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#im having a not great time right now

broodingheroine · 2 months

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tmagp 8 thoughts

ooo running on empty. interesting.

oh fuck right into it

tutoring?????

that's an intensive grading rubric jesus

brutalism and LIMINAL SPACE????

feeling a type of way abt this being abt architecture. we've been through this.

I'm actually impressed by the quality of this essay so far

it's lowkey giving lonely vibes and of COURSE norris is reading this one

I don't like the repeated use of hunger in regards to architecture

a tower. hm.

less and less people. every night. okay.

hunger again. do not like.

"strangeness"

okay whatever you do, do not eat the food

okay this is SO lonely. like yes ik don't apply smirkes 14 to tmagp but it's for my own brain. I'm not making statements of fact abt tmagp.

CANNIBALISM????

it's giving that ep of tma where the kid got trapped in an alternate abandoned amusement park with all the starving ppl

NO ONE NOTICED HE WAS MISSING???

oh alice that is actually really annoying. fill the kettle.

WE BOTH KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?? ALICE WHAT DO YOU KNOW

ooooo colins on leave. probably good for him but I'm sad.

SOURDOUGH MENTION❗️❗️❗️

GERRYYYYYYYY

GERRYYYYYYYYYYY

I'm gonna fucking cry oh my god oh my god

GERTRUDE??????????? WHAT IN THE EVERLIVING FUCK

barely remembers any of it............

BOOKS MENTION. OH MY GOD.

what if I died. actually what if I died.

YOUR MYSTERY?

time travels. other dimensions. teleportation.

PODCAST? WTG??????

GEORGIE

was there a glitch in the audio when she said georgies name or am I crazy

okay so fuck.

alice acts super different without an audience. she knows smth else is going on but she deliberately ignores it so she doesn't get caught up in it.

I was expecting a gerry cameo at some point so as excited as I was I wasn't Surpised.

BUT GERTRUDE? that threw me for a loop.

we're slowly collecting tma cast members. idk how to feel about this.

I'm deeply worried abt colin.

I wanna know what the painting was and why celia liked it so much. was there something about camden in tma that im forgetting? he called it "camden epiphany"

unless things are VASTLY different in tmagp universe, obviously gertrude is lying about gerry being her grandson. why though. when they traveled together in tma the common ruse they used was that she was his mother but why is there a need for a ruse here?

I desperately need to know what happened to mary and eric too.

"good luck hunting elsewhere" gertrude why did you use that word. why hunting. what do you know.

alright I think that's everything. I am absolutely catatonic rn. so many things.

this was a lot.

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #the magnus protocol spoilers #tmagp 8 #tmagp 8 spoilers #im having a not great time right now

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kittenninja14 · 27 days

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Just some Wobbly Hearts Kai doodles bc i felt like it lolll

i shared this on discord but decided to share this on tumblr as well lol

Depressed/sad/traumatized Kai is now my drawing hyper-fixation, lolll

ANyways yall go check out @ninja-knox-ur-sox-off's Wobbly Hearts AU!!! It's absolutely A-MEOW-ZINGGG!!!!

besides... there is a lot of Kai angst as well loll. But dw its all worth it... i think.... KNOX!!!! IS THE TRAUMA WORTH IT!??!?!?! U BETTER HAVE NOT MADE ME SUFFER FOR NO REASONN!!!!! KNOXXX--

*ahem*... anyways... i am trusting on the fact taht one of the tags in this fic is #Angst With a Happy Ending

this tag is the only thing that keeps me from breaking down... the small bit of light in this dark tunnel of angstttt LOLLLLL

but like fr... go and check out this AU its really great lol!!

https://kittenninja14.tumblr.com/post/731916269075480576/hey-yall-i-just-found-this-incredible-video-and

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darcyolsson · 8 months

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"no one actually cares about the spotify links you post" wrong. i do. i mean it when i say i listen to at least half of the songs people put on my dash. a solid amount of my music i find through random hyperlinks or, preferably, a dramatic text post that uses smalltext.io liberally. i will even google randomly posted lyrics to find out which song it's from and then listen to it attentively and put it in a playlist if i like it. dont know whose god complex this is going to feed but i need to put this out there

#i ONLY do this on tumblr though youre the only people i trust have good music taste #and you do! there's so many songs i've found on here which i love #i listen to your mp3 your spotify links and your playlists and im having a great time! bitch!#found mitski through that nobody meme found ethel cain through a post saying 'listen to crush by ethel cain right now' and i did #maisie peters was obviously tay and alex's doing... sam's playlists are responsible for at least 30% of the songs i listen to #dance fever my fav album of all time i first listened to bc of a text post that did in fact use small text generator #so much beauty in the world keep sharing it with each other. <3 #personal

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ganondoodle · 11 months

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as cool as their design is im really starting to dislike the sonau in general, aside from their stuff suddendly being everywhere and everything being about them and how cool(tm) they are now with the mystery stone turning people into dragons and the similarities between the sonau and the three dragons (naydra, eldra, farodra) its actually not an impossibility that they used to be sonaus as alot of people have been theorizing about ..but ...... idk that would very much ruin their otherwordly yet ethereal mystery to me

i probably sound like some hater whos trying to find something more to dislike about totk all the time but i promise im not!!

the three dragons being some unexplained mystery, beings that are there yet few can see them, timeless, nigh untouchable, they dont act on anything, they dont talk, something about them has always made me look at them in awe; if it turned out they were just yet another cool(tm) sonau guy that ate a stone ... :/

not a fan of that one lads, but dont worry, i will keep my thoughts to myself from now on, i dont want to ruin other peoples fun nor seem like i just hate everything ... the three dragons are just really important to me so i had to say something

#ganondoodles talks #tloz #totk #totk spoilers #totk spoiler #besides i have leanred that i tend to have the unpopular opinions and frankly im tired of the hate directed at me #if you disagree thats fine but please dont spam me with why you think its cool actually #bc it just feels like yet another argument starting as to why im wrong and need to be talked down to and also suck actually #sorry its been all over my timeline on twitter so i just had to throw my dumbass opinion out there again #and it was a few times more than id like in a row where my random thought posts where torn apart by arguing people needing to prove im wron #the dragons where something i just absolutely loved in botw #they hold a special place in my heart and i dont like the thought of them too being just yet another sonau thing #i feel more secure posting my thoughts here than on twitter #but still i dont want to sound overly negative so i will hold back from now on #unless im exhausted and overly tired and not feeling that great physically like right now i guess lol #ill just have to grit my teeth and try to ignore everything i dont like but everyone else loves like always #anyway i need some sleep #ill be fine after that i think #and then try to resume work on destiny and a commission i havent had the energy to get to

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princessdarth-vader · 24 days

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the fact that riz worked so hard to keep straight A+ grades all year only in the matter of like, a week to complete two nigh impossible tasks to, essentially, ensure all that work didn't matter and ace his grades anyway would legitimately keep me up at night at his age. I hope he gets like, a fucking medal or something. or, yknow, more cash from the school. he deserves it

#fhjy spoilers #fhjy #like im so serious right now id lose my mind #the whole party deserve an award for putting all that work into academics and having it ultimately not matter anyway #but riz found the rogue teacher AND passed the last stand in the space of like a week and thats great and awesome for him but #i think id explode realising i spent all that time working for nothing basically #i gen thought murph was gonna make a joke about “riz takes another stress token” during aguefort's speech bc. i would #agueforts adventuring academy owes this boy therapy money i think

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enhanced-operatives-division · 1 month

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Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble

I will not be brief, all under the cut

To clear some things right off the bat:

No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.

Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality

The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.

This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.

Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:

Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.

All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.

Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).

And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.

At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.

I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.

Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.

This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.

It shifts something between them.

From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.

As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.

Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.

Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.

I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.

I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.

I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.

As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.

I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.

Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great

#ty right-agent for explicitly telling me that this would be welcomed you a real one #i had a massive babble to my friend abt what if they all feed me to the hounds for speaking #and he said “girl that fandom is like 12 people big they need you to speak” and yeah that also helped #i have a hard time talking if I'm not asked/prompted to that's why i adding tags is great for me. that and i like the format #anyways.#THESE TWO.............dear lord can you tell I have been unwell abt them forever..#this is propeganda (/j) for them. btw. please you have to understand the potential here. it's so good.#it's slowburn <- my (probably) demiromantic ass cannot handle romance without a build up and this set up is perfect (it will never happen)#also i find it easier to write ANYTHING between these two from Juniper's perspective because i find it easier to get into his head #idk reggie is like the gay version of the: what is he thinking of? i could take a bear in a fight. audio ive heard.#whereas with juniper i have him trapped under a microscope #im going to tag this now so i can use the remaining tags to RANT #ieytd #john juniper #reginald crane #junicrane #starstruck #i expect you to die #<- being BRAVE!!!#when I get really excited i start getting like this internal shaking feeling and uh. yeah this rant started that #the worst part abt that is it also triggers my tourettes so like. double whammy. excited about blorbos? jail :(#but. yeah I uh. yeah. sorry this IS so long..I did warn but . AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHAUUUUUUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH #also i did this rant in 2 parts. last night and this morning so yeah uh. yeah.#god im so messed up about these two #make me a boat by the family crest came on while wroting this and while it's mainly a roxanix song to me......AUUUUUG.....#i struggle to find music for these sillies because they have such a specific vibe to me amd I've not quite managed to find something which -#- genuinely feels correct for them and it drives me up the WALL #GOD NIGHT SHIFT JUST CAME OF SHUFFL.....all my ieytd songs are coming out to drive me up the wall.......#FINISHED I've been adding tags as I've gone alonga #thank you for reading hope you enoyed and if you didn't im sorry

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songofsaraneth · 1 year

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i think if there has to be a jury of ‘music industry’ people who base all their votes on vocal quality. that we also deserve a second jury that awards points based on PIZAZZ. like half of eurovision to me is the performance! the emotion! the CAMP! and yet every year all the boringsest ballads get shoved to the top while the popular vote struggles to counteract the jury negligence.

#eurovision #eurovision 2023 #i thought sweden was a great singer and her song was fine #but it didnt have the energy or the sparkle or the connection i look for in a winning esc performance cmon #the high of italy and then ukraine winning i think gave me too much hope #the jury nonsense just sucked it all right back in this year #i used to be used to the good ones losing but this time i had HOPE so now im extra bitter

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thewhizzyhead · 4 months

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you know my dudes, with mean girls the musical being a show i willingly go to the trenches for in defending how much I find it genuinely fun even with the objective acknowledgment of its many many flaws, I am genuinely surprised that people,,,are actually fucking liking the movie adaptation of this show,,,and for me that's great cause now I don't have to go through all out war in defense of this silly flawed show and its talented cast members woo a break!

#like it's rotten tomatoes score...is actually rising??? like its at 79% the last time i checked #which is great! fuck yes i dont have to make myself look stupid in defending the cast members stuck in a shitshow #because now it doesnt look like they are in a shitshow! this is amazing fucking news!#nO REALLY I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE THE CAST EVEN THE ONES IM NOT THAT FAMILIAR WITH LIKE BEBE WOODS AND AVANTIKA!#sO IM GLAD THAT THIS ISNT A SHIT SHOW! also many people are saying that renee and aulii are scene stealers #aND THOSE ARE MY TWO GIRLS RIGHT THERE WOOOOOO GET THOSE DAMN FLOWERS!#anyways where the fuck in the philippines is this damn movie showing #mean girls #mean girls the musical #mean girls musical movie

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