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#i was feeling insecure

mclennonlgbt · 2 years

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John's hard relationship with "Yesterday" (MASTERPOST)

1965: On August 1, 1965 Paul performs "Yesterday" on the TV special Blackpool Night Out. During rehearsals before the show, the Beatles entourage watches Paul run through "Yesterday" along with the stage crew. Afterwards John makes a "loud and decidedly sarcastic remark" deriding the song in front of everyone present. Beatles publicist Tony Barrow says the remark "upset Paul for several hours".

2. 1971: John came over to my loft one day and he was all excited,” [DJ Howard Smith] recalls. “He said, ‘I think I finally wrote a song with as good a melody as Yesterday.’” Sat at Smith’s piano, Lennon revealed he had a title – Imagine – but only a smattering of lyrics. For the rest he sang ‘scrambled eggs’. “He played it through and asked me what I thought. ‘It’s beautiful.’ ‘But is it as good as Yesterday?’ ‘They’re impossible to compare.’ So he played it again. And again. And he said, ‘You’ll see, it’s just as good as Yesterday.’ - Howard Smith, interview w/ Danny Eccleston for MOJO: John Lennon was haunted by yesterday, says confidante. (July 8th, 2013)

3. 1970: An excerpt from "God" from "John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band" album: The dream is over, what can I say? The dream is over, Yesterday...

4. 1971: An excerpt from "How do you sleep?" from "Imagine" album: The only thing you've done was Yesterday, and since you've gone is just Another Day...

5. 1971: John and Yoko celebrate John’s 31st birthday in their hotel room in Syracuse, New York, surrounded by friends and guests. John sings: Why he had to go, I don’t know, he wouldn’t say…

6. “Yesterday drove him crazy,” veteran New York journo/broadcaster Howard Smith told MOJO. “People would say, ‘Thank you for writing Yesterday, I got married to it, what a beautiful song…’ He was always civil. But it drove him nuts.” [x]

7. Real Life - demo (1977): Was I just dreamin', was it only yesterday? I used to hold you in my arms...

8. Playboy interview (1980): "I'd like to make at least one more album. And people know the songs from "Double Fantasy". We can go out and perform from "Double Fantasy" and the new album, rather than having to go back even to "Imagine" or we might do it, or even before "Imagine". I don't really want to go out and do... Yesterday... All my troubles seemed so far away... (sings jokingly)" [x] MY CONCLUSION: John's relationship with Yesterday, like his relationship with Paul, was complicated. He clearly appreciated the song as one of McCartney's best, but on the other hand he was very jealous and fierce, and even a few years later set "Yesterday" as a role model. Most interesting is the mention of "Yesterday" in "How do you sleep?". Lennon simultaneously challenges everything Paul has done, but is unable to deny that this one song is a masterpiece. Certainly an important factor was that "Yesterday" is the first Beatles song to feature only Paul. Newspapers declared: "Paul McCartney #1 without the other Beatles". This must have appealed to John's abandonment issues. Not only was he afraid he was a worse songwriter than Paul, but he was also terrified that he would be abandoned by McCartney and the other Beatles.

#the beatles #john lennon #paul mccartney #yesterday #jealous guy #imagine #lennon mccartney #i was feeling insecure #1965 #1970 #1971 #john lennon plastic ono band #competition #partnership #mclennon

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socialistexan · 1 year

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Hey all my food insecure and tight budget folks out there, Wendy's will be doing 1 CENT hamburgers May 26th through June 1st!

#obviously not just for food insecure and poor people but i feel like people need every break they can get

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nonasemporium · 3 months

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Gideon would not be some suave fuckboy picking up chicks like skittles and somehow having Harrow as the person that settles her--Gideon has been starving for home and belonging since before she was born, Gideon doesn't know how to interact with strangers even if she barks out something aggressive or recites some line she's read, Gideon nearly blacks out when a girl she finds pretty implies the most minuscule of interest in her.

Gideon is also, without question, submissive when it comes to her relationships, and while she spits like a startled cat at Harrow (rightfully so, I will point out, as their relationship before Canaan House was violent and cruel and oppressive), she responds immediately and desperately to even the faintest taste of approval.

Even when we're in her head, even when we see her make some brazen statement or thought, even when she lashes out and tries to be bigger and bolder than she feels, we still see how awkward she is. She's an unsocialized teenager without peers. She's an absolute mess with no experience. She's the isolated teen who learned everything from material marked as too explicit for her a bit too young and took the scripts of them and then nearly choked on the reality of talking to a pretty girl who wasn't beating the shit out of her in a circumstance she could rightfully resent.

She sat there wanting Harrow to kiss her so bad, Nona dipped down to offer her relief that fell hollow as soon as Gideon knew it wasn't from her morbid mistress of bones. She's a performative little shit. An anxious, floundering, helpless butch who is quite literally dying to have someone use her, want her, and who doesn't know what to do with it other than artlessly throw up her feathers.

#now HARROW #what holds Harrow back is being an incredibly repressed nun who needs to feel 'inspired' in some way to act #but she WILL act #and I don't even think she questions it a lot #she's had people hyping her up her whole life and I think her confusion with romance is less about feeling insecure #and more about feeling undeserving due to the nature of what she has cost and what her responsibilities are #gideon nav #tlt

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lunalivvy · 7 months

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jordan playing it off bc they think marie only hooked up with them bc their minds got messed with so they’re acting indifferent towards the situation even tho they obviously like her and she likes them back but now she thinks they don’t like her like that because-

#THE WAY THEYRE IN MASC FORM TOO #THEY USE MASC JORDAN AS A DEFENCE MECHANISM #i could go on about how jordan feels insecure or inadequate after being second place to luke and that’s why they’re so obsessed w being #first and they don’t think marie could actually like them even tho SHE DOES #THE ANGST IM KIND OF HERE FOR IT LMAOOO #gen v #the boys #the boys gen v #marie moreau #jordan li #limoreau #mariejordan #jordanmarie #ship

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nothingtoseeherebyeexx · 2 days

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CHOOSE YOUR FIGHTER!

i’m so depressed i act like it’s my birthday…every day!! 🥳

i’m so obsessed with him but he avoids me…like the plague!! 😆

i cry a lot but i am so productive…it’s an art!! 🥰

close ups under the cut <3

#i love them actually #sirius ‘centre of attention’ black #james ‘hopeless romantic’ potter #lily ‘suppresses her insecurities with academic validation’ evans #not sure how i feel about ttpd but i like some songs lmao #sirius black #sirius orion black #james potter #james fleamont potter #lily evans #jegulus #wolfstar #marauders #marauders era #fanart #taylor swift #ttpd

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shootingthe-stars · 21 days

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unfortunately for me i don’t agree with the headcanon that lily was insecure and thought james was asking her out as a joke but now people just think that’s what’s up. lily evans knew her WORTH sorry to disappoint

#she called james an arrogant toerag and said she’d rather go out with a squid than him #lily evans was a lot of things. insecure is not one of them #jily #lily evans #james potter #the marauders #marauders #also people making her plus size just to make her insecure about it feels strange i’m sorry #not saying she can’t be plus size btw i think it’s so cute when handled right

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rafeandonlyrafe · 2 months

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the pogues and the princess

words: 1.8k

warnings: drinking, partying, throwing up, protective!rafe, threats of violence, established relationship

“oh come on, don’t be so grumpy.” you poke at rafes cheek, his face downturned in a scowl.

“you know i don’t like you at these type of parties.” rafe sighs, slapping your hand away from his face as he concentrates on the road in front of him, wishing for once that he doesn’t get to his destination faster, wanting to keep you there with him.

“babe, i’d hardly call it a party. its just gonna be me, sarah and kiara… and a couple other people.” “yeah, the fucking pogues.” rafe grunts. “you know how i feel about you hanging out with them.” “oh please, i don’t even talk to jj or john b. i just miss my girls.” you pout. you got super close with sarah when you started dating rafe, which naturally led you to get close to kiara as well as sarahs other new friends.

“yeah, alright.” rafe grunts. you may not talk to the boys, but that doesn’t stop them from trying to talk to you.

“i’ll call you when i need you to pick me up.” you unbuckle as rafe turns down the driveway, leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. “i love you.”

“i know.” rafe sighs dramatically, hating that you’re leaving him, but not wanting to hold you back from seeing your friends, especially when you so rarely ask him. “i love you too.”

you wait as rafe gets out, opening your door and helping you down from his truck. he looks over your outfit again, glad that you’re very covered as he walks you towards the house, music already able to be heard pumping out of speakers.

“baby, this is not a little party.” rafe looks around, realizing theres a good amount of people crowded around the various seating areas.

“do you wanna stay?” you ask. rafe struggles, but ultimately shakes his head no. he knows if he stays that he would just end up getting pissed off at one of the pogues, and he values you too much to beat one of them up in front of you.

“mmkay, well i see kie.” you turn towards rafe. “i’ll call you in a bit. probably around 1 am if thats alright.” “yeah, i’m definitely not gonna be able to sleep until i get you back home.” rafe grunts. he’s in no danger of missing your call, there’s no way he will be able to relax until you’re back safe in his arms.

“bye baby.” you get on your tiptoes to press a kiss to rafes lips. “love you.”

“love you more.” rafe watches you walk away, literally skipping as you reach kiara, throwing your arms around her in a hug. rafe doesn’t see his sister, but he knows she can’t be far away.

“hey, pogues.” rafe walks up to a picnic table, jj smoking a blunt while pope and john b both hold a bottle of beer.

“rafe, don’t start shit-” jj begins, but he’s quickly cut off by rafe.

“shut the fuck up. i need you to watch y/n. if she gets hurt, i will fucking end all of you, understood?” rafe waits for all three of the boys to nod.

“im serious. i will fucking kill you. let her have fun with sarah and kiara, but don’t let her drink too much, and if any guy tries to talk to her or dance with her…” rafe trails off, but they get the point.

“she’s our friend too.” pope finally pipes up. “of course we will keep an eye on her.” “good.” rafe grunts, not saying another word before stomping away, back towards his truck.

“where is my kie kie?” your words slur as you stumble into the house, looking for your friend. “kiara!” you shout. “you never brought me back another drink you bitch!”

“hey, hey there.” jj suddenly grabs your shoulders, making you blink rapidly to get his face into focus. “maybe you don’t need another drink.”

“maybe you don’t need another drink.” you argue back, trying to wiggle out of jjs grasp. “i want a uh…” you look at the selection of bottles on the table. “shot of vodka!” jj knows you must be really drunk if you’re willing to take the shot, knowing how much you don’t like the taste of alcohol until you’re really far gone, always having to mix it with something fruity to get it down.

“okay, let me get it for you.” jj grabs a shot glass, keeping one eye on you as he shields what hes doing with his body, grabbing the vodka like hes going to pour it, but actually filling the cup with water instead.

“here you go.” he turns around with a smile.

“thanks!” you take the glass, knocking it back. “you know, rafe would not like you getting drinks for me.”

“hey, its all friendly.” jj smiles, patting your shoulder as you walk away to find kiara, yelling out again. he doesn’t see that you swipe a bottle from the table.

“i feel sick.” you shout at sarah, hands linked together. despite your words, you continue to dance, your stomach churning but there’s too much alcohol in you to care.

“i think if we drink more itll help!” sarah says, meaning to pull you towards the house, but you both stumble on the grass and end up falling on the ground, not feeling any pain as you burst out laughing.

“oh my god, we are sooo drunk.” you giggle, feeling a lot better now that you’re laying down, so you don’t make any effort to move, despite the stick poking your back.

“i know.” sarah pouts, before suddenly yelling. “john b!” it takes a minute for john b to make his way over, and when he finally does, he stands looking down at the two of you, hands on his hips.

“i think you girls may have had enough.” “sarah.” you turn to her. “i hate your boyfriend.” “me too, he’s trying to cut us off.” sarah rolls his eyes before reaching up, making grabby hands at john b, who sighs and helps bring her to her feet.

“come on.” john b tries to help you up next, but you frown, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by emotions.

“i don’t want you, i want my boyfriend!” you cry out, tears suddenly streaming down your face, leaving marks in your makeup.

“oh shit!” john b groans. “don’t cry! come on! lets call rafe.”

you finally accept john bs help up, tears drying up quickly when you see kiara, squealing as you rush away from the couple to link arms with her.

“shit, we gotta call rafe.” pope says, looking at you with concern on his face before glancing at his phone, the time ticking past 2 am.

“we should just take her home.” jj says. “i don’t have his number.”

“we can ask sarah…” pope looks around, before quickly realizing that sarah and john b disappeared together a while ago, and he’s not wanting to find them and break up whatever they’re doing for the sake of his innocent eyes.

“ill just ask y/n.” jj sighs, pope tagging along as he makes his way over to you, the last one dancing to the music, from the only speaker still playing.

“hey, y/n.” pope says softly, but you don’t seem to hear him as you continue to bounce around, hair long pulled out of the ponytail you arrived in, dress swishing as you move.

“y/n!” jj shouts louder, making you suddenly stop.

“what is it?” you blink rapidly, tears forming in your eyes from jjs shouting. “are you mad at me? is rafe mad at me?” “no, we just wanna take you home. its really late.” jj places a cautious hand on your back, guiding you away from the speaker.

“‘m not tired though.” you look to pope, hoping he would agree with you, but he shakes his head. no help there.

“how about we call rafe then, yeah? i think he’d beat our ass if either of us took you home.” “no he wouldn’t.” you shake your head. “my boyfriend is cute and perfect and nice and he wouldn’t do that.”

“alright, whatever you say.” pope rolls his eyes. he’s not willing to argue about the past, especially when he knows you’re way too drunk to even realize what you’re saying.

“ill call him.” you pull your phone out, frowning at the screen before your passcode suddenly comes back to you. rafes birthday.

you manage to navigate to his contact before the phone suddenly falls from your hands, thankfully landing on the soft grass. you barely turn away from pope and jj before you throw up, bending over as you spew.

pope moves quickly to hold up your hair, while jj picks up the phone, thankfully still open.

he presses the call button while watching pope comfort you as you begin to cry, sniffling out a mixture of words about how you hate throwing up and want your boyfriend.

“baby?” rafe answers, his voice soft but clearly tired and slightly on edge.

“uh… no.” jj answers awkwardly. “she’s ready to be picked up though she’s uhh… pretty drunk.”

“i’ll be there in five minutes.” rafe puts the truck into drive. he would never admit it, but he’s been just down the block the entire time, not wanting to go too far in case he needed to quickly get to you. “give her the phone.”

“yeah, alright.” jj hands it over to you. “its your boyfriend.”

“oh my god, rafe!” you shout into the phone, making him pull it away from his ear at your loud volume.

“hi baby, i’m coming right now to pick you up, okay?” “i love you so much.” you sob out. “i miss you, i miss you. i hate partying without you.”

“how much did you have to drink?” rafe asks.

“she snuck a bit more when i turned my back for one second rafe.” jj adds in, leaning closer to the phone to speak. “we really did keep an eye on her.”

“yeah.” pope chimes in. “one guy tried to dance with her but i stopped him.”

“wait, really?” you question. you hadn’t even noticed, or maybe just didn’t remember.

rafe doesn’t know what to say. he’s certainly not going to thank the pogues, but he’s grateful you’re safe as he turns down the driveway, headlights illuminating the three of you standing in the yard, the only ones still around as he throws his truck into park.

“yay!” you squeal, running over to rafe and literally jumping into his arms, making him stumble back as he holds you against him.

“hi baby, did you have fun?” rafe asks, rubbing his hand over your back as the other keeps you from falling. “i did but i drank too much and got sick and then starting crying because i missed you.” you explain quickly, all negative emotions gone now that you’ve got him back.

“should i get you home then?” rafe asks, glad when you nod enthusiastically, tucking your face into his neck.

rafe looks to pope and jj, nodding awkwardly at them. its the best thank you they’re going to get as he loads you into the passenger side of his truck.

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lindersliu · 1 year

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a little comic about missing major milestones, feelings of inadequacy, fear of failure, and the brain worms of it all

#comic #for what it's worth i think if u feel like ur in a slump now that just means ur golden era has yet to come :)#artist on tumblr #illustration #digital art #brain worms #apples to apples #relatable #insecurity #inadequacy #failure #mood

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martyrbat · 7 months

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i love you writers with intellectual disabilities. i love you writers who have a limited vocabulary. i love you writers who struggle with grammar and sentence structures. i love you writers who struggle with executive dysfunction. i love you physically disabled writers. i love you writers who have to have someone else do the typing/writing as you speak outloud. i love you writers who repeat themselves. i love you writers who have to take frequent breaks. i love you writers who are on hiatus. i love you all so, so much.

#you are all so very dear to me...#you all deserve so much better than the assholes that down ppl that may struggle with any of the above bc it makes them feel better.#but i hope they never make you too insecure to write or to share your story with the world.#you're just as much as a writer as them. your story matters just as much as theirs.#ransom note

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