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succubussteak · 1 year

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fucking hate it when people ask me what my goals are like they weren't "don't kill myself tomorrow" just a couple months ago

#txt #i had a really scary bout of vertigo when i woke up at 3am desperate to piss last night/this morning btw #i didnt. actually tell anybody about it.#i was like lying in bed desperately trying to recover wondering like damn #should i wake my mom up and tell her abt this.#but i didnt. and then i didnt all day #and now itd like #be really awkward and weird if i admitted it #like why wouldnt you say this earlier.#it was also..... very weird bc while my vision was swimming so bad i could barely see and i felt like i was abt to #collapse on the ground crack my head on the tiles etc I Was Still Trying To Wash My Hands #i didnt like give up on washing them until it was so bad i couldnt take it anymore #anyway ive had headaches for a long time but that was a fun and exciting new development.

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elftwink · 1 year

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one major difference i have found between service industry work (in my case food service but this is widely applicable to similar jobs) and other public-facing positions is that the job itself is often very similar because people is the same, it's just in service everyone approaches you already thinking they're right and you're a fucking idiot and its their god given right to disrespect you, where in other positions even if they are not nice to you they usually acknowledge that you know more than them on issues pertaining to your job. like the difference in behaviour from people who see you as serving them vs helping them is unreal. i am doing literally the exact same things. customer is always right mentality did irreparable damage to the fabric of society

#good idea generator #i loveee the library front desk everyone is polite and people will just ask you anything #they assume so much knowledge and access to data #ill be like 'just one moment let me look that up in the system' [googles name of school + upcoming events]#also not in a mean way but i never realized until i worked here how little anybody is googling anything #i think its funny and i also love to google things for people so i am perfectly suited to this #and some questions even though they are googleable the issue is more that the person isnt totally sure what theyre asking #but like. the library hours are visible on the home page. and outside the building that you just walked into on a sign #PPL DO NOT READ SIGNS. i knew that from other jobs but good lord people do NOT even GLANCE at signs #ppl would fully walk past like 4 signs about a specific thing and proceed to ask me a q about the thing. after waiting in a line #constantly CONSTANTLY ppl are trying to enter or exit through locked doors. clambering over closed signs to do so #its someones job when the library closes specifically to point out the signs and direct ppl to an open exit #and still often people will get up to the automatic doors and be baffled and confused as to why they dont open #but like even this i dealt w/this at my food service job and it was so frustrating #bc when you had to confront these people they would get MAD AT YOU. furious that they didnt read a sign telling them where to line up #but at the library people are polite and apologetic so you know it's not malice or entitlement ppl are just kind of inattentive #monumental difference tbh i actually love front counter so much people are so fun #and i like it when nobody is actively trying to kill me with their mind while we speak

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pyrriax · 8 months

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i just wrote lik e 700 words of a fic concept in less than ten minute lord help me it is incomprehensible but the imagery is so vivid in my head and i will never do it justice. my plans are a mess and its just rambling and i have this desire to share it so.

pov character is clown (i have no idea what server this would be set in. theres some implications that its ksmp but honestly it can go any way you want because my brain is a blackhole and i just absorb everything into one big disastrous blob) and im doing screenshots under a read more for MY sanity.

cw for gore, injury, death (i promise nobody important dies), all those good things. anyways enjoy a look into what my brain has been like for the past week and a half

first screenshot is the title i gave it, second is the prompt, third is the continuation of the second / the actual concept

AMBIGUOUS ENDIGN SORRY i probably wouldnt even keep that little dialogue chunk if i did write it. its just there so i know the pov because i literally did not use clown's name a single time through that entire disaster. like i implied it with the scythe and branzy's presence but. yeah. ALSO this is missing the fact that the sky is supposed to be blood red because. rapture. or something like that. i honestly have no idea and the only thought in my skull is the MyHouse.WAD video i just finished watching and this fucking song

#haunted ecosystem #haunted bookshelf #im not tagging this with anything officially #but i know how tumblr's search feature is. so. yeah #this concept actually made me feel nauseous when i thought about it so honestly take my frantic ramblings as my attempt to make sense of it #because like. this is going to eat away at my brain.#i need to finish planning that other fic. its calling to me. im waiting until i get to the vivisection prompt #ALSO this was written for a goretober prompt list (i cannot remember which one i am Sorry i just have one saved in my wiritng vault)#it's a wonder i spelled anything right in this because i wasnt looking at my screen i was just eyes locked on my keyboard so i #didnt lose focus on the concept by focusing on the words. so. its a mess. please tell me if anybody would actually read this.#Spotify

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sunshinequeer · 4 months

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I hate you tiktok, I hate you tiktok, I hate you tiktok

#'oh i have actual diagnosed ocd'#'?? you dont do -autistic trait-'?#'yeah thats a different thing'#and then the genuinely ACTUALLY fucking believe that im lying and theyre right AND THEYRE MAD AT ME ABOUT IT #'they like to lie about having ocd'#im going to obsessively and compulsively shove my foot so far up your ass #mo moans #i literally didnt tell ANYBODY for YEARS for THIS REASON #every intrusive thought joke #every time someone attributes other neurodivergency traits #every time someone says 'oh you have ocd like me because i like things tidy'#i actually can only interact with other people with ocd that have known for awhile now #and we will never discuss it #but by god will i never have to explain myself just to not be believed #or WORSE #to be believed for my Actual intrusive thoughts #ever again #rant

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intergalacticaquarium · 2 years

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Just outlined the next chapter and got some of it written and have I mentioned before that my core competency as a writer is writing angsty arguments that drive forward character devopment bc it is and I have

#and it is. good.#99% of the time i do it bc im actually arguing in spirit w fanon #bc it kinda annoys me when i see a fic w the cheerleader main and eddie is like babe u dont have to tell anybody bc i know u worked so hard #2 be popular ur too good for ke and then like ghosts her its infuriating #eddies childish but i dont think he would just completely ignore somebody or assume that they had a huge fight #based on something insignificant and i dont really think hed have the patience for somebody like that either. nor should anyone #also wow lost my original point about the cheerleader i do not buy that hed be cool w keeping ur legit official relationship a secret bc he #doesnt want to put your fucking popularity at risk #he might keep it a secret to stop u from being bullied but not bc youd stop being popular he would have 0 respect for that #also when hes like ur the only person that doesnt think im a freak #WRONG #do u not remember jonathans talk with will in season 2 where he says so what ur a freak im a freak id rather be friends with a freak than #a normie #eddie only says freak in a bad way when he says hunt the freak right bc now its bad and they turned on him for being a freak #not that hes a freak because everybody hates him #ppl dont stand on tables and say pretentious shit like that if they dont absolutely relish #in people insulting them by saying something true about them and then feeling cocky about it #old subcultures used to just be about lettin ur freak flag fly bc you didnt want to fit in i do not accept an eddie that is not #absolutely deliberately where he is on the social ladder he knows what hes doing hes enjoying every second of it #until everybody gets fed up and tries to fucking kill him for it #wow ok that was a rant #when ppl say that ppl write fanfiction bc something in canon is lacking theyre wrong its bc fanon interpretations are lacking #boy got woobified within 24 hours of s4 dropping i just need to be on the defense #and be out here screaming that hes a wild little freak boy that is probably very unsettling at times and needs to be transported #in a cat carrier #and hes doing it on purpose #all of this is said with all the love in my heart btw

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goethitee · 2 years

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hate hate hate when people aks your advice & then ignore it

#i should say beg actually. she begs for my advice on dog stuff #& then ignores me #‘why is he doing this’ ‘how do i deal with this’ ‘ hes sick what do i do’ ‘what should i do about this’#& then when i give her the answers in the gentlest way i can so she doesnt feel bad (even tho she should) she doesnt listen to me anyways #todays wasnt that bad but i rlly didnt want to answer cuz i didnt want to feel like… too involved ig idk #she asked me what to name her new puppy. obviously im not just gonna tell her what to name her fricken dog thats over stepping #but she cant leave well enough alone. so i said wjat we do (which has also been reinforced for me because freds dog trainers say the same #figure out what kind of vibe you want for your pet. the name helps shape who theyll be so u gatta figure out what u want first #i also said how there doesnt need to be a name rn she can think on it #but does she listen to me? no. ‘hm idk what vibe i want. i want a name now so i can call him’#why ask. why.#also the fact that she got this dog also rlly ticks me off lol.#because the other one is under a year yet & if anybody reads these… then u know she still hast gotten a vet. since october #now im gonna have to fake being happy even tho this is an awful idea #itd be one thing if she didnt beg for my opinion & then completely ignore it. while pretending like she’s actually listening to what im say #maybe you should have found a fucking vet for the first one & actually work w it before getting another one #& ofc it is a puppy. which are terrible. ik her bf is gonna be so fed up with the two dogs #i dont want to hear it anymore i dont want her to ask me things ive tried & im done #i hope everything works out the way they want but i rlly rlly doubt that

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pupuseriazag · 2 years

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Its 3:00 am and I've just woke up mad remembering how one of my professors almost failed one of my homeworks that he said we just needed to glue drawings of other people related to the word "Love" in a book we were doing and I decided to add fanart of some ships I had at that time and he said I failed the assignment because I had to glue drawings other people had GIVEN to me and not fanart and when I told him I didnt had any artists friends (at that time) he thought I was just making excuses and lying because "You really have NOT a single little drawing from your friends?!?!" Like if you want me to add the various dicks they would draw on the back of my notebook in school sure. Grade those 😑😑

#moona rambling #This was almost 4 years ago and Im still pissed about it #Actually aim still pissed about that whole assignment #How was I supposed to know I had to have artist friends before entering uni 🙃🙃🙃 all my irls ended up in way different careers than me #I AM the artist friend of them. And I didnt had anybody in uni yet #But legit he was sooo offended by me telling him I didnt had those #Im still kinda suspicious he didnt liked thst the ships where queer but anyways

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bastardlybonkers · 1 month

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i feel like not enough ppl are factoring in the cultural clash between laios and shuro and the many micro agressions shuro faced while being in their group. literally the name 'shuro' in itself is one

his name is toshiro 😭 lets also not forget that he has his own communication issues, in the opposite way that laios does- thats literally a factor in their argument, that his envy for laios's ability to express himself sincerely manifested as part of his distaste for him.

ig all this to say like, was their fight heart wrenching, especially when reading laios as autistic? absolutely. anybody whos ever been in laios's position knows how much it hurts to realize someone you thought was your friend doesnt actually like having you around, especially when they didnt tell you and you had no way of knowing due to not understanding their cues. but im begging yall to step back and see the nuance of this situation cause im gonna be real a lot of you are kinda just brushing over it acting like everything is toshiros fault and that hes a terrible person when in reality hes an average guy who really, really clashed with laios and it led to a very long misunderstanding due to their supremely opposite methods of communication. even laios and toshiro, after letting everything out in their fight, were able to come to an understanding and start a foundation for an actual friendship built on better communication

ok yknow what Edit: i shouldve made it even more explicit at the end of this post, i hadnt thought i would need to since i started the post with this, but i think a few too many people are missing my point so i just wanna clarify. i shouldnt have said 'really clashed' and left it at that because yeah they did, but it wasnt just their opposite methods of communication, it is also very much that toshiro was experiencing microaggressions via laios. it may have been unintentional on laios's part, but it still happened and wore him down, made it harder for him to communicate on top of both the more subtle social cues that he was raised with and his own communication difficulties. i also want to say that the fandom reaction to toshiro and the complete ignorance of this point is also racist tbh or at the very least ignorant. i understand that the anime did not cover this panel, and neither did the manga, as this was an omake, but im gonna be real with you guys. there are enough context clues within the story to clue you into this. if you didnt pick up on it thats ok, but i think this is a good lesson in picking up subtext in the stories that youre watching and/or reading. kui shouldnt have to explicitly say 'by the way laios was racist to toshiro' for this point to be understood, and at the very least, when the author portrays a character in a sympathetic light (as kui clearly does) it should make you question Why they are doing so and what makes them sympathetic, rather than youre immediate and only reaction to be 'well i hated what this guy did/said so i hate them and they suck'. idk exactly how to finish this, just. idk. question your biases and gut reactions to things you see in media and stories, and think about whether or not theres subtext that youre missing.

#dunmeshi #dungeon meshi #shuro dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #toshiro nakamoto #dont get me wrong i understand relating to a character and hating whoever wrongs them cause youre protective or you relate really hard #but i think toshiros been getting the short end of the stick for a long time now 😭#even his love for falin is misunderstood #he literally states all the reasons he likes her #and none of them are superficial #but hes so closed off and has such difficulty expressing himself that instead of asking her out or smth he just #proposed to her out of the blue 😭#leading a lot of ppl to just assume that he went 'white woman spotted' and proposed #do Not misunderstand me i am #a HUGE farcille stan #obviously #but i dont think toshiros feelings are surface level and i think theyre absolutely crucial to understanding him and his motivations #as a character in this story

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arrowpunk · 6 months

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Nobody gets to make my wife cry and then get away with it : )

#ramblings of an arrow #I am not gonna be a dick but it is gonna take all my self control to not be #I am gonna confront them abt it in the morning because what the Absolute Fuck #I genuinely cannot think of anything more immature and childishly stupid #when will the stupid shit Oranges did stop haunting us #has anybody considered just fucking talking to us and asking us for our point of view #instead of being shitty immature passive aggressive assholes behind our backs about it???#like babe you dont have the whole story maybe dont judge us for things that werent actually our fucking fault #I realize Oranges is really good at playing the saddest oh poor baby victim but that doesnt mean she actually IS #oh I am gonna punch a fucking wall #'oh youre too angry why are you still angry about this it happened forever ago and it wasnt that big of a deal'#shut the fuck up if you dont know what youre talking about actually I have every reason to be angry when it is still #fucking negatively affecting us #dont tell me what Im not allowed to feel when you didnt even stick around long enough to hear the whole story

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bloggirl8842 · 9 months

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Makes me so so sad that my first relationship was bad for me even though nothing explicitly bad happened. I see all these things about first loves or firsts in general and how fun it is but all I felt was obsessive, scared, confused, very rarely good. I only had fun when I was drunk (and he always made sure I was safe when I was drunk ofc) but the rest of it-- and even that-- was so tense and fraught, like trying to make unoiled gears turn

#i HATE that i now associate this w him because that was a friend and now i dont trust him in the slightest and i cant think of him too long #without developing all these unsubstantiated worries. i said i want to be friends again at some point but i really dont know if i can do it #i want to because i miss what was there before but like he as a person is now a trigger for me. its odd because we spoke once since the #breakup and it was good for me at least. it felt good. it felt relieving like having that friend back but if his absence inspires so much #worry (not worry for him but worry about him (who is he really? am i safe around him? is he safe around me? I don't feel safe)) then no.#i need so so so much time to even understand what happened and why it feels so bad and i need an ''after'' to play out to get a real #picture of who anybody involved actually is.#i dont trust him at all even though i want to. what sucks too is i have a great intuition around these things so i know intellectually ther #'s likely nothing that off about him but that he as he currently is is just very bad for me as i currently am. and vice versa. but that fee #like world ending panic if i think about it too much. god i cant wait for september to be over. if he brings up trying to be friends again #(which I hope he won't) I'll have to show him this or some other thing I've written during our time apart so he gets just how much time i #need bc in the moment ill be so relieved to be talking again that ill forget this feeling #we’re working on a show tgt about the devil and in those panic moments that triggers me a bit bc ive had sparse and easy to shut down but #still scary moments where i reflect on very very specific instances and think oh yeah the devil possessed him in that moment. and then im #like girl nooooo it fucking didnt what happened was actually [X] but the fact that my mind even goes there is INSANE #not unprecedented unfortunately. but insane. i was telling my mom some of these things and she was like ‘’that poor kid’’ and i was crying #like ‘’I KNOW he thought he got someone normal and he got ME’’#its so funny hes sad about the breakup in like a normal way meanwhile im like i dont care about the breakup but i think ive committed some #cardinal sins i think there is evil in the water and i may be exhibiting mild psychotic symptoms that ive been suppressing for many years.#i did really leave bc i was just not into it though #this is all like side effects. honestly issues ive been having for years and years but which were triggered and which id been suppressing #since like may/june #i just was not into it and i wanted to be but i wasnt and i got confused #this’ll be a fun memory that i sort of can’t talk about one day

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nyelaexe · 2 years

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Men are

#annoying #excuse me for not feeling like talking when i was sick like shit #i spent most of the last 2 weeks coughing my brains out with tissue up my nose or asleep from chugging zquil #so i could finally get some relief #i made plans with a friend a couple of weeks ago to go out but i got sick a few days before #and i tried to hold out to see if I'd get better bc i don't even know where id get sick from bc i don't leave the house #but after a few days it was clear i was sick bc my temp actually got up to 102 so i messaged him to reschedule #and he said yeah and that was that. i was sick for like a week straight then i had the sniffles and a runny nose #for another like 4 days. plus id been on my period for over a MONTH and i was suffering #then i finally texted him to let him know i was fine again days ago and he left me on read. and put a lot of passive aggressive shit on fb #like about how 'some people were made to give more love than theyll ever receive' and how 'people should stop with the lies and bs'#if i didnt want to go anywhere with you i would tell you that. hell i was actually excited to see him as evidenced by our messages #which is rare for me lol i dont like to see anybody exceot my friends like twice a year #i guess he was pissed bc i hadnt messaged him for 12 days after i told him i was sick so he assumed i was lying and didnt wanna see him #but i wasnt talking to anybody during that time. i texted my friends once about my pcos and that was it #i even texted my sister about how i was finally going out with guy but i got sick and i ws disappointed #i was barely even conscious for a lot of that time i blazed through a bottle of zquil and like 12 naproxen in that time to deal with cramps

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etheries1015 · 11 months

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Obey me x twisted wonderland crossover where MC goes to twisted wonderland from obey me but has their full range of magical powers

Only problem is, they can't really use it.

How would MC feel, hearing over and over about their useless state, when they are infact a rather powerful sorcerer?

pt 2 as requested: Here

Magic in twisted wonderland is managed and flows through mage stones, whilst in obey me magic is by a persons inner nature, and seems to be contained/managed via a wand of some sort (until you become mastered at it, like solomon, who still uses a wand!) Of course there are sigils and and other mediums to be used, however for this scenario, they are dulled thoroughly due to the 1) cut off between worlds and 2) The inability to adapt to a different worlds principles of magic.

Blot just isn't a thing in obey me, MC obviously doesn't have the ability to accumulate blot, so their type of magic is just incompatable with twisted wonderland. So imagine how goddamn frustrating it is when everyone likes to remind MC how magicless they are? And they really don't believe you when you tell them you're actually the apprentice of the most powerful sorcerer in humanity, and can control 7 of the most dangerous demons from your world.

"MC has about as much magical talent as a box of crayons," Ace snorts. He wouldn't be saying that if you just had the power to curse his mouth shut.

"You have no real merits to offer me, not to mention you cannot even use magic," Azul pointed out. If only you could summon leviathan and have him send lotan octavinelles way. They would be sobbing at your feet begging for forgiveness!

And Vil. "You're just about as polished as a sack of half priced potatos!" ...If Asmodeus were there to hear that comment. Vil would get a very analytical lecture about every tiny flaw and detail in his life. Vil would be shattered by the end of it, his pride and what he thought was beauty down the drain.

Crowley laughing at you to your face when you tried to tell him about devildom and where you wish to return. You? A magicless human? Hilarious. Crowley has been through his fair share of "demons" and dark magic, and he definitely did not believe you fit a "summoner of terrifying beings" vibe. If only Satan was there, then Crowley would really understand what it was like to fear something, and regret poking fun at you and taking your concerns so lightly. "If you had the ability to summon powerful demons , how come you are still here?" He mocked you. Of course you had tried, however with the problem being the connection between two completely separate dimensions causing a drift in your attempts to summon any of the brothers, It was nearly impossible. Sigils just did not carry the same amount of magic in twisted wonderland as it did back home.

It wasn't until you held one of the wishing stars (from the "make a wish" event) that anybody began to believe...no, consider your "ridiculous" stories. You held the star to your chest and made your wish of wanting to return home, to which it glowed so bright and cracked. Everyone stared at you as your star shattered, only someone with high concentrations of magic could cause something like this to happen. Since it wasn't powered via mage stone or the need of blot accumulation, your natural traces magic had managed to break the wishing star. Something only someone with a huge pool of magical ability could accomplish, if even.

"I have been trying to tell you guys" you growled, picking up the shattered pieces. Getting over the initial shock of the entire situation, they quickly dismissed it as a faulty star and writing off the strange phenomenon. There is just no way someone such as yourself could possibly hold such great traces of magic that you actually shattered the star, right? They all looked down at you, saw you so much differently, and treated you as such. You didnt belong at that school, and they made it clear. Well.... No matter.

Wait until they realize you finally had managed to successfully contact Lucifer, and they were actively working on your safe return.

And wait until they feel his power when he hears how poorly his little sheep had been treated.

~~~~~

Check out my masterlist for more of my works~

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thewertsearch · 21 days

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ERIDAN: for all that trainin you did ERIDAN: i wwouldnt be the incredible holy wwizard i am noww wwithout your help […] KANAYA: I Hope You Use Your Magnificent Powers Of Light And Hope For Goodness And Purity And Lets Not Forget Science

At this point. Kanaya is Human Sarcasming better than most actual humans.

ERIDAN: dont wworry im all ovver that shit you dont evven knoww KANAYA: Uh Oh I Hope That Didnt Come Off As Too Sarcastic […] KANAYA: Please Dont Take Too Much Offense ERIDAN: haha damn kan if thats your idea of offense bein made then i honestly gotta fuckin wworry for you ERIDAN: tell you wwhat ill givve you some lessons in dealin out the dark umbrage to repay you for your tutelage in the wwhite science

I think Dave taught Kanaya more about the art of trolling in a single conversation than Eridan could in an entire lifetime.

That guy can troll better than most actual trolls.

ERIDAN: wwhats that thing there KANAYA: The Matriorb KANAYA: I Was About To Go Hatch It In The Core To Restore Our Race ERIDAN: that sounds ERIDAN: hopeful […] ERIDAN: if theres goin to be any sort a hope for our race as the prince of hope i demand to be invvolvved ERIDAN: so dont go anywwhere wwithout me got it […] KANAYA: Fine

I’m all for the construction of neo-Alternia, but I really don't think Eridan should be on the planning committee, unless we also want a neo-hemospectrum.

Honestly, the only trolls I'd really trust to rebuild their society are the bottom half of the hemospectrum, and possibly Gamzee. The other highbloods can go sit in the corner.

ERIDAN: its not magic wwe talked about this kar KARKAT: RIGHT, IT'S POWERED BY SCIENCE, I FORGOT. KARKAT: OR HOPE. WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS

I don’t see how Hope translates to a robot-exploding beam, though.

If it was wizards he was blowing up, I’d understand, because it would be consistent with my theory that he's weaponizing his hatred of FRAUDULENT MAGIC. If anything, his Science Wand should strengthen a robot, since it's a product of the TRUEST SCIENCES.

ERIDAN: i had a harder time than anybody wwith this game ERIDAN: it wwas really fuckin unfair wwhat challenges i got saddled wwith ERIDAN: i wwoulda fuckin MURDERED for a land full of a lot a harmless brains and fire ERIDAN: but no ERIDAN: it wwas so lonely ERIDAN: hey guys anybody wwant to come hang out wwith me in the land a wwrath and angels

That sounds cool, though. Angels, I assume, are how Hope is represented in his Land, and I’m sure Eridan synergized well with its wrath. I wonder what physical form it took?

ERIDAN: anybody at all i knoww it isnt anythin like one of your flippin land picnics ERIDAN: anybody please ill evven settle for the kittycat shipper cavve girl

You can't complain about loneliness and then insult your ‘friend’ in the same breath. That's not how any of this works, and the fact that you're unaware of this should tell you everything you need to know about why you're lonely.

So Karkat does know about Nepeta’s little crush. He is a relationship aficionado, after all.

Poor Nepeta.

I sort of figured Karkat didn't reciprocate her feelings. He's preoccupied with plenty of other redrom prospects, and he basically never mentions her.

Karkat’s honestly a little too nice to Eridan. He’s being such a bro here, but what Eridan actually needs is to be brought down to size a little.

Granted, I think Eridan needs a bigger shock to the system than an angry tirade from Karkat. I feel like Terezi could tear him to pieces - but since it's unfair to expect her to put up with him alone, I'd put both the Scourge Sisters on this assignment. >:)

What Karkat is aptly demonstrating here is that there’s a difference between an Eridan kind of asshole and a Karkat kind of asshole.

Let's be real, here - Karkat's a dick. But he's a dick who holds no true malice, knows when he's crossed a line, and is willing to sincerely apologize for his past actions, and make amends.

Eridan possesses none of these qualities, which is why he sat alone in his house for a month while Karkat befriended the entire cast.

#homestuck liveblog #full liveblog #act 5.2 #3321 #s119

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narcissisticpdcultureis · 2 months

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npd culture is getting angry because most npd "positivity" posts from non-narcs is stuff like "narcissists arent ALL evil, horrible people, if youre a good person with npd i love you" or "narcissists are not inherently evil!!" and like yea true i guess but also why cant you say something nice??? say that we are passionate or that we didnt deserve the trauma we went through or that we're strong people or literally anything other than "im sowwy everyone thinks youre abusive assholes. at least i dont think that, that youre an abusive asshole. but most people do hate you. dont forget how stigmatised your disorder is through no fault of your own. have you tried being a model minority?"

like shut up!!!!! stop reminding me of how much people would actually hate me if i ever opened up about having npd!!!! this is why i cant tell anybody because even our allies cant stop bringing up how shit everyone else thinks we are and expect me to bow down at their feet for treating us like human beings???? fuck off

(sorry for the rant but this makes me so MAD)

.

#npd culture is #npd #actually narcissistic #actually npd #narcissistic personality disorder #cluster b

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adawngswife · 6 months

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dating sean diaz hcs pt 2

- before esteban fixed up a car for sean, u guys would always take the public bus around seattle

- his favorite dates r the ones where u guys go into random small stores and thrift shops

- both of u guys cackle REALLY LOUD at tacky shirts with stupid sayings and get looks from people 😭

- ur fav thing is to go “i found something ud like” and watch sean look up from the racks in excitement to see an overly patriotic shirt that says “don’t touch my truck”

- his face drops into a frown and he picks out something 10x uglier and say it looks like something ud wear

- sean secretly buys what u say is cute but u cant afford bc thrifting is so expensive for no reason these days

- “guess what i got” and he slithers it out of his bag with an evil smile 😭 suddenly him dissing u for an hour straight doesnt even matter anymore

- once esteban texts sean for dinner u guys hop on the bus back home. he never asks sean to come home for dinner alone though! common courtesy to invite the gf

- sharing wired earbuds on the bus ride home always. sean plays little love songs bc he only listens to music that he relates to in that specific moment 😭 corny but cute. he def has songs in his head that he thinks are ur guys’ songs and plays them every chance he gets

- when u first started eating with the diaz family it was so painfully awkward

- though he kind of likes it now, he did not want his girlfriend to get to know esteban or daniel too well LMAO he didnt want to be embarrassed by anything they possibly could say

- still, even when he tried so hard to avoid it, daniel and esteban still found their ways

- estebans the kind of dad to bring up embarrassing stories about sean when he was a kid bc he KNOWS how much his son would hate it

- “y’know (y/n), im surprised seanie boy over here even managed to get a girlfriend in the first place”

- “why is that, mr. diaz?”

- “i remember he thought girls couldn’t poop until he was in middle school! i had to break the news for him—he was in denial for weeks. his voice was shaking when i told him and everything!” u can see sean pause mid-chew in the corner of his eye 😭 “and please, call me esteban”

- you just awkwardly nodded and tried to not bust out laughing. sean notices and kicks u under the table which makes u ACTUALLY bust out laughing

- esteban and daniel knew from there u were one to be trusted

- “i bet (y/n) doesn’t poop” daniel randomly said when u left that night. seans immediately swiveled his head around 😭

- just like with lyla, daniel seemed to have a crush on u as well. the only difference is that sean tries to shut it down REALLY quick.

- “she shits all the time. sometimes i wipe her ass for her bc she shits so much”

- daniel’s “eww…” is like music to his ears

- u always playfully punch him when he does this in front of u and ask why he makes u look bad in front of him

- sean never admits its bc hes jealous of a little kid 😭 he just changes the subject and kisses u bc he thinks hes sneaky

- over the summer he randomly got a buzz and didnt say anything to anybody

- he just opened his front door standing there bald as if nothing happened and ur eyes wld just kind of widen

- u wld eventually tell him it looks good tho bc it DOES he pulls it off so well

- that summer u wld always randomly start feeling his head because the texture is so interesting

- it got to the point where hed just sit on the floor in front of wherever u were so ud get to feel his freshly mowed head

- he always ends up dozing off bc its so comforting and u wld feel his head pressed on ur inner leg.

- u also get the privilege of cutting/buzzing his hair 😋

- sean doesnt trust himself so u guys sit for 40 mins watching a brad mondo video before u start going ape on his hair

- he gets kind of nervous when u get close to his face and does that thing where u switch between a persons right eye and left eye while smiling awkwardly 😭

- surprisingly it turns out good!

- i feel like ud be super nit-picky on ur work, thinking its total ass. he wld just say its perfect over and over again

- he always stares at any reflective surface and smiles like a dork in front of it. even if u did do a shit job, he probably wouldnt notice or care all that much bc he loves blindly ❤️

im on winter break so i get to be cringe and free for endless hours thank u to like the 3 other people who also like sean diaz. u r all real ones

#life is strange 2 #sean diaz x reader #sean diaz #daniel diaz #sean diaz hcs

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babybinko · 6 months

Text

My second batch of venture bros genderbends are finally done! :D [first set here]

PLEASE LOOK UNDER THE CUT!!! I made all these nice drawings and doodles of them and I want people to see them without this post being super long! :') [My thoughts on the designs and doodles will be under the cut as well]

Okay NOW I'm going talk about my thought process on some of these:

Baby Rusty: I love the baby Rusty, the frilly socks and sleeves were a must. I actually drew her with the original set of genderbends but I turned off her layer and forgot about her 💀

Jonas Jr: not much to say about her, I tried to make her like Rosie the Riveter. Her little bandana has the Venture logo on it :)

Jonas Sr: I wanted her to be a hot bitch, her outfit is maybe a little scandalous for the time era they were in but I think it fits, canon Jonas is a whore. I think everybody would want her and that every celebrity, politician, and anybody with any power would chase after her so badly.

Blue Morpho: I made her so incredibly slay. I fucking love her outfit, I found the inspo for the outfit on Pinterest but I changed it up a bit. Also her gun has the bayonetta butterfly wings on it as a charm because I HAD TO.

Colonel Gentleman: Not a lot to say, I wanted to give her like horse riding esque boots and I gave her a purple flower cause she likes the ladies. I know generally WLW flowers are Violets and Lavender but I wanted to draw a rose so, Purple rose compromise <3

Dr.Boyfriend 2: With my last round Dr.Boyfriend was the only one people had complaints with. I think people wished he was more Masculine and I agree but if I switched up the design too much it wouldn't look like Dr.Girlfriend. I hope giving him armor and making him look like a knight helped him look more masc. I made the sheer wings cross over his chest to make it look like it was holding up the shoulder armor. Also his guild book is insanely high quality because I was procrastinating drawing his armor.

Goofy and Goober (Watch and Ward): I think they ended up really cute, I tried to make their hair colors close to Doc and Jacksons since I heard they are supposed to be like their "main" self inserts. With Ward I had a really specific idea for her hair, I kept thinking about this haircut from my sims and had to do it. It might be hard to see but her ponytail holders have skull charms on them. I also purposely gave them both some sort of ponytail hairstyle so they would match but be slightly different :) (They are absolutely prank calling or trolling their clients on that phone btw)

Shoreleave: OH MY GOD I LOVE SHORELEAVE. I kept turning her folder back on just to keep looking at her when I was drawing the other characters. She is so captivating to me, she looks so soft and human. I want to take a bite out of her thigh. My biggest inspo for her was Cammy from Street Fighter, I felt like her dressing a bit skimpy works for her since canon Shoreleave kinda does. The girls out for the girls.

Alchemist: I love her design so much too. I wanted her to look like some kind of nun or priestess. She looks like if a Zelda fire temple was a person. I kinda gave her like a weird little hime cut under the hood. Also I put the Triad logo on all three of their designs (+ Triana).

Jefferson: Had a lot of fun with her, I didnt change her design much from canon though so there's not much to say. I did give her more flared pants though. Drawing her hair was a really fun change of pace, I very rarely get to draw textured hair.

College Rusty and Monarch Drawing: I love this one, Monarch turned out so hot dude. You can tell what character I like more LMFAO. I made rusty very obnoxious 80s while keeping the colors of the original college rusty outfit. Monarch kind of looks like postal dude but its fine because shes slay.

Hereditary Venture Family Dinner Drawing: This was one of the first drawings I started but the second to last one I finished. I wanted to draw the family doing something together but I think I really truly just wanted to draw Dermott again. 😭 Nobody has said anything if they noticed but I did give hatred the shirt from these edits. (I believe the one on the left is from reddit and the one on the right is by SquashFold on Twitter)

Dermott piercing Dean's ears drawing: Even though its messy its in the top 3 favorites I did, It was also the last one I did. I just love the idea of Dermott giving goth Dean at home ear piercings. At first I didn't know if I wanted to make Dermott giving her piercings at the mall where she works or at home but the mall idea was too much work for a last minute sketch. Dermott is so mean older sister who shoplifts and works at the mall.

Drug bathroom drawing: Another one of my favorites, its based off a specific deleted scene from Invisible Hand of Fate where Pete and Rusty talk at the bar but Pete comes out of the bathroom sniffling at the start. I love the way I drew Pete pushing the hair out of her face and both of their expressions.

Bdsm 21 drawing: Okay first of all, The little devil Monarch was so cute I was screaming, crying, and throwing up while drawing her. I fucking love her, shes the smallest part of the image but my favorite. I also am quite fond of the bdsm 21.

Quizgirls Pete and Billy: I tried looking up Vanna White dresses to base Pete's outfit off of but I couldn't find one that Pete would actually wear so I just had to make shit up. Billy's design is really basic but the bow in her hair is actually from one of my rejected main Billy genderbends.

Me and The Bestie: I put a lot of effort into this one for no reason. Literally the moment I saw Jonas in the problem machine I thought he should be made of like blue slime. When I was working on this I kept thinking about Momopatchi's Hatsune Microbe drawing so this Jonas was definitely inspired by that. I gave Jonas makeup because she was having a party movie night on gargantua and I felt like she would still have makeup on thats like completely fucked up and deteriorating on her face after many many years. Vendata's outfit was partially based on Marguerite Chapman's from Flight to Mars, never seen it but I was looking up old sci-fi movie costumes to work with and I thought it would look good :)

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