#i kinda expect bad things to happen now

[anonymouslyel]

kinda hilarious (its not) that the world waits for me to save some money until it gives me problems for my saved money to be used like thanks a bunch (angrily and sarcastically)

#vent post #personal #i post *bow* #this is why i get kinda scared whenever i save some significant money #goddamn #what kind of problem will this world give me #i kinda expect bad things to happen now #its not even the kind of problem where there'll be some money left if i use it for the said problem #its the kind of problem where all my saved money will be used #cant even buy myself a fucking fancy drink or a good book #what the hell

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Qualifiying - Fernando Alonso

#half asleep making these istg #yayyyy p9? idk ig i expected him to do better #old man asleep at the wheel whats new 😴 #he was very quick w this interview i wonder if he was eager to get to bed #i certainly am rn #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #2023 las vegas gp #(i wish i could atop feeling insecure abt my gifs. i do it for fun.) #(of course i want them to look somewhat good but i get a bit ill over it) #(there was somw drama on here at some point that made me want to completely stop posting then ngl) #(cause like what is the point if im not as good as others ig :/ this is kinda vague posting but it made me so uncomfortable) #(as i said. i do it for fun in quick time bcs yay jsut wanna post smth i found cute) #(but ever sincce that thing happened its just made me extremely self critical and insecure abt posting) #(idk why im saying this. kinda repressing the urge tk be like 'SRY THESE ARE TERRIBLE. YEAH.') #(i need to sleep. but i often feel like this literally every time i post now bcs some people get on their high horse and ruin people's fun) #(iykyk ig. its smth bothering me lately. but i hate to act so morose. but i still feel bad abt the quality sometimes. i guess.) #we do a little bit of f1

[give-grian-rights]

can someone tell me why im being abnormal about a character i've barely touched the content of. like yay yippie i watched like 20 hours of you. there's fucking 80 years of content get me OUT OF HERE?

#yeah this is about nightwing. yes im a freak about him no i don't do well with comics #shout out to duke thomas in the we are robin comic i've had in my browser tabs for three weeks now #sorry king. #i mean i guess it makes sense because theres So many characters in media that you can't even get 20 hours out of . but. BUT ITS NOT FAIR. #i want to read comics so bad. i try to. i have. i've started several #blue beetle 2009 nightwing 2016... superman & batman world's finest #i was able to finish teen titans world's finest but that was only. like. six issues #comics as a medium just has this thing where. you're dropped in and it kinda expects you to know what's happening #and leaves you feeling like you started on the wrong page. like blue beetle. loved you but man that was not the greatest first comic to rea #wait i forgot i read hawkeye 2011(?) and that also had the same issue. but more so each installment like #felt like it was starting on a point AFTER something happened like i was meant to be reading another comic before i got to that issue. #i got. like. idk 18? 19? comics into that one. and 12 into nightwing. nightwing wasn't as bad but it just. gah. like several-issue long #stories carried across batman and nightwing and its like.OUGH. #i know im mutuals with a comic person. hi. i know you're cringing. #there are so many good characters to come out of comics. its just SO HARD to get into. #rn i dont have an excuse with We Are Robin. just that i've been infected with needing to play the sims for 8 hours a day. #mika-posts

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Lord of the Empty Isles

sci-fi/fantasy

set on a supposedly utopian planet recovering from a climate crisis, where bonds between people are able to be seen and manipulated (by some people)

follows a young man whose brother was cursed and killed by an infamous outlaw 5 years ago, and he’s finally able to curse him back - but it rebounds, as he’s somehow fatebound to the outlaw

to find a cure and save them both they have to team up, and he quickly finds out that the resources the outlaw is stealing go to the thousands of people neglected on prison planets, and he has to go against what he thought was right to help them

no romance, aroace MC, focus on platonic relationships

arc from netgalley, out june 6

#Lord of the Empty Isles #aroaessidhe 2024 reads #I enjoyed this quite a bit! But I think it could have gone a bit further in places. #It has some interesting concepts and a great cast of characters and yay no romance #I do have a lot of thoughts and little critiques... #it's p obvious where the plot is going and what's going to happen #There’s clearly a lot gone into developing this bond system but to be honest I still don’t entirely get it? #It seems to emphasise that the bonds just reflect connections between people rather than predetermine anything; but also the plot kind of #hinges on Remy and Idrian having a predetermined bond? There are a lot of explanations of intricacies but a lot of it didn’t sink in idk #It’s promoted as QP but to me it reads as a general platonic relationship. I generally expect a depiction of a QPR to have like.. #some form of acknowledgement/depiction of the form of their relationship being a particular (undefinable?) kind #with some specific level of commitment? I’m being picky maybe they mean queerplatonic themes/vibes rather than saying it’s a qpr #specifically. the centred platonic relationship is good! it doesn't seem like a qpr to me; at most what could one day be that #also things are solved quite quickly and easily in the end - both the curse and the downfall of the bad guy. #I feared it would go down the route of blaming things on the person in charge rather than emphasising systemic issues which it kinda does…. #It’s impossible to ignore right now just how deeply people are willing to believe dehumanising propaganda - and how 'telling the truth' #and exposing the person in power as bad doesn’t actually do anything so that happening here made me go…… oh okay. well. #there is room for a sequel that maybe will explore this tho. idk #complaints aside - I do recommend this! It was fun and pretty unique. #aroace books #no romance

[deus-ex-mona]

happy 828 days of honeypre!!!!!!!!!

#i totally didn’t make this with my own account in mind (<- can’t fill in 2 squares anyway) #farewell honeypre you will be missed (esp kohachi </3) #but hey that means i now have more time to play other games. sweeeeeeeeeeet~ #speaking of games… i’m almost done with the 3rd sem palace of p5r but i have no sense of direction/map reading skills :(((( #so i can’t get through the darned twilight corridor and i!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #free me pls my copy of nirvana initiative came in today and i wanna play it soooo bad but i!!!! auauauauaauauauuuuu #speaking of ni though… it’s been sooo long since i last played the og game that i don’t remember that much about what had happened? sads #the figurine that came with the game was much bigger than expected though… so that’s kinda lit lmaooo #hmmmm sorry my thoughts seem to have gotten away from me again lol. anyways byebye honeypre you will be missed #just honeypre things

[shrekshugebadussy]

haven’t heard from my dad at all today… very interesting…

#happy birthday to me 🙃 #kinda surprisingly kinda not i also haven’t heard from my aunt #but at least my coworker and boss can actually get me a card and even some gifts even tho i never expected them to #idec about cards anymore bcuz ik they expensive af now #but at least a text would’ve been nice #ik there was a couple times i didn’t text ppl on bdays until 7 or 8pm so like i get it if they text late due to a busy day or whatever #but like #with everything that’s happened with my dad #he’s just being petty #a child #cuz sometimes i’m all for being petty but over this?? he’s a child #i mean it’s 9:30pm so there’s still time on the day ig idk #just bummed out ig #kinda wanna cry #i’ve been a bit of a bad headspace lately idk i just feel off #depressed 🤪 actually #but anyways #i had a wonderful bday tho! #my mom and brother got me wonderful things and i went over to see my grandma 🥺 #mine

[running-in-the-dark]

went somewhere with my husband and his dad today (to pick up my in-laws' "new" camper van). the guys that were selling it had a baby with them and it was so freaking adorable. so I kept making silly faces and hiding for a few seconds and that kind of stuff to make the baby laugh (it was fun!). anyway, after a while one of the guys asked when my husband and I are having kids and I just went like oh never. we have two cats, that's enough, and most babies aren't as cute as that one anyway so nope not interested in that.

#there's a possibility with the way that the initial question was phrased that he might have thought I was pregnant #nah dude I'm just fat #but I just ignored that possibility and it was fine! #I don't think I've ever had anyone outright assume that I'm pregnant and I would have expected it to feel really bad #but it was just fine! I'm fat and my stomach is big and I look like a woman and apparently playing with a baby means you want kids so I can #kinda see the logic #and anyway it was ambivalent enough that he might really just have meant it in general #they were really nice so I'm just going to assume that :) #I think I would have handled that totally differently before (mostly before the anxiety meds really) #it would have felt awful then - just the thought that he MIGHT have meant that #and now it's just a funny thing that happened and that I feel completely okay about :) #(and that baby really was ridiculously adorable! I don't like babies in general but ugh it was so cute) #also I think I handled like the whole day really really well!! I suggested things and asked questions and didn't feel uncomfortable at any #point!! #we went to McDonald's and that's something that was completely overwhelming for me before #now... I didn't even think about it!! we just went there! we went inside I did a lot of things that would have been hard before and it was #just fine! #I just felt like. I'm allowed to exist. I'm allowed to be here. I'm not in the way I'm not wrong I'm not bad #it all just happened and there was no anxiety no panic no awful thoughts. I wasn't afraid at any point. not even a little. #(I think. it's hard to remember now but I think that's a good sign too!) #personal #anxiety meds my beloved

[klonoadoortophantomile]

oh yeah uh i took a nap i kinda feel better now so thats nice ig

#i want a hotdog so bad rn #making one but idk if itll taste any good #i feel weird my limbs are all kinda wombly and things feel like? foggy ? this happens sometimes tho so itll probably go away #i didnt expect to be asleep for so longi was only gonna nap for like an hour and now uh three hours have passed i think #wait wtf my 5th hour would be ending rn. im gonna have so much shit to catch up with arghaghh #inquisitivewaltz.txt

[catboyolli]

⭐

#vent post #i had a terrible day at work today but someone just messaged me via teams to tell me that he and the team are very grateful for my help 🥺 #and now i'm crying of course lol #i've been having a bad time thanks to a new hire in the team that doesn't have any manners and thinks i'm a chatbot instead of a coworker #i gave the trainings and i'm the main point of contact whenever he has any questions (very often which is expected as he sets in the role) #but sometimes he doesn't even say hello or good morning or hi or anything. just the question and expects me to have the answer #and i understand that social stuff and cues are hard (it happens to me as well) but this chatbox treatment makes me feel kinda dehumanized #i would expect it from people from other countries but not from someone from my country like cmon dude 💀 #plus he doesn't have any manners. like today i was looking something up in a db for him and it took me quite a while+ #when i didn't reply for a long time (because i was busy looking up the damn thing) he messages me: 'so?' #like. no buddy just no. but welp it's nice to feel appreciated by someone after being treated like this today 💖💗💕💕 #btw he's just 1 year younger than me so this isn't a kid fresh out of school not in touch with the working environment. this is a man #and probably libertarian 💀

[britneyshakespeare]

You know last week before my night class started I was chatting with this girl who sat across from me and mentioned how I was tired and could really use a cup of coffee and she goes "oh, so I guess coffee is your spirit animal?"

And I was like... no... no not really...

#she recited a few other internet one-liners to graze over it but it was weird #text post #tales from diana #not that these are at all comparable bc they're very different in nature but #kaily and i were having a conversation yesterday abt how it feels all the sudden as a white person when another white friend suddenly drops #like the ironic n-word in front of you out of nowhere. probably just to be funny most of the time. #im always like. HUH???? DO YOU EXPECT ME TO LAUGH RIGHT NOW???? #i call it out as gross but it's always unexpected and disappointing. #like not only would you use that word so brazenly. but you expect me to giggle nd laugh along and validate it? NOT the case whatsoever dude #the spirit animal thing is a different form of casual racism bc a lot of ppl don't truly know wtf a spirit animal is #they just think the words sound funny together. it's a form of hyperbole to say x is your spirit animal #especially if it's not an animal??? #remember when directioners would always joke niall was their spirit animal... *shivers* #to get back to the n word thing briefly bc i had one more thing to say #one of my friends i made recently had to drop a lot of toxic cishet white guy friends #she's a black queer latina immigrant who kinda had a tendency to want to befriend ppl she was afraid could hurt her #i didn't see this happen in front of me. but apparently they'd drop casual n words EVEN W THE HARD R in front of her and like #look to her for approval?!?!?!?!? #and she told me 'i feel bad bc they probably don't know better' (& she was naturally also very afraid of seeming 'angry' @ them) #& i was like. oh no girl. like. there's a lot of shit white guys don't know & won't teach themselves #like a lot a lot. that's not one of them though. #even if you're a white kid who grew up in a 97% white suburb (like me) you heard growing up not to use that word bc it's offensive #men who are like 30 years old and working in a multicultural educational system heavily frequented by immigrants... they SHOULD know better #that they somehow don't is embarrassing AT BEST but i know those guys & they're actually racist #that was a few months ago though since she dropped them (it was their own fault... i didn't tell her what to do but they caused this drama) #(no need to explain but someone was a COMPLETE jerk and ran away w no apologies... fuck that guy) #ive really enjoyed getting to know her and the other night she sent me a message abt how she really feels loved and accepted #by me :) and kaily and a few other ppl ive introduced her to. she's had a terrible history w friendships & relationships in this country #that made me feel very warm bc i really do love her she's a fun person to be around and talk to. we have a lot of common interests #yeah. rant turns to wholesome story in the tags to start your morning.

[galacticlamps]

gotta say, while I don’t love the fact that I’ve been especially busy & stressed out with work & irl stuff lately, I did pick a good time for it with all this new doctor who news - bc I know I’ve only had the chance to see a tiny fraction of all the reactions to it so far, and frankly I’m already kinda tired of hearing it all - even for the stuff I like/think I’ll like! it’s also great for helping me keep my mouth shut bc I do have a lot of thoughts, but probably none that I’d feel confident expressing clearly without writing a much longer post than i have the time & energy to make

#honestly the only take i can put simply is this: #im so tired of this trend of announcing stuff super early #it was one of my 2 immediate reactions when they announced rtd a few months ago #& it's absolutely my feeling now #i get announcing ncuti bc logically we're expecting to get a little cameo of him within a few months #but the rest? #that's all over a year & a half away as far as anyone can tell! #what on god's green earth would make anyone want to know these things this far out? #and i dont at all mean that from an 'oooh no spoilers' perspective - kinda the exact opposite #in that i find it difficult/pointless to form any strong opinions good bad or neutral without seeing the actual product #so like all the talk that is gonna happen/is already happening based on announcements and not even trailers or little bits of content... #im like what's the point on a good day and can we please stop pretending we know more than we do on a bad day #basically im not looking forward to sitting thru months of debate/discourse/speculation whatever you want to call it #before we even have actual new content to actually react to #(also im worried that if i see one more cryptic little emoji tweet my eyes will roll so far back into my skull they'll get stuck) #(but at least i have the decency to admit that that's a me problem) #(although on a realer level im not actually thrilled about the way those starting with ncuti and now being used for everything #make every new announcement feel like it is/will be/should be of the same level of news/importance as the new doctor) #ugh see even this is closer to Getting Into It than i wanted to do #it's a good thing I don't have much time for this webbed site rn

[sevenstevearmy]

... Guess who learned about cluttering and disorganized speech today... Guess who was struggling with those symptoms this whole time... Guess who has comorbid disorders... Guess who's not happy about learning new things about themself...

#like now i have words i can use about it but... i was really hoping it would be something easier to fix #on top of that i also stutter but we already knew that #and they get worse with stress but speaking makes me stressed in general bc i'm selectively mute but i make myself talk more than feels ok #bc people expect me to speak and are not very accepting of the fact that today's best may not be the same as tomorrow's and sometimes #tomorrow's will be worse. and that's not fair at all. #plus on the stress thing i have really bad anxiety in general so like... i'm never going to speak good in my life it feels like #and the worst is when people think it's funny bc like... it is kinda funny when i'm trying to talk sometimes but if they could not try to #make me do it again thanks it's really upsetting actually. and they don't mean anything by it but that doesn't erase the fact that i just #can't get excited around them bc that's usually when it happens and then i'm not excited any more

[mothslimes]

sometimes i think girls who wear a full face of makeup every day and get lip fillers and other surgeries n shit. just forgot what an actual woman looks like. actually post cancelled I think so much of the world has forgotten what an actual woman looks like. genuinely can't imagine waking up every day looking in the mirror and feeling like i have to paint my face to be presentable. fucking terrifying man.

if you look at what women are trending it's so weird how many of them look exactly the same. same hair style, same makeup style, same outfits. and it's not just celebrities, i sit in class and the girls are all carbon copies. even have the same style of taking notes. pretty much all appear to be thinking the same way, even. what the fuck. those 2010 cheesy illustrations of a bunch of identical looking blond Barbies were right maybe

#mik talks #and I guess it's not even on the girls themselves since they're fed fuckin garbage by the algorithm #tho I won't take too much pity on them.because many of them are giant bullies who love feeling superior to me #I'm just like. god I'm so glad I'm too autistic so I never even got the chance to try and fit in #so now I feel no pressure to do so #I said this exact thing before but I feel like the world kinda needs to stop throwing huge pity parties for conventionally attractive #white women who happen to feel pressure to keep up certain things about their appearance #yeah that must suck but you get to fit in you get to hide in the masses lol. wow that must be so hard to have to make #certain choices in order not to be bullied. some of us don't even have the choice #blablabla These women are excellent in upholding the patriarchy and white supremacy btw even if they themselves #have progressive views. anyway #No more politics I'm tired also I'm too stupid to make good conclusions about this #I'm really just complaining about the type.of.girls who bullied me #I'll forever and ever support nlogs #idc. you ARENT like other girls and that's a fucking challenge and you're allowed to feel proud of who you are #and going against societal norms #ur allowed to find joy in that #maybe just tone it down a little and focus more on what's good about you vs what's bad about them #but its not bad as a vent??? like??? you're allowed to be pissed abt it man #no one should expect a flawless deconstruction of misogyny in a 2 panel comic istg #sometimes u just wanna express something god it's so misogynistic when all these men on YouTube make videos ridiculing #'pickmes' and 'nlogs' hey maybe stay in your lane you never experienced growing up a girl ostracized by the female populus at school #it IS just like in mean girls #anyway I love women being feral and human and we need more of that instead of expecting women to keep a perfect face and perfect body #women SWEAT and PISS and thats okay :))) they're animals #this is the most 2014 ass post I've made sorry #also the least 'cisgender bisexual man' post I've made #the stealth transness leaving my body when its time to critique hierarchical structures within female spaces from the lense of a girl that #was left out of them

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#looking at the notes ppl in the lab let me on my birthday card. it seems ppl think i should chill the fuck out lmao #a lot were like RELAX!!! and ya kno objectively theyre right but i refuse to listen bc theres something wrong in my head #sigh. i survived the day at least. the timed measurements r done on this experiment. thank christ. and my birthday gathering as so #i dont kno. it was kinda funny and kinda sad i guess. bc i knew it was gonna happen and i didnt want it to but i was like fine. ill meet #at 4. and i expected it to b in the conference room but they set up outside the lab around the corner. so they did kinda surprise me #location wise i guess. i cant imagine what expression i was making. it felt like a pained smile but idk. i had to go back to take #measurements every 4min so i was standing there with a plate full of ice creame cake. kinda away from everyone while they talked. staring #at my phone timer as it ticked down and abruptly leaving when i had to log a measurement. i was basically a non entity while there. which #was kinda idea bc i have too much hurt inside to talk to ppl right now. as evidence by my phone call with my parents when i got home. im #just kinda a bummer to exist around rn. idk maybe i should apologize to my boss bc i kno im not an easy person to do things for #and i really do appreciate the effort. its just hard when i kno how much stress its going to cause me for someone to attempt to do #something they think will b nice. so idk i just feel bad. but its over. and idk what ill do tomorrow. i should do stuff for when i move #like my dad was like: u should prioritize ur future stuff. and hes objectively right. they think i should get a studio apartment which #would b expensive as fuck but i will destroy myself if i have roommates. idk. theres lots still to do bc i have to get a ton of data #processed by the end of the week bc i have 8 days of measurement on another project that needs to get done by may 14th when i leave for #vacation. which my mom was like did u buy ur tickets for next month and i was like. hm how do i ask where im supposed to buy tickets to #without giving away that i dont kno what ur talking abt? bc apparently im going to a wedding? wtf do i wear to a wedding? #idk. i guess im just kinda sad bc this month has been really hard. i made it hard for no reason bc theres something wrong in my head and #that hurt has nowhere to go bc i cant even give anyone an honest account of how awful it was bc its like what r they gonna do abt it? #anything i say is just worrying bc i cant seem to stop myself who whats the point in talking abt it. but idk humans r social creatures so #when im in pain at least part of me wants someone to brush my hair and acknowledge my pain and tell me itll b ok #but idk. the idea of that happening is different from the reality where i seem to opperate at a different frequency to other people. we #just dont seem to properly connect. idk. idk what ill do tomorrow. im afraid to loosen my grip on my schedule bc i might fall to piece #pieces without the pressure. well see. lets home my 26th year is better than my 25th was. bc last year sucked #hope* lets hope that was my low point. bc that was not a fun time and im worry to take account of thr damage done #unrelated

[feline-evil]

So the mtl s2 finale really grabbed me by the bawls full force goddamn

#jay talkin #im NOT putting this in the tag godbless but that shit had me screaming all caps at my bf every five seconds #holy shit???? holy shit??? #what the fuck do you mean we're getting all this. this ep was abt the band trying to suck their own dicks #and now its everyone working and fighting together and???? i wasnt expecting this!!! #LIKE. this show is jokes its so not serious so it suddenly delivering a rlly compelling setpiece w drama that felt like it had heart had me #it HAD me. it had me REAL GOOD. holy shit. I JUST PUT THIS SHOW ON FOR SMTH SILLY TO WATCH #DURING A BAD WEEK. CUZ PPL I RESPECT LIKED IT AND I WANTED TO SEE WHAT WAS UP. NOW IT HAS ME BY THE DICKENBALLS #I DIDNT EXPECT TO GET THIS INVESTED. I THOUGHT IT'D JUST BE JAPES #istg the same thing happend w always sunny i started watching it cuz i needed smth funny and kinda mindless #and then the mac episode. YOU KNOW TYHE ONE. W THE DANCE. HAPPENED. AND I WENT OH HOLY SHIT. GODDAMN. FUCK!!!! #snifls and looks at everyone so sopping wet. sorry for the man i become when my brain latches onto smth new. #this time it was an adult cartoon from 2006 so everyone batten down the hatches jays not gonna be normal abt these idiot men ever again

[angryborzois]

ngl another part i miss about my old school was how interesting every day was

#angryborzois rambles #like okay weird people aside #i liked how every day was always a little different #i still remember the time i was playfighting my classmate instead of doing a class assignment and I ended up with a gash across my finger #i think we were fighting over (or with) a metal ruler like dumbasses #and at one point he tried to take it from me and i tightly grabbed onto it even though i shouldve let go (my dumb ass was being cocky alr) #and he pulled it back really hard because he didnt expect me to actually hold on and that ended up cutting me #and everyone looked horrified because the gash looked bad #the dude felt bad and i had to remind him it was ok because i didnt care too much LMAO #that was fun bro (i still have a faint scar tho LMFAOOO) #i also miss hopping the school gate and barely making it back to class before it started #also i loved eating cup noodles on a cold day and just enjoying it outside oughvvnh that was so good #also i loved how the most randomest things always happened #like the time my classmate broke the window blinds and it fell on me #i feel like now that im in a normal hs #nothing happens #everythings the same old same old #kinda sad #i miss playfighting a bunch of people instead of doing work #i wouldnt go back to that school tho