#in other news my internship at the cinema is going well

[karanan]

Devastatingly, my stipend application for one year of artistic work was denied. They can't specify why due to the high volume of applications. The type of application I sent is extremely competitive and only about 10% go through. I've also heard it's incredibly hard for 1st timers and new artists to get any grants so it's not shocking, it still stings though.

Gonna be a very difficult year economically unless I magically get an actual job and not just an internship.

#I'll probably make a new application come November #and should make a separate one to a different art organisation #aughhh the artist's anguish is real #in other news my internship at the cinema is going well #I have not learned much of any Finnish whatsoever but the physical tasks themselves are okay--sometimes mildly fulfilling even #if things get bad I can always try opening commissions again for extra cash #9 euros a day is frankly beyond shit pay

[idkthisisjustforfanfic]

A STUDY IN YOU, chapter eleven

table of contents | talk to me & join the tag list | the playlist

December 8th, 2018

O’Halloran’s was exactly the place you expected the Graduate Cinema Studies end of semester party to be held. December had hit the city in full force--Christmas lights strung up behind the bar when Sophie smiled and turned around with your drink in hand. 

“You just let me know when you wanna go over there,” she smiled, handing your drink over before knocking hers against it. “Cheers.”

“Cheers,” you said, a sip before Max clicked his phone off and put it in his pocket. 

“Where are we going?”

“Over to the booth where Sudeikis is,” Sophie smirked. 

“We’re not,” you said quickly. “I told you guys--it might be over.”

“Respectfully,” Max began, still sipping a glass of red wine. It’s winter now, he’d said with a smile when you’d all walked in. It’s pinot noir season. “I don’t believe you that it might be over.”

“Just because nothing’s happened in a few weeks doesn’t mean it’s over,” Sophie agreed.

“I know,” you shrugged. “But it’s felt weird ever since the Jennie thing. And we’ve been so busy at work with the script and the fact that we actually finished on time is insane.”

“When do you guys hand it in again?” Naomi asked.

“Well, I guess Jason handed in everything up until episode seven just for fun--so eight, nine, and ten are due before Christmas.”

“I cannot believe you’re writing on a TV show,” Sophie smiled. “Our little best friend is so legit,” she smiled at Max and Naomi. 

They’d been plenty proud of you, plenty excited to celebrate your wins and let you pout about Jason when needed. Which is why, tonight of all nights, a night where you should be able to just get slightly wasted with your cohort in celebration of another semester down, one to go, was not the night to talk about Jason.

“We’ve all accomplished a lot this semester,” you shifted focus. 

“Speaking of,” Naomi said with a smile, her eyes fluttered between the three of you. “I actually wanted to let you guys know that I submitted a film to a student showcase at Cannes.”

“What?” You reached and held onto her wrist. “Naomi--are you kidding? That’s amazing!”

“Why are we just hearing about this now?” Max asked with a smile, he wrapped his arm around her when Sophie’s mouth hung open in shock. 

“Did you already win every award? Cause you’re so fucking talented?” 

“No, no,” Naomi laughed at your friend. “I talked with Laurie about it and she really loved a project I did with my internship this semester and I kind of figured--you know--why not? Worst case scenario I don’t get picked. Not a huge deal.”

“Was it the doc you did on Black neighborhoods in New York and the impacts of gentrification? The one that blew everyone away?” Max nodded, knowing the answer to his own question.

Naomi’s documentary had blown everyone away. She smiled and nodded, slightly uncomfortable being the center of attention but still beaming. Max took off to get her another drink, there’s so much to celebrate! 

You greeted other classmates and chatted with your friends about holiday plans. Traveling, time off, people were just excited to leave the city for more than a few hours. You were excited to visit family back home, but you also knew that the NBC Internship only granted you two weeks off for Christmas and New Year’s. 

So you’d return to New York much sooner than everyone else, back to your tiny apartment and your subway rides to midtown. 

O’Halloran’s was packed with people from your department. Professors and adjuncts, clubs and cliques that mingled in the basement bar only two blocks from campus. Eventually, Jason and Will found their way into your circle when Max and another classmate, Hannah, joked with Naomi about her Cannes submission. 

“You’ll have stress dreams until you hear back,” Max nodded confidently. “Nightmares, honestly.”

“You’ll probably dream that they’ll show the wrong film to all of those people. Your worst film ever,” Hannah smiled. 

Naomi giggled but winced at the thought. 

“You submitted something to Cannes?” Jason asked her with a smile. “Naomi, that's super awesome.”

“Thanks,” she smiled up at him. “Yeah--I just submitted so who knows when I’ll hear back.”

“How’s it feel to have such a successful bunch of students?” Sophie pushed her glass towards his, taking a sip when she smiled up at him. 

“Yeah--no, you guys are definitely something,” he nodded. “Setting a high bar for the department.”

“What are they doing?” Will asked, another beer for he and Jason when he came back from the bar. 

“We’re just amazing,” Sophie shrugged at Will. “Impressive, dedicated, talented--”

“Humble,” you teased your friend. Jason laughed and caught your eye for a second. 

You wondered what he thought of the space between you. Not just the few feet inside O'Halloran's, but the metaphorical step back that both of you had taken. Did he notice? Did he care?

You would have turned to him, asked how he was doing or what he’d been up to lately--but his eyebrows were furrowed when he looked down at his phone, after a second he looked up at you and said quietly: “NBC’s ordering full production of season one.”

You blinked a few times, sure you hadn’t heard him right over the laughter in the bar and the thump of the music that sputtered through old speakers overhead. “What?”

“Charlie Hanson--the guy who hired me--just emailed,” he flipped his phone around and showed you the words. 

We’re loving the script, full production, ten episodes, next year--contracts to start on season two. 

You held his hands in yours to steady his phone, read it three times and ignored the way your heartbeat climbed at the feeling of his skin against yours. You looked up at him quickly, he smiled and waited for you to say something.

“Holy fucking shit.”

“Holy fucking shit,” he nodded. “I uh--should I text everyone?”

“Yes!” 

Now Sophie and Max were aware that something was happening. The other conversations seemed to die down and they all turned to see what had you and Jason so excited. 

“We get to keep our jobs,” Jason looked up at Will, who looked down at you. 

“The show you’re writing?”

“NBC wants full production starting next year,” you smiled. 

“Holy shit!” Sophie smiled, reaching forward to hug you. Max and Naomi did too, Jason snuck away from the group and typed on his phone. You let Will get you another drink, laughed when Max said he’d audition for a role just to get the up close and personal experience of your script. 

After another few minutes Jason returned, his text came through on your phone and the group chat lit up with excitement. Emojis and gifs and confetti that splashed onto your screen brought a smile to your face.

But he stood with Will and Jesse and then Laurie came by and congratulated Naomi on her submission. He didn’t come back over to you and when the bar started to thin out you let your eyes scan the room. 

“Are you looking for me?” His voice was behind you, he scribbled on a receipt on the bar, handed it back to the bartender before he smiled. 

“No,” you lied. “Sophie--but--if I know her she’s outside smoking a joint with Max already.”

He laughed at that, put his credit card back in his wallet and then slid it into his pocket. 

“Are you heading out?”

“I am,” he nodded. “It’s almost midnight and while you guys are all young enough to go to another bar, I don’t have that in me anymore.”

You smiled, wondered for a second what he’d say if you asked him to come home with you. 

“But--uh--congrats, obviously, with the script!”

“You too!”

“We’ve got our hands full now--I’m sure we’ll get more info from Charlie. Talk more about contracts and stuff for season two.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, disappointed that he’d chosen to reroute the conversation towards work rather than play. 

“And, we can talk more about this, but--I can talk with them about paying you. You’re part of the team and it’s not fair for you to not get a contract for another season. So, yeah.”

“Oh,” you said, caught off guard a little. “Yeah--that’s great, I appreciate that.”

“Of course,” he smiled. “But--yeah--I don’t want to keep you from Max and Sophie and--the joint, honestly.”

You laughed at his joke, nodded up at him. “I’ll see you next week?”

He nodded slowly, looked like he had something else to say. But then he just smiled. “You will.”

December 15th, 2018

Lower Manhattan buzzed on a Wednesday night later that month when you stepped into the warm reprieve of a quiet Starbucks near campus.

A latte on your way home from your internship before a once-monthly club meeting--one that mostly consisted of coffee and gossip instead of watching and reviewing a classic film. 

You’d spent the day as a writers assistant on the other show you’d been assigned to. You enjoyed the people you were with but it was no secret that your days with Jason’s writers room were preferred. 

You stood in line for a second, scanned the room when you noticed a face in the corner. Will—professor Will—with someone who looked a lot like Jason from behind. 

You leaned to the left, tried to sneak a peek. He moved, turned slightly to the right and you shirked behind the man in front of you.

Shit. It was him. Will would recognize you and Jason definitely would. Which meant the best option was to stop over and say hi.

You ordered and then did it, walked up as Jason lifted his palms.

“--with Y/N, but that’s what I told her, obviously. She’s stubborn.”

“Have you ever—“

“Hi,” you cut Will off awkwardly, they both turned and smiled. The looks in their eyes told you they worried you’d heard more than you had. Far enough away, enough rustling behind the counter as espresso was ground and drinks were poured.

“Hey,” Jason looked up at you, Will nodded and smiled, let his eyes dance between the two of you like he was just as curious as you were about how this would unfold. 

“Sorry to interrupt, I was just saying hi.”

“Hi, Y/N,” Will finally spoke, leaned back in his chair and looked amused. 

You laughed a little at him, offered an awkward grin.

“Where are you headed?” Jason asked, less nervous than Will now.

“Club meeting—coming from 30 Rock.”

“I bet it doesn’t get old saying that,” Will laughed.

“Never will,” you admitted, a nod when your name was called. They followed your sight line to the barista who pushed a cup forward in the designated pick up spot. “But, uh, I’m headed that way. Just thought I recognized the two of you hiding here in the corner.”

Jason laughed but nodded. “Yeah—I’ll talk to you later, see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” you smiled, a finger in his direction when you took a step back. “Tomorrow.”

You turned, sipped your latte when you turned left out the door and wondered what that was. Your name, you’d heard it. Stubborn.

Not wrong, but in what context? You probably should have been more nervous than you were. In any other circumstance you’d worry that they’d been talking negatively about you. Your fear of being annoying or young would creep in and you’d have hurried away much quicker.

But instead, you walked slowly past their window, flicked your hair over your shoulder and caught his eyes briefly through the glass.

He smiled, you kept going and the question settled in the city around you: was this more than sex? 

The next week Jason’s boss came for a meeting with the whole writer’s room. Questions were answered about production and contract delivery dates and Dan pulled a bottle of champagne from the mini fridge when Charlie said it was time to celebrate. 

There were higher ups you didn’t even know in attendance, you clinked glasses with someone in the C-Suite and made sure to soak it all in: your first TV show. And you hadn’t even graduated. 

Eventually Charlie and the other execs left, Jason told the team he wanted to have a Christmas party at his place to celebrate before the holiday break and Jennie offered to bring a veggie platter. 

You packed up your laptop and Javier teased her: “Just don’t bring celery, okay? No one likes that shit.”

“I like celery,” Jennie gave him the finger but laughed, waving over her shoulder when she headed for the elevator with Dan. Jason was scanning over emails on his laptop, ignoring the farewells they called from the hallway when it was just the two of you left in the room. 

You held your champagne in hand, one final sip now that your bag was over your shoulder and you were ready to go.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

He looked up, noticed everyone else was gone. “Yes--sorry,” he laughed. “I was just catching up on something.”

“You’re good.”

He watched you for a second, his own glass of champagne was beside his computer on the conference table. “I know we haven’t hung out in a while--I just, we’ve been busy, you know.”

Hung out. Huh. Interesting thing to call it.

“Yeah,” you nodded, waving him off like it was nothing. “No--it’s been a really wild few weeks.”

“I talked to Charlie, too--offline, I mean--about your contract. He totally agreed, said they can work something out to make sure you’re paid equally as the others. So--I’ll uh--let you know if he needs anything from you.”

“Oh, awesome, thanks.”

“And, not for nothing, but when Will and I were at the Starbucks near Luft, we--uh--we weren’t talking about like, us.”

You nodded, the corner of your mouth pulled up. “I figured. I mean--if I’m not allowed to talk to my friends about it then I figured you’re not talking to yours.”

He laughed at that, leaned back in his chair and shook his head. You could have sworn you saw a tinge of pink on his cheeks. “Yeah--no, I haven’t told him. Or anyone, for that matter.”

“So what brought me into the scope of conversation?”

He smiled, amused by your curiosity. “I was actually just telling him about the script and how bringing you on board was a good call.”

“Glad you still think that,” you smiled. “Seeing as now we’ve got another season to write.”

He nodded thoughtfully at that, almost like he hadn’t let himself get carried away yet in thoughts of what that meant for you two. He smirked a little when he looked up to meet your eyes. “I’m not mad about that.”

“Me neither,” you said quietly. 

He watched you again for a second. He stood and closed his laptop. For a moment you contemplated stepping forward, pulling him close by his tie or feeling his tongue between your legs.

But you couldn’t read minds and the way your stomach still flipped when he smiled kind of freaked you out. He could acknowledge that it had happened now. Used a plural pronoun to refer to the sex or the sneaking around or the something. Why was he choosing now to pull back?

You smiled over your shoulder when you turned to leave. “Goodnight, Jason.”

“Goodnight,” he called. 

December 20th, 2018

Late. On purpose. 

His apartment was nicer than you expected. A two-bed in Brooklyn with festive lights wrapped around the fake tree in the living room. Dan was already there when you arrived, a drink in hand as he stood from the sofa to greet you. His girlfriend was also in attendance, she complimented the black skirt you wore and laughed about holiday outfits: pantyhose are the worst, glad we finally don’t have to wear them anymore. 

Classic Christmas tunes hummed from a speaker and his furniture was nice--the kind a real adult has. End tables and a fireplace and hardwood floors that your grandmother would call charming. 

It took everything in you to not stare too hard at the pictures he had on the walls. Women--his mom and his sister, decidedly, based on the fact that they all had the same smile. 

Javier had opened the door, said Jason was somewhere inside when you hung your coat on the rack nearby. 

He found you in the kitchen when you were getting a drink, hoping that the night would feel like hanging out with friends. “Hey,” he said. “I didn’t see you come in.”

“Just got here,” you smiled. “Javier found me standing at the door.”

“Outside?” He looked you up and down, didn’t hide the way his eyes sweeped your figure when his brows arched. 

“I had a jacket,” you said. It’s not like your blouse had that deep of a neckline, but you were also glad he noticed. 

“And now you have a drink,” he nodded. 

“And now I’m gonna go talk to everyone else out there,” you nodded towards the living room and smiled. 

“Good plan,” he nodded, his tone playful. “I’ll find you later.”

You laughed a little, nodded dramatically as if you were in on the joke: “I’m sure you will!”

So he eyed you for a while from across the room when you joked with Dan’s girlfriend about being the only intern. Victoria was friendly and smiled when Jennie joined the two of you by the tree. 

Jennie asked about holiday plans and empathized with your disdain for the upcoming travel. She sipped a martini but managed to trap you in a hallway as you returned from the bathroom later in the evening.

“Hey,” she cooed, an arm around your shoulders as she fell into step with you. “I wanted to chat with you for a second.”

“Yeah, what’s up?” You offered a small smile, confused by the way she suddenly acted like your closest pal. 

“I might be totally crazy, but, uh—I just wanted to ask you—there’s nothing going on between you and Jason, right?”

You stopped dead in your tracks, a quick but awkward laugh when your brain panicked. Deny, lie, shake your head or something!!!!!

“Oh my god, no!” You shook your head quickly, more laughter to really sell it. 

She laughed too, nodded with you like it was all just a joke. “Okay, yeah—no, I figured! I just, I know you guys are close and I almost felt like I interrupted something on Halloween.” 

“No, no,” you shook your head seriously. “You didn’t—Jennie, I’m really sorry you thought that. I was there because I was freaked out about an assignment and wanted to hand it in and get it over with. That was just me being obnoxious about school stuff.”

“No, yeah, I get it,” she nodded, still smiling like this had somehow been a moment of bonding.

You almost felt guilty for lying, for how easily she believed your story. But then she smiled a little less, almost like she was nervous and suddenly shy. 

“Do you know—uh—is he seeing anyone?”

Your mouth formed an ‘o’ when your eyebrows rose, amused by the plot twist you should have seen coming. 

“Oh, uh—I don’t think he is.” 

“Okay—I might, I don’t know, ask him for coffee, then.”

You nodded. “Okay, yeah!”

She laughed and let you head for the bathroom, you giggled to yourself and typed a text to Jason.

Y/N L/N (9:35pm): Remind me to tell you something later.

You dried your hands on the towel, opened the door to find him on the other side. 

“It’s weird to wait to use the bathroom at your own house,” he commented, a genuine nod when he shared this with you.

“I just texted you,” you laughed, a glance over his shoulder to see if the coast was clear. You tugged him inside the bathroom and shut the door. 

He laughed but then looked down at you, eager to know why you needed privacy. 

“I just talked to Jennie and—just, remind me to tell you about it later. I can’t tell you now.”

“What?” He frowned. “You have to tell me!”

“I can’t!” You shrugged. “It’d be weird. I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

He narrowed his eyes for a second, then nodded. “Fine.”

“I promise I’ll tell you,” you nodded, hand on the door as you took a few steps backwards. He smiled down at you, the one he usually gave you before he closed the space between you. 

So you went back out to the kitchen and refilled your drink, found Javier in the living room with his wife and chatted about their baby.

Eventually someone pulled out a joint, people moved towards the balcony and when you stood in the doorway, Jennie took a puff.

She handed it to Dan who took one and then handed it to you. Laughter and distraction when you brought it up to your lips.

“We’re not gonna get in trouble for supplying our intern with drugs, right?” Jennie’s laughter broke through the group, Jason turned to meet your eyes when you held your breath.

You widened your eyes at him, testing your ability to telepathically communicate. At this point in the arc of your relationship (however it would be defined), you figured he had to at least know what you were thinking a little. 

He laughed, had your back: “she’s good, she’s fine!”

You exhaled the hit you’d taken, giggled a little when he winked at you in the darkness of night. Distraction again soon, more laughter as everyone went around and recounted their favorite moment in the script for season one, hugs and congratulations when Javier and his wife called for an Uber. 

Everyone moved inside for another drink, but one by one coats were fetched and people waved. You looked at the clock on the wall, 12:09am. 

“Well, Y/N—I know we’re going to different neighborhoods but do you want to split an uber?”

Jennie’s offer was sweet. And if you weren’t buzzed and moderately high you would have taken her up on it, probably.

Jason watched you from the kitchen as he put an appetizer in the fridge. 

“I actually just called one, 8 minutes away—I’m going to a friend’s place.”

Not true. She nodded, stood from the couch and smiled. “Oh, what I’d give to be in my twenties and have the night only begin at midnight.”

Jason smirked at that to himself, you caught it but nodded to Jennie when she opened the app on her phone.

“Alright,” she said. “Well, in that case—two minutes away!”

She walked towards the front door and found her jacket, pulled it on over her sweater and smiled at both of you. 

“Congratulations on all of this, guys—we’re kicking a lot of ass!”

“We are,” Jason agreed. 

She hesitated by the door, you watched her smile at Jason but pretended to be busy on your phone—as if you weren’t watching their interaction somewhat territorially. 

“I’ll see you after the holidays.”

“Yeah,” he nodded.

She slipped out the door and waved to you over her shoulder. Once it was shut, you hurried over to the window by the couch. You had to climb onto it to get a better view, your heels dangled off the edge when you peered out and into the street. 

“Dude,” you turned around and smirked at Jason. 

“How high are you?” He laughed a little, a few steps towards you to follow your line of sight. 

“Jennie’s into you.”

“What?” He pulled his head back in confusion. “How do you know that?”

“She cornered me near the bathroom and asked if there was something between us!”

“Us?” His brows rose on his face, a lazy finger between both of your chests when he came to stand behind you.

“Mhm,” you nodded but turned to look out the window again. You watched her slide into the backseat of a gray Toyota. “And I reassured her that there’s nothing between us and as it turns out,” you turned around now and sat on the couch, confident that she’d be speeding away from his apartment before you finished your sentence. “She wants to ask you on a date.”

He laughed now, looked down at you from his spot in the middle of his living room. You might have been under the influence, but you could tell he was smiling at you, not your story.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You narrowed your eyes at him. “Are we not going to acknowledge that Jennie is into you and I totally knew it.”

He shook his head, laughed at your excited tone. “So did you actually call an uber or was that your attempt to cockblock me and Jennie?”

“I was not cockblocking,” you made a face, stood from the couch and walked over to the bowl of chips that was still on the counter. “I was merely waiting for a second alone with you to give you fair warning, so you’re welcome. This is what I had to tell you earlier.”

He watched you the entire time: watched as you walked by, reached a hand for a chip and then bit into it. You shrugged, the truth spilled out into the air between you: “But I’m not actually going to a friend’s, I just didn’t want to share an uber with her and listen to her talk about you.”

“Ah,” he nodded, coming over to stand beside you at his island. “Jealousy strikes.”

You coughed at his words, swallowed your bite and stared up at him. “I’m not jealous.”

“No?” He smirked.

“No,” you said quickly, confidently. “You’re allowed to sleep with whoever you want to sleep with or date whoever you want to date and I have no thoughts on the matter,” you rambled a little. 

Alright, fine, you were definitely high. And apparently this high version of you liked to lie through her teeth. You looked up at him and tried to ignore the way he smiled down at you. 

“You’re baked.”

“I am,” you agreed, a laugh when he went over to the cupboard and filled a glass with water from the sink. 

“Here.”

One sip. Quiet. 

“Are you gonna get coffee with her?”

He smiled, leaned on the island and watched as you set it down. “I don’t think so, no.”

“Why not?”

He shrugged. “I just don’t--I’m not into her, I guess.”

“Hmm.”

He smirked up at you. 

“Good.”

“Good?”

“That’d be weird,” you said honestly, the words coming out with much less of a filter than usual. 

“Because you’re jealous?” He tested again.

“No,” you rolled your eyes. “I can think you’re cute and not be jealous that some woman wants to have coffee with you.”

“You think I’m cute?” He asked playfully, another glance up at you when you took another handful of chips. 

“Plenty of people are cute,” you dismissed him, a roll of your eyes when you realized you’d said too much. “You’re not special.”

“Got it,” he laughed again. “Just clarifying, you know--seeing as you get incredibly wet for me whenever I touch you.”

Your heart was in your throat, the weed made everything move slower when he took a step around the island and watched you bite into another chip. You were nervous, turned on by the way he smirked at you and teased you with his words. 

“And seeing as you just totally faked calling an uber to be the last one at my house.”

Caught. You swallowed, giggled a little when you shrugged, pushing yourself up to sit on his counter. 

“I know how to get what I want.”

“Oh, I know,” he nodded, putting a hand on either side of your thighs, leaning closer to you. “If you weren’t good at getting what you wanted we wouldn’t be crossing so many lines.”

Okay. He was high too. Or drunk, or something. You kept your eyes on his for a moment. There was no way that he was sober after what you counted to be three drinks and two hits. And he certainly wouldn’t be casually acknowledging the lines crossed, if he wasn’t, right?

“Speaking of that, by the way--”

“Us having sex?”

“Yeah,” he laughed at your bluntness.

At least now you could say it outloud. 

“I’m sorry that I kind of--I don’t know--pulled back after Halloween. I just--I could tell you were upset and I’ve been stressed with the script and work and…just the whole time in general about accidentally making you uncomfortable at all because this is so--”

He dropped your gaze, looked down at the floor when he searched for the word. 

“Risky?”

He let a huff of air out through his nose, amused at your word choice when he looked up at you. “Yeah.”

“You mean sleeping with a student isn’t all fun and games?”

“I mean, most of it is,” he flirted. “But it’s also hard to figure out which lines can be crossed and which ones can’t.”

“I see,” you nodded. “Ground rules. Right. What do you think they should be?”

He chuckled a little at that, pushed his lips out in thought and let his head sway from side to side. You tried to not be turned on. 

“Well, if we can help ourselves, limited sex on campus.”

You giggled. “Okay.”

“We definitely need to keep acting like student and professor even if that line’s a little blurred already.”

“Yes sir,” you nodded.

He rolled his eyes at that but you kept talking.

“We’ll keep it fun, try to keep it from getting too messy.”

He smirked now, like that’s what he was hoping you’d say. “It is fun.”

You hopped off the counter, took his hand and pulled him down the hall and into his bedroom. You kissed him and giggled when he tossed your blouse across the room, pressing his lips to your skin when you crawled into bed.

“This is a nice mattress,” you said honestly, he smiled down at you when he hovered above. 

“I think so too.”

You reached up and started at the top button, making your way down as you spoke. 

“I wasn’t trying to cockblock,” you said. “But I see why it looks that way.”

“It looks incredibly like cockblocking,” he chided. 

“I didn’t stay here tonight to get some action just like you didn’t walk me home that night to get to a blow job.”

“So you did stay here to get laid?” He smirked when you finished the last button, a subtle admission when you giggled again.

You pushed it off, reached for his belt buckle. 

No noise requirements this time, meaning you were free to be as loud as you wanted when he thrusted into you. His bed creaked a little when you straddled him and held onto the headboard.

His hands reached around to hold onto your ass when you moved against him. You floated into an orgasm, comfortable and content atop the sheets when you looked over at him.

“I should go,” you said, a regretful smile when you pulled away.

“You--uh--don’t have to,” he said quickly, almost like the words tumbled out of his mouth accidentally. “I mean, if you wanted to stay—that’s fine.”

“Hmm,” you narrowed your eyes, a lilt of hesitation in your words: “So much for not crossing a line.”

He rolled his eyes playfully, a laugh before he confessed: “crossing a line was like—September.”

So you stayed.

December 25th, 2018

Dan Simons (10:42am): Merry Christmas everyone!

Jennie Whang (10:46am): Merry merry!

Y/N L/N (11:01am): Merry Christmas! Hope y’all have a great day!

Javier Perez (11:12am): Y/N with the midwestern talk! Have a great day guys, Merry Christmas!

Jason Sudeikis (11:23am): Merry Christmas!

January 3rd, 2019

To: Y/N L/N, Jennie Whang, Javier Perez, Dan Simons

From: Jason Sudeikis

Subject: return

Hi guys, happy 2019!

We’re set to head back to 30 Rock next week for brainstorms of season 2. Talked with Charlie and the others, contracts will be there for us first week and any questions can go directly to him. Let me know if you guys need anything but otherwise, looking forward to diving in on Tuesday!

JS

__

Prof. Jason Sudeikis, PhD

Cinema Studies, NYU Tisch

Office hours M/W 10am-12pm or by appointment

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AN: OKAY!!!!!! CHAPTER 11, YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. Next chappie is A NEW SEMESTER, A NEW YEAR, and THE YEAR MC WILL GRADUATE. What could possible happen (or go wrong?) in the next few months??????

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[aion-rsa]

How Final Destination Went From Real-Life Premonition to Horror Phenomenon

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The year 2000 was a scary one for horror films and not always in a good way.  

While American Psycho and The Cell offered up visually striking nihilistic thrills to genre fans, the majority of horror movies released at the dawn of the new millennium were at best forgettable and, at worst, lamentable – yes, we’re looking at you, Leprechaun in the Hood.  

This was the year of duff sequels like Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2, Urban Legends: Final Cut and, though it is painful to admit, Scream 3. Horror fans were screaming out for something different, something exciting. They found it with Final Destination.  

Discarding the stalk-and-slash thrills that had enjoyed a revival in the years following the release of Scream, Final Destination centered on a group of high schoolers who end up avoiding a fatal plane crash thanks to a premonition, only to discover there is no escaping death’s plan as one by one they are offed in a variety of brilliantly inventive “accidents”.  

Released in March of that year, Final Destination was a sleeper hit with word-of-mouth helping the film to clean up at the box office, earning $112 million off a $23 million budget with more than half of that coming internationally.  

To date, it has spawned four sequels as well as a variety of novelisations and comic book spin-offs while a franchise reboot is also on the horizon.  

Read more

Movies

The Final Destination Movies, Ranked

By Sarah Dobbs

Jeffrey Reddick has worked on several films during his career to date but he’s probably best known as the creator of Final Destination. It’s something he has come to terms with.  

“It’s probably going to end up on my gravestone, it’s such an ironic title,” he tells Den of Geek.  

“Sometimes I’ll be out and I will hear someone say ‘you just had a Final Destination moment’ and it will make me smile. The whole thing just took on a life of its own.”  

Nightmarish Origins  

A screenwriter and director, Reddick recalls how his neighbors in rural Jackson, Kentucky, would laugh when his six-year-old self would tell them about his plans to work in the movie business.   

An avid writer and reader of Greek and Roman mythology, he recalls spending his formative years watching horror movies with his friends. His mother was only too happy to indulge his burgeoning interest too, knowing it kept him out of trouble elsewhere.  

Reddick’s life began to change after he saw A Nightmare on Elm Street.   

“That film cemented my love of horror. I was this 14-year-old hillbilly from Kentucky but I decided I was going to write a prequel. I went home, banged it out on my typewriter and sent it to Bob Shaye.”  

The legendary head of New Line Cinema initially dismissed Reddick’s draft out of hand, returning it with a note explaining the studio did not “accept unsolicited material.”  

Undaunted, Reddick sent the script back with a note telling him “Look mister, I spent three dollars on your movie and I think you could take five minutes on my story.”  

Shaye was impressed and struck up a bond with the youngster that saw him sending everything from scripts to posters to Reddick during his teenage years.  

When Reddick moved to New York to study acting, age 19, he was offered an internship with New Line, which would become a full-time role despite acting being his “main passion.”  

“Diversity in casting was not a thing at that time,” he recalls.  

“My agent was like ‘I don’t know what to do with you as an actor. We can’t put you up for gangsters or pimps and you don’t rap and you don’t play basketball.”  

“So  I figured, screw it, I will just write stuff and put myself in it.”  

Reddick was present at New Line during their company’s early 90s creative heyday and credits the experience with helping him get Final Destination off the ground.  

“I learned a lot about how to get a movie made. I knew that to make a movie that connected with an audience you had to tap into something that was universal. Death is the ultimate fear.”  

As luck would have it, the idea actually came to Reddick while on a flight back to Kentucky.  

“I read about a woman who was on vacation and her mother told her not to take the flight she was planning to take home as she had a bad feeling about it. The woman changed it and the plane she was supposed to be on crashed.”  

At that point however the idea wasn’t Final Destination. It wasn’t a film either. It was an episode of The X Files.  

The Truth Is Out There  

“I was trying to get a TV agent at the time and they recommended I write a spec script for something already on the air. I was a huge fan of The X Files and thought about a scene where somebody has a premonition and gets off the plane and then it crashes and used that as the plot.”  

“It was going to be Scully’s brother Charles who had the premonition. He gets off the plane with a few other people but they start dying and Charles blacks out every time there is a murder so people suspect he is doing it.   

Read more

TV

I Still Want to Believe: Revisiting The X-Files Pilot

By Chris Longo

“The twist at the end was that the sheriff who had been investigating alongside Mulder and Scully the whole time had actually been shot and flatlined at the same time as the plane crash.  Death brought him back to kill off all the survivors, including Charles.”  

It would have made for a great episode except it was never submitted to The X Files. Reddick showed his spec script to some friends at New Line who were so impressed, they told him to develop it into a treatment for a feature, which was eventually purchased by the studio.  

Producers Craig Perry and Warren Zide were brought onboard to develop the story and set about tweaking his idea.  

“Originally the cast of survivors were adults because I wanted to explore more adult themes but Scream had come out and teenagers were hot again so New Line got me to change it”  

In a twist of fate, two established writers from The X Files, James Wong and Glen Morgan, were brought onboard to rejig Reddick’s script.   

“My version was definitely darker and more like A Nightmare on Elm Street,” he says.  

“In my script, death would torment the kids about some kind of past sin they felt guilty about. They would then die in these accidents that ended up looking like suicides.”  

For example, Todd’s death saw him chased into the family garage by an unseen specter where he accidentally ended up rigged in a noose triggered when his dad opens the automatic garage door.   

Death is all around us  

Ultimately that death scene and several others were ultimately scrapped in favour of what would prove to be the franchise’s calling card.  

Reddick credits Wong and Morgan with coming up with the idea of having the film’s key death scenes kicked off by a Rube Goldberg machine-like chain-reaction that would see everyday things colliding to create a lethal scenario. It was nothing short of a masterstroke.   

“It created this notion that death is all around us,” Reddick says.  

“Death would use everyday things around us. It made it more universal and allowed us to set the deaths in places where people go all the time. The payoff would be fun but it was the build-up that had you on the edge of your seat.”  

There was one major sticking point for the studio though: the presence of death, or rather the lack of.  

“I fought really hard to make sure we never showed death because for me, if you didn’t show it, it could be something someone, no matter their belief system, could project onto our villain. That was a tough sell for the studio. They would be like ‘this doesn’t make any sense, you can’t see it and you can’t fight it’ but that’s the point, it’s death.”  

“Luckily both James Wong and Glen Morgan were very insistent we never show it and tie it in to a specific belief system.”  

Reddick credits the move with helping Final Destination become “an international phenomenon”.  

“It struck a chord with people around the world. It broke out beyond the horror audience.”  

Casting dreams   

When it came to casting, Reddick had a clear idea of who he wanted in the lead roles, even if the studio’s opinion differed drastically.  

“I had a wish list with Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst as my two leads but New Line was like ‘well…’”  

He might not have got his first pick but Final Destination boasted an impressive cast of up-and-comers who had already made waves among teen audiences.   

Devon Sawa had starred in Idle Hands, while Ali Larter was known for Varsity Blues and Kerr Smith was a regular on Dawson’s Creek. There was even room for Seann William Scott, fresh from his breakout turn in American Pie who was drafted in on the recommendation of producer Craig Perry, who told Reddick “you’ve got to get this kid, he’s going to be huge.”  

Even so, Reddick was left a little unhappy.  

“One of the conversations we had early on was like ‘Just remember this is set in New York, which is one of the most diverse cities in the world so let’s make sure we have some diversity in the cast’ and they were like ‘oh we will’ and then there wasn’t anyone who wasn’t white in it.”  

New Line chief Bob Shaye did find a way to make amends on some level at least, casting Candyman horror icon Tony Todd in a cameo role as a mysteriously foreboding mortician.  

“He called me up and said they had got Tony Todd and I flipped out. He is an icon. Such a talented, serious actor.”  

As well as co-write the film, Wong took on directorial duties while each of the film’s death sequences would require careful planning, his first aim was to have the film start with a bang by creating as terrifyingly realistic a plane crash as possible.  

“We want to do for planes and air travel what Jaws did for sharks and swimming,” he declared in one interview.  

Yet the film would later garner criticism for its eerie similarities to the explosion and crash of TWA Flight 800 off East Moriches, Long Island, New York in 1996 where 16 students and five adults died.  

“There was some criticism that the movie was written to exploit this real-life crash,” Reddick recalls.  

“I even realised later they used footage from one real-life crash which I wasn’t particularly happy about.”  

Indeed, much of the news footage shown in the film actually came from the 1996 crash.  

That didn’t stop the film becoming a major hit and spawning a sequel within three years.   

Final Destination meets Game of Thrones  

Reddick returned to write the treatment for Final Destination 2, determined to move the franchise away from its teen Scream origins.   

“We had tapped into that zeitgeist and didn’t have to do that again. I wanted to expand the universe and subvert it, so I had it open by following a bunch of teens who are then killed off.”  

Once again, divine intervention led to divine inspiration for the opening set piece.  

“Originally, I was going to have it open with some kids going to spring break and they stop off at this hotel and there is a fire but the producers were not sure. Writers always say you should go out and live life – life informs you and a lot of inspiration comes out when I go out for a walk.  

“I was driving back to Kentucky to see my family and I got stuck behind a log truck and the idea just came to me. I pulled off the highway and called Craig and was flipping out with this idea for a log truck on a freeway.”  

The resulting freeway pile-up that leads to multiple deaths is one Reddick ranks as his “favourite scene in the entire franchise.”  

“The second film is my favourite. I wanted to create a sequel that didn’t feel like a remake of the first. It went in a more fun direction – but it’s still scary.”  

That first sequel also represented the last of which Reddick was formally involved in, though he remained very much in the loop as the Godfather of the franchise, revealing that producers had been “looking at scripts before Covid hit.” 

He also revealed that, at one point, things looked to be heading in an altogether different and thoroughly fascinating direction.  

“There was talk about setting a Final Destination back in Medieval times. Like Game of Thrones in Final Destination. Craig Perry worked with a writer and they talked about the idea and put a teaser trailer together [which has leaked online].   

“I would go and see that movie in a heartbeat but the studio said that the reason Final Destination was so popular was that element of deaths in normal, everyday situations.”  

Future Destinations  

Reddick hasn’t given up on a return to the franchise though, hinting at a “unique” idea he has for a new film that is simply too good to reveal yet.   

In the meantime, he has been busy writing and directing Don’t Look Back, a film that shares some surface similarities with Final Destination and is painfully relevant to society today.  

“It’s a mystery thriller about a group of people who witness someone getting fatally assaulted in a park and don’t help the person and somebody films them and puts it online. The public turns on the witnesses and someone or something is coming after them.”  

Eager to make more horror films and celebrate diversity in his work, Reddick remains immensely proud of Final Destination and the impact it has had on audiences.  

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“It’s cool. To have one movie that is going to be talked about after you die is a life goal. If that’s what I leave behind as a legacy that’s enough – but I still want more.” 

Don’t Look Back is available on DVD & Digital from 14th June

The post How Final Destination Went From Real-Life Premonition to Horror Phenomenon appeared first on Den of Geek.

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#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

[amillionsmiles]

get myself together, spend you all of my money (Ellie/Aster)

Title: get myself together, spend you all of my money Summary: “You’d think going to college out of town would have knocked us both down a peg, but instead we ended up pretty pretentious.” / or: Ellie, Aster, and an apartment full of things. A/N: written while listening to Mitski’s cover of “Let’s Get Married” on loop.

[Read and review here] or continue under the cut.

*

Ellie finds Aster Flores again on a Sunday.

So far, the NYC Sublets & Apartments Facebook group has yielded more duds than leads, but she scrolls down and suddenly, there: a corner of Squahamish, waving at her from the screen.

LOOKING FOR: Room to rent, ideally available by August. Recently graduated from art school, so that gives you a sense of my budget, but I’m tidy, respectful, and play well with cats. Any PMs with leads appreciated!  

The profile picture isn’t anything new; Ellie’s pretty sure she scrolled past it and liked it a few weeks ago during the influx of everyone’s graduation photo updates. Aster’s looking over her shoulder at the camera, the quiet joke that always seemed to hide in her eyes in high school now more pronounced. It’s a good picture, from a purely aesthetic standpoint, and that’s the only reason her heartrate picks up when she hovers over Aster’s name to click Message.

She takes a swig from her iced cappuccino and starts to type.

Hey! Long time, less conversation. Haven’t been to church in a minute, but I remember there being a Bible verse saying something about “two are better than one,” and I’m pretty sure that also applies to apartment-hunting. If that seems like something you’d be interested in, let me know.  

Before she can think twice about it, she hits enter.

*

They move in together in July, when the summer heat turns the air liquid and the acrid smell of molten trash bags wafts from the street. For a second, Ellie misses the Pacific Northwest: the greenish tint of light filtered through leaves, the way she could disappear to a nearby watering hole for respite. Even the mudding that Trig and his friends did now seems appealing—on the stairwell, she fantasizes about the cool shock of it against her skin.

“Hey, Ellie?”

Ellie turns from where she’s been sitting on the top step to see that Aster’s finally gotten the door open. Rocking to her feet, she pushes the cardboard box across the floor, stepping inside to get a look at where they’ll be living for the next year.

The first room is spacious, combining a kitchen area with what can become a living room, once they buy a couch. Trailing her fingers along the wall, Ellie wanders into the other bedroom, then tests the lights in the bathroom. She comes back to find Aster eyeing the ceiling, a hammer pulled from her belongings.

“What are you doing?”

“Here.” Aster beckons her closer. “I’m thinking that this space is big enough that if we hang a curtain, part of it can be my room.”

“Oh.” Ellie hadn’t put much thought into it when they’d signed the lease, assuming they’d share the back room, like a college one-room double situation. It seems naïve, now; they’re adults, of course Aster would want her own space. “It doesn’t have to be yours, though. I mean—we can flip a coin or something, to make it fairer.”

Aster shrugs. “I don’t mind. Besides, the back room is more muffled—I’m less likely to hear you clacking your typewriter this way.” She smiles, the two of them both glancing to where Ellie’s Smith Corona peeks out from its bubble wrap packaging, the pale blue paint gleaming in the sunlight.

“It was my mom’s,” Ellie explains, her own memory fond against her lips.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I always wanted to hear more about her, after that time at the spring.”

“She was fun.” The words take her back to Ping-Pong, Paul’s paddle thwacking the ball against the wall.

“As fun as you are?”

Ellie raises an eyebrow. “Am I fun?”

Aster pushes a sweaty lock of hair behind her ear. Overhead, the air conditioning hums.

“Guess we have plenty of time to find out, heathen.”

*

“Saw is not the greatest horror movie of our generation.”

“It is!” protests Aster, sitting next to her on the couch. Waxy cartons from the Georgian restaurant Aster waitresses at litter the table, and Ellie licks her fingers clean of the buttery residue from the kubdari—mm, delicious—as she leans back, waiting for Aster to continue.

“Ignore the sequels. But on its own, it’s this brilliant little clockwork machine of the lengths people will go to when they think they’ve got no time left. And the reveal at the end? I heard you gasp.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that, but a lot of the rest of it feels like torture porn.”

Aster rolls her eyes. “No one watches a horror movie for the butterflies.”

“Except you, apparently,” Ellie points out, because this is a thing they do as roommates, now: watch movies and then discuss them over takeout. So far, they’ve tended toward foreign cinema, art-house, and horror. The last genre is the one Aster engages with most fervently. However, Ellie has started to suspect that Aster can turn nearly anything into a debate, perhaps a side effect of all the time she spent wrestling with God in her head during sermons.

“Whatever. I just don’t think you’re giving it the credit it deserves for how well it feeds on the psyches of all the characters.”

“Cupid and Psyche,” Ellie thinks aloud. “Now there’s a story we could talk about.”

Crinkling her nose, Aster says, “We get it, you read literature.”

“So do you,” says Ellie, nudging her foot. “You’re just as big a nerd as I am.”

At that, Aster laughs, tilting her head back. It makes the column of her throat into the soft marble of a Canova statue.

“You’d think going to college out of town would have knocked us both down a peg, but instead we ended up pretty pretentious.”

Looking around their apartment, Ellie has to agree. There are too many stacks of books lying around, various papers jutting out of them as placeholders so she can flip to the passages she needs when writing essays. Aster keeps bringing back abstract art prints from the showcases she attends. In the corner, there’s a ficus that Ellie took home from work out of guilt (she’d been the only one in the office watering it) which they’ve named Walter Benjamin.

“I kind of like it, though.”

Aster turns to her, cheek pressing against the fabric of the couch. Her gaze is a paperweight: glassy and clear and heavy with something Ellie can’t quite name. “I’m not complaining, either.”

*

Before college, Ellie had considered herself a morning person, simply because she had no reason to be otherwise. Waking up to signal the trains each morning became part of her biorhythm, as natural and unremarkable as her middle part or her thermal underwear. At Grinnell, though, she’d discovered the guilty joy of sleeping in. The downside has been that her body now relies on coffee to function before 10 AM on the weekends.

“Don’t drink that,” says Aster, whisking the tin away from Ellie’s grasp. “I’ve been using it to wash off my brushes.”

Groggily, Ellie leans against the counter, watching Aster bend over the canvas on the kitchen table. She must have been at it for a while—a good third of it is filled in, streaked with purples and browns. After dabbing at a corner, Aster blows a strand of hair out of her face and straightens, reaching to adjust her messy bun.

Ellie squints. “Have you always had that?”

Pausing, Aster feels along the shaved part of her hair, tracing the chevron indented in it. “The undercut? Yeah. A girlfriend did it for me senior year, before we went our separate ways.”

A spike akin to a dose of caffeine shoots through Ellie. She stands a bit taller. “A girlfriend like a girl…?” she trails off, clearing her throat. “Or. A friend.”

The corner of Aster’s mouth twitches. “The first one.”

“Oh. Um.” Ellie swallows. “That’s nice.”

Aster picks up another paintbrush, twirling it between her fingers before deciding against it and setting it back down. When she meets Ellie’s eyes again, the look behind them is bare, vulnerable.

“I haven’t told my parents, though.”

“Is that why you don’t go back to Squahamish?”

Aster’s lips part slightly. “You noticed?”

“The first summer, yeah,” Ellie admits. “After that, I wasn’t around much either. Internships and stuff, you know.”

“And relationships?”

“Some of those, too.”

“Did you seduce all of them wearing flannel?” Aster asks, nodding to the oversized checkered shirt Ellie favors as pajamas. For a second, Ellie just gapes, taken aback by being so thoroughly called out.

“You’re the one with an undercut. Don’t talk to me about queer signaling.”

Aster laughs. It suddenly becomes very important that Ellie turn around and start the coffee machine, right now.

“I like seeing you with your hair down, though,” comes Aster’s voice, drifting over the sound of water straining into a pot.

*

“—And then I thought, what if it’s a temperature thing?” finishes Paul, his face ruddy and proud through the screen. Sensing an opening, Ellie stops worrying the inside of her mouth.  

“Did you know Aster likes girls? Like, officially?” Almost immediately, she cringes from how juvenile her delivery makes her sound.

Paul doesn’t so much as twitch. “Uh, yeah. It’s come up once or twice.”

“Wait, she’s talked about it with you?” Ellie sits up on her mattress. Since when were Paul and Aster confidantes?

“Yeah. Sorry I didn’t say anything, it’s just I read all this stuff about not outing people before they were ready, and I figured if it was important enough to her she’d let you know eventually. Uh, Ellie, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Blinking rapidly, Ellie fights the surge of affection threatening to overtake her. Stupid Paul, making her stupidly proud to have him as a best friend.

“Do you—er. Do you think you might like her?”

“Oh, god, no. And I mean it for real this time,” she says, meeting Paul’s skeptical look. Part of it is pride—it seems like character regression, to return to the source of her teenage fantasies when she’s learned so much about herself since then. “It’s just nice to have a friend who gets both parts of it, you know? The being queer and being from Squahamish.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. Hey, do you guys want a batch of these sausages when I finish tinkering with the recipe? It takes two days to ship cross-country, I checked.”

Ellie laughs. “Yeah, Munsky, send them our way.”  

*

Ellie wets the edges of the dough tucked in her palm, working from the outside in as she crimps the dumpling and places it on a plate. Across from her, Aster works with similar dexterity, a pink sliver of tongue poking out the side of her mouth in concentration.

“You’re good at this.”

Aster sets aside another dumpling, using two fingers to scoop a mound of dough from the bowl between them. “Yeah, I helped my mom a lot with her empanadas, growing up.”

“Say you had kids,” Ellie starts. “What’s one thing you’d teach them, before they turned thirteen?”

Aster considers. “Long division. Except I’d have to get someone else to teach them, because I’m terrible at math.”

“Really?”

“Really. Do you ever think about how smart people have been, to invent the concept of infinity and the concept of zero?”

“Mm. And where would you put the idea of God on that scale?”

“Like, a solid fifty,” says Aster, flicking water at her face.

*

In November, Ellie publishes a short story in the New Yorker, which Aster crows about for a solid week.

“Aster, oh my god, you’re being embarrassing,” she says upon walking into the kitchen and finding her story printed in full, each sheet pinned to the refrigerator door with a bright red magnet.

“You should be proud,” Aster insists.

Paul calls her to discuss it. “Me and your dad read it. I thought it was really good. Are you working on more stuff?”

“Slow your roll, Munsky.” Ellie laughs. “I’m not as prolific as you are, dreaming up new sausage combinations every day.”

Off-camera, the staticky sound of a TV and a faint Ellie? sounds.

“Here, Mr. Chu.” Paul passes the phone to her dad, who is wrapped in his usual robe. The lines by his eyes relax when he sees her face.

“How are you?” she asks in Mandarin. “Are you keeping warm?”

“You should be worried about yourself—it’s colder where you are,” her dad replies. “Paul’s good about keeping me company. He read your piece to me three times. The scene with the swing set, and the little girl…” He switches to English. “Best part. Your mom would be proud.”

“Thanks, Ba,” says Ellie, voice thick. She goes to bed that night and dreams of being sandwiched between her mom and dad, dancing in the living room.

*

She and Aster host a small get-together in December. They put a Santa hat on Walter Benjamin and get everyone drunk on mulled wine until the party devolves into a caroling session, Aster’s friend James competing with Ellie’s friend Larissa to see who can belt “O Holy Night” louder. Afterwards, she and Aster sprawl on Aster’s mattress, limbs loosened from a successful night. The string lights Aster wound through the curtains as decoration for the party flicker, casting the room a soft gold.

“Would you ever get a tattoo?” Ellie asks. It’s been on her mind ever since she noticed the olive branch inked above Larissa’s collarbone. She’s wary of the pain, though.

Beside her, Aster shifts, arm pressing against hers. “I have one, actually.”

“What, really?”

“Yeah.” She props herself up on an elbow, pulling her shirt up to reveal a cluster of flowers just below her rib.

Tracing the lines with her eyes, Ellie asks, “What kind of flowers are they?”

“Asters.”

“You’re joking.”

Aster looks straight back at her. “I’m 100% serious.”

“Isn’t that a bit too on the nose?” Ellie studies the tattoo again and then snorts, shaking her head. “I can’t believe it.” The wine must still be in her system, because the fuzziness of a laugh flushes through her body.

“What?” Aster seems miffed. “Ellie, what’s so funny?”

“Nothing, I’m just— You were so reserved before, and now you’ve got an undercut and a tattoo and. Do you remember— there was that day when Jenny Newman brought in that pink scarf and you all walked down the hallway like something out of a Clique movie, it was ridiculous. I can’t believe I had a crush on you. Oh my god.”

“Stop.” Aster shoves her shoulder, but she’s laughing, too. “Don’t remind me. God. God! What a terrible color, it didn’t match my outfit at all.”

“But it’s okay, because now you’re Aster Flores, hardcore.”

“Well, what about you, Ellie Chu?”

“What what about me?”

Aster sits up. “You’re walking into a tattoo parlor right now. What do you decide to get, and where?”

“Persimmons,” Ellie says, before even fully conceiving the thought. “On my… right shoulder.”

“All right.” Aster gets up and feels around her desk; the next thing Ellie knows, she’s kneeling before her on the mattress, a fine-tipped pen in hand. “I’ll draw it for you.”

“Okay.” Slowly, Ellie sits up, tugging the collar of her shirt down as far as it’ll go to expose the skin needed for Aster’s canvas. The first touch tickles; she tries to hold herself as still as possible while Aster draws, ink flowing in thin lines. She considers watching the process, but it makes her go cross-eyed and dizzy, so she closes her eyes instead and feels: the smoothness of a persimmon skin, the shine of their texture, the sweet crunch of a fruit just barely ripened.

“Done,” Aster whispers, and Ellie leans closer to catch it. It feels like they’re in a confessional booth. Aster caps the pen and bites her lip, but she doesn’t move away.

“Ellie—” Her breath smells of cinnamon and cloves. Like the sharpest part of the forest, like all things good and lovely and too fragile to want.

“I should go to bed,” Ellie says, and it takes every ounce of strength she has to extract herself, to stumble back to her room and sit against the closed door, shaking.

*

“Ellie? Ellie, pick up the phone. It’s about your dad. It’s not—super critical, or anything, but I still think—uh. Just… call me back as soon as you can.”

*

Her carry-on is by the door and she’s set to leave for the airport in an hour. When Aster finds her, she’s cutting and skinning apples in the kitchen—not even to eat, just to have something to do with her hands.

Silently, Aster pulls out some bread, cream cheese, and salmon. When she’s done with the sandwich, she slips it into a plastic bag and holds it out to Ellie.

“For the plane ride.”

“Thanks.” Ellie sets down the knife and goes to put the sandwich away in her backpack. She zips it up.

“Would you come with me, if I asked?”

By the sink, Aster is quiet. Ellie thinks of that awful moment in the ping pong room, when she’d thought Paul had caught on to her.

“You know what, never mind.”

“If I go with you, I’m going to want to be with you.” Aster looks down at her hands as she says it; it’s the first time she’s seemed uncertain in a while. Ellie soaks in the confession, turning it over in her head. It’s brave. It’s honest.

It’s not enough.

“I just.” Aster shrugs, helpless. “I’m not ready for that conversation, yet. With them. For the fallout of what the worst could be.”

Pick me, her heart throbs, selfishly. Pick me pick me pickme. She is a train leaving the station, hoping for someone to catch her. But no time to wait; her dad needs her.

“Take care, Aster,” she says, shrugging her backpack over her shoulder. Aster’s face crumples like snow. Ellie tries not to look back.

*

The hospital discharges her dad after a week. Ellie stays for another two, making sure his cough is gone and all the mucus has loosened from his chest. When he regains enough energy to start fighting back against her fussing, she recruits Paul to make sure he drinks enough fluids every day.

“Pneumonia,” she scolds at the doorway, shaking her head. “Don’t ever scare me like that again!”

“Ch,” her dad says. “You want to talk about scared? How about that time when you were seven and fell off the monkey bars? Nearly cracked your head open.”

Paul looks between them, bewildered. “Okay, Mr. Chu, I’ve gotta get Ellie to the airport. There’s still ice on the roads so driving will be slower than usual.”

In the car, Ellie holds her hands to the heat, touching the pads of her fingertips to each other.

“Do you like it better out east?”

Ellie tilts her head. “City life is different, that’s for sure. It feels freer and lonelier. Not as many people paying attention to you, so you can be anything you want to be. But also: not as many people paying attention to you.”

“Hm, I get that. Like being at my house versus being at yours.”

“You’re saying that the Munskys are New York City and me and my dad are Squahamish?”

“Never mind. I guess my house has all the people New York has, but they’re all jumping down your throat instead of passing you by.”

Ellie laughs. “You love it, though.”

Across the dash, Paul smiles at her. “Yeah, I do.”

“You wouldn’t consider the Midwest? It’d be a happy medium.”

“I did like Iowa, when I visited you.”

“Chicago, then,” Ellie proposes. “In five years. People there buy lots of hot dogs—it’d be good business.”

“I’ll think about it,” Paul promises, pulling up to the curb. He gets out to help with her suitcase, wrapping her in a warm hug. Ellie buries her nose into the center of his chest and inhales. She wonders if it's possible to absorb his courage through her lungs.

“Paul?” she asks, when he starts to pull away. “Can I ask you something?”

His eyes are bright with concern. “Of course.”

“If you loved someone, and they loved you back in the same way, but they said you couldn’t be together, what would you do?”

“Well, I’d ask myself: when I picture being with that person, what does it really look like? Is it okay if the image doesn’t exactly match up? Because then I’d hold on.”

“Never Let Me Go.”

“What?”

“It’s another Kazuo Ishiguro book,” says Ellie, smiling. “You should read it if you get the time.”

“All right, boss,” says Paul, mock-saluting her. “Now go catch your flight.”

*

It’s past midnight when she gets back to the apartment, careful not to make too much noise as she slips past Aster’s room and into her bed. Her head is about to hit the pillow when her phone screen lights up, casting her as a glaring shadow against the bedroom wall.

Aster: Hey, heard you come in. Is your dad okay?

Yeah. I sentenced him to house arrest for the month, with Paul as guard dog.

Aster: All right, Foucault. Discipline & Punish. Aster: I’m glad he’s better, though.

Thanks. Did you miss me much?

Aster: Well, I realized that the cookies disappear at a much slower rate when you’re not around. :P

It’s strange to be talking like this when they’re separated by only a hallway, when for the past six months they’ve seen each other face-to-face every day. And yet, in some ways it’s easier: the crackle of electricity, the dots appearing, then fading, then appearing again.

Aster: Can you come into the hall? Aster: There’s something I want to say.

Ellie sits up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. Gently, she cracks open the door to see Aster leaning against the wall opposite the bathroom. Her hair is tangled. She looks beautiful.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Sliding down to the floor, Aster gestures to the spot opposite her. “Sit.”

Dutifully, Ellie obeys, bringing her knees to her chest and resting her chin atop them. The hallway is so narrow that her toes end up tucked under Aster’s legs, crisscrossed in front of her.

“I’ve been thinking about what I said to you right before you left,” says Aster. “And I did some more thinking while I was here alone. And the thing is, I don’t want to be all or nothing with you. I want us to be—something. And I’m wondering if you could be okay with that. If we could take it little by little, and just figure it out as it comes. If you’re willing to wait.”

“Yeah.” Ellie swallows. “We can do that.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.” Nodding, Ellie starts to rise, but Aster gets a determined look in her eyes and suddenly she’s swooping forward, the scent of her hair—vanilla and violets—swinging around them, her hand cupping Ellie’s cheek and her mouth a bright star against Ellie’s, striking deep as a hymn into her bones. Ellie counts to five before opening her eyes, and when she speaks, her voice is hoarse.

“I thought you wanted me to wait.”

“Guess I’m bad at following my own rules,” Aster says, and grins.

#the half of it #ellie chu #aster flores #ellie x aster #my writing #fanfiction #ff: the half of it

[stupidsexyfandom]

Armistice

@helsa-summer-event

Rated T // Drama, Modern AU

The gang engage in a classic beat-the-heat activity for people who don’t have central air: going to the movies.

Written for Prompt #5 of Helsa Summer: We’re cool in the summer. 

“Come to the movies with me and Kristoff.”

“I thought you said it was too hot to do anything?” Hans smiled against the phone. He had long ceased to be surprised by Anna calling him up out of the blue to hang out, despite their messy breakup a year before. What he was not expecting was to be invited on a movie date with her new boyfriend. Something else had to be going on.

“I meant that it was too hot to do anything else. The theaters are air-conditioned, and the matinee tickets are cheap. Plus, I hear they have those deluxe reclining seats.” Anna acted oblivious to his probing. It was more likely that she was deliberately avoiding his unasked question.

“Don’t you have any other friends?” He kept his tone light and teasing.

“Well, yeah, but they’re all couples, and I don’t want Elsa to be uncomfortable. I don’t want her thinking this is a date thing.” Ah, there it was. Translation: Kristoff and I want to participate in the storied summer tradition of making out like teenagers in the dark, and I don’t want Elsa to see. Other couples would surely tip her off.

Hans sighed overdramatically and said, with faux grandiosity, “Fine. I will chaperone the chaperone while you and Kristoff get up to whatever it is you kids get up to these days. All I ask in return is a simple cone of Carvel ice cream, given to me at a prearranged time after the showing.”

“Thanks, gramps. You know, it’s a real wonder that you’re my only single friend.” He could hear Anna giggling through her sarcasm.

“Wonder no longer, for the truth is that I am simply too cool for all of you.”

“Sure, whatever you have to tell yourself. We’re seeing the latest Star Wars. Meet us in the parking lot at 4.”

-

It really is too hot to do anything else, thought Hans as he walked across the parking lot. Heat radiated up from the asphalt, the air shimmering with humidity. He saw the others standing by Kristoff’s truck, looking ready to wilt. Anna and Kristoff were dressed casually, seemingly taking their not-a-date act seriously. Elsa looked overdressed in comparison, out of place in her sleeveless button-up.

“Hey, Hans,” Anna called to him. He raised a hand in greeting. Kristoff gave him a friendly nod, while Elsa made no acknowledgement that she had even seen him.

“Hey, guys. I hope I haven’t kept you waiting?”

“No, we just got here,” said Anna, “Let’s go inside, I can’t stand to be out here any longer.”

They purchased their tickets and made their way to the appointed theater. Kristoff filed into their row first, then Anna, then Hans. Elsa sat next to him at the end of the row. Almost as soon as they had sat down, the lights dimmed.

As the trailers played, Hans was keenly aware of Elsa next to him. She perched on the edge of her seat, ignoring the reclining function. Hans figured he had better do the same so she could not look past him to the end of the row. She seemed ill at ease. Even in the darkness, he could see her white hands fidgeting out of the corner of his eye. He wondered if she was ever able to relax. Beside him, Kristoff had already pulled Anna into his lap. Their attention was clearly not on the screen. It seemed to Hans this rather defeated the purpose of coming to the movie theater to cool down, but what did he know?

Just after the opening crawl, he heard Elsa hiss, “I’m getting popcorn.” She stood up abruptly. Hans did the same, attempting to shield Kristoff and Anna from view. The sudden movement filled his vision with white. Let it never be said that he did not take his role of chaperone seriously. He followed her out of the theater.

When they reached the lobby, Elsa did not join the concessions line. Instead she kept walking out onto the sidewalk. The sun beat down on them, and Hans was instantly too hot. She whirled to face him, looking irritated.

“Look, I don’t need a babysitter!”

“A babysitter?” Hans feigned innocence.

“I know Anna wasn’t expecting me to say yes when she asked me to come. She thinks that just because I’ve never has a boyfriend, I don’t know what she and Kristoff are up to. I know, and I don’t care. But I do care that you keep hanging around my sister. How dare you, after what you did to her?”

Ah, he should have figured. Anna had never been one to hold a grudge. She may have given him a whopper of a black eye, but they had managed to awkwardly patch up their differences. It might even be said that they were now friends. Elsa was a different story. She had always come off as restrained, but Hans had suspected that a quiet intensity lay beneath the surface. The thrill of being proven right paled in comparison to the discomfort of being the recipient of her ire.

“Anna invited me here. We’ve worked things out.”

“Unfortunately for both of us, Westergaard, Anna is a far better person than I will ever be. That’s why you need to stay away from her!” A few wisps of hair had escaped from Elsa’s updo. They glowed golden in the light of the late afternoon sun. It struck him that she was very beautiful when she was angry, but he pushed the thought away. For one thing, Elsa was always beautiful. For another, that information was really, really not helpful or relevant right then.

“I’m sorry about what I did to her— to both of you. I can’t tell you how sorry I am. But all I can do is try to be better and to leave the past in the past. I hope you can give me that chance.”

“This isn’t about me. I can leave behind your petty games. I can leave behind the way you tried to snipe that internship out from under me. I can even forget how you spread rumors that I was having a nervous breakdown and should be ejected from the program.” Hans wanted to retort that the rumors had mostly been spread by Duke Weselton, and anyway, wasn’t the nervous breakdown thing true? But the past year had taught him that sometimes the snappiest response was not the best one. Half the battle of becoming a nicer person was just keeping his mouth shut.

Instead he said, “But you did get that internship. All I got was academic probation, which I’ve only now been removed from. I’m sorry that I hurt you, but I don’t know what else I can do.”

“I told you, I’m over it. But I can’t leave behind the way you used my sister because you thought our name would further your career. I can’t forget how cruel you were when you dumped her. And I’ll never forget how you left her at that party afterwards, drunk and alone. She could have died! Thank God Kristoff was there. He had to take her to the ER!” Elsa’s voice had risen, the tension between them as palpable as the humid air. Hans felt his own temper coming to a boil. His flaw in arguments had always been escalating to match the other person.

“I didn’t realize it was her first college party, and I certainly didn’t realize she had drunk so much! Yes, I shouldn’t have said those things to her. But it’s not like I was her only reason to get wasted. You never did her any good. She was so lonely because you were never around! She was always telling me how you never answered her calls. She invited you that night, and for once she thought you were really going to come. But you weren’t there!” Hans regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth. If half of not being a jerk was shutting up, the other half was taking responsibility for his own actions, and he had just blown both in one shot. Elsa stared up at him with such anguish in her eyes that it almost hurt to look at her. She reacted like an injured wildcat.

“You say that like it makes you any better! Yeah, I may be barely holding it together, and I may be failing Anna in every way that matters! But at least I’m not an asshole like you!” She looked close to the breaking point both physically and emotionally, as if she might collapse at any moment. Hans fought the sudden urge to reach out and comfort her. She might seem helpless in the moment, but he knew she would sooner bite off his head than cry on his shoulder.

“Elsa, I didn’t mean—” But her pain had been replaced by cold fury.

“Save it, Westergaard. I need to cool down. Here’s what’s going to happen. I will leave Anna and Kristoff to their covert activities, and I suggest you do the same. But first, I’m going inside for fifteen seconds to splash some water on my face. When I come back out, you had better not be here.” Elsa’s voice was cool and sharp as ice.

“Don’t you at least want to see the rest of the movie?” said Hans, although he was certain this situation was beyond saving. Elsa gave a harsh laugh.

“Hardly. I read the spoilers online, and I have no desire to watch Kylo Ren get redeemed on the big screen.”

“So you don’t believe in redemption? Not even for love?”

“People don’t change, Westergaard. Not through love, and not through death. Some things can never be forgiven.” And then she was gone, the theater door slammed shut in his face.

Hans did not want to see what would happen if he ignored her directive, so he walked to the grocery store next door. Through the front window, he watched Elsa emerge from the theater and storm into the Carvel across the parking lot. She sat at the counter with only a water, her head in her hands. After watching her for a few minutes, he decided to kill time until the movie ended. He walked up and down every aisle, fantasizing about climbing into a freezer case. The air conditioning and the familiar surroundings eventually calmed him down.

When he felt enough time had passed, he made his way back to the cinema. He slipped into the back row of the theater to catch the tail end of the movie. As the credits rolled, he met up with Anna and Kristoff outside the door to the lobby.

“Did you guys like the movie?” he asked, “What did you think of the part where they revealed Palpatine was merely a puppet controlled by Obi-wan Kenobi?”

“It was great,” said Kristoff at the same time as Anna said, “Palpatine was in this movie?” They stared at him blankly until he started laughing.

“Oh, the looks on your faces! Speaking of which, Kristoff, you’ve got a little something…” He gestured vaguely at his face. Kristoff wiped away a smear of lip gloss as Anna giggled.

“Where’s Elsa?” she asked, “I thought you were together?”

“She’s at Carvel. I’m afraid we had a bit of a blowout. I’m not exactly her favorite person. I’d better take a raincheck on that ice cream; I don’t think she wants to see me right now.”

“Oh no! I’d better go make sure she’s all right. I’m sorry about the ice cream, Hans. Next time!” She raced out of the theater, Kristoff trailing behind her. Hans watched through the window as they comforted Elsa. Although he remained in the cinema, his mind drifted back to the earlier argument. Christ, he really had behaved like an ass. By the time the trio had finished their ice cream, he realized he had been standing there too long. He made his way towards the door.

“Excuse me, sir!” He turned. One of the cinema employees was approaching him, waving something in her hand.

“Your girlfriend left these in the rest room.”

“She’s not my…” But Hans shut his mouth when he saw the medicine bottle he had been handed. As he read the name of the drug, several things dropped into place. He thought he understood now why she seemed so anxious all the time, why she rarely went out, why she didn’t answer her sister’s calls.

-

They met the next day on neutral ground, in the movie theater parking lot. The weather was cool and gray after the rain the night before. Elsa was already there when Hans pulled in, standing next to her car. There was still something stiff and formal about her appearance, but today it was softened by the voluminous braid over her shoulder. She looked as if she hadn’t slept.

“Give it to me,” she said as soon as he stepped out of the car. He produced the bottle from his pocket and handed it over. She snatched it from his grasp as if she were afraid he was going to pull it away at any moment.

“What do you want? Money? I can’t give you much, Anna will be suspicious if I withdraw from our trust account. Academic help? I can’t write your papers; they’ll know my writing style. But I can proofread and do your literature review. Or is it pull you want? I can speak to the dean, get the probation taken off your transcript. I’ll say I made it all up. Or I can talk to the board of my father’s company, I’m sure they’ll have a job offer for you. I’ll do anything you want, so long as you don’t tell anybody. Well, almost anything.” She wrapped her arms around her chest, protecting herself from some imagined fate. Hans was baffled.

“What? I don’t want any of that.”

“So you’re just going to tell everybody? My boss, the dean, my advisor? You won’t even give me a chance to buy your silence?”

“No, I’m not going to tell anybody,” he insisted. Did she seriously think he was about to blackmail her?

“Right, because I’m willing to cooperate. But you have to tell me what it is you want.” Her eyes were pleading, and she fidgeted anxiously with her hands.

“Elsa, I promise I’m not trying to blackmail you.”

“You’re not?” Her fidgeting stopped abruptly.

“No! God, no. What made you think that?”

“Your text. It was a bit cryptic.” She seemed more relaxed now, almost bordering on exhausted.

“I wasn’t sure if Anna knew, so I didn’t want to be specific.” In all the times they had discussed her sister, Anna had never mentioned Elsa’s illness. Considering how much she talked about her, Hans found it unlikely that it just never came up.

“I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions. I know it sounds paranoid, but I just couldn’t stop thinking about the rumors last time. I couldn’t go through that again. And I was so certain that you hated me enough, especially after yesterday.”

“I don’t hate you. I never hated you” Hans leaned against his car, waiting for her answer. After a few moments, she leaned next to him.

“You were right yesterday,” she said, “I’ve never done Anna any good. I couldn’t even protect her from you. You know, when you started dating, I saw the red flags. I thought, ‘What’s this grad student doing with a freshman?’ But I ignored it. I thought that you might be a more stable presence in her life. I thought that even if there was something up with you, it couldn’t be worse than me.”

“Look how that turned out,” said Hans wryly. They stood silently for what could have been a split second or an eternity.

“Anna doesn’t know,” said Elsa suddenly.

“Hm?”

“You said you weren’t sure if she knew. She doesn’t.”

“Don’t you think you should tell her?”

“I don’t know how. That night in the ER, I was so scared. I thought I was going to lose her. And I realized something had to change. If something happened, I couldn’t live with myself knowing that I had spent my whole life pushing her away. She’s all I have, and I love her dearly. It’s been hard this past year. I’ve been trying to let her in, but I don’t know how to do it without hurting her. And I don’t know if she can ever forgive me for what’s already happened. I wasn’t there when she needed me most.”

“I think we can agree,” said Hans, “that I have turned out to cause Anna far more harm than you have. But you’ve seen how readily she has forgiven me. If she can do that, I’m sure you won’t have any trouble. After all, she loves you.”

“I hope you’re right.” Hans reached out tentatively and patted her shoulder. She stiffened momentarily, but then she relaxed into the touch.

“Anyway,” he said, “you are not an asshole like me.” Elsa seemed surprised to find herself laughing, and Hans found himself joining in.

When she had pulled away from the car, Elsa said, “You know this doesn’t make us friends.”

“I would never dare to suggest such a thing. All I ask is this: truce?”

“Truce,” she replied decisively.

“Well,” he said, straightening up, “in honor of our newly-signed armistice agreement, I propose we go see a movie.”

“All right,” she agreed, “but only if we get ice cream afterwards.”

-

“Well, Elsa, what did you think? Did it make a case for the redemptive power of love?”

“I will concede that love is powerful enough to motivate change for the better. But change isn’t instantaneous. Redemption is a long process. You have to work for it, and it has to be earned time and time again. Death is just a lazy shorthand, and it’s bad writing.”

“You want to talk bad writing, what about my man General Hux? The guy just switched sides in the third act with no warning. The foreshadowing was nonexistent because they were too intent on fooling the audience. It was just a plot twist for the sake of a plot twist, more for shock value than because it added anything to the story. That’s bad writing.”

“I don’t know, I kind of liked him.”

“Either you’re saying that to be contrary or you just have a thing for redheads.”

“I am not being contrary!”

“So you like redheads, then?”

“I don’t!”

“You answered too quickly.”

“I didn’t!”

“Yes, you did.”

“Look, are we getting ice cream or not?”

***

Author’s Note: Modern AU is something I thought I would never write. But I did say I was apologizing today. Unfortunately, this did not turn out as light and fluffy as I had hoped. Some apology, huh? At least you got some Star Wars references out of it. Thank you all so much for reading! <3

#helsa #helsasummerevent #helsasummerevent2020 #frozen #hans #elsa #mentions of hanna #mentions of kristanna #star wars references #modern au #fanfic

[msiconoclast]

Again - Chapter 1

Pairing: Jaebeom x Reader

Genre: romance, angst

Word Count: 2.3k

Summary:  Lim Jaebeom was the single most significant part of your college experience.  A chance encounter brings you together again many years later when you’ve both settled into your careers (Jaebeom is a music producer and Y/N is a journalist).  As you take a walk down memory lane, you reflect on your understanding of love and its many trials.  Some loves are meant to make you grow, and some are meant to help you heal.   And some are destined to be both.

A/N: Whew, this took longer than I expected.  Enjoy!  Read the prologue first if you haven’t yet: Again - Prologue

-----------------------------------------------------

Lim Jaebeom first showed up in your life the summer after sophomore year.  You were nineteen at the time and life was still full of glorious possibilities. 

Before you learned his name, he had been "hoodie guy from film class". 

Hoodie guy almost always showed up to class late, often with dark circles under his eyes that looked like they'd been there for days.  His usual attire of oversized hoodie, shorts, and sandals suggested that he'd probably just rolled out of bed and come straight to class.  He would inevitably fall asleep in the back row and start snoring at some point during lecture.  You had to physically move to the front just to block out the noise and catch what the prof was saying.

Yet somehow, he managed to be the professor's favorite student.  

The thing is, when he wasn't nodding off, hoodie guy was apparently Ebert incarnate.  He was usually quiet but whenever the class discussion came to a halt, he would always make a comment that somehow managed to cut straight to the heart of the film.  The class would give collective pause over his flash of brilliance and then resume in excited debate in a new enlightened direction.  On the few occasions when the professor decided to read out excerpts from written assignments, you knew.....you just knew that they were always from hoodie guy's papers by the smirk on his face.

In other words....the guy was annoying as hell.

Look, you loved movies and film class was sacred.  It was one of the few classes you actually enjoyed outside of your major.  How dare this guy just waltz into class in his pajamas and proceed to wax philosophical on “French New Wave” while the rest of you barely understood what the films were trying to convey?  Was he some kind of silver screen idiot savant?  More importantly, why was he trying to ruin the curve for everyone?!

Needless to say, by the time the semester ended, you were more than done with hoodie guy’s antics.  If you were to never see him again, that would be absolutely perfect.

Life, unfortunately, had other plans for you.

As spring eased into summer, you decided to take a job at Joe's on Third to supplement your non-paid internship at the local paper.  Joe's was your home away from home as a student.  Cozy and airy, it had the perfect ambiance and was never too packed.  As a bonus, they served a mean grilled cheese among a small menu of comfort food classics and you would get fed every day you worked there.  It was going to be tough balancing the two jobs but all things considered, it wasn’t a bad deal at all.

When you showed up at seven for your first day at Joe's, the place was still empty.  The only sound came from behind the counter where someone was grinding coffee beans.  A tall figure with an enviable head of hair was rustling around getting the goods ready before the morning rush.  As you got closer, you noticed that he had more than a few piercings, one in particular under his right eye.  You never really found facial piercings to be attractive on men but there was something oddly intriguing about the look on him.  It gave him an air of nonchalance.  A rebel without a cause.

He was so concentrated on his tasks that he didn't notice you until you tapped on the counter in front of him.

"Shit....oh...."  It took him a moment to collect his thoughts until a look of recognition registered in his face.  "You’re Y/N?  I'm Jaebeom.  Call me JB.  Joe said I'm supposed to set you up on your first day."  

Hoodie Guy?

The second he opened his mouth, it dawned on you that this was no stranger.  Though you never cared to study his face, you had memorized hoodie guy's voice by heart.  And while this clean shaven, well dressed man in front of you looked nothing like the guy who always buried his face in his hoodies, the voice was unmistakable.    

"Intro to World Cinema.  Were you the one who got the only A in class??"

Confused, he raised his eyebrows and tried again.  "Uh, I'm supposed to get you trained on your first day and make sure you can..."

"I'm asking if you were in Intro to World Cinema last semester?  Didn't you always wear a hoodie to class and nap in the back row?  Were you the jerk who ruined the curve for everyone and got the only A on the final paper?

He stared at you as if you were nuts.  But you didn't really expect him to protest innocence.

"I was in that class too and would've gotten an A if it weren't for you!  Instead I got a B+.  First B+ in two years of school!!"  The words flew out of your mouth before you could catch yourself.  Oh, you knew it was petty but your indignation had been brewing for weeks.

He squinted his eyes and continued to stare at you.

Ding! 

Somewhere in the back, a toaster went off.  This seemed to snap him out of his trance and you watched as confusion dissolved into amusement on his face. 

He cleared his throat: "Well...Miss B+....we got twenty minutes until open.  If you want to keep this job, I suggest you get going and put all the baked goods out." 

Not waiting for you to respond, he turned towards the kitchen. 

Just before disappearing into the back, he suddenly swung around and grinned`: "Yeah, I got the A.  And you were the girl with the pencil hair bun who always sat in the front."

So he did recognize you.

Asshole.

The first week of your new job breezed by without much of a hitch.  You'd worked restaurant jobs before and a cafe was a piece of cake by comparison.  What surprised you was how efficient JB was at the job.  You just couldn't stitch together the image of him snoring in class with how professional he appeared at the cafe.  Not only was he efficient, he also seemed to be preternaturally friendly towards everyone who walked in.  Loud teenagers, moms with screaming babies, post-breakup girls drowning in their brownie-a-la-mode, he handled each and every one of them with calm and kindness.  Yet, you wouldn't exactly call him a "people person" since he never voluntarily took up small talk with anyone nor did he socialize much with the other staff.  It seemed that JB simply existed comfortably in the backdrop of the cafe’s inviting atmosphere and treated everyone with the same distant warmth.  

After the awkward initial encounter with JB, you maintained a precarious distance towards each other.  You were still reeling from the embarrassment of your outburst, and he must have decided to steer clear of stirring up the "crazy" in you again.  In fact, he treated you just like any other member of the staff, as if the incident never happened.  If anything, you two developed a satisfying partnership of sorts.  When the cafe was busy, you teamed up to keep the orders moving and the kitchen hot.  When there was a lull, you gave each other plenty of space.  You would work on your articles for the paper while he pranced around behind the counter scribbling down notes on little pieces of paper.

Mid-afternoons were usually the slowest at the cafe.  You savored these moments when time seemed to pass by as slowly as dust particles that swayed in the summer sun.  It gave you a strange sense of privacy even if you were sitting in a cafe full of people.   Sometimes, when you were feeling really wild, you'd stealthily switch the cafe jazz that droned on in the background to your favorite soundtracks.  None of the cafe patrons seemed to mind as long as it was something mellow.  The one person who did take note though was JB.  

"Is that 'Before Sunrise'?"   Um hum.

"That sounds like 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind'?"  Yup.

"Oh, 'Midnight in Paris'.  The gypsy jazz is cool."   Totally...

Either this guy had seen every movie under the sun or you two just happened to have very similar tastes.  What was most curious was the fact that these were all movies that any other guy would scoff as “chick flicks”.   Not the type of entertainment that you’d expect a “rebel without a cause“ to seek out.

"So did you actually watch all of these movies?"  You had to ask him one afternoon.

"Hmm......yeah."  He waved one of the little pieces of paper he was scribbling on: "They help me with my songwriting.  I......heh, need inspiration and I like movies that provide different perspectives on the concept of love. "

So that's what he had been working on.  Song lyrics.  You weren’t entirely surprised since half of the population in LA were trying to make it in Entertainment in one way or another.

"Why do people write so many love songs anyways?  Loneliness is totally underrated."

"Because almost any emotion that music can express can be related to love.  It's universal." he said

"Yeah?  And what have you learned about love in all your movie-watching and song-writing experience?”

"The heart's not like a box that gets filled up. It expands in size the more you love."

“Her”.  Nice..... another sentimental fool.

The best thing about working at Joe's was the weekly closing party.  Every Friday night, the staff would string up lights around the back patio and put on a little dance party while closing the cafe down.  It was an unspoken rule that whatever bottles of wine were open by the end of the week was a free for all for the party and the beer taps were open until dry.  Quite a nice little perk for the employees. 

You had always enjoyed yourself at these parties.  Most of the part time staff were kids who went to the same school, people you had seen around campus.  It was where the staff really got to know each other and sometimes, got their hands on each other.  And it didn't take long for everyone to get comfortable and really let loose.  It was also funny to see how people changed when they were drunk.  The shy introverted ones would surprisingly become super hyper while the normally outgoing ones often ended up bawling their eyes out in the corner by the end of the night.  Nothing short of human theater.

The first couple of times you'd joined, you were still careful not to drink too much.  You wanted to make a good impression and actually get to know everyone.  But by the fourth closing party, you were well on your way to earning the title of dancing queen.  See, alcohol also had an intriguing effect on you.  It helped you break out of your usually calm shell but it also had a tendency to make you more than a little flirty.  And on this particular night, you were definitely feeling the love. 

The theme for the night was 90s jams and you had been showing off your moves on top of one of the patio tables for the last 45 minutes.  But it was nearing midnight now and most people were either too drunk or too tired to be dancing and you were starting to feel the early signs of a crash yourself.  It was then the bass thumping hip hop switched over to a slow and smooth R&B song that you had never heard before.  There was something seductive about the way the singer cooed out the words.

"Girl it's only you

Have it your way

And if you want you can decide

And if you'll have me

I can provide everything that you desire

Said if you get a feeling

Feeling that I am feeling

Won't you come closer to me baby,

You've already got me right where you want me baby

I just want to be your man

How does it feel

How does it feel

Said I want to know how does it feel

How does it feel

How does it feel"

As you spun around on the table, you noticed a pair of gaze that fixed steadily on you as you swayed your hips slowly to the beat.  You couldn't make out the expression on his face but there was an intensity in his gaze that made your body heat up.  The thought that you had a captured audience turned you on and prompted you to run your hands across your body.  As you felt your body heat up more and more, you reached for the glass nearby and took out an ice cube.  You desperately needed to cool down.  Holding the ice cube in your mouth for a second, you then started to run it against your skin.  Trails of ice water trickled down your neck, your collarbone and pooled where your cleavage had shown through your shirt.  The song was pushing towards a crescendo and the singer's falsetto was ringing in your head.  It grew louder and louder until the lights started to spin. 

Dizziness took over.  Suddenly, you felt yourself lose your balance and stumble towards the ground.

Black.

And the next time you opened your eyes, a familiar face was just inches above you.  The owner of the gaze had his arms propped up beneath you while they supported your weight.

You could feel his breath on your face and for what seemed like an eternity, you simply stared at each other.

Finally, you ended the silence by flashing him the brightest smile you could muster and pointing at his nose: "I forgive you!!!...Hoodie guy!"

The corners of his mouth curved up. 

"You're pretty cute, B+."  He chuckled.

Previous      Next

#got7 #got7 jaebum #jaebeom #jaebum #got7 fanfic #kpop writing #got7 fiction #got7 fic #got7 imagines #got7 jaebeom #got7 jb

[purplesurveys]

777

do you think weird it's for someone to have never tried soda? I’d be surprised that they were never curious enough to try it if they can access soda, but then again I live in a third world country and not everyone gets to try everything. I’ve learned to judge less when it comes to opportunities like this. is there any foreign film you recommend? Portrait of a Lady on Fire was fucking intense and so, so so good. do you have the same religious beliefs as your parents? My dad might also be atheist, but I’ve never known for sure. He once confided in me that he was atheist in college but “it changed” when he met my mom... but honestly we’ve always grunted the same way whenever my mom tells us it’s time to pray or if we have to watch our weekly mass livestream. So idk. I think he just acts Catholic to appease her, but yeah he’s definitely weird about it. which floor of your house/building are you on now? Second floor. It’s my first time to want to hang out in my bedroom in months because IT’S ACTUALLY RAINING and it’s cold enough in my room to wanna stay here. are there any maps hanging in your room? No maps here.

are you often a third wheel? or is someone a third wheel to you? Yep I third wheel pretty often. My girlfriend and I study in different schools and I have friends in my school who are couples, so if Gab isn’t visiting my campus for the day I just tag along with my couple friends. I don’t get bothered or feel insecure by it because I have my own relationship lolol what's the last dvd you bought? Holy shit...DVD? I don’t even remember anymore. It was most likely an Audrey Hepburn film, back in 2013 when I was really into her. That or Beyoncé’s Life Is But A Dream documentary, which was the last thing she ever released on DVD. Also came out in 2013. tell me about your favorite pair of jeans. High-waisted 90s-styled jeans. Nothing much to say other than they fit me well, I got a lot of compliments whenever I have them on, and they match any t-shirt I paired with, which made me like wearing t-shirts again haha. would you ride a motorcycle if given the chance? (or have you?) I would but only if someone super experienced was driving. I haven’t been on one because my parents don’t allow me to, and tbh I don’t mind the rule because I’m mostly scared of motorcycles anyway. is your hair healthy? No. Some hair salon I went to around ten years ago put some cheap products in my hair when I had it rebonded and it never felt 100% healthy again. Until today it gets very stiff when it gets into contact with water and only shampoo, and I always have to pair it with conditioner. if a hotel offered free breakfast in bed, what would you order? Eggs Benedict and some very creamy warm coffee. how often do you take a train? Never. I don’t trust the public transport here and I’m better off driving in my own car. what are your thoughts on reincarnation? (have you ever read up about it?) I don’t think of it at all because I don’t believe in it. I don’t mind others who are into it, just don’t shove it down my throat.  what's your favorite led zeppelin song? I don’t have one. does your home have a balcony/deck/porch? Yeah we have a balcony. We used to have a full balcony, but we transformed 3/4 of it into my brother’s current room a few years ago because he was starting to grow up and he needed his own room. We retained 1/4 of the space so that it can be the place where my dog can still do his business. what does your closet/wardrobe say about you? It says I am a very messy person who can’t keep her closet consistently organized lol. It will also tell you I’m quite girly based on the clothes I own. do you enjoy theatre? I was never a fan. how would you feel about traveling abroad alone? If I was offered the chance to do it I certainly wouldn’t give it up, but I really, really, preferably would travel with at least one companion. Traveling is one of those experiences I’d want to share with someone, and I would hate if I had to go back to my hotel room at the end of the day with no one to talk to. who would you call a lyrical genius? Laura Jane Grace. how do you treat yourself? My go-to gift for myself is giving into my cravings hahaha. Nothing speaks more to me than food, and if I feel like I deserve a reward for a job well done, I’ll go to a slightly more expensive restaurant to celebrate. do you have an interesting passport? Idk, it’s a normal one and I never had it customized or anything. are you going to pursue a career according to what you enjoy? I hope I get to. I really enjoyed my PR internship and I’d love to be headed there. what happens to your old clothes? They go to the very back or the very bottom of my wardrobe for the most part. My mom will make us throw out clothes we don’t like anymore once a year, so that’s the time I get to get rid of them. what's your favorite frozen treat? Cornetto ice cream is one of my faaaaavorite comfort snacks. The end of the cone where they save chocolate chunks is the best part. who supports you financially? My parents. Getting increasingly guiltier about it by the day, too. if you wanted to go to the movie cinema, how would you get there? I would wait for the clock to strike midnight tonight, because in 48 minutes they’ll finally loosen lockdown rules AND I CAN FINALLY GO OUT. Hahaha. After that I’ll jump to my car, drive out of the village, take a u-turn, and I’m there. how many pillows are on your bed? Two big ones. would you pay more for organic food? Only if I had the money for it. Organic food is a thing of the (very) privileged here and is not very accessible to begin with, unless you’re in posher grocieries. have you ever had a crush on a sibling's friend or a friend's sibling? I haven’t. I’d find it weird considering they’re all a bit younger than me. do you have a friend who mooches? what to do about it? (or is it you?) She’s never done it with me but I’ve heard enough horror stories about her to know that she tends to do this, but yeah Mils is apparently quite the moocher. I’m soooo not one; I’d wait for my friends to offer to pay for stuff, but otherwise I’m fighting them over the bill lmao. do you know much about feng shui? (do you use it?) I’m not knowledgeable on it but I’m definitely familiar with it, because we have a rather large Filipino-Chinese community/culture in the country that glorifies feng shui during Chinese New Year season. I don’t really have a choice but have Chinese culture shoved down my throat whether it’s in the news, the media, or my Chinese friends.  how would you make friends in a quiet class? I preferably wouldn’t because I’m only interested in getting good grades and getting that class over with hahaha. But if I was interested in making a friend or two, I’d typically scan the classroom and see who seems to be responsible? Like if they take notes as hard as I do. are you generally a quick learner? No. I take some time, and I especially take long if the thing being taught is more hands-on, like origami. I’ve just never been good at following certain tasks, and I prefer learning from reading instructions. what's your favorite spot to read? Skywalk or the dining table. has anyone given you a nickname you didn't like? (what was it?) Not that I can recall. I’m okay with all of them. did you know that buddha is not considered a god to buddhists? Yes. do you save tickets from movies, etc.? If it’s a significant enough date or event, sure. I’ve kept my 2018 Paramore gig ticket to this day, but like I’ve thrown out my ticket for Knives Out because I hated the movie lol. without looking him up, who was jim morrison? Vocalist for The Doors. when's the last time your bedroom was painted/wallpapered? Idk, 2006 or 2007 when the house was being made? It’s never been repainted. teach me something in another language. (not french/chinese/german/arabic) Why so language-ist lmaooooooo uh “Nakauwi ka na?” means “Did you get home? / Have you gotten home?” what type of body wash did you last use? Idk, I never read the labels on it actually. what type of music do you like and why? Right now I’m into lo-fi because it makes me feel relaxed, but I’m also starting to get into the recent trend where today’s artists put out songs that sound like they’re from the 80s, like Dua Lipa’s Physical or The Weeknd’s Blinding Lights - I think the genre is called synth pop/synthwave. They simply sound cool haha and they’re awesome to listen to while driving. if you randomly want to eat something in the house, do you eat it or wait? I check the time, like if we’re supposed to be having dinner soon, then act accordingly. who knows the most about you (besides yourself)? My girlfriend. do you have a nervous habit? (e.g. biting nails, tapping feet, smoking) Plucking eyebrow or eyelash hair, but that behavior is reserved for extreme cases where I’m incredibly and inconsolably anxious. On a milder day I would vape, sigh a lot, or bite my nails. how's your favorite pro sports team doing lately? I don’t watch sports with teams. would you be/are you a good role model to a younger sibling? I don’t get into trouble but I’m not the best influence either.

#survey #surveys

[randomnameless]

21 questions meme! wait i didn’t count 21 questions?

Tagged by @deetvar!

Nickname : Annie

Real Name : something really easy to pronounce but people still get it wrong and it baffles me

Zodiac : Sagittarius

Favorite Musicians/Band : Uh... I’ve never been able to answer because i don’t listen to a group or a band, rather things I hear are kind of catchy and I like one or two songs. Lately I’ve been listening to Paper Mario TTYD’s OST, it feels really nostalgic.

Favorite Sport Team : World Cup’s Germany in 2014. I loved every match, especially a certain semi-final

Other blogs : I don’t have any? The Imgur account where I uploaded FE5′s 4-koma doesn’t count, does it?

Do I get ask : yes, and I’m always late as fuck to answer them.

How Many blogs I follow : 137, but more than half of them aren’t posting anything anymore

Tumblr crush : what does that mean?

Lucky Number : 17

What I am wearing : an old pair of jeans and a shirt - if i could i would stay in PJs all day long, but then I wouldn’t do anything productive so...

Dream vacation : Well, I’ve seen the Hermione while it was being docked in Rochefort a few years ago, and I thought the idea of crossing the Atlantic in a 17th century ship, using the wind to sail but with modern commodities (WC etc) kind of attractive.

Dream Car  well i’m looking for one right now, so dream car would be affordable, comfortable to drive in and with manual transmission. And it wouldn’t pollute too much. Well, is it a dream car of the car i want to drive in my dreams if i were a billionnaire??

Favourite food hmm... I would say I like everything, but it’d be a lie, I tried a Welsh a few weeks ago and I can’t understand how someone might eat this if it’s not a post-hangover situation. I can’t pinpoint a favourite dish, but I’ve eaten in a Laosian restaurant last year and it was really good. It was a sort of fish broth in coconut milk, with some spices i couldn’t recognise and a lot of noodles! I’ve never tried anything like that before, so it was a nice surprise.

Drink of choice : Coconut Water? Too bad it becomes more and more expensive by the years...

Instruments : recorder, like every french student who’s older than 11 and man did i suck at it. But one day while i was waiting for the train I’ve heard a guy playing Midna’s lament on a free piano left at disposal in the train station, and I thought it would have been nice to know how to play something.

Languages : French, English, and sometimes I can broadly undestand fanfics written in spanish. Bar that? Nope.

Celebrity crush : ? Does it count if I say I love Ryotaro Okiayu as a voice actor, or Travis Willingham in the same role?

Random facts : I thought I loved the internship I had in a random court two years ago, but I came to realise that it wasn’t that interesting, and what I really loved were my fellow randoms who were with me. We weren’t coworkers per se, but it was really cool and I liked it. Then the internship ended, and I entered into a firm where everyone was really nice, but it wasn’t the same. Then everyone was more or less fired because their personalities clashed with my boss’ and I was kind of alone doing a crapton of things for around 5-6 months.

I won’t say I hated it, but damn if going to “hey coworker #2 what have you watched yesterday on TV?” to nearly complete solitude because you don’t feel confident enough to ask your boss what he watched yesterday on TV was hard. And now the firm hired someone, and a new trainee, and it’s back to step 1 “learning to socialise again omg”

A good friend of mine recently started to send me useless trivia about Byzantine Emperors during his spare time, and I don’t know if it is a sign that his work sucks or if he tries to be invited to cinema - well, that was before Covid 19 :)

Tagging whoever wants to do it!

#meme replies #call it french bias but northern european food sucks #it doesn't look good #it looks sad #i've seen a post once saying that cheese was just a loaf of hardened milk and i nearly died #you can't reason with people who think like that #it's better to give up #ryotaro okiayu made me watch a LP of Tales of Destiny #in moonrunes #seriously #paper mario ttyd was a gem #and to think it was made by IS! #real life sucks #well it's not like i don't like my job but sometimes i wonder why didn't i pick something else #working from 9 to 17 being in an office and doing office work #tfw your junior doesn't listen to you because you're younger than her #eff it

[queenkazma]

I just saw a Youtube comment of a highschool student worried about his future life choices after highschool and it reminded me of how unsure and vulnerable (and perhaps a little angry and violent) i also was back then when it came to thinking about my future and the kind of studies i had to choose.

I’m convinced (like probably everybody) that i was the more lost and unsure about my future in the world. Like i wanted to do everything and nothing at the same time and i had like zero clear idea. I was terrified about the idea of wasting my time, do the wrong thing and then regret it later but i didn’t know what was the right thing to do and it gave me so much anxiety i cried all the time and just the words “choice” or “choose” made me actually sick.

i did have a preference for artistic fields but 1) art is a veery big field and i didn’t know what to do in art exactly, 2) i internalised this preference because “art is not a real job! it’s gonna be very hard! you’ll struggle to live decently” and i never had a strong personnality and never been determined like the people you see in movies or shonen manga willing to do anything to reach their goal! And i kinda wrongly believed that if i wasn’t as on fire as them about what i loved and didn’t want it as demonstratively as them and was hesitating then it  probably meant i didn’t want it that much right? it was probably not worth the time and money right? So it went more like “oh ok i’m not gonna do that then..” sooo i didn’t know what to do after graduation and i thought i was gonna end up being a hikikomori

But i’m 24 now and although I’m still fucking unsure about my future i’ve gone a long way and i learned many things and seeing that guy’s comment on youtube made me think of a couple of things i wish i knew back then:

 Advice NUMER ONE: life really starts when you realise (but like really deep realisation from the bottom of your heart) that you have to take YOUR time to find your place in the world and achieve your stuff. You might think “that’s not a new advice, i hear that all the time” yeah shut up because it’s a thing to know it and another one to KNOW IT. It’s like when you’re kid and you hear adults say “life is hard” all the time but one day the realisation hits you and you cry because you finally fucking realised.

No matter how much cooler other people's paths and projects sound compared to yours and how fast they evolve while you're here like "i still don't know what to do with my life, i'm probably gonna stay at this level forever while others are building companies and graduating med school" actually you are slowly maturing without realising it and the options are setting themselves in order of priorities in your subcouscious (cause your subconscious brain is smarter than you).

If it takes more years for you than for others to get the degree you want or if you stop everything and take a year to try out something completely different, you're actually not wasting your time at all, you learn skills and meet people you probably would never have known in another context. It's all part of a bigger scheme to achieve YOUR thing even when you don't know what it is yet.

Everything becomes much clearer when you genuinely don't give a shit about others' life anymore.

Advice 2: After highschool (and anytime in life in general) go for the obvious choice that sound like a good compromise and bring peace to your brain. Not the "cool" one or the one that sounds professional enough for your parents. You know why? Because it’s not gonna impact your life as much as you think, it’s just a fucking starting point, because one has to start somewhere. If you’re like most people you’re gonna change your mind and do something else in a year (or the next) anyways so why worry about a fucking starting point. To decide if a choice is good, divide it into 10 criterions positive and negative. If it has 6/10 advantages, even if it's still has 40% of inconvenient it's a good choice. if it has 8/10 it's an excellent choice. don't wait for something that'll entirely satisfy you with a 10/10 or you'll never dare to do anything. And know that "it looks super boring", “it’s gonna be so much fun” or "it's gonna give me a depression if i fail" are completely valid criterions. . Back then i was very anxious like "what if i make the wrong life choices", lmao what a fool! i thought when you chose a path it closed the access to other paths and you could never come back (especially when it comes to long or expensive studies) and like the range of choices just got narrower as you go. yeah that's a fucking lie. Actually in each new "room" you reach there are accesses to other previous doors in addition to new oddly specific ones. And sometimes you're like at room 5 in your life progression and you see an open door to a life choice from room 1 and you're like "oh look there it is again! and much easier to reach this time! i had no idea this job/studies/ internship/ person i met could lead me to work in that thing for which i would have had to take expensive classes 4years ago! interesting!” Also if you have an opportunity to go to a certain path several times throughout your personnal evolution, it's probably your subconscious telling you that it actually really wants to do that. Like it might be your dream job but you need time to realise. It’s gonna be a very weird comparison but you know how sometimes you glance at a text without even reading it but your eyes automatically spot all the dirty words? well your brain is gonna do the same with the things you unconsciously want. You’re gonna spot the open doors that lead to them. But if you need several years to be convinced then so be it. (take YOUR time remember).

Once you more or less know what you wanna do, don't think of what paths you could take to reach it, get in contact with the thing you want to do as soon as possible. random example: if you wanna work in the movie industry, don't think "i could go to that cinema school for x years and then do an internship there and there, that will then allow me to go.." nope! Be like young Spielberg and already start stalking people on the film set like "wow what are you doing? can i watch? do you have a job for me? what do i have to do to be you please?". honestly the worse that could happen is that they'll kick you out after giving you some quality advice and maybe even names of people to contact.

And last advice, get the fuck out of here and try to travel abroad. I'm 100% convinced that one year of studying or working abroad helps you more with becoming an adult and taking life decisions than 4 years of studying and seeing carrier advisers. Seriously, everything is clearer after one year abroad. Seeing other places helps you take some distance from whatever you're doing to see everything in a different light and get unexpected opportunities. Like honestly if i were president or something i would force all the students to take one compulsary year abroad after highschool to open their mind and come back more mature and chill before they start studying anything.

#what am i doing with my life #anxiety #highschool #university #college #life advice #don't know what to do #reblog to save a life #chill #travel #job #life choices #choosing your path #advice from a 24yo #i hope it's gonna help

[peachscissors]

Auteur Study of Spike Lee

  According to the New York Times, prolific director Spike Lee helped “[usher] in ... the American independent film movement of the 1980s.”[1] Lee is a tenured professor at his alma mater, NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, where since 2002 he has served as artistic director of the Graduate Film Program.[2] He also owns the production company 40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks, through which he produces most of his films. Throughout his career, Spike Lee has been a strong advocate for social change. Lee uses his voice as an auteur to draw attention to social issues and to highlight the beauty and resilience of Black American communities.

  Lee’s has faced funding issues since he began making movies, and has often produced his films independently or through alternative funding routes. His breakout feature She’s Gotta Have It (1986) was funded through various grants from state-run and non-profit organizations, “a cast working for deferred payments,”[3] and a crew made up largely of Lee’s family, friends and former classmates.[4] The film premiered at the Directors Fortnight, where Lee won a prize for young directors.[5] The majority of Lee’s filmography has made the rounds in the festival circuit before receiving a wide release, including five films which showed at Cannes,[6] where he is now the first Black Jury President.[7] He is also a strong supporter of the lesser-known American Black Film Festival.[8]

  Off the back of his early Cannes success, Lee received studio deals for his next few films, but was often unsatisfied with the budgets, editorial limitations and lack of marketing afforded to his films. In his pre-production journal for Do the Right Thing (1989), Lee ponders which studio to go with after Paramount backed out, writing “Touchstone, Orion, Universal? In a way all these motherf***ers are the same."[9] From the mid-nineties on, Lee alternated “between increasingly rare studio financing and esoteric indies, adapting as the landscape of both kept shifting under his feet.”[10] Lee has funded the majority of his films through private investments, outsider studios and distributors such as Netflix, Amazon and Blumhouse,[11] or even through Kickstarter.[12] Despite his indie sensibility and frequent festival appearances, Lee’s adaptability serves him well in straddling the line between art and commercial cinema. Although most of his feature films have been independent, he has a long history of directing commercials[13] as well as music videos for the likes of Public Enemy, Michael Jackson, Anita Baker and Prince.[14] When given a major studio budget for a feature film, Lee also clearly excels, as we can see by the popularity and financial success of his heist film Inside Man (2006), a 45 million dollar co-production between 40 Acres and a Mule, Universal and Ron Howard’s Imagine Entertainment.[15]

  Spike Lee’s voice as an auteur is clear, having written, directed and produced the majority of his films.[16] In much of his earlier work he has also served as editor and actor.[17] He has maintained long-term collaborations with cinematographers Ernest K. Dickerson and Malik Hassan Sayeed,[18] editors Barry Alexander Brown and Sam Pollard,[19] and composer Terrence Blanchard.[20] Lee also frequently employs a line-up of actors including, most notably, Giancarlo Esposito, Samuel L. Jackson, Delroy Lindo and John Turturro,[21] who’s highly successful screen acting careers were arguably catalyzed by their appearances in his early films. Lee uses his significant platform as an established producer and educator to elevate the voices of the next generation of Black filmmakers, often taking them under his wing as a mentor, offering them internships and production deals.[22]

  Almost all of Lee’s films contain themes of race and gender, and deal with social issues faced by Black American communities. His passion for these issues and his authenticity in depicting these communities feeds into Spike Lee’s cinematic self-expression, having grown up in Brooklyn where many of his films are set and shot,[23] and having attended the historically Black Morehouse College in Atlanta.[24] His first foray into filmmaking came in the summer of 1977, which saw a city-wide blackout in New York caused by a record-setting heatwave and an ensuing mass plunder of the city’s audio equipment stores.[25] Lee, having borrowed his friend’s Super 8 camera while home for the summer, decided to document the night of looting and the subsequent block parties taking advantage of the newfound DJ equipment. Upon his return to Morehouse, Lee declared a major in Mass Communications, and was encouraged by his film professor to edit his footage together into a documentary. His work on the what would become his first student film, Last Hustle in Brooklyn (1977, title a play on Last Tango in Paris), sparked in him a passion for filmmaking. As he states it, “film found me.”[26]

  Most of Lee’s filmography draws heavy inspiration from his lived experiences and uses his filming locations almost as characters of their own. On filming in Brooklyn, Lee says “it’s my home, it developed who I am and what I’ve become,” and this love for the borough permeates many of his films, “the people, the diversity and culture [serving as] his inspiration.”[27] She’s Gotta Have It, for instance, often shifts its focus from the plot at hand to show different aspects of the Fort-Greene neighbourhood, beginning with a montage of still photographs shot by Spike’s brother David Lee, inserts of day-to-day life in the neighbourhood, and an abundance of establishing shots which serve to show off the livelihood of the community itself rather than to establish any particular narrative space.[28] According to film scholar Manthia Diawara, Lee “positions the spectator to feel a sense of belonging to the place,” that he “develops his metaphor of public-space-as-home throughout the film.”[29] Do the Right Thing paints a stylistically similar portrait of Bedford-Stuyvesant, another Brooklyn neighbourhood, through the use of an ensemble cast and on-location filming, and expands upon the themes surrounding rising tensions caused by New York’s intolerable heatwaves, a phenomenon which he experienced first-hand while filming Last Hustle in Brooklyn. But nowhere are the autobiographical aspects of Spike Lee’s filmic style more apparent than in School Daze (1988). The film takes place at Mission College, a fictional historically Black Atlanta institution, and follows a Black undergraduate student and activist in a plot which clearly draws from Lee’s experiences studying at Morehouse.[30]

  Beyond thematic links, Spike Lee also has many recognizable stylistic markers across his filmography. He often adds emphasis to certain key shots by repeating them from different angles, like when the trash can comes crashing through Sal’s window in Do the Right Thing,[31] or when Malcolm X is reunited with his old partner Shorty in Lee’s biopic.[32] He also has a penchant for fourth wall breaking techniques, most apparently in She’s Gotta Have It’s constant in-your-face direct camera addresses. His famous double dolly shots are another breaking of the fourth wall. First employed in Mo’ Better Blues (1990),[33] where, in Lee’s own words, it was “really just show-offy, student film stuff,” he reused the technique subsequently to create “a transportive, or sometimes alienated feeling.”[34] This feeling is conveyed to great effect in Malcolm X (1992) when the civil rights leader passes by the ballroom where he would soon after be martyred, as if in a trance,[35] as well as the last scene of BlacKkKlansman, when Ron and his girlfriend Patrice investigate noises outside their apartment only to discover a flaming cross surrounded by Klansmen a ways outside their window.[36]

  Lee’s most prominent stylistic signature is his frequent use of still photography and archival footage to bring a sense of actualité to both his narrative and documentary films. This can be seen in the aforementioned opening montage of She’s Gotta Have It and subsequent inserts, and in both the still insert of two boxers in the lead-up to the climactic uprising in Do the Right Thing and the photograph of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X shaking hands which concludes the film.[37] This practice was greatly expanded upon in Malcolm X, in which key moments throughout the film are punctuated by both real news footage and black and white insert shots of Denzel Washington’s Malcolm meant to evoke the look and feel of old newscasts.[38] Taking it even further still, the bulk of Spike Lee’s four-part documentary When the Levees Broke (2006) is made up of archival footage and photographs, with interviews and other footage only accounting for a small portion of the 255-minute runtime.[39]

  Lee continues to insert archival footage into most of his films to this day. His ending for BlacKkKlansman (2018) consisted of a montage of current news footage of acts of anti-Black violence, white supremacist gatherings, and speeches by the very much real and still relevant David Duke (the former Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard portrayed prominently in-story by Topher Grace) and President Donald Trump both showing support for white supremacist and neo-Nazi groups.[40] He also book-ended Da Five Bloods (2020) with a montage of Black anti-Vietnam-war protesters and a speech by Dr. King, and interspersed still photos and paintings of Black historical figures.[41] Even in his recent concert film of David Byrne’s American Utopia (2020), Lee takes the opportunity to have family members of fallen victims of police brutality hold up archival photographs of those they lost in a montage while Byrne performs a cover of Janelle Monae’s Hell You Talmbout, a protest song whose refrain prompts listeners to repeat the names of Black people who have been murdered by police officers.[42]

  Throughout his 35-year career, Spike Lee has made a wide variety of films, from commercials and music videos to independent art films to major studio thrillers. He has seen success in both festival contexts and at the box office. Much of his filmography draws inspiration from his personal experiences and surroundings. As a writer, director and producer Lee brings his views on social issues into his filmmaking, frequently adding a layer of actualité by incorporating archival footage and photography into his films. Lee is among the first of the few Black directors to have been accepted into the mainstream canon of art cinema. His critical and financial success has helped pave the way for subsequent generations of Black cineastes, and his early success set the stage for the American Independent film movement as a whole.

Works cited: [1] Paul Brenner, “She’s Gotta Have It (1986) Review Summary,” The New York Times, archived October 27, 2007, accessed October 31, 2020, https://web.archive.org/web/20071027102646/http://movies.nytimes.com/movie/44229/She-s-Gotta-Have-It/overview. [2] Nate Von Zumwalt, “A Portrait of the Artist as a Teacher: Spike Lee,” NYU | Tisch (New York University, November 19, 2019), https://tisch.nyu.edu/tisch-research-news-events/news/a-portrait-of-the-artist-as-a-teacher-spike-lee. [3] Vadim Rizov, “Joint Financing: Spike Lee Has Never Had an Easy Time Funding His Films,” MTV News (Viacom International Inc., July 26, 2013), http://www.mtv.com/news/2770944/spike-lee-film-funding/. [4] Stuart Mieher, “Spike Lee’s She’s Gotta Have It,” The New York Times Magazine, August 9, 1987, https://www.nytimes.com/1987/08/09/magazine/spike-lee-s-gotta-have-it.html. [5] Spike Lee, “She’s Gotta Have It,” Quinzaine des Réalisateurs (Société des réalisateurs de films, 1986), https://www.quinzaine-realisateurs.com/en/film/shes-gotta-have-it/. [6] “Spike Lee,” Festival de Cannes, 2020, https://www.festival-cannes.com/en/artist/spike-lee. [7] Yohana Desta, “Spike Lee for President…of the 2020 Cannes Film Jury,” Vanity Fair (Condé Nast, January 14, 2020), https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2020/01/spike-lee-cannes-jury-president. [8] Mike Fleming, Jr., “No Cannes Do: Why Spike Lee Nixed ‘Do The Right Thing’ Silver Anniversary For Black Fest Fete,” Deadline (Penske Business Media, LLC., May 13, 2014), https://deadline.com/2014/05/no-cannes-do-why-spike-lee-nixed-do-the-right-thing-silver-anni-for-black-fest-fete-729355/. [9] Spike Lee and Lisa Jones, Do the Right Thing : A Spike Lee Joint (New York, N.Y.: Fireside, 1989), 75. [10] Rizov, “Joint Financing.” [11] Da Five Bloods, directed by Spike Lee (Los Gatos, CA: Netflix, Inc., 2020), Netflix streaming; Chi-Raq, directed by Spike Lee (Culver City, CA: Amazon Studios, 2015), Amazon Prime Streaming; Pass Over, directed by Spike Lee (Culver City, CA: Amazon Studios, 2018), Amazon Prime Streaming; “BlacKkKlansman (2018) Company Credits,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7349662/companycredits. [12] Fleming, “No Cannes Do.” [13] “Spike Lee TV Commercials,” iSpot.tv (iSpot.tv, Inc., 2020), https://www.ispot.tv/topic/director/gK/spike-lee. [14] “Music Video’s,” 40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks, 2019, https://40acres.com/video/. [15] “Inside Man,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed November 1, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0454848/. [16] “The Jointography,” 40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks, 2019, https://40acres.com/the-jointography/. [17] “Spike Lee,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000490/. [18] “Ernest R. Dickerson,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0225416; “Malik Hassan Sayeed,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0768434/. [19] “Barry Alexander Brown,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0113084/; “Sam Pollard,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0689498/. [20] “Terence Blanchard,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005966/. [21] “Giancarlo Esposito,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0002064/; “Samuel L. Jackson,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000168/; “Delroy Lindo,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005148/; “John Turturro,” IMDb (IMDb.com, Inc.), accessed October 31, 2020, https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001806/. [22] Von Zumwalt, “Artist as a Teacher” [23] Robin Bennefield, “Spike Lee on Why Brooklyn Has a Starring Role in His Films,” Marriott Bonvoy Traveler (Marriott International, Inc., December 4, 2015), https://traveler.marriott.com/new-york-city/spike-lee-on-why-brooklyn-has-a-starring-role-in-his-films/. [24] “Shelton ‘Spike’ Lee Bio,” Morehouse College, archived May 6, 2012, https://web.archive.org/web/20120506002442/https://www.morehouse.edu/about/boardbios/slee.html. [25] Neil McCormick, “Murder, Blackouts and a Hip-Hop Revolution: The Summer That Inspired The Get Down,” The Telegraph, August 12, 2016, https://www.telegraph.co.uk/on-demand/0/murder-blackouts-and-a-hip-hop-revolution-the-summer-that-inspir/. [26] Mediabistro, “Spike Lee: My First Big Break,” YouTube Video, YouTube, September 27, 2012, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1KEEbQeC-w. [27] Bennefield, “Why Brooklyn Has a Starring Role.” [28] She’s Gotta Have It, directed by Spike Lee (Santa Monica, CA: Island Pictures, 1986), Netflix Streaming, 00:01:00 – 00:02:13. (Opening montage, other examples can be found throughout the film). [29] Manthia Diawara, In Search of Africa, 2nd ed. (1998; repr., Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2000), 263, https://books.google.ca/books?id=eyTbwaEDTsUC. [30] School Daze, directed by Spike Lee (Culver City, CA: Columbia Pictures, 1988), CTV Streaming. [31] Do the Right Thing, directed by Spike Lee, (1989; New York, NY: The Criterion Collection, 2019), Blu-ray, 01:38:50 – 01:38:57. [32] Malcolm X, directed by Spike Lee, (1992; Burbank, CA: Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc., 2012), Blu-ray, 01:31:45 – 01:31:50. [33] Mo’ Better Blues, directed by Spike Lee, (1990; New York, NY: Kino Lorber, 2020) Blu-ray, 01:18:45 – 01:19:38. [34] Glenn Kenny, “Doing the Right Thing,” DGA Quarterly, Spring 2008, https://www.dga.org/Craft/DGAQ/All-Articles/0801-Spring-2008/DGA-Interview-Spike-Lee.aspx. [35] Malcolm X, 02:59:06 – 02:59:22. [36] BlacKkKlansman, directed by Spike Lee, (Universal City, CA: Focus Features LLC, 2018), Netflix Streaming, 02:05:38 – 02:05:55. [37] Do the Right Thing, 01:32:37, 01:53:55. [38] Malcolm X, 00:00:00 – 00:02:35, 01:59:30 – 02:02:25, 02:25:50 – 02:26:40, 03:07:20 – 03:10:40 (real news footage); Ibid., 02:02:40 – 02:02:45, 02:26:45 – 02:27:25, 02:32:25 – 02:33:35, 02:34:27 – 02:34:32, 02:43:35 – 02:45:45, 03:06:50 – 03:10:40 (black and white inserts). [39] When the Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts, directed by Spike Lee (New York, NY: HBO, 2006), Crave Streaming. [40] BlacKkKlansman, 02:06:00 – 02:09:14. [41] Da Five Bloods, 00:00:05 – 00:02:50, 00:40:15 – 00:40:50 (anti-Vietnam protests); Ibid., 02:25:13 (MLK); Ibid., 0:19:02, 00:27:55 (stills). [42] David Byrne’s American Utopia, directed by Spike Lee, (New York, NY: HBO Films, 2020), Crave Streaming, 01:25:25 – 01:29:35.

[aion-rsa]

Bo Burnham: Inside Songs Ranked from Worst to Best

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The musical of the summer was supposed to be a life-affirming celebration of one of New York’s most vibrant neighborhoods, full of color, romance, and big group dance numbers. Instead for many viewers, the musical of the moment was filmed and performed by one man, alone in isolation from the comfort (or discomfort, really) of his own home, with songs centered on techno paranoia, mental health, and the fear of aging. Maybe after a year stuck in their homes, audiences could relate to the existential dread and general anxiety on display in Bo Burnham: Inside more than a conventional movie musical.

Billed as a stand-up special, Burnham’s latest musical comedy endeavor finds the former wunderkind holed up and feeling more uncomfortable than ever. Writing, editing, directing, and performing from a claustrophobic studio, Burnham’s stand-up special skews more toward being a straight-up musical, and not because the special is light on jokes and missing an audience. Rather this has all the hallmarks of a musical narrative and plays closer to experimental cinema than sketch comedy.

Burnham expresses his characters’ inner-thoughts, fears, and desires via song throughout a contained narrative, in this case the narrative being one man trying to occupy himself during a pandemic. It has ballads, charm songs, comedy numbers, “I Am” and “I Want” songs, and a big reprise. By capturing his personal pandemic experience and putting the whole affair to song, Burnham has created one of the most compelling (and catchy!) accounts of life during 2020.

To celebrate the musical that we all needed after a year in our homes, we’ve decided to rank every song from Bo Burnham: Inside. You can stream along via the Inside (The Songs) album on the streaming platform of your choice.

20. I Don’t Wanna Know

Merely an interlude, “I Don’t Wanna Know” doesn’t quite work outside of watching the special itself. However, it is a clever way to address the fact that modern audiences do not have the attention span to sit through a film at home without checking their phone or complaining about a runtime.

19. Bezos II

While certainly meant to poke fun at the real-life Lex Luthor, it’s not that fun to listen to Bezos’ name repeated. Stil, Burnham does elicit a few laughs with his over-the-top mock congratulations. “You did it!”

18. Any Day Now

A Sesame Street-like mantra that plays over the credits, “Any Day Now” suggests this could all end either hopefully soon or on a depressingly vague far-off date that will never come. We’d like to think it’s the former, but it’s safe to assume what Bo thinks.

17. All Time Low

While this number gets docked points for its short runtime, it absolutely packs a punch with its four-line, single verse. After Bo admits that his mental health is rapidly deteriorating, he describes what it’s like to have a panic attack set to a chipper ‘80s dance backbeat. Unfortunately, we don’t get to ride the wave long enough, and judging lyrics, that’s probably a good thing for Bo.

16. Content

This strong opening number musically sets the vibe for Inside, letting us know that we’re in for some synth-heavy throwback beats that would be best listened to underneath a disco ball.  Also incorporating silly backing vocals, a hallmark of many of Inside’s best tracks, Burnham declares he’s back with some sweet, sweet content. “Daddy made you your favorite,” he sings, and he ain’t wrong. 

15. Bezos I

Unlike the reprise in “Bezos II,” “Bezos I” gets by off its increasingly deranged energy, with Burnham roasting fellow tech billionaires and working himself up into a manic frenzy by song’s end. Musically, it sounds like the soundtrack to an intense boss battle on a Sega Genesis game before ending with a sick little synth solo and Burnham hilarious squawking. It’s arguably the only acceptable thing that Bezos has ever been associated with.

14. Unpaid Intern

While “Unpaid Intern” is one of Inside’s shortest tracks, it absolutely makes the most of its time. The jazzy tune scorches the exploitative nature of unpaid internships before Burnham breaks out into a laugh-out-loud worthy scat routine. It unfortunately ends too soon.

13. Shit

Inside’s funkiest jam sounds like Burnham wrote the lyrics for a new Janelle Moane album cut. Bo show’s off his vocal dexterity and plumbs the depths of his depression in a surprisingly danceable fashion. Throwing in a little faux crowd interaction helps bring home the fact that we have all felt like this at one point or another during the pandemic.

12. Sexting

This slow-jam details the complications of sexting, throwing out hilariously too-true punchlines like “the flash makes my dick look frightened.” “Sexting” feels like one of a few songs that could most easily appear on previous Burnham specials. Proving that Inside’s musical textures do not come exclusively from ’80s synth pop, the outro of the song expertly mirrors modern pop trends by throwing in some trap-influenced “yahs” at the end of Bo’s lines.

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11. How the World Works

Influenced by comedian Hans Teeuwen and children’s entertainment in general, “How the World Works” finds Burnham going back to the well by playing the ignorant, smarmy white guy who is oblivious of the real issues plaguing nonwhite Americans. What’s even better though is Socko calling Burnham out on forcing others to educate him for his own self-actualization instead of doing the work on his own for the betterment of others.

Socko pointedly asks “Why do you rich f—— white people insist on seeing every socio-political conflict through the myopic lens of your own self-actualization?” Not to keep things too heavy, the song ends with an absurdist bit where Burnham returns Socko to the nether place that he goes when he’s not attached to Burnham’s hand. Scathing and bizarre, it’s a great piece of social commentary. 

10. FaceTime With My Mom

While most of the music of Inside feels directly transported from the 1980s, “FaceTime With My Mom” seems only inspired by the past decade’s musical trends, updating the sounds in much of the same way that the Weeknd and Dua Lipa have. This is Bo Burnham as a hitmaker, and his attempt is convincing. “FaceTime With My Mom” earns easy laughs by getting to the seemingly specific, yet universal things that all our moms do over video chat. 

9. Goodbye

Every good musical needs a good closing track, and Burnham nails it with “Goodbye,” pulling off a reprise that weaves in many of the special’s signature musical moments and touches on the special’s core themes. A forlorn piano ballad before it soars through Inside’s best motifs, “Goodbye” caps a triumphant musical achievement, coming back to “Look Who’s Inside Again” just to punch you in the gut one last time. 

8. Problematic

Addressing his past work and some aspects that have not aged well, while also skewering celebrity apologies, “Problematic” is self-aware critique by way of an ‘80s workout bop. From the specific Aladdin confession to the overall apology for being “vaguely shitty,” Bo has never made accountability sound so good.

7. That Funny Feeling

This is Bo Burnham’s version of Father John Misty’s “Holy Shit,” a laundry list of all the stupid things that are signaling the fall of culture and civilization as we know it. If Misty hadn’t gotten there first, we may have had this one ranked higher. Still, Burnham manages to come up with a sticky chorus that you’ll be humming the next time something makes you feel like you’re living in the uncanny valley.

6. White Woman’s Instagram

Perhaps the special’s most playful moment, “White Woman’s Instagram” uses the musical cues of an inspiring empowerment anthem to poke fun at the predictably, perfectly curated feed of a “girl boss” Instagram. The song is greatly enhanced by the accompanying visuals, which find Bo recreating the meticulously staged and glamorous portraits that women pass off as their everyday lives.

However, Bo always likes to sneak in some sentimentality, and imagines a genuinely heartfelt post to his white woman character’s deceased mother. Don’t worry, the emotional moment doesn’t overstay its welcome, and we’re soon back to laughing at horribly derivative political street art.

5. All Eyes on Me

The droning synth and pitch-down vocals make “All Eyes On Me” oddly hypnotic and beautiful. The song seems to be addressing Bo’s depression along with his need for validation and attention, a juxtaposition that many performers deal with. It becomes clear that Burnham isn’t addressing an invisible audience, but himself, trying to will himself up and out of his dreary mental state.

4.  Look Who’s Inside Again

A classic “I Am” musical song, “Look Who’s Inside Again” just may be Inside’s most emotionally resonant track that seems to hit closest to who Bo Burnham was and who he is today. This is the song that I will most likely regret the most for ranking so low.

“Well, well, look who’s inside again. Went out to look for a reason to hide again,” perfectly describes the cycle of depression and will, for me, be the special’s most lasting moment. The downbeat ending “come out with your hands up, we’ve got you surrounded” is heartbreaking enough to send a shudder down your spine.

3. Comedy

The special’s real first number is absolutely packed with hooks, from the “Call me and I’ll tell you a joke” bridge to the “Should I be joking at a time like this?” change-up. This is Bo really flexing how far he’s come as a musician, expertly utilizing autotune and a key change (us “stupid motherf***ers” can’t resist them).

“Comedy” also finds Bo comfortably in the lane that we’re most used to seeing him in, playing the egomaniacal white messiah with a wink. “Comedy” is the tone-setter and it’s so good that it lets you know that you’re in good hands for the next hour plus.

2. 30

Either I’m ranking this song too highly due to its personally relatable nature or the fact that I haven’t been able to get “All my stupid friends are having stupid children” out of my head, but I really don’t care. “30” is Inside’s biggest earworm and addresses the existential terror that comes with no longer getting pats on the back for being a young wunderkind.

“30” also examines generational differences, showing how 30 year-old people are more infantile than ever. However, at the end of the day it all comes back to those shimmering keys and that irresistible refrain. Apologies to my friends with children.

1. Welcome to the Internet

No matter how deep and emotionally rich some of Inside’s other tracks may be, “Welcome to the Internet” is the one that will live on the longest. If this were a traditional musical, this would the antagonists’ showstopper; a vaudevillian romp through the alluring chaos that is the internet. Speeding up and slowing down the pace to mirror the manic, addictive nature of surfing the net, Burnham pitches the negative aspects of online culture as they are: a feature, not a bug. Promising “a little bit of everything all of the time,” “Welcome to the Internet” is almost as enticing as the dark tool itself.

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[clubcreative]

Career Path for Illustration

You’ve realized your dream of a career geared towards art and that’s awesome! But deciding on one specific job is no easy feat, especially not when there are so many options out there in the illustrative industry. 

Like I mentioned in my previous posts, you could be a video game illustrator, or a comic book creator! 

Those are only two options. While I was researching the different career options I became slightly overwhelmed. Perhaps you’ve felt the same? 

Lucky for us, there is one possible career that doesn’t have to be specific. The career I’d like to explore with you is that of a Freelance Illustrator!

What Does It Mean to be Freelance?

you are your own boss! You basically take your art, and choose what you want to do with it. 

Want to make clothing like OMOCAT? (check out her shop!) Then you can! Want to apply as a background artist for Netflix? You could do that too! 

Being a freelance illustrator sounds like a dream, but it’s not for the undisciplined artist. 

It would be nice to only have to worry about creating new pieces, but in reality you also have to worry about the business aspect of working.

Yes, that means taxes, seeking out clients, keeping up contacts, and more. 

If being a freelance illustrator has caught your attention, here’s some ways to get there.

Before the Job Hunt: Schooling

art source

Your first step is to decide if you are going to go to art school or University. Art school may seem like the better option but actually, some universities ARE the best art schools! For example, there’s University of California, Southern California and UCLA.

Once you decide your school, it’s important to have the proper education if you even want to be considered for a hiring. Here are some things to help guide you.

Consideration 1: Choice of Majors!

Art Studio (Under a Fine Arts Degree)

Graphic Design 

Cinema and Digital Technology 

Fashion

Animation

Currently, I have declared as an art studio major! For me my classes are centered around art techniques for traditional art, such as Beginning painting, Advance Drawing: Black and White, and Beginning printmaking. 

In general, classes for these majors will be hands on and more intimate. Typically a size of 25 students, each with their own space to create their own projects assigned by the teacher. 

Programs will also focus on multiple techniques and styles of art in the beginning classes, but as your classes become more advanced the skills and subject matter will get more specific!

Consideration 2: Internships 

Internships are an excellent way to get experience before applying for an actual job! Some art schools, like CalArts, offer internships with Disney! Using the Disney example, interns shadow under professionals in the field, and through their mentors contribute to the art, storytelling, and characters of a project in a business-like setting, along with other interns and professionals.

Consideration 3: Advanced Degree 

Degrees for a career in illustration look like this: 

Required: High School Diploma

Required for more advanced jobs: Bachelor’s Degree, Master’s Degree

A Master’s Degree typically takes 1-2 years. Here’s a list of some excellent grad schools! 

If you want jobs at prestiges places like Disney, Netflix, or Cartoon Network, then getting a Master’s Degree sounds like a good game plan! 

Freelance jobs that are more focused on self-promotion and creating your own books, comics, and merchandise like the career of illustrator RossDraws, then advanced schooling is less of a concern.

Starting the Actual Job Hunt! Navigating the Industry

art source

At the Beginning Level

When you first enter the field, you’ll need to start out in an entry-level positions. 

Typically, whether it be for advertising or books, you can start out working for individual/ smaller companies, and as you get more experience you can then move onto bigger studios and jobs. 

During your beginning years you will need: 

a highschool degree

1-2 years of experience prior (can be in the form of internships)

important skills like: time management, collaborative ability, 

understanding of art fundamentals

Application Process

Step 1: Look for job listings on sites like Indeed.com, LinkedIn, or ZipRecruiter

Step 2: After choosing a job to apply to, look at the requirements and make sure you fit them!

Step 3: Send in your portfolio to be reviewed. 

In the art world, your art portfolio is the most important thing you have. It’s your special weapon, a collection of your artwork that you show to potential employers to say “this is who I am and this is what I can do” 

The biggest driving force in getting hired is your portfolio!

Additional Information: Special Certifications to Consider

Here are some art programs that you should be proficient in:

-Adobe Photoshop

Adobe Illustrator

-Adobe Creative Cloud 

-Blunder

-FL Studio 11 

These are only a few. There are a lot more that could be useful to master! Here’s a list.

Final Thoughts on Life as a Freelance Artist

In a field as competitive as the art industry, being a Freelance Illustrator can be difficult and intimidating, but the ability to shape your career however you want it to be, well, that’s a hard offer to ignore. 

If you’re still on the fence, here is the salary of a typical Freelance Illustrator: 

In general, freelance artists make about $48,000 a year and professionals can make up to an average of $80,000. 

Hopefully, after our time exploring the ins-and-outs of Freelance Illustrators together, you are more motivated to make your dreams of being an artist a reality! 

Freelance illustration is only one path out of many. Good luck to the both of us on our terrifying, yet thrilling art journey. 

[collaborativedocumenteditingsoft]

The Lost Secret to Post Production Workflow Found

Panel or drag an asset to a monitor from the MediaCentral

Every video engineer has his or her own preferred method for navigating this stage, but it’s important to hit a few key steps. When it comes to creating video and audio content, there are three key production phases. To really understand how post-production works, here’s a closer look at each phase. This is more important if you’re an amateur or independent filmmaker and you partner with a video production company to help manage your post-production needs.

What is the final stage for picture editing in the post production workflow process?

Introduction (with title, release date, background information) Summary of the story. Analysis of the plot elements (rising action, climax) Creative elements (dialogues, characters, use of colors, camera techniques, mood, tone, symbols, costumes or anything that contributes or takes away from the overall plot)

According to Doug Mountain, Supervising Sound Editor for Warner Brothers Post Production Services, he can spend as much as 20 hours just scrubbing unwanted noise from dialogue recordings for every episode of a show like Walking Dead. If you had a plan of editing your film on your laptop forget about it. The post-production workflow for the RED Dragon 6K is a beast and you would not be able to edit at home. You would then need to hire an editor who can handle that workflow and understands where his work is going to next, color grading.

THINGS: on Demystifying Video Codecs

As part of the apps suite, Google Docs is a word processing app for teams and it allows you to create and manage documents online very easily. Let’s look at the first insight that’ll allow us to make a collaborative text editor.

Streaming MediaMagazine

Audacity is my go-to recommendation for free audio editors, and it's the only one I've used, even if it was long ago. As I said, there are other free options and there are your paid options, but I'm not really familiar with them because I use Vegas Pro for my audio mixing (Vegas was a mulitrack audio editor before it was an NLE, and it's fantastic). So I'm not really up on the pros/cons of other editors because, well, I don't use them.

Post Production Scripts (Pps)

That article ended just shy of delivering the finished edit to Roush Media, the Digital Intermediate https://www.toodledo.com company tasked with the final delivery for the theatrical screening. Remote video editing is a great way to leverage talent globally. With robust online collaboration tools available for video and film post production workflows, producer, director and film editor can all be in different locations and work together efficiently. One of my favorite online collaboration tools is Frame.IOI can share a rough cut with producers and directors with realtime feedback, markers and comments. All members of the team can view the cut at the same time in any web browser, tablet or phone.

Can 7zip open BIN files?

Click the "Tools" button on the menu, and then select the "Convert Image File Format" option. The "convert" dialogue will be pop-up. Press the “Browse” then choose a BIN/CUE file you wish to convert and choose the “ISO files(*. iso)” option.

How do I convert a BIN file to ISO?

A BAT file is a DOS batch file used to execute commands with the Windows Command Prompt (cmd.exe). The danger: A BAT file contains a series of line commands that will run if it is opened, which makes it a good option for malicious programmers.

Cloud UX web client to work with these same assets without opening Media Composer.

Are movies getting longer?

Part (but not all) of the reason why top-grossing movies have a longer average run time is that there is a great number of extremely long outliers. 10% of top-grossing movies are longer than 140 minutes, compared with just 96% of all movies in cinemas.

Counting the hours until #nab2019 starts. See us at SL14813 and let Strawberry’s new features knock your socks off. #knocktheirsocksoff Book a meeting: https://t.co/XLxjkJ0oI4 pic.twitter.com/PWVDY8B5pb

— Projective Technology (@ProjectiveTech) April 7, 2019

Distributors routinely require filmmakers to warrant certain facts, and indemnify the distributor for any loses or legal fees incurred from a breach. Since the distributor was not present when the script was written, or the movie produced, the distributor doesn't know whether the filmmaker secured all the rights needed to exploit the film. The distributor wants to ensure that the filmmaker has a clean "chain of title" to his work. The distributor will also ask the filmmaker to warrant that the film doesn't violate any third party rights, including actions for copyright or trademark infringement, invasion of rights of privacy and publicity, and defamation.

The program did find and identify objects in my videos (even faces), but the People view didn't offer any face tagging from my video clips, which were rife with smiles. The separate Organizer app is where you import, rate, keyword tag, and share media online. It's also where you output your work to DVDs and other project formats.

Unless the film is a part of a major franchise (AKA a Disney Movie), or is an expensive action flick, chances are there’s less than 500 people working on it. These jobs are much more varied than the average moviegoer might expect. It’s obvious that there are people operating the camera, setting up the lights, decorating the set, making the costumes, and recording the sound. Here’s a brief list and summary of a few departments you might not be aware of if you’ve never stepped on a film set. Matt teaches Filmmaking at City Academy - having worked in the Film industry for over 14 years, he has worked on a range of projects from feature films to commercial videos, as well as running Filmmaking sessions for the BBC and ITV.

ART OF THE CUT with editors of “Ford v. Ferrari”

Is it safe to delete mysql bin files?

Delete Files Permanently from your Computer. When you delete a file from your computer, it moves to the Windows Recycle Bin. You empty the Recycle Bin and the file is permanently erased from the hard drive. When you delete files or folders, the data is not initially removed from the hard disk.

Include mages, videos, animations, interactivity, audio narrations, and quizzes. We are an one-stop digital agency that has delivered over 600+ live projects including mobile apps and websites. We have a highly trained team of 50+ professionals’ expert at developing E-commerce solutions, Web Applications, Mobile Apps, SEO, SMO and Digital Marketing. I am completing an internship at the UN, focusing on French/English translations, Web Content production and Social Media management.

[gracia-suficiente]

So here’s a long and detailed post of my 2017!

In years past, I’ve kept a good things jar which is nice because it helps me keep track of all the good things that happened during the year. Something like that would’ve helped a lot this year because although this year wasn’t awful, it was a challenging year. The year started off really great but then slowed down and got stressful. Towards the end though, it came back up and I’m so excited for 2018. I did keep a good things jar the first couple months of 2017, but I stopped soon after the year started. So if the rest of my post after those months isn’t that detailed, it’s because the rest of the year was a blur. 

January started off so strong! I spent New Year’s Eve with my cousin Isaac and family and I actually had a lot of fun! I even got a Native American blessing from my cousin’s wife’s grandfather who is Native American! Bailey and I talked a LOT in January; I have an embarrassing amount of good things papers about phone calls and facetimes with him. Speaking of Bailey, the app that we met on, Beme, died in January which sucked but everyone in the beme community spent the last few days sending each other fun reactions. I started my internship with my (now) previous employer on January 3! Even though I started my new internship, I went back in January for an exit interview with my old job at my university and it was so great to see my old coworkers. They were seriously some of my favorite people to work with. Also! The Catholic Campus Ministry (CCM) planning meetings for Awakening retreat began in January (tbh I forgot I served on team this year!) There were also a lot of birthday parties (James, Jayden, Alice) and even a few anniversaries (my parents and my brother’s godparents). 

February started off on a sweet note because Bailey was my Valentine and that made me really happy. Speaking of notes, my little brother had an orchestra concert this month as well! My bestie Vivian turned 24 and I had fun at her dinner; I wish I could’ve gone out with them though. I especially hated having a curfew this past year. 

March was long and stressful. Work got hectic, school got difficult, and life got hard and depressing. But March ended up being redeeming also; I got asked to be an ash distributor for the CCM campus wide Ash Wednesday mass! I also served on retreat at the end of March and it was beautiful. God’s timing is perfect and that retreat helped me so much; God is good. 

April was fun because I went to two concerts! My sister and I saw The 1975 and we were in the pit; I’ve never been so up close for a concert before. I also took my mom to see Chris Tomlin and that concert was so beautiful. It was also fun to do something with my mom! Easter happened right before all of the concerts and Easter is probably my second favorite holiday; I love it so much. 

May was a good month; I graduated from college with my master’s degree! All of the graduation festivities were so much fun; there was graduation mass with CCM, the College of Business hooding ceremony, and then the big graduation ceremony. My family and I had a nice graduation dinner after the ceremony with a lot of family. I also got offered a full time position with the accounting firm I interned for. I started working full time after I graduated. I was so grateful for the position because I struggled to find a job when I graduated from undergrad. Job security is nice. 

I saw Miike Snow in June! That was a lot of fun! It was also my first time at one of the smaller venues in my city. I racked my brain, and other than that, I can’t remember anything significant that happened in June. 

In July, I finally went to the new baseball stadium in town with my family; I say “new” but it’s been open for a couple of years now and I just hadn’t had the opportunity to go. Going to the game made me remember how much I love baseball. We went over the 4th of July weekend so we got to see fireworks too! Speaking of the 4th of July, my family and I went on the military base where my city’s symphony orchestra had a free concert and fireworks show! It was fantastic and the best 4th of July at home I’ve had in a long while. My little brother turned 15 in July! I went to a job interview with Whole Foods corporate in Austin in July and I didn’t get it. But it ended up working out for the better! And lastly, I saw Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness in July and that was probably the best concert I went to this year. I’ve never had so much fun at a concert. Also, I got to meet The Greeting Committee and A R I Z O N A afterwards too! 

What happened in August? I have no idea. According to my memory, calendar, and photo albums, not much. 

But not to worry! September made up for the lame August I had! My cousin’s cousin (who is my age and I kinda grew up with) got married the first weekend in September! I turned 24 in September and I spent my birthday at my city’s art museum and I had dinner with my grandparents and family at my favorite restaurant. My parents’ birthdays followed soon after and were fun as well! And then came my Richmond adventure with Bailey! Such. a. great. weekend. After that, my sister and I saw Two Door Cinema Club! 

October was hectic with work but I did get to see Portugal. the Man on Friday the 13th! Near the end of the month, my other cousin’s fiance had a bridal shower and it was so much fun getting to know her a little more. 

November was fun because my sister turned 21! I also began taking Christian Formation classes at my church in order to become a Eucharistic Minister. I loved learning about my faith and getting to interact with other Catholics. My cousin Nicole had her last high school football game EVER (she’s in marching band) so my family and I went to cheer her on. I went to a job interview mid-November for the job that I currently have now. God is so good and I am thankful that He opened up this door for me in Austin. My family and I spent Thanksgiving at my cousin Isaac’s house and it was so much fun! 

December was a whirlwind. I saw Pale Waves with my sister on the 4th. I got assigned to a really big audit at work and I put in my two weeks notice. That was rough. My bestie and I took a trip to Santa Fe to go to a museum. My cousin Nicole turned 18! My little brother had his Christmas orchestra concert. I went to my previous employer’s Christmas party and then the happy hour after. I was invited to be a part of my middle school’s career day (how old am I??). My family and I moved all my stuff to my new apartment in Austin. We spent Christmas with my two aunts who live in the area. Then we came back to go to my cousin’s wedding at the end of the month. I visited an old friend in the hospital with my bestie because she had a beautiful baby boy. And we spent New Year’s Eve at my house with my cousins and tias. December was so wild and I never had a month fly by so quickly; there were so many people I wanted to say goodbye to but I didn’t get the chance. I’m so excited for the new year and what the change will bring for me! 

A few lists of things I saw/read/listened to in 2017 (probably not complete as my memory is awful and I didn’t keep track of anything):

Movies I saw: The Accountant, The Infiltrator, Lego: Batman Movie, Thor Ragnorak, The Hitman’s Body Guard, The Big Sick

TV shows I watched: Sherlock, Stranger Things, American Vandal, Over the Garden Wall

Books I read: Journal 3 by Alex Hirsh, Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage by Haruki Murakami, The Glass Menagerie by Tennessee Williams

Concerts I went to: The 1975 (with Colouring and Pale Waves), Worship Night in America (Chris Tomlin with Phil Wickam, Big Daddy Weave, and another band I can’t remember right now), Miike Snow (with The Other Half), Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness (with A R I Z O N A and The Greeting Committee), Portugal. the Man, Pale Waves (with The Candescents) [I had tickets to see Foster the People and Atlas Genius but both shows got canceled]

Albums I bought: Gracetown - San Cisco, Harry Styles - Harry Styles, What If Nothing - Walk the Moon, Reputation - Taylor Swift, Sacred Hearts Club - Foster the People, Kaleidoscope EP - Coldplay, Melodrama - Lorde, Unpeeled - Cage the Elephant, GALLERY - A R I Z O N A, Meeting People Is Easy - The Greeting Committee, Gameshow Live at KCRW - Two Door Cinema Club

#2017 #personal #audit life #bailey

[loyallogic]

How to prepare for judiciary while in law school

This article is written by Jolly Tewari, Trainee Associate at LawSikho. 

  Introduction 

It comes to every law student’s mind, once enrolled in a law school, that it is the most elite profession a person can enter into. With passing years after numerous moots, internships, seminars, meeting new people you find various other good career options as well.

If you are determined from the beginning that you want to clear the judicial services exam it is excellent because it gives you an edge over others.

While in law school, one can focus on those topics that are important from the point of judicial services exam, which in future will save you a lot of time when preparing for it. It is okay to not have a plan from the beginning or till last year of graduation, it is okay to be clueless but once you decide that you want to be a judge, you should be clear with the purpose. Judiciary is the highest wing and that is what makes it a highly respectable job.

When to start?

It is better if you are clear from starting because you will study accordingly. It is also okay if you are starting two years or one year early because what counts is focus, discipline, determination and a good strategy.

How to start?

From very starting you should be clear about the state as every state has its own pattern. Preparing for multiple states can be a waste of time and effort.

Start your preparations with bare acts, as law colleges focus on the syllabus they hardly focus on substantive laws or municipal laws. Study bare acts along with interpretations and illustrations- break it into parts and then study about 10 sections or 5 sections a day. Preparing for multiple states can be a waste of time and effort.

For example, In Delhi and Haryana, the questions are asked from the practical and conceptual application of law but in UP, the focus on theoretical concepts is more. 

Start reading the newspaper, you should know what is going around in the world. Work on your language- start giving at least half an hour to your writing skills in English as well as in Hindi as people often tend to underestimate English language. GK & current affairs also demand equal attention as in Preliminary GK and English section itself contains the same amount of weightage like other 9 law subjects. If you are contributing half an hour daily you can complete English, Hindi and GK sections in 6 months.

Are internships necessary?

After asking my mentors and people who have already cleared the Judicial Services Examination, one thing which I found common was that doing internships made them realize what they really want to do as exploring your interests is never a bad idea.

This inclined me further towards my goal but, if you have had your mindset from the very beginning, there is little need to do internships. It will save your time to focus on academics more. But doing an internship in a lower court gives the inside picture of the court which is very different from what is portrayed in cinemas. Doing an internship under a Judge will be beneficial, it will give the impression that you were resolute from the beginning to become a Judge. It will help you in interviews and also brush up your skills.

Is coaching necessary?

Coaching institutions have some advantages as they provide you with guidance, methods, mock exams that push you to work for more. We live in a world full of distractions so investing money in these institutions reminds you of your purpose. At the end of the day, it is you who has to persevere. If you can manage your time and are disciplined, coaching is not necessary.

What subjects to study for Judiciary?

Everything you are studying in your law school will help you further in your Judicial services examination but law schools try to cover it in one semester which is not possible if you want to study it conceptually, try to break those subjects in parts and complete it in 2-3 semesters. In Judicial services, law is the key subject, which includes substantive as well as procedural laws, but law schools hardly focus on municipal laws which is an important part of Judiciary. 

Procedural laws

Substantive laws

Code of Civil Procedure, 1908

Indian Penal Code, 1860

Code of Criminal Procedure, 1973

Hindu & Mohammedan Law

Indian Evidence Act, 1872

Transfer of Property Act, 1882

Limitation Act, 1963

Indian Contract Act, 1872

Indian Registration Act, 1908 

Partnership Act, 1932

In some states (UP, West Bengal, Bihar, Jharkhand etc.), Constitutional Law, International Law and Jurisprudence are also covered. In Delhi, Constitutional law is also included in Preliminary exam, real syllabus reflects in the previous year question papers. Let’s take an example of IPC where most of the questions in the preliminary exams are asked from chapter 16 and 17 so this is how you get to know what is important and what not. After going through previous year papers you would be able to discard what is not of much importance.

What are some of the books which can be referred to?

Subjects

Recommended Book(s)

Criminal Code of Procedure

Rv Kelkar

Indian Penal Code

KD Gaur, Ashok Jain (Dukki)

Indian Evidence Act

Batuk Lal, Ashok Jain (Dukki)

Civil Procedure Code

Ck Thakka (Takwani)

Indian Contract Act

Dr Avtar Singh, Rk Bangia

Sales of Goods Act

Mulla

Indian Partnership Act

Avtar Singh, Rk Bangia, Mulla

Specific Relief Act

Rk Bangia

Indian Limitation Act

Jd Jain (Bare Act)

Hindu Law

Dr Kusum, Dr P Saxena, Dukki

Muslim Law

Faizee, Dukki

Indian Registration Act

Jps Sirahi

To study from Mains point of view or Preliminary?

Firstly, never assume that post Preliminary exam, you will get time to study for Mains, Study for Mains beforehand. You can even prepare for Preliminary and Mains simultaneously.

As major subjects take time (approx 2-3 months) you can divide the time accordingly or you can simultaneously take 1 major subject with 2-3 minor subjects. As when you will be done with a major subject, simultaneously 2-3 minor subjects will already be covered. 

You must know what is expected of you in exams because judicial exams across the states do not require much apart from a conceptual clarity of what you are already studying in your law school. Do not be a rote-learner.

           Click Above

How to prepare for an Interview?

Personality, confidence, legal knowledge and application of mind is what is checked in an interview. Well, if you score decent marks in your mains paper, interview will hardly count so your focus should be on mains, anyway interview will help you get a good rank. 

The word preparation for an interview is outdated as they have already checked your knowledge, what they want to check is your personality. 

Judiciary syllabus is immense than the syllabus of law schools- how to fill this gap?

Law schools hardly focus on municipal laws in comparison to corporate and International Laws. So your focus should be to break them and study like in 2-3 semesters because you cannot learn the whole of CPC in one semester, you have to break it up and learn- which rarely happens in law schools. 

You should study according to the evolving Judicial Examination trend because many amendments have come in the past few years. It is overarching to try to prepare according to the current trend. Studying those old and landmark cases will not help. When you see the latest case laws, take a liberal interpretation. 

Judiciary is evolving at a fast pace, the applications which were not allowed before are allowed now. The approach to fundamental rights has changed, for example, the rule of local standi has been relaxed so only if a student knows these amendments then only he can apply those.

Is the syllabus of LLM different from the Judiciary?

LLM is a specialization in a particular field of law and it is more objective than subjective. So, yes, if you think to prepare for LLM, it will help you crack judicial exams then you are wrong but vice-versa is possible because preparing for judiciary requires you to study the core of law which might help in clearing LLM exams as well, as it is always better to have a backup plan. 

LLM’s syllabus keeps on changing- first, it was objective then some part of it was subjective and law of torts is asked in LLM examinations in more detail than in judiciary so yes there is a bit difference so prepare according to that.

Does the number of vacancies play any role in cracking the exam?

Vacancies do play an important role. This year DJS released 30 vacancies only and in the past few years, a vast state like Uttar Pradesh did not release enough vacancies. There is no All India Judicial Examination but in future, it might become one.

You need a systematic preparation and approach, and preparing for many states at once will put pressure and you will lose your time and concentration. You should also consider having a backup career option and try to concentrate on 2-3 states. Narrow down your choice to 2-3 priority states. It is not that you will not be allowed to take exams for other states but basic groundwork and the foundation stone would be based on your top priorities. Once you have created that, you can build upon it like a pyramid. Don’t lose focus and get overwhelmed.

Does maintaining a good percentage in college necessary or we can get average marks and devote our time to Judiciary exam preparation?

Being a topper is not what the Judiciary exam demands. That does not mean that you are getting backlogs. maintaining an average percentage is enough.

In a recent judgement of the Bombay High Court, a person can only become a judge if he has cleared all his semester exams in the first attempt. It is not a judgment from the Supreme court or other courts, but keep your grades intact for the safer side.

Maintaining an average percentage is enough.

How to prepare GK and Current Affairs for Judicial services?

Indian Geography can be studied from Ghatna chakra and NCERT. (If you have more than 6 months for preparation, only then choose to go through NCERT).

Indian History can be covered from Lucent’s, Ghatna Chakra and NCERT.

Indian Economy, Indian Art and Culture and science(in Bihar and UP questions arise more from science) and from Lucent’s as well. Go through the newspaper daily, you should be aware of the current affairs, even 1 week before exams. Stay updated and aware of any latest legal amendments.

How to make notes

You need to keep in mind that your notes should be concise, it should not be a direct copy of books but a derivative of your own conclusion.

In making notes, the emphasis should be on two things- its brevity and completeness, but if you are doing coaching, making notes would be useless just jot down the conclusion of those notes. 

Do extracurricular activities give any shape to the study of Judiciary?

No, they do not. To make your CV diverse, you can do moots but such titles hold little importance in Judiciary.

How to manage studies with internships?

Doing internships just for certificate sake won’t help, asking a mentor to give you work which will help you in the long run. Like while interning in a court student’s say, they only get labor work such as carrying files and taking dates. 

So this is the biggest mistake which interns make. Instead of utilising each and every minute, they waste their whole day doing unnecessary stuff and learn nothing. Try to ask questions and take work related to what you are studying, learn to draft (helps you everywhere), so this is how your internships will act as a boon for your studies, takeout at least 2 hours daily for your preparation in-between internship duration, just don’t waste your time there sitting ideal or gossiping. 

Conclusion

Make learning a fun activity by using techniques like breaking, drawing pie-chart, flow charts, using grouping method, one word technique (every article or section has a key around which the whole section or article can be woven, comparison etc). Revision is a key factor in your study for the exams, without revision whatever you are studying will go in vain, and every part of your study should be planned and mentored properly.

LawSikho has created a telegram group for exchanging legal knowledge, referrals and various opportunities. You can click on this link and join:

https://t.me/joinchat/J_0YrBa4IBSHdpuTfQO_sA

Follow us on Instagram and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more amazing legal content.

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How to prepare for judiciary while in law school published first on https://namechangers.tumblr.com/

[tweenw]

Sunrise-(Stuart Twombly)

Characters: OC, Billy, Neha, Nick, Yo-Yo, Lyle, Graham, Stuart and (Y/N).

Warnings: none

Pairing: Stuart x Reader

Word Count: 3718

Summary: just a mini fic about the movie The Internship I wrote for fun :)(some of you guys also requested it, so here it is, Teen Wolf imagine should be up tomorrow) Guys wooo this is finally up, I didn’t know if I should post it since I’m writing a Stuart fanfic on Wattpad anyway, but here it is :)

I watch with a sinking feeling in my stomach as everyone around me parts ways and joins up to form small groups they’ll be working with for the rest of this internship. My friends also disperse, not even bothering to call me into their group. I frown a little. They probably brought me here just to make fun of my lack of social skills and see how badly I’ll fail. Well, this internship is going amazing so far.

I came here to get a new job, yes, but also to make some new friends. And so far I’m all alone. 

I look around the room and notice a boy with a blue beanie and thick-rimmed glasses sitting alone on his phone. A thought passes through my mind, maybe he doesn’t have a team either? There’s only one way to find out.

I stand up and smooth my skirt down, before picking up my backpack and walking to sit down next to him with a small smile. He looks up from his phone with a raised eyebrow.

“Hey, I’m (Y/N). You don’t have a team either, I take it?” I ask and offer another smile. He looks really cute, there are a few moles littering his pale face which make his look cuter and unique. He’s unlike the other stuck-up guys here. Like that guy Graham, who I swear has a stick up his ass. 

“I’m Stuart, and no, I don’t.” He nods a little before looking back down at his phone. I furrow my eyebrows a little at how disinterested he looks. He’s the type who would spend him last dying moments checking Instagram probably. 

Well, okay then. I take my own phone out and mimic his position, one leg crossed over at the ankle and one hand on my lap. I scroll through Tumblr and watch him out of the corner of my eyes. He doesn’t notice.

“Take it you’re a phone type of guy.” I say, sarcasm evident. He just grunts and doesn’t even look up. With a sigh, I give up on small talk and go back to my phone. If we miraculously end up on a team together, I swear I will annoy him as much as possible until he cracks and has a conversation with me that lasts longer that 5 seconds and involves actual words instead of grunts.

“Okay, you two, you two, and you two, come here.” A young guy with glasses exclaims and points to me and Stuart, as well as four other people. Two guys who look like they could be the CEO’s of this place and another girl with long brown hair who’s with a guy who has oddly shaped eyebrows. They look a little confused before coming to stand next to us. ‘

Stuart look up from his phone and gives me a questioning look. I just shrug and look up at the guy who called them over. 

“Okay, so my name’s Lyle, and I’ll be your mentor of sorts. Your leader, your boss, your ring leader, your inciter, your top dog, your-” Lyle starts to act all hip, his body swaying like Snoop Dogg’s when he’s had a few spliffs. He gets interrupted by the older blond guy who looks creeped out. 

“Alright Lil Wayne, we get it. I’m Nick, and this is my friend since the medieval ages, Billy.” He introduces his friend, and looks at the other girl to pick up where he left from. 

She looks around with a small smile. “I’m Neha and you’re really weird. Also are you guys related?” The girl looks at Lyle witch wide eyes before pointing at Stuart and I. We’re both sitting the exact same way. Literally. Stuart looks at me with a ‘really?’ look before shaking his head at her. 

I roll my eyes. “I’m (Y/N), and this is Stuart. He doesn’t talk much, often communicates with grunts and inaudible noises. I’m sure he’s smart when he decides to talk though.” I smile at the group. They nod and look at the other guy. He’s Chinese and just replies with ‘Yo-Yo’ before looking at the rest of us expectantly. Like we know what to do. 

“Okay, I’ll take you to your pod, your nest, your studio, where you’ll be working while you’re here in the whack-o house. So follow me.” Lyle sways his whole body again before walking down a couple of hallways. Stuart and I both exchange a weird look at how our ‘mentor’ is acting. He’s definitely weird, but I guess weird is good. It’s much better than having a boring and dis-interested ‘boss’. 

As Stuart stands up, I grab a hold his beanie and run past him as a chorus of protests follows me. I dodge a few people as I try put his beanie on and run into the pod Lyle pointed to at the same time. I barely dodge the clear glass door before I make it in and collapse on a beanbag in the corner, slightly out of breath. God help my poor physique. I need to hit the gym instead of Pizza Hut.

I watch with a small smile as the group comes into the pod with grins on their faces at how annoyed Stuart looks. Speaking of him, he walks in next, a small pout in place. It’s quite adorable, actually. He looks like a child who got his ball taken from him. In this case, a child who got his phone taken away.

I pout back extra hard, and for a second I think he’s going to storm over and take his beanie back with a few of my hairs he might pull out in the process. But no, he just ruffles his hair and sits down in the beanbag next to me with an eye-roll and a huff, looking at his phone once again. 

A small smile of victory appears as I look at Stuart. Maybe we’ll end up being friends after all. 

“Watch out!” Stuart yells as I bump into him with my hot chocolate. Some of it spills onto his button-up and if looks could kill, I would have been gone the first day of this internship. 

I look at him apologetically and set my hot chocolate down before beginning to wipe his shirt down with the napkins I have with me. My hands shake a little, probably from the lack of sleep and amounts of stress this internship has brought along. I sigh in frustration and keep rubbing the stains in his shirt vigorously until I hear him hiss in pain and step back from me. 

I look up at him with wide eyes, realizing that I had probably hurt him. Oh god that was the least of my intentions. I back away a little and shake my head. “I’m so sorry.” I mumble before taking off in the opposite direction of the confused Stuart. 

The past few weeks have been so hectic and nerve-wrecking and just full of pent up emotion. We’ve had our asses handed to us by Graham’s team on multiple occasions, there’s been a lot of arguing between our group lately, and I’ve gotten a crush on the emotionally incompetent Stuart Twombly. So my emotional ass has had just about enough. 

I walk into our little pod and plop in the corner beanbag. It’s sort of became my beanbag since we came here. Luckily, the pod is empty so I don’t have to deal with questions on why I look like I’ve been run over by a bus. Truth be told, I stopped trying to look impressive and wearing dresses with heels to look presentable about a week into the internship. It was too tiring.

I rest my head against the glass wall and take in a few deep breaths to calm myself down. I mentally count to 10, before opening my eyes. I need to stop acting like I’m an 80 year old who’s tired of everything.

My eyes wander to the door of the pod where Stuart is leaning against the door frame with a slight frown. 

I offer him a light smile in attempts to ward him off. If he thinks I’m calm now he’ll leave me alone. Plus, he’s not good at dealing with people, only shutting them out from what I’ve found out.

Though as he makes his way into the pod and squats in front of me, my hopes vanish. He looks at me with a slight frown, before removing his blue beanie and putting it on my head. Once he adjusts it, he smiles slightly at his work. 

“Billy and Nick arranged a little outing tonight, and they told me to tell you the details” He smiles a little and sits cross-legged in front of me. I look at him curiously. He doesn’t seem bothered about the hot chocolate stains, or me running off, or us alone right now. He looks more relaxed than I’d ever seen him before. That sight alone relaxes me a little.

“I bet you by the end of their ‘outing’ Yo-Yo will have only 1 eyebrow left.” I chuckle a little and shake my head. The poor boy must have went through some seriously tough punishments incorporated by his strict mother. 

Stuart chuckles and nods. “Probably, yeah. Anyway, it’s just getting together for some food and maybe exploring the town. We’re all meeting here at 6.” He smiles, before standing up and offering his hand to help me up. I blush a little and take it. 

“Thanks for the beanie, and also I am extremely sorry for that shirt.” I smile sheepishly at him. That may or may not have been my brightest moment. But that’s what you get when you have slides at the workplace and people come at you out of nowhere.

“It’s okay, though let’s not make it a habit. But you could do with some relaxation.” He jokes, before rubbing the back of his head and walking out of the pod. A huge smile appears on my face.

When Nick and Billy said they wanted to have a little ‘outing’, I was expecting a buffet and maybe a cinema trip. But now that I’m surrounded by half-naked women and lap-dances, I don’t know why I’m not surprised. It’s Billy and Nick after all.

Our little group sits in the corner booth, shots covering the entire table. Yo-Yo’s probably seeing triple by now, poor guy. But it’s not like we pressured him into downing like 8 shots in a row, one after the other. It’s really a miracle that he’s not projectile vomiting yet. 

I myself have had quite a few shots of god knows what, but only enough to give me a buzz and make me all giddy and jumpy. That’s the type of drunk that’s the best.

“I’m going into that water tank!” I yell over at the group before grabbing Neha’s hands and dragging her with me. We both laugh at the absurd idea, but still go up to the girl in the tank and ask if she can let us in. For a second I think we’ll get rejected, but she just smiles at us before dragging us in and closing the door so no water gets out. 

I’m glad that the water is warm and not cold, because that would have made me regret my decision. Neha starts dancing like there’s no tomorrow, grinding on the glass and floor and anything she can get her hands on, including me. Okay, so maybe she’s had slightly more to drink than I did.

We both copy some of the moves the strippers are doing, and I’m surprised neither of us fall down. But I’m having fun, which is the most important thing. 

I take off my flannel which leaves me in a tank top and begin to sway my hips ‘Gimme Gimme’ by Britney. I flip my hair all over the place and for a second I truly feel like a stripper. I let that thought slide and grind against the girl who’s name I learned is Crystal.

Stuart’ P.O.V

(Y/N). The girl with a strange addiction to garlic bread and a smile which could melt Putin’s heart. (Y/N), the girl who looks more like a stripper in that water tank than the actual stripper. I can’t help but look over at her, the way her body’s moving is downright sinful. 

“The world looks much better 3 inches up, doesn’t it?” Nick slides next to me and points to (Y/N) and Neha who are grinding against each other.

I look at Nick with wide eyes, a feeling of dread seeping through me as I’ve been caught checking out the one girl who’s had my attention since the very first day. 

“I guess.” I mumble in response and take another shot from the table, mainly to give me courage to go and speak to her. Again, it doesn’t particularly work. 

Nick sighs and shakes his head at me. “Listen Stuart, you’ve had your eyes on her since she stole your beanie at the start of this internship. You stalk her on exchangeagram and that Thumble thing when the real thing is right in front of you.” I look over at her, now completely soaking wet, but smiling and having fun nonetheless. 

In a way, Nick is right, though I hate to admit it. Why am I wasting my time looking at her photos when she’s just across the room? Nick does have more experience though. So maybe listening to him for once won’t be a total waste of my attention. 

“You’re right. What can go wrong?.” I huff and stand up, sliding my phone into my pocket. The alcohol buzzes through me and for a second, everything goes black.

The sun is rising, and the view at the Golden Gate Bridge is simply magnificent. Just like the view of Stuart passed out on the bench next to me. 

When everyone was too busy fighting with a bunch of frat boys, I was putting my muscles to good use and carrying a passed-out Stuart out of the mess. But now that we’re all out here, safe and sound, I’m enjoying the moment. Thank god I’ve partially dried off and sobered up though. 

The boy next to stirs, groans and slowly sits up with agony written all over his face. Poor guy will have the worst hangover, right after Yo-Yo and Lyle who are still wasted.

“Morning sleeping beauty.” I chuckle as he sits up, head in his hands. There’s a chorus of groans before he sits up properly and looks around. He seems sobered up enough, which isn’t the case for Yo-Yo or Lyle. 

“I feel like shit.” He croaks and stands up to stretch. The corners of his shirt rise to reveal his happy trail, and I swear a part of me dies off right then and there. 

I look away to hide the blush, whilst Nick pulls Stuart away to probably fill him in on the events of the night. 

Looking over at Stuart, the way his glasses sit atop his cute nose, the way his fingers always hook into his belt hoops when he’s talking to someone and doesn’t have his phone on him, and the way he absentmindedly licks his lips cause a dull ache in my chest. God fucking damn it (Y/N) get a grip.

Instead of checking out my fellow intern, I turn to see Billy and Neha in a deep conversation. I won’t bother them, they look like they’re in a little ‘zone’. On the next bench over, Yo-Yo is laying face down and groaning in pain as the alcohol takes it’s toll on him. And I don’t bother looking for Lyle, he’s in the bushes somewhere. 

After a few minutes of blissful silence on my part, just staring at the beautiful sunrise, Stuart comes to sit next to me. He looks happy, almost.

“Tonight was fun, I mean you looked like you were having fun. I just wish I stopped after the 6th shot.” Stuart chuckles as he looks over at the sunrise. There’s something different about him. He doesn’t give off the vibe Stuart from 24 hours ago did. He’s not restrained, he’s free-spirited. I like it.

“Don’t worry. I’m sure Bonnie and Clyde over there will take us there again.” I smile as Stuart lets out a whole-hearted heart laugh. He shakes his head a little before looking at me with a small smile. A really cute smile, might I add. 

“You were good in the tank by the way, very good. Almost thought you were one of the girls.” Stuart grins a lopsided grin which makes me feel so many goddamn ways. I widen my eyes at him.

“I don’t know whether to be flattered or offended.” I place my hand over my chest and pretend to be offended by what he said. In reality though, I’m incredibly proud of my drunk self, and extremely proud that I was good enough to bring Stuart out of his phone bubble. 

His eyes widen like mines before he starts stuttering trying to explain it was just a compliment. This causes Nick and Billy both to laugh at how adorably flustered Stuart is. 

“It’s fine, I totally get it. What can I say, it’s a natural talent.” I giggle as Stuart takes a deep breath to recover from his stuttering rant. He’s totally flushed and looks like a tomato. I’m enjoying this.

Billy walks over to us two, phone out and a huge smile on his lips. He looks a little tipsy himself, but that’s to be expected. He did drink enough to put us all into shame. 

“Hey kids look at these.” Billy laughs and pushes us apart so he can sit in the middle and show us some photos on his phone. 

The first one is of me, Stuart and Neha posing with quidditch sticks. This was the day we all learned how addicted to 80′s references Billy and Nick are. It was also the day I hit Graham in the head with the ball. It was a good day.

 The second photo is of Yo-Yo and Billy sitting next to each other, both receiving lap-dances and high-fiving. 

“Oops.” Billy mutters before skipping over that one and onto the next one. 

That one is a close-up of me and Neha in the water tank with the stripper between the two of us. I laugh a little at that one, because a few seconds after this photo was taken, Neha slipped and fell into the big puddle. 

The next photo is of Stuart and I sitting next to each other on the bean bags on the very first day. Stuart’s looking over at me with a small smile and I’m looking over at Lyle. I remember that he was doing a really bad impression of 50 Cent and it was very disturbing. But I look at Stuart in that photo, the way he’s looking at me like I’m a bed after an extremely long day or something. A small smile comes to my face, and when Billy sees it, he immediately ups and leaves. 

Nick gives Stuart a thumbs up from what I can see, and it clicks. Billy wanted me to see it. Billy wanted me to see the way Stuart was looking at me.

“You know, I’ve never actually asked you this, but does your boyfriend not mind you being away for so long?” Stuart asks, moving closer so we’re in the same position we were before Billy came over. I fight the smile trying to break out at his bad technique of trying to find out if I’m single or not. But I play along anyway.

“Nope, I don’t have one sadly.” I pout a little to add to the effect. A small shiver passes through me as a gust of wind appears out of nowhere. My slightly damp hair doesn’t appreciate this. 

Stuart begins to take his button-up off so he’s left with his shirt and drapes it over my shoulders. I shyly smile at him, slowly dying inside. The flannel smells really nice, but also kind of like alcohol. I don’t mind though. It’s providing warmth.

I bite my lip in contemplation, before shuffling closer to him and setting my head on his shoulder. My heart’s strangely calm, like it’s content with the action I made. I am too. 

Stuart wraps his arm around my shoulders and rests his head on top of mine. I smile contently, like my soul has finally reached the rest it’s been looking for. Like everything in my life has fallen into place finally.

“Exchangeagram moment!” Billy yells out before running up to us, snapping a quick picture of us 3 and then running off again like a little child. The two of us look at each other and laugh at Billy and his idea of ‘exchangeagram”. He’s like a little kid on Christmas. I hate to break it to him, but ‘echangeagram’ will never exist.

Stuart furrows his brows for a second before reaching out and moving some hair behind my ear, and then takes a hold of my chin. He leans over to place a small kiss on my lips. At the exact moment our lips touch, a surge of happiness flows through me. I smile into the kiss and pull him a little closer by his shirt. His lips feel so soft against mine, and they taste like alcohol and mints. It’s a strange combination but I like it. I have to say, never in my dreams did I think that this would actually happen.

We pull apart and I laugh a little at how surreal that felt. It’s like all of my feelings since day 1 have surfaced and are out in the open now. Shit, they are.

“Is it bad that since the moment you took my beanie, I wanted this to happen?” He laughs a little, pulling me into the previous position we were in. A smile comes to my face when he says that. That’s what I wanted to hear.

I look up at him, place a small kiss on his cheeks and shake my head ‘no’. No, that is the opposite of a problem. 

Billy, Nick and Neha all cheer and clap their hands at us. I enjoy it. I enjoy their company, their words of encouragement, but most of all I enjoy the feeling of Stuart’s lips on mine.

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