#im curious if my notes on my thought process are interesting to anyone else

[marcmorrigan]

finally delivering on the princess tutu headshots i promised... love these dysfunctional teens 🩰💖💕

LOTS of notes about headcanons/design choices under the cut! like. a lot. dont say i didnt warn you

starting with my specialest guy fakir:

i had a suuuper clear vision for fakir, and i couldnt be happier with how he turned out, he looks exactly how i imagine him! trying to translate his Bird-Shaped Hair into my style gave me SERIOUS homestuck flashbacks. my affinity for knights with Problems knows no bounds...

adding the hyperpigmentation around his eyes and his acne scars is what really solidified this for me-- i put those in and was like oh!!! there you are!!! my boy!!! and you can tell because i gave him acne scars + thick eyebrows that he IS my boy... there are very clear trends among my headcanons for my faves lol. big noses, thick eyebrows, skin imperfections, heavy eyebags, long dark hair... and fakir truly has it all 😤 he is so Ideal Character Design to me

i think fakir is actually pretty self-conscious about his appearance tho! we see characters like pike and lilie say hes handsome to ahiru, but i dont know how often he actually hears that? and im sure its hard not to compare himself to mytho, who is straight out of a fairy tale; being a regular teenager dealing with regular teen body stuff is hard enough without your roommate being a magically beautiful eternally youthful storybook hero. i think he probably internalises more that people see him as scary and angry, and that the girls who do have crushes on him always frame it in contrast to mytho, who is Good and Kind and Handsome, implying (or sometimes outright stating!) that fakir is Bad and Mean and... Well...

fakir is very sensitive but quiet about it, so i think its a very private point of self-consciousness. i think he puts a lot of semi-secret effort into his appearance; canonically he has a lot of very funny and clearly customised clothing, and he chooses to keep his hair long and in a very particular style (i have a whole breakdown in my mind of how he achieves that style and it involves a surprising amount of pins and an unsurprising fuckton of teasing. i think his hair is a little fried from heat damage!), and i think that probably extends to other things, too, like manicuring his eyebrows and doing a lot of very Teenage Skincare that doesnt actually help his acne much lol. i think he probably has a lot of self-injurious habits and BFRBs like skin picking and chewing, mostly at his acne and around his nails (both of which he hates, because he knows he shouldnt but does it anyway). i think if he does it enough that theres noticeable evidence it feels, like, world-ending for him, ESPECIALLY if anyone asks what happened lol. do not perceive him except in the very specific ways and contexts he approves of THANKS

on to the narratives favorite princess, mytho:

again, i had a pretty clear idea of the vibe i wanted mytho to have going into this-- i want him to have, like, extreme prince charming vibes, very Classically Handsome without necessarily being 'conventional.' i thought a lot about 'the happy prince' story while i was working on this, and really wanted him to look like a cross between how the prince statue looks in my head and a porcelain doll. and also a cross between jonny brown and brigitte bardot? lots of very direct influences for him lol. so! lots of gold tones, gemmy eye color, cute little tooth gap, quivering wide-eyed thousand-yard-stare doe eyes and big ol dolly anime lashes, which were the very last thing i added because i was NERVOUS about pulling those off lol. they turned out cute tho! ive only done a handful of pieces for this series and i can already tell princess tutu is gonna make me up my lash drawing game considerably, these kids all look like they blink and cause a hurricane from the gale force wind of their falsies

also wait i lied the very last thing i did was add his freckles/beauty marks because he needed that little extra oomph and those were It. i think he probably has some on his hands/wrists too 💕

i was a little unsure if my idea for his hair would translate with this flat-color approach but im pretty happy with it! its supposed to be afrotextured hair (somewhere between 3b and 4c i think? wide range of potential i knowww but im still kind of hammering out my headcanons okay, this is exploratory lol) thats been rolled and finger-styled into his little feather shapes. i think loose, chunky twists would be another fun way to interpret his hair and twists are one of my fave styles to draw do i might draw him like that at some point too...

i guess fakir is the one who styles his hair for him before mytho gets his heart back? i imagine fakir is pretty meticulous about maintaining mythos health and appearance, even at the worst stages of their relationship. i think itd be hard for fakir to frame the way he treats mytho as For Mythos Sake if he wasnt doing some level of actually beneficial care for him, so being really fastidious about things like mythos diet and sleep hygiene and hair care and such gives fakir an outlet for his 'you just have to do what i tell you' thing that helps him convince himself it really is helping, no really, hes doing this for mythos benefit and he just has to be strict with him because mytho doesnt UNDERSTAND he needs PROTECTING and fakir is the ONLY ONE who can do it so mytho HAS to let him because if he doesnt then why does fakir even EXIST, if he cant manage this then what is he good for, and--

yknow. the usual complexes. and their relationship is so complex!!! but also so simple, but like. in a good way. fakirs behavior is complicated but his motivation regarding mytho is SO straightforward which makes that downward spiral into harm really easy to map out... i wont go much into that in this post since this is about visual/appearance-related headcanons but just. augh. i love this show and i love these characters!!! and i hope its apparent in my work that i do love them so <3

im hoping to do a set of these for the girls next!!! i have some other stuff to finish first but hopefully... Soon... Some Birds...

#princess tutu #fakir #mytho #prince siegfried #my art #i had sooo much fun playing around with style in these... the super strong white highlights + underpainting combo looks SO lovely #i should take this approach more often i almost never do!!! it rules and is fun to do #i was listening to my fakir playlist nonstop for DAYS while working on this and still intermittently since... #it feels like ive been sitting on these for a month but its only been 5 days omg. crazy... good to know tho #anyway i love themmm theyre everything. SO fun to draw i really hope i can do more art of them. i Want To... i have Ideas >:o) #btw is putting notes on my thoughts under a cut like this interesting for yall? its fun for me but idk if yall wanna read all that #i will probably continue regardless bc i love to hear myself talk esp abt my design choices but #im curious if my notes on my thought process are interesting to anyone else #if not oh well! thats what the cut is for 😤 nobodys gotta read it if they dont wanna im doing this for Me #full color

[altraviolet]

hi! :D

someone asked about the energon harp a little while ago & you mentioned the glass harp being an inspiration for it. i suddenly had an Insane Brain Moment where i remembered the existence of an awesome instrument called the glass harmonica (or glass armonica, i believe it's called both!) and while i'm not sure if it fits that "richer" sound you described, since it's not that different sounding from the glass harp (as it's its succesor & the playing principles are the same with the water and glass and everything), i think it's another thing i personally was imagining while reading TEG :)

here is a video about it if you, or anyone else, are curious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVqqNigImtU (it's a bit long but definitely worth a watch or a skim through if you ever have the time - the guy made this one himself i believe, and he talks about its fragility & complexity/the skill needed to play it, as well as some history behind it, and i just think it's such a beautiful instrument that everyone should know about LMAO)

it's also the sort of sound i imagine the resonances of the crystals having, that ethereal, echoing (lol) & almost haunting sound. especially the way the chords played are either beautifully harmonious or off-puttingly dissonant depending on the notes played. at one point i think the cameraman mentions about it being hard to listen to when not played correctly, and that to me is how i imagine the unpure crystals to sound - some harmony with a scratchy, unsatisfying underlayer of discordance mixed in there.

i have this tendency to link everything i possibly can to my interests, so rewatching this video and hearing again about the fragility of it made me have another brain moment and i somehow managed to link that to the way soundwave's crystals shatter. bit more of an abstract link but a link nonetheless xD i suppose the thought process does make sense though

apologies if you are already aware of the glass harmonica and i'm just repeating stuff you're already aware of!! and apologies if this seems random/like an unnecessary ask or something, i wanted to share my thoughts but i don't really have anyone else to talk to about TEG that would get it if that makes sense, so i figured why not share with the author directly ! (and again. i think everyone should know about the glass harmonica it's sick as hell)

actually. while i'm already here typing out an ask i might as well add another thing or two

how do you imagine soundwave's visor transforming away from his face? i can't remember if you go into detail in the fic about it. i think when i first read it i imagined an iron man mask -like transformation with part of it going up over the top of his head? but i'm not sure whether that makes like, any sense with how cybertronians typically transform LOL

and another thing- im autistic and the way you write soundwave sometimes reminds me a LOT of myself, both through the way he expresses himself and also the way hes treated by the lost light crew. there's a scene at/near the beginning of when the crystal club is formed (? i can't remember the exact chapter or point in the plot) where soundwave sees that his great work has the potential to finally be worked on and he's so giddy and elated and laughing and his tentacles are rolling through the air and laserbeak is spinning around and !!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAH idk that reminded me so so much of myself. like that was stimming if i've ever seen it xD

i don't know if you're neurodivergent as well & the way he's written is deliberately allegory for that but it was really fun to relate to him in that way, even if it wasn't intentional. there's a ton of other things soundwave does that to me read as autistic traits & experiences and i think that's awesome

okay that's all :3 i'd also like to say a general thank you for writing the fic (& keeping going for so long!), your writing is truly incredible and brings me so much joy to read and like many others i've started reading mtmte because of it ^_^

hello!

I think I saw this same video, briefly, while researching the glass harp :) the glass harmonica has more of breathy sound to my ear. but you are more than welcome to adopt it in your brain for the sounds of Nautica's harp! the fragility link between the glass harmonica and SW's crystals makes total sense.

>how do you imagine soundwave's visor transforming away from his face?

the story has not addressed this yet. it will, so I won't answer because spoilers

>it was really fun to relate to him in that way, even if it wasn't intentional

other autistic folks have made similar comments! I didn't write him specifically to be autistic. I wrote him to act in a way that I thought was a logical conclusion to the scant canon we got in TFP + the fanon of his emotion-suppressing protocols. but if you feel represented in a positive way than that can only be a good thing, I think!

yay, I'm glad that you've started reading MTMTE! I hope you enjoy the story. it's not perfect, but it is fantastic. it was the first time I saw character arcs in action and understood them to be so. previous to reading MTMTE, I never cared about characters in the books I read. I was more enamored of the world/setting, or the science/magic, etc etc. post-MTMTE I finally understand what people mean by characters being the most important part of a story. I learned a lot reading it =)

thank you for the kind ask!

#ask #anonymous #glass harmonica

[mickmundy]

okay so i half-answered this on cc itself, but i wanted to further elaborate and upload pictures to talk about what i mean and to give more of an "in depth" answer/advice so here i am! gonna stick this under a cut since it's a little lengthy BUT i hope this helps! ;__;!! also obvious and necessary but irritating disclaimer i'm not a professional writer (or even among the best out there lol) so this is just what works for me and how i write and how i Enjoy writing (as opposed to it feeling like you're "hitting a wall")!

my writing style is just writing the way I would want to read a fic, if that makes sense? i wanted to read a bushmed fic that read more like a novel and less like a movie or a comic book script (if that makes sense!) that focuses on symbolism, setting and the character progression of each person involved (in this case, medic and sniper) as well as their progression as a couple. i think ship stuff often suffers greatly because one character often ends up diluted down to “Love Interest For Character A” and not portrayed as someone who is Also an important part of the series as, you know, the second main character!

that’s not to say my writing Flawlessly Executes This (or even does it at all! but i hope it does sobs) but that’s a huge goal of my own personal writing. i want medic and sniper to feel "Strong" on their own (because they are!), but not without their own sets of flaws and vulnerabilities that are talked about and dealt with as they fall in love and "become a couple" (... hopefully! >:) heh!). i think doing "character studies" for the characters you want to write about is really helpful! for me, that encompasses a LOT of things so if you were curious about that too, just lmk and i'll happily make that a separate post! ^u^

for Structuring fics themselves and delving into "actual writing advice", i'm someone who LOVES making really formal "essay-like" outlines/charts/etc for my fics, but it's ultimately not something i do until much later as a post-writing notation function (Remembering important plot points/devices as opposed to Fleshing Them Out).

idk if literally anyone else does it this way but i have a discord channel in which i just ramble (to myself and my gf if she wants to weigh in!) and blab just to Chunk Stuff Out. i'll be using some examples from the planning of my completed fic Malus as examples! while Sometimes i can just "sit down and write" my fics (as in just hopping into the doc and Writing Very Formally), a lot of my fic's Key Moments (except for the apricot dream in Fever. that i wrote in under an hour almost exactly as you read it on ao3!) are done very casually! this is quite literally how i plan/"write" my fics:

like just a fucking. MASSIVE series of run on sentences (often because im just Literally typing what my mind is thinking), emoji use and just. as fucking sloppity slapdash as you can possibly imagine. and that's alright! it's the first draft after all! what's most important is that you're getting your thoughts down. so you can read (and be appalled SDFKSFD) at this Extremely Massive wall of text, but i will let you into the Enigma That Is My Mind (that one patrick meme but its a picture of medic and sniper kissing in the thought bubble):

first of all the most essential part of my writing process is having a beautiful femme wife who gives commentary and encourages you to write the butchfemme bushmed romance of your dreams ☝️u__u! so i recommend beautiful crazy-enthusiastic femmes to inspire you as they have inspired Me (both bee and medic of course)! HEHEH

but also, i've notated some parts of that run on mess that Sticks Out (without getting wrapped up in bullet notes, highlighting etc which can feel a bit Too analytical for your first draft imo!):

in red, i'm conveying the "tone" or "emotional pull" i want to have in this scene and in yellow i'm just Notating things that are Significant to the series. the flour print on sniper that medic would eventually catch sight of at the end of the fic and envy, how medic and sniper See and Observe each other, which is obviously important to how i write them because my fics put emphasis on how they see each other and their respective differences (imagined or real)!

so then i usually take these Massive Walls Of Text (this is a short one! LOL) and dissect them and space them out, get a better visual on what i'm trying to say, and then fill things in accordingly. i find it works a lot better than trying to "bullet point" them since i just write how i think, and that's a lot less "stuffy" than trying to work off of a really Formal/"Academic-feeling" outline.

i think it's important to play around with different styles and what kind of method makes sense for you personally and to spend time honing that! even if i just write run on stuff like this ^ it helps get my brain in an easy, "rolling out writing" mode that thoughts just kinda come more naturally!

i also heavily advocate for how i post my fics (ie writing them to completion and treating them as "seasons"/parts and posting one chapter per week) becuase it allows you SOO much time to continue to write and to continue your story while preventing burnout! again i can elaborate on this in a whole other post if you wanted, but i've already prattled on so much i don't want to Ramble! ;-;

as far as keeping writing fun (or keeping it from feeling miserable at least), i sincerely advise just writing about what you like. put aspects of yourself or things you like into the characters you're writing, make your story interesting to YOU! would You want to read your own writing? i think you should!! ^v^ write the writing you want to read, and skill and technique and everything/anything else will come.

in the wake of people literally feeding fics to those stupid chatbots i emphasize even more to please put your heart into what you write and it will show and be wonderful, whether its Epic Novelizations or One Shot Smut or Whatever... it was made by you! and that's awesome! i'm so happy you're here and writing and posting, it's very brave!! <333

I LOVE YOUUUU YOU ARE EPIC AND I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!! I know what you write will be amazing and i really appreciate you asking me something like this, i hope i can hear from you (anonymously or not!) sometime soon and that this might have been at least a little helpful? ;_; ILYYYYY <3333

#dutchfoolery #thou giveth fever #tehcnicaly?

[blacksurvivalnostalgichanges]

bored. thoughts on literally all the dna stuff

jackie- "i can fix her"

hyunwoo-i kinda get weirded out by the power dynamic in the sheer idea but tbh. it's nice i think. i just want this boy to be a little happier, man

jenny-i am DYINGGG SHE BOUGHT A BAIENGIACA

xiukai:i cant believe that, to sissela, hed be the grandma who makes you feel like you need a second stomach once you visit. funny. he's 34 with the vibe of a 70 year old

aya-what are her thoughts on fentanyl. i wonder. btw it's always funny when someone goes "NO drugs. but alcohol is great". like mate thats just drug lite

alex-now i'm curious what his disease is even supposed to be, i don't recall anything about that. if it's just some sort of chronic fatigue thing then i'd easily say fuck it and headcanon POTS just because but. i'd like to know

leon: "don't bring gifts for me >:( i'm not a kid >:(" the repression is strong on this man

chiara:i think itd be funny to have an alliance where it's zahir, chiara and aya. impossible to understand a damn word. also "i can fix her" part 2

shoichi:you know how it's canon that chidi anagonye is buff because whenever he felt stressed he just did pushups

sissela:she likes strawberry. noted. also ngl i do find the thomas sissela dynamic sick now that i think about it. for a solid second i felt so mentally ill remembering that he brought her to the experiment because he wanted her to get actually cured and not be in pain

rio-i feel VINDICATED. every time. i want to put that "rio to yuki" voiceline on my forehead. they don't get along on such a fundamental level. they have not had a single good interaction. that's why i feel feral when i see anyone ship them, she hates himmmm. also the delivery is bad but in a way that's good because it fits her, she sounds robotic but it feels like it's just how she be OHSFKSDF SHE DOESNT EVEN LIKE DOGS!!! SHE ACTUALLY FUCKING HATES HIM IM LAUGHING

echion-"i see the hesitation in your fists" about hyunwoo is making me mentally ill. also "don't be pretentious" to magnus IS SO FUNNY. he really went "stfu i'm gonna hit you". the things i dislike is also extremely funny. this sign can't stop him because he can't read, guys. though, he sounds like hunter toh to me in a way that makes me like him by association now. past me is crying but current me thinks this mans is funny as hell

tia-im crying. "what's wrong with my hair (┬┬﹏┬┬)". danny boy roasted her so hard. that "can i draw you ◕_◕ " to jenny though. i see you

daniel-even daniel cant believe it when she says she's a doctor. the doubt in this man's voice. also it's so funny how he reads people for their appearance (like "your hair is a mess) and then with yuki he just roasts him for his personality. does he think that bowl cut ass hairstyle is okay enough to focus on something else

eva-"nah i don't feel like getting a haircut quite yet" as he definitely fucking SEETHES

bianca-"oh my god a fellow weirdo!!!". four person alliance between aya chiara zahir and bianca actually. impossible to parse a single word. and it's funny that she goes gentle on sissela (i assume she's too skinny, so) and with echion she plain goes "you have literally no body fat"

johann-YO????? i am mentally ill about that one for sure. johann is so about trying to be the sort of christian who doesn't suck absolute ass and the interaction that has with the extremely complicated relationship isol and rozzi have with church and religion is so interesting to me rn

laura-how did they get away with this "things i dislike" line. also the bizarre thought process i had with aya and laura is so vindicated. police officers are her favorite

aiden-he did not just "we're not so different you and i" her. his luke is funny as hell though. "you get paid to clean? 🤨" do i need to explain society to you???? he sounds legit confused. hKFJNSDKFJ THEY JUST SHOVED ALL THE FUNNY MEME LINES ON HIM HUH. IT'S NOT LIKE I LIKE YOU OR ANYTHING BAKA

elena-she and rosalio allying would be nonstop complaining. they'd either hate each other or be like soulmates. "i hate the heat but i hate the cold" "me too" and then a look of understanding

felix-he did not hit elena with the "you'd be prettier if you smiled". i like him but. girl freeze him. also confirmation that magnus does not use steroids. weird-ass way to ask though. what if he met a trans person mid transition? would he hit them with that exact line as the poor fucker is like "yeah???"

#not a quote #i'd have to record it to save it so. oh well #learned my lesson the hard way on the first close. you HAVE to be thorough #i don't feel like it right now. might start getting it done later

[writing-on-the-wahl]

Part two to boys and butter? (I know I already requested something but still)

Ok here goes! Hope you enjoy!

Part 1 here. (based off a prompt by @nuttynutcycle)

*special thanks to @im-a-wonderling for the beta read, edits, and fantastic ideas!!* 

----------------------------------

Villain was washing her hair, for the fourth time, cursing stupid heroes for forcing her to get her hair wet. In water. For the fourth time that day.

A loud pounding interrupted her ranting and her shampooing.

Who would dare?

“Uh Villain?”

She lifted her head out of the sink and turned off the water.

“What!?!”

“Um well, Sidekick is here.”

“And?”

“Well, he uh, he says he wants to talk?”

She growled and reached for a towel.

Henchman leapt back as she wrenched open the door, spraying water droplets in every direction. “So you just let him in?”

How did he even know where her lair was?

“No!! He’s standing outside the front door.”

Might as well post a billboard saying ‘Villain lives here!’

“Get him inside, now!”

“Where—?”

“I don’t care! The entryway! Just get him off the street!”

Henchman scrambled away as Villain took the towel to her hair before pulling up the hood of her jacket.

She should probably have her people send Sidekick away, vulnerable as she was at the moment, but this didn’t feel like a trap. At least not the dangerous kind. More of the buttery kind.

She stomped through the upstairs, her henchmen darting out of her way. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she paused. Her mask was still upstairs covered in nasty butter, and even if Sidekick knew where she lived, she didn’t need him seeing her face as well.

“Hit the lights!” she shouted.

Every single light in the house went out. At least her people were efficient.

She tugged her hood down further as she rounded the corner to the entryway, clinging to the shadows.

Sidekick stood framed in the light shining through the window on the front door, his hands raised unthreateningly to the sides.

“Why didn’t you just turn off the lights with your powers?” It was a curious question rather than a judgmental one, and so quiet she wondered if he’d meant to say it out loud.

Before she could answer, he shook his head. “Right sorry!” He muttered. “Not my business. That’s not why I came...” It was clear now he was in fact talking to himself, and hadn’t yet noticed her come in. His hand darted up to his glasses, pushing them back up the bridge of his nose, before the cocking of her henchmen’s guns sent his hand back away from his body. “Sorry! Sorry! Nervous habit!”

Villain couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on her lips.

“Have you ever dropped a blow dryer in water?”

He jerked around, scanning the shadows until he spotted her. “I-um-no? But that sounds rather dangerous.... electrical currents in water can lead to...”

“Exactly.”

His face was half in shadow, but the adorable confusion was easy to see.

“I was washing my hair.”

His face, or what she could see of it, flushed red.

“I’m sorry-I didn’t... I don’t...”

Oh this was too fun.

But she decided to put him out of his misery.

“In the sink. My hair is wet...Wet hair, electrical current...” she waved her hands in an explosive gesture and didn’t have to wait long for him to piece it together. It was a rather unfortunate twist of her powers that she could essentially summon lightning, but if she was the slightest bit wet, all that energy went into her rather than her intended target.

“So you can’t use your powers when you’re wet?”

Oh no.

She’d been so distracted by his utterly innocent flustering that she hadn’t thought about the ramifications of telling a member of Hero Agency her biggest weakness.

Should she just kill him now?

But he was so cute...

Sidekick had noticed her silence. He groaned. “Listen. This isn’t why I’m here. I promise I won’t tell anyone.”

“Then why are you here?”

He reached for his pocket, but froze as her henchmen advanced.

“Sorry! Sorry! I just need to get something out of my pocket.” He looked at her, or rather, in her direction, since she was still obscured by the darkness.

Villain dipped her head. “It’s alright. Just move very slowly.”

He took her words to heart, moving with painstaking slowness as he pulled a small paper from his front pocket. He gingerly unfolded it before extending it out to her.

“Other Henchman?”

Other Henchman stepped forward, gun aimed at Sidekick’s chest, and took the paper. He backed up until he was out of arms reach, then turned and delivered her the paper. She squinted at the writing, fingered the thick paper. It wasn’t a note, it was a $100 bill.

“What is this?”

“It’s $100.”

“I know that.” He flinched at the venom in her voice, and she mentally reminded herself to be gentle.

“Why are you handing me money, Sidekick?”

“It’s a bribe.”

“A what?”

“Or a payment. I mean however you want to look at it. And I can’t explain, so please don’t ask me any questions, but I will give you $100 if you let me borrow your mask for an hour.”

Hero blinked, several times, thinking back on the strange events of the day. First the heroes... now Sidekick.

“Are you making a game of me?” The quiet question hung in the air for the briefest moment before—

“NO!!” The outburst from the timid Sidekick made her jump.

He ran his fingers through his curly hair, but this time her people didn’t bother to protest his sudden movement. They could tell, as she could, that he wasn’t a threat.

“I’m not trying to mock you, but I can’t explain right now. But... please?”

Villain couldn’t doubt his sincerity.

“So you’re wanting to… what? Rent my mask for an hour?”

“Yes.” He squeaked out.

“And what’s to guarantee you’ll bring it back?”

He paused. “I give you my word.”

Villain laughed. “You’ll have to forgive me for doubting the word of a sworn enemy.”

Sidekick shifted from foot to foot.

“Well, what else do you have?” Sidekick’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What are you willing to offer as collateral?”

“I--” He reached into his pockets. Keys, wallet, phone. Nothing she was interested in.

“What’s that around your neck?”

Sidekick’s hand flew to the chain peeking out of the collar of his shirt. “Nothing!” he replied too quickly.

“Hmmmm. Well I think I’ve made my decision. You can leave whatever it is that’s hanging around your neck here with me until you return my mask, or you can leave now, before I decide to keep you here, indefinitely.” She wasn’t actually into the whole kidnapping scene, but she couldn’t resist teasing him.

“I..It’s… you wouldn’t want it.”

“Oh?”

He pulled the chain out of his shirt, revealing a small blue shell. She knew he had some sort of water affinity, but had avoided him. The whole ‘get wet and your powers backfire thing’ really stole the appeal of being close enough to see his powers in action.

Villain raised her eyebrows. “Explain.”

“Well, I have water powers.”

“And? Hurry up, little hero. Before my offer expires.”

He sighed and dragged a hand down his face. “Igetmypowersfromtheshell.”

It took her a moment to process his jumbled words, then Villain blinked. Twice.

“I- well..” She’d been expecting some sentimental ‘I remember the day I found this shell’ drivel, but… his powers came from a shell? The look on his face told her he wasn’t lying. She didn’t want to be anywhere near some mystical shell-thing, but she’d already made her offer.

“The shell as collateral for my mask. Take it or leave it.” She waved the $100 bill. “Oh and either way, I’m keeping this.”

Sidekick closed his eyes and nodded once.

“Henchman,” she signaled him to draw closer. He listened to her instructions before darting up the stairs.

When he came back down, he held out his hand, but she waved him off, pointing at Sidekick.

Sidekick stiffened at Henchman’s approach, but relaxed when he saw the object Henchman held pinched between two fingers. He reluctantly pulled the chain over his head and dropped it into Henchman’s open palm before taking the mask Henchman now extended to him.

“Careful it’s-"

“What in the world?”

Villain covered her eyes. She really should have cleaned her mask first.

“Don’t ask.”

Sidekick nodded. “Ok then. I guess I’ll just be going?”

He took a hesitant step back, and when no one stopped him, he gradually turned and grasped the handle of the door.

“Sidekick?”

He froze.

“60 minutes. Starting... now.”

He vanished out the door.

Villain sniffed her hair and gagged. Then she went back upstairs to wash it for the fifth time. She should have been plotting revenge against Other Hero, but instead she was puzzling over a endearingly curious curly-headed, glasses-wearing sidekick and the tiny blue shell that now hung around her neck.

#hero x villain #heroes and villains #hero #villain #boys and butter #villain x sidekick #snippet #my writing #write #writeblr #sidekick

[ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa]

Hello, I have a question (you don't have to answer it publically if you don't want to), but I'm curious as to what your thought process was when deciding to make Footprints (and to a lesser degree the Triple Frontier fic) a reader insert while also building in these implicit descriptions by having the reader character be from a certain family. Like I know this site shuns OCs, but it just seems needlessly alienating to anyone who can't possibly fit that character concept.

I thought about ignoring this, but instead I sat on it for a bit and decided that I am going to answer. Your message started out genuinely interested, and I am not sure if you meant it to end on the rude note that it did, but I digress--

Let’s talk about empathy. 

When people read stories where the main character is not like them, you have to learn to empathize to really immerse yourself in the story. You need to walk a mile in their shoes. Any author wants their protagonist to be relate-able in some way. They need to be in order for us to feel their struggles, their pain, their happiness, their journey. Reader inserts cut out the middle man. The POV is changed and reader inserts basically do the work for you. “You” already ARE the protagonist and much less belief needs to be suspended in order for you to be someone else---the rest requires an ability to use your imagination and a willingness to see yourself as something you are not. 

When I started writing Footprints, it was my first reader insert ever, and my return to writing fanfiction after six years. I have gone back and edited the first chapter to get rid of the describing words that I used as I was basically writing myself. Since then descriptions have been incredibly neutral and I pay close attention to that. Reader’s mother is dead, it talks nothing of her lineage and all you know is her father was a Lannister. She is the family outcast. She can look however you want her to. Does this contribute to them shunning her? Possibly? You decide. Her belonging to the Lannister house in Footprints was strictly for plot plot plot plot. For very obvious reasons. 

Now, in Addicted, I chose to have reader be Pope’s sister strictly to explore the sibling dynamic between them and what would happen IF. I had never seen it done before because most of us are simultaneously thirsting over Pope AND Frankie. Once again this was a choice based on plot. It never goes into detail on if they are biological siblings, if they were adopted, if they were fostered in the same house hold, etc--that is a decision you get to make. Now, if anyone reading this story cannot imagine themselves as having a Latino brother...then that is a whole new topic that is incredibly sad for that individual, and once again goes back to needing a lesson in empathy. 

Let me use one of my favorite reader stories ever out here. @pettyprocrastination writes a reader insert for Maxwell Lord called “Rip Out Our Seams & Stitch Us Together. The reader is a black woman who owns her own sewing business in D.C. I am not black. I am not a seamstress. I do not live in D.C. This does not keep me from enjoying this story and TJ’s writing IMMENSELY. Because I am empathizing with the character she has created. The excerpt that comes to mind is this one--

  There’s a brief moment of panic in your heart before you steady yourself. It’s late, you're alone, a black woman in D.C with nobody at her side, you've been in this position before and will continue to be as such. The door is only a few paces behind you, if you had to, you could turn and sprint to make it in time.

I read this and thought ‘oh shit, I know what it feels like to be out late as a woman walking alone’. Then I thought ‘OH SHIT, Im imagining being a black woman out late walking alone. OH SHIT.’  This is something I will NEVER fully understand or experience in real life but I got to experience in her story as “me”. This does not make me feel “needlessly alienated” as you so kindly put. because once again--empathy. 

It is important to TJ that reader is black because she has a certain story that she wishes to tell. So, as a reader, it’s important to me. 

Now, on the flip side, is it important to me that the reader is white? ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT. Because I know that I can throw a rock in the dark and hit a piece of media where the protagonist looks just like me. So, it is my job as a writer to keep my stories inclusive and my descriptions vague enough that anyone can enjoy them. It is also my job as a reader of fic to consume, reblog, and support writers of color who explicitly say their reader is not white.

Empathy.

[natjennie]

hey as for ur adhd reading post: yes! as for ur tags, there r def some things out there that can make text easier for ur brain to process etc, unfortunately i dont have names to give u off the top of my head (however i've often found resources made for dyslexic folks to also help my adhd brain a bunch!) but sometimes i just copy paste shit into a doc/note and put it bolded, with a font my brain likes, and usually double space the lines. besides that tho- the reason ur brain wants u to skip ahead when reading is because ur thought process is racing ahead as it usually does (#EternalADHDMood) but that doesn't mean it wants to /process/ that fast, it's like a kid on a sugar high lol, all energy, no processing. so i've actually found it helpful to allow my brain to skip ahead line by line / paragraph by paragraph just to process a few words, no spoilers, bc its like my brain has the compulsion to leap-frog ahead, but its not actually reading shit properly. so i get it out of my system by allowing my eyes to skip around a bit ahead, sometimes even scrolling (if on a device) too fast to properly read shit, just have my eyes n brain jump around, and it satisfies that need my brain has, and then i go back up and find it easier to read the rest and have my mind kind register it as 'filling in the blanks' which is more interesting to my curious adhd brain, vs reading it all meticulously in order to reach the conclusion which feels more like reading a long list that i have to struggle thru to get to the good shit/reward my brain wants. does that make any sense? lol. there's def other ways, im literally a teacher that specializes in neurodivergence and adhd, but starting as an adult vs a kid is a diff thing cause ur brain is set in its ways by now and u kinda have to gently retrain it with creative strategies i find, idk. just rambling here. that's also the eternal adhd mood haha

the resources available for dyslexic people helping with adhd too is so interesting to me! I just recently added a chrome extension that makes text the opendyslexic font and it’s helping so far. I think the thing I was thinking of that changes the color of lines is called beeline reader, if anyone else was interested. but also, allowing yourself to jump ahead for a second is a great tip. I think i keep getting caught up in like Fixing the things my adhd makes me do instead of like, working around them and accommodating for them. I gotta get better at that.

#agayconcept

[snarkwriteswrasslin]

FFT: you jump, i jump jack; pete dunne

Notes:

This came to my main asks via @vonschweetz​ and it got me thinking... What if I redid Barbie and Pete entirely. And made Barbie a brattier little Omega, more resistant. I still might want to do this, we shall see... It was an interesting take.

Summary:

Bratty omega meets stubborn as fuck alpha. let the games begin.

Pairing:

Pete Dunne x OFC, Barbie

Warnings:

Uhh... flirtation and banter, bratty omegas and stubborn alphas. It’s cute. Seriously. I might actually try doing something with this.

Barbie looked from man to man, totally unimpressed. Folding her arms, she cleared her throat when they finally took a break from their whole territorial thing. “Will you two kindly knock it the fuck off? And get lost, your Alpha stink is probably what’s keeping my true Alpha from making himself known.”

“You don’t have an Alpha. You could have me, but you won’t stop being stubborn.”

“I’d clearly be better for you than that asshole. C’mon. Think about it. You and me, baby.”

“All you two idiots are doing is making me dryer than the Sahara desert. Fuck off.” Barbie practically spat the words at the two men and luckily, it was enough to send them away. This time.

… oh but those two twat waffles will be back. They always come back… if I could just hurry and figure out who back here is my true Alpha…

… but what if it’s somebody you don’t want to be mated to?…

… anyone has to be better than Oney Lorcan and fucking Matt Cross… anyone…

Almost as if she’d summoned it, the scent was back again and it was… So heavy. It dominated the air and Barbie breathed in deep. Fanning herself, she leaned back against the brick wall and let her eyes flit around the room, careful to not settle on any particular member of the roster.

It couldn’t be Tyler Bate or Trent Seven.

She knew it wasn’t any of the Undisputed Era, she’d gotten close enough to each man earlier in the week to realize that they were not only not the scent she’d been trying to find, but their scents all actually repulsed her.

None of them had that unique combination of Big Red chewing gum and freshly upturned earth like this scent. And while normally, the scent of dirt did literally nothing for her, in this case it was… Like the most erotic thing she’d ever smelled in her life.

It wasn’t Johnny Gargano, either.

So far, no one she’d tried to get close to matched this particular scent.

Distractedly, Barbie stepped away from the wall and gave in to the urge to follow her nose. As she started to walk down the hall, the scent got heavier and heavier, beckoning her. Turning a corner and entering catering, she managed to collide with Pete Dunne around the same time that the scent suddenly intensified. Pete gripped her arms, a gruff swear coming as he said something to her about watching where she walked, only to trail off in mid sentence.

“It’s you.”

They both said it at the same time, but Dakota called out to her and she bit her lip, staring up at her true Alpha a few seconds, trying to get a read on how the current situation affected him.

She couldn’t. He masked his thoughts on the matter heavily.

Barbie’s face fell and she turned abruptly, hurrying over to Dakota and one or two of the other girls.

Pete blinked and turned to scowl at Tyler, who’d just come up behind him and shoved him playfully. “What was ‘at about, Dunney?”

“I found ‘er.”

“And yer not over there with ‘er why? Who was it?”

“The blonde talkin t’ Dakota and the other girls. Th’ one with curly hair.”

Tyler followed his friends gaze and he gave a low and appreciative whistle as he muttered quietly, “Y’ lucky fuckin bastard. Well don’t let me stop y’. Go on, go to ‘er.”

Pete raised a brow and rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

“Yer an idiot, Dunney.”

“Don’t think she was too happy with th’ realization I’m ‘er Alpha.”

“Or maybe, she took one look at yer grouchy mug and retreated because she thought she pissed y’ off. I mean if y’ gave ‘er the look y’ gave me just now, Dunney…” Tyler pointed out as helpfully as possible, but when Pete shook his head no, Tyler grumbled and shook his head.

“Well, I found him.”

“Seriously? Who? I need to know.”

“It’s Pete Dunne. But I don’t… I really don’t think he was thrilled when he realized what was happening… So.. That’s that.”

“What the hell do you mean that’s that? Pete’s always a grouch, that’s just who he is.”

“This was different. He looked annoyed. Maybe I should just give in to one of the other unmated douchebags who keep offering…” Barbie knew deep down that even as she said it, she’d never go through with it, because when she’d realized it was Pete… Something just clicked for her.

She sighed and shook her head, shoving it all out of her mind for the time being. “C’mon.. Someone in here is staring and it’s kinda creeping me out.” Barbie grabbed hold of Dakota’s arm, practically dragging her out of catering.

She collided with Roderick Strong in the hallway. Swallowing hard, she stared up at him, mumbling an apology. Roderick flashed her a grin and leaned against the doorway, pinning her in. “No need to apologize, darlin. You alright?”

“I’m fine, just.. In a hurry.” Barbie nodded to the doorway he was currently blocking and he chuckled, moving to the side. He caught hold of her wrist and held her there a few seconds the second he saw Pete Dunne staring at her from the doorway of catering.

“If any of these idiots mess with ya, Blondie.. Come find Roddy, alright?”

Barbie pried her wrist loose and gave him a thumbs up before rushing off.

Pete’s fists clenched and Tyler muttered to himself with an amused laugh, “And ‘ere we go.” before quickly grabbing hold of his best friend and starting the process of talking him down from whatever ‘punishment’ Pete was currently doling out to Strong in his head.

Pete growled and took a deep breath.

“What y’ need t’ do, Dunney, is go to ‘er and tell ‘er that whatever she thinks isn’t th’ truth.”

“What I need t’ do, Bate, is go down t’ the ring and call ‘im out. Maybe if I make an example out ‘f him, none of the others will even think about tryin it.”

“And when y’ scare th’ living hell out of ‘er Dunney… what then? Just wait til the next time y’ see Strong lurking around, go over and intervene. That proves yer point without anybody bein afraid or havin t’ die.” Tyler eyed his best friend as he said it.

For once, Pete seemed to agree. Tyler let out a breath and then, they made their way down to the ring for the match they had.

– ( LE TIME SKIPPE )

“Clearly, me staying at the hotel while everyone else went out was a stupid idea. I’m so freaking bored!” Barbie was pacing her hotel room, fingers tangled in blonde curls as she tried to keep the worst part of her heat starting at bay.

She eyed the door and then her phone and remembering the annoyed look on Pete’s face earlier, she swore and grabbed the phone, firing off a text.

→ Hey, I’m gonna meet you guys after all.

→ No sense in me locking myself away and saving myself for an Alpha who clearly couldn’t want me less if he tried.

→ It’s that club near the beach, right?

Without waiting on a response, she showered and got out, putting on makeup and digging through her closet. When she saw the skintight little red dress that one of her friends got her as a ‘joke’ she bit her lip and hesitated. She almost passed it over in favor of something casual, her favorite jeans and crop top, but then she thought about it.

She knew who her true Alpha was now. And given that he didn’t seem like he’d be beating down her door anytime soon, was there really any sense in waiting or getting her hopes up?

She tore the tag off the dress and took it into the bathroom, changing into it. Before she could talk herself out of going out and having a fun night, she walked down the stairs and through the lobby.

Just as she went to reach for the handle on the door out of the lobby, Pete stepped in.

“Where th’ hell are y’ going?” Pete blurted it out before he could stop himself from doing so, earning him snickering from both Tyler and Trent.

“Out.”

“Out where?”

“Out. I’m supposed to be meeting someone. Can you kindly remove yourself, sir?” Barbie gazed up at Pete, tapping a stiletto against the floor impatiently.

“Not like ‘at.”

Barbie glanced down at her dress.. Before she could stop herself, she was glancing back up at him with a smirk. “Oh? And you’re gonna stop me how, sir?”

“My name is Pete. Not sir.” Pete was moving closer, Barbie was… beyond well aware of the difference in their height. She swallowed hard and fought to reign herself in because if she didn’t…

It wasn’t going to be pretty.

Self composure was harder than she’d always thought it’d be when she finally found her true Alpha.

She felt her thighs clench.

Pete was eyeing her up, almost as if he were in disbelief that she’d talk back to him.

The thought made her smirk a little, giggling quietly. She cleared her throat. “I’m running late. Either you’re going to do something about what I’m wearing, Alpha, or you’re going to move out of my fucking way.” she said it in her politest tone of voice. Pete edged closer, a hand hesitating before settling on her hip.

He stared her down intently.

Tyler and Trent cleared their throats, exchanging looks and Barbie raised her hand, resting it palm down against the front of Pete’s hoodie, staring at the door they currently blocked intently.

“It looks like I’m gonna have to be the one who walks away.” Barbie said it as she tried to side step Pete.

Pete stood there, watching her walk out of the lobby, his hand in his hair.

“ ‘at went well, Dunney.” Trent broke the silence. Pete’s response was to shove his gear bag at Trent and start to storm out the door. Trent and Tyler shared a look and grumbled. Tyler found a room service attendant and put the bags onto a trolly to be taken up and he caught up to Trent in the parking lot just in time to watch everything as it happened.

Pete caught up to her and tapped her shoulder. Barbie came to a stop and turned, staring up at him with a look of curious amusement in her eyes. “You? I thought we settled this in the lobby, sir.”

“It’s Pete. And we didn’t.” Pete’s tone was firm but quiet. She was migrating closer.. A quick scenting revealed everything and he groaned inwardly as soon as he realized that Tyler had been right back at the arena.

She’d gotten the wrong idea. She had no idea just how blown away he’d been to find out that the vanilla scent he’d been chasing for a while now was her.

Or that he’d noticed her around the time he started to smell mentioned scent and he’d been… attracted, to say the least.

His eyes darted down to the red dress and he cleared his throat. “ Maybe y’ thought I was makin a suggestion, but I was being serious, Omega.”

“My name is Barbie.”

“Barbie.” Pete repeated her name, still gazing down at her intently. Barbie tapped her feet impatiently again, her tongue gliding over her lips to moisten them. Pete’s eyes darted up, settling on her mouth and the attention that the gesture bought to it. He shrugged off his hoodie and thrust it at her.

Barbie eyed the hoodie and then him and she gave a quiet giggle.

“I’m not bein’ funny.”

“No, but… Do you think when you say jump, Alpha… that I’m just gonna ask you how high?”

“Not at all. I’d say it goes both ways.”

“I’m not putting on that hoodie. And why does it matter anyway? What I wear, I mean..” Barbie was moving closer, despite her best efforts to refrain from doing so. Pete gave a satisfied smirk when he felt her body tuck into his. He chuckled and rubbed his chin, trying to think about a response.

Barbie’s phone lit up and started to ring.

“One second.” Barbie answered the phone and she was in the midst of telling Dakota the situation when Pete took the phone and informed Dakota that Barbie wasn’t going to make it.

After ending the call, he held her phone out to her.

“Y’ weren’t in any shape t’ go out alone tonight anyway.”

“Who are you, my father?”

“No, but I am yer Alpha. We both know it.”

Barbie scoffed. “Now you want to claim it.”

“Wanted to earlier. Someone didn’t really give me much time t’ react.”

“The annoyed look on your face was reaction enough.” Barbie stepped away, turning and preparing herself to walk away. She’d never been the kind of girl to just fall in line, follow a rule or an order.

She would’ve kept walking too if Pete hadn’t called out calmly, “ Y’ can keep fighting it.. But y’ know what y’ really feel. I can smell it in yer scent. Fightin is only gonna make it worse on y’.”

“I’m not fighting anything, pal. If you want me, come and get me, Pete.”

Barbie started to slink away and for a split second, because no one was around to see him do it, a smile played on Pete’s lips as he took a deep breath to reign himself in and started to calmly walk after her.

She’d just stepped into the club and was waving at the girls when she felt him pressing into her from behind. “Okay, Barbie. I’ll play yer game. But know that when I play games, I play them t’ win.”

Barbie bit her lip to keep from whimpering and after a second, she managed to reply, “We’ll see, Pete. Think you can handle dancing with me or would that be too much?”

Pete turned her around, pulling her close.

“I don’t dance.”

“This works too..”

#pete dunne fanfiction #pete dunne fanfic #pete dunne fic #pete dunne oneshot #pete dunne imagine #// heavily implied alpha and omega dynamics #// retelling of barbie and pete

[a-memory-of]

Well into the evening bells, Arshtat Ejinn moved away from the campfires of Athra in search of Madoc. In the distance and across the waves, she could see the heavy fog surrounding the island and she tried to swallow down the uneasy feeling she always felt when she looked to it. It was not hard, her mind was elsewhere.

Earlier that morning she had a long, heartfelt talk with Miss Red. And ever since then, she had been restless, trying to busy herself away from camp. She had swam, but even that had not fully calmed her nerves. As she walked, she tried to plan what she would say. But she truly did not know where to start.

Perhaps sensing something off, or simply knowing his mother was on the move, Khuu followed her down toward the beach. He gently bumped his head under her hand, and she turned to look down at him. Despite it all, she could not help the gentle smile. "Want to help me look for him, then?" Along a rocky portion of the beach-side, two glimmers of firelight could be seen in the distance, one far lower to the ground than the other. In the light, the form of Madoc Parnell could be seen holding a torch, and he was speaking with one of the Goblins.

There was no secretive air to their meeting, and from where Arshtat stood, she could already make out a few words. They appeared to be talking about the 'nightbeast', and the tracks that were recently discovered in the north.

Madoc paused as he sensed movement from the corner of his eye, and he spotted Khuu first. His hulking, striped feline frame was easier to decipher in the evening light. Whether by process of elimination, or because he recognized her posture, he noticed Arshtat next.

"Luv," Madoc greeted warmly, the usual smirk on his face.

The Goblin turned, a quiet 'shkoh' from the gas mask, and then gave a polite wave. As Arshtat approached the lights, Khuu ran ahead to greet Madoc himself. He looked back toward Arshtat, and trotted between the two a few times as if to say he had found Madoc all on his own. Hanging back a little, Arshtat raised a hand in greeting to the Goblin in return.

She had expected Madoc to be alone, and now seemed unsure. He could probably tell there was something on her mind, but she did her very best to be polite. "I am sorry... I hope I did not i-interrupt." "Not interruptin'," Madoc was quick to assure. He glanced down at Khuu, his smirk tugged, and he looked back up to Arshtat again, fondly.

The Goblin shook his head. "Was just talking about the nightbeast, pshkoh." He looked between the two—the way Madoc fondly looked at Arshtat. Reading the room, he added, "But going back to gobbietown, take safetimes."

"Aye," Madoc replied with a small wave of his hand, and he began to tread toward Arshtat as the Goblin scampered back to the settlement. "What're you doin' out here, luv? Lookin' for me?" He grins. "Oh, yes... I hope the tracks we find w-will give us answers," Arshtat nodded, knowing the situation was a worry for everyone, most especially the Goblins who had allowed them what safety they could. When the Goblin excused himself, Arshtat gave a small nod of her head in goodbye.

The question instantly got a reaction from Arshtat. She looked like she had been caught, shoulders tensing and her cheeks coloring, "I... no---! I m-mean, yes... I was looking for you!" Taking a breath, and trying to settle herself back down, she looked up to him, "I mean... will you take a walk with me?" Madoc released a chuckle at her flustering. There was a curious gleam in his eyes at the request, but bit back any questions. “‘Course, it’s a nice evening for it.”

The tall Xaela stepped closer. His torch would provide ample light for them to walk as the night grew darker. He offered Khuu a friendly scritch, then put his hand at the small of Arshtat’s back and smirked to her. “So, which way?” Arshtat hesitated a moment, but Khuu helped to decide for her. Looking up to Madoc, and keeping close, she gestured with a small nod of her head after the tiger, "Just down the b-beach a bit?" Madoc was not wrong, the night was nice. There was a calm breeze, and Arshtat always appreciated the soft sounds of the gently rolling waves on the shoreline.

As they walked down toward the sand, Arshtat bit down on her lip. She still had not decided the best approach, or how to start. But Red's words echoed in her head, and she was determined to see it through, and be there for Madoc.

"Madoc...?" she tried, after walking in silence for several minutes. "Are... you doing all right?" Madoc peered down at her, one brow quirked. “Aye, ‘course I am.” The response came easy and with a smirk, born of innate confidence the Xaela carried. “Still a ways to go before we can get to the island proper. Gotta get the locals on our side first.” He jerked his head toward the town, where its faint lights glimmered in the distance.

Pausing, he turned the torch to get a better look at her face. Something seemed amiss, though he couldn’t put his finger on it. “Somethin’ on your mind, luv?” The easy, almost expected answer, made Arshtat frown. Perhaps before she foolishly would not have questioned it, and yet now she felt as though she must. What he spoke of, they were worries, yes, things they needed to do. But there had to be something else.

She looked up at the question, noting he was intently watching her face and quickly looked back down. Arshtat took a deep breath, still quite determined. She never had issues speaking with Madoc before, and quietly wondered why this time was so different.

"Is... something not on yours?" she finally asked, tilting her head to the side. "The... Archivist," it was the first time she had actually referred to it as something other than 'the pit.' "It... i-it knew your ring. B-But it said itself, it does not know th-things not from the island..." Madoc stopped walking. His features fell—not much, but just enough that Arshtat would know something had changed. “...So you saw that, mmh?” He smiled at her. Of course she did.

He looked down at his right hand, the crimson ring glistening in the torchlight. “Got some thoughts on it,” he said, once again avoiding the question. The hand clenched and released. “Need to know more.” When Madoc stopped, Arshtat stopped a step after and turned to look back at him with a worried frown. That pause alone was telling enough. "Thoughts?" she questioned, trying once more to get him to share them.

"W-When did you... see Wolf last...?" Arshtat also tried a more specific approach. She was still fidgeting, but she was at least attempting to catch Madoc's eye. "Are you... certain he never came here?" Madoc’s gaze flicked to meet hers, and he smirked. Finding a nearby rock, he leaned the torch against it so that it could burn while he sat. He eased onto the sand and motioned for her to join him.

“C’mere, luv,” he invited, offering no answer yet. _____________________

With @thrillofbattle

Arshtat was not quite sure what to make of that smirk, but when asked, she obediently moved to settle beside him on the sand. Khuu noticed they had stopped, and trotted back toward them. He circled a moment, then lay down half curled around them both, tail occasionally flicking back and forth. Madoc pulled Arshtat closer to him, so that nothing could be missed in each other’s eyes. He allowed his hands to wander, just a little, toward her hips and thighs. Even in these circumstances, he was insatiable for her. Khuu provided a little warmth, for as big and near as he was.

This was how he was most comfortable, and it was easier to speak matters closer to his heart. “Don’t think Wolf would lie to me...but can’t say I wouldn’t deserve it if he did.” When tugged closer, again Arshtat did not fight it. She welcomed the nearness with her own troubled thoughts. The hand at her hip was worrying, almost. She did not know if he was not taking such talk as serious as he should, or if it was something else.

But his following words led her to believe it was indeed something else. He was still not admitting much, giving answers that were vague. So, she pressed him further. "Why would you say that...? Was he u-upset with you?" Fora brief moment, a curious gleam flickered over his dark eyes. She was asking a lot of questions—more than she usually did. But if there was anyone who could get away with asking him anything, it was her.

“Nay. Wolf was firm but patient; think the only time I’d ever seen ‘im mad at me was when I’d run off as a young lad and nearly get myself killed. And even then, it’s just ‘cause he cared.”

He eyed her, curious once again, but continued. “His death, it—hit me hard,” he finally relented, the smirk fading. “I'd let my beast take over for cycles, did things that’d shame ‘im. Wouldn’t be surprised if he knew what I’m capable of becomin’...but don’t think he’d set me up into some sort of trap. ...Kind of infuriating.” Arshtat kept her eyes on his as he spoke, only dropping them down once he had stopped, and it was clear she was deep in thought. Her head leaned a little closer, offering nearness as a form of comfort. She knew loss, they both did. She understood.

"I think he'd be proud of you," she said firmly, turning back to look up at him again. "I do not know w-what you did, a-and I would listen, if you told me... but I also do not need to, to know that."

She shifted, small hand finding his larger one. Arshtat's fingers touched the red ring upon Madoc's hand. "We all hold shame. We... have done things we w-wish we did not. But it is how we choose to live after... yes? H-He would see you were strong enough to change." “I’d like to think so, aye.” His smirk appeared more easily, and the look of fondness returned as he studied her. Their talk seemed to ease him some, and he didn’t appear as burdened as he was before. His thumb played with the underside of his ring finger, nudging the crimson ring this way and that. His other hand shifted to the small of Arsh’s back.

“This ring’s got a history—one that Wolf never told me. Maybe it’s from ‘ere. Maybe that’s why Wolf’s so interested in this place. Or maybe he doesn’t know. Maybe it’s coincidence. Maybe I’m readin’ into the whole thing. I got a lot of maybes and more questions than answers, and I’m guessin’ that pit can answer at least one of ‘em.”

#ff14 #ffxiv #rp #roleplay #rp logs #Arshtat Ejinn #Madoc Parnell #Memories of the River Daughter #Inheritance

[pinkandgreenarepurpleandyellow]

RetsuxDoyle? You did really good with Doysumi. But there's no RetsuxDoyle :/

(pre-fic note: I’m so sorry this took so long to write, i got this ask at 9 pm yesterday, wrote for an hour, and spent like 2 hours writing this before family dragged me to stuff, but it’s done now thank you again for asking!)

*cracks knuckles* A’ight, let’s get to it

Warnings for: gore mention, mentions of torture, mention of electrocution, violence mentions, swearing i think, mentions of alcohol and one mention of drugs

On with the show!

-----

The first time they see each other is not, as Retsu thinks, in the arena. The first time they met had actually been 10 years ago, an event that Retsu remembered as moronic, and what Doyle remembered as an amusing day in a crappy week.

-----

The second time is the arena, and both men are silently struck by the attractiveness of the other, with only one of them recognizing the other from their first meeting.

----

The third time they meet, it’s in the elevator of a shopping mall, as both walk home for the day. Retsu’s shocked by both the fact that he ran into the assassin, and that Doyle invited him for a drink. That entire night catalogs in Retsu’s head as insane, the Scot registering in his head as both a nuisance and a warrior with a secret heart of gold.

Doyle really doesn’t know when or how it started, but he slowly found himself more and more interested in Retsu. The man’s honor, his creative use of weapons, his voice and the way he acts both when angry and happy all jumped onto the feeling of attraction, amplifying it tenfold. (1)

Retsu, on the other hand, was significantly more shocked by his interest in the redhead, denying it for a good three months, even going back to Hong Kong for a week to try and clear his head.

(he’d die before admitting this to the other students of the temple, but they all figured it out.) (2)

-----

It’s while Doyle’s in Russia, sniping a corrupt politician and busting up a mafia or two, that he stops by for a drink with one of his closest friends, one of the only people who he really trusts.

“So, to recap; You broke out of prison, flew to Japan, found ‘Egg’, got the shit beaten out of you by him, guarded his unconscious body for the night, got a free stay in the Shinshinkai hospital, joined the ‘I blew up a Shinshinkai dojo’ club with me and Phillis, admitted defeat to the golden boy of Karate, and now you’re living with golden boy and trying to ask out Egg? Did I get all of that right?” Atchison’s voice is laced with both amusement and venom, the latter a result of the cyanide capsules she stored under tongue at all times.

He nods, and both of them down their shots before signaling the bartender for another six for each of them.

“Yeah. God, I needed a drink today.”

“That bad, huh?”

“You have no idea,” he leans forward, knocking back two of the shots before continuing. “I haven't slept in almost four days, i’ve been shot sixty times, stabbed twelve times, maced three times, and to top it all off, a merc actually tried to throw a beehive at me! Where did she even get a beehive?”

Atchison chuckles, and smoothly swipes a bottle of wine from the passing-by bartender. “First of all, here,” she hands him the bottle and Doyle downs half of it in one go, “and second of all, forget the beehive, did you ask Egg out yet?”

“Working on it. Little busy with the whole career and all.”

“What’s he look like now? It’s been ten years after all.”

“Well he has hair now. And his eyebrows are even weirder than before. He’s actually kinda hot now.”

“So what are you waiting for? Go get ‘im, tiger.” And they both finish off the last of the alcohol between them, and leave without paying. They always do this when they run into each other, get a drink, talk shit about life, compare notes on the unusual people they’ve run into, but this is the first time either one has seen him a second time.

-----

Kissing Doyle feels a little like a great sparring session; it tingles and Retsu feels the redhead smile a little into the kiss. When they break apart, it’s cause of the hoots and hollers coming from the other side of the window.

“Wanna go somewhere a little quieter?” Doyle asks him, still making that cute expression between a smile and a smirk, holding his hand and pulling him up that way. Retsu smiles wide and strides out, yanking Doyle behind him.

-----

It’s been almost nine months now, and Doyle can still fluster his boyfriend with nothing more than a throwaway comment about how hot he is. He loves it, he loves the way Retsu always looks thrown, even if only for a second. Grabbing Retsu’s hand in public also seems to do the trick. Doyle would be lying if he didn’t also add that seeing Retsu blush made his heart jump a little, even now.

-----

Retsu knows that Doyle used to be an assassin, but it isn’t until now that the consequences of this strike him. (3) He puts the pieces together about a year after they start dating, when he’s woken up by arguing voices at 2 a.m. and Doyle is nowhere to be found, even though they both had gone to bed at the same time this evening. So Retsu follows the voices, all the way up to the roof, but something stops him from going up, so he listens from the window Doyle always insists on keeping open.

“......trust.......die in the field soon........can’t keep him safe.....leave.” A stranger’s voice, too low to be a woman’s, and too speaking-English-with-that-accent to be Japanese.

“..............stay.......love him......perfect.” and there’s his boyfriend’s response, sounding as quiet and calm as ever, and Retsu can’t listen like this anymore, so he climbs out of the window instead, climbing out to cling onto the drainpipe and listen from there.

“Look, for the last time, you. can’t. stay. here. Doyle.” the stranger seems almost agitated now. “You know how the job is. You know quite how often it follows you home, what if it runs into your boyfriend first? I don’t know what the ever-loving hell you smoked to get a civilian significant other and bond with him, but you need to drop it before it gets you killed.”

“No,” comes the still calm reply, “I’m not leaving him. He’s not just a civilian, he’s an expert in Chinese Kenpo, so he can most definitely beat you, or anyone else who we know. You can do whatever you want to me, but try to hurt him and you’ll have a much bigger hell to pay.”

“So what, you really love him then?” The man sounds so disbelieving of this, and for the first time, Retsu is also worrying. Oh sure, he had considered the possibility of Doyle not loving him or rejecting him before, but now he was worried that Doyle would stop loving him, an entirely different thing to be concerned about.

“Yeah, I love him,” and this is the first time Doyle’s voice has had any emotion in it, “I love him more than anything. I’d die for him, I’d kill for him, I’d re-live everything we had ever gone through for him. Every single part of it, Lennox, and if you try to hurt him--”

He’s cut off by the stranger’s, “I’m not,” he pauses, “just last question, former friend to former friend. Is it nice, being, well being in love? Being free of...our lives?” And this 'Lennox’ is probably around Doyle’s age, but the way he asks makes him sound like a little kid, curious about a world he’s never seen.

Doyle huffs out a quiet half-laugh at this, “It’s amazing, man, you should try it sometime. Living freely feels like, well, freedom. It’s like “graduation night” was, only better, and everyday.” And at that someone jumps off the roof and Retsu sees a short shadow land on the roof across him before it jumps again. That must be Lennox.

Retsu climbs back in and lies down in bed, all while trying to process everything he just heard. Doyle loves him, turned his back on his career for him, was willing to fight a friend (and Retsu knows how rare friends are for assassins, as well as that the fight between two can be fatal for both parties). His processing is interrupted by the soft, almost inaudible steps of Doyle climbing in, walking over to where Retsu is trying to fake sleeping, and lying down next to him, and his hand is immediately grabbed by Doyle’s, as though his hand is an anchor in a storm. Doyle starts tapping on the floorboards quietly, as though he doesn’t want to wake Retsu up, but the taps tell another story, all in Morse code.

“Retsu, love, I know you aren't asleep right now...Or maybe you’re awake and just zoned out, but either way....I love you..I love you more than you can imagine, and I love that I can say it like this, cause last I checked, you don’t know Morse code...You’re amazing, darling, everything about you is perfect, and I- (Doyle’s fingers falter for half a moment before continuing) I’ll never leave you, not unless you want me to..I want you to be happy even more than I want you to be with me, you deserve that happiness, you deserve the world, my love...” and Retsu’s head is spinning, drowning out whatever else comes after because he’s still reeling from the fact that Doyle’s saying all of these things to him, because this is the first time either one has managed to say ‘I love you’ not ‘i love your hair/eyes/[habit]/[talent],’ just ‘i love you’. So Retsu acts on instinct uses his free hand to send his own message.

“I love you too Doyle, you are perfection, I love you, please stay, you’re a part of life I don’t want to lose, I love you, I love you, I lov-” Retsu’s cut off by the feeling of Doyle’s lips on his, and his hands roaming over Retsu’s arms, tapping out the same message over and over again, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, and why shouldn’t Retsu return the favor and tell him too? So when they stop kissing in favor of still having oxygen in their lungs, Retsu gently pins Doyle down, and says “I love you, Doyle, I love you-”

“Hector.”

“What?”

In the dark, Doyle’s eye seems to gleam.

“My first name’s Hector, Retsu. Just...just thought you should know.” Hector, huh? Not what he expected, but when had Doyle ever been what he’d expected. Retsu tries the name in his head, and yeah, it works.

“Wǒ ài nǐ” he says to the redhead, wondering if he will understand.

“Wǒ yě ài nǐ,” comes the quiet reply as Doyle-no no- Hector looks away, whether out of embarrassment or shyness, and Retsu feels a new surge of love for the man laying next to him.

Retsu feels the part of his body that Doyle’s lying on top of starting to go numb, so he gently nudges the assassin off of him, still not letting go of his hand. They fall asleep face-to-face, and sometime during the night they must have moved, or else Doyle wouldn't have been squished against Retsu’s chest.

---

It’s easier to say, after that. Neither is still good at saying ‘I love you’ in Japanese (4), so they work around.

“Te quiero” greets Retsu when he comes home to the smell of amazing food cooking.

“Je t’aime” and a bottle of Doyle’s favorite wine make his heart skip a beat on his birthday (5).

“Ana behibak!” reads the text that makes Retsu smile, and his students tease him for letting his boyfriend distract him one in a while, but he doesn't mind.

“Ya Tabe kahayu” is written at the end of the note Doyle reads as he finds out that Retsu had to go back to his temple again and will be gone for another three weeks.

“Ich liebe Dich?” Is all Doyle has to say when Retsu finds him in the jail cell of the temple after a student tells him they caught the intruder that had been hiding in their school for ten whole days. Retsu just laughs and goes to try and explain the situation to his master.

After a rough day in the field leaves him with half a dozen bullets in his everywhere, Doyle’s fairly sore, even after he pulls the bullets out, and Retsu picks up on this fairly quickly once he comes home. Retsu makes Doyle lie down and starts massaging his shoulders before moving to the neck and the back muscles. As the redhead slowly relaxes, he starts falling asleep. The last thing he hears before his eyes close fully is, “Ani ohev otcha.”

Retsu’s master dies in a typhoon, and Retsu flies to Hong Kong the moment he gets the news. As he gets ready to leave some offerings on the grave and say goodbye, he falls to his knees, feeling emptiness and overwhelming sorrow at the same time. A hand on his shoulder steadies him, pulls him up, and Retsu isn’t surprised that there’s Doyle, holding a small bouquet of flowers and a few incense sticks. They place the offerings by the stone, and Retsu takes another second to let his master’s soul go completely. As they walk, hand in hand, the whispered “Hum Tumhe Pyar Karte hae” doesn’t take away the hurt, but it makes him feel a little less alone and a little more alive.

Doyle’s in Indonesia when he gets hurt, and so he goes to one of the underground hospitals, staffed and visited by assassins, mercenaries, killers, and other scum of the world. While he’s there, another patient goes crazy and uses his taser on Doyle, nearly killing him. The part that makes this a bad situation is that Doyle hates electrocution with a passion, even before he was sentenced to the chair he had had enough experiences with it to scar him for good. When the two are found, the crazy man’s head is missing. And when Doyle comes home, it isn’t with a light heart or a happy head, it’s still trapped in the sensation of electricity racing up and down his spine. Retsu can sense the pain radiating from Doyle, the darkness around him almost personified, covering the younger man in a way it hadn’t even when they had met at the arena. Retsu doesn’t know what to do, and when Doyle just sits down, staring at the wall blankly, Retsu sits next to him, holding his hands, and staying there for almost another 36 hours until Doyle can finally talk, and hear, and think. The first thing he hears is, “Taim i’ ngra leat,” and Retsu doesn’t stop repeating it until Doyle’s ready to stand up, embrace him, and mutter back tiredly “Taim i’ ngra leat”.

Their third anniversary is the first one where both take an entire day off their jobs to spend the time with one another. A walk in the park, a wine sampling booth, a movie, and finally, just a nice simple dinner at home. They both say it at the same time. “Ti amo” and “Te amo” are almost identical, but different enough that they can both tell the other also said it, and both know the other person feels the same way about them.

-----

They cook dinner for one another, get one another gifts, play pranks, take walks, use their everyday lives to say ‘I love you’. They never lose track of how they say it either, writing down the words and phrases and their direct translations and countries of origin on the wall. (6)

-----

They’ve long lost track of how many times they’ve said ‘i love you’ to each other. They’ve been together for five years now, married less than a week ago, so they decide to visit every country whose language they used to say ‘i love you’. The journey takes almost a year, and leaves them both with many memories, most good and some odd. The oddest to both of them is when they run into Doyle’s oldest friend, Alisson Atchison.

“Hello, Doyle. Hello, Egg,” She greets them, hanging upside down from a lamp-post in Zambia, just a mile or so from the capital. Before Retsu can ask about the strange nickname, his husband speaks

“Atchison,” Doyle nods his head in recognition. “How have you been?”

“Good, and congrats on your marriage! The wedding was a blast, but i didn’t get a chance to give you a gift, so here ya go.”

A long, slender package and two small photographs are shoved in Retsu’s face, so he takes both, hands the package to Doyle, and looks at the photographs.

The first is six kids posing as a group. The redhead in the center looks an awful lot like a much younger version of his husband, and so he hands the photo to Doyle, who looks at it and practically tackles Atchison when he recognizes it.

“You found it!”

“Yep, found all the copies, all six of them. Two are ashes now, we’ve got two, and i gave both the lovebirds their photos back.”

“Did they also like that wedding gift?” Retsu interjects

“Uh-huh! Both just look at each other, compare one another to the photos and start bickering about which one is prettier. Both of them just keep saying ‘as your wife, I declare you prettier.’ ‘no you’re prettier, and as your wife, that’s my call!’ You know how those two are.”

Doyle and Atchison keep catching up, so Retsu looks at the second photograph. This one is a selfie, featuring two kid who he assumes are the teenage versions of the two assassins currently bickering about who owed who a shot from which country and why. But then he looks more closely at it, and notices that there’s a rope ladder the kids are holding onto, and the end of it is visibly off the ground. The background proves even more interesting when he sees a temple...........

looking suspiciously like the one he was studying at at the time........

with a bald, angry-looking man in the background.......

one that looks suspiciously like the younger version of him.......

and this looks an awful lot like a selfie taken by one of the other parties involved in the incident at the temple fifteen years ago............

And Retsu’s brain breaks entirely as he yells, “EXPLAIN THIS IMMEDIATELY!”

“Love, calm down, we’ll explain.”

“It all began fifteen years, with two assassins in training, a mission to a temple, a school in Scotland, and a dare............”

----

THE END!!!!

------

Notes:

(1) Assassins tended to be a tad insane like that, and four years of solitary followed by electrocution only added on the years and years of insanity-inducing torture. It wasn’t like being an assassin was a career he chose, really. It was more like that’s what he had been trained for since he was old enough to remember, and by the time he was old enough to have learned about right and wrong, it was a little late to consider himself on the right side. The fact that he had lived to be 25 while being active in the field was already somewhat of a shocker.

So Doyle’s attraction to Retsu, while somewhat surprising, was significantly not that big of a deal. He always did go for the odd ones; the sword-wielding glitter-covered vigilante he’d shared a kiss with on the roofs of Paris, the guy with a wicked smile and a wickeder way with knives in the Sahara Desert, the woman with needles woven into her braid and a career as a mercenary weren’t exactly conventional lovers or dates, so Retsu could have actually been considered fairly ordinary.

(2) (The fact that Doyle had sneaked into the temple by clinging onto the ceiling, held a 3-hour long conversation with the Great Kaioh on morality and values in combat, and then proceeded to argue with three of the students on whether or not murder was truly bad had somewhat helped their understanding of Retsu’s dilemma.)

(By the time Retsu’s finally come to terms with his feelings, everyone else already knows. Katsumi, Suedo, Katou, and even Doppo Orochi all ask him, with varying degrees of sensitivity, when he will finally ask out the assassin.)

(3)  He had noticed all of the things before, mind you, just didn’t realize how far down those went, putting them as minor habits. It was everything about Doyle, really, when he looked far enough. The sleeping and getting up at impossibly random times of the day, the forgetting to eat unless Retsu sat down with him and forced him to eat, the strange habit of almost never using the door to enter their apartment, the almost impeccable knowledge of languages he shouldn’t have been able to practice, not in his home country or in prison.

(4) The languages used are, as follows: Spanish, French, Arabic, Belarusian, German, Hebrew, Hindi, Irish, Italian, and Spanish again.

(5) Not that Doyle actually knew when that was, but he had managed to get a file or two from a hospital in Scotland, find out the rough week in October, and pick the day he thought was the most likely to be the day of his birth.

(6) The wall is added to for the rest of their lives. Both of them also keep their own notebooks with the same ‘‘i love you’’s written down, just in case.

#retsu x doyle #baki the grappler #grappler baki #asks #mod z answers asks #writing #my writing #drabbles #tw: gore mention #tw: violence mention #tw: alchohol mention #tw: swearing #my laptop is at 7% rn i should go charge now excuse me #also i'm actually very proud of this fic

[lnd64zgj-blog]

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[fatesinthenight]

Bim's Date (part 5)

"Your going to be fine." Amy looks at Mark. He looks down at his lap fiddling with his phone nervous. They are in a car parked outside your house. "I should have done this sooner..." Mark saids sadly.

"I think (Y/N) needed time alone after what happened. They needed space." Amy assures Mark. Mark sigh and looks up at Amy. "But its been five days. What if the damage has already been done and they don't want to hear an apology. Im the last person they want to see. I hurt one of my fans... I never wanted to do that." The day you left Bim called Mark and told him what had happened. Mark felt terrible and he also wanted to be alone, Chica giving him many licks and cuddles to comfort him. Amy came over and Mark said what had happened, she just let him rest his head on her shoulder and told him it wasn't his fault. Even so Mark still made his videos but he put on a front when he was still feeling bad. So Amy got him and told him he should explain to you why the egos were so worried and how you didn't do anything wrong. So there they are infront of your house.

Amy takes Mark's hand. "Mark it doesn't hurt to try. I will go with you. I'm here for you." Amy smiles at Mark. It makes him feel better for a moment. He leans over and gives her a kiss. "Thank you." Mark takes a deep breath. "Lets do this."

You are on your computer. You log onto your YouTube account and scroll through the videos. Then you pause over one that was recommended to you, it was the fist time Bim was introduced in a skit. You linger over it and sigh. After you got home you got home you got five phone calls from Bim. You didn't answer them and went to bed. The second day you got ten phone called and four texts asking to please talk. The third day you got a long text saying how bad he felt about everything and how badly he wanted to make up for it. On the fourth day you got one last phone call but this time he left a voice mail. He said it was his last message and that he was sorry and you can hear the hurt in his voice and he hung up. You never deleted the message and sometimes listened to it, why you didn't know but you did. You felt tears coming in but you shake it off telling yourself it was for the best because you were only causing problems. just then you hear a knock at the door. Your in some pajama bottoms at a t-shirt but you don't care to dress up before you answer and open the door.

"Hi I'm Amy. Are you (Y/N) by any chance?" Amy smiles at you. You just stand there in awe. Amy is at your door... she looks cuter in person. It takes you while to respond. "Ummm yea that me..." You try to act cool. Amy just smiles like a little ray a sunshine. "I know this is very unexpected but he wanted to talk to you." Amy tugs Mark into view where he was standing away from the door. Now your really freaking out on the inside. Mark is at your house standing right infront of you... o shit. " I technically met you already but not really as me. So reintroduction time. Hi I'm Mark it is nice to really meet you (Y/N)." He holds out his hand to you. You feel like your dreaming but when you reach out and shake his hand it feels really. You don't know what to say but all you can muster up is "I like your videos"... smooth.

"umm how do you know where I live?" You realize how the heck did they get to your house. Mark scratches his head. "Well you see I ummm..." He hesitates but then Amy tells you. "I asked Google for it when they others looking into you. Don't worry I asked him not to tell anyone." You think about it for a moment. Well dam I got internet stalked by the egos, Amy, and Mark... when they say senpi notice me this is not what you had in mind. "At this point im not that surprised." You shrug.

"I just wanted to talk you about what happened. I know I had a part in it and I fucked up too. So I want to fully apologize for my part if you will let me." Mark is serious and Amy holds his hand for encouragement. You think to yourself, Mark came here personally to say he is sorry... he really feels bad. "That's fine with me. You can come in." Mark walks in and Amy takes a step back. "O would you look at the time I have a thing to do. An important thing. You guys are good right? Right good! Ok I will get you in like... fifteen minutes ok." Amy kisses Mark's cheek and finger guns her way back to the car and drives off. "So that just happened." You are so confused. Mark just looks out the door in awe. "Clever girl..." After some time processing what happened you both take a seat on the couch.

"I think I should start at the beginning." Mark saids looking at you. "So you know from Bim that the egos don't go out on dates right? Well there is a reason for that. One time someone took an interest in Bim. They were really nice and Bim was happy. They talked a lot and they hung out sometimes. He was very happy until one day they said when they were going to meet me. Bim didn't think much of it and asked me to come over. So I did and met them. They talked to me a lot and ignored Bim the whole time. Then when I told them they were being rude they just said they just wanted to talk to me and getting to Bim as the only way to do it. To make it worse Google found that they were bragging about it. So I made them leave and Bim felt used and hurt because of me..." Mark looks sad but continues. "Soon they decided not to date because of that reason. They didn't want to be used to get to me or just to make some internet popular. I feel bad because they don't get to have that part of being with someone because of me... one fan got hurt once from it and we didn't want it to happen again..."

"Someone got hurt before?" You are surprised, you thought you would have heard about it. "Yea but no one would really know because Dark took care of that. He has his ways and well he wanted to them to be fine." Mark saids. "Wait Dark cared for someone?" Now that was surprising. Mark chuckles. "Yea that's what we all said... but he is full of surprises though."

"What happened if I may ask?" You are very curious about it. "That's a story for another time... also he would kill me if I said it. He was the one that made the rule because of what happened though." Mark saids. "You did nothing wrong (Y/N). I'm sorry for what I did I really am but please don't be mad at Bim. He really cares about you I could tell. Give him a chance please." Mark looks at you waiting for your answer.

 You look at the floor, you understand why they did what they did. It wasn't Bim's fault and he didn't want you to get hurt. Now you understand why they acted the way they did you don't blame them. Then you think of Bim. The first time you saw him in a video he was your favorite ego.  Then after the second time in Markiplier T.V you were happy he came out again. You wished you had his confidence because you were so shy. Then by chance you meet him and you knew it was him and not Mark. The look on his face when you called him by his name, he looked both surprised and so happy. They you got to know him and to you he wasn't just an ego he was his own person. You liked him for who he is and not just because he looked like your favorite YouTuber.

"I forgive you." You tell Mark. "I understand why you all were worried. Im still sorry I caused trouble. But I want you to know I really do like him. Not because he looks like you or that he came from you. Bim is Bim. He is someone else entirely. A confident guy infront of the camera and a showman but also shy to other things. He tries his best all the time and he likes helping others. He loves his plants. He is sweet and sensitive and really shows it and always tried to impress others. Also if you really look closely... his eyes are lighter brown than yours." You smile at that. You remember telling Bim that and he got so shy and said he never noticed that.

Mark smiles. It was the second time someone has talked about one of the egos not just as an ego but as a person. It made him happy. " Yea Bim is Bim. But im still the better looking one." Mark laughs. You laugh too. "Sure Mark. Everyone saids its Dark. Hate to burst your bubble." You say giggling. Mark makes a face. "Why do my fans have to love the evil one..." He sighs.

By then Amy comes back. You go outside to see Mark out. "Thank you. I'm glad we got to talk." You stand there wanting to ask something but think it would be weird. Mark notices. "Did you want to ask something?" He tilts his head. You feel nervous and ask anyway. "Can I have a hug?" Mark laughs and he gives you a huge hug. He lets go and smiles at you. "Now then you need to get back in there and get dressed unless we take you away like that in your pajamas." Mark points at your outfit. "Wait what?" You look at him puzzled.

"We can do this the easy way or the hard way..." Mark tries to sound threatening but you don't take him seriously at all and Amy rolls her eyes. "Sorry we are kidnaping you." Amy saids happily. Now you are being kidnapped by Mark and Amy... how did it come to this.

Willford is in the studio cleaning up. Bim would not leave his room for the past four days after the theater. They gave him his space and they all apologized to him ,not Dark of course, but Bim just wanted to be left alone. It left a dark cloud in the house. The others tried to move on but everytime they all sat down to eat Bim would come in, not talk to anyone, make himself food, and leave back to eat in his room. This day Willford tried to get Bim out by telling him they would do Bim's segment but the door never opened for him. What made it worse was Bim wasn't eating that day. Dr.Iplier left food at Bim's door and checked up on him later to find it untouched. Host tried to talk to him but Bim told him to leave. Ed was close to trying but didn't because he knew Bim wouldn't answer. Silver slid a note under the door saying he missed him but Bim slid it back out. Google stayed away, as much as he wanted to try he knew it wouldn't work, instead he looked up how to cope with someone with a broken heart. Even Yandere's creepy laugh didn't make him look out the room at night, that made Yandere actually disappointed. King of Squirrles would sit by the door and talk to Bim, even knowing he was just talking to himself he thought Bim would like some company. Dark didn't say anything to him, he continued his day normally thinking Bim should have known better.

Willford finishes up and walks out the studio hands in his pockets. he was so used to having Bim around that the past days without him have made him lose his usual pink killer craziness attitude. He would however still fire some rounds at the ceiling in frustration. His phone rings and he doesn't feel like answering it so ignores it, but then it rings again; his ringtone being his own voice saying "poof". He looks at who it is and sees it is Amy, he answers instantly. "Amy hi. What can I do for you missy?"

"Oooo so Amy calls and you answer automatically but when I call you ignore me!!" Mark yells. "Mark please be nice. Willford can you get Bim to come out of his room?" Amy asks. Willford is taken back by that. "Amy I know I'm a man that can do anything but that is something I don't think I can do." Willford saids sadly. "Said the guy that have a gun fight with a baby!" Mark yells at the phone in Amy's hands as he drives, Amy has Will on speaker. "Yea this is different even for me Mark." Will runs his hand through his pink hair. "Please Will its really important." Amy pleads. "Well I think I can do it if you put it that way." Will stands straight and starts walking to Bims room upstairs. "Awwww come on why do you only listen to Amy." Mark asks. Willford answers simply, " Because its Amy." He hangs up and starts going up the stairs.

 Back in the car only ten minutes away you sit in the backseat. "Wow Bim wasn't kidding... You guys do sound like their parents sometimes." Amy laughs " Yea comes off that way sometimes. Im the doting mom and Mark is the dad that no one listens to." Amy pats Marks head playfully as he sulks in his seat knowing how true that statement is.

Bim lays in bed curled up in his covers. He doesn't have the light on and his window is covered so no light comes in. He knows he told you his last message but he stares at his phone wanting to call. Instead he tosses his phone away to the floor and faces the wall. Then a light shines in his room as Willford kicks down his door. "Dark will pay for that later." Willford saids. Bim sits up and looks at Willford. "Will whatever you are doing i'm not up for it... just leave me alone." Bim curls up again and faces the wall. Willford goes to his bed and rips the covers from Bim who is in a t-shirt and pajama bottoms. His hair is messy and his glasses are full of stains from tears. "Bim Trimmer you scamp you need to get up out of bed and look good." Bim sits up and cleans his glasses with his shirt. He sits there looking so tired and miserable.

"What is the point... I don't feel like doing anything. I feel so empty. I never thought I would feel this way. I know the first time it happened I was hurt and just talked to doc about how I felt but this time is different. It feels like I got my heart ripped out. Like I have a void in my chest...It hurts Will.... and I don't know how to fix it.." Bim sulks in his spot. "I wonder if Dark felt this when it happened to him... but he doesn't really have a heart in the first place so he probably didn't care to much. Maybe he was and he hid it from us I don't know."

Will throws Bim some clothes. "Look Bim we all know your feeling hurt but trust me when I say you are going to want to look good for this. It is a request from Amy." Bim holds his suit jacket and looks at Willford, " Amy? Will I don't know if I'm up for a visit even from Amy..."

"Just do it. She said it is important. I will let you get ready." Willford picks up the door he kicked down and tried to put it back in place. Bim sighs and looks at his clothes. He gets up and changes then only pokes his door and it falls over. He hears the doorbell and thinks it must be Amy. He does a attempt to fix his hair and goes downstairs. Bim finds Amy and Mark in the door entrance close together. "Guys I know your trying to cheer me up but I just want to be alone..." Bim saids sadly.

"Not until you talk to your guest." Amy saids smiling. Amy and Mark step aside to reveal you. Bim looks up at you surprised. He stands there frozen. You smile up at him. "Hi Bim. Can we talk?"

#bim trimmer #willford warfstache #silver shepherd #ed edgar #googleplier #dr.iplier #the host #darkiplier #Amy Nelson #markiplier #marks egos #fanfic #story #Bim Trimmer x reader #Bim date

[myseobacklinksplace4561-blog]

SEO AutoPilot Staying Alivethe Battles Of A Service Attempting To Endure.

Thanks to every person who put in the time to respond to my last article. I would certainly like to react to some of the comments, because, well, simply because. Initial thing initially: my AdWords project, as it is set up today, works extremely, effectively. It creates queries, which we develop into paying clients. The typical questions we obtain by means of phone as well as email yields about $3,450 in profits. And my complete AdWords spending is much less than 5 percent of my yearly revenue, which I take into consideration to be acceptable. All of the advice to fiddle with this and also change that and look right into the various other is intriguing, however I might or might not change anything. It ain't broke. I do not have to repair it. I used to run on the material network, however we got substantial numbers of scrap hits that were related to searches for sports seminars and also of course, I understand that I can have cleaned that up with negative keywords, however that's a never-ending task. My total advertisement invest runs around $9,000 a month, or about $108,000 a year. We're on track for $2 million in sales this year, which is where I got the 5 percent of gross number. On to the remarks: Im curious, have you thought about anything year over year in your calculations or anything else various other compared to exactly what your standard has been this set isolated week compared with the previous 40 weeks or so of data that you had put together? Mark Bowers Its an incredibly interesting concern however a pitifully tiny example upon which to also take into consideration writing and also analysis. Bob For the last 24 years, I would get a paper schedule at the start of the year, as well as utilize it to videotape visits as well as likewise make note of incoming telephone calls. I decided at the start of this year that I wanted a much far better document of incoming calls, to see whether any patterns emerged. I established up a spread sheet on Google Docs, with a cell for every day of the year, and shared it with my salesmen so that we can all tape every incoming questions. A great deal of the telephone calls we obtain result in work weeks or months later on. And some of the calls result in truly substantial orders I 'd hate to miss out on one of those due to the fact that I was generating a statistically considerable information set. For something as visual as your item, I miss right down to the image results. I can see several firms tables all at once. Only one little image on page two, surrounded by numerous pictures from your rivals (Franz, hardrox). This is an extremely fascinating comment. It never ever struck me that any individual would shop this way, but it makes excellent feeling for a visually drivened item. We do code our photo data names to try to make them S.E.O. pleasant, but there's just so much you could do with a documents name. This sort of search does not appear to have any type of connection to AdWords. I aren't sure exactly how Google places the pictures they show up. I just attempted a search (" custom meeting tables") which returns my website as both the top paid as well as totally free listings. When I struck the picture tab, we have only one picture in the initial 25, and 5 in the first 200. Possibly Google is missing out on a possibility here why not increase AdWords to the picture results? I 'd happily spend for positioning. I seldom click AdWords results at either the top or side because I recognize Google is going to get paid by just what is typically a little organisation with slim margins ... So if the advertisement appears pertinent to my needs Ill scroll down as well as click the complimentary search results page for the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1fJR2oLT8nY&list=PLddX_cIorQS_Mw7YX8LHMwenOI7OrKo-K exact same business, or perhaps manually enter the business URL as opposed to clicking on the adword link. But Id miss a great deal of companies without the Adword link. MK, New York City Just what do you do if there is no cost-free link from the company getting AdWords? I'm inferring that you click somebody else. I purchased that leading web link so that you would click it if you assumed it would certainly benefit you to do so. My firm was just one of Googles initial advertisers. Regarding two years ago, we cut down our AdWords budget by 80% and simply concentrated on expressions that brought visitors to our buying cart. We were nervous concerning just how Google would certainly respond, but our experiment functioned. Our sales did not decline and also our organic listings did not endure. Steverino Once you obtain to the top of the complimentary lot, you are most likely to remain there, as you will immediately obtain more clicks than the succeeding links. My concept, and my experience backs me up on this, is that the ideal way to move your totally free link up the list is to drive web traffic to it with AdWords as well as reveal Google that people are discovering the web link to be helpful via a great bounce price, time on website and various other metrics that mirror the user experience. Exactly how does an S.E.O.-optimized site displace a site that also has excellent S.E.O.? One recommendation (as a person who buys domain for a living) is that you upgrade to CustomConferenceTables.com as opposed to utilizing the domain with hyphens ... The business that possesses the name w/o hyphens is a very large firm and the cost is economical, particularly considering the items youre marketing and also your existing marketing outlay. Eliot Silver We bought the URL with the hyphens since it was available, as well as my Internet developer assumes that it makes no difference relating to the S.E.O. stamina of the name. I decided not to do the bargain I don't really think that possessing that particular LINK is important, as customconferencetable.com is possessed by a third business, and most of the various other apparent variants are in different hands. I have confidence in my website's web content as well as my sales procedure. UShapedTable.com UShapedTables.com SquareConferenceTable.com CustomBoardroomTable.com CustomBoardroomTables.com All are offered. Get them as well as onward them to the website. John I took the $800 I didn't invest in customconferencetables.com as well as got these instead. I will certainly be forwarding them to the appropriate web pages on our site. Many thanks for the pointer! Paul, like lots of people Ive time out of mind changed to Bing. Have you tried your search terms there? lesle. Because Sept. 1 of this year, I got 4,287 organic brows through from Google and 3,019 brows through from AdWords. Is it possible that Google reduces Bing results in Google Analytics? That would be fairly underhanded, but that is bookkeeping Google Analytics for accuracy? Place your SEM/SEO history into a Shewhart process habits chart (Excel design templates available on the Net). This will certainly put chance control bands around the information and offer some analytic understanding, including cyclicality impacts. It will certainly additionally help separate signal from sound in the outcomes. Mak. I'm not smart enough to do this, but anyone that wishes to attempt it rates to my raw data. When it involves paid ads affecting a business ranking in the natural outcomes, weve constantly felt very highly that there should be no connection between the 2. Google does not utilize your standing as a marketer to affect natural positions. Frederick Vallaeys, Google AdWords Evangelist. Thus speaketh Google. However till Google tells us precisely exactly what variables go right into making organic rankings, I'll have my doubts concerning their brilliant line separation in between AdWords and natural. Enough on this subject (a minimum of for now). Following message: my dropping health and wellness insurance policy costs! Paul Downs founded Paul Downs Cabinetmakers in 1986. It is based outside of Philadelphia.

[lovelettersandeathreats-blog]

i miss him !!

2nd June 2017 11 pm 

By God, we are nearly 1/2 way through with this year and less than 5 months left until I'm finished with my yr12 exams. Things have gotten a lot more steady because we haven't had anything due in the past week. I feel very vulnerable and ‘fuck all’ atm so I don't think I care about revealing private parts of my life. Apart from my photosets, nothing else have gotten notes so I think it’s safe. I’m going to tell myself that any of these thoughts are just me being paranoid.

On Monday there was the English viva exam, which I skipped school for because I didn’t prepare. Turned up the next day and visited my babe of a teacher first thing in the morning. Landed in my ancient classroom and the door open slightly, sparking all these disturbing intrusive thoughts. Recently (in the past few months) I've conditioned myself to just allow these types of thoughts to pass by instead of fighting them and being embarrassed and having a war in my head. This approach is a lot more helpful. Back to the Hamlet viva... so I was very nervous and had nothing to say when he asked me and he said we could do it in period 3. He interviewed me in the deputy principal’s office and there was a strong beam of morning light coming through the top window and shone on his face.  I rambled on and he said it was unstructured but otherwise ‘good'. The first question was what lines of the play did you find the most inspiring, giving me an excuse to read (not even recite) Hamlet’s ‘ what a piece of work is man..’ soliloquy... I do think I was ver expression and on that 30 sec along he could tell I just LOOVE Hamlet. I guess that's the last of High school Shakespeare completed! (Oh no wait there's trials and HSC) viva... so I was very nervous and had nothing to say when he asked me and he said we could do it in period 3. He interviewed me in the deputy principal’s office and there was a strong beam of morning light coming through the top window and shone on his face.  I rambled on and he said it was unstructured but otherwise ‘good'. The first question was what lines of the play did you find the most inspiring, giving me an excuse to read (not even recite) Hamlet’s ‘ what a piece of work is man..’ soliloquy... I do think I was ver expression and on that 30 sec along he could tell I just LOOVE Hamlet. I guess that's the last of High school Shakespeare completed! (Oh no wait there's trials and HSC) 

Today is Saturday and I've been on a break with my boyfriend for about a fortnight. Yes one fortnight without talking to me, I have come so far... This break has been different from other ones. I think I have changed. I’ve stopped pestering my friends. The days feel a lot faster and I don't feel so emotional. I’ve only felt sad when I talk to one of his friends. The reason I started a post for today was that I want to take down the thoughts I have at this moment. Regarding my collapsed friendships and my failing relationship. I’ve become very dependent on my best friend and she’s the only person I message on a daily basis. Whether it’s the first period at school or when I wake up at 1 pm on Saturday morning. She's the only person I feel like who understands me and who I trust with everything in my head. However, as life always works in this way, coincidentally this time where I feel like talking to her the most she has landed herself in her own friendship with a boy. I spam her with messages when I'm curious about where she is and she replies after a few hours. If this were a few months ago i would’ve become terribly paranoid and upset and read it in a very paranoid way, but I of now just accepts it. Time passes fast for me too. I find myself sitting in bed in the dark from 7 pm onwards, not even trying to sleep, just in bed surfing the web, reading, watching youtube, not studying until 2 am in the morn. Lonely isn’t the word I'm looking for to describe how i feel. 

James has exams in the next 3 weeks, his exams will end at the latest 26th/28th of this month. I feel sad thinking about it all, trying to make sense of it all. Whenever I think about it i feel very sad. i don't think I've been truly honest with myself about this relationship. From the bottom of my heart, i don't think that I add to his life in any significantly positive way. I don’t think I'm a very approving girlfriend and i think my emotional outbreaks to everything he does makes me incredibly unsupportive and negative for him. When he is in my life my life just revolves around what he’s doing and i schedule my life around his. When we hang out we just walk around talking about nothing at all that either of us is interested in. Lurking around on Quora, it really is the best platform for relationship advice. Very high IQ and EQ people giving anecdotes in response to others dilemma Qs. In that process, it confirmed how off i found my relationship. I am so immature and i credit all the flaws to my half and not his because I have found him extremely cooperative this whole time. This answer below really hit the nail on the head and I saved it into my personal note documents. 

I know he is happier than normal on this break on me at the moment and i think he will secretly be very happy that i am going to propose a breakup. Sunny told me it’s all about power play and he wants to be the one breaking up with me. I don't have many memories of him but we had a lot of fun in yr9/ early year 10, when he was only in yr10/11. We used to talk every day, all day until very late, about everything and anything. I would screenshot a lot of his responses and send it to the group chat had at that time. I found him so smart and funny and i had never met anyone like him before. He was absolutely perfect. I watched the Ryan Gosling Movie Blue Valentine the other week. I read about it a year or so ago and the reviews and comments that came along with it and i’m happy i watched it later instead of sooner. I think i can see reflections in my shifting mindset and attitudes in the female protagonists’. How you start off and think your partner is the greatest but over time reality kicks in. Gosling’s character has a paragraph and im not going to generalise the attitude of the whole male sex on his statement but i can also see how James thought/ still thinks in this way. Women are more realistic than men. im not going to generalise the attitude of the whole male sex on his statement but i can also see how James thought/ still thinks in this way. Women are more realistic than men, however, i think this isnt the case maybe. Chris is only naive because this is his first relationship. 

I do want to be with James forever. I have expressed countless times to different people that I want him to be the father of my children. I adore him and no one makes me happier than he does. However, i don’t think we should be together at this point in our lives. He is in university and doing a very hard course, studying full time too. Studying is his priority and he should focus on it 100%. This is his first semester and when i did ask him about whether the rest of the 4 years would be like this he replies (I'm getting teary for some reason) very snappily that it is not and it’s only like so because he’s in trouble with his parents or whatever.  

(I WROTE A FEW PARAGRAPHS MORE BUT THE PAGE CRASHED AND I LOST EVERYTHING BUT WAS ABLE TO TAKE A VERY CRAPPY SCREENSHOT OF WHAT I LOST WHERE EVERY WORD IS BLURRY AS FUCK ) 

Had a very bad breakdown last night and ended up downloaded snapchat to text him. I am very disappointed in myself. i want to swallow 40 pills and take a holiday ( that isn’t guaranteed to end) if you know what i mean. I need to be locked up or taken to a fucking sanatorium but im not rich or living in Japan in the 50s like  Naoko. FUCCCCCCK 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlSAXfxWgJ4 

#rant #journal #heartbreak #borderlinefucksyouup #needhelp #wtf?

[gymviralscom]

Women Hit the Gym Before Trump Gets In

Since the election of Donald Trump, martial-arts and defense-training classes are reporting unprecedented spikes in business from women, minorities, and LGBT clients. “>

If the election of Donald Trump has inspired you to take a self-defense class, youre far from alone. In fact people who are thinking exactly like you are already stretching the limits of New York Citys self-defense instruction facilities. In Americas cultural capital, fighting is the new crying.

Gabrielle Rubin has been practicing martial arts for 29 years. For the last nine, shes run a womens self-defense school in Manhattan called Female Awareness Self Defense. My class for this Monday was packed, she says. I usually have packed classes, but between Wednesday and Sunday is the most packed Ive seen in nine years.

Its unbelievable, she adds. Ive never seen anything like this.

After the long, quiet subway ride home from the place people expected to be when they witnessed Hillary Clinton win the presidency Nov. 8, after the days of tears and sleepless nights of speculation over just how difficult a Trump administration could make life for people who arent white and straight and men, a curious trend has emerged among some dejected liberal voters. They have decided to fight. Literally.

In New York and beyond, people concerned that in Donald Trumps America the government and law enforcement wont stand with marginalized groups are flocking to facilities that teach self-defense and fighting techniques. In many cases, demand for training for hand-to-hand combat vastly outpaces facilities ability to provide it.  

New Yorker Lena Afridi, moved by Election Night, attempted to put together a self-defense workshop for people who thought learning self-defense might be a good idea, in light of recent events. The workshop she organized was met with so much demand, she says, that they had to change the workshop into a series. More than a thousand people RSVPd.

At the Center for Anti-Violence Education in Brooklyns Park Slope, Executive Director Tracy Hobson says what shes seen in the last week is the biggest spike in interest in classes since her martial arts-meets-advocacy organizations founding 42 years ago. We saw another uptick in interest after 9/11 We do think its more now than then. The size, the number of calls that were getting.

Hobson says her organization has fielded requests from upstate New York, from North Carolina, from Pennsylvania. In one case, a Muslim-American group requested self-defense training for 7,000 people. Hobson says 300 people RSVPd to a multiweek self-defense and violence de-escalation workshop the organizational periodically offers. Their facility can accommodate 25 at a time.

For the next one, Hobson says, were getting a bigger space.

Patrick Lockton, the director of the Krav Maga Institute in New York, is a bit mystified by the sudden rush at facilities in the city. Traditionally, just before Thanksgiving, its a quiet time of year, he says. Its been the busiest November, especially in the last week. Its been unbelievably busy.

KMI, with branches spread over New York plus an affiliate school in London, is the largest self-defense school in the U.S. He tells The Daily Beast that two days after the election, the number of attendees at an introductory session to learn Krav Maga, a fighting technique originally developed by the Israeli Defense Force, was double what one would normally expect around this time of year. One week later, the introductory session had swelled to triple its normal size. And the demographics of those introductory classes had changed, too. Normally, about 55-60 percent of entering students are men. Since the election, the gender balance has flipped. Lockton cant declare conclusively that current events caused the surge, but he cant think of anything else that might have done it.

Fighting techniques that rely more on aggression and less on defense are seeing an increase in interest as well. Usually each week I get about five or 10 inquiries, says Ren Dreifuss, head coach and head instructor at Radical MMA in New York. And just yesterday, I got 15.

Its huge, he adds. Huge.

Many martial-arts and self-defense schools contacted by The Daily Beast say that women, Muslim Americans, and LGBTQ individuals account for an uncharacteristic portion of the latest barrage. This could be due to increased instances of hate crimes targeting specific groups that happen to typically align with the other side of the aisle than President-elect Trump and his supporters. The FBI recently released statistics that showed a 6 percent increase in hate crimes last year, mostly due to an escalation in incidents against Muslims. Its definitely the level ofI wouldnt say paranoia, but I would say cautiousness, says Dreifuss.

Radical MMA is in the planning stages of putting together a special seminar for members of groups that could be targeted by hate crimes in a cultural climate where the mainstream has deemed the attitude behind them more acceptable. In hate crimes, the patterns of attack can be very different [than non-hate crime attacks], says Dreifuss. If youre a member of the LGBTQ community, youre probably going to be approached by more than one person, its usually two on one or three on one. They triangulate you. They back you into some sort of corner and they bum rush you. They trap you first, they corner you first.

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The number of Muslim-American, LGBTQ, and womens groups that has contacted Brooklyns Center for Anti-Violence Education has far surpassed the facilitys capabilities. Executive Director Tracy Hobson notes theres a desperation in some of their requests. They need self-defense training, and they need it now. The organization has called on per-diem employees to help address their increased needs, but those can only go so far.

In other parts of the country, the cause-effect relationship between President-elect Trumps #MAGA nation and a flocking to self-defense instruction is less cut and dry. For example, in Southfield, Michigan, a middle-class suburb of Detroit, more people than usual have filled classes at Dallo Martial Arts. But Nick Cavellino, who holds the title of Sihing (which loosely translated means big brother in the art) at the facility, says people arent heading his way because theyre worried Donald Trumps minions are going to personally victimize them. Some people are interested in self-defense because of all the riots and stuff, he says.

And in Chicago, Jeff Horvitzs Krav Academy Inc. has seen an increase in membership due to local crimeassaults, robberies, and sexual assaults in gentrified neighborhoods like Wicker Park. Im getting a lot more interesting calls from more women. Im getting more calls from people from India, which is unusual. Im getting calls from women who are joggers and women who work late at night, he says.

Panic over what a Donald Trump administration would actually do to already-marginalized groups isnt confined to New York City, where it seems the masses are unwittingly fashioning themselves into an army of hand-to-hand combat experts.

Amelia Dorn, director of IMPACT Personal Safety of Colorado in Denver, has also noticed a marked acceleration in people interested in enrolling in self-defense classes. Were getting this week as many as wed get in a month or two, she says.

Dorn believes that the elections outcome indicated to many of her students that they cant trust the government to look out for their needs. I think that there is the sense that while the judicial and legal system were less than helpful [to sexual-abuse survivors] a couple weeks ago, now it feels so permissive, it seems to excuse the behavior of misogynists These women feel now that trusting the people in power is not even a choice. Reporting it to the police is not even a choice. If something happens to them, they feel like half the world is going to think that theyre ridiculous and blame them.

For those concerned about Donald Trump, the real battle over the next four years will be fought in the Supreme Court confirmation process, in local and state governments, in Washington backrooms that would be filled with smoke 20 years ago but now are filled with the ghosts of bygone senators flatulence. And a real revolution, if it were to come to that, wouldnt be fought through grappling. So why engage in physical training in the wake of existential trauma?

Southfield, Michigans Nick Cavallino believes theres catharsis in the art of physical engagement. Chicagos Jeff Horvitz says Krav Maga teaches practitioners not to hesitate in responding to violence. Brooklyns Tracy Hobson believes that while self-defense cant defend anybody against the dismantling of the Voting Rights Act, it can encourage people to remain engaged in society as human beings, to leave their houses, to be a part of a world that suddenly feels hostile.

I do think it helps people build their confidence right now, she says. We see this with survivors. Self-defense helps them get their confidence, helps them move in the world with their whole selves. And I think thats not to be underplayed.

Read more: http://www.thedailybeast.com

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