#i feel better after typing it out honestly

[dreamauri]

♪ — 𝗪𝗜𝗥𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗡? - part two max verstappen x reader (fluff) “. . . when he wants to be normal, he can count on you, stranger.”

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“Come on, you can’t say he has so much potential!” Max miserably tried to hold in his laughs as you continued your rant about how much better Max would look if he put a little more effort or thought in how he dressed. 

“I’m honestly starting to think he’s allergic to wearing anything . . . not Red Bull related. Like even in his streams! In his home!” 

Sitting in front of his laptop with a makeshift setup in the hotel room in Japan, Max found himself unwinding from the earlier media day when he gladly accepted to join you for a game of Fifa. It wasn’t until someone brought up Lewis’ outfit from this morning did you start your little ted talk. 

“La, please concentrate on the game, we’re losing!” he couldn’t stop laughing either so your team was toast either way. 

“No, because I bet he's wearing his Red Bull shirt right now wherever he is.”

The reason why Max was no longer able to hold it together was because he was indeed in a Red Bull shirt. He might actually take you up on being allergic to anything not associated with Red Bull.

“I’ll gladly design a few outfits for him, I swear!” 

“La-” Max put his face in his hands, shoulders shaking from laughter as his screen showed the opposing team scoring a goal. The dutch would usually feel frustrated if he were to be losing a Fifa game in any other situation, but not this one with you.

He's ready to lose and lose again, even give up his title as one of the world's top twenty Fifa players if he gets to spend time with you like this, laughing and joking; forgetting the world around, so it's just you and him.

Just two people . . . being people.

★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Since I have no one to show, you're stuck with me.” 

It’s kind of been a routine now, having a private call after a game or upon finding spare time. You two have gotten close. You even considered “amilian” to be a close friend, per say. A close friend who you regularly vent to about work or just randomly ask riddles or dad jokes to bother.

You enjoyed his company. He was a fun person to be around. He made you feel . . . yellow in a type of way too. You never felt left out or unheard. He always had time for you, it's like you were maybe gravitating to being more than close friends . . . it's not like you can do anything about it though.

Surely people make close friends online all the time. 

You stay up on your couch, scrolling through the settings of your laptop to show and rant despite having to get up in the morning. Max crossed his legs on his chair folding his arms and watching the screen as you messed around on your shared screen.

“La, it’s late.” He’s been trying to tell you for the past 10 minutes. It’s 6:30 in Japan, 7 hours ahead of the time in Paris, where you were. 

Not that he’s keeping track of the time where you were, it’s just that you shared the same time zone as Monaco, and he only had the GMT+2 clock displayed on his home screen because he needed to keep track of his cats . . .  not too make sure you got enough sleep or anything of that sort.

“It's only 11:30,” you shushed, pulling up pinterest. Max hung his head, trying to hold in his smile. “I could put together a whole outfit that would suit him right here and now,”

“La,” Max giggled watching you actually start to search and put things together. “I’ll make a deal with you, if you go to sleep, I'll try to get Max Verstappen in baggy jeans,” 

“WHAT?!” the blond flinched at the loud noise, looking around his hotel room to make sure no one heard anything -- despite him being alone. 

“You know I work in F1 right?” Max followed up, trying to hold in his smile at your silence. “La, you forgot?!” 

“I’m sorry!” you pleaded, holding your hands in a begging motion despite him not seeing anything.

Max put his hand on his chest and pretended to be offended when he was smiling really wide to the point his cheeks hurt. “My best friend doesn't know what I do for a living,” he gushed in fake hurt. 

Your mind blanked at the title. Best friend? 

“You do know what my job is, right, La?”

“. . .” You looked away embarrassed, you’ve known the guy for how long and don’t even know what his profession is. 

Max couldn’t stop his giggles. “Go to bed, La. I’ll get Max in baggy jeans for you.”

★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Hey um, million?” 

“I thought I told you to go to bed?” Max chuckled, crouched in front of his suitcase, digging through it in hopes to find a pair of baggy jeans or a white shirt that he probably doesn't own. 

“I am in bed technically . . .” The blond looked over to his laptop on his desk, the call still going. “You work in F1,” Max felt his heart jump in anxiety for a second, there's no way you figured him out. 

“Yeah?”

 “Well um . . . my boss chose me to go see how things were going with McLaren at the Monaco gp,” 

The dutch perked up at your announcement. “Really? That's great!” 

“Y-Yeah, it is,” you stuttered, agreeing. you crossed your arms, looking at the email congratulating you on your phone screen. “I mean, I'm glad, this is an experience of a lifetime. I get to drag along a few interns with me as well.” Max frowned, your tone did not match with the news you were announcing.

“What's wrong?” He got up, sitting on the desk chair, looking at your profile picture, the concern was clear in voice, as if you could feel him sitting beside you on your bed and gently rubbing your back to comfort you. 

“Well, I don't have anyone to go with - the interns don't count . . . and I don't know anyone in Monaco or the attendees-- except you technically . . . I haven’t been on my own for that long before,” you sighed.

Max furrowed his eyebrows, trying to decipher what you were asking of him.

“Is it-” you cut yourself of with a sigh. “Can I hang out with you sometime? During the weekend?” Max stayed silent, feeling his heart pounding to the point he was scared the organ would explode out of his chest. 

“I mean,” Max cleared his throat to hide the crack in his voice that arose from the anxiety he was drowning in. “I’m not traveling with the team every weekend, so I'm not sure if I'm going to be in Monaco . . . I’ll have to ask my boss.” he replied quietly and slowly, trying to comfort you still. “There’s still a few weeks before Monaco, so . . . I don’t know for sure.” He whispered, scratching the back of his head.

He was digging himself a grave. Asking Horner if he’s going to be in Monaco when he is the driver and already lives in Monaco? It’s too late now to be honest about who he is, he dug this hole himself and now he’s stuck in it.

It’s not like he can be like ‘oh, yeah of course you can hang out with me. Oh, I’m Max Verstappen by the way, the guy who’s driving the best car and winning all the races, so I can get you VIP tickets and a hot lap too if you want.’

“I’ll try my best to be there,” the blond whispered. You could almost feel him brushing your hair comfortingly. “We can get ice cream or go sightseeing. I know this really good cafe you’ll like . . .” Max will just have to keep digging his hole.

proof reading credits to the lovely and amazing @classiclitfreak <3

#‧˚⊹🪴 ଓ :: 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀 ‧₊˚⤾ #🐈 ﹒wired in? ﹐♫ #max verstappen f1 #max verstappen #max #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen x you #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula 1 #formula racing #mv1 #mv33 #max verstappen fanfic #mv1 x reader #mv33 x reader #mv1 fic #mv33 fic #max x reader #max x you #f1 fic #formula one x reader #formula one

[serverusslaype]

Shameless, pt. 15

Severus Snape x professor!reader fic

Shameless Masterpost

hey guys.................. dont kill me. i'm so sorry for the incredibly lengthy hiatus.... i had no motivation, each time i opened the file to type i'd type a couple words, maybe a paragraph and close it. i finally found the motivation to finish this chapter recently, i'm hoping it stays. it's been a rough couple months, so hoping this can help me feel a bit better!!

i felt really guilty for sort of abandoning the fic where it was, but i couldn't force myself to write anything, there was no creative juice, i think i sort of burnt myself out. and for the previous posts saying i was back, i thought i was, but i'd have the smallest spark of inspiration and try to write, but then nothing happened, and i felt bad so i didn't want to say something like, sorry, i lied. :(

hopefully this chapter is okay, i know most of you won't like it, but i'm so glad i finally finished it, it was one of the hardest to write because i had so many ideas on how it'd end and effect the whole story itself, so i had to make sure it made sense.

i can't believe you guys are still here after so long, it made me emotional to see all of your asks and comments and likes, i was just floored to be honest, so thank you so much for your unwavering support. i love you all so so much. honestly. holy shit. this has been a journey. <3 i hope you guys are all doing brilliantly.

warnings: lack of snape, swearing, mentions of adultery, slight domestic violence, verbal abuse at the end

You didn't know where to go. You felt... lost. You couldn't exactly go back to your quarters, not with Ben there, you didn't need more questions about why you were crying your eyes out at this time of night. It's not like you could tell him the truth.

So, you did what anyone would: go for a midnight walk. Well, at least that's what you thought anyone would do when they had nowhere to go. You'd hoped that the fresh, cold air would soothe your burning lungs, and the gentle breeze would dry your teary eyes. In an even deeper, darker part of your mind, you also hoped that Black would find you. Perhaps that would make everything... easier.

With tears still streaming freely from your eyes and heavy feet, you padded towards the large, magnificent doors that led to the outside with your arms wrapped around your body tightly; trying your best not to breakdown until you were alone. Your hands were still shaking as you pushed them against the doors, opening it a tad as the cool wind blew through the crack and into your face. You gasped a little at the sharp breeze, but nonetheless you slipped out, and made your way into the courtyard. The temperature was a little more biting than you had anticipated, and so you squeezed your arms around yourself a little tighter, walking towards the infamous wooden, crooked bridge.

As you sauntered through the courtyard, the only noises you heard were the owls hooting in the distance, the gentle breeze brushing through the burnt-amber leaved trees and the faint clack of your heels against the cobblestoned ground. In all honesty, it did feel a little eerie to the say the least, but at this very moment that was the least of your worries. All you wanted was a little time alone to cry, or grieve what could have been with ...Severus.

Gods, it hurt to even think his name, let alone speak it.

You reached the wooden bridge, and you stopped in the middle of it; leaning against the intricately carved columns to gaze out at the highlands. The moonlight casted a gorgeous glaze-like reflection upon the Black Lake, and it twinkled beautifully, almost hypnotising you like an illusion. Your eyes flicked up to the moon and glanced around it, staring at the glittering stars surrounding it like a perfect painting. Only times like this did you miss teaching Astronomy. As your mind reeled back to your first year teaching at Hogwarts, you relished in the time where you did not know the man named Severus Snape, and suddenly your heart sank in your chest like an anchor dropped at sea. You were so naive back then, unknowing of what was to come.

As the memories of you and Severus flooded your mind like a dam breaking, you let yourself cry. You could still feel his lips on yours, his fingertips gently tracing the curves and grooves of your skin, the words he'd whispered into your ear - it was all there, stained on your skin, like a tattoo - or perhaps a branding. And now you had to live with it. You weren't sure if you'd survive this time, especially not with how deeply you felt for him. You were torn between pretending he didn't exist and trying to talk to him, perhaps even telling him how you felt, but truth be told you were petrified of how he'd react. Would he even look at you again with those glittering black eyes you'd come to adore so hopelessly? Would he dare speak to you again, knowing that he'd charmed you? Maybe he'd relish in the fact that he'd done so, take pride in bewitching you, and make you hurt for it. You knew Snape could be rather cruel, your school days here with him as your teacher was enough for you to know that.

All these unanswered questions swam through your head and you felt yourself becoming suffocated from them, and it suddenly felt as if your lungs had filled with water, drowning you. You sobbed helplessly as you slid down the wooden wall behind you with your hands against your face, the rough edges scratching your back through your clothes rather uncomfortably.

"Y/N?" A voice came from beside you, and you froze. You turned your head away from them and quickly used your sleeve to wipe your eyes, drying the tears that had fallen from them. Only one person has a voice as soft as the one you had just heard.

You gave yourself a moment to gather yourself before even attempting to use your voice.

"Hello, Remus." You croaked quietly, sniffling.

"What on Earth are you doing out here so late?" He questioned gently, and you heard him take a step towards you. "Are you alright?"

"Quite dandy," you sarcastically quipped, sighing deeply, "I'm brilliant..." You turned your head to face him, and immediately, his face softened at the sight of your own. You were sat up against the side of the bridge, knees up against your chest and your arms wrapped around them; nose and eyes red, wet with tears. Remus quickly dropped down to his knees beside you, placing a soothing hand upon your forearm.

"What happened?" Remus asked, careful to keep his voice quiet and soft. With empty eyes, you stared into his worried ones, and instantly you felt terrible. The last thing you wanted was people worrying over you.

You looked away, down at the ground. "I..." you mumbled, sighing, "it's a... long... story." You spoke slowly. From the corner of your eye, you saw a small smile quirk up on Remus's lips.

"I've got time, my dear." He replied as his thumb brushed your forearm, silently encouraging you to talk. You felt at ease in Remus's presence, it was almost like he had a calm aura around him, and naturally your body relaxed beside his. You took a deep breath.

"Erm," you choked, sniffling again, "it's Se... Snape." You couldn't bring yourself to say his first name without crumbling into a million pieces.

Remus let out a gentle breath. "Snape, of course," He tutted, glancing between you and the ground. "What's he done?" The fact that Remus reacted like he had expected Snape to have hurt you, further broke your heart. Were you the only one to have seen through his icy exterior?

"Broken my heart," You laughed dryly, and you had to fight back another bout of tears. Remus's brows furrowed in confusion at you. "We... I... Look, I'm not sure how to explain this to you. But... I fell..." You trailed off, unable to finish your sentence. Your heart hurt too much. You only hoped that Remus knew what you were about to say.

Remus blinked and stared at you, shocked. Clearly, the two of you had hidden your 'relationship' well - so well that everyone was oblivious to it. "You fell...?" He frowned.

"In love... with him..." You almost whispered, avoiding Remus's eyes. You weren't sure if you'd be able to handle the look in them.

"You're in love with... Severus?" Remus repeated, and you squeezed your eyes shut at his words. They were like daggers, stabbing your bleeding heart. It was almost like you could feel it trembling inside of your chest, begging you to free it from this cycle of torment. "But... Aren't you with... Ben? And... Severus... he's..."

"I know," you sighed, noticing his confusion, "I had feelings for Severus before I met Ben. And it sort of just, like, spiralled out of control, and now, erm, here I am- Gods, I should have just listened to Minerva, I wouldn't be here right now, hurting like this." You ranted, another strangled sob leaving your throat. Remus watched you, and his eyes softened. He felt terrible for you. "She warned me, Remus, why didn't I just listen to her?!" You cried, letting your head fall into your hands.

"Y/N," Remus whispered, reaching out a cautious hand to pry your face from your hands. With a soft gasp, you looked up with teary eyes, and he wiped a stray tear from your cheek. "We don't get to choose who we do and don't fall in love with. We follow our hearts blindly, most of the time, unknowingly." He said, and moved his hand from your wet cheek to your shoulder, rubbing it soothingly. "It's beyond our control who we love."

There was a moment of silence.

"...What do I do, Remus?" You sobbed softly, sniffling, looking at your knees.

"Have you told him?"

"No."

"I think you should."

"But what about Ben? Shouldn't I... deal with... that first?" You sniffled again. "And what if Severus doesn't feel the same way about me? Then what?"

Remus paused for a moment, thinking. You looked up at him. "What if he does?" He said, a small, comforting smile tickling his lips as he stared at you.

"Well- from the way he treated me earlier... I truly doubt it, Remus." You scoffed, glancing away from his pitying brown eyes.

Remus sighed, and you clenched your jaw. "Regret is a terrible thing, Y/N," he said, "it's such a short word, yet it stretches on forever." Your eyes were glued on the ground and your body was still, but your mind was running a million miles an hour.

You sat there in silence for a short moment, thinking deeply. Remus was right. You'd regret it for the rest of your life if you didn't tell Severus how you felt. That chance of him reciprocating your feelings was small, but it was still there. If he didn't feel the same, fine, you'd move on. Eventually. And if he did?...

"...Alright," You nodded sheepishly. "I'll tell him. I just... need to, erm, work out when and more specifically, how. Like, do I just straight up blurt it out? Work my way up to it? H-how do you know it's the right time?" You rambled with tears still falling from your eyes, glancing through them at Remus who sat beside you with a soft expression upon his features.

"You'll know." Was all he said before slowly standing and holding out a hand for you to take. Graciously, you took it, and Remus pulled you to your feet. "Feel better?" He hummed, casting a glance out at the moon, then a worried look suddenly struck his eyes. You noticed and frowned slightly at his behaviour.

The moon?

"A little." You forced a smile upon your lips, and lifted up a hand to wipe the remaining stray tears upon your red cheeks. Remus looked back at you, and returned your smile. "How come you were out so late?" You asked curiously, brushing off his odd reaction to seeing a moon.

"A walk in the night does me good," Remus shrugged, and began to walk back towards the castle with you beside him. "Clears my head."

"Ah, well, I suppose I'm glad you found me, then." You chuckled awkwardly, folding your arms against your chest.

Remus smiled at you and placed an arm around your shoulders, giving you a squeeze. "Let's get you back to your quarters, Y/N, you look like an ice block." He hummed and lead you back to the castle, but not before throwing another glance over his shoulder to the almost-full-moon.

Faint, footsteps trailed down an empty corridor, and a billowing black cape followed with it. As Severus marched, his chest felt horribly heavy, almost like there was a boulder chained to it, weighing him down. He couldn't figure out why he felt like this, and it was starting to make him a little irate. He knew it was something to do with you since it had started after you'd stormed out of his office.

As Severus was about to round a corner, the sound of familiar, sweet laughter rattled through his bones, and immediately he froze. Without a doubt, he knew it was you. Only you could have laughter that sounded like the sweet songs that birds chirped in the summer mornings. The breath in his lungs suddenly vanished and he quickly swooped himself behind a bookcase, poking his head out from the side of it to see who you were with.

The moment you appeared, that boulder chained to his chest became heavier, and he felt himself lean against the bookcase he hid behind. Severus's eyes widened as they glued themselves to the man beside you - Remus Lupin. His blood boiled at the sight.

What could have Lupin have said to make you laugh like that? He'd only heard you laugh like that when you were with him, not Lupin.

From a distance, he couldn't make out what the two of you were talking about, but it was obviously hilarious. Severus's jaw clenched as he watched Lupin place a hand upon the small of your back, guiding you.

Guiding you... inside your quarters?

Snape hissed silently to himself as he stared, his sharp and hardened eyes welded to the back of Lupin's head like molten metal. As your door shut, Snape could only huff in disgust with bared teeth. What were the two of you doing in there? It was past midnight and you and Lupin seemed happy as Larry to go into your quarters. Snape couldn't bear the idea of you and Lupin alone together - let alone the fact that Lupin had had his damned, grubby paws on you. Severus clenched his jaw in a violent fashion, very clearly upset at how you'd moved on so quickly, especially with another professor at Hogwarts. Was this your thing? Bewitch every lonely professor that you laid your wretched eyes upon and then move onto the next? Did it make you feel better about yourself in some fucked up way?

An uneasy, bitter feeling twisted inside of his chest as he pictured the two of you alone and he whipped around out of spite; the swoosh of his long, black cloak filling the silent hallway. How could you move on so quickly, so... easily? 

"Never did I think I'd see the day that someone told me they fell in love with a man like Severus Snape." Remus laughed softly as he waddled to your sofa, glancing at you as if to ask if it was alright to sit. You nodded at him.

"And yet here we are." You hummed with a flat mouth, clearly not as amused as your friend was. "Sometimes I wish I was as emotionally guarded as he was, but then I remember how bloody miserable that would be." You mumbled, earning an abrupt laugh from Lupin who'd settled on the couch with a soft sigh.

Ben was nowhere to be seen, so you assumed he was asleep in the bedroom.

"Severus is an interesting character, most definitely," Lupin nodded and you turned around, walking towards him to join him on the sofa. "And I applaud you for being able to tame him. If it's any consolation, only one other woman had been able to, though I think it was... unintentional, if you will."

"Unintentional?" You questioned, your tone curious. Though almost instantly, that curiosity was killed as the thought of Severus with another woman stabbed at your fragile heart. "Actually, I'm not sure if I want to hear this right now." A dry laugh slipped from your lips and you exhaled sharply as another wave of tears prickled at your waterline.

"Alright." Lupin said softly, taking notice of your quivering voice. He stood up with a breathy groan and shuffled towards you, slinking an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his chest. It was calming, and the way he hugged you reminded you of all the times your parents would comfort you as a child. As Lupin gave you a supportive squeeze, it was as if he'd accidently pushed the button for the waterworks - hot tears began to stream down your cheeks once again, and you sobbed quietly into his wrinkled shirt.

"Hey," Lupin sighed as he watched your shoulders shake with sorrow. His hand sat on the top of your arm, squeezing it gently: a dire attempt at consoling you. "Don't cry, Y/N, it'll pass."

"Idon'twantitto-" You mumbled into his shirt, sniffling loudly. Lupin's brows furrowed together in confusion as he paused for a brief moment, silently trying to decipher what you'd just said.

"What?" He asked gently, leaning his head down so he could hear you a little better. You lifted your head from him, sighing, another heartbreaking sniffle sneaking out of your reddened nose.

"I don't want it to." You repeated yourself, lifting a hand up to wipe your wet eyes lazily.

"I know. But it will." Lupin sighed too. "Severus is... a very... damaged man," He cringed slightly at his choice of words, but he continued, "I'm not even sure that you could help him- or fix him."

At this point, you were staring soullessly at the floor, and the only thing you could feel was Lupin's chest against your shoulders. Were you and Severus really a lost case? You felt like you'd made so much progress, he'd opened up to you, he'd... he also ran away again. Perhaps your friend Remus is right.

"I think I want to be alone." You suddenly blurted out, slowly glancing up at the professor with glossy, red eyes. Lupin blinked at you, confused for a moment, though he quickly came to. He didn't blame you for saying such a thing - you'd just had your heart ripped out, to put it simply.

Remus didn't say anything, he only nodded, offering you a kind, yet pitiful smile - and that hurt you slightly. You didn't want his pity, in fact, you didn't want anyone's pity. "If you need anything, you know where to find me." He muttered, brushing a hand through your hair softly. You shut your eyes for a moment and sighed, a small gush of guilt filling your body. Here Lupin was, trying to console you, and you're kicking him out. You hoped he didn't take it personally.

"I'm sorry, I... I just need to be alone." You quickly offered. Remus shook his head and frowned at you.

"No, I understand. See you in the morning, Y/N. Feel better soon." The professor smiled at you and this time it wasn't rich with pity, but kindness. He tipped his head at you and began to shuffle his way towards the door, opening it with a quiet creak from the oak. Before he disappeared out of your chambers, Remus turned around and smiled at you once more, slipping away.

Seconds after the door shut, a drowsy-looking Ben opened your bedroom door, popping his head out. He squinted at the bright light, clearly having just woken up. That settled your nerves slightly, since you'd just spoken about Severus with Remus, only a few metres away from Ben.

"Are you crying?" Ben yawned, his bushy brows furrowed in either confusion or annoyance - at this point you couldn't tell.

"No," You coughed and turned around to pretend to do something else as you wiped at your eyes. "I'm fine, go back to bed, Ben." A curt sigh fell from your lips, and almost immediately you heard footsteps padding closer to you. "I'm fine." You repeated, listening as his feet stopped behind you.

"What happened?" Ben asked, the tiniest hint of sympathy in his voice made you shiver slightly.

"Nothing, it was just a rough day at work, honestly. I'd rather not talk about it." Your brows shot together as you tried to keep the tears at bay, but you couldn't help but think about Severus as Ben placed a hand on your waist in an attempt to pry you away from the countertop and towards him. You didn't want anyone else's hands on you but his.

"Hey," Ben said softly, though it felt heavy in your chest. "It's work. It won't matter in a day or two." You were silent. "Y/N?"

"I need a drink." You muttered and forced yourself to look at Ben, cringing slightly as you walked past him and towards a glossy wooden cabinet in the corner of your chambers. You rarely drank, and if you did, it was to either celebrate something, or forget something.

Another uncomfortable silence fell on top of the pair of you.

"Want one?" You asked with no emotion in your voice.

Ben hesitated for a moment, his groggy eyes staring at the back of your figure, silently trying to deduce you. "...Sure."

You were going to regret this.

You'd changed into comfier clothes, more specifically a pair of forest green silk shorts and a matching camisole top. Sitting on the edge of your bed, you faced Ben as he was sat on the windowsill opposite you, nursing his glass of wine. After a few strong sips, the pair of you were chatting and reminiscing like old pals. "Remember that time when I turned Peter Kipling into a weasel in McGonagall's class?" Ben giggled drunkenly, elbowing you gently as you nodded with tears in your eyes, an amused grin spread across your face.

"Oh my- I forgot about that!" You wheezed, smacking your lips together. "Didn't you get... like... at least- like a month's detention for that?" You laughed, slurring, taking another sip of your glass of Elven wine. You winced slightly at the strong aftertaste as it burned your throat. That was to be your last drink, you couldn't take much more.

"Ohh, yeah, I d-id," Ben hiccuped, his laughter dying out as he sighed; his tired eyes falling onto you. Shuffling under his gaze, you felt slightly uncomfortable. A brief yet thick silence suddenly engulfed the two of you like a slow-burning fire. Ben stood from where he'd been sat, stumbling over to where you were, stopping just in front of your knees.

"I miss talkin' to you, Y/N." He sighed, taking his hand and placing it upon your cheek; carressing the apple of it with his rough thumb. The strong scent of alcohol on his breath made you gag a tad - you were drunk as well, but the smell of it wasn't pleasant, especially from his mouth.

Your breath hitched slightly at the sudden contact.

"..Yeah." You answered quietly albeit awkwardly as you stared up at Ben. Though, all the wine you'd consumed was making him look like someone... else - the darkness wasn't helping either, in fact it was fueling your hallucinations. The dark cast of a shadow from the lit candles behind him made his nose appear larger, and his cheekbones a little more pronounced.

Slowly, he crouched down until you two were eye-level, his hands slipping to your ankles. Your body stiffened slightly at the feeling. "Ben.." You warned, sighing as the drunk buzz and pleasurable tingle from the pads of his fingers was starting to cloud your mind.

"Whaat?" He whispered, heavy-lidded eyes still glued to yours as his fingers began to trail up your calves. Ben began to stand up slightly, pushing his face dangerously close to yours, and so you leant backwards to avoid him, your back gradually making contact with the bed. He shuffled forwards slightly, pressing a knee against the edge of the bed to balance himself.

You shouldn't be doing this, you knew that, but Gods, the alcohol was truly fucking with your morals and mind.

Would it hurt?

Just a little... taste...?

You shut your eyes as you became lost in the feeling; his fingers reaching the backs of your soft thighs, a breathy sigh falling from your lips. Slowly, you opened your eyes again as Ben's smalelr nose pressed into your neck, followed by his wet lips. You gasped as his hands found your torso, his fingers pressing a little too harshly into your flesh. 

Severus.

Memories of him suddenly flooded your mind like a reservoir breaking a dam, flushing out anything that didn't embody him. All the times Severus had attacked your supple flesh beautifully; pulling gorgeous moans from those pink lips of yours. Your brows furrowed together as your body silently yearned for his touch. It hurt.

You were stuck between stopping this and just shamelessly indulging in the dark, twisted fantasy of pretending that Ben was Severus. You were being so selfish. And yet, you didn't care, all of the emotional turmoil that you'd been through tonight was pushing you to the edge - all you wanted was the man who didn't love you, who only saw you as a quick fuck, maybe some midnight company. 

You shut your eyes again and tried your best to imagine him. With a sigh, you ran your hand up Ben's neck and into his hair, though it wasn't the same. You missed the way you'd tangle your fingers in his raven-black locks, gripping on it as he'd ravish your neck and breasts like some mad professional. Sighing frustratedly, you moved your hands down to his shoulders, expecting the rough, black fabric of Severus's robes, and yet you were met with the flimsy, thin fabric of Ben's white cotton t-shirt.

You felt so fucking pathetic.

Knock, knock.

You froze, eyes snapping open as quick as lightning. Was there someone at the door?

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Ben groaned drunkenly as he continued to kiss your neck. Unfortunately for him, the feeling had worn off the second you heard those knocks.

"The knocks at the door."

"You're.. imag-ining things, baby." Ben sighed and hiccuped once more, his uncomfortably hot breath on your neck made you shiver. At this point, Ben was much more drunk than you, and so with your remaining energy, you rolled him off of you. "Whoa- heey-!" He groaned as you slipped from underneath him, padding to the door. You didn't bother to check if he was alright, the only thing on your mind was who was at your door at this time of night.

Was it him? Did you want it to be him?

Reluctantly, you reached out your hand to open the door.

Nobody was there.

You frowned and leaned forwards, poking your head out to glance around. The corridor was empty, completely empty. That was incredibly weird, did you imagine those knocks? You sighed softly - perhaps you were a little disapppointed. Turning around, you shut the door, only to be faced with Ben sat sloppily in a chair with a face like thunder.

"Waitin' for someone?" He asked with a flat tone, his head lazily cocked to one side, still clearly drunk.

"What?"

"You know what I'm talkin' abou', Y/N." Ben said with the same tone, standing up, albeit unsteadily. You swallowed as he inched closer towards you, dragging his feet, your toes burying themselves against the hard wooden floor beneath your feet. "I know about the notes you kept. From him." He spat, pointing his finger at your face. Your heart instantly began to gallop; the pounding of its beats echoed in your ears like a harrowing scream in the night.

The notes...

"Excuse me?" You choked out, brows furrowing together in complete shock.

This was not how you wanted this to go down.

"I went through yer little drawers. In yer greenhouse," Ben scowled, his nose turning upwards in what you could only describe as disgust. "All of his little notes were perfectly preserved, and mine? Well-" Your mind was running so quickly that you could barely even listen to what he was saying - the fact that he went behind your back and invaded your privacy was the only thing sticking out to you as of right now. Your skin felt like it was on fire as the anger began to flood your veins.

"You went through my drawers, Ben?!" You yelled, shoving a finger in his face.

"That's the only thing you care abou'?! Not the fact that you secretly- obviously, have some sort of fucked up... thing for a man who treats people like they're the tiniest bit of shit on 'is shoe?!" Ben screamed back drunkenly as he bared his teeth, stomping towards you and smacking your finger away. "The fuck is wrong withya?"

You knew this could get ugly quite quickly, especially as Ben was drunk - a lot drunker than you. But at this moment, your anger was far too hot to even think about cooling things down.

You scoffed at him, your lips twitching upwards into a disgusted sneer. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Going through my stuff?!" You shouted at him, taking a step backwards as he began to get a little too close for comfort. "That's not okay, Ben!"

"How long has it been going on?" Ben asked, his tone suddenly calm. That put you on edge.

You paused for a moment, pondering on his question. It was probably best that you didn't answer that. "We're done here, Ben." You clenched your jaw, silently readying yourself for some sort of explosion.

"How long, Y/N?!" Ben yelled. The way the whites of his eyes were basically screaming at you made you feel terrified. In this current moment, there was only one pair of arms that you wish you were being held in. The man in front of you backed you up to the door, and you could only stare at him, for your wand was foolishly placed inside the pockets of your robes hung in your bedroom. Tears burned in your eyes as the guilt you'd tucked away was finally waking up and holding your body hostage with it's incredibly heavy weight. "Did you fuck 'im? Is that why ya never slept wit'me for months? Because you were too ...busy being his fucktoy?" Ben slurred, his face red and lips wet with saliva from how he'd been shouting.

"Shut up!" You cried at Ben as the tears began to break free from you and run down your cheeks like melting diamonds. This was so not the way you wanted this to go. "Please, just stop!" You were sobbing at this point as his words pierced your heart, quickly reminding you of what Severus truly thought of you.

"Oh, fuck sake, stop with the cryin'," Ben growled, drunkenly shoving a hand into your shoulder, sending you barreling backwards and into the door. You winced slightly as the bone of your shoulder blade made contact with the metal bar on your door. "Whiny bitch, yer the one in the wrong, not me!" He grumbled with a heavy sigh, turning away from you.

"Shit, Ben-" You gasped as you leaned forwards and pushed yourself off of the door, however, a sharp and excruciating pain shot across your shoulder as you tried to move it. "What the hell were you thinking?!" You whined, stumbling to the countertops of your kitchenette to lean on it. Your shoulder was fucking killing you.

"Me? What was I fuckin' thinkin'?!" A sarcastic, manic laugh fell from his lips and immediately you regretted your choice of words. The man spun on his heel, and suddenly he donned a wand in his hand. Now, you were scared for your life. "You're one to talk... you know what... I'm going to have you fired... yeah... blacklisted. From every job in this fuckin' area! That'll teach you to be a whore!" Ben screamed the last word so loudly that you were sure every sleeping student and teacher heard it. Your jaw ticked, and you had to look away, your face painted an embarrassed shade of scarlet.

Your heart dropped at his words. No way was this happening.

"You can't do that." You whispered, tears still streaming from your eyes as you stared at the ground.

"I work at the Ministry, darlin', anything is possible."

"Fuck you."

"What did you just say t'me?"

"Fuck you!" You cried out hoarsely with one hand on your shoulder and the other gripping the countertop. An animalistic like growl fell from your ex-boyfriend as he stormed towards you, fury burning bright in his eyes. He raised his wand, and you squeezed your eyes shut, bracing yourself for some sort of spell to hit you.

"Stupefy!" A familiar voice commanded, the swish of a spell following it suit. Then, a loud thud.

Reluctantly, you opened your eyes to see Ben laying on the floor, unconscious in a pool of his own saliva. Your chest heaved with fear, and you were incredibly scared to look up to see who had come to your rescue. Frozen, you stood still in your place, though you could feel your knees beginning to buckle. Within seconds you were on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, your lungs on fire from how harshly you were breathing. Merlin, you could've just died.

uh oh.. who saved her?

i'm sorry if you weren't tagged, i went through the majority of my notes and tried to find you all!! pls forgive me :( there was a lot due to my absence <3

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#professor severus snape x reader #severus snape #shameless fic #severus snape x professor!reader #harry potter #pro severus snape #professor!reader #hp #snape #severus snape x reader #severus #severus x oc #professor snape #pro snape #snape fandom #snapedom #professor severus snape #pro severus #severus snape x you #snape x y/n #snape x you #snape x reader #snape x oc #severus x you #severus x reader #severus x y/n #severus snape x y/n #severus snape x oc

[seresinhangmanjake]

Stolen Angel - Part 5

Demon!Jake Seresin x reader

Summary: You thought you were having a one-night stand with some random, normal guy. Turns out he’s a winged, demon-like stalker who has been obsessed with you for years.

Warnings/Notes: Jake is a little dark. Kidnapping. Manipulation. Obsessive behavior. Eventual smut and happy stuff. I’m sure there are typos. This used to be a different fic for August Walker, so if you see it, it’s fine. I wrote that one too.

Words: 3550

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

JAKE POV

Jake sighs at the knock on his door and sits up in his bed. It’s too early. Last night was long, watching you struggle to not verbally defy his every attempt to help you. But your wing was inflamed, which would soon lead to your back becoming inflamed, and he knows you’re intelligent but is it so hard to understand that not taking care of the injury could mean infection? Being here does not make you immune to such ailments and yet you puffed and huffed and barely held your tongue at his cleaning the area and applying a bandage with ointment. And just when you’d had a conversation with him about you being good. Terribly disappointing. You better shape up if you intend to get what you want. 

“What, Javy?” Jake calls at the second knock. 

Javy enters Jake’s room and leans against the door after closing it behind him. “So? You taking her?” he asks. 

“Possibly,” Jake says, throwing his legs over the side of the bed. “There are stipulations, but she’s determined. She’ll do whatever she has to to get there.”

Javy raises a brow. “Does that explain her cozying up to you yesterday?”

A slight smirk sneaks onto Jake’s face. ‘Cozying up’ is definitely one way to describe what you were doing the day before, although your actions were nowhere close to how affectionate you’re capable of being. There is plenty of passion in that body of yours that a few soft touches don’t do justice, but for now Jake will take what he can get. 

“It does,” Jake confirms with a nod. “She’s my clever little angel, but manipulative attempt or not, it’s not like I’m going to push her away.”

“Oh no, of course not,” Javy snorts. “You? Do the respectful thing?” With a shake of his head, he lets out a low whistle to which Jake rolls his eyes. The sarcasm in his friend’s tone is wildly unappreciated.

“Do you honestly expect any better of me?”

“Not these days,” Javy says, “but is it so horrible of me to want you to see the error of your decisions and change? When I offered you a life here you were a different man.”

A different man. A weaker man. A man who had nothing left to live for. 

Losing everything he once cared about—that is what changed him, but who’s to say the man he is today isn’t who he was always meant to be? Maybe it burrowed inside of him long ago and was waiting for the encouragement to expose itself. And what is so wrong about that? That doesn't make him a bad man. 

He was a man who was missing the drive and purpose he needed. But then—despite being under the cruelest of circumstances—he found it. And when you find purpose you have to take hold of it and claim it any way you can before it’s ripped away from you. If Javy still can’t understand that then it must be the type of thing you have to live for yourself in order to grasp how it feels.

Jake’s eyes contain a challenge against his friend’s stare as he leans forward to brace his elbows on his knees and clasp his hands. “You try having Fate fuck you over, and then we’ll see the kind of man you become,” he says.

Javy sighs and crosses his arms. “I’m not denying the poor timing of your first meeting, but you coped with that for years, and now that you’ve snapped��”

“I haven’t snapped,” Jake snaps.

“Yes, you have. She was moving up in her life, finding some happiness, trying to make some friends at a new job, and then you took her,” Javy tells him, but not to chastise. That lecture was one Jake received weeks ago and Javy knows another won’t alter what has been done. “And you can’t keep her in The Tower forever. When this catches up with you—because it will—what do you intend to do?”

“She will love me by then.”

“You’re hoping she will love you by then,” Javy counters, “And you’re hoping when questioned, she’ll lie for you.”

Jake groans and shoots to his feet, running a hand through his hair. Gesturing in the general direction of your room, he says, “If she loves me then she’ll be lying for both of us because she’ll know it’s the only way we can be together.”

“And if she doesn't?”

“I'm not entertaining ‘if she doesn't’,” Jake says harshly. “She will. I’ll get rid of that stubbornness and she’ll remember why she wanted me in the first place.”

Javy pushes up from his leaned position, nearing the blond. “She wanted you because the two of you had some kind of carnal pull to one another, but–”

“It’s more than that,” Jake stops him. “We share more than that. She just refuses to see it.”

But you will. You’ll come to your senses. He knows that it’s more than sex, but it’s because of that sex that he believes something in you felt him over the years even though you did not see him. That’s why it was so easy to come together that night. You don’t sleep with just anyone. You’re picky and careful, as you should be, but you showed no reservations when giving yourself to him. You weren’t timid when he stripped you of your clothes; you were too focused on ripping him out of his. You weren’t embarrassed by your sweet moans and pretty cries. You were comfortable around him, and you will be again. 

When Jake realizes Javy hasn’t spoken, he shoves his thoughts aside and pays closer attention to the look directed his way. It’s a medley of emotions. Skepticism and concern. Cautious hope and pity and acceptance. Acceptance of what, it’s hard to determine. Impending doom, likely, since Javy’s so sure of its inevitability.

Finally, Javy blinks. His lips stretch into a thin line, then he says, “Be smart about this, Jake.” 

And Jake replies, “I’m always smart.”

“You're not,” Javy has no shame in telling him. “That's the problem.”

—

READER POV

“You can’t speak to anyone from your past, you can’t be seen by anyone from your past, you have to stay in my sight at all times, and you can’t do anything that would jeopardize our ability to return here on time,” Jake says. “You break any of these rules and I drag you back before midnight.”

Raising a brow, you cross your arms over your chest. “You think I can’t manage that? I’ve complied with everything you’ve asked of me for two whole weeks.” 

Everything down to accepting his cupping of your cheek one night as he nearly kissed you. He hadn’t though, and his reasons for pulling back instead of taking what he wanted as he’s so used to doing robbed you of four hours of sleep.

“I wouldn’t put it past you to go rogue,” he says. “But you can’t. There are actual consequences I can’t protect you from.”

Yes, you know. He has mentioned that often. “Consequences, Angel. There are consequences to not following the rules.” For the last couple of weeks, it has felt like hours upon hours of the same droning on, the same lesson as if your short-term memory is flawed. But then he’d thrown in “It's your first time, and there’s a chance you’ll forget everything I’ve told you the minute you touch foot down there. You’ll be tempted to break them.” 

That was what finally struck a cord of concern.

Of course, it had crossed your mind to break them, even though you’d known of Jake’s fate when he had done the same, but if he had to warn you of the temptation, you wondered how tempting it would really be. Would you be spending your precious, limited time there miserable because of the invisible chains on your wrists and ankles and the gag in your mouth as you try to resist the desperation to bond with the life you left behind?

“How tempted?” you had asked. 

You were taken aback by one look from him. A harshness was in the green, but you are no fool, and you could see exactly what it was concealing. A memory—pain. 

“Incredibly,” he’d told you. “At least, I was. And I paid for it.”

You hadn’t responded, but you kept his words in the back of your mind, ultimately deciding to trust in your strength. It was either that or risk never seeing home again, and that wasn't, and isn’t, an option for you. 

“I’m not going to do anything, Jake,” you swear. 

He peers into your eyes a little too long, but you let him search for the lie that isn’t there until he’s satisfied. He blinks and then gives a sharp nod. “Good,” he says. “Then close your eyes.”

“What?”

“Close them,” he repeats. “You don’t need to know how to get where we’re going.”

Another thing to comply with. Rolling your eyes, you drop your arms to your sides. Jake pulls a blindfold out of his jeans pocket and folds it in thirds. 

“Seriously?”

He looks up and steps closer. “Close, your, eyes,” he instructs again.

With a sigh you do as he says, then he wraps the fabric around your head, tying a little knot in the back. 

“This is–” Stupid, you were going to say, but you’re cut off by the yelp that escapes your throat when you’re suddenly lifted into his arms, your legs and wings draped over his forearms. 

“Hold on Angel,” he says. 

Your hands clasp behind his neck. “Yea, no kidding.”

When he shoots up into the air, you have to tuck your head against his t-shirt to block out the rush and whirl of wind that’s quickly encompassing you. It’s all too fast, the pressure much too extreme that you feel as if you’ve gained thirty pounds in ten seconds. It’s the initial take-off of the rollercoasters at the theme park you went to as a child. The kind of feeling that locks your limbs in place. 

However, it’s not long that you’re going up before you begin to fall back down at a speed that suggests the man holding you can’t fly and you’re about to greet the end of your life. The sharp change in movement twists and curls your insides. Your lungs are confused, unsure whether inhaling or exhaling would better suit you at the moment. You don’t know, so you don’t breathe. 

Jake lands with a thud and sets you down on wobbly legs. One large hand wraps around your upper arm; the other slips the blindfold over your head and back into his pocket. You’re well-hidden behind a large tree as your eyes adjust to the bright neon lights that bleed from the city night.

Home. You’re home. You’re at the far end of a sidewalk by the docks that no one visits after six o’clock in the evening, but it’s still home, and you already feel yourself being sucked in by the central bustle of bodies and cars. 

You take a step forward, much weaker than you intended, and Jake’s grip on you tightens. 

“Not yet,” he says. “You need to shed your wings.” 

That detail had escaped you, the excitement too overpowering. But you keep that excitement from showing on the outside, just as you had when he’d told you a few days ago that removing the wings was possible for you, too.

Standing taller, you prepare yourself for more instructions.

“Close your eyes again,” he begins, his voice a deep vibration in your ear. “Clear your mind. Create an image of your wings and the feathers plucking free, falling to the ground one at a time until you have no more. Picture the bone and cartilage crumbling,” he says. “And keep doing that until you feel the loss of the weight.”

It takes at least a full minute, but you’re lighter. When you look down, your feathers coat the ground, a few layered with his. Like ash and snow. 

“Good,” he says, but his tone doesn’t match the praise. It’s the slightest bit wounded as if he’s grieving something he held dear. 

You turn your head. Your eyes flick to his and you find them glued to your back—your back which is now bare of the one thing that shows the world you’re something other than human. 

His Adam's apple bobs. “Let’s go,” he says. 

“Where can we?”

“Anywhere that keeps you from running into someone that would recognize you or would’ve been concerned about your sudden absence.”

That definitely knocks out work, the old late-night cafe you used to frequent, the park on third—too small. But as far as you know, everything else is fair game. And if it’s not, you’re sure Jake won’t hesitate to inform you.

—

The temptation he’d warned you about isn’t as aggressive as you anticipated. It’s there, for sure, but you don’t find yourself itching to be bold. There’s no one you wish to see, and you skirt the perimeters of the locations you choose because of the thought that you might fuck up and give him reasons not to bring you back in the future.

He should be thrilled with your behavior. He should be riding one of his ego trips from getting you to do what he wants without additional scolding, but that’s not what’s happening. Instead, he’s worse by the hour. 

Occasionally his eyes light up when you smile or chuckle at the places and things you haven’t seen for the month that has felt like a year, but between your grins and laughs, his face hasn’t once failed to fall. 

He has taken to trailing behind you. If both hands are not in his pockets it is because one is running through his hair or down his face. To your statements, he hums. To your questions, he mutters answers. He hates it, you realize. All of it. Almost as much as you hate the place he has forced you to exist in ever since he took you.

His mood is only exacerbated by your desire to go to your apartment.

“Can you hold this?” you ask as you raise the window. “Won’t stay up, and maintenance ignored all of my requests.”

Jake nods, placing his hand on the base of the sill so you can ease yourself through the opening. You do the same for him as he steps off the fire escape onto the ragged carpet of your living room floor. 

You take in the space, and it’s so…weird. Not a thing has shifted from the place you left it. The only additions left out of the memory you’ve kept in your mind are the layer of dust coating every surface and the slip of paper under your front door with Eviction Warning written in red lettering. And the smell. It doesn’t smell like you remember. You’re not immediately soaked in the scent of lavender essence left over from the half-burnt candle on the side table.

“Feels like I’ve been gone forever,” you say. You look over your shoulder at Jake. “Does time move differently there and I just didn’t notice?”

His hands are back in his pockets. His eyes are tired. “No, Angel,” he says.

Your sigh fades into a hum. 

As you move about the room, you measure it all with your eyes.

Your couch. You always sat on the right. That cushion is more worn than the other two. 

The lampshade is still crooked from when you last changed the lightbulb. Its poor alignment had caused a slight burn mark in the material from the shade leaning against the heat of the bulb, and yet, rather than straighten it out, you had twisted it on its diagonal axis so the mark faced the wall.

The TV remote is nowhere in sight, of course, because you were never the best at remembering where you put it down; a habit so frustrating you’re tempted to hunt for it now. 

Your coffee table still has the scratch in the middle from when you’d dropped your mug onto the wood, shattering it to pieces. That had pissed you off. You’d just bought it from the flea market.

A mug—you’d left one out that morning. You turn your head to your kitchen where it still sits on the counter. 

You walk over and grab it. There’s a coffee ring in the bottom, so you take it to the sink and wash it out, then flip it over to dry on a dishcloth. You weren’t a fan of leaving dishes scattered about, even for half a day, but you don’t know why it ever mattered. Since moving in, no one had entered this place but you, and well…him. 

Suddenly, something deep and thick descends upon you. Though the space around you appears to have frozen in time from the moment you disappeared, there are things that did not freeze along with it that you can’t ignore.

Like the food in your fridge and the special chocolate cookies in your cabinet that the grocery store rarely had in stock. Rotten and stale. What a waste. 

There’s a plant in your bathroom—a little one that relied on your sense of responsibility to keep it alive. It sits on a shelf in a dark purple pot you’d found on sale and now brittle leaves surely litter the tiles. 

And, oh god, the cat. You used to leave a bowl of tuna out for the stray cat that climbed the stairs to paw at your window. What about him? Is he ok? Did he give up after being ignored? How long did that take? Did he feel abandoned? Does he miss you?

Bracing your hands on the counter, your head falls forward. You close your eyes and take a breath, and then you open them and—Fuck, there’s a cheerio on the floor. You forgot the damn cheerio; that tiny ring of processed wheat from breakfast that has been hanging out here in limbo wondering if it’ll be trashed or devoured by ants because you were running late that morning and told yourself you’d throw it out later but you didn’t and so there’s a fucking cheerio on your floor. 

You can’t look at it, but then you don’t know where to look, or what to do. You don’t dare go into your bedroom. The sheets will be rumpled. Your underwear will be wherever it landed when it was taken off your body and tossed aside.

Shit, the laundry! You forgot to take it out of the washing machine. Mildew probably grew in the creases and folds. They'll have to go through the cycle again. You'll need detergent. You're out of detergent—used the last of it on the load that needs to be rewashed. Your favorite t-shirts are mixed in there somewhere. But it’s fine. You’ll do a quick wash, quick dry, quick fold, and put them in the drawer where they belong. How long could that take? An hour? Two? You have enough time, right? And while you're at it you really should set some tuna out and get rid of the spoiled food and fix the lampshade and find the remote and apologize to the plant and–

“We can pretend, Angel,” Jake whispers from behind you, making you jolt in your spot. You didn’t hear his approach—he keeps doing that—and he’s so close that his breath flutters wisps of your hair. “Forget everything, for a bit. Be the way we were that night.”

His disruption sidetracks you from the laundry, the cheerio, the cat, the plant, the food. For a second, you can barely process his words, but it doesn’t take long for the confusion to sort itself out.

You swallow. “I thought I wasn’t allowed to be human anymore,” you whisper, reminding him of what he has drilled into your brain again and again and again.

“You’re not,” he says. Then his arms are flanking your sides, palms pressing into the edge of the countertop. “But we look the part, don’t we?” Hot air is on your neck. You think you can hear his heart thumping. “Just tonight. Just here.”

Just here. Here, the last place you were before he made you into the creature you are. Here, the last place you can say that you were entirely you. Here, the last place you spent a happy moment. Your final happy moment. A moment that included him, back when you believed you were bringing home some guy. Just some guy. A beautiful guy. A human guy. 

You liked that human guy.

You miss that human guy.

Sometimes you wish he'd show up again. Save you and promise you it was all a nightmare.

“Why?” you ask.

“Don’t ask why,” he answers. “Just tell me yes.”

And because you don’t want to go back to thinking about what you’ve lost; because you’re uneasy and overwhelmed and numb and weak now that you're realizing home really isn’t home anymore but a ghostly echo of who you were, you don’t possess the mental wherewithal to care about your decisions. All you want is a memory—a good memory—within your reach. 

So you turn yourself right around, and you kiss him.

#jake seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin x reader #top gun maverick #jake seresin fic #top gun #jake hangman seresin fic #top gun hangman #jake hangman seresin x y/n #demon!jake seresin #tgm fic #tgm #jake seresin x you

[assistant-of-drama]

Assistant Noah's World Tour!

After Amazon...

Noah refuses to speak to him.

He won't even look at him.

It was driving Alejandro crazy and he doesn't know why.

He would rather get insulted or have hot coffee splashed in his face again, then deal with the silence.

The assistant knows that Alejandro had almost left Owen behind on purpose and has been ignoring him ever since.

Although Alejandro didn't show it, a mixture of guilt and confusion was swirling in his heart like a storm.

The charmer knows that Noah didn't like it when Alejandro left Bridgette stuck to a pole to freeze, but this time Noah seems to be actually outraged at what happened to Owen, even though the smaller man won't say anything.

His silent glare says enough.

Was... Noah close with Owen?

So, when Noah gave Owen that cookie, it was out of compassion and not because it was Noah's job or something?

The little porpoise was actually friends or IN LOVE with the butter-donkey?!

Why? When? How?

Alejandro needs answers.

"Hola Sierra, my former teammate, you know everything about everyone, si?" he asked, trying not to sound nervous.

Why did he feel nervous?

Sierra nods with a smile, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "Yeah, why? Do you want to know something about Noah? What he likes and dislikes?"

"Something like that... I want to know why Noah is so fond of Owen... No offense to my beloved other teammate, but he doesn't seem like the type of person that Noah would enjoy being around." Alejandro explains, hating how his voice almost sounds shy.

Sierra giggles playfully. "Isn't it obvious? Noah and Owen have been best friends since Season 1! They've been hanging out together, both before and after Noah became an assistant. They're like yin and yang. Personally, they're also my favorite platonic power couple."

Platonic. Well, that's a relief.

Because honestly, Noah could do so much better than Owen.

Oh wait, Alejandro had left Noah's best friend to get eaten by giant demonic caterpillars.

Crap.

There's got to be a way to fix this.

Because he still needs to use Noah somehow.

No other reason.

#assistant noah's world tour #assistant noah #total drama #total drama world tour #td noah #alejandro burromuerto #alenoah

[adobe-outdesign]

Has wormadam been reviewed yet?

(Mothim has already been done here.)

Burmy is a pretty fun concept. The line is based off bagworm caterpillars, which, as the name implies, build little cases around themselves using whatever materials they can find as a form of camouflage. Burmy's different cases don't affect anything at this stage, just changing depending on battle environment, but they come more into play with Wormadam later on.

Visually, I like the look of the different cases, but I find the body structure to be a bit weird, with a long structure coming off the top of the head and a vaguely beak-like mouth. It's one of those things where the body shapes start to become a bit too abstract for my taste.

autism creature

As for the cases, I find myself liking the sandy cloak form the best. The plant cloak is fine but lacks a clear structure, and the trash cloak looks nice but doesn't really read as trash (plus the fact that it's insulation raises questions, like how you're able to get this form in PLA).

Wormadam is female-only, which is accurate to actual bagworms; the females remain wingless after pupating and stay in their cases, while the males become winged moths.

I do like Wormadam's design a lot more than Burmy's. The head structure looks less odd, the long pointed beak works a lot better especially with how it pokes out over the top of the casing, and they don't have the weird "legs" that the plant and trash Burmys had. Between the three, the trash is nicest visually but still kind of struggles conceptually, while the plant is strongest overall.

Wormadam also expands on the line conceptually; the cloak is now a permanent part of their bodies, and influences what typing they become—grass for plant cloak, ground for sandy cloak, and steel for trash cloak. I feel like the steel typing's a little out of place for fiberglass installation, but then again I'm not sure what type would make sense other than normal or something.

This mechanic is my only real problem with Wormadam—the idea is that the cloak becomes part of their bodies, but it still looks like it's just inside of a cloak. I wish that this could've been reflected in the designs more, like making the cloak cover the entire body so only the eyes poke out or something. Not a huge deal, just something that might've helped it out conceptually.

Anyway, overall, some great concepts here with decent designs. I'd honestly like to see more forms in the future; now that the games are more open-world, it would be neat to get a snow cloak form after battling in a wintery environment or something.

#burmy #wormadam #pokemon #pokemon reviews

[majjiktricks]

Can you explain why you think Ocelot likes Kaz? I was always under the impression that they fought like cat and dog (sorry I couldn't resist).

this took a while to answer because i wanted to go back through some of the mgsv tapes with ocelot and kaz but. mainly, what you thought is entirely untrue. whatever antagonism exists in their relationship, it feels like the fandom has blown WAYYY out of proportion.

the ONLY point of contention i can think of off the top of my head is kaz being jealous of ocelot for knowing bb longer. in the tape where kaz is talking to zero about where bb is during his coma, zero mentions an agent who has known bb 10 years longer than kaz has, and kaz SCOFFS, like he cant believe someone would know bb better than him. but also, this tape is set almost immediately after ground zeroes, so who knows how his feelings might have changed over the years.

the only time ocelot seems to get genuinely angry at kaz is when hes accusing quiet of. well. anything he accuses her of. kaz tends to do so without any evidence, and he doesnt trust her (for justified reasons), but he also blames her for a lot of things. ocelot is the only person on mother base willing to defend her. and he never yells, he just logically rebukes and kaz is the one who fights back.

any time ocelot speaks about kaz without him present, he really only praises him. he obviously is impressed at what he and bb accomplished in founding MSF.

thats just what i can remember. going for evidence now, grabbed some of the tapes that have ocelot AND kaz in them:

Bionic arm tape Ocelot: "I couldn't get [a bionic arm] for you at the time, but y'know, now…" ocelot offers to get bionics for kaz, he wants to make kaz's life easier. kaz refuses i think out of a self-punishing sentiment, not out of resentment or denial of ocelot's help. that because all of his men died, hes not allowed to have it. and he gets heated and angry about it, nearly yelling. but then he apologizes, realizing he wasnt actually angry at ocelot, just venting.

Yellow cake and the Shinkolobe Mine tapes ocelot and kaz theorizing about why the shinkolobwe mine was reopened/being mined for uranium. the conversation honestly sounds like they could be on a lunch break just chilling.

The Children Escape tapes in [2] they disagree over who should interrogate eli. ocelot doesnt think kaz can responsibly question the kids, so he steps up to do it instead. kaz dismisses him and his expertise at interrogation because he thinks ocelot will enjoy it too much. ocelot is definitely offended, and they do argue here, but i think this is because of the topic at hand and not indicative of their other conversations.

Huey's Interrogation Tapes i think their good(ish) cop bad cop routine with huey is very funny. theyre working together to get as much information out of him as possible. and it works.

overall i think they actually work really well together. after all, they spent the time bb and v were unconscious recreating MSF from scratch. also, i think kaz trusts ocelot to some extent, going as far as to put his life on the line to distract from the hospital attack. he depended upon ocelot to get bb (venom. but. you know.) out of the hospital and to afghanistan in time to rescue him.

at the very least, they are working toward the same goals (during mgsv) and have no ideological reason to hate one another. when they DO work together, it gets results.

i cant imagine you can work with someone for years doing all that and still not have any positive association with them. kaz definitely is the type to hold a grudge, but if anything, i think thats a personal one. and im not even certain on whether or not he does hold anything against ocelot once they start working together (during mgsv at least. after the game. well. anything goes.)

was sent some additional thoughts that cover the cutscenes as well as the tapes: all good stuff here

#this is kind of a mess but. have my word vomit. #jazz noises #inbox #anonymous #revolver ocelot #kazuhira miller

[cookie-crumblr]

Can I request fem reader catching bully Ezra fucking another girl?

So i honestly can’t picture Ezra actually cheating, cheating like i can def still see him doing shady quick business deals that involve sex though for sure since he’s a bit of a big cuck himselfXD

!!!MINORS DNI!!!

Status: Dating

CW: F!Reader, reader has a vagina, reader refereed to as she/her, scent kink, cumplay, cream pies, p in v, non con, cucking, bdsm, gag, restricted movement, cutting, blood, blood loss, oral on freader, pet names (slut,good little slut) asphyxiation, hospital setting,

You were hobbling back to your dorm from class, your legs still weak from last night. Now that you bunk with Ezra it’s rare he lets you go unscathed.

He likes seeing his cum dripping down your thighs whenever you leave. Just another mark that you’re his.

“Ahh~! Ezra!!”

“Smell her! Smell her fucking cunt! Shove them in your whore mouth!”

“Yes! Oka—mmf!”

“Taste her!”

*plap Slam! plap*

You hear grunting and muffled moaning gaining volume as you close in on your partially open door.

You see them first through the crack, Ezra shoving her face down into your pillow, his hand lost in her blonde curls.

His fiery eyes shoot up and find yours instantly and he keeps your gaze as he keeps pounding into her.

“Get in here.” He sounds angrier than usual.

You squeak and get in, slamming the door behind you.

There’s a man in Ezra’s bed his hand is on his cock.

“She should already be wet, go all out.”

You squeeze your slippery legs together. “No! Ezra!!”

You’re still calling his name after all this time?

You’re back against the wall, “Can I hurt her?” He asks hungrily, licking the top row of his teeth. His body boxing you in, you see how intensely he’s breathing.

“I said all out.” Ezra shrugs lazily fucking into the broad on your bed now.

“NO!!” Your scream is ear piercing and sharp even to you.

He drags her off of the bed and puts her between his legs on her knees. She seems happy to be thrown around. Ezra watches you intently now, using her throat as his cocksleeve.

“Now this’ll be better.”

“Please! You don’t have to do this! I-I-” You babble on and on until he stops you.

This guy doesn’t look like the type Ezra usually hangs with. He looks like a spoiled rich brat. Nice hair, nice skin and smile, he’s never had to do a day of work.

Your eyes widen, as you’re brought back with the sound of his belt snapping. “Ah!!” You squeal and cover your face, frightened.

He ties the thing around your wrists too tightly, and gets another leather belt from a nearby bag. The second he ties around your head the strap in your mouth and belted behind your head.

He throws you onto the floor, “Thing is, I want to do it,” The guy smiles sinisterly over you.

You cry and scream against the belt in your mouth and try to conceal your face with your bound hands.

He cuts off your clothes with a serrated knife, and then presses it to your thigh, before ripping it through your skin there.

You feel the hot liquid flood down your leg, it almost feels cold running over your skin! “!!!!” you’re screaming so hard against your bite.

“Woah,” he stands back mesmerized by the blood spilling. He excitedly, and nervously rushes to get his cock ready.

“You opened her vein, she’ll bleed out” He says almost bored.

“Exactly…” his pupils threaten to swallow you whole.

You scream so hard your vision is fuzzy and filling with thick black splotches.

He’s gonna let you die!!

“I said be rough. not fucking kill her the second you touch her! This wasn’t part of the deal, fucking psycho freak!”

The girl was torn from Ezra’s lap, and she drops your worn, soaked panties onto the bed, “Did you fuck this up for me?!” She points at the guy. She looks hazey and not all the way there.

You’re going cold so fast and your body shivers uncontrollably, until Ezra picks you up, and gets the bindings off of you and puts his jacket over you.

He throws you more carefully than usual into the back of his beamer, and races for the ER.

When you wake he’s on the chair watching you. He’s got a new bandaid on his cheek.

You don’t know why, but you reach for it and touch him there. As if he deserves any tenderness… But maybe giving him some, will make up for never getting any yourself somehow. Maybe you’ll feel it somehow.

But your hand drops weakly, he catches it and pulls you over to him.

“What are you-!” The machines beep all around you slightly faster for a minute until you’re sat in Ezra’s lap on the seat.

“We’ll break that hospital bed if we fuck in it.”

“Ezra…”

Your wetness seeps into his jeans beneath you.

Maybe it’s the residual dizziness and the drugs in you, but your body responds to him.

He grabs your ass through your scratchy gown and drags you harder over his bulge.

“You can take s’much can’t cha?” He grabs your thigh, almost rupturing the stitches. It doesn’t hurt that bad with the meds in you.

You nod your head. Yes. You take so much all for him. “huh?”

He pulls your face up by your chin to look him in the eyes, “What does my good slut want, hmmm~ How’s bought i treat you.”

You nod tentatively, eyebrows peaking into your forehead.

He grabs your arms gently and you still jump and tremble in his grasp. “Do you want my fingers, cock? mouth?” he asks while searching your fright filled eyes.

He picks you up and sets you back onto the bed, careful of all your cords and tubing.

His face comes to your legs and he spreads them, nuzzling himself between your thighs.

He pulls up your gown and pulls your panties down and off of you.

Before you know it or how to respond or act, he’s digging into you.

“Gods!” You breathe out in a high pitched tone.

“Fuck, slut,” His gruff voice rumbles into you.

His tongue runs wide up your slit before he comes up to suck on and play with your clit. He pulls away with a *pop* before going back at it, you catch a glimpse of his glistening pussy drunk face.

Your shaking hands grip his hair, and your legs tighten around him. His tongue dips into you before he adds a finger, and then another. His mouth swirls around your clit again as his finger curl and caress your spongey walls.

He pulls away again as your pressure slowly builds within. “This isn’t enough for my good little slut, is it?” He asks and you shake your head, no it’s not! “What do you want, my hand around your throat?”

You nod, he’s being so nice~

He can’t want to hurt you that badly, can he?

Oh, but he does.

His smile spreads wildly as he reaches up to your fragile neck, and squeezes. You see spots fast.

Immediately the pressure in your core builds like a fire with gasoline being pours onto it, his fingers curl and he pistons them into you. He brings his lips back to your clit and sucks and nips and tugs. He brings you to the brink of unconsciousness, and then on that ledge is when you topple over and cum all over his fingers, he laps you up and stuffs his coated fingers into his mouth.

#my oc #yandere #oc x reader #oc x you #yandere x reader #yandere x you #my fic #tw yandere #dead dove do not eat #bully oc x you #oc smut #bully oc #bully yandere #yandere bully x reader #yandere bully #bully x victim #oc bully #bully smut #fem reader #f!reader #x reader #x oc #x you

[myname-isnia]

I really wish I had some tag I’d mark vent posts with so I could find them without scrolling for ages because they’re honestly fucking embarrassing and I need them gone

#just deleted the one from two hours ago because god. what’s the point anyway #sure I spent like 40 minutes typing all that out but I didn’t feel any better nor lighter after I was done #everything still hurts and I’m still upset and triggered to hell and back #it’s just fuel for more crying #idk why I bother with them. probably for attention or smth #if I had the time desire or energy I’d go scrolling and delete all of them but honestly I can’t be bothered #tumblr is unsearchable anyway so while remembering they exist still bothers me it’s not like anyone will find the #*them #going and deleting an old vent fic from ao3 though. now that felt good #not in the ‘I’m relieved no one will ever see it again’ sense #but in the ‘it’s not there nagging at my brain and I don’t have to crying every time I remember it exists anymore’ sense #I’d delete them all if not for the obligations holding me back. honestly #but that’s a whole other topic to cry about

[coolcoelacanth]

me starting drama in my friend group for no reason (jk theres actually many reasons)

#personal #deadass talking to them is like talking to a wall #god forbid i talk about my life they give me an 'oop' an 'eek' and then ignore me #they feel like strangers yet we've been 'friends' for deadass like two yrs at this point #i like dont even care anymore #then theyre like 'how are we shady' after i call them out #like nah im not being gas lit yall have fun tho #so rude honestly #people always got me fucked up #the worst part is they act so nice to ur face #and still invite me to hang out sometimes?? #i hate people like that #then last yr they just used me to get better grades bc i would judt help them w everything #i stopped doing that tho bc they never helped me #and im like nahhhh lmao this isnt gonna be a one sided relationship like u want #they're crazy man idk #ive had shitty friends but ive never dealt w this type of species before #anyway just ranting #like go talk in your separate group chat yall pretend u dont have #acting like im the crazy one #im not going to be gaslit by more people

[be-good-to-bugs]

never again would i like to work on Halloween

#the bin #halloween is for spending alone or for getting absolutely wrecked and being qround a bunch of people #NOT for spending at work doing work being at work stamding at work walking around all day at work doing work at work #but hey. at least it was a very slow tuesday bc everyone was busy with halloween. so ill only have 1 tuesday left #looking forward to starting my new job. i actually kinda really enjoy customer service. i love interacting with people for short time #ofc people can be mean and bad but i can deal with that just fine. i get so much out of short nice interactions and those are discouraged #where i work now. i try to be nice and have friendly interactions as much as i can because its nice but overall my experience is just around #people but not interacting with them otehr than to ask them to please move. when i do interact with people im so nice and helpful and i like #doing it but its kinda bleh. idk. i know im prob gonna hate this job a lot of the time too but id like something different. #and honestly i think itll be good for me. my social anxiety and ability to interact with people is so much better than it was before #and like. it happened so shortly after starting this job. i had to do things so i did and now i know its ok. i have a better understanding #of how people behave and react to how i am and all that stuff. and i think itd be nice to be in an environment where i can be kinda jokey #im a silly person but i think ive cracked maybe 2 jokes total while working at this place for almost 6 months #i make like 12 jokes a day at least when i interact with other people. when i talk or tjink about stuff i just make jokes constantly #but i.dont feel like i can do that at this job. the people are nice but its just a different environment and my type of humor and #personality doesnt mesh well if im joking. i work well there but its kinda bleh for me #but my managers were very nice about my giving my 2 weeks so. and perfect timing because tomorrow im training someone #new to start the same job as me to help out. woulve been doing it anyway and theyd be tehre to fill in when im out suck but instead i #think theyll just replace me so it works out. and i like teaching peope how to do my job :> #me rambling abt my life. nobody cares to read this lol. its not matter. these posts are boring but it feels nice to post stuff like it #makes me feel less isolated even of nobody sees it. different from thping it into a private notes app #idk. i need to talk to people more

[pankomako]

dude not me thinking about post-gang war arc gang's bay aughghgh the character design ideas i have are so GOOOODDD

#at this point i feel like i just SHOULD make gang's bay a tv show when i can #but also that depends if i can get the necessary people on it. mainly being boat (which i dont think will be too hard?) #(but that also depends if he would be interested in so much as being a voice actor) #(and that's like the bare minimum i'd need from him. i'd hope he also wants to do more of the development as well) #(which i mean it seems right up his alley? he seems to like creating characters n stories for an audience right) #but anyway it may actually be higher priority to me than bwob at this point. as much as i still love the idea of it #im just SO invested in gang's bay now #i think the main thing is that the ocs ive made for gang's bay i've developed to the point of them actually feeling real to me #and like people i could talk to. and there are SO many stories i could tell with them #meanwhile boardwalk is meant to be smth a little more like a recent disney cartoon: a sort of blend between episodic and serialized #where it kind of starts as more of a sitcom but builds up to a big dramatic save-the-world type plot leaving everything changed for better #at this point gang's bay also kinda does that but on a smaller scale conflict-wise but is far more flexible #in that a LOT could happen before and after the fact. it's still at its core a sitcom #but it's still allowed to have a sort of story progression between the gang war and the characters changing & finding their life partners #gang's bay also has SO many more themes than bwob does at this point #bwob is supposed to be an allegory for acceptance of queer individuals or even any type of diversity #meanwhile in gangs bay there's friendship and trust and the meaning of masculinity and growing up and overcoming addiction and trauma and- #there's just SO much at this point dude. if any show SHOULD run for like 10 seasons or more it's gang's bay #honestly im not even sure where it would end at this point. either way if it were a show it'd probably be the best adult cartoon out there #UGHHHH im so hyperfixated on this cant you tell

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

Sometimes u have to go to an arcade in the middle of the workday to not go insane

#it was like. an extended lunch break we’re so fine #altho there was a manager who came by to talk to us and I showed him our aliens #and my friend got SO visibly nervous and I was offended #I have SOME common sense I’m not about to tell him we just got them from Dave and busters #I think I got. maybe three? hours of work done yesterday #but honestly im already over time. by a LOT AND I’m working this weekend so I don’t care. #I wish I was more like Victoria actualyl in that aspect #cause I feel so guilty if I ever work less than 40 hours #and this girl works. maybe 20 hours a week IF that and regularly brags about it #and I support her. #anyways we shot LOTS of zombies and cyborgs #and we went to main event after work and shot some more #and also I’m SO good at air hockey I fucking crushed her #and we played mini golf for the first time and she made fun of me for it #as I was typing this she texted me more mini golf locations. as if I’m ever going to subject myself to that ridicule again #she said she’s never been defeated in foosball. so one of these days we’re gonna find a foosball table and yea she’s probably gonna beat me #but it’s ON. we’re both very very very competitive. and she’s much better at hiding it but I know she’s seething inside when I beat her #altho I did keep holding the gun backwards for the shooting games. so I wasn’t that much of a challenge. but once I figured it out #I held it the right way!! I bet I’d be awesome at those against literally anyone else #someone who hasn’t been shooting guns for like over a decade. and I pointed that out I was like HOW ARE U MAKING FUN OF ME FOR NOT KNOWING #HOW TO KILL PEOPLE. and she was like yeah that’s fair probably not an experience u should ever have #also I might be getting therapy. very humiliating to start crying at mini golf cause someone keeps suggesting their therapist for u. #but also I’m Mad that she’s pathologizing my jokes about eating random shit. like it’s very very funny and I rarely do it anymore!! #like there are SO MANY other things that I actually need therapy for than my eating habits. also she kept being annoying about food #so I told her she wasn’t my mom and she was like ‘I am now’ in FRONT of Luke and he just went ‘ok I’m not touching that’ and walked away #which is the first good call he’s ever made in his life #I don’t get why she’s friends with me. like yeah I’m useful but she hangs out with me a LOT and is like. fine with it?? I’m not too much?? #it’s Weird. I should just ask her why we’re friends but I know she’d give me this Look and I don’t want to see that look of judgement #I was gonna meet her older friend today whose in her 50s and get lunch with her but it didn’t work out. but apparently she’s a lot like me #my current theory is that I just remind her of herself when she was younger so she’s trying to get me to not make the same mistakes maybe

[twentyninth]

☆ ❝ 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞? ❞ ⋆ hsr x reader

synopsis. whenever he wants to taste you so bad ...

warnings. cervix eating, afab!gn!reader, face sitting, dom!character, they/them pronouns are used on reader, squirting (done by reader), overstimulation, fingering

author's note. just finished a documentary on a serial killer then wrote an essay with my own free will

pairings. dan heng, blade, luocha, jing yuan, sampo, welt, caelus x afab!gn!reader / fem!reader (take this however you like because i still use they/them on reader but they're afab :p)

dan heng is just messy asf, like probably his first time too, never really has had gotten the chance to ever eat anyone out. kind of was too busy to do that. but when you offered, he couldn't help but think of how you'd be straddled atop his chest, and his tongue just went deeper and deeper into your sensitive hole, and honestly would slurp your aftermath all up after with no shame. the loud sounds of him licking up all your cum didn't help the embarassment. but he pushed his thoughts away and finally got you straddled onto his face, and pleasure was all that was on his mind. the taste of your sweet honey just made him wanna indulge so much deeper inside you. your velvety walls clenching around his snake-like tongue was a good enough sign he'd get to taste such sweet bliss again.

type of guy to overstimulate the hell outta you just for all that essence. he has never tasted anything better. probably would finger you while you sit on the motel bed you rented for a few measly 10 thousand credits. becomes so greedy when his mouth is finally latched onto your hole just begging for you to come. after a while of eating you out, he'll just know where your g-spot is, would go so far to even say his tongue memorized it, and the taste. and he just can't get enough of it. and after everyday as your trailblazing mission is ongoing, whether you'd be away from him at the moment or just right beside him, he already misses you and your pussy so much :(

caelus is def a big sweetheart about it. even though you think he wouldn't be the one to ask, he would. "hey i've been a little stressed lately, can you.. sit on my face and let me treat you right?", and can't help but be a little messy with it, when you finally are on top of him. your hole is right there, wet and ready for him. he's still so blushy, shy and nervous about it. but as soon as he gets a taste of such bliss, he can't help but get more, and more, and more. as soon as he felt your cum on his tongue he couldn't help but want more! he doesn't mean to overstimulate you :(( he just wants more of that tasty sweetness!

does it after trailblazing missions specifically, his thoughts do lowkey get to him while on the job, probably jerked off to the idea of eating you out, or you giving him a blowjob, but that's another story, for another day, not tomorrow, not the day after, some day. anyways, he definitely likes the idea of doing it publicly, the adrenaline of someone catching you in the bathroom with your boyfriend's mouth filled with lust and hunger, he'd keep going if that ever happened, literally just wants everything we can harvest out of you. at first he does like to tease with a bit of fingering and kitty licks while you're blindfolded. your thighs slowly choking him is such a relieving feeling to him, he can't wait to feel that exotic bliss on his tongue.

cw: public-ish sex

sampo will not hesitate to tease the living hell out of you, does it everyday, and any day. and is not shameful at all, will ask you to sit on his face with confidence. after all the teasing is over though he will be messy with it. lowkey wants you to fuck his face with your pussy slowly because it feels that good. his nose literally covered in your wetness because of how deep his tongue is in, or how your forcing his face to get closer, as you're ab to cum!! also the kind of guy to finger you while he eats you out.

loves doing it in an alleyway in belobog especially. just indulging the hell outta your pussy while others just watch as he marks what's clearly his. his gloved finger so deep inside you, so deep inside your pussy and he just had to have such long and slender fingers, as he kept licking your blushing clit, and he couldn't help but moan into your pussy too <33 the vibrations just sent all the more pleasure into you. after that, he'll forcibly grab your thighs and put them atop his shoulders as he also sat you down on 2 small boxes stack on each other and eats you out even more. not afraid at all to overstim your poor hole. but how can he resist such ethereal tasting bliss of yours? it tasted so good he just couldn't get enough!

welt is very straightforward. only word that comes to mind, no shame, maybe a bit, but will ask you himself with pleasure to ask you to sit ontop of his face, or at least just let him eat you out. he's been so stressed after that trailblazing mission.. he's just gotta eat somethingg.... and you can't deny him forever so one thing led to another, he's ravaging in the taste of your hole, god.. why was it just so fucking addicting? the sticky taste of the sweet little honey you produced made him wanna cum, he is indeed stroking his cock as he eats you out, he's just that kind of guy!!

more into doing it in private, prefers that only he hears how good his tongue makes you feel. so long, and it just felt so good, his nose getting covered in the sticky essence, he didn't care anymore, he just wanted more and more. but would probably ask you if he can overstimulate you more LOL. if himeko like ever just comes in without knocking, he'll literally growl, and she'll be out in a jiffy, just.. can't get the image of a hungry welt eating his s/o's pussy like a homeless man who hasn't ate in days... is just certainly shocked, calm, collected, and cool; welt yang, was so easily undone and broken by his s/o('s taste yum yum yum)..

jing yuan has no mercy at all, and will ask you so nonchalantly, "hey, can you sit on my face i'm kinda stressed ;(" is the first text you see when opening your phone. is this really the dozing general of luofu.. asks you so many times actually, like when he's bored and lazing around he'll just ask you to sit on his desk while he eats you out. but dear fucking god— whenever you just came all over his tongue, why the hell did that taste so damn good?? so good he would literally eat you out everyday if he could just to have that 'snack'. and he wouldn't want anyone else's, yours was special, that's what he said. and honestly i see him to be the type that his eyes glow when he gets closer to his climax, and he is another one of the cock stroking while eating you out gang!!

whatever anyway, he'll pound the hell out of your pussy after anyway, don't worry! it's just 'till you can't move a damn muscle in your legs, kind of guy to just want to hold you down by your hips, or the plush of your thighs, he just wants you to hold still while he drinks the devil's wine. if he isn't stroking his cock while he eats you out, his hard cock will just be out in the open while he fingers and eats you out too <3. eats you out like a snack literally sometimes, because he acts like he didn't just eat you out half the time. like after getting you cleaned up and everything, he literally would just start asking "you want anything for dinner?", "huh? it's 1pm in the afternoon jing yuan—"

blade is really rough when eating you out. messy and rough. type of guy to softly bite on your clit/really rub his tongue against that spot tbh HLP.. overall is confident, "hey babe can i eat you out rq im aboutta go out" "huh??". has your legs on his shoulders and roughly brings your hole to his mouth, all that juice on his tongue is really what makes him distracted from anything else, like even if anyone were to walk in on you both, he wouldn't care, your sultry moans and you cumming all over his face is all that mattered. will finger you and eat you out because he likes it when you squirt your cum out, is in love with the idea. and right after probably would put you into a mating press and insert his dick so smoothly inside there <3

the type to say i'll wash you up after eating you out but ends up having sex in the shower and literally pounds the shit out of your hole.. again.. in the bed this time.. he gives the first impression of high sex drive, breeding kink blade, what can i say? anyways, will just be so glad to slurp all your cum up after, in love with the scent, smell, taste, anything about you, and he'd gladly say it out loud. just keep cumming all over his face when he eats you out and little bladies will be running everywhere :0

luocha, even if he is a doctor of some sort, he is either so vanilla with it, just a few kitty licks and fingering you, or rough as fuck and messy, no in between because it's either he's gonna make you cum all over his face or cream on his face, doesn't want anything in between. will be glad to finger you if he feels like he wants your cum to just squirt everywhere, mmm just sit on his face and let him do the rest. doesn't care if his hair gets messy, doesn't care if he's supposed to be somewhere right now, he just wants more of this.. essence. whatever it is, he wants more. and won't be pleased if he hasn't milked you of all of it.

doesn't care if anyone decides to walk in on you both either, but that doesn't mean he prefers public sex. just prefers these moments to just him and you. probably also has a breeding kink. while he fingers you, right before he indulges himself in you, and gets too lost and drunk on the taste, he's already daydreaming of mini versions of him and you. loves the idea sm<33 and is glad you are pleased by the idea too!! so he hopes you don't mind his rock hard cock will pound you after a few 7 rounds of eating you out! just for you <3

can't take the word pussy seriously had to replace it with hole for that and because i want this to be for everyone/every reader!!

#⤷ ﹒ ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა beep beep: a finished show! ♡ #hsr x y/n #hsr x you #hsr smut #hsr x reader #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail smut #hsr x gender neutral reader #hsr x reader smut #blade smut #hsr blade x reader #blade x reader #dan heng smut #hsr dan heng x reader #dan heng x reader #jing yuan smut #jing yuan x reader #hsr jing yuan x reader #sampo smut #caelus smut #welt smut

[loser-brain]

Very long Vent

I hate the fact I cannot focus on what is important to me such as transportation. I cannot drive due to my mental health. I will have a panic attack and become overwhelmed thanks to my mother putting trauma in me when I was driving.

I already made a vent post about that went in-depth about it too. So, changing the course of the story here is another reasoning on why I won't fix an old bike in my garage.

I'm 4'11 and I'm very short. We have a child bike (a childhood bike) and an adult bike (way too tall for me to ride). I want to fix that child's bike (literally need a change of wheels) but the reason why I can't is because my dad won't let me really not really work on the bike.

It's confusing I know. I'm also confused as well. I even express that I want to fix a bike in our garage because 1, I can ride it and 2, so that way I can also have the ability to ACTUALLY LEAVE THE HOUSE FOR ONCE.

Everyone in the house always complains about me not leaving the house... Well yeah, I have no way of transportation. And even when I do make plans such as I want to buy something for either my dogs or a project for myself. I'm always told that everyone is free and can drive me. Like I am told, constantly that no one has a schedule or plan. They are free and can drive me where I want...

I ask hey I want to go to blank and blank. They always respond. I'm busy, we have plans, I don't want to drive you, maybe another time, not today, and so on.

So back to the bike. That is my reasoning, I get told whatever. It's frustrating. I want to fix the bike I said Just buy a new bike they said How much does a new bike cost I asked A lot of money that you don't have they answer Okay so back to my idea let me fix the old bike I responded you should just buy a new bike they sternly spoke but you said it's expensive I retorted You wanted to buy an electric bike right? They asked Yeah, why? I answered with a question Then get a driver's license so you can have that bike they spoke no, I can't drive I'll have a panic attack and freeze up and become a hazard or a dangerous driver I spoke back in anger

and here's the kicker that really pisses me off

whatever. They spoke. Ending the conversation.

If I were to somehow get my driver's license, they will buy me an electric bike. That's the deal since their argument is that an electric bike is similar to a motorcycle.

I just... want a way for me to ride my bike to my dog's vet with ease and even be able to go to my downtown and possibly sell in-person art. BUT NO I CAN'T BECAUSE MY MOTHER SAYS THAT'S DANGEROUS! MY FATHER SAID JUST GET A DRIVER'S LICENSE.

it's frustrating when I come up with a solution to my long-term problem and only be told no. or stop. or do something else. it's frustrating that I can't drive and it's frustrating that I can't work on the bike.

Not because I'm getting mixed signals but more because I can't reach the bike... it's hanging from the ceiling and my dad won't get it for me because he doesn't want me to work on the bike.

Like, I would become so much healthier riding a bike around, and possibly it might even boost my confidence instead of being called lazy for not doing anything even though I do clean the house and take care of my dogs.

My mother is so toxic. For some reason, if she comes home and sees my sis and I on the couch, she just assumes we're lazy. Even though she comes home at 4pm and we (mostly I) wake up at 9am. You know what I can get done in that amount of time before she comes home.

Chores such as vacuuming, cleaning the windows and the bathroom, taking the dogs outside, clean their crate and their mess outside of the crate. Heck, if I am very bored I will sweep the patio. I'll mop the floors too if the dogs actually behave and not track their wet paws in the house (I'll have to dry their paws or just wait for their paws to dry on their own. I prefer to wait since they are messy drinkers as well).

My mother is sadly old-fashioned, in other words, she doesn't know that abuse can come in different forms. When you say abuse she will assume physical. Mental abuse, Verbal abuse, physiological abuse, and other types... Yeah, that doesn't exist to her. When I say old-fashioned, I mean she just doesn’t know, even when you try to explain to her about abuse coming in different forms... She'll call me insane or not right in the head.

Saying because of the internet I have become delusional... and stupid. She doesn't understand mental health either. So when you tell her about depression. She just thinks you're sad and eating ice cream. Crying and stressing out of your mind thinking it's the end of the world for you like a breakup... She even told me when she wanted me to work and I respond I'll need to be on antidepressants then because I cannot work in an environment like that.

Her response to me saying that... I also have depression too. I also get sad but you don't see me needing antidepressants.

...

My mother hasn't even been diagnosed by a behavioral psychologist. MEANWHILE, I HAVE. THIS IS THE SAME WOMAN THAT DOESN'T BELIEVE IN MENTAL HEALTH AND NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN SHE TOO HAS MENTAL HEALTH!?

MOM! ANTIDEPRESSANTS AREN'T JUST FOR DEPRESSION! I HAVE MAJOR ANXIETY I CANNOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME HANDLE PEOPLE INTERACTION.

I have a phobia of being in large areas fill/crowded with people. I just can't handle that at all. At my last job, I got overwhelmed to the point that I stop paying attention to my job. Which was bad!

It just got way too much and way too loud for me that I ended up looking around and not at my machine. That's really reckless because these are our client orders that I am possibly ruining by not paying attention.

So ye, I love my mother btw, but it's just... so exhausting having to deal with her and my dad (mostly her). I love my parents and they just want what is best for me like getting my driver's license. That would make my life so much easier and not just transportation-wise but just for everything-wise. But sadly, they stop taking me seriously now when it comes to my mental health.

It's sad to hear I know blah blah blah. I'm gonna work on the bike tomorrow whether they like it or not... If I can reach it, if not, then I'll cry :'|

#loserbrain eat a snickers #sorry im rambling #It also been a lot for me too since my dog it just going back and forth from feeling better and not. #she's okay I just need to monitor her more and more now. She been having accidents on the floors lately :( #Which in her case is good. If she can still pee then she is still healthy. #however pooping has been her enemy as of late :( #I just want to take her to the beach like old times. My Aunt and I would walk to the beach together every morning. #It would just be the three of us walking from our home to the beach. walking to the end of the pier and just take in the lake breeze #I just want to take her to the beach before it times for her to go #I already lost my aunt a few days after Easter. I'm still not okay. I still miss her and try to remember her voice. #She always calls me Ah Dee short for DeeDee from Dexter Laboratory #I love my Aunt and still grieve her. I'm not ready to lose another loved one honestly. #Sorry for making this sad I just need to type this out really badly. I have just been oof and tired lately. #Anyway. Sorry!!!

[kiirschtein-archive]

⋆ 「 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐦𝐢’𝐬 (𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞) 𝐦𝐨𝐦. 」 ⋆

feat. — toji fushiguro x f!reader, kid!megumi

word count. — 1.4k

content. — sfw, non-sorcerer au, established relationship (marriage), mostly just fluffy domestic stuff, reader is addressed as ‘mom/mama/mommy,’ toji’s kind of a bad parent but he’s working on it, brief mention of toji smoking (cigarettes), overprotective!toji, very minor suggestive themes (from toji 🙄 he’s a walking cw/tw)

notes. — idk. this has been incessantly on my brain pretty much from the moment i  woke up today, even to the point where i was writing half of this at  the laundromat lmao. mother’s day yesterday had me feeling some type of way, so here have some fun headcanons from a strange eldest daughter!!!! (i might end up doing a set of these for gojo x reader too 🤔)

⋆ 「 — he’s not your biological son, but you’ve been around since you started seeing toji when megumi was still a baby. but now, a few years later, you might as well be his real mother. you certainly act like it and feel like it, so toji gladly initiates the conversation about official adoption. it just makes sense. you eventually explain the situation to megumi as best as you can simply so that he doesn't grow up thinking he was lied to or anything of the sort, but as far as he's concerned, you're his mom whether it's by blood or not.

⋆ 「 — and oh, megumi’s a mama’s boy. i imagine he’s just a little bit of a healthier kid vs. canon given the better family situation, but he’s still always a bit of a grumpy baby, appreciating his autonomy and trying to be as self-sufficient and mature as he can be. but he’ll most certainly run to you when he needs help, is truly hurt, or just needing a bit of comfort. you’ve always treated him so softly and kindly with understanding, so he honestly feels more comfortable coming to you most of the time instead of his dad.

⋆ 「 — he likes the way you organize the bookshelf in his room or fold and sort his clothes in special little ways. he gets upset any time toji tries to put a book back in the wrong place or can’t figure out where his damn socks are. gumi will scowl and say, “that’s not where it goes.” or go deadpan and be like, “mom always keeps the socks in the bottom drawer.” disappointed that his father can’t even remember. toji just grumbles and says, “your mama’s gonna ruin you.”

⋆ 「 — has called you 'mom' basically since he was old enough, but don't let him fool you. megumi will drop the big boy act and come out with 'mama' or 'mommy' when something's wrong or he's really excited. he'll come to you with quiet tears and sniffles, a little ashamed that he's crying, but present to you a scraped elbow, "mama... it hurts." you clean up the scrape and explain to him the little medical details in a somewhat understandable way to help him focus on something besides the pain, and you tell him that it'll be okay, and that it's alright to cry. or on the flip-side, you and toji take him to the zoo, little gumi on his dad's shoulders, and he gasps and points excitedly, "look, mommy! look at the big elephant!" and it feels incredible to see him be so spirited.

⋆ 「 — along the lines of the art from this post and the thought i had about it earlier, just imagine that you're at some event (maybe like a birthday party or something), and toji's been hauling megumi around. they're both so over it at this point and are like 'please get me out of this' so as soon as toji walks past the obnoxious inflatable bouncy house, he smirks and just YEETS that kid inside without a second thought. after regaining his breath, megumi just looks at his father with the most EVIL little scowl as other kids bounce around him with smiles. by the look on that child's face you could've swore that his father had just done him the ultimate betrayal.

so gumi slides out and hurriedly makes his way over to where you're sitting off to the side, quietly climbing into your lap for a little bit of solace. he wiggles in close to your chest and you tuck him under your chin with a ‘come here, sweetpea,’ rocking slowly and humming something soft because he always seems to like it when you do.

toji comes over and you look at him through narrowed eyes. "kids are supposed to like shit like that," he says.

"you know he likes when things are more quiet," you respond, and toji rolls his eyes at how you seemingly spoil your son.

"just thought it might be good for him to try and get along with the other brats." toji tries to cover up the fact that he tossed his kid for the sheer personal enjoyment of it.

you huff in disbelief. "oh, like you get along so well with everyone?"

he scoffs and moves in behind you, leaning down to place a kiss on your neck. "i get along with you," he says almost suggestively.

you just keep stroking megumi's hair and give the top of his head a gentle kiss. "yeah, well not today," you say, shooting a smug, resolute smile towards your husband, ultimately taking his son's side.

⋆ 「 — outside of his alone time, megumi would honestly much rather be with you instead of other children. toji thinks it's probably unhealthy and you're inclined to agree, but you also don't want to force megumi into situations that will just make him miserable. so, when appropriate, you don't mind at all pacing around with him in your arms or have him walk next to you (maybe holding your hand if he’s not in a ‘big boy’ mood), teaching him about the things you see in the woods, the park, or even the museum. when toji's not away working, he'll join too because it admittedly makes his heart feel soft to watch you two together. it always has, because you've been doing this with megumi since he was a baby. it never gets old. if it wasn't already so difficult trying to figure out how to do things right by his son, he'd want you to give him even more babies.

⋆ 「 — megumi likes doing things with his dad sometimes too, though. toji tries his best to do it right and watch both his mouth and his temper. you like seeing them getting along, even if it's just quietly watching tv or a movie (probably a cartoon where toji gets kind of into and will ask the occasional question like "why does that one stupid chick keep doing that?" and megumi just shrugs like, "i dunno. she is pretty dumb.") or playing ball outside because gumi's starting to show some athleticism. but you have to remind toji that he can't always be so rough or competitive with games because megumi is literally a child.

⋆ 「 — toji can also be way too overprotective of you two at times. you'll be out and about and he'll just be wearing such an intimidating expression as he walks behind you both, on the lookout for anyone who might want to cause trouble or take the wrong sort of glance at his wife. he'll even snap at people for walking too close or like cutting in line or something petty, and you have to tell him stop acting like an attack dog and looking like the grim reaper because dear god you're literally just having lunch at the park. even at his age, megumi's just eating his ice cream and looking at his dad with his little baby deadpan expression and thinking "this man really needs to take a chill pill." other times he can be more relaxed, however, obviously confident in his ability to protect you. it depends on his mood. but that still doesn’t stop him from being embarrassing and going off on people in public if something happens.

⋆ 「 — you also know all of gumi’s favorite meals and snacks. it’s yet another one of those things where, if his dad does it wrong, megumi expresses a disappointment beyond his years. toji will be making and packing his son’s school lunch just as instructed by the notes you gave him, but it’s by no means as neat and meticulous as when you do it. toji’s got a cigarette hanging out of his mouth with furrowed, concentrating brows, his free hand shakily reaching for a cup of fresh coffee, and megumi’s standing there with his little backpack, criticizing his father the entire time. “mom doesn’t do it like that,” he says.

“well mom ain’t here right now. and it doesn’t matter how the sandwich is cut, is still tastes the damn same.”

gumi doesn’t even physically react, still wearing the same neutral expression, just waiting for his dad to hurry up. “mom says you shouldn’t smoke. and she also says not to use bad words.”

toji scoffs and then smirks. “well mommy uses all sorts of bad words you don’t even know about when her and daddy have play time.”

megumi’s already almost late for school and can barely feel his feet from how tight his dad tied his shoelaces. he also asks you later about “play time,” and you want to absolutely murder your husband over it.

#toji fushiguro x reader #toji x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #jjk x reader #c. — toji fushiguro #hc. — toji fushiguro #fluff. — toji fushiguro #c. — megumi fushiguro #hc. — megumi fushiguro #fluff. — megumi fushiguro #my writing.