#i have nightmares abt this shit

[pneumonic-screamers]

Oh no.

#okay so this is very much a rant and it is goinbto be very misspelled bc i dont care #so bad things are happening #person who im currently hurting from most rn #is trying ro get back into my life #and i dont want him backnin my life #our friendship ened for a reason #it was toxic on both ends but the shit he did is unforgivable to me #i have nightmares abt this shit #motherfucker thought it was fine to make creeoy remarks abt me behind my back and tell our friends that he wanted #to kill my gf when we were together #and he made thise jokes to my face bc i knew he had a thing for me #and i had rejected him #a lor #and one day #he took it too far #and he wouldnt stop making thiae jokes #and then more stuff happened #like a lot of stuff #and #things got bad #and im scared #of what will happen if he comes back inro my life #ive tried to scrub every thing that reminds me of him away #and reclaim the shit he ruined for me #personal #vent post #tw rant #tw vent

[b4kuch1n]

fanciful stories (you're way too good at this)

(that's not what it's about. being good at it)

#pokemon #swsh #champion leon #gym leader raihan #assistant sonia #three parts of a whole idiot #hi. this is mostly me testing just goin at it with ink again. its wonky but! thats not what its about! #thinking abt little boy... in the arena with a set of league uniform a size too big. winning because it's fun #leon truly is like a recurring nightmare I have. every other month I wake up in the middle of the night like oh shit leon pokemon #also reintroducing the dragonfly motif for raihan... I debuted it for leon but tbh? it fits raihan better #this is like magical girl to me. the image genre of using kids toys to do archetypal hero things #man. I really need to draw a very specific thing for gloria. leon may be in it but I want it to be for gloria #we'll see! Im so fucking sleepy rn #theres a feast to be made tomorrow. I need to lay down n save up my energy for cookin #have a good night lads! remember: making bad art is fucking awesome

[time-is-restored]

btw not to make everything about My Fucking Guy but i honestly think one of the things that seperates q!phil out from the other islanders is the approach he takes to dealing with the lack of agency + control all the islanders have over whatever the fuck the federation's doing.

it shows up most prominently whenever tubbo is excitedly telling him about the 'progress' he's made with cucurucho or various investigations (ie: trapping him into a corner with the 'do you have free will' questions), and phil always shoots it down w an immediate 'that doesn't mean anything. curucuho will say anything to mess with you. you can't take anything he says as true.'

and it's not that phil is... a paticularly pessimistic character? he's just EXTREMELY practical. like, he's yet to give up on anyone EVER finding ANY answers (he was the one who initially gave the federation that one week ultimatum w the cage for a cage stream), he just doesn't trust the idea that curucuho is ever going to voluntarily give them. they're uncontrollable + senseless - you might as well argue with the weather.

and like, if that's how he sees the one (1) and only point of contact the islanders HAD with the federation for months, it explains a lot abt his characters lifestyle! ofc he sits on the wall all day, talking to his kids, and keeping his head down. he believes that the federation wants nothing more than to drag the islanders into sick games + tasks just so they can fuck with their head (ie: curucuho revealing he was the one cellbit gathered all that information for). and while he can't totally PREVENT any of that from ever impacting him, he can make sure his kids are well fed, well protected, and as happy + comfortable as he can manage. this is objectively not a perfect situation, there is a guaranteed amount of suffering + fear that he can't mitigate, but he can at least account for it.

like, he REFUSES to engage. whenever curucho shows up, he treats them with total ambivalence. he's not going to get riled up by anything they do, he's not going to get super attached to the guy, he's just gonna laugh it off and irish goodbye it when things drag on. the ONLY time he's strayed from that general guiding principle has been since he's lost his eggs, and can no longer afford to let the federation's fuckery go: those are his fucking kids.

hence the completely unprecedented levels of outward rage and sadness and terror he shows throughout the birdcage streams - almost all directed directly to cucurucho. it's all a completely fair + proportional response to the horror the islanders are being subjected to, but it feels so different bc until now, q!phil has been so dedicated to not reacting, and not giving the federation any sign that they're actually getting to him.

#qsmp #q!phil #LIKE. does anyone else think this! i genuinely believe its like one of the major #traits of his character i feel like u can trace it through Everything. #the man lives with the constant knowledge that sometimes all it takes is a tempting ravine and a badly timed creeper to end a life #whether that life belongs to a stranger or someone you love more than anything else in the world #you COULD rage against that. you could scream and shout and tear your hair out and grieve for the futility of it all #but what does that change? the days march on. death waits either way #and that's not to say he's a laizesfair kind of guy. anyone who's seen him stress out abt chayanne's risk taking + freak out #whenever his kids don't have enough autofeed grist can see that he cares DEEPLY. which resolves into his very distinctive #defensive + protective playstyle. the goal is not to win the fight the goal is to *survive* the fight etc #but the only way that mindset doesn't spill out into unchecked paranoia + complete agoraphobia is with acceptance #'shit happens: the philza minecraft story' #i also think it even manifests in the nightmare sequence w his last words to chayanne? 'they didn't want us to live. we were never supposed #to survive' or whatever the exact wording was #he is FURIOUS and deeply hurt and sad abt the deaths he says so explicitly later #but at the time the first thing he reaches for is. exhausted acceptance. it wasn't their fault. it wasn't his fault. they did their best. #they could only do so much in the face of the federation's Overwhelming Hostility. y'know? #mine

[the-meme-monarch]

actually while I'm thinking about All The Ways School Wrongs You. fuck the whole seven classes shit they make you do in like what. middle school?. do you know how many times i cried bc I couldn't find a room number. how many nightmares i had about that same scenario

#i was one of them low income families so i got free lunch ✌️ fucking hated having to run to the cafeteria so i had a chance to eat at all #bc my class before it was too far away for me to just Walk #& then in highschool when it was just four classes it was the same shit. a lot of panicking &crying every quarter when we got new schedules #STILL had nightmares abt not being able to find my classes #only saving grace schedule wise was theatre class it was right next to the cafeteria and turned out to be very fun #only other saving grace everithing-else wise was that my friends were there i miss them i wish we could hang out again #words from the monarch

[wereh0gz]

Honestly think sonic games should have more creepy and unsettling shit in them

#ramblings #sonic media in general but like mostly the games #there isn't enough #gimme more eldritch horrors #gimme more existential dread #gimme shit that's Just Scary #the end and it's whole thing of basically being the embodiment of death was good but i need More #y'know what since i'm still thinking abt metal sonic they should bring it back to do some freaky horror shit with it #please sega. do this for me #i have ideas for a creepy piece that i haven't been able to draw yet #and that's manifesting into wanting to see more sonic horror that caters to me specifically #OH WAIT sonic dream team. it's abt dreams. are they gonna do nightmares and stuff too #probably not just based on the way the game looks but i really hope it does #there's potential for good horror there

[dootplusone]

(OG post has Reblogs turned off. You can find it here!)

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Thinking. Abt this but with Bones. Like. Post-Tholian Web? Post-Mirror Mirror?

For AOS, could be after Into Darkness and/or Beyond.

A Bones who's just. So anxious. So stressed. So overwhelmed that it starts taking a toll on his health. Maybe he doesn't even realise - or maybe he does and tries his best to push through it until it knocks him on his ass. Kind of in the vein of "You don't actually know how tired you are until you stop. And then you just physically cannot start again." It becomes his new baseline, a problem that just brews and storms in the distance.

And he just carries on. And keeps going and going and going until one day he realises that 'Oh fuck, I'm not okay' and has about 5 seconds of warning before he straight up collapses, doesn't matter if it's on the bridge, in the madbay, on a planet - he's going down. (Maybe a repeat of Tholian Web where he just straight up faints into Spock's arms? Full whammy, why not)

Maybe it's a high-tension situation getting resolved that does it. The pure relief of it reminds him of how tired he is. How tired he's been for a while. His body sees that momentary rest and goes "More of that, please. And I'm not asking."

And he's so rendered by it that he doesn't grumble about being coddled like he normally would when he wakes up. He knows not to fuck with the medbay staff - they're just as firm as he is on recovery, and that's not by accident - and he knows that Spock and Kirk will be hovering, because they see any problem as something they, too, should shoulder the burden of.

...And because they're some of the most protective people in the damned universe. And that goes for pretty much all the people on board the Enterprise.

In some scenarios, it's just a case of letting his body and mind rest properly. In others, there's a lot more recovery involved than anyone initially expects. Luckily for him, he has a found family who are determined to be there with him at every step. It just takes a couple reminders, every once in a while.

#leonard bones mccoy #star trek tos #star trek aos #whump #back on my bullshit #aos bones fretting over Jim and Spock and their injuries; completely forgetting that hes also a little worse for wear #thinking back to dustykneed's post abt him being fucked up and grieving after ST:ID and. Lets just make it even more physical #After the issues they face from that; Spirk are more aware of Bones' tendency to brush things off. are more equipped to take care of him #when he needs it; just as he does for them. He's so stubbornly self sufficient and it worries them. But they're equally as stubborn and #loving. Unstoppable Force meets Immovable Object. I feel like post ST:ID is where they kind of Learn that Bones keeps shit on the down low #Because like. Bones will complain. Unless it's smth that's just affecting him. And then he suddenly keeps it to himself. When he complains #abt that whole fiasco he complains abt Jim dying. Abt Spock almost dying on that planet. About how they all almost died. But he doesn't tal #about how HE almost died from that fucking torpedo almost blowing up on him. Not a word. Jim forgot it had even happened until like. Carol #brings it up in passing. Maybe she has nightmares on the incident. But he realises Bones has just NEVER fucking mentioned it despite him #being the master complainer. That sets off the first alarm bells. And then maybe Uhura asks Jim how Bones is doing bc she knows that Bones #would just say he's fine. But Jim is like ??? Bc why wouldn't Bones be okay. And then she realises that HE HASN'T realised that Bones is th #kind of motherfucker to suffer in silence. and she's like Jim. Jim he literally ran himself to the ground trying to revive you. Jim. Are yo #kidding me have you NOT TALKED ABOUT THAT??? ANY OF IT??? Thus... Jim realises or maybe even Remembers what Bones is like #bc maybe at some point he DID know Bones well enough to know when he's fucking himself over. But all the Bullshit that theyve gone through #and the fact they work in entirely different parts of the ship kind of. Alienated them a bit. And suddenly hes like. Oh. Oh No. Oh FUCK. #because Jesus how the FUCK does he even approach this. But he manages it. And Spock gets in on it too as he slowly gets to know the doctor #And then post-beyond its like. Yeah. All three of them gang up on each other. That includes Spock and Kirk making sure Bones is as Fine as #he always says he is. #anyway. Yeah. I just think Bones probably stresses and overthinks too much but god forbid anyone comfort him. Self sacrificing bastard #wow this is a lot of alphabet soup im so sorry AHAHA

[smolsix]

so more LN III thoughts (not as many at least, read more is just for users who are avoiding altogether)

I keep thinking abt how the single player you'll be playing with an AI like LN II, and I think the game would offer a lot of replay ability if you can choose which kid you play as as they both do different things (the wrench kid has the wrench for puzzles and breaking things, and the masked kid has the slingshot). in multiplayer it makes enough sense you can pick which one to play as, but if you can choose in single I think it'd make the game have a lot more play value and that's super cool.

the fact it has online co-op can mean so much for cool additional things, and i do hope character customisation is still there (LN with Six's masks/hats and LN II with Monos also) even if you have to unlock it which would also still offer replay ability.

#i do like that the new studio whose name i have already forgotten has kept with the hidden faces theme #it feels like the game is being made by actual fans who followed the first two closely or at least did so when being handed the project #but its still got the not quite the same feeling to me but not in a bad way rn #i cannot wait to make my friends die <3333 #sixcore as it were #just a little gremlin with a wrench or slingshot here to make your life hell tee hee #im picturing LN II but in a coop setting to simulate in my little mind what LN III could be like #can u imagine doing the final run sequence when mono is getting too slow to keep up and just being on VC yelling at each other #it'd be so fucking funny i cannot wait to see what shenanigans will happen in 3 #anyways very funny i was the first time some people have heard of the new game! #i had an anon forever ago tell me there were plans for LN 3 but i wasn't following since then #i actually follow a youtube acc that posts the LN music and they started posting shit abt an ln 3 and i was like #excuse me what #i was not expecting it so soon omg #ln 3 #little nightmares 3 #text #ooc #anyways i hope they give me the ability to aggressively swing my coop friend around and launch them off of the side of buildings < 3

[izzy-b-hands]

I NEED my brain to stop waking me up with nightmares but

got 7 hours of sleep this time around despite it. I'm actually proud enough of that to post abt it lmaooo

#text post #that and i finally got my shot done #i say finally bc i fuckin forgor what day i did it last week but i think it was weekend time? #it is now lol #im gonna get myself out of bed now and get some shit done #so i can hopefully crash again tonight and actually sleep during the hours meant for it a little #nightmares or not bc at this point they are just Happening lol #i know they don't mean anything really but it does feel like a signal of what my brain is percolating on and it's like #bro wtf do u want me to do with any of the random bs these nightmares have had the ppl in them will NEVER apologise to us #can we pls get over it and stop dreaming abt things to do with them aksndjfbf

[xamaxenta]

Bc i never plan my art unless its for a zine idk how to further proceed w that gym piece i never intended for it to have a background but i felt called out by the post that mentioned the things artists who dont draw bgs/dont often draw bgs do and i didnt wanna just post another Ace art of him standing in a void but now i have to adjust the colours and most modern gyms are like greyscale with one highlight colour and its driving me insaneeeee

#like the bg will stoll be blurred to shit but im just fuuuck i already chose Ace’s colours and i like them but #😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 maybe im over thinking it too hard #bc i take so long to do lineart in general i never think abt backgrounds bc thats gonna be even more lineart which pains me further #to think about but #i do want to stage characters more and do better lighting #but im just gettin stressed bc i didnt intend for this particular piece to have a bg and now it does and its #i have to make them work now which is a nightmare #maybe i should just scrap the bg fuck #finish the shading at least on Ace move on to other stuff #i tried a ton of methods last night but nothing lmao #maybe i was tired maybe i was distracted by ear pain #hoping to get it checked today bc my jaw hurts now 😭 #and im still so tiredddd #i slept nine hours wtf #whiny xam hours im sorry #shut UP xam

[ganonfan1995]

passed out with the window open and so much wildfire smoke rolled in overnight. I'm choking and dying 😩😩😩😭😭

#everyday i wake up and see the state of global warming and get very mad #cuz i can't do shit abt the 1% and literally just have to live in the nightmare they've design for us #and now my throat hurts!!!!!!!

[wlwgang]

Guys I saw Arctic Monkeys live with my girlfriend on Friday. <- sentence that would make 16 yo me explode.

#it was so good but idk if it was bc I was so tired or so much in disbelief that it was happening I Literally. cannot remember shit from it #rip #I think my brain just absolutely blacked out every time I heard the into riffs to the am and favorite worst nightmare. god!!! so good!! #[julia Hava voice] monkys <3 #mine #music #arctic monkeys #we could’ve gotten closer if we’re weren’t stupid abt the entrance but u live and u learn and I was smart enough to have ear protection so

[daz4i]

how is it. that for a whole week. the house smelled fine, and other than some dust and cat hair it was really clean too, and everything was organized and easy to find with no towers of dishes in the sink about to topple over. even tho i didn't clean that much or do anything out of the ordinary to keep the house this way. but now my parents have been home for like 3 days and already every room except for mine is inhospitable from how bad they all smell, and there's mess all over, and the table is constantly sticky, and the sink is somehow full yet barely has any dishes in it bc the way they're organized is so ineffective, and i hate it here i wanna leave so bad

#i know i probably can't run a place in the long term on my own. but. neither can they apparently!!!!! damn!!!!!!!! #idk if it's been getting worse recently or if my patience just runs thinner lately #the way they live is just incompatible with me and my needs really #ough ough ough i need to move out. I'm so scared. but it'll be good for me probably. #I'm just fantasizing abt a clean apartment. no sticky surfaces. no bad smells. mmmmm #vent #sorry i had to clean my brain out. it did help tho. i needed to complain abt this shit 😭 #today has been awful in part bc of that. the constant bad smells that stick to everything. the inability to do things when i need to #this shit makes me literally unable to function on even the most basic levels... like i didn't really eat or move much bc i felt so bad #i have an easier time when I'm alone. life becomes easier to handle when i can do it on my own terms #but I'm so scared 😔 and I'm stressed about the process of getting there too #maybe this is the reason I'm having stress nightmares these days idk. i need to send some files for that. but I'm too scared

[semiotomatics]

slept like 15 hours, which is great, but also (seemingly) spent that entire time having one long, incredibly vivid nightmare, which is. not so great

#and the thing abt nightmares is that they stick around #even tho im awake now. i know im awake now. i still feel like im there #or i guess more specifically i still feel like the things that were true in the nightmare are still true here #namely: that i had a stage 4 brain tumour and had been given weeks to live #which. i get _why_ thats what i dreamed abt #id been looking up my recent symptoms and a brain tumour was mentioned as a potential cause uhhh multiple times #not that i actually think i have a brain tumour #i dont #but still #i guess my brain held onto it #its dumb cause most of my nightmares are simple straightforward shit like someone's chasing me n trying to kill me or w/e #or theres some apocalyptic disaster #things that suck in the dream but that are usually p easy to “leave behind” once i wake up #like i know no one's chasing me anymore bc im lying in bed not running around or hiding or w/e i was doing in the dream #but this one was so. normal #i was on _discord_ #i had to tell my _friends_ #my brain keeps trying to file it away as a waking-world memory instead of a dream-world one #not to mention it clearly wants to pick up where it left off #like no. you dont have to tell me what wouldve happened next. you dont have to remind me of how i felt in the dream #_it didnt happen_ #anyway #glad i got so much sleep at least

[palebloodpresence]

what if i said my genuine opinion of "rom the vacuous spider" is that she's actually not like, peaceful because she's stupid, she's just extremely fucking chill bc she's so enlightened. like she WILL defend herself but really she just wants to hide in her cool lake world and hide dark rituals

#idk i have crazy amount of thoughts on rom lately (makes a post thats half tags) (im sorry in advance) #like that she was blessed by kos.... now how you interpret HER and her relationship w the fishing hamlet may vary but like #kos strikes me as sympathetic towards humans (who are not hunters. it is the HUNTERS nightmare. though ive always wondered) #(why are there research patients there? what did THEY do?) #(anyway. idk i like to think that rom was very kind (if a bit. dumb maybe? but like tbh thats so subjective.) and thats why kos blessed her #thats extremely cheesy and sappy for bloodborne ikik but like. ye #though ive also seen other theories on how she might have ascended that ARENT related to kos giving her eyes #or ones that focus on the cut content abt kos being ebrietas's name at one point in development #which has VERY different implications (+ tbh? more likely #ebrietas has a more confirmed affinity for helping humans and also the whole 'altar of despair' grieving #(which re the character model: tbh i think its MEANT to be rom #but they didnt design it very accurately) #anyway thats all thank u for coming to my impromptu ted talk #OH WAIT edit i forgot to add i think we should consider WHO is calling her vacuous. the brygenwerth scholars? we know SO little about #1. who she was #and 2. where she earned this title. for fucks sake shes not even that spider shaped. whos to say this moniker is accurate? #not trying to start shit. i would love her even if no thoughts head empty #but like i hc her as niceys idk

[soldier-poet-king]

Im still so upset abt my family pulling a Charlotte Lucas on me this weekend but like. It's fine. I am going to get So Buff so I don't have to hate having a soft "feminine" body and also so I'm strong enough to bear the weight of their Ongoing Disappointment (TM) about p much every single one of my life choices and also maybe my very existence

#franposting #im somehow so upset abt that #but also so happy bc im working out again and the weather is nice and i have recipes to make and fresh veg in the fridge #also im reading the gentleman's guide to vice and virtue as a completely self indulgent comfort read #and im just 🥺 #what if u were in love with ur best friend in the 1700s #and u were both boys #but also ur a little depressed and a little bit an alcoholic. and ur dad is a shitbag. #and also ur being chased by highwaymen on the grand tour of the continent. for funsies #literally. in love with ur best friend is such a good trope. making it sad queer 18th century is just. delicious #this shit HURTS and I'm actively crying #because all the bits with his dad are like. YEAH ME TOO. this is one of THE biggest sources of nightmares for me #i can never be free or honest!!! i simply make up excuses abt being single forever and ever #also bk2 is abt felicity and i love her. queen. truly. just wants to get a mans education and escape finishing school. icon #but yeah. this was supposed to be fun haha lil fluff romance with no stakes ol #just a distraction from my woes. and now im like. oh #oh shit we be in it now #dare i say..... sebastian flyte vibes of it all.... #softhearted fop alcoholic in love w ur best friend. rich brit. parent issues. really just need to love and be loved

[verycoolsnails]

YAYYY MISHA THEME!!!

MISHA 💖💓🩷❤️💕💖💓🩷💖❤️💖💓💓💖🩷💓

#i loevev them so much did you know that #currently saving up for him and it is HELL after spending it all on sparkel .so many quests and not enough timw ......... #and . ouhhh havent had the chance to talk abt . shit what is it called . lemme go see real quick . #A CHILDS DREAM . yknow that one map with the text on the walls and the melted clocks and stuff . #that was done . SO incredibly well it makes me INSANE........... #so like . im 100.1% sure the speaker (who talks abt mikhail a lot) in that room is misha. #like that IS her voice right . im not going insane #its just . auuh... the dreams (or at least golden hour) in peacony are so childlike .... like . some of the puzzles are jigsaw puzzle ; #turn into a small cartoon character ; and help the cartoon character find his cartoon gears . #and then you get to clockie . who can only be seen by someone w a childs innoence (or smth around those lines) #and that misha can see clockie . which like . cool right ? yeab. UNTIL YOU GET TO A CHILDS DREAM .. #where theres something just ... sososo off . #and its ... its just gotta be misha . its gotta be . idk if theres anything outside of main story im missing (there probably is) #BUT . augh . auf even . #childs dream still has these childlike qualities to it (the paper birds; walking on walls) but just ... more warped #(the general atmosphere of the place; the monsters even .) #the music having a music box to make the tone of the song more distressing ... how its so much more smaller than golden hour .. #aughhhhhh ... its just such a good parallel..... i could talk abt it all day really . #anyways . i WAS going to tell u abt my misha theory (which may or may not be confirmed) bu t i got DISTRACTED. #uhh anyways . my theory is that misha is somehow trapped in peacony . #when misha goes onto the parlor car they mention that theyve never been outside of peacony before and that she can t stay for long . #which i imagine is very normal! BUT its this combined w her lock motif (pupils; most of the doors in childs dream) thag make me suspicious #i mentioned before that golden hour has a very childish quality to it. and that misha has that childish quality. #okay well . what if mishas being kept there so that golden hour can keep on being a dream for other people? #and so that would make golden hour mishas dream. (or part of his dream? could be more people the familys keeping) #and that would imply that childs dream is . well . mishas nightmare . #uhm . i think thats it ..? if i come up w anything else ill . ramble abt it somewhere . definitely not the most eloquent but #i hope i got the point across <33 #i think its an understatement to say i love misha . i LOVE MISHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA