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#real life sucks
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May have to take some time away but I queued some posts. I know only a few of y’all are gonna see this but I just wanted to let you know I didn’t disappear. ✌️🩷
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dionte-goethe · 6 months
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I'm so late for Jiang Cheng's birthday, but my tablet pen charger broke so yeah. I just wanted to draw allcheng. Or all-jiujiu-thieves?
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st0rmyskies · 7 months
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Hey friends,
Remember when I had those air conditioning issues and had to take on some commissions to afford it? I also decided at that time that a job change was in order. I've moved on to a new hospital where I am incredibly happy. However, with a longer day and a much longer commute, real life is definitely cutting in to my hobby time.
If you've reached out to me with a question or a discord message that's gone unanswered, my apologies. I'm trying to devote what little free time I do have mostly to writing in order to get through commissions and to work on HSH.
I'm still here, I still love hearing from everyone, I just don't have the time right now to play like I used to.
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jellfishjellfish · 1 month
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Next chapter later today, our car broke down so I’ve spent the weekend frantically selling any and all items I can 🙃
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misskattylashes · 4 months
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When you're supposed to be working but you would much prefer to be writing your 18th century gay pirate fic....
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hereliesbitches--me · 7 months
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Ngl some days I wanna delete this blog and start fresh. Other times I think maybe I'll archive. But I do want to have a fresh face because I think a lot of the people I used to know aren't here anymore
Its depressing. The stress of life has sapped my motivation to do anything at all, but it circles my mind all day
I hope yall are doing better than I am
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angie-j-kay · 10 months
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Updates, and why I've been kinda silent lately.
Warning, this is going to have a bit of reality in it and I apologize. I do hope there won't be too much negativity.
Okay, so I've mentioned before that I'm a professional English teacher. Specifically, I teach English as a Second Language. Currently, my husband and I teach in Spain, where we're kinda hoping to become citizens someday. I've been mostly silent because I work a lot, between this novel and my day job.
Sadly, the school that I work at... well, the short version is that this place sucks, but as a foreigner in Spain I'm essentially unemployable. So I'm going to re-open an old Etsy shop I used to have. I'm not a fan of Etsy, and will migrate away asap, but it's a start.
I've got three months between now and the beginning of the next school year to prepare. There will probably be a bit of restructuring on here, though I'm not sure what it will be yet.
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Therapy Fit for a God Chapter 17
Therapy Fit for a God Chapter 16
Loki/OFC Rated E: Trigger Warnings: Smut, Sex, Oral Sex, Angst, talk of suicide, therapy, unhealthy family dynamics, mention of torture and mind control, touch starved, drinking
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16
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Loki’s plans to conquer and rule Midgard have come to a disastrous end. After being captured by the Avengers, he is being held on Earth. Odin has refused to interfere, and the outlook for the God of Mischief appear bleak. His only hope may lie in one mortal woman, a Psychiatric expert brought in to interrogate him.
Dr. Caroline Thorpe is intrigued by Loki and thinks that more lies beneath his actions than is commonly known. Can she find out the truth before he is shipped off to die for crimes against the Earth? And can Loki bring himself to care?
@yespolkadotkitty @just-the-hiddles @hopelessromanticspoonie @wine-and-whines @arch-venus25 @caffiend-queen @devilish–doll @enchantedbyhiddles @hiddlesholic @i-do-not-fangirl-i-fanwoman @kellatron55 @ladyoftheteaandblood @latent-thoughts @yespolkadotkitty@maryxglz @myoxisbroken @nuggsmum @nildespirandum @pedeka @redfoxwritesstuff @sinfully-lustful-darling @vodka-and-some-sass @wrathkitty @kingtwhiddleston @wolfsmom1 @poetic-fiasco @shiningloki @dangertoozmanykids101 @bookworm-christina @amwolowicz @delightfulheartdream @frostbitten-written @what-a-flammable-heart @tom-hlover @nonsensicalobsessions @myraiswack @loki-yoursaviourishere @ghostypau @ms-cellanies @colorfulfreakstudentpizza @mareebird @colorfulfreakstudentpizza  @szycha22 @chokemedaddyloki @queenofallhobos @just-the-hiddles-reads  @alwida10  @justjoanne242 @chantsdemarins @lovelysizzlingbluebird @lokiprompts @evieplease​
"Loki, stop pacing. I am sure that Dr. Caroline is going to be just fine."
Thor's voice was grating in its earnestness, and it was all Loki could do not to slam his knee into his brother's sternum. Of course, with all the breakfast pastries his brother had been wolfing down, 0that would have no doubt resulted in a disgusting mess, adding to the list of irritations rapidly mounting.
At least Stark had the decency to look miserable. Slumped in a chair with the largest mug Loki possessed filled with coffee, the mortal glowered behind a pair of dark glasses. Every noise, however large, seemed to send waves of discomfort through his entire body. Normally, Loki would have delighted in tormenting him further, banging chairs, flickering the lights, and whatnot, but at the moment he had more important concerns. Besides, Thor's normal behavior was loud enough to cause the man to wince every few moments.
"What is taking her so long," he asked for the umpteenth time.
Now that the time had come for them to attempt this foolhardy plot, Loki wanted to get on with it, to have it over and done with. Every moment delayed was another moment he was in agony thinking of the peril his precious Caroline would be placing herself in. His brain continued to conjure up one fate after another that were each alone enough to make him seethe with preemptive venom.
"If there's one thing I've learned in my life...," Tony grumbled into his coffee, "well, actually, it's don't fuck around with Bruce Banner when he's looking green. Thanks for that, by the way, throw rug. Better you than me. But, only slightly behind that is never rush a lady. No good ever comes of it. Besides, I need a few minutes more before I'm flight ready."
"I don't give a damn what you need," Loki spat, glaring at the miserable sot.
It was not as though Loki himself had gotten any sleep. After a brief, blissful doze in his beloved's arms, he had awoken to the realization of what he had agreed to. He knew that Caroline was a strong, independent woman. He would not have wanted her any other way. In this case however, he cursed that streak of stubbornness that normally pared so well with his own.
For an hour or so he had occupied himself thinking up ways he might wriggle out of allowing her to come on the mission. The idea of simply following through on what Stark obviously expected of him and whisking her away via the Tesseract was supremely tempting. He could do it while she slept, and by the time she awoke they would be in a completely different galaxy. The only problem was he was sure she would never trust him again. The thought of her eyes, cold with contempt and devoid of affection was chilling to his very soul. No, she would give him no peace until the scepter with its damned stone was off of her world and no longer a threat to it.
He could go himself and leave her behind. Mentally he rifled through all of the ways that he could keep her here, safe in his cottage on the other side of the world. Magically induced sleep, ropes, sealing the doors so that she could not escape, all of these were mentally examined out and discarded. The idea that something might happen to the cottage while she was trapped inside due to him was worse than any other scenario he could fathom. Even if he just slipped out while she still slumbered it would not do. She was still wanted by SHIELD, and he would not leave her alone on the run from a powerful enemy.
No, there was nothing for it but to let her come along and hope that he could find some way to keep her safe. Whatever it took, whoever and whatever he had to sacrifice, Loki was determined that not a hair on Caroline's lovely head would be harmed.
"Okay, I think I'm ready."
The voice was the same, but as Loki turned to look at his love a different form greeted him. Her hair was a reddish blonde, longer than she wore her own, and pulled back into a loose braid. She stood a good half foot taller, and her delightful curves had been stretched out to a more statuesque physique, now clothed in the SHIELD uniform. Her face was slightly altered as well: higher cheekbones, a wider mouth. Loki had done the illusion himself of course, but it was still a shock to hear the voice he loved so well coming out of a different body.
"I am glad to see you didn't decide to go with a feline," Thor nodded, causing Loki's eyes to roll back in his head. "You look lovely, Dr. Caroline. Not that you didn't before. But this is nice too. In fact, now that I look at you, you look quite a bit like our mother!"
"Boy is that a lot to unpack this early in the morning," Stark practically spit out his coffee. "I can see why you like this one, Doc. He'll keep you in business for decades."
"I look forward to meeting her," Caroline ignored Tony's jibe, instead smiling at Thor and bringing a completely irrational blush to Loki's cheeks with her comment. "I think I'm used to this new look enough that I won't jump every time I catch my reflection in the mirror."
"Are you sure?" he asked. Despite his previous wish to get on with things, he was once again overcome with reluctance. "We can delay if you prefer. A day, even longer if need be."
"No, let's do it now."
"Yeah, you can defile fake mommy once we secure the Earth, Oedipus. Let's get this over with."
Loki glared at Stark, wishing that he had time to find a window high enough to toss him out of. The man must have a death wish of his own with the way he so continually goaded Loki. Caroline seemed to collect broken warriors the way other women collected jewelry. The thought made Loki's eyes narrow in irritation. He didn't like the idea of being one of many. When they were through with their fool's errand, he would make sure he did everything he could see that he remained her one and only. Oh, she could treat other patients, but perhaps not ones with reputations like the billionaire hero possessed.
"Alright," he began, trying to settle the anxiety thrumming inside him. "We all know the plan. Let's do this as quickly as possible so that Caroline and I can get on with our lives."
"Assuming we decide to let you go," Tony interrupted.
"Assuming I give you a choice," Loki countered. "I dropped you from too low a height last time. Perhaps over your Grand Canyon would work better."
"Easier there, tiger," Tony said with a smirk. "Yes, we know the plan. I just called the jet; it should be here within the moment. Maybe you ought to change yourself. Unless there's some sort of Norse alt rock fest in the area, you are sure to stand out looking like that."
"You do cut quite a striking figure, Loki," Caroline smiled up at him through different eyes. "Not that I'm complaining, but it would be impossible not to notice you."
"Right," he sighed.
With a slight shimmer his black hair was replaced with the curly golden blond and skin was once more tanned and be-freckled. It was not as drastic a transformation as he had made for Caroline, but then he was not as concerned about his safety if discovered.
"That is a handy trick. Don't suppose you could teach me that on the plane?" Stark asked, staring at him as though trying to see the mechanism that had made the change.
"Don't bother, friend Stark," Thor slapped the small man on the back, making him groan. "Loki is famously secretive about his spells."
"I don't recall you ever bothering to ask," Loki said, voice clipped.
"Oh, of course I didn't," Thor laughed. "Why would I want to learn magic when I was already able to fight. I was thinking of Fandral in those early days, before he perfected his skill with a blade. He was desperate enough to think perhaps your tricks would at least give him some sort of usefulness, even if he couldn't do battle."
Loki's entire body tensed at the careless mockery in his brother's voice, years of resentment suddenly filling him. A combination of shame and rage formed in his chest, dying to be given vent in some sort of destructive act or cutting remark.
"Interesting," Caroline commented in a light voice. "I would have thought the opposite. After all, anyone can swing a sword, or a hammer, but how many people do you know can change their entire appearance with a thought? But then, I guess I've always appreciated the extraordinary. I'm sure the ordinary is just fine as well, and many people actually don't mind it."
"Okay, retract your claws Doc. Seems you put a little bit of cat in there after all, Loks," Stark laughed.
"I meant no disrespect," Thor looked confused.
A whirring noise sounded from the front of the cabin and Loki released the tension he had been holding.
"Ah, saved by the jet. All aboard, people. Stark Airlines is waiting for you."
***
It was all fine as long as she kept her eyes straight ahead. When she simply looked where she was going, Caroline could walk naturally, head up, no problems. It was only when she glanced down that the difficulties began. It was rather like when one forgot the number of steps walking down the stairs and didn't realize one had reached the bottom. Caroline's physical legs were inches shorter than the image that currently strut down the hall of SHEILD, so it seemed to her eyes that it should take much less time to reach the floor. Or something.
"Are you sure you don't wish I was taller?" she asked Loki where he strut beside her.
Not all the glamour spells in the world could hide the deadly swagger that his hips and shoulders made as he walked heel toe, heel toe down the corridor. The fact that his walk alone was enough to make her pulse beat faster was ridiculous, and yet there it was.
Her question was mostly a way to distract herself. She knew that, despite all logic, Loki was attracted to her. He had made that clear enough over the past forty-eight hours. Still, she would not have been human if she didn't have some insecurities. The most stunningly beautiful creature in existence had chosen to court her (to use the word he had murmured to her the night before as they drifted to sleep). It was beyond anything she had ever dreamed of.
"Don't be absurd," he answered with scowl. "You are perfect just the way you are. Why? Are you wishing that I were fair haired? Or perhaps marked by the sun the way your mortal men can be?"
"Loki, you are absolutely perfect the way you are," she laughed. "Besides, I would want you regardless of skin color or hair style."
"I might hold you to that," Loki's voice held the self mockery that she loathed, but less so than it might have just days before.
"Please do, my prince."
"Ixnay on the Oki-stay!" Tony said with a glare. "Besides, my system's still a bit too fragile for all this intergalactic love island."
So far their plan had gone exactly as planned. They had landed Tony's futuristic jet on the SHIELD compound with barely a raised eyebrow. A wave of the billionaire's hand had been enough to dissipate questions about the two new recruits he had brought with him. Caroline, dressed in the standard SHIELD uniform, had been introduced as Agent Jocasta. Loki, insistently in a very expensive looking suit, was Dr. Rex. She just hoped Tony's cleverness was not the undoing of them all.
Once inside, Thor had been dispatched to find Fury and Pierce and keep them occupied while the other three went after the scepter. Unspoken between them was the knowledge that while the blond Asgardian meant well, he was not the most agile when it came to dissembling. Having him far away if people began to question their identities seemed wise.
Flanking Stark they made their way down the familiar halls until they neared the room where the scepter had been last seen. It was strange to Caroline, but the base felt similar in a way to her knew appearance. It was still the same at the core, but her perception of it was completely changed. The industrious workers rushing to and fro were no longer agents for good, but potential dangers who might see through their charade. Oh, she had always been aware that one or two bad apples lurked in the barrel, but now she glanced with suspicion at everyone. If a large enough contingent could be willing and ready to kill a prisoner without granting him due process and a fair hearing, what else might the men and women working here be capable of?
All too quickly they reached the doorway. By collective agreement they stopped just outside. Caroline rose up and down on her toes a few times, as though stretching could help in this situation. Loki looked quickly down the hall in each direction before pulling her into a tight embrace. For a moment she forgot everything as he kissed her sensless.
"Okay, Romeo, let her up for air. She's just going into the next room, not onto a battle field."
"The object in the next room is more powerful than any army," Loki said, still holding her but surrendering her lips. "Darling, listen to me. If you feel any hesitation, any fear, get out of there instantly. There is no shame in not being a match for one of the founding powers of the universe. Even I was brought down by it eventually."
"It is such an odd experience not being the biggest egotist in the room. I don't think I like it," Tony quipped. "Mr. Fantastic is right for once though. If anything feel janky, you cut and run. We will find another way to get the spear. Now, I'm gonna run down to my lab and grab my case. Here's my ID. I'll be back almost before you miss me."
With that, he was off at a trot down the hall, leaving Caroline and Loki alone in front of the plain metal door.
"You don't have to do this," Loki tried one last time to convince her. "I can just as easily go in."
"And if you come out under its sway, how on Earth or any other planet for that matter, could I stop you?" she asked. "I am counting on you to stop me and make me drop the thing into Tony's scepter dampening suitcase."
"Alright."
"Here we go."
"I love you."
Caroline felt tears well in her eyes and willed them away.
"I love you," she answered.
She opened the door and closed it quickly behind her, wanting to keep Loki from coming in after her. She had the sequence from Tony to unlock the cradle the scepter lay in. By the time she had released it, he would be back with the case.
As she stepped towards the shiny metal weapon, she felt a tingling sensation almost like a caress run over her skin. Caroline stopped for a moment took a deep breath. She knew what this was. She could ignore it. Not looking at the glowing blue gem that pulsed softly at the head of the scepter, she entered the pass code into the pad controlling the cradle. One nob slid down to the bottom, a second up to the top, and a dial spun two thirds of the way around. With each move she made, the tingling grew stronger, eager almost anticipatory.
At last, the gold light surrounding the scepter died, and the sensation dug like needles into her skin. Caroline's breathing was coming fast and shallow as her hands reach, trembling, for the smooth, deadly weapon. As her fingers wrapped around the cold metal it was as though every cell in her body sprang to life and she all but lifted off the ground.
"Oh yessss," she felt more than heard the voice in her mind. "We are going to have so much fun together."
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kanej-is-superior · 2 months
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my toxic trait is loving red flags in fictional characters. like if any guy has the audacity to tell me what to do, his douchey ass is getting left, but my favourite fictional man does it and of couse i'll do it sweetie pie 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
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aphoestrope · 7 months
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Fictober '23 - Day 4
prompt: #4 "Do you even know what this means?" original fiction: tales of the realm - medieval fantasy!AU rating: teen and up audiences (may not be appropriate for audiences under 13) warnings: none
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Raegys Sylvar returned from his patrol with the uncanny tiefling a little bit after the moon disappeared behind the thick clouds. The night was getting colder, there wasn't supposed to be anyone hanging around the undying fireplace at this time. He was proven wrong the moment his eyes caught the sight of the red-haired princess sitting on one of the logs. Hugging the thick rug around her own body was the person he had been throwing his life out for—the person who would one day stand victorious after the treachery.
The person who has had his heart since day one.
The young knight took a seat next to her, the sword on his hip was moved to his back. The younger woman immediately turned to look at him, eyes widened slightly before looking back towards the burning fire.
“You should get some rest.” He told her matter-of-factly. “You’ve been up since dusk. Have you eaten anything today?”
Syllavana Loramaer shook her head lightly, her eyes darted to the bowl of stew just laying there forgotten by her side. She let out a small sigh, her hand rummaging through the pocket of her pants for the letter she received in the afternoon. No one knew of the existence of this letter but herself—not yet, not until she showed it to him.
She handed the letter to him without saying anything else. Raegys took the letter hesitantly, his eyes not leaving hers’.
Confusion was plastered all over his expression. “What’s this?” He asked while opening the folded piece of parchment.
“It’s from Strategos Vasselieu.” She murmured quietly.
It took some time before the man next to her replied. “Shit.” He muttered, returning the letter back to her. “Do you even know what this means?” “I know.” The tone of her voice was low—too low for someone of her stature. “This means our time just got cut off much shorter.”
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how am i supposed to go out in the real world if you keep posting all of this amazing (and extremely addictive) content 😭
idk but i have to go to work tomorrow and i would just rather not. upload my brain now, elon musk. im ready to shed this mortal coil and ill just pump out oddly specific COD smut for the rest of my online robot life.
lol but thank you for your comment! im glad to hear youre liking it. more to come!! that's for sure.
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bomberqueen17 · 2 years
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getaway
so it was my 20th anniversary with Dude this past weekend, so I got back from the farm on Saturday and on Sunday we drove to the Finger Lakes and stayed two nights in this.... well it was an inn, and it was just this side of bonkers, and it’s a long story but we definitely admired their ability to walk that fine line of wow this is weird and come up on the but i like it side instead of i gotta get outta here.
Anyway it was really lovely and we had a lovely time and the most important thing was the company, of course, yadda yadda, but I got home on Tuesday night into the worst case of Sunday Scaries I’ve had in a while, and I am just. So full of dread and despair today folks, so full of it.
cut for whining, mostly job-search-related but also existential!
Nothing I do is worth money, no job I’ve ever had has actually wanted me there except as a warm body to grudgingly pay the least amount they could get away with. I have no marketable skills. I can write novels, but not on demand. And really, that’s the problem-- up to 80% of my mind at any given time is taken up with fake things, imaginary worlds and situations, and I can’t focus anyway but even if I could, I wouldn’t focus on the real world, because the real world sucks, and I’m wildly productive at real-world things but not in ways that anyone ever in the history of ever has wanted to pay me for. i’ve done a lot of really skilled volunteer jobs but they are all things nobody is going to pay actual money for.
The only thing I want to do, the only thing I have ever wanted to do, the only thing I have ever consistently done, is write, and the way our economy and culture and publishing system works, that is something I can never be paid money for. I will never earn a living, and I will never even earn more than expenses unless I devote attention I simply don’t possess to marketing and other things, which I cannot do and have no skills in. So that’s out.
But I should be honest: all I’m doing is trying to earn enough paychecks in my life that someone will someday say “Okay you can stop” and let me go write for a while, and that’s not going to happen, so.
Yeah I also keep hoping they’ll find money to pay me with at the farm but that keeps not happening. I needed to find myself a job to do that would provide a revenue stream for them to pay me from, but when I tried to be the flowers person they refused to hire me for that one and hired someone who flaked out instead and this year’s plan for that is apparently none of my business, and now i was trying to be the person doing commercial kitchen stuff but they’re already talking about the people they want to hire for that and i’m not any of those either, and I guess I gotta put on my big girl panties and ask directly but I did that for flowers and the rejection really stung and so I’m not looking forward to that. but it’s better than wishing, i suppose.
I had always idly thought if I finished any of my original novels ever I could put those somewhere and sell them but well first I’d have to find the time, and second, watching joy demorra’s (bibliosphere) posts about how little money Amazon actually gives to her is so demoralizing. I’ll only do that if I don’t actually need the money, jesus christ. meanwhile i’d rather sate my encompassing addiction with fanfic because then i can at least be realistic that it doesn’t pay money. Again, better than wishing.
But I’m just old and tired, and all the frustrations of this job I’ve spent twelve years at being grudgingly paid the least they can get away with, with my poorly-defined job description it’s a nightmare to navigate on the daily, are just piling up extra, and I am so tired of the only things I enjoy and am supported in doing in this world are things that do not actually contribute to my actually having food and shelter. It’s not that I’m trying to do what I love or whatever, I know that’s a fake idea, I’m just so tired that there are so many calls for me to work hard in ways I love, and those have to come out of my own reserves, I pay to do them, and then I have to poorly do a terrible job at a job that dislikes me in order to get any money, to afford to be able to do the things I love that cost money to do, and it’s just frustrating because the things I love are also hard work and I don’t know how to solve that. I’m not even explaining it well! I’m just very tired.
It is all irredeemable whining but when I think too hard about this it cuts into my ability to write; I was making progress FINALLY on the next bit of Fit For Pearls until I got the crushing wave of nothing-I-do-is-valued-by-society ennui, which is no fair. If I’m so thoroughly worthless I should at least be able to write some lesbian porn about it, but I was denied.
Honestly that’s the only thing I need, is enthusiasm for that; I gotta solve my actual real world problems on my own. but i would super not mind a reminder that I’ve come far too far with Ciri and Lu to only come this far.
Though if anyone’s got any good leads on part-time remote work I could to to make ends meet that’d be pretty keen.
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josefavomjaaga · 2 years
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Just a quick hi...
... and an apology long overdue for my sudden disppearance, to everyone who may have missed me. I’m fine and I have definitely NOT lost interest in the napoleonic era - to the contrary, as I’ve just had a very welcome occasion to read up on the Prussian and Polish campaign - or the marshalate. I’m just having some family trouble to sort out.
Love and hugs to everybody!
Josefa/Petra
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misskattylashes · 3 months
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I sadly cannot now see Miles at the Electric Ballroom on 9th February. I have 2x tickets to sell. If you're interested please DM me
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redhairedgirl95 · 10 months
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Hi guysssss
I’m sorry if I’m inactive, but my PMS is killing me, my eyes hurt without a specific reason, I’ve got a show tomorrow, gotta be back in school Wednesday and Thursday for exams, anxiety is reaching the next level and …
I’m just tired 🫠
I promise I’ll be back ASAP
In the meantime, did you read EM2 chapter 17? Did you like it? Comments? Impressions? I’m waiting for you in my asks 💙
Love you all 🩷
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wordusagedaily · 11 months
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hiatus
we'll be back with more englishy messages soon!
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