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creedslove · 8 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/creedslove/729946757120851968/as-a-angst-lover-an-idea-came-to-my-mind-last?source=share

Dude can you make a part two where Pena trying to catch guiterez because he's a drug dealer boss? Or something like that? (I know it actually his cousin and not him) but reader choosing to stay with guiterez no matter what pena told reader or how dangerous it is for her?

Javier Peña x f!reader x Javi Gutierrez

A/N: babe, I wasn't going to write it, but now I am and it's thanks to you because your idea is genius and I love you bai

• PART TWO OF THIS HEADCANON

• Peña wasn't able to sleep that night, he had gone home after running into you and your knew boyfriend at the bar, the same bar he used to go with you for date nights, the same bar he kissed another girl and you'd walked on them, it was almost a symbolism and it made him feel so conflicted about it all

• of course there was the jealousy, over the time he spent away from you he had realized he missed you way too much, more than he ever thought he would, and then he realized the mistake he had made; but it was too late, he knew you were happy but he was still jealous

• he tried to leave the place incognito, but he got so agitated to see you kissing your new guy, he ended up bumping into a water, making a serious of glasses hit the floor and shatter and with the noise, your attention towards him also came

• you two exchanged a silent look, you were too shocked to say anything, at the same time Javier just swallowed before mumbling the water some quick apologies and left

• he couldn't even think of being around you and that man; he felt stupid for letting you go, he also felt sad and angry, why did you have to move on from him so fast? you were like a puppy around him, it wasn't fair you had moved on while Javier got stuck in his feelings for you, no matter how selfish that was

• however, there was something else he couldn't get a hold of but it was bothering him; Javier overhead someone calling your new boyfriend 'Javi' and under normal circumstances he would say it was pathetic you dated a guy with the same name as him

• but he had seen that Javi guy somewhere, he knew it and though he didn't understand where, his cop gut feeling told him something was up

• just when Javi was going over some police files, he found what he was looking for: the unfinished investigation on the Gutierrez family; Lucas and Javi Gutierrez were the suspects of ruling the drug trafficking market in Spain

• he didn't know what Javi was doing there but he didn't like you were so close to him one bit, it wasn't right, you shouldn't be associated with someone like him, it was dangerous and immoral

• he grabbed all the files he could get and drove straight to your apartment, hoping you would still be living there

• when the doorbell rang and you opened the door to see Javier Peña, your ex boyfriend, you were surprised to say the least

• of course it had to do with the fact he had seen you with another man, you just didn't know Javier was that petty

"is he here? Your boyfriend? Gutierrez?"

"what? Why? Why do you even care?"

• Javi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, then he held you by the arms and made you sit down on the couch

"listen to me, you are in danger with him, your boyfriend... Gutierrez, he's part of one of the most prominent families in the drug cartel, they're very powerful and you should step away from him immediately"

"what are you talking about? Why do you even care? Javi is a great guy, he would never do this, it's his cousin who's in charge, not him, he's got nothing to do with that shit"

"what? You know about that all?"

"do you think I'm really stupid to think all that money comes from olives planting, selling or whatever? Of course I know, but I don't care, Javi has nothing to do with it and I won't break up with him"

"are you telling me you're staying with him even if you know his family is in the shady business, do you even know how dangerous this is?!"

"I do and I love Javi, he's not involved with that, he's a wonderful man and you can quit your worried act right now, I don't care what you say"

"you gotta be fucking crazy, you can't be serious! I'm telling you they're part of a drug cartel! I'm worried about you and your safety, goddammit!"

"no, you aren't worried about me, if anything, you are just jealous and butthurt I got over you and found love with someone else, someone better than you, a man who treats me just like I deserve it, who loves me and makes sure to show me! He doesn't use me for sex like you did, he treats me like a queen and that's why I'm marrying him and staying by his side, supporting Javi no matter what happens while you're probably going to die alone, Peña, because you don't love anyone else but yourself!"

• after your words, Javi had no other business to do around you. He just gathered the files and turned his back to you, walking away; no words, no goodbyes, you were right, he was incapable of loving someone else, but he was right to be worried about you, however, it wasn't his duty to save you from yourself and the consequences of your actions

____

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discordantwords · 5 months

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20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @khorazir and @raina-at. Thanks so much for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 47 (how is it that many?!) 29 for BBC Sherlock 18 for The X-Files

2. What's your total A03 word count? 897,533

3. What fandoms do you write for? Currently only BBC Sherlock

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

(Never) Turn Your Back to the Sea

White Knight

Incidents with Dogs, Curious and Otherwise

Another Auld Lang Syne

The Dead Detective

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I try to! I'm not always the best at keeping up, especially lately as my schedule has been erratic and I can only steal a few minutes here and there for fandom activities. But even when I don't have a chance to reply, I do read and treasure each and every comment.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I guess maybe The Pillar upon which England Rests has the saddest ending of anything that I've ever written, but I don't really consider it a sad story. It's set immediately post Reichenbach, told mostly through flashbacks as Mrs Hudson shares the story of how she met Sherlock with John. Sherlock is still "dead" when the story comes to a close, and John and Mrs Hudson are both grieving, though we as the reader know their loss is temporary.

I have a few shorter fics with ambiguous endings that lean in the angsty direction:

Nothing Happened in Belarus deals with accidental time travel, with grief-stricken S4 Sherlock finding himself briefly in the care of S1 John. Alas, the reprieve is a short one, as neither Sherlock nor John become aware of what is happening in time to take advantage of the opportunity.

At the end of Leaves Sherlock and John have either triumphed over the hallucinogenic vines that have invaded 221B… or they haven't. (I have my own theory, but you are free to interpret the ending however you choose.)

In EXECUTE John inadvertently deletes Mary from existence. He gets his happy ending, but has to live with the uncomfortable knowledge of the choices he's made.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Most of my fics have happy or at least hopeful endings. I like leaving the boys in a good place. I guess it depends on the flavor of happy you're looking for. But I'd say that these are probably the happiest:

(Never) Turn Your Back to the Sea

Inscrutable to the Last

White Knight

Another Auld Lang Syne

Whirlwind

8. Do you get hate on fics? Thankfully, no. A few weird comments here and there, but nothing too bad. The vast majority of my interaction with others in the fandom has been absolutely wonderful.

9. Do you write smut? Most of my sex scenes stay in R rated territory. But I tend to roll with whatever the plot demands of me.

10. Do you write crossovers? I've done quite a few fusion fics, but not crossovers. Crossovers aren't usually my cup of tea.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Once, sort of, but I don't believe it was done maliciously and I don't wish to call attention to it.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! I'm always flattered by requests to translate my writing.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? A friend and I used to write together quite a bit in high school, but nothing that has made it out into the world.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? Sherlock & John and Mulder & Scully.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Crime Writer is a Sherlock/Knight Rider fusion that ran out of steam a while back (although it was intended to be episodic and IMO doesn't feel too horribly unresolved where it ends, so don't let the unfinished nature of it put you off if you're inclined to read it).

I'm still optimistic about most of the WIPs in my WIP folder, heh. I guess we'll see what next year brings.

16. What are your writing strengths? I like to think I'm good at writing complicated people with complicated feelings that don't always resolve neatly.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I don't think my smut is particularly inspired. And I have a very hard time writing fluff or domestic situations without having some angst to drive the plot.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I personally wouldn't attempt it. I'm not fluent in any other languages and there's far too much nuance to leave in the hands of Google Translate. :)

19. First fandom you wrote for? X-Files! (Unless you count unrefined and unposted scribblings from my younger years, I definitely went through a phase where I was trying to fix the Terminator time loop in a way that allowed Sarah Connor and Kyle Reese to live happily ever after.)

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? Oh, this is always such a hard question to answer. The Pillar upon Which England Rests is the first fic I wrote for the Sherlock fandom, so it has a special place in my heart. I'm really proud of the cases and complex plot in Out There. (Never) Turn Your Back to the Sea is the one that seems to resonate with the most people. And White Knight is the fic I'd most like to see turned into an episode of the show. :D

I'll tag @thetimemoves @insistentbass @lololollywrites @arwamachine @naefelldaurk @clueless-mp4 @totallysilvergirl and anyone else who would like to play along!

#fic writer questions #sherlock #johnlock

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heres-to-all-that-is-mine · 7 months

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Unfinished stuff part two! Written Before The Third Game Came Out And Abandoned By Now Edition. This one’s called “Work benefits”. I believe it was about Zor offering Phoenix a job, citing the terrible Agency work conditions and the benefits of a job with Zoraxis, and Phoenix actually considering it but ultimately deciding against it?

They skid around the corner in a panic, bullets whizzing past and pinging against the floor, but they don't falter for a moment. If they did, they'd be dead.

Their Handler's voice, usually ever present, ever droning, has been reduced to a staticky crackling in their ear through the work of some kind of jammer, maybe, they're not entirely sure, but it means they're on their own and that's... not new, not foreign, but disconcerting. They'd gotten used to having him there, talking, though they didn't always listen.

It leaves them feeling more jittery than usual, though adrenaline has drowned out most of their worries.

The situation- they're running through an unfamiliar building, pursued by Zoraxis agents who would like nothing more than to put them six feet under (or quite possibly more, if they can get away with it) after stealing some very valuable files. Blueprints, maybe, the details escape them but they're important, and they have them- …the situation is not ideal. What's also not ideal is the stinging, burning sensation building in their shoulder where a bullet must have grazed them. They shift the files to the other arm, hoping they didn't manage to get blood on it, and glance around quickly.

The goons are only seconds away, and they can't keep running for much longer, so they need- aha! A door, left slightly ajar, the room behind it pitch black. They really hope it's empty because the agents are catching up and they've just lost whatever advantage they had by hesitating- and what the hell, they might die either way, so they throw themself into the darkened room and close the door carefully in one jerky movement, hearing the footsteps race past.

For what seems like an eternity, they sit hunched against the door, holding their breath and hearing their blood rushing in their ears.

...Nothing. They're safe- for now.

Slowly they begin to take stock of their surroundings, eyes adjusting to the dark. They quickly locate a string connected to a light, and give it a tug with their telekinesis, unwilling to stand up just yet.

It's a small room, the walls lined with shelves of old equipment and a couple of cleaning supplies here and there- most things are covered in a fine coat of dust. Ironic, perhaps, for a broom closet to be so dusty. It looks like some strange hybrid of an equipment storage room and a broom closet.

It doesn't look to be regularly used. Good.

Having given everything a quick once over, they turn their attention back to themself, checking on the wound that had begun to ache properly by now. It doesn't look too deep, but it's still sluggishly bleeding and patches of black are spreading through the dark fabric of the uniform they'd snagged, rendering the disguise mostly useless. With a strained grimace they look around the room again, and find a spare uniform hung on a hook at the far end of the room, setting about tearing strips of fabric from their current uniform to use as impromptu bandages.

Focused on the task as they were, they didn't notice one of the dusty monitors star flickering with static until a strange, warbling voice crackled to life.

"Hello, Agent," the voice says conversationally, and they jerk back in surprise, the back of their head hitting the door hard enough for them to wince in pain.

This... is not their Handler, nor is it anybody who's voice they recognise- it sounds distorted, masculine and feminine voices seeming to overlap, shifting from a low to a high pitch rapidly, and yet it has a tone reminiscent of someone calm and collected, someone in control.

...They have a sinking feeling that they do, in fact, know who this is.

"I've been watching you for some time," the voice continues, and they wonder why this person would possibly do such a thing if they are indeed who the agent thinks they are. "Your track record is most intriguing. I understand you're the agent behind foiling a number of our "schemes"."

To sum their current situation up in one word, it was 'bad'.

[Yes, well...]

They sign, grimacing at the ache in their shoulder.

"It's your job, yes," the voice finishes their sentence for them, tone something reminiscent of friendly, with none of the warmth associated with such a tone. "I know. I know quite a lot about you, Agent."

The room suddenly seems more claustrophobic than before, they think, as they finish tying the makeshift bandage.

"...and I expect you know some about me, as well."

[You're not just a Z agent.]

A burst of static- laughter, maybe, or a scoff- makes them twitch, increasingly unnerved. This conversation is telling them nothing, not why they're having a conversation like this, nor how this person knew they'd be here.

"I am not, no. You may know me as Dr. Zor."

Shit.

Well, they're officially screwed! Or, well, they're not really sure. Why on Earth would the head of the Zoraxis organisation want to speak with them- or, more pressingly, why are they still alive and unrestrained for this conversation?

#purples art!#mine!#fanfic!#ieytd #agent phoenix #dr Zor

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b-i-t-c-h-y-m-u-g-g-l-e · 4 months

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Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I liked one of your fics!

Sitting at home being sick, not really willing to do much, I've decided to do some cleanup of old files, saved links, etc. What I've found among other things was a link to your AFF account - must have saved it after reading Salvation (IchiTatsu, amirite ;)?), hoping that you would publish more chapters (it was around half a year after the latest chapter being published, so I was not completely insane in having some hope, was I?).

Anyway, having come across it, I've decided to read it again, and I must say that I still find it a good read. Having read it 12 years ago, being younger and more impressionable at the time, it made a bigger of an impact back then, but it's still really nice. I have almost* no regrets about spending a good fraction of the day binge-reading it.

I've checked your profile at AFF, and having seen no updates or new Bleach fics, I've gone through a chain of sites (with no recent activity there) and ended up here.

So I've created an account just to let you know that I've really enjoyed it; I believe that people who do a good job at something should be praised, so here's my thank you. And also because I had faintly hoped that it would help me get the story outta my head (which it didn't).

*I could have been productive, or could've touched upon a game/TV series/a book that I've put off for a long time, or do sth else entirely - no, none of this (even though I have a number of things I wanted to do - their number is probably part of the reason I'm not doing them...). I somewhat regret having read it for the sole reason that now your story occupies my headspace and doesn't want to leave, and what makes it even harder to get it out of my head is that I've binged it so I've taken in a lot at once, and also because it's unfinished, so my brain was like "where's the rest? what happens next? how does it end".

PS I've never used tumblr before, so I don't even know how the Ask functionality works exactly. Well, here's to hoping that it reaches you! :)

Omg I wasn't expecting this 😭.

I had issues with the AFF site regarding my fics and the old email attached to it that I pretty much abandoned my Bleach stories there due to it.

Also the advance of Salvation made the story too big to already move and I ran the risk of being told I was "stealing" my own story due to the old email mess up.

However... Let me put a read more

I however do know how the story proceeds and ends. I've got it all in my head just like all my endings it's just that I'll never add it to the format due to all these technical issues.

I can tell you the way the story ends in another ask under a read more for closure since I know how it's like to be invested on something unfinished and never seeing the answers to the the ending.

I'm still amazed people still remember my really old stuff and I'm glad you reached out to tell me about this.

Hopefully this will give you some closure. You can also ask away anything about the story that you're curious on since I do have everything stored up on my head about IchiTat in that universe.

#bleach #salvation #fanfiction #i really loved that story but aff was a nightmare #regret using that site 😔#ask #my stories

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northern-passage · 2 years

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hi! you're one of my favourite if authors n i love when you share stuff about the process, but i guess i wanted to ask how you got over the daunting challenge of coding? i have an IF idea i love very much and have spent a couple years creating content for (from productive writing to indulgent artbreeder portraits) but i find the idea of coding all the variation i have in mind rly intimidating, i guess i just wonder if you have any advice on managing the sprawling code and keeping it manageable,, or just not freaking out when it continues to grow,, im excited to share but i think this aspect of it might kick my ass though im dedicated to the IF medium,,, anyways love u

coding can be intimidating and overwhelming and it takes a lot of trial and error. when i started in choicescript i made a lot of stupid mistakes and didn't even know how to run the bug test, and when i posted the original demo it was a broken game lmao. i still made coding errors in the most recent update over a year later. and now i'm changing gears and learning twine and it's still a process. thankfully (?) i’m a stubborn ass so i refuse to let the code beat me. it’s difficult, but it's definitely something that gets easier as you go and as you get more familiar with the code itself and what you can do with it.

imo, it sounds like you already did the hardest part - you have a story you want to tell, and you’re familiar with the characters and you’ve already got some writing under your belt. so you know how the story goes and what you want to accomplish with the interactivity of the medium... like you’re already halfway there, honestly. the next step is to just start testing out some code!!!

so before i even open twine or choicescript or anything, first thing is i have my story organized with folders. so many folders.

i actually write in scrivener, and i really like scrivener because it lets me make a billion subfolders and organize them exactly how i want. i code as i write, too, which is very helpful for future me when i have to import everything into twine.

while there is coding & smaller variations/flavor text going on within each scene, i can also physically break the variations up easier and have two separate files for one scene, like with Lea Wakes You Up, and i can still keep them all under the same folder. obviously you don't need scrivener to do this you can do it in google docs or word, etc as well. the folders are my preferred way to keep track of bigger variations, like whether or not the player has chosen to stay in blackwater or if they’re leaving for highfell. you can see i already have some scenes for the highfell branch written there.

also some authors use spreadsheets to keep track of variables & stats and all the branching, and to ensure things are balanced. i don't do that myself but... i should.... lmao. i actually just have a passage in twine that lists all of the variables i’ve made and what they do, and i’ll reference that if needed. in choicescript, you put all your variables in startup.txt & there i would use the *comment command to leave notes for myself for each variable.

now, for the actual coding/importing part... my process relies entirely on code skeletons. the passages in twine are very annoying for writing but very good for building a path and keeping track of where things are going.

you can see here i have two separate paths that reconvene and i also have it color coded at the moment:

when it comes to variations within these passages, i cannot stress enough that code skeletons are your friend. i'll make a passage and leave in notes like “this is what goes here” and then do something like this:

so i note down all the variations i need within the scene first in the code, and then from there i'll go back in and slowly fill them in. i use WIP so then i can easily search "WIP" and twine will highlight which passages still have unfinished variations.

when i start writing a scene i always ask myself: what variables matter here, and do i need to create different variations for these variables? are there previous choices that should be influencing the characters and their attitudes here that i need to take into account? where do i want these branches to reconvene and how do i get these scenes there? once you figure those things out, you can make your passages and build a skeleton.

once i do that i then write the “spine” of the scene, which is the scene at its most basic, and once that’s done i go back in and add/flesh out choices, elaborate on the variations, etc as the last step. this does mean that sometimes i have to edit the spine later, too, and it’s just something you have to keep in mind. it will be difficult at times and sometimes scenes will not go the way you want them to, but that’s what makes it fun, too.

basically with coding and branching the only way you're going to figure it out is to just do it!! expect to make errors and to get frustrated (my friends can tell you i got very angry at twine in the early days lmfao and i still do) but it's a skill you'll improve over time as you keep practicing. the branching can get overwhelming at times but that’s when i’ll just sit down and do a good old fashioned bulleted list and just take some time to write it all out and slowly work my way through each point. there’s no rush and don’t feel pressured to get it all right the first time - there’s always the option to go back and change things if you want to. it’s all part of the process, babey

when i wrote the first version of TNP’s prologue it had barely any branching - the hunter Had to let clementine come with them, the hunter Had to agree to go to blackwater (there was no argument at all), there were literally no choices in the wraith fight and the hunter always got scratched in the back and passed out on the road. it wasn’t until later that i went back in and rewrote it with more choices and variables once i had gotten comfortable with choicescript.

and like i said, you really have already done most of the hard work. having a story to tell is over half the battle. with time and practice you’ll be able to get the code to do what you want.

#love u too anon #i wrote this whole thing and then tumblr deleted it so <3 hrng #ask #anonymous

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

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So I've been following this one guy who gives really good writing advice, but lately he's been: telling people it's OK to skip the Intermission in Homestuck; defending bad writing as a "structural issue" (those poor writers, it's not their fault they've structured their story / writing process in a bad way); priding himself on making a half-assed "unfinished-on-purpose" comic review. This person was my main source of writing advice, so I don't know where to turn to. Any recommendations?

The only other webcomic review guys I’m aware of are the Bad Webcomics Wiki, but if you think I’m too nice on writers, they might be up your speed anyway and oh my god they just posted a review of a SpiderForest comic. Guess it’s time for

The Webcomic Review Reviews Webcomic Reviews

So, this is a review of a SpiderForest comic called “The Guide to a Healthy Relationship” which is a comic about LGBT people, and it’s being reviewed by the Bad Webcomics Wiki, so obviously there’s going to be a whole bunch of slurs, so consider that a content warning and I’m putting the rest of this behind a ReadMore

This is going to be slightly disjointed because the BWW review is disjointed, but I’ll do my best

We’re already in some factual trouble right on line one, since TGtaHR is a traditional webcomic and not a long-scroll mobile-friendly webtoon, nor is it hosted on webtoons.com. Is this nitpicky? Maybe a little, but we’re off to a poor start here.

This comic is just under 200 pages.

I feel like if you’re going to write a big thing attacking a webcomic’s story, you should try to have some kind of understanding of what that story is. I know what the story of Sinfest is, and Sinfest is a confusing nightmare.

Okay, so maybe the reason you think this story is bad is because it’s 2deep4u.

So, in the space of about twenty pages, we learn that Apollo had a friend named Julian who killed himself, and then we cut ahead to Julian drinking on the job, going to a party, taking drunks, and waking up naked in the bathtub covered in beer bottles, and the living room is full of too-hot-for-tumblr passed-out drunks. The Bad Webcomics Wiki calls this “Softcore porn that is never brought up again”, because the Bad Webcomics Wiki is written by high school dropouts for an audience they presume has never read the comic proper.

This debauchery is never brought up again because it’s not relevant to the plot, it’s relevant to the character. Apollo is fucked up because his friend killed himself when he was a teenager, and he deals with being fucked up by retreating into sex, drugs, and rock and roll. That’s what’s being established here. Also being established if you’re paying attention: Apollo has scars on his chest.

In chapter 1, Apollo goes to a party, the entirety of which is dedicated to him walking around naked, and we get a bunch of obviously sexual shots of his dick, clearly catering to the author's gay fetish. His boss goes to his place to check on him, and it is revealed he is a hoarder. This never comes up again.

1. In this scene, there are two panels where you can see Apollo’s penis, one panel where you can see someone’s vomit-covered dick, and two panels where you can see a woman’s breasts. None of these panels of flacid dicks or sagging boobs are sexual, though. The dicks are unpowered, it doesn’t make a bit of difference guys, the balls are inert.

2. What the fuck is a “gay fetish” and how it different from just “being gay”.

3. I don’t know the author, even though we’re both in SpiderForest, so I don’t know where Dani The Carutor lies in the whole gender spectrum thingamabob, but I will note that “Dani” is usually short for Danielle. So maybe it’s not a safe assumption that the author is a man? I dunno. That’s just me, guessing people’s genders by screen name is hard, so I try not to lest I embarrass myself.

4.So, when you say Apollo is a “hoarder”, you link to a page showing his room is disgusting and covered in garbage

Is your takeaway from these panels....that Apollo is some kind of fanatic garbage collector? That his room is full of garbage because he actively works at having as much garbage as possible because he wants it?

There are a couple pages explaining Apollo's purple special snowflake eyes with some snowflake "disability".

Apollo has Ocular Albinism, which is a real condition that really exists, and really does give you purple eyes. It also gives you major vision problems, which are the context in which it gets brought up, because Apollo needs help crossing the road because he can’t see well enough in the light. So I don’t know what the scare quotes around “disability” are for. He can’t see. You could, if you were so inclined, connect this plot point with the way the chapter titles are named after mental conditions, and start to formulate some coherent critique with the seemingly cavalier way this comic uses disability, but that would require thought. It might even require research into difficult topics, because you’d ideally not want to make a fool of yourself talking about things you didn’t understand well enough to talk competently about.

Chapter 2 is the most pointless, as it is basically there to confirm what we already know so the author can insert a cringy buzzword (see image below)

Okay, so a couple of things

1. In what fucking universe is “tranny” an SJW buzzword? What the fuck are you even talking about?

2. Having the protagonist of your comic say someone is “smart, for a tranny” is like the least SJW thing you could possibly do.

3. Perhaps “Apollo is asking someone for help but casually insults her causing her to leave” is some kind of “character” moment? The author of this review is so /pol/-poisoned that they have no ability to understand “context” or “characterization” or basically any thing that exists.

4.Your list of the comic’s characters includes this bon mot:

So what the fuck? That’s so stupid I’d think it was an intentionally hypocritical joke if I had any reason to believe you were capable of it.

Chapter 3 is dedicated to revealing the boyfriend shit

I should point out that Apollo and Julian being boyfriends is something the BWW invented, the comic itself clearly states they were “best friends”, not boy friends. Couple of dudes being prudes.

Apollo believes that Julian faked his own death, which fucked up Apollo for years, and now that they’ve met each other Julian keeps ghosting him. Apollo’s motives for chasing Julian around are extremely clear.

That’s a scene transition, bay-bee!

Apollo finally gets ahold of Julian. Julian blows him off and Apollo gives up. There’s then a clear scene transition to Apollo, at a restaurant, talking about what we just saw. This is a perfectly clear scene transition, with a transitory panel and everything to indicate that this is the next day. It’s certainly more clear than Apollo waking up in jail in chapter 2 which you skipped over. Are you actually reading this comic at all?

You are such a fucking moron, holy shit.

Julian got beat up for being trans. It’s unclear if he’s actually trans or just a feminine-looking cis dude, but regardless it was bad enough to traumatize him and this all happened when he knew Apollo, who calls Julian his “best friend”, and says things like

There’s literally two dots here, and you’re unable to connect them. Galia even has the same hairstyle as Julian to make it visually obvious This Is What The Reference and you still missed it.

Julian and Apollo walk around the woods in their underwear for no reason whatsoever. Julian takes some drugs or something, and passes out?

Hm. Why does Julian go outside at night? I wonder if that’s explained in the comic?

Oh, I see. He went outside to smoke. But why did Apollo go outside at night?

Oh, he was looking out the window and saw Julian mysteriously go off into the woods. I guess that’s explained, too. I guess you just missed those pages

Julian takes some drugs or something, and passes out?

Huh, I wonder why Julian was asleep

Oh, he has Insomnia, so he took something called Halcion. I wonder what that is.

Oh, it’s a prescription insomnia medication. And you shouldn’t take alcohol with it, wow Julian is dealing with a super pushy alcoholic I should file that information away for later, like how knowing Wellbutrin’s side effects in teenagers were critical to understand Drop Out. Luckily webcomics are comics, on the web, and I can look this up!

He is then woken up by the fatty side character punching him. Somehow, Julian destroyed the kitchen, even though he was passed out - this is never explained, and makes no fucking sense

Sigh.

So, here are some hints as to what happened.

Julian has bruises all over his body, which you have consistently failed to notice.

Daniel, Julian’s friendly boyfriend, has like no negative reaction whatsoever to Brandon, some random dude, punching Julian in the fucking face

He even takes Brandon’s side and basically implants the idea that Julian did it into Julian’s head, and that last panel is rather threatening.

Julian took insomnia medicine, and fell asleep, and then got wrongfully blamed for destroying the kitchen by Daniel, who know’s that Julian was passed out and couldn’t have done it. Who actually did destroy the kitchen is a mystery, but Daniel is the most likely culprit.

it transitions into this trippy bullshit with blood, and body horror, and Julian's hair is suddenly short

It’s short because it’s a flashback to when he was a teenager, and he had short hair when he was a teenager so that literate people are able to understand this without getting confuzzled.

Apollo turning into Daniel in this trippy dream sequence is also pretty relevant!

Also, we have random nudity and sexualization of this sick person.

No, we have reveals that he’s in worse physical shape than we thought.

By the way, in your character list, you describe Daniel as

Daniel (Side Character): He may as well be a wall. This guy has no personality whatsoever. No quirks, no interests, no purpose outside of causing superficial melodrama.

If you’ve made it all the way to this point and not picked up on Daniel being an abusive boyfriend and the primary antagonist of the story, you may be beyond hope.

The rest of the chapter is Julian being angsty, and SO ILL while everyone talks about how weird he is

Again, that’s very clearly and obviously not actually what’s happening in the story.

What’s happening isn’t “Julian is sick lol”, it’s “Daniel is working to turn everyone against Julian”. That’s why he destroyed the kitchen and blamed Julian for it; to ensure that the other boys all thought Julian was a nutjob and thus keep them from reaching out to Julian and providing Julian with a guide to a healthy relationship instead of the abusive one he’s currently in. Your inability to read even slightly between the lines isn’t just distressing in terms of your inability to think critically about stories, it’s maybe worrisome re your ability to think about the real world, too. How are you this dense? It’s like watching Star Wars and not picking up that the empire and the rebellion don’t like each other. No wonder you’re confused!

Chapter 5 is still in the works. It jumps the shark right away with Apollo getting drunk and sleeping with Julian's boyfriend. The author makes Apollo the guilty party and not the boyfriend

The comic is fairly clear that Daniel is the bad guy

This webtoon is so convoluted there is no saving it at this point. Each chapter is titled after some mental illness such as 'Monophobia', 'Anxiety', 'Psychosis'. You think they would have some thematic meaning with each chapter being about one of those things. Nope, they're just titled like that to show how EDGY this webtoon is! You can taste the cringe. Julian's mental shit has no rhyme or reason - he will act sick when the plot calls for it, and if it has anything to do with the chapter's title, it is also crazy inaccurate.

The author of this review somehow managed to read the entirety of The Guide to a Healthy Relationship without picking up that Daniel was an abuser. The comic thus seems convoluted to him because he thinks all the things happening are random events without rhyme or reason because he has completely failed to notice the whole plot, which is not subtle. Just....fucking staggering incompetence, as a critic.

Guess you’re stuck with me, anon.

#Anonymous #The Guide to a Healthy Relationship #bad webcomics wiki #The webcomic review reviews webcomic reviews

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kidmachinate · 4 years

Text

One Drawer At a Time

My drawers don't look this nice but has the amount a drawers I seek to make the post about so here's a picture of a bedroom dresser with six drawers.

A week or so ago, I decided my sock and boxer drawer was a bit...much. Why? Too many socks. Non matching, holes. etc. I don't put these on but they get tossed back in. Why? Why this need to hold onto stuff. Stuff is actually starting to bother me. I've been stepping into the idea of minimalism as of late and ever since the original people that started putting out the idea, people have their own take on it. It is more like an idea that you shape around your own preferences. People seem to all do it a bit different. That and I'm a gamer so...there's a lot of collectible stuff I'm probably never tossing. However, around the house stuff, that is a much easier task. Point being, I took care of the drawer and there is less now. Only in it what makes sense.

Fast forward to this morning, I decided to tackle another drawer. I've noticed that I'll think more on this stuff when something isn't right. However, it is much better to be productive than to live depressed and in bed. I did that. Could still be doing it now, really. I didn't. I made that drawer my bitch and tackled the cluttered mess of old receipts, Bill's, and previous living arrangements. Why keep it all? It's been hidden all this time. Record of bills paid? I'm not gonna lie...I have a file for some of that stuff...but all the important things I can reference online. Easy things to toss away. Old VGA cable for a monitor? What uses that anymore? Gone. Chargers to things I no longer own? Gone. One less cluttered aspect of my life.

One can't always control what the mind will do to itself but you can make it a bit easier and distract yourself. Even if it is the smallest thing. A tip I got from a online video states to spend two minutes on a task. You'll find more times than not, leaving it unfinished is unacceptable. Suddenly, the task is done and your life is better off for it. Still didn't make the bed though. Oops.

Eventually I will get to the other four. In due time. Don't need the extra pressure but they will be there to make a day better.

#progression #distractions #tasks #housework #small steps

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wellamarke · 7 years

Text

someday

humans challenge, week 4, day 2: prequels this is a prequel to the actual setting of @nachocheese-itsmycheese’s fic ’finally’ but refers to a time period mentioned within it

Sophie had taken her niece to the park, since it was a sunny afternoon and Mattie was busy with work. She sat in her flat, listening to how empty and silent it was without her daughter in it. Even the tapping of her fingers against computer keys couldn’t distract her from that absence.

It was funny to think that only two years ago, she’d scarcely been able to imagine herself with a child at all. Now, being without one, even for an hour or so, was what felt unnatural.

Mattie glanced over her laptop screen, at a picture on the wall behind it. It was a framed photograph of a sleeping baby, one pudgy hand curled up next to her cheek, the other tucked under her blanket. Her eyes were closed, the soft, pink eyelids hiding the piercing blue eyes she’d inherited from her father. It was unfair, really, how closely she resembled him. Sometimes Mattie wondered guiltily if that particular picture was actually all that good, or if she’d just chosen to display that one because it hid the most defining Leo-feature from view. The further he was from her thoughts, the easier it was to carry on.

It had been almost six months since she’d last heard from him at all. Leo was in the States these days, helping Athena Morrow with her research. He was still the only one of his kind, but Dr Morrow was convinced that with enough observation, she could figure out how David Elster had ‘resurrected’ him, and rework it for other head trauma patients. It would be a major breakthrough; it would rewrite whole fields of medical science. It also kept him well out of Mattie’s way, which was a bittersweet bonus. Part of her still loved him at least as much as she hated him, if not more. The balance was fragile, and tiring, and never-ending.

She finished fixing the faulty code she’d been asked to work on, and sent it back to her client, with instructions on how to check if their synth friend was responding to the update. That done, she was just about to click on the next email when the buzzer sounded, letting her know someone wanted to be let into the building.

She got up from her desk and pressed the intercom button, half expecting it to be Sophie, back from the park a little early. “Hello?”

At first there was no response. Then the intercom gave a crackle, and a voice that certainly wasn’t Sophie said, “Hi. It’s me.”

There was a pause. Then, “Can I come up?”

Mattie’s chest felt suddenly hollow, like a huge gulf had opened there, vast and terrible and able to swallow her whole if she didn’t do something to escape it. “Leo,” she all but croaked.

Another crackle. “Yes,” he said, sounding hesitant, as though answering a roll-call for a class he hadn’t signed up for.

“I’ll come down,” she said. She didn’t want him in her flat. She didn’t want to be enclosed in this space with him. Not because she had ever feared him or what he could do or say to her, but because this was her place: the home she shared with her daughter and no-one else, that had a bed Leo had never slept in and a door he’d never so much as knocked on. It worked for her because he wasn’t part of it. If she let him inside, even once, the trace of him would never go away. She wouldn’t put herself through that.

Mattie grabbed her keys from the hook and left the flat, pausing briefly outside the lift, but then drifting past it in favour of the stairs. She was four floors up. She would take the small delay, and use it to attempt to gather her thoughts.

Why was he here? What could possibly have brought him to her block, after all these months of silence? If there was any big, awful news in the family, she would know via Mia or Max by now. Surely he wasn’t here to apologise, or ask forgiveness, or any of those things she’d given up hoping for sometime between the start of her third trimester and the sound of a newborn cry. None of that was ever going to happen. They were always going to be unfinished, and she’d learnt to call the frayed endings ‘closure’. It was healthier that way.

Mattie’s heart was beating far too fast for just four flights of stairs, by the time she reached the bottom. She couldn’t pretend it was the physical exertion. Talking to Leo was, somehow, both the last thing she wanted to do, and the thing she wanted most in the world. Why did everything with him have to be a duality, a contradiction in terms?

She made her way along the hallway, her stride several times more confident than she felt inside. Eventually she reached the door, and she gave herself a final second to prepare before opening it.

He wasn’t on the doorstep, as she might have expected. He’d retreated to the bottom of the path that lead to the block of flats, hunched over, his hands in his pockets. Looking as he so often did, like a fish out of water, cut adrift from everything. He looked up at the sound of the door opening, and their eyes met across the short distance between them.

Part of Mattie wanted to stand her ground, and force him to be the one to close the gap, but part of her didn’t want to associate him even with the outside of her building. She went down the path and met him, fixing him with her coldest glance as she did so.

“What do you want?” she asked, bluntly.

He didn’t answer. Instead he looked about her, as if expecting her not to be alone. “Where’s…?”

She noted with hostility that he couldn’t even bring himself to say his daughter’s name. “She’s not here,” Mattie said.

Leo’s eyes widened slightly, but whatever he was wondering, he didn’t voice it.

“She’s out with Sophie,” Mattie added, before she could stop herself. She refused to wonder if her subconscious had taken pity on his obvious confusion. “Did you want to see her?”

He nodded. Mattie was taken aback, but she tried not to show it.

“Both of you,” he clarified, voice somewhat hoarse. “I wanted to see both of you.”

“Well, come back in an hour,” she said. “Or meet them at the park. Whatever you want.”

“You don’t mind?”

Mattie’s eyes flashed with fury. “Mind?” Her throat felt tight and strained, but somehow the words forced themselves out regardless. “It was never me who wanted her to grow up without a dad, Leo. That was you. I’ve wanted her to see you every single day since the moment she was born. I don't—” She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. “I don’t personally believe that you deserve to see her. But I’m not going to stand in the way of my daughter seeing her father. She deserves that much, even if you don’t.”

She turned away from him. She’d said too much already, less than two minutes in - the conversation wasn’t going to end with a civil handshake now. She wished he would leave. She wished he would stay. She wanted him to never come back and never leave her side again. Most of all she wished she’d gone to the park with Sophie, and left an empty flat for him to ring up. She would never have even known he’d been here.

“I thought I’d left it too late,” he said. He cleared his throat, a strangled sound. “She won’t remember me.”

“And whose fault is that,” Mattie said bitterly.

“Mine,” he said, without hesitation. “Obviously, mine. Everything has been my fault. I don’t expect anything from you, I just… had to ask if you’d let me see her again.”

“Well, I’ve said you can. I’ve told you how. Is that all you came for?”

“No. I… want to try. I want to try and… be something, to her.”

“Something,” Mattie repeated sourly. “As in ‘better than nothing’? How about just being her father?”

“I…”

He trailed off completely. Long moments passed before he spoke again. “I was wrong before. I said I never wanted to be a father, but what I meant was that I didn’t want to be my father. I think you knew that. We had that long argument about frames of reference, but I wasn’t hearing you properly. I couldn’t… I just kept coming back to all the ways I’m exactly like him. Do you know how often I’ve wished he’d just left me at the bottom of that lake? I couldn’t see myself doing any better than he did.”

“So you decided to punish our daughter for your own insecurities,” said Mattie. “This isn’t news, Leo. I’m not stupid. I don’t have to be a psychiatrist to know you’ve got issues with the concept of fatherhood - it would be weirder if you didn’t. But you can’t just…use that as an excuse. It’s not her fault. It’s not my fault. But you left both of us.”

“I know,” he said. “I shouldn’t have run away, or said any of the things I said. I don’t have any justification for that.”

“So what’s changed?” Mattie folded her arms in front of her. “Why show up now?”

“I realised I was wasting Doctor Morrow’s time,” said Leo. “She wanted to study my memories, the way they’re ordered and how the recall works. I let her see some of them. The old ones, from… before. But it was the newer files she was interested in, how my brain creates new paths for itself. And I wouldn’t let her see them, because I didn’t want to look up on that screen and see… you.”

Mattie pressed her lips together, and stared down at her feet, giving him nothing.

“I’d closed off everything about you. I hadn’t even realised I could do that. I don’t think I ever could before. When we first met, I told you I was unable to forget, and that’s still true, but I realised only recently that I can partition off whole sections of data. Like moving them to another drive. It’s something to do with the grafts Athena put in after… after Hester. There’s still a disconnect. Everything I didn’t want to think about, I was transferring across so that it wouldn’t keep surfacing, and that made all her research pretty much defunct, because she wasn’t trying to replicate a repair that went wrong. She wanted the real thing, and I couldn’t let myself show her it, because that would mean… admitting that I’d been avoiding even thinking about you.” He kicked at a stray stone on the path in front. “So I told her I was sorry, and I caught the next flight. The others don’t even know I’m back in England.”

Mattie stood there, stock still, taking in what she could.

“You asked me what changed,” Leo continued. “And I suppose what I’m trying to say is… nothing changed. All this time thinking I didn’t need you any more, but none of it was true. I just wasn’t letting myself remember. It’s all the same as it ever was.”

For a while there was silence between them. A breeze whipped Mattie’s hair over her shoulder, and she raised her hand to swipe it away from her face. She tried not to notice the dampness on her skin as she did so.

“It isn’t the same,” she said softly. “It’s two years later. We can’t just… pick up where we left off.”

“I know.”

“I meant it when I said I won’t stop you seeing her. But please don’t make her any promises if you’re not going to keep them. Just… spend some time with her. But not here. Her home is for people who are permanent.”

Leo nodded. “Okay. I’ll… think of something.”

“I really wish I could just say I understand,” Mattie said, honestly. "And that we can try again. But if…”

She shook her head. “No. I’m not going to start any ‘ifs’ today. Give me some time to work those out.”

She dared to look at him again, and wondered if she saw a glimmer of hope in those eyes. She had grown unaccustomed to reading them.

“I think you should go, for now,“ she said. “I’ve got to process some of this without you standing there.”

“Of course.”

“And...I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Mattie added, “But it was good to see you. I think I’ve been doing a bit of memory partitioning myself.”

The corner of his mouth twitched upwards, a sad quarter-smile.

“Where are you staying?” she asked.

“A B&B in town. Just until I find out if Max and Flash can put me up.”

Mattie nodded. “Get Max to let me know, if they do. I can bring her over to theirs whenever you’re ready.”

“Alright. I will.”

He met her eyes again. “Thank you. For giving me a chance.”

“I’m only doing it for her,” she reminded him, although she wasn’t sure how true the words were, even as she spoke them.

He would have to work a lot harder and longer than this, that was for sure. But maybe there was a reason the ends had frayed so wildly, like they’d always been meant to knit back together. Someday. Somehow.

Perhaps it wasn't too late, not just yet.

#humanschallenge #leotilda #mattie hawkins #leo elster #im sorry if I messed the timeline anywhere :/#also hehe note how I Refused to name their child #hope you like it Jessi 😘#sorry it doesn't really end I didn't really know what I was doing #my phone tried to change your name to Jesus #I guess I hope he likes it too

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