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donnerpartyofone · 10 months

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This has been a really hard one to talk about. I'm always very ambivalent about mourning celebrities. I try to remember that I don't know these people, that what is really mourned by most of us is the person's ongoing work, which in the best cases has helped us understand ourselves and the world in which we live. Unavoidably, though, you can start to develop the sense that you know these people personally, which isn't true or even appropriate necessarily, I mean you have no idea whether you would even like someone you've only seen on a screen or received an autograph from; but at the same time, I don't know if you can really force yourself not to feel like the deceased celebrity is a dear friend you will never get to talk to again (the last time I tried and failed was the passing of Lux Interior). Maybe this is more forgivable, and also more inevitable, if you feel like you grew up with the person.

Of course this is all about ME now, but my mother (who also died from cancer) was an extremely hip, brilliant, funny individual who for whatever reason refused to form a relationship with me. This was pretty strange, because we liked a lot of the same things--B movies, old comics, all types of camp and kitsch--but when I liked those things, it was in poor taste and punishable by exile, whereas when she liked those things, it was evidence of her cultural genius. Before I make anybody too mad I should say that I'm being a little bit unfairly reductive just so I can get to the point, which is that one of the few things we could share was Pee-Wee's Playhouse. I didn't know anything about the show's more adult origins or the fact that Paul Reubens was sort of a performance artist, but I didn't have to. Pee-Wee's Playhouse was a feast for any child's senses: stylish, hilarious, and on some subliminal level, really sophisticated. I was clued into some of what was going on just because I watched it with my mom, who always laughed at Pee-Wee's winks and nudges to the hep parents in the audience. The show might have been my first encounter with the kind of anthropological humor favored by people like David Byrne and Laurie Anderson, artists who engage subversively with cliches, stereotypes, and other memetic parts of popular culture. In Pee-Wee's Playhouse, with its sharp, edgy cast and crew, kids like me were getting into fine art without even knowing it--which is possibly the best way to learn about art anyway.

In fact, on the other side of our house, I became obsessed with Gary Panter's incredible punk opus Jimbo In Paradise, a Dantesque comic book about an innocent young guy living in a dystopian future, where he is occasionally joined by guest stars such as Nancy and Hedorah. I was about 7 when I started reading Jimbo over and over again even though I could barely understand it, and I had no idea that Gary had pretty much designed Pee-Wee's Playhouse. I'm speaking about him so familiarly because I got to know him a little bit as a grownup. I remember Gary talking about how private Paul Reubens could be. He used to do this thing where he would accept a dinner invitation from anybody who asked, as sort of a stunt, but he had to stop doing it because people became so intrusive and entitled with him. Gary said that they'd be walking around in New York and when they saw an obvious Pee-Wee fan gearing up for an offensive, Paul Reubens would sort of transform into this totally different person, putting out an aura that let you know not to fuck with him. It's crazy-making to think that someone who was so protective of the boundary between his private and public selves had to suffer that ridiculous arrest, but it's heartening that most of society eventually grew the fuck up and forgot about it. It's also helpful to remember when he turned up later on the MTV Music Video Awards and started off by asking the audience, "HEARD ANY GOOD JOKES LATELY??"

I'm glad we got one more Pee-Wee special in the past several years, but I always wished that we would see Paul Reubens in more movies. He was such a cool actor, funny, convincing, and naturally charismatic. While people are cycling through their favorite roles of his, I want to point out that he had a great role on a recent HBO miniseries called Mosaic, an intense, engrossing crime drama that I definitely recommend if you have access. Maybe I'll rewatch it, too. In closing, here's a great story that I grabbed from Facebook that should warm everybody's heart, along with the heartbreaking statement (inappropriately cropped by Instagram of course) released upon the death of the very private Pee-Wee Herman. It makes you wish you could thank him in person, for everything. The best we can do is just remember him.

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praetorqueenreyna · 5 months

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For our little ACOTAR gift exchange! This is a gift fic for @taymartiart, who is one of the BEST artists I've ever met! When asked what she wanted me to write, she said "accidental dick pic." This was so much fun, I love silly modern AUs! Enjoy!

Read here on AO3, or continue reading below:

Rhysand was about ready to silence his phone for the evening. It had been pinging non-stop as war raged on in the group chat. It had started with Mor saying she was craving a sparkling water, and Cassian replying to ask why she liked drinking raw sewage. That had been two hours ago, long past the point that Rhysand thought it was funny. He had also found Amren’s threat to murder Cassian by replacing his blood with sparkling water a little alarming.

There were a few minutes of peace where his phone made no noise at all. The reprieve was interrupted by a lone ding. Rhysand sighed, fully expecting the barrage to begin once again. When it didn’t, he risked actually checking his phone. The text was not from the group chat (ironically named “The Inner Circle” after Mor got way too into mafia movies, and Rhysand didn’t know how to change it), but was from Tamlin. It was a welcome distraction. Tamlin was a little weird, but Rhysand liked him. They had both started off as their fathers’ proteges, expected to take on the family business. Rhysand had fulfilled his end of the bargain, and Tamlin had run off to play guitar in coffee shops around town. An absolutely ridiculous career move, but it was endearing, in its own way.

It didn’t hurt that Tamlin was super hot and also into guys. Rhysand wasn’t too proud to admit that. He had tested the waters, putting on his most seductive voice to tease Tamlin, always just on the edge of outright flirtation. Every time, Tamlin turned a splotchy red and adorably ducked his head, which only made Rhysand want to do it again.

There was no text preview for the message; it only had an attached image. Rhysand opened it and blinked. He had worked a long day, and surely he was hallucinating. Staring at his phone didn’t change anything, and he finally accepted that Tamlin had sent him a picture of his dick.

It was nice, both the dick itself and the picture. Good size, good lighting, good angle. The photo captured his well-defined abs and a small tattoo on his hip bone. Rhysand zoomed in on the picture to see that the tattoo was a name. Alex, maybe? Or Alec? He had no idea why Tamlin had sent him this. The last text exchanged between them was from a week ago, when Rhysand had asked if he was playing this weekend. Nothing to indicate that the next step would be dick pics.

More curious than upset, Rhysand quickly typed out a message.

”Nice tattoo. Ex boyfriend?”

Tamlin began replying right away, in a series of rapid fire messages.

”What?”

“Oh.”

“Oh no.”

“Oh no no no no no.”

“I am SO sorry!!!! I didn’t mean to send that to you!!! I’d never do something like that!!!”

The overuse of exclamation points aside, Rhysand felt bad for him.

”It’s all good, I swear. Not the first dick I’ve seen.”

The reply was instantaneous.

”Oh good!! Not that you’ve seen dicks, that you’re not mad. I’m really sorry.

He probably could have ended it there, but Rhysand was intrigued.

”Who was it for?”

Tamlin didn’t respond for a bit, and Rhysand worried he had overstepped. It was an unexpected relief when another message came in.

”Some guy from Grindr. A friend signed me up for it because I haven’t gone on a date in a while. His name also begins with an R.”

The thought of Tamlin and his awkward demeanor cruising on Grindr was honestly hilarious. This friend had to have been fucking with him. Then again, he never would have expected Tamlin to send a dick pic to a random guy on a dating app, and here they were.

”Already at the dick pic stage? Seems like it's getting serious.”

This time, the reply was faster.

”Ha ha. I actually haven’t even met him yet. We were just talking and he asked for a picture. I’ve never done that before and thought what the hell. And then immediately fucked it up.”

Tamlin was way too sweet and sincere for the guys on Grindr. Thinking fast, Rhysand searched for and downloaded a photo of the Washington Monument. Before he could let Tamlin stew in his self pity for too long, he sent:

”We’ve all fucked up. I’ll send you a pic too, so we’re even.”

He attached the downloaded photo, only thinking to question the joke after he had sent it. It was familiar, bordering on flirtatious. The kind of thing he’d usually only send to Azriel or Cassian. His phone pinged.

”No wonder your ego is huge.”

Another text came in, this time a photo of a male mallard with the title “duck pic.” Rhysand actually laughed. He shot back something about the head of the duck being bright green, and maybe he should get that looked at. Tamlin coyly asked if he knew any good doctors. Holy shit, was Tamlin hitting on him? He knew that Rhysand was a doctor; more accurately a surgeon, working in his father’s clinic.

Rhysand found himself draped over the couch, texting with Tamlin for over an hour. The mortifying start to their conversation seemed to loosen something in him. He was funnier and more charming than Rhysand had ever seen. It felt special, to have Tamlin be so open with him. The thought of Tamlin being like this with “random guy from Grindr who’s name begins with R” filled Rhysand with a seething hot emotion that he eventually identified as jealousy.

When the conversation seemed like it was drifting to an end, Rhysand made his move. He selected one of his own pictures from a hidden folder on his phone (yes he had his own dick pics saved for occasions like this) and sent it. He waited a few seconds, then wrote:

”If you want to keep going, give me a call.”

The urge to throw his phone across the room overwhelmed him. He resorted to putting it face down on the coffee table and staring pointedly at the ceiling. The next minute was the longest of his life. But then, like a miracle, his phone began to ring.

*****************************

One month later

“You owe me a thank you drink.”

“What did you do now?” Tamlin asked, only giving half of his attention to the giant man sitting on the floor. His roommate was supposed to be helping him set up, which mostly just involved finding a stool for Tamlin to sit on. Mission accomplished, Andras sat back on his hands, watching as Tamlin fiddled with his guitar. The coffee shop was almost empty, but it would start to fill up as Tamlin’s set started. He was a regular here.

“Don’t try that innocent act on me, I know all your secrets.” Andras pointed an accusing finger. “You found a hookup on Grindr. You’re welcome.”

“What? No I didn’t.”

“Yes you did. I know all the signs. Lucien and I barely see you anymore, you haven’t brooded in weeks, and I found this in your backpack.” For his final exhibit, Andras brandished a small foil packet that revealed itself to be a condom when he stopped shaking it around.

“Stop that!” Blushing, Tamlin snatched the condom out of Andras’s hand. “Why were you going through my backpack anyway?”

“Don’t change the subject. Who is it? That guy with the blue hair? What was his name, Ryan?”

“What are you guys talking about?” Tamlin’s second roommate, Lucien, asked, appearing as if summoned by an omniscient being that wanted to ruin Tamlin’s life.

“Tamlin’s new boy toy,” Andras answered before Tamlin could.

“Ooooooh. Is it that guy with the septum piercing? Rowan?”

Tamlin was about to tell them that he was moving out and they were never allowed to talk to him again when his gaze caught a familiar dark-haired figure swagger into the coffee shop. His heart stuttered, his breath caught in his throat. Rhys sat down at a table near his little stage, leaning back in the seat. He saw Tamlin staring and grinned, waggling his fingers obnoxiously in greeting.

Of course, Rhys had known where he was going. Tamlin had come here straight from Rhys’s apartment, having barely escaped from the lean arms that had grabbed at him, inviting him back into the comforting warmth of Rhys’s bed. Tamlin just hadn’t thought that Rhys would actually show up.

Too late, he remembered that he was in public, being scrutinized by the two people who knew him better than they knew themselves. He watched in horror as Andras and Lucien looked back and forth between Tamlin and Rhysand. Recognition dawned on their faces. At the same time, they said,

“No fucking way.”

#acotar #a court of thorns and roses #tamsand #tamlin #rhysand #tamlin/rhysand #fanfic #my fic #MERR CHRISMAS TAY #HUGS AND KISSES

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kurikive · 1 year

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ditto thoughts!!

guys theres just something abt ditto....... I SERIOUSLY END UP CRYING EVERYTIME I WATCH THE MV LIKE ITS RIDICULOUS HOW HARD I SOB

idk if its the mv or the song or the theories or what ever but i just end up with tears in my eyes LIKE ITS BADDD

the song is so good in a way that it's scary,, HANNI'S woohoowoohoo~ sounds almost haunting and i just cant help but imagine if i was ban heesoo and i was in that forest and heard that voice in the distance id be like yea these r my last moments theyre not gonna find my body lol LIKE OH. MY. GOD.

i fucking love all the theories especially the one where heesoo represents the fans and newjeans being not actually is like a mirror to parasocial relationships??? like the comfort idols bring that it makes you feel closer to them almost in a way it makes u think ur their friend but theyre not actually physically there for you,, REWATCHING THE MV AFTER READING THAT MADE ME SOB SO HARDDD

also i read that the deer or like the meaning of having a deer cross ur way represents that its time to check if youre living in the past, as if you cant move on from your memories AND LIKE......WHAT IF NWJNS ARE DEAD AND AND AND-

it could mean a lot of things tbh,, i was also thinking abt the guy (choi hyunwook's character) and the way him and heesoo walked away in the end together,, like he was the only person we see interact with heesoo apart from newjeans but they're not real or wtv and they walked together after the scene where the deer walked away from heesoo so i think maybe that represents how she's leaving the comfort that the idols give her and is choosing to be comforted by an actual person in her life thats real and not a parasocial relationship,, i could be wrong

ALSO I read from a ktokki's theory on twt that when the girls were drawing the girl on the blackboard it could be heesoo (who represents fans) but since the drawing is a little different from what heesoo looks like it could mean its like them saying "we also imagine what you look like, we also think of you even when we dont know you physically or personally" and i just thought it was a cute theory

im probably ranting sooo much and im not even finished thats whats worse,, i saw from a twt post again from a ktokki that in some of the concept pics, hanni is the odd one out,, like in some pictures shes the only one thats looking directly at the camera and in others shes the only one not looking at it. theres also some other ones where her face is covered completely and/or her back is facing the camera (even when the others are turned around too, some parts of their faces can be seen but hanni's face us just... not there???)

ie.

i have absolutely no idea what this means maybe we'll find out in OMG or the next comeback but its super freaky like some pics were honestly horror movie worthy and some mv scenes too!!!! and i actually really love that!!! like i enjoy so much when a music video looks normal on the surface but theres something so eerie abt it and its creeping me out like when i get the feeling something abt this is wrong and i wanna know what it is

anyways,, as you can see i REALLY enjoyed this comeback and i am super hyped for OMG i seriously cant waittt,, sorry for ranting so much and id love to hear your thoughts on the mv too if you'd like to reblog or leave a comment!! also tell me if youd like to see me do things like these for other songs or groups maybe i can open up more with my thoughts on here since i dont post a lot ^^ thanks for staying and reading

#—kuritalk...#i.... ranted #LOVED LOVED LOVED ditto #newjeans #ditto #newjeans ditto

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minijenn · 5 months

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Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: Bee Movie

According to all known laws of aviation... eh, forget it. You know the rest.

So uh... Bee Movie is surprisingly pretty good? Yeah, I know, I'm surprised too. I mean of course, Bee Movie is an Iconic Staple of Meme Culture and for good reason, its humor is just... probably some of the most insane shit out of Dreakworks ever (more on that in a bit). But it's also a pretty compelling roller coaster ride of a movie that held my rapt interest the whole way through???

So what's the story here? Barry B Benson is a bee who ventures outside the hive and meets a florist named Vanessa, whom he of course falls in love with (and she falls for him too, its fuckin weird man). Eventually, Barry discovers that humans make a profit off the backs of bees by selling their honey, so he decides to sue the entire human race. Yeah that's really the fuckin plot they came up with. It's fucking wild, man, from start to end.

Our characters here are just as wild to match that crazy ass plot. Barry is a snarky lil fella, but you can tell he cares about his... people? Bees? Idk man this movie has short circuited my brain. Anyway, Barry is a fun character to follow as our main. Vanessa is a little less developed and kind of all over the place personality wise, and well... she falls for a bee. Enough said. Barry's best friend Adam is cool, almost dies from stinging a guy, so that's fun. We also have Ken, Vanessa's ex-boyfriend who literally gets cuckolded by a bee this movie is actually insane.

The comedy here is just... ridiculous. Again, there's a reason why this movie has produced so many iconic memes. I cackled out loud at some of these jokes and references, many of which I imagine would probably go over a kid's head (the Sting and Ray Liotta jokes especially like... c'mon those are some deep cuts). It's kind of breaking the recent trend I've been noticing from Dreamworks where they're aiming down for a younger audience. Instead, Bee Movie harkens back to their earlier movies, aimed more at adults with blink and you miss them naughty jokes that are actually really funny here?

The animation is also like... insanely impressive for the time this came out? Some of the camera angles and movement on these bees is just... amazing? The flying scenes really make you feel like you're flying along with Barry, taking you through densely colorful and sometimes actually beautiful setpieces. I also enjoyed the worldbuilding inside of the hive and all of the little devices they use to produce honey. I feel like this movie is doing what Antz was trying to do, but accomplishing it so much better, with way less Rancid vibes than Antz had.

The music is also fairly solid, not as many pop songs as you'd expect from a memey movie like this, but the ones that are very are pretty good and backed by a competent score. I think my biggest gripe with this film is... well, it's a little all over the place and out of focus? Like one minute it's about Barry struggling to figure out what he wants to do with his relatively short life, then its about him falling for Vanessa, then its about suing the humans, then its about restarting pollenation so the entire planet won't shrivel up and die? (yeah did I mention this film has an environmental message?) Really, this movie is kind of just... a jack of all trades and a master of none? All of its various plots are ok, but none of them are standout fantastic. It's just... a little messy??

But really, I did enjoy myself watching this movie. I didn't think I was going to, because its been years since I've seen it and well, the internet rags on it all the time, but it's surprisingly well-made! It really is Dreamworks at their most Dreamworks (warts and all) and I think that's a testament to why its so memorable (in both good and bad ways lol). Anyway I just got one last thing to say before wrapping up this review:

Ya like jazz?

Overall Rating: 7/10

Verdict: Watch the Entire Bee Movie but every time they say literally anything the movie starts over until you die

Previous Review (Shrek the Third)

Next Review (Kung Fu Panda)

#jen watches #dreamworks watch #bee movie #jen tortures herself with every dreamworks animated movie ever #dreamworks

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phanfictioncatalogue · 7 months

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Fics With Titles That Start With F (3) Masterlist

part one, part two

Failure by Design (ao3) - worriedpeach (skeletonflowers)

Summary: Being friends with benefits doesn’t work, the movies and media showing that they always fall in love. After starting their friends with benefits arrangement, Dan and Phil are expecting to fall in love, but they aren’t disappointed when it doesn’t happen. They are content, and that’s all that matters.

Falling for You (ao3) - brightblackholes

Summary: Based on the prompt “You found me hanging by my fingertips from your window and i don’t want to tell you i was trying to rob you but idk how else to explain this and i don’t want to go to jail and also you’re kind of cute we should make out when i’m not clinging onto your window ledge for my life”

family - phillestatos

Summary: When Dan met Phil, she never thought an eighteen-year-old boy could change his son’s life in that way and how he could become family to her. Or, a reflexion of Dan and Phil’s relationship through the years in Phil’s mum point of view.

family (found) (ao3) - huphilpuffs

Summary: Dan reflects on his friendship with Martyn.

Family matters (ao3) - chiridotalaevis

Summary: Being around the Lesters always causes mixed feelings in Dan.

family reunions and hurt feelings (ao3) - counting2fifteen

Summary: Just because you're family doesn't mean you always get along.

OR:

Adrian brings his new girlfriend to Easter dinner, and Dan doesn't like her.

Family's What You Make Of It (ao3) - auroraphilealis (peachrayne)

Summary: It starts when Dan stumbles through the door of his two bedroom flat with an attractive stranger attached to his mouth, and it ends with, well… a family. Or, the one where Dan is a single father of a three year old, who intends for Phil to be nothing more than a one night stand until he see’s him interact with his daughter for the first time.

Famous Last Words (ao3) - whalefairyfandom12

Summary: In a world where the last words your soulmate will say to you are written on your wrist, fearful and introverted Phil works in a bookstore. His greatest fear? The words counting down the seconds until he meet his soulmate, someone called ‘Dan.’ But it isn’t until he befriends a university student that he nicknames ‘Bear’ that Phil realizes that surviving through fear isn’t the same as living.

Fan Letters (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: While bored in quarantine Phil (with the help of Dan) decides to go through some fan letters from a decade ago. Finding a piece of history he didn't know he'd ever lost.

familiar perspectives (ao3) - cityofphanchester

Summary: Kath twinkles in Dan’s direction, and he knows she’s been watching his hands move across the puzzle. “Is he, now? Shame you’re stuck with him, then.”

(scenes from the isle, oct ‘21.)

Feel Good Inc. - melancholymango

Summary: Dan is your local sexually ambiguous religious boy. Phil is your local bad boy that sleeps with anyone that’ll have him and sins as if second nature. Then there’s also the poor original character that gets caught between them and their ridiculous amount of sexual tension. Threesomes, eh?

Finally (ao3) - thatsthephan

Summary: an engagement/marriage Dan and Phil AU:)

Finally, Christmas With You (ao3) - lazyfic

Summary: Phil wakes up horny Christmas morning and finally has Dan with him to take care of it.

Find Your Own Freedom (and Live Life on Your Terms) (ao3) - thoughtfullightcollection

Summary: Phil’s inclusion in Dan’s video, his supportive retweet of the link to it, had exposed Phil as much as it had Dan. They’d known it would, had planned it together, taken this step together, as they did every big decision they made.

Fire and Petrol (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: There’s a Halloween Gathering in London, Phil will be down there tomorrow. It’ll be the first time they’ve seen each other since Dan was up north for three days and Phil’s entire world flipped on its side.

A fic about eager unsureness and sharpie.

Fire meet gasoline (ao3) - LiterallyAmazingPhan

Summary: This is a story about love and loss. It’s about when light reaches the darkness and swallows it whole. It’s about touching fire and letting it burn through you; about falling in too far and not finding your way back out. It’s about setting yourself on fire and watching as you burn alive.

first night away (ao3) - iihappydaysii

Summary: dan and phil enjoy each other on their first night away. (inspired by their late night instastories.)

first things first (ao3) - yoongioss

Summary: Dan knows that sex doesn’t need to happen for a relationship to be real, to be alive, and to be wholesome. But, he wants to settle his urges and his ideas and they’re only for Phil.

He is all for Phil.

First to Listen (To Anything I Said) (ao3) - SylvesterLester

Summary: It's 2004, and Dan Howell is screwing up in school. He can't help that he's stuck in boring classes with boring people and just doesn't care. So when Phil Lester, one of the geekiest kids in school, is assigned to be his tutor, he's expecting this to just be another crappy part of his already crappy life.

But when it turns out Phil might be Dan's first real friend, his hormones threaten to screw all that up. Because that's all it is, right? Hormones?

Flagged - littlephanfics

Summary: Phil works as an Internet security officer whose job is to read flagged emails and send out warnings for a magazine company. Little did he know, he’s about to get hooked on emails from a certain someone. Based loosely on Rainbow Rowell’s Attachments.

Flatmates (ao3) - intoapuddle

Summary: oh my god they were flatmates / the fuckboy!phil au we all deserve

Fools - mairieuxes

Summary: Dan Howell likes to pretend someone he isn’t. But then Phil Lester comes along and suddenly he feels like a wilted flower after a rain shower.

For Better Or For Worse (ao3) - Junebug1312

Summary: Dan thinks he might not be entirely straight. Will a Porn Challenge video clear things up for him?

Frat Boy Fuck (ao3) - philcantwerk

Summary: dan and phil are both cocky frat boys that love beer almost as much as they love each other. dan, drunk and horny, challenges phil to a game of beer pong: whoever wins, tops. may the games begin

freak (ao3) - bloodyscarab

Summary: i'm a freak, yeah i know,

know you like to hear me say it

freak by shygirl

Friday Afternoon - cafephan

Summary: At the same time for the last month or so, Dan and Phil have made a habit of ‘meeting’ in the private bathroom. But one day, they are caught in the act by an unexpected visitor, and must find a way to get out of the inevitable interrogation and following consequences.

Fuck The Past (Dan vs Phil vs Daniel) (ao3) - phandomsub

Summary: Daniel and Phil decide to mess around with a book of spells for their new video. It’s all just a good laugh, until they somehow end up transporting 18-year-old Dan from 2009 into 2017. The only logical solution is: threesome.

Fuck Your Cereal (ao3) - cyanica

Summary: Four times Dan got justice for his cereal, and one time where Phil won their prank war using a person's certain first video... that's still on the internet for some reason.

Full Northern (ao3) - Spiteful_Letters

Summary: In this universe, Dan never meets Phil and he goes on to become a successful, pretentious actor. Meanwhile Phil carries on with his YouTube career, though he cant shake the feeling that something is missing.

When Dan falls on hard times he is forced to upheave his life and move to Manchester where he meets the quirky yet irritating 'AmazingPhil' and they begin filming videos together to make ends meet. Can he overcome his snobbish prejudices against YouTube and learn the error of his ways? Will he fall for Phil in the process? Read on to find out!

Full of Words I Don’t Know How to Say (ao3) - JudeAraya

Summary: Snuggles, sex, and big feelings.

Fun With Nail Polish (ao3) - Cadensaurus

Summary: In which Dan paints his and Phil's nails and Phil is a kinky little shit

#phanfictioncatalogue #phanfic #phan #phanfiction #masterlists #ficsf #ficsf masterlist

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kpophubb · 2 years

Note

Hello 👋

You're so sweet 🥺 your response made sooo smiley and happy :')

Airi is such a UWU name 🤧 💓 I wanna add more to Hee Cat Dad concept.

Yeah he gets jealous when you talk about Minho and tries to be soo much better. Gets v giggly and his pride swells when you talk about how much of an amazing and caring dad he is (heart about to burst when you call him a dad). Very happy you don't pay attention to other cat dads but what happens when the baby doesn't pay attention to the father ? 😲

Imagine the kitten spending more time with Wonnie (another cat 🐈 😩💓) or just wants to be in Riki's lap (Riki- Resident Cat Lover) while the boy coos at her and calls her precious and what not. Hee dad is not happy. It's been over an hour and Airi still only wants to be with the maknaes 😟🥺 definitely picks her up and brings her back to your place. Tries to stay mad and not give her as much love and treats as he usually does. But then realizes how ridiculous he is being. So he ends up cuddling her on the couch. Feeding her milk from the bottle while he tells her to not pay much attention to anyone else other than him or his mom. 🤯💓💞🙊

After some time of having Airi, Hee still gets blushy and giggly thinking of her as you two's daughter. Thinks about wanting another child. Maybe not a human child for now. But what about another cat daughter ?? Or son 🤔 he gets all red and heated up thinking about it 😁😁🤭 maybe you both will get a Siamese kitten like you mentioned you wanted.

Also ik this is getting long but I wanna add one last thing-

It's Saturday morning. After a late end to your movie night. You and hee wake up when your cats climb up your bed and start meowing. Hee takes Airi in his embrace, while you take your other cat in yours. Hee still has his hand around you so your all cuddling together. You both feel soo happy and domestic at that moment. You never want it to end or be interrupted. But alas you all felt hungry. Before getting up tho Hee gets his phone from the bedstead and takes a selfie of all four of you.

Soft lighting, white comforter can be seen. Airi snuggling into Hee. Hee looking at you and Siamese kitty. And you just have your eyes closed while smiling so widely. Yeah that's def his fav picture ever and stays as his wallpaper.

I am so glad you agree with me on the name Ddongsik 😭💗 also GOOD LUCK WITH MED SCHOOL 🏫 👍 ilysm I'd love to be your Hee Annonie ITS SUCH A CUTE NAME. I'll def try and interact more :) ♡♡♡ byee hope you have a great day ☆☆

Your Hee Annonie

Aaah more hee cat dad agenda <3🥺 yep our cute dad will defn get a lil sulky and pouty when airi spends more time with the maknaes >.< he just watches silently from the corner and keeps poking her so she leaves wonie’s lap and comes to him instead. Will be so dramatic afterwards like you said,, remember in the en- video, he was saying things like “is this how much your love lasts?” “It’s over??” When the kitten wasn’t crawling on his lap again. He will be so cute when he’s upset but melt immediately and the heart smile will be back when airi mewls at him again. Will brush his nose with hers gently and kiss her. 🥺 and XHSBXHSBSHDJ WHEN he sees her playing w wonki for longer than he expected and WORSE- when y/n sits in between the two and all three of them play together with airi, he will be so “😩😒”. He might even go and pick y/n and airi up on his shoulders and go like “bye” before running away with them. Not a possessive person at all, but he feels sth different when it comes to his cute little family ☺️👉🏻👈🏻 just wants all the moments with you guys. and YES! He will definitely get a male cat, and we are naming him hikari!! For sure!! It means “light” in Japanese. The light of our lives 🥺🔆 hee will be so excited about having his son 🙊 that he’s gonna play with hikari with a basketball >~< you walk in the living room too often and see heeseung passing the ball to your adorable little son who’s so clueless about the rules but still plays along anyway :p to make hee daddy happy <33 🥰 bc he’s so loved and precious! And the domestic moments? He will not only set the picture as wallpaper but also put the picture in a frame and set in on your bed side table 😭 *family picture moment* AND AND show the members his new Home Screen and flaunt about it. Fanboy over you. Talk about how much he loves you and your children. How happy he is to have such a adorable family. Heeseung will also take breaks from work often now, only to spend more time with you guys and have more of your sweet, domestic moments that fulfill him from the inside.💚

now coming back to you, my hee anonie 😘🥺💚 remember to take care of yourself bc you must be in study pressure too often! Take breaks and sleep well <3 I’ll try to provide you as much entertainment and happiness as I can to make you smile biig <33. Sending you love and wishing you an even better day, lovie 💖

#mia’s asks #engene 💌#my hee anonie #hee cat dad agenda 😭💚🐈🥺

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the-firebird69 · 5 days

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DeVille or Devil? 😈 #mafia

I know which card is and it's this a****** Trump and I'm going to take it and yeah I bury him with it

It's in the Goodfellas movie any sorosis and he gets shot and we drive off and repair him with his own shovel which is missing now I see where it is

Robert de Niro and it's my character AKA Tommy f

Well you're dead you loser I was going to pick up one of these too or both and he says you're nuts you little piece of s*** and now my son is saying it.

Trump

Good riddance on titan you piece of crap

Zues

I don't think I'm going there but yeah it's me and I know cheeseman wears it as himself and people have seen the cosplay so yeah I'll probably die he says yeah you're going to die and tell me after someone who's going to get rid of you Tommy f is going to get rid of you cuz he already shot you in the green zone in your spaz and an idiot and that's when you turn it into a sour piece of crap and it was a long time ago you think it was before 98

He says that last part and really I don't mean to pick him up in very and I keep saying it and I'm trying stuff and Tommy f2 and we're going to buy it we can't stop he says you have to stop but you won't and you die every day this is just icing on the cake but it's a Max and they're doing a preempting and I'm so sick of you because you don't do the work and you don't do anything I do understand what you're saying the codes right there to put out to mine try and stop this try and stop that do this little fast change this over we're doing nothing but doing what they want and it's horrific. And yeah I'm going to go up there and I'm going to probably die he says it's advertising the nozzles it's neither here nor there it's it's kind of a cheap job cuz you can see them you know it's funny and really they're testing it it's horrible it's working for them and I'm putting the shovel in there I'm going to go after Tommy f and it starts saying I'm going after these two

Trump

You really can't be trusted I catch you trying to go after him so many damn times and threat or not you have to stop and it's so bad and everyone's getting us because of you it's really really wrong

You can't do it means it's going to be wrong every time you try it and we're going to get hurt and Tommy f is probably making it happen he also put the bugs down there and the stupid frogs it's the closest s*** I've ever seen all of it is to threaten and capture us the higher ups and the capture him and the torture and threatened him and he's losing like madness and he just won't stop I tell you these Max are nuts they're having him do it and he can't stop either what are we supposed to do allow you to harm us and this kid's been shot at three times by him that's enough everybody's had enough for you guys I did it a few times and it stopped I did a few times and once in a while but nothing like you that's ridiculous here on them all the time I try to stop you and I end up on it and it's you doing that but you've been injured really really badly and it was him we think it was Tommy F and he says no I think it's JC who shot him and give Tommy have a break but really he's going to pull that thing off and then the pseudo empire will pull in and the foreigners and the max and we have to make sure the foreigners doing it's our job it's a job taking her to leave it if we leave the factory it's a floating work week but if we don't come back or trying to sabotage it

Dan

That's what I get something we have a job and now it's identified finally

Trump

It doesn't have to be allowed does it and yeah I guess so that's the job and really you guys are not going to hold the fort and we're tired of you picking on him you're nuts go pick on someone else

Thor Freya

And yeah he was going to go and say he's going after Tommy f and we know who it is with a shovel is Trump and he just didn't say it right no he lost track of it he's trying to go after these two cuz their son doesn't like this kind of message he never has you keep on sticking it to him

Olympus

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mlobsters · 2 months

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supernatural s15e7 last call (w. jeremy adams)

this bit with eileen is cute

DEAN It means I got to... I got to get out of here, okay? I just... I got to... I'm gonna take a drive, clear my head. SAM Alone? DEAN Yeah, you know, you and Eileen, you guys are having fun. I don't want to spoil that, you know? SAM Yeah, go, go. Clear your head. Eileen and I have stuff to do. DEAN Yeah, I'll bet you do. Yeah? Hmm? SAM It's not like that. I-I-I meant looking for Chuck and Lilith and... DEAN Sure. Got it. Um, okay, but if, uh, things go your way, just make sure you put the sock on the door so I know.

throwing a love interest at sam real fast out of the blue and i'm like hey wait slow down what now? and i mean, we're not completely blindsided, they set up the flirty thing between them before she died and all. but having her pop back up, sam turned into a witchy genius and finished rowena's spell licketysplit, magicked up her a fresh body and now they're getting drunk at night and making hangover breakfasts in the bunker in the morning. that's a lot. and dean bolting out of there too to stay busy and let them be alone. anyway, solo hunt and lying about it, that always goes well

i dunno, man. i'm having a hard time believing dean would be okay with dumping his cell off no questions asked just walking into this bar

i don't think i'm in the right mindset to watch dean flirting and gallivanting living his swayze road house dreams

next day, not sure it's improved (i've been sick [stomach variety] coming up on a week, i am so tired of this) but maybe i can get it done anyway.

i gather this dude christian kane must be a music friend too since i guess they have a bandmate in common, steve carlson? i tried to watch leverage but it didn't grab me, i think it made it through a season or so? and funnily enough, the music kind of put me off 🥴 the cheesiest of heist music

i watched the trailer for road house from 1989 (because apparently there's a new road house (2024) with gyllenhall) and wow. something about bouncing people in pleated pants. i probably would have enjoyed it when i was teenager but i think i need the modern sensibilities of the remake if i'm gonna enjoy a big ridiculous action movie that focuses on just punching the shit out of each other :p

the tone of this scene where sam's about to kiss eileen is just weird. the music is kind of.. mushy wistful, like the mushy music theme but different. and there's a lot of awkward exchanging of looks. and then sam gets clued in what eileen's talking about. i'm just really not picking up what they're putting down. but get a big dramatic interruption with cas popping back in.

also fucking netflix and its caption placement is consistently awful.

CASTIEL Good. I've been thinking about that gun, the, uh... the Equalizer? When you shot God, it fired a piece of your soul.

his SOUL. sure. SURE

DEAN Man, so I don't think I've seen you since Sammy was in college.

gotta tally up all the hunters they mentioned he worked with while sam was in college. think richie too? sure there's others

from 3x04 sin city SAM Not too bad. How do you two know each other? DEAN You were in school. RICHIE It was that succubus, in Canarsie right?

CASTIEL No, but I am sure I can't heal the wound. Maybe I can probe it. SAM Probe it? CASTIEL Study it, see if it can lead us to Chuck.

jamming his fist into sam's chest rooting around for his non-existent soul, sucking the leftover angel grace out of his neck with a needle, what's a little probing of a soul wound from god

DEAN Okay. One, three bottles of Jaeger is nobody's friend, and "B," they were twins.

may have just yelled, BRO! DAMNIT! lol i thought we were done with the 1, B (A, 2) thing that drives me up a WALL whenever it comes up because i can't find the paul reiser mad about you reference to him doing it despite being quite sure that he used it a lot in that show

LEE Whoa, no, they were not twins. They were triplets, uh, and we split them up fair and square.

dean and dudes and triplets.

from 10x01 black DEAN Okay, see, the deal was we howl at the moon -- no time stamp, no expiration date. CROWLEY We've howled. We've bayed. We've done extraordinary things to triplets, all of which have been massively entertaining. I will treasure our Flickr albums forever. But now it's time for us to accept what we are and go back to work.

DEAN Trust me, uh, bigger doesn't always equal better. Besides, who's gonna look out after the little guy? God certainly isn't. LEE Damn, brother, that's dark. DEAN Yeah, it's been a rough, uh... it's been a rough decade, Lee.

understatement of the century

(wiki)

The band at Swayze's Bar is a band made up of the Supernatural crew called The Impalas that has played together for many years. Here they are called "The Texas Impalas" and are made up of Perry Battista, Tracy Dunlop, Dave Webb, Cam Beck, and Chris Glynn Jones.

that's neat. i'm glad at least we got some dean singing that wasn't intentionally cringey. i feel like this episode is fan service, but dean/jensen is the main fan in question lol

SERGEI Small thing. CASTIEL What is it? SERGEI Sam is... dying.

of course he is! he's almost dead or actually dead CONSTANTLY. jesus.

and dean's buddy acting shifty, of course. also rolling my eyes that they had this friend insist that the car was raptured based on no info

SERGEI Ah, well, there you go. Most wounds want to be healed, to be whole. But this, this wound is different. It goes down to his very soul. But also out into the world. From what I can tell, his soul, it's connected to something or someone somewhere. Except, as you probed deeper, you forced the soul to stretch from Sam's body to... EILEEN Where? SERGEI I don't know. But now it's like a rubber band. If it is stretched too far, too long, pop, it snaps, and Sam dies.

LOL sure. they've destroyed my suspension of disbelief i just can't haha and castiel's face made me laugh

and now cas just had supposedly bobby?? watching this rando's niece so he could threaten with killing her to get what he wants? sure!

LEE Well, not the old me, anyway. I wasn't kidding about Arizona. What that thing did to that family, those kids, it stuck in my head. If evil like that exists in the world, then guys like you and me, we ain't ever gonna win. The best we can do is just have a little fun. The last Hunt I did, the one right around here, I found something.

very logical and sense-making

LEE You don't, Dean? I am you. I'm just you that woke up and saw that the world was broken. DEAN Then you fix it. You don't walk away. You fight for it.

dean-o gets to remember the lesson that he does actually care and is willing to fight even if it's unclear what's god pulling strings vs his distinct choice

LEE Why do you care so much, Dean? DEAN Because someone has to. LEE Well, then... I'm glad it was you.

uh huh. insert another eyeroll lol. ugh. i'm being an asshole but they lost me :p

SAM Dean, Chuck is weak. I think we can beat him. I think we can beat God.

okie doke. team free will whatever dot whatever, back at it

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 15x07 #spn clip #jeremy adams #christopher lennertz #tim wynn #spn musical score

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adamwatchesmovies · 5 months

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Polaroid (2019)

Even if you're craving a “killer photography” movie, Polaroid is hardly worth your time. The film only manages to surprise you when it proves even more poorly written than you expected. I suspect some heavy last-minute changes are responsible for the bewilderment I felt.

Photography enthusiast Bird Fitcher (Kathryn Prescott) receives an antique polaroid camera from her co-worker. After he dies that same night, Bird and her friends suspect the photo she took of him might have something to do with his untimely demise. Could the mysterious shadow in the background be a malevolent spirit? Can the initials “RJS” carved onto the case lead them to the bottom of this mystery?

I won't say a movie about a killer camera is doomed. The original Shutter is quite effective and in many ways resembles this film. What it definitely isn't is naturally scary. Looking at “Polaroid”, you’d think writer/director Lars Klevberg had never seen more than one horror film. It’s made abundantly clear this story takes place in modern-day but when Bird and her doomed friends Avery (Katie Stevens), Mina (Priscilla Quintana), Kasey (Samantha Logan) and Devin (Keenan Tracey) go to the library to investigate the initials "RJS", all they sift through are old newspapers. They don’t even TRY to look it up online. Worse, they do such a poor job researching the initials on the camera, it’s a wonder any of them have made it to high school.

There’s a minor mystery introduced at the beginning of the story. Bird is always wearing a scarf. The police allude to an accident in the past, how she was “So brave”. We know it has something to do with her dead father. What happened to her neck to give her that nasty scar? Why is she being called brave? We never find out. It's not the only aspect that ultimately, means nothing. When we find out what is driving the camera's evil entity, you'll question why the opening scene - in which a stupid teenager (Sarah, played by Madelaine Petsch) wanders into a dark, spooky attic to investigate noises without a flashlight before getting herself killed - was included.To let the audience know they're watching a horror movie? It must be, because the girl has nothing to do with the mystery. Combined with the ridiculous explanation for the ghost/monster, you have to wonder if some executive looked at the movie and told Mr. Klevberg “Listen, even with all the jump scares you’ve crammed in, this movie is not scary. The characters are dummies whose parents apparently don’t exist, there are obvious plot holes throughout and your mystery is awful. It’s impossible to fix all of those without starting over completely so at least change the monster’s true motivation so everyone can’t say they saw it coming right away”.

If I have to say something good about Polaroid, it’s that I didn’t see the mystery's solution coming… but I resent the movie for cheating and making it impossible to decipher. Instead, I'll call out the “best scene”, which is so preposterous it’s kind of awesome in its awfulness. So in all of these kinds of movies, the question is always “why don’t they just smash the BLANK”. In this movie, they try to smash the camera and it just doesn’t break. When they try to burn the picture(s) that foreshadow everyone's deaths, whatever damage happens to the Polaroid also happens to the people inside it. This means there are actually two ways for the camera to get you. Firstly, getting your picture taken means you've been marked by the entity. Secondly, trying to get it off your scent by destroying the photo will kill you. Then, something crazy happens. The monster (whose design is completely forgettable) actually kills someone voodoo-doll style by destroying the picture they're in. It’s such a bizarre scene no one who sees it could ever forget it.

Polaroid is a complete misfire. The constant use of cheap jump scares makes it frustrating. The monster is lame. The mystery is a cheat. Considering its laughable final confrontation and frustrating twists, I'd sooner recommend watching Goosebumps’ Say Cheese and Die. At least that only lasts 30 minutes. (August 13, 2021)

#Polaroid #Lars Klevberg #Blair Butler #Kathryn Prescott #Samantha Logan #Tyler Young #Javier Botet #Mitch Pileggi #2019 movies #2019 films

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alightinthelantern · 11 months

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film reviews: Kin-dza-dza!

Synopsis: A 1986 Soviet science fiction dystopian black comedy film about two earthlings who get transported to a post-apocalyptic desert planet named Pluk in the Kin-dza-dza Galaxy, who must survive among the strange inhabitants while trying to get home. The planet is inhabited by Patzaks and Chatlanians, two species physically identical to humans who can communicate telepathically, and the only words they say out loud are “Koo”, which refers to all things good, and “Kyu”, which is a socially-acceptable expletive. Pluk is a Chatlanian planet, which means the Chatlanians are in charge and the Patzaks are socially inferior to them and must pay obeisance through strange rituals, but there are other planets in the system which are Patzak planets, where the social order is reversed. The two Earthlings, a Russian named Vladimir and a Georgian nicknamed The Fiddler (he is carrying someone else’s violin and cannot actually play it) team up with a Chatlanian/Patzak duo to try to raise the money necessary to buy a component needed to enable their flying ship for interplanetary travel in order to get back to Earth, and a sense of camaraderie develops between the four despite the Pluk duo abandoning the Earthlings and leaving them for dead multiple times.

Review: The Soviets were great at writing compelling serious films, but not so great at writing comedies. This movie is funnier than other Soviet comedies I’ve seen, in that it’s mildly funny while the others aren’t funny at all (perhaps Russian humor is very bleak and I just don’t get it?) but I wouldn’t watch this movie expecting laughs. It’s funny at the beginning, when the Earth duo first meet the Pluk duo in a hilariously weird first encounter, but the film soon loses its humor and takes a more serious bent as it shows the wasteland of the planet and the various inhabitants who live in hovels and eek out a living there. There are scenes where the Earth duo play the violin and sing, both very badly, in order to earn money, which are supposed to be funny, but they’re not funny. There’s also a scene where a Little Person walks through a crowd wearing yellow pants, which is a sign of social prestige on the planet, and everyone pays him respect. I think this is supposed to be funny because the idea of a Little Person receiving obeisance is seen as ridiculous, which is of course offensive. The last chunk of the movie loses the attempts at humor entirely and turns more into an action film as the Earth duo stage an insurrection to break the Pluk duo out of prison not once but twice, and they fly away to another planet for a respite whose population and atmosphere were both completely destroyed. I also thought it was uneven that the Pluk duo spend the first half of the movie abandoning the Earthlings three or four different times and otherwise helping them only reluctantly, and the Earthling duo spends the second half of the movie repeatedly trying to save them from eternal imprisonment despite their clear selfishness. The moral discrepancy is an odd choice from a writing standpoint and I would’ve liked the Pluk duo to “earn” their salvation in some small way at least, as they never abandon their selfish, mercantile ways for a moment.

From all the movies I’ve seen, a good general rule of thumb seems to be that the Soviets write better dramas, but the West writes better comedies. I don’t know, maybe watch the film if it sounds like an interesting science fiction film to you, but don’t watch it if you want a comedy, because it’s really a serious film and there’s very little that’s funny in it. It’s on YouTube, and you can watch it here.

#films #movies #cinema #film reviews #movie reviews #Kin dza dza!#Russian cinema #personal

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earthtolottie · 2 years

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Title: Not Like the Movies Fandom: Shadowhunters Pairing: Climon (Clary Fray & Simon Lewis) Summary: Who would have though that becoming one of the undead would come with such unusual aversions? Simon Lewis certainly didn’t and he proclaims to be a well-versed expert on all things Vampires. It’s a good thing he has his best friend Clary by his side to help him through. Word Count: 2,172

Prompt: “No one ever warns you about stuff like this.”

“I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, I really hate snow,” Simon grumbles, his whole body stiff and shivering as he allows his best friend, Clary Fray to guide him slowly into his bedroom. Each step was rigid and to Simon it felt like it was taking a decade to move but before he knew it, she was helping him to gently settle down on the bed. She hovers for a second, her hands raised to make sure that he wasn’t about to fall forward before reaching out to grab the thick comforter and throwing it around his shoulder. “I mean, I get that it’s December and Christmas is fast approaching but seriously, why does there have to be so much snow?”

“I don’t know what you’re complaining for. You’ve lived in New York for as long as I have so you know what the weather’s like this time of year,” Clary points out as she tucks the sides of the comforter around Simon’s chest. “And as I recall before we even left the apartment, I did say that you didn’t have to come with me. I know your Mom and Sister well enough to pick something out on your behalf but no, you were the one who said you’d be fine. In fact, I believe your exact words were ‘I have died and gone through the struggle of transitioning into one of the undead... I can handle a little winter snowfall.”

Simon opens his mouth to protest but Clary continues on.

“Protest all you want but at the end of the day, this is all down to you not listening and leaving your winter jacket at home.” Clary pauses for a second as she moves towards Simon’s dresser, pulling open the top drawer and rummaging around for a second before picking out a fresh pair of cotton socks. She glances warily at the mess of a drawer for another second before she goes to kneel in front of him, fresh socks still in hand as she starts to remove his soaking shoes and socks, discarding them behind her as she adds, “Anyway, Raphael did warn you about the effects the snow would have on you now.”

Simon lets out a weak scoff at that last part.

It’s true that the grumpy Vampire had mentioned something or other about the effects the weather can have on a Vampire’s body, newly-turned or not and okay, yes... he may have also said something about requesting Simon to not go out anywhere over the next few days, at least until the worst of the snow has fallen. Still, Simon was skeptical. He had seen enough movies about Vampires and had even participated in his own research when he first turned to doubt what the older man was saying.

Rigor Mortis... even saying it in his mind sounded ridiculous.

As if Simon had needed another reminder that he was now just a small percentage of the undead.

Simon thought that it was the most made-up thing he’s ever heard. There’s no way that Raphael could have been serious about the information he was dishing out. The miserable Vampire was older and more experienced when it came down to living as one of the undead but perhaps it was also possible that he was old enough for his facts to have become muddled with fiction. It had to be some kind of weird fledgling initiation... it just had to be.

Clary straightens up, her arms folded over her chest as she glowers down at him.

Simons couldn’t help but note how adorable she looked when she was trying to keep her expression sombre and serious. He fights the grin that was trying to make its way onto his lips but it falls a few seconds later as he thinks over Raphael’s words once more. Simon was so sure that the Vampire was playing a joke on him as it just doesn’t make any logical sense. Then again, has anything appeared to have any logical reasoning since he was thrown head-first into this world? No.

Still, he lets out a sigh and says in a quiet voice, “I didn’t think he was serious.”

Clary doesn’t say anything in response; she knows all too well what Simon was thinking and couldn’t help but feel for him.

If it wasn’t for her, then Simon wouldn’t even know anything about the Shadow World. He would still be living a normal life. He would still be attending classes at the local College in order to complete his Degree. He would still spend his Saturday morning’s going to Java Jones and the Comic Book store, picking up the latest issue of whatever Superhero he was into that month. He would still be hanging out with his ‘band’, doing anything but actually making music... but he’s not.

Instead, he ended up following Clary when she went on the search for her Mom. He ended up needing a place to stay whilst being chased by Demons. He had refused to leave Clary alone with Jace, even though she had insisted that she would be fine with him. Clary should have known that Simon wouldn’t have turned his back on her, especially not when she was so worried about her Mom. That was jus the kind of friend Simon was; he wouldn’t let you face anything alone. He was always there to be a shoulder to cry on, and he was someone Clary could trust with absolutely everything. In a way, Clary was glad that Simon had followed her as she couldn’t bear the idea of exploring this strange new world without her best friend, but she still couldn’t stop the guilt from coursing through her entire body.

When she stops to really think about it, it’s not Simon’s fault at all.

Simon was in this state because of her.

Simon had been turned into a Vampire because she had wanted answers and had allowed Jace to lead her into the heart of the Clan’s territory.

If anyone was to blame here, then it was Clary.

Pushing those thoughts aside, she quickly shakes her head and moves to sit beside Simon on the bed. She loops an arm around his waist, relishing in the solidity of her friend and lets out a small sigh of her own before resting her head on his shoulder. She can feel Simon’s shoulders tense a little but they relax a second later and she feels the comforting weight of his own head resting against hers.

They’re quiet for several minutes and it’s Simon who speaks first.

“I know that I should have taken Raphael more seriously when he was going through the effects I’d feel but I honestly thought he was joking. Which yes, I understand is ridiculous as getting any form of humour our of Raphael would be like drawing blood from a stone but... no one ever warns you about stuff like this. I mean, seriously, how many times have you come across a movie that includes a Vampire getting paralysed by snow? Would you expect the all powerful Dracula to be paralysed by snow?”

Clary lets out a huff as she lifts her head from his shoulder and he turns his head to glance at her, his neck stiff from the cold.

“Simon, this is not like the movies. Whether you like it or not, this is real life. It’s happening right now and when it comes down to learning new facts about being a Vampire, then you need to listen to Raphael. Sure, he may be seen as grumpy and disinterested most of the time but he knows what he’s talking about and he’s trying his best to teach you everything he can because in case you hadn’t noticed, this is a pretty big deal.”

Clary motions down the length of Simon’s body as she talks and Simon can’t help but look away from her.

Instead, he looks down at his stiff, pale hands and lets out a sigh.

“Simon, can you promise me something?” Clary asked, tentatively.

“Anything,” Simon whispers after a moment, looking anywhere but in her direction because he knows that he literally would promise anything to Clary.

She thinks about the best way she could phrase her question as she focuses on Simon.

Even though he was trying not to look at her, Clary didn’t miss the tiredness that was in his eyes, she didn’t miss the way that his shoulders slumped as she spoke and she certainly didn’t miss the way that his hands trembled as he reached up for the throw blanket, grasping the soft material tightly as he attempts to stop his teeth from chattering. Simon may be a Vampire, an immortal being, but he was still her best friend and she felt saddened at the thought that he was still susceptible to weakness.

Just because he’s immortal now doesn’t mean he’s any less invincible... she thinks as she straightens up beside him.

Shoving the thought aside, she reaches out and gently cups his face, forcing him to look back at her. The action felt a little too intimate for Clary’s liking, the only time she had looked this intently at someone was when Jace had been standing close to her on the eve of her birthday when he had shown her the Institute’s Greenhouse. She quickly shakes her head. She can’t think of Jace right now so she licks her lips and waits patiently for Simon to focus his gaze on hers.

It doesn’t take long before his brown eyes are gazing into her own faded green ones.

“Promise me...” She starts, slowly. “Promise me, Simon, that once you’ve warmed up, you’ll call Raphael.”

As much as she originally wanted Simon to stay away from the Vampire, she had quickly come to realise that Simon needed Raphael if he was to survive and as far as she was aware, he hadn’t needed to be near any of the other Vampires. When he wasn’t staying in the boathouse by Luke’s Pack, he was with her at the Institute, much to Jace and Alec’s annoyance. But as she stares into his eyes, she knows that she’s doing the right thing. Raphael is the only person that can help Simon process everything that’s happened to him. As much as the Vampire tries to deny it, he remembers how it felt at the beginning and she knows that he’s still haunted by the experience.

Clary didn’t want Simon to be haunted by his transformation. Hell, he was still struggling to keep his bloodlust under control around his Mom and Sister, so if Raphael can help Simon then she’s not going to turn the Vampire away from her best friend. Vampire or not, Clary wants Simon in her life.

Simon must have picked up on what she was thinking because a second later he swallows the lump in his throat and nods.

“I promise,” Simon murmurs miserably, his eyes never straying from Clary’s as he moves forward and rests his forehead against hers.

It’s not like he has much of a choice; he’s literally the embodiment of a frozen icicle right now.

Clary tightens her grip around Simon’s waist for a second and lets out a groan as her phone starts to ring. She reluctantly pulls away from Simon, the movement causing Simon to let out a small groan of his own as he stumbles forward. Clary was ready to catch him as she uses her free hand to pull the phone out of her pocket and both Clary and Simon glance down at the Caller ID; Alec.

Frowning, Clary declines the call and shoves the phone back into her pocket, an action that has Simon grinning from ear-to-ear.

“Now that the serious talk is out of the way, how would you feel about a nice mug of Hot Cocoa and a movie?” Clary asks cheerfully as she walks away from the bed, already forgetting the interruption from the Head of the Institute. If it was important then Alec would no doubt call again.

Simon lifts his head at this suggestion, his eyes brighter than they were a few minutes ago.

“A movie? You mean... my choice?”

Clary lets out a laugh as she nods.

“Sure, Simon.”

“Alright! Sounds great, hey can you also order in some food? I’m starving!” Simon smiles, flexing his fingers to bring back more movement.

“You can make the call to Raphael to stock up your fridge but as for normal food... Chinese good?”

“Clary Fray, you never disappoint. Chinese sounds great!”

She lets out a laugh as she turns to leave his bedroom.

Simon watches her go and he can’t help but think that maybe the little inconveniences that come with being a Vampire aren’t as bad as he originally thought. If being almost paralysed by the slight snowdrift outside is enough to draw Clary away from the Institute to take care of him then maybe... maybe it’s not all bad after all.

If you would like to support future works, then please consider buying me a coffee at https://ko-fi.com/earthtolottie - I appreciate you all!

#EarthToLottie #FanFic Writer #Shadowhunters #Clary Fray #Simon Lewis #Best Friends #Winter Vibes #Lessons Learnt the Hard Way

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stayathomesurveys · 2 years

Text

034.

How are you doing today? I’m doing okay, I guess. It’s only 4:47 am.

What day of the week is it? Saturday.

What’s something you used to believe in that you don’t anymore? That I’ll ever be happy.

What do you admire most in a person? I don’t know.

What’s your favorite dinosaur? I don’t have one.

Do you believe in reincarnation? If so, what would you like to be reincarnated as? Maybe.

What are 3 scents that you like? Coffee, blueberry, cookies.

Do you ever use the grounding technique 54321? No.

What’s the silliest thing you’ve gotten injured from? I don’t know.

What’s the weirdest food combination you enjoy? I’m not sure.

Where would you relocate if you were forced to leave your place of residence? A hotel for the time being, I guess.

Do you play any instruments? No, not anymore. i got a guitar and I’ve been meaning to pick it up and try to learn, again.

What is an unpopular opinion you have? Those big, fluffy brows that are on trend right now are absolutely ugly as fuck on 99.8% of people. They look ridiculous as hell.

Have you ever done a crazy dare? No.

What’s your favorite type of cheese or cheese substitute? I don’t know.

What are things you still enjoy from your childhood? Some of the shows, movies, etc.

What smells better.. fresh baked bread or fresh brewed coffee? Fresh brewed coffee.

What’s the oddest text you’ve received recently? I don’t know. I just changed my number so very few people even have it now.

What’s something you believe everyone should have? Shelter, food, healthcare, clean water... the necessities.

What’s the first thing you do once you get home from a trip? It depends on when I get back from the trip. If I get back at a decent hour, I usually try to unpack immediately.

What has been the worst kitchen mishap you’ve made? I started a small fire in the microwave once. I’ve also microwaved ramen noodles and forgot to put water in the bowl way too many times. A horrible, horrible smell.... lots of smoke.

Do you know how your parents met? Not really. I know that they grew up in the same area and had the same group of friends, kind of. My dad is older than my mom so he was friends with her friends’ older siblings/their friends. I don’t think they met until he left the Marines and moved back to Maryland.

Do you believe love is blind? It can be.

If you could get away with it, what crime would you commit? Bank robbery or something. I need money (don’t we all) and banks are fucking assholes. I hate banks.

If you owned a restaurant, what would you serve? Not sure.

Have you ever met a president? No.

What food tastes better than its appearance to you? I dunno.

Do you actively post on social media? Not lately.

What was your favorite childhood book? Hm. Junie B. Jones, Magic Treehouse... those are the first two to come to mind.

Do you ever experience intrusive thoughts? All the time.

What do you consider to be the smartest animal? I dunno.

What movies make you laugh the most? Not sure. I don’t typically watch comedies. I will say that I’ve seen some comically horrible horror movies, and those really get me laughing.

What’s a product you use everyday that you wish you could get a lifetime supply of? Toilet paper? I don’t know.

What’s the best name you’ve heard a pet named? Don’t know.

What always makes your day better? Nothing.

Would you rather have multiple hobbies or 1 true passion? I don’t know.

Coffee or tea? Tea.

Do you listen to podcasts? Which ones? Nope.

Would you say you’re good at saving money? No, I wish that I was.

Have you ever ridden in the front of a roller coaster? I think.

Would you rather have free massages for a year or facials? Facials.

When was the last time you’ve had an adrenaline rush? I don’t know.

Have you ever used a whole chapstick? Yes.

Has anyone ever given you a gag gift? No.

#survey

0 notes

gyusfavlibra · 3 years

Text

THIS IS MY WORK! PLEASE DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ON OTHER SITES/APPS!!!!

Warnings: +18, smut, fingering, hand job, sex in bathroom, language, jealousy, fighting, arguing.

Y/n and Sarah sat quietly on Kie's bed as they waited for Kiara to stop degrading the lavender dress she wore while standing in her large mirror. Mrs. Carrera coming through the door to make sure the girls were all dressed. "This is disgusting."

"I know it's just horrible."

"I'm asking you guys to just relax and go to a fun party."

"I look like a bourgeoisie pig."

"I think you look beautiful," y/n said while shrugging at Kie. She just gave a smile back to her, still hating the look no matter what compliments were given.

"Will you please not worry about socioeconomic injustice for one night?"

"Mom, people not three miles from her have no power, no running water, and we're going to Midsummers."

"That's so tone deaf."

"Y/n," the mother scolded at her niece. "Do you know how hard we had to work to get into the Island club?"

"Yeah, mom. How could I forget? You had to grovel for, like, ten years--"

"Twelve years, and we also had to cough up a huge chunk of dough-"

"To keep up with the Joneses-"

"No, so you had the same experiences that I had as a child."

"But weren't parents as teens out, like partying, getting drunk, making out in the backseats of their cars at drive in movies," the cousin listed while putting her things in its bag. "Getting pregnant."

"That doesn't sound fun," Sarah added.

"Do you girls even know what the Island club is?"

"A factory farm."

"For debutantes," Y/n raised her eyebrows.

"It's a nice place, with nice people where you can do fun stuff."

"With out-of-touch rich people, while the island sinks slowly into the ocean."

"Water filling the poor's destructive lungs while the wealthy ones get away on million dollar boats."

Sarah sat quietly laughing on the comfy blanketed mattress. Mr. Cerrera sighed, saying one last thing before walking out. "Okay, I want you to put on your party face, girls, if you want to live."

"Did your mom just threaten to kill us?"

"Maybe. I think so," she nods as she turned around to the duo, fixing the flower crown that sat on her cousin's head. "You nervous to see Rafe."

"Why did you have to bring that up?"

"I was curious. I know it's only been two days, but-"

"Hey, he broke up with me. So if he wants to talk, that's in his duty. Not mine. I did nothing wrong."

Sarah got off the bed, swinging on it's pole. "Except flirt with JJ, or so he says."

"I was not...flirting with JJ. He has a crush on Kiara. I'd never."

"But Rafe doesn't know that."

°°°°

*flashback*

"What if she doesn't like it?"

"She'll love it. She's hippie."

Y/n and JJ sat on John B's porch, smoking a blunt. The girl was trying to help him do something nice for Kiara so JJ could ask her out without feeling weird. He's liked her for the longest and he was finally ready to tell her how she feels.

"Alright, now practice what you're gonna say."

Just as Y/n finished saying the statement, her own boyfriend, Rafe Cameron showed up. Standing behind them listening in.

"Okay, uh, hey I have to tell you something...uh important," the blonde began speaking, using hand gestures because of his nerves. "I really really like you. Like not like friends like, but I have feelings, uhm, strong feelings for you. Because you're like super hot, andnyou're like a really cool chick. So I was wondering if maybe you'd wanna...go out with me."

"Yes, t-"

"What the hell!"

The manly unknown voice shocked them both, their figures jumping at the sound because they thought they were alone.

"Rafe, what're you doing here?"

Y/n asked confusedly as she stood from the steps. The Kook just scoffed and walked back out. Ignoring her question. She shared a glance with JJ before going to follow after him.

"Hey! Where you going? What's wrong?"

"A pogue!? Y/n, seriously?!"

"What're you talking about?"

"You're cheating on me with a pogue?" He shouted. Y/n scrunched her eyebrows, looking at the unnecessary upset individual.

"What do you mean cheating? I'm not cheating on you. We were just talking."

"Bullshit. That's bullshit! I heard it all."

"Rafe, it's not like that. Jj was just-"

"I should've known better. I should've known," he fumed. His right foot swung to kick the dirt near his truck that he was so very close to getting into.

"Known what?"

"I should've never trusted a pogue. I knew something like this was gonna happen. You were just gonna throw me away like Sarah did, Topper. Right? Huh?"

"You sound ridiculous. I was never throwing you away. I was helping him out."

"Yeah, while you're at it. Might as well help sleep with him too."

Y/n scoffed, taking a step back from the angered boy who's brain had just functioned what he said. Part of him regretted it very much. But the other part thought you deserved it because of his cheating accusation.

He opened his vehicle door. Stepping one foot inside. "We're done."

The girl just laughed with held tears reaching for the openess. She turned around to head back inside as Rafe just drove off.

°°°°

"Hey, no tearing up today. Go to this stupid thing and show him that his little cheating accusation act didn't hurt you at all. You're stronger than that."

"Thanks, Kie."

The girls finished up their last minute touches. That includes sweeping their dresses with roller for no hair, any makeup redos, or hair finishes. The ride to the country club was quiet. Well, y/n was quiet.

This would be her first time seeing Rafe since their break up a three days ago. They've been doing everything in their mighty to avoid each other. And it definitely worked. But like her friend told her, she wasn't gonna get worked up. Letting Rafe see her weak was like telling him he was right about everything. But he wasn't.

"Jesus, Kook land."

"I forgot how packed this thing is every year."

"Well, let's go. I gotta walk out with my family."

The Cameron family walked out with their heads high and the Kook crowd cheered for each one. Y/n kept her eyes gazed to Kiara since they were in the middle of a conversation. Not caring if that family came in or not. That excludes Sarah.

Rafe watched from his spot by his dad, as they exited to outside. Breath hitched when he saw Y/n and her dress. It was a dark toned red, had tulle, and a revealing chest opening.

A red flower crown on her head, complimenting her beautiful down hair. She looked amazing and hot to Rafe. He had to clear his throat before excusing himself.

"Hey," the red dresses girl heard from beside her as a hand landed on her lower back. She removed it before her eyes retracted to theirs. Kie just pursed her lips before leaving to hangout with Sarah. Y/n internally screaming that she left her there.

"What do you want?"

"Uh, you look nice."

"Okay. Thanks. You don't too. What do you want?"

"Nothing. Just saying hi."

"Bye."

"Wait, wait, wait. Why are you mad at me? Shouldn't I be the mad one here?"

"Why?"

"Because of what you did," he said with furrowed eyebrows. Y/n shrugged.

"I didn't do anything."

"Do- do you not remember what happened on the cut three days ago? The fight."

"You slut shaming me and accusing me of cheating with JJ. That? Yeah, I remember that."

"Accused? I heard you."

"Heard what exactly?"

"JJ, was telling you he liked you and thought you were a cool hippie chick, which you are not. You're not hippie. And then he asked you out and you said yes. As soon as I walked in."

Y/n stared at him blankly. Before bursting out laughing. A few guests behind them staring with a look that showed they weren't used to loud talkers or laugher. "Oh my god. You thought? Jesus that's absolutely hilarious."

"What is?"

"That you think- you think that JJ was confessing feelings to me. Whew that's rich."

"I heard it, Y/n."

"He wasn't confessing anything to me you shit head. He was practicing for when he asked out Kiara."

Rafe was confused. Majorly. Inside and out. "But she-"

"He likes Kiara. And she's my cousin. You think I'd really hurt anyone like that? How low of me do you think? Have fun at this party."

Y/n walked off to go look for her disappeared friends. Not wanting to spend another second in a spot with someone who was so rude over something he knew nothing about. Just assumed. Never asked.

As she walked down the corridors of the porch that many people stood on drinking, a hand grabbed her shoulder, turning her around. Her eyes fixated on the blonde in a black tux and a bow tie.

"Holy shit, JJ. You scared me. What're you doing here?" She asked as she hugged him.

"Well, Sarah somehow convinced her dad to let me in tonight to hangout with Kie."

"Have you seen her?"

"I was just looking for her myself. C'mon. She's probably inside."

She grabbed his hand. Pulling him inside. They found Kie just minutes later with Pope. He was working the grill with his dad. Sarah was getting raided by Topper about their own stupid shit. Y/n decided to go get herself a drink and maybe find someone to dance with.

The straw rested on her lips as she stood against the porch railing. Gazing over all the people who say around laughing, probably bragging about their money, summer vacations, their older kids getting into a good college. Typical kook things.

Her eyes focused on a specific couple talking off to the side. Her eyes burning a whole in the back of Rafe's head as he tried to flirt up a storm with some Kook she didn't know whatsoever.

Her body was fuming. Was Rafe really gonna sit in front of her and flirt with a whole other girl that isn't her. Just a few days after their breakup. It's like he's trying to play victim. And she's had it.

"Hey, Sancho. Lassie."

The brunette Rafe was talking up a storm to laughed. "I'm sorry who are you?"

"Oh, you gonna introduce me to your side piece here?"

"Would you stop? We're just talking."

"Talking? Yeah, okay," Y/n laughed. The girl just looked at her dazed. "Hi, I'm his girlfriend. Y/n. And you, yeah you're excused."

Rafe was truly enjoying this scene. Internally rooting for Y/n. He wasn't gonna object to that fact that she called herself his girlfriend. Because now that he knew the truth, it changed his perspective.

"Who do you think you are?"

"I already told you. Wh- can you not hear correctly?"

"He said he was single so, why-"

"He lied. So, you can go away now- Rafe. Let's go. We need to talk."

"What're you his mother now?" The rando questioned. Y/n turned to her and gripped her face.

"If you wanna keep these teeth, then I suggest you stop talking. Go find somebody else's boyfriend to mack on."

She dragged Rafe by his hand into the upstairs private bathroom. Locking the door behind her. "What're you doing?"

"Just having a friendly conversation. There a problem?"

"You were flirting, Rafe. That was flirting," she paced. Hand against her for head.

"Like you're any better. You lied to me."

"I've never lied about anything."

"You said JJ liked Kiara."

"Yeah. He does."

"Then why is he holding your hand, hugging you, and leaving inside with you instead of the girl he supposedly likes," Rafe argued. Gripping onto the large counter.

"Rafe, I grabbed his hand and brought him inside to find Kiara. And I hugged him because I was happy for my friend. God, Rafe how many times do I have to tell you that I am not cheating on you."

"It's kind of hard to believe that shit when I keep seeing things with my own eyes."

"Then stop assuming and come ask me. Jesus, do you not trust me or something. Because I trust you. Anytime I hear that you're at a party doing lines with hot blonde's next to you, I brush it off because I know you'd never. Why can't you just do that for me."

Rafe stood from his seat. Pinching the bridge of nose. The guilty conscience grazed through his mind as he listened to her words. He had issues with trust and with others, but he knew it wasn't a reason to take it out on the only person who's loved him for him.

"I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry. You're right. I should trust you. Just like you trust me. I'll work on it. I promise."

"Don't promise me that. Just show me that you love me just as much."

The words clicked. He did love her. And he cared about her. More than anyone in this world. And he wanted to show her. In the most physical way possible.

"C'mere."

"Why?"

"Just c'mere," he repeated as he grabbed her by her waist, pulling her closer to him. She stumbled, but Rafe's grip kept her in place. He moved his face closer to hers, lips almost touching as they grazed against each other.

He used the hand placed on her waist to grip the fabric of her dress. Pulling it upwards. Her breath hitched as he hand snaked under the red tulle and right onto her now soaking core. His pointy finger swept across the waistband of her panties.

Y/n wasn't expecting this as the outcome from their miniature argument but she wasn't complaining. And neither was Rafe.

He pushed her underwear down as much as he could from their position, before going back to her walls and making circular motions. Rafe finally closer the space, kissing her lips practically roughly as he continued rubbing her.

He kept a firm hand on her waist to make sure she had a gripping support if he legs gave out, which they indeed will. The motions stopped as Y/n pulled her lips away from his. Rafe stared at her daring eyes, questioning if she wanted his to continue.

"Put them inside me," she whispered. The Cameron smirked before obliging to her demand. He stuck to fingers into her wet cunt. A soft moan escaped her lips as he did so. Pumping them in and out of her. Y/n rubbed her hand against the erection in his dress pants.

"You like that, yeah?"

She nodded as the locked her lips. Not being able to speak because knowing if she did, she let out a loud moan and even at this club would hear.

She unbuckled his pants, putting her handninside to grip his penis and pump it as he slipped his tongue into her mouth. The hand he held to her waist was now gripped on her neck, gently. Y/n clenched around his fingers. Feeling her high come close. "Dont stop."

Rafe began pumping faster just as Y/n did so. The teens were so horny that they were both already reaching their extent. Rafe's shaft twitched in her hand. "I'm cumming."

"Do it for me."

That's all it took for Y/n to finish. And Rafe too. His liquids filling her hands as they both let out moans due to their intense actions. In one swift motion, Rafe snaked a hand around Y/n's waist turning then so she was against the counter. Her pulled the straps of her dress of her shoulders, leaving kisses as he did so before connecting his lips to hers.

Her pulled his tuxedo jacket off him. Snapping the bowtie off as well. Y/n moaned at the tluchnof his hands on her breast. Massaging them in his hands over the fabric of her strapless bra.

Y/n unbuttoned the spots on his shirt before pulling it off his shoulders and onto the floor. Rafe stop his gripping motions and pulled down his pants and boxers. He sat her up on the counter. Her bare ass connecting to the coldness of the marble designed setting.

Rafe rubbed his tip against her fold once or twice before pushing himself into her. Not giving a warning, but Y/n loved the suddeness. Y/n let a moan into his next as he began thrusting his hips. The girl gripping her black painted nails into his back.

Rafe's eyes rolled to the back of his head. Enjoying the feelings of Y/n's cunt wrapped around him.

"You like that?"

"Yes, god yes."

Y/n sat up, wrapping her arms around his neck. Each moan and huff she exposed in his earn make his whole body shiver. Rafe let out a grunt before answering. She clenched her walls around his dick. The dirty blonde groaned slamming into her body. "Do it again."

She did so. Clenching around around the boy as he slammed into her again. This time, hitting the spot that made her whole body go insane. "Tell me I'm yours."

"You're mine."

A moan escaped her lips after he said what she had wanted. Her hand smacked down onto the edge of the sinks counter. Grilling onto it for dear life. "Tell me it again."

The feeling of her finishing was fastly approaching. As well as for Rafe. The moans she let out made his go over the edge as he fucked her hard. "Tell me, Rafe."

"You're fucking mine, ah-"

Each of them let out a loud moan as they finished. Covering each others mouths. There shouldn't be anyone upstairs but for precautions they covered either way.

Rafe's head fell forward onto her chest. Taking large breaths as y/n did too. "Shit, y/n."

The Cameron pulled out of her. Helping her get redressed and cleaned just after he did himself.

"You're still on the pill right?" He asked as he zipped his pants.

"Yeah. It's fine," she smiled up at his 6'4 figure. Rafe reached down to kiss her passionately.

"I love you, Y/n."

"I love you, too."

312 notes · View notes

i-cant-sing · 3 years

Note

I wonder what would happen if Y/N had a really bad day and just decided to pick a sibling from the Yan!Todoroki clan like a cat would pick its person and just?? Sit in their lap?? They'd say 'I had a terrible day, no torture today please' before taking their well-deserved nap lookin' all cute and peaceful. Then the sibling would be so proud and confused at the same time but really really happy like 'omg for real? Me? What's happening?? 🥺'. Bonus points if it's Dabi just having the widest grin on his face while staring straight at the rest of the fam seething with jealousy.

I saw your works btw and been inhalin em all cause they're all so good *chef's kiss*

-Vibin' anon

Yandere Dabi comforting sister reader

This is so cute omg. Thank u Vibin anon!

Check out my MASTERLIST for more!

Yandere Dabi:

Shotou had come to pick you up from school today. Even though he had a busy schedule himself, he still made time for you, just like the rest if your family.

"How was school?" He asked.

"Fine."

"Just fine? Wasn't your result supposed to come today?"

You nodded. "It did. I passed."

Shotoy smiled. "Thats great. Did you get your report card?"

You knew he was going to ask for it. You also knew that he already knew what grades you got.

You nodded and handed him the report card from your bag.

Shotou's face lit up when he saw your grades.

"You're first again. I'm so proud of you." He patted your head.

You smiled. "Thanks."

By the time you guys reached home, you already knew that your entire family was home. They always were when your result came. You knew the principal had already informed Enji of your grades, she always does.

When you entered the house, your family yelled "surprise!" You feigned shock as they hugged you and congratulated you on your achievement.

Rei had prepared a little feast for you, everything was made from scratch. Enji was beaming with joy, he was so proud of his little girl. Rei had made your favourite cake, kissing your cheek as you cut it. Enji had gotten you beautiful diamond necklace. Natsuo, Shotou and Fuyumi had gotten you some gifts as well, stuff you had vaguely mentioned about. Dabi wasn't home, but you didn't mind his absence.

Your family had planned to spend the night on the couch cuddling and doing a movie marathon, but when you asked them to excuse you for the night because you were feeling tired, they became a but worried. You reassured them that you just had a long day at school as well, and now that you were stuffed with Rei's delicious food, sleep was inevitable. They nodded, a bit sad that you wouldn't be joining, but understanding nonetheless.

You went up the stairs to your room, and as soon as you closed the door, the smile you had been displaying all night was wiped off.

You sat on your bed and recalled the events of the day. Tears pricked your eyes, but you kept yourself quiet. They're not worthy crying over, you reminded yourself. Still, you couldn't help but crumple up your report card and throw it in the dustbin.

Silent tears fell from your eyes, no longer being able to hold them in. God, its infuriating.

Suddenly, you heard someone knock on your bedroom door. You looked at the clock. 12 am.

Its Dabi.

You couldn't deal with him tonight. You remained silent, hoping he'd leave you alone.

But of course not.

You quickly turned away from the door as soon as you heard it open. Wiping your tears quickly, you heard Dabi come in.

"You brat. Why didn't you answer when I knocked?" He asked, pushing the door close with his foot.

"Leave me alone, Dabi." You were trying hard to stabilise your voice.

"Huh?! Is that anyway to talk to your favourite brother?" Dabi mocked as he pulled at your ponytail. You yelped before turning around to push him away.

Dabi was about to laugh at you when he suddenly noticed the your face. Your eyes were full of tears, lashes heavy with them. Your face was flush, your nostrils flared, your lips in a pulled in a tight scowl. Had you been crying? Or did he make you cry?

"Hey, I'm sorry-"

"Just leave me alone." You said as you angrily wiped the tears from your face.

Dabi was shocked to see you like this. He had never seen you cry, not even when he took his teasing a little too far. So, to see you react like this, it worried him a bit.

"Have you been crying? What's the matter? Did you fail or something?" His voice actually held some concern.

You shook your head, pulling your ponytail loose. "Its nothing. Just leave."

Dabi could see the pain in your eyes. What happened? He plopped down on your bed next to you. "Come on. Tell me." He poked your shoulder. "You know I won't leave until you tell me."

"Its nothing, really." You sniffled, avoiding his gaze.

"Did Enji say something?" Dabi asked, his voice taking a dangerous tone. "Look at me. Did he do something?" He's going to kill that bastard if he-

"What? No. God, just go."

Dabi let out a huff. He'll have to use another strategy. "Fine. Don't tell me. I'll just tell Shotou you have been crying, and then you can answer to him."

Shotou? God, he would just overthink everything and do something stupid.

You caught his wrist just as he was about to leave. "Do you have to be such a jerk every single day?" You glared daggers at him.

Dabi smirked before pulling his wrist away and plopping on the bed next to you. "Yes. Big brother privileges." He poked your cheek. "Now spill."

You looked at him, hoping he'd just get blasted magically. Idiot.

You inhaled deeply before closing your eyes. "Its stupid, really." Dabi stared at you, signalling for you to continue. "Something... happened at school." You paused. "Just a couple of assholes."

Dabi was attentive now. "Go on."

You looked down at your lap, playing with your fingers. "Some kids in my class... they said mean things about me."

"Bullying?" Dabi quirked an eyebrow.

You shook your head. "I- I don't think so. They just said that I only get the highest grade in class because of my dad. Like Enji bribes the school into giving me good marks." You sniffled. "They undermine me. They say I'm not good enough to be in their school, and that the only reason I got in was because of my surname."

Tears dripped down your face slowly, almost as if they were ashamed to fall.

You wiped them away harshly. "And it doesn't matter what I say. I've tried to befriend them, I've tried to get along with them, but they still ridicule me. Its frustrating. They... they don't understand that my only option is to be the best." You whispered the last part, but Dabi heard you loud and clear.

He sat up and gently gripped your chin, turning your face towards him as he narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean 'its your only option'?"

You rolled your eyes. "You know what I mean. I know that no one in the family cares if I get the highest marks or not but...I still have to live up to the family name. What will people say if the number 1 hero's kid is both quirkless and dumb?" Your lips wobbled.

Oh. Ohhhh.

You don't want to let down the Todoroki name; you don't want to let down Enji.

He already knew it was that shithead's fault.

Dabi sighed before pulling you close to him. Placing an arm around your shoulders while his other hand wiped your tears away.

Wanting to prove your worth, that you're a valuable asset to the family. Dabi never thought he'd see himself in you, or his younger self really.

"You're an idiot." Dabi began, carding his fingers through your hair. "You don't have to be the best. You're not expected to. You know, the family knows, hell even I know how hard you worked to get in that school. I've seen how you'd do all nighters, how many times you've turned down going out so that you could do well in your exams. But you don't have to do that." He tilted your chin up, staring into your glossy eyes. "We don't care what the public thinks of us. We won't care if you fail. We don't care you're quirkless. You're not expected to be anything but a good girl." He squished your cheeks together, making you look like a fish. "You just need to be safe. Do you understand?"

You sniffled as you nodded. "Yes. Thank you."

Dabi smiled. "Why didn't you tell anyone before?" You shrugged in response. "You know what would've happened if I said anything. They're already hesitant to let me go to school, this would just give them another reason to homeschool me. Besides, I didn't let their words get to me before, so it really wasn't a big deal." Before? You were about to continue but then kept your mouth shut. But Dabi saw that. He pulled you away from him, his eyes turning sharp as he raised his eyebrows. "But something else happened today as well?"

You averted his scrutinising gaze, keeping your lips sealed as you shook your head no. "Do not lie to me. Or I'll tell Shotou and Enji and then they can handle-"

Your eyes widened. "Do you ever stop making threats?" Rolling your eyes, you told him what happened. "It wasn't anything serious. One of those jerks... thought it'd be funny to try and kiss me. When he tried to force me, I slapped him. Really hard. My handprint still on his face." You smiled at that. "He said the only reason he wasn't using his quirk on me was because I was Todorokis charity case. Then he said that I should be grateful that he was going to kiss me, especially since no one cares about a quirkless, frigid bitch like me." You let out a humourless laugh, but Dabi could see the pain in your eyes. You gave a small smile. "Dont worry. I already know what they said isn't true."

Thats it.

Dabi was already planning murder. He's going to make those little shits pay for what they did to you. The nerve to not only bully you, but make you cry, and then touch you? Dabi is gonna make sure they get tortured in every way possible before he incinerates them-

"Dabi?"

Your soft voice pulled him out of his violent thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"Can you... stay the night?"

He looked at your tear stricken face, your eyes were still laden with tear drops, your nose red from all the sniffling.

How could he say no to you? You looked ugly.

"Its okay. You don't have to-" you were cut off by a pillow hitting your face.

"Move over, brat." He climbed in the bed with you, covering you both with the blanket. "And don't put your cold feet on mine." You smiled cheekily at that.

"Don't hog the blanket- why do you need it anyway?"you yanked the blanket.

Dabi pushed another pillow on your face, laughing as you punched his shoulder. "You're insufferable."you mumbled.

It took a while to get comfortable on your single bed, but it ended up with your head on his chest, while Dabi propped himself against the headboard.

"Thank you." You whispered.

Dabi hummed. "Dont think I don't know why you're doing this."

You smiled softly. He caught on to why you were keeping him home that night; you knew he would do something terrible to those guys. "Promise me you won't hurt them?"

Dabi remained silent. You pulled your head away to look up at him. "Dabi. Promise."

When he didn't reply, tears started forming your eyes. He sighed, before shoving your face back into his chest. "Fine, crybaby. I won't hurt them. Promise." You're such a brat, stopping him from doing his big brother duties.

You went back to snuggling him, not taking long for you to finally go to sleep. Once Dabi made sure you were asleep, he pulled out his phone and texted Toga.

"Need a favour. Up 4 stabbing?"

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hotdamnhunnam · 3 years

Note

🎰🔪🧨 with Charlie himself. 🤞🏻

Thanks for your request for my Emoji Fic Fest! 💗

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Slut Machine

Pairing: Charlie Hunnam x F!Reader Warnings: smut, swearing, Vegas shenanigans Word Count: ~1.5k Emoji Prompt: 🎰🔪🧨 (key words are in bold)

“Morning, sleepyhead.”

… Whose voice is that? Your senses are too hazy yet to process who it was or what he said. You blink your bleary eyes and wake up in an… unfamiliar bed. The sheets are a ridiculous resplendent red—must be a love motel or some shit—there’s a story as to how you ended up here but you find you can’t remember any of it. Sleep was so deep that you feel as if you’re waking from the dead.

When your eyes finally flutter open everything comes flooding back. You’re here in bed with Charlie Motherfucking Hunnam and the sight of his blue gaze and bright white grin gives you a goddamn heart attack.

You cover your face with your hands and groan out loud at just how mortified you are. Recalling how you’d made a clown out of yourself last night when you bumped into this million-dollar movie star. Literally bumped into him—till yesterday you never even knew him—you had just been crushing hard on him for years but he was always a completely unattainable celebrity. A girls’ trip brought you to Sin City; you and your besties were hopping casually from bar to bar, when you had stumbled clumsily straight into Charlie as he stepped out of his car.

You’d simply scurried off in that instant ‘cause he was too damn beautiful in person and your ass was terrified. But then bumped into him again soon after you both got inside. This time you had a full martini glass in hand and spilled its contents all across his shirt and thought you ought to help the man get dried. Decided then you really shouldn’t try to run away and hide.

You’d grabbed a bunch of napkins, dabbing at his chest and abs through the damp fabric as you nervously apologized for what happened. Your spastic wiping motions all across his chiseled muscles weren’t exactly very helpful with the spilled drink situation, as your brain cells were all absent in the face of heaven’s most stunning creation. Charlie said some shit about how bumping into you a second time wasn’t an accident. You were too hypnotized with lust to understand just what he meant.

He joked that you could make it up to him by winning him a jackpot at the slot machines. You told him shyly that the whole gambling thing isn’t quite your scene. Although he didn’t want to pressure you he asked you to indulge him in a night of fun—all kinds of shit you’d never done—let him take you out around Vegas to the wildest places you had never been.

It didn’t make sense that you felt so safe with him but hell you did. You were still sober by the time Charlie was coming onto you and all your girlfriends chanted do it do it do it! And the craziest night of your life began before you even knew it. Took you to his favorite high-stakes casino—then to seats in the front row at a big AEW Dynamite show—and then to some intense axe-throwing place that also offered knives and ninja stars and other shit to throw.

The best part of the night though… was of course when Charlie claimed you as his dirty little ho. The memory of it is vivid as you look up at him now and find that both of you are still stuck in the most mind-blowing afterglow.

***************

“No way that was your first fucking time throwing knives?!” Charlie shakes his blonde head in defeat as he walks you back out to the sweet car he drives. “Bitch I swear you’ve been doing this shit your whole life.”

You slide into the passenger seat while erupting in laughter. He’s so fucking butthurt that your aim was better than his because he’s a competitive smug little bastard. “Well I am an assassin specifically hired to take out insanely attractive actors… but I can assure you that wasn’t a factor.”

He closes the driver’s side door, turns the keys and the engine ignites in a smooth thrumming roar. “And by ‘take out’ you mean…?”

“It’s cute of you to ask but dinner and a movie isn’t really the assassin scene.”

He chuckles playfully as he speeds down the street, the night alive with white hot heat, the lights of Vegas bright as ever as the night deepens. “You gonna kill me in my sleep, then?”

“That’d be making it too easy.”

“Babe, don’t tease me. We both know you make it hard.”

Okay so he just pulled that card.

Fight off the burning urge to stare down at his crotch—no doubt the car would crash then if you saw what you’re imagining and know you’d be unable to resist the urge to touch…

You’ve never wanted anyone or anything in all your life so fucking much.

The sudden tension in the air leads him to smooth back his slicked hair, facing the road with a restrained stare. He’s been picking up on signals all night long but doesn’t dare to just assume you want to go there. Tries to come off calm and cool although there’s nothing he wants more. “So, uh—should I just drive you back to your hotel or…?”

The voice that comes out of your mouth is one you barely even recognize. It takes both you and Charlie by surprise, the way your inner slut replies: “That’d be a fucking bore. You know I’d much rather you take me back to yours… so you can fuck me like a filthy little whore.”

***************

The swanky penthouse suite in the five-star hotel where Charlie came to stay… it’s a ten-minute drive away.

That’s way too far needless to say.

He needs you right this second, after what you’d gone and said—although the backseat of his car is a fine spot for a good wrecking, there are fifty shades of shit he’d rather do with you spread in the comfort of a big sumptuous bed.

Thankfully there is an extremely tacky-looking love motel just down the road. And it’s the perfect place for you two to check in and let your passions for each other just explode.

It turns out this particular motel has a requirement for guests to stay the night that just might pose a bit of trouble: lovebirds have to pass through the adjoining chapel first and be a lawfully wedded couple.

So you stand uncomfortably at the reception desk and bite your tongue. Happen to know that Charlie tied the knot in Vegas once when he was young; you’ve heard about it in some interviews. You’re sure that he’d have no desire to repeat that same mistake tonight with you.

But this has been a night of wild crazy shit and he’s on fire to continue.

Mostly it’s just that he really needs his dick in you… but there’s a spark that he can feel might someday blossom into something more and he just hopes that you can feel it too.

***************

Of course you do. The ceremony is a joke but you’re both giddy as if it’s real by the time you’ve seen it through. There’s just no hope of sanity and self-control between you two.

You’re in a fluffy white confection of a wedding gown that this establishment provided for the night. You look like a big puff of cotton fucking candy and he wants to take a bite. So much about this night seems wrong, but when the heat between the racing of your heartbeats is so strong, it can’t feel anything but right.

Once you’re at last inside your room he throws you down onto the bed and dives headfirst into your gown, and goes to town, taking you high until you die as he goes down.

The dress is so damn big, that you can’t see his flawless face, let alone his glorious dick, and that’s a royal fucking waste. You need to see and touch and taste.

He knows exactly what you need and ravenously rips the poufy fabric off of you. His pearly smile and the bristles of his beard are gleaming with your pussy juices as he climbs on top of you. You long to tell him just how bad you want to blow him—want to tell him that you love him even though you barely know him—it would be fucking insane to say I love you, but of course you can still show him.

Yet he wants to consummate this marriage first, before he lets you satisfy your thirst. You’ll have a lifetime’s worth of days and nights to suck on his big dick if you decide to stay with him and make him yours.

That’s everything you want of course.

This whirlwind of a night that started with a stupid joke about hitting the jackpot at the slot machines… turned into you being his motherfucking wife, after the wildest and best night of your motherfucking life. And now he’s here on top of you about to fuck you and it’s totally outrageously obscene.

You wouldn’t have it any other way ‘cause you know you were put on earth to serve as Charlie Hunnam’s dirty little slut machine.

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