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#i kinda wanna take a walk in the woods sometime maybe
yardsards · 2 years
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i am 99% happy i moved out of that rotting dilapidated hellhole i grew up in but rn i kinda miss being able to look at spiders whenever i wanted
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sea-of-dust · 2 months
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Phantom theif boys x GN! Reader
Dating headcannons!
N: Adding comfort headcannons to knock two asks in one stone, they got changed to just comforting headcannons mostly. Ur not escaping pastel*pallette with this.
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He's ready to fully wake up as soon as he hears your voice downstairs or just your footsteps. Morgana is not a fan of suddenly feeling his leg pulled out of bed.
Super ready to tease you. The guys smiling hard before he responds with something stupid. "I dare you" trying to hold off his chucking, he places his hand ontop of yours and spins you, stopping when you face him. "Are you a cheeseburger?" "no"
Let's you brush his hair, in fact you should. Curls are hard, ya know. His wrist can use a break, plus you're the one brushing it he sees it as a win. Ignoring the times you decided to give him pigtails
He can be super romantic at times, especially the most random, "I'm sorry I took so long, your beauty distracted me" he smirked twiddling a bit of his hair, you sigh, after a pause beginning to chuckle "I don't like you" "you love me" kissing your cheek he goes behind the counter "anything you wanna eat?"
He's always gonna be there to comfort you. Holding you close as you cry into his chest over something that had been bothering you, hearing you out while he cooks or staying by your side while you rant. "And then she was like," Oh well you need to go to extra help TO HELL WITH THAT!" You rub your temple "sorry she's just been getting on my nerves" "have you tried dropping or switching classes?" "She would reject the request everytime" you'd wonder why she suddenly accepted the following day. Maybe she finally thought you were just bad at chemistry
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Will tell you he's a phantom theif trying to rizz you up. "So like we use these things called personas to fight these shadows" "woah, that's cool, Ryuji." You didn't believe him, but you let him cook, he's trying his best
Embodiment of the YIPPE sound. He loves seeing you. Could be walking to class, and he'd stop midway. "Yo!" "Hey Ryuji" great now he's gonna repeat that 3 more times a day, won't even start a conversation, sometimes, just likes hearing you say hi to him
He's super cuddly when sleepy. "Where are you going" "I told you I'm going home" "nooo" he wraps his arms around your waist "you aren't allowed to leave" trying to slip out he tightens his grip. You had to call your parents to tell them you had no choice but to stay longer
He'd get so excited when anything sport related comes along. "I wanna watch the track team compete this weekend. You should come" "do you need me to bring snacks?" "You bring them every time, though! I'll bring them this time" He'd get super hyped up about someone from the school taking the lead he almost fell off the bleachers at times.
He would buy you snacks, and you two would talk about it on a bench. "He's so annoyingggg" "I know, right!" "Like he can't shut up everything's quiet and this mf 'I HAVE A BUISNESS' shut up" "like at the end of the day he's still an incel" "EXACTLY" you two would end up ranting with eatchother so much you end up calming eatchother down, this would also translate into you just being too sad to even make funny comments. "He's just so draining, kinda makes me wish someone just told him to be quiet" "for real I almost cried at his voice" "it's too squeaky right" "totally" laying your head on his lap you look up at him just thinking. "You're staring into my soul here." he strokes your hair with a nervous expression "good" In the end, he still comforts you the same way
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"Oh, it's you" turned to "it's you.." REAL quick, as soon as you started dating, he got shy
He's gonna ask you to help him with art. "Y/n do you mind posing?" "With what?" "These live lobsters I found" ".... no thank you" "but!" "I'm gonna buy you those little wooden dolls just for that" "you're better than any piece of wood!" It turns more into a praise sesson he forgets about the lobsters he's basically keeping as pets at this point
You tried to teach him how to cook, or atlesst follow the recipe. "OK so we have the custard" you grab his hand, holding it up. "Don't use that we need it for later." "My Appologies" "it's alright it's your first time making this" He's fine the first time but gets way better with practice. He'd make you jealous with how nice he'd make his food look
Tried pick up lines they were good, but the execution could use work. "Y/n! Do you have a map? " "For what?" He pauses, looking down as if thinking for the next line "because i can't help but get lost in your eyes" you smirk, watching him get more bashful than you from his own line. "Are you a painting?" You cup his face making him look at you "because I can't take my eyes off you"
He isn't very good in this field...but he has spirit! You'd sigh while watching him paint after a few eye rolls, vacant stares,leaning on him. He's gonna sense it even if you don't do all that. "Is there something on your mind?" You look down to his paints before answering "a friend of mine moved away, and I found out recently she used to steal stuff from others" crossing your arms you continue "I kinda get why some of my stuff went missing now but just to think" "that does seem rather unfortunate" "she's lucky the stuff she took was all under 10 bucks or I would have asked the phantom theives to do something" he pauses his brush for a secound before continuing on "via the website?" "Yea! They'll probably handle her if it genuinely gets outta hand" he smiles as he puts down his paint and brush. "How about we go for a walk for you to let out some steam?" "sounds great"
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"I'm alone. Would you like to join me?" "Do you realize how that sounds?" "Do you realize how dirty your mind is?"
He'll be resistant to cuddling at first but then slowly realize he likes it. Won't ask for it tho but he will be a little peeved when they aren't given. Subconsciously learn the way he stares at your arms, how he grips his own, and the way he tries to get a bit closer to you, you've learned the secrets to a touch starved akechi
Would be a bit annoyed when you bring up another dude. "And then Ryuji was shaking the vending machine and the guard thought we were trying to steal snacks" "I see" "I ended up getting em though" "mhm" "you're so aggressively disinterested" "yes I am" You pause before letting the smirk take over your face "so then akechi rubbed my face and asked for a kiss" "I should" he stops typing to press his lips softly on your cheek.
He'd take you everywhere with him. Not a choice, it's only when he's at his job that he's away from you, everywhere else? Same class right next to you. Eating lunch with you, would ask you to play darts with him after school. He'd wonder why you'd look so tired when you two finally got home after school, atleast he helps with homework.
"Akechi" you move hair from his face. "What is it?" You continue touching his face as he watches as your hands move around his face. "Is there something on your mind" "is it that obvious" you pull your hand away, but he takes his into yours. There's a short pause before you decide to speak again. "A person close to me stopped coming to school after an argument we had. I'm pretty worried" "you didn't try contacting them?" "I have, but I think they'll just get more annoyed" you sigh "I just don't know what to do" "let them have their momment they'll contact you when they feel like it, in the meantime" he covers you in the blanket he shared with you momments ago "you could stay here until it leaves your mind"
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"So what is skibbity toilet?" "Zen no"
He'd always order for you at places, unless you changed your order he'd get you everytime. "You gotta stop doing that" "Why you jealous I know you better than you know yourself?" "Yes"
He tries to ask you for advice on Akane. "She got upset she couldn't play and eat" "did you try making it a tea party" he scoffs, giggling a bit at the suggestion. "I'm serious. Do you have any tiny tea cups?"
He's definitely touch starved when he gets home. Barely awake, he'd cling onto you, mumbling into your ear. He's fallen asleep for a few seconds on your shoulder. "Let's get you to bed, Zen." "it's comfortable here though." "it'll be more comfortable in bed." "ugghhhhh"
He's gentle when it comes to you, especially when you get home more upset than usual. "So how was work" in a slightly annoyed tone you respond "draining they tried to give me unpaid overtime again" you sigh "hmm" without much words he lays down with you hugging you "do you want anything?" "Sleep" he smiles fondly "this house will be so quiet it's like it was haunted" The next day, do expect most of your chores to be done already, as well as breakfast. It was made with love, not with skill
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blue-sadie · 10 months
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hey can i request a tsu’tey fic? only if you have the time and only if you wanna write it tho
tsu’tey is female reader’s teacher in hunting/archery. after months yn doesn’t seem to make any progress but tsu’tey is patient and keeps giving her tips and everything. but it turns out that yn actually learnt a lot but gets shaky and nervous around him because she’s kinda into him but he doesn’t know that. one day he catches her hunting perfectly and gets mad thinking that she knew how to do it all along and basically just played him and wasted his time. yeah and then he finds out the truth and all is good.
sorry if it’s too specific
and thank you in advance 🩵
I read something exactly like this but with neteyam 🤭
At Fault
Tsutey x Na'vi Reader
Summary: Tsu'tey had distracted you, he made you lost for words but maybe that's a good thing
Warning: none
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Yn/3rd person pov
I let out a small breath before releasing the arrow and watching as it shoots through the air landing straight on the target "you've gotten better" neytiri murmured leaning up against a tree.
I looked at her briefly before grabbing another arrow "you may say that but I wish I could do this infront of tsutey" I said aiming it again "every time I try I fail" I released the arrow and smiled as it landed right next to the first one.
"Have you tried talking to him" she asked kicking off the tree and taking the bow to practice and I stood beside her "no" I admitted blushing a little bit.
"When I do I can't even form words or sometimes I get so distracted by him I can't" I huffed out watching as she did the same as me.
"Well you'll have to eventually" she smiled and handed the bow back to me "now if you'll excuse me I have to find jake" she said and slowly wondered into the woods "sounds like love" I called out and got no response.
"Differently love" I smiled I got into stance and picked up another arrow but I could feel somethings wrong my ear flickered at a sound and I quickly moved shooting the arrow towards the noise.
My heart clenched as I saw a frustrated tsutey standing near a tree and an arrow two inches from his face "t-tsutey w-what are you doing here" I stuttered dropping my bow nervously.
He growled coming closer to me with big steps "you can shot" he huffed pointing towards the targets "i-uh" I didn't know what to say "you acted dumb for what" he hissed my breathing hitched I've never seen him like this.
He took another step towards and I took one back scared of what he could do to me I know what he's capable of I've seen him "why did you waste my time" he growled his eyes flaring with anger "i-i don't-" he growled again making me shut up.
"Don't talk to me again, you've wasted enough of my time" he huffed and turned to walk away but as he reached the edge of the training ground I blurted it out.
"Its your fault" I yelled out and gasped as the words left my lips I watched wided eyed as he stopped in his tracks and only turning his head to look at me "what" he muttered.
I quickly cleared my throat and began to play with my fingers nervously "it's your fault tsutey, you make me nervous" I paused and watched as he turned to me his expression changing from anger to curiosity.
"You distract me, you make me forget how to speak" I carried on getting more nervous as he slowly starts to approach me again "I lose my balance everytime your around, it's your fault that I'm so bad" I stated moving my eyes to everywhere but him.
He stopped a few inches away from me and I flinched as he raised his hand to my cheek slowly guiding me to look at me, he leaned down and gently pecked my lips before chuckling.
"I guess I'm at fault"
Tag.List
@erenjaegerwifee @greekgods15 @sweetirilly @neteyamyawne
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star-wrote · 1 month
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hello❤️i just saw your blog! im irish so i was wondering can you do whatever fic you write with an irish reader? i think the accent and the slang difference would be fun to read! you don’t have to specify the fic on r being irish just a fic wheres r is irish hope i could explain that!😅
Leannán
ao3 link
Characters: Farm Era Daryl Dixon x Irish!Reader
A/N: so excited for this request !! thank you love! i have irish heritage so this was so fun to write(and also incredibly self-indulgent). i decided on daryl since it would be the most difference in accents:) also feel like i totally didn’t do this justice, it feels kinda short and rushed…but i had fun so slay!!
Warnings: fluff, love confession, bad accent writing, cursing, reader is sort-of mentioned to have green eyes(very self indulgent), reader knows irish gaelic (yes i know the language is practically dead, it’s just so pretty)
Word Count: 605
not my character | images from pinterest
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Making fun of your accent is one of Daryl’s favorite activities.
You know he likes to see your face get all red, cartoon steam coming out of your ears. It reminds you of the little boys on the playground who would push you to the dirt as a way of flirting.
Not that he would ever admit that it was flirting.
Luckily, you could take the teasing… and dish it right back.
“You sure are one ta talk; what with your grunts and yee haws.” You shove his shoulder as he eats his breakfast with you by the fire.
“Ain’t say yee haw,” he pouts, “and ya jus’ say weird words fer things. Like tha’ one fer kiss.”
You smirk at him. “What, póg? Why, ya want one?”
“Stop.” He rolls his eyes.
That’s how your usual conversations with the arm-swinging grump went.
Days on the Greene farm were usually quite relaxed after the chores for the day got done. You’ve found yourself drawn to Daryl more and more after every conversation, his soft spot for you becoming apparent to everyone. Maybe it’s because you both felt like outsiders in the group. In a weird way, you felt like he understood you… even if he quite literally couldn’t sometimes.
“Shite.” You curse under your breath. Lugging water to the house from the well was tough work, but work you’d rather be doing compared to washing clothes or making food. Curse you and your feminist ambition.
“Need some help, Irish?”
You blush at the nickname that has become common from the mouth of Daryl Dixon. “I do, please.” You sigh as you hand a bucket of water to him. “Why are you back so early? The sun’s only mid-sky.”
“Was hopin’ you’d wanna go on a hunt with me. Could use the help.” He grabs the other bucket from your hand as well, carrying them both with no difficulty.
“I doubt that you, mister hunter man, king of the wild, actually need help with hunting. But, I’ll gladly join.” You smile while stretching out your sore back.
He finishes your chore for you, Lori tossing a “thanks” over her shoulder on your way out of the farmhouse.
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Hunting with Daryl feels like one of the most peaceful things in the world, obviously ignoring the occasional walker.
You trail quietly behind him, soaking up the nature around you while he does all of the work.
However, you know he wouldn’t have it any other way. He just likes your company.
“Ya know… yer eyes remind me of the woods. My favorite place.”
You’re sure your eyebrows raise to your hairline after hearing his statement. You’ve never heard him speak so directly before.
He stops abruptly, causing you to walk into his back.
When he turns around, you can see the blush that reaches his ears. He was nervous.
“Daryl, what are you trying to tell me?”
He kicks at a clump of grass. “Nevermind.”
“Don’t, it’s okay, you can tell us.”
He smiles a little at you using “us” instead of “me.”
“I think I like ya, Irish. Nah, I know I do.”
“I like you too ya eejit.” You punch his shoulder.
It’s his turn for his eyebrows to raise to his hairline. “Really? Ya don’t have to jus’ say that.”
Instead of responding with words that you know would fall short in reassuring him, you pulled him into a hug.
“Leannán.” You whisper into his chest.
“What does tha’ one mean?”
“Darling.” You answer while smiling up at him.
He tucks your hair behind your ear and gently kisses your lips.
“I like tha’ one.”
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self-written-god · 8 months
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T | 1625 | m/m Steddie human/wingfolk | fantasy | winged!Eddie, wing grooming
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The business was slow at first, but as the word spread, more clients were coming, including those that paid a lot for full treatment, from cleaning to waxing, and sometimes even dyeing. In a year, the salon became the best known in the region, with some arguing it was the best one. Maybe it wasn’t the biggest achievement considering the services provided were still hard to come by, but it was an achievement nevertheless.
Robin saw wingfolks from many species and all walks of life, but the man that walked through the door one Thursday afternoon was a sight to behold.
He was dressed in all black, the alternative type that didn’t mind cutting a hole through a shirt to accommodate his wings. The clothing matched his feathers, dark like coal and opalescent when the sun hit them just right. Black wings were rare in general, and their owners also kept to their circles. Steve could count on the fingers of one hand the times he worked on them in the past year of running his business.
“Welcome to Robin’s grooming service, how can I help you today?”
Instead of a greeting, the man looked around, studying the salon walls and the man who greeted him.
“I’ve heard you take in all the customers?”
Steve straightened his spine. It was a question he’s heard before, in many intonations.
“Yes, we care about the wings, not who they belong to or what color they are.”
He’s heard about salons that refused to treat black wings, running on a prejudice that black wings belonged to demons or, as some called them, corrupted angels. Thus why they kept to themselves.
The man relaxed a bit, finally approaching the counter. 
“Are you free today?” he asked, fingers drumming nervously on the wood.
“Yeah, I have noone scheduled. What would you like to get done?” he smiled, hoping to come off as reassuring as possible. His client didn’t look very convinced though. He fidgeted with the feathers of his right wing, curled slightly towards himself.
“Just the basics. I don’t have much money and,” he hesitated before admitting. “I’ve never been to a groomer before, usually my uncle did it, but his arthritis got worse, and, you know…” he shrugged sheepishly, realizing he's sharing more than necessary. “Long story short my band leaves for our first tour this weekend and I wanna look good on stage.” He smiled, finally, and Steve could read the pride and excitement behind it, despite how small it was. He offered his own, wide grin back.
“Congrats on the tour, man. It sounds like a special occasion.”
“Thanks, it kinda is, isn't it?” The man scratched his cheek, the sheepish grin back.
"My name's Steve, I'll be working on you. What's yours?"
"Eddie."
The man notes the appointment down in his calendar, then closes it.
“Well, let’s get you stage ready then. Would you like some tea? I have a great yasmine blend. Do you prefer to lie down or sit?”
“Sit, I think. Tea would be great.”
“Gotcha. Get comfortable, you can change the music, adjust the chair however you like. I’ll be with you in a moment.”
The man sauntered to one of two stations in the salon, the one with the chair, tracing the leather before he turned to the radio and a stack of cassettes beside it. The wide selection of genres proved that the owner cared about his clients’ comfort more than imposing his taste on music on everyone. He shuffled through them, finally settling on an Aerosmith tape to pop it in. He settled on the chair, watching the man lineup needed supplies. A steaming mug of fragrant tea was settled down next to him.
“Thank you,” he said, following him with his gaze and then listening intently as he ran him through the process and the tools he’ll be using. First, came the brushing, to get rid of anything his feathers don’t need. It took him a moment to loosen up to the fact that a stranger was touching his wings, but when they finished the first one, he was relaxed enough to engage in some small talk.
“What’s the name of your band?”
“Corroded Coffin. We play metal, mostly covers, a few originals.”
The man hummed.
“Sounds fitting. Are all your bandmates winged folks?”
Sometimes this line of questioning would rub him the wrong way, but the groomer’s intentions seemed genuine. Besides, he got raving reviews from people Eddie trusted.
“Our drummer is fully human, but other than that, yes. Only mine are black, though.”
“They are beautiful,” the man said, and he blushed under the compliment, glad to be turned away from him. “Pity I don’t get to work on black wings often.”
“Well, if you do a good job today, who knows,” he offered. “Maybe I’ll need some grooming when I come back from the tour. Someone’s gotta brush away the leftover coke.”
Steve snorted.
“Oh, it’s this kind of tour? Sex, drugs and rock’n’roll? I’m fine with coke, but cleaning up sperm will cost you extra.”
Eddie choked on his spit, head snapping back to see the man’s cocky smirk. He could feel his cheeks heat up, imagining scenarios in which cum could get up there.
“Thanks, I think I'll manage,” he choked out, turning back away.
“I mean, it takes two, at least, and a good partner should help with it.”
“I guess so,” he mused, red faced against his arms, and the topic simmered out. 
“Were you in a forest recently?” the groomer asked instead.
“Uh, yeah, why? Oh no, is there a tick?!”
“No, no, don’t worry,” the man chuckled. “Just some pine needles. And twigs. Found a small pinecone too,” he said, showing him the findings in his palm.
If he gets any redder he might faint.
“Uh, that’s not cool, I’m usually more careful, I swear I’m not a slob-”
Steve stopped him, patting the bare skin between his wings soothingly.
“My friend has wings too, I know how easy it is to get stuff stuck in them after just a short walk through the woods. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about."
Eddie grumbled into his arms, melting further into them as if he wanted to disappear. The rest of the brushing was uneventful, with Steve mostly talking about his winged friend. Her name was Robin, the namesake of the salon, and she was a co-owner of the place. It seemed like they were close, but not once did Eddie get the idea the feelings between them were romantic. 
“Now I'm gonna clean them for any remaining dirt, then just conditioning and we’ll be done.”
Eddie nodded, watching him swap the supplies for the next task. 
Five minutes in proved him wrong for thinking brushing was his favorite part of grooming. Steve was way more attentive than his uncle, gently rubbing the suds into feathers. Under his touch, and with a faint smell of jasmine, he started dozing off. After the third time he jolted himself awake, Steve gently said:
“It’s okay, you can nap. You wouldn’t be the first one. I’ll wake you up to pick the oil when I’m done.”
Eddie nods once, and settles his head on his arms, letting himself drift off.
He’s woken up by a warm hand soothing the knobs of his spine. He purrs at the touch, still in a sleepy daze, before catching himself. The man chuckles, but doesn’t comment. He offers him a slim brown bottle.
“I have others to choose from, but I think this one would work for you.”
Eddie screws it open and takes a sniff. 
“It smells…” he searches his brain for the right word. “Foresty.”
“Yeah, Do you like it?” The man is grinning again, so Eddie rolls his eyes before admitting that yes, he does. Steve takes the bottle back. “You can go back to sleep, or I can make you some more tea or coffee if you’d rather wake up before leaving.”
As appealing as another nap sounded, Eddie didn’t want to embarrass himself further in front of the man.
“Coffee sounds great.”
“Gotcha. Be right back.”
He returned bearing coffee and immediately went to work. He rubbed the oil on his palms before applying it to the feathers with the same motion he’d been cleaning them with, slow and attentive.
Maybe not going to sleep was a bad choice, but Eddie determinedly sipped on his coffee, just letting himself enjoy the treatment. 
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” the man spoke up, surprising Eddie. He made a hum of encouragement. “For a favor, actually. I’d give you a full treatment for free as payment, of course.”
Eddie turned back to look at him, now curious. The man was focused on his wings.
“Just spill it, man.”
He breathed out, finally looking up to meet his gaze.
“I’d like to add your wings to my portfolio,” he motioned vaguely to the walls of the salon, decorated with photos of wingfolk. The main focus were their wings, some of their faces weren’t even shown, though some had make up and hair done - a secondary specialization for the salon. “Most of those are of my friends, but none of them have black wings. I’d love to have yours displayed.”
Eddie frowned. 
“You want my wings on your wall?”
“Greatly.”
“Wouldn’t that scare off customers?” he reminded. 
The man only huffed.
“Good, I don’t need people like that around me.”
Eddie was stunned into silence. He turned back to settle against the chair, considering the photos on the walls.
“Okay. I’ll contact you after the tour?”
“I’d love that. Thank you,” the man said with a smile in his voice and went back to work.
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munsonhoneybaby · 2 years
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Smoking Buddies | Eddie Munson X F!Reader
Summary: After buying weed from Eddie once, you get hooked on more than just the deals he’s willing to give you. 
Word Count: 5.1k
Warnings: 18+ mdni, drug use (marijuana), smut, outdoor sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, dirty talk, praise kink
A/N: considering this is my first eddie fic and the first thing i’ve written in like six months i’m honestly super disappointed with how this turned out i’m ngl but hopefully i’m able to get other stuff out soon and get back into the groove of writing more frequently
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Trying to get a private moment with Eddie Munson was proving to be a much more difficult task than you had expected. For someone labeled as the school freak you’d think he’d spend more time by himself, yet each time you spotted him in the halls he was talking to one of his friends or being hounded by his mini gaggle of freshmen. After half a day of what felt like mild stalking on your end, you figured it would be better to just catch him in the parking lot after school.
That’s how you ended up standing beside Eddie’s van in the lot of Hawkins High, attempting to ignore the looks you were receiving from your peers. Fiddling with your fingers, you tried to push down the anxiety bubbling in your chest as you waited for him to exit the building. “C’mon, Munson,” You muttered to yourself uncomfortably. “The fuck is taking him so long?”
A few more minutes passed and you were beginning to worry that the school’s club schedule you checked was wrong and he actually had Hellfire tonight. He finally walked through the doors, a friend of his– Gareth, you thought his name was– in tow as Eddie spoke animatedly about something. When he looked in the direction of his van and caught a glimpse of you, his expression shifted in a way you couldn’t quite comprehend before he seemingly bid a quick goodbye. It felt like the pumping of your heart kicked into double-time as he all but made a beeline towards you.
He flashed a hesitant smile as he said your name and leaned against the side of his van. “You know, I’m not sure we’ve ever actually had a one-on-one conversation. To what do I owe the pleasure, m’lady?”
Well, at least you didn’t have to take charge of the situation. “I uh- I was wondering if I could maybe buy from you sometime soon…?”
Eddie chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest, which probably would’ve felt condescending if it weren’t for the good-natured grin lining his lips. “Well, look at you. I always figured you a more academic type. Good girl wants to try something new?”
Heat rushed through your body in embarrassment as a small pout formed on your face. “I smoke,” You mutter defensively, “I just usually do it with other people so I never needed to buy my own. Will you sell to me or not, Munson?”
“Relax, princess,” He cooed teasingly. “I wouldn’t say no to you.” By now, most of the other students had cleared out aside from those who had a club meeting or practice to attend. “You said sometime soon, does that mean you don’t have the money for it on you?”
“No, I-I do.”
He thought it was kinda cute, how nervous you were, though he hoped your nerves were geared more towards buying illegal substances and less towards speaking to the town freak. “Okay, then I can sell to you now if you want.”
“Here?” You asked, raising your eyebrows at him.
“Well, we’d have to step into the van of course, but…” He watched the way you glanced back towards the school building and spun one of the rings on your fingers. “If you wanna go somewhere more private, we totally can.” You gave him a soft nod in response and he returned the gesture. “Alright. I do my deals in the woods pretty often if you wanna go there– I could take you and bring you back to your car after, or you can follow me. Whatever you want.”
Glancing back at where your own car was parked, you tried to think it over quickly. It wasn’t like you to just take off into the woods with a guy you hardly knew, but you didn’t want to use up your gas or draw more attention to yourselves by taking a second car into the woods. And so far? Eddie wasn’t what you had expected. Sure, you knew he wasn’t actually the leader of a satanic cult like some people in this town believed, but you figured he’d be…ruder? A little rougher around the edges? Yet he’d done nothing but try to make sure you were comfortable interacting with him. So, against what you would call your better judgment, you hesitantly said, “I guess I can just um- ride with you.”
With another one of his goofy smiles, he yanked open the passenger side door and made a grand sweeping gesture towards the empty seat. “In that case, m’lady, your chariot awaits.”
You couldn’t help the small giggle you let out as you climbed into the seat and Eddie closed the door beside you, walking around to his side. He even reminded you to put your seatbelt on when he started the van up.
The two of you made polite conversation on the short drive there, the anxious tension slowly easing by the time you got to a clearing in the woods. It was a small open space with a picnic table in the center, which he headed for when you both had gotten out. As he opened up the black tin box that he frequently carried around, you took a seat across from him. “So, I’ll usually do half an ounce for twenty dollars,” He explained. 
“If I gave you extra, could you roll joints for me?” You asked sheepishly, looking up at him from under your lashes as you fiddled with your rings again; they were much simpler than his, daintier and less gaudy, pretty, he thought.
“You don’t have to give me extra for that, princess,” He chuckled. “I don’t mind helpin’ you out.”
“I don’t want to waste your time-” You began, but he held up a hand. 
“I’m not the kind of guy who leaves a lady to roll her own joints,” He smirks, “I’ll take twenty, no more.”
And so, you handed him the twenty dollars and watched as he started rolling a few joints. When the first one was finished you took it from him, asking if he had a lighter and placing the joint between your lips.
He paused, looking at you with a deadpan expression. “Sweetheart, who do you think you’re talking to?” Stuffing a hand in the pocket of his jeans, he pulled out a plain black lighter. He gestured for you to lean a bit closer, holding the flame up and giving you a light.
Eddie continued rolling as you took a hit, handling it much better than he had expected you to. “Hm, guess you have smoked before,” He jested.
“Did you think I was lying?” You asked jokingly, offering the joint to him.
“Maybe you were trying to impress me,” He teased. “You paid for this, y’know. You don’t have to share it with me.”
You shrugged at that before continuing, “If I were trying to impress you, I probably wouldn’t have asked you to roll my joints for me.”
“Damsel in distress play,” He pointed out, eyes narrowed playfully while he took a decently long drag. “Trying to get me to stick around longer and take care of you.”
Leaning forward, you plucked the joint from his fingers for yourself. “That’s not impressing you, that’s trying to get in your pants. But since I was, in fact, telling the truth about smoking both are irrelevant.” 
The joint was passed back and forth between the two of you, Eddie pre-rolling joints for you– although he actually spent more time just smoking and talking to you. By the time he stubbed it out for you, you had moved to sit beside him, giggling out whatever came to mind while you watched him roll. “You don’t have to keep doing that if you don’t wanna, Eddie.” 
“How else are you plannin’ on smoking all this, sweetheart?” He asked with a small chuckle. Being honest with himself, his fingers were starting to cramp up a bit and he typically would charge people if they specifically asked for pre-rolled joints because it didn’t happen often, but he’d decided it would be worth it for you. For some of your time.
When you spoke, your voice was more demure than it had been since you’d taken your first hit of the afternoon. “Maybe- Maybe we could smoke again, a-and you could keep rolling for me? I-If you think that could work…?”
He smiled softly. “Yeah, I’m sure that’d work just fine, princess.”
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The clearing in the woods after school every other Wednesday. He had taken to teasing you by calling it your ‘freak session’. As in:
“Still on for your freak session this week?”
“Sorry, princess, gonna have to reschedule your freak sesh. Something came up with DnD.”
“Excited for today’s session, sweetheart?”
When you had punched him in the arm and whined about it sounding gross he simply said, “I’m the town freak and you meet me at scheduled times to buy drugs and have smoke sessions in the woods. That sounds like a freak sesh to me, babe, nothin’ gross about it. Get your pretty little head outta the gutter.”
You didn’t buy from him every time, of course, most of the time you just smoked and talked and he rolled you joints when you needed them. His personality drew you in; he was just comforting to be around. After only your second time buying from him, he started selling to you for fifteen instead. Soon you were spending hours on end out in the clearing, getting high and digging into any topic of conversation that either of you could think of.
One day Eddie had been lying on the picnic table, you sitting beside him on the bench. There had been a lull in conversation and you spoke up to fill the quiet. “Hey, Eds? Y’know, I’ve always kinda wanted to listen to metal and hard rock and stuff…” His responding chuckle sounded unconvinced. “I have! I’ve just never really known where to start.”
He raised up onto his elbows, looking at you with a shit-eating grin. “Oh, have I got you covered, princess.” He’d grabbed your hand and dragged you back to his van, climbing in through the back and telling you to sit and light a joint while he turned on the radio. You did as you were told, taking a hit as Metallica’s “Ride the Lightning” album began pouring from the speakers. He plopped down beside you with a thud and took the joint from you, “Now sit back and let your mind be blown, babe.” After sitting through the entire album, he asked for your favorite song, to which you responded “For Whom the Bell Tolls”. He gave you another beaming smile, “Atta girl, good answer.”
Eddie took a moment to decide what album to show you next, settling on “Screaming for Vengeance” by Judas Priest. He felt lucky he wasn’t facing you at the moment so you couldn’t see him flush as he said, “You should come to my place sometime, I’ve got a shit ton more music there I’m sure you’d like.”
You were also glad he wasn’t facing you so he couldn’t see the way you bit down on your lip to contain your smile. “Yeah, Eds, sounds cool.”
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During school hours, you guys still had minimal contact. You didn’t happen to be in any of the same classes. If you happened to pass each other in the halls or make eye contact in the cafeteria, you guys would nod politely, but that was about it. Your interactions were so subtle that no one else ever even noticed them. In all honesty, it kinda bummed you out. 
Then you realized that it was probably entirely your fault. You kept to yourself, especially in school, very rarely drawing attention to yourself. Eddie, on the other hand, was accustomed to having eyes on him wherever he went. This, along with the fact that you had insisted on going somewhere completely private when you saw him, probably made him assume you didn’t want people to know you had become friends. You decided it was your job as his friend to make sure he knew that wasn’t the case; you needed him to know that you weren’t ashamed to be close to him.
So that day, when you walked into the cafeteria for lunch, you walked directly past the table of acquaintances from English that you usually sat with and took a seat beside Eddie at Hellfire’s table. The group of boys all stared at you in open-mouthed confusion while Eddie’s lips curled into the biggest grin you’d ever seen, dimples indenting deep into his cheeks.
“Hi, Eds,” You hummed nervously.
“Hiya, princess,” He cooed excitedly. “Sittin’ at the weird kids’ table today?”
“Maybe not just today,” You gave him a shy smile. Suddenly his arm was settling around your shoulders and he was leaning forward to introduce you to his friends, including Jeff, Gareth, and the freshmen who had driven you to meet Eddie in the parking lot on that first fateful day. “It’s great to meet all of you guys, Eddie talks about Hellfire a lot.” They all murmured overlapping responses and when you met Eddie’s eyes looking slightly overwhelmed he laughed and took over the conversation. Briefly looking around the room, you noticed at least a couple of people from almost every table gazing over at you with perplexed expressions. 
Eddie felt your fingers clench around the sleeve of his jacket and he looked at you before following your eyes around the room. He sighed, squeezing your hand and leaning closer to your ear. “Just ignore them, sweetheart. They’re just confused why a sweet thing like you is hanging around a delinquent like me, it doesn’t matter what they think.” He snorted then, nudging your shoulder, “Maybe they’ll think you got stuck tutoring me so I don’t fail senior year a third time.”
Nudging him back, you shrugged. “Who knows, Munson, maybe third time’s the charm.” And as more people began to stare and whisper, you tightened your hands around his and leaned into his side. “Let them talk. They’re all pricks anyway.”
This had coincidentally taken place on a Wednesday, meaning you were still riding the high of the school day’s events as you walked into the clearing that afternoon. You’d actually beat him there today, having gotten out twenty minutes earlier than everyone else after volunteering to help reorganize the library during your last period. 
You laid out on the picnic table, looking up at the clouds to pass time as you waited for Eddie. It wasn’t long before his voice filled the open space. “Early for today’s session, sweetheart,” He teased. “Still riled up from lunch, just couldn’t wait to see me, huh?”
Leaning up on your palms you explained, “Got out early for helping out in the library.”
“Aw, always such a good girl.” He almost missed the way your breath hitched. As he spoke, he set the black box down beside you on the table and took a seat on the bench. “Except for today at lunch, which was a total badass move by the way. The rest of the guys thought it was really cool of you.” He watched you light up a joint and rubbed the back of his neck bashfully, studying the patterns in the wood of the table for a moment before looking up to where you sat. “I’m proud of you, y’know. I know you get nervous in front of people, I’m sure it couldn’t have been easy for you. But you did it.”
“I did it for you,” You admitted hesitantly. You took a couple tokes and then passed it to him before you spoke again. “I didn’t want you to think I was ashamed of you or something. I know we haven’t really talked at all at school, I just didn’t want you feeling like you’re some dirty secret I’m hiding.” 
“Risked public humiliation and becoming a town pariah all cause you were worried about my feelings, princess?” The corners of his lips curled into a small smirk. 
Wanting to face him, you sat up and allowed your legs to dangle over the edge of the table on either side of him. He covered the sharp breath he took in by taking a hit. “‘Course I did, Eds.” You looked down at your hands and Eddie knew you were going to toy with your rings before you even reached for them. Peering at him from under your lashes, you mumbled, “Y’know, you’re basically the most important person in my life now.”
He scoffed playfully, “What? Your drug dealer?” A hand casually found one of your thighs, the other passing the joint back to you. The metal of his rings was cold against your bare skin, his hand lingering respectfully close to your knee.
“Well, yes, but no.” He chuckled. “You’re like…my best friend now, Eddie.”
“‘S that what I am, sweetheart?” He asked, that smirk returning as he looked up at you. “Your bestie? We gonna have sleepovers, and do face masks, and paint each other's nails?”
“That depends, can I braid your hair?” You jeered back. He laughed, his hand rubbing up your thigh before traveling back down. There was a comfortable silence between you for a moment, just relishing each other’s company as you passed the joint back and forth until you put it out. “Did you mean it,” You began diffidently, “...when you said I was badass today?”
His grin would’ve been answer enough, but he squeezed your thigh and gave you a quick wink. “The baddest, babe.”
Maybe it was the weed talking, maybe you were just feeling ballsy from your stunt in the cafeteria, but you were feeling dangerously honest with Eddie this afternoon. “You make me feel like a badass,” You admitted. “I actually kinda liked everyone seeing me…with-with you.” He seemed to sit up straighter where he sat, his hand inching just a fraction higher. “You-You make me feel good about myself. Like I’m worth looking at…”
“Oh, baby,” He sighed. “You’re worth so much more than just looks.” Standing, he left one hand on your thigh and raised the other to cradle your face in his palm. “Jesus H. Christ, I hope I’m not reading this wrong.” When his lips met yours, you froze beneath his touch and he thought for sure he��d blown it. Fuck. 
But then your hands, practically trembling, clutched the sides of his Dio vest and pulled him closer. His fingers pressed more firmly into your thigh, rings biting into your flesh in a way you hoped left bruises. His other hand slid into your hair, drawing a whimper from you that was lost to his mouth. All but gasping for breath, Eddie pulled away just enough to look into your eyes. “Shit, princess,” He chuckled lightly as he brushed a thumb across your cheek. When you nudged your nose softly against his, he couldn’t help but go in for another kiss. 
“Eddie,” You whined against his lips, not quite sure what you were pleading for. 
“What is it, sweetheart?” The hand in your hair guided your head back enough for him to leave open-mouthed kisses along your jaw. “Talk to me.”
“Eds, I need you,” You whisper coyly. “Please?”
He groaned, throwing his head back overdramatically for a moment. “You’re gonna be the death of me, y’know that?” Shrugging off his vest, he had you raise your hips before lying it down on the table beneath you. In response to your questioning glance, he said, “If I’m really about to fuck my gorgeous best friend in the middle of the woods, I’m at least gonna make sure you don’t get splinters from this shitty old table.”
You giggled, hands slipping beneath his leather jacket and urging him to take it off. “Wow, Munson, such a gentleman.”
“Who said chivalry is dead?” He murmured teasingly, mouth trailing sloppily down your neck. “Can’t wait to feel this pussy, baby. Been thinkin’ about it so long.”
Coquettishly, you grasped the chain around his neck which held his guitar pick. “Yeah? How long, Eds?”
“Well, that day we were in my van and you were falling in love with ‘For Whom the Bell Tolls’ by Metallica-” He had begun playfully, but slowly grew more serious. “I was busy fallin’ in love with you, sweetheart.” You looked up at him in surprise, mumbling his name on instinct. Before you could say anything else, that stupid little grin of his came back. “‘Course I’ve definitely been thinking about your pussy longer than that.”
“You sure know how to ruin a moment, huh Munson?”
“Just bein’ honest, babe.” His fingers grasped your jaw and he planted a short kiss on your lips. “I promise, when I get you in an actual bed I’ll be real sweet with you, m’kay? But right now, I just wanna make you feel good. Wanna give you what you need. You gonna let me?” Nodding, you mewled another plea for him and grasped at the hem of his shirt. With a smug laugh, Eddie pulled the offending item over his head, allowing it to join the ever-growing pile of clothing behind you on the table. “Now I think it’s your turn, princess.”
With his help, you wriggled your way out of your shirt. Rough, calloused fingertips brushed beneath the cups of your bra. Dull nails dragged gently down your ribs and stomach, raising goosebumps in their wake. His touch met the waistband of your shorts and he thumbed at the button teasingly. “Eddie, c’mon please,” You whined out pathetically. “Touch me.”
“Oh, I know, sweetheart. You just need it so bad, huh?” Your best friend unbuttoned your shorts and yanked them down then, harsh and sudden, dragging your panties along with them. “Don’t worry, baby, need’a get a taste of this pussy and then I’ll fuck you real good.” He pulled you to the very edge of the table, folded your legs back towards your chest, and began mouthing along the insides of your thighs. When he carefully sank his teeth into the flesh there you let out a sharp cry and felt his lips curl into a smirk against your skin. Your hips bucked as he pulled away momentarily.
The needy, ravenous stare he leveled on your pussy was so intense that you tried to close your legs; of course, they didn’t budge much against the firm pressure of Eddie’s hands. “Don’t try and hide from me, baby. I just wanted to get a good look at this pretty cunt before she’s all beat up.” Without warning, he buried his face between your legs, still spreading you open as his tongue flattened repeatedly over your clit.
Despite being alone in the woods with him, you still instinctively slapped your hand over your mouth to muffle the loud moan you let out. Your other hand was quick to find the back of his head, taking a handful of his wild hair but trying not to tug too hard. “Fuck, Eddie! Feels so good,” You panted. You could feel his grin the entire time, even as he moved to push his tongue inside of you and his nose nudged your clit again and again. Quite frankly, you were surprised he could still breathe.
“Pussy tastes so fucking good, babe. Might not even get to fuck you, you’re about to make me blow my load in my jeans like some virgin.” Pressing his tongue forcefully against your clit, he shook his head back and forth, drawing a sharp squeal from you. He eased the tip of one finger into your entrance, chuckling when your hips jolted and forced it in deeper. “That’s it, princess. ‘M gonna stretch you out on my fingers, make you come once or twice to get you ready for my cock.” He sank a second finger into you alongside the first, rings pressing against your hole in a way that had you shaking. 
“Oh my god,” You sighed. Your head fell back against the table with a noisy thunk that made him laugh quietly against you again. 
“Mmm, I’ll bet that feels good, huh? You’re taking ‘em so well, sweetheart. Such a good girl for me, practically sucking my fingers in.” His palm rubbed against your clit as he stood briefly, leaning down to press his lips to yours again. The low moans he was coaxing from you made it hard to reciprocate the kiss, but he didn’t mind– you could taste yourself on his tongue before he gently bit down on your lower lip and tugged. “Sorry, baby, you’re just so gorgeous I couldn’t help it. Had to give you a kiss.” His mouth made its way down your body again, leaving kisses and multicolored hickeys behind until it met your clit.
 Eddie curled his fingers until he prodded a spot inside you that you’d never been able to find yourself, reducing your previously semi-coherent moans to nothing but high-pitched babbling as you clenched around his fingers. Hips rolling to meet the movements of his hand and mouth, you let out a stream of jumbled pleas and swears. “Getting close? Good, you just go ahead and come for me, pretty girl.” 
Your legs trembled and you let out something between a moan and a sob, harsh and humiliating. Eddie’s free hand rubbed up and down your thigh soothingly as he let you rock your hips against his face and hand until your high and its aftershocks had passed. You clutched at his shoulders, trying your best to pull him up to you without having a shirt to grasp at. “C’mere, Eddie, please?”
“I’m right here, sweet girl. Don’t worry.” He kissed your forehead, then your temple, then your lips. “You did awesome, baby. My good girl.”
With his forehead pressed lightly against yours, you reached down to fumble with his belt buckle. “Need you, Eddie. Gotta feel you.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice,” He quipped. Guiding your hands away, he undid his belt and the button on his jeans much faster than you could have. Gingerly, he pulled you to a sitting position with your legs dangling over the edge of the table. Your arms settled loosely around his neck as he freed his length from his jeans and checkered boxers. He paused as if suddenly remembering something, then pulled his wallet from his back pocket opening it and taking out a foil square.
Scoffing playfully, you said, “And what lucky girl was that supposed to be for?”
“You, obviously,” He replied instantly. “A respectable man is always prepared.”
“Really selling the ‘gentleman’ bit tonight, huh, Munson?” You cracked, watching him tear open the package and roll the condom on.
“Gotta treat you right, princess. Can’t have you going anywhere.” His hand pressed to your lower back, rings pressing into your skin in the most perfect way for the hundredth time. He rubbed the head of his cock over your clit a couple times, making your nails bite into his shoulders, before he slowly started to push inside. “Shit, so tight. You okay, sweetheart?”
You nodded rapidly, “Mmhm, ‘m okay. ‘S just really big, Eds.”
“Oh, I know, baby– but you’re taking it so well for me, aren’t you? You’re gonna take all ‘a this dick and I’m gonna make you come all over it, yeah?” His hands cradled your jaw, making you look up into his eyes. 
“Y-Yes,” Your voice was croaky from the way you were holding back whines and cries.
One hand remained on your lower back while the other grasped your thigh and hiked it a bit higher up his side. “So fucking good, baby. My good girl.” Winding your fingers into his hair, you pulled him down for a deep, slow kiss. The slow, leisurely rolling of his hips turned into purposeful thrusts that had you gasping into his mouth.
His hand on your thigh guided you to prop your foot up on the edge of the table, spreading you open further for him. He left a final chaste kiss on your lips and pulled back to watch as he cupped one of your breasts, squeezing it firmly before grazing down your stomach. He pressed down there, making your eyes squeeze shut and your walls clench around him. You couldn’t focus on anything but the way he was filling you; it was overwhelming. While you prattled on incoherently about how good he was making you feel, he slid his hand further down, rubbing quick circles on your clit. It was likely he’d have red marks from the way your nails dragged down his back, but he didn’t seem to mind.
“God, you’re a fucking dream come true, you know that?” He rested his forehead against yours again, still fucking into you in a way that had all his words sounding kinda hazy to you. “My pretty baby, making me feel so good. I’m not gonna last long, think you can come for me?”
You hummed out another shaky ‘mmhm’ and buried your face in the crook of his neck. “F-Feels so good, Eddie, please–”
“Go on, sweetheart. You can do it, soak my cock.” He sweetly kissed your hairline a few times as he picked up his pace slightly. Your body spasmed underneath him, arms tightening around him until you were pressed flush against each other. His lips were beside your ear when his breath hitched. Quiet grunts spilled from him as he clutched your hips, rutting into you desperately and unevenly. The mixture of swears and moans and your name that left him was mostly incoherent as he came, feeling you quiver as you recovered from your own orgasm.
As the two of you took panting breaths, Eddie’s arms settled snugly around you, holding you to him as yours wrapped around his back. He only pulled back when you giggled into his chest, narrowing his eyes at you playfully. “What?”
“Nothing, we just had the greatest sex ever and you’re bear-hugging me.” Another little chortle slipped out and he shook his head but couldn’t hold back his smile.
“Well, forgive me for wanting to hold my girl after I fuck her half to death.” He looked down to watch as he carefully pulled out of you, letting out another one of his overdramatized groans when some of your slick pooled beneath you on his denim vest. “Christ, I’m about to be ready for round two.”
“Buy me dinner first, Munson.”
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wooahaes · 7 months
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a bigger push
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pairing: non-idol!jihoon x gn!reader
genre: not really spooky, more fluffy, the opening line is misleading.
word count: 0.8k~
warnings: prank gone kinda wrong. mentions of hyunsuk/yosh/junkyu having a group chat w/o jihoon & reader (so they can complain abt them being obvious).
daisy's notes: thank u to isa @sseastar my beloved for help w this <3
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Life felt like it’d suddenly become a horror movie within one night.
The night was simple. The five of you had been planning this small camping trip for a while now. Hyunsuk had wanted to show off things he’d learned, and the rest of you had kind-of vaguely agreed that it would be nice to spend a few days in nature. Night had begun to close around the five of you, with you sitting close to Jihoon as Yoshi told this story he’d read when looking up these woods. Jihoon’s hand was pressed against your own, his pinkie just stretching far enough to link around your own. Despite the little display of affection, you weren’t exactly sure what the two of you were. Sometimes you swore he was flirting with you, other days you couldn’t help but feel jealous whenever he flirted with other people—meaning that you weren’t special, were you? It was.. strange, but you didn’t mind the tiny touches like this one. He didn’t do that with other people, from what you could tell. 
When something snapped in the woods, you’d latched onto his arm immediately. One thing led to another (another crack, and then rustling, and then this low growl that was enough to send all of you scattering), and now… Well… 
Now you were standing in the woods, heart racing, and Jihoon was with you. He stared down at the phone in his hands, the light illuminating his face as he groaned. 
“No signal,” he said. “Where’s your phone?”
Patting down your pockets, you quickly discovered that you must have dropped it. Fuck. “Jihoon—” Your voice shook, and Jihoon’s gaze met your own immediately.
“Hey—” Jihoon took a step forward, taking your face into his hands to keep your focus on him. “It’s okay. We’re together. We just need to go find the others and get back to the car.”
“Fuck the others! I’ve seen horror movies—We just need to get to the car first and drive until we find them.” You paused. “If we find them—if they haven’t taken the car—”
“You don’t mean that,” he said, voice softer. “You watch too many movies.”
Maybe you did. Junkyu was the only one who ever watched them with you. Jihoon did too, sometimes, but he’d scare far easier (unlike Hyunsuk, who outright refused because he knew he’d be terrified—you had to respect how well he knew himself) than either of you. Movies were fake. This… This was real, not shot through a lens with the intention of scaring people. 
You squeezed your eyes shut, anxiety building higher and higher until it choked you. All too easily, you’d begun to cry. “I don’t like this…” You reached for his hands, curling your fingers around them. “I wanna go back home.”
“It’s okay,” he said again, thumbs running across your cheeks. “Can I tell you something? In case we don’t make it back?”
Your eyes shot open, and immediately you heard him apologize—it was a bad joke. Yet your voice felt so small as you spoke again, “... Hoony?”
“I like you,” he said. “I’ve wanted to tell you that for a while, actually. I think you’re sweet, and… and I want to take you out on a date after we get back home. Okay?”
With a shy nod, you latched onto the thought to keep yourself grounded. “Okay,” you said. “Promise?”
He offered up his pinkie to you, and you curled yours around it. “Promise,” he reaffirmed, “wherever you want to go, I’ll take you there.” He let go of your face, offering his hand back to you. “Just hold onto my hand. Let’s go get your phone and see if the others made it back to camp. We should be able to see our lights when we get closer.” 
With Jihoon’s hand in your own, you walked with him—Jihoon one step ahead, insisting that he’ll be brave enough to protect you if something happened. His hand was warm, and you felt the way his fingers tightened around your hand a little, just to keep you tethered to him securely. Sure enough, the two of you could see the lights that the five of you had set up around your little camp area… accompanied by loud howls of laughter underneath someone ranting. Jihoon turned, gaze meeting your own as his brows drew together, and continued to guide you forward.
Yoshi was profusely apologizing while Hyunsuk continued rant, pacing to and fro with his hands thrown up in the air. Junkyu, on the other hand, was collapsed onto the ground, holding his stomach as he laughed like a complete menace. What the fuck…?
“I thought you saw the group chat!”
“Usually you call me for important stuff!” Hyunsuk huffed. “We live together! Why wouldn’t you just tell me to my face!”
“I just said I thought you saw the message—”
“And you didn’t add them to the group chat!” Hyunsuk said, a finger jabbing toward Yoshi. “We could have made a new one!” 
Junkyu caught the sight of the two of you first, and immediately his laughter died down, realization hitting him. “Wait, shut up—”
“They wouldn’t have seen our messages if we made a new group chat—”
“They watch movies with Junkyu all the time, I didn’t think they’d run!”
“Guys!” Junkyu snapped, immediately getting the attention of the other two. A moment later, they noticed you and Jihoon as well… and then noticed the way Jihoon hadn’t let go of your hand.
Which began round two of apologies for a prank gone horribly wrong. At least Yoshi’s attempt at getting Jihoon back was what drove Jihoon to confess to you. Plus… Jihoon would hold him to the promise of buying the two of you lunch as an apology.
(And just the two of you. Wherever you wanted to go, Jihoon would take you there if it meant seeing your smiling face again.)
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taglist: @twancingyunhao
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trashbag-baby666 · 25 days
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In my most truest angst form, I wanted to touch more on John and his ED in my hs au.
C/W-mentions of John having an ed.
As previously mentioned in past hc’s, John’s always been pretty picky about his food. Chicken strips are his biggest safe food and always has been. Unless, he knows he likes something else on the menu, John always orders chicken strips and fries. He calls himself a profession chicken strip expert, he knew the best ones and he said it certainly wasn’t canes.
John’s always had weird eating habits, he would bring his own lunches from home and wouldn’t eat them. Sometimes he would eat school lunch if a, Gale made him, or b it was chicken strip day or orange chicken days. During the summers he would spend with Gale it was similar of him not eating. When they were that age he just boiled it down to John rambling about his adhd medication and how it just kinda takes away his appetite.
It’s specifically when they’re juniors that things begin to hit a peak for him. His parents forced him back onto his adhd medication because of his grades. They were fighting worse than ever, anytime he was home his mom was chewing him out over something, blaming him for his father’s cheating. He knew very well that his mother loathed the fact that he looked just like his father. She made sure he didn’t forget.
These were the days where Curt and Gale could tell just by one look, if today would be a good day or bad day. He would push his food around at lunch until the bell sounded, that or if it touched he wouldn’t eat it. Gale caught on pretty fast, of course. He wasn’t pushy about it, or upfront about it, he just offers some kind words. “Do you wanna go get lunch from somewhere? I’ll buy it for you?” Or something that Gale finds to be more successful is when they share food. That way John isn’t over whelmed by his own plate and rather it’s something him and Gale can share. Except he knows that John finds it hard eating infront of others. At school it’s fine but if they’re out at a restaurant, Gale just politely asks for a box and an extra cup of ranch. He knows within an hour of John going home he’s gonna destroy the chicken strips left.
Unfortunately, things start to get worse around January. John’s having an even harder time eating just about anything, he dislikes the feeling of his food digesting. He learns pretty quick he can get around Gale if he waits till he’s in class after lunch and asks to go to the bathroom.
Gales beyond devastated when he finds out John’s been making himself throw up. He’s somewhat at a loss of how he can help John. He ends up making the difficult decision to really actually talk about it with him. They both had actively avoided talking about it with the other. Gale waits for a more appropriate time to bring it up with John.
They’re laying on Gales bed, John’s staring at the ceiling throwing a small ball up into the air and catching it. Gales trying to read his book but the thoughts are eating him away. He slowly put his book mark into his book and sets it on the nightstand.
He knows he has to watch how he phrases his words, he didn’t want John to get defensive and clam up.
“Can we talk about something?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry to bring it up, but John I’m getting worried about you and your eating habits.”
“Wuddya’ mean?”
“You haven’t been eating.”
John freezes up when Gale says that, he feels kinda like a child who just got caught red handed. He just shrugs it off with a small, “So?” But Gale most certainly isn’t going to leave it at that. So, he somewhat lets it go for the night and lands on they’ll talk about it again tomorrow.
They let the next day go by until they’re walking through the woods behind Gales house. Meatballs running ahead of them and Johns playing with a stick. But it isn’t Gale who brings it up it’s John.
He’s snapping this twig into pieces, “I was thinkin’ about what you said last night. Maybe it’s just because I’m on Adderall again but…I don’t know?” He shrugged tossing his broken up twig aside.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to know, I just wanna help you.”
John was struggling for his words, he felt uncomfortable talking about it. He didn’t know why? He could trust Gale with anything…but they just kept walking.
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More to come?? Thanks for reading :3!!!<3
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scoops-ahoy-fics · 2 years
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miss priss || eddie munson x reader oneshot
good people need breaks sometimes too, and you know you're at your limit. maybe eddie can help? might as well give it a try, what could go wrong?
reader: female
characters: eddie munson
genre: angst to fluff <3
spoiler warning?: none
notes: hiya!! first eddie post of probably many, i know how much y'all love him. i hope i wrote him well! please enjoy! @musicalgamerotaku
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Eddie thought it was a prank when a note was slipped into his locker. Ripped from a notepad, words were scribbled into it in cursive. “Woods by the school after class. Please meet me there!” He didn't think it was real and was honestly suspicious. But ... he could be in for a surprise. No signature, no name, nothing that could possibly identify them. Hmm ... quite interesting indeed.
The boy walked into the woods alone, looking around before he saw somebody sitting alone at a picnic table. The person at the top of his class, the person that would definitely not be buying drugs from THE Eddie Munson, you. He tilted his head and walked closer, humming softly.
“Well, the handwriting matches up, but the motive? Kinda missing. Are you the person who wrote this note?” he said, walking towards the picnic table and sitting across from you.
“U-Uh- yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't want to write my name, I didn't want to give myself away- or anything like that-” you said, looking around cautiously. “No one's gonna come find us here, right? I heard this is where you do drug deals and stuff, I didn't know for sure ...” you whispered, fiddling with your thumbs. This was the farthest out of your comfort zone you've ever been.
Eddie's eyes widened, a bit confused. “You wanna do a drug deal? With me? You want to actually BUY drugs? The top of our class, the girl that's gonna go on to work in politics or law, the one who was voted most likely to succeed, is buying drugs from Eddie Munson? What a day!” he laughed, throwing his head back dramatically.
“Please keep your voice down, I want this stuff to stay between us ... if it got out, I would be ruined. I have to keep my reputation up, I would actually fucking die if it were tarnished,” you said, not looking into his eyes.
The male raised a brow. “Goodie-two shoes has quite the unexpected vocabulary. Never heard you curse. Barely here you speak aside from giving answers in class or speeches. You don't have many actually conversations, do you?”
You looked up at him, your eyes showing a confused expression. “Is it that obvious? Am I that- I'm not talking about this right now. I'm just trying to buy something,” you said, your breathing starting to pick up the pace as you tried to figure out what exactly you were doing.
“I get it, I get it. I won't talk about that shit anymore. Got any idea of what you want? I got weed on me, anything else we'll have to go back to my place. Twenty dollars for an ounce,” he said, propping his chin up on his hand.
You gulped slightly, nodding and pulling out your purse. He noticed your hands shaking, and how entirely stressed out you seemed to be. You were normally calm and collected, but you were a total mess. And he knew people who were near a breakdown probably didn't need this right now.
“... somethin' tell me you don't really wanna do this, do you? What's on your mind right now?”
And that's the question that broke you.
You didn't look him in the eyes, you just stared down at your purse, but all of your movements halted. You took a deep breath, attempting to compose yourself. “A lot,” you croaked out.
Eddie thought for a moment before resting his hands on yours and taking them out of your purse. He zipped it up and slid it to the side. “Let me tell you what you need. You don't need weed. You don't need drugs. You need a friend. Wow, I should win an award for that, I'm willingly turning away a customer,” he laughed, before resting his hands on yours.
“Close your eyes and clear you head. You probably have a lot swirling around that big brain of yours, so I'm gonna let you enjoy the silence for just a minute. And then you're gonna realize that you don't wanna do drugs, you still are a little bit of goodie good at heart. You're only doing this to attempt to rebel even though you don't want to. You obviously don't wanna be a druggie but you don't wanna deal with the stress at the top. You wanna walk the middle. So do it ... I'm gonna shut up now and let you think on that,” he rambled on, not really knowing where he was going with this. This wasn't his thing, he was definitely not used to this.
You didn't close your eyes. You just stared at him for a minute. Every single word he said was true. He was probably pretty good at analyzing everyone by now, that's why he was so good at pinpointing you. And it made your soul feel a little less lonely.
The dam holding your tears back broke, letting out a sob as you held your face with your hands. “F-Fuck- you're right! Th-This isn't me, I don't know who I am! I've been so caught up being p-perfect that I'm wasting the best years of my l-life!”
Eddie stared at you for a moment, not knowing what to do. He wasn't really used to people showing emotions, he was used to giving people a good show. So he might as well put on that good show, right?
He walked around to your side of the table and took your hands. “You've still got a life left to love, huh? Enjoy it. Let me help, how about we go around and do the shit you've never gotten to do. Maybe we'll find the stuff you like and dislike, find that personality that's hiding deep down in there. I get it if you don't wanna hang out with The Freak or whatever, but it might be worthwhile.”
You thought for a moment before slowly nodding. “Y-Yeah, that sounds okay ... do you have any ideas?”
Eddie thought for a moment. “Hear me out- now this might sound crazy- BUUUUUUUT. But but but. We go run around every stupid store in the newly built mall, and we find shit you like, and we buy it. I've got a lot of money saved up and I'm sure you've got some too if you were gonna go buy drugs. We can try to find the new you, or whatever.”
You smiled softly. “That sounds kinda cool, actually ... yeah, that could be great!”
The other stood up, offering you his hand. “Shall we, miss priss? Or maybe ex-miss priss. Who knows what's going on in that smart head of yours?”
You rolled your eyes and took it, interlocking your fingers. “Whatever you say,” you laughed, walking with the other happily.
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two-red-lungs · 2 years
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Ayooo. It sounds kinda cringe but eddie munson x vampire reader???? Or something like that. Or just x GN reader. That would be rlly swag of you :D
NO BC THIS IS PERFECT I was like "man I really wanna write a little about the Lost Boys/Stranger Things fic I'm working on, but IDK if the asker knows the Lost Boys" but you DO so sorry I am taking creative liberties w/ this imagine.
"Big Storm Coming" (Eddie Munson + LostBoys!Reader)
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Your brothers were rabble-rousers. Nare-do-wells. It made settling anywhere... difficult, when the police kept getting on their tails. They set fires, caused public chaos, spray-painted walls. Hell, you spray-painted walls when you were bored enough. Eternal life was excruciatingly boring.
Like clockwork Max would chew them out, probably throwing one of them across the room in anger, and then move all of you to a new town.
Probably for the best. David brought death with him everywhere, he was messy and angry like that, and Dwayne, Marko, and Paul followed his example. Usually leaving you and Star to clean up the disaster.
So, really, moving to Hawkins felt like any other clan migration. Low population, sleepy police force, lots of bored teens "prone to going missing", as David had put it with a tight, toothy smile.
Marko had cackled when Max said he was enrolling everyone in highschool to "keep you outta trouble". He thought it was a joke.
It was not a joke. When you tried to protest Max told you to shut it or he'd lock you out on the porch come sunrise.
You all went straight from Max's van doors to the school entryway. A half-second in the sun, shielded under jacket lapels and long hair.
It was, admittedly, pretty fun, blowing open those doors on your first day. As much as you had a love-hate relationship with your blood brothers, you had to admit they turned heads. You all did. Wild rocker hair, manic self-assured grins, spike-studded boots. Rock-and-roll, baby. The sea of hallway students parted for the five of you.
Paul and Dwayne, as usual, were flirting with any girl that came within five feet of them, taking bets on who'd get a number by the end of the day. But with Star home with Laddie and David glowering at everyone like he wanted to massacre everything and then hang himself, you were pretty much on your own.
Great. School, again. A year of faking interest in American history and just waiting for a drained corpse to be found in the woods.
And then. AND THEN. Hawkins High, shithole in the middle of Indiana, gave you the gift you'd be desperately hoping for.
"Principal's office, NOW, Munson!" A teacher screamed nearby, flinging open a classroom door and shoving out a tall, wild-maned, leather-jacket clad man. The man flipped a double bird to the closed door, shoved his hands in his pockets, and turned around to start trudging down the hall.
Freezing in place when he saw you. Two individuals, nearly identical in style. Outcasts. Lost, maybe.
An incredulous grin spread across his face, dark eyebrows disappearing up into messy fringe. "...Holy shit." He said with a disbelieving laugh. "Look at you. Rock on, man."
He introduced himself as Eddie Munson, blood thumping under his ivory-pale skin and smelling like American Spirit cigarettes, and all at once you were hooked. He was clearly excited to see someone else with a patch jacket sporting bands he knew. He asked you if you wanted to smoke sometime. You blindly agreed, distracted by that warm smile.
And as he walked away down the wide hall, saying "Boo!" to a passing group of freshmen girls and making them literally jump, two things were made utterly apparent to you.
One: Eddie Munson was going to save your high school experience from being the most boring thing ever.
Two: he needed to be protected from your brothers at all costs. None of you were allowed to be happy. To make friends. They destroyed those sort of things out of envy, of jealousy. And you would not let Eddie be a tally mark in David's kill ledger.
Thank you for the prompt: if you guys like this concept, please let me know! I'm considering a longer, multi-chapter crossover fic with Eddie/reader and the Hawkins gang VS Max's boys.
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frogwithhatto · 1 year
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Froggo!! Can you post some domestic Vessel headcannons? Like what he would be like if you two were living together or something like that 🥺 (or just whatever you feel like!!)
Domestic Vessel
Pairing: Vesselxgn!reader
Summary: What it would be like to live with Vessel. It’s just a bunch of fluffy headcanons tbh.
Tw: none ?
Notes: This was literally written yesterday night and I only proofread it once bc I got so excited so I hope there aren’t any mistakes! Thank you for the request anon I loved the idea!!
- He’s not that good at cooking but he will try to make fancier stuff for you every now and then. He definitely taught himself how to make your favourite and your comfort food. Most of the time you two would cook together probably listening to some music while doing so. Get ready for silly dances and hopping around the kitchen with him but also if there’s a romantic song playing he would definitely slow dance with you.
- We know Vessel is a little science nerd so get ready to watch documentaries with him for hours! He definitely loves the serious super interesting ones but oh boy he’s a sucker for the trashy alien and/or gold digger ones. You know those really bad ones that never get to the point? Because those can get hard to watch you two would play Uno while watching!
- I also feel like he loves reading so get ready for sitting next to each other on your couch/bed your legs crossed over his lap sharing a blanket while either both of you read or he reads and you play nintendo (or whatever you like)
- If you’re not that big of a reader (or if you’re tired) he would definitely read his book to you. Like imagine you having your head in his lap as he makes funny voices for the different characters? He would be so cute!
- You’re the first to hear new lyrics and song ideas! „babe? Quick tell me if this slaps.“ (proceeds to play the most random thing you’ve ever heard but it does in fact go hard) He would also play guitar/piano for you if you asked him to. He definitely has recorded you a cover of your favourite song or even written you a song for a special occasion before
- He’s bath guy because I said so. He will bathe at least once a week if not more and he will ask you to join him not in a sexual way but more in a „let me wash your hair for you“ kinda way. If he has a bad day you would draw him a bath making sure to use his favourite bath salt and pick one of your oversized hoodies out for him to wear after it.
- Vessel is a big my clothes are yours and your clothes are mine guy. Will steal your hoodies, shirts and even jewellery.
- On the other hand if you had a bad day get ready for some cuddles and a comfort movie/show of your choice. (If you want to be alone he’s also very understanding but he will check on you from time to time asking if you need anything.)
- Lazy Sundays with Vessel would include sleeping in and after waking up you would start off the day by cuddling for as long as you wanted to. At some point you two would get up to make breakfast together and after it you either go straight to bed again to catch up on a show you’re watching or you get ready to go out (if you’ve made plans to go somewhere)
- „You wanna go take a walk in the woods??“ „Vessel it’s 10 pm… it’s super dark, cold and isn’t it raining outside?“
- He will leave notes for you around the apartment if he knows you will be home before he is. A little „I love you“ with squiggly hearts around it sticking on the fridge or maybe a random dad joke with a doodle on your dresser to make you smile.
- He will definitely send you postcards when he’s touring! Sometimes letters as well he’s a hopeless romantic which include the most random stuff. „The logo on this tag reminded me of you.“ „I thought you would like this flower I picked and pressed for you.“ You definitely keep everything he sends you though. Sometimes the letters will also include Polaroids of him and the other Vessels! (Maybe even a picture II took of him when he was writing said letter)
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wayward-lives · 8 months
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Prompt list
Hey guys! This is all the prompts I had in my writing folder that I never got around to writing anything for. Some of them are just a couple of words or sentences, while others are absolute monsters. If any of you wanna do something based on one of these prompts, go for it! I'd love it if you tagged me or let me know, just so I can read/see where you've gone with it <3
"How about you take me out back and I don't call you tomorrow?" "How about I take you home after and you sneak out when I'm asleep?" // "You make a habit of sneaking around behind buildings?" "Last time I did, I fucked a cute guy. Maybe I'll get lucky again."
Nymph Bucky falls in love with a hiker who walks through his woods
Post WS. Bucky is in SHIELD custody and doesn’t remember Steve, but he remembers Natasha from the Red Room when she was a child
Vet Bucky. Steve is running from New York after the Snap and he hits a dog and brings it into Bucky's clinic
Bucky doesn't do relationships, but Steve keeps seeing him for sex and Bucky falls in love - friends with benefits (what's love got to do with it - Tina Turner)
College AU - Bucky is an international student who's paired with Steve's roommate Sam
Steve and Bucky are close friends, Steve is complaining one night about how annoying hook-up culture is, and Bucky suggests a FWB situation. Bucky's been in love with Steve for years and it's only when they start sleeping together that Steve realises that he feels the same way
Bucky recognises Steve during their fight on the bridge
Bucky and Steve had broken up, but they keep sleeping together whenever they run into each other
Shrunkyclunks: nurse Bucky works at Stark tower
"just friends who have sex sometimes and live together" where Bucky and Steve don't realise they're dating
Winter Soldier Steve/civilian Bucky
Pirate AU - Bucky's dad is a fisherman who takes Bucky out on trips. One day when Bucky's twelve, they're taken by the crew of the HYDRA, run by Captain Pierce. Pierce kills Bucky's father and keeps Bucky as a slave. Several years later the captain from a rival ship (Steve) is captured by Pierce and he and Bucky fall in love
A/B/O post-winter soldier where the mask doesn't come off and the WS is brought into custody at Avengers tower by Natasha, and Steve falls in love with him without knowing he's his long-lost mate
Steve survives the war but Bucky still falls off the train. In the 50's the Winter Soldier has a mission in New York and on his way is spotted by Rebecca Barnes's daughter, who's eight and has been told all about her uncle Buck. The daughter finds it so amazing that this total stranger looks exactly like uncle Buck and pulls him along to meet Rebecca, who has a breakdown and persuades the Winter Soldier to come home with her. The Winter Soldier just kinda goes along with it because nobody's ever been nice to him and this lovely woman has promised him meatloaf and pie and for some reason he knows that he really likes meatloaf and pie. Becca calls up Steve and the Winter Soldier moves in with Steve because Becca can't look after her amnesiac brother on top of two kids and a third on the way
Big Eden Shrinkyclinks AU
I hope it's warm in hell, because darling I hate the cold
My dreams look like you - Steve and Bucky used to be best friends during high school but lost contact when Steve moved away - they meet again at a mutual friend's party when Steve moves back home
Steve and Bucky used to be together and are both masked vigilantes. They have a bit of a rivalry going but the fun kind where they both kinda wanna fuck. Neither of them know who the other is.
Post WS - Steve and Sam move back to NY to be closer to the other avengers. Sam starts noticing someone following him and watching him and he soon realizes it’s Bucky. Sam starts gently trying to get Bucky to interact with him and starts buying him sweet pastries. Soon Bucky becomes more comfortable and lets Sam help him recover as long as Sam doesn’t tell Steve
(NSFW) Steve is a knight who often visits a manor house where a disgraced Lady lives. The Lady was disgraced for her promiscuous and sexual appetites, but she's comfortably set up in the Manor. Steve visits because the Manor's on a path he travels often, and it's one of the only places to rest for the night. The Lady always sends a group of her servants to service her guests, and Steve is used to this by now. Bucky is a new servant who works in the kitchen who's sent to Steve's chambers with food, and he sits by Steve's bed and hand-feeds him as Steve is serviced. Steve never takes his eyes off Bucky. Each time Steve visits after that, they manage to see each other
Bucky chooses to forget Steve and has his memory erased, because it’s too painful for him to be around Steve when he thinks that Steve doesn’t love him. A few years later Steve picks Bucky up in a bar and pretends not to know him
Prompt: My husband thinks that our parents arranged this marriage. We’ve been married for ten years now, and for ten years he has thought this. I’m not sure how to tell him that my parents wanted me to marry his older brother but I fell in love with the younger brother (my husband) so I pretended to be my parents and sent his parents a letter asking for his hand in marriage. And then the wedding invitations were being made, and it was too late for my parents to do anything. And I was very happily married to my Husband, but he courted me for two years after our marriage not knowing that I was already in love with him.
Steve falls for vet nurse and animal lover Bucky despite being allergic to pretty much all household pets and trying to hide it
Shrunkyclunks - a few dates in Steve tells Bucky he's Captain America, but Bucky doesn't believe him and thinks he's delusional. He doesn't tell Steve he doesn't believe him and has a moral crisis about whether or not he should be dating someone with such strong "delusions". Steve just thinks he's hit the jackpot with supportive boyfriends.
Pirate Captain Bucky captures Navy Captain Steve from his ship and holds him for ransom (very homoerotically) (steve is confused and horny)
Steve is a warrior in his village who's come down with a mysterious illness. The townspeople send him to the "evil" witch who lives in the forest to see if he can be healed
Weird a/b/o
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Hardly any Queen Omegas, those who are a threat to national security. Bucky is the WS working to murder hydra and Steve is sent to take the same hydra base that the WS targets
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nsomniacsdream · 3 months
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I've been playing universim. It's gorgeous. But it takes sooooo long. I've been playing for 2 days and I still haven't gotten into space. There's a bunch of stuff I wanna do there so I'm not giving up, but I'm talking like 2 8 hour days of this game. You have to earn research points and then spend 10 to 20 minutes researching it. Sometimes, and I don't know why, all of your power generating devices will just stop doing that, or your batteries will just not charge. It's tracking a lot of stuff and sometimes a character or two will just slip off into nothingness. I'll be watching a guy heading somewhere with the supplies I need to build something and he'll walk behind another building and never come out again. I looked on the forums and it seems to be one of the most common complaints, having to go thru all of human evolution everytime you start a new world. It would be nice if they would bookmark you at a certain tech tier if you unlock everything for that tier and maybe do a little extra or something. But I guess it kinda makes sense? You never stop needing wood and stone. Every tier of technology is just reprocessing everything you made at the lower tier. Like one steel bar is like 600 stone and 100 oil. This is not a real number I'm just exaggerating for effect.
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nyxronomicon · 2 years
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Werwolf dia makes me wanna run around in circles lmao. Like at first he absolute terrified you shitless but hes actually just a lonely softie looking for love and head pats😂
Imagine you just moved into a farm house and noticed some sort of hut made of twigs and grass around the tree line. First you think its prolly just a pile of disposable yard waste the previ owners didn’t clean up but the hut kind of has some strange entrance on the side. Theres also some kind of animal bone??? Eh may be its a bear that used to burrow here :-/.
WRONG. You drove home late one night and noticed the entire property is unusually quiet, not even crickets. You park your car on the drive way and immediately notice large amber orbs staring at you from the tree-lines. You dont know wtf it is. Maybe its the bear maybe its those poachers playing tricks on you. Whatever it is it freaking you tf out so you bolt to your porch struggling to open the door. You feel vibrations behind you. Its not those poachers, its prolly larger than a bear and way faster. You hear its breathing and growling. You close the door and lock it just in time to hear your front porch creek and snap from it massive weight. Whatever this thing was is now circling your entire house, you do a 360 in your home and locked all the doors and windows. You are now scared as shit, holding a butcher knife against your front door. What ever it was is trying to get into your house and you can feel it scratching at the wood, its breath rumbles through the walls and you can feel it breeze thru the tiny gap underneath the door. It wiggled your door knob several times and scratched some more, looking to find away in. Finally you peaked from the curtains in you kitchen to see this big ass lycan scratching away at your front door. Looks like a male and he must be at least 9 ft tall. Hes fucking massive and the red fur on his back made him look even bigger. Hes right in front of the porch blocking you access to your car , the only choice is to barricade yourself and wait till he leaves. You do exactly that and eventually he scurries away but you can help but notice a slight whimpering he made while walking away dejected.
This went of for a full week, before night fall you lock and barricade your house. The red werwolf would come scratching your door, sometimes it stands in its hind legs and stares directly at your 2nd floor bedroom window. Sometime it jumps onto the roof of your porch and tries to look thru ur curtains but you always have ur curtains closed, fearing he might find you. You also noted that, aside from scratching, he never damaged your property, never flipped your car, or broke your roof. Its almost like hes trying to terrorize you in a polite way. This went on for a week until one day he stopped, but that was also the night you hear yelling and gun shots. They sounded like those asshole poachers but u knew better than to step outside of safety. The next morning you find some naked guy with red hair unconscious on your drive way, 2 gun shot wounds on his shoulders. You tried to wake him up but he only hummed and groaned in pain. Its going to take a while for any paramedic to get to your place so you thought maybe you can clean his shoulder and patch it up and then just leave the rest to him.
Dude literally sprung up while you were trying to disinfect his bullet wound and hes just— “ awww I was wondering when you would say hi to me. I always tried to say hello but you just ran back to your house 🥺🥺”
And u are just sitting there completely dumfounded like— so THIS is the werewolf/guy what was chasing me and scratching my door every night??? HIM???????? This grade A juicy looking steak dude?? Man boobies outta the world kinda guy?? 👁👄👁
Turns out hes been living here his whole life but in complete isolation since he literally scared everyone that ran into him. He really was just tryna say hello and he didnt mean to scare you. He just got so excited that someone moved in and he might actually get to socialize. He even moved your trash can and cleaned your front yard, got rid of rodents/pests too.
Ah. So thats why your yard seemed so nice these days. Maybe he deserves a few head pats or two, his hair does look soft and tbh hes quite handsome :)
Maybe yall can become friends and he can scare away the poachers and emo teens littering around your property. Maybe you get to have a werewolf house husband that doubles as a soft blanket and guard dog :))
Imma let yall decide on that💕😈
Ok I could not get this outta my head all morning...
Like it starts out soft and you're spending a lot of time together since you're doing work on the house and even just in his human form he's strong AF so he can easily help you out. He still goes to his hut at night when he's in wolf form bc he doesn't want to impose but you eventually let him live in the barn since you're not actually using it for farming.
Obviously, as a werewolf, he's gonna go into heat...
🔞 NSFW under the cut 🔞
He kinda holes up in the barn which is weird bc he doesn't leave you alone usually. After a day or two you go check on him to bring him snacks or something and he doesn't answer for a while. You're really worried at this point so you're about to bust the door down when he opens it just a crack.
"Please, go away..." He growls.
"Why, what's up?" Your voice is laced with concern.
"It's... Nothing." He sounds gruff, exhausted. "It's fine."
"Then why haven't I seen you in a while?" You pout, unaware of the effect just your presence had on him.
"It's embarrassing." He growls again, though his eyes hungrily dance along your form.
"You can tell me, Dia." His heart raced as you spoke, all his energy funneled into self-restraint as your scent wafted into the barn.
He looked wild, unkempt. Not that he didn't always, it was just more than usual now. You couldn't quite place the look in his eyes, he'd never stared at you like this before.
"I'm..." He grumbled, hesitating before the words fell out of his mouth. "In heat." His face turned red and his gaze finally broke from you.
The look in his eyes was lust. He wanted to fuck you, that much was clear.
"... should only be a few more days." He mumbled, your silence echoing far louder than words.
He was about to close the door when he noticed resistance. Glancing up, he saw you in the threshold, your beautiful eyes on him.
"Can I help?" Your sweet voice called to him. He wanted to resist. He wanted you to remain pure, untarnished from this stupid curse that turned him into an animal so often.
Of course, things almost never worked out the way he wanted them to, and the animal in him had already tugged you into the barn without a thought. His lips crashed into you with a ravenous kiss, his strength holding you against him almost suffocatingly. You could already feel his throbbing length against your stomach.
He pulled away after a few moments. "You should go. Before I do something we'll both regret."
"I won't regret it." You stood your ground.
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My grumpsona
Name- Distiny Springbake
Date of birth- January 31st 2006
Pronouns- She/Her
Sexuality- Trans, Lesbian, Asexual
Height- 5,6
Age- 16
Language and accent- British, can speak Latin
Occupation- artist, guitar player, archer
Extra info- She has Aspergers syndrome, ADHD, social anxiety and depression. She is very shy and doesn’t like to talk to people she doesn’t know or trust. Can be dangerous when angry( she bites, scratches and can throw punches). When she’s frustrated or extremely upset she will scratch at her arms and legs and tear her fur and hair out. She has sensory issues especially with sound, light and smells. Has anger issues. Bad sleep schedule, she could sleep for 6 hours or less or not at all. She has a bad reaction when eating spicy food when eating too much in a short amount of time. Her voice goes hoarse and eventually stops working, her eyes will feel itchy and she’ll throw up, She doesn’t tell anyone though. She has a bit of a delayed reaction. She sleep walks sometimes. Made her own bow and arrow whilst in sugarpine woods (with Chandlo’s and Snorpy’s help). She brought food and water but gave them to Shelda and Gramble because she felt like they needed it more than her.
Stims- Hand flaps, leg swings, popping sounds, whistling, bugsnak noises, feet taps.
Items from her messenger bag- Calico cat plushie that she sleeps with, food, water, 4 sketchbooks, pencils, rubbers, sharpeners, coloured pencils, sun glasses, cap, phone.
She also has Chewlery that looks like a shark tooth that she wears around her neck.
She sleeps in the mill on the first floor by the door that leads out to the waterfall behind the barn.
Likes- All grumps, Kweeble, sprout, drawing, sitting by the waterfall behind Grambles barn, fire, spicy snax, hot sauce, chocolate sauce, animals (mostly snakes), plushies, shiny things.
Fears- Scoopy bannoopy, deep water, heights, life-like dolls, pitch black, spiders, being alone.
Hates- loud noise, arguing, perfume, pictures of her face, ketchup.
When in Sugarpine woods- can be found in Snorpy’s cabin sitting on the floor, drawing in her sketchbook.
She sleeps in a small tent near the Cabin when she was living in the woods with Snorpy and Chandlo. But she rarely actually used the tent and instead slept on the floor of the Cabin with a blanket because she was scared of being alone. And because she slept on the floor Chandlo and Snorpy would wake up and trip over her (or almost trip over her).
When in Snaxburg- can be found in the mill sitting on her bed at 5 am, at the waterfall at 6-8 am, somewhere talking to someone during the day, sitting at the campfire on a stool at night.
She left home for ‘reasons’ and snuck onto Lizberts ship but was found by Wambus and Triffany and interrogated. She doesn’t talk about her life before Snaktooth, not even with the other expedition members.
Interview takes place in the mill on the second floor.
Interview:
B- Who are you?
D- I’m Distiny Springbake. I like to draw and show them off to the others. Although I’m not very good.
B-What kind of stuff do you like to draw?
D- I like to draw the bugsnax and sometimes the other grumps.
B- Why come to Snaktooth island?
D- I wanted to come here because it’s away from….. well I just wanted to see what these ‘bugsnax’ were and maybe make some new friends.
B- You started to explain that “it was far away from” something. Why did you cut yourself off?
D- ….I don’t wanna talk about it.
B- Thoughts on bugsnax?
D- I like em, Especially kweeble, they’re sooo cute! But the scoopy bannoopy is kinda.. scary.
B- Why did you leave town?
D- It was overwhelming. All the fighting and earthquakes and Liz and Egg’s disappearance, I couldn’t handle it. All of the shouting and noise and fear and… Sorry… I left to Sugarpine woods to calm down, and after a while Snorpy and Chandlo came along. And they let me stay with them.
B- are you close to Snorpy and Chandlo?
D- We’re good friends. Me and Snorpy sometimes hang out and come up with different theories. And sometimes I work out with Chandlo, although I can never keep up with him.
B- Any info on Lizbert?
D- Elizabert Megafig is kind, brave and understanding. When I was found after sneaking onto the ship, she didn’t yell or was angry with me. Instead she asked if I wanted to join them. Not like I had a choice though since I was already on a ship halfway to an unknown island.
B- You snuck onto the ship?
D- Oh. Did I not tell you? I didn’t ask to join the expedition or compete in a raffle, I snuck onto the ship when no one was looking. And do not try and ask why cause I’m not telling you.
B- What happened to Lizbert and Eggabell?
D- … I don’t know. They could’ve gotten hurt, or separated, or- Worse. But I don’t think they are- I know they’re ok. They have to be.
B- Thank you for your cooperation Distiny.
*End of Interview*
No problem. And hey, if you want to swap drawings or just talk, then come find me.
Opinions of Distiny:
Lizbert- She is shy and keeps to herself most of the time, but she can be fearless and brave when she needs to be.
Eggabell- Very accident prone that grump. She comes into the medical tent for scrapes, broken bones, fractures or burns. But she always manages to make a joke out of it.
Filbo- She’s so caring and sweet and a great friend. But she can be hard on herself sometimes, I just want her to be able to talk to me and everyone else.
Wambus- Distiny is.. strong I guess. And helpful. She helps me around the farm and all the others too. But she can be very… clingy.
Beffica- She’s hiding something, and it’s about why she’s here. I need to find out but she’s SO secretive. But, she’s nice to talk to sometimes.
Floofty- Not very intelligent that one. But she does like to listen to my notes and helps me acquire some of the things needed for my research. She is pleasant to be around.
Gramble- She’s very kind, and she loves to hang out and play with the Keebles. Although, she can be a bit… scary when she’s mad. I like her either way though.
Wiggle- She is very quiet and nervous most of the time. But I’ve heard the notes she can hit and she is a FANTASTIC singer! Almost as good as me. Almost.
Triffany- Such a sweet girl. I think she’s the only one who can handle all of my rambling. And her art of the things I talk about is absolutely amazing.
Cromdo- She’s a good kid, I’ll admit. But she’s got an attitude that anyone could hate. I can still feel the headache from that punch. She’s got strength, that’s for sure.
Chandlo- Distiny is awesome dawg! Her art is great and she’s so nice. But she could workout more, she can barely keep up with me when we’re running, lifting or even doing push ups. She’s still great to talk to.
Snorpy- She is the first grumpus who showed any interest in my theories about the grumpinati and anything in general. Very pleasant and smart. The theories she comes up with still amazes me.
Shelda- One who is me, enjoys the company of the Artist known as Distiny. She likes to partake in meditation by my side. Though one senses that there is a darkness surrounding her.
Get Distiny back to Snaxburg:
You cannot talk to Distiny until your able to talk to Snorpy. She doesn’t trust you until Snorpy does.
After talking to Snorpy for the first time you can talk to Distiny.
B- Hello, who might you be?
D- Oh umm. Hi, I-I’m Distiny. Do you need something?
B- Will you come back to Snaxburg?
D-Umm. Maybe. I don’t really want to leave yet.
But if you do some stuff for me then I’ll think about it. Sorry, was that too demanding?
B- Of course. What do you need?
D- Uhhh. Could you.. get me a spicy snak? I haven’t had one of those in a while.
New assignment: Spice of life.
Feed Distiny a spicy snak.
*you feed Distiny a spicy snak*
D- Thank you for that.
I have another favour. Can you bring me a kweeble. Their absolutely adorable. And please don’t feed it to me. I could never eat a kweeble.
New assignment: Cute little critters.
Give Distiny a kweeble
*You give Distiny the kweeble*
B-Here’s one kweeble.
D-Oh my grump! Thank you so much! Isn’t it adorable?
Ok. I have one more thing to ask. Do you think you could get something back for me? After I left town I… didn’t really bring my things but Chandlo got them for me. Except, he couldn’t find my phone, and I think Cromdo might’ve took it. If you’ve met Cromdo you’d know he likes to take peoples things. So could you ask him if he took it? And if he did, could you ask him to give it back please?
New assignment: Confrontation.
Ask Cromdo about Distiny’s phone.
D- Oh. He didn’t take it? Hm. Oh well, I guess I’ll have to try and find it when I go back. Thank you for that.
Side quests:
1:
D- Hey! Friend! Can I talk to you for a minute?
I just wanted to ask if you could get something for me?
B- Sure what is it?
D- I was wondering if you could get a picture of everyone for me?
B- What for?
D- It’s for… a project I’m doing…
B- Sure thing
D- Thanks.
*asking grumps for their pictures*
B- Hey do you mind if I take a picture of you?
New assignment: Picture perfect.
Take pictures of everyone in Snaxburg
Filbo- Oh! Uhh, sure Buddy.
Wambus- Sure. Why not?
Beffica- Only if I can take one of you ;0)
Gramble- Umm. Sure? I guess?
Wiggle- Of course darling~! Make sure to get my good side~.
Triffany- Ok hun. Whenever your ready.
Cromdo- Heh. Grumps will take pictures of me after I’m off this grump forsaken island. So yeah. Go right ahead.
Chandlo- Uhh. Sure bro!
Snorpy- As long as no one else sees it, then I’m fine with it.
*You hand over the pictures*
B- Here are the pictures.
D-Thanks a lot Friend! Too bad I can’t get Eggabell or Lizbert..
B-What do you plan to do with them?
D-You’ll see.
2:
B-Have you finished the thing yet?
D-Yep. Here, I made one for everyone. It took a while to do cause there’s a lot of us.
*Distiny gives you a drawing of Everyone together including you. It’s so cute.*
D- Do you like it? Do you think everyone else will like it?
B- Yeah. And I’m sure everyone will like it too.
D-Thats great. But, I’ve got another favour to ask… Sorry if I’m bothering you with all these favours. But I remember seeing something when I was living in sugarpine. It was kinda hard to see because it was night when I saw it, but it looked like a bunch of bugsnax in the shape of a grumpus. I know it sounds crazy but trust me, and if you ever run into it, can you tell me?
New assignment: Monster hunter
Find the bugsnax creature Distiny was talking about and scan it.
B- I saw the creature you were talking about.
D-Yeah! That’s it!
B- What’s wrong?
B- You look like you’ve seen a ghost.
D-It just… looks a lot more creepy when you see it in the light instead of in the cover of darkness. It’s just. Scary. That’s all.
B- Are you going to be ok?
D- yeah. Yeah, I’ll be fine.
Thanks for this, by the way.
3:
*You walk up to Distiny and Cromdo yelling at each other about something*
C- I bet I could beat you in any challenge you throw at me.
D- Oh yeah?! Ok then! How about… we eat spicy food and see who can last the longest. The one who takes a drink first looses.
C- Heh. You’ve got a deal pal.
D- May the best grump win.
B- What’s going on?
D- I just challenged Cromdo to a contest about eating spicy food. Hey, do you think you could get some spicy bugsnax? 6 should be enough. What Cromdo doesn’t realise is that I eat spicy foods for a living. I have an advantage.
New assignment: Live, laugh, spice.
Get half a dozen spicy bugsnax for Distiny’s and Cromdo’s spicy food challenge.
B- I’ve got the snax.
D- Awesome. Let’s get everyone here.
*Distiny and Cromdo are sitting at opposite ends of one of the tables from the research tent and everyone is gathered around to watch*
C- Are you ready to get destroyed kid?
D- I’m ready whenever you are.
*They eat their first snak*
C- Are you ready to chicken out yet?
D- Are you kidding? That was nothing!
*Second snak*
*Their eyes are watering*
D- I ain’t done yet. You?
C- Funny. Neither am I.
Wa- Things are gettin’ a bit heated, huh Triffy?
Tr- *laughing* Yep.
*third snak*
*they are now crying bullets and their throats are hoarse. Distiny isn’t looking too good*
C- Kid, maybe you should take some water-
D- No. I won’t break yet.
Ch- Dawg, you don’t look good. You should probably take the water?
D-I’m fi-
*Distiny’s voice suddenly stops*
Fi- Distiny!?
C- Here kid! Take the water! I’ll drink too, see?!
*Cromdo drink the water then Distiny does as well*
W- Darling are you ok?
G- Do you need more water?
D- I’m fine *she says in an agitated and very hoarse voice*
S- Maybe you should have some more just in case-
*Distiny gets up and walks towards the outhouse*
*When everyone is cleaning up, puking can be heard from the outhouse*
4: After Floofty and Shelda come back.
D- Hey! I just wanted to say sorry about what happened. I’m not usually like that. Well, kinda.
B- It’s fine, do you need something?
D- Yeah actually. I was wondering if I could come hunting with you in sizzling sands?
B- For what reason?
D- I just want to explore a bit more, and help you out too since me and everyone else have been asking a lot from you.
B- Sure
D- great. I’ll meet you there.
*You find Distiny at the entrance of Sizzling sands*
D- Hi! Thanks for letting me do this again. So which ones are getting first?
B- As much as we can carry
D- Cool. I’ll just go over here.
*Distiny runs off*
*A while later a scream can be heard*
*you run over and see that a loaded spuddy ran into Distiny and knocked her on her back*
*you catch the snak and carry Distiny back to Snaxburg on your back*
*You walk into town and shout for help*
*Filbo, Triffany and Floofty are the first to walk over*
Fi- What happened?!
Tr- They can tell us later, but Distiny isn’t looking too hot.
Fl- Bring her into Elizabert and Eggabell’s hut. Triffany, set up the cot.
*You enter the hut and after Triffany sets up the cot you place Distiny on it*
Fi- Could you tell us what happened Buddy?
*you explain what happened*
Tr- Oh my sweet dear.
Fl- She might have a few broken ribs and a bump on her head but she will be fine.
Filbo, tell everyone about the situation.
Fi- Ok.
*Filbo runs out*
*Distiny wakes up with a groan*
B- Are you ok?
D- Everything hurts..
But I’ll be fine.
B- What was the real reason you wanted to come out there with me?
D- Huh?
B- I can tell when your lying.
B- You’re a bad liar.
D- …
I wanted to… because I… I just…
I just don’t wanna be a burden..
I wasn’t very.. “liked” in my family, and it felt like everything I did was wrong or I got in the way. So I just wanted to do something useful for once.
B- …
D- Can you leave please. I wanna be alone for a while.
Snaxburg isn’t safe:
*During this main quest Distiny just observes while looking scared whilst everyone talks*
*After everyone splits up and Buddy is investigating and they talk to Distiny*:
D- This isn’t good. I should’ve said something to prove they aren’t lying. But no. I just stayed quiet… Sorry for being sounding so depressing. But this is getting out of hand.
Final party:
*Distiny is with Cromdo having a drink*
C- Hey kid. Aren’t you gonna go dance and have fun with Filbo?, And if the others decide to join, them too?
D- No. Dancing isn’t my thing. And Floofty said I need to take it slow because of. *points to stomach area*.
C- Right..
*Buddy walks over*
D- This party is… good. But I’m not a party grump.
B- you should go dance.
D- Sorry, but no. Like I said, I don’t like party’s. They’re too loud, bright and I can’t dance. Unless you can convince me, then I don’t think I’ll be joining.
*To make Distiny dance Wiggle will have to convince her and dance with her.*
W- Hey there darling! A little birdie told me you didn’t know how to dance. Well I’m about to change that. Let’s go!
D- O-oh ok Umm. Su-sure.
*during the fight she is with Snorpy and Chandlo and she helps by using her makeshift bow and arrow*
Final words:
This is probably for the best.. It’s better for everyone if I just. Leave. I never belonged anywhere. But I know that… I can count on bugsnax to make me feel good again.
Snorpy or Chandlo dies:
Oh my grump! Ohmygrump He’s- He’s dead. OH GRUMP NO!
After escaping Snaktooth (bad end):
I can’t believe it… He-he shouldn’t have. I-… I don’t have the words…
After escaping Snaktooth (good end):
Thank grump we all made it out. Well.. most of us anyway. It’s horrible what happened them. But I’m sure they’re ok. As for me… Well. I don’t know. But I’m NOT going back home. Maybe I can live with Snorpy and Chandlo after the snax wear off.
(Before Liz and Egg went missing) What she did with everyone when she would hang out with them:
Lizbert- Talked about her adventures before Snaktooth and sometimes went out snak hunting with her, hunting safe snax of course because she’s isn’t great at it.
Eggabell- She would mostly end up talking to Eggabell because of how many times she went into the medical hut because she injured herself somehow. But when she’s not in the hut because of an injury they would just chat about random things.
Filbo- They would walk around Snaxburg together chatting about different things and also saying hi to everyone else as they walked.
Wambus- Would help out around the farm or just talk about plants and other things.
Beffica- Beffica would mostly talk to Distiny about the grumps secrets whilst playing with her hair. But Distiny would successfully change the subject about literally anything else.
Floofty- She would help them out with their experiments, as long as it wasn’t them injuring themself in some way. But they get along just fine.
Gramble- They would play with snax and Distiny would stim a lot whilst doing it cause of how happy it makes her. So a lot of hand flappys and hand tappys and because of the snax she would copy the noises and it would turn into a “who can do the best bugsnak impression” competition.
Wiggle- Wiggle knows Distiny can sing but she’s too shy too so she will try and get her to sing. Sometimes she would sing quietly whilst Wiggle played her banjo and sang the song with her. Or Distiny would play one of Wiggle’s acoustic guitars and Wiggle would sing.
Triffany- Distiny would sit and listen to a Triffany talk about Snaktooth’s history and the desert grumps, whilst swinging her legs cause she does that whenever she listens to someone talk whilst sitting down. Triffany finds adorable.
Cromdo- They would start talking nicely but then they would start getting annoyed about each others voices. When they would get along though they would talk about Cromdo’s schemes and how Distiny would prank her bullies.
Chandlo- They would work out together, play basketball and talk about their crushes and what their lives were like when they were younger. Distiny would lie most of the time though.
Snorpy- They would come up with theories and share them with each other. Distiny would sometimes tease Snorpy (in a friendly way) about him liking Chandlo and not telling him.
Shelda- Distiny would sometimes go and meditate with her and talk about stuff. She, unlike everyone else, actually understands what Shelda says.
This is my official Grumpsona, I’ve already done a drawing of what she looks like in the previous post.
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twenytwenytwo · 2 years
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Nov 9 2022
Quick details: The Volvo is alive again. My sleep pattern these days seems to be sleep 4 hours straight, then hour by hour for the next 4. Anxiety low-zero, mostly zero though. I don’t think about anxiety all day basically, but sometimes am unrelaxed, unfocused.
I feel, as I’m sure others do, like I have to get my “shit together”. Like I gotta figure it all out, get my life in perfect order before I can allow myself to relax. I feel like I have to gaze over each department of my life, and feel “Yeah!!” otherwise something is off, like a barely crooked picture on the wall, irritating you from afar.
Perfect order to me would be a combination of feelings and circumstances.
1. I’d have a band of guys I love hanging out with; good friends basically, who I make great music with that is tight and dangerous.
2. A job that is well paying and not taxing on my mind. I still feel attracted to blue collar sorta jobs, despite embarking on the videography journey. I like doing video, I just wish there was no aspect of it that encouraged me to be cool or the best, that sorta vibe. Chimney sweeping sounds simple, kinda fun, and like it doesn’t matter in this relaxing way. Nobody cares, nobody is tryna be cool and getting the head in a knot.
3. A sexy girl who is crazy about me, and I’m crazy about her. I want to fuck. I want to have fun and relax together. Have kids and a home. A grassy property with a studio, some ocean, firewood, chickens n shit. Maybe have some like minded neighbours, who can come over and jam, or sit around the fire in the eve.
Feelings would be excitement, discovery, enjoyment, satisfaction. Potentially vague there, yeah, but oh well.
These are things that make me perceive life more fondly, make me feel like I am winning, and thus put me in a generally better mood where I’m focused on things I like.
“The hardest thing to do in life is focus on your dreams, the easiest thing to do is complain.”
Perhaps all this time spent philosophizing, going for endless walks, trying to articulate my thoughts is just another form of complaining. I’m focused on what’s wrong and not on what I want to/should be doing, like when you’re complaining.
The best thing I can say, while I continuously go off into tangents, is that all that comes into your life should be accepting your invitation. I feel like I’ve forced things into being in my life so far, coerced, tricked, deceived, to get my preference. Why is that bad? Because it’s unenjoyable, anxiety encouraging. In fact, the place that approach comes from is anxiety, and ultimately fear, fear that unless we muscle things, things won’t go our way. It lacks imagination and confidence. If a circumstance is to be, trying to force it to persist longer than it wants to is exhausting and sucks the colour from life. Nothing should take muscle, or coercion, otherwise you will not enjoy because that process takes all your energy.
I’ve learned this in my relationship with Ethan, and my relationship with Izabel. I used muscle to preserve them, which simply postponed the inevitable, and made me anxious and fearful. The anxieties of this past year were all about the immense pressure I put on this circumstances to give me everything I wanted, and secretly thought that losing them would be catastrophic. Ultimately, I lost them, and lived out that mental catastrophe, unaware of what psychological processes were unravelling within me, unaware of what I had been sowing, and now reaping. I was so anxious to be a success, in the vague sense.
- interupted
Tangent: The powerful human desires are like beasts who can be put to work. If they have no task, no ultimate goal, no hamster wheel to run in, no load to pull, they get annoying to experience, because they are roaming the woods looking for something rip apart out of boredom.
Tangent: The desire to be famous, or just kinda huge and superior, “wow they’re so ____, I wanna be like them, and be friends” is the desire to feel like you’re part of a community that values you. To have a role that those around you respect and value, and to feel like (as a result) people wouldn’t hesitate to talk to you, or think fondly of you, or invite to their party or whatever. The desire for fame, cultural significance, is a desire for safety and love from your fellow humans, to be part of something beautiful and life enriching. To celebrate life together and laugh without a doubt. Why are we so bad at identifying that? Perhaps it’s a result of increasing atomization in the world my generation grew up in, rise of useless roles, cubicles, and that cultural icons best illustrated the feeling of value, connection, and celebration of community and wonder. Why is it that we want to achieve that through fame? Perhaps because there’s no way to really “get” friendship, whereas you can (not really tho) “get” fame. It’s a singular checkpoint in the mind whereas friendship is a constantly changing thing, without a clear checkpoint, or point of “got it!”.
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