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hunnylagoon · 3 months

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The Killing Moon

PT2 The Colour Wars

Ellie Williams x Reader

It’s the perfect night for mystery and horror. The night itself is filled with monsters.

Premise: Summer camp feels a little different. Could it be newfound feelings for your friend or creatures beyond the imagination stalking you? Either way, it’s time to win the Colour Wars.

Warnings: Raunchy humour / mentions of cryptids / creepy?

PART ONE: Camp Spirit

Hope everything is alright with you because I'm so stressed that I may be spiralling into insanity at any moment. I understand that I'm an adult now but I too need someone to scream my frustration to until my lungs burn and I'm light-headed. "Hey, I'm having like super bad cramps and my flow is super heavy so I can't play this game."

I look at the girl in front of me, she's around fourteen if I had to guess and has two blonde French braids. We were in the middle of the first game of colour wars -the treasure hunt- and this girl was sporting a blue shirt, I didn't know her face nor was she on my team and I hadn't even noticed that she had been tagging along with my group for ten minutes. "Who are you?"

"Laila."

"Why are you here?" I ask but Laila only answers me with a shrug and a sneer "Never mind, I'm not your counsellor and I don't care, go to the nurses."

"Can I go to the nurses too?" Olive peeps up behind me "I think I have a scrape on my knee.":

"Don't we all?" I look back at her "We gotta win this game, we're so close," We were, mostly because every time the blue team gathered treasure I would send out feral kids to ambush them and bring it back to me "We're gonna have all the treasure we can carry." The objective was simple; The directors hid treasure (Cheap jewelry, hats, clothes from the old theatre program, etc.) across campgrounds and we had to source it out, whichever team came back to the sports field with more treasure won.

"We've been out here for hours," Morgan groaned, you'd think that these girls had been sent to war with the way they complained.

"It's only been forty-six minutes."

Olive took a seat on a rock, Leah doing the same, it didn't take long for each girl to have firmly planted themselves on the ground and refuse to get up. Valentina grabbed a stick and began to scratch drawings into the muddy ground.

"C'mon guys, there's like fifteen minutes left, and I know for a fact that there is still treasure to be found." I know how ridiculous I must've looked at that moment, I had been wearing a purple 'royal cape' that was pilling onto my T-shirt and a cheap dollar store crown that kept slipping off my head.

"I'm so bored," Chloe drew out.

"Because you're being boring!" I exasperate. Never had I ever had a cabin that was so apathetic and unenthusiastic, they were a stark contrast to last year when everyone had sunshine running through their veins and mud smeared across their faces; those pitch black summer nights live in my bones.

"This isn't fun, can we play something else?"

"No," I take a deep breath out, composing myself "You are at summer camp to be outdoors, you're developing important social, cognitive and emotional skills."

I'm met with blank stares from each and every girl sitting below me "I don't know what that means," Leslie said.

"It means we're going through puberty," Kim tells her.

"No," My eyes go wide "No, it means that you're figuring out who you are."

"Am I gonna get my period soon?" Valentina drops the stick from her tiny hands.

"Maybe- I don't know," I thew my hands out.

"What's a period?"

"It's where you bleed until you don't have any blood left and then you die," Kim says this so matter-of-factly like she has a degree in healthcare and has been teaching the health unit in PE for a decade.

"WHAT?" Chloe jumps up from her spot on the ground, looking around to see if she's already bleeding out.

"We're gonna die and you didn't tell us?" Leslie looks even more terrified than she did on the night of the camp legend.

Every girl was beginning to panic, fear was clear across their small faces. It's moments like these where I wish I was alone, maybe solo camping or back in my bedroom from high school, somewhere where only the moon knows how I rot and the sun knows how I yearn.

"Guys, calm down, a period isn't a bad thing and it won't hurt you," This was my attempt to soothe the ten-year-old girls who were contemplating how they would spend their last days on earth. The plastic crown slips off my head and I reach down to grab it and readjust it.

"Then why is it called a period if it doesn't end your life?" Kim asks, crossing her arms.

"I don't know but it doesn't end your life-

"Can we just go back to the soccer field until this game is over?" Tamar chimes in, looking like she rather be staring at cardboard boxes.

"Fine!" I finally gave in, gathering all of the treasure that once sat at my feet into my arms. The amount of treasure was almost overflowing, I had stolen a bunch from some kids in Dean's cabin who were too scared to argue with me.

"Am I going to die?" Leslie scurries up beside me and I look down at her, behind the thick lenses of her classes, she is holding back tears.

"Not for a very long time," I can hardly bend my neck to look at her with the amount of shit I'm hauling, the girls being little to no help with this. The girls trail behind me and I have to turn my entire body to look at them "If anyone runs off this time, I'm feeding them to the snatchers."

Suddenly they want to listen. The woods aren't scary in the day, just at night when they begin to whisper. As of now, I know the quickest way to every part of camp despite the identical trees so thick that you can hardly see the sky when you're beneath them.

Leslie holds onto the bottom of my red Colour Wars T-shirt since my hands are full, Valentina holds onto Leslie's hand and all of a sudden I've become a mother hen with little chicks following me around.

"If magic isn't real then why were people so scared of witches," Valentina asks me while she kicks a rock across matted fallen leaves and dirt.

"Maybe magic is real," I say "To burn a witch is to admit magic exists."

"How do I become a witch?" Chloe appears out of what seems to be thin air on my other side, I can't see her since my pile of goodies is up to my chin and I'm afraid that if I move all of it will come tumbling down.

"Practice magic," That was my guess, I didn't know squat about witchcraft.

"How do I do that?"

"A real witch will figure it out herself," I say. When you've worked with kids for five years, you get to a certain point where you run out of creative answers. During my first year working here, I was sixteen and a CIT, terribly afraid to mess up because I hadn't lived yet. With each passing year that I've come back, I get more and more comfortable, returning to familiar faces and the smell of petrichor.

Chloe nods excessively like I've just said something extremely profound, I can see the gears turning in her head like she's already thinking of spells to cast.

It takes a little less than five minutes until we're out of the woods, we emerge by the crafts cabin, the soccer field is in clear sight. The soccer field is built over a little mound, slightly elevated from the ground and on top I can see two piles of knick knacks and a pretty big sum of campers and counsellors alike waiting on the top.

From the looks of it Tommy and Joel have already begun to count their respective teams mound of treasure, Tommy being on the amazing red team and Joel representing the awful/disgusting/foul/boring/untalented blue team. That might've been a stretch but there were no friends in the Colour Wars.

In what seems to be the blink of an eye a hoard of kids runs past me and my girls, nearly knocking me off my feet. I didn't even process that some boys with too much energy had stolen plyed my well earned (stolen) treasure from my arms leaving me with nothing but my cape and crown until Liza, a girl from the Grizzly cabin snatched the cape right off my back and none other than Ellie herself grabbing the crown off my head.

They were booking it to the soccer field "Go get our shit back!" I yelled ushering my girls to go after the kids who were at least three years older than them. Only two of them actually listened; despite how hard they were trying, Leslie and Chloe's stumpy legs couldn't take them very far, leaving me to be the only one in pursuit.

I summoned back all of my memory from playing rugby in highschool and jumped on Ellie's back, I didn't take her down but she stumbled. I was so desperate to not turn up empty handed. By the time I made contact with her, she had already thrown the crown ahead for Liza to catch. They ran up the soccer field, dumping the double stolen treasure into their hula hoop. Even visually they were in the lead now, thanks to my expert piracy skills and theirs too, I guess.

"I hate you," I slid off Ellie's back, my sneakers hitting the dusty ground. "My girls earned that fair and square."

She looks me up and down, bathing in my anger like some kind of prize "I know you stole it."

"How?"

"Because I know you."

"Oh yeah?" I cross my arms, taking a step closer to my friend "Do you know how I'm gonna kick your ass later?"

She grins "I look forward to it." Ellie leaves me with this while she walks up to the soccer field to revel with her team in their newfound victory.

"What does 'kick your ass' mean?" Olive padded up behind me along with the rest of the girls, except for Leslie who was bent over, one hand on her knee to support her while she clung to her inhaler for dear life. "Are you gonna beat Ellie up?"

"I think she means 'kiss her ass'." Kim said, turning her head to look at Olive "Like they're gonna have sex later."

"What's sex?" Chloe furrowed her eyebrows.

"Kim you need to stop talking," I tell them, hands on my hips, nothing but frustration etched into the forefront of my brain. I glance back at Ellie as Maria rings the bell to signal that the game was over. Softly, with hands gentle as rain, I will wrap my hands around her neck and strangle her.

"Listen up!" I announced to the eight girls in my cabin. To absolutely no surprise, blue won the treasure hunt, now we were setting up for a water balloon fight in the allotted section of woods that Joel taped off in bright pink flagging tape. "I physically and mentally cannot handle another loss, I will be very disappointed in each and every one of you if we don't win-

"That's not true," Daniel cuts me off "The point of today is to have fun, winning doesn't matter, just do your best." The both of us are standing tall on a rock while the campers sit around and stare up at the two of us like we had been mighty gods preparing to throw wine and bread at their little feet.

I eye Daniel from the side and look back to everyone "None of your hard work is going to matter unless you win so do you want to be a whiney loser like Daniel or be cool like me and win the colour wars?"

Everyone fell quiet for a moment as if a curse of silence fell upon us until Kim not-so-sublty yelled "Daniel's a pussy!" I was beyond the point where I cared about the girls cussing, the only thing on my mind was showing my very dear friend, Ellie how awful her team is and rub my win in her beautiful face.

"That's what I like to hear!" I smile "Now let's go win this!"

My girls erupt in cheers and Daniel almost shamefully steps off the rock. I had finally made a breakthrough with my cabin after slightly snapping at them after Maria announced that the red team lost. Maybe the treasure hunt wasn't my thing, but water balloon wars? I had won that every single year, even when I was still a camper.

The objective was easy, be the last team with players, once you get hit you're out. Friendly fire is strictly against the rules as well as headshots, they had to be hit in the torso, once you get wet, you're out and have to leave the allotted zone to watch.

We played in a patch of forest that was less dense than the rest, making it easier to run around.

"Three!" Maria shouted, "Two!" She's standing in the middle of the zone, so everyone can hear her though no one can see her since the two teams are on opposite ends to make it fair. "One!" She blows her whistle and kids are already dunking their hands into buckets of icy-cold water balloons and setting off to the enemy end.

The CITs were responsible for keeping a consistent flow of water balloons and buckets spread evenly in the zone, I remember when I was a CIT and had to miss out on capture the flag to pick up every bit of balloon that at splattered across the ground.

I had a balloon in each hand, making my way around the perimeter discreetly. I lock eyes with a younger boy in a blue shirt, he immediately turns to run, not fast enough though "Come back here ankle biter!" I yell, decking a water balloon at him, it hits him right in his back.

There was a boy in Sawyers's cabin, one of the wild ones with animal teeth that ran off of energy drinks and the huff of Sharpies. He tried to throw a balloon at me but it missed me by a landslide, his second attempt wasn't much better.

I however nailed him in the chest "You're out buddy!" I smiled, and he met this by giving me the middle finger. "Whatever carrot top, tell Sawyer I send word!"

I was way too good at this game. Every year I thought I could take on the other team single-handedly and every year I'm proven right when I'm the last one standing. After a prompt reminder from Joel that this was supposed to be fun for the campers and I was treating it like World War Three, I had to cool down a little bit.

We played this game straight after lunch so everyone was either hopped up with energy or sluggish from eating too much, alternatively, there was Ashlynn. She was wandering around, a black bleach-stained hoodie thrown over the top of the shirt for whatever team she was on.

Ashlynn had a can of Diet Coke in hand, where did she get it? I'm not too sure, my guess is that she stashed them under her bunk. "Hey," She sits on a log beneath the tree I was hiding behind. "You're way better at this than you should be, you know you're playing against children, right?"

"I didn't come here to fuck around," There weren't a whole lot of people left in the game, I just took out Abby and the only counsellor left on the blue team was Ellie, maybe Ashlynn but she didn't pose a threat in any way shape or form.

"Do you have any nic on you?" She looked up at me, taking a sip from her diet coke, her shaggy bleached hair was one more dye away from being fried.

"No?" I furrow my eyebrows "I don't usually bring nicotine to a summer camp full of children."

Ashlynn almost looks like she's hungover but then again she usually seems that way "I brought a couple joints and I'm like ninety percent sure two got stolen."

My eyes widen "You brought joints? Ash, you're getting fired if Maria finds out."

She shrugs "I don't mind, I either smoke weed here or I smoke weed in my backyard."

"Okay but if it actually got stolen then it's probably some little shit that has it, they're gonna say that you gave it to them and that's a whole case."

"It's legalized though."

"Yeah, not for children." I was taken away from the game until I saw the smallest bit of a blue shirt beneath Ashlynn's sweater, I didn't hesitate to drop a balloon on her. She doesn't seem to mind and from this reaction, I'm beginning to think she's the one who smoked those missing joints.

I come out from behind the tree empty-handed and plant a kiss on her forehead as an apology for getting soaking wet "Love you, Ash, hope you find your weed." I tell her before jogging off. Ashlynn doesn't get up to join everyone else outside of the boundary, she just stays on the log and drinks her diet coke.

Dina is still in the game on my team as well as a few campers, I hear her voice yelling at children somewhere off in the distance. Sadly, the girls in my cabin were picked off almost immediately, I swear I will avenge their little souls.

"You're soaking Conner, get out of here," Dina scolded a kid on the blue team "You gotta play by the rules, so beat it shrimp."

"Nuh-uh," He said. Lord knows I hated this kid, last summer when I went to the bathroom during dinner Conner stole my food and denied it even though he was the only one in the mess hall with two plates, he then kicked me in the shins and waddled away.

"You gotta go, baby hippo," I tell him, his round cheeks are bright red from running and he's short-breathed. He shakes his head and with a final stern look from both Dina and I, he leaves. "Nice, who's left?"

"One camper on our team and just Ellie over there," She tells me "Like best case scenario, just go over there and seduce Ellie."

I raise an eyebrow "Nah, I'm winning with brute strength and incredible strategy."

"I'm guessing that going for the little kids first is your definition of incredible strategy?"

"Yup," I say, walking to a bucket to grab another balloon "Get ready, this could go south."

"God forbid we tragically lose our lives in a water balloon war," Sarcasm drips from her tone even though she grabs another balloon.

"I know, that would be awful," I say with full seriousness.

Dina is struck with a water balloon out of nowhere "Shit," She mutters, looking at her now dripping shirt. I don't think I've ever reacted so quickly to anything in my life, I throw a balloon at Ellie and it barely hits her, but it still does.

"Look, you're wet," I smile, brighter than I had this whole summer "You're wet, you lost!" I'm almost jumping around, I'm so unreasonably happy at such a stupid thing. "I won!" I yell trying to capture the attention of the CITs so my win could go on record.

"Fuck yeah!" Dina gives me a high five then looks at Ellie "You lost!"

"You lost," I say in a sing-song voice "Red team wins," I grab Dina's hand and raise to the sky like she's just won a wrestling match "We win, you're all wet!"

"You're wet too, D," Ellie says.

"Yeah, but you lost!" Dina wraps me in a hug around my torso, pinning my arms down and shaking me back and forth.

"Ew, get off," I can't help myself from laughing "But seriously I won, put that on record."

"Wow they have their worst player guarding the flag," I say, we were nearing dinner now and everyone was getting tired out, not me though, I had a war to win. Capture the Flag was the last game and that game is my shit, I know I said that about every other game but I really mean it this time.

"I always forget that you're way too into this," Ellie says, she's unmoving in front of the blue team flag, pole stuck into the ground.

"Ellie, you need to let me win," I say "Or I will do unspeakable things to you."

"Is that a threat or a promise?" She teases.

"Whichever you want," I almost surprised myself by saying this but it just slipped from my mouth like wax off the wings of Icarus. Behind me, I feel a harsh slap on my back and swiftly turn around to see a pudgy kid with a huge smile on his face.

"You have to go to jail," Conner says and if he wasn't a child who stood at 4'3 I probably would've hit him.

"Yeah, I know, Conner," I glance at Ellie who is biting back a laugh and gives an obnoxious little wave as Conner drags me by the hand towards the jail. He waddles along, clinging to two of my fingers, his hands are greasy and slippery, whatever reason, I'm not sure I want to know.

He takes me to a rope circle laid out on the ground, there's already a handful of people on my team in it. Conner drops me off there, sticking his tongue out before scurrying away as fast as he could (Which wasn't very fast). There's one blue team guard, I recognized him from Jesse's cabin.

I'm far too bitter for someone playing a harmless camp game, I hold a grudge easier than I hold someone's hand. "Why are you here?" A boy from Miles cabin asks.

"Because I got tagged, Emmet," I say, agitated. "Why are you here? Because you can't outrun an eight-year-old?"

His smile drops "Yeah," He looks down at his shoes, kicking some dirt.

"How are we supposed to get out and win this?" Another boy asks.

"Jesus," I mutter "How old are you?"

"Fifteen."

"Fifteen and you've never played Capture the Flag?"

He nods his head "I mostly play COD and Fortnite."

"Oh my god," I run my hands down my face, fighting the urge to gag "Someone from our team who isn't tagged has to tag us, they can only tag one person at a time and we get a free walk back to our side if we're tagged, to win the game you need to capture the other teams flag- you know what, I feel like this is pretty self-explanatory."

"So who's going to tag us?"

"Probably no one because a kid with Fortnite skills isn't really worth saving" I answer and he falls quiet. Harsh? yes. Necessary? No, but I was annoyed.

"Hey, Crawford," A voice says, she's standing a few yards back with one of her friends giggling.

"Oh, hey," The guy guarding us, coughs, deepening his voice "What's up."

"I can't believe you're actually playing this game," The girl sniggers.

"Nah, I'm just waiting for Lucas," He lies.

"Find him later, come hang out," She smiles at him.

Crawford looks from us to her, and with little to no hesitation, he goes with the girls. Once I see their figures retreat beyond the trees, I look around to see if there are any more people on the blue team around before stepping out of the rope circle.

"I thought you said we had to get tagged by someone else before we could leave," The boy says, looking around nervously as if he was buying pot in an alley.

"Are you a narc?" I ask.

"No?"

"Then we're good to go," I say, ushering my team out of the circle. The sun has just begun to set, casting an orange hue over everything and making it look like it had been touched by Midas. While the rest of my team runs back to our side where they are safe from being tagged, I have something else on my mind, Ellie Williams.

I began to retrace my steps back to where Ellie waited with the flag and where I'm sure a bunch of overeager kids were patrolling to protect the priceless flag from the claws of the evil red team. Ellie was never into these games until I was, the second I had the urge to win something, she was compelled to beat me.

Someone hadn't been looking where they were sprinting when they crashed into me at full speed, they would've knocked me down if they weren't the same height as an Oompa Loompa. She let out an 'Oof' while she fell to the ground "Chloe?"

"Hi," She looks up at me, and quickly the posse rolls around. All of the girls in my cabin, even Tamar and Morgan were actively participating.

Leslie ran up to me and hugged me around my legs "Hi, girls," I said with furrowed eyebrows. The past two weeks I had struggled to even get them to collectively go to breakfast without putting up a fight because they didn't want to. "How's the game going?"

"We know where the flag is!" Valentina peeps up, she has mud smeared under her eyes like war paint.

"Yeah, but Ellie's there and I'm scared of her," Leah mentions.

"Well, we're all together now so we can strategize," A smile cracks onto my face.

"We should put a scorpion in her hair," Kim has a wild grin on her tanned face, her honey-blonde hair is tangled into a rat nest, with a couple of leaves in there.

"No, good idea though, we'll save that one for later," I point at Kim "I was thinking that I could distract Ellie while half of you keep the other guards away and the other half grabs the flag and makes a break for it."

Kim nods enthusiastically, Tamar doesn't seem thrilled by the idea but she doesn't object to it so I take her silence as a win. This is the exact moment I put on my invisible captain hat, giving each of my girls a specific role with the promise I would sneak them candy on Saturday if they pulled this off.

With each passing minute, the sky got darker and darker, I wanted to finish this game until Joel and Tommy made the counsellors walk around with headlamps on to keep an eye on everyone. "Hi, El."

"What do you want?" She's been standing in the same spot for a little over an hour, her vexation was shining through in her tone.

"To be done with this game," I say, prepping myself for the little heist "This is really dragging on and- I saw Crawford run off with some girls from your cabin."

"Who the hell is Crawford?" She furrows her eyebrows.

"One of Jesse's boys, I know it's an unfortunate name."

"Who did he leave with?"

"Uh," I rack my brain for their names "Cindy and the rude one."

She nods, immediately knowing who I was talking about from my vague description "So, when are you gonna run past me and steal the flag?"

"What?" I acted like her question was incredulous "Why would you think that's what I'm trying to do?" I'm so bad at acting, I'm behaving like one of those wasted middle-aged men who get pulled over on the freeway and pretend that they're stone-cold sober by making a bunch of hand gestures while they talk.

"You're awful at acting," She says, crossing her arms, I watch the veins tense in her forearm below her tattoo sleeve.

"Fuck," I muttered "Fine, I give up," I plop myself on the ground, my spine against the trunk of a tree, I look up at Ellie "Okay, I'm officially over these games."

She raises an eyebrow and I can tell that she doesn't believe me. "First of all, you're sitting in mud. Second of all, eleven years of bloodshed and you're giving up out of nowhere?"

"It's not out of nowhere, I'm just getting older," I say the second half a little quieter "I'm in college I need to stop acting immature."

We both fall silent, she doesn't know what to say to this. Ellie usually wasn't the best at comforting me in whichever situation, I remember back when I was fourteen and a wreck because my first dog died and all she could do was give me a hug and ask if I wanted water.

"You’re not immature," Ellie says, unsure of what to do.

"Alrighty," I press my lips together in a thin line, equally diffident. "I'm just bored of this, it's gotten kind of repetitive."

"Then what do you wanna do?" She asks, in this light she's dimly illuminated by the setting sun. She looks like a sculpture carved from honey.

"Keep looking at me like that and I'll do whatever you want," I smile.

"Are you trying to flirt with me?"

"Is it working?"

"Not entirely," She says, behind her, there's a snap and just before she turns around I call her attention back to me. I saw Valentina, Chloe, and Olive emerging from behind trees, just seconds away from victory.

"Okay," I chuckle "Help me up?"

Ellie regards me for a second before taking my hand stretched wide. The second her hand clasps in mine I pull her down with all of my might and believe me when I say this is no easy feat, Ellie was sturdy. Luckily I caught her off guard and managed to pin her beneath me, I straddle over her torso, gesturing for the girls to run.

"Go!" I whisper-shout so others on the blue team can't hear me. Ellie grabs me by the waist and uses momentum to flip me over, now I'm the one with my back in the mud and she sits overtop of me.

She had been so close that our lips brushed, and I had felt my heart stop, I almost didn't want to move just to see what would happen next but in utter panic, I reached next to me, a handful of mud and smeared it down Ellie's face. "You're so gross," She squeezes her eyes shut, leans back and begins to scoop mud off her face, I use this as my opportunity to wriggle out from beneath her.

It takes me a minute to get off my knees and onto my feet, by this point, almost the entirety of my legs are covered in mud, leaves, sticks, and probably bugs. I try to take off but my sneakers betray me and I fall face-first into the mud.

Of course, Ellie sees this and she's laughing so hard she needs to support herself, one forearm against a tree while her other is clutching her stomach. I scoop up more mud, almost squirming in distaste from the sensation of it caked beneath my nails but I still throw it at Ellie with perfect accuracy.

She tenses up when I do this. Once again I struggle to my feet but this time I am victorious, I stay frozen in place for a moment to be sure I won't face plant again. When I'm sure that I won't fall, I bend down to throw another mud pie at Ellie for good measure than I'm off to see if my girls completed the mission.

When I finally got back to my side I saw my team already celebrating "Woohoo!" I yell and the crowd immediately falls quiet, regarding my current state. I probably look like a creature who's just crawled out of a stagnant swamp.

"Why does she look like that?" Ashlynn whispers to Bowie who doesn't respond and from his red eyes alone, I know the reason why.

"C'mon girls," I smile "Bring it in!" I open my arms for my cabin to come in for a hug but they just back away from me with wrinkled noses.

Tommy looks at me "Why are you dirty?" I knew he was getting sassy when he propped his hands on his hips "What happened in the ten-minute gap since I last saw you that has made you so filthy?" It wasn't malice in his voice but genuine curiosity, Tommy was a fun-loving guy for the most part.

I shrugged "I wouldn't know, mate, you tell me." His eyebrows furrowed as his confusion delved even deeper. He looked into my soul from across the clearing. Eventually, Ellie makes her way to join me, she's a little better off than I am though she's still grimy.

"Oh, great, you too," Tommy says, gesturing to his niece.

Joel lets out a deep sigh "You two better shower before dinner."

I let the hot water run over my body, dripping down and consuming me whole. Ellie and I are the only ones in the showers, we're separated by nothing more than a divider though the steam is so heavy I wouldn't have been able to see her regardless.

Since we were sent to grab a change of clothes and clean off Ellie had been almost silent, she wasn't even teasing me back or making a punchline when I had thrown out an obvious setup.

After thoroughly washing the grime off of my body I turned the shower off, walking over the laminated bench where Ellie and I had out put our clothing only to find them missing. For a minute I thought I was crazy and had misplaced them but after awkwardly pattering around the shower house, I realised they were gone.

"Hey, Ellie," I say on the other side of her shower stall "Someone stole our clothes."

"You're hilarious," She deadpanned, not an ounce of amusement in her tone.

"Yeah, I know but I'm not joking."

I hear the water turn off in her stall, she pokes her head out and looks at the bench "Where did you put them?"

"I didn't put them anywhere," I say, in an attempt to sound convincing. "Someone took our shit," All that was left behind we're Ellie's Converse, knocked onto the ground and my carabiner with keys, a flashlight, and my shark keychain.

"Fuck," Ellie mutters and looks around for a moment before her eyes land on me and she quickly averts her gaze, "Can you turn around?"

"It's nothing I haven't seen before."

"I hate you."

"I hate you too." I tell her though I do turn around "What's the plan here?"

"I'm looking."

"I already did, dumbass."

"Thoroughly." She adds.

I stare at empty shower stalls and white tile walls while Ellie checks every single spot that I already have. I can hear only her and the plop of dribbles of water splattering against the cold ground. The steam is still heavy and easy on my sharp lungs.

"I can't find them," Ellie says at last. "But I did find some clothes that look like they could've belonged to Adam Sandler.”

"Yeah, no shit," I turn around and see her standing there completely nude, she moves quickly out of my eye line and into a stall "You've changed in front of me a million times, what's different now?" I say, nonchalantly, walking past her.

"Maybe I don't want you to see me buck naked."

"I think I just heard something," I stop in my tracks.

"not really the time-

"Why do you always think I'm fucking with you?" I ask, furrowed eyebrows.

"Because-

"Shh," I hush her trying to listen for the sound. I walked toward the entrance of the shower house there was a large wall in front of the door so no one could open the door to peek in, they had to go around the wall and properly enter, the same way most locker rooms were set up. I'm about ten yards away from the entrance when I see a figure poke their head out, just a quarter of its face, I can see their amber eye. They spot me in almost a split second and jet out in a blur, I hear the door open and crashing shut, their feet scrambling away. Just like that, I felt my blood run cold.

"Fuck!" I yell, scuttling back towards the stalls "Ellie, there's fucking someone in here!" My heart is beating faster than I think it ever has before and I almost feel sick with the thought that someone was in here the entire time Ellie and I had been vulnerable and unaware.

"What?" She steps out of the stall and looks around before she sees me. I'm on the floor, my knees to my chest and eyes wide. "You saw someone?"

"Yes!" I say throwing a hand out to gesture to the divider "They were hiding behind there and fucking watching us!"

"Shit," She says, walking towards the wall and looking behind it, she freezes too. Ellie turns towards me and the doubt on her face is gone "We need to find some clothes and get out of here."

"What?" I say "Did you see something?"

Ellie begins to open every single locker, tossing articles of clothing that people left behind on the ground. She wasn't exaggerating earlier when she said she found clothes that could've belonged to Adam Sandler. No wonder they were left behind.

"What was it?" I press again.

"Just some mud tracks, they were probably ours," She dismisses. "Now get dressed."

This doesn't ease me in the slightest, I'm so on edge that I haven't made a joke about Ellie and I casually being naked in front of each other. How ridiculous the pair of us looked didn't aid me in calming down; Ellie was wearing a black T-shirt about three sizes too large that read 'Ask me about my IBS' with a caricature of a man-eating cheese beneath it, this was paired with blue basketball shorts that had two white stripes running down the side. "How's your IBS?" I tease.

"It's a constant battle." At least she had her shoes, I had to wear flip-flops that hardly fit, so small I almost thought they belonged to a Barbie. While Ellie was moderately comfortable, I was not, I had to wear skinny jeans that were crudely cut into Bermuda shorts, matched with none other than an American flag tank top, how patriotic.

"I'm almost thinking it would be better to go out in nothing," I say, looking at myself in the mirror. I glance over at Ellie, I know she's trying to play it off but I can tell she's shaken. "You look so stupid."

"Damn," She says "I was just trying to show my support for those with IBS," Ellie jokes, trying to ease the tension.

The both of us are procrastinating on leaving the perceived safety of the shower house. I feel dread emanating from the woods, we will no longer be surrounded by four walls and engulfed by bright light. As we walk towards the entrance I reach for Ellie's hand, intertwining our fingers. "So we're going straight to the mess hall?"

"Yup," She says, giving my hand a little squeeze, it's her way of saying 'I got you'. I wonder if she can sense the panic pulsing through me or distress pumping in my veins. At the door I saw the tracks Ellie was staring at, they hadn't been ours. We walked in with muddy sneakers, these were barefoot prints, and whoever they belonged to had walked in many circles. I'm sick to my stomach once again, fighting the natural urge to vomit until I cry and my parents come to comfort me.

I click my flashlight on, but nothing lays ahead but forest and a beaten path. We stepped out into the darkness, it wasn't a far walk to the mess hall where everyone was gathered but that didn't stop my heart from racing like a rabbit moments away from getting snagged by a terrifying beast.

My heartbeat slowed the further we walked, so far we hadn't been kidnapped by a pervert. I take a deep breath, trying to push overtly dark thoughts to the back of my mind, next to me Ellie is calm as a marble statue bathed beneath moonlight.

Each breeze makes me shudder despite the humid weather. Suddenly, regarding my current situation, the summer camp doesn't feel like home anymore. It feels like those abandoned houses up the road that my parents had carefully trained me to stay away from. The rustle of leaves is reminiscent of the laugh that belonged to creepy men who used to watch children at the park who didn't belong to them.

I'm no longer met with the fresh scent of pine but something ancient, something rotted like it's been sitting in the back of the fridge for a decade. It reeks of shit to the point where I'm gagging on nothing like little hands of wind pushing on the back of my throat.

My hand grows sweaty clasped to Ellie's though she shows no indication of being bothered by this. I hear a rustle somewhere around, whether it's in the trees or the bushes I'm unsure, instinctivly, I freeze. I look around, the gleam from my flashlight gliding across the flora, searching for something that likely isn't there.

"It's okay," Ellie says, her voice tender as a lullaby "We're fine," She pulls gently on my hand to keep us going but I'm stuck in place. My flashlight is frozen on the body of a rabbit, Its white fur soaked through with red. I break my hand free from Ellie's grip and clasp it over my dry lips to choke down a cry. The entire skin of the rabbit's torso had been torn off on one side from the spine to the stomach, you could see its brown organs, the still beating heart, and everything that made it function was pooling out of it. If it hadn't been for its little head, beady eyes full of fear and perked-up ears, I wouldn't have known it was a rabbit at all. Whatever mauled it did a messy job that it hadn't quite finished like a dull axe to the back of the head.

Behind the trees, I hear slurping, something wet and hungry. It wretches on what I assume to either be its newest feast or its saliva. It devours every last breath it has, the breathing is shallow and gruff like it's eating so fast it's choking on its meal, though it takes the time to slurp and swallow the remnants of whatever it's chowing down on. I see a pair of golden eyes glint behind a shrub in the cast of my light.

I reach for Ellie's hand again and run like I've never run before. She quickly takes the lead, so fast that she's nearly dragging me along. We don't speak but we understand each other clearly, we need to move.

Trailing us, I hear heavy steps beating against the dirt pathway. I don't even need to look back to know that it's following u, its heavy, wet breathing is clue enough. I'm starting to feel a burning in my lungs, saliva builds in my mouth and I spit it down onto the pathway, heaving with every quick-paced step.

One of my too-tight pink flip-flops catches a rock stuck in the path and sends me tumbling to the ground. For just a moment I see a pitch-black figure wearing tattered clothing with amber eyes that glow light street lamps gaining on us; I could've sworn it had human hands and feet but I wasn't in my right mind, it's still enough to send adrenaline coursing through my veins. Without even stopping, Ellie pulls me back up and I kick off my other sandal, running barefoot on the trail.

My feet hammer against the dirt, rocks, and pebbles. I can feel the souls of my feet getting sliced and torn though I don't slow down, the sight of the mess hall in the distance makes me run even faster.

"Hey!" Ellie yells, trying to capture the attention of someone in the mess hall. Her grip on my hand doesn't loosen, in fact, it gets tighter as she pulls me along. I don't know if whatever was chasing us is still there but I'm too mortified to check.

I wave with my hand clutching my carabiner but it does nothing to garner any kind of attention within the mess hall. Our feet moving faster than we could form thoughts we ran towards the entrance.

Ellie pulls the door wide open and pushes me in before slamming the door shut behind us. The very second my heaving body hits the floor, everyone's attention falls on us.

"Woah," Miles regards us with confusion before it morphs into a smile on his face "Did you guys just have sex?" He takes a bite of his sandwich, he looks like he got into Ashlynn's stash.

"Why do you look like Adam Sandler and Hilary Duff?" Dina furrowed her eyebrows next to Jesse, he looked like he was trying to work together some type of conclusion for why we were breathing so deeply and why my feet were bleeding.

I look at Ellie and she meets my gaze, she no longer looks calm. There's a sense of dread written clearly across her features, that thing didn't seem animal, it didn't seem human either and I wasn't sure which was worse, the echo or the answer.

A/N: Not much to say today but thanks for reading! Love you all.

TAGLIST: @wherearthepilots-blog @diddiqueen my tags are being so weird I’m so sorry if you weren’t tagged

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mc-tummy-blur · 11 months

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Wait wait wait Nimona was trying to build a connection with Gloreth after being rejected by animals and Gloreth was accepting of her despite being a shape-shifter but Nimona was seen as a monster by the village which then made Gloreth switch her opinions because her parents and the village told her that Nimona was a monster and tried to kill her then 1000 years later Ballister ended up building a connection with Ambrosius a descendant of Golreth and after being rejected by the knights throughout his whole life basically since training started young Ambrosius was accepting of him despite being a commoner but then he was seen as a murderer by the town which had made Ambrosius changed his opinion on him because of what he had seen and what the knights/Director were telling him but unlike Gloreth who while was reluctant at first to treat Nimona as a monster but then gave into hating her and wanting her to die like the people around her did Ambrosius had been reluctant throughout the whole ordeal but in the end stayed committed to Ballister because he loved him despite what everyone else was saying about him and its like the movie was already drawing parallels to how Ballister and Nimona were the same and viewed as outcasts/monsters/murderers but there's notable parallels to Gloreth and Ambrosius in how they were people close to Nimona and Ballister and it came to a point where they had to go against them but the key difference in what happened was the side they chose and the aftermath when they were being forced to chose a side and it really showcases how their generations were different thus their mindsets were different in handling the situation and its just exactly like in real life when it comes to queer people like people especially children can be conditioned to hate queer people with enough fear mongering/hate speech and that's exactly what happened with Gloreth in how she ended up treating Nimona and it was going to happen with Ambrosius but a saving grace was that he was much older so it was harder to change his opinions on Ballister that and he is in a different time period than Gloreth showing how things had drastically changed and advanced in many areas and i feel that the whole point with the parallel between Gloreth and Ambrosius is that times have changed and how even though our past generations have treated queer people like they are monsters and that we should hate them when in reality its not too late for our generation to treat them like equals and that we should love them like holy shit this movie is so insanely and unapologetically queer in so many ways that I did not imagine was humanly possible

#nimona #nimona movie #nimona spoilers #netflix #ballister boldheart #ballister blackheart #ambrosius goldenloin #gloreth #nd stevenson #lgbtq #do you see what im seeing here i suddnely just realized this and its so insane to me like theres so much detail/meaning in this movie #like theres layers to this movie i have no idea if the graphic novel showcased this but still #this movie may be a corner stone in queer rep in animated movies #theres also something to be said about how Ambrosius broke the cycle of hatred/bigot ideas in his family bloodline #mctalks

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doodle-pops · 20 days

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House of Feanor | Returning Home After War/Travelling

Request: hi mina i'm so happy you're back! i would love a group headcanon with the house of feanor when they return to their love after being apart for a long time, fighting away from home. angst and fluff are so welcome!! thank youuu :) - Anon

A/N: You asked for both fluff and angst anon, so I gave both :) Maglor’s part was the only one that differed from everyone else’s. Other than that, enjoy!

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Feanor

Feanor’s return after his long yearly trip to Aulë forges would be facilitated by the overwhelming relief and joy of you throwing your arms around him for a tight hug. The rush to the door after the servants announced his return would lead to your feet rapidly pattering across the floorboards and launching yourself into his arms.

“I’ve missed you so much, my love,” you would whisper, tears of happiness glistening in your eyes. “Every day felt like an eternity without you.”

The sensation of his arms tightening around your waist as he draws you for a bone-crushing embrace, lifting you off the ground and burying his face in the crook of your neck to deeply inhale your scent would take him back to comfort and home.

“There’s not a day gone by where I didn’t miss your scent and presence,” he murmured into your skin. “I felt so though I would have gone insane without you.”

“Well now that you’ve returned, promise me that you would never leave for such a long period.”

“I promise, but why don’t we retreat indoors. I wish to spend every second granted within your presence from this day forth, melda.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Maedhros

You’re impatient, nervous and fearful of his return. What if he came back in shambles, broken, unrecognisable, or worse, dead? He couldn’t do such a horrid thing to you; not when he swore to be at your side forever. All the promises to protect, love and cherish each would have gone out the window—

“My Lady/Lord Y/N, Lord Maedhros has returned.” The servants were barely able to get all their words out before he flew out of your chair and down the staircases to be greeted by the sight of him dismounting his trusty steed. You didn’t grant him a chance to acknowledge your figure with a smile before barrelling into his body.

The coldness and sturdiness of his armour embraced you first before you felt his entire body wrapping around your frame. You didn’t know who was shedding tears from all the sniffling and sobbing, but you were glad to have him home after months of being away.

“Don’t ever leave me again! I don’t care about the wars you have to fight—let’s go somewhere far away from here and spend eternity,” you wept into his chest plate.

In return, Maedhros tenderly smiled into your hair. “Whatever you desire, my love. So long as I can be with you forever.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Maglor

You would be sitting by the window, listening for the familiar sound of the return of Elrond’s footsteps, when you heard the sound of multiple approaching. This time, among Elrond’s, there was a dragging sound against the earth along with weary muttering. Pulling the curtain to catch a proper view of the guest Elrond brought, your eyes captured the unmistakable sight of a familiar mop of inky hair.

Contemplating whether to jump out the window, you rushed out of the house and greeted Elrond, stopping them in their path to stare at the stranger. The eye contact that brought realisation, joy, uncertainty and timidness was a moment you’d never wish to forget.

“Welcome home, my sweet minstrel,” you whispered, your heart swelling with joy at his return with tears in your eyes as he rushed to his other side to hold him up and assist Elrond with guiding him into the house. “I’ve missed you more than any song.”

He would resist the urge to react to your warm welcome, yet the feeling of being loved and appreciated after all those years of being missing, invoked the tears to cascade. His sobs would confiscate his apologetic mumblings of missing and leaving you; regretting the moment he disappeared.

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Celegorm

You would be waiting by the hearth, as you had been doing for the past few weeks, awaiting his return from his year-long hunt with Oromë and his trusty companion, Huan. Picking at your nails and neatening them since there wasn’t anything else in the house to tidy, you slumped into the blankets and found yourself drifting off to wonderland with the sound of rain in the background.

Having fallen asleep for some time, the aroma of fresh herbs and meat waffled through your nose and aroused you out of your slumber. There, squatting by the hearth and turning the pot of stew was your beloved. His hair slick back into an intricate braid and a few beads at the ends and dressed in a clean suit of clothes. The earthy scent radiating off him mixed with the herbs left you yearning to bury your nose in him, and deeply inhale.

“I see you have finally awoken, sleepy beauty,” he grinned while turning his head to meet your affectionate ones. “I took the liberty of making you one of your favourites to celebrate my return. Would you like a bowl?”

Shaking your head, you instead, opened your blankets to invite him into your personal space, which he did not hesitate to accept. With a quick drop of the spoon, he walked over and found himself curled up at your side, enjoying the touch and warmth he missed during his hunt. “I think I’ll have to start shortening my hunts from now on. I miss your warmth far too much.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Caranthir

You would be waiting for Caranthir’s return, impatiently, after he departed with his brothers to raid Doriath for what was rightful their family’s own. Day and night you sat before the window facing the entrance of the castle, asking the guards for any news of the situation. No response would be given to ease your worry, causing you to continue your day and night watch from the window.

Though it wouldn’t be until one night when you fell asleep in your chair you saw him return. He came riding in his full armour and flanked by his first officers holding torches as they entered the castle grounds. Everyone cheered their return and praised their efforts on their quest, yet you found yourself unable to move from your seat out of the fear of the bloodshed they committed. You saw the blood covering his armour while he moved through the crowd to ascend and greet you.

“I have returned home, arimelda,” he greeted with sorrow on his face and stood a foot away from you.

Finding the strength to rise out your chair, you approached him with cautious yet with the underlying emotion of joy. “Moryo, is that you? Have you truly returned to me? I have missed you!”

However, the moment you stepped forward to embrace him, you awoke to the gentle nudging of Moryo hovering over you. The sight of him cladded in clean robes and a bloodstain free appearance left you appalled from the dream you had, nonetheless, you launched yourself into his arms, crying.

“You’re back! Please, please, please, please don’t ever leave me again! I thought you weren’t coming back to me! Don’t leave me again!”

Stunned at the suddenness of your gesture, he softly smiled and nuzzled your hair, whispering words of reassurance. “I promise to never leave you, my love. I’ll stay for as long as you desire.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Curufin

Curufin’s return was one of peace as he entered through the doorway during the crack of dawn. Sauntering through the quiet household, he placed down all his gadgets and trunks of gifts he returned home with for you and your little one, and marched into the kitchen, wanting to surprise you both with a treat. Quietly that morning, the atmosphere was filled with the aroma of herbs, sausages, eggs and baked goodies as he busied himself with a look of concentration.

Caught up in the rapture of making you all a hearty breakfast, he jolted with a curt yelp the moment your arms encircled his waist, and you leaned in to hug his back. “I didn’t know you were an excellent cook, Curvo? Who taught you how to make all these delicious treats?”

Snickering at your comment, he turned around in your arms and made a quick observation over your shoulder before leaning in for a savoury kiss. Your body melted the moment upon contact, as did he, from the sweetness that dripped from his gesture. It was true that absence made the heart grow fonder, and you were pleased to witness it with Curufin.

“There are many things that you still do not know about me,” he hummed as he broke the kiss to plop a piece of strawberry in your mouth. “That is why I chose to surprise you like this. Do you like it?”

“I do,” you grinned and leaned in for another kiss. “But I prefer the real meal in my arms this morning. We missed you every day; you were gone for too long.”

Frowning slightly, he pondered on the right words to reply, to satisfy your needs. Then with great thought, he responded, “Well, you will have me home for an even longer period. Father is working on other things, so he gave me time off to spend with my family. So, tell me, what would you have me do?”

“Hold me a little longer…before the little gremlin steals all your time.”

“Very well then.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Amrod

As the sun began to dip below the horizon, casting a golden glow across the rolling hills, you stood at the edge of their homestead, eyes scanning the distant path for any sign of your beloved. You had spent countless days waiting, each one blending into the next, filled with a mixture of hope and worry. But tonight, something felt different.

When a familiar silhouette appeared on the horizon, your heart leapt in your chest. It was Amrod, his red hair catching the last rays of the setting sun, making him look almost ethereal. Tears sprang to your eyes as you broke into a run, your feet carrying you as fast as they could across the fields.

“Amrod!” you called out, your voice catching in your throat as you drew closer.

Amrod turned at the sound of your voice, a weary but radiant smile spreading across his face. He opened his arms wide, and you collided with him, burying your face in his chest. The scent of him—earthy and familiar—was a balm to your frayed nerves.

“You’re home,” you whispered, your voice muffled against his tunic. “You’re really home.”

He held you tightly, his own eyes shining with unshed tears. “I promised I would return to you,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “And here I am.”

They stood there for a long time, wrapped in each other’s arms, the world around them fading away. You could feel the tension in his muscles, the weight of his experiences still clinging to him.

“Come inside,” you said finally, pulling back just enough to look up into his eyes. “You must be exhausted. Let me take care of you.”

Amrod nodded, a grateful smile on his lips. “As you wish, my love.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Amras

The first light of dawn broke over the horizon as you stood on the front steps of your cottage, your heart heavy with anticipation. Amras had been gone for what felt like an eternity, and each day without him had been a struggle. You had tried to keep herself busy, tending to their home and the land, but the ache of his absence was always there, a constant reminder of how much you missed him.

When you finally saw a lone rider approaching in the distance, you held your breath, your eyes straining to make out the familiar figure. As he drew closer, the sight of his copper hair and the way he sat in the saddle told her everything she needed to know. It was Amras, your Amras, returning at last.

“Amras!” you called out, your voice breaking with emotion as you ran towards him.

Amras dismounted swiftly, his own expression a mixture of relief and longing. He caught you in his arms, lifting you off your feet as he held you close. The feel of his strong arms around you, the warmth of his body, was like coming home after a long and arduous journey.

“I missed you so much,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “Every single day.”

He buried his face in your hair, inhaling deeply. “And I missed you,” he replied, his voice thick with emotion. “I thought of you every moment we were apart.”

You pulled back slightly, just enough to look into his eyes, hands cupping his face. “Are you alright?” you asked, her gaze searching his for any signs of injury or pain.

Amras nodded, his eyes softening as he looked at you. “I am now that I’m with you,” he said. “The journey was long and hard but knowing I had you to come back to kept me going.”

With tears streaming down your cheeks, you kissed him gently, lips brushing against his in a tender, reassuring gesture. “Come inside,” you said softly. “You need to rest, and I have so much to tell you.”

He smiled a genuine, unguarded smile that lit up his entire face. “Lead the way, my love.”

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Celebrimbor

Upon Celebrimbor’s return home after war or a long journey, you would be overcome with a whirlwind of emotions, ranging from relief and joy to a subtle undercurrent of apprehension. As you stood at the threshold of your home, waiting with bated breath for his arrival, every passing moment felt like an eternity, each heartbeat echoing the rhythm of your longing.

Finally, the sound of footsteps heralds Celebrimbor’s return, and you rush forward to greet him, your heart pounding with anticipation. When you catch sight of him, standing tall and proud, weariness etched into the lines of his face, your heart breaks and swells with love all at once.

Without a word, you would envelop him in a tight embrace, your arms wrapping around him with an almost desperate fervour. You would bury your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of him, a blend of sweat and metal and something uniquely his own, a scent that fills them with a sense of homecoming.

“I missed you,” you would whisper against his ear, your voice trembling with emotion. “I missed you so much.”

Celebrimbor would return the embrace, holding you close as if afraid to let go, his touch a comforting anchor in the storm of emotions raging within him. “And I missed you, my love,” he would murmur in response, his voice rough with exhaustion and unspoken emotion. “More than words can express.”

Masterlist

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ccarrot · 7 months

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what made you fall for chuuya?

LOADED QUESTION

let's go through this step by step

1.) his design. there's so much to talk about there!

One thing I really appreciate about harukawa's costume designs is that despite the series taking place in 2010ish, the main cast's outfits have a very old fashioned vibe. like they're from the mid-20th century. very fitting considering that the bsd world is just recovering from a World War event. So we always get a really interesting mix of different time periods when it comes to the fashion in the series.

So i like the classy, timeless aesthetic of the design as i do with most of the characters but i also appreciate how ... punk it its? Like the gloves, the belts, the tie with the buckle, the hat, the FREAKING CHOKER. let's remember that chuuya was a teenager during the 2000s and then look at the edgier elements of his fancy executive outfit

so many layers! so many accessories!!!!!! there's so much happening here but it doesn't look like too much. But the hat especially, it's a really fun call back to the namesake poet but it's such a good identifiable part, instantly makes his silhouette interesting. The big cape/coat too, and to a lesser extent the gloves and cuffed sleeves are really cool features for his silhouette. shame they got rid of the belt and hat chain for the anime. i'm also a weirdo who finds drawing the hat fun

Overall I like his color palette. i'm a bigbigbig fan of warm tones and red/orange color schemes, and chuuya's is that but darker and muted. very nice to look at. I like his hair especially, I like that its long but not really long like when harukawa draws it. I like that he has a weird haircut. I spent a lot of time staring at it to figure out the mechanics of it but settled on 'it looks nice!' I like the color harukawa uses for it the most, a really dull red, bordering on light brown. it's so nice.

2.) his personality!

He acts so cocky, and overconfident. It's fun that he's so expressive. you'd think that a person in his occupation should maintain stoicism (which he can! he's so good at deception if 15, sb and meursault have shown us anything) but i think it's so interesting that he chooses to be more emotive with his expressions.

I think it's interesting that he chooses to be honest and try to play fair against his opponents even though it would be easier to just decimate them without talking things out, (even though that has seriously put him at a disadvantage. i'm thinking about how much easier it would have been for him if he just bust down the hospital and had his squad rush the ada in cannibalism instead of giving them a chance to negotiate). it's cool how he uses earnestness to trick people into thinking they've got an upper hand over him, like in 15-stormbringer. (on that topic though it is rough that he got matched up against ranpo in cannibalism LMAO)

I like how childish and snarky he gets with Dazai. i like how he tries to put on a totally cool put together energy infront of his colleagues (and kenji who's a fan). i like how he looks so done and ever suffering when he's with mori. i like how when he tries trying to put on a neutral face hoshikawa and harukawa draw him looking a little tired and melancholy. just a little extra on the eyebags

Stormbringer chuuya's probably the most compelling to me. If there's one thing that you have to understand about chuuya's character, it's that he's at his core a deeply sad person. <-His ability is called "for the tainted sorrow" after all (delightfully edgy name too btw. it's so dramatic.)

I think a lot of misconceptions about his character come from the fact that despite seeming to be relatively straightforward outwards, he's full of contradictions. If he's happy he'll play it off as aloofness, fear he'll turn to anger, when he's really angry he'll choose not to act on it, and he'll push down his sorrow and grief and make it seem like he's fine and everything is fine. Stormbringer was like an insane crash course in compartmentalization and chuuya went from being consumed by his hopelessness to 'ah guess it doesn't matter.' like damn bro, you actually doing good or are you just saying it?

bonus but i think it's really under talked about how easily he puts on masks. especially cheerful ones because he's got that too. the parallels between him and dazai are insane...

i think about the arcade confrontation scene in the fifteen manga and the tunnel fight too much.

Anyways here's some more chuuya expressions from the mangas because he's got so many good ones and ilovehim

2.5) fun entrances and his not-quite-villainy

I know asagiri has totally abandoned the idea of the Port Mafia being actual villains, but as an antagonist, Chuuya is,,,,,,,, he qualifies because he's in the Port Mafia, i think.

Every time he shows up, he's usually only there to help the ada in a terribly roundabout way (usually on mori's orders). The only time he was genuinely a threat to our heroes was cannibalism . . but he seriously dropped the ball there lmao XD Even though he's a criminal and enjoys a good fight it's nice how killing people and overpowering his enemies isn't really his first option, even though that'd be so easy for him. this one exchange of him and mori is so funny for that reason too, chuuya is so alarmed

another thing i really really find fascinating is how during the Guild Arc, Atsushi got the idea of teaming up with the Port Mafia because he saw Chuuya and Black Lizard defending the streets of Yokohama. It's like Asagiri was literally waving to us and saying hey hey hey they aren't the bad guys and you should want them to succeed.

i hope chuuya and atsushi can meet. they're my favorites.

Overall i think despite him having a limited pagetime, I think it's all used very very effectively (except in cannibalism. but that's a different story). A lot of his actions ultimately aid the heroes more than anything, which is cool for a character who's apparently a key member of the enemy org.

anyways.

3.) his BACKSTORY. strap in.

context time!!!!! when i was first reading bsd (reading bc I started with the manga) i was still mainly hyperfixated on Evangelion and this is very very very relevant.

Neon Genesis Evangelion IF YOU DON'T KNOW (why are you following me if you didn't actually) is a psychological horror disguised as a scifi-mecha anime. It focuses a lot about grief and depression and messed up interpersonal relationships. but it's story is about child soldiers, government exploitation, war trauma, human experimentation etc and the likes. And so to put it REALLY SIMPLY, Chuuya's reminds me of Asuka and Rei and that's one reason why i really hooked onto him. I've joked that he could be a strayed Eva pilot but i am being genuine.

So now that THAT's out of the way. Fifteen & Stormbringer are a very very well crafted side story/prequels that gives a lot of insight to the BSD universe and really narrows in on some of the horror of this world. And I think Asagiri did a very good job with integrating this overarching lore with Chuuya's story arc, and also pacing out these releases. So.. lemme give you a play by play on how I got through this

Chuuya I think was set up from the very start to have a lot of mystery surrounding him. When we first meet him he's a cocky little shit but you're also wondering, "He's dazai's ex-partner? what did that entail? what did they go through?" And then the Lovecraft fight happens and now you're thinking "what the FUCK is corruption and WHY the fuck is corruption?" So you're casually making your way through Bungo Stray Dogs not really seeing much of him until you realize that the light novels exist so time for Fifteen!

And honestly the twist in Fifteen really DID get me too because at that point I started reading Chuuya kinda like. kinda like Naruto, lmao. The "I am Arahabaki" moment was wonderful. But there's something actually horrifying about that scene as well, the way his entire face becomes blacked out when he confesses that he's the one they've been running around looking for for the entire book. the way he completely rejects his own humanity, the way he fights with his hands in his pockets because it puts him at a disadvantage? the way he really does think he's nothing but his powers and the singularity inside him.

^^ something that's really really interesting is that despite being so strong, chuuya sorta sabotages himself a LOT. I do think some of that is intentional but hmmm different story but the abridged version is that even though he feels like he needs to have control over himself, I think he does want others to take that control away from him. And also Chuuya's loyalty , which is his key trait, is really rooted in who takes care of him. So he lets the Sheep take advantage of him, because they took him in, and he chooses the Port Mafia bc they gave him stability and defended him. He 'forgives' Verlaine because Verlaine wanted to do what he thought was best for him. He trust's Dazai with his life because Dazai validated his humanity. ,,

okay so anyways. nothing can begin to explain the sheer brain rot i got over Storm Bringer. Genuinely the most insane thing i've ever read in my life. Especially the lab parts with N, fundamentally altered my brain chemistry. I literally cannot think about chuuya without thinking about it. It's like, psychological horror story and a buddy cop story and a tragedy and a coming of age and the most sci-fi that bsd has ever gotten and it's so much. it's so so so much. wat?

Fifteen-Stormbringer is what REALLY got me hooked on Chuuya's character. Like he was intriguing for me until this, and I'm a weirdo who doesn't always latch onto characters based on vibes alone so i needed A Reason to like him as much as i do and i found it soooooo

4. conclusion! but not really i'm GOING to keep rambling about him in other posts lmao ;D

Chuuya might be a side character but he has SUCH a presence. I have a huge soft spot for protagonist type of characters, i'm a little basic like that but most of my favorites from a lot of fandoms are usually the main characters. And Chuuya might not be the protagonist but he is definitely the hero of another story in a way...

I think i kin him a little bit. maybe a little i can't really tell. Not self aware enough for that 🤔 you tell me.

Asagiri and Harukawa really hit the jackpot with him though

#this is an appreciation post and meta analysis fusion monstrosity #anyways I love lovelovelovleoleobloelboeooeooeoe LOVE CHUUYA NAKAHARA BUNGO STRAY DOGS #ask #bsd #yeah i took this anon as an excuse to ramble about chuuya #bite me or whatever.

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unstablenoodle · 28 days

Text

Just graduated, and I’ve been dragging myself by my hair through the last 4 years. here’s advice if you’re new to college:

Basic advice:

Make friends in your lectures. You will know some of those people all four years, and some of them are better at this than you. You’re still capable, but there’s always a bigger fish and you should make that fish into a study buddy

Get a job at a food court/ campus restaurant. You get a free meal, which might be your only one for the day if you don’t have a meal plan. Work can also be a mental break from academics.

Abuse office hours. Annoy your TA. make them scared to see you. TA’s are tired grad students and you won’t have a formal relationship with them: they are students too.

Study advice:

Flash cards are for review and rote learning only. 15-30 minute power review sessions for things you already know. If you’re going over familiar shit, do it in short, repetitive bursts.

Be the bitch with annoying decorative notes. Make it a game, it’ll force you to look at the material more. I will say though, make sure you decorate with purpose.

Those friends you made in lecture? That’s where you get the big studying done. If you’re going for a higher 4 hour long study sesh, bring other people. They know things you don’t and vice versa, so you can fill in the gaps for each other. This type of studying is for unfamiliar or confusing material.

Big study sessions usually only happen a couple weeks out from exams at most. Before exams, your homework is your main means of studying.

Just go to the lecture. I don’t care if it’s at 7:30 am, go. Participation points could be the difference between a B and a C.

TI-84 graphing calculator

Pub chem

If a professor, for some ungodly reason, says you aren’t allowed to work on the homework with other people, fuck that guy.

Your $168.99 textbook is likely a free PDF online.

Date someone who fills in your gaps. I dated an engineer I met in a physics class and it worked beautifully.

Mental health (my advice on this is very specific):

Basic advice: drink water regularly, eat vegetables, exercise. You know all this.

Stay far, far away from any substance called a “study buddy” or something like that

Get a hobby. Actually. Something to do in your free time to keep you from going insane. I personally like knitting and drawing, but it can be anything. I’d say avoid something involving technology because it’s easy to fall into that for hours at a time. Do something that engages your hands and your brain. You might not be creative, but creativity is good for you. Your painting looks like shit? The benefits you have reaped from its creation are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Good job.

If you are having any kind of hallucination (visual, auditory, presence, etc.), seek professional help immediately. I have lived half my life with the feeling of eyes on me and the presence of people who aren’t actually there and never tried to fix it because I could “work around it.” Just go get help. Hallucinations can also be a symptom of neurological issues and physical illness.

OCD and disorders involving psychosis are aggravated by stress. Your classes will stress you out. Disorders like this are scary and debilitating, so you absolutely need to be in therapy, possibly on medication. They also tend to be episodic, so you may have periods of recovery where your life quality improves. Do NOT be fooled: you still need to be in therapy even if you feel good. Preventative measures are the best measures!!

Social:

Get a job. Work friends are funnier and way more entertaining than any other kind of friend

I recommend a group of 2-4 people you chill with regularly. Movie night with them once a week (barring exam weeks and extenuating circumstances)

Talk with your roommates at least occasionally. It’s no fun living with total strangers.

Do not start smoking cigarettes. A lot of people are repulsed by the smell and it clings to you.

Hygiene. Mainly you should smell good. You don’t have to go crazy with an expensive perfume/ cologne, but shower and always have a decent scent. Also try not to wear stained clothes.

Not sure how useful this is, but it’s the first thing I could think of. I’ll come back and edit if I think of more.

#studybrl #studyspo #university #college #studyinspo

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marvel-ous-m · 1 year

Text

Eddie Munson’s Guide for How to Adopt a Jock in Four Easy Steps (5/5)

Part One / Part Two / Part Three / Part Four

AO3 Link

A.N.: I’m actually kind of emotional posting this! It’s the first multi-chapter fic I’ve uploaded for ST and y’all have been so lovely this week. I hope you enjoy this 2,776 word ending (damn) to this fic that I’ve SO enjoyed writing and sharing.

I want to give a very special shoutout to my best friend @lamoabss for being my beta for this chapter and also just being an all-around wonderful person. Please give them a follow, they’re so insanely talented and we’re planning to do some collabs over the summer!

Okay, onto the last chapter!

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The first part of Step Three is easy enough- with all of Hellfire onboard, Eddie just needs to figure out the basics of Steve Harrington: likes, dislikes, allergies, school schedule, etc. All the things that high school students share with each other in the cafeteria over lunch or between class periods. So, Eddie makes like glue and sticks to Steve’s side. For the classes they share, Eddie moves to sit in the desk next to Steve- which is, sadly, pretty easy- no one is keen to sit next to the fallen king, probably out of some dumbass fear that they would catch whatever social pariah-ness that Steve had suddenly taken on. They trade notes during the classes that Steve zones out during- which, Eddie makes a mental note, are English and Math. (The other class they share together is Chemistry, and Steve can barely take his focus from whatever their science teacher is talking about to say ‘hi’ to Eddie when he comes into class five minutes late, which he does on a fairly regular basis. Eddie also files that information away for later).

By some unexplainable miracle, for the classes that Eddie doesn’t share with Steve, some member of Hellfire can fill in that space. Jeff takes Spanish 2 with Steve, Gareth has woodshop, and Grant has art and P.E.. Eddie employs them to run reconnaissance as they work together to make sure that Steve never has to sit alone in a class, and they begin to compile information through their various efforts.

Steve can draw pretty well, but he only uses pens to sketch. He loves art class and sits at the front to see the board better, so he probably needs glasses. He talked to the P.E. teacher last week and now all he does during class is sit in her office and file papers, I think she’s making him sit out for a few weeks because she thinks he has a concussion. Based on his behavior, he probably does. -Grant.

Steve hates woodshop. He sits in the back of the class and doesn’t pay attention, and if the professor catches him and makes him actually do work, he gets this look in his eye and panics a little. He does this thing with his right hand where he clenches it a couple times until he can breathe better. He won’t go near a hammer. I don’t really understand it. -Gareth.

Steve sucks at Spanish. He said something to me the other day about the letters not making sense. With the way he squints at his paper and the way he writes… I’m going out on a limb here, but he might be dyslexic? -Jeff.

Steve doesn’t pay attention in Math but he has an A, so he’s actually freakishly good with numbers. He doesn’t pay attention in English for the opposite reason, I think Jeff’s onto something. He loves Chemistry but he doesn’t have the best grade in that class. I think he pays attention because he wants to do a better job. He’s well rested on Monday and Friday morning, but Tuesday, Wednesday, and especially Thursday he looks like he’s about to fall over all day. I catch him nodding off in Math those days, and, maybe coincidentally, his shoes are really muddy on the mornings when he comes in tired. -Eddie.

With the new information, the boys get to work. Gareth makes himself Steve’s woodshop partner, doing the majority of the building and letting Steve relax for the most part, having him only do whatever wood staining that needs to be done. Grant shares some of his sketches with Steve in class to try and make him more confident about his art skills, which works surprisingly well. Grant also brings up his dyscalculia seamlessly over lunch one day and answers whatever questions Steve has. Jeff gives Steve his Spanish notes and asks to study together on Thursday nights. Steve turns him down- apparently Thursday nights he actually babysits Dustin so that Dustin’s mom, Claudia, can go to a Bingo thing with her friends, but Steve offers up Fridays after class in the library, which becomes a new tradition for them.

Eddie can’t offer much in the way of English notes (why read Shakespeare when there are hundreds of Sci-Fi and Fantasy books out in the world?) but he does make time to talk with Steve about English during lunch on Tuesdays. They go to the library instead of sitting in the cafeteria with the rest of Hellfire, and they work their way through whatever assigned reading their teacher gives them. Steve’s pretty tired, but not as tired as he is on Wednesdays or Thursdays, so it works, and they both find themselves actually understanding the subject matter for once. As for math- well, Eddie has Steve answer whatever questions he has rather than the other way around, but that seems to help Steve’s confidence about his math skills- which really are quite impressive. Eddie also finds himself as Steve’s lab partner for every Chem project. It’s a little bit chaotic- turns out that Steve understands Chemistry to a certain extent, but prefers to mess around more than actually learn something- which, yeah, dangerous, but also fun… very fun. (Eddie especially likes to play with the Bunsen burner- call him a pyromaniac- but his antics always pull a laugh from Steve, a bright sound that makes Eddie’s heart sing, so he keeps at it despite many, many reprimands from their Chem teacher).

The winter months turn to Spring, and Steve begins to bloom at the same pace as the flowers and trees around town. He contributes to conversations at lunch, plans to hang out with the guys when he has spare time, attends their band practices and cheers them on- hell, by March he even agrees to play a character in Eddie’s newest campaign. Eddie makes him a Paladin, which he claims fits Steve the best out of everything he could think of. Steve loves the character and picks up on what it’s like to actually play the game rather than strategize pretty quickly- unsurprisingly, Steve loves it.

The Hellfire boys seem to take Steve’s blooming personality in stride- Jeff goes over to Steve’s to bake chocolate chip cookies one-on-one, which they bring to the next campaign. He and Grant bond over art, swapping sketches and gifting each other art supplies. Every time Steve receives something, his eyes get this look- and every time that Eddie witnesses it, he’s reminded of why they brought Steve into their small-but-mighty crew, and is extremely grateful that Steve is acclimating so well. Steve and Gareth are fast friends, which takes all of them by surprise. Apparently, Steve gave Gareth some hairstyling tips, and that was that.

Steve’s personality isn’t the only thing that’s changing come Spring. Eddie finds himself staring at Steve’s mouth much more frequently. In fact, he can count a number of times where he could swear that Steve was doing the same to him. They laugh at each other's jokes more frequently, share stolen moments by Steve’s locker in between classes where they speak in hushed voices about whatever comes to mind. It’s… nothing that Eddie’s ever experienced before. At the same time, Eddie can’t imagine life without these moments with Steve, and while Jeff’s cautionary words are still at the forefront of his mind, he can feel himself falling harder, and it’s slowly reaching a worrisome point-of-no-return.

Time flies, and in the blink of an eye, it’s June. Steve passes all of his classes with the help of Hellfire, Eddie fails English and P.E. again (which he unfortunately expected- another year in this hell doesn’t sound all that appealing, but he figures that he can at least hang out with the guys for another year, and with Jeff in Senior English maybe he’ll actually pass). The four of them attend Steve’s graduation, where they meet some of the middle schoolers that Steve had spoken so highly about over the last few months. They all sit together and cheer as loud as they can when Steve walks across the stage and gets his diploma, even earning a few hushed whispers from surrounding parents to sit down and be quiet. Steve’s parents were nowhere to be found, but when everyone caught up with Steve after the ceremony to congratulate him, it was clear that he didn’t mind- in that moment, he had everyone that he cared about surrounding him.

Hellfire presented Steve with a club T-Shirt as a graduation gift, which he took with a wide smile on his face and that same look in his eye. Eddie took a moment to mentally pat himself on the back- Step Three: Get Steve Fully Integrated Into Hellfire, complete. (Yeah, he fell harder for Steve, but he kept that to himself and got Steve through the rest of the school year while also giving him a new group of friends- and, theoretically, Steve was none the wiser about Eddie’s feelings. All in all- not bad, Munson. Not bad.)

The kids had to leave pretty quickly after congratulating Steve- something about getting Dustin packed for summer camp and Claudia having been the one to drive all of them to graduation- but not without Dustin and his friends making Eddie promise to let them into Hellfire when September came around, while simultaneously gawking about him letting someone like Steve into the group. (Their bright personalities and excitement about Hellfire helped Eddie feel a bit more optimistic about the year ahead- who knew, maybe ‘86 would be his year).

Once the crowd dispersed, the rest of the boys of Hellfire also going their separate ways to get a start on summer plans, Eddie invited Steve over to the trailer to share a joint and spend the night. Wayne was pulling a 24 hour shift, and Eddie figured Steve needed an opportunity to let loose before starting work at the new ice cream shop, a job Steve was dreading. (Although, Eddie was secretly pretty excited about Steve’s new job, given the embarrassing uniform that Steve had described).

Steve took Eddie up on his offer, which is how they ended up splayed next to each other on Eddie’s bed, legs tangled together and giggling through the soft haze that came with working through some of Eddie’s stash. One thing led to another, and, at Steve’s quiet, embarrassed request, they tried out ‘shotgunning’, which turned into a very heated makeout session.

The development was entirely unexpected, but, as was later revealed during a conversation at sunrise, mutually very welcomed. So maybe Step Three wasn’t entirely completed in accordance with Jeff’s warning, but whatever. This was good- actually, scratch that, this was perfect. Best-of-all-possible-scenarios, win-win situation. They started dating- keeping it secret, only sharing it with the other members of Hellfire, and then only because Jeff clocked it within three minutes of one of their summer D&D sessions starting. They were all very supportive (save for a warning glare from Jeff that Eddie was on the receiving end of), and for about a month, Steve was the happiest that Eddie had ever seen. And yeah, Eddie was the happiest he’d been in a long time, too. Sue him, Steve was a great boyfriend- and was fucking perfect in the bedroom. (12/10 stars, give the man an award, kinda perfect. And that sailor suit? Goddamn…) Eddie didn’t know how he got so lucky, but he was going to do everything in his power to keep this gift from the universe in prime condition.

June turned to July, and Eddie’s understanding of the world as he knew it completely changed come Independence Day. Eddie was woken up by a phone call in the middle of the night from Steve, who, sounding beyond exhausted, asked for a ride home for him and his coworker Robin. Eddie arrived at the scene and was shocked by the sheer magnitude of what he had unknowingly stumbled upon. There were at least five times as many emergency response vehicles than Hawkins had, the newly-constructed mall was actively burning to the ground, there was a huge crowd outside a long yellow barrier of police tape, and a few faces Eddie recognized beyond the police tape: specifically Steve’s middle schoolers, Nancy Wheeler, Jonathan Byers, and-

There was Steve, holding a blanket around his shoulders, sitting in the back of an ambulance next to his coworker Robin, who Eddie knew from theater, band, and the handful of times he came in to visit Steve at work. Eddie ducked under the police tape without much fanfare and made his way over to the ambulance, pulling Steve into a hug the second he was within arms length.

They left pretty soon after that, Steve quietly explaining that he had told Robin about their relationship after vomiting their brains out in the movie theater bathroom. Which- Eddie wasn’t really sure how to unpack all of that, but that wasn’t exactly important at the moment. He drove Steve and Robin to Steve’s house, and, at their request, Eddie laid in Steve’s parent’s California King bed with the two of them. After a few hours of all of them trying to sleep but coming up unsuccessful, Steve finally started speaking. Once he started, he couldn’t stop, and an explanation of the hidden dark side of Hawkins came spewing out.

It was dawn by the time Steve finished recounting everything, and Eddie believed him without question. He trusts Steve intrinsically, he knows Steve would never lie about something like this- something so life-altering and burdensome. Besides, Steve’s story matched events that Eddie could place: Will going ‘missing’, followed by Barbara Holland, then Will magically re-appearing around the same time that Steve had his falling out with Hagan and came back to school with a beat-up face from Jonathan Byers. Steve walking the tracks with Dustin as he’d explained all those months ago in November took on a new meaning- they were searching for a monster from an alternate dimension that Dustin had accidentally let loose. The clenching motion Steve made and his aversion to woodshop suddenly made sense, too. In the middle of recounting the events of early November 1984, Steve left his parents room and returned with a wooden bat filled with nails that fit perfectly in Steve’s hand- he explained with an embarrassed flush on his cheeks that it kept him grounded, that he couldn’t sleep without it- that sometimes, when he was anxious, he felt himself reaching for the thing- but if he was relaxed, the idea of holding something even vaguely similar made him sick to his stomach.

Steve then moved on to describe the sleepless nights, how he made himself patrol Hawkins from sundown to sunup on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights, often trudging through the forest with his bat, ready to kill the next ‘big bad’ that came from the dimension existing under their feet.

Robin contributed what she could when Steve reached the events at Starcourt. After hours of talking in hushed whispers under the covers of Mr. and Mrs. Harrington’s bed, the three of them passed out, too exhausted to keep their eyes open.

The next few weeks were hard, but the three of them got through the nightmares together. Before Eddie knew it, the school year was starting, Robin and Steve were inseparable, working together at Family Video (because the two could barely spend a minute apart), and July 4th, 1985 felt like a distant thing.

As the months passed, Eddie and Steve’s relationship only became stronger, and in March of 1986, when Eddie watches Chrissy Cunningham be killed by seemingly supernatural forces, he knows who to call.

With a proactive start on things, they kill Vecna on the first try. No one dies- really, the worst that happens is a couple of scratches here and there. They live.

They love.

One day far in the future, as Eddie watches his husband play with their daughter, he thinks back to that November day in 1984, and sends a quiet thank you to his younger self. That Eddie in the library may have had no idea the long-lasting effects that his plan would’ve had on his life, but Eddie couldn’t be more thankful. Steve was nothing like the ‘lost sheep’ Eddie had initially assessed him to be- he had grown so much, found himself, accepted himself. He was Steve. Eddie’s Steve. He was his own, beautiful, intelligent, kind, sometimes-awkward (yet adorably so), person.

Secret, Unplanned Step Four: Make Steve Harrington Fall in Love with Me (While I Fall Irresistibly in Love With Him), complete.

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Tag List: @ellietheasexylibrarian @cuips-not-cute @melodymeddler @i-have-three-feelings @sc00ps-ahoy @singmeyoursimpsong @patchworkgargoyle @spectrum-spectre @devondespresso @thesuninyaface @obsessivlyme @angeldreamsoffanfic @carlyv @nburkhardt @inspirationorinsanity @rebelspykatie @my2amgaythoughts @lavenderagenda @just-a-tiny-void @mamafaithful @breadboi66 @beholdingloser @randomfandomcontent @oftirnanog @yellowdevilkitten @steves-strapcollection @keep-er-steddie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @bisexualdisastersworld @jinxjinn @copingmechanizm @blackpanzy @failedstarsandgoldenclouds @evix-syne666 @crisisinverted17 @satan-is-obsessed @shrimply-a-menace @anaibis @trashcanniballecter @thoughtfulbreadpolice @awholedamnmesstbh @chaoticvictorianspirit @jcmadgirl @satan-is-obsessed @tommyvelvet @sleepdeprivedflower @fruitmix @carvingsnowdogs @annabanannabeth @rhyswritesreadsandcries @a-little-unsteddie @goodolefashionedloverboi @escapingthereality @aellafreya @lololol-1234

#stranger things #stranger things fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #my writing #1984 steddie meeting au my beloved #steddie fic #pre s4 #pre s4 meeting #s2 rewrite #steve harrington needs a hug #hurt/comfort

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floatingcatacombs · 6 months

Text

Go Nagai was insane for this one

12 Days of Aniblogging 2023, Day 8

I like to always have manga of dubious quality on tap for when I’m having trouble sleeping. Ideally, reading a few chapters will distract me, but I won’t want to stay up late shotgunning volumes. Devilman Lady was the ideal manga for this, and this is maybe the last time anyone will ever describe Devilman Lady as "ideal".

An extremely brief introduction is in order. If Osamu Tezuka is the godfather of manga, then Go Nagai is manga’s weird horny uncle. He’s arguably just as influential, the two of them just moved in different circles, each reifying entire genres. Nagai is more or less responsible for magical girls, super robot, and ecchi, and also spent a lot of time in the sphere of supernatural and post-apocalyptic manga. These are fundamentally genres of extremity and ridiculousness, and Nagai dials every one of his works up to 11 by the end, one way or another. Devilman is probably his most famous work over here, and it’s a stone-cold classic for a reason. Nagai has kept revisiting it over the years, with side stories, alternate universes, manga cameos, and even entirely new series that function as stealth sequels such as Violence Jack. But his most notable attempt is Devilman Lady, which is far more than a simple gender-swap of the original.

Devilman Lady is about swimming deep in filth. It’s easily the most disgust-provoking manga I’ve read, with pretty much every content warning under the sun applicable. This is a truly rotten and conspiratorial world that Nagai is depicting. Societal decay manifests in countless forms, including rape, child abuse, homophobia, militarism, and hatred towards immigrants. Anything that could be potentially understood as fanservice is placed right next to or directly within the atrocities at hand, and it's genuinely unclear how much Nagai intended that as commentary. His intentions throughout this whole manga are a bit of an enigma, but what's clear that he is firing on all cylinders.

This is an extremely zeitgeisty 90’s work, with intelligent design debates, the mapping of the human genome, new age paranoia, religious zealotry, and anxiety over pollution all playing out on the pages. Where it breaks from many of its contemporaries is a decisive rejection of the end of history. This is the kind of thing you write when you’re still reeling from the subway sarin gas attacks and your country's role in the Gulf War and subsequent militarization. It’s the perfect manga for capturing a time period when ten to twenty percent of Japan’s population were estimated to have belonged to a new religious movement.

The punchline to all of this is that he doesn’t know how to draw women.

By the back half of Devilman Lady, Nagai’s depictions of hellscapes and grotesque monsters reach near-Berserk levels of detail and technical competency. And yet his female protagonists are still drawn in a drastically simpler 70's style, only now with giant spheres grafted to their chests. Either humans and the infernal are two completely different skillsets, or this was a deliberate artistic decision, and both are difficult to swallow. Either way, we just have to accept the juxtapositions.

one of my favorite pages to show people devoid of context

The finale is just nuts. Go Nagai makes textual the homoeroticism and gender deviance of the original Devilman manga, as the world burns in both nuclear warfare and demonic hellfire. The story starts accelerating at an unfathomable pace, the most inscrutable double mobius reacharound yaoiyuri occurs, and the universe resets once or twice. It makes the endings of Jojo Part 6 and 7 look tame by comparison. There is no way to parse this like a normal manga with a plot and narrative. It is raw id.

This has been a year where I’ve tried to deliberately broaden my comfort zone by engaging with more potentially upsetting works if I think they'll have something interesting to say. This was like jumping into the deep end. Devilman Lady may very well be Go Nagai’s magnum opus. It’s not nearly as tight as the original manga, but it’s a glorious mess, just as radical to its own time as Devilman must have been in the 70s. It made for spectacular insomnia reading. And there’s no way in hell I can ever recommend it.

At age 19, Nagai went through a bout of diarrhea so bad that he convinced himself it was colon cancer, and that he was at death's door. He vowed to leave something behind for the world to remember him by, and began laboring away on manga. And for the last 60 years of his career, he’s written and drawn with the fervor of a man who’s about to shit himself to death. Maybe that’s the real secret.

#12 days of anime #devilman #devilman lady

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caelanglang · 11 days

Note

Who are your fav skk fanfic writers and why? Do you have their works that you love the most that you don't mind sharing here? 💘

this... this is such a hard question, *brings out a whole safe of records* /j (no srsly it's gonna be a long read--)

Here are a list of authors i really like :3 Their ao3 links/handles are:

the_most_happy: love how emotional their work can be! they have smut and fluff works, and most of all—which i think the the most delicious one, is the way they write angst <3 I actually made a bunch of fanart for their fics/aus when I was just getting into the fandom :3 They're writing is like going into a spicy sexy emotinal adventure... idk how else to describe it xD my fav fic of theirs... augh so hard to choose... In Loving Memory caught me so off guard (cuz i forgot to read the tags and immediately dived into it the moment i saw their post about it hhhh)

forest_racoon: The fluff and softness and magic in their writing is so good! I love the energy and comedy and seriousness and everything in their writing! it's always so fun to pick up any of their works~ Don't be tricked tho,, the angst they deliver have the same gravity ToT it's just so... augh... I first found them through Plate :( and have reread it several times (please check out their other works too it's all so amazing!!)

devilrin: love how she writes. period. the emotions and the poetic energy of it?? the angst?? so. good. the skk energy in their writing is more mellow(?) it feels more realistic—it's like watching people instead of characters ;w; (very cool how she world builds an entire life outside of her fic for her characters actually, got to witness the behind the scenes first hand myself its pretty insane to me) The fic that ruined me tho is Down to a Sunless Sea (which is so angsty im so--)

themadtree: The energy in their writing is just so amazing. it's very hard to stop mid-way! The dialogue feels very fun and engaging and you really get very attached to the characters because of how energetic and full of life they are. Whimsical is the best word I can think of to describe the reading experience of their work :3 They made a bunch of fun aus; their brain is just so amazing (pirate au and avatar au like broooooo) My favorite is Mors Vincit Omnia (yummy pirate au!)

StarshipDancer: one of the first ao3 writers whose name i decided to remember by heart (which means a lot considering how bad i am with names) because they are my most searched user in ao3 xD The fluff is just so addicting. The sillies and shenanegans are so on point for me, idk it just scratch this itch so perfectly in my brain. I draw a of inspiration from my skk sketches from their works actually :3!! READ EVERYTHING THEY HAVE PLS ITS ALL SO GOOD (you should check the fluff week collection augh) Without Words is one of my most reread ones... I think... I reread a lot of their works tho...

setosdarkness: let's be honest. i think everyone whose dived into ao3 skk just knows her alreayd xD she's such a kween for that, making sure we are so well fed with so much fun skk writing. Her works are so fun to read! Very comedic and has such similar energy to the gag moments and bickering and shenanigans of the anime skk for me idk why. I love how fun and unique each fic scenarios are :3 (no srsly you'll never run out of food made with so much love by athina-san)

xLillyle: I am working with Lilly for a Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood skk au!! (its Royai skk BUT it's also beast!skk) it's been so exciting to work with her :3!! You can check some of the teasers here. She made an iwaoi!skk fic recently so if that's you're type hehe *starts bawling*

there are lots of other amazing authors there but these are the ones that came to mind and i am most familiar with for now :3 Here are some other fics ~~

When I Awake: Ghost(?) Writer Dazai and Musician Chuuya. yummy angst. silly skk

castle out of couches: My favorite domestic fluff skk. it's my must read. Halfbloom is such a master of the fluff in comedic tone and capturing that skk domestic softness idk how they do it. it's just so good.

In One of the Stars I shall be Living: A sweetheart wrote a fic about my little prince skk au TT it's so well written and I am so in love with all the references and angst ueueue

Five Steps: My favorite skk knight x prince au TT

The Best Worst Thing: Another sweetheart wrote a fic based on my silly sketches ;w; it's so cute waaaaaa

okay. i am. so sorry for the long answer. I just love a lot of stuffs from these incredible writers. feel free to drop by again :3 these are the ones that comes to my mind first so i may have missed out on a bunch oop

#sorry again for the long reply #bsd fandom has so much good food #inbox #recommendations

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seresinhangmanjake · 7 months

Text

Beyond the Hills: Part 4

Jake Seresin x Reader (College AU)

Main Masterlist, Beyond the Hills Masterlist

Summary: Technically, you and Jake Seresin have known each other for twelve years. All throughout your childhood education, you and Jake shared classes, lunch periods, homeroom teachers. It seemed if the opportunity for you to be in the same space arose, the universe made it happen. But you were not friends. Not enemies, either. Not much of anything to one another outside of the occasional class project partners. When high school ended you assumed you wouldn’t be seeing him any time soon, but then you find yourselves at the same college, and once again, forced together. It seems no matter where you go, Jake Seresin is there. But you are not the shy girl you were in your youth. You want to try things now; party, have fun, do things you’ve never done before, and suddenly, for reasons you don’t understand, Jake seems to take issue with your new choices.

Notes/warnings: just cursing, I think. Likely typos. I know people literally just voted for the second part of the Oh, Baby AU to be posted next, but this was almost done and I got a sudden burst of inspiration to finish it.

Words: 1300

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“So are we going to talk about why you’re being weird or are we ignoring it or…what’s the plan here?”

Jake was trying to drown out the noise—the hundreds of jumbling thoughts in his head, each containing a question that led to the same answer: He liked you. He wanted you; enough to have the prickling sensation rise over his skin that said it might even be more than that. He couldn’t deny how he sought you out, catching himself walking to the campus coffee shop he knew you frequented, or considering attending the senior art exhibit because Lydia had mentioned you’d be there. Maybe it was because he needed you, in some way. He didn’t want to need you, and unlikely was it that you wanted to be needed by a man you barely knew, but he couldn’t stop himself. It was a craving. A yearning for something sweet and gentle and wholly unique, unlike anything else. And that’s exactly what you were. Unlike anything else. Special.

“Not answering me is only adding to the weirdness,” Rooster said, snapping his fingers from across the room, hoping the high-pitched sound might draw his roommate’s attention. “Did you hear me?”

Jake finally raised his forearm from his face where it had been resting to block the light from the sun, and sat up in his bed. His heavy inhale was a relief, as if he hadn’t been breathing quite right and just didn’t realize it until he made the conscious effort.

“I heard you,” Jake said, running a hand through his hair to straighten the locks ruffled by his pillow.

“Oh, so you were just being a dick,” Rooster huffed.

“Well, maybe don’t ask questions you already know the answers to.”

“How was I supposed to know if you wanted to talk about it or not?” Rooster moved to his own bed, plopping down and leaning forward with his elbows resting atop his knees. He clasped his hands and his thumbs began a little war with one another. “I guess I won’t ask if this behavior has anything to do with her, then.”

Jake nodded and snatched his t-shirt off the floor, pulling it over his head. “Would be a waste of a question.”

The shake of Rooster’s head in response irritated Jake immensely, but he knew where the reaction was coming from, and it wasn’t exactly…unfair. “It’s been a week since the bar, man, and you haven’t made a single move,” Rooster said. It was just short of a scolding, forcing Jake to roll his eyes. “Not even a step.”

“I know.”

“Not even an ant-sized step. I mean, snails move faster than you. Snails, Jake.”

“I know,” Jake groaned. “I just—” He matched Rooster’s position but let his face fall into his hands, rubbing them up and down to try to erase the tight knitting of his features. “I think I’m going crazy." His words were muffled into his palms, then he lifted his head to meet his friend’s stare. “No, I know I am. I’m fucking insane, actually. I’m practically addicted to this girl and I don’t even really know her.”

“You keep saying that, but maybe you do.”

Jake’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “What?”

“You’ve always noticed her,” Rooster said. “She’s been in your classes for years. You know some of the things she likes, and what might make her laugh. You know that she’s embarrassed when the rain turns her hair frizzy, but you think it’s cute anyway. You know that…” He paused to remember another of many on the list of reasons. “You know she really likes strawberry-flavored things. And you know—”

"This is making me sound like a creep. How do you even know all of that?”

“You spilled it after a few drinks the other night," Rooster replied, smirking at the memory. “Look, all I’m saying is that you’ve unintentionally gathered a lot of information over the last twelve years. Putting all of that together,” Rooster shrugged, “Of course you like her. Hell, before Lyd wrapped me around her little finger even I was getting ready to like her and all I knew about her was that she’s beautiful. You know much more. So cut yourself some slack. She’s clearly a hard girl not to like.”

Understatement, Jake thought. Severe understatement. Rooster had a point Jake couldn’t deny. He had noticed so much about you—more than perhaps reasonable—and the truth was he had all the tools and knowledge to bring a smile to your face any time he wanted to. So why hadn’t he? Why had he restrained himself, and why did he still feel the itch to continue doing so?

You aren’t good enough for her, his thoughts intruded. That’s why. She deserves someone who won’t—

“Ok, why don’t you just say it out loud?” Rooster said. “You know, release it from that bottled-up, guarded portion of your heart.”

Jake knew the look on his face was suggesting his roommate was nothing short of ridiculous, but Rooster didn’t budge.

“Go on,” he urged.

The blond’s brows dipped in the center, mildly insulted. But that’s what happens when someone pinpoints one of the few things you’d rather not discuss. And it was harder knowing Rooster of all people was so easily able to do the pinpointing. The man’s brain was consistently on partying or Lydia, partying with Lydia, sex with Lydia, sex with Lydia at a party—Lydia, Lydia, Lydia—and still he had enough room in his head to sense Jake’s walls. He wasn’t intimidated by them, either. Despite how sturdy, how thick and long those walls of Jake’s were, Rooster had no issue walking right up to them, rapping on the carefully stacked stone with determined knuckles, and declaring, without any hint of gentle sympathy, that his friend was being an idiot.

Maybe he was being an idiot.

“My heart is not guarded,” Jake defended…weakly.

Rooster's look easily proved how unconvinced he was. But maybe Jake wasn’t truly trying to be convincing. It felt like lying to his father after a night getting high with his best friend back in high school. Useless. Pointless. His father could smell the weed cloud wrapped around his son, and any following words from Jake’s lips fell on deaf ears.

“Fine,” Jake muttered, his heart jackrabbiting against his ribcage. He was thankfully for that cage. It kept the organ from breaking free from his body like it felt it was on the verge of doing. Jake pushed on. He pushed through the thumping in his ears “I…I like her.”

“And all was well.”

“Shut up.”

Rooster clicked his tongue as he shook his head. “So touchy. Let’s hope if you two get together she soothes that grumpiness.”

“I’m not grumpy," Jake lightly snapped. If said by Rooster a minute earlier, Jake would have been harsher, but the weight of his confession was lighter than the denial he’d been holding on to. He suddenly found himself less angry. Less tense. “I’ve been conflicted for weeks and it’s exhausting.”

Jake would’ve said more. The relief of letting it out—however initially reluctant—coaxed him to spill more of his secrets. The tale of his past was ready to tumble off his tongue. But there was a knock at the door.

“It’s unlocked, baby,” Rooster called.

The smile Rooster greeted his girl with whenever she entered a room fell instantly at the sight of her face. The confident woman he knew didn’t worry her lip between her teeth. She didn’t wring her hands. And yet, in that very moment, she was doing just that.

Rooster rushed her way. "Lyd, what's wrong?"

She released that lip; ran her fingers through shiny platinum strands. Her sigh filled the silence in the room, then she said, "We've got a problem, gang."

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A/N: I hope you liked it :) It’s painfully long overdue, and I apologize to those who had an attachment to the series. I genuinely didn’t think many people wanted it. I’m actually really happy and thankful that you guys encouraged me to continue this. Just a little tidbit: “I’m practically addicted to this girl and I don’t even really know her” was the line this series was built around. I thought it would be fun to mention.

tags: @wkndwlff @kmc1989 @sagittarius-flowerchild @dempy @oliviah-25 @rosiahills22 @xoxabs88xox @matisse556 @hardballoonlove @ssa-sadboi @lynnevanss @pono-pura-vida @tgmreader @amgluvsbooks @ravenhood2792 @djs8891 @shakespeareanwannabe @sailor-aviator @novagreen04 @memeorydotcom