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#ideal location
knowltonsrangers · 1 year
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ideal location [ch.11]
Nathan Hale x F!Reader
To be honest, once again, you weren’t completely sure how you ended up here. You’ve found yourself saying that a lot lately, and while the confusion was there, it somehow just happened and you had no arguments.
“You are entertained by this?”
In reality, you weren’t really expecting him to be scared of the film. He was a soldier, a spy-he’s probably has seen a lot more bloodshed than you’ll ever see in a lifetime.
But for him to be so close, so uncertain over a classic such as this, nearly in your lap as he stiffens at every jump-scare.
You’ve seen this movie more than a few times, it’s your favorite, and you’ve already messed with him by quoting some lines every now and then on perfect cue. If he didn’t think you were absolutely insane before this, he definitely thinks such now.
“Yeah, it’s not really about the gorey stuff for me, I like the cheap tricks. The silence and then a loud noise, yanno?”
“I do not understand how anyone would find this kind of genre to be something to enjoy.”
Nathan sniffs, startled once more as a knife falls to the ground on the television screen.
“Well, there’s plenty of other movies, you can have your pick—“
“No,”
His arm has come round the back of the sofa, but hasn’t quite touched your shoulders yet. You’ve barely noticed it, because he’s gotten so much closer to you over the course of the hour. It’s here, in the dim light of the tv light, you can notice his prominent features he has so graciously told you the stories of.
The scar that he received from gun powder exploding in his face, the mole on his neck.
You love them both. They’re both uniquely him.
But you also get to appreciate his freckles. His blue eyes, the way they flick back and forth to watch the main character get chased by the killer. His flaxen hair, since he’s let it out of his short ponytail, the way it frames his face.
He’s beautiful, and every time you look at him, you’re reminded of the thought.
“Does no one survive, y/n?”
Your eyes snap back to the screen, horrified he’s caught you staring.
“No…not really. There’s like six of these movies, always new characters and always the same killer.”
“So grotesque.”
Now, you’re certain he’s doing it on purpose, the way his hand casually drops down to sit in the crook of your neck.
You thought that was a twenty-first century man’s trick, but it really seemed to be the oldest trick in the book.
Beside you, Nathan is sweating. This, he’s decided, would be a simple, yet finite test. If you reacted negatively to the minuscule act, he would forget his affection and move forward without a word of it.
This, just makes things more complicated.
You don’t react, you if anything, move even more close, nestled into his side, albeit the pillow between you both.
Lord, you were going to kill him.
When the movie ends, you turn to go switch the television off, but his voice stops you.
“Are you tired?”
“No, why?”
“May we watch the second film? You said there are six,”
You laugh, feeling a tint of red cross your cheeks.
“You just said how disgusting they were, Nate. Not really in the business of making you watch stuff you don’t like, nor stuff that will keep you up at night.”
He looks mildly offended, arm retreating back to his side.
“But you enjoy them, no? I’d like to watch the rest.”
He catches himself.
“Well, not all of them tonight. But I would not mind another.”
What was it about this guy? Why was he…just so much better than any other person you’ve been in a relationship with?
He cared. A lot.
“You’d really sit through another two hours of cheap horror…for me?”
He appears confused by your question.
“If it is something you want, why not? This is new for me, I would like to enjoy them with you.”
Nathan shrugs.
“Maybe I will have an affection for them, too.”
Once more, he’s gotten you heart beating in your chest, pounding, making tears well up in your eyes just by his honest words.
“Uh—! y/n?! Why are you crying?”
Worried, and concerned, Nathan leans forward to better see your face in the horrible lighting from the television.
“No, I’m okay. Sorry, I don’t know what came over me—“
What man would sit here and watch a movie you love, even though he doesn’t? Why would he do anything with you at the drop of a dime?
He could have just abused you and your resources, up and left here the moment you couldn’t help him immediately. But he’s stayed.
Was your ex that really of a shitty person, that he makes Nathan look like an angel?
Well, yes. But, Nathan Hale really is, a genuine, kind, and loving person.
“Let’s start the second one.”
You insist.
“Alright…If you are certain.”
He is not convinced of your terrible lie, but decides to table it for the time being. Instead, he smiles to no one but himself as the title screen for the second movie appears.
“You know, if I ever went back…I do not think I would ever be able to explain this is what the future is. The future exists, the future we fought for…”
His voice trails as he catches you staring, your eyes bleary but sparkling all in the same moment.
“What would be the first thing you would try to explain? The television, or the toaster?”
He hasn’t heard a word you’ve said, because the only thing he’s looking at is your lips, and the way they move when you talk.
Sitting down, he can admire you. Relatively the same height, to his advantage, here, he can follow the way your eyes move, catch the rosy hue on your cheeks, and see the soft laughter lines that come out with every smile you give him.
From either side, the action was done at the same exact moment. He leaned down, you crept up, and as your hand falls to his chest, his comes to cradle your cheek.
And you aren’t entirely sure why, but it was the most magical moment you’ve ever experienced in your entire life.
Beside you, Nathan isn’t entirely sure why he didn’t do this any other moment he’s had, because it was the most amazing moment he’s ever experienced in his entire life.
you kissed.
[a/n: THIS IS MY FAVORITE CHAPTER tO DATE. THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING I’VE EVER WRITTEN.]
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76historylover · 2 years
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a fanfiction hasn't made me scream in happiness, giddiness and angst in quite some time like "ideal location" by @knowltonsrangers/sul!! amazing job! i can't wait for the next chapter!!
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bocchidaily · 16 days
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i showed one of my friends your bocchi otter drawing and he asked "could you ask if they could draw her as a raccoon ???"
soo yeah . bocchi the raccoon suggestion
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Day 136: I didn't intend to make her so. Forehead
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little-pup-pip · 4 months
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25 Days of Agere Moodboards! Day 24: Ideal Vacation!!
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francesderwent · 9 months
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what are your top two places to cry and why are they your car and church
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whentherewerebicycles · 6 months
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the ultrasound tech took all these amazing full-body shots of him squirming around and kicking and rubbing his face with his fists and doing handstands.... and then of course the one she printed for me is this weirdly zoomed-in grainy image where he looks like a mysterious cryptid 😂 i was like wow thank you so much. but everything looked good on the scan! all his limbs and organs are where they should be and look how they should look! the scan was for genetic screening purposes and the initial results are within the normal range, but i guess they have to evaluate a bunch of different factors all together before they can tell you anything more definitive. however (after spending two hours googling journal articles lol) I am making the RADICAL DECISION to stop worrying about it. i think my baby is probably healthy. and man he really looks like a baby now (i mean not in the above image lol but in general) and not just a little seahorse. i couldn't believe how lively he was! just motoring around in there and twisting all around and flipping himself over. it's so bizarre to watch him on the screen but not be able to feel him moving at all yet. like there's a little miniature creature inside of me doing his own thing! and one day he will be outside of me doing his own thing! and i think it's best not to spend too much time dwelling on the process by which he moves from inside to outside, all things considered!
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hirazuki · 9 months
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I'm an idiot and completely forgot that the only thing I was waiting on for a Maeglin cosplay was a longsword, which... I've now had for a month ^^;
SO threw together a quick costest for the lad today. Mostly pleased, though there are a few things I want to adjust; and I need to figure out if the reason his eyeliner/eyeshadow color isn't showing up properly is because it's too dark or because of this particular lighting/phone camera setup (I decided on dark blue for him, but it's not showing here the way it is in person).
Also, with thin clothing like this, compression bra/binding doesn't cut it for me, and I wear my silicone torso to change up how the fabric drapes on me -- so I wore it today, to make sure my clothes still fit with it on (as these are just my daily clothes lmao). Aaand, since I already went to the trouble of wearing it (it is a huge pain in the ass to take on/off), I figured might as well take some fun photos too -- enjoy, under the cut! XD
. . .
[Well, there were fun photos but tumblr won't make this post visible to y'all if I include them so T_T It was literally just shirtless + sword, good grief.]
Edit: I added them via a reblog, which you guys should be able to view below!
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qwesty-030 · 4 months
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Genefinny Week
Day 2: date night!!
they would’ve had matching outfits 🙁
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betelgeusing · 2 years
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marty hart's cyclical return to praising family as THE thing that keeps a man grounded, stable, and happy (specifically in pointing out that rust DOESN'T have a family) even as flashbacks show him spiraling into jealous macho violence as he lies to, mistreats, and destroys his family over the course of multiple affairs (by which he deliberately steps outside of and away from his family despite his wife's best efforts to get him to reconnect and step up to be the family man he sees himself as)
vs
rust cohle's repeated excoriations of the idea of individuality and personhood and the stupid self-centeredness and entitlement that comes with saying "I, a human being, matter to the universe, and the things I do matter", an ideology he carries for years and waxes poetic on for his interviewers as late as 2012, even as he obsessively works himself to the bone to get justice and resolution for the victims he's assigned and ultimately to protect children from the powerful and dangerous people who want to brutalize them
#true detective#so what if it all goes back to Melville and Milch. every great character spins against the way he drives#I know this is the point of their characters I know other people have said it before and better#but I go through it every time and this time Marty is hitting me extra hard. bc with Rust it's basically screaming in your face#Rust says humanity (without exception) is stupid selfish and vain and we're fools to convince ourself our actions matter#he then proceeds to take a job where everything he does matters SO MUCH. and to CARE about that job deeply and obsessively#but Marty... I've really noticed this time how Maggie calls him a coward multiple times in her efforts to pull him back to his family#and she's right because he's too much of a coward to face that gaining the sainted ''family'' hasn't fixed him!#it hasn't made him stop wanting to fuck other women#it hasn't made him the household hero the perfect father and husband the savior of the women in his life#he thought it would and when it doesn't live up to the fantasy he checks out completely#and even in 2012 when his marriage has fallen apart! he still lauds marriage and family as the thing that makes a man good!#despite all the evidence in front of him that he became WORSE after becoming a husband and father. he can't let the ideal go#he has good intentions at his core but he's obsessed with the idea of being a good ol boy and a family man#he shits on Rust for being isolated because he's scared to face the idea that he-- Marty-- would have done less damage on his own#sorry for the tag novel they make me want to bite. and knock their stupid empty heads together really hard#btw this show would be 75% less effective if they had not filmed on location. big brain move thank God for the TD S1 location scouts
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opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months
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...
#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog#didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move#across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s#so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help#with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the#location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright#colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird#like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the#southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December#it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but#i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and#jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen#im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and#the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier#for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy#but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked#up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents#r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes#better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book#like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭#so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-]#unrelated
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knowltonsrangers · 1 year
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ideal location [ch.14]
Nathan Hale x F!Reader
Now, appears a moment of weakness that Nathan Hale dares not speak of to another soul. You, who knew too much of him, yet not enough, would be the only bearer for this momentary lapse of better judgement, noted that you wouldn’t be awake to see it so.
He was wide awake once more, even after lulling into a peaceful sleep prior. It would only be for an hour, but for the man, it felt as if minutes melted into days.
Feeling so vulnerable is a emotion that he’d rather not revisit. The notion of being so exposed is what made him stand out, mission for Washington in his left shoe, and his Yale diploma in his bag.
In Latin. Latin! The worst way to code anything—if he had known what he knows now, he’d turn and high-tail it out of that tavern.
But he doesn’t. The last thing he remembers, he…
He shudders.
“y/n…”
It’s hoarse, hand coming out that was once tucked neatly under his head. It hovers, willing to push some hair away from your eyes, yet, never moves.
His mind is begging you to wake up, because he’d never gather the courage to wake you up himself. Nathan hates feeling so hopeless, yet, every time his gaze shifts to you, the sensation alleviates.
He can’t help it, wanting you to comfort him. The way you do it makes him feel so validated in his own feelings, just as emotions were exchanged easily between he and his own brother, as well as his best friend…
Memories meld, and it’s harder to bite back the tears of anger that rise. If Nathan was adamant about one thing, it’s that you would never have to see him deal with such frustrations. It wasn’t about being a man, no, quite the contrary. Tears shouldn’t be a form of weakness, they are a way of expression.
It’s the worry that he cannot stand, he’s seen it well up in your eyes far too many times for his liking. When you look over at him, his chest just about tightens until he feels like he has to gasp for air.
These horrible memories, nightmares, whatever they may be, are all just in his head.
It’s his own mind playing horrible tricks on him, remembering some things so vividly, and others, as if they weren’t ever really there.
“Why is this happening?”
He asks to no one in particular, whispering a rhetorical question to the night air. He’s so torn he could scream, and then his eyes move to you once more.
The impression seizes, just by the way your chest rises and falls. If you could see it, you’d call him a creep with a playful shove to the arm.
No, he will be alright. Fate is what steers him. Fate urged him to join the war, fate saw him to his mission, fate brought him here.
To you.
Things will change, things will get better.
You are the living proof of that.
When he blinks his eyes open, you aren’t next to him anymore. It’s an immediate rush of panic, hands darting out across the mattress as if you had just moved away from him, just out of reach. When he still doesn’t find you, he’s sat up straight, eyes roaming around the room to locate you.
Is he…?
No.
Stubbornly, he would never admit that that was the best night of sleep he’s gotten since he’s been here. It felt refreshing to have had slept almost fully throughout the night, and not waking up to deathly memories or painful nightmares.
“y/n?”
It’s firmer now, a question he immediately seeks the answer to.
Wandering into the hall, he finds a light, your bathroom door was open, and when he retreats from the bed and pushes the door open fully, you are brushing your teeth, pulling your hair back away from your face.
“Good morning!”
Your chirp, waving to him in the reflection of the mirror. The Captain walks behind you, standing so he can stare over the top of your head to see your expression in the mirror.
“Y’alright, Nate?”
You ask, cautious, wondering if he even remembered what happened last night.
“Yes, good morning.”
It’s not clear how he should be acting, having just slept in a women’s bed he was barely courting. His father would be furious, yet, he can hardly find it in him to dwell on it much.
It was the best thing that could have happened to him last night, regardless of the precedent.
“Wanna make breakfast here? Or maybe we should…get you some fresh air…hey, what’s wrong?”
You put your toothbrush down, watching his anguished eyes in the mirror.
“I…”
Nathan’s tongue comes out to wet his lips, briefly, voice trailing as he can’t seem to quite articulate his words.
“Nate…?”
You ask after a few moments too long.
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost—agh, that’s bad analogy.”
Your palm smacks your forehead, but if it phased Nathan, he does nothing to show it.
“Um, but you look pale, and you’re kinda scaring me with this whole—uh?”
What you weren’t expecting, was for him to lean towards you, dropping all of his weight on you in a hug that made your chest hurt.
“Thank you. For last night, I…I am indebted, but sincerely, thank you.”
Concern floods easily, wondering all this was coming from. This isn’t one of the three Nathan’s you know.
There’s happy-go-lucky Nathan, the one who makes you laugh, and is mischievous-the one that has that charming smile of his own that melts your heart.
There’s downhearted Nathan, the one who gets frustrated at his life, at his situation, the one who retreats to the sofa and doesn’t talk much.
The third, that would be softhearted Nathan. The one who holds you like you’re the only person in the world, knows when you are in need of his presence.
This Nathan…you do not know. He’s despondent, far away, and his words aren’t convincing enough to let your worry slide.
“Nathan Hale, what has gotten into you?”
You return the hug, happy in his hold, but all he does is squeeze you tighter.
“Not a single thing.”
He smiles into the crook of your neck, hand coming to cradle your head.
“Think of it as nothing. It means everything to me, but you needn’t to know. Not yet. I am a little guarded, I will get there eventually.”
You raise an eyebrow, thinking that this may be a part of the story from last night.
“S’not a race, Nathan. You take all the time you need.”
He just nods, and you pat his back reassuringly.
“We all get where we need to go, regardless of pace.”
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gideonisms · 1 year
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I feel like if I could just communicate with bugs and come to an understanding perhaps it would not be so scary. If you are a spider and it's my house but you stay in your corner that is fine but see I don't know you'll do that do I?
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bees-tes-blog · 4 months
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yesterday I took it slow and just explored skyrim a bit. I liked hearing what gore has to say about the different locations we visited(he didn’t enjoy our province-wide mine tour). this shack we stopped at for a while on the shoreline of the pale could make a cute little player camp—I think it’s part of the fishing creation?
it’s really nice being able to watch the auroras through the roof and listen to the sound of the waves. realistic? practical? no. awesome? hell yeah brother
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stars-inthe-sky · 10 months
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How are things going post-move? How many boxes left unpacked? Anything hung on the walls yet? What’s your kitchen like? Said hi to any neighbors?
So far so good! Bébé's new daycare starts Monday, and I think things will feel a lot more normal and relaxed once we're all truly back in our routines and her various grandparents (who have been heroically covering childcare for the last three weeks) clear out.
There ARE some things hung on the walls, but mainly because the previous tenants left a number of nails and hooks behind, most of them in convenient places. The walls are plaster and I've been finding it unexpectedly difficult to hammer new nails in so far, so we're gonna see if the handyman can work some magic there.
The boxes question is complicated because there are some things we're just not planning to unpack, like gardening supplies (our current landladies are responsible for yard upkeep) and clothes and toys and things Bébé has grown out of but that we'd like to hold onto in the eventual event of a younger sibling—not necessarily in this house, though. Fortunately, we have a TON of space and had planned on storing such things, so nothing's feeling cluttered.
The kitchen is a good size and our stuff seems to fit! It hasn't been updated/renovated in a good few decades, so while I think the appliances might be newer, there's no island (an old IKEA table is doing that job) and generally it just needs some zhushing. But it's comfortable and serviceable.
That's been the case with the whole house, really—great for the year or two we intended to live here but not something we'd want to own, or deal with renovating in its entirety.
We've met a few neighbors (including the landladies, a married couple who live around the corner), and every single person has been lovely and welcoming! One next-door neighbor also has a very friendly gigantic black lab puppy, and Phoebe has seemed to enjoy racing him with the fence betwixt. (Benedict is big enough that I actually think she's more comfortable that way.)
Perhaps also of note is that there is a positively aces corner café literally three houses down from us on the main drag! We have all but moved in there as well.
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idk which school/hospital/library/corporate office needs to hear this but your bathroom facilities need to have doors that lock and toilets and sinks that consistently work and soap and towel dispensers that are consistently stocked and floors with undamaged tile that people can safely walk or roll a wheelchair over and there need to be grab rails and hooks for basic accessibility functions and there needs to be a gender-neutral bathroom that people can access without requesting a key or climbing seven flights of stairs with no elevator and there needs to be a safe place for women who cannot undress in the same room as a man to change and there need to be sanitary bins for disposing of menstrual supplies and there needs to not be broken glass just left on the floor for weeks at a time literally ever and yes, all of this costs money, but it is actually a good use of funds to make sure people can physically be in the building where your organization is located without compromising their health or safety or dignity. institutional recognition of the needs of the human body or i kill you!!
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party-gilmore · 7 months
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i know everyone on here has said it better than me but once again
the concept of a down payment on a house is so FUCKED
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