#ive talked about this girl before in the tags so if u keep up with my vents thank u lol
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HAPPINESS — yu jimin x f!reader
jimin made you feel like life was worth living for.
TAGS — situationship, strangers to lovers, ive member!yn, jealousy, angst, fluff, birthday fic for jimin
WORDCOUNT — 3.8k
it hadn’t been long since you and karina met. by luck, she was attending a fashion show and had gravitated to you during the after-party. it was an unforgettable experience; one of the most gorgeous idols constantly hovering around you, eyes lingering on the silky black, backless dress you adorned, fingers dancing across your arms… needless to say, you had immediately asked for her contact information, only to receive a cryptic smile in return.
“why not just,” she whispered, “come back to my place instead?”
you had instantly declined, “i’m sorry, i don’t do that. and don’t you live with your members anyway?” karina merely shrugged, eyes twinkling with a gleam you couldn’t name.
“then shouldn’t we go back to yours?”
exasperated, you shake your head, “i just said, i don’t do that. i was interested before, and you are jaw-droppingly beautiful, but i’m not intending to go anywhere tonight, karina.”
the girl hesitated for a few seconds. you raised an eyebrow. she grins, “call me jimin.”
it had only been a month since that interaction. since then, your relationship has progressed. from strangers to friends and now tethering on the edge of a relationship. or as your member yujin had described, a ‘situationship’. it was so easy to open up to jimin, her sweet talk, midnight chats and relentless insistence to annoy you had captured your attention. she was so stupidly cute.
you had fallen.
and jimin seemed to have as well.
no one would stay up till midnight talking to a situationship unless they really liked them, right?
and even though jimin had a schedule the next day, you and her were still in a heated discussion about which ice cream flavour was the superior one (it was always vanilla).
the alarm on your phone rang. in bright words read, ‘milan fashion show.’ you smile to yourself. it was another chance to see jimin after her hectic schedule. you barely had time to see her during her break, and now your schedules finally matched up. you couldn’t wait to see her.
jiminie [7.41am]:
hihihi good morning
i’ll see u ltr :))
ynie [8.20am]:
morning!
can’t wait.
you turn your phone off with a bright grin, barely keeping your excitement under wraps. your flight was at 10 and by the time you reached milan, it would be around 11 in the evening. it was going to be a long flight, but the thought of seeing jimin again made your stomach tighten up. was this what people in relationships feel? it was so bizarre that the simple thought of someone could so easily make you feel breathless.
unable to contain your exhilaration, you get some weird stares from your manager and assistants. meekly apologising, you close your eyes as they drive to the airport, dreaming of a certain main dancer.
you blink. how did you get here?
jimin, was just standing a few feet away from you, but she had barely spared you a glance the whole day. she didn’t even greet you or anything. even after the crew had asked for you two to stand together, jimin was at least a metre away, not daring to stand in your vicinity. you could cry.
especially with the heart eyes every other person was sending her way. you swallow the lump in your throat, staring at the man who stood a little close for comfort next to her. and throughout the show, you could only stare longingly at the back of her head, sighing every once in a while when the two of them would pose. it was devastating.
“you good?” one of the other attendants asked. you think you recognise them from a recent drama you’ve watched.
“yeah,” you mumble, taking a sip of the champagne in your glass. at the corner of your eye, you could see jimin and that man conversing, both sharing giggles and whispers. your grip on the glass tightens. groaning, you look away, trying to hide the hurt on your face from being ignored so obviously. all your attempts at conversation had been shut down and she brushed past all your waves.
you saunter to the corner, taking a seat and pulling out your phone.
yujin [9.27pm]:
how’s it gg
yn [10.14pm]:
it’s like i don’t even exist.
i don’t know what i should do
she keeps talking to some guy
yujin [10.15pm]:
girl gtfo
you agree with yujin. if karina wanted to ignore you, so be it. there was nothing for you to do anyway. after sending a quick message to your manager, you get back up, heading back to the group of actors and idols alike that were engaged in conversation.
coincidentally, karina and her partner for the night had joined as well. it wasn’t difficult to avoid eye contact when she wouldn’t even look in your direction.
“i’ve requested for more champagne,” one of them say, “anybody wants a refill?”
a murmur of chorus emerges.
the waiter stares at your glass expectantly, the bottle in his hand waiting.
“ah… no, i’m leaving soon,” you say awkwardly, handing your glass to another waiter passing by. karina’s head shoots up.
“shame,” they all agree.
“your manager’s picking you up?” karina finally speaks. you longed for her voice, but you’re not very appreciative of it now.
you nod, barely wanting to start a conversation with the girl.
“i’ll walk you out.”
can you really refuse in front of all these people? you already had a reputation of being a bitch. refusing karina’s offer was going to severely damage your image.
you just hold your tongue.
the cold air greets you warmly, unlike karina. you relish in the gusts of wind, waiting patiently outside the gala for your manager’s distinguishable car. karina hums a gentle tune, turning to you.
“how was the show?”
“good,” you reply, curt.
karina doesn’t back down.
“you had fun?” you nod.
“i didn’t get to talk to you at all, it’s sad you’re leaving now.”
you shrug.
“why are you leaving so early?”
“tired.”
“hm, okay.”
you stand in silence while karina fidgets beside you, her hands constantly twirling her hair and eyes darting around. cursing yourself, you take a quick glance at her. the girl’s deep, lush and dark hair flows charmingly in the wind. her eyes draw you in, hypnotising you deeply, full of uncertainty and hesitance for the first time you’ve met her.
“do you have something to say?” you ask. karina huffs, blowing her bangs covering her eyes.
“i do, but it just depends if you’ll listen to me.”
“depends on what you’re asking for,” you reply.
karina smiles, smaller than before, “stay. just for a few more minutes. with me.”
you contemplate. just for a few minutes.
“only until my manager comes.”
she falters, it’s the first time you’ve ever subtly rejected her company, but a practised mask of indifference is put on.
there’s an uncomfortable silence, one that neither of you are willing to acknowledge. you start to regret your decision; you should have just asked her to go back in, instead of waiting out here with you like a fool.
“minjeong’s been talking about this milan cathedral, called duomo di milano, it’s really pretty,” karina looks at you expectantly, “do you have the day off tomorrow for sightseeing?”
you answer slowly, “i do have the day off...”
“where are you staying? i’ll come pick you up.”
“but i don’t want to go, karina,” you complete your sentence. shock passes her face rather quickly.
“uhm, do you want to go somewhere else?”
you shake your head, wanting her to get the hint that you weren’t exactly jumping for the opportunity to hang out.
“we could go shopping at this galleria that aeri mentioned, it has a hotel and everything.”
“no, thanks for offering.”
karina’s tethering on the edge of distress, her face showing visible distraught by now, no longer caring to hide behind a mask of impassiveness. you check your phone again. notifications line your lock screen, most of them coming from yujin.
yujin [10.29pm]:
are u out of there yet
make sure to get back safe
also call me ltr i need to tell u smth
omg jiwon js told me she left seo at home alone
you smile at yujin messages. the leader’s caring nature makes your heart warm and the mention of your other members makes you miss them.
“your manager texting you?” karina asks.
“uh, no,” you reply vaguely, not very keen on talking to her. karina frowns.
“are you sick? do you feel unwell?” she lifts a hand up to touch your neck. the fleeting touch of her fingers already caused goosebumps against your skin.
“i’m fine, karina.”
the mention of her name makes her glare at you, “didn’t i say to call me jimin?”
unable to answer coherently, you settle for silence. karina huffs, seemingly getting irritated.
she opens her mouth once again, but the honk of a car distracts you. the window rolls down and you recognise your manager.
“thanks for uhm, staying here with me,” you bow, “have a good night.” you were upset, but that wouldn’t stop you from being polite.
karina merely watches you leave.
your manager gives you about five minutes of peace and tranquillity before unleashing an onslaught of questions onto you, like “why’d you leave?” or “did someone say something to you?” you answer truthfully to most of his questions.
unable to get a proper response, he just drives back and tells you to not get into any trouble on your day-off.
(“what trouble would i even get into?”
“i’ll actually quit if dispatch posts a photo of you drinking with your friends.”
“that would be impossible since i don’t have any friends.”)
meanwhile, yujin fills you in on the stupid shit your members get up to during your absence. like rei putting aluminium into the microwave and wonyoung just managing to stop her in time.
your phone lights up with notifications throughout the night and you hate the fact that it doesn’t bring you the same excitement like before. the morning after, a chain of messages graces your phone.
jiminie [9.17am]:
are u awake?
jiminie [9.20am]:
when are u gg back to korea?
hello?
ynie [9.31am]:
tmrw
jiminie [9.31am]:
do u feel like gg out tdy?
you turn off your phone, sighing. you would have felt bad for being so distant but the mere thought of karina with that guy yesterday night made you feel unneeded. why was she texting you and asking to hang out with you when she already had someone to go to?
there was no point overthinking about her.
karina would just be another failed situationship. she didn’t mean that much to you (she did). she wasn’t the first thing you thought of once you woke up (she was). and she definitely couldn’t be a good girlfriend for you (she definitely could be).
the hotel doorbell rings. you quirk an eyebrow, not remembering ever ordering room service. maybe your manager knew you wouldn’t be going out for breakfast.
you don’t bother checking the peephole, the hotel you were staying at was very tight on security and only celebrities stayed at this floor. you open the door, stomach grumbling at the thought of food.
“yn.”
oh.
karina stands at your door, a small smile on her face. you feel terribly underdressed compared to her in your bathrobe and messy bed hair.
“good morning,” you greet hoarsely.
“hurry up and get dressed.”
you stop karina from entering your room.
“what are you talking about?”
“we’re going out whether you like it or not. you shouldn’t rot in your room, you should be exploring milan, before you leave, with me.”
do you really have a choice to say no? (yes, you do).
in your heart, you knew in the end, you wouldn’t ever say no to karina.
“okay.”
she grins and you forget why you were even upset in the first place.
karina waits patiently while you finish getting ready. she’s on the balcony admiring the view when you’re done.
“where are we going?” you grab a mask and a cap as karina puts on her shoes again.
“it’s a surprise, and you don’t need those,” karina answers, pointing at the items in your hand. you frown.
“people will recognise me. they’ll see me with you.”
karina shakes her head, “it’s fine, i don’t mind it.”
i mind it though.
you end up leaving them by your bedside table.
“where are we going?” you repeat as karina drags you out of the door. she groans, “stop asking! i already told you it’s a surprise.”
“i need to tell my manager.”
karina pouts, “i’ve already contacted him, just stop worrying about everything.”
her words seem so easy to believe now. to stop worrying about everything.
the streets of milan are filled with cafes and luxury brands. with it being one of the most visited cities, tourists and locals alike roam the area. at every corner, there’s either an art gallery or museum. you must admit that the architecture is simply amazing. quaint bookstores and coffee shops provide a sense of peace away from the bustling metropolitan city. milan was beautiful.
karina pulls you into a cafe, the strong aroma of coffee already filling your senses. there’s a quiet ambience of chatter and the soft footsteps of the waiters walking around. the girl brings you to one of the tables near the window. it gives you a view of a clothing shop adjacent to the cafe, full of customers.
“milan’s called a fashion capital,” karina remarks, “it’s one of europe’s most dynamic cities.” when you don’t reply, karina stands up, awkwardly saying, “i’ll go order our food.”
you nod.
she comes back soon, red in the face and fumbling with her wallet.
you ignore it.
“uhm, anyway, did you sleep well last night?”
“yeah.”
“okay… uh, what time is your flight tomorrow?”
“i think it’s in the morning,” you feel pity for karina who’s been desperately trying to keep the conversation going, “what about you?”
karina’s face lights up, “it’s at one in the afternoon.”
the waiter soon arrives with your food. its mouth-watering. karina hands the waiter a note and says something in italian that you don’t understand.
“you can speak italian?” you ask, curiosity taking over you.
“yeah, a little,” karina mumbles. she doesn’t seem to want to elaborate, so you don’t bother asking any more. you gorge yourself out with the pastries that karina ordered, all while she looks a little constipated and unsure.
“you’re not going to eat?”
“i… i already ate before coming here.”
you nod, continuing to chew.
“it’s so early, who’s awake to even eat with?”
karina mutters, “i ate with jaewook.” you swallow the piece of bread in your mouth. the sweetness you tasted on your tongue is gone, just left with a bitter taste. you regret even asking her. you regret coming out of your hotel to eat pastries with her at 9 in the morning.
your head feels clouded. it’s not only gravity pulling you down. it’s a wrangling chain clutching your heart, pulling it into your stomach. the more you think about karina and that guy together, the more you feel like puking out all the sweet treats you stuffed your mouth with. you wanted to get rid of anything related to her.
“are you okay?” she asks.
no, you want to reply.
“i wanna go back,” you say instead.
lying was always better than telling her the truth.
“what? no, uhm,” karina blurts out, panicked, “you can’t go back yet, we still have a lot to sightsee.”
“please let me go back,” you beg, feeling a wave of nausea take over. between her incessant pleading to not leave and the vision of the two of them, jealousy fills your every vein.
“i planned a lot for today and oh my god, yn—” you can’t stand it anymore.
swiftly, you take out a wad of cash, placing it on the table and leaving the cafe without a second look behind. you stomp out quick, steady steps back to the hotel and you can feel karina hot on your heels. she calls out for your name, but to no avail do you turn back. you think of a plan. once you get back to your room, you’re going to block karina on everything. she’s never going to exist in your life ever again. if your job requires you to interact with her, it’s a bare minimum. you’ll break off contact with all of your mutual friends, ryujin, minjeong, maybe chaewon (but yujin and wonyoung would kill you).
it’s only when you reach a traffic light that karina catches up with you. once it flashes red, you groan. you can basically see karina’s triumphant smirk at the corner of your eye.
“are you done running now?”
you take a good look at karina. she’s panting, not more than you are, and her cheeks are flushed red.
the light flashes green.
“no.”
and the chase begins again.
karina tails you until you reach the hotel lobby. you open up your purse, searching for the keycard. karina is just a few steps behind.
you hear gasps of recognition behind you, the very reason you wanted to cover up your identity.
the moment the lift reaches the ground floor, you slide in, rapidly pressing the close button. karina, however, navigates through the crowd and manages to reach the lift in time.
you groan, your attempt at running away has failed. maybe you could still convince karina to leave you alone somehow. she wouldn’t try to break into your room, right?
“this is awkward now.”
“yeah, i wasn’t expecting you to follow me,” you sneer, “if a woman says she wants to leave, just let her leave for god’s sake.”
“okay, that’s my fault but you literally left out of nowhere, and you’ve been acting weird ever since last night,” karina argues back.
the lift beeps. you exit it with karina following you closely behind, still ongoing about your sudden change in behaviour.
“like last night, you left early and we didn’t even have time to talk or anything, and when i asked you about it you didn’t even explain anything?! just brushed me off and left! can you just tell me what’s going on?”
you two reach your room.
“i don’t need to explain myself to you. i said i was tired.”
“okay, but what about today? i planned the whole day for us to hang out and you just got up and left? what the hell! are you just an asshole who plays with people’s feelings? you told me you ‘can’t wait to see me’ and then just left like that,” karina raises her voice. a elderly couple passes you two and you feel self-conscious. you were just standing outside your room letting karina yell at you.
“come in then yell, you’re getting weird looks.”
karina inhales sharply, finally calming down.
you sit down on one of the lounge chairs, taking a deep breath.
“i really don’t have anything to explain to you. i’m sorry. and i’m not the one playing with people’s feelings here.”
“what? are you insinuating that i’m the one playing with your feelings?”
“uh, if the shoe fits?”
karina slaps your arm, “are you serious right now? can you just talk to me for once?! is this your first time being friends with someone?” friends? since when were you ever just friends with karina?
“no, it isn’t,” you swallow, “it’s my first time feeling this way for someone.”
“what?”
“do you know how many times i think about you in a day? it’s once, because i never stop. it hurts me every time i see you with someone else and i know i shouldn’t feel this way because while you reside in my mind, i have to hope that I cross yours once in a while to feel less pathetic of myself. do you know how that feels? to want to exist in someone’s thoughts. i feel happy just to know that you’re even acknowledging my presence. but you didn’t. you didn’t even care when i was there, so you shouldn’t care when i’m not,” the weight of unshed tears came pouring out. you let out a watery but hollow laugh. karina makes your heart ache, she makes you feel defeated and useless, she makes you feel angry and jealous.
“you make me feel that life is worth living for. that i went through all those torturous years just to meet you.”
karina, is life in itself.
“and i don’t think i’ll ever be able to find someone else that makes me feel this way. have you ever felt that way about someone?”
she stares at you, unblinking. she comes to terms with your words finally.
“i’m sorry,” she says.
“it’s fine,” you sniffle, wiping your tears.
“i’m sorry i hurt you.”
“of course you’ll hurt me. of course we’ll hurt each other, because this is the condition of living. and what’s not love, if not living for each other?”
“i didn’t know you felt that way about me.”
you sigh, “regret is a stupid thing. when you reject me, i would be better off knowing that we wouldn’t work out because you don’t like me, rather than me not telling you and wondering if we would ever work out. and you’re with that guy anyway.”
“who told you i would reject you? and who said i was with him?”
“oh.”
“i feel everything that you’ve just said, about you. and i’m upset that you were planning to just throw me away like that because of our inability to communicate.”
you laugh, more heartily this time, “i just didn’t want to be one of your conquests or whatever.”
“you’re more than one of my conquests. i wouldn’t dream of even letting you go. some people search their whole lives to find what i found in you. you can be assured that i won’t ever let you go.”
her sincere words draw red to your cheeks, warmth spreads from your neck to the tip of your ears. “you still like me,” you repeat, “even when i’m a jealous freak, have commitment issues and i care too much?”
“even with all those traits. if you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be the yn i like,” karina’s voice softens as does her touch. she takes your hand in hers, caressing the back of your hand with her palm.
“even if i don’t understand why you get angry and why you ignore me, i still like you. that’s what makes you, you. and love is all about understanding.”
you nod. all the crying has made you feel drowsy, and your fatigue is apparent, since karina smiles in amusement and says, “wash up and take a nap. i’ll be here.”
she’ll be here.
“thank you, jimin.”
karina, or rather, jimin, chuckles, “hurry up and shower. i hope you brought extra clothes since i’m going to change too.”
you quickly wash up and so does jimin. the two of you settle into the bed, your hands clutching at jimin for warmth and intimacy. you have her. the thought allows you to drift asleep, finally knowing that jimin’s heart beats the same for yours.
when the sun sets as you wake up from your nap, you can’t help but blurt out, “i adore you.”
jimin, pleasantly surprised, only giggles back.
“i adore you too, in ways words cannot express.”
maybe paris wasn’t the city of love. yours was milan.
🎙️ author’s note: this is probably one of my favourite fics i’ve written. most of my own personal values have been put into this fic. regret is a stupid thing, we only live once and we have no idea if we’ll ever get to live again. find people that makes life worth living for. happy birthday yu jimin, aespa’s stupid cheese cat 🤍
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I honestly don't get why Maria was so anti-Joel oh he's a horrible person he's done horrible things he can't be around us, but accepted Tommy fully to the point he's the father of her child when both did the same things, ran with the same people and all of that.
I mean I love the character, but that confuses the hell out of me. Why's Tommy accepted but Joel damned?
okay, so… this response took me like half hour to write. my wrists hurt, my jaw is clenched, my brain is hot. i love u anon thank u very much for this chance to vent about just why my girl maria has been so misunderstood. let’s go
i personally think this is where many people fundamentally misunderstand maria’s perception of joel. she’s not cautious of him primarily because of tommy or anything tommy has said, in my personal opinion—she’s cautious of him for and because of ellie
ive said this on my blog a few times and i think so have @steeb-stn and @clickergossip (and maybe @liveandletcry23 and @bumblepony i have a shit memory so tagging just in case) so im gonna tag them to credit their words and ideas about maria as well, but the FIRST time maria sees joel, he’s with this rando twelve year old girl who he is seemingly so protective over that she cant even be sniffed by dogs who are just trying to detect infection, which would be good for ANYBODY. that’s his first strike for untrustworthyness, because why the fuck wouldn’t he let this girl be tested???—we know why, of course, but maria doesnt. shes working on the very limited info about joel/ellie’s relationship that she has from just her own observations, and i think we need to remember that as we go through analyzing why she moves how she moves
shes knows from tommy at this point is that joel had a daughter, but it is definitely not this little girl. so why the fuck are they so close. what have they gone through. are they okay. is ellie okay. is their relationship safe for her??? THAT’s what she’s thinking about, in my opinion, while shes staring joel down at that dinner table. she’s reasonbly suspicious, and i can’t blame her for it.
i had to cut this it’s literally maybe my longest post ever so. heres the cut
ALSO, it’s not like she’s a straight up bitch to joel like some of y’all seem to make it out to be??? she never says or implies that “they can’t be around” or anything like that. she offers them clothes and food and supplies. she sets them up in a house. before dinner, she gives them a personal tour (which, to be fair, she did because she was probably trying to keep an eye on them and figure out more about whether or not ellie is safe, but who wouldnt???? i know tess would! and yall would love her for it!). tommy literally says to joel before they leave that there will always be a place for him and ellie in jackson—you cannot tell me you believe he said so without already have maria’s green light for joel and ellie to stay
ALSO, i wanna consider some other things that i haven’t seen many ppl talk about. on that walk she takes with tommy and joel and ellie, she makes it sound like tommy has been with them for at least years AND she maintains the confidence to say that residents in jackson stay off the radio—i could totally be wrong, but it seems to me from the look tommy and joel share right after that it’s obvious tommy has been talking to joel BEHIND MARIA’S BACK???? did no one else catch that??? am i misinterpreting big time??? id assume because theyre married and from the way tommy talks about jackson that he’s been in jackson for at least 3 years maybe, and we know that he only stopped radioing joel a couple months before the show’s main plotline starts, so timeline wise there had to be some overlap of tommy still radioing joel from/around jackson. idk if anyone of my mutuals has thoughts on this but i personally think it’s important to point out, because it establishes that maria likely doesn’t know or think tommy and joel kept in contact, at least not as recently as up to some months ago. she knows that tommy and joel are close, but at the same time, she doesn’t think tommy really knows or talks to joel anymore, either. so how is she supposed to extend him any trust as tommy’s brother????? how and why would she give this man any benefit of the doubt???? it wouldn’t make any sense. she’s more practical and discerning than she is naive and kind, and y’all can think what y’al want about that but i love her for it. it’s very necessary for a woman like her to be the way she is
okay, so back to your question. back to why joel is “damned” and tommy is “accepted.” let’s talk about joel for a sec
y’all like to babygirl and idolize the absolute fuck out of this man
we know that not only was he a smuggler, but he killed and tricked and took advantage of people, shamelessly and brutally. we know that tommy did so too. maria knows that tommy has done the same things. maria also knows that tommy left that life because he couldnt do it anymore, and joel continued because he could
point blank period!!!!! yall can argue with me all u want but tommy left that murder life and joel did not. im not saying this makes either brother good or bad or better than the other, i love joel sm and i think both of them have an undisputed capability to do unspeakable things in order to survive. but tommy got to a point where he hit a limit, whereas joel doesn’t seem to have one. this is at least my personal interpretation of their conversations in the game and the show
tommy DID join the fireflies, which we all know now is not any fucking better than whatever the fuck joel was doing—the difference is the reasoning, though, and considering tlou is all about reasoning and the why, we need to consider the reasoning behind tommy’s decision: he wanted to do something better, something good, something he thought had a purpose. we all know now that the fireflies are bullshit, their purpose is bullshit, and they’re willingness to kill a child for the sake of the “cure” is it’s own entire paradox of bullshit. but they were a rebel organization fighting fedra, who fucking suck, and probably had somewhat of a better reputation back when tommy was interested in joining—or maybe they didn’t, to be fair, i don’t know! the point is, tommy went to them seeking some sort of better purpose, some type of redeption; in joel’s own fucking words, “tommy’s what we used to call a joiner. had dreams of becoming a hero... wants to save the world.”
tommy is idealistic. he’s romantic. he’s optimistic, almost to the point of being fucking naive. thats why he enlisted in the army, thats why he enlisted in the fireflies—he wanted to feel good about himself and the world he was living in. he needed it to have some light at the end of the tunnel for all the bullshit to make sense. and yeah, he was wrong both times in joining up. we know that, joel knew that while it was happening, and tommy knows that in retrospect, too. i think jackson is the first place he really found true, real purpose—not the kind that is propagandized to you and goes up in smoke, but the kind that is well and truly earned. that’s why he is so loyal to jackson and to maria—they finally gave him was he desperately spent his life searching for
and im just saying, from maria’s perspective, she’s someone who lives for purpose. she lives for jackson and for it’s people and for it’s future, and she has to maintain some sense of idealism in the face of all that fucking ugliness to be able to mentally live im and run a place like jackson, to believe that it’ll work. i think that idealism she has, she sees reflected in tommy’s desperation to be a better person who’s fighting for a better life. she sees that need for redemption and goodness in him, that need for things to be fucking worth it, and hears she hears it in his story. she gets to relate to him with this in a way she doesnt GET TO RELATE with joel YET (we STILL HAVE TIME PEOPLE. WE HOLDIN OUT STRONG FOR THE JOEL AND MARIA BEST FRIEND AGENDA)
but to continue, THEN maria spends YEARS with tommy, getting to know him, getting to know his guilt. just like tess with joel, she’s sees the worst and the best of him and gets to fall in love with all of it. so of course there’s gonna be a bit of a bias and a blindspot, towards him—just like any of are other characters have weak spots for the people THEY fucking love
so that’s i guess why i think tommy is “accepted” by her, i guess, and there’s honestly way more them and their romance that i could make a whole separate post about but i’ll leave it there for now. back to joel and why he’s “damned,” which i don’t think he is
again, from what maria knows, he made an active CHOICE to stay in the lifestyle of smuggling and murdering and QZ bullshit, even after tommy chose to leave—and idk what y’all imagine joel and tess to be doing in those many years on their own, but it’s not fuckin picking flowers, for me. they’re dangerous, dangerous people—more dangerous that fedra, and more dangerous than the fireflies, if we’re being fucking real about it. and we LOVE tess and joel for this, or at least i do
but jackson is not a place where people get by with smuggling or backstreet deals or threats. it’s not supposed to be that place. we all LOVE jackson in fics and hcs and aus because it’s literally a place where joel and ellie finally get to breathe and not worry about their safety/survival first. and you know who keeps jackson that way????? MARIA. AND HE BEING FUCKING PICKING ABOUT WHO JACKSON LETS THE FUCK INSIDE
so yall just expect her to by YIPPY SKIPPY when joel, THE JOEL THE SUPER SMUGGLER MURDER COWBOY, strolls into town????? WITHOUT TESS, WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE MORE PERSONABLE AND REASONABLE ONE???? what????? she’d be crazy not to at least try to be a little intimidating, to make it clear to joel that he will not get away with any of that qz bullshit here. she’d be naive not to, and maria is anything but naive
and i know most people don’t like her for that “a bad reputation doesn’t mean you’re bad” “not always, at least” line, but i actually think it really fits so well in establishing that she’s not afraid of joel, not afraid of challenging him or making him own up to things he’s done. it’s just so so cool to me, i just can’t hate her for that????? she’s establishing with him that she knows what tommy knows about his time in the QZ, and she’s letting him know if that joel shows up here in jackson, there will be fucking problems for him. which i think is a completely fair warning????
so let’s continue. let’s talk about The Scene, the one with her and ellie, the one with the “tommy was following joel” line. ONE thing i’d like to point out about this scene—MARIA IS THE ONE TO TELL ELLIE ABOUT SARAH, NOT JOEL. AND THAT IS A BIG BIG BIG REASON FOR WHY SHE WARNS ELLIE NOT TO TRUST JOEL COMPLETELY
we know what joel and ellie have gone through, at this point, but maria has barely any idea. she sees that ellie has this fierce protectiveness and lots of secrets when it comes to her and joel, which like—can we all be fucking objective here for a second. this can SO easily and SO reasonably be interpreted as something sketchy going on between joel and ellie that maria should be concerned about.
(slight tw about older men-younger woman relationships bc im gonna be personal for a sec, its quick) we don’t know maria’s past or what she has seen or been through, but personally as someone who has been in a situation where an older man has taken advantage of my naivety in the past, i am now extremely hyper vigilant when it comes to young girls around older men in my personal life today. ellie and joel’s situation and how it looks would raise MJAOR red flags for me personally, if i was in maria’s position. that’s just a personal perspective have that really affects the way i view this scene (end tw)
and so maria finds out that joel has kept the fact that HE HAD A WHOLE ASS DAUGHTER from ellie?????? WOULD THAT NOT BE SUS AT ALL TO YALL???? i mean we know why joel doesn’t tell ellie, as gameplayers and watchers of the show, but again. maria is operating on the info she has right in front of her, which is that joel has been omitting maybe the biggest fact of his life from this young girl who is willing to defend and trust him with her entire life, even after she finds out she’s being lied to. this is alarming
so at this point, she’s questioning joel’s intentions with ellie, and in my opinion, it’s not at all unreasonable for her to do so. she then continues to press, because the red flags are flying and she wants ellie to be crystal clear on the kind of man she’s traveling with (“there are CLEARLY things you don’t know about joel” — “so then you understand my concerns”)
AND THEN ELLIE. BLESSED SMART AMAZING ELLIE COMES IN WITH THE DEFENSE—“and tommy did it too, are you worried about him?”—which like, i love this line. i love this moment. i think because i go so hard for maria a lot of y’all think i’m blind to when ellie is making points, but i 100% cheered her on when i first watched this scene, like i’m sure y’all did—because it’s true! it’s fair! if maria is going to judge joel for those things, she needs to extend the same judgement to tommy
the thing is, it’s still fucking true that, as i said earlier, tommy left that life. both the smuggling, and the fireflies—he chose to stop, while joel didn’t—he was smuggling literally up until the day him and tess found ellie, so. there’s that. she continues to judge joel and not tommy because she knows for sure that tommy has changed. she doesn’t know joel enough yet to see that he has changed, too
so then, the dreaded line: “tommy was following joel.” let’s talk about it.
i don’t love this line either, tbh! i think it’s a weak defense on maria’s part, and a weak line on the tlou hbo writers part—probably my least favorite line of maria’s overall. but i do get why she says it, and i kind of think i get the purpose??? i think????
it reminds me a lot of joel’s line, earlier, about tommy being a “joiner,” and i think it’s funny that, as opposite as joel and maria like to think they both are to each other, the way they describe tommy is pretty much the same. tommy is a “joiner” to joel and a “follower” to maria, and in all respects they both love and hate him for it. idk where i’m going with that exactly, just something interesting to think about in terms of the joel and maria best friend agenda
but i also think this line get’s taken out of context a lot, because the full line is “tommy was following joel, the way you are now.” maria says this line to lead into her main point, the really fucking important line in this scene: “be careful who you put your faith in. the only ones who can betray us, are the one’s we trust.”
WHICH IS TRUE. IT IS THE POINT. AND WHEN JOEL LIES TO ELLIE, HIDES SOMETHING FROM HER YET AGAIN at the end of the season/game, IT BECOMES A THEMATIC CLIMAX POINT THAT CONNECTS BOTH OF THE GAMES
maria is not saying this to “damn” joel—and i personally don’t think she is “damning” joel in the way you imply here, as there’s definitely potential for them to develop a relationship in s2 once she has more information about the truth of how he thinks of ellie. i think she’s warning ellie not to trust joel, because she doesn’t trust joel, at the end of the fucking day—and that’s about it. she trusts tommy in a way that she can’t quite trust joel yet, and why would she, at this point? it would make no sense for her to
so y’all can blame her and hate her for her distrust all you guys want (btw not necessarily talking to you, anon, ive just gotten some very nasty asks about maria from others so im talking to them rn!!!!!!!), but i’m sorry—you can’t tell me that it doesn’t at least make sense. she’s MARIA. she’s MADE OF SENSE
#WHEW#DO MY THUMBS HURT#i cant even be bothered to tag this fr#maria miller#asked and answered#joel and maria best friend agenda#tommy miller#joel miller#tess servopoulos
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darlingpost darling post get out while u still can
this is my ososan self insert darling! not their real name they get named a la homestuck aka they need a name and so thats what we call this guy
visual arts student in their last year, no gender unless its funny, always wear comfy or flowy clothes that hide the chest (SHRODINGERS BOOBS?? ((they r flat theyre like a ken doll, )))
le ref sheet
IN MY HEAD darling was like photocopying some doujin pages they were working on (for fun) at some store bc their printer broke or wathevs and then fucked up and suddenlly all the papers are scattered everywhere!!! noooo the gay porn!!! and karamatsu is like oh hang on let me help u with those my good sir (darling is dressed like a mess here) and darling is so fucking embarrassed but still goes like ummm thank uuu??? and karamatsu is like of course! no need to thank me!! karmatsu matsuno!!!<introduces himself here and darling is like waaaa he so nice and doesnt think im a freak for LITERALLY PRINTING GAY PORN IN PUBLIC WHAT THE FUCK anyway they do small talk with like ah yes great work here get home safe dont lose those papers again yes sir yes sir!!
karamatsu goes on with his life but darling is like waaa he was so nice i wanna be friends or something but idk if i will everrr find him again siiighhh. buut like one week later darling is all dressed up on theyr way to the city museum bc they help out there for school credit (is that a thing in japan idk this is me playing with dolls) but still have some time to kill to get there and on the way they see karamatsu in the distance and darling is like oh! i can say hi!! so they go but bc they r dressed more cutesy now karamatsu immediately starts doing his bit before darling even says hi hes like: "AH YES OUR FATED MEETING WAS WRITTEN IN THE STARS!! YES IVE BEEN SEEING U IN MY DREAMS AND MAY IT BE FATE THAT HAS BROUGHT U TOGETHER¿ RIGHT NOW MY **DARLING**!!" or something like that and darling is an idiot so they go "OMG HE REMEMBERS ME FROM LAST TIME! AND HE WANTS ME TO KEEP HIM COMPANY!! OR SOMETHING IM NOT SURE WHATS HE TALKING ABOUT!" point is darling doesn't ask for his name cause they already know it and karamatsu quite literally just names them darling and then they go on a not date to the museum cause i say so
dont get me wrong i ship them but also theyre both so fail at this bc darling is an airhead and karamatsu is....karamatsu
they would be the kind of ship that starts dating without knowing which i find funny bc karamatsu would make a big deal out of asking darling out and darling would be like oh as a friend right and would miss every romance cue ever but then when darling would be like hey are we dating and karamatsuu would be like *dies from both exasperation and relief* and then darling would be too concerned about getting him to the hospital and forgets about the dating part im hjust having fun here
darling tag with silly stuff
ANYWAY darlin n karamatsu are besties darling likes hearing him talk bc its funny and they compliment him on his spakly stuff n music even tho darling knows shit abt music and karamatsu hangs around trying to cheerlead darling on stuff and darling does the same, idiot to idiot communication,
ALSO darling cant see very well n they make a very goofy lights r on nobodys home face whenever they dont wear their glasses and confuse the matsus constantly at the start probably lol,
like after hanging out a bit darling probably sees totty in the city and they go OMGG KARAMACHAN U DIDNT TELL ME U WERE GOnna be in the city we could hang out and ur dressed in pink if i wore my pink cardigan we could maaatch and then realizes, they fucked up and totty is like KARAMACCHAN WHO, but totty was like, with friends and the girls are like omg totty who is this and darling is like TOTTY WHO, and his friends rope darling into hanging out bc darling straight up glomped totty there and they r never living that down ever.
and then todomatsu confronts karamatsu like DO YOU KNOW THIS GIRL and karamatsu is like ah thats darling and totty is like DIE?? anyway they get along fine n totty calls them dari-chan i think darling also gets along with osomatsu darling draws him silly stuff on request n sometimes tries to play with jyushimatsu (dies) ichi probs thinks darling has something wrong in the head to hang out w karamatsu (they do) and choromatsu is like perpetually confused, no one uses the same set of pronouns for darling which creates confusion at the start
darling is technically a nickname (and an overly cutesy one too!) so darling gets named that way by karamatsu at the start so they go oh i guess we r besties for life now and so they go like ok so i need a cutesy nickname for him so they do that and with totty darling fucks up introducing themself to him so they end up being dari-chan to him as a way to make an even more cutesy name out of an already cute nickname i just think thats funny
uuu what else what else, picky eater of the eats meat variety, short, cant see, tummy hurts, lightweight but doesnt care, this is literally me bro, this post is already so fucking long idk what else more, im just playing with dolls man
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life update!!!!
hi hello friends good morning good afternoon good evening its that time of the month again! this isnt really a big life update like the last time bcs i just thought id list down a bunch of things ive had on my mind.
first of all, im very happy to announce that i was able to watch 16 movies last march !! exciting!! i know ive said the last time that i quit the bingewatching thing but HONESTLY im in a work from home setup and the only way to keep me inspired is by watching a movie ... i am yet to find other ways to stay inspired so watching movies will just do for now... ALSO im gonna try to update my newsletter for the first time this year and itll probably be about the movies that i saw this march that i liked ! im now comfortable with turning the newsletter to be more about movies bcs nothing major has been happening in my life lol . so pls stay tuned for that newsletter post if ur interested!
another thing is ive decided to make this blog more personal! for the past year ive made this blog to be more about movies and gifs and stuff, and as much as i love getting the notes and reading ppl's tags, im going to try and make this blog work for me this time :) hope it doesnt get annoying or something... im also in the process of fixing my about pages and tags and all. ive used tumblr since 2012 so im still struggling with the setup. LIKE yes i want to maximize the fact that you can edit html pages and its cute and lets me be creative but at the same time, im on my phone majority of the time . and i dont like being on my laptop after work because ive literally just been using a laptop the whole day. for work. im rly shy to post some stuff about me (bcs i havent done it before fr insert the tom hanks dialogue from joe vs the volcano abt doing some soul searching and coming to the conclusion that hes just boring so he stops doing it) so if u see me doing it as an attempt to fix the personal pages on my blog, im sorry! AAAND as for the gifs thing, im thinking of changing my film diary tag, one thing i really enjoy is taking note of dialogues i love from a movie so i might just do screenshots. i really miss making gifs even though most of the gifs i end up with are LQ , but it just really isnt feasible now . (also some movies are just so tempting to gif LIKEEE valley girl and everytime we say goodbye 😭😭 it physically hurts me that i cant gif josh whitehouse and tom hanks in those movies....)
ALSO im really very very happy that ive gained new followers recently. i enjoy chatting with you guys and get so happy whenever i get the notif that someone sent me an ask/message!! ive been idle on stan twt/fandoms in general so its been a really long time since ive actually... talked to people... it makes me really happy talking to u and im sorry if my happiness doesnt show in my replies/posts. as i said, its been a while since ive done this and i usually go on here as soon as im off work (when my brain is semi-fried and the words are not wording anymore) . i hope i dont come across as bored/uninterested :(
and it isnt just about fandoms too, im genuinely insterested what u guys are up to lately and all... (in a non stalker way). it just feels nice to have friends in general ^__^
SO YEA, i think thats about it :) if u've read this all until here ilysm! thanks for ur interest and lmk how ur day was! or just send me something u want to talk about !
have a nice day :)
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wait i just wanted to say (forgot to put this in the last ask) i feel like that makes so much sense with how sooha's mother always told her "dont show your ability. no matter what." its not because she thinks her child will be mistaken for a vampire (which yeah, whatever, kids will be mean and call her a monster for her powers), but because she wants her daughter under the radar so the organization doesn't hear of an eighth superpowered child and come kidnap sooha. in the webnovel/comic, the low-grade vamps (hired by the organization), are looking for "a girl with special powers." the last child of the experiments.
bro im like . INCREDIBLY impressed with all the lore you filled in around the vampire goddess and why c!sunoo is suspicious as shit in mvs sometimes. i was wondering why he had so many scenes where he was singled out bc it was ringing all sorts of "THIS IS IMPORTANT" bells. YALL RLY DID PUT HIM THROUGH SOME SHIT AND YOU KNOW WHAT. I KIND OF LIKE IT BETTER THAT WAY ITS GOT DEPTH. SELENE IS A GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS (this is a joke). also i Just realized at this moment that i repeated a lot of things you said already in the last ask bc i was looKING AT THE WRONG RESPONSE WHOOPS I HOPE U ENJOY THE CONTENT ANYWAY.
listen all vampires deserve a little homoeroticism as a treat
-vrvr anon
(ive started attempting to put lil intros before these asks so my followers have as little as possible to scroll through from me HDJBFFJ)
NO YEAH I WAS THINKING ABOUT THAT and i was gonna address it in the answer to the last ask until i remembered that you talked about it in this one (id read both beforehand) and figured id just talk about it here. sooha's mom doesn't want people knowing about her ability because if anyone knows about it, that could be a VERY FAST shortcut to the organization knowing about it, which is not good on ANY front. and wait also wasnt there a whole plotline where sooha's family moved towns a lot as a kid, supposedly because sooha got branded as a vampire in every town they were in? what if it was ACTUALLY because sooha's mother wanted to keep them moving so the organization couldn't put a pin on their location?
also shit i just had a thought about chris. so. you know. he was killed by a vampire, and everyone in the town thought sooha did it. but weve also established by now that the organization employs low-grade vampires to do their dirty work. so what if. the organization caught wind of sooha and chris's relationship somehow; they heard about this boy to whom sooha told everything, shared her powers, trusted with her life. and they killed him. they killed him as a warning—not to sooha, but to her mother, to say "we're close. we'll find you. you aren't safe." and after seeing that, sooha's mother knew what it meant, so she took she and her daughter and began running. never again would they settle in a single town for long.
(that would also explain how the low-grade vampires know to use a fake chris to lure sooha later on—they would know, because THEY killed him. the organization ordered them to.)
OKAY NOW ABOUT C!SUNOO. THANK YOU we had.... far too much fun with that probably HDJFBFJFN. funfact we actually had two seperate universes/tags going, one for all our own personal storyline ideas for the enhaverse/dark moon (so where c!sunoo was manipulated by the queen to betray the others because we didn't want to break up the ✨squad✨), and then one for what we thought ACTUAL CANON was more likely to be, where c!sunoo was just straight-up evil and self-serving for... some reason. and then the dark moon dropped and both of them ended up being wrong-- seriously, hybe, what the fuck happened to that? im lowkey so confused because here they were dropping all this sus shit about sunoo's character into the mvs (the blood in the fountain in drunk-dazed, the fucking sMIRK as he's walking down the hallway, all the concept photos for tamed-dashed era where he looked evil/scheming as fuck), and then as it turns out c!sunoo (shion) is just... a happy-go-lucky catboy? what?
SELENE GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS YES SO TRUE ✨✨✨
(also yes to the vampire homoeroticism <33 vampires and homoeroticism go together sort of like wine and cheese i think) (i mean ive never actually had wine so i wouldnt know but it feels right to say) (they compliment each other)
#asks#anon 📝#vrvr anon#dark moon universe#dark moon stuff#dark moon#also just realized while going back through my enhaverse tag that i spelled her name as celine. but whatever
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i’m about to vent in the tags, feel free to read if ur a chismosx/e like i am and want to know about a strangers life 🤪
#ive talked about this girl before in the tags so if u keep up with my vents thank u lol#but i met up with my old high school crush who was also my friend#and like how do i even explain it#should i even try to be friends with her like what am i expecting out of this#it’s clear to me that i want her to recíprocate these feelings that i hold#and it’s not gonna happen!!#and like hanging out with her always brings up old insecurities and i hate that#i got a friend group that i made outside of high school and at my city college#and around them i’m comfortable and i’m like is it because i don’t have a crush on any of y’all? lol what is it that makes it hard for me#to be friends with friends from high school? is it seriously because i’m queer? like what the fuck is it she wants me to be part of this#friend group like old times but i always leave these meet ups feeling sad and just out of place#i feel like i’m too much around them esp around her#for it being a queer crush it doesn’t make me feel good. i feel too fat and i feel ugly like why!!!!!!!#like this is one aspect of my life i cant for the life of my figure out. why can’t i move on why can’t i tell her i hold these feelings for#her even after all this time and that she makes me feel bad abojt myself#and i know it’s a me problem i completely get that#but jesus why the fuck do i feel too ‘other’ around her and why am i trying to heal that by hoping for her romantic feelings back for me#i know my answer is that i need to move the fuck on and away from hee#but i don’t want to and i need to understand why#am i afraid to find someone who could realistically care for me? and love me and i can love back without shame?#there is no hope there so why am i looking for? what am i waiting for to come out of it#god i’m not gonna beg for love because i am worth of love esp romantic love#so i don’t want to beg for her love because she’s not gonna give it#and i don’t want it anymore god i don’t want it#i want to love freely and unashamedly and it can’t be with her i realize that now#so it’s time for me to move on i have to i do#i hate that she tried to incorporate me into her friend group again and again i can’t do this again#it’s so obvious that i’m outta place why keep trying to incorporate me#why give me this hope we had stopped talking and she sent me a letter god damn it#she opened up old feelings of love and hate and i don’t want that
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i may or may not be a little too obsessed with dbf!jamie so I have a few questions:
how do the parents find out about their relationship? and how to they react?
I have this image in my head that everyone - literally everyone has a crush on Jamie in their neighbourhood so how would mc deal with women throwing themselves at him, especially when she has to act unbothered and such.
AND IVE SEEN THE BREEDING KINK TAG AND PLEASE ELABORATE ON THAT IM DESPERATE
anon bestie u got me spitballin with this one. nsfw breeding kink talk under the cuttt
MORE DBF!JAMIE | gimme ur thoughts/questions! x
HANDLING JEALOUSY: everyone for sure has a crush on jamie. i also imagine jamie was an entire heartbreaker (lil slutty phase?) before he moved into the neighbourhood, so he carries this air of confidence around people interested in him. he’s a flirt in an understated way, polite and gentlemanly to a fault sometimes, so it isn’t surprising when people try their luck with him.
before you start seeing jamie, it’s a little disheartening. there’s a long time where you feel like a stupid kid with a crush and no chance, and here he is, at this barbecue being very publicly propositioned by a beautiful woman closer to his age, and he’s too polite to tell her he’s not interested right away, but you go home too early to see him finally let her down gently (which also means you’re gone before he comes looking for you, having made you up a plate before the best food was gone).
after you start seeing him, though, while it’s a little grating to not be able to walk up and kiss him and put an end to the charade, it’s mostly fun. it’s fun to see him brush off others, knowing he’s all in for you. it’s especially fun when you can scroll down to the album buried deep in your phone and text him a photo from your last time alone together and watch as he opens it and tries to keep a straight face in front of whoever’s talking to him.
YOUR PARENTS FINDING OUT: so part of me wants to write the huge blow up and falling out which would occur if your parents interrupted yall mid-stroke (lmao) and that's how they found out, but more realistically, i feel like it gets to a point where your parents have heard so many rumours, and they've watched you change over the months, going from completely disinterested in jamie to visibly excited and giddy when he's around, they kinda know what's happening, to an extent.
they sit you down alone one night and hit you really seriously with "are you interested in jamie?" and you have to be like.. he's been balls deep inside me so yeah, mom, i'm a little interested (you don’t mention how you've already been seeing him for a solid 2-3 months, what they don't know can't hurt them lmao). they're a bit uncomfortable with the idea but they let it chill for a week or two and then they're realistic about it: you're an adult and jamie isn't that much older than you, it's just a little weird that he knew your dad first, maybe.
eventually your dad pulls jamie aside and is all “you’re clearly into her too: if you break my little girl’s heart, i’ll use your remains as fish bait. also c’mon we’re going to paul’s house down the street, he got a new boat. no, my daughter cannot come.” full son-in-law mode immediately tbh
THE BREEDING KINK THING: it’s definitely this dirty little quiet thing between the pair of you, particularly while your relationship is still a secret. you never really mention it other than in the moment but it makes you feel closer to one another while you can’t be together in public. but also just the visuals.... whew
the very first time you fuck, you beg him desperately to finish inside you, so needy for him in the most whole, most intimate way, and jamie runs with it. neither of you had really known you’d be into it until it happens. it’s the first time you properly learn how filthy his mouth can be, when he pauses, overwhelmingly deep inside you and he grabs your face so you’re eye to eye with him and he smiles nearly mockingly as he asks “you’re gonna let me fill this pretty cunt, are you? is that what you want?” and you’re so fucked out you’re nearly in tears, borderline babbling as you plead for his load but he won’t finish until you give him a coherent answer describing how badly you need his cum inside you and like i said, visuals are so hot, he for sure takes pictures of it leaking out. maybe those are the pics you send to him when other women are hitting on him in public 😇
#im writing a longer more polished piece for this au but i LOVE these questions so much#thank u for letting me talk through my HCs im literally obsessed with it#dbf!jamie#jamie oleksiak imagine#jamie oleksiak fanfiction#ff.doc#long post
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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]
So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.
Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad
Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.
STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.
IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!
The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.
STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.
Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him
So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.
NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT
The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable
Those husky animation models suck lmao
Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!
God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it
Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that
But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????
Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden
This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh
Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)
THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much
Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)
Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens
On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending
Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other
YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).
Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last
Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!
Oh never mind slavery trollmarket
Bruh titanic camelot
I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things
NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH
STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER
THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN
WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?
Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person
For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues
Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy
Bruh I was grieving
PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference
Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?
NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS
Oh thank God he's okay
NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD
oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))
But I want to see him again
But I'm glad to see vex
Yay they're in arcadia!
But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((
Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)
Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them
Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus
DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE
Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.
BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.
Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.
Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???
And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole
And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!
THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!
BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????
Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭
Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora
HUZZAH
NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????
STAB THAT BITCH JIM
WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED
Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it
SEVEN KIDS?????????
T O B Y ????????????
W A I T NO
N O
IS HE ACTUALLY
OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE
NO THERE ISN'T
F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED
Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS
I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH
W A I T
HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????
HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????
WAIT IS HE
BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON
HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????
BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending
TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all
And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.
#tales of arcadia#rise of the titans#trollhunters#rott#rise of the titans spoilers#rott spoilers#toa#3 below#athena's own original post!#jim lake jr#claire nuñez#toby domzalski
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In the end of it all, Monaca Towa was still a child.
To start this off, this isn't my usual Black Butler posts but ive been meaning to talk about Danganronpa for a hot minute, so please bear with me! Second, this is solely my opinion and before anyone wants to attack me please read thoroughly first. Thank you:)
(Spoiler warning for Danganronpa: Ultra Despair Girls and Danganronpa 3)
Also, before we dive in I'm going to list some trigger warnings:
Physcological abuse
Physical abuse
Manipulation
P*dophillia
Suicide attempt
Violence (?)
Childhood trauma
Please take care and read at your own risk<3
Hello there Danganronpa fandom! Today I will be talking about Monaca Towa (as stated in the title) and how people often minimize her trauma and sometimes forget the fact that shes still a child who got heavily manipulated by Junko too.
Monaca is seemingly very amiable and caring, because of her charming personality, all of the Warriors of Hope love her and try their best to keep her happy and go along with what she wants. However, it's slowly revealed that she is actually manipulative and cunning behind her friendly facade.
Monoca is a character that is cruel, manipulative, and extremly unhinged. Many of her actions cannot be excused or justified, but you can understand where she's coming from.
Monaca's Backstory:
She was born an unwanted child by both her father and her mother. Monaca's mother was supposed to take care of her but instead abandoned the child soon after her birth. Because of all her actions, Monaca saw her mother as a completely selfish and pathetic person. Monaca's father thought of giving her to an orphanage but instead took her into his family.
However, Monaca was always unwanted and everyone else felt uncomfortable around her. Every time Monaca smiled or joked, the others looked at her coldly, as if she didn't deserve to laugh. Every time she spoke, the others turned silent. His older-half brother thought of her as an alien, not part of the family.
She was also physically abused to the point that she pretended to be seriously wounded for them to stop as a result.
Monaca also attended Hope's Peak Elementary School and was part of the "trouble-makers class" along with Nagisa, Masaru, Jataro, and Kotoko.
Along with her fellow abused classmates, she planned a group suicide; however, Monaca never had any plans to commit suicide in the first place and was planning to let the others die as a prank.
The group suicide was stopped by Junko, who took the kids in and manipulated them by treating them with kindness and love.
Monaca then helped Junko mass produce Monokumas for the Tragedy by using her position as a representative of the Towa Group.
She lied to her father and the other adults in order to produce the Monokumas, telling them that she wanted to create futuristic robots that could be domestic helpers and emergency aid workers.
Due to her separation from the family and her genius, her family decided to give her leg room to do what she wanted as long as she brought in profits to the company, and didn't delve too deeply into her plans.
Things to keep in mind about Monoca's backstory:
She was emotionally and physically abused from a very young age.
She started to pretend to be paraplegic because she was finally treated with some kindness and she could have more control over people.
She convinced Nagisa, Jataro, Kotoko and Masaru to commit suicide.
Out of all the Warriros of Hope, Junko took the most intrest in Monoca due to her position, meaning that she was the one who got used and manipulated the most.
How Monoca's mindset works:
The moment she got physically abused to the point that she had to fake her injuries to make her family feel bad was the moment she learned that through sympathy from others comes power. Due to her families neglection and abuse, she started to quickly pick up on things in which benefited her yet hurt others.
She started to use manipulative tactics on her family to gain control over them. She then started implicating these tactics with the Warriors of Hope.
When Junko got into the picture, everything changed for the worst. Junko was the only person in Monaca's life who showed her affection. Even though deep down Monaca knew Junko only cared for her as a means to use her robotics genius for the Tragedy, Monaca didn't care, and happily helped out Junko with her plans if it meant being loved and appreciated in return. At the heart of it, despite all her horrific acts, that's a very child-like thing to do, right? So when Junko dies, Monaca's entire reason for living basically disappears.
AI Junko via Kurokuma may have planted the idea of a successor in her head, but in Monaca's mind it's a way to get her big sis back, and very specifically chooses to mold Komaru into becoming Junko's successor. That's for a big reason, Monaca doesn't want to become Junko, I'd say she actually just wanted her big sister back who would love and appreciate her again, and hence tried to make someone else take on that role initially. Once again, that's the mindset of a child.
Monaca's relationship with the Warriors of Hope:
The Warriors of Hope are a group of children who are extremely resentful and hateful of adults, regardless of whether or not they were involved in their rough paths.
We all know that the Warriros of Hope are extememly tramutized kids. Masaru had alcoholic parents who physically abused him, Jataro was physcologically abused to the point he bealived he was so ugly that if anyone saw his "repulsive" face they would die, Kotoko was r*ped multiple times by disgusting p*dophilic men (not to mention, Monaca's brother was attracted to her), and last but not least we have Nagisa who had pressuring parents who wanted to raise him as the child prodigy and expirimented on him constantly.
Monaca used the Warriros of Hope's trauma against them, manipulating them to the point were they had to do her bidding completly.
As much as I hate to say it, Monaca truly saw them as pawns. Although there are some instances where she openly declares her care for the Warriors of Hope, it's likely she does that as a form of emotional manipulation.
If anything, she probably did see them as equal in the beginning but then when she started to gain control over her own family, she started to do the same with the Warriors of Hope as a way to protect herself from getting hurt, then again this is my baseless assumption.
Her dynamic with Nagito:
Monaca was amused by Nagito's strange behavior and contradicting beliefs and appeared to be somewhat annoyed with him at the times. However, the two appeared to at least seemingly respect each other in some way, as they treated each other somewhat formally as allies.
Her dynamic with Nagito is one of the most intresting ones. Obviously I think that her being rasied by Nagito was potentially a dangerous thing, considering Nagito's goal was for Monaca to become Enoshima's successor. Monaca seemed to agree with this goal, but Nagito's constant rambling about hope and despair made Monaca bored and feel embarrassed about the whole thing.
She claims he made her an adult in a way, as she grew up in the mental sense and became more cynical and apathetic, not really caring about anything.
In the end, Monaca found Nagito creepy and annoying, but she also appeared to get closer to him during their time together, while originally calling him just "Mister Servant" in UDG, she later refers to him as "Big Bro" in Danganronpa 3. I do think their dynamic was sort of soft and I would've loved to have seen more of it. Honestly the concept of Nagito being a soft brother to Monaca warms my heart, and the wasted potential will forever anger me.
(If any Danganronpa fanfic writer or any writer in general is reading this post: if u could be so kind and do a PLATONIC Nagito and Monaca prompt and tag me in it, I would love you forever!!)
My opinion on Monaca:
I think that Monaca was a very well-written character who deserved more than what she got in the end of Danganronpa 3. She was abused, mistreated and belittled by her family. If anything, I see her as a completely misguided little girl. If she actually had a positive authoritative influence in her life, she wouldn't have turned astray.
A lot of people disregard Monaca's trauma and forget that at the end of the day, Monaca was a child who the moment she was born, the people who were supposed to love her were unwelcoming.
Don't get me wrong though, there is no way in hell I will ever justify or condone the things Monaca has done. If anything, I just think that she alongside the rest of the Warriors of Hope should've been properly taken care of.
Also, if you dislike/hate Monaca thats 100% valid! She did a lot of inexcusable things and its alright to hate on her. I personally love her character but I know she is not everyones cup of tea.
If you read all the way, I'm actually surprised! Thank you and I hope you enjoyed<333
#Danganronpa#danganronpa text post#Warriors of hope#kotoko utsugi#masaru daimon#jataro kemuri#nagisa shingetsu#Monoca Towa#Monokuma#Junko enoshima#Nagito komaeda#Ultra despair girls#udg#udg nagito#Danganronpa 3#Komaru Naegi#Toko fukawa#Tokomaru#Hope and despair#Monaca Towa#Haji Towa
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Hiiii can i request prompt 53 with tsukki? My annoying cousin u may know @chibiiichan(i cant tag her its a surprise) recommend ur account and well she never been right more than now I LIKE UR ACC TOO URM JUST TAG HER IN THE POST (bcs its actually her birthday next week monday so....the least i could do this bcs she likes tsukki and shes recently talk abt the iwazumi story of yours....lmao shes cringe but in the same time got mad n i was besides her hearing her whining like bruh 'its 1 am'...i know i should buy something for her but she got spoiled enough 💅...that mf-) thank you ✨
‘ALWAYS AND FOREVER’
TSUKISHIMA X READER
2K WORDS
GENRE: ANGST,FLUFF
TW: SLIGHT AMBIGIOUS MENTION OF SUICIDE/ASSISTED DEATH, AND DEATH, CURSING (IN MY A/N)
THIS IS FOR @chibiiichann Happy birthday, I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS (BECAUSE I HATE IT :D ) SOOOOO YEAH I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR BIRTHDAY.
NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL. EXPECT SLIGHT MISTAKES
You were dying. You knew it. Your husband, Kei, knew it. Even friends you haven’t spoken too since high school knew it.
So why did you all pretend that everything was okay?
5 year old Y/N:
You were running around your neighbourhood park chasing after butterflies, without a care in the world. As you were frollicing in the grass, you manage to trip over a rock tumbling to the ground scraping your knee making it bleed. Looking down at your slightly injured knee, your lip begins to quiver which eventually leads to wails of tears streaming down your face.
“you don’t have to cry you know?” said a slightly quiet voice towering over you. Above you was a boy, quite tall with a fat pair of glasses, golden eyes and a head full of blonde locks.
“Well when I get hurt, I cry” you say matter oh factly (is that the phrase?) rubbing your nose as you sniffle. He held out a hand to you, which you immediately took shooting upwards and brushing yourself off.
The boy, after looking at you wildly, turns around and walks back to the actual park. “Oi wait,” you call at the boy swiftly following him “aren’t you going to ask my name?”
“no.” he says simply, proceeding to walk ahead.
“well my names Y/N L/N pleasure to meet you,” you say jumping in front of him so he doesn’t move, waiting for him to tell you his name...which he doesn’t. “you don’t have to be so rude you know”
“I’m not being rude” he says stiffly “ it’s just my brother says not to speak to strangers” a smirk appears on his face to say ‘you can leave me alone now.’
As if on cue, his brother approaches the both of you given the boy a slap on the back making him cringe “Hey Kei, who’s the friend you’ve made here?”
“My name is Y/N L/N and I'm here to be KEI’s best friend!” you said putting the emphasis on the word Kei after just learning that was the blondes name.
Kei rolled his eyes and sighed saying “nii-chan can we go home now” he folded his arms in annoyance.
“No Kei, you’ve got to get to know your new found friend Y/N-Chan right?” his brother said teasingly, knowing it was the last thing Kei wanted to do.
“Yes ofcourse!” you say with a toothy grin, dragging Kei along with you to his demise.
Until the sun went down, you spent the rest of your time with Kei getting to know eachother (well him getting to know you more, since you did all the speaking.) Regardless of his previous annoyance in getting to know you in the first place, Kei would be lying if he said he didn’t want to know you now.
As the sun was setting, Kei’s older brother (who’s name you learned was Akiteru) called him to tell him he had to go home because dinner was ready. Before he left, you grabbed his hand and wrapped your pinky finger around his saying “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”
back to present -
In some odd way, this was Kei’s way of looking out for you. He knew what you had was uncurable and would weaken you even more as the days go by, so pretending like nothing was wrong seemed to be best in his eyes.
Everything you and Kei did was a game or some nostalgic act that you once did when you were children. It was sweet to say the least, seeing Kei all engrossed and determined to make you happy.
Your alarm rings snapping you out of you daydream, ‘it was time for medicine’ you thought with your face scowling at the thought. Immediately on time, as always, Kei comes In the room with all your medicine thats needed.
“Aren’t you my perfect little nurse Kei” you say teasingly giving him a wink, laughing as you see his face turn red.
“Do you have to do this every time y/n?” he asks rolling his eyes at your childish behaviour.
“Oh I'm just showing love to my best and favourite nurse” you continue laughing at your own words
“Im your only ‘nurse’” he deadpans giving you your medicine as you talk.
“Well that is more reason to make you the best nurse.” you say smiling.
Silence falls between you, and you stare down at your arm watching as your husband gives you the medicine making you frown. “Do we have to keep doing this?” you ask which is probably the 1000th time you’ve asked.
“Of course we do Y/N as I’ve said yesterday and the day before that and the day before that it-”
“But do we really?” you interrupt “I can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep doing this.”
“Do you doubt me Y/N, I can do this forever” he says “ I can take care of you forever”
“But I don’t wan-”
“I’m finished, I’m going to start on dinner” he gets up and leaves the room yelling “I’ll call you when it’s done.”
Sometimes you and Kei have these conversations. And all the time it ends the same way. You complain, he ignores and then you go and have dinner.
You can understand why he doesn’t want to have this conversation. Who would want to hear about their partners complaints about practically being alive. Kei was torn, ever since he met you all he wanted to was to keep you happy. But could he compromise his own happiness for it.
15 year old Y/N - flashback
“Kei Kei, aren’t you excited!” you yell smiling widley
“Excited for what?” he asks, amused by your enthusiasm “it’s just highschool.”
“Well it’s a new highschool! Karasuno high school, to be exact.”
“And that is still just a school.” he says
“Not just any! That’s the school nii-chan went too, and even tho he lie-”
“Let’s not talk about it Y/N” he murmurs “we should go now, don’t want to be late on our first date.”
Going to Karasuno was fun, at the start everyone was pleasant and nice. But after a week or two when you and Kei were still stuck to eachother like glue, people weren’t so pleasant. Kei was like a pop idol, being gorgeous and over 6ft at just the age of 15, caused alot of attention, especially when he was always around you.
At the start, the hate you got was bearable, it was the petty bitchy notes in your locker or just people blatanly talking badly about you infront of you. People didn’t do it when you weren’t around Kei, so when he had volleyball practice (which you were so excited that he joined the team) you were a big target for the bullies to come around.
Kei didn’t really know of the bullying that happened towards you, especially since he was mainly in practice or not around when it happened. But one day in practice he heard some of his teammates, kageyama and hinata who seemed to talking about a student in one of their classes that was always getting picked on by the other girls in the year.
“Yeah and I heard that Nana-san was planning on getting her and her friends to attack Y/N-san soon.” said Hinata
“Shrimpy, who are they planning on attacking?” Kei asks to make sure he just heard the ginger correctly.
“Oh this lovely person in our class their name is Y/N-san” he says, looking at Kei’s reaction he also asks “Why? Do you know them?”
Kei doesn’t respond, and immediately leaves the gym, ignoring Hinata’s and the other members of the teams yells of ‘Where are you going tsukishima.’ He didn’t care, he just had to get to you.
He searched all the classes, asking every student if he knew where you were. Someone directs him to the toilets, where he burst through the door to see the other girls in your year surrounding you and beating you up.
“What the fuck are you doing to them?” he yells startling the girls.
“T-T-Tsukishima-san" one girl says “It’s not what it looks like.”
“Oh fuck off” he says, with them still frozen in shock “I said go!”
“And don’t think I don’t know your names either” he calls after them.
He rushes towards your bruised body on the ground and cradles you gently, confused on what to really do. “Oi Kei,” you say weakly catching his attention “I would’ve won if you didn’t come to stop the fight.” you joke making him scoff.
“Whatever you say Y/N.”
After you heal up, Kei already told on the girls that beat you up getting them suspended, and you explain how they were treating you because of their infatuation of him. And how they only did it when he wasn’t around.
Once he learns this information, he decides to quite the volleyball team, to your surprise. But you demands on making him not quit were ignored, as he excused it by saying “I have to make sure you’re always alright remember, and if that means quitting some volleyball team then so be it.”
That was one out of the many times that Kei put his happiness before yours.
Flashback over.
When you first got diagnosed, Kei was immediately researching on it as it was a very rare condition. But sadly, he only found what the doctor already told you both. It was uncurable and your immune system and your body will weaken as the days go by.
Which it did, you were a shell of your past self. It was always shocking for Kei to see, especially with you only being 25. ‘It wasn’t supposed to be this way,’ but he never let you see his sadness.
Whenever you knew Kei was sad you always reminded him “Kei, I may be dying but please don’t cry over me” every time you said, there was a slight undertone of humour in your voice which always worked in boosting Kei’s spirit.
AN: IVE GOTTEN TO THE POINT WHERE I HATE THIS SOOO IM SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR THE SHITTING RUSHED ENDING IM GOING TO PROVIDE FOR YOU LOL.
The days passed and the years went by, and you and Kei were still alive and kicking it. Doing your daily routine of you making some joke, Kei giving you your medicine and then you eating dinner. You eventually stopped complaining, realizing and remembering your promise you gave to Kei at 5 years old in that park. “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”
Of course you had your rough days, everybody did and it was even harder being sick with a terminal illness. But having Kei to guide you through the storm made It better for you.
However, Kei isnt a miracle worker. He couldn’t save you, noone could. And you both knew that. That didn’t mean it made it any easier when the medicine stopped working and your pain got too hard to bear. Kei couldn’t watch you do this anymore, “the choice is yours” he said with tears in his eyes.
So you knew what you had to do, you got in your bed pulling Kei with you, and letting him envelope you in a big hug as you both cried.
“I love you,” you say “You know that right?”
“Of course I know that, idiot” he replies “And I love you.”
“Always and forever?”
“Always and forever.”
AN: how did I END UP CRYING WHILST WRITING THIS WHEN IT MADE NO FUCKING SENSE, I WAS TRYING TO DO THIS COOL NOTEBOOK (I HAVENT EVEN WATCHED THE NOTEBOOK) ENDING WHERE ITS AMBIGIOUS AND SHIT AND I JUST GIVE UP OKAY? I APOLOGISE LOOOOOOL. I HOPE YOU ENJOY ATLEAST A SENTENCE OF THIS AT LEAST.
#haikyuu x reader comfort#haikyu angst#haikyu x reader#haikyuu fluff#haikyu scenarios#haikyu headcanons#haikyu#tsukishima kei#tsukishima imagine#tsukishima fluff#tsukishima angst#tsukishima x reader
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❝ walk you home ❞ l.dh
synopsis → “it’s just a suggestion but you could maybe put your lips on mine?”
request → “hi ive reading your works and honestly thank u for being a blog that doesn’t write smut. i feel like there are so few blogs like so. all your works make my heart feel fluffy and warm 😊 i was wondering if i could request a fluffy prompt kinda based off the nct dream song: walk you home with haechan? you have full creative freedom ❤️ thank u”
word count → 1.6k
you didn’t walk home often but when you did it always proved to be a peaceful and serene experience.
you take pleasure in the sound of the pavement beneath your feet as your legs carry you home and your hands hold on tightly to the straps of your backpack. the calm breeze blows some of your hair around and the sun’s rays shine down on you delightfully.
you decide it can’t get much better than this.
but, of course, you can’t have anything nice.
you realize this when you feel a pair of hands grasp your shoulders firmly resulting in you effectively jumping out of your skin with a loud shriek.
the culprit, none other than lee donghyuck, laughs as he watches you place your hands on your knees, trying to steady your racing heart.
“not funny, donghyuck!” you punch his arm to express your frustration. “you almost gave me a heart attack, for christ’s sake!”
he holds up his hands in defense. “okay, okay. i’m sorry. i was messing around, i thought it’d be funny.”
“oh right because sneaking up on a girl walking home alone and making her think she’s going to be kidnapped is just hilarious.”
“i really didn’t mean to scare you,” he says, genuinely. “i came here for a reason, i swear.”
you raise your brows, expectantly.
“i was just thinking i could maybe walk you home?”
you observe the way he tugs gently at the string of his hoodie, almost as if he were nervous. but why would he be nervous in front of you? you were just his best friend’s little sister.
“you want to walk with me?”
he nods in confirmation.
you play with your shirt collar, not entirely sure what to say. “that’s fine, i guess.”
with that, you continue on your route not even waiting for donghyuck who jogs to catch up to you. despite your houses being only a couple blocks away from each other, you and donghyuck had never walked anywhere together. at least, in your high school years.
when you were all much younger, him and your older brother mark would almost always walk to the bus stop together. your mother had you tag along with them and your tiny figure would often be seen trailing behind them, trying your best to keep up.
as you grew up, many things begun changing. most notably, the way you felt about donghyuck. before, all you had seen him as was mark’s obnoxious friend who pestered you relentlessly. but you had finally realized how cute and charming he truly was. you started to enjoy the way he teased you as long as it meant you had his attention. it wasn’t long before mark noticed your change in attitude and connected the dots. it was easy to say he was displeased. first of all, having you follow donghyuck all the time like a shadow proved to be very irritating. second of all, his best friend and his little sister together was something he didn’t want to even think about.
when he commented about your strange behavior to donghyuck, the boy had only said he didn’t mind it. in fact, he seemed to enjoy your little antics.
mark realized had no other choice but to take matters into his own hands. so, he sat you down one evening to have a chat with you and he certainly had no problem lying straight to your face.
“donghyuck hates you,” he had said.
you had stopped stroking your dolls hair to stare at him with eyes as big as saucers. “w-what?”
“yeah. he told me. he thinks you’re super annoying.”
and just like that, your little heart had been broken. you remember crying for hours that day and begging your mom to drive you to school so you wouldn’t have to face donghyuck in the mornings. mark even suggested that you avoid him at school too so that he wouldn’t find you anymore unpleasant than he already did. you obeyed and soon enough your trio had broken up.
ever since then, you had stayed in your own lane away from lee donghyuck who, according to your older brother, could not stand you.
“so... what’s up with you? i feel like it’s been so long since we caught up.”
you sigh, kicking at a pebble on the sidewalk. “i’m pretty okay.”
he waits, expecting you to add on. he clears his throat awkwardly when he realizes you’re not going to. you had been so talkative during your childhood, what happened? “oh, that’s good.”
for the sake of clearing the tension, you force yourself to ask him how he’s doing. “what about you?”
his face brightens up. “i’m doing good! well, grade-wise no. actually, maybe? i have straight c’s which is technically passing but not super good, you know? but other than, i‘m not bad. i finally tried out for a basketball team. remember how when we were younger i always wanted to play but they told me i was too short?”
“i remember a lot of things from when we were younger,” you mumble, bitterly.
he continues, dismissing your comment. “yeah well, i finally grew! i’m actually three inches taller than the average male. isn’t that crazy?”
you’re not entirely sure how to respond so that you just nod and try to give him the most sincere smile you can muster. “good for you.”
“hey, didn’t you want to take art classes when we were kids? but your parents made you do ballet instead?”
you hesitate as the memory registers in your brain. “yeah. i did, actually.”
donghyuck chuckles. “you were so mad. and then you ended up not even taking it. i’m pretty sure it was because you threw a huge tantrum outside your house.”
you titter at the embarrassing memory. “i totally forgot about that. you must have a crazy good memory.”
he shrugs. “kind of. but i think my favorite one has to be when you tried sneaking out of your bedroom window but you fell and ended up with a fractured ankle.”
your eyes dart to him. “oh my god, how do you know that? did mark tell you? because i swear if he did i’m gonna—”
“it wasn’t him.”
“then who was it?”
he suddenly becomes shy. “i, um, heard you telling your friends about it.”
“you were eavesdropping?”
he fiddles with his earring, nervously. “i guess. but i swear it wasn’t to be creepy—”
“sounds pretty creepy to me, donghyuck.”
he sighs in defeat. “i just wanted to hear your voice.”
you stumble over nothing. “i’m sorry, what?”
“you’re never around me anymore,” he says, sounding hurt. “i know you’re avoiding me. and i don’t know why. but i still try to be close to you without upsetting you. i try to meet your eyes when you pass by in the hallway, i try to go by your house as much as i can so i can catch a glimpse of you. but it never works.”
ever since mark had told you how donghyuck felt about you, you swore to yourself you would stop caring about him. although, at this moment, you can’t help but feel slightly guilty. you try to come to your senses.
“i thought i was annoying,” you mumble.
he squints his eyes. “what? who said that?”
you stop dead in your tracks. “you’re kidding right? you did! you said i was annoying and that you hated me.”
he stares off into the distance, trying to concentrate. “i really don’t remember saying that to you.”
“you didn’t. you told mark. mark told me. i never forgot it.”
“okay, i definitely didn’t say anything like that to mark. the only thing i remember telling him was—“ he stops, abruptly.
you press further. “what did you tell him, donghyuck?”
“that i had a crush on you.”
it takes you a moment to process the words that come out of his mouth. “are you messing with me?”
he scowls. “no! it took a lot of guts, i remember being so nervous to tell him. i thought he would tell you for me but i guess he said the complete opposite.”
strangely enough, you believe him. you decide to confess too. “well... i had a crush on you too.”
now it’s his turn to be stunned into silence. “seriously?”
“yes! i thought it was so obvious.”
“i would have never known.” he runs a hand through his hair. “just imagine what would have happened if mark had told either of us how the other felt. why do you think he lied about all that stuff, anyway?”
“knowing him, he couldn’t stand the thought of his little sister and best friend liking each other so he tried to keep us apart by lying and hoping we’d just forget about each other or something. what an idiot.”
“jokes on him if he thinks i would forget you. we might’ve been like 12 but i was ready to commit.”
you chuckle. “and how about now? still willing to?”
he smiles, pearly whites on display. “always.”
##bonus:
you stop at the front steps of your house, turning to donghyuck and grinning from ear to ear. “well, thanks for walking with me. i’m glad we finally got things sorted out.”
he nods. “i’ve missed you.”
you bite your lip. “i’ve missed you, too.”
he ruffles your hair. “you’re still super adorable, by the way.”
“and you’re still super—“ you run your fingers over the smooth skin of his cheeks before squeezing them. “annoying.”
he pouts. “that was mean.”
you place your hands on his shoulders. “sorry, cutie. i couldn’t help it.”
“make it up to me?”
“and how would i do that?”
“it’s just a suggestion but you could maybe put your lips on mine?”
you smile, more than happy to follow through with his instructions. as you lean in, you feel your inner little girl get the best of you. your heart speeds up and you hold your clammy hands together tightly behind his head.
“what is going on here?!”
you both jump back from each other to face mark standing in the doorway of your house. he wastes no time dashing down the stairs, coming straight for the brunette beside you.
“lee donghyuck, i’m going to strangle you!”
at hearing the pure anger in mark’s voice, donghyuck’s face drops. he presses a quick kiss to your lips. you don’t even have time to feel any form of surprise because before you can even register what was happening, he’s making a run for it with mark right behind him.
#haechan#haechan nct#lee donghyuck#donghyuck#haechan x reader#donghyuck x reader#lee donghyuck x reader#haechan fluff#haechan angst#haechan imagine#haechan imagines#donghyuck imagine#donghyuck imagines#donghyuck fluff#donghyuck angst#markhyuck#mark lee fluff#mark lee#nct fluff#nct imagines#nct dream#nct 127#jeno fluff#jaemin fluff#nct dream fluff#nct dream scenarios#nct dream reactions
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*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server
once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier
also x1000 longer than previous post
"ur satan is gnc af"
"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"
"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj
ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS
IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"
"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
"ohoho sexy"
"I am very proud of myself"
"himbo x edgy fuck"
"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"
"he has teefs"
"SQUASH"
"good for biting 📷"
"he's a himbo basically"
"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"
"bifth"
"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"
"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"
"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan"
"I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"
"crimes"
"tumblr sexyman"
"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"
"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"
"steampunk e-girl"
"steampunk tumblr sexyman"
"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"
"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"
"ARTIST SIGHTED"
"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"
"babby..... would die for him"
"honestly i probably kin him"
"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"
"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"
"Also :00 blonde friend"
"Let us all infodhmo"
"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"
"Nix woukd you like to joon?
"skitters away"
"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"
"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"
"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"
"Awkwardly watches in band kid"
"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"
"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"
"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"
"anyway heres my boi"
"emo"
"haha emo"
"virgil sanders kinnie"
"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"
"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"
"bird man my beloved"
"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"
"Birds!!"
"guiguhuh"
"crabrave"
"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"
"yess name collector gang"
"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"
"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"
"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"
"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"
"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"
"My dad has seven legal names"
"bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"
"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"
"mmmmmm magic man :]"
"°0° green man"
"criminal (affectionate)"
"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"
"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"
"i would commit so many crimes for him"
"Very babey"
"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"
"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"
"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)
"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"
"* or extremly chaotic either works"
"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"
"oH--"
"bc my brain has a schedule"
"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"
"hehe yes spooky man"
"my ghost glucose guardian"
"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"
"ghosts r just inherently sexy"
"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"
"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"
"ł â m p"
"łæmp"
"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"
"I'd date a ghost"
"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"
"p e e p e e"
""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"
"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"
"you're all 12 year olds"
"PEENIE"
"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"
"god, what a himbo. i love him"
"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"
"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"
"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"
"im kin assigning him roman sanders"
""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""
"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"
"twink appreciation club"
"give us the twinks"
"my first thought was bottom-"
"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"
"daddy issued"
"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"
"Big boy but"
"anyways janus is swagggg"
"........................."
"gib twink"
"give twink then i will share"
"holds him gentle like hamburger"
"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"
"he is. fragile creachur"
"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"
"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"
"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"
"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"
"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"
"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"
"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."
"note i am a lesbian"
"You may like Schezo wegey"
"why does he have one single expression"
"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"
"magic wand"
"I Want To Hold His Hand"
"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"
"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""
"p e a n u t"
"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"
"grug from the croods is peak male performance"
"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."
"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"
"i like essays"
"central time gang"
"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)
"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"
"points were made"
"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"
"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"
"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"
"i think it sounds great
i'm going to start eating like that"
"several people are typing"
"do these look edible to you"
"forbidden gummies"
"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"
"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"
"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"
"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"
"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"
"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"
"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."
"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."
"NIIICE"
"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"
"watch your fucking language in front of the president"
"im so sorry lumi"
"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"
"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"
"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"
""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""
"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"
"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."
"me on discord: nick wilde"
"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."
"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"
"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"
"what the fuck"
"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"
"If you adopt me then yes"
"am I qualified for dad jokes???"
"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"
"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""
"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"
"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"
"cat pet"
"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"
"maybe thats me being a coward tho"
"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"
if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content
#tw drugs#tw swearing#tw cannibalism#tw crime#tw food#tw homophobia#shitpost#out of context#out of context quotes#lumi's quotes
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do u !!! have any character theme songs for the troop boys? Like any songs you think really fits them (and why u think it fits)?
THATS A GREAT QUESTION!!
Before I get into it Im going to plug this collaborative Troop Playlist on Spotify, feel free to add onto it!! Continuing with my picks
I think a lot of the songs I associate with The Troop in general are just because I happened to listen to them around the same time I got into the book in the first place (So they could only be tangentially related BUT only if you squint hard)
Example: Drunk by The Living Tombstone, cant really tie it into the story but in my mind its linked
Some better, more fitting songs under the cut (Side note its LONGGG IM SORRY... Also its all YouTube links because some of these arent on Spotify :'^()
Disclaimer -Like 95% of my choices arent really a "These lyrics match up exactly 1 to 1" but more of an overall "the vibe/general idea its trying to capture lines up" type thing. If that makes sense.
Its Alright by Jack Stauber: Kind of self explanatory, I think its a perfect song for these guys. From "It's alright, I'm here, Everything's alright, Feels weird but calm, I wanna hear It's alright" to the whole sound of it- its all great. Equal parts distressing and sad with an almost eerie calmness to it. Despite it all theyre gonna be alright, right?
The Second Little Piggy by Worthikids: Another one that I think is sort of self explanatory- at least with the chorus. "If my brain turns to mush, If the shit hits the fan, Will you be my friend?" Kind of the falling apart of everything, specifically their relationships, in light of the incident.
Poor George by James Supercave: Another case of "listened to at the same time I read the book" BUT I was actually making a Troop PMV script with that song. I never finished it but maybe Ill revisit it... just for you
Cold Summer by Le Matos ft Computer Magic: I dont even think this takes place in the summer but the VIBES and also it came from Summer of 84, which is another good piece of murder boy media.
Treehouse by Alex G ft Emily Yacina: This is a Eef and Max type of song because they are bffs and thats final. Basic song because Im not creative, but I think its a nice heart to heart theyd have (with Eef doing the talking)
Fifteen Minuets by Nick Krol: On the flipside heres a song that goes with Eef and Maxs friendship fracturing, once again more from Eefs side than Maxs. THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTINGGG
As far as songs for the boys as individuals hmmm thats a good one that I havent thought about as much...
MAX
+ The Ghosts by The Real Tuesday Weld: That survivors guilt... lyrics arent like a perfect match but I think it gets that sort of hollow feeling across. Hes haunted man...
+ Final Girl by Electric Youth: Ok its a little funny because har har Final Girl Trope but I mean HE IS ONE. ANd dont look at me its a nice song- "Others were gone, and you kept going on, You know they never really noticed, you were always different, One by one, They're all done, And you're the last one standing"
+ Going Grazy by Lonesome Wyatt and the Holy Spooks: HONESTLY this could go for all the characters but Im tagging it onto Max because hes the one who has to deal with the aftermath of losing everyone (sorry survivors guilt Max again </3) "Everyone's saying my mind is unsound, 'Cause I always see you when you aren't around" "They're gonna wrap me in a jacket of white, And lock me away in a room without light" is what cements it as a Max song for me
EEF
+ The Existential Threat by Sparks: Once again starting sad, I link this one specifically to his paranoia about the worms- especially with lines like "Can't they see the existential threat is on its way". Kind of exasperated no one else can see the danger (he thinks) hes in.
+ Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother: I know I know its basic but I cant help it!!! Eef anger issues arc we are shaking hands me too
+ Haunted by Laura Les: Eef struggles with people seeing him as "just like his father" and I think we can get some good angst out of this track if we keep that in mind. Especially the back half of the song with lyrics like "Do you think I'm frightening?" and "Mirrors shatter when I'm passing, broken glass and crashing" since he is just a reflection of his dad (to others at least). Also song good.
KENT
+ Goodbye Mr A by The Hoosiers: Mfw the disillusionment with authority sets in. I think the vibe fits when he had that little epiphany about how adults are fucked- not perfect but it gets the idea across me thinks.
+ I'm Gonna Win by Rob Cantor: Ties into his need to "win" aka be the best at everything, be in charge, all that jazz! Hell do whatever it takes to be successful, even if it hurts. That was a little emo
+ Toba the Tura by Forgive Durden ft Chris Conley: Not to be emo again but "They say you're gifted, well I just see a scared kid. They must have flipped it, your skills are latent. O, you snuffed the glow. Replaced it with coals. Threw away the throne... This mess that you've made, it's a six-foot grave. It's a home for your lonesome bones that remain. We'll disappear, but you'll stay here to rot" AND SO ON AND SO FOURTH representing his fall after it was revealed he was sick. He was referred to as "the uncrowned king" and was on top of the world but then POOF that all crumbled and it was made out that he basically deserved what happened to him. It would be fun to make a pmv of him with this song (Simplifying my thoughts a bit because Ive already written a LOT)
NEWT
+ I Earn My Life by Lemon Demon: Ok a little Kentcore but Im actually having a hard time coming up with songs for Newton so here we are, they can share. Newt existential crisis moment time I guess
+ Know How by The Crane Wives: POV Newt struggles with going through with the plans he makes to keep everyone safe (stopping Max from touching Kent, going back into the cabin, etc) "I am not brave, I am not brave, I keep my focus on what is safe, You drew a line, made up your mind, And now I'm struggling to realize" And also maybe struggling with his place in the group and as a person in general- all that living through his cousin thing. "I gotta wrap my head around, What my heart is telling me, I've been trying to drown it out, Just because I know what I am, I am supposed to do now, Doesn't mean I know, Doesn't mean I know how"
+ On The Outside by Oingo Boingo: Idk man. Hes on the outside lookin in!! Loner nerd!! Its ok though, we still love him
SHEL
+ Bad Blood by Creature Feature: The lyrics speak for themselves: "I can guarantee I will do evil things, The only way that you can stop me now, Is if you put me in the ground, Somewhere I'll never be found"
+ Frontier Psychologist by The Avalanches: Hinges on the fact that the principal or whoever was like "Your sons a freak" and Shels mom was like "HES PERFECTLY FINE" while Shelley was like dismembering an animal or something
+ Johnny by American Murder Song: The songs good but theres this ONE LYRIC that sucks so the link provided is an edited version and also a lovely Warriors oc video I think you should all enjoy and support <3 Anyway Shel would be Johnny I could see this song being a scene in the book. Field trip to Shels house and they find his murder garden
If anyone wants more for Im not opposed to making another post :^)
#SORRY THIS TOOK A BIT#I had to use my brainpower and I am very easily distracted#max kirkwood#ephraim elliot#kent jenks#newton thornton#shelley longpre#the troop#the troop nick cutter
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Never Go Home Again, Pt. I || JJ Maybanks x Reader
Words: 2667
Series Warnings: violence / talking about abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes sex tapes and sex tapes / drugs / underage drinking
Pt. Warnings: self harm (kind of?)
Series Summary: A new girl, a shoebox of old memories, a past she’s trying to forget coincide with a hotheaded, but selfless, boy. teenagers getting in way over their heads
Pt. Summary: the second time she saw him, it was at a kook party.
A/N: Okay so I KNOW i havent finished WB (im not even halfway lol) but i got this idea from rewatching euphoria. you dont have to look too closely to see that ive mirrored a couple of seens, but the plot, while inspired by euphoria, wont be the same. let me know what you think, or if you wanna be tagged!
Chapters linked in my masterlist.
“masterlist”
This story does follow the plot, so beware of any spoilers.
This town seemed too perfect. Sure, you were on the poor side of the town, but the houses were well kept and everyone was happy and friendly. It was as far from home as you could get. You hated this. The boxes stacked up in the boot, and the bags piled up in the seats behind you. The fact that you were over two and half thousand miles away from home. The fact that this was a new beginning you were sure you didn’t need.
You watched as people loaded boats with shopping bags or crates of beer, and how they all seemed to be happy with their small roles in this small town. It was everything you hated and more.
You looked at your dad, in the seat next to you. He kept his eyes on the road, glancing down while he tried to find a radio station with decent music. He settled on reggae track by Bob Marley, and hummed along. You rolled your window down, smelling the salty air that blew in from the coast even as you wound your way further into the poor housing of this end of the island.
That was when you saw him.
He was on his bike, no helmet, his longish blonde hair waving around his face, and a baseball cap slung backwards over his head. You drove past, pushing your head out of the window to keep the view, and his eyes found yours in a way you couldn’t describe. You held his gaze until the car turned, pulling into a driveway. Your new house.
Your dad turned to you with a long sigh.
“I know you’re not happy about this.” he started, and you looked at his concerned face.
“I just don’t understand how moving almost three thousand miles will change anything.” you reasoned.
“Well, you know why. She’s not here, and you won’t have to deal with all of that shit that happened at school.”
“So we’re running away?”
“Y/N, just give this place a chance.”
You nodded. “Dad, how can we afford this?”
He looked at you defeatedly.
You continued, “I mean, with the divorce, and what she did, how could we afford the moving fees and the house? Cross-state moving fees are mad, let alone when you’re on an island too.”
“Hey,” he shook his head, “I’m the adult, I’ll worry about that.”
In your first week on the island, you made friends with a girl called Sarah. She was from Figure 8, but had explained the dynamics between the pogues and kooks to you, and invited you to a party. It was her boyfriend, Topper’s, but she explained that plenty of pogues and tourons would crash anyway.
You arrived without her, a pair of cycling shorts and a crop top thrown over your bikini in a minimal-effort kind of way. Your one stab at an effort was the blue and purple glitter dabbed over your cheek bone to recreate a highlighter effect. When you got there, you could immediately tell you were underdressed. Everyone else were in shirts and dresses, and your glitter was definitely too ‘city’ to be cool here, so you stuck out, obviously the only pogue there. You spent twenty minutes trying to find Sarah, picking up some vodka on your way around.
Eventually, after leaving a few texts, you sat down on the kitchen counter and nursed your vodka. You had no idea how long you sat there for, but at some point, Sarah’s brother stormed in. You recognised him from one of Sarah’s instagram posts, but you knew he’d never seen you in person. He looked high. And angry.
“Get out of the fucking kitchen!” he was yelling, and people began to filter out, but due to your obscured path, you couldn’t get out. He turned on you.
“Who the fuck are you?” he demanded, “‘Cause I don’t fucking know you!”
“Uh,” you mumbled, “I’m Y/N, I got invited by a friend.”
Where the fuck was Sarah?
“Well I don’t know any Y/Ns. And I don’t see any fucking friends!” He yelled, slurring and stumbling. “Does anybody know Y/N?”
You looked around the gathering crowd, trying to spot Sarah, hoping she would appear and get you out of this.
“I said, does anybody fucking know Y/N? What the fuck are you doing in this house?” He cornered you, and you were beginning to panic. How the fuck do I get out of this situation?
You didn’t even realise what you were doing, but you felt yourself grab a knife from the counter and thrust it towards him. He stumbled back and you stepped forwards.
“Don’t fucking yell at me!” you shouted, watching him lean back against the wall in fear. You didn’t even register doing it but you felt the blade slice your arm.
You stepped back, addressing the shocked audience. “By the way, I’m Y/N,” You looked around, finding those blue eyes you’d seen a week ago. “And I just moved here.”
You dropped the knife on the counter and pushed your way out of the house, pulling your phone out when you got to the pavement. You checked your messages with Sarah.
You: just got here, where r u?
You: girl, where u at?
You: sarah, i dont know anyone, where r u?
You: im going home, shit turned sour. Msg me later.
Putting your phone away, you looked around. You hardly knew where you were, and you were desperate to get home.
“That was quite a show.” You heard a voice behind you. Shit.
You turned, and saw your blonde haired boy. “Well I knew someone was gonna get hurt either way, so I chose to deescalate the situation, you know?”
He nodded, reaching for your arm, looking at the cut. “You need to get that looked at.”
“You offering?” you asked, pushing down a smile.
“Sure.” he shrugged. You looked at him. He looked at the ground, an uncharacteristic shyness taking him over, “Can I stay at yours?”
You watched him stare at the ground, and however much you wanted to ask, you chose not to. “Sure, we just gotta be extra quiet.”
He grinned, “‘Course.”
“Okay,” you sighed, “This is where I confess that I don’t actually know my way home.”
“We’ll work it out.” he grinned.
When you reached your house, learning that it was only a minute down the road from the blonde boy’s friend's house, you opened the door as quietly as possible, the pair of you pulling off your shoes and carrying them for extra quiet. You snuck up the stairs, trying to avoid the creaky stair boards, and pausing in terror every time there was a creak. By the time you’d made it to your room, the only other room upstairs being a bathroom, you both relaxed. You searched your moving boxes, finding your brother’s old sweat and tee for him, and going to the bathroom so that you could change into an oversized top and old gym shorts.
When you came back, a first aid kit in hand, the boy sat you down on the bed and began to address the cut.
You watched him work in silence. “What’s your name?” you whispered, and he glanced up at you, a smile on his lips.
“JJ.” he said simply, a small smirk adorning his lips as he finished dressing your arm.
You flopped down, so that you were lying on your back in the bed, and he looked at you with an odd sense of curiosity. “Lie down.” softly, you coaxed.
“Usually I get to know a girl before I get in her bed.” he joked, and the way you laughed made him want to freeze the moment in time.
“Why do I feel like that’s not true?” you snarked.
He gasped, putting his hand to his chest in feigned hurt, “Oh Y/N, I’ve known you for an hour and you’re already breaking my heart!”
“What can I say?” you bantered, “I’m just pure femme fatale.”
He crawled onto the bed, resting his head on the pillows above you. “Oh,” he replied, “I’m sure.”
You flipped onto your stomach, looking at him, relaxed, head on the pillows, gazing down at you. “At home, there weren’t any guys like you.”
He laughed, unsure of himself, “Love, there aren’t any other guys like me.”
You hummed, fiddling with the corner of your throw blanket, looking at him through your lashes, you giggled. “You’re so full of shit.”
He grabbed a pillow and threw it straight at your head. You picked it up, your face scrunched up from the impact, and he laughed. You sat up, crossing your legs, and threw it back at his face, only he caught, laughing, saying something about you having a bad throw. He put the pillow back, and you crawled back up the bed, lying on your back, your arms touching as you both stared at the ceiling.
You glanced at him, taking how his warm tan contrasted the blue light of the moon that shone through the large window above your bed. You took in the way his muscles gave him definition, and how the top stretched slightly over his chest, and how his long blonde hair splayed over the pillow, your own, waist-length hair tickling his arm as you lay there. You took in the curve of his nose and the tiny, mischievous smirk that never seemed to leave his face. You took in his long eyelashes and the blue of his eyes and the pink of his cheeks.
At some point, you drifted off.
When you woke up, you were tucked into him, your legs tangled in his, hair spread over his arm. His eyes were still closed, and you didn’t move from your spot, keeping your eyes on his face.
“You know,” he murmured, “If you take a picture, it’d last longer.”
Blushing, you pulled away. “I don’t know what you’re on about.” you sat up, feeling his fingers trace the curve of your back as you moved out of his reach. You left the bed, looking back to see him sit up, rubbing sleep out of his eyes, and you watched him take in the way your top fell over your frame. You searched your moving boxes again, looking for an outfit for the day. You really needed to move everything into the wardrobe. Eventually, you pulled out a bikini and shorts. You looked back at him, and he grinned at you.
You looked at him curiously, “What are you doing today, JJ?”
He thought for a second, electing against going home, but rather to go to John B’s for a day of weed and joking around. “Introducing you to my friends.” he shrugged, “The one who lives a minute down the road.”
You nodded, “What are we, in a relationship?” you joked, “Introducing me to your friends? Next thing I know I’ll be round for dinner.”
He felt dirty when you said that, shrinking into himself, hoping that you would never experience the shit that came with meeting his dad. You must have realised you’d hit a nerve, because you backtracked, saying you’d been stupid and whatever you’d said to upset him wasn’t intentional. When he looked back up, he saw how the tears of worry were building, and he immediately changed his demeanor, rushing forwards to hug you, assured you that it was all good.
You went to get changed, leaving him in your room.
He looked around. The corner was full of boxes yet to be unpacked, the open ones mainly clothes. There was a desk under the window, with some makeup, a book and a notebook thrown on top. The wardrobe doors were open, revealing that the few clothes that were in your wardrobe were very messily so, most either hung up or on the floor. There was a shelf above the hangers, with a shoebox pushed carefully to the side. He pulled it out, conscious that he was snooping. He pulled the lid off, and saw a set of pictures.
The first - you at a funfair when you were a little, a boy two years older (must be your brother) and a woman, almost identical to you, hugging you close. The second, you were older, perhaps twelve - you were wearing a Christmas onesie that matched the woman’s, your brother and dad laughing as you and the woman - your mother - danced around. The third - you were in a hospital gown, and your mother was crying, holding you close.
There were more, but he didn’t look. Under the photos, there was a tiny crocheted rabbit and a baby blanket with little elephants on it. He heard your bathroom door open, and rushed to put the lid on, putting the box back. You walked in, smiling at him as you checked your phone.
Dad missed calls (6)
Bro missed calls (3)
Sarah missed calls (11)
You sighed, checking Sarah’s messages.
Sarah: Sorry!! I heard what happened, i should hv been there. Meet up 2day?
You: Rain check? I met a guy last night and he wants to introduce me to his mates.
Sarah: U go girl!! Enjoy urself, msg me if u need me <3
You flicked off Sarah’s messages, glancing back at JJ, who was looking at your make up.
Mom: Darling, call me when you can.
The last text made you want to throw up, and you tossed your phone on the bed, drawing JJ’s attention back to you. “You okay?” he asks, and you nod, grabbing your purse and picking your phone back up, and getting ready to go.
“Okay, I’ll go down first, I’ll signal if there’s no one there so you can come down.” you ran down the stairs, checking the kitchen and living room, then giving JJ the all-clear. You left the house, letting him walk you to his friend’s place.
He took your hand, guiding your through the front door and into the house. You wrinkled your nose at the mess, food, clothes and empty cans littering the room. “This is a mess.” you muttered, stepping over an empty packet of sweets.
“His mom left when he was three and his dad’s missing, the lack of adults means… well, you can see what it means.”
You nodded, only just noticing a boy asleep on the sofa next to you. JJ leans over, sighing. “That’s Pope, I’ll go get John B and see if Kiara’s here.” he let go of your hand, walking down the hall, leaving you with the sleeping boy. You watched the boy shuffle and then open his eyes, jumping at the sight of a stranger standing over him.
“Who are you?” he asked, sitting up and staring at you.
“JJ’s friend.” you said, and he raised an eyebrow.
“You’re the girl who cut herself.” he said, recognition relaxing his features.
“My reputation precedes me.” you laugh, and he stands up.
“Food?” he offers, walking to the kitchen.
“Y’all have food here? It looks like you live off Swedish Fish and beer.”
He grins, “That’s the life.” he jokes, pulling a slice of moldy bread from its packet, and then throwing it straight in the bin. “That said, John B does need to get groceries more.”
“I do?” you heard a voice behind you. You turned, and were met with the sight of a tall brunette boy. He stares at you for a second, and rather than Pope’s blunt recollection, he grins, “You’re Y/N, right?” You nod, “You left quite the impression at Topper’s party.”
“What can I say?” you laughed.
JJ came back from the hallway, accompanied by a girl. “You must be Y/N!” she greets, smiling brightly, “I’m Kiara.”
“Well…” JJ pipes up, “Let's take the HMS out to the marsh and introduce Y/N to the OBX properly!”
“I’m down.” Kiara shrugged, “I don’t have any shifts today.”
“Sure,” agreed Pope.
“Leave in twenty?” John B offered.
#obx#obx fanfic#obx fanfiction#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#outer banks fanfic#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank x you#jj maybank x y/n#jj x reader#jj x you#jj x y/n#john b#john b routledge#kiara#kiara carrera#pope#pope heyward#sarah#sarah cameron
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I posted 2,477 times in 2021
291 posts created (12%)
2186 posts reblogged (88%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 7.5 posts.
I added 1,527 tags in 2021
#spn - 763 posts
#dean winchester - 159 posts
#sam winchester - 117 posts
#destiel - 99 posts
#supernatural - 77 posts
#my own post - 76 posts
#castiel - 73 posts
#mcu - 57 posts
#winchesters - 55 posts
#secret good spn - 51 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#i saw a post that was like ‘oh dean wouldn’t even think before sacrificing cas to save sam actually sam would feel worse about it than dean
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
also yeah i know the reason why kevin has two different people playing his mom is because they replaced the actress but also. consider the idea that he has two moms
82 notes • Posted 2021-03-14 18:04:45 GMT
#4
When Sam’s community rallied around him and the Wilson family!!! THEE moment that was what made me cry like a little bitch
135 notes • Posted 2021-04-16 12:38:25 GMT
#3
In the secret good spn that lives in my head, Sam is played by a woman and is a lesbian. She’s closeted though and introduces Jess to dean as her “roommate” and a lot of the first season is spent with dean and the audience wondering why Sam is so fucked up by her friend’s death and we get like quite a few flashback scenes where Jess and Sam are getting close but not yet super gay and it gets revealed to the audience (maybe not dean yet?? Idk) with the Sarah Blake episode because she’s the first girl Sam allows herself to get close to after Jess. Like maybe Sarah is one of the first people Sam comes out to (would be even more buck wild if MEG was the first person Sam came out to) Anyway when Sam and Dean finally catch up to John and they get into an argument over going after the demon, That’s when Sam comes out to John and Dean. Thinking something like John saying “you don’t know what it’s like to have the love of your life taken from you, killing this demon takes precedent over everything because revenge” and Sam going “no! I do know exactly what it feels like because that’s exactly what I went through with Jess because I loved her! I loved Jess and she’s dead and I can’t get her back but I’m not gonna sacrifice what’s left of the people I love in order to get revenge” like revealing it in this huge burden relieving way bc over the season with dean she’s been able to slowly let go of the closet door, been able to relax about her attraction and relationships with women, but meeting back with John slams the door closed and she’s like Fuck That I’m not gonna let anyone talk to me like my relationships don’t mean anything. It’s important that she’s able to come out to John because I keep imagining that later in season 2 she and dean have a talk which is basically dean saying that he wishes he had been able to stand up to John like she had, to say His truth (this is all while he’s refusing to look at her he just can’t) and just chdhfhfjjd sam and dean gay feelings. Also sam still gets mad pussy there’s no stopping her
146 notes • Posted 2021-01-11 22:03:52 GMT
#2
Dean after chopping off his mark of cain arm and continuing to hunt: hey monster why u running I’m ‘armless hahahaha *commits a horrifying murder but it’s okay now bc he dialled back his homicidal rages by 2%*
600 notes • Posted 2021-04-13 09:29:55 GMT
#1
i think about kevin tran so much u guys don’t even know....i really wanna write a fic about him being the prophet from the start instead of chuck and he’s just like a teenager writing about these visions of these two random whites who hunt monsters on tumblr or reddit or whatever until someone comments “are you seriously writing rpf about the serial killer duo sam and dean winchester” and hes just like WHAT THEYRE REAL IVE BEEN SEEING THEM IN FREAKY ASS VISIONS AND DREAMS and nobody believes him bc ppl lie on the internet
5827 notes • Posted 2021-03-03 16:02:08 GMT
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Group Ask 183
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Please send us an ask stating which group ask and which person you are replying to. Thank you so much in advance!
Anon 1 said:
Hi, can you help me find this fic, it’s pre serum Stucky, little Steve was very sick and someone tells Bucky Steve is going to die so he runs to Steve’s home crying, that’s all I remember. I’ve been looking for it for on the and can’t find it. :(
at6am said:
hello! ive been looking for this fic for the longest time, looked through every tag and i fear it has been removed :/ basically, bucky is “hiding” from an abusive ex. he finds him and confronts him, but steve sees him while hes on a run, and chases him off. he invites bucky to stay at his place to protect him. i remember steve being military. at the end, the boyfriend finds him and has a fight with bucky, where he breaks his jaw, but then steve arrives and shoots him, i think. help :(
Anon 2 said:
hii, I have a question, I'm looking for a fic! What I know about it, is that they are in some kind of sex club? Steve is a Dom, Bucky a Sub. Bucky thinks Steve is too nice and gentle and unexperienced at first and unintentionly makes fun of him, Steve doesn't take his shit and takes him into the dungeons, where only the most experienced Doms can go? I think it was even Nats club, or sum like that. Thanks so much already!!
Anon 3 said:
love y'all to bits. mwah x. i was wondering if u guys know abt a fic where steve n bucky are in avengers tower, slow dancing (i think the rest of the gang are there but not necessarily watching them?) and either steve or bucky gets super emotional bc they're pining and run out w/ the other following ??
Anon 4 said:
I've been trying to find a fic for hours but I cant remember the name of it. I remember that it was a modern au, bucky and steve were roommates or something, and whenever bucky cried, he only cried a single tear. They kissed at a christmas or new years party, but bucky ran away when steve didnt kiss back. Also, the author always refered to the space between the living room and kitchen as "no man's land", dont know why that certain detail stuck out at me. Pls help and thanks!
thefrenchfern said:
Hello! First of all many thanks for your wonderful work, your blog is so useful to find recommandations!! I am looking for a fic,where Bucky is working as a tailor (with Natasha) and he is also writing books under an alias. Steve is working nearby (in a gym maybe?) and he reads Bucky's book and he puts updates on goodreads? I also remember something about post it wirtten by Bucky to make Steve know its him. Many thanks for your help
Anon 5 said:
Hi, I feel like I have been looking for this fic forever everywhere. In it Bucky comes to Avengers Tower post Winter Soldier. He is recovering but he realizes Steve is lost too, and none of the other Avengers seem to realize. He starts gently bossing Steve around. He has Steve get his 40’s haircut back and Bucky buys 40’s style clothes for Steve to wear. They buy a farm and move out there, adopting a dog. Bucky gets set off by a trigger word and hides in the barn. Please help! Thank you!
Anon 6 said:
I lost a shrunkyclunks fic where Bucky meets Steve on the subway (or bus?) and they become fast friends, but Steve has a lot of money and Bucky is poor so every time they go out somewhere Bucky doesn't want to mention that he really can't afford to do much of anything. That's all I remember, do you know which fic I'm talking about? Thank youuuu
Anon 7 said:
Hi, desperate for some help here. I can only remember this one really specific detail from a fic I read recently, Steve asked Bucky something he'd never told anyone before, Bucky said he had Becca's kid for a weekend (?) and he said his first word at Bucky's place (the word had something to do with an ad on tv and was a pretty unusual first word), he never told Becca. Becca called Bucky a week later saying he did it again. Thanks for any help!!
artisticrogers1972 said:
I was reading a wonderful STUCKY fic; linked here from A03 and have lost it. This was maybe two-three days ago. It was about Bucky and Steve from the time they were kids on up and Bucky's mom was Roma. Bucky was in love with Steve but thought if he went with girls he'd be fine. They'd push beds together in the winter. Someone, please help!! I want to finish. It's part of a series and my head, with all the migraines, is easily forgetting titles
celestial-star-petals said:
Hello I'm looking for a fic that's post winter soldier I think. Bucky surrenders himself over to SHIELD and fury and maria have him imprisoned at headquarters but no one tells Steve, who, when he finds out immediately goes to him. Bucky doesn't leave so Steve visits as often as possible and so do the other avengers, sam, nat, pepper too. tony comes along tinkers with something in buckys cell and drops something that later helps bucky escape. Thank you for your help!!
cevansebb said:
hi guys do you know that fic (i rhink its recovery!bucky post tws fic) where bucky is OBSESSED with steve’s cowlick? if you could find it i’d appreciate it alot thank you!
Anon 8 said:
hi! i’m looking for a post-cacw fic where before helping bucky, wanda gives steve trigger words which makes bucky freak out, but then she takes them away. do you guys happen to know it? thanks :)
harrieserendipity said:
Hello stuckylibrary friends 🥰 I just went through a few of your tags looking for a fic that takes place pre-war. It’s summer& really hot out so Steve& Bucky have to sleep outside on their balcony/deck to keep cool overnight. Bucky wakes up w Steve asleep on top of him & like throws him off. It’s a prewar pining sort of thing I believe, but I went through that entire tag. I also know that this fic isn’t August and her sons, I thought it was but I just reread it and it’s not. Thanks friends!❤️
Anon 9 said:
hi! im pretty sure this was a pretty popular fic but i can't find it even with ao3 tags. it's post ca:ws steve+bucky w/ the avengers and one mission goes wrong and steve nearly dies and bucky confesses his feelings in panic but once he realizes that everyone heard him b/c the coms were still on, he dips and completely avoids steve?? i love y'all to bits, i hope you guys have been safe and healthy
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