perhaps the bravest role of her career, but Rosanna Arquette is underutilized. A worthwhile companion piece would be Steven Soderbergh's 1989 SEX, LIES, AND VIDEOTAPE, also with Spader, which is much more highly regarded (though almost as contrived and scarcely less perverse), perhaps because it seeks to titillate where Cronenberg does not. CONTAINS LESBIANS? Briefly. (See previous note in re: underutilization of Rosanna Arquette.) VERDICT: Icy but interesting.

#movies #hateration holleration #postcards from the edge #carrie fisher #meryl streep #shirley maclaine #debbie reynolds #teresa's tattoo #julie cypher #melissa etheridge #adrienne shelly #kd lang #blue juice #sean pertwee #catherine zeta jones #ewan mcgregor #crash 1996 #david cronenberg #j.g. ballard #james spader #deborah kara unger #crash #holly hunter #sex lies and videotape #john singleton #higher learning #higher learning 1995 #omar epps

[twh-news]

Loki Season 2 Episode 3 Review: A Major Problem

★★★☆☆

[Article contains spoilers]

There's a big TVA reunion afoot in the third episode of Loki season two.

A headache-inducing episode of Loki gets underway in the 1800s this week, as Ravonna Renslayer finally pops up on the Sacred Timeline with Miss Minutes in tow. He Who Remains’ promise in the season one finale – that if Sylvie killed him he’d just end up right back on top – seems to hinge on a plan to kickstart a kind of causal loop, where a past variant receives a copy of OB’s TVA guidebook and is inspired to create all manner of technological inventions, including a rough version of the temporal loom.

There are positives and negatives to this trip back in time. It’s great to have Gugu Mbatha-Raw and Tara Strong back as the ruthless Renslayer and Miss Minutes respectively. The pair are dynamite together here, and I’m still fully able to suspend my disbelief and buy into the talking animated clock on screen as a real presence. Miss Minutes’ old timey black and white look is an incredible visual flourish.

The Balder the Brave chatter between Loki and Mobius is also a really fun Easter egg for fans who have been charting the character’s failure to launch in the MCU since Kenneth Branagh’s first Thor movie, and it looks like Daniel Craig will never get to throw on Balder’s costume now. Loki’s “I don’t know her” attitude got a real good laugh out of me regardless.

The 1893 World’s Fair is a fascinating setting for the introduction of Victor Timely (Jonathan Majors). As Mobius alludes, so many key historical events were happening around this time, including many of the horrific crimes committed by serial killer H. H. Holmes. A lot of visual effects work has clearly been put in to recreate the vibes of the era, but depending on which shot we’re dealing with it’s hit and miss. The Ferris Wheel sequence is perhaps the most engaging of them all, as Sylvie and Loki call back to the season one finale, battling it out for Timely’s soul while he’s thrown around the passenger car.

Timely himself is the real problem. Setting aside his troubling legal problems for a moment, Majors’ performance as Victor is just awful, though I fear this is another “your mileage may vary” situation. I admittedly really enjoyed the acting choices Majors made as both He Who Remains and Kang the Conqueror, but his execution here took me right out. It’s just way too pantomime, making Oscar Isaac’s turn as Steven Grant in Moon Knight seem almost reserved in comparison. It actually reminds me of Kiefer Sutherland in Dark City a bit. I love that movie, but I can understand why people hated his performance in it. For what it’s worth, my colleagues at Den of Geek didn’t have a problem with Majors’ Doctor Who guest star-esque Timely at all. This one may just be divisive!

Much more entertaining is Miss Minutes’ continuing transition from helpful AI to unhinged cartoon bunny boiler. Miss Minutes’ romantic (and clearly erotic) obsession with her maker is sincerely touching and troubling; her love for He Who Remains/Victor teetering into pure rage at moments. Strong is able to fully flex her notable voice talents in these scenes. It’s a real rollercoaster to hear her despairing monologue descend into fury and panic. I applaud this arc for Miss Minutes, personally. Sci-fi writers will often create fictional AI that gets mad and kills us, but hardly any of them are brave enough to ask “what if it was also really horny?”

Along with Strong’s nightmarish performance, Di Martino gets more to do as Sylvie in episode three, and the character’s inner conflict over killing Timely is palpable. It’s interesting that she decides not to slay him again, and that the punishment she dishes out to her violent pruner Ravonna is non-lethal. Sylvie always seems destined to wrestle with whether or not to play God, which is clearly a work-in-progress when you’re a God!

As the episode comes to a close, we leave Victor joining our TVA good guys and Ravonna and Miss Minutes stranded at the end of time, with Miss Minutes about to drop one hell of a truth bomb on Ravonna. I guess we’ll have to wait and see how angry she gets about it next week.

#loki #loki series #tom hiddleston #review #den of geek #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #spoilers

[youngfcs]

eyy cibelle! this is my first time asking but maybe it might be pretty complicated…i'm writing a 90s fan fiction on wattpad and i chose as a fc one of the "symbol" of that year : the princess of pop BRITNEY SPEARS. but i can't find some fcs that can pass as her mother and father. would you help? pls 😭🙏🏼

Hello there! ohhh I love her so much 😭 I'll give you some options, hope you like it :)

Mother:

Calista Flockhart (49-57)

Denise Richards (43-51)

Elizabeth Mitchell (44-52)

January Jones (36-44)

Kelly Rutherford (45-53)

Father:

Kiefer Sutherland (47-55)

Linus Roache (50-58)

Mark Pellegrino (49-57)

Patrick Dempsey (48-56)

Rob Estes (51-59)

(cib)

[they-cloned-tyrone-online-romana]

Urmăriți ― They Cloned Tyrone Filmul (2023) Online in Româna

Urmăriți filme They Cloned Tyrone Online Subtitrate (2023) Gratis in Româna, Vezi They Cloned Tyrone la înaltă deFiniție și la calitate HD.

They Cloned Tyrone este un film american de comedie științifico- fantastică din 2023.

Unde să vizionezi filmele They Cloned Tyrone online cu subtitrăte gratuite:

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Premiera They Cloned Tyrone (2023) la Cinema in cinemov

They Cloned Tyrone | Premiera la Cinema Elvire Popesco, Cinema Elvire Popesco, Bucharest, July 21 2023 | cinemov.lat

Unde să urmărești They Cloned Tyrone?

mai multe moduri de a viziona online filme They Cloned Tyrone în SUA Puteți utiliza servicii de streaming precum Netflix, Hulu sau Amazon Prime Video. De asemenea, puteți închiria sau cumpăra filme pe iTunes sau Google Play. vizionați la cerere sau pe aplicații de streaming disponibile pe televizor sau pe dispozitivul dvs. de streaming, dacă aveți cablu.

Ce este un film They Cloned Tyrone?

They Cloned Tyrone este un film american de comedie științifico- fantastică din 2023 , regizat de Juel Taylor în debutul său regizoral, dintr-un scenariu de Taylor și Tony Rettenmaier. Filmul îi are în distribuție pe John Boyega , Teyonah Parris și Jamie Foxx (care este și producător) ca un trio improbabil care descoperă o conspirație guvernamentală de clonare . David Alan Grier și Kiefer Sutherland apar și în roluri secundare.

Dezvoltarea filmului a început în februarie 2019, când scenariul a fost opționat din Lista Neagră de către MACRO Media. A fost conceput ca un omagiu care distruge genurile filmelor Blaxploitation din anii 1970, prezentând elemente de satiră , groază și umor absurd . Brian Tyree Henry a fost inițial atașat să joace ca rol principal, dar în cele din urmă a fost înlocuit de Boyega în octombrie 2019. Parris și Foxx s-au alăturat distribuției în septembrie 2020. Filmările au avut loc în Atlanta , Georgia , din noiembrie 2020 până în aprilie 2021.

când apare filmul lui They Cloned Tyrone în romana?

They Cloned Tyrone a avut premiera la Festivalul american de film negru pe 14 iunie 2023. A început o lansare limitată în cinematografe pe 14 iulie 2023, înainte de a fi difuzat pe Netflix o săptămână mai târziu. Filmul a primit recenzii pozitive din partea criticilor, cu laude deosebite îndreptate către interpretarea rolului principal.

cine l-a jucat pe They Cloned Tyrone film?

În rolurile principale : John Boyega ca Fontaine Teyonah Parris ca Yo-Yo Jamie Foxx ca Slick Charles David Alan Grier Kiefer Sutherland J. Alphonse Nicholson ca Issac Tamberla Perry ca Biddy Eric Robinson Jr. în rolul lui Big Moss

Informații complete despre filmele lui They Cloned Tyrone

They Cloned Tyrone (2023) R 06/14/2023 (US) Comedy, Science Fiction, Mystery 2h 2m

They Cloned Tyrone pe Disney Plus?

Nu există niciun semn de They Cloned Tyrone Trail pe Disney+, dovadă că Casa șoarecilor nu are control asupra întregii francize! Acasă la titluri precum „Războiul Stelelor”, „Marvel”, „Pixar”, topurile National GThey Cloned Tyrone, ESPN, STAR și multe altele, Disney+ este disponibil pentru un abonament anual de 79,99 USD sau o taxă lunară de 0,99 USD. Dacă sunteți doar un fan al uneia dintre aceste mărci, merită să vă înscrieți la Disney+ și nici măcar nu există reclame.

They Cloned Tyrone la HBO Max?

Ne pare rău, dar The They Cloned Tyrone Way nu este disponibil pe HBO Max. Există o mulțime de conținut HBO Max pentru 14,99 USD pe lună, acest abonament este fără reclame și vă oferă acces la fiecare titlu din biblioteca HBO Max. Platforma de streaming a anunțat o versiune susținută de reclame care costă mult mai puțin la 9,99 USD pe lună.

They Cloned Tyrone pe Amazon VidThey Cloned Tyrone?

Din păcate, They Cloned Tyrone Path by Water nu este disponibil pentru streaming gratuit pe Amazon Prime VidThey Cloned Tyrone. Cu toate acestea, puteți alege alte emisiuni și filme de vizionat de aici, deoarece are o mare varietate de emisiuni și filme din care să alegeți pentru 14,99 USD pe lună.

They Cloned Tyrone la Peacock?

Calea They Cloned Tyrone nu poate fi urmărită pe Peacock în momentul scrierii. Peacock oferă abonamente pentru 4,99 USD pe lună sau 49,99 USD pe an pentru un cont premium. După cum sugerează și numele, platforma de streaming poate juca gratuit cu conținut în aer liber, chiar dacă este limitat.

They Cloned Tyrone la Paramount Plus?

The Road to Water de They Cloned Tyrone nu este pe Paramount Plus. Paramount Plus oferă opțiunile de abonament potrivite: o versiune de bază acceptată de reclame a Paramount + Essential pentru 4,99 USD pe lună și un plan premium fără anunțuri pentru 9,99 USD pe lună.

Unde pot viziona They Cloned Tyrone gratuit?

Cinemamov este un site web care oferă gratuit peste 20.000 de filme în streaming de toate genurile. Când vă înregistrați, veți găsi filme HD nelimitate, un catalog uriaș de răsfoit și o bară de căutare care vă permite să găsiți toate filmele pe care doriți să le vizionați.

Vă întrebați cum să transmiteți în mod legal They Cloned Tyrone gratuit? Dacă da, te vei bucura că este cu adevărat posibil, deoarece în prezent există mai multe site-uri în Italia unde poți viziona gratuit filme de toate genurile și epocile. În unele cazuri, poate fi necesar să vă înregistrați prin e-mail sau să utilizați contul dvs. online pentru a vă autentifica.

Vă voi spune în detaliu cum puteți reda filme în flux gratuit folosind cele mai populare site-uri web, servicii online și aplicații pentru smartphone/tabletă. Cinemav este unul dintre cele mai bune site-uri. Oferta de filme variază de la cele mai noi până la clasice din istoria cinematografiei, de la filme americane la filme italiene, de la horror la comedii… pe scurt, libertatea de alegere, numărul de filme este impresionant. Desigur, nu le vei găsi când mergi la film.

#They Cloned Tyrone Film 2023 #They Cloned Tyrone Film Online #They Cloned Tyrone Online Subtitrat

[screenandcinema]

Coming to Your Screen March 2023

Here is a list of new shows coming to television or streaming services this month:

True Lies - Based on the 1994 film of the same name comes a new action series about an international spy and a keep-in-the-dark suburban housewife. (Coming to CBS on March 1st)

Daisy Jones and The Six - This miniseries, based on the acclaimed novel, follows a rock band in the 1970s. Riley Keough and Sam Claflin star in this drama made for fans of Almost Famous. (Coming to Amazon Prime on March 3rd)

History of the World, Part II - More than forty years since originally promised comes the sequel to Mel Brooks’ 1981 comedy. (Coming to Hulu on March 6th)

School Spirits - Peyton List is haunting her high school in this new series teen ghosts. (Coming to Paramount+ on March 9th)

A Spy Among Friends - Damian Lewis and Guy Pearce star in this upcoming espionage thriller. (Coming to MGM+ - formerly Epix - on March 12th)

Gotham Knights - After the death of Bruce Wayne, younger members of the Batman family carry the mantle in Gotham City in this new series. (Coming to the CW on March 14th)

Agent Elvis - What if Elvis Presley was also a secret government spy? Check out this new animated series featuring the voice of Matthew McConaughey to see the King in action. (Coming to Netflix on March 17th)

Extrapolations - This upcoming anthology series from Scott Z. Burns looks at the effects of climate change on the Earth in the future. It is impossible to list the cast here, everyone is in this, including Meryl Streep. (Coming to AppleTV+ on March 17th)

Swarm - Dominique Fishback stars in this new horror thriller about the dark side of fandom from Donald Glover and Janine Nabers (Coming to Amazon Prime on March 17th)

Lucky Hank - Fresh off Better Call Saul, Bob Odenkirk is back on AMC with this adaption of the novel Straight Man. (Coming to AMC on March 19th)

The Night Agent - Gabriel Basso is an FBI Agent tasked to wait for a phone to ring in the basement of the White House. Seems like a boring job, right? Well, that is until it rings. (Coming to Netflix on March 23rd)

Rabbit Hole - Kiefer Sutherland returns to television as a corporate spy framed for murder in this new thriller. (Coming to Paramount+ on March 26th)

Great Expectations - Hitting Hulu this month comes a new adaptation of the Dickens novel everyone claims to have read in high school and didn’t. Yes, this is the one with Pip. (Coming to Hulu on March 26th)

The Big Door Prize - Chris O’Dowd stars in this comedy based on a novel of the same name. (Coming to AppleTV+ on March 29th)

The Power - Toni Collette and John Leguizamo star in this science fiction drama about a world where teenage girls suddenly get the power to control electricity. (Coming to Amazon Prime on March 31st)

-MB-

[actualearthling]

Dark City: So Many Unanswered Questions

!Spoilers! (I mean, duh, it’s a 1998 film).

“Dark City is a 1998 Australian-American neo-noir science fiction film directed by Alex Proyas and starring Rufus Sewell, Kiefer Sutherland, Jennifer Connelly, Richard O’Brien, and William Hurt. The screenplay was written by Proyas, Lem Dobbs, and David S. Goyer.

Primarily shot at Fox Studios Australia, the film was jointly produced by New Line Cinema and Proyas’ production company Mystery Clock Cinema and distributed by the former for theatrical release. The film premiered in the United States on February 27th, 1998, and was nominated for a Hugo Award for the Best Dramatic Presentation and six Saturn Awards. It received generally positive critiques, even though it was a box office bomb. Roger Ebert expressed interest in this film, and he appreciated its art direction, set design, cinematography, special effects, and imagination. Some critics have noted its similarities to and influence on The Matrix, which came out a year later. The film is widely considered a sci-fi cult classic.”

Director Alex Proyas is known for his effects-driven filmmaking. He’d already made a big impact with The Crow in 1994. And now Dark City would be a memorialization of his out-of-this-world storytelling (yes, that was a pun). And it categorically was, according to hard sci-fi fans and critics. Though it did less than fantastic at the box office.

 The entire film was shot on constructed sets with zero location shoots. This adds a sense of designed falseness and is crucial in the rest of the story. Fun fact: The Matrix was shot on the sets that had been made for Dark City!

The Matrix was released a year after Dark City, and it also deals with a creepy oppressive force controlling the perceptions and memories of its citizens. They also both revolve around a hero breaking free from their mind control, and the villains trying to capture and contain him. In the end, the heroes use the villains’ powers against them.

 In Dark City, all human memories are newly fabricated when the hands of the clock reach 12. This is referred to as “midnight,” but the term is deceptive because there is no noon. There is never any daylight for the inhabitants at all. Hence the title. “First came darkness, then came the Strangers,” we are told in the opening narration. John Murdoch, the hero, asks Bumstead, the police detective: “When was the last time you remember doing something during the day?” Bumstead is surprised by the question. “You know something?” Murdoch asks him. “I don’t think the sun even exists in this place. I’ve been up for hours and hours, and the night never ends here.”

  About that narration that the studio insisted on, Proyas hated it. It essentially spills the plot right out, in the beginning, leaving no mystery to what’s to come for much of the film. The studio insisted on it because apparently, they thought audiences are stupid and would be frustrated desperately trying to figure out what was happening and give up on the film. Proyas did finally get his way when the director’s cut was released without the narration.

Their civilization is dying. The narration explains that the Strangers came from another galaxy and abducted a group of humans. Considering the style of the city the extraterrestrials create, I can speculate that these humans were at least, originally abducted around the 1940s. Either that, or it came after, and the ghouls are just big film noir fans. Though through Murdoch’s memories we see brief flashbacks from Shell Beach, and it looks pretty old-timey. We also have no idea how long they have had these humans captive. It appears time stops, and we get the impression that people aren’t aging. Seeing that the strangers seem to be able to bend and shape reality and space, it goes to reason that they also are capable of controlling time. I found myself thinking how strange it would be if the humans had been taken in the 1940s, but in earth time the year was a hundred, even a thousand years in the future. Then some space-faring future humans would come upon the city and rescue the no longer captive humans. I will bring that idea back up when we get to the end of the film.

The Strangers are seeking the secret of the human soul, which they think could be the key to extending their lives. We only get a bit of an idea as to how they plan to use our souls to accomplish this at the end of the movie. And it still leaves me with many questions. They create a vast artificial city, which can be remanufactured, rebuilt, rearranged, or “tuned,” whenever they want to run another experiment. We see the tuning taking place. All humans lose consciousness. All machinery stops. The city changes. Skyscrapers are extruded from the primordial materials of the underworld, architecture is devised, rooms are prepared for their inhabitants, and props are physically set in place by the aliens. Aided by a human scientist, the Strangers “imprint” or inject memories into the foreheads of their test subjects. When humans awaken, they have no memory of the time before; everything they remember has been injected from a communal memory bank. The experiments are to discover things like if a man commits murder one day and then is given a new identity, is he still capable of committing murder? Are men inherently good or evil, or is it a matter of how they think of themselves? What about humans creates a soul that can’t be destroyed? And can they harness that for themselves?

The Strangers occupy the bodies of human cadavers. Most of them are tall. One is in a child’s body, which is always an incredibly creepy concept. The alien beings themselves, living inside the corpses, look like spiders made of frightened noodles. They can levitate, they can change the matter of the city at will, they have a hive insect organization, and they gather in a subterranean cavern to collectively retune the city. 

The movie begins with John Murdoch (Rufus Sewell) awakening alone in a strange hotel to find that he is wanted for a series of brutal murders of prostitutes. The problem is that he can’t remember whether he committed the murders or not. The memories injected by the Strangers have not been completely incorporated. The memory injection was administered by Dr. Schreber (Kiefer Sutherland), a scientist who works for the Strangers but clearly hates and fears them. For one moment, John is convinced that he has gone mad. Dr. Schreber calls the motel room and reveals to him that he will now be in great danger from the Strangers, as he was subjected to a failed experiment, and he must get away quickly.

That sets the story into motion. Murdoch wanders through the city, trying to discover its nature. Detective Bumstead (William Hurt) tries to catch him for the serial murders but will gradually be won over by Murdoch’s questions (he is programmed as a cop, but not a very good one). As Murdoch edges closer to solving the mystery, he stumbles upon the underworld of the Strangers. During one escape attempt while being pursued by the Strangers, he finds himself drawn to a billboard of Shell Beach. Where his flashes of memory all take place. When Murdoch tries to break through it in frustration, it is revealed that it was no mere billboard on a wall. The Strangers come upon them, Murdoch breaks through the billboard, a Stranger attacks, and poor Detective Bumstead gets sucked out into space. But of course, it’s no great shock since the narration already ruined the reveal of the humans being on a spaceship at the beginning of the film. John is then forced to surrender, as the strangers have captured his wife, Emma, and are threatening to kill her. The Strangers force the captured Dr. Schreber to imprint John with new memories, but the Doctor instead, imprints John with the knowledge to destroy the Strangers by taking over the underground machine they use to tune the city instead.

During an intense telekinetic battle, John kills the strangers and frees the captive Dr. Schreber. John then uses his powers to create the Shell Beach from his memories. The beach, sea, and for the first time, they see the sun in their city.

Then the humans reawaken, and John reunites with Emma, expectedly to live out the life they had together on Earth at Shell Beach.

This ending left me with so many questions about the future of the abducted humans.

John will add sunlight, the beach, and perhaps other left-out details, but is he thinking of all the other things that the creatures took care of? What was creating the food and water? If they were stopping aging, will he know how to do that? Will he be able to supply all the society’s needs or were they better off under the creatures’ than under his care? He’s becoming their god. If he can remake matter, can he turn the city into a functioning spaceship and guide them back to Earth or any human life-sustaining planet? They can’t all live in the city together. Have they been sterilized? Will they procreate? In successive generations, won’t they run out of living space?

The cabbie that Murdoch gets a ride with said he took his honeymoon at Shell Beach when John asked him how to get there. He gets frustrated when he tries to remember the way but can’t. Was everyone abducted from the same town? What are the odds that this cabbie out of all the abducted humans had been to what looks like a small beach town? Could the Strangers have abducted an entire town?

It is not unheard of for towns and communities to vanish quickly without a trace.

The colony of Roanoke in North Carolina, USA. The Ancestral Puebloans in Utah. An entire cargo ship called the Mary Celeste was found with its crew mysteriously all missing in 1872. We have also lost entire airplanes like the case of Malaysian Airlines Flight 370.

I also wonder so much about Dr. Schreber. As my favorite character in the film, I feel like we could have known him so much better. Was he randomly picked up with the other abductees? Doubt it. The Strangers would have to have gotten extremely lucky to have accidentally caught a scientist with the skills to create their memory potions and treat the other humans. So, he must be special. Maybe they stalked him on Earth. I mean, he is the only human scientist they have. He must be especially talented. He seems to have a mental illness. He’s nervous and paranoid. That could be a result of being the human slave of the strangers and all alone in his knowledge of their reality. What was he like before the abduction?  Why did he help Murdoch in the opening? He’s not told Murdoch can tune until the pool scene. Did the procedure in the hotel room go wrong randomly? Did the Dr. have any inclination that Murdoch was special, or evolving as he said?

 Dark City needs a comic series.

My Blog:

#aliens #paranormal #ufo #alien #alien abductee #alien abduction #spooky #uap #men in black #mib #film noir #scifi #sci fi movies #horror #horror movies

[jimmyfissionart]

Sleep now...

#dark city #movies #art #my art #fan art #digital art #sci fi #science fiction #alex proyas #rufus sewell #jennifer connelly #kiefer sutherland #an entire weeks worth of work for a movie nobody's seen #but it's good one

[thefreshprinceofconheir]

when your internet comes back on half way through a rousing bout of the chrome no connection game:

#i had such a high score and the page refreshed! #and then i was left looking at the same old kiefer sutherland x reader fan fiction i was reading before it went out. #no fair! #i am going to sue for whatever is left of google’s stocks. #ic

[juanbreaksitdown]

Playing MGSV for the First Time Knowing the Twist, Part 0: Ground Zeroes

I’m a big Metal Gear fan but I dropped out sometime after MGS4. I’ve recently begun playing MGSV but I already know the twist about a certain character’s true identity. Still, the rest of the game is new to me and I’m ready to let Hideo Kojima break down my perceptual reality and teach me war is hell all over again. I’ll be chronicling my takes on the game as I go through it, starting with this post.

MISSION START

It’s been a while since I’ve done some tactical espionage action, so I died a bunch playing even this tutorial level. Good to see the ol’ TIME PARADOX death screen, reminding us that history is already written.

On PS4, the graphics on Big Boss look great. Kiefer Sutherland slots into the voice nicely. Admittedly, David Hayter will always be Snake to me, thanks to nostalgia.

I love that the series has added a ton of quality of life adjustments since its last main console release, with hints and instructions given without too much handholding by both Kaz on the radio and the design of the level itself. Kojima’s design chops have always been as strong as his penchant for indulging in meta-fiction. I remember being dropped into the first challenge of MGS1, where you have to enter Shadow Moses from the outside, and finding it difficult to know what I was looking out for.

Granted, I was a child. This game is easier now.

Speaking of children, I’m pretty comfortable saying that this is the darkest opening to a Metal Gear game full stop. To begin with, you’re rescuing children as part of Big Boss’s MSF. Metal Gear has spent a good long time telling us that child soldiers - and children being involved in war at all - are not good. MGS2 sees E.E. die trying to help Snake and her step brother Otacon. Raiden himself is a child soldier, which leads him to be emotionally closed off. Sunny ends up helping save the day in MGS4, but Snake and Otacon, having seen the brutality of war and how it permanently harms children even if they survive, keep her away from the fighting as much as possible. Kojima’s stance on child soldiers has always been - unsurprisingly - that they are a heinous crime and a symptom of a system which knows no morality, only conquest accomplished by feeding humans into a flesh-rending machine for money.

The existence of children that you must rescue from a PoW camp shows that this is far beyond Big Boss realizing the President made him kill his mother figure, lied about why, and still wanted to shake his hand. We are at the precipice before the inevitability of Outer Heaven and Solid Snake. And it’s only getting darker.

Paz, the little girl I just rescued, has had a bomb sewn into her gut. Here I become impressed with the care put into animating Big Boss - Kojima has always seen himself as bridging the gap between film and games so he treats his characters like actors. Their body language matters, not just their voice acting and mechanics. Big Boss’s body language couldn’t be clearer when he realizes what’s happening aboard the helicopter. Gone is the confident super soldier and master of CQC: he raises his hands nervously, like an overwhelmed new parent whose child is sick. He doesn’t know what to do; he knows his skill set as a soldier is completely helpless against a medical crime such as this. He believes in a world where this doesn’t have to happen, but to make it exist, he has to endure this part. He is just as much of a child as he was when he was deceived into killing the Boss. The child is raising children and all his strength and cunning won’t stop the hurt.

Kojima forces us to watch Paz’s guts get opened up and sifted through while Snake holds her down. The panic in her body conveys the pain viscerally. Kojima’s stance that war isn’t a game and treating it like one only removes humanity from the greatest aggressors is clear even as he makes war games. He wants us to know that this is the cost of using war to battle a world controlled by war. It’s not to be fetishized.

The bomb is retrieved, and all seems well. With a little bit of quiet, Kaz rages against their situation impotently. They were played like damn fiddles.

And the tune isn’t over.

Paz announces there’s a second bomb in her… (we don’t get to find out where specifically, I’m going to assume something only mildly horrific and not speculate too hard for my brain’s sake). She jumps out of the chopper, but it’s too late. Her proximity to the chopper immolates all inside and our mission ends. Kojima’s theming is already strong here. The bomb you see, the bomb you catch, is bad. Horrible. More awful than you ever wanted to deal with.

The second bomb is worse.

Indeed, in this series which began on the dangers of nuclear proliferation, Kojima has called out the two bombs which make his message a necessity. The Little Boy, dropped on Hiroshima, was the first and only uranium bomb dropped. 98% of the material did not undergo fission. It obliterated the city nonetheless. The second bomb, Fat Man, was plutonium and devastated Nagasaki, cementing the nuclear bomb as the ultimate in material destruction.

In Metal Gear Solid 2, the first bomb, that the S3 plan was the Solid Snake Simulation, blew the audience’s mind as they learned anyone could be Solid Snake, soldier genes be damned, so long as they experienced the right soldier memes. The second bomb, that your perceptual reality was constructed by sociobiological AI too vastly powerful to be understood by a single mind and the true S3 plan was to curate digital media to its normative liking in the Selection for Societal Sanity, is the one people remember Metal Gear Solid 2 for.

In Metal Gear Solid 3, the Virtuous Mission ends in the disaster of the Boss defecting and Volgin firing the Davey Crockett nuke. Operation Snake Eater ends with Snake realizing his life is a lie; that the nation he has given his life to will never respect it, only burn it as fuel for its own ends.

Here, we have begun with Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes and one bomb has gone off.

The second bomb, I can only assume, has been armed and left for Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain

I’m already excited.

#Metal Gear #metal gear solid #metal gear soild 5 #Metal Gear Solid V #Metal Gear Series #Metal Gear Solid 2 #Metal Gear Solid 3 #MGS #MGSV #MGS2 #MGS3 #Naked Snake #Big Boss #Solid Snake #Hideo Kojima #the phantom pain #ground zeroes

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @eclecticwildflowers, @onedirectionlovers2014, @itzjustalexxx

warnings: mention of smut, swearing

I laughed as ace tried to pull me back into bed. His hands wrapped around my waist as he gently tugged me back towards him.

“ace.” I jokingly whined. “Let me go!” Aces laughter mixed with mine. “I’m going to the bathroom. Unless you want to clean up the damn mess…” aces hands left my waist and I ran out of the bed. He was still laughing as I slammed the door shut. After a few seconds, it opened a crack and my underwear was thrown in with the shirt ace had been wearing the night before. Once I was done doing what I needed to do, I got dressed and emerged from the bathroom to find ace laying in bed in his boxers.

“Oh good.” He said with a smile as he opened his arms for me to return to.

“what was that about?” I asked as I curled up against him, fingers splayed out on his chest and drawing random shapes.

“Well last night you said no sex in the morning.” Ace shrugged as he ran his fingers through my hair, using his other hand to drape my legs over his. “I couldn’t stand by that if you weren’t wearing a damn thing. So there. Now you’re dressed and I’m not thinking of all the ways I could fuck your into oblivion.” Ace toyed with the sleeve of his shirt. “I mean I still kind of am since you look so good in my clothes. But it’s not as bad as it was.” I blushed as I buried my face in his neck. “What? What did I say?”

“you’re really sweet you know that?” I said, pulling back to kiss him before hiding my face again. “Too adorable for your own good i say.” Ace grumbled and I gently tugged him back down so I could lay on his chest. “The big, bad, tough ace Merrill giving his partner his clothes so he doesn’t get too worked up.” Ace growled and rolled us over, pinning my wrists by my head as my back hit the mattress.

“not a fucking word of this leaves this room. Got it?” He growled. “The cobras never find out about this. Understood?” I nodded as I let my eyes rake over ace above me. “Oh no you don’t. I’ve been good. I ain’t falling for this.” Ace let go of my wrists and pulled back to sit on his heels. “Nope. I’m following your rules. No morning sex today.” He shook his head and pointed his finger at me.

“ace.” I laughed as I sat up, holding my hand out to him so we could lay back and cuddle some more. “I swear. They’ll never hear it from me.” Ace nodded as he let me use him as a pillow again.

“good.” He said. “You’re the only person who gets to know this little secret.”

#ace merrill #ace merrill x reader #ace merrill fanfic #ace merrill imagine #ace merrill fanfiction #kiefer sutherland #kiefer sutherland imagine #kiefer sutherland fan fiction #kiefer sutherland fanfiction #kiefer sutherland fanfic

[crowdvscritic]

round up // MARCH + APRIL 21

March and April were a whirlwind of vaccines and awards shows! A full year after we starting staying at home, the end of this weird chapter in recent history seems like it might finally be coming to a close, and this pop culture awards season—typically a time full of fun and glamour—captured our moment weirdly well. (Emphasis on the weird.) This month’s recommendations is filled with more Critic Picks than usual, so without further delay, let’s dive right in...

March + April Crowd-Pleasers

Double Feature — 2018 Action Thrillers: Bad Times at the El Royale + Den of Thieves

In Bad Times at the El Royale (Crowd: 9/10, // Critic: 8/10), Jeff Bridges, Cynthia Erivo, Jon Hamm, Chris Hemsworth, and Dakota Johnson are staying at a motel on the California-Nevada state line full of money, murder, and mystery. In Den of Thieves (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 6.5/10), Gerard Butler takes on some of the best bank robbers in the world. Whether you like your action with a dose of mystery or the thrills of plot twists, these will fit the bill.

Double Feature — ‘80s Comedies: Caddyshack (1980) + Splash (1984)

In the mood for pure silliness? Take your pick between a mermaid and a gopher! Five years before The Little Mermaid, Tom Hanks fell for Daryl Hannah’s blonde hair and scaly tail, and John Candy was his goofy brother in Splash (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10). And four years before Ghostbusters, Bill Murray was the goof on a golf course full of funny people like Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, and Ted Knight in Caddyshack (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10).

Double Feature — 1980s Coming-of-Age Films Starring Corey Feldman, Kiefer Sutherland, and Challenging Brother Relationships That Influenced Stranger Things: Stand by Me (1986) + The Lost Boys (1987)

Believe it or not, I had no idea these two ‘80s classics had so much in common when I chose to watch them back-to-back. In Rob Reiner’s adaptation of Stephen King’s Stand by Me (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9/10), four kids (Feldman, Jerry O’Connell, River Phoenix, and Wil Wheaton) are following train tracks to find a missing body. In The Lost Boys (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10), Corey Haim and Jason Patric move to a small California town and discover it’s full of ‘80s movie star cameos and…vampires? One is a thoughtful coming-of-age story and one is just bonkers, but both are a great time.

Spaceman by Nick Jonas (2021)

My love for the Jonas Brothers is well-documented, so instead of going down the rabbit hole I started digging at 15, I’ll talk about how Nick Jonas’s latest solo album will likely appeal to a wider audience than just the fans of the brothers’ bombastic pop records. It’s full of catchy tunes you’ll play on repeat and an R&B-influenced album experience about the loneliness we’ve experienced in the last year and how we try to make long-term relationships work.

Ted Lasso (2020- )

I love stories about nice people crushing cruelty and cynicism with relentless kindness, and Ted Lasso (Jason Sudeikis) is the warmest, most dedicated leader this side of Leslie Knope. Be sure to catch up on these witty and sweet 10 episodes before season 2 drops later this summer.

Double Feature — Tony Scott Action Flicks: Enemy of the State (1998) + The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009)

Tony Scott’s movies have got explosions and excitement in spades. I love a good man-on-the-run movie, and in Enemy of the State (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10), Will Smith is running through the streets of D.C. after getting evidence of a politician’s (Jon Voight) part in a murder. I also love a tense story set in a confined space, which is what Denzel Washington is dealing with in The Taking of Pelham 123 (Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 7/10) after a hammy John Travolta takes a New York subway train hostage.

Double Feature — Baseball Movies: The Natural (1984) + Trouble With the Curve (2012)

Sue me—I love baseball movies. Robert Redford plays a fictional all-time great in the early days of the MLB in The Natural (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10), and Clint Eastwood plays a fictional all-time great scout in his late career in Trouble With the Curve (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 7.5/10). If you love baseball or actors like Amy Adams, Glenn Close, Robert Duvall, and Justin Timberlake, these movies are just right here waiting for you.

Nate Bargatze: The Greatest Average American (2021)

Sue me—I enjoy Netflix standup comedy specials that are safe enough to watch with your whole family. That’s exactly the crowd I laughed with over Easter weekend, and while the trailer captures Bargatze’s relaxed vibe, it doesn’t capture how funny he really is.

The Mighty Ducks (1992)

I thought somewhere in my childhood I’d seen at least one of The Mighty Ducks movies, but after watching all three, I think my memories must’ve come from previews on the VHS tapes for other Disney movies I watched over and over again. The original still holds up as an grown-ups, which is why even my parents got sucked in to this family movie while just passing through the living room. Bonus for ‘80s movies lovers: Emilio Estevez is basically continuing Andrew Clark’s story from The Breakfast Club as an adult. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10

Double Feature — New, Dumb Action on Streaming: Godzilla vs. Kong + Thunder Force (2021)

If you want something intelligent, go ahead and skip to the next recommendation, but if you’re looking for something stupid fun, these are ready for you on HBO Max and Netflix. Thunder Force (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6/10) follows Melissa McCarthy and Octavia Spencer as they train to become superheroes who take on superhuman sociopaths wreaking havoc on Chicago, and alongside Jason Bateman, they do it with a lot of laughs. Godzilla vs. Kong (Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 5/10) is, um, exactly what it sounds like, so I’ll skip a plot summary and just say it’s exactly what you want from this kind of movie. #TeamKong

3:10 to Yuma (2007)

All you need to know is Russell Crowe is an outlaw, and Christian Bale is the guy who’s got to get him on the train to prison. I also watched the 1957 version, which is also a solid watch if you love classic Westerns. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

Falcon and the Winter Soldier (2021)

Marvel’s newest series isn’t nearly as inventive as WandaVision, and it may not land every beat, but it’s worth a watch for the fun new gadgets, Sebastian Stan’s dry joke delivery, and its exploration into themes of what makes a hero and what governments owe their citizens. It’s a pretty satisfying entry in the MCU canon, but I’d also recommend re-watching Captain America: Winter Soldier and Civil War—the canon is getting expansive, and it’s getting trickier every year to keep up with all the backstory.

March + April Critic Picks

Best of 2020 Picks

As per usual, the months leading up to the Oscars becomes a binge period for potential Oscar nominees. In March and April, I watched many of the films that made my Top 20 of 2020, including Boys State, The Father, Judas and the Black Messiah, Let Them All Talk, Minari, Nomadland, On the Rocks, One Night in Miami…, Promising Young Woman, Soul, and Sound of Metal. You can read how I ranked them on my list for ZekeFilm, plus reviews of The Father, Minari, Promising Young Woman, and Soul.

Bonus: If you loved On the Rocks, don’t miss this feature and beautiful photography starring Sofia Coppola, Kirsten Dunst, Elle Fanning, and Rashida Jones for W Magazine. 

Stranger Than Fiction (2006)

What would you do if you started hearing a voice who narrated your every thought and move? If you’re Will Ferrell, you’ll seek out a literary professor (Dustin Hoffman), fall in love (with Maggie Gyllenhaal), and track down the voice (Emma Thompson) who’s making ominous predictions about your future. Stranger Than Fiction is funny thought-provoking, and an unusual but welcome role for Ferrell. Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

All the Royal Family News

Speaking of stranger than fiction, it’s been a busy few months for the Royal Family. We’ve celebrated 95th birthday of Queen Elizabeth, the 3rd birthday of Prince Louis, and the 10th anniversary of Will and Kate’s marriage. We also lost Prince Philip, and we watched the drama of Harry and Meaghan’s interview with Oprah. No matter what happens to their Crown, I don’t think we’ll ever get over our fascination with the Windsor family. A few pieces worth reading from the last few months:

“In Meghan and Harry’s Interview, Two TV Worlds Collided,” Vulture.com

“The Queen’s Man: Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, Dies,” TIME.com

“Obituary: HRH The Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh,” BBC.com

Goodfellas (1990)

One of my film opinions that makes me feel like a phony is that Martin Scorsese just isn’t my cup of tea. He’s brilliant, but his films tend to be long and dark, two qualities that are never my first choice…and somehow Goodfellas still worked for me? Maybe it was the TV edit graciously toning down the violence or maybe it was that Ray Liotta and Joe Pesci were firing on all cylinders, but for some reason this ‘90s classic didn’t suck the joy out of my evening like Scorsese often does. (Bonus: For a Martin Scorsese/Robert De Niro I don’t really recommend, head to the last section of this Round Up.)

Fearless (Taylor’s Version) (2021)

Her voice has only matured, so Taylor Swift revisiting her old albums is like upgrading a blast to the past. Plus, the six new tracks make me feel like 15 crushing on that boy in Spanish class again, and her Grammys performance (just before her third Album of the Year win) was magical and folklore-tastic.

Double Feature — ‘60s Action Classics: The Guns of Navarone (1961) + Planet of the Apes (1968)

The Guns of Navarone (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10) follows Gregory Peck and David Niven as they destroy Nazi weapons in the Mediterranean. Planet of the Apes (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10) follows Charlton Heston as he attempts to escape from, well, a planet full of apes. The pacing of ‘60s films doesn’t always hold up, but that’s not the case with this pair. Both are still full of suspense, and you can’t go wrong hanging with casts like these.

Let Him Go (2020)

Kevin Costner and Diane Lane play a farming couple who unexpectedly help raise a boy who lost his biological father—sound familiar? But instead of a superhero origin story, they’re part of a thrilling Western with performances nuanced (Costner and Lane) and showy (Lesley Manville). If I’d watched this before completing my Best of 2020 piece, it likely would’ve been on my list. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

The Oscars

I’m a ride-or-die fan of the Academy Awards, but I’ll admit even I found this year’s ceremony odd. Instead of focusing on what wasn’t so hot, I’ll recommend a few moments you don’t want to miss:

Emerald Fennell giving a shout-out to Saved by the Bell

Daniel Kaluuya acknowledging his parents’ sex life during his acceptance speech (??)

Yuh-Jung Yoon flirting with Brad Pitt and acknowledging she’s just “luckier” than her fellow nominees

Glenn Close dancing to…”Da Butt”?

You can also read about the historic wins and nominations from this year’s Oscar class and why the Golden Globes were an even stranger production weeks earlier.

Trailer-palooza!

Movies are on their way back, y’all! I’m counting down the days until I can get back to a theatre, and even if some of these movies are duds, I’m planning to see all of them on a big screen if possible:

Those Who Wish Me Dead (May 14)

Cruella (May 28)

In the Heights (June 11)

Space Jam 2 (July 16)

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (September 3)

West Side Story (December 10)

Also in March + April…

To add to the Oscars love, you can listen to a conversation about what we learn about family, community, and society in some of the year’s biggest nominees on the Uncommon Voices podcast. I join regular hosts Michael and Kenneth in this episode, and I recommend all of their thoughtful discussions on their “What’s Streaming” episodes.

I’ve previously recommended the Do You Like Apples weekly newsletter, so I’m proud to share I contributed twice in March! I wrote about Love and Basketball, directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, and one of my all-time favorite Julia Roberts rom-coms, Notting Hill. (I also tied to win their Oscars pool, but I suppose that’s less exciting for you than me.)

It was a busy couple of months on SO IT’S A SHOW! New logo, new email list, new Instagram, and a host of new episodes about a flop of a Madonna flick, a Swedish children’s TV show, an urban legend turned into a horror movie, one of the best films about journalism ever, and a Martin Scorsese movie about a real boxer.

Most of what I wrote for ZekeFilm in March and April was mentioned in Best of 2020 recommendations…except for The Nest, a film that couldn’t figure out what genre it wanted to be.

Photo credits: Nick Jonas, Royal Family. All others IMDb.com.

#Round Up #Bad Times at the El Royale #Den of Thieves #Caddyshack #Splash #Stand by Me #The Lost Boys #Spaceman #Nick Jonas #Ted Lasso #Enemy of the State #The Taking of Pelham 123 #The Natural #Trouble With the Curve #Nate Bargtze #Nate Bargatze: The Greatest Average American #The Mighty Ducks #Godzilla vs. Kong #Thunder Force #3:10 to Yuma #Falcon and the Winter Soldier #Stranger Than Fiction #The Royal Family #Meaghan Markle #Prince Harry #Goodfellas #Fearless #taylor swift #Fearless (Taylor's Version) #The Guns of Navarone

[kilesplaysthings]

Happy Halloween! I hope you guys have a fun and safe spooky day! 

Now as a horror fan, I gotta tell you guys, I find the vampire lore in IkeVam a little weak sauce (ok, actually a LOT) lol But I do tend to like vampires as more of the monstrous villains in fiction too. So! in celebration of today kiles is gonna recommend some vampire flicks for you all that love these bloodsucking monsters. Let me know which ones you like and maybe even recommend ones that I don’t have on here! :D

Let the Right One In/Let Me In: both the original Swedish film and its American remake are very good, but I personally find the OG better in both acting and dark tones. The story is about a boy who is bullied by his peers and feels isolated from everyone, meeting what seems to be a little girl and befriends her. But there is more to this girl than meets the eye. I can’t recall there being a lot of warnings in this, but it does have some gore.

The Lost Boys: I love this movie. It’s so 80s lol But the vampire stuff is really fun. That and not only do you have a young Corey Feldman in a duo of kid vampire hunters, but you get a young Kiefer Sutherland running around with a sort of Glam Metal look going on. The story is about two brothers and their mom who move to a California town that wind up getting involved with a group of rebellious teens who turn out to be vampires.

What We Do in the Shadows: This is probably my favorite vampire movie. I love the faux-documentary of this New Zealand dark comedy, and I love the homage to traditional vampire lore. No more sparkling, no more resistance to daylight. The vampires in this movie are done right, in my opinion. I’m more of a traditionalist when in comes to monsters, you see. I almost wish we could get an ikevam version that was more like this, where MC is the person making the documentary filming the boys lol

Nosferatu: The Classic vampire flick from the Silent Era of film. It’s a German retelling of the story Dracula. Count Orlock’s design is perfectly eerie and creepy, iconic throughout media. If you don’t mind silent film and you haven’t seen this one, check it out!

Dracula: And then, of course, there’s the classic film with Bela Lugosi. His Hungarian accent became the go-to for other vampires in later media. It’s pretty close to the book for the most part. At least, it’s as good as most book adaptations that were made back then were (which wasn’t too good lol)

Fright Night: This is another very 80s movie. The main character is a teenager who is addicted to a tv show about a vampire hunter and how he hunts vampires. Because of this, he starts to become suspicious that his new, odd neighbor may in fact be a vampire. There is also a remake starring Anton Yelchin, Colin Farrell and David Tennant that’s.. ok lol

Salem’s Lot: Stephen King’s vampire tale. A man coming back to his childhood town realizes that a vampire is preying on the townsfolk. While this is an older flick that might not be exactly scary there’s some great classic vampire stuff and eerie scenes. Plus it’s Stephen King! 

30 Days of Night: Probably the most horrific vampire movie, where there is nothing redeemable or likable about the vampires whatsoever. The setting of this movie alone makes it terrifying. Set in a northern, remote part of Alaska, an isolated town is beset by ravenous vampires when the town is submerged in complete darkness for one month. Most of the town’s occupants go south for the winter, but those remaining have to fight and use quick thinking to survive. Warning to those who don’t like gore for this one. It’s pretty brutal.

Afflicted: A found footage film about two friends who are backpacking through Europe due to one guy wanting to live life to the fullest before he dies of cancer. Something goes wrong at a party however, and he soon begins to show signs of something... inhuman.

Van Helsing: I know a lot of people don’t think this movie is any good, but I admit I like it as a sort of guilty pleasure. Van Helsing is now a younger vampire hunter that’s sent by the church to help a town in Romania that is beset by Dracula and his brides. It’s got lots of funs stuff like a vampire masquerade ball, a sort of Frankenstein’s monster character, and a fight between a vampire and a werewolf that’s pretty beast :D

Bram Stoker’s Dracula: Though I haven’t seen this yet, the tone, acting, music and cinematography of this movie all look so darkly beautiful. Add a bit of gothic romance, this adaptation of Bram Stoker’s tale is one that I definitely plan to watch soon. 

Thirst: A Korean take on a vampiric story. A priest who wishes to save lives volunteers to be a guinea pig for a vaccine that is being made to cure a virus. But things go awry and he comes back to life as a vampire. Now he has to battle between his thirst and his faith. Haven’t seen this either, but I plan to! Korean films are always a cut above, and if you don’t mind some gore and adult elements, I’m sure you’ll enjoy this.

Others I would recommend: 

Interview with a Vampire, though I don’t really like that movie all that much. You do get a younger Tom Cruise as a vampire though lol plus Kirsten Dunst’s character is surprisingly sympathetic and sad (at least to me!)

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night: This one’s unique, being an Iranian take on vampires. It’s a slower indie film, about a mysterious girl who only comes out at night and skateboards around a town. I wasn’t too crazy about this one, but it was interesting!

Shiki: I’ve seen three-ish vampire anime. This, Diabolik Lovers, and Vampire Knight. I didn’t like DL at ALL, and I could barely get through the first few episodes of VK. Shiki is excellent, though, if you can get past the odd character designs. I probably would have liked VK better if the story was focused solely on Zero’s character though. 

Vampyr.  This is an RPG actually, but the vampire lore is so dark, bloody and complex. The MC is a doctor that specializes in blood transfusions who comes back to London from WW1 right during the Spanish Flu epidemic. When he’s turned into a vampire by a mysterious sire, he has to find a way to survive while still acting as a doctor and decide if he will kill others or starve.

#ikemen vampire #ikevam #ikevamp #vampires #halloween #vampire films #halloween recommendations

[aion-rsa]

Why Jack Bauer Is America’s James Bond

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Despite what Marvel might have you believe, not all film franchises are perfectly serialized.

Take, for example, another kind of cinematic superhero: James Bond a.k.a. 007. The MI6 spy created by Ian Fleming and brought to screen by Harry Saltzman and Albert R. Broccoli is timeless in the most literal sense of the world. Since Sean Connery passed the role of James Bond to Roger Moore for good in 1973’s Live and Let Die (Connery previously gave way to George Lazenby in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service before returning in Diamonds Are Forever), James Bond has become unstuck in time. 

As played in subsequent films over several decades by actors like Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig, Bond remains the same while the world around him changes. Some fans like to theorize that “Agent 007” and “James Bond” are aliases used by different MI6 spies throughout the years. But within the context of the series, there is only one Bond…James Bond. Bond is always middle-aged, looks good in a tux, enjoys stiff drinks and beautiful women. 

Read more

Movies

James Bond Movies Streaming Guide: Where to Watch 007 Online

By Don Kaye

The Cold War ended in the ‘90s and yet Bond, perhap the ultimate cinematic representative of its aesthetic, just kept calm and carried on as usual. Save for a handful of Craig’s latter year depictions, James Bond rarely learns any new tricks. He doesn’t develop. He is what he is – a hero of espionage and action. In that regard, the James Bond series is a surprisingly honest exploration of the occasional propagandistic aims of major blockbuster filmmaking. Bond isn’t a character in a story. He’s the United Kingdom’s idealized version of itself writ large on a canvas widescreen: a suave spy who is welcomed into every country to get laid and save the world. 

But what about the United States’ idealized version of itself? How has the Cold War’s lone surviving superpower let itself go without a similarly iconic (and occasionally nakedly jingoistic) cinematic creation? The answer is that America already does have an outsized action icon…he was just on television. 

Jack Bauer of early 2000s Fox thriller series 24 is American James Bond whether we want him to be or not. Just as Bond is the idealized Englishman, with his martini lunches and quick wit, Bauer is the America’s warped ideal of itself: angry, merciless, focused, and unfailingly effective. 

As portrayed by Kiefer Sutherland (who won an Emmy for the role), Jack Bauer started off as a fairly three-dimensional character in 24’s first season. That season picked up with Jack as a family man and a glorified pencil pusher at the fictional Counter Terrorist Unit’s Los Angeles office. Over the span of the first season’s 24 hours (24’s hook, of course, is that each season takes place over the span of a 24-hour day in real time), Jack slowly lost grip of his humanity, culminating with his friend Nina Myers turning out to be a mole and murdering his wife Teri. 

The death of Teri fundamentally changed Jack. For eight subsequent seasons and a movie, Jack became an Uncle Sam-style cartoon character obsessed with protecting his country from terrorists all over the globe, because his family was already taken away from him. Elisha Cuthbert as Jack’s daughter Kim was a prominent character for a few seasons, but as she was phased out so too was Jack’s grip on reality.

Unlike the James Bond series, 24 was particularly devoted to its chronology, with the very premise of the show meaning it had to have a close relationship with time. Jack Bauer would in theory grow as a character from season to season. But rather than developing, he mostly devolved into the most base version of himself. 

It’s in this way that Bauer actually became more like James Bond than one might initially expect. Regardless of who is playing him or what time period a particular film is set in, Bond’s characteristics remain static. By the end of 24’s run in 2014, Jack was similarly a Bond-ian relic of the past. Though the country was still feeling the effects of it, “The War on Terror” seemed as dramatically quaint for 24 as the Cold War did for James Bond. And yet here was this rugged American in the miniseries 24: Live Another Day, gripping the life out of a pistol and barking at perceived London terrorists in a gravely timber like a psycho.

24: Live Another Day was the last appearance for Jack Bauer and rightfully so at the time. The character had become a bit too anachronistic and his show, quite frankly, was frequently xenophobic. Still, as the continued success of Craig’s Bond films indicate (with No Time to Die finally set to arrive this October) perhaps there is still room for walking anachronisms in the entertainment world, as long as they’re approached correctly.

Fox has repeatedly attempted to rejuvenate the 24 brand. In 2017, the network greenlit a spinoff starring Corey Hawkins called 24: Legacy. Like its forefather, 24: Legacy, utilized a real-time format, only condensing 24 hours into 12 episodes like Live Another Day did. The spinoff was not successful and was quickly canceled following the conclusion of its first season.

Ultimately, Fox (now owned by Disney) hasn’t made any subsequent reboot attempts work yet because it has misidentified the appeal of 24 as a franchise. While the ticking clock aspect of telling a story in real time is novel and interesting, it wasn’t the reason the original series lasted for nine seasons. The real reason for 24’s success was Jack Bauer. Viewers are typically attracted to characters, not concepts. In Jack Bauer, many an American viewer likely found the embodiment of a paranoid nation they recognized.

There’s an undercurrent of anger and indignance in the American psyche. Exactly why is a question best left for sociologists. Perhaps it’s misplaced guilt over displacing a society to create a new one, or maybe it’s just the disappointment of being promised a Manifest Destiny and getting Wyoming. But whatever the reason, Jack Bauer is as apt a cartoonish American avatar as James Bond is a British one.

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So why then doesn’t 20th Television (again, now owned by Disney) just formalize the comparison and make Jack Bauer literally American James Bond? Just as Connery once handed off the baton to Lazenby and Moore, have Sutherland hand the role off to someone else. That actor would preferably represent the American physicality that Sutherland brought to the role (despite Sutherland being a Canadian, which is somewhat fitting given that the Scottish Connery was the first to play Her Majesty’s favorite spy). The new Jack Bauer would be played by someone who is short, stubbly, and angry rather than Bond’s tall, dark, and handsome. Throw the new Jack back into the field in a modern day ticking time bomb plot without bothering to explain why he is still middle-aged after 20 years. 

The answer to why Disney wouldn’t want to do such a thing is almost certainly all that aforementioned racism and torture. That is admittedly a, uh…roadblock. It really can’t be overstated just how xenophoci 24 was at times and how cruel it could be to characters and actors of Middle Eastern descent. Jack Bauer’s reliance on torture wasn’t just a dramatic crutch, 24 co-creator Joel Surnow genuinely believed in the value of torture as a foreign policy tactic. 

Suffice it to say, the series has not aged well. Then again, however, neither have many of the earlier Bond films. To a certain extent that’s the point of the Bond franchise. It understands that making movies is making myths. James Bond is every bit the mythical figure that Captain America or Iron Man are. The fact that Bond is so obviously an exaggerated character now has helped soften some of his more problematic edges. 

Bauer, on the other hand, comes from an era where Americans were both terrified of the looming threat of terrorism and were starting to invest in television as a more “serious” art form. As such, not everyone of the time was prepared to accept Jack Bauer as American James Bond, that is to say a cheesy cultural figure, not a vital supersoldier of freedom. 

In The Atlantic’s 2007 article “Whatever It Takes” about the politics of 24,  U.S. Army Brigadier General Patrick Finnegan, the dean of the United States Military Academy at West Point, recounts Jack Bauer’s effect on enlistees.

“The kids see it, and say, ‘If torture is wrong, what about 24?’ The disturbing thing is that although torture may cause Jack Bauer some angst, it is always the patriotic thing to do.”

The world has changed since then, obviously. But even now, it feels like it hasn’t fully set in that Jack Bauer is the American James Bond and should be treated with the same amount of reverence, which is none at all. Perhaps the only responsible move left is, in fact, to continue the increasingly ridiculous stories of the character with new actors.

In the right hands, Jack Bauer could be put to use as a blockbuster magnet and an appropriate critique of American foreign policy. In the end, icons don’t matter so much as what you do with them. 

The post Why Jack Bauer Is America’s James Bond appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3uwxPed

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

[liquidthedefunctblog]

Hal and Dave play The Twin Snakes: Part 1

A fan fiction in which a nerdy scientist and a gruff soldier play a game they never agreed to star in.

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Snake sat on the edge of the bed smoking a cigarette. In their pursuit of a new model of Metal Gear, he and Otacon had found themselves staying in a run down hotel room. It was unclean and cramped, but it served its purpose as a cheap place to stay. They had several days to wait until the opportune time to make their move, so Hal had gone out to stock up on any basic supplies they may require: food, water, a pack of Moslems (Snake was adamant that you never knew when a cigarette may come in handy during a mission, though Hal knew this was an obvious cover up for his addiction). He had left about an hour ago, making his return almost imminent. The pair had been travelling together attempting to rid the world of Metal Gears for about a year now, so Snake had grown used to his habits.

About five minutes later the door opened up. A thin man wearing a white jacket and a blue turtleneck stumbled in, attempting to juggle three paper bags while turning the door handle. Snake remained sat down, and removed the cigarette from his mouth before speaking in a dry tone.

"You know you could have knocked."

Hal ignored him, less to be disrespectful and more because he was currently occupied, and waddled over to the other bed. He dropped the bags onto it and began going through the supplies.

"Canned food, bottled water, nicotine patches, a can ope-"

"Nicotine patches?" Snake interrupted.

Otacon held up the box of patches and responded in an unusually stern tone, "Yup. If you don't want to help yourself Snake, then I'm going to help you."

"Hrmmph," Snake grumbled and put the cigarette back in his mouth.

Suddenly, Hal perked up with excitement, "Oh Snake, I bought something else too."

He began rummaging through the bags before pulling out a black plastic case. Hal threw it over to Snake who began analysing it. It seemed to show him and... Liquid. Snake scowled at the thought of his clone brother. He looked at the top of the case.

"Metal...Gear?" Snake proceeded to look at the subtitle.

"The Twin Snakes?" Snake continued, as confused as before.

He looked down at the bottom of the case, "Produced by... Hideo Kojima? I've heard that name before... wasn't he a spy under the command of Big Boss?"

Hal heaved his suitcase onto the bed before letting out an exhausted breath. Once he recovered he shot Snake an exasperated glare.

"What are you talking about Snake? Mr Kojima is one of the most respected game developers in the world. Anyway, I hear he didn't have too much to do with this one."

"Well, a person can have two jobs," Snake muttered.

"So, this is one of those video game things huh? Using the most terrible weapon ever built to make a quick buck... sounds like this Mr Kojima is just as bad as the suits who put Metal Gear into production."

Otacon lifted his head out of the suitcase, looking personally offended by Snake's comments.

"No, you've got it all wrong Snake. I hear the game's story does a great job of showing the evils of nuclear weaponry. Mr Kojima wrote it himself!"

Hal nodded, as though this fact somehow verified everything he had said, before going back to rummaging through the suitcase.

Snake turned over the case.

"Alaskan military installation... why am I getting the feeling I've heard this somewhere before?"

Hal pulled some wires out of the suitcase before looking over at Snake, his hand awkwardly rubbing his neck.

"They uh, well Snake you see they... they made the game about Shadow Moses."

"What!?" Snake looked over at the awkward scientist, what remained of his cigarette falling to the ground. He proceeded to stamp on it with his boot, both to put it out and to release his anger.

"Do they have any respect? What happened there shouldn't be trivialised in a children's toy."

Otacon, again looking wounded by his partner's words, made vague gestures with his hands while attempting to justify the game's existence.

"I'm sure they understood the graveness of the situation Snake. Think of it... think of it like a historical movie."

Snake mumbled, "You're not giving this thing a good image here Otacon," as he thought back to when Hal had deceived him into watching Titanic under the pretence that it was an accurate historical account.

"Well anyway, we might as well give it a try. It's not like we have much else to do for the the next few days," Hal said as he triumphantly lifted a strange black cube with a handle from the suitcase.

Snake grumbled once more before looking over at the cube, which Hal was attempting to connect to the room's small television with the wires he had pulled out earlier.

"Are we going to play this thing on your lunchbox there Otacon?"

Hal, who despite his great feats of engineering seemed to be having trouble working out which wire went where, responded without even looking up.

"This is a Nintendo Gamecube Snake. It's the latest system from a beloved game developer, though I hear they're working on an even more powerful one, and it's what we're gonna play the game on. You can see the logo on the top of the case."

Snake turned the case back over, and sure enough there was a logo sitting right there.

"These the ones who made that 2600 thing?" the soldier questioned.

Hal sighed, plugging in the final wire before turning around, "That was Atari, Snake. You really need to get with the times, this stuff is common knowledge. Anyway, the system's ready." He turned on the television and sat in the room's lone chair.

Snake groaned at his ally's definition of common knowledge before walking over to where he was sat and looming over his chair.

The two stared at the screen as various logos popped up. Eventually the logo of the game itself appeared, with several snakes coiled as though to resemble two strands of DNA in the background. Hal turned around from his chair, and gave his partner a serious glare.

"Well Snake, this is it. Are you ready?"

Snake internally chuckled at the scientist's intense tone, but remained stoic on the outside. He gave a small nod.

"Okay then, I'll get it started."

Otacon moved through some menus, before eventually reaching one labelled "Difficulty". Snake watched as he immediately moved down to the option labelled "Extreme". He didn't know much about these "video games", but he assumed that to be the most challenging option available.

"Extreme? Doesn't that seem a little overboard?"

Hal emitted a noise halfway between a sigh and a chuckle, his face remaining glued to the screen.

"Oh Snake, you really don't know anything about games do you? Don't worry, they make these things way too easy these days. You gotta go as high as possible if you want to have any sort of challenge."

Dave made a low "Hrmph" sound under his breath, before Hal jumped up slightly, sounding excited once again.

"It's starting!"

That Kojima fellow's name appeared on screen once again, before the screen began to display what Snake presumed to be a submarine in the ocean. This was all but confirmed when the words "Alaska-Bering Sea" appeared. A submarine and a straight path, maybe this modern stuff wasn't too different from the simple games he had seen installed at bars in the past. Snake bent down and began fiddling with Hal's controller.

"So, we're the submarine huh?" he said as he moved the control stick left and right, a sense of pride in his words.

Otacon tried desperately to push Dave aside, sounding annoyed with his lack of knowledge.

"This is a cutscene Snake! They tell the game's story! Haven't you ever played a video game before?"

Snake moved away, visibly shocked, "Cutscene? This isn't sounding much like Space Invaders..."

Hal recovered from Snake's attempt to grab the controller, and turned to face him again.

"You know Space Invaders huh Snake?" he said before turning back around and muttering to himself, "Well that's something I guess..."

Snake smirked, looking incredibly pleased with himself, "Number 8 at the local bar back in Alaska."

Otacon kept his eyes on the screen, unimpressed with Snake's achievement.

"And how many people are playing Space Invaders in the middle of Alaska?"

"Well the leaderboard only ever hit nine people," he muttered awkwardly. Trying to change the subject he looked up at the screen on which he saw a man with demonic looking black eyes wearing a beret. Two names flashed up next to him,

"Roy Campbell (Paul Eiding)"

"That's the Colonel! ...What happened to his eyes?"

"C'mon Snake, don't be so harsh. These graphics are the best they can do."

Snake prayed his old friend would never have to see this

"What's the insertion method?"

Hal, who was fiddling with the controller, looked back at his partner, "Huh Snake?"

Snake raised an eyebrow and shook his head, before pointing at the television with his folded arm. Right after he did so, another pair of names flashed up.

"Solid Snake (David Hayter)"

Snake almost did a double take as he saw this, "That voice was... me?! It was awful!"

Hal made a cautious noise of disagreement, "Actually Snake, I think he's got you down pat."

Snake grew slightly red in the face, while the gravel in his voice became even more apparent, "Well that's not what I hear!"

"You're a chain smoking clone of a chain smoking soldier Snake, what were you expecting?"

Snake thought for a moment, "Who's the guy in that 24 show? He sounds pretty good."

Hal gave a wry smile, "Kiefer Sutherland? In your dreams Snake."

Snake looked down at the ground in embarrassment, "Just watch the damned game."

The "cutscene" ended with Snake's rise from the water at the Shadow Moses Dock. Otacon placed the controller down on the table, and stood up from the chair.

"You know what Snake, I want you to try this."

Snake let out a short, sharp grunt

"C'mon, it'll be fun. It can't hurt to try."

"Hrmph, fine."

Snake sat down in the chair and picked up the controller, "How the hell do I use this thing?"

"Don't worry, the game tells you what to do."

As if on cue, the iconic sound of the codec blared from the television while portraits of Snake and Campbell appeared on screen.

"Hmph, is this some kind of puzzle?"

Snake fiddled with some buttons on the controller, eventually skipping the Colonel's guidance entirely.

"Or... not," Hal mumbled as his shoulders sagged.

Meanwhile, Snake returned to his prior task of attempting to get the 3D model of himself to move, spinning the control stick in confusion. Eventually through sheer luck he managed to not only reach a crawling position, but make his way under the pipe. He proceed to move forward, however he stopped in his tracks when a loud noise was emitted.

"!"

Suddenly the word "Alert" had appeared in the corner of the screen, and some dramatic music had begun playing.

"Otacon, what the hell is going on."

"You've started an alert phase Snake! You don't have the means to fight the guards right now, so try and hide!" Hal responded as he bounced up and down nervously.

"Hide? What if I head back to the pipe?"

Snake ran back where he came from, the guards hot in pursuit.

Hal looked down at him from behind, almost screaming into his ears.

"Snake? What are you doing? Snake? Snaaakee?"

Snake moved away from his partner's yelling, grunting as he did so, "Calm down Otacon. What if I-" Snake was cut off by a loud guttural scream as his digital self fell to the ground, blood spilling everywhere. Some new words appeared on the screen.

"Game Over"

"..."

"..."

"Give me the controller Snake."

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Part 2 comes when I can be arsed to put effort in.

#mgs #otasune #metal gear #fanfic #twin snakes #solid snake #otacon