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sleepylixie · 3 years

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A Promise in the Wind

Best Friend! Lee Know & fem! Reader, non-idol! Jisung X fem! Reader

Part of the Heart wants what it wants Anthology

Prompt #40 “They’re gone! just let them go, you’re killing yourself!”

1.3k words, Beware of major character death

This was my entry for last week’s writers’ Room, using one of @decembermoonskz ‘s lines from my ultimate favourite work of hers, Daffodil!! I love you and your works, Izzy moon <3 ( Marked in bolded italics)

“Jesus fuck.”

Minho’s voice had always been like a shot of comfort in the most turbulent of days- but when the curse left his mouth at the sight of you on the couch, you barely even heard it.

Minho’s arm curled around your shoulders almost protectively, almost like he could sense the devastation settled in your bones but you felt numb, the warmth of his touch barely even noticed.

The piece of paper in your hand rustled softly, your grip on it tightening almost unconsciously. Teeth gritted, jaw clenched, staring ahead in a deadened, soulless stare at the wall in front of you-

“He meant everything to me.”

“I know,”

Minho’s voice was quiet, placating, the first tendrils of a still-new grief creeping into his voice. “He meant so much to all of us.”

The coffee table in front of you was strewn with papers, documents and payment receipts, a familiar sight in the last year since…since the incident. Since he’d been taken from all of you.

“He was supposed to be my forever.”

At that, Minho quietened, realizing that his words were barely a ripple against the raging tornado in your brain. No words could fix what you were feeling, make you feel even a fraction better-

“He was supposed to come back to me.”

Minho had never heard your voice like that- ice cold, unfeeling, horrifyingly numb. Not since the night you found out about Jisung.

He would never forget the way you’d shattered into yourself that night, barely a shadow of yourself for the first few days. He had never heard you sob and cry the way you had the night of the funeral. But the day after the funeral, he remembered watching you walk out of his apartment with a glint in your eyes, resolute and vengeful.

“But I’m sitting here with money as compensation, like money will make his absence easier.”

The first tear slid down your cheek, then another and another until you curled in on yourself, hiding your face in your hands. The paper that had been in your hand fluttered to the floor, forgotten and neglected. Minho watched it dance to the ground as he pulled you into his arms, letting you sob brokenly into his chest.

Grief is a fickle slope, and it seemed tonight was one of the nights you slid backwards.

Minho’s lips curled resolutely, jaw clenched in an attempt to keep himself together. He had to be strong for you tonight, the way you had been strong for him before, when the grief felt like too much to handle.

“He didn’t deserve what happened. None of us did.”

“Then why-“ you choked, pulling away from Minho, your eyes bloodshot and nose stuffy, “then why did it happen? Why did he have to leave like this? It’s not fucking fair, Ji it just fucking isn’t-“

You cut yourself off, a fresh wave of tears barrelling down your face, the lump in your throat too painful to speak through.

“It’s never fair, isn’t it...”

Minho’s voice was soft, trembling from his attempt to keep his calm. “He didn’t deserve to leave like that. I didn’t- I didn’t deserve to lose my brother, you didn’t deserve to lose a lover…Not like that…”

His words fizzled out, the only sounds in the apartment your choked weeping and the soft rustle of papers. Minho let you cry into his shirt until you had no more tears to cry, a scratchy voice and damp makeup trails the only remnants.

Minho leaned down to pick up the paper and placed it in your lap, prompting you to pick it up again.

“You won. We won. The bastard that killed him is going to jail for his entire life. It took you a year, but you did it.” He murmured, reading the words on the paper with you again.

You let a small smile take over your face as you scanned the paper, the announcement of your victory in the court of law.

“But he’s still dead, Minho.”

Minho frowned, eyebrows scrunching in an all too familiar way. Your heart wrenched at the sight; Jisung scrunched his nose in the exact same manner when he was confused, a habit he picked up from Minho himself. A bitter laugh escaped your lips at the thought- even after so long, he still lived in your mind.

“Exactly. He’s dead.” Minho bit his lip before continuing, like saying the words out loud still affected him.

“He’s gone, it’s time you let go. You’re killing yourself. You’ve been holding on for so long.”

You sniffled quietly, turning to Minho. He held your gaze, warm and familiar despite the bone-deep tiredness emanating from him. Your twin flame, your best friend from childhood until however long your paths intertwined. He had moved into your apartment within weeks of the funeral, partly to assuage your guilt and partly to assuage his pain.

The memories came rushing back to you, vivid and clear. Turning away from the sniffles coming from his bedroom, trying hard to give him the privacy he needed to grieve his brother, greeting him with ice americanos after particularly bad nights, curling up in his lap when the pressure of it all became too much to handle…

“We both have, haven’t we.”

“Hello my love.”

You thought you’d be a blubbering mess, all tears and silent sobs but you were strangely calm when you stopped in front of the grave. The sharp chill of the early morning numbed your cheeks, but the stinging feeling was almost welcome to you. A bouquet of blood-red roses and snow-white lilies lay cradled in your hands- his favourite kind of flowers to bring you, from childhood until…

Han Jisung. Loved and will be loved, forever and always.

Kneeling in front of the grave, you laid the bouquet gently next to the headstone, the dark red and soft white offsetting the grey stone.

“I thought I should be the one to bring flowers for once.” You laughed faintly, tracing one of the soft petals before standing up.

“I’m sorry I never visited you all these months.”

“I thought it was my fault, back then. I still think so. If it wasn’t for that fight, you’d have never left the house. I felt like I didn’t deserve to see you, not until I…I, well, atoned for what I did to you.

“I considered following you after, you know? You and Minho are all I’ve known my whole life and to lose you like that…I really felt like I had nothing to look for in my future. Nothing, but a broken heart and a life of memories that almost felt too painful to remember. You’d probably whack me on the head for thinking stupid thoughts like that, wouldn’t you?”

A watery chuckle escaped your lips, a lone tear streaking its way down your cheek.

“Minho told me I was killing myself by holding on to you. He’s so much more mature now, you wouldn’t believe how insightful he’s become- but don’t worry, he’s still a little shit who’ll sell his soul for enough ice americanos and cats.

“I didn’t realize how right he was until he said it out loud. Between getting vengeance for you and putting that drunk driver in jail, I forgot to live for myself. You wouldn’t have wanted that for me, no matter where you are…right?"

You sucked in a deep breath, the cold morning air clearing your lungs.

"After the last year of holding on to you and hoping against hope that you'd come back to me, yesterday made me realise that there's never been any way I could wish you back.

“So I’m going to lay you to rest, my love. Today and for all my days, until I can go to you again. I’ll live for myself starting today, just like you would have wanted. That’s my promise to you.”

A warm breeze rustled your hair, at odds with the chill on your cheeks- and all at once, you felt at peace.

I am sorry for this hard angst disaster. T_T. Requests are open for this collection, so do check out the Masterlist for the prompts and rules! Love, Elliana.

Tagging: @decembermoonskz @aliceu @lavenderbexlatte @straykidsownmysoul @soya-zz @fylithia @stellarmonsterr @cotccotc @luminois @blueprint-han @moonlight-hyunjae @jl-micasea @cuokka @popisdead @kisskissbanggang @sungieshines @bearseungmin

Network Tags: @districtninewriters @inkidz @angstyskzclub @kpopscape

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cinnamon-bebe · 4 years

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The Bridge - Part II

The Bridge - Part I

Summary: Two ex-lovers find their paths crossing once again - continuation from Part I - Sebastian and reader reacquaint themselves in each other’s lives again, much to the reluctance of Y/N.

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Warning: Angst

(Sorry for the delay! It’s been so incredibly busy lately!)

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“Roamer of the Cretaceous period, the ‘Tyrant Lizard King’, Tyrannosaurus Rex was one of the most fearsome predators on the planet. Boasting a set of 50-60 banana sized teeth, these carnivores were-”

Sebastian and Y/N stood in awe of the animatronics in front of them. A T-Rex on prehistoric land, turning its head every so often and roaring unexpectedly, to give the startled kids a fright. Occasionally the sound of an adult shriek could be heard, followed by a simmering wave of snickering among the crowd.

“Woah, careful guys.” Sebastian bends down, protectively guarding the small group of children in front of him. A bunch of teenage boys had managed to push their way to the front, boisterously cackling and climbing on the railings to take pictures with the dinosaur. Defeated, the little kids retreat back to their parents as the boys continue with their shenanigans, with just one child standing defiantly.

“Hmph! Not fair!” She stomps her feet.

Recognising the little tot, Y/N bends down to poke her on the shoulders.

“Did you run away from your mama again missy?”

“Dinosaur lady! Caweey me again. I wanna see!” Izzy jumps up and down, her curly hair bouncing on her shoulders.

“Who’s this?” Sebastian whispers.

“My friend.” Y/N smiles before turning back to the girl. “I don’t think you should be running off like this, your mummy is going to be worried again.”

“My mama has to look after my baba sister, she can’t push the swoller here so she wait at the back for me.” Izzy points to her mother sitting on the visitor benches, cradling and cooing the bundle in her arms.

Clearing his throat, Sebastian decides it’s only polite to introduce himself to Y/N’s friend. He bends down to her level and extends his hand to her. “Hello dino lady’s friend. My name is Sebastian, what is your name?”

Izzy stares at him with suspicion, eyeing the strange man up and down before determining him to be a enough decent character and accepts his handshake with a beaming smile.

“Izzy!”

“Well hello Izzy, would you like to see the dinosaur?” Sebastian opens his arms but before he could say anymore, he finds them already full with the excited little girl who had leapt into them.

“Are you scared?” He whispers to the grinning child who shakes her head.

Y/N watches as the new friends become quickly acquainted, Izzy’s pitchy giggles erupting every time Sebastian says something funny. Both of them gasping as the T-Rex opens its mouth to roar, with Sebastian clutching his heart for added drama.

What a man child. Yet even so Y/N can’t help but laugh along with their silliness. To a bystander, they seem to be an idyllic little family spending a Sunday afternoon out at the museum. Mom, Dad and daughter. A modern day Norman Rockwell painting.

A passerby awes as she makes her way past the trio, to which Sebastian turns his head, smiling with unexpected pride whilst holding an oblivious Izzy who is still marvelling at the dinosaur.

“Psst! Dinosaur lady.” Izzy curls her finger at Y/N, bidding her to come closer so she could reach her ear.

“Hm?”

“Is Sebashon your boyfren?” She whispers, not so quietly.

Y/N looks at Sebastian, who returns the same uncomfortable expression on her face. The realisation of how bizarre this whole situation is quickly unravels before her. What is she doing playing happy families with her ex and some stranger’s kid? Has she stumbled upon some sort of alternate universe?

“No Izzy. Sebastian is…he’s just someone I used know.” Y/N smiles, purposely looking at him as she uttered every syllable. Fearing he has mistaken her goodwill for something beyond what it is, she needed to draw the line and clarify to him and herself, that this…meant nothing.

Sebastian doesn’t say anything, instead he clears his throat and turns his attention back to the child in his arms.

“Come Izzy, I think your mommy want to see you.” He tells the girl before carrying her back to her mother, leaving Y/N to stand alone.

Y/N inhales deeply, what is this feeling inside her chest?

Regret?

No, it can’t be. Regret implies that she didn’t mean what she had said but how could that be true? She doesn’t love Sebastian, not anymore. She had moved out the city, stopped seeing her old friends, all for fear that she might bump into him again. If there is regret, it would only be because she allowed him to run her out of her own life. If anything, that feeling inside her should be anger.

Resentment.

She curses herself for not turning a blind eye on the bridge. Who did she think she was kidding? Did she really think she could be diplomatic with Sebastian, act like they could be friends?

She watches as he talks to Izzy’s mother, who has obviously just realised who he is. Embarrassed that her audacious daughter had managed make a Hollywood movie star her personal nanny, she apologises profusely, trying her best to pry Izzy off of him; her little hands still grasping tightly onto Sebastian’s shirt. The exchange lasts for only a few short moments before Sebastian makes his way back to Y/N.

“Izzy says to tell dinosaur lady that she’ll miss her.” He reports back.

Y/N smiles, giving the little girl a final wave before she is led out the room.

“So, shall we continue?” Sebastian resumes.

“Actually, I think I should go.” Y/N grapples with the strap of her handbag uncomfortably. “There’s still some other stuff I want to do and it’s way into the afternoon now.”

“Well how about we grab a coffee before you go?” Sebastian interjects before she could slip past him.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Hey, it’s just one coffee. After that, you can pretend I don’t exist again.” Sebastian chuckles disingenuously.

Y/N continues fiddling with her bag, looking everywhere but him. The exit seems so close, she could just make a run for it.

“Just a quick one.” She gives in, figuring it’s better to get it over and done with than make a scene in the middle of a museum. The downside of knowing a celebrity is that there’s always someone watching.

“Okay.” Sebastian inhales uneasily, gesturing Y/N to the stairs towards the cafe.

———————————————————————————————————–

The museum cafe was unusually quiet for a Sunday afternoon. A small family occupying the larger table, with a smattering of both young and old couples dotted around the room; their chattering low enough to still hear the gentle pop song playing on the radio.

“A flat white for you and an Americano for me.” Sebastian places the drinks on their table, as Y/N types away on her phone.

“Thanks.” She smiles half-heartedly as she places her mobile back in her bag.

“So how long were you staying with Tara?” Sebastian quickly dives in.

“Just a few days, I hadn’t seen her for so long.”

“You know, she’s always telling me how much she misses you. Why don’t you come back more often?”

Y/N doesn’t respond, taking a large sip of her coffee as she stares out the window. She could feel Sebastian’s eyes on her but she’d rather pay attention to the traffic of visitors outside.

“Are you going to be back anytime soon?” He continues.

“I don’t know.” Y/N finally turns her head back to Sebastian, who still hasn’t touched his drink. “There’s so much going on at work and I’ve got a life now in Chicago. I don’t know when I’ll find the time.”

“Oh.”

A long silence ensues. Sebastian absent-mindedly rubs his thumb against the porcelain ear of his mug, a million thoughts rushing through his head.

“Are you okay?” Y/N mirrors his actions, gently chewing on her lip as she holds down the festering nerves inside her.

“Chicago huh?”

“Yeah.”

“You uh…you always did loved Chicago.” Sebastian smiles. “Do you remember that trip we took there for your birthday? It snowed so heavily when we arrived, we were trapped in our hotel the whole night.”

“Yeah, and we ordered room service and played black jack?”

“You mean I ordered room service and you ate those 7 packs of instant ramen you smuggled into your suitcase?” Sebastian teased.

“Well unlike some people, I like to travel prepared.” Y/N scoffs, masking her gentle titter behind her cup.

“Do you know what my favourite part of that trip was though? That day we went ice-skating and you pushed me and I ended up skidding and knocking over that old couple on the rink.”

“Sebastian that’s awful! You hit them so hard!”

“Well if you hadn’t pushed me!”

“I did not. That was all you. You do one Tonya Harding movie and suddenly you think you’re a pro! I can’t believe that’s your favourite memory.”

“Well if that didn’t happen, I wouldn’t have had you nursing me back to health all night.”

“Yes, piggy backing you back to hotel was so romantic.” Y/N rolls her eyes. “We missed all the reservations we had planned and I was stuck massaging your ankle.”

A solemn smile graces Sebastian’s face. “You always knew how to look after me. Even when I didn’t deserve it.”

The comment causes Y/N to look away. Her eyes retreating back to the cafe window, as she leans back into her chair, reinstating the distance between them.

“I’ve really missed you.” Sebastian continues. “Y/N?” He reaches for her hand but she pulls away defensively.

“Wh-what are you doing?” Frustration escaping through the cracks of her voice.

“I just want to talk.”

“No. No we are done talking. I should have never said yes to this. You think you can just buy me coffee, remind me of all the good times and then…and then all our problems will magically disappear?” Becoming mindful of the people around them, Y/N attempts to reign in her volume. “Do you know how hard this last year has been for me?”

“You think it’s been easy for me?” Sebastian fights back. “You don’t think, that I don’t think about you every day, every second since you left?”

“Oh poor Sebastian.” Y/N mocks.

“I tried looking for you. I tried calling. I tried doing everything to find you, to tell you how sorry I am. You wanted me to never see Kaitlyn again? Done. I’ve cut off all contact with her, I’ve deleted her number. Not once has she crossed my mind since you left because the only person that matters is you.”

“You still don’t get it do you?” A single tear trickles down Y/N’s face. “All I wanted was to feel needed, to feel wanted by you.” She pauses, her heart breaking all over again. “I don’t know when the pin finally dropped but suddenly, you just didn’t see me anymore. I was just a person you came home to. Your "I love you’s” became an obligation. It took me a while but I know now that, Kaitlyn was just a way out for us. She a way out for you.“

"Y/N, don’t. That’s not true.” Sebastian could no longer bare looking at her. The same cowardice that held him hostage that night, turning the corner to haunt him once more.

“I know you loved me but we got complacent. That was always your biggest fear.” Slowly draping her bag onto her shoulder, Y/N finally rises to her feet. Looking down at Sebastian, who still refuses to meet her eyes, even for the last time. “I need you to move on. Go enjoy your life, do the things you want and…find someone that makes you happy.”

“And what will you do?” He finally finds the courage to whisper those words. His head remaining low, his body too defeated to find the strength to stop her from leaving. It’s what she wanted, he has no right to inconvenient her any longer.

Reaching out to rest her hand on Sebastian’s shoulder, Y/N recoils before he notices. She stares out at the window again, watching the people come and go obliviously, silently, contentedly.

“I’ll…live my life and I’ll be happy, whatever that may mean.”

Composing herself, Y/N wipes away the traces of tears on her face, ready to brave the outside world again. A world without him.

Is this what closure feels like? She questions.

“Bye Sebastian.” She mouths, her voice so low that she isn’t sure whether he picked it up. But it doesn’t matter.

Bye.

That word doesn’t even register in Sebastian’s head anymore as she disappears past him. His mind occupied by the statements still ringing in his ears. Too busy trying to run through every memory they shared over the past three years.

Is it all true?

Y/N was right about one thing. Sebastian’s greatest fear was that they’d become too comfortable in their relationship. To the point that everything the other person did, no longer bore the same novelty. To the point that their every action became a nuisance and eventually, they’d grow to resent each other.

He admits that their relationship was far from perfect and perhaps it did hit a point of stagnation. The more successful he became, the less time he spent at home and when he was there, his mind was somewhere else thinking about another project on the horizon. All those times, he’d walk past Y/N with his nose in a script. All those times, he’d usher her away because he was taking an 'important’ phone call. It all seems so trivial now.

He relegated her to a place where she felt she didn’t matter to him anymore, when that could be farther from the truth. Fame and fortune took its toll. The pressures of being a working actor and the fear of failure was something he couldn’t communicate to Y/N about. Maybe Kaitlyn was just an excuse for him to escape all that.

He loved Y/N more than anything in this world.

And he still loves her.

________________________________________________________________

Staring out into the city lights, Y/N rests her arms over the bridge. Suddenly New York sounds so quiet. Peaceful. If that were even possible.

She is one of a few on the bridge. The others, a street merchant behind her, selling handmade jewellery since the day started, and a handful of commuters walking sluggishly to the station ready to go home. A parallel to the bustling scene this morning.

The sky pitch black, not a star in sight but the moon, otherworldly; illuminating and watching over the city and its people.

Y/N closes her eyes, comforted by the quiet breeze blowing kindly against her skin. Clutching her chest, she begs for the incessant aching to cease. If New York can find peace, why can’t she?

Her flight leaves early tomorrow morning, yet she finds every excuse to stay just a little longer.“A few more minutes, let me take in the city for just a few more minutes.” She tells herself. After today, she plans to steer clear of this city for as long as needed; until she can disassociate New York from him.

Y/N turns around to the soft touch on her arm.

“Hello miss, I’m sorry to interrupt. I’m selling a collection of some very beautiful and one of a kind jewellery that I personally hand crafted myself. Would you care to have a look?” The middle aged woman smiles earnestly, her eyes tired and her blonde hair slightly dishevelled from the day.

“I’m fine thank you.”

“Please, you might find something you really like! They would make the perfect gift for a loved one, I have pieces for men and for women. I have rings, necklaces, earrings…” The merchant begins to take out several bracelets from her pocket to demonstrate against Y/N’s wrist, which she reluctantly abides to. “In fact, if you come to my stall you’ll see I’ve recently created this gorgeous line of ruby jewellery, just right for a beautiful woman like you. That gentlemen over there just picked up one of my favourite pieces.”

Y/N looks up in the direction to which the woman points.

“Sir! Wouldn’t you recommend my work to this beautiful young woman here? It’s well worth your money isn’t it?” She shouts to the man standing behind them.

“Yeah…they’re very lovely.” He clears his throat, his eyes focusing solely on Y/N. “Could you excuse us for a moment?”

Y/N attempts to hurry past the confused the woman before Sebastian grabs hold of her hand. The woman watches with her mouth slightly agape, unsure whether she should intervene.

“No no, it’s okay. We know each other.” Sebastian reassures the street merchant, who nods slowly and returns to her stall. She watches the couple closely, alert in case she needs to call for help.

“Let go.” Y/N tries to pry his hands off her wrist.

“Not until you hear me out.”

“Let go now or I’ll scream.”

“No. You’ve said your piece, don’t you think I deserve the same opportunity?” Sebastian pulls her closer, forcing her to look at him.

Y/N’s struggles against him weakens, she glances at the woman watching them and quickly looks away embarrassed that this was all being played out in public. “What more could you possibly say?”

“You have every right to hate me.”

“Ha!” Y/N laughs sardonically. She decides to stop her efforts to rid Sebastian’s grip on her. She’ll allow him to finish and if needed, kick her way off this bridge if she has to.

“I was never caring enough, considerate enough.” He continues. “I thought my success would make up for everything else I was lacking and by doing that, I didn’t realise how far I pushed you away.”

Y/N turns her head from him, choosing to look over the bridge and into the city instead.

“There was never a second in those three years that I didn’t love you. Even now, I don’t think I can properly compute just how much I still do. You’re the only woman I do see and you’re the only woman who sees me…You mean more to me than you will ever know and the only thing that scares me now, is that you’ll leave here thinking otherwise.” Sebastian releases his hold on her, allowing Y/N to stand willingly by herself.

With her head still turned, Sebastian can see the tears quietly falling against her cheek.

“Y/N?” Sebastian pulls her into his chest, holding her head gently his hand.

“I can’t do this again.” Y/N cries.

“And you won’t. I won’t let this happen to us again. If it means my career taking a backseat, if it means I start taking on the little projects so I can be with you. So be it.”

“No. I don’t want that.” Y/N pulls away, finally looking at him. Sebastian’s gently cups her blushed cheeks, his thumb wiping away her tears which were still escaping her eyes. “I don’t want you to sacrifice doing the things you love.”

“Then what? You tell me and I’ll do it.” Sebastian whispers.

“I don’t know…talk to me? Share things with me? I don’t want us to be strangers.”

“We won’t. I promise. I have so much I’ve wanted to tell you but have just been too scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“That…you’ll see just how weak I really am.”

“Sebastian.” Y/N blinks back her tears so that she could finally see him more clearly. “You’re not weak. Just stupid.”

Sebastian smiles.

“I know how much you worry about your career and finding your place in the industry but no matter what happens, even if you lose all your money and your fame. It will never change my opinion of you. I fell in love with you, not the fancy actor.”

“I know.” Sebastian gazes down at Y/N. In this moment he cannot figure out why he ever doubted that. He lowers his head, tenderly placing a soft and longing kiss on Y/N’s lips. Her kiss, her scent even more perfect than he had remembered. Pulling away, he rests his forehead against hers. “So, are you still going back to Chicago?”

“I don’t know.” Y/N sighs.

Entwining his fingers into hers, Sebastian slowly leads her away from the side of the bridge.“You can make that decision tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Y/N rests her head against his arm. Finally feeling the peace that she had sought long and hard for, she no longer needs the breeze to bring her comfort. She has found her peace, which always remained with Sebastian. She allows herself to be guided by him, holding her tightly next to him.

They both wave to the street merchant, as they leave. Her genuine smile sending them her deepest blessings as they disappear from sight.

“So what did you buy from that lady?” Y/N enquires curiously.

“It’s a gift.” Sebastian smiles to himself. His finger inside his pocket, circling the Ruby band.

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan x reader #fanfic #marvel #imagines #not my gifs #Bucky Barnes #chris evans #anthony mackie #the bridge part 2

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ohsnapitzlovehacker · 5 years

Text

I Spy AU (Ride or Die)

Izzy wants to avenge her mother. Colt wants answers for his father. A common goal might unite them both.

*these characters belong to Choices game from Pixelberry, not me!*

Prologue

Part 1 - Like Mother, Like Daughter

Part 2 - Trouble is a Friend of Mine

Part 3 - Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing

Part 4 - Two Truths and a Lie

Part 5 - Only the Good Die Young

Part 6 - Not Your Enemy

Part 7 - Nori Sato

Part 8 - Heating Up

Part 9 - This Is Just the Beginning (nsfw)

Part 10 - Lover’s Interlude

Part 11 - This is Goodbye

Word count: 2,288

COLT (moments prior)

“Go around the back” Izzy gestured as she leaped from the car. Was she crazy? “Why? What are you planning?” Izzy was almost to the opened door, but Colt soon caught up, almost running into her. Her back was straight as a rod. “Go around back,” she stressed, turning to look at him in the weak light. “I’m gonna need backup.” He knew exactly what Izzy was capable of, and it did nothing to quell his fears of whatever was in the house that she wanted so damn bad to face. He also knew she wouldn’t go down without a fight, and was probably just as stubborn as he was. He nodded and watched as Izzy continued her careful trek towards the house. The crickets and other noisy insects of the night were all Colt could hear until movement in his peripheral caught his attention. Colt assumed a defensive position instantly. “Show yourself, I know you’re fucking there!” he snarled, and the trespasser stepped forward, their sure, careful walk coming into focus until they were less than a few feet away.

Colt’s jaw dropped and his arms came down as he stared in disbelief. Anger, misery, and pain, things he hadn’t let surface for years suddenly became the only things he felt. “...Pop.” Colt almost stood as tall as his father, and the passing years had aged them both. The man looked just as surprised to see Colt. Even in the growing darkness, Colt could make out the familiar tattoos, shoulder-length dark hair, and his eyes pricked with angry tears. “You shouldn’t be here Colt,” were the first words Kaneko spoke after years of silence. Colt hardly had time to sort through his reunion with his missing father before he remembered Izzy in the house, alone. He took off running, his sole focus on getting to her. Why the fuck had he let her go in alone? Colt stumbled into the living room to find Izzy weakly fighting off her assailant, a tall man with a red beard, his arm tightening around her throat.

“Izzy!”

She slumped in his iron grip and Red Beard let her hit the floor with a wet thump. He looked up, leering at Colt as recognition shone in his eyes. “Aren’t you a little old for Bring Your Kid to Work Day?” The stupid joke didn’t register and Colt could taste his own rage, visceral on his tongue. Anger at his father for showing up out of the blue and anger at the stranger who was responsible for Izzy’s current condition. Crossing the room in quick strides, Colt reeled his fist back, his blow landing right where he wanted it to. Red Beard stumbled back, holding his bloody nose as he glared, his own aggression flaring. But Colt didn’t give him a chance to retaliate, dealing punch after punch to Red Beard’s gut, ribs, jaw, anywhere he could reach. Red took a cheap shot at Colt’s knee causing him to stumble, then his fist connected with Colt’s cheek.

“Enough, Drew!” Kaneko’s voice had enough power and possibly the fear of God to stop Drew, but Colt took that moment of hesitation to land another devastating blow to his eye socket. Drew fell back, hitting his head against the coffee table, bleeding from the cut on his head and onto the carpet. He didn’t move, but his labored breathing told Colt he was unfortunately still alive. Colt’s hand throbbed, his ears rang from getting punched in the face and there were countless nicks and small bruises he’d discover later, but his sole concern was Izzy. He dropped to the ground beside her, cradling her head under his arm. She groaned, reaching for her throat but Colt took her hand in his free one, brushing a kiss to her weak fingers. Izzy’s lips fell into a strained smile as she gazed up at Colt, but it slipped as something else caught her attention. Her eyes widened and Colt looked back to find his father studying them, disapproving of the scene. That was enough to send Colt into another fit of rage. “Start fucking explaining and don’t leave anything out,” Colt seethed, meeting his father’s hooded gaze. He knew Kaneko wasn’t an honorable man, and until Izzy’s life had been in immediate danger, he hadn’t cared. “The Brotherhood sent you here, didn’t they?” Colt recalled the woman at the Cuban cafe and cursed himself for not saying anything to Izzy. He couldn’t connect the two, but she must have had something to do with the ambush.

“If you know what’s good for you, you will listen to me--” Colt shook his head, a humorless laugh bubbling to his lips as he cradled Izzy. There was no way he was letting her out of his sight again. “You’ve been gone for five years, and now you wanna be my dad? Pop, that ship sailed a long time ago. Hell, you might have better luck with Logan. He’ll forgive anyone.” Hurt flashed in Kaneko's eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it came. He pointed to Izzy. “She’s trouble, son. You deserve a chance...to not be bound by my mistakes.” Izzy attempted a sitting position, now leaning against Colt’s shoulder as she tried to focus on Kaneko. “I’m trouble? What, were you sent here to kill me?” Izzy demanded them grimaced, her hand reaching to soothe her bruised throat. “I warned your mother for being so damn idiotic! Do you have a death wish as well?” Kaneko thundered. “Her partner killed her and he’ll kill you too! I will not lose my son because of an ill-timed infatuation.” Colt shook with anger, missing how Izzy’s disoriented expression hardened to steel.

“...Don’t you dare talk to her like that,” Colt hissed, at a stand-off with the man he’d been so desperate to find. “You were there when she died?” Izzy asked evenly. Kaneko looked past Colt to narrow his eyes at Izzy. “I was there when she foolishly joined the Brotherhood, and I was there at the funeral,” Kaneko glared, but the lines in his tired face sagged when he glanced back at Colt. “I was forbidden from ever seeing my son again, lest he found the same fate. Colt, I never wanted to stay away. I just wanted you to have a chance to live.” Colt had suspected The Brotherhood’s dealings with CAE-I, but the feeling of being right rang hollow. Colt didn’t know much about Kira Parker, but he wondered what exactly would entice her to cross over and leave Izzy behind. What dark motivation would meet or exceed his own father’s? What means would justify the ends?

“Why should I believe anything you say? You don’t deserve to call yourself a CAE-I agent,” Izzy spat, but Kaneko wasn’t offended. “You are but a child who’s managed to drag my son into your foolish troubles.” Kaneko’s eyes lingered on the hickies and love marks across Izzy’s uncovered skin, noticeably different from her attacker’s.

“I don’t want your protection!” Colt shouted. “Just say you get off on the blood and murder and move on! Christ, you’re just like mom! Reliving your glory days to obtain some stupid high. Cars weren’t enough for you, old man?” Kaneko’s face was stone. He stepped closer to Izzy, but Colt moved to shield her. “I don’t expect you to understand,” Kaneko sighed as if he was talking to a deviant ten-year-old and not the taller and extremely hostile young man before him. Once upon a time, Colt had sought out Kaneko’s approval. Not anymore. “Do whatever the fuck you gotta do. Report to your superiors, take that with you,” he pointed to Drew who still lay unconscious, “and we’ll get out of your hair.” Izzy gripped his shoulder, now standing, and pulled Colt so he looked at her. “What!” But Colt yanked himself from Izzy’s grip to glare at his father. Kaneko said nothing, expression closed off, and Izzy looked from the two men in disbelief.

IZZY

Colt walked her back into the bedrooms to retrieve her things and anything he’d left lying around as well. He wouldn’t leave her alone with Kaneko, and rather than finding it a sweet gesture, her anger flared as hot and intense as Colt’s own. “We can’t stay here. Safehouse? Ha! That’s rich,” Colt muttered as he threw clothes in his bag and hastily zipped it up. “He fucking thinks he was protecting me? No, he was saving his own skin. I can’t believe Logan was right, motherfucker!” His injured hand smashed into the wall, opening up the scab as Izzy stared at him in disbelief. “Colt, if you don’t get a grip and calm the hell down,” Izzy began sternly, but Colt was on a tirade, pushing past her to stomp into the bathroom next. “You know you can’t go back, right? Jason’ll be waiting for you,” Colt talked over his shoulder as he swept their toothbrushes and other toiletries into the plastic bag he’d uncovered from Izzy’s things.

“What, so I’m supposed to just fly off the radar and lay low for the rest of my life?” Izzy stepped in front of Colt so he had no choice but to look at her. “That’s not the worst idea you’ve had,” Colt snapped, but Izzy held firm.

“I’m not running away, Colt!”

“And I’m not losing you!” Past the fire that blazed in his eyes, Izzy caught a glimpse of the fear he kept at bay. Fear for her. “This is my mission. This is my life,” Izzy whispered, cupping his cheek with her hand.

“This is a death sentence,” Colt argued, but his voice was softer too. Izzy’s eyes glistened, and she looked away, her voice short and clipped. “All the training in the world doesn’t make you invincible to death.” She thought of her mother. There was even more to the story, there had to be. “No, but it sure as hell increases your chances,” Colt muttered, tracing the outline of her lips with his thumb. It was swollen but his touch was feather-light. “Izzy, I love you.” The words were out and spoken so quickly Izzy thought she imagined them. She was an agent and he was the legacy kid of a career criminal and Brotherhood member so it couldn’t have worked out for them. He shouldn’t have been in love with her. But he was. She could see the truth in his dark eyes.

“No you don’t,” Izzy said, sharply pulling away but Colt wouldn’t let her. Suddenly she couldn’t face him. “I love you, even if you don’t say it. Even if you don’t feel it,” Colt pressed, but Izzy yanked her hand away, running from him. She almost hit the wall around the corner and braced her arms for impact. She felt Colt’s presence behind her, and her face crumpled as her hands gathered into fists against the wall. “Don’t say things like that!” she swallowed the sob in her throat. She should have never brought Colt along. His dad was only doing what any caring father would; protecting his son. And suddenly Izzy wondered if that was what her mother was doing in her own misguided way. “I can’t be the thing that comes between you and your dad,” Izzy talked to the wall as Colt rubbed her arms in soothing motions. “He made his decision, and I’m making mine. Izzy, blood isn’t thicker than water, not by a long shot.” He pressed a kiss to her ear and Izzy couldn’t shake the fact that he was making the wrong decision. She did love him, the feeling had crept up on her too. But she’d have to be the one to save him from himself. CAE-I may have suffered corruption, but Izzy had taken an oath. Should death take her, she’d be ready. She blinked back the tears and turned to allow Colt’s strong arms to pull her towards him. It felt like a lifetime since they’d been intimate, yet his arms still felt like the safest place to be.

When the two emerged from the back rooms to reenter the living room, both Kaneko and Drew were gone. They packed up the Honda, Colt teasing her for taking out the trash and attempting to clean up the dried blood. They found a hotel, checking in for the night. Izzy dressed his wounds as best she could, but it was a lost cause as Colt took her to bed and aggravated his injuries and reopened his bruises. Yet Izzy refused to tell him no. She wouldn’t deny him anything for that last night together. Each thrust, each kiss, each touch, Izzy took in stride, committing his scent, his feel, his taste to memory. When he’d drifted off to sleep, Izzy quietly dressed and grabbed her things. She slipped out of the hotel room, leaving the rental keys and hotel key card on the entertainment stand with a three worded note and her beating, broken heart.

It was almost six in the morning, and Izzy dug in her bag for one of her unused burner phones. Pulling it out, she dialed the number she’d committed to heart as a bright-eyed, fearless five years old. The line went to voicemail as Izzy expected, and she waited for the prompt and resounding beep before she left her message. “Hey, Dad? It’s Izzy. I just wanted to let you know that I love you so damn much. I don’t say it much, and I never said it enough when Mom was alive. So, once more for emphasis?” Izzy laughed as she teared up in the hotel parking lot, waiting for her Lyft. “I love you, Dad.”

#playchoices #playchoices fanfiction #espionage au #choices rod #colt kaneko x izzy parker #colt kaneko x mc #colt kaneko #would you like some angst with your fluff???#or some fluff with your smut???

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karaell · 5 years

Text

How to save a heart

Alec was walking back from his meeting with Asmodeus on shaky legs. The adrenaline was wearing off and the reality of the situation was becoming clearer with every step.

He agreed to break up with Magnus, he agreed to an impossible deal and now he didn't know if he can go through with it.

Is he strong enough to put his own feelings aside and save his boyfriend, the love of his life from this suffering? A small part of his brain, the one which was usually right and which he often ignored was telling him that breaking Magnus' heart was the worst possible way out of this situation, that his boyfriend already lost too much because of Alec himself. But the part that was being consumed by guilt was quickly winning the battle. Because Alec felt guilt more than anything else. It was his fault that Magnus was without magic, his fault that he almost died, his fault that Magnus was sinking deeper and deeper into depression, because Alec was selfish and to cought up in his own wishes and desires to actually see his boyfriend see his pain and sacrifice.

That's over now. Gaining more steadiness in his step Alec makes a decision, he will sacrifice his heart, he will make sure that Magnus is happy again, that he feels like himself again. And despite the pain at the admission Alec is also sure Magnus will recover their relationship ending. He knows Magnus loves him, probably more than he loved his other lovers, he also knows that for the duration of their relationship Magnus had time to get used to the fact that he will lose Alec sooner or later, and if it's sooner but brings his magic back than who is Alec to argue with that logic.

****

He finds Magnus in the library, using one of the computers, his boyfriend for the time being looks haggard and bleak, words that no one would ever use to describe the great Magnus Bane, yet here they are. Alec waits for a beat, stopping in the doorway to drink in the sight of Magnus, of the most precious thing that ever happened to him, before bracing his heart for the impact. He clears his throat and slides on a mask of indifference. Magnus whippes his head around a tired and reserved smile on his face.

'Hello Alexander, I haven't seen you all day. I have news'

'Hello Magnus' he says, voice as steady as he can muster. 'What kind of news?'

Magnus tilt's his head to the side, studying his boyfriend for a second before continuing.

'I found an apartment, not far from here, so close enough for you to walk to work, hitting all of our criteria, I already went over whilst you where gone, as there was a chance to see it in person. And of course if you don't like it we can back out but I've placed an offer and we can start moving in even tomorrow!'

Magnus was mastering as much excitement as possible at this time, after his breakdown yesterday he felt enough shame at showing his weakness, but it was harder and harder to keep his walls up around Alexander who proved to be excellent at getting him to open up, almost against his will. But now gazing at his boyfriends stormy face he couldn't help but recoil, did he make a mistake and Alec wasn't willing to live with him anymore, did he push him away to far to the point of no return?

' That's great. I would say just in time, because you can't stay here any longer'

'Why? Has someone said anything?'

'Nothing like that, it's just.... Magnus I don't think us being together is right at the minute.... I think it's best if we don't see each other anymore.'

'What? I don't... Alexander what are you saying?' Magnus was lost for words, how come this man, who just 24 hours ago was cradling him in his arms whispering reassurance of love suddenly decided that he is not worth it?

Stumbling backwards Magnus kept an eye on Alec, on his stormy face and clenched fists, on his angry posture. Was this his doing? Has he been such a disappointing partner, it wouldn't be the first time, he thought bitterly.

'I think we should break up, without your magic, and with you being so... different. We just don't work anymore.' Alec was speaking through gritted teeth, each word that left his mouth was like a stabbing wound. All he was aching to do was to grab Magnus and never let him go. But that's not what Magnus deserves, he deserves his power, his magic, to live forever, not some pathetic excuse of a boyfriend who can't even bring him happiness.

Magnus was breathing hard, not fully comprehending the fact that after all of what happened in the last weeks he's now also loosing Alec, a reason for his sacrifice. He lost his magic to save his boyfriend from a tragic loss. He took that burden away from him and that's how this ends for him. Without a support he needs so desperately at this awful time. No one treats Magnus Bane this way, not even a person he loves.

Alec can see the exact moment Magnus is hit with the realisation of what is happening. He can see the walls going up, he can almost feel how betrayed Magnus feels. So he's bracing himself cause he knows how good his boyfriend is with words and how much he can hurt him.

'You, you made me believe that I can have love after so many centuries, you took away a part of me, you made me sacrifice myself time and again! You're a pathetic little boy who thinks he can play with people, you're no leader. I wish I never loved you, I wish I left you a long time ago when the chance presented itself! Goodbye Alec'

With that he was gone. Izzy found Alec on the floor of the library an hour later. Her brother in nearly catatonic state, clutching Lightwoods family ring.

****

Magnus was running, running away from that toxic place, form Alec, from this reality. He didn't know where he was going but when he finally looked up he was just a block away from Catarina's apartment. Apparently his brain still worked, in the contrary to his broken heart.

But before he could take another step, he felt a pull of power, some kind of electricity buzzing around him. Looking around he saw a twirling blue and red energy appearing right in front of him. Magnus had no time to react when the energy suddenly started entering his body.

Someone was slapping his cheek, it felt cold and strange against his face. He blinked his eyes open to see a young girl with a skateboard under her pit.

'Are you ok?' She asked.

Magnus blinked a few times after remembering the weird energy, he must've passed out after it entered his body. He was suddenly glad he somehow found himself near Catarina's apartment.

'Yes, yes I'm ok thank you. Must be low on sugar or something' with a quick wave he disappeared as fast as he could.

****

'Your magic is back! When? How did this happen?' were the first words that left Cat's mouth as soon as she opened her door.

'What?'

Can you not feel it?'

'I...' in all his distress Magnus didn't even question the way his body felt. He wasn't expecting his magic to return henceforth he hasn't tried to channel it in any way. But now he could feel it pulsing through him, like a roaring beast it was ready to be unleashed at any time, ready to be wielded. And it was his. It was familiar, felt like coming home after years of separation, it didn't not compare with Lorenzo's magic which did the trick but never felt like his own.

He got rid of his glamour and with glossy eyes looked at Cat, she stood before him tears streaming down her face.

How?' he asked.

'Wait, you don't know?' When did this happen?' she asked suspicion in her voice.

'Literally just now, I was coming to you, I had to leave the Institute, and suddenly this power entered me and bam here I am' he explained not being able to hide his hurt when talking about the Institute.

'What happened at the Institute?' Cat pressed gently, knowing the fragile state her friend has been in the last weeks.

'He, Alec... Alexander broke up with me'

'That's impossible! I know I had my doubts but that boy loves you, he was devastated when you got sick he wouldn't just toss you aside just a few days later'

'Well he did, he said we don't work anymore because I don't have my magic and I'm not myself anymore'

Cat was still looking at him sceptically, she got to know Alec a lot better recently and what Magnus was saying seemed very far away from the Shadowhunters character, but there were more pressing matters at hand.

'So what do you think happened? Asmodeus got bored and decided to just give you your magic back?'

'I doubt that, nothing comes free with my father, but how? I can think of only one way he would agree to giving my magic back to me and that's getting something in return. But I can't think of anyone that would willingly deal with my father... No person other than maybe you or Alexander......oh god.'

'Magnus what is it? Didn't you say he just broke up with you out of nowhere...ohhh'

They shared a look of understanding, a look full of dread.

'No he wouldn't. Why would he do that? Didn't he know I rather die with him than live for eternity without him.?'

'I guess he loves you enough to sacrifice his happiness'

'I told him I'm not happy, I told him there might never be a time when I'm happy again but I didn't tell him that he's the only reason I'm still here, still holding on. What if breaking up with me is not everything he had to offer to my father I have to see him now.'

'Go but don't do anything stupid. Asmodeus can still take your magic back.'

'I ..' he almost said he doesn't care but the words wouldn't leave his mouth because no matter what, Magnus is not being striped of his magic ever again. With the last nod towards Catarina he lets his magic wash over him, his hands start to dance in a manner that could be described as excessive but he doesn't care. He hasn't felt this alive in what feels like years. Soon enough he's walking through a portal straight into Alec's office.

****

He's not surprised to see it empty. If he wasn't trying to fix this mess he would probably be sitting on Cat's couch sobbing right now, so he understands. He spend the last week living in Alec's room at the Institute but nevertheless he decided to knock on the door, when he gets there. His heart nearly breaks at Alec's rough and sad voice coming from inside. 'Izzy please, leave me alone!'

The newly recharged Warlock hesitates only for a second before softly slipping into the room.

'I'm not going anywhere you silly silly Nephilim' he says quietly, but not without passion, it's almost like his voice send electricity towards Alec's body. Next second the Shadowhunter is up on his feet, hands wiping down his face of any fluids.

'Magnus what are you doing here? Haven't I made myself clear that I don't want to see you anymore?' he says and it would be much more convincing if Alec didn't look ready to be sick at having to repeat those words.

'What is clear to me, is that I have my magic back and that my boyfriend decided to make a deal with my father behind my back.'

Alec's eyes widen just for a second before he's moving, stepping closer to Magnus. Magnus who doesn't expect to be manhandled towards the door.

'I don't know what you're talking about. Please just leave I can't ..we can't'.'

'Yes we can, Alexander we will figure this out, please'

'Magnus no, he only agreed to this if we're not together anymore, he will take it back otherwise, you can't ...I just want you to be happy, please let me help you be happy'

'I am happy, when I wake next you, when I see your smile, when you speak sweet nothings into my ear, when I hold your hand, when I know that I have the love of my life by my side, that's when I'm happy.'

' But you said, that without your magic...I wanted you to be whole again, to fix my mistakes.'

'First of all it was my choice and second of all I said I wasn't happy, and that was true, my magic means the world to me but you darling you are my world. I can survive loosing my magic it would take time, but loosing you, the pain I was in was unimaginable. I love you Alexander Lightwood, and I'm not letting you go, even if it means I have to face my father again.'

'I love you too Magnus Bane and I'm so so sorry.'

And they cried softly together until they both felt like they are strong enough to face the world after this turmoil of emotions

#malec #Alec Lightwood #Magnus Bane #malec fic #Shadowhunters

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eversall · 6 years

Note

3 with jimon !!

jimon + 3. hesitant kiss

“Hey,” Jace whispers into the darkness, “you awake?”

Simon groans and muffles a scream into his pillow, and seriously considers moving to the London Institute. It’s a real offer. Aline likes him.

“I am running on two hours of sleep across the last two days,” Simon says into the pillow he’s still clutching over his face, “but yes, I am.” He pauses, and then he pulls the pillow away and rolls over to face Jace, who’s sleeping on the floor next to him. They’re in an abandoned safe-house somewhere in New Jersey, camped out for the night until they get reinforcements in the morning. “What’s up?”

Jace frowns at him. “I’m trying to be nicer,” he whispers, “but you’re making it very difficult, Lewis.”

“You don’t need to whisper.” Simon says shifting and tucking his arm under his head. “And I’m just cranky, okay. But you have my full attention. My ears are yours. I am your transfixed audience of one - “

“Shut up.” Jace groans, squeezing his eyes shut and then opening them again, looking at Simon with something unfathomable in his eyes. It’s dark, but Simon can pinpoint the exact point where the brown of Jace’s eye slices into the blue; his gaze is suddenly light and dark at the same time, and the silence is larger, somehow. Simon swallows.

“Sometimes,” Jace says, his voice measured and even, “I think about the bite.”

Simon’s lips part on a quiet exhale, and Jace tracks the motion. He wants to pretend he doesn’t know why Jace is bringing it up now, but he does know, in the same way he and Jace have been slowly trapped in each other’s orbits in the last few months. It’s in the quiet brush of their shoulders against each other, the stillness of all the words left unsaid when they go on missions together, fighting side-by-side and looking at each other with a hunger Simon’s afraid to pursue.

And the mission they’re on now - they’re tracking a Shadowhunter from the Los Angeles Institute that was bitten by a vampire and went rogue, all the way to Jersey. Simon’s heard through the Clan that the bite was from a lover, not an enemy; the Shadowhunters don’t know it.

Simon suspects Jace knows it anyway. He’d read the case files that documented the Shadowhunter visiting bars, museums, concerts where the vampire happened to have been at the same time; he’d seen footage taken of the Shadowhunter training, his hands trembling and his eyes glued to his phone, his smile genuine and unafraid when someone had called him, and he’d laughed and brought his hand up to trace across the base of his neck -

It was easy for Simon and Izzy and even Clary to put two-and-two together; it would have taken nothing at all for Jace to understand too. In another world, that could have been Jace. In this world - it was Izzy. For a while, anyway.

“This is why,” Simon says finally, “I’m jealous of the wolves sometimes.” Jace keeps looking at him, and Simon continues. “They never have to wonder if what they’re feeling is real or not.”

Maia, and Luke, and even Magnus are wonderful, supportive friends - but there’s a reason that despite all the bad history between them Simon is still friends with Raphael and still vaguely a part of the Clan. He’s always hungry; somewhere deep inside there’s an ache for blood that he can’t explain away. It’s not like human hunger; it’s deeper, richer, more primal. It makes him stronger than he’d ever imagined he could be, and it makes the entire world sharper around him; but it also cracks him down the middle, seeps into his bones and hollows out his skin. It’s not quite a drug; it’s a part of him that he can’t trust, a reflex that’s more powerful than the sum of all his parts.

“I told you then,” Jace says finally, shifting closer, “that I would have let you.”

“I could have killed you.” Simon echoes softly. There are small slivers of moonlight coming through the windows, tracing across the skin of Jace’s neck, the strong slope of a rune line a stark contrast to the rest of him.

“I would have let you then because I was mad with grief.” Jace say quietly, and there’s an old hurt in his eyes, a wound that Simon doesn’t think is ever going to go away. “I would have let you for me. Now I think - “ He swallows, his veneer of confidence wavering just enough to make him look impossibly fragile for a second before he soldiers on, “I think I’d let you for you.”

Simon feels a pang in his dead chest. “It’s not that simple.” He doesn’t want to take the last step. He can’t.

“It is.” Jace says. He props himself up, looming over Simon in the dark, his hair falling softly over his face. Simon’s struck with an intense ache to brush it away, to trace his fingers across Jace’s temple and feel the rasp of Jace’s stubble across his jaw. “Do you trust me?”

Simon knows the answer immediately, knows how he feels, but it takes a courage he’s not sure he has to say it out loud. Being a vampire has changed him, has made him understand time and death and forever in a way that paints the world just a little darker than it was as a human; he’s afraid, so fucking afraid, of messing things up again. Jace isn’t the only one who feels sometimes like he’s nothing anymore, like he’s been taken and turned into a shadow of who he should be, an act he doesn’t know how to stop.

Maybe that’s why Jace is here, taking the first step. Maybe Jace - honest, genuine, incredible Jace, who is here, choosing him, fiercely confident in that infuriating way he has - is okay with Simon as he is, fear and all.

Simon gives in to temptation and reaches up to slowly tuck Jace’s hair behind his ear, and then he lets his fingers linger at Jace’s temple, his hand cradling Jace’s cheek. Jace leans into the touch.

“Yeah.” Simon breathes out, and Jace leans down, wrapping his hand around Simon’s wrist for balance as he presses his lips to Simon’s, the kiss feather-light and impossibly soft. Warmth curls through Simon’s stomach and he strains upwards, slowly pressing his lips back to Jace’s mouth, over and over again. Jace’s breath is ragged, his heart beating in a rapid staccato. It’s like thunder in Simon’s ears; Jace’s lips are lightning, electricity creeping through Simon’s skin and lighting a slow fire in him.

They kiss for what seems like an eternity, before Jace pulls away, breathing quietly, heavily, and looking at Simon like he’s a blind man seeing the sun for the first time. Simon feels like a blind man looking at the sun for the first time; he tugs Jace into his arms and they tangle themselves together, Jace stopping every so often to press kisses to Simon’s mouth, like he can’t help himself.

“You’re going to be the death of me, Lewis.” Jace says lowly, but he’s grinning, smirking, and for the first time in a while, the ache in Simon lessens. Simon rolls his eyes and splays his hand across Jace’s chest, listening to the soothing rhythm of life under his palm.

“But oh, what a way to go.” He says absently, and Jace’s heart beats in double-time in response, promising life and death and everything in between.

#jimon #jace lightwood #simon lewis #shadowhunters #i write sometimes #pugnae

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lwjoon · 7 years

Text

All I could ever ask for

Alec insist they go buy groceries instead of summoning them and it ends up being the fluffiest thing I have ever written

"Alexander, why are we here?" Magnus asks as he shifts their blueberry on his arms and glances at his shadowhunter, who is currently trying to pick a shopping cart and make faces at max at the same time, "we didn't need to go here, you know? I could have just summoned all the ingredients we needed for the pasta."

Alec silently cheers when he manages to pull two carts apart and looks back at Magnus with an eyebrow raised. Magnus huffs, "and this time I would have left some money."

"Yeah, right," Alec says and smirks when he sees Magnus offended expression, "I'm kidding," Magnus rolls his eyes before walking ahead towards the entrance of the oh-so-magical place called Costco. Alec follows him with a grin and laughs at Magnus horrified expression when the doors close behind them.

"I can't believe you dragged me into this," Magnus gives Alec a dangerous look and jumps when he hears someone through the speakers

'Janice, to aisle 4, we need Janice's help at aisle 4'

"More like at all aisles, don't we, my dear blueberry?" Magnus cooes as Max babbles nonsense and touches Magnus' face with a big grin on his adorable face.

"By the Angel, Magnus," Alec says and takes Max from Magnus' arms to seat him on the shopping cart and kissing his head, "It isn't that bad, can't you at least try?"

Magnus looks from Alec's hazel puppy eyes to Max's amazed face when he sees the balloon adorning some of the aisles and sighs before nodding.

"Yes!" Alec cheers and kisses Magnus' cheek before looking down at their son -who was paying more attention to everything but their small argument and continues putting his fist in his mouth and kicking the air with his small feet- "We're going to have so much fun, Max!" Max giggles when Alec kissed his head again and starts making grabby hands when he sees a giant bear. They notice and Magnus is just lifting his hand when Alec shakes his head at him.

"What?"

"No magic, remember?"

"Oh , right" Magnus sighs and stays with Max while Alec walks towards the pile of bears.

...

"I still can't believe you had to grab another cart," Magnus laughs along with Max while Alec shakes their head at them with a smile. Alec would give up his own life to make sure they always smiled like that.

"Well, we still have to grab the pasta ingredients and I doubt the bear left any space," Alec looks down at the bear with a frown. Magnus looked at him with a small smile and touched his arm with the hand that Max wasn't grabbing.

"You know, I can always-"

"No magic," Magnus takes a step back when he saw Alec's alarmed expression and murmurs under his breath.

"Alright, no magic."

...

It is night when they finally get out and Magnus sighs in relief when he feels the fresh air against his face. Max apparently has the same thought, if the way he feels him relax against his chest says something. He had to magic a sling for his blueberry so he could carry the bags.

He looks at Alec to tell him when he sees his shadowhunter is looking back at the with the biggest grin Magnus has ever seen on his face.

"What?"

"Nothing, just-" Alec looks down at Max and brushes his hair with his hand before looking back at his fiancé and kissing him with all he has.

Magnus kisses him back and when they part he just stares him with awe. Alec clears his throat but he keeps the smile when he asks:

"Wanna go home?" Magnus narrows his eyes at him but then he summons a portal and leans his head towards it while he looks at alec.

"Let's go home, darling".

They step through the portal experimentally and when they get to their living room they notice Max has fallen asleep. Magnus nods at Alec and vanishes the sling before he takes off the glamour and carefully places Max in his arms. Alec heads to the nursery while Magnus uses his magic to put the groceries in the pantry before joining them.

The warlock snaps his fingers to turn on the lights -and dim them too so they don't wake Max up- and rests his hand on his Alexander's shoulder. Alec carefully pries his hand away from Max's and covers him with his blue blanket before they both lean to kiss his forehead.

"We should start making dinner before he wakes up," Alec says and Magnus nods before taking the baby monitor and heading to the kitchen with him. When they get to work o the pasta he manages to steal a glance at Alexander and notices he seems happier and lighter than when they got to the supermarket.

"Someone seems happy," Alec glances up from the tomatoes he was cutting and stares at magnus with confusion and joy. When he processes what Magnus said there's a sudden blush creeping up his neck.

"Well, I am happy," Magnus smiles sadly and looks down at the cutting board covered in flour with a sigh.

"And here I thought my magic had ruined your day," he mutters and out of the corner of his eye he sees alec freezing and leaving the knife before looking back at Magnus.

"What?"

"What?" Magnus keeps a blank expression when he looks back at Alec

"Mag-" Magnus sees the exact moment realization reaches his lover's face, "Magnus, I didn't mean to- I'm sorry. I just- I wanted our adventure there to be-"

"Magic-less?"

"I didn't mean it like that," at Magnus' questioning look, he explains.

"When I was younger, I think I was nine but it was such a long time that I-," he pauses to look back at Magnus who is paying attention at the tale and nods at him to continue, so Alec obliges, "When my parents fought and Izzy was scared I would break the rules a bit I take her anywhere else so she could distract herself and take her mind of things. The first time we went to the park and that worked for a while, but then I worried it wouldn't be safe anymore so we looked for another place and that's when I saw it..."

"Costco," Alec nods at the sound of Magnus voice.

"I know it sounds silly, but every time we went I would let Izzy look at the clothes and books while I looked around and sometimes I would see families shopping there, with no worries, no troubling, like it was the most normal thing in the world and now that I think about it, maybe it was. But when I went there, it felt like I could press pause in my life and just... be there, you know?, " he glances at Magnus before continuing, "then I grew up, I guess and it was harder for me to take izzy there because of training and all my duties as a shadowhunter and I guess I wanted to experience that with you and Max."

"Alexander, I'm-"

"It's alright, " Alec squeezes his hand and leans his head on Magnus shoulder, "I'm glad I got to have that with you," Magnus is stroking his hair when he speaks:

"I'm sorry I reacted like that."

"And I'm sorry I didn't let you use your magic. It's a part of you and I shouldn't have-" Magnus closes the distance between them and smiles into the kiss when Alec deepens it. He feels Alec's hands on his chest and he's about to do something about it when they hear Max's cries through the baby monitor.

They both rush to the nursery and Alec picks up Max while Magnus cradles his head and they start cooing at him until he calms down and looks up at them expectantly.

"Hello, blueberry," Magnus whispers and Alec smiles when suddenly blue sparks emanate from his fingers, their dance making Max suck his fist and kick his feet in the air.

"Thank you," Magnus looks up at the sound of Alec's voice and lifts his other hand to push Alec's hair away from his face and cup his cheek.

"Thank you for giving me a family, Alexander"

#Blue Post #malec fic #my ff #malec #malec fluff #first time writing malec yayy

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imgilmoregirl · 6 years

Text

A Rose of the Forbidden Love

AO3 Link

Chapter Nine

Neal was sat completely alone in the waiting room, staring nervously at his hands, he had spoken to Emma just a couple of minutes ago – and she giggling asked him to not faint like he had when she went into labour – but that hadn’t helped with anything. Nobody would allow him to see Rose – he wasn’t related to her nor was he the father of the baby – so he had to stay there and watch the hours pass.

After what seemed to be a whole eternity for him, Jacinda appeared, bringing her lover and his brother with her. His jaw clenched at the sight of Roland coming with them following Henry like a little dog, as if he didn’t have a wife home and as if Rose hadn’t yet let it clear that she didn’t want him to keep seeking for her.

"What is he doing here?"

"He was with Henry and I when you called," Jacinda explained. "He insisted to come."

"Rose doesn't want him anywhere near her!"

Roland stepped forward, looking as angry as Neal felt. If they weren’t in a hospital in such complicated circumstances, he swore he would have already punch that boy and made him leave.

"I don't know who the hell do you think you are, but Rosalie is having my child and I will, yes, stay."

Taking a deep breath, Neal grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, decided to not let Roland stay there, even if nobody allowed him inside Rose’s room, because he didn’t want her to go through any kind of stress right now, however, before he could start to drag Roland out, Father Gold appeared, giving him the kind of look that made him immediately step back.

"Stop, the two of you, stop now," the priest commanded, then looked around to see Sabine arriving too and arched an eyebrow to him. "Did you call everybody she knows, Neal?"

"I was desperate," he said, shrinking and narrowing his eyes at the woman beside Gold. "Who is this?"

"She is the one who is going away," Jacinda answered in a tone full of hate, giving the priest an incredulous glance. "Father Gold, this bitch did everything she could to bring hell to Rose's life. Why did you bring her?"

The woman, who Neal now supposed to be Ms. French shifted closer to Father Gold, yes glued on the floor, making him think she felt ashamed of everything she had done.

"This is a question for another time," the priest answered. "Now, where is Rose?"

"In labour yard, they won't allow anybody in. We need to wait."

And inevitably, that’s what they did.

Rose cradled the baby close to her chest, marvelling at how tiny and perfect she was, nestled inside a soft white blanket a pink hat on the top of her head. She took one of her hands analysing the small fingers with a smile before she pressed a kiss to the baby's forehead.

"Hello, little princess," Rose cooed to her daughter. "I've been waiting to meet you."

There was a tiny sound coming from her as the little girl moved around, hiding her face on the blanket and Rose giggled, changing her position, so the baby would be more comfortable. Most of the nurses had already left, just one of them remaining in the room Rose was meant to spend the night in, finishing to settle some things out before leaving. She stopped by Rose's bed, giving her a smile.

"Do you want me to bring somebody to see you, Ms. Weaver? There is a bit of a commotion in your name outside. Maybe the father?"

"No," Rosalie answered. "There is a priest in here, Father Gold. I'd like to see him."

"Alright," the nurse nodded, opening the door and disappearing through it.

Once she was gone, Rose's attention went back to the baby. The early events of that day were almost completely forgotten by her, because that really mattered was that her daughter was alright. It had been a painful and terrifying labour, as it all happened too fast and the doctors were afraid her fall had caused some damage to her of the baby, but apparently, despite of the bruises covering all the skin of her left side and the wound in her head, everything was fine.

"You're going to meet someone very special," she told her daughter to which the baby yawned. "Are you sleepy?"

The door crackled open and Father Gold entered the room, smiling widely at her, as if he was seen the sun for the first time in ages. His whole face was illuminated in a way she had never seen before.

"Excuse me?"

"Come in, Father, come see her."

He stepped closer, taking a seat on the chair next to her bed and as he looked down at the baby, Rose swore she saw tears in his eyes.

"Oh, you've had a girl," the priest murmured in awe. "She is beautiful, Rose."

"Thank you," Rosalie answered, then lifted the baby, handing her to him, who looked completely unsure of what to do, so she explained: "I would like to ask something of you. Here hold her."

Father Gold finally nodded and received the baby girl in his arms, cradling her head and staring at her will eyes full of wonder as he marvelled at this tiny new human being.

"What do you want, dearest?"

"Name her," Rose asked.

The priest blinked, surprised at the request, which he certainly wasn't expecting.

"What?"

"Give her a name," she explained reaching to touch his arm. "You helped me so much, I would be really important to me if you named her."

His heart was beating fast inside his chest. He could barely believe his daughter was asking this of him and suddenly something came to his mind. Adam looked at his granddaughter once more, before he lifted his glance to Rosalie, the perfect name on the tip of his tongue.

"Isabelle."

"Oh, Father Gold, please not this one," Rose begged. "You know how much I still resent Ms. French."

"Yes, I know, but if your daughter has this name, then you'll start to learn how to forgive by saying it with love other than hate."

She took a deep breath, giving it a second thought. The name was in fact a beautiful one and the only thing keeping her from agreeing immediately with the priest's choice was the fact it was Ms. French's name. But she couldn't restrain her life to things that didn't remember her about painful things in her past, if that was the name Father Gold had chosen, then that it would be.

"Isabelle," Rose pronounced. "Little Izzy she will be."

A giant smile spread on the priest's lips and he gently lifted the baby, pressing a kiss to her rosy cheek.

"Welcome to the world Izzy, it is a pleasure to meet you."

Adam found Belle in the parking lot, turning off her cell phone and throwing it inside her purse with a soft frown narrowing her brow. He walked towards her, admiring how beautiful she looked in that lacy yellow dress, almost resembling the old Belle. He certainly couldn't wait until it all was over and he was no priest anymore, so he could final properly claim her as his.

"It was Regina," Belle said as soon as she saw him. "Apparently Roland called her crying like a baby because he hasn’t yet met his daughter. Henry took him home a while ago."

He nodded fiercely, but he wasn’t caring much about Roland right now. Actually, he didn’t like him that much, because of everything he had done to Rose, however Gold needed to admit that he should be up there in that hospital room beside her and the baby. Rosalie may not be willing to say it now, but that was what she wanted too and deep down, what she truly needed.

"She is a pretty thing, our granddaughter," Adam started. "Her name is Isabelle."

"What?"

"Izzy for short," he added.

Tears shined in her eyes as she blinked repeatedly before they started to fall down her face and she passed her arms around his waist, laying her head against his chest as Adam’s hand came up to caress he hair.

"You did this, don't you?"

"Maybe," he shrugged, trying to hid a little smirk, but it didn’t matter if it was Rose’s choice or his, Belle’s name had been passed to their granddaughter he was sure that little girl would love her very much. "I'll make things work out between you and Rose. I promise. And I will resign as soon as everything is settled down. I've already spent too much time away from you."

She looked up at him, kissing his jaw before pulling away, knowing that right now their relationship must remain in secret as he still was a priest and anybody who saw them together would be scandalized.

"If you want to be with me, you'll have to ask Gideon and Alice's permission first."

"I surely will," he promised, before opening the door of the Cadillac for her and take her home.

Rose stayed in the hospital for about four days, as the doctors were still worried about her because of the fall and the Izzy because she had come earlier than she should. But two days ago, Neal had driven them home to a big welcome back party, full of pink presents, balloons and a delicious cake, however now she was alone, the girls were working, Neal was looking for apartments and she needed to take care of her daughter.

Izzy was a really calm baby, but Rose didn’t manage to get much sleep yet, because when she wasn’t nursing her, she was just staring at the baby, making sure she was breathing properly and she wouldn’t disappear if she blinked her eyes. It was still weird to think Izzy was there, when she hadn’t existed for those long years of her life, however she felt good to have her there. She would do right by her child and Isabelle would never have to life with all the doubts she did.

Placing her down on the basket near the couch, Rose went to the kitchen and opened some cabinets, looking for a quick snack when she heard the knock on her door and struggled to close a box of tea with a particularly difficult lid

"Just a minute," she yelled, but yet again, someone knocked. "I'm coming!"

Giving up on the box, she went to the door, opening it to find Roland behind, holding a giant bouquet of red roses in one hand and a big purple bear that wore a shirt with the phrase “I love daddy” on the other.

"Hey, may I come in?"

Rose took a deep breath, looking away from his presents and his big puppy eyes, trying to remember herself that for her own sake, she should stay the farthest away from his that she could.

"Roland, you and your wife have already caused me too much trouble. I just want to have some peace!"

"My wife?" He blinked. "You have only seen Ivy a couple of times at the company!"

"Oh, I see she haven't told you about her little visit,” Rose started, sarcastically, eyes narrowing at him. “Well, my labour started earlier because Ivy pushed me down the stairs."

His eyes got wide and he entered the flat without her permission, placing the flowers and the bear on the counter as he turned around to see her, trying to understand this new information.

"She did what?"

"Yeah, Roland, your daughter and I almost died because of your mad, mad wife!"

He shook his head, cupping her shoulders and stroking her through the fabric of her blouse, which almost made Rose want to close her eyes and give into his calming touch. Everything would be easier if he had been honest with her right from the start.

"Love, I'm sorry, I didn't know," he whispered in a sweet tone. "I just want to see the baby. Please."

Against her best will, Rose sighed and murmured: "You have five minutes."

An excited smile appeared on his lips as Roland turned around, walking towards the basket and taking his first look at their daughter. He sat on the couch touching Isabelle’s tiny hands and marvelling at how her small fingers curled around this thumb. Roland looked up slightly confused.

"How should I..."

Very gently, Rose lifted the baby, handing her to the father.

"Support the head," she instructed. "Be careful."

Roland nodded eagerly, taking a hold of Isabelle and nestling her against the cold fabric of his brown leather jacket. Her eyes flew open, brown and deep, so dark that they were almost black.

"Oh, hi, Izzy. I'm your dad, sweetie and I promise we will be together."

Rose shook her head to his silly words, however she couldn’t help but smile at the sight of him, cradling their baby in his arms.

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #mine #writing #rumplestiltskin #belle french #ao3 #fanfic

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