#i still think it would be most at home in the cits but it's at the august wilson. oh well i'm gonna salivate over it anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sparrow-winged · 7 days

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I've been thinking a lot recently about stuff that could have been explored a lot more in Total Drama, specifically the antagonists of each season. I know that some of them did get additional depth and reasons as to why they are the way they are, but I think it could be really cool to see how much deeper it goes, particularly with "background antagonists" that cause their behavior. So enjoy my rambling about each villain/antag!

Chris - I'm not sure what happened there...I've always figured it was just the fame and stress of the show getting to him that caused possible underlying mental health issues to resurface. And because getting help could cause a scandal and ruin his reputation, Chris was kinda just allowed to spiral?

Heather - If I'm remembering correctly, her parents actually don't like her very much (like with the electroshock therapy and celebrating her not being at home). Although this is expanded on canonically, with Heather stating that her meanness is a form of protection, it'd be fascinating to see how far down that trauma goes.

Justin - I honestly think that one was also due to so much fame, and the idea that he could get away with stuff because he's attractive (although obviously, that failed later on). I personally think it's due to a massive ego fueled by his modeling and turning it into a form of narcissism.

Courtney - I'm mostly putting Courtney here because I feel like she definitely had a semi-antagonistic role in Action and All-Stars. I actually don't know much about her, except for working very hard, like with the CIT and student president stuff. I've heard that she had an abusive childhood, but I'm not sure? I haven't seen anything to back it up, but it would still be interesting to see why she got so aggressive outside of the love triangle.

Alejandro - I know there was some detail to his issues (that being José constantly belittling him and causing a strong inferiority complex). But I would be very interested in seeing just how badly José actually treated him as children, even as teenagers, to cause the manipulation in order to protect himself. Especially because presumably, his family didn't do anything about it. Although it's true that he doesn't necessarily have issues with most of his family (like how he mentioned Carlos and his uncle, without mentioning José during World Tour for the most part), it'd be very fascinating to see why they enabled this bullying and possibly abusive behavior to continue.

Scott - In all honesty, I never really finished Revenge of the Island, so I don't have much to say for him, except maybe exploring his background that caused him to sabotage the challenges and get into people's heads.

Mal - For me, it's not so much why he acts the way he does as an "evil" alter. It's actually why Mal exists at all. What could Mike have gone through to have formed an alter like that, especially considering his multiple attempted murders in All-Stars. (Same could be said for all the alters, honestly. What happened for them to exist?

Scarlett/Amy/Sugar - I actually haven't really watched this season. I guess I just didn't find it very interesting, especially with the idea that technically, I think there's three villains (Amy towards Sammy, Scarlett for the bomb threat, and Sugar...I dunno why, but I've heard she's supposed to be a villain).

Jacques and Josee - I still have yet to watch Ridonculous Race, although I intend to. But as I haven't seen it yet, I don't have a big opinion or anything to analyze, although I wonder if the fame got to the Ice Dancers, or if they're just assholes.

That's everyone (except for Bowie and Julia, because I have no access to the reboot and therefore cannot form an opinion, even based off clips), so if you somehow read this entire damn thing, good for you.

#total drama #chris mclean #td heather #td justin #td courtney #td alejandro #td scott #td mal #rambles

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pbandjesse · 2 months

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I had a surprisingly good day. Like nothing huge happened exactly. But I had a really nice time.

Part of it was I slept pretty good. I woke up at 650. Which was my new plan so I could leave at 720 and this worked out really well. I didn't have to rush. I got dressed and went down to see James. We chatted about the day and they sent me off to work. And it was a much nicer drive. No traffic at all. And I got to camp before 8. Amazing.

I was alone for a shocking amount of time. Like no one else came in until almost 10. But it was nice. I got a lot done.

After I printed some things I would spend most of the morning just working on my temperature blanket. I cut all the yarn for the last 11 days and it didn't take too long but it did take a good amount of the morning. And once I was done my knitting I worked on sewing down all the tails and ends from the January block. This took forever and I would work on that mostly consistently until lunch time. There were a few things I had to do. Specifically answer some emails. But I was mostly just focused on my knitting and my sewing.

I would finally get an answer about my awah class. And they had already given the class away and I felt super disrespected in the way they approached it. And I sent a pretty stern email, saying how badly this hurt my feelings. And towards the end of the day she would apologize. But I was very upset about how the entire thing was handled. It would sour the middle of my day pretty thoroughly.

I would enjoy my lunch and work on a few little things before our meeting with John the consultant. Me and Sarah would head over to the lodge to set up the tables but she had to carry 48lbs of aquarium salt to the nature building so I carried both of our laptops and mostly set up the space by myself.

We would sit in there and wait for everyone else to join us. And we talked about if we are going to continue being full time next fall. She doesn't think she will. Maybe part time. And I'm considering that option too. The thing about this grant is it was supposed to be a year but I don't know what that means. Like when is the end of that year. So I started looking into what types of jobs I might want to do. Looking at parks and rec stuff and studio assistant and work from home things. I think next year if I don't continue full time at camp I would enjoy being at the BMI again and doing some kind of computer based work l. Something I can do at home but not talk on the phone a lot. We will see what happens. But it was fun looking around.

Speaking of jobs. James did our taxes today and because my LLC made some amount of money this year we ended up owning $1500. Which honestly is not as bad as I expected. Still sucks but it could have been a lot worse. Would have been nice to get a tax return but I think those days are over.

John the consultant was fun today. I got to talk about the work I've done a lot and he seemed to recognize that I'm not just a talker, I'm a doer. I did get a little frustrated when we were talking in circles because we were calling one thing "village time" and one thing called "village program" and no one was clear about what the difference was. And Alexi and Heather kept talking about starting over with the schedule and while I don't feel precious about my schedule I don't think they understand what they are asking. Like they want more fill camp programs. And they want more free choice. But they still want everyone to do everything. And that can't work. So my big goal tomorrow is to start trying to figure out a way to do the impossible. And like they seem to think I'm sad about them not using my schedule. But that isn't it. I would honestly not mind restarting the schedule because it would give me something to do. What I am frustrated by is that no ine is being clear about what they want. I just want to have clarity.

The meeting was good though. He praised us about the teen job program. Formally the CIT "councilor in training" program. Now possibly the "Push" (puhtok ultimate service heros) program. We aren't sure what the name is yet. I just know we can't use my favorite one "Puhtok incredible service squad" (p.i.s.s.).

I let Alexi know I had to leave right at 4. And the meeting was starting to go over so after I was given my tasks for tomorrow (thank God), I ran out of there. Smiles and waves and I til next time.

It was raining. But not to hard. The problem really was the feild was very squishy. But I made it to the office and grabbed my stuff and headed out.

There wasn't a ton of traffic. And I made it home by 445. I was really happy to see James.

James was making themselves a burrito. I would have cereal and a cookie while we chatted. I would gather all my materials and James took them to the car for me. Carried my wagon too. Love my husband. I gave them a kiss and said I would see them in a few hours.

I drove over to Creative Alliance and had some trouble getting a parking space. So I had to park a little far away. But that was okay.

I actually got the time wrong! The program was actually at 630. So that was really good because their was a meeting in the classroom and I was worried I was going to have to rush set up but I hsd plenty of time.

I chatted with Parker and told him about my feelings getting hurt with awah and he agreed they didn't handle it well. And we just talked for a while. It was nice. He's very cool. I also learned that the cool girl at the desk is only there part time. Because on her real life she's a lawyer! What! That's so cool.

The women running the meeting came out in a rush apologizing about the meeting running late and I'm like. It's chill. But they kept apologizing and were super nice. They would end up taking my info to possibly have a private class. Super sweet.

I spent the next half hour setting up and working on an example. And soon my three students came in. And we had such a good time.

I talked about the history of toys for a bit. About how stuffed animals are different from other toys in form and function. And we got right into it. I showed them tips for fabric cutting and how to whip stitch and it was just a really great time. I would show them some sewing machine stuff. How to put eyes on their bears. How to do a ladder stitch. And we just talked and talked. All three women were fascinating and I really hope I get to meet them again because they were all so nice. The one girl has come to my last workshop and brought her sewing machine for some practice. She is taking a proper sewing machine class too. I admire her for jumping in so hardcore.

The other younger woman recently moved here from Chicago and she goes to theater project a lot!! Which reminds me I would like to go to theater project more again. I will have to talk to James about that.

This was a really excellent couple hours. And once we were cleaned up I checked if they would like me to sweep. They said no and I said goodbye.

I need a stop across the street to see if my missing check is anywhere. But no luck. I'll have to check with Parker tomorrow. See if they can just mail a new one here. I'll get paid eventually so I'm not to worried.

I got home a little while ago. James is playing DND with friends and will hopefully be done soon. I am very ready to go get a shower and get ready for sleep.

Tomorrow I have stuff to do! I'm really glad because it's rough begging for enrichment in my enclosure. But I have a direction now and that's all I need.

Goodnight everyone I hope.you have a great day tomorrow!!!

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mikimeiko · 2 years

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I've been mulling over this one for a while now.

After episode 8 there were a lot of comparisons between Calico Jack's story of Blackbeard torching a ship and Stede "setting fire" to the french ship. Some even went as far as suggesting that the look Stede gives Ed is of compassion and understanding, but I mean, look at them:

That is not the dynamic at play at all. Also, it wouldn't fit the theme of the episode of Stede seeing a side of Ed that he really doesn't like and Ed being terrified that the monster inside him will make Stede hate him (which I talked about at length here).

Most people just remarked the irony of Stede condemning Blackbeard's actions while having done basically the same things two episodes before.

And on paper they're not completely wrong, but the show was not framing it in this way and I also... didn't feel that the show just made a mistake? That they didn't kind of forget (cit) that Stede had also burnt down a ship?

And I think the answer is twofold.

The first lies in the genre clashing narrative of Our Flag Means Death, that @fuckyeahisawthat described brilliantly in this post. Stede is operating in a Muppet Movie logic: "Insane physical comedy and comedy-action where no one really gets hurt". He relishes in the just comeuppance that he feels he unleashed on those horrible people without a care in the world because they deserved it and he just had a chance to be the hero in his adventure:

He did this because they hurt Ed and it worked. Immediatly after this scene we are shown the ship on fire, we hear some people muffled screams (short, as they jump; screams of fear not pain) and splashes in the water while people escape the ship.

The scene is still pure comedy. We don't really fear for the lives of the frenchmen, nor does Stede. They will leave the ship and somehow survive surely (they managed to have a sophisticated party on a ship, they can manage a way home). There's no horror, no tragedy.

Compare this with Calico Jack's description of the torching:

The first thing he says is that the crew was trapped inside. Then he describes a nightmare scenario. He's trying to pass this as funny, like they did before with Hornigold's beating, but this time it doesn't work. Ed sees it for the violent and ruthless act that it was; he doesn't want to hear this story, and he really doesn't want Stede to hear this story. Jack is telling the story from his Jackass perspective, but Ed is hearing it from the outside of that world and he's reacting appropriately. The same goes for Stede: there's no place for this kind of event in his muppet movie logic, so this has to feel on the outside as well. And that I think it's why he can't possibly link this tale to his own revenge on the french nobility.

The second difference between the two situations has to do with agency and direct action.

Stede did not, after all, set fire to the ship. Sure, he did nothing to stop the fire, but all he did was reveal some sordid secrets. His intent was hurting these people by shaming them; he stopped Ed from doing them physical harm, and I don't think it was just that "Ed was in over his head".

Ed on the other hand? The way Jack tells the story, it would seem that he intended to burn the ship and might even have intentionally trapped the people inside. Then proceeded to watch (and likely enjoy, on some level) while those people where dying. It was an act of brutal violence, of intentional brutal violence. Did he have some reason to do it? Probably. Does it make it ok? No, it doesn't. This is a dark story and probably just a glimpse of what the monster inside of Ed looks like. It is not the same.

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holypapaya · 3 years

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Peaches (Konro Sagamiya x Reader NSFW 18+)

Fem! Reader

Konro and his girlfriend run home to escape the rain. When they decide to eat sweet peaches as a snack.

Warnings: age gap, denial, rough sex, oral play, begging

Skip to ** for sexy time. 2,000+ words.

________

God, how is she so beautiful? And, how in the hell didn't I notice her before?

These were the two questions Konro would ask himself repeatedly whenever he took Y/N out on their weekly dates. Unfortunately, the morning was a sweltering and humid day that overwhelmed the Great Tokyo Empire. Konro suggested that they have their date later in the evening to avoid the rain and the burning hot sun. Y/N's clothes hugged her glamorous curves as her skin glistened from a thin veil of sweat. The lantern lights that hugged the walls to local businesses created a soft glow.

Staring at her in awe was not a part of the plan. Well, none of this was a part of any plan, actually. Not even his life plan. They've been dating for a little over a month since Konro first met Y/N. His typical routine trip was to see Seamstress Granny to fix any rips in his uniform. That day he tore his pants while rebuilding Asakusa after the most recent Infernal attack. With his uniform in hand, he walked through the door, the bell ringing as it slid open. Just as he was about to call the elderly woman, he noticed the most beautiful, enchanting woman he’d ever laid eyes on. Konro was so stunned by her beauty that he didn't hear her greet him or ask what he needed to be done. Since then, he’s gotten to know Y/N well over time.

Before running her Granny's store full time, Y/N would visit Asakusa three times a week to help around. That’s why Konro found it unbelievable that he never noticed her before. Honestly, it was probably because of the increase of Infernal activity, but that was no excuse in his mind. Y/N stood slightly taller than most women in the empire and was curvier than other women too. Her full breasts always pulling at her shirt and plump ass tight, giving a slight jiggle as she walked. Despite all of this, Konro still towered over her. Don't misunderstand this, though; he is dating her not for her body but because he earnestly enjoys Y/N's company. Y/N made him feel things he hadn't felt in years or even within his lifetime.

Y/N's thumb gently rubbed the back of his bandaged hand as they held hands while walking down the street. Y/N was smiling greatly as she continued to talk. Konro wasn’t exactly the talkative type, so hearing Y/N talk brought him immense joy. The self-proclaimed hermit has found a friendly, outgoing puppy to love day in and out. Being with Y/N even made Konro feel young again. He's heard that having a significantly younger girlfriend can change a man's energy levels, but Konro didn't expect to feel this young. Especially his sex drive.

Being overwhelmed with work duties almost made him forget what a sex life was. Work. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. This was his routine for many years. However, when he was younger, Konro always managed to find time to "express his sexual desires" is a polite way of saying it. In other words, straight-up fucking. But as the years flew by and seeing Benimaru become captain of the 7th, Konro had more distractions, to say the least. With Y/N, it was different, though. She sparked something deep inside of him. In his many years of life, Konro never had the animalistic urge to make a woman cry, scream and mess them up during sex as much as Y/N. He almost had the chance too. Almost.

Last week, Y/N and Konro decided to go back to base for some privacy. During that time of day, mostly, everyone would be out making rounds or going out to eat, so it seemed like the perfect time. Right in front of him, Y/N laid bare. Her head bobbing up and down his shaft, her right hand moving in sync with her head, her left hand gently caressing his hip. Konro's deep blue eyes stared at Y/N, hypnotized by her beauty. Carefully, he placed his hand on the back of her head, adding a slight pressure, silently asking her to deep throat him. Which she happily obliged. That's when he heard it -the Infernal alarm. Y/N's eyes grew wide as she met Konro's. She released his now soft dick from her mouth as she watched Konro get up and hurriedly dressed himself.

It's only been a week since they've last had time for each other. Yes, they would greet each other outside or maybe have a small lunch if they had the time. But, they were never truly alone, just two people immersed in a chaotic world. Konro couldn't help but think about if he would ever get a chance to redeem himself. He could kill a man at this point to see Y/N's lush body naked in front of him again.

Y/N let out a sound of confusion, "Konro, I think it's going to start raining," she looked up at the sky after feeling something damp hit her face.

"Hmmm," he mused, still lost in his train of thought.

That's when he felt it. A sudden shower washed over the both of them. Y/N pulled Konro by his arm, leading him down a side street. 'Let's go back to my place,' she called back behind her. Konro followed her, watching droplets run down her soft skin.

'Please, one more chance,' Konro chanted in his head all the way to her apartment. As they entered the one-bedroom, Y/N handed Konro a fresh towel. Then, she walked over to the refrigerator, asking her boyfriend if he liked peaches.

** "Yeah," he said, watching her pull out the fruit and a knife to cut it. Y/N cut the delicate fruit in half, pitting it, and proceeded to slice it. With every movement, her hair stuck to her neck and shoulders. Konro walked over to Y/N, pushing her damp hair to her shoulder, exposing her neck and collar bone. His calloused fingers massaged between her shoulder and neck. He saw goosebumps wash over her skin and grinned to himself. Leaning forward, Konro kissed Y/N's jaw and noticed a slight coat of pink on her cheeks. Y/N pushed a peach slice towards his lips. As Konro was just about to take a bite, Y/N took it back and put half of it in her mouth. She looked up at the older man with what he thought was a look of innocence and lustful hunger. Y/N offered the other half of the peach that was sticking out of her mouth. With his large hand, Konro tilted her jaw up and took in the fruit.

On Y/N's bed, Konro propped himself up on his forearms to make sure not to put his total weight on Y/N. She laid beneath him in nothing but her bra and underwear. Konro was already halfway undressed with only his pants remaining. They kissed each other for a long time. While feeling his tongue slowly go in and out of Y/N's mouth, Konro imagined his cock doing the same thing inside of her. Konro continued to grind his hard cock into Y/N’s clad pussy.

Y/N let a long feminine sigh followed by a moan, feeling pressure onto her wet lips. She gently ran her nails down his abdomen, feeling his chiseled abs, before finally reaching his belt. She pulled at the material, hoping to touch his dick directly. Just the thought about touching it again caused her pussy to throb with excitement. Konro released her mouth from his and grunted in her ear,

"Not yet, baby," Konro nibbled on her earlobe, "Just wait a little longer. I'll treat you just as good as you treated me last time".

Konro moved Y/N's bra strap down her shoulder to have access to her collarbone. Then he nibbled and sucked until he left a light mark on her skin. Konro snaked his arm behind her back, unclasping her bra. Removing the material, he threw it onto the floor. Konro grabbed one of Y/N's full tits in his hand, gently but firmly. He flicked her nipple with his tongue, causing Y/N to inhale sharply. Frustratingly slow, Konro then started to suck her nipple, flicking it now and then. Y/N whined in frustration how Konro was still dressed.

He released her nipple, and while undoing his pants with one hand, he still massaged her tit with his other. Konro smiled down at Y/N almost wickedly as he watched her flushed face looked directly at his crotch. He kicked off his pants with one swift movement and found his way to Y/N's underwear, taking it off. Konro pulled down the thin material, excitement further boiling in him, realizing how wet Y/N was. She wasn't just wet but soaked. While kneeling, Konro grabbed her slender ankles, bringing her legs over his shoulder. Y/N's glistening lips in direct view of his face, and of course, his mouth. With a big lap of his tongue, Konro tasted Y/N's pussy greedily. He wasn't just licking her but also sucking on her drenched lips and swollen cit. Slurping and sloshing filled the room.

Y/N stared at Konro hazily, pleasure surging through her distracting her from any thought. She gripped her sheets tightly as her moans echoed. Seeing her boyfriend liked this not only made her feel wanted but happy. Konro has always been a very giving man. He gave up everything for Asakusa and Benimaru. So when the demon Infernal came, Konro didn't have to fight it alone. Instead, he chose to, for a simple but heroic cause. To protect the people he cared for. So seeing him eating her out hungrily and groping her body greedily made Y/N realize that Konro could express what he truly desired. He could tell her what he wanted and how he wanted it openly. Of course, in Konro's mind, he was primarily doing this to pleasure Y/N, but Y/N enjoyed seeing a different side of him.

Taking one last swipe at her clit, Konro lowered her legs, peering at his lover. A deep shudder swept across his body as he saw Y/N's face. Her cheeks flushed pink, lips slightly parted as her eyes stared at him dreamily—her chest lifting with every breath she took. Y/N looked absolutely decadent. However, she wasn't ready yet. Only eating her out wasn't going to be enough to stretch her for the pounding of her lifetime. Again, he grasped her lips with his own, tongue snaking into her mouth. Y/N let out a feminine sigh as her eyes fluttered shut as she was engulfed with pleasure. Her arms found their way around his neck, holding his closer. Carefully, he lowered his weight onto Y/N, causing her to open her legs further.

One hand trailed down her abdomen, finding its way to Y/N's sweet drenched hole. He flicked her inner lips teasingly before sticking one digit in. Next, he curled his finger upward, finding her g-spot. Y/N ended to kiss to arch her back in pleasure. Konro chuckled at her reaction, slowly rubbing the inside of her pussy.

"Just a little longer, baby. I need to open you up cause you're so tight."

He inserted another finger. He spread the two as far as they could, expanding her walls. Then he would bring them back together rubbing the top of her velvety walls. This went on in a pattern, almost like he was massaging the inside of her pussy. His rough fingers thick fingers felt so right inside of her. But there was something else that she needed with urgency. Something else belonged inside of her. Y/N grabbed his thick biceps, her head turning to the side. She bit her lip, begging Konro.

"Kon, please, please-"

He ignored her pleas, "Are you gonna coat my dick with your cum like you're doing with my fingers," he felt her walls tighten around him.

"Yes, I wanna cover your dick with my cum. Please", Y/N cried.

"Say my name, the way I like it."

God, he's so cute, Y/N thought to herself.

Looking at Konro softly, she said, "Kon-Kon."

Konro smiled with satisfaction removing his fingers.

He wrapped Y/N's thighs around his waist as he watched her quiver. Cock in hand, he rubbed the tip along her slit. Y/N's juices slicking his thick tip as pre-cum drooled out of Konro. Then he gently pushed his cock into her slowly as her walls stretched around him. Konro tilted his head back, moaning, feeling Y/N's velvety warmth grip around his pulsating member. Then, as Y/N let out a cry of pleasure, Konro stayed still just for a moment, letting Y/N get used to his length.

Gently, he caressed Y/N's face with his large hand, cupping her cheek. Konro rubbed her lower lip with his thumb.

"See, baby," he practically purred, "You're so wet you took me in one thrust."

Konro shallowly thrusted into Y/N's tight pussy wanting to see her reaction. Y/N rubbed her cheek into his palm, letting out a soft moan. To Konro's surprise, Y/N opened her mouth slightly, inviting his thumb inside. Then, she gently sucked. Konro took in a sharp breath, feeling his cock twitch with excitement. His Y/N was always full of fun surprises.

Y/N released his thumb, eyes glazed with sexual desire, "Kon-Kon, I'm ready."

Say no more.

Konro pulled his cock out before slamming back into her. Y/N dug her nails into his back as her eyes widen with surprise. She felt a knot in her stomach as her pussy clench down on his thick cock. She couldn’t hold back her voice anymore. A load cry escaped her lips. Konro looked his lover with a sensual but firm gaze. He was in complete control. He was the dominant one. Each thrust reached further and further back to her cervix.

Y/N’s loud moans matched the rhythm of each thrust, echoing in the small apartment. Her pussy aching in the most pleasurable ways. She moved her head to side as Y/N felt her body heat up further. Konro gently cupped her cheek again, turning her gaze over to his.

“Look at me, baby.”

Oh no. That was a fatal mistake.

Y/N felt her pussy clench as Konro’s deep blue eyes met hers. The slight curve of his dick ran over her G-spot mercilessly. His body warm, skin soft, muscles tensed. How did Konro go untouched for so long? There had to of been someone in the whole empire that tried to sleep with him. It’s unbelievable that no one had tried.

Y/N gently wrapped her arms of Konro’s thick neck, bringing him closer.

“Kon-Kon. Hold. Me. More. Go. Deeper. Please”, Y/N moaned between each thrust.

Konro smiled, kissing Y/N’s forehead. How could he say no to such a cutie. She even said ‘please’. Konro wrapped one arm around Y/N’s mid back, clutching her body to his. As his thrusts became deeper and wilder, Konro cooed soft nothings into Y/N’s ear as her pussy tightened and her moans grew louder and louder. Then her body grew tense, a small gasp leaving her lips. Y/N’s urgent moans came to a stop. Konro felt the wet walls that cloak his cock spasm as his girlfriend’s body arched up. Y/N dug her face into Konro’s shoulder, orgasm ripping through her body.

Swiftly Konro removed his dick to coat Y/N’s soft abdomen with his cum. He placed soft kisses all over Y/N’s flushed face, asking her if she was okay. Konro knew he wasn’t a small man, both in height and cock-wise. He cared about the well-being of his little puppy. Y/N ran her fingers through his jostled hair as she kissed his neck.

“You can go rougher, you know.”

Konro smiled. Noted: can go rougher next time.

#konro sagamiya #konro sagamiya x reader #fire force fanfiction #fire force smut #fire force x reader #konro x reader #fire force konro

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jaesqueso · 2 years

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member: ten

genre: smut

lyrics: “I’m gonna love you”

wordcount: 997

warnings: cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex

1.5k followers celebration drabbles ❤︎

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

“I’m so tired.” You blurt out as you let your body fall on the bed.

“Same.” Ten falls right beside you.

Who new moving in together would be so much work? You two spent the whole day carrying boxes and furniture so you are dreaded. But still, even if most things are still packed, you should still debut the mattress, right?

“Do you think you still have a little bit of energy to fuck me?” Scooting closer you kiss his shoulder.

“Yes, I do.” He turns to you, hand creeping around your waist. “But I’m not going to fuck you.”

Your whinny pout receives a smooch as his body moves to hover you. He gently takes a strand of your hair away from your face.

“Tonight I’m gonna love you.” Leaning down his lips meet yours.

The kiss is slow and sweet, taking your time to taste each other, getting drunk on your love. One of the things you most love about Ten is how he just understands you at every level, he always knows what to say and knows what you’re feeling, but he also knows your body like nobody else, he knows where to touch and how to touch you, like his body was made to love you.

His mouth slowly moves to your neck, sucking and licking in all the right places, leaving gentle red marks that would soon fade so he can just go back and do them all over again.

With hands roaming down your body, you feel your clothes slowly leaving your body and being thrown over the pile of boxes on the corner of the room, quickly joined by his own.

Ten licks his lips admiring your naked body and you can’t help feel your cheeks get out as you notice the spark in his eyes. Pampering kisses down your chest his mouth moves to one of your nipples as the other is taken by his hand.

Usually you’d be a moaning mess by now, a simple touch from his naughty hands and his delicious lips on your skin is enough to start a vast fire inside you. But this is your first night in the place you’ll now call home and you don’t want to upset the neighbours just yet. So you just bit your lip and close your eyes trying to hold in any noise.

Once happy with the job on your breasts his mouth keeps moving south as he softly parts your legs revealing your bare pussy that shines under the dim light in the room. Anyone would most likely be embarrassed for being so wet in such a short amount of time but you had gotten used to it, he knows just how to work you up.

With a smile Ten digs in, running his tongue through your slit humming at the pleasant taste taking over his mouth. His lips soon attach to your clit in a mix of sucking and licking that makes you grasp on the sheets as a moan escapes.

His hands keep your hips in place as you start squirming on the bed, feeling the build up inside you, nothing is going to break the delicious grip he has on your pussy right now. He keeps humming as if drinking is favourite beverage, the vibrations sending you closer and closer to the edge.

You finally lose it when his smooth fingers sneak their way inside you curling up just enough to hit your sensitive spot. Your back arches off the bed as your lips chant his name in pleasure.

Although his mouth leaves your cit not to overstimulate you, his digits keep moving inside you at a slow pace both riding off your orgasm and setting you up for the next one.

Going up your body, he kisses you making sure you taste yourself on his tongue, before moving you to your side and laying behind you. With his fingers still pumping in and out of you, his free hand wraps around his hard cock, stroking it as he kisses your neck.

Still trying to compose yourself, you sneak a hand between your bodies to replace his on his length. You feel a breathy moan against your skin when you spread the pre-cum on the tip before moving your hand up and down his shaft.

Getting closer to your second climax you want him inside you this time so you arch your back, moving your ass close to his crotch guiding his dick into your wet entrance. Ten’s fingers make space for his member, sliding to your clit to keep rub it as he pushes his hips against you.

You bite your lip hard feeling the stretch and knowing you won’t last long. Instinctively you meet his movements as his thrusts are too slow for the fire spreading inside you.

Not long after you feel your second orgasm reach you, you hand griping on his arm that drapes over your body to remove his fingers that kept moving on your clit. Ten holds onto your hips instead pushing himself inside you as further as he can, hissing at your walls clenching around his girth.

His shaky breath tells you he’s making an effort to last as much as he can but soon enough he’s pulling out and jacking off his cum into your ass cheeks. Still panting he reaches back to the shirt he was wearing earlier cleaning you both off as all towels are still packed.

“I love you.” You say at the same time, laughing right after.

Ten’s arms wrap around your waist pulling you closer for some cuddles. With a first night like this you can’t wait for your life together in this place.

☽ ・・・・・ ☾

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#cznnet #nctcreations #neosmutcollective #ten smut #nct smut #wayv smut #1.5k followers celebration

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broadway-heere-i-come · 2 years

Note

Would love to hear about the "Evan goes with Jared to summer camp the summer before senior year" idea!

The Newsies veterans will understand what I mean when I say "How I Spent My Summer Vacation" vibes...

- First things first, a bit of important background info: Jared’s camp skews older, taking kids up to age 17. This would be Jared’s third summer going there and his first working as a counselor-in-training. Different camps can have very different CIT programs; in Jared’s case, it means he’s still a camper, just with extra responsibilities and privileges. Most of his job revolves around helping the adult counselors run activities for the younger kids. His camp friends are also very real.

- The plot starts properly when Heidi, feeling increasingly worried about Evan's mental health and the effect that being isolated all summer might have on it, tells Evan that she signed him up to join Jared at camp. Jared's mom might have helped her get a deal on reduced tuition, possibly in exchange for Evan working in the kitchen part-time. Evan panics and protests until he realizes that he doesn't actually have a choice in the matter, then bitterly wonders why his mom couldn't just try to spend more time with him if she's so worried about him being alone. He feels like she's trying to get rid of him and his problems. Your mileage may vary on if Evan is in therapy by this point (I know some people think that he just started over the summer and I can't remember if canon confirms this or not). If he is, then Heidi might offer the break from appointments as an incentive for him to give camp a shot.

- Jared is, admittedly, also less than thrilled about Evan coming to camp. He's used to his camp world being entirely separated from his real world; when he's at a different place full of other nerds that he never sees anywhere else, it's easier for him to let his guard down. Evan being there to potentially throw that off makes him apprehensive. He's also probably gushed about Evan to his camp friends and is paranoid about him finding out about it. In any case, he's not going to be the one to get all excited when Evan is so clearly miserable about the whole idea. Before they head off, he tells Evan not to expect him to take care of him all summer.

- Jared and Evan bunk in the same cabin. Evan assumes that his mom had something to do with it, and he doesn't know if he's grateful or frustrated at having to be babysat. Move-in is a blurry overdose of new and too much. Jared is immediately swept up by CIT duties and reconnecting with his friends. (And yeah, Evan is kind of surprised to see that they actually exist.)

- Evan is utterly drained by the evening and can't work up the nerve to go to the welcome-back bonfire, so he hides back in the cabin even though he's not supposed to be in there unsupervised. It isn’t long before he’s in the middle of a full-blown panic attack, convinced that he doesn't have what it takes to handle camp and mentally scrambling for ways to get back home.

- Lucky for him, Jared is already doing a very bad job at not taking care of Evan all summer because he shows up at the cabin to check on him. And he brought Evan a s'more. It makes Evan cry harder.

- Jared objectively isn't, like, good at comforting Evan exactly. He's mostly freaked out but trying hard not to show how freaked out he is, and we know that he's shit at advice-giving. But he sits next to Evan until he can breathe again, listens to him ramble without saying anything insulting, and refuses to leave Evan alone afterward until Evan is ready to go to bed. It's a start. Things are a little different between them after that.

- The rest of the story would follow Evan slowly coming out of his shell throughout the summer. He gradually becomes more and more comfortable participating in activities, starting with the most solitary ones like swimming and eventually branching out. Nature hikes especially appeal to him, of course, so he still ends the summer as a Tree Expert. He gets to know Jared's friends and even makes a few of his own. One summer can't cure his anxiety, of course, but he does come away feeling a lot more capable of eventual recovery.

- Jared changes a lot over the summer, too, growing more comfortable with being himself and becoming a kinder person in the process. Working with kids particularly brings out the best in him, which Evan gets to see.

- Obviously, they fall in love, but they have to spend a lot of time slowly building up their friendship first. It's an absolute slow burn, but once they get there it's all the full-force, dizzying passion that a summer romance demands. And Jared abuses his key card access so they can make out in the computer cluster.

Send me asks about fics I've outlined/brainstormed but haven't fully written

#this one took a long time #hope it was worth the wait!#answered asks #dear evan hansen #kleinsen #jared kleinman #evan hansen #my writing

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sceptilemasterr · 2 years

Text

Endless Winter (ES Book 2) Act 2, Scene 1 - Portal to Home

Title: Endless Winter

Main Pairings: Estela x Ian (M!MC), Jake x Alyssa (F!MC)

Other Pairings: Craig x Zahra, Grace x Aleister, Michelle x Quinn, Diego x Varyyn

Genre: Full Rewrite

Rating: PG-13 for swearing, violence, alcohol, and sexuality

Summary: Lila brings news of a way for the Catalysts to get home... but can she be trusted?

Previous Scene: Valinorim

Masterlist: Link

INT. ELYYS'TEL THRONE ROOM - DAY

The next day, Varyyn, Seraxa, and Uqzhaal meet with most of the Catalysts within the throne room. Craig and Zahra are absent, as Craig is presumably recovering from a severe hangover after the events of the previous day’s celebration. Lila stands apart from the others, in a similar position to where the other Catalysts had been during the Tribunal.

RAJ: You’re sayin’ Rourke has a magic teleport portal?! ...Actually, now that I think about it, that’s not all that weird compared with everything else that’s happened.

LILA: Technically, it’s called a “Prismatic Interdimensional Transporter.” But yes, you’re basically right. With the proper power source--what you call the “Vaanusor”--the device could be used to instantly transport all of you home!

Jake crosses his arms and scowls.

JAKE (skeptically): And you expect us to just believe that? I dunno about the rest of you, but I don’t remember any magic portals back at the Celestial.

LILA: It’s not at the Celestial. Rourke has several facilities all over the island. The Gate is kept in his experimental research installation, codenamed “MASADA.”

ALYSSA: Yeah, this is smelling more and more like a trap every second.

LILA: No, I swear I’m not lying! I told you, Rourke nearly killed me! I did whatever I could to escape!

ALEISTER: That does seem in-line with what my father would do...

DIEGO: Where is this place, Lila?

LILA: It’s just off the tip of the island’s northernmost peninsula.

SERAXA: The northern reaches. The most dangerous part of the island.

ALYSSA: You’re saying this part with the sabertooth tigers, killer crab, and giant sea monster is the un-dangerous part of the island? Well, that’s just fantastic.

RAJ: I mean, this place ain’t so bad now that you Vaanti dudes are on our side! Do we even need to leave?

MICHELLE: Given the number of times we’ve almost died since coming here... I’d say “yes.”

JAKE: The real question is, can we trust Dimples?

SEAN: Varyyn’s the elyyshar. Why don’t we let him make the final say? Varyyn?

He gives Varyyn a respectful nod.

VARYYN: Hmm... There is much to think about when it comes to Auriga. I am not certain--

LILA: Wait!

She seems to suddenly remember something, pulling out her pack and rummaging through it. A second later, she pulls out another vaalta statue much like the others that had been seen, depicting a toga-clad woman riding in a chariot. Uqzhaal gasps in surprise at the sight.

UQZHAAL: Ah! This vaalta... it is yours--

LILA: Yes! I took it from Rourke’s collection before coming here. I know it’s important to you Hos--uh, Vaanti. You really think Rourke would let me just give this to you?

Uqzhaal approaches, and she hands the statue over to him. Ian and Alyssa both gaze at it curiously.

IAN: Keeper Uqzhaal... should we, y’know--

He mimes touching the idol. For a split-second, Lila tenses up, then sighs in relief a moment later when Uqzhaal shakes his head.

UQZHAAL: There is no need, Perseus. It shall be brought safely to the Temple of Auriga where it belongs, alongside the others.

ALYSSA: Oh, that reminds me...

She pulls out Sean’s vaalta and hands it to the old Keeper. A second later, Ian does the same with Michelle’s.

UQZHAAL: Excellent! We have nearly all of them now. This is truly a joyous day!

VARYYN: Yes, but still... I will need to think on all of this. Auriga, thank you for bringing this back to us. I will make my decision later, after conferring with... those I trust most.

He smiles briefly at Diego, who blushes and smiles shyly back. Then he turns back to face Lila.

VARYYN: Until my decision is made, you are to remain in the city. Understand?

LILA: Of... of course. Thank you.

Lila nods respectfully and nervously backs out of the council chamber. Taking their cue, most of the others do the same, aside from Diego. Jake shakes his head as he walks toward the entrance alongside Alyssa.

JAKE: I dunno, Princess. Just... somethin’ really rubs me the wrong way here.

ALYSSA: The statue, though. This is one elaborate trap if it involves Rourke willingly handing one of those over. Especially with how important they supposedly are.

JAKE: Yeah... (sighs) I just can’t shake this feeling. This all seems too easy.

ALYSSA: Y’know, Top Gun, there’s no law that says you have to be paranoid 24/7. It’s okay to lighten up once in a while!

Jake nods.

JAKE: You’re right.

ALYSSA (teasingly): Aren’t I always?

JAKE: Except for when you said I was asleep on the plane, which I definitely wasn’t--

She shoves him playfully.

ALYSSA: You were asleep, and I’m never gonna let that one go.

JAKE: ‘Course not. You’re too stubborn for that.

ALYSSA: Right back at you.

She hesitates at the doorway, catching sight of Ian and Estela a short distance away.

ALYSSA: Go ahead, I’ll catch up. I’ve gotta ask my brother about something first.

JAKE: Alright, Princess. See ya around.

He gives her a quick kiss before turning and leaving the throne room. Alyssa dashes over to her brother and Estela.

ALYSSA: Ian! Este--

Ian fixes her with a look, jerking his head toward where Lila stands just out of earshot. Alyssa quickly understands and drops her voice to a low whisper.

ALYSSA: Lila doesn’t know?

ESTELA: No. And I’d like to keep it that way, at least for now.

ALYSSA: Uh... this is embarrassing, but I kinda forgot your alias. Sorry. Guess I’m not used to friends needing to use--

ESTELA (surprised): I’m... I’m your friend?

ALYSSA: Well, yeah! Duh? Of course you are!

ESTELA: Sorry. I just... that surprised me, that’s all. Thank you.

ALYSSA (laughs): No problem. Anyway, your name...?

ESTELA: Oh, right. “Elena Hernandez.”

ALYSSA: Got it. Sorry. (no longer whispering) Hey, “Elena!” Hey, Ian!

Ian gives her a subtle nod.

IAN: Great. So, what’s up?

ALYSSA: ...Right, almost forgot. Ian, can I talk to you?

He and Estela exchange a quick glance. Estela nods.

ESTELA: Come find me.

She turns and leaves the throne room.

ALYSSA: Bye, “Elena!”

IAN (whispering): Okay, you’re overdoing it a little.

ALYSSA (whispering): Oops. Sorry. (normally) Anyway, I, uh... so y’know how I’ve been kinda scared about this... power thing we can do?

IAN: Yeah...?

Lila walks past them, leaving the room, as Alyssa holds up a hand and concentrates. Small wisps of energy dance around her fingers for a moment.

IAN (impressed): Wow! ‘Lyss, you’re--

ALYSSA: Yeah. I talked with Zahra the other day. Promised to stop being afraid of myself. But so far, this is all I can do... Got any tips? I mean, you yanked me back onto that log the other day, that was pretty cool.

Ian shakes his head.

IAN: All instinct. When I actually try to do anything, I can’t do much more than you. I mean, it’s gotten a little easier with practice, but...

He demonstrates, achieving a similar series of energy wisps with significantly less effort than Alyssa needed.

IAN: No idea how to scale it up.

ALYSSA: Damn. So what are we supposed to--

Their conversation is interrupted by Kele, having finally recovered from his battle with Cetus, entering the chamber.

KELE: Elyyshar! I apologize for my long recovery. I am...

He stops as he realizes Varyyn is still deep in conversation with Diego, Seraxa, and Uqzhaal, none of whom have noticed his arrival. Then he spots the twins.

KELE: As long as I’m waiting... Good to see you two. How have you been?

The Czasa twins look up in surprise.

ALYSSA: Oh! It’s you! Water guy!

KELE (laughs): It’s “Wave-Lord,” actually, but really I’d rather just be Kele.

IAN: Fair enough. Glad you’re back up and about. That stuff you pulled off... how many times do we owe you our lives now?

KELE: Doesn’t matter. I’m happy to help. ...Actually, speaking of helping, I’ve been meaning to talk with you two for a while.

ALYSSA: With us?

KELE: That power of yours. It’s a lot like mine. I suppose you wouldn’t mind some friendly advice?

ALYSSA: I mean, sure, but I don’t think it’ll help much. I definitely haven’t been able to control water--which is super cool, by the way. All we can do is--

KELE: No, no, that’s not what I meant. I mean that your power is a form of stoicheal energy, like mine. They function on the same principle, even if they manifest differently.

IAN: “Stoich”-what?

KELE: Where I’m from, there’s all kinds of people like us. Some, like me, control water. Others control metal, fire, air, earth, wood... The point is, you two seem to have what I would call Time Stoichi. Similar in effect to my own Water Stoichi, at least enough that I could give you some basic pointers. So?

Alyssa and Ian look at each other and nod.

ALYSSA: Sounds great! So, what have you got for us?

Kele reaches into his pocket and pulls out a handful of small berries.

KELE: These are mezzberries. Watch.

He summons a swirl of water in his hand. Then, with pinpoint precision, he sends the water out to perfectly envelop a single berry, holding it in place within a watery shell. A moment later, he snaps his fingers and the water evaporates instantly into the air, leaving the berry unharmed.

KELE: First step: precision targeting. Try picking one of these berries out of the group, then holding it in place. Okay?

IAN: Got it. Alright, let me try.

He concentrates, summoning the energy around his fingertips. Then, he squints, concentrating hard on one of the berries. A faint greenish-golden glow starts to surround his entire body.

KELE: Good so far!

IAN: And... here!

He points one finger at one of the berries. The power leaps from his skin and toward the set of berries... but instead of surrounding one of them, it slams into the whole bunch, scattering them all to the ground! ‘Lyss doubles over in laughter as Kele stoops to pick the berries back up.

ALYSSA: He said hold the berry, not knock ‘em all on the ground!

IAN: You try, then!

ALYSSA: Alright, fine! Watch this!

She concentrates, a similar glow erupting around herself much like her brother had done previously. Kele nods in approval.

KELE: Keep it up. You’re doing--

VARYYN: Wave-Lord! You’ve returned!

Kele looks up and smiles at Varyyn.

KELE: Indeed. I apologize for my long recovery.

VARYYN: Please, no need for that. Come. We have... a situation. We require your input.

Kele nods to the twins.

KELE: Keep it up, you two. I’ll have some more basic exercises for you later, alright?

He heads over to confer with Varyyn while Alyssa manages to capture two of the berries in a time-field. She concentrates harder, sweat beading down her forehead, when suddenly the berries squish together, exploding with a POP and spraying berry juice all over her face!

IAN (mockingly): “He said hold the berry, not make it explode into juice!”

ALYSSA: Ha ha, very funny.

She picks up a berry and throws it at him. It smacks him right in the face, exploding into juice.

IAN: Hey!

ALYSSA: There, now we’re even!

IAN: That isn’t how that works at all--

ALYSSA: Hey, if I have to be covered in juice, then so do you!

The two continue to bicker playfully as Diego watches them, laughing to himself. Kele, Varyyn, Seraxa, and Uqzhaal continue debating Lila’s claims, as the camera shifts to the platform just outside the throne room...

EXT. ELYYS’TEL - MORNING

Lila sits on a bench, her head in her hands, as she gazes out across the city. Taari sprints across a rope bridge just below them, while Sean and Quinn chase him, all three giggling and laughing. On a platform above, Jake helps a pair of Vaanti repair the damaged hang gliders. Raj busily cooks something over a large cooking fire, with several Vaanti civilians looking on curiously. Lila sighs as she watches everyone enjoying themselves.

ESTELA (O.S.): Lila.

Lila looks up in surprise as Estela walks into the scene and approaches her. She takes a seat on the bench.

ESTELA: So...

LILA: I don’t know what you or anyone else expects me to say. I’ve told you all everything that happened. Still, you don’t believe me.

ESTELA: Can you blame us? With everything that man has done...

LILA: I know. I wasn’t lying, Elena. He tried to kill me! The longer I stayed with him, the more afraid I got. That all it would take was one mistake, one wrong step, and I’d make Mr. Rourke angry... and that would be the end of me.

Estela’s expression softens. She nods in understanding of Rourke’s cruelty.

LILA: All I ever wanted to do was be a good employee! Do my best to help Mr. Rourke! And still... he almost shot me. Almost killed me. I... I...

Her eyes start watering. Estela hesitates before awkwardly resting a hand on her shoulder.

LILA: I’m sorry, Elena. I shouldn’t be... I should be stronger. Better. It’s my job to be cheerful, happy, optimistic. I’m a Rourke International tour guide! And yet--

ESTELA: Rourke hurt you. It’s okay to be affected by that.

Lila sniffs.

LILA: Thank you. You’re right. It’s just...

ESTELA: I’ve been hurt too, y’know. Rourke is not a good man. He puts on such a show for the world, yet deep down... I think we both know what he really is.

LILA: I suppose we do.

They sit side-by-side in silence for a few moments. Then, the door to the throne room swings open, with Ian and Alyssa emerging, both of them laughing and covered in berry juice.

IAN: Oh! Hey, Es--Elena. Lila. Hi.

ESTELA: Why is your face covered in... whatever that is?

Ian shrugs.

IAN: Mezzberry juice. ‘Lyss and I were practicing with our... powers. Turns out Kele is a pretty helpful teacher!

ALYSSA (shouting): Yo, Top Gun!

She sprints toward the nearest ascending ramp toward the hang glider platform.

IAN: Everything okay?

LILA: I’m alright. Thank you, Ian.

ESTELA: Yeah. We just... y’know, I don’t think she was lying about Rourke trying to kill her.

Estela stands up and moves closer to Ian.

ESTELA (quietly): Nobody can fake that kind of emotion. At least about that, she was telling the truth.

IAN: Good to know. Varyyn wants us all to gather again. He’s ready to make his decision.

INT. ELYYS’TEL THRONE ROOM - MORNING

Everyone has gathered in the throne room once again: even a tired, groaning Craig has managed to make his way down, being propped up on one side by an annoyed-looking Zahra. Varyyn looks down at Lila from his seat on his throne.

VARYYN: After much deliberation... I have decided. The Catalysts have done much for our people. It is only right that we help them return to their own people... and to that end, I myself along with my best warriors shall accompany them to this device. This way, we can ensure that the Vaanusor stays safe until it is time to use it.

UQZHAAL: After all, what better use for Vaanu’s heart than to assist their children?

Ian and Alyssa smile at each other.

VARYYN: We depart tomorrow morning. Seraxa, Uqzhaal, and the Wave-Lord are in charge of the city whilst I am away.

LILA: Thank you. I’ll guide you all to the Gate with the best of my ability, I promise!

ESTELA: I know you will. Thanks, Lila.

QUINN: This is so exciting! We’re going home!

She pulls Michelle into a hug as Furball darts around at her feet, yipping excitedly. Diego squeezes Varyyn’s hand.

DIEGO: Look at you, Varyyn! You’re really taking to leadership well. It suits you.

VARYYN: Thank you, my light. The burden of leadership is lessened with you at my side.

DIEGO: Yeah. I just wish this could last forever.

He sighs and gazes pensively up at the ceiling, knowing that at the end of their journey, he and Varyyn will need to go their separate ways...

_______________________

Scene Notes: And so Act 2 begins... with the journey to MASADA! Good thing the twins have finally started really learning to use their powers, thanks to Kele...

_______________________

Next: Climate Change

CIU Tag List: @brightpinkpeppercorn @endlesshero1122 @bbaba-yagaa @acidsugar0 @shaylan211 @griselda1121 @acanthisorbis @marmolady @choicesbabie @mauvecatfic

Endless Summer Tag List: @mysteli @edgydepressedchoicesthot @endlessly-searching-for-you @lovelywrites

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fallout4reactsblog · 3 years

Note

companions react to news of the institute christmas party courser revolution and the fact that the institute is now apparently populated entirely by festive rogue coursers in elf costumes and also what ramifications this has on the politics of the commonwealth as a whole. father's drowned corpse, still in his silly santa hat, is now impaled on the antlers of the fake reindeer on the sleigh prop by the institute's metaphorical front door as a warning and a symbol of their casting off chains.

Cait: “You have to at least give them some points for creativity.”

Cait pulls a face, but says, “I guess.”

“Come on, Cait. You could at least admit it’s a little funny. I’d have paid good money to be a fly on the wall that day.”

“It’s fucked up, is what it is. How are you so calm?”

“How are you so stressed?” They lean back in their chair, folding their arms contentedly. “They basically did our job for us. No more Institute.”

She sighs. “You’re nuts.”

“Maybe. I guess all we can do is wait and see what happens, huh? Maybe they’ll retreat to their underground hidey-hole and leave the Commonwealth alone.”

“Not countin’ on it.”

“You can be as pessimistic as you like. The way I see it, this is a good thing both ways. Either the Institute collapses without strict management- which would be good- the coursers decide they don’t believe in what the Institute was doing before and stop- also good- or we go in there and only have to kill half of what was there. A win-win-win situation.”

She shakes her head. “Whatever you say. I’m not buyin’ it.”

Curie: “The absurdity of the situation is certainly not lost on me, Madam/Monsieur, but surely there are still, ah, consequences for this?”

“Oh, sure, yeah, definitely. I mean, they’ve basically got my son on a pike on the CIT lawn. But, you know, don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things, as the old saying goes.”

“I... do not think this is a ‘petty thing’ anymore.”

They wave a hand dismissively. “We’ll wait for the dust to settle, then go check it out. Until then, I’m not jumping to any conclusions.”

“I am merely saying that, given the evidence, this seems quite disastrous, especially in terms of political instability.”

“Ah, who cares about politics? Unless they or someone else starts a war, it’ll be fine. Let ‘em live a little. Everybody’s gotta have a rebellious teenager phase at some point.”

Curie wasn’t sure this counted as being a rebellious teen, but if that was what brought sole comfort, she would let them have it.

Danse: Listening Post Bravo is quiet. That’s how he likes it, and how it’s going to stay.

Courser uprising. Of course, it was a courser uprising. What else could it have been? Those things are killing machines; death is everything they were designed for, and now they’ve taken the reigns and can do as they see fit across the Commonwealth with no masters to keep them in check.

He pulls himself a little tighter into his corner. God, what a mess. This is over. They needed to go back to DC and forget they had ever heard of the Institute. Tactical retreat. If Arthur wasn’t so far on his warpath, he might have even suggested it, but he was six feet deep in his “now’s the time to strike” speech with no sign of stopping to think about the hole he was digging.

Well, Arthur could do what he wanted. Danse has had enough of this, enough of the goddamn Commonwealth, enough of the synths, enough of it all. This was his home, now, and he was going to sit here and plant potatoes and forget anything that happened outside. Especially the fact that coursers even existed and could, presumably, come knocking on his door at any moment.

He was going to make an effort to forget that first.

Deacon: He lets out a long, low, whistle, then turns to Dez. “We should’ve thought of that one first, Boss. It’s genius.”

“It’s madness.” Desdemona pinches the bridge of her nose. “But I suppose it works in our favor, at least for now. There should be chaos in the Institute right about now.”

“Other synths probably saw the carnage.” Glory pipes up. “They might be getting some similar ideas. This could be our moment.”

“Who would’ve predicted this, though?” Deacon grins. “It’s so out there that I can’t even be surprised that it happened. I mean, tell me “Holiday Office Party Leads to Destruction of Commonwealth Boogeyman” doesn’t sound like a headline you’d see in the Publick these days. It’s the perfect brand of Commonwealth crazy.”

“The Brotherhood is going to want to get on this,” Carrington says, shooting a glare Deacon’s direction. “We need to act before they can get there.”

“I’ve reached out to our man on the inside,” Deacon replies, glaring back. “But until we hear back, we might as well enjoy the show.”

Dez shakes her head. “I suppose so.”

Gage: “Honestly? Can’t blame ‘em. That holiday party sounds like an actual nightmare. I’d kill someone if they stuck elf ears on me, too.”

“Damn. There go my plans for next Christmas.”

Sole’s tone is dry enough he can’t tell if they’re joking. “I’m serious, Overboss. You even look at me with a costume-”

“I value my life, thanks.”

“Just providin’ fair warning. I don’t think any of the others would take kindly to it, either.”

They shake their head. “Mason wouldn’t mind. He practically dresses up in a costume every day.”

“Are you shitting me? He’d be the one that hated it the most.”

“Absolutely not. Mags would hate it the most.”

He thinks about it a moment, then replies, “Fair point, but what about Nisha?”

Sole sucks in a tense breath. “Oh, that’d be a mess. A bloody, ugly mess. Moral of the story: no holiday parties.”

“Good advice.”

Hancock: “I mean, good for them?” He stares at the ceiling, still a little baffled. “I guess?”

“But what does this mean, John?” Fahrenheit lights up a cigarette across from him.

“Well, we’ll be fine. I have that on good authority. Everybody else...” He makes a face.

“Exactly. No one knows.”

“No one even knew this was an option.” Smoke hisses between his teeth. “I mean, it’s fitting that they’d go up in smoke because of their own arrogance, but still.”

“People are losing it.”

He snorts. “Think of the Brotherhood. They must be havin’ a real heyday over there. But us? We’ll be fine. That’s what matters, right?”

“That’s what matters.”

MacCready: “I honestly don’t know what to say.”

Sole shrugs. “Then don’t say anything. I’m still not sure how I feel about it myself.”

“This is a good thing, right?” He looks to them for some explanation. “Right?”

“It’s too early to say, yet.”

“’Too early to say’? It’s a courser uprising for crying out loud. Forget what I said. This is bad.”

“Could turn out to be good, though.”

“Okay, it could, but...” he shakes his head. “What the heck. You’re right. We’ll see.”

Still, it’s a messed-up way to go. The only thing worse than being killed by a courser, he imagines, is being killed by a courser dressed up as a holiday elf.

Nick: He blinks slowly, purses his lips, then carefully folds his newspaper and puts it to the side.

“I beg your pardon?”

“I know. Crazy, huh?” Sole pops the cap off a Nuka-Cola and takes a seat on his desk. “All it took was a Christmas party.”

“I gotta say, this wasn’t among the ways I thought the Institute would go. Up in a firey ball, sure, but at the hands of killing machines dressed as Santa’s elves?”

“That’s what makes it so great! No one saw this coming, the Institute least of all, I assume. Can you imagine the mess that must be happening at Boston Airport right now? The Brotherhood is shitting their pants as we speak.”

He just shakes his head. “We can close that case, I guess. I’m not sure if I should be happy for them or horrified at the circumstances. Still, we should be careful; it’ll be hard to know what a change in leadership means for us.”

“Sure, sure.”

“I’ll give ‘em credit for creativity, though.”

Piper: This is the best thing to happen all year.

For once, papers are flying off the shelves. She’s selling copies right off the press, selling them before they’re even printed. She’s on backorder for the story of the festive courser rebellion, which she’d heard all the details about from a Diamond City guard wearing suspiciously Deacon-like sunglasses. But forget him.

People have traveled to get here and get their hands on the Publick. There’s someone from Bunker Hill sitting next to someone from Cambridge next to someone who said they came from the Glowing Sea, of all places. The caps she’s making is more than she could have ever imagined, and she’s glad she faced sleep deprivation to make this one a Publick Occurrences exclusive. It’s been well worth it so far. Nat doesn’t even have to stand on the street to hawk the paper, people are coming right up to her door and knocking, no joke.

She knew the war would be profitable, but it’s made even better by the way it all went down. A holiday party gone wrong is the perfect headline, and if she could find a courser, she’d kiss them for their genius. Because this is the best thing to happen to her since she not-so-subtly implied McDonough was a synth.

Bless the coursers of the Institute for their impeccable sense of style.

Preston: “I have to say, I didn’t expect to be crossing ‘take care of the Institute’ off of my to-do list so quickly.”

Sole cocks their head to the side. “I mean, it’s not gone yet. Just... under new management.”

“New management, new threat in my opinion. You can’t really believe everything is going to stay the same after this. The Institute is going to change in at least a couple of ways.”

“Fair.” They lean up against the workbench. “Kinda crazy how it all went down, though.”

He chuckles. “I’d call that an understatement, General. No one could’ve seen this one coming. Trigger-happy Brotherhood goes on the warpath? I thought we might see that one, but blowing up from the inside?” He shakes his head. “That’s a new one.”

“They kinda had it coming, though. Who thought making killing machines play Barbie was a good idea?”

“Someone who came to regret it, no doubt.”

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yoursexysweetcadaver · 4 years

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Justice for Matthew Rushin - Black Autistic Lives Matter! #BLM #Justice4MatthewRushin

Hello there I have not seen any mention of what happened to Matthew Rushin on Tumblr yet so, I’m making this post hoping it gains traction. PLEASE signal boost, take your time to read and donate if you can or share, because this is a MASSIVE injustice and it needs to be spread around more. I don’t have many (active) followers so I don’t know how far this will go, but I’m hoping more people see this so please if you do see this, share and follow their social medias we need justice for Matthew ASAP. He is experiencing vision loss and other symptoms related to a cyst in his brain that required medical care when he was and still is in his cell. I am going to keep my words brief, to give more voice to the family as they speak and explain best about what has been going on. There is an email template in this post that you can use to send to Virginia representatives (also listed), a GoFundMe link. This is all taken from the family’s Facebook post and photos.

Also please feel free to add more hashtags, I added what I came up with.

I’m not only fighting for my son Matthew Rushin but for all those who have been wrongfully convicted. Laws must change to protect those with disabilities and our legislators must be held accountable to make these changes. We have to protect those with disabilities and not let the police (Virginia Beach Detective Jessica Hosang)/prosecutors (Colin Stolle, & Michael DeFricke)take advantage of them! They have stolen the music from my life!

Entire Washington Post link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/video/local/how-a-black-autistic-man-is-serving-10-years-in-prison-for-a-car-crash/2020/09/10/7f86aed2-5a58-475d-a806-3957ee3bdb2c_video.html?fbclid=IwAR2UcNCjCELk1F-3YuwQodKTyhoKSnEA0ASnuvNqfoAgDUwtEE1U3_B0Cpc

MEET MY SON MATTHEW RUSHIN: Matthew is a black, autistic twenty-two year old male who was & is still a model citizen even in prison. He beat all kinds of odds against him: black, autistic, ADHD, anxiety, a traumatic brain injury(TBI) in 2017 that left him comatose for several days, & which required rehabilitation in order for him to re-learn life functions, including walking & talking. A pituitary cyst was discovered during evaluation & treatment for the TBI. The single car accident which resulted in the TBI has left him with PTSD. Despite all of these challenges, Matthew graduated with honors from high school, was employed & was an engineering student at ODU. He participated in numerous volunteer activities. He is a gifted pianist, plays the viola beautifully, & he composes music and writes poems. Matthew was sentenced to 50 years (to serve 10) for a nonfatal, unintentional car accident involving no drugs or alcohol. If you are thinking there must be more to the story, there is. One of Matthew’s autistic processes is called Echolalia, which causes him to repeat words that he hears. After the car accident, Matthew stepped out of his car & was met by an angry driver who cursed at him and repeatedly yelled at him “are you f***ing trying to kill yourself?” In his distressed state, Matthew repeated these man’s words about suicide: words that were used to turn a car accident into a crime. Matthew was charged with 2nd degree murder with a claim that the accident was an intentional attempt to kill himself by deliberately driving head-on into another car. Officers did not exhibit any understanding of autism in their interpretations of Matthew’s comments and actions. Instead, they took advantage of his vulnerability as they handcuffed him, questioned him for nearly 4 hours at the scene, lied to him about evidence, isolated him from his family. A forensic engineer and traffic collision reconstructionist with 33 years’ experience has written a report detailing the ways the Commonwealth’s suicide determination as a cause for the accident is NOT a plausible explanation. Facing the terrifying prospect of a jury trial, Matthew was pressured to plead guilty to crimes he didn’t commit, led to believe it would allow him to go home. He was never properly treated or evaluated, and his health and disability were never properly considered. Today, Matthew sits in prison without an understanding of why he is there. Matthew and his family have immense compassion for the individuals wounded in the January 2019 car crash, especially the man with the most severe and sustaining injuries. Their thoughts are with these individuals daily. But Matthew is not a danger to society. He is highly vulnerable in the brutal prison environment as a man with a disability. And he faces the possibility of permanent blindness or even death due to an untreated brain cyst. Help Matthew's family bring him home. Ask Governor Northam to grant Matthew an Absolute Pardon and do whatever it takes to free him today!

************************* SAMPLE EMAIL************************** I am writing to you because I feel passionately that Matthew Rushin, a gentle young man with neurological processing differences that accompany autism spectrum disorder, should NOT be behind bars. Please review his case. A nonfatal car accident that involved NO drugs or alcohol, a young man with autism who has never before been in trouble with the law. This is someone who should NOT have been sentenced to 50 years and now spending a decade of his life in jail with violent offenders all because of a driving mistake. Furthermore, it is highly likely that the accident even occurred because of his losing consciousness due to a seizure. A forensic engineer and traffic collision reconstructionist with 33 years experience has written a report detailing the ways the commonwealth’s suicide determination as a cause for the accident is NOT a plausible explanation: https://neuroclastic.com/.../2020/06/rushin-engineer.pdf... This is also what Matthew repeatedly told officers during his interrogation, when he should have been receiving medical care. At the scene of the accident, Matthew repeated words that were screamed at him. Echolalia is a method many with autism use for processing situations. This involves them repeating what someone has said to them. Matthew did this, and he was convicted because of it, rather than for the actual facts of the case that illustrated it was indeed an unintentional car accident. Please review his case. He needs medical attention for the cyst on his brain. He is experiencing headaches and transient blindness, and his medical care for this is long overdue. Please do not let him die in jail. This young man has been criminalized and had his life destroyed. He has a history of being a model citizen prior to this accident - honors in high school, an engineering college student, a volunteer. He needs medical care for the cyst on his brain and is experiencing transient blindness and short term memory loss, further exacerbated by his recent assault in jail by another inmate. Please do what you can to help. Prison offers the VA community nothing in terms of betterment by keeping him locked up and potentially killing him because of lack of medical care and his vulnerability as a young man with disabilities in a brutal environment. Help his family bring him home. The injuries incurred to the victims involved, particularly the man with the most severe and sustaining injuries, are horrible. But the punishment is above and beyond inhumane and unproductive for Matthew Rushin to be sentenced to 50 years and serving 10 for a nonfatal car accident involving no drugs or alcohol.

******************************************************************************************* These are critical points: 1. Matthew was not taken for medical (and mental health evaluation) the evening of the crash. He has lost consciousness, had a prior serious brain injury, was banged up around the face and bleeding, was not making sense - yet, instead of taking him for evaluation and care, the police handcuffed and interrogated him for nearly 4 hours at the scene, then more at the police station (with lies and manipulation). He still has not had the physical evaluation he should have had that day - despite the fact that he has a cyst on his pituitary gland that was due evaluation the month he was jailed (19 months ago), AND he is having severe headaches, dizziness and temporary blindness. 2. Virginia Beach Police Department has a CIT (Crisis Intervention Team) program that is supposed to divert people with mental illness or in mental health crises to treatment rather than the criminal system. Not only did they not activate that team despite his history of PTSD, anxiety and his symptoms at the scene AND the fact that they were going to charge him with attempted 2nd degree murder on the basis of a suicide attempt (unfounded!), the woman how did much of the interrogation - which included lies about the evidence they had, and pretending that she was his friend - is a trainer for their CIT program. Further, suicidology must be determined by psychologist or psychiatrist. It was not - and wouldn't have been. They were able to maintain that charge, because after 7 months of jail, when Matthew was told that if he signed the plea deal, he could go home - that was his understanding - he signed it. From that point forward, the prosecutor, judge and press referred to the "fact" that he admitted he deliberately ran into the other car because he was trying to kill himself. Officer Hosang only has 12 hours of Autism training, it takes psychologists years undergraduate education, graduate education and a whole lot of certification to even be able to practice. Officer Hosang told Matthew as heard in the interrogation, she hopes to arrest and charge him. What CIT does that? Is that descalating the issue? Um.. no way! 3. Mental health services have not been provided. Medication for anxiety was provided after months, but not counseling/treatment. Matthew has not had the required neurology follow up for his conditions identified prior to his incarceration. 4. Matthew and his family have not been able to talk face to face for 19 months, let alone hug. This 20 year old autistic man who had just been in a very serious car accident and who was clearly physically impacted was not allowed the comfort of his family. His dad was at the scene for hours waiting to be allowed to see his son. He wasn't even told when they took Matthew away from the scene. Mr. Rushin found out 45 minutes later. 5. Matthew was ripped from his life on the basis of an unsubstantiated claim, denied his rights, taken advantage of and taken straight to prison for a charge that never should have been made. Yet when there is overwhelming evidence of all of the wrongdoing, he remains in prison. That is totally unbalanced. He was judged guilty on sight. But it is taking months to free him. This is so wrong. ________________________________________________________________________________ (1) GOVERNOR RALPH NORTHAM EMAIL: [email protected] CALL: (804) 786-2211 (2) COUNSEL TO GOVERNOR NORTHAM Legal Counsel Rita Davis [email protected] (3) Kelly Thomasson: Secretary of the Commonwealth EMAIL: [email protected] CALL: (804) 786-2441 Fax: 804-786-7441 (4) Tonya D. Chapman: Chair of the Virginia Parole Board EMAIL: [email protected] CALL: 804-674-3081 (5) PAROLE BOARD [email protected] (6) Brian Moran: Secretary of Public Safety and Homeland Secretary CALL: Office: 804-786-5351 EMAIL: [email protected] (6) Mark R. Herring: Virginia Attorney General EMAIL: [email protected] CALL: (804)786-2071 ****************************************************************** (1) PETITION LINK: (DO NOT DONATE TO THE PETITION, ONLY SHARE) http://chng.it/gvNy5rJ77H

(2) GOFUNDME FOR LEGAL AND EXPERT FEES (ZERO THE TIP FEE: DO NOT ADD A TIP): we still need financial assistance! We appreciate everyone ❤️ https://gf.me/u/yjwwty

(3 PAYPAL: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/Dance4Matthew

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a-book-dragon · 3 years

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A.2.17 Aren’t most people too stupid for a free society to work?

- Anarchy Works, FAQ

We are sorry to have to include this question in an anarchist FAQ, but we know that many political ideologies explicitly assume that ordinary people are too stupid to be able to manage their own lives and run society. All aspects of the capitalist political agenda, from Left to Right, contain people who make this claim.

Be it Leninists, fascists, Fabians or Objectivists, it is assumed that only a select few are creative and intelligent and that these people should govern others.Usually, this elitism is masked by fine, flowing rhetoric about “freedom,” “democracy” and other platitudes with which the ideologues attempt to dull people’s critical thought by telling them what they want to hear.It is, of course, also no surprise that those who believe in “natural” elites always class them-selves at the top. We have yet to discover an “objectivist”, for example, who considers themselves part of the great mass of “second-handers” (it is always amusing to hear people who simply par-rot the ideas of Ayn Rand dismissing other people so!) or who will be a toilet cleaner in the unknown “ideal” of “real” capitalism.

Everybody reading an elitist text will consider him or her-self to be part of the “select few.” It’s “natural” in an elitist society to consider elites to be natural and yourself a potential member of one!Examination of history shows that there is a basic elitist ideology which has been the essential rationalisation of all states and ruling classes since their emergence at the beginning of the Bronze Age

(“if the legacy of domination had had any broader purpose than the support of hierarchical and class interests, it has been the attemp to exorcise the belief in public competence from social discourse itself.”[Bookchin,The Ecology of Freedom, p. 206]).

This ideology merely changes its outer garments, not its basic inner content over time.

During the Dark Ages, for example, it was coloured by Christianity, being adapted to the needs of the Church hierarchy. The most useful “divinely revealed” dogma to the priestly elite was“original sin”: the notion that human beings are basically depraved and incompetent creatures who need “direction from above,” with priests as the conveniently necessary mediators between ordinary humans and “God.” The idea that average people are basically stupid and thus incapable of governing themselves is a carry over from this doctrine, a relic of the Dark Ages.

In reply to all those who claim that most people are “second-handers” or cannot develop any-thing more than “trade union consciousness,” all we can say is that it is an absurdity that cannot withstand even a superficial look at history, particularly the labour movement. The creative powers of those struggling for freedom is often truly amazing, and if this intellectual power and inspiration is not seen in “normal” society, this is the clearest indictment possible of the deadening effects of hierarchy and the conformity produced by authority. (See also section B.1 for more on the effects of hierarchy). As Bob Black points outs:

“You are what you do. If you do boring, stupid, monotonous work, chances are you’ll end up boring, stupid, and monotonous. Work is a much better explanation for the creep-ing cretinisation all around us than even such significant moronising mechanisms astelevision and education. People who are regimented all their lives, handed to workfrom school and bracketed by the family in the beginning and the nursing home in theend, are habituated to hierarchy and psychologically enslaved. Their aptitude for auton-omy is so atrophied that their fear of freedom is among their few rationally groundedphobias. Their obedience training at work carries over into the familiestheystart, thusreproducing the system in more ways than one, and into politics, culture and everythingelse. Once you drain the vitality from people at work, they’ll likely submit to hierarchyand expertise in everything. They’re used to it.”[The Abolition of Work and other essays, pp. 21–2]92

When elitists try to conceive of liberation, they can only think of it beinggivento the oppressed by kind (for Leninists) or stupid (for Objectivists) elites. It is hardly surprising, then, that it fails. Only self-liberation can produce a free society. The crushing and distorting effects of authority can only be overcome by self-activity. The few examples of such self-liberation prove that most people, once considered incapable of freedom by others, are more than up for the task.Those who proclaim their “superiority” often do so out of fear that their authority and power will be destroyed once people free themselves from the debilitating hands of authority and come to realise that, in the words of Max Stirner,“the great are great only because we are on our knees. Let us rise”

As Emma Goldman remarks about women’s equality,“[t]he extraordinary achievements of women in every walk of life have silenced forever the loose talk of women’s inferiority. Those who still cling to this fetish do so because they hate nothing so much as to see their authority challenged.This is the characteristic of all authority, whether the master over his economic slaves or man over women. However, everywhere woman is escaping her cage, everywhere she is going ahead with free,large strides.”[Vision on Fire, p. 256]

The same comments are applicable, for example, to thevery successful experiments in workers’ self-management during the Spanish Revolution.Then, of course, the notion that people are too stupid for anarchism to work also backfires on those who argue it.

Take, for example, those who use this argument to advocate democratic government rather than anarchy. Democracy, as Luigi Galleani noted, means “acknowledging the right and the competence of the people to select their rulers.”

However,“whoever has the political competence to choose his [or her] own rulers is, by implication, also competent to do without them,especially when the causes of economic enmity are uprooted.”[The End of Anarchism?, p. 37]

Thus the argument for democracy against anarchism undermines itself, for “if you consider these worthy electors as unable to look after their own interests themselves, how is it that they know howto choose for themselves the shepherds who must guide them? And how will they be able to solve this problem of social alchemy, of producing the election of a genius from the votes of a mass of fools?”[Malatesta,Anarchy, pp. 53–4]

As for those who consider dictatorship as the solution to human stupidity, the question arises why are these dictators immune to this apparently universal human trait? And, as Malatesta noted,“who are the best? And who will recognise these qualities in them?”[Op. Cit., p. 53]

If they impose themselves on the “stupid” masses, why assume they will not exploit and oppress the many for their own benefit? Or, for that matter, that they are any more intelligent than the masses? The history of dictatorial and monarchical government suggests a clear answer to those questions.

A similar argument applies for other non-democratic systems, such as those based on limited suffrage. For example, the Lockean (i.e. classical liberal or right-wing libertarian) ideal of a state based on the rule of property owners is doomed to be little more than a regime which oppresses the majority to maintain the power and privilege of the wealthy few.

Equally, the idea of near universal stupidity bar an elite of capitalists (the “objectivist” vision) implies a system somewhat less ideal than the perfect system presented in the literature. This is because most people would tolerate oppressive bosses who treat them as means to an end rather than an end in themselves. For how can you expect people to recognise and pursue their own self-interest if you consider them fundamentally as the“uncivilised hordes”? You cannot have it both ways and the“unknown ideal”of pure capitalism would be as grubby, oppressive and alienating as “actually existing” capitalism.

As such, anarchists are firmly convinced that arguments against anarchy based on the lack of ability of the mass of people are inherently self-contradictory (when not blatantly self-servicing). If people are too stupid for anarchism then they are too stupid for any system you care to mention.

Ultimately, anarchists argue that such a perspective simply reflects the servile mentality produced by a hierarchical society rather than a genuine analysis of humanity and our history as a species. To quote Rousseau:“when I see multitudes of entirely naked savages scorn European voluptuousness and endure hunger, fire, the sword, and death to preserve only their independence, I feel that it does not behove slaves to reason about freedom.”[quoted by Noam Chomsky,Marxism, Anarchism, and Alternative Futures, p. 780]

#lefty theory #anarchy #anarchism #leftist theory #resource #leftism #anarchist #anarchist theory #freedom

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pbandjesse · 10 months

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I have a really bad migraine right now but thankfully I am home. So I can just be a lump in bed and rest in the AC. I am really happy to be home right now.

And it wasn't a bad day. It was just really warm. I was just covered in a light layer of sweat all day. I drank a lot of water but I still really felt dehydrated. Which is probably why I have the migraine now. It started in the afternoon. But for most of the day I was fine.

I had trouble falling asleep last night. I don't think I fell asleep until 1:30. And it wasn't a bad sleep. I woke up at 6:00 and was a little unhappy about that but I felt okay. And then I blinked and it was 8:00. I have no idea how quickly I fell asleep.

It took me a while to get up and get myself together. But that was fine. I knew I wanted to wear my Hawaiian pants today. For Hawaiian shirt Wednesday. And I had my biscuit but I had a bad taste in my mouth and it didn't really like the jelly that I had. It was like mixed fruit and I did not enjoy that. But it was fine.

Tatiana came again today and it turns out she did not have the loom. So I have no idea where the 12th one went. She looked at me like what and tried to look around same way I did and neither of us can find it So I'm just assuming a child took it. And it's gone. Which sucks but I ended up just continuing using the cardboard looms today and the kids really liked it and so honestly in the end it worked out.

We had two groups this morning and they did a good job. We had top bar and then pioneers. We finished girl week and we start boy week. And the boys were good. Everyone seemed to try pretty hard for the most part. And I enjoyed everyone's company. It was a good day.

And lunch was an actual meal. I did not get the vegetarian option because it was just the same sad sandwich from yesterday. So I had a very good salad because they finally had hard boiled eggs. And I had that and pasta salad and tater tots and we finally finished the special week ketchup. So I texted James because I knew they were going to get groceries. And they would get us a new bottle.

My afternoon groups were again very early for some reason. And I decided to make a sign for the door because they were 15 minutes early and just came through the building to the back and they were like we're here and I was like no no go do something else. But then it turned out that they weren't even the right day camp group and weren't even supposed to be there! My actual day camp group came on time. Cuz then all of a sudden both of them were there and I was like what is happening. And they're counselor came and took them away because it was their CIT that had misread the schedule I guess. But the day campers did really good and it was fun and then we had a little break to reset and Ty came over so I could help him finish his loom knit hat.

Which actually looked really good! It's a little small for how big his hair is but I was really proud of him. We're going to work on sewing next week so we'll see how that goes. And we both have tried to talk about how we're going to try to stay positive and that our materials are coming and things are good. We're going to try our best to be positive. Things will get better.

I had stockade next and they were very good. The curse too much but they're very funny. And they were very sweet. I got to do a lot of sewing and talking to them about stuff and teaching them bracelets. And I enjoyed chatting with Quan and I showed him the camp TikTok I made last night. Which took me a while because I had to make sure I cropped as many kids out as possible but there's one clip where the kids are in the background so I'm hoping those are okay. I'm going to try my best to make sure my angles are better next time. But Quan gave me a cookie and my headache was right behind my eyeballs but I was still having a nice time.

My last day camp group was fun and I had double-checked that horses was not coming this week so I could go home right after my last group. I got their blooms all finished up and showed them how to tie things off and they helped clean up and then they headed out.

I went to the office to let them know I was leaving and to sign out in our little book and I also wanted to just let them know how great Tatiana is doing and how helpful she is and Heather told me that Tatiana was considering taking some AP classes this summer but instead she decided she's going to stay with me and I just think that is so sweet. So even if she is taking away from my sitting in the dark time I really do appreciate her and her tapestry that she worked on today is so good! She put four of the nail looms together to make it and she really is taking to it and I love that so much. I love when people find art that they really enjoy. She's talking about making blankets and stuff too. So proud of her.

After I talk to Heather and Alexi about the art building flooding for a little while longer I let them know I was going to go home. And that my head hurt and I just needed to be in my house for a while and they understood and I said goodbye.

I did get stuck behind that can't bus for a couple minutes but I got out of there and got on the highway. There wasn't really any traffic. I let James know I was coming home and they were going to order pizza for us and they did but then they canceled because the place had no delivery driver so James had to reorder and then walked to the place. I wish I would have caught that text because I just would have went gotten them.

But once I got home I took a shower and that helped me feel a lot better. I still had the headache but it wasn't quite as uncomfortable.

I open the mail and I had a little gift that I had gotten for James come and romper that I ordered. And soon James was home with pizza and I ate that in bed and now James is recording their podcast and being sweetp are laying in the air conditioning.

Sweetp is looking at me with so much love in his eyes and it's so cute. He misses me so much I think! And I hate that he seems so sad about it but he loves me so much when I come home and that is so nice. Even if he is stinky I still am glad that he is next to me.

I'm riding my post early because my head hurts so much and I don't want it to get worse So I'm going to try to get off my phone for a while. I hope you guys all have a great night and I hope tomorrow is fun and not a sweaty. Good night everybody. Have fun out there.

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starr-fall-knight-rise · 4 years

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Humans are Space Orcs, “Undercover.”

Wrote something for you all this morning. It’s a little more fun and fluffy than anything else, but it also forward the arc, so I hope you like it. Have a great day everyone

Also we have a discord server now, and he link below should be permanent. Hope to see you there :)

https://discord.gg/cTY5SHx

“So you two are planning to…. What exactly? Pose as one of us to get information from these people.”

“That is kind of the general idea I guess.”

Sitting at the bar surrounded by all the noise and lights their conversation went unheard the rest of the bar goers around them.

The bartender and his small Finnari companion wandered off at intermittent times to serve drinks to other customers before wandering back.

The human leaned against the bar, “Look, if that is your plan, then you are going to need some help blending in.”

The commander raised an eyebrow, “Blending in, how so. She's a Drev I’m a human slap on some makeup and a little hair dye and no one will be the wiser.”

The bartender just smiled and shook his head as if amused at the Commander’s ignorance, “no no no, that’s not how it works. You see there is an entire culture behind extrials, a lot of stuff we had to do before it became legal and a lot of stuff we still do now as a sort of memento of the hard times.”

The commander blinked, “Oh, really. I had no idea.”

“That’s alright. It’s not like we advertise it out to everyone, that’s the whole point of it being a secret. Look me and Vin’an get off in like fifteen minutes, and we can help you two out. Besides, the people who have been approaching everyone would never consider doing it here anyway. Most of these people aren’t rich enough, and the establishment is actually a legal one which means it is prone to inspections.”

“Right, sounds fun.”

The commander turned in his seat and leaned back resting his elbows up on the bar. Sunny watched him from where she sat a seat over still nursing her drink, “You seem relaxed for someone who is preparing to spend the next couple of days in espionage.”

He grinned, “Ah but it is also the kind of espionage where I can go partying with my best friend, so I would consider it a little less working and a little more paid vacation.”

She rolled her eyes, “You’re an idiot, you know that.”

“You love it.”

“Mmmmhmmm sure.”

Sunny finished her Drink and the commander closed his eyes seeming to soak up the atmosphere like some sort of strange sponge. Sunny would never understand that about him, of course she liked going out and doing things, but she couldn’t imagine being able to recharge around people. After a while she needed a break, but it looked like he was getting ready to fall contentedly asleep.

A knock on the bar behind them, and she turned to see the bar tender had been replaced by a different couple/

“You two ready to go.”

“Sure thing boss.” the commander turned to sunny, “Come on lets go be cultured and things.”

She just shook her head again but followed along with the group of them as they were motioned through the backdoor behind the bar and up a flight of stairs.

“You guys live here?” The commander wondered.

“A lot of us live in the same building. It makes it easier on all of us. less questions asked and a lot safer, we can pool our money for security equipment and what not. Strength in numbers as it were.”

“Right, makes sense.”

He shouldered open a door to the next apartment stepping into a room lined in UV lights over large potted plants. Everything else had a very modern futuristic looks with neon floor lights and minimalistic furniture, “Damn, bartending pays well.” The commander muttered under his breath, “And I’m still sleeping in a twin.”

“Make yourselves comfortable, go ahead and sit anywhere.”

Before Sunny would do anything the Commander had claimed a strange circular shaped chair that was hanging from the ceiling. It rocked back and forth, and he seemed to be enjoying himself, which was rather amusing to her. It was like trying to wrangle a puppy..

A moment later the bartender came to sit down with them, and the Commander was polite enough to stop his playing around and pay attention, which was a feat all in itself.

“Alright, so a little background for you guys, just general information that anyone in the community would know.” He cracked his knuckles, “The LFIL began as a result of one of the oxyclinics.”

“Oh hey! I worked at one of those after the war for a short time,”

The punk nodded, “Than you know, in those places you tend to get kind of intimate and close up with other aliens. Generally it was very rare and the humans kept everything professional. Generally it started with them having feelings for some people they met but never saying anything or mentioning it because at the time they thought it was wrong. Plus also it was seriously and very professionally wrong to go and do anything about it. However, there was one couple, a Drev and a human who became really good friends during the course of the treatment, and eventually wen the Drev left they kept in contact. Turns out that the human’s second job was as a cage fighter down on one of the local stations for money. They ended up running into each other there where the Drev saw them fight. That led to more time spent hanging out and you get the gist. Independently stories like that were happening all over. Finnari worked well with humans who wanted someone to protect, drev like fighters, and Tesraki were drawn by people’s good business sense and stayed for how loyal humans are. Eventually it spread from the oxy clinics.”

“Wow, I had no idea it began that way, though I guess it makes sense.”

The bartender smiled, “Yeah. I met Vin’an when looking for a place to stay. I had just moved here, and she was looking to hire a human to keep her safe in the big cit. Things progressed from there, so my story is a little less complicated than most, but I guess the one thing you need to know that relates to all extrials is that we are all, in some way very, very eccentric. If you are going to date an alien tan odds are you are going to stand out in other ways as well. At first, it was sort of just a coincidence of personality, but when we started to learn that there were others like us, we started doing it on purpose to let people subtly know who and what we were.”

“But plenty of humans are eccentric.” Sunny pointed out

He turned to look at her, “Not so much off earth. They tend to be military or business types, so not a lot of eccentricities going on. Plus, for a while, we used tattoos to signal what we were, generally we would get the image of the alien that we were attracted to on the arm or other part of the body. It was all in an effort to let each other know what we were and what we were willing to do.”

“And how did aliens react to that?”

“You know, I think there is this misconception that aliens are less prone to odd behaviors than humans and that it is humans that always initiate, but that isn’t true. I know plenty of couples where the non-human was the first one to approach. Of course, it is definitely more of a personality based thing than any other type of relationship. You will find that there are very few extrials who are attracted to aliens outright in the way that normal people are. I mean yeah there are a few, obviously, but most of us had no idea until we met the perfect person. In fact, I've dated plenty of humans in my time, and it didn’t bother me. But that is how a lot of the progressions go, you start out as really good friends, and then it goes from there as you get to know each other.” he clapped his hands, “Anyway, first thing is first, we need to make you look like one of us, that means eccentric.”

From where she was sitting cross-legged on the floor, sunny looked up, “He wears an eyepatch and a military grade cybernetic leg. I think he’s already eccentric enough to fit in.”

The other human laughed while the commander flipped her the bird.

“I mean that is kind of true, but we want you eccentric in a way where no one is going to recognize you. Sunny, I am going to have you go out with Vin’an and pick out some nail polish for your new color. She can help you get ready.”

***

Something the commander and Sunny thought was going to take an hour or two turned into an entire day. Sunny ended up stuck sitting on the roof with the little Finnari being painted a nailpolish color that was called ‘opal unicorn’ which was sort of silver white with sparkles in it. It was a very pretty color, kind of reminding her of her brother’s late partner, but that didn’t mean she enjoyed all the work it took to put the stuff on. It took almost three applications over her full body and A UV light source to harden the stuff.

Still though, she assumed it was much more intense than Adam, and when they returned to the apartment she was surprised to find that he wasn’t there. The two of them sat around for a while playing games and talking about random things until the door clicked open and two humans walked in.

At first Sunny thought The bartender had brought home another one of his other friends before her eyes zeroed in on the human’s face. The eye color was different now a bright blue, but she would know that sheepish expression anywhere.

“Ho-ly shit.” She said looking him up and down, “IS that really you in there.”

He flipped her the bird, “yeah, it’s me.”

The bartender was grinning from one side of his face to the other.

“You know I am pretty sure he went out and did this just to amuse himself.”

“I mean you do look pretty funny.”

“I am very much not a fan of getting a nailgun through my soft cartilage, lets get that straight.”

Sunny tilted her head “Oh so those aren’t clip ons.”

“No, no they are not clip ons.”

“Huh.��

“Told you, no one will recognize you.” The bartender said, grinning

“Yeah no one will recognize me, I don’t even recognize myself. It seems to e a trend in my life lately, dying and cutting my hair.”

Sunny tilted her head the other way. His new look was primarily characterized by lightning blue hair shaved almost to the scalp on the sides and long on the top with some sort of magic holding it straight up in the air. Both of his ears were pierced including one that had piercings along both the top and bottom of the ear with a chain connecting the two.

The more she looked the more she wanted to laugh.

Somehow, he even had a stud in his upper chest around the base of the throat near the collarbones

“You laugh, I Kill You.”

“Don’t worry, I'll just incapacitate you with a large magnet.”

“Mother fucker.”

She danced away laughing as he charged at her skipping out of the way as his heavy boots thudded over the ground.

“Hey, quiet down you’ll wake up my neighbors.” The man hissed as the two of them skidded to a stop.

“You look like a baby punk walked into a staple factory.” Sunny mocked

“And you look like unicorn ji-”

“Keep it civil.”

He shut his mouth tight, “Alright, are we ready, finally?”

“Well, not exactly.”

He crossed his arms, “What do you mean not exactly.”

He smiled “well you aren’t going to convince anyone… unless.”

“Unless what?”

“Unless you actually look like a couple

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh, now go on hold her hand. She’s got enough of them to spare.”

Sunny looked at Adam, Adam looked at Sunny.

“Well go on its not like you’re suddenly going to become extrial if you hold hands.”

“That's not the-” Adam began

“Less talking more hand holding.”

Sunny shrugged and held out her upper left hand. Adam stared at it cleared his throat, reached out and paused.

“Come on, we haven’t got all night. Promise you aren’t suddenly going to be attracted to aliens.”

“I never said-”

“Go on.”

He looked over at sunny again. She tilted her head at him, “Wow, making me feel really great here Adam, promise I don’t have germs.”

He ignored them, reached out and took her hand.

He was…. Very awkward. The palm of his hand was very sweaty, and he didn’ts seem to understand that the point of hand holding was to make contact with the person and not avoid touching them as much as possible.

The punk sighed and walked over, “have you ever held hands with anyone…. Ever?”

“No.”

“Oh hmm.”

He walked over grabbed them and readjusted, “Hold down here, and now get a bit closer, closer. Seriously dude what is your issue. You sort of just interlace the fingers like that.” He practically had to bodily move Adam right up next to sunny.

He was stiff as a board.”

“You aren’t very good at this.”

Adam had his mouth clamped shut.

“Honestly you can actually look like you like her. I know you guys are friends and friends hold hands all the time.”

Adam tugged at the collar of his jacket, “Is it hot in here?”

“Stop trying to change the subject.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just really really bad with anything in this related field.”

“You’ve never had a girlfriend?’

“No.”

“Boyfriend.”

“No/ “One night stand.”

“No.”

His eyes were wide, “Wow, so you’re still.”

“Can we change the subject please.”

Off to his side he could feel sunny shaking. He looked over at her only to find that she was laughing silently behind his back.

“What’s so funny.”

“You, you’re funny. I have never met someone so adorably inept at interpersonal relationships.”

“This is a fake interpersonal relationship.”

“Just imagine how you would manage the real thing.” She continued to laugh and he frowned at her.

“Alright now why don’t we go out, get used to this outside head around and get to know the places. It’ll be a fun night.”

She pulled Adam closer, “Oh yes it will.”

He groaned.

***

The guy hadn’t been wrong. They went all over the city catching looks everywhere they went through their presence was greeted with great enthusiasm in almost every location. The commander kept his eye out for any suspicious activity though he didn't expect it to happen right away if at all. Him and sunny wouldn’t be likely to be approached seeing as they weren’t an established member of the community, but perhaps they could integrate well enough that they would notice when someone was approached.

Halfway through the n night the commander walked off to get drinks.

Sunny sat looking around the room and occasionally talking with some of the other patrons. Adam returned a moment later sitting next to her and handing her a drink before sliding his hand back into place in hers.

She could see him from the corner of her eyes as he discreetly checked out the room.

The aperture of his fake eye was adjusting opening and closing as he used it to catalog and track every person within radius.

HE craned his head to the side leaning against her as he tried to get a look at some people on the other side of the room.

She put an arm around him turning her head to see behind them.

Light flashed and strobed as music played in the background.

At some point they were invited to dancing and then bar hopping with another group which they took in order to properly integrate themselves inward.

The night went by and sunny lost all track of location and time.

She thought she fell asleep at some point and woke up to find Adam dozing off at her shoulder.

She remembered even later in that crashing at someone else’s apparent on the floor of the living room which was strewn with almost a dozen other people.

Adam and Sunny ended up squished against the couch pressed up against each other to make room for everyone else.

She was so tired that it didn’t matter the noise.

And then they were up again on the town and back to the bars.

Adam was only growing more comfortable while she was beginning to lag. This lifestyle was not for her. She hadn’t been alone in hours. The constant noise and people were draining her life away.

At one point in the night they were sitting back on one of the couches talking. Adam stretched and put his arm over her shoulder turning his head and leaning in close. His breath was hot against her face, “Three o clock. I think I got something.”

She turned her head forehead brushing against his. Giving him cover, “What do you see.”

He pretended to laugh and leaned closer, “I've seen these people three times. They never touch each other barely look at each other, and the have just invited one of these couples into a back room.”

“They could just be…. Offering favors.”

Adam rested his head on her shoulder, “I don’t think so. They aren’t acting right, they don’t look right, point is there is something about them that does not belong here. You know plus they are both tesraki, which is kind of a dead give away.”

She wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer, “OK yeah that is a bit suspicious.”

“I'm going to try and get access to the GA database, hopefully our IT guy can give us a bit of help.”

Shr an a hand through his hair, “Want me to keep an eye on them.”

“Go ahead.”

Another couple sat down across from them nearly blocking Sunny's view.

“I just have to say.” Their new neighbors commented learning closer, ‘You two are such a cute couple.” Sunny did her best to be polite while being forced to crane her neck past their heads.

“Why thank you. How about you two though, where did you guys meet.” That should shut them up for a while

And she was right.

Adam squeezed her hand once, and then twice.

She knew what that meant.

The two of them stood suddenly and Adam smiled, “Sorry guys, but I just got a call in from work. It was nice meeting you though, take care and have a good night.”

They were waved off with a smile.

Adam gripped her hand as together they walked through the club and towards the door where the Tesraki had disappeared.

Hopefully he knew what he was doing.

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dadalux · 4 years

Photo

Rene Magritte Painting The Pleasure Principle (Portrait of Edward James), 1937. Painted in 1937, René Magritte’s ‘Le Principe du plaisir (The Pleasure Principle)’ is an entrancing portrait that depicts Edward James, one of the most influential patrons of Surrealist art, who was introduced to Magritte by Salvador Dalí in 1937. Commissioned directly by James, the present portrait was rendered from a photograph of the patron that was taken according to the artist’s specifications by fellow Surrealist, Man Ray. Magritte envisioned the concept for the present work before ever meeting James – in 1936, the artist included an ink sketch resembling the oil on the first page of a hand-made book honoring the Surrealist poet, Paul Éluard. A highlight of Sotheby's Impressionist & Modern Art Evening Sale on 12 November, this mesmerizing work is now on view in Sotheby's New York galleries. Le Principe du plaisir (The Pleasure Principle), painted in 1937, showcases several enduring and recognizable themes from Magritte’s oeuvre: visual and cerebral paradox, an uncanny alteration of the familiar and the tension between the visible and the hidden. The painting is a portrait of Edward James, an English heir to an American railroad fortune turned eccentric poet and influential patron of Surrealist art. After Dalí introduced James to Magritte in 1937, James immediately invited the artist to spend the winter months at his Wimpole Street house in London, and for two years James commissioned a number of paintings from the burgeoning Surrealist. Of these commissions, two are portraits of the patron: La Reproduction interdite (Not To Be Reproduced) and the present work. Magritte envisioned the concept for Le Principe du plaisir before ever meeting James. In 1936 Magritte included an ink sketch resembling the present work on the first page of a hand-made book honoring the surrealist poet, Paul Éluard. Beneath the drawing, Magritte writes “pour Paul Éluard (Idée de Paul Colinet)." This inscription may refer to Marcel Mariën’s claim that Paul Colinet submitted the idea for portrait manqué (failed portrait), or a portrait with an invisible or hidden face, to Magritte, albeit after the artist had been obscuring the likeness of his subjects for nearly a decade. Then, in June 1937, several months after his stay at James’ Wimpole Street home, Magritte presented the idea of this portrait in a letter to James: “I have done a picture representing a man whose head is a light…I consider it as a preliminary study, the real picture as I envision is still to be painted but since it would be intended for you, do you not think your person could be recognized in it as well? If the idea appeals to you, all you have to do is be photographed full-faced at a table with your arms crossed and resting on the table and a sort of stone lying on the table to your right and not too far from your arm. And send me the photograph” (quoted in D. Sylvester, ed., René Magritte Catalogue Raisonné, op. cit., pp. 249-50). James commissioned fellow surrealist Man Ray to take his photograph, which he quickly mailed to Magritte for the portrait. When Magritte finished the painting in September and had it delivered to James in London, James told Magritte in a letter, “My friend and I think it is a great success, in fact a work of genius” (quoted in ibid., p. 250). The title of the painting refers to a key element of Freudian psychoanalysis, which served as a philosophical underpinning for the Surrealist movement. However, Magritte himself has warned against interpretations and analysis of his titles: “The titles of pictures are not explanations and pictures are not illustrations of titles. The relationship between title and picture is poetic, that is, it only catches some of the object’s characteristics of which we are usually unconscious, but which we sometimes intuit, when extraordinary events take place which logic has not yet managed to elucidate” (quoted in J. Levy, ed., René Magritte: Selected Writings, Minneapolis, 2016, p. 112). Edward James, a poet and a lifelong collector of art, is particularly remembered for his patronage of Surrealist painters including Dalí, Margritte, Tchelitchew, Fini and Carrington. He provided space for his artist friends to develop their creative practice. Dalí, Tchelitchew, Magritte and others were given studio space during extended stays in Edward's homes at West Dean and in London. He supported them further through commissions and collaborations, building one of the finest collections of Surrealist art in the world. Le Principe du plaisir remained in James' collection until 1964 when it became a part of his eponymous Foundation. It was acquired by the present owner in 1979 and has remained in the same private collection for nearly forty years. Impressionist and Modern Art Evening Sale, Sotheby's, NY, 12 November 2018 Lot 35 René Magritte 1898 - 1967 LE PRINCIPE DU PLAISIR Estimate 15,000,000 — 20,000,000 USD Signed magritte (upper left); titled "Le Principe du plaisir," signed Magritte and dated 1937 (on the reverse) Oil on canvas 28 3/4 by 21 1/2 in. 73 by 54.5 cm Painted in 1937. Source: www.artdependence.com

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cycat4077 · 4 years

Text

Paradise Found (pt. b)

Summary: A continuation from Paradise Lost (pt. a). Sonny has become extremely distant after Mike’s death and it seems that life has just thrown you one bad thing after another. Will Sonny finally open up? (Set after S17x23, Heartfelt Passages.) Pairing: Sonny x Reader Warnings: Angst and some fluff. Basically a lot of feelings. Words: 2100 AO3 here

Part 7b of the Changes verse. Masterlist here you’re interested :)

A/N: This has sat in my drafts for far too long. I’ve had to shelve my fic writing for academic writing and even posting this feels like I’m cheating on my school work. I’ve got so many more ideas in the waiting so I hope that I can squeeze a few more in here and there and hopefully people will still want to read my crap ^.^

They say bad things happen in threes. The death of Sgt. Mike Dodds was the first thing to set the world off kilter while the way Sonny reacted was the second. That leaves you fearful of how life could get worse with a possible bad thing number three…

It’s been about two weeks since Mike died and two weeks since you woke up alone. To say Sonny has been distant is an understatement. Initially, you tried phoning (to no avail) and eventually resorted to texts instead:

Good morning, Sonny. Have a good day. Love you. Sent 7:04am

Classes are done for the day and I just got home. Sent 5:32pm

Sitting down to supper. Tried making chicken parm. It's definitely not as good as yours, but not terrible! Love you. Sent 7:16pm

Miss you, Sonny. If you want to talk, know that I’m here. Sent 8:03pm

Night, Sonny. Love you. Sent 11:28pm

Worked late. Goodnight. Received 11:52pm

You persisted in this way for a few days trying to convey that you would stick by him through anything, but it was clear Sonny wanted his space and eventually you conceded into giving it to him.

One evening, when sitting down to the seven o'clock news, you find coverage of Dodd’s funeral. What seemed like a hundred officers stood in uniform paying homage to their fallen brother. The casket was carried down the church steps by Mike's closest comrades; Sonny being one of them. It was sort of surreal seeing him on tv as he was absolutely stoic, though you knew him well enough to recognize the grief that lay just beneath the surface.

It tore your heart apart seeing him that way. You felt powerless because you wanted nothing more than to take away his pain, yet he wouldn't let you in. The days were hard and every night you shed new tears.

Finally, after two weeks you receive a phone call.

"Hey," Sonny's voice comes through. It isn't saturated with sadness like it had been on the night he showed up at your apartment. Instead, it’s apologetic.

"Hey," you reply cautiously. As much as you were thankful to hear from him again, his actions had still left a hole in your heart.

"I'm sorry..." You hear him exhale. "I'm so sorry I pushed you away. I know you were just tryin' to be there for me through all this 'n I've been a complete dick."

You feel tears prick your eyes. "Sonny-" you manage but it's only a whisper.

"No, doll. You don't have ta say anythin'," he interrupts gently. "Would it be alright if I come over? Cook us dinner? Do a little grovellin'? Talk this out ‘n try ta get back in your good graces?"

As hard as the last little while has been on you emotionally, you simply can't refuse.

Sonny shows up to your apartment a short time later, ingredients in tow. He sets them down right away and takes your shoulders gently in his outstretched hands. You can still see traces of grief in his eyes but it doesn't drown out the light like it had before.

He apologizes again and again until you're accepting a hug. Two warm arms engulf you and the emotions hit you all at once: just how much you've missed this – how much you’ve missed him.

“Can ya forgive me, doll?” he speaks into your hair.

You withdraw from his embrace to look into his eyes. “Of course, Sonny,” you reassure him, “but I don’t think I can handle going through this again. I need to know that you trust me enough to talk about what you’re feeling.”

It’s an unintentional shot to his heart. Sonny’s brow furrows and his blue eyes soften. He glances at his feet for a moment and takes a shaky breath before meeting your gaze once again. “I’ve never been through this type of thing before,” he begins. “Partly ‘cause I’ve never stuck around a precinct long enough ta get attached to my coworkers. But with these guys – with Mike - it almost felt like he was my brother. And then his life was gone just like that.” Sonny snaps his fingers, the sharp sound piercing the air around you. “I prayed for him. For his fiancée. For his father. I was supposed ta take that call, y’know?” Sonny’s shoulders sink as guilt weighs heavy on his conscience. “I was supposed ta be the one in that house that day. But Mike wanted one last crack at SVU before he left ‘n he payed for it with his life.” Your hands are in his now as he gives them a gentle squeeze. “I didn’t know how ta deal with that ‘n least of all I didn’t wanna to drag you down with me.”

With Sonny’s true feelings exposed, your heart breaks all over again. You lace your fingers with his in an attempt to put him at ease. “Sonny, needing someone to talk to isn’t a weakness,” you state reassuringly. “We’re in this together. That’s why I kept trying to reach you…but it seemed as though you didn’t want me around. I didn’t want to pry, but…but this was really hard on me,” you sniffle, trying to keep the tears at bay. You in no way want to take away from what Sonny felt, but you still need him to know how his actions affect you. “I had no way of knowing whether you were okay or not. You left me in the middle of the night, barely answered my messages. We went from “all” to “nothing” in a matter of a day. What was I supposed to think? I tried to tell myself that when you were ready, you’d let me back in.” The tears now start to roll down your cheeks as you lay your feelings out in the open. “But – but I couldn’t help thinking about the worst-case scenario: that somehow all this would create something between us that would be too hard to fix.”

“God no!” exclaims Sonny as he disentangles one of his hands from yours to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. He levels his gaze on you and you can see the shimmer of tears in his eyes too. “One thing that never wavers is how much I love you. You’re my everything, doll ‘n if Mike’s death has taught me anythin’ it’s that you never know what could happen. I don’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you. I need you more than you could ever know. So, I’m sorry I was so distant. I should never have -”

You silence him with a sad smile. “I’m sorry for everything you had to go through, but I love you with all my heart. So, all I ask is that you let me in. Whenever you’re stressed or something goes wrong at work, whatever it may be, I’m here. Talk to me. Hug me. Kiss me. I may not always have the right words to say, but I will hold your hand through it all. Just please don’t disappear.”

Instantly, Sonny gathers you in his arms once again. “I promise, doll. I promise.” As he gently sways you back and forth, all you can do is hope that he truly means it.

Eventually, the two of you part and the mood lightens as Sonny sets to work preparing dinner. The food is delicious, as his cooking always is, and you both quickly fall back into old routines of smiling, laughing and just being yourselves.

Later, Sonny is chatting to you with his back turned towards the sink while he puts away the last of your dishes. You’re already heading for the couch when a notification pings on your phone. Upon reading the email it suddenly feels as though the earth is dropping out from under your feet. Your whole body sags, pulling you down onto the sofa. Your eyes glue themselves to the screen, reading the lines of text over and over incredulously and as a result, you don't hear the lighthearted joke Sonny makes. And it's when you don’t laugh that Sonny turns in confusion.

Your ghostly state causes him to toss the dish towel and hastily arrive by your side. "What's wrong, doll?" Your hands begin to tremble. Your mouth is completely dry. "Doll?" Sonny repeats, the concern in his voice growing. "Everythin' okay?"

You manage to turn your head towards him and open your mouth to speak. "I...I...I'm being fired."

"What?!" Sonny blurts, jumping to his feet.

You follow him with your eyes as he paces, raising his hands in disbelief. "It...it says here that the professor who used to teach my course is coming out of retirement and they won't be...needing me anymore."

"Can they do that?" he exclaims, growing angry.

"Apparently so," you say, absolutely defeated. There it is. Bad thing number three.

Sonny lets out a huff, his hands emphasizing his frustration. "But it's the end of the semesta!"

"I don't know what I'm going to do," you admit. "Once this course is over, that's it. Where am I going to work? How am I going to pay my bills?" The tears begin to fall which instantaneously flips a mood switch inside your boyfriend.

"Hey, hey," his voice is soft and gentle. "Don't cry, okay? You'll be alright." Sonny sits back down next to you and wipes away a tear with his thumb. Then he suddenly lights up. "Move in with me."

"What?" you sniffle.

"Move in with me!" he repeats like it's the most natural thing in the world. "It's not outta the ordinary for two people who love each other to move in together. And I love you. Besides," his words tumble out at a mile a minute, "you won't have ta worry 'bout rent and it'll give ya time ta find a new job. Yourra great teacha so you will finda new job."

Your heart melts over his kindness. "Sonny, I couldn't," you shake your head dismissively. "I don't want to mooch off you -"

"Nah," he puts up a hand to shush you. "I want ya with me. Honestly."

You try to smile but there's another dreadful reality that emerges from the depths of your mind. "But Sonny...what if I can't get a job? What if there's no positions available in the city? I...I may be forced to move away."

You watch as Sonny's whole body droops. You can tell immediately that he never considered that possibility. He studies you for a moment with saddened eyes before taking your hands in his. They're soft and warm; a sense of comfort among this entire mess. "We'll cross that bridge if we come to it, doll. What we've got is bigger than any distance we may have ta face." He kisses your forehead, lips lingering so you know he means every word. All the heartache from the last two weeks just melts away. None of it matters now. It's just you and him against the world once more.

You squeeze his hands and look Sonny in the eyes. "Stay with me tonight? Please?" It's a desperate plea, vulnerable and exposed. Maybe it's because of his two-week absence. Maybe it's the fear of your uncertain future. Or maybe it's a combination of both. But the thing is: you simply can't bear the thought of being alone. Now, it’s you who needs him.

"Absolutely," agrees Sonny without a second of hesitation. He pulls you to his chest for a much-needed, comforting hug.

In the weeks that follow, Sonny helps you pack your belongings up and transfer them into his place. Your parents drive in from upstate to help you move as well, allowing Sonny to wiggle even farther into their hearts.

All the while you finalize the semester's grading and say a reluctant goodbye to the course you've come to love teaching.

Doing your research, you send your dossier to other colleges in Manhattan and the surrounding boroughs. Thankfully, your luck shifts and a phone call comes through with an offer for the fall. It would be a similar contract as before with courses you would enjoy teaching. The cherry on top is that your new campus would be even closer to Sonny's apartment than your previous job.

It would have to be a summer of tight budgeting to make up for your unemployment, but it would also be a summer where every night you get to fall asleep in the arms of the man you love. And really, there is no other future that could be as bright.

-x-

Thanks for reading!

Part 8 here :)

#Sonny Carisi x Reader #Sonny Carisi #Sonny x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #Sonny Carisi x you #Changes #The Changes verse #my fanfic

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zyyrhnews · 3 years

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NOT Issue #1: Glad That’s Over

Because of a non-disclosure agreement, I’m not allowed to say why I left Kzozwym. I’m even less allowed to say how. These are basically the only restrictions I have now, and god bless. Well, no, not literally, maybe saying that is bad taste considering Kzozwym. Or maybe it’s in good taste considering the Obsidian Temple? I was never a devout follower of Zyyrh, but this place has been so accommodating for my situation. It’s been over a week since I got here and I find myself a fugitive in a land with no newsletters. I will do what I will do best: writing newsletters, this time almost free from limitations. Almost. Nobody’s perfect.

Acolyte of the Week

For the first Acolyte of the Week, I’m nominating Yozav the -- just kidding, fuck that guy. The actual first Acolyte of the Week is Glynda, who works in the kitchen, has four arms, and warmly welcomed me to the Temple when I first arrived here. One of the most genuinely sweet people I’ve met, and she knows how to make a mean lizard soup. Reptile malice is absolutely delicious, it turns out. Which is a good thing because this intersection between dimensions only has reptiles that hate us. No mammals. There’s almost birds, but those have scales too and the locals call them wyverns. The Swamp of Tomorrow has fish, but the acolytes insist that those are lizards and I couldn’t prove them wrong. Oh, and again: all of them hate us. Best soup I’ve ever had. Thanks Glynda.

Helpful Tips

If you want to extract the seething rage of a snake, do so the same way for if you want to obtain its toxins: tell it you killed its family. This is an obvious lie, but the snake doesn’t know that and it’s surprisingly gullible. This will get you a lot of poison and snake hatred. Seek medical attention immediately, and then maybe make delicious snake hatred soup out of it.

Healthy Recipes

Here’s the ingredients you’ll need for this week’s recipe:

Seven Human Souls

You’ll need ‘em!

Special Events

On Tuesday, don’t miss band practice! You can bring along your own instruments of course, but some highlights will be Jacob trying out the drums, Franklin playing a tuba filled to the brim with soup, and Zaladar the Insatiable playing a literal sick air guitar. We keep telling him to get it checked out after the last time he went out to get cobra loathing, but he just doesn’t listen. Thankfully this is a place where nobody can die, not even string instruments made of raw elemental energy. Probably still sucks to get bitten by a cobra though.

Community Questions

This is admittedly awkward, cause I don’t have anything prepared for this segment! Back when I was still in Kzozwyn I would type out a random word that sounded kind of divine and say that Yozav - His Glory Shall Lead Us To Perfect Transience Under The Heel Of My Shoe - told me to say it. I hated that segment, even though it was easy. I want to change it. Only problem is that I forgot to get questions from the community in advance. Oops. Maybe next time I’ll have something? By a streak of luck I might even get a whisper from another dimension! ...Maybe. Not gonna count my chickens before they hatch, especially when cross-dimensional communication is only maybe involved. If I did happen to get a query from an unknown universe, I’d probably keep it anonymous.

Before We Leave

Once again I want to thank everyone at the Obsidian Temple. I’m still not sure if this dimension breaking temple in a hell forest where nobody can die is suitable for me, but the people are surprisingly nice for the situation they’ve chosen to be put in. Maybe I’ll make a home out of this yet. I still miss my original dimension, but this is better than Kzozwym. Oh, speaking of, Kzozwym is still getting these because I made a pact at some point that means that any newsletters I make get distributed there automatically. I don’t even think Yozav wants them there anymore. Especially not when they include my true feelings about him. But also, hey, if you’re reading this and you’re still stuck in that City of Light: there’s hope. Still not going to say how I got out because it might compromise the method, but know that Amelia Cassar got out, and she doesn’t have to stay anonymous or be formal as shit all the time anymore. Stay safe out there. Zyyrh has your back.

#fiction #eldritch #comedy #writing #newsletter

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