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mossy-rock-in-a-field · 5 months

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Several weeks ago, my retirement-age mother requested that I play Baldur’s Gate 3 for her because she has trouble with controllers/keyboards and wanted “to see what all the fuss is about with that cute wizard boy.” For context, my mother and I have done this sort of thing in the past with certain RPGs (dragon age, mass effect, etc.), but it’s been a few years since she’s personally requested a game like this. Basically, I control her Tav but let her make all the choices so she can determine how the story plays out without worrying about mechanics. She treats it like a choose-your-own-adventure book.

Anyway, here is a list of some of the things my mother has said and/or chosen to do throughout the course of BG3 in no particular order:

She is (obviously) romancing Gale. She is quite smitten with him and his passion for books and learning; she also thinks he’s polite and qualifies as “relationship material.” She also REALLY likes the things he’s said about his cat so far (my mom is a cat lady), so I know she’s gonna flip shit when we meet Tara in Act III.

She’s playing a normal druid Tav with a generally good alignment. Her favorite spell is Spike Growth because she thinks it’s hilarious whenever enemies walk into the AOE and die. I usually end up having to cast it at least once per battle per her request. Sometimes twice.

Contrary to her alignment, my mother tasks me with robbing every single chest, crate, barrel, and burlap sack we come across; this also includes people and their pockets. The party is always at max carrying capacity. ALWAYS. She doesn’t like selling things because “what if I need them.” The camp stash is in literal shambles. There is no hope of organizing it. She’s got like fifty seven sets of rags and a billion pieces of random silverware.

She MUST talk to every animal and corpse in the game. I think five hours of her total playtime so far (47ish) has been spent speaking to animals as many times as humanly possible. Like, I was thorough in my own playthroughs, but this is on a whole other level.

She did NOT get Volo’s lobotomy, but she did let Auntie Ethel take her eye in hopes of a cure for the tadpole. I did not understand the logic then. I still do not understand it now.

She is far more interested in fashion than equipment stats. Do you have any idea how much gold I’ve had to spend on dyes just to make things match? SO much. Same vibe as that “please someone help me balance my finances my family is starving” tweet but instead of candles it’s thirty thousand fucking bottles of black and furnace red dye.

We broke the prisoners out of Moonrise, but they got on the boat too early and bugged the fight by leaving Astarion and Karlach behind. Wulbren Bongle somehow got stuck in combat mode even after engaging the cutscene on the docks below Last Light; he he kept trying to run ALL THE WAY BACK TO MOONRISE nine fucking meters at a time while I frantically tried to finish the fight with the Warden, otherwise Wulbren would have run straight into the shadow curse. (I would’ve let him go; fuck Wulbren Bongle, all my homies hate Wulbren Bongle. But my mom didn’t know that, and she wanted to keep him safe. So.)

She had me reload a save like eighteen times to save the giant eagles on top of Rosymorn Monastery. Wouldn’t even let me do non-lethal damage just to get past things. I think getting that warhammer for the dawnmaster puzzle took us like an hour and a half alone. (Yes, I know you can use any warhammer, but SHE didn’t.)

She’s started keeping an irl notebook to keep track of her quests between play sessions. She writes down ideas and strategies when she thinks of them during the week, then brings them to her next game session at my house. I think she wrote about three pages on possible approaches to the goblin fortress alone.

She insists that I pet Scratch and the owlbear cub before every single long rest, no exceptions. Sometimes I have to do it multiple times until she is absolutely sure that the animals know exactly how much she loves and cherishes them. She has also commissioned a crocheted owlbear plush from a friend of hers and is very excited.

I’m sure there’s a bunch of stuff I’m forgetting, but those are some fun things I thought of. She’s enjoying the game and is telling all of her retired friends to get it and play it for themselves. She asked me “what is Discord” yesterday and I think my life flashed before my eyes.

anyway shout out to my mom for being neat

Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale #gale of waterdeep #astarion #gale dekarios #laq talks #I talk #she stares at me real hard after she makes a choice too #like squinting to see if my expression gives anything away #if it was a good or bad call #I keep my face blank as shit it’s hilarious #I have not told her I’m writing fanfic for this game #nor will I ever #jesus christ

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orcelito · 11 months

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The intersection of no easy food, no clean dishes, and Bad Mood is such a horrid thing

#speculation nation #negative/#sure whatever #me sitting at home just trying to work up the will to eat Something #bc i need to. but im not really hungry and i dont have easy food and i have no dishes for the food i do have #i havent gotten groceries bc my past 2 days off were spent at the hospital and then at a house visit #for my terminally ill uncle.#and it's been a month since my cat died and it's 223 aqi outside and i am just #no clean dishes too much trash gnats building up no energy to do shit #i did laundry and cleaned the cat stuff yesterday bc i Had To so at least i have clean clothes #but the rest of my apartment is a mess & i have to fucking Pack for my trip at the end of the week #i dont even know how to make sure i have a carry on bc ive never bought plane tickets myself bc i havent flown since i was 18 #so im anxious about it and when im anxious about something i avoid it but i Cant keep avoiding it #and here i am tonight vague headache from the air pollution no energy to eat no energy to Shower #thinking of taking a shot to make it Shut Up for a bit & maybe then i can do things #im.... i wasnt planning on venting that much but. jesus fuckin christ y'all why's life gotta be this way #i just wanna have my fun happy hobbies and not worry about taking care of myself bc im shit at it anyways #i think i will take a shot. a compromise. i do one harmful thing to myself & then i do the good things for myself. idfk #and yes it's harmful bc i havent eaten and it's just straight vodka but ykno what i like it like that #i should probably shut up now. may or may not disappear for the rest of the night so i dont keep being a miserable fucking bastard online #ugh.#animal death ment/#disordered eating/#Close Enough. side effect of other things rather than a problem in and of itself but c'est la vie ya bitch

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tatoda · 10 months

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Seeing you | college!conrad x fem!reader

!!MINORS DNI!!

request

masterlist

summary: you come to surprise conrad at college on a rainy night

pairing: college!conrad x fem!teader

warnings: SMUT!! fem receiving, piv, conrad pleasing reader, soft sex, male receiving CHARACTERS ARE 18

wc: 2.1K

sorry if it's not really put together but I did try my best sorry if there are any mistakes

The drive to Brown was horrible tonight. It’s as if it was raining cats and dogs. But you told yourself nothing would stop you from seeing your boyfriend. You had a horrible week back at home. Your sister Belly was making you help her with trigonometry, and the only person you learned from was Conrad but he was busy this whole week with finals. Belly would take up all your free time when you weren’t doing your classes online. You decided to stay home your first 2 years and do online to help with Susannah and your mom as they both were going through a lot. But to your siblings, that just meant you’re always home for them to ask you for anything.

The rain calmed down as you entered the campus. He didn’t know you were coming but he did text you and tell you he has the weekend free to rest until his next final on monday. You wouldn’t be lying if you said that you cried the 3 hours of driving you did and all of connie’s texts were going unanswered so he became worried. He called Steven who told him you were sleeping— he was in on the surprise.

Pulling up to his dorm building you parked the car and grabbed your bag before running through the rain to the entrance. You tried to use the backpack as an umbrella but it didn’t work as your clothes got damp. Walking to the elevator it opened and you clicked the top floor. It felt like the machine was taking forever because he was just a few feet away. And it’s been almost 3 weeks since you saw him last. The sliding doors opened and you speed-walked to his door. Standing in front of it, you knocked breathing out of your mouth.

“coming!” the familiar voice yelled out and the door opened to his beautiful face

“hi.” you softly spoke scared he didn’t want you here but he didn’t say anything just ran and picked you up holding you close to him

“oh my gosh.” his head was in your neck breathing in your scent “you’re here.” he looked back at your teary face

“i missed you.” he wiped a fallen tear

“don’t cry.” he kissed your forehead running his hands through your damp hair “you drove in this rain?” worry struck his face

“i needed to see you.” both his hands cupped your face

“i was so worried when you didn’t answer and then steven said you were sleeping, i didn’t believe him.” he laughed and you shook your head at your young brother

“can i come in?” he moved and let you into the dorm room. his roommate was gone and conrad’s side of the room was neatly made just like he always did in cousins

“my roommate finished his finals so he’s gone.” the door closed behind you as you dropped your bag pealing off your jacket before flopping on his bed “dork.” he chuckled and climbed behind you bringing him towards you. “missed you,” he mumbled

“not possible i missed you more.” you turned around in his arms taking in his face. his thumb slowly drifted across your face

“i’m sorry that i was so busy, i know you were having a hard week.” you shook your head

“just had no time to relax. Belly needed help with trig and it got to a point i couldn’t understand, and then steven called me one night at like three am drunk asking for a ride when i had work at five. my mom was all over the place with your mom and it was a mess.” he didn’t interrupt you he just listened

“i’m sorry i couldn’t be there, you know jere can help too.”

“jere was drunk with steven.”

“of course he was.” conrad laughed “well i’m almost done with finals so i’m gonna be all yours.” he sighed bringing you closer to kiss you softly and you brought your hands up to his soft hair that you missed so much. the kiss depended as he moved to get on top of you putting his weight on you “missed you so much, gosh,” he whispered against your lips

“show me.” his eyes darkened as those words came out of your mouth.

“baby,” he mumbled looking down at you

“con, i’ve missed you so much, please. it’s been forever since you touched me.” a small smirk grew on his face before he leaned down to kiss your lips softly and then slowly descend down to your neck, but his lips stayed there as his hand drifted down towards the waistband of your sweatpants “please”

He didn’t have to be told twice by you. Conrad let his hand slip under your underwear and finally makes contact with you feeling the effect he has on you. His fingers started slowly circling your clit and it made you buck your hips into him feeling the hard pressure from him against you. He didn’t focus on that. Only you. He wanted to make sure you were satisfied. He could wait. As he teased you around your entrance his lips stopped kissing your neck and he looked into your eyes lovingly.

“hi,” you breathed into him as he ran a finger over you again

“hi baby.” he smiled down at you and slipped a finger inside of you catching your mouth in a gasp he kissed you “like that?” you nodded fast against him as he slowly moved in and out of you “so pretty.” he kissed the tip of your nose as he moved his thumb to play with your clit again circling it just how you liked it

“con.” you bucked into him again

“i’m not gonna let you cum, don’t you worry we’re gonna do that together.” he moved faster on the spot you needed him most before pulling out of you when he knew you were getting close

“yeah, yeah.” you sighed and conrad peeled off his shirt over his head and then helped you out of yours to see the lace bra you were wearing

“for me?” you leaned back on your elbows giving him a nice view

“the one and only.” he chuckled before you grabbed the side of his face and brought your lips back together. you slightly lifted yourself and unclipped your bra letting it fall between the both of your bodies. conrad sighed as he looked at your tits wondering how he got so lucky. he then moved both his hands to your waistband and separated from you

“you sure? i just thought you would be tired from the drive.” you couldn’t help but smile at him as he was the most caring and loving boy you have ever met

“for you, always.” he didn’t need another word before dragging both your underwear and pants down and tossed them off the bed to the floor

“careful connie gonna get your room dirty.”

“i’m only fine with that if you cause the mess.” he connected your lips once more as your hands drifted to his jeans. you could do this blindfolded anytime any day of the week. the button popped and you rolled the zipper down and pushed the fabric past his thighs, conrad groaned as it went past his hard erection

“fuck.” he fell to your shoulder

“seems like someone missed me,” you said kissing the side of his head

“give me a break, there’s so much phone sex with you can do.” you couldn’t respond as he bit down on your neck. next thing you knew his boxers were off and he was reaching into his side table for a condom. you designed the box where he kept them as it said ‘for y/n use only’ which you loved and conrad laughed as you gave it to him for his birthday. he ripped open the package and you relaxed on the bed as he slipped the condom on “soft tonight okay? missed you too much.” biting your lip you nodded as he breathed out lining up to you before pushing in little by little getting used to you again

“conrad.” you gasped digging your nails into his back

“i know baby, we have to get used to it again.” he moved a little more as a small whimper came out of you

“just go all the way. this is too much.” he listened to your words and pushed more into you

“fuck!” he bottomed out catching his breath and looked down at your closed-eyed figure “look at me.” he moved your hair from your face and your eyes opened to his pretty face “if it becomes too much, you let me know.”

“okay, i promise.” he relaxed onto you and moved his hips out before pushing them back into you causing both of you to groan

“j-just don’t moan too loud, i got neighbors.” he breathed out. last time you both had sex here conrad got a noise complaint and if he got a second one it would be his last warning for any visitors

“sorry.” you whispered against his lips and his hips slowed movements letting you feel him “don’t slow down.”

“just needed to feel you.” he dipped his head into the crook of your neck holding you close as if he wasn’t inside of you close enough already, you squeezed around him and his body jolted “if you do that again i will cum, and i really don’t want that.”

“then fuck me conrad.” he lifted his head as his eyes darkened over yours

“yes ma’am.” he pulled out all the way and slammed his hips back into yours the sound of skin slapping echoed around the room, he did that multiple times. it wasn’t hard it was telling and passion

As your breaths mixed you both slowly started to lose control. His hips got sloppy and that was a sigh he was getting closer to his edge. But something about conrad is he never wanted to finish first, he wanted you to have to spotlight before he finished after you.

“cant last much longer.” he grabbed one of your hands bringing it above your head and interlocking your fingers together as he looked down between the both of you and where you were connected

“me too.” you arched your back as he hit a spot like never before “fuck.” the man above you continued to hit that g-spot and you started to shake uncontrollably “con-“ he brought his lips down to your mouth and dragged one more thrust before you came, he slowed his movements letting you relax.

“i got you.” he pushed some of your hair away from your face

“did you finish?” the answer was no. he wanted you to feel special even before he could ever

“no it’s okay, i wanted it to be about you-“ you cut him off flipping both of you over carefully as the twin bed didn’t have much room. you slipped the condom off tying it and tossed it in his trash can

“y/n.” he sighed laying back on full display for you

“let me take care of you now.” leaning down his hard erection stayed up, red at the tip wanted to release

“do something baby.” you nodded before taking him all in your mouth

“god i love it when you do that.” using your hands you stroked what you couldn’t fit in your mouth and he bucked into your mouth hearing a gagging sound come from your throat “sorry.” but you ignored him coming up and sucking on the tip before going down again “cumming.” he groaned out and the warm texture filled your mouth some falling out past your lips “fuck, fuck” he held your head in place slowly pumping to get the rest out “good girl.” he sighed and fell back onto his pillow as you swallowed what you could then grabbing his shirt to clean the both of you

“good?” you wanted to make it everything he wanted

“amazing, come here.” he reached for you and you grabbed the blanket at the end of the bed before cuddling into his side covering the think texture over the two of you “i love you.” he looked down at your face

“i love you.” leaning up to kiss him softly he could taste himself on you and he knew there would be many more rounds tomorrow “thank you for visiting.”

“of course, i’d be lost without you conrad fisher.” and you closed your eyes driving off to sleep as he realized, he was gonna marry you one day.

#the summer i turned pretty #tsitp #conrad fisher #prime video #the summer i turned pretty season 2 #conrad fisher one shot #conrad fisher fluff #conrad fisher x y/n #tsitp team conrad #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher smut #tsitp conrad #conrad fisher x fem!reader #conrad fisher x you #conrad fisher imagine #team conrad

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moonstruckme · 3 months

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Steve x black cat! reader pls. I feel this paring is always necessary 😌

Thanks for requesting!

Steve Harrington x black cat!reader ♡ 625 words

You glower at your boyfriend through the dark lens of your sunglasses. “Don’t come near me with that.”

Steve smiles cajolingly, approaching with the sunscreen nonetheless. “C’mon, babe, you didn’t come out here just to sit under this umbrella all day.”

“You know I did.” You dart your stare pointedly to where the pale rocks are growing little puddles of lake water underneath his feet. “If you come over here and drip on my book—”

“Put the book away,” he coaxes. And he’s convincing, all shiny skin and even shinier smile and his pretty hair stuck damply to his forehead and the back of his neck. One tiny strand curls inward over the curve of his cheekbone, and you want terribly to slick it back in with the others but any affectionate gesture right now would feel too close to giving in. “Lemme put some sunscreen on you so you can come swim with the rest of us.”

“I’m fine here.”

“It’s really nice out there.” Steve sits down next to you like a mirror image, his hands by your feet and his feet next to your butt. “The lake’s not too cold or anything, you might like it.”

You suck your teeth. “I’m just trying to enjoy my book, Steve.”

He angles his head. “What, you don’t want to spend time with me?”

You angle your head right back, deadpan. “Don’t.”

“You know, Max really loves you,” he says, squirting a dollop of sunscreen into his hand and starting to smooth it up your calf. You wrinkle your nose at the smell. “She thinks you’re the coolest. Beats me why, but it’d probably make her week if you went out there.” You’re quiet, and he goes on, encouraged. He works the sunscreen over your knee, hands chaste and purposeful as they run the length of your thigh. “Plus, you know, you can read your book anytime, but these warm days are only gonna last so long before it’s freezing and snowy outside again.”

“I like when it’s freezing and snowy,” you say, setting your book down on top of your bag before one of you gets sunscreen on it.

“I know, but you won’t be getting the gun show when I’m all hidden under ten layers, y’know?”

Steve raises his eyebrows at you, and you look away from him, biting down on your smile. You feel more than see your boyfriend’s answering grin, spreading like a blight over his pretty face. He starts on your other leg.

“And if you come hang out, I’ve got an ice cream sandwich in the cooler with your name on it.” He brushes his thumb over the side of your knee sweetly. “Been saving it for you.”

You soften. A bit. “You could bring it to me here,” you point out.

Steve shakes his head, frowning as if he really doesn’t know who’s making these rules and wishes he could change them for you. “Can’t, sorry. Frozen treats are only for those of us out there braving the sun.”

You cross your arms. “You make it sound so pleasant.”

He takes one of your arms in his hands, disentangling your defensive stance to continue slathering you in sunscreen. “It’s really not bad,” he says. “Between the ice cream and the cool water, you can pretend it’s winter if you want.”

“Steve!” You both look out towards the lake, and Robin is waving him over. “Stop flirting with your girlfriend and come back here. We need more people to play chicken!”

Steve gives you a pleading look.

“I’m not getting wet,” you tell him firmly.

He grins and takes your hand, lotion-slicked palm sliding against your own as he pulls you up. “You won’t on my team, don’t worry.”

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seancekitsch · 1 month

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Hazbin Hotel—Lucifer x Reader where he’s a love struck fool for reader? May or may not be inspired by that little imagine you posted not too long ago \(//∇//)\

uhhh this kinda got away from me. enjoy!!

You’d have to be a fool not to notice how the King of Hell acts around you, even Angel and Husk told you that. But you’re not blinded to situation, you know exactly what’s going on. You rest your elbow on the bar next to Angel as Charlie gathers the hotel residents and staff, a job not unlike herding cats. Everyone trickles in slowly, waiting for the next odd trust bond activity Charlie has come up with now. Last week was heartfelt letter writing, and the three of you at the bar had not taken it seriously. You handed Husk a comedic inner monologue about how much you needed to pee, Husk handed Angel a surprisingly detailed made up story about a talking whisky bottle, and Angel handed you a list of what roles he’d cast the entire hotel in a porno.

“What do you think they’ll have us do this time?” Husk mumbles to you, topping off your drink.

“Honestly, not a fan of the way Princess is smiling right now,” you answer.

Charlie waves everyone over, and Vaggie smiles uncomfortably, ready for everyone to start.

“Okay Good Afternoon,” Charlie starts, practically bouncing, “Today we’re going to try to form new bonds!”

Immediately, she’s met with groaning and mumbling, but thats never stopped her and it won’t today either.

“So what better way to do that then having a buddy for the next twenty four hours!” She shouts, and Vaggie’s face immediately makes sense.

“I’ve separated everyone from their regular group so they can build these bonds and be open!”

“…got something you could open…” you hear Angel mumble under his breath.

Charlie gives her dad a thumbs up.

“The first pairing is… my dad and Y/n!”

The Morningstar family sucks at being subtle or lying.

“So what did you have planned for the day?” Lucifer asks while sitting beside you, his voice short and clipped, his entire demeanor like he’s on high alert. It’s cute, really.

“Ah don’t worry about it,” you shrug, “What does the areat King of Hell do with his day?”

Lucifer rubs his neck, fidgeting under your question.

“It’s not… Its not actually all that interesting,” he admits, “You’ve probably got something cooler going on.”

There’s something he’s avoiding besides your gaze, but you don’t press the issue.

You look across the lobby to Angel, who pauses his conversation with Vaggie to mouth something that looked like the word “fart” to you, and then wink.

Your art gallery. Right.

“Have you ever been to Pentagram City’s biggest art gallery?” you ask him.

Lucifer is a gentleman. You understand how he stole the first man’s first two wives from him. Sure, he’s stumbling and stuttering and a nervous wreck, but he’s holding doors open for you and asking about your thoughts and feelings about the pieces on display, he’s accidentally on purpose almost held your hand three times now. Next time he does it, you’re just going to grab his damn hand.

You stare at the sculpture in front of you, noting that you should have someone move this to a different room. In fact, there’s a few things you’ve noticed while showing Lucifer the art that you should have moved around. Maybe you’ve been neglecting the gallery a bit more than you thought now that you live at the hotel.

“Hey, Can I ask you about these?” Lucifer’s voice booms from the next room over. Sighing, you type a quick note into your V-Phone and turn.

Oh shit.

Lucifer found THAT room.

You cross the threshold into the room you never go into, the room with your own work. Honestly, it’s not even curated the way the other rooms and floors are. This is where you put anything that you think can leave your studio. He’s in front of one of your biggest paintings, and one of your newest. It’s an abstract piece about your feelings about redemption, about your past sins, about adjusting to the hotel. Which it sounds stupid when you put it like that, but it made sense in the moment and you’re proud of it.

He turns and smiles before looking back at the painting.

“Is the uh, is the artist willing to sell this piece?” he asks, his cheeks and the tips of his ears turning red.

Now it’s your turn to get nervous. You’ve never actually sold any of your own pieces before.

“I uh- I’m not gonna sell it to you,” you tell him, “You can have it.”

It would be weird to take money from Lucifer, even if he is offering. You like him a decent amount and a transaction between the two of you would make it weird. It would feel like you owe him, even though your art would technically satisfy that. If he was one of the Vees or someone you dislike, you would have immediately taken money.

“But the artist-“

“Me,” you clarify, and you finally remember you don’t tag your own art. Lucifer’s jaw drops at your admission.

“I’d really like to support your work, it’s magnificent,” Lucifer insists, and you feel your cheeks burning. He turns to gesture to another piece, and his knuckles brush your own.

Fuck it. You told yourself you’d do it. You grab Lucifer’s hand in your own, a bold move.

“Just think about it as a gift,” you tell him, “A thank you for the lovely day we’ve had.”

You inwardly cringe, knowing that when you recount today at the lobby bar your drinking buddies are going to tear you a new one for that corny line. But it fits for Lucifer; he’s bringing out a side of you that you really haven’t seen in a while.

“Thank you uh, gorgeous,” he tacks on the pet name like even he isn’t sure about it, and with his hand still in yours, attempts to lean against a sculpture, stumbling as he misses it and bringing you along with him. He tugs you by the arm, jerking you closer to him. He’s majorly out of practice.

“I have a studio upstairs if you want to see more?” you offer, not really sure if you thought that through.

“More art? Absolutely!” He recovers quickly, enthusiasm dripping from his voice.

You smile as you pull him towards the hallway, butterflies in your stomach as it dawns on you that he’s going to be the only person besides you to see the studio.

You and Lucifer end up staying there until Charlie calls him the next morning.

You notice paint on his chin after you get back to the hotel.

#lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #hazbin lucifer x reader

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libraford · 11 months

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Okay so here's what's going on with the bird crimes.

On thursday I was going to Powers Park when I saw what I thought were 2 chickens hanging out in the parking lot, and a lady watching them from the fence. I thought... they could belong to the lady, but chickens aren't the kind of pet that you just let hang out loose.

I approach.

Lady: "These aren't mine."

I look closer. Its actually 2 roosters, one of which is a very small breed and is missing his tail feathers. Both of them have an injury to their backside- like its been plucked.

So we talk about what to do, I end up calling Animal Control. The actual Animal Control officer doesn't get there until noon, I get a police dispatcher. She says she can send one of the cops to grab them until the actual professional gets there.

I tell her that the roosters are being kept by the woman I met, she's coaxing them into her house.

I post about it on the facebook group in case someone knows who they belong to. The comments are full of jokes, obviously. But no leads. Eventually the big rooster gets caught by someone running a sanctuary for abandoned and abused livestock, but they're still looking for the little black one. Evidently they got out of the lady's backyard and were loose again.

I figure he's going to be a coyote snack and don't think about it for the rest of the week.

So now it is Sunday and I'm opening up the bathrooms. I'm at Summit Grove park and as I'm about to reserve the shelter for a birthday party I see...

A black pigeon.

Pigeons are not a common animal in this area- you're more likely to see house sparrows, crows, and mourning doves. So that's odd. What's more, she doesn't seem to be skittish and is definitely accustomed to humans. And she keeps trying to bite my fingers, so she associates hands with food and she's skinny as a rail so she's been abandoned for a minute.

Why does this keep happening to me? Is this the Morrigan come to teach me a lesson in pigeon form?

So I remember the number of the woman running the sanctuary and I give her a call. I tell her I've got a pigeon here that can't fly, is super hungry, and doesn't seem to have any issues biting fingers. She says she can't take her, but she can find a home for her because pigeons have specific needs. But she won't be able to get there until 12:30. We (my work partner and I) have to deal with the bird in the meantime.

We absolutely cannot take this bird with us on our route because we are in a tiny truck cab and don't have a cat carrier to put her in. So our solution is to lock her in the janitor's closet until the rep can get here.

Around 12:15, we head back to the shelter to make sure she's still there and hasn't been disturbed... and I realize that the reason I even saw her in the first place...

...was because there was supposed to be a birthday party at the shelter at noon.

The party is strongly underway and they have shoved a table against the door of the closet.

The sanctuary lady comes by and waves, we ask the party people politely to move the table slightly because we're trying to rehome a pigeon that's inside that closet.

They move the table, but not all guests see this interaction- because it looks like a bunch of maintenance people are just here to boss folks around during a little girl's birthday party and this draws a crowd.

The sanctuary rep arrives and we open the door just a little bit to let the bird out. She bobbles towards us, hoping for food, when one of the older ladies at the party exclaims:

"Does that ANIMAL just LIVE in there?!"

I mean... sure. For the past few hours, she did live in there.

"Do you have any IDEA how many DISEASES pigeons carry?"

The rep scoops the pigeon into her arms and takes her out of the shelter area to inspect her wings, feet, and back. She shows us her breastbone and explains that its been several days since the bird ate anything, which was why it was going for fingers.

Meanwhile, Aunt Ornithophobia over here: "I can't BELIEVE you would just TOUCH a BIRD like that in front of CHILDREN!"

We take the bird away to the van so the rep can thank us and explain what likely happened- which is that someone abandoned the bird when they couldn't take care of her anymore they just let her loose.

"I understand you got one of the roosters," I said.

"Yes, the big one. But the little bantam rooster is very fast- he darted into someone's backyard and I never found him again. If you see him, give me a call."

"I've been told that chickens are legal to own here, but roosters are not."

She gets an exasperated look on her face. "If you're going to allow backyard chickens, you're going to have to allow roosters. It's impossible to sex an avian chick and they don't get their dimorphic traits until they've reached the young adult stage and chick sellers don't care about whether they're a hen or a rooster. They care about the sale. We get roosters more often than egg-layers because someone sold them a male as a female and they don't want to pay the fine. I'd rather have the laws allow both, or neither. But disallowing roosters is patently stupid."

"Hm. Well. Note to self."

"Anyways, you're heroes to this little rock dove and I want you two to know that. She's going on a trip to a bird sanctuary in Toledo where she'll have lots and lots of snacks to eat that aren't fingers."

#parks and wrecks #life as a temporary twig pig

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ajortga · 4 months

Text

always for you

pairing: jenna ortega x fem reader

thank you for your support! honestly i'm so so grateful you guys like my writing<3 this was from a request that i loved making, (especially the texting part.) requests are packed! theres so many more so i won't be checking inboxes till i'm finished with the majority of them! to whomever requested, i hope you like this!

can I request another soft!jenna x r?? I know your requests are closed, and you can do this anytime if your free. I can wait.

Where r's phone is acting up but doesn't want to buy a new phone cause r is broke, jenna sees r struggle with the lag and buys r a new phone

(shes so cute)

Jenna always thought you were too thoughtful and selfless, you always thought of others before yourself, you gave love to every person you possibly could before you could even love yourself.

You gifted Jenna the new black noise canceling headphones for Christmas, you loved music as much as she did. But even with your immense love, you still managed to have wired earphones, though they were tangled almost everyday.

There was a day the brunette noticed the way your phone had been acting up. She won’t mention how you dropped it in the bathtub while trying to give your cat a bath, and she’ll leave out how it somehow didn’t crack the numerous times you dropped it on the table or carpet. But whenever she texted you, you’d take longer to respond, apologizing endlessly.

“goodmorning my love! my phone was glitching again, it keeps bringing me back to this stupid dancing vegetable i put on for nephew cash last week. It took me a while to finally get back to messages! i'm sorry:((.”

“oh my god it did it again, now it’s a piece of radish dancing”

Sometimes you’d respond halfway and then stop there too cause your phone would crash

"y/nnnn, baby, i used the damn salt for our cookies instead of sugar and i put so much and i wanted to make a pickup line for you. i was literally pretending you were there and said "you're as sweet as a cookie" and i bit into it and it tasted so salty and i coughed so much"

“HAHA oh my gosh your like the silliest person i know, you literally remind me of-”"

10 minutes later

“MY PHONE CRASHED AGAIN”

“it did it again, it kept bringing me to different tabs so i had to get back in here. baby i can’t even talk to you properly anymore, i think we should-”

25 minutes later

“THE DANCING VEGETABLE IS ON MY SCREEN AGAIN”

"jenna? are you there?"

"i amm here"

"IT'S FRUIT NOW"

"baby 😭"

She did talk to you about getting a phone, she knew that you wanted to spend your money on others until yourself. You saved a little portion for yourself, so your portion made you a little broke. But you insisted that if it still worked and was helping the way it was supposed to, it would be okay.

It was funny to her, she would try charging both your phones before you snuggled to sleep together, but she always struggled on charging your phone because it wouldn’t charge.

You could hear her grunting as she cursed under her breath, “You have to use the first charging port and twist it at an 80 degree angle to the right, the phone has to be facing up.”

As it finally charged, she made a small sigh and smiled as she looked at you, softly saying, “You’re always too thoughtful Y/N, there’ll be one day where life will give it all back to you.”

You nuzzled into her chest, “As long as I can make others happy, that’s all I need to make myself happy,” you said drowsily as you rested on her chest. She kissed your forehead as you dozed off, cradling you to sleep.

The next day, Jenna got up so early and unattached herself from your grasp, making you make a small noise as you subconsciously looked for her embrace.

The bed creaked as you made a small murmur, looking up at Jenna barely awake.

You yawned, really sleepy, “Where are you going??” You said sadly, a little tired pout forming.

You sounded so drowsy as Jenna giggled, kissing your temple, “I need to pick up some strawberries, we need some pancakes for our breakfast and some other goodies sunshine. It’ll be packed in the afternoon, it’ll be quick, I promise.”

You made a sad noise, your hands reaching up for her and scrunching her arms as she hugged you, taking her giant stuffed animal and letting you hold it.

Soon enough from her scent on the stuffy, you were asleep, snuggling it.

Jenna changed into a sweater, jeans, and wore her headphones you gave her as she was off.

She was going to buy you that phone, no matter what you said.

Her footsteps crunched against the leaves as she listened to her music, getting a new idea as a proud smile sneaked on her lips.

She entered the electronic store, buying you the latest white phone that she had as well. She also went to the head gear section and bought you Sony headphones, a white one that would look so pretty on you. Her fingers signed the signature as she payed with her card, buying you guys two matching phone cases with two black cats on them.

Two hours later she came home, opening your bedroom door as she walked in.

“Y/N, sunshine, I’m here,” she whispered as you made a small murmur again, opening your eyes.

“Mhh…”

A small grin appears on her face as she shows you the new phone and headphones as you stare.

You were so tired you stared at it in disbelief and confusion.

Then you looked at her, your eyes teary as you pouted, “Baby.. Why? You didn’t have to-”

“You deserve it, you always think about me and all your friends hardly before yourself. And you deserve the world. I want you to be able to use your phone and those headphones. I like seeing you happy.”

Your pout turned into a wide smile as you pulled her collar to your level and hugged her tightly.

“Thank you. You really didn’t have to do that for me," you said, your voice happy as you nuzzle into her, not wanting to let go.

“Always.”

“I love you.”

Jenna smiles, her soft lips pressing to your temple, "I love you too."

#jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x fem!reader #jenna ortega x you #tara carpenter x reader #vada cavell x reader #jenna ortega imagine #jenna marie ortega #jenna ortega x y/n #tara carpenter x you #vada cavell x y/n

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ddejavvu · 9 months

Note

For multiverse Monday!! Where reader is so attracted to dealer!remus and she acts like she wants to buy from him but she only wants a chance to approach him and he knows it because that is so not like her and he is like “what is the real reason you’re talking to me?” And everything it’s like so flirty and there is tensionnn

today is multiverse monday, send me any au you can think of! :)

When Remus opens the door he honestly thinks he might be dreaming. After all, he's only hauled himself out of bed seconds ago to answer the timid knocks on his door, so he could be in some sort of fantasy. One where you're standing on his doorstep, little pink purse clutched in your quivering hands.

"Hello," He hums cautiously, "Did you need something?"

"I want to... to buy, uh," You lower your voice, leaning in to whisper, "Drugs."

Now he's sure he's dreaming. Because there's absolutely no way you'd ever be interested in anything illegal, especially not what he sells, because he's seen you scrunch your nose up at the smell before.

"Really," He feigns serious curiosity, stepping aside to let you into his apartment, "Well, you'd better come in then."

You peer cautiously around his living room, like you're worried the police have been lurking just behind the door, waiting to catch you. All you find is dirty laundry, basketball shorts in a heap on the floor beside his couch.

"What kind of drugs?" He asks, and something like fear flashes through your eyes.

"Marijuana." You say resolutely, like you've practiced in the car, "Uh, you sell that, right?"

"I do," He has to fight a grin off of his face at your demeanor, "How much weed do 'ya want?"

"Um," You fall silent and nervous, "Like- do you measure in pounds?"

Remus has to nearly bite through his tongue to stop from laughing.

"Alright, Y/N. Let's stop here. What do you really want?"

"Weed," You echo his slang from earlier, "I- I want to buy drugs, Remus, I told you."

"No, you don't." He narrows his eyes, resting his back against the now-closed door, "Come on, out with it. You and I both know you'd never do drugs, so why are you really here?"

You can't answer him. You can't muster up the courage to tell him you're only at his door to see his pretty face, but the more you twist your fingers together and gnaw at the inside of your cheek, he knows.

Apparently you're easy to read. His lips twist further up into a smirk the longer it takes you to answer, but when the silence becomes too much to bear, he steps in.

"If you're not here to buy weed," He muses, taking it painfully slow to induce the most heat to your cheeks, "Then I think you must be here for me, yeah? 'Cause there's no other reason people come to my place. Not like my cat's very friendly, you haven't come to see her. I returned that book on Greek mythology a week ago to the library, so you can't be after that. I'm the only option left. 'S that right?"

He's spelled it out plain and simple for you, and you don't think denial is an option anymore. You nod slowly, eyes timidly dropping to the floor. and you hear his soft huff of laughter even if you don't see the mixture of amusement and fondness that's on his face.

"Well I'm very flattered." He grins lazily, "Why don't you have a seat," Remus gestures to his couch, scratching an itch crawling up the back of his neck, probably from a crumb in his bed, "I'll get you some water, and we can watch a movie. That sound good?"

"Okay," You nod, relieved but still mortified by the whole ordeal as you sink into his couch cushions.

Remus has a semi-hard time finding you a clean glass, but when he returns, it's full of ice cold water. You take it gratefully, though you stiffen slightly with nerves when he plops down beside you on the couch, and he reaches for the remote with a scarred hand.

"I'm glad you were just trying to flirt with me, honey," He muses, clicking through the options of streaming services he has, "The way you were asking, I thought you were an undercover cop."

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dilemmaontwolegs · 5 months

Note

A litttle Geri moment because she is a queen, Geri showing you and Max all the photos she took of you while you guys were on the carpet and the loving interactions between the two of you while Max gets interviewed.

I think we are almost at the end of Gala Max requests 😅 what a strange two days we have had on this blog...

The Real Prize - A Mile High || MV1

Pre-Gala || The Real Prize || Jealousy || Panties || Captivity || Rocky || Escaping || Thighs || Consequences || A Mile High || New Beginnings

“Oh, these two have to be my favourites.” Geri turned her phone around to show the photo of you and Max on the red carpet.

She had been trying to get Max’s attention but he hadn’t been able to tear his eyes away from you. She had given up and took the picture that proved just how enthralled he was by you last night. She swiped across to the next one where a reporter had got his attention, asking the usual questions. You had turned to watch him answer the questions with the blunt honesty you loved about him. The adoration in both photos was palpable and you peeked over to Max sitting beside you to find the same smile on his face.

“Can you please send those to me?” you asked, grateful that Max’s plane had wifi.

She sent you a dozen shots she had taken during the night and you snuggled back into Max’s side as you swiped through them together. One had a glowing smile that was absolutely radiant and you knew exactly what had transpired minutes before it was snapped. Max did too as he chuckled and zoomed in on your face. “This is my favourite, schatje.”

“But what about this one?”

Geri loved to capture precious moments and it was certainly one. You had tears in your eyes as you proudly watched Max take the stage and accept his trophy. Your hands had been clasped together tightly in front of your lips as you fought the urge to clap and scream too early.

Your eyes were blurring after saving all the pictures and locking the screen. You hadn't had nearly enough sleep in the weeks of travelling but you were looking forward to heading home for some much needed rest. Just you and Max, and the cats.

"Oh, you poor thing, you must be tired from yesterday's activities," Geri fawned as she caught you yawning again. "Why don't you go have a sleep?"

"Hmmph, activities," Christian commented under his breath as he sipped an espresso.

"I'm fine here," you assured her as you fluffed a pillow on Max's lap to get comfortable before draping his arm over your waist.

Geri shook her head and put her phone down on the table. "What good is having a bed on this plane if you aren't going to use it?"

"I don't think they would get any sleep if they went to the bedroom, honey," Christian said with a knowing look.

"Not now," you murmured. "I would have nightmares."

Max brushed the fly-away hairs from your face and bent down to kiss your cheek, and, more importantly, whisper, "There's other places we could join the mile high club, schatje."

"Join?" You lifted an eyebrow as you rolled back and looked up at him. "Baby, you've already given me a lifetime membership."

"This is what I mean, honey," Christian said as he placed his empty cup down. "They forget there are other people in the room, they are in a world of their own."

"Leave them be, Chris, they are in love. Don't you remember that feeling?"

"I feel like that is a trick question and the answer is: No, because I still love you the same as I did ten years ago."

Geri giggled and playfully swatted her husband's arm. "You're learning."

You laughed at the couple and wondered if you and Max would be the same in ten years time. You hoped so.

#max verstappen fic #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen x reader #formula 1 fanfic #formula one fanfiction #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine

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bisexualiteaa · 11 months

Text

Them catching you listening to dirty songs 👀

Feat. John "soap" MacTavish, König, Simon "Ghost" Riley

Smutty suggestive themes 18+

John "Soap" MacTavish

Song: Dick by StarBoi3 feat. Doja cat

- You were both on your way to the gym for a good work out, (gym couple goals) when you'd noticed that one of your wireless earbuds had gone missing, but didn't really think anything of it, thinking you must have dropped one on the way out or accidentally left it at home.

- little did you know, Johnny nabbed it when you weren't looking, ever so curious of what you listened to when you were doing your sets and what music motivated you through your workouts.

- he found it rather normal at first, your usual selection of music playing for a bit, so when it played, he was as caught off guard as a deer in headlights. He was weight lifting when he heard the song play, and damn near dropped the weights when he heard it.

- he looked over at you, watching as you worked out your core and legs, mouthing the words as the main chorus hit, hitting your squats to the beat.

"She made some plans on my dick tonight"

"She not with him tonight, she not with Jim tonight"

"She in the gym tonight"

"Workout in that pussy (Ayy)"

"I'm gettin' ripped tonight"

"R.I.P that pussy (Ayy)"

"I'm goin' in tonight"

- his jaw was slack, watching you mouth the words to such a flithy song with a grin on your face, while at the gym of all places, but you were in your own little world.

- when your eyes met his gaze, you were none the wiser, giggling and waving at him happily as he watched you, thinking he was just checking you out or making sure no one was going to try and play moves on you. How could you be so cute and innocent but such a little demon too?

- he definitely needed to steal your earbuds more often, because afterwards, he made sure you made some plans with his dick that night.

König

Song: 34 + 35 by Ariana Grande

- you were all out at the bar drinking together after a rather rough week when the song came on.

- to start, he knew you could sing, you'd been together since before he joined Task Force 141, what he wasn't expecting was you to sing along to a song like this out in public

"Yeah, we started at midnight, go 'til the sunrise"

"Done at the same time"

"But who's counting the time when we got it for life?"

"I know all your favorite spots"

"We can take it from the top"

"You such a dream come true, true"

"Make a bitch wanna hit snooze, ooh"

"Can you stay up all night?"

"Fuck me 'til the daylight"

"34, 35"

"Can you stay up all night?"

"Fuck me 'til the daylight"

"34, 35"

- you sang the whole thing, making the rest of the guys at the table laugh and cheer you on as you sang, seeing as they'd never heard you sing before, let alone a song like this.

- König however? The second he actually added 34 and 35 together in his head, his face burned red, but the fact that you were singing it? Made it so much hotter, and harder to think with the pictures of you doing those things running rampant through his mind.

- "I think that's your que to take her home" Gaz spoke up with a knowing grin, making you chuckle as you watched König sit frozen and looking at you in disbelief.

- you and your comrades took far too much delight in his shy reaction, but when you two made it back home? You both Subtracted the clothes, he divided your legs and helped you add 34+35.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

Song: The Summoning by Sleep Token

- you were cooking breakfast when the song came on, usually liking to sing and dance to your music as you cooked.

- Simon was just waking up when he smelled what you were making, and he made it half way down the stairs when your music and the sight of you greeted him.

"Oh, and my love"

"Did I mistake you for a sign from God?"

"Or are you really here to cut me off?"

"Or maybe just to turn me on"

"'Cause these days"

"I would be lying if I told you that"

"I didn't wish that I could be your man"

"Or maybe make a good girl bad"

"I've got a river running right into you"

"I've got a blood trail, red in the blue"

"Something you say or something you do"

"The taste of the divine"

- he recognized it instantly from one of your nights of shared carnal passion, remembering how you melted at the way he moved his hips in time to the beat.

- he quietly treaded the rest of the way downstairs, his one hand wrapping around your throat as the other sat at your hip as he came up to you from behind, taking you off guard. But in the best possible way of course.

- "playing your favorite song, I see?" He asked, making you chuckle as he turned you around and kissed you.

- it wasn't long until breakfast was long forgotten, left to get cold as he bent you over the counter after replaying the song, pistoning his hips into you to the beat.

- and while breakfast may have grown cold, you certainly couldn't have been more of the opposite.

#cod imagine #cod smut #john soap mactavish #john soap mctavish x reader #könig smut #könig #könig imagine #simon ghost riley #simon riley smut #simon riley imagine #cod x reader

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joelscruff · 1 year

Note

hi cat! not sure if ur taking requests but i have a small idea for bf’s dad!joel .. maybe joel giving reader a facial after she’s feeling insecure abt her bf not giving her enough attn so he shows her that all he needs is her face to finish

prove it (boyfriend's dad!joel x f!reader) 18+

tysm for the yummy request, anon!! i've decided to combine this request with another one i got the other day: "ok bear with me but what if boyfriends dad joel came in reader and then her bf wants to have sex and sees that she still has his come inside her??? i'm going to hell." i did tweak the second request a bit (sorry!!!) but the general idea is the same. this takes place in the same universe as quickie & snack break except this one definitely has a bit more plot. summary: joel shows you how much he cares about you (in a slightly depraved way) rating: 18+ explicit (mdni) warnings: daddy!kink, dirty talk, praise kink, facials, comeplay, oral (f receiving), voyeurism word count: 2.6k (woops)

"i'm so sick of him," tears are streaming down your face as you push joel's home office door open, stomping inside and slamming it behind you. he looks up from where he's sitting at his desk, poring over blueprints for some contracting job he's got coming up, a job that's been taking up all his time as of late.

"angel, what are you doin' here?" he stands up immediately, brow furrowed in concern as he opens his arms to you, "c'mere, what's wrong?"

"why am i even with him?" you groan, head coming to rest against his chest as his arms wrap around you and hold you close, "i don't even like him."

"what'd he do?" joel murmurs against your hair, stroking your back soothingly, "he hurt you?"

"he's just an asshole," you sniffle pathetically against his button down, "i try to be close to him and he just pushes me away, just wants to play his stupid games and pretend i don't exist."

"babygirl, i'm so sorry," he whispers, "what can i do?"

"just wanted to be near you," you sniff, "i only want you, i don't want him anymore."

you feel him tense a bit, tightening his grip around you, "are you gonna break up with him?"

you're not sure what to say, just cry harder into his shirt and revel in the way his arms tighten around you, keeping you safe and soothed. you both know that a breakup has been inevitable for a while, but you're both also aware of the way it'll affect the relationship the two of you share. you won't have an excuse to be at his house anymore, to sneak into his office and have your private moments. you'll have to start meeting in secret, in public. you've been putting it off for as long as you can.

"i don't wanna think about that right now," you whisper shakily, "i just wanted to feel like someone gave a shit about me."

"babygirl," he whispers, bringing his hand up to touch your chin and pull your face up to look at him, peering softly at you with his deep brown eyes, "i give a shit about you, i always will."

"but i've barely seen you lately," you figure you might as well tell him what's on your mind now that you're already baring your emotions to him, "you've been so busy with work. you haven't even kissed me in two weeks."

"two weeks?" his brow furrows again, "baby, i'm sorry. i didn't realize it'd been that long. c'mere," he leans down and kisses you softly, lips capturing yours in that quiet and secret way he reserves only for you, tender and gentle. you kiss back with fervor, tasting him on your tongue, relishing in the feeling of having him to yourself again.

"what do you need, sweetheart?" he whispers against your lips, "need to sit in my lap for a bit? need me to fuck you? just say the word, i'll give it you."

"just wanna know that you still care," your eyes still sting with tears despite the immense comfort you feel from being at his mercy once again, "you still want me, don't you, daddy?"

"yes, baby," he pulls back to look at you intensely, expression set in a sincere expression, "i want you all the time. i swear."

"prove it," you repeat, "show me."

his eyes darken then, throat bobbing as he nods and drops his arms from around you, "take off my belt, babygirl."

you do as you're told, pulling the belt from its loops and tossing it to the floor. you unzip his jeans and he helps you pull them down. you can already see the outline of his cock through his underwear, eyes widening when you see how hard he already is.

"you see that? that's what you did to me the second you came in my office," he breathes, and you feel his hand settle gently on your shoulder, thumb stroking the bare skin of your neck, "that's all for you, only you."

you reach forward and palm him through his underwear, staring at the large bulge and swallowing when it twitches under your fingers, pulses. you stroke him slowly, still inhaling and exhaling deeply to stop your tears.

"mine," you whisper, squeezing his girth gently. you make quick work of pulling his cock from the confines of the fabric, salivating immediately when you see that he's already at his full size, throbbing and leaking profusely. your lips part and he leans forward to press a kiss to your forehead.

"yours," he replies, "you're so beautiful, baby, can't help but get hard just from seein' you, huggin' you," he pulls back and gives you one of his special kisses, directly on the tip of your nose. you can't help but smile, warmth flooding your chest, "get on your knees, babygirl."

you kneel before him, peering up at him from your teary lashes as he strokes his hard cock a few times, the tip ghosting lightly against your lips. you open your mouth for him, silently urging him to slip inside. he shakes his head.

"i wanna show you how crazy you make me, baby," he breathes, stroking a bit faster, "wanna show you fast i can come just from looking at that pretty face."

you look up at him in awe, mouth closing and tears stinging your eyes again as you watch him come undone with just a few strokes, staring directly into your eyes.

"watch daddy's cock," he whispers, "see how bad i want you, baby? see how hard you make me?"

you bite down on your lip, watching his hand stroke his length up and down over and over again, pulsating and throbbing in his fist. the wide tip continues to drool over his fingers, onto the floor. your pussy is already starting to soak your underwear at the mere sight of joel losing himself like this.

"gimme your come, daddy," you mewl, face scrunching with desire as you look back up at his face and watch him come apart.

"could never say no to you, babygirl," he groans, and with one final stroke he finishes, cock bobbing pornographically in his hand as he aims the sticky tip at your face and releases his come all over your lips, your cheeks, your chin. you even feel some spurt against your forehead, dripping down the bridge of your nose. your eyes close involuntarily, focused entirely on the feeling of his warm release covering every inch of your face.

you stay kneeling on the floor with your eyes closed, breathing in and out slowly. you hear him tug his zipper back up and then he's helping you stand, leading you over to the couch in the corner of the room. you open your eyes again when you feel him crouch between your legs, pulling down your shorts and panties in one strong tug.

"what are you-"

he interrupts your query when he ducks his head between your thighs, places his mouth on your clit and begins to suck. you let out an obscene moan, tossing your head back as your hands find a place in his hair. you tug on his greying locks as he licks and sucks your pussy relentlessly, barely coming up for air as he devours you.

"oh fuck," you whimper, and you look down just in time to see him peering up at you through hooded and hazy eyes, drunk on his orgasm and your pussy, "joel, oh my god."

he pulls back for a moment, smirking deliciously, "you know better than to call me joel, sweetheart" he licks a stripe up your center, sloppy and loud, "who am i?"

"daddy," you say, voice wrecked as you grip the couch cushions for support, "you're my daddy."

"good girl," he murmurs, then sucks your clit into his mouth with no hesitation, smiles against your heat when you begin to shake and writhe with your orgasm. your eyes shut tightly and you're vaguely aware of a drop of joel's come sliding down your eyelash to your cheek, reminding you that his release is still all over your face.

"love treating my babygirl like the princess she is," he whispers as he stands up from between your legs and inches in beside you on the couch, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you in close, "covered in daddy's come, pussy all swollen and satisfied, just what you deserve."

you hum in agreement, body lax against his on the couch. you feel him swipe a finger across your face, clearing up some of his release. you whimper when you feel him bring his fingers to your pulsing pussy, pushing his come inside of you and placing his hand over your hole to keep it in.

"this is mine," he murmurs, thumbing your clit gently, "you're mine. no one else's."

"i'm yours, daddy," you whimper, eyes still closed as joel swipes another fingerful of come off your face and repeats the previous gesture, slipping it past your throbbing entrance, "i don't wanna be with him anymore."

"okay, babygirl," he says softly, "we'll figure it out."

a sudden loud knock on the door snaps you both out of your private moment. you hear your boyfriend say your name on the opposite side, loud and firm followed by, "i know you're in there."

your eyes widen, a fear you've never felt before etched all over your face as you look frantically at joel. your expression is enough for him to understand your sudden horror.

you forgot to lock the door.

you both stand up, joel reaching for your panties at the same moment you reach for your shorts. he thrusts them at you and pushes you toward his office bathroom door, not saying a word in his absolute panic, just wanting to make sure you're hidden away. just as the bathroom door shuts with you inside, you hear the office door open.

"where is she?" you hear your boyfriend say angrily, "i heard her voice, i know she's here."

"calm down," joel says, stern and serious, "give her a minute, she's upset."

"she's fucking dramatic is what she is," your boyfriend growls, "jesus, dad, why are you always on her fucking side?"

"because she comes crying to me about you almost every time she's here," joel's voice is strained, clearly angry but holding back as best he can, "if you don't start treatin' her right, you're gonna lose her."

"i don't give a shit, she's not fucking worth it."

"no, you're not fucking worth it," joel says, voice getting louder, "why she's still with you is a fucking mystery to me, i didn't raise you to treat women like this."

"she's just a girl, dad. chill the fuck out."

"she is not just a girl," joel's voice is booming now, "and you'd fucking realize that if you actually talked to her."

the entire time they've been talking you've been quietly wiping your face, cleaning up as silently as you can while you listen to their argument. you toss the wet cloth in the hamper when you're done and press your ear up against the door, feeling tears prick in your eyes again. you're not sure what you're more emotional about, your boyfriend being horrible or joel defending your honor. either way you suppose a fresh outpour of tears will help the situation seem a little more normal when you leave the bathroom.

"i'm done with this," your boyfriend is saying, almost spitting with frustration, "stay out of it dad, i mean it. let me see her."

"give her a minute," joel repeats, "she needs some space."

"let. me. see. her." your boyfriend enunciates each word, voice harsh and rough; you can tell he's getting closer and closer to the bathroom door.

to save joel from doing something he'll regret you shove open the bathroom door, eyes downcast, "i wanna go home," you say quietly, tears streaming down your face again, "someone just take me home, please."

joel had immediately offered but your boyfriend had shut him down, walking toward you with softening eyes.

"i'm sorry, babe," he'd said, suddenly a different person now that he saw how upset you were, "i'll take you home."

now you're sitting in his car, watching the neon lights go by through the window as he drives you home in silence. it's raining and depressing and all you want is to be back with joel, safe and desired.

once you get to your house your boyfriend parks in the driveway and turns to look at you, "you ready to talk yet?"

you stare, "i have nothing to say."

he turns away from you, grinding his teeth together, "why are you always such a fucking bitch?"

you turn silently in your seat, arms crossed as you continue to stare out the window. you could get out of the car but you know he'll just follow you, probably start yelling in front of your house so all the neighbors can hear you. it's happened before.

"why do you always go to my dad?" he asks, shaking his head, "i don't get it. he gives terrible advice."

"maybe i don't go to him for advice," you say immediately. "maybe i go to him so someone will actually listen to me for once."

"well you're annoying the shit out of him is what you're doing," he says harshly, "he's just too nice to tell you to leave him alone."

"is that right?" you ask, biting down on your lip to keep yourself from absolutely losing it.

"yeah, that's right."

you sit in silence for a few more moments, still biting back all the awful things you want to say. i'm fucking your dad, you wish you could snarl at him, i call him daddy and he fucking loves it.

"listen... i'm sorry," he says turning to look at you again, "i know i'm an asshole sometimes."

you twist your mouth, tears still spilling over as you cross your arms tighter against your chest.

"let's just sleep on it, okay?" he murmurs, reaching over to push a strand of hair behind your ear, "and if you wanna break up with me in the morning then we'll deal with it."

you sigh shakily, nodding, "fine."

he strokes the skin behind your ear and you feel his fingers suddenly freeze. you look over at him and see him peering curiously at something.

"what?" you ask, confused.

"what's this in your hair?" he asks, making a face, "looks like..."

your eyes widen and you pull back immediately, "it's moisturizer, i was trying to make my face less puffy."

he stares at you, slightly confused by your reaction. his hand slowly comes down from your hair and he looks like he wants to say something, mouth opening and then closing again. instead, he turns away from you and puts both hands on the wheel, knuckles flexing white.

"i think you should get out now," he says quietly.

your eyes are still wide, unsure if he believes your lie or not. slowly you unbuckle your seatbelt and reach for the handle of the door, still peering at him with a frightened gaze. he turns to look at you again, jaw set tightly.

"tell me that's not what i think it is," he says, voice hard and firm.

"it's moisturizer," you repeat, trying to keep your voice as relaxed as possible, "i swear."

he just continues to stare at you with an unreadable expression as you open the car door and get out. as soon as you shut it behind you his tires squeal against the pavement of your driveway, pulling out fast and dangerously. you watch his car disappear down the street as you stand there, goosebumps rising on your skin from the chilly nighttime air.

you yank out your phone and quickly send a text to joel, eyes still wide:

i think he knows.

---

thank you sm for reading!! this little miniseries definitely isn't my best work by any means but it's fun to write. this one got way longer and way more plotty than i was expecting lmao but i hope it was enjoyable for somebody!

here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip 💖

#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #*#shit gets crazy idek how i got here #fic: bd!joel

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elliesmistress · 1 month

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EPISODE 1: PILOT

WARNINGS: 18+, heavy drug usage (cocaine, weed, alcohol, etc), oral sex (R, E, D, A, ETC), tribbing, overdoses (reader), mentions of overdoses, angst, EVERYONE WILL BE IN COLLEGE AS EUPHORIA IS SET IN HIGHSCHOOL!, mentions of self harm, Jules will be transgender (same in the show, except sex won't be with her), shoplifting, mentions of death, NATE and his family will most likely be left out of this completely and set with new characters that are less toxic, dealer!ellie (sometimes), drug deals, swearing, less abusive relationships but still toxic, mentions of rehab, rehab (detox), death, degradation, toxic sex, rough sex, strap usage, strap sucking, mentioning of 9/11, lmk if I missed anything please!

a/n: this will be VERY similar to Euphoria, you will be RUE (Due to it being "your" story I will be writing it with 'I' as Rue talks). I just need to figure out where abby, dina, jesse, etc will fit into the story. I do know abby will be CAT very likely all the characters will be the exact same (besides from Nate and his parents) I've struggled with a few of the problems in Euphoria and I've written my own fic about MY addictions but I figured I'd do Euphoria too hehe, I will be removing the SA parts of the story because that's just something I don't want to have on my page. Please let me know if you want to be on the taglist whilst I actually have inspo to write :) 3.8K WORDS, spell checked and shit idk man it's like 4 hours past my bed time and 1am

I WILL BE MAKING A EUPHRIA PLAYLIST FOR EACH CHAPTER!

Taglist: @snowy-vee , @vqxen @pedropascalsbbg

PRESENT DAY

"I was once happy, content, sloshing around in my own private primordial pool." I am standing in front of hundreds of people who are here listening to my story—to say the very least, I was nervous. I always have been a fucking addict, and now I'm telling my story of how I recovered from this fucking disease that ruined my fucking life.

"Then one day, for reasons beyond my control, I was repeatedly crushed." I blink my eyes, looking at the floor, struggling to find the right words: "over and over by the cruel cervix of my mother, Grace."

"I put up a good fight, but I lost, for the first time, and definitely not my last... I was born three days after 9/11."

Memories flood back to when I could hear the TV going on the day I was born.

"I can hear you; I can hear you; the rest of the world hears you; and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon." The unknown man says on the TV that hearing the words "USA, USA!" being chanted over and over again made me cry as a baby. Those chants will forever haunt me.

"My mom and dad spent two days in the hospital, holding me under the soft glow of the television, watching the towers fall over and over again, until the feelings of grief gave way to numbness." I shift uncomfortably in the silence of the audience, glancing at my good friends Jesse and Ellie, who indicate for me to keep talking. A soft chuckle comes from my lips as I continue on with the story.

"And then," I take a deep breath, "without warning, we moved to a friendly neighborhood in the suburbs, to where a middle-class child, me to be exact, was looking up at the ceiling, counting those fucking numbers like I could fucking see them. Over and over again. 'thirteen... fourteen... fifteen... sixteen."

"My mother looked up at that ceiling like I was fucking crazy; the words she said echo through my dumb brain still: 'What are you looking at, y/n?'" "I kept counting, trying my hardest to ignore her. She said to me, 'y/n, look at me."

I chuckle. "I bet you all know where this is going. I kept counting, but from the start," and my smile dropped immediately.

"I remember breaking down and crying when my mother tried to snap me out of it. I wanted... I had nothing but to cry, so that's what I did. I sat in a doctor's office a few weeks later with my mother crying next to me as the doctor said I could be suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder, attention deficit disorder, general anxiety disorder, and possible bipolar disorder." I put my hand up close to the mic to cup it. "But I was a little too young to tell," I said in a joking tone, cracking a laugh from the crowd. "Y'all get me; y'all fucking get me."

"With this being said, I was put on medication to treat half of the disorders I had, and to be honest, I don't remember much between the ages of 8 and 12. Just that the world moves fast and my brain moves so fucking slowly."

"I would sit my fucking ass in class every day and try my hardest to listen to what that fucking teacher was trying to teach, but sometimes I would focus on my breathing a little too hard. I'd die. That teacher held a bag to my mouth to calm my breathing, though it never really helped. I remember trying to outrun my anxiety every day, looking in the mirror and trying to push my stomach in so I wouldn't look "fat."

"I would constantly get messages from people telling me they wanted to kill me, drug me, make fun of me, and bully me. My mother knew something was up and constantly asked me what was wrong, but I always gave the same response: 'I'm just fucking exhausted."

AGE 19 (college years)

"You said the doctor was in our network. How could he suddenly be out of network?" I hear my mother say as I walk out of my room into the kitchen, "I can't afford it" Grace says.

"did you see the beauty queen who got acid thrown in her face?" My sister says as I begin to lean on the dinning room table. "Mm, what? No" I say, turning my attention to her and out of my trance. "it's pretty fucked up." She says holding up her phone. "Hey, Mom, you got any tampons?" I turned my head to face her as she looked at the documents in her hand, I knew full well I wasn't going to be getting tampons but she didn't need to know that shit.

"in my bathroom, under the sink." She replies back, I swiftly make my way to the bathroom.

I enter her bathroom and cough as I open her medicine cabinet to take a few of her Alprazolam (XANAX) pills.

I would do this countless times, and surprisingly at some point, you make a choice about who you are and what you want in life.

I pretend to flush the toilet and I look at the picture in my mother's bathroom- it had my dad and my Mom on it on their wedding day.

I look at myself in the mirror washing my hands and putting on sunglasses to hide my pupils that are almost as big as my actual eye itself- I get out of the bathroom to go back into the kitchen

"alright, Jayda, let's roll." I say to my sister as she looks at me and frowns, probably these fucking sunglasses.

"y/n, did you eat breakfast?" Grace says, moving the phone away from her mouth. "I had coffee!" I yell out, opening the front door and making my way out.

Jayda and I begin to walk down the sidewalk, she turns her attention onto me and asks what's with the sunglasses.

"what sunglasses?" I say and chuckle, Jayda laughs with me.

We both make our way to the bus and wait for it to arrive, once it arrives we get on the bus and make our way to the back of the bus.

I guess... I showed up one day, without a map or a compass... Or to be honest, anyone capable of giving on iota of good fucking advice. And I know it all may seem sad, but guess what? I didn't build this system nor did I fuck it up.

I was sitting at a party, with a galaxy book to my knees and a line of cocaine, holding the perfectly rolled 5 dollar bill that had been rolled by some rando.

I snort the line of cocaine and immediately felt the pain in my nose, moving my hand up to my nose and applying pressure to where it is painful, making my breathing hitch, then speeding up my breathing in order to get rid of the pain.

My pupils immediately shot big, looking around—everything felt good, my mind at ease and nothing to worry about. I sit up with the most unreal experience, an out-of-body feeling as I struggle to get up.

"y/n, you good?" My friend Ellie attempts to hold my shoulders to steady me as I wobble slightly, I giggle and smile at her, escaping her grasp. "I'm good!"

I walk past people- everything is in slow motion, my body feels slow, my mind feels slow, and suddenly I no longer feel as high- I find another unknown substance and waste no time snorting it, sitting down on the couch.

I sat back up from the couch I was sitting at, getting offered yet another line of cocaine. I snort that cocaine as well, that leaves it hard for me to breathe, every time I take a breathe out. It feels like I'm breathing out all the oxygen I have.

And then it happens. That moment when your breath starts to slow, and every time you breathe, you breathe out all the oxygen you have. And everything stops: your heart, your lungs, then finally your brain. Then everything you feel, and wish, and want to forget, it all just sinks. And then suddenly... You give it air again, give it life again, and that's what leaves you needing more.

I smile at the figure I see besides me, her face is blurred but she's speaking to me, I feel scared. "I want to call an ambulance" I say in my mind, "but I don't wanna ruin everyone's time"

"dude get her fucking legs" I hear muffled voices, slowly waking up. It was Ellie and Jesse dragging my body to Ellie's bed, after I had passed out on the couch at that random frat party-

I stand in a church with my hands behind my back, looking up at the ceiling waiting to graduate from rehab. Slowly making my way up the steps, I look at the lady and give her a smile and a nod before exiting the building.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Echoing in my mind over and over again as I make my way to Ellie's car.

"Hey!" I see Ellie running up to me. I drop my bags as she pulls me into a tight hug. I smiled at her shoulder. She squeals, letting go of me and looking at my face, pulling a hair strand behind my ear.

"I've missed you," she admits. "I've missed you too."

"What about we go back to mine and we can watch a movie?" Ellie suggests that, honestly, I wanted to get home and get out to my fucking dealer. I never had intentions of staying clean, but she didn't need to know.

"Uh yeah, sure," I say, quickly breaking myself out of my own stance. She helps me with my bag, and she puts it in Joel's old, beat-up truck, and I get into the front seat. "Everyone's missed you, dude, Abby, Dina, Jesse, and Maddie. Fucking everyone, dude."

I chuckle.

I cuddle up with Ellie in her dad's garage as we watch Jurassic Park. I'm on top of her, listening to her breathing—she's relaxed; she's always around me.

I find myself nuzzling into her neck. She moves her head to the side, so you have better access to her neck. I softly kiss her neck; she's always so soft.

Her eyes flutter shut as I start to suck on her neck, her hands finding their way to my ass, slowly rocking me back and forth to grind on her. Ellie let out a choked moan as she felt my clothed cunt rub against her clit.

"Y/N, fuck," she moans. I smile against her neck and make my way to Ellie's lips.

I kiss her slowly, but Ellie starts to become desperate, whining into my mouth as I refuse to give her what she wants. I move my hand underneath her hoodie to find her tits; of course she's not wearing a fucking bra or shirt under her jumper. It's Ellie.

"Wait," I say, pulling down her pants and boxers in one go. I look at her swollen cunt, slowly moving my head downward to lick up her slit, making my way to her clit.

She bucks her hips up into my tongue, I moan into her cunt, and she tangles her hand in my hair, slightly tugging upwards, making me groan loudly.

"S-sh-it," her voice is choked. "Fuck, just like that," she moans, rolling her eyes back, her toes curling in her socks. "Hmm? Feel good, baby?" I say to her, slowly lifting my head up, abandoning her swollen cunt.

"Fucking don't," she threatened, and I chuckled. I push my middle finger into her soaking pussy as I attach back to her clit; her breathing gets faster, and I feel her tighten around my fingers.

"F-FUCK!" She moans loudly, and I feel her pussy conract on my finger as she cums, her fingers tugging at my hair. "A bit loud, don't you think?" I tease after letting her ride out her orgasm, and I move up to kiss her sweaty forehead. "Shut up"

"got another in you?" I smirk, taking off my pants, t-shirt, and bra. Ellie takes off her jumper, leaving us both naked. I allow Ellie to get up and let her go on top of me.

Ellie aligns her clit up with mine and moans quickly, filling the room each time Ellie moves her hips. I start to dig your nails into Ellie's back, making her groan in pain.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Ellie chants from the overstimulation. "C'mon, baby, I know—fuck, I know you can do it." I praise her as I feel a knot in my stomach, threatening to come undone.

Ellie moves her shoulder closer to my face. I take this as an opportunity to bite down on her shoulder, which makes her wince in pain.

"I'm going to fucking cum!" Ellie moans out. Hearing Ellie say this triggers my own orgasm, and we both cum together.

I sit up in bed watching Ellie sleep, and I take out my phone to look at the time.

4AM

"Fuck it," I think before opening Ellie's window slowly, climbing out her window, and making my way to my dealer's house.

"There's a new girl in town I think you're going to be friends with." I stand in front of my dealer, who's sitting down in his chair. "who?" I question.

"shit... I don't know, man. She came in yesterday lookin' all Sailor Moon and sh*t. I'm thinking to myself, "You look like somebody you would get along with."

"Ah, real nice, dude. Really nice, where's ash?"

"I thought you went to rehab?"

"Doesn't that mean I stayed sober?" I smiled, walking towards Ash's room with a smile. I opened his door to see him eating cereal. He puts down his bowl and looks at me.

"Shit, I thought your ass was dead."

"I thought you had Asperger's till I realized you're just a prick." I insult him. "This is a fickle industry. Y'all come and go." He chuckles.

I ask for what I want, and he hands it to me. "Sure, you don't want to try anything new?"

"Like, what?" I asked, pulling the hair out of my face.

"2-C-T-2, 2C-T-7, and 5-MeO-DIPT." "I have no idea what the fuck you just said, Ash."

"Doesn't matter, dude, this sh*t. Is fucking lit?" He holds up a bag with two unknown pills. "It's a fast-acting psychedelic. I have some similarities to LSD, but with, like, key differences. Not as visual and shit, but still a sense of distortion... I don't know what's been blowing up in Tampa, and mad people like to fuck on it."

"okay, yeah." I say, putting all the baggies in my pocket, "That'll be 120."

"Fez said he'd spot me."

"Fezco, don't spot anybody."

"Yeah, well, it's a post-rehab discount, so you should ask him." I say, pointing the middle finger at him, opening his door, and leaving.

"Do you think my areolas look weird?" Dina says to Abby, "What the fuck, no?"

"Just the edges."

"Dina, they're fine," Abby says, taking a puff of the weed Cassie gives her.

"Fine, like, they're weird, kind of weird, or fine, like, nobody but me would ever notice what I would notice?"

"Fine, like, shut the fuck up, Dina," Cassie says, sitting up, grabbing her vape, and taking a puff. Dina scoffs, pulling up her t-shirt to cover her boobs.

"Hey ladies!" Jesse walks in. "Hey baby," Dina squeals, running to Jesse and hugging him. Abby cringes.

"Straight people, ew," she thinks to herself, looking at her phone. "Yo, you got out of rehab."

"Didn't she die?" Dina asks, and Abby shrugs.

"Yeah, I swear she died. I don't know, is Ellie coming to the party?" Jesse questions, to which Dina nods.

I get off my bike at home, slightly drugged up from the drugs I took earlier.

I walk into the house, softly shutting the door.

"Where were you?" My mother says, sitting at the table, Why the fuck is she up at 6 a.m.? You thought to yourself: "I went to eat," I lie. "What the fuck do you mean, you went to eat?"

"what?"

"what?" She mocks, "Don't walk away from me." She sits up from her seat, walking towards me as I walk towards my room. "You know what, y/n? I don't trust you."

"I don't know what you want me to say." It's true; I didn't know why she wanted me to say it. "I want you to tell me where you were," she says, walking quickly as I walk to my room.

"I just said I went to fucking eat!" I yell at her, "Don't you talk to me like that!" Grace says as I slam the door on her face. "Don't be slamming my doors around here."

"It was a fucking accident!" I yell out, holding my body in front of the door. "I don't care. You're not leaving this house until you take a drug test."

"I just peed!" I yell out, "Slam another door."

"Shit," I say, making my way to my bed, not knowing what to do. Every option I could do is unsafe as fuck.

Niacin, maybe. I don't know fuck, I think to myself, putting out my phone to look at the side effects.

Google

Side effects: skin flushing, extreme dizziness, vomiting, rapid heartbeat, and sometimes death.

Fuck, I can't.

"No drug site recommends doing this" I whisper to myself.

The other option is to get a non drug-addicted friend to do it for me.

About 20 minutes later, I show up at Dina's door, knocking.

"y/n!" Dina says, opening the door, smiling and hugging me, "I thought you died."

I laugh. "Can you do me a favor?" Uhm, I'm serious, bro."

"Sure, what is it, y/n?"

"Can you, uh, piss in this cup for me?" I whisper to her . "You're fucking with me, right?" She responds back, and I laugh and shrug.

Dina agrees to do it, and I enter her house to see Jesse and Abby.

"Sup Jesse," I say, fist bumping Jesse, then Abby.

"We thought you fucking died, bro. How was rehab?" Jesse says it with a genuine tone. "Yeah, it was good." I turn to Abby and ask, "How's football going?"

"Yeah, good. Thanks, uh, are you coming to that party tonight?" Abby asks, "Uhm, yeah, maybe."

"y/n" Dina grabs your attention, you move away from Jesse and Abby, and she swiftly hands you the bottle. "Here's that eyeliner."

"thank you"

I quietly climb through my window, grabbing my baggie of crushed cocaine, tipping some out onto my shelf, grabbing my 5 dollar note, rolling it up, and snorting a line.

"Argh," I groan, feeling it hit my nose. The same pain I've always experienced with snorting was still there—just muffled out. By this point, my nose was completely fucked, and I could hear the sound of the drugs eating away at my nose.

"Mom! I have to pee."

"I wish we could do this in a way that wasn't a complete invasion of my privacy." I say, cup in hand, struggling not to smile at her due to the drugs I had taken earlier on.

"Well, you lost your right to privacy after your overdose," your mom says, staring at you in the eyes.

"That was an accident." I smartly talk back, "Don't be flippy, y/n."

"Could you, at least?" Your mom turns around and says, "Thank you."

I sit down, and before "peeing" in the cup, I swiftly change it with Dina's urine as she talks. I wasn't listening to whatever the fuck she was saying... I was high as fuck, and I didn't care.

I gave her the urine sample, and she put the drug test in the container, and all of them came out negative. "I'm sorry for slamming the door earlier."

"it's okay. I forgive you. Come here." My mom says, pulling me in for a hug.

I guess... Like I said before, you get to choose who you want to be and how you want to be- the way the drugs cancelled out all my emotions was what I was looking for, no person, no nothing could compare to that feeling. Besides from drugs.

"I'm gonna stay at Dina's tonight" i say to which she agrees.

It's now 7PM, I don't know how the day went by so fast- but it did and it fucking sucked. I get a text from Ellie.

Ellie: Yo, noticed you left this morning you okay?

Me: yeah, I'm good bro. You alg?

Ellie: yep! Wanna come over tonight? Dont have to if you wanna go to the party instead

Me: I'll come over around like 11?

I find myself making my way to the party that Jesse, Dina, and Abby are going to.

Jesse and Dina have fucked off somewhere else, probably making out or fucking, and you find yourself next to Abby.

"How was rehab, y/n?" She says, breaking the tension, although I can barely hear her over the music, "Yeah, it was good!" I yell over the music.

I stand up, looking for the bathroom in an attempt to snort more, but people were already in the bathroom. "Shit," I think to myself, not paying attention to where I'm walking, accidentally bumping into this lady.

"fuck!" I yell. Looking at her, she looks like the girl Faz mentioned. "Hey, sorry." I retrace my steps.

"You're good; I'm, uh, I'm Jules," she says, and I smile, holding out my hand to shake hers. She accepts and shakes my hand.

She's got one of the most beautiful smiles you have ever seen; her smile is so bright it could light up an entire dark room, filled with nothing but sadness.

"I'm y/n" I introduce myself, to which we exchange numbers, and I make my way to Ellie's place, feeling overwhelmed from the party.

I knock on her door for Joel to answer; my pupils are dilated, and obviously I've taken some sort of drug.

"y/n... Hey, Ellie's in her room." I smile stupidly. These fucking drugs, man, I can't stop smiling . I swiftly walk past Joel and see Ellie. I smile at her, and she smiles back. "Dude, are you high?" She scoffs, "I thought... I thought you quit."

"I'm not high, Ellie, mania." I giggle; she obviously doesn't want to assume, so she wants to give me the benefit of the doubt.

"Are you coming back to college this month?" She questions. "Yeah, probably." The truth was, I didn't want to. But I knew I probably had to.

I shall leave it at this due to how many words, etc. and idk if people will like this 😭😭

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writingseaslugs · 10 months

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Diasomnia: When You're Sick

The last dorm, and probably the one dorm you don’t want taking care of you…minus Silver. Hope you guys enjoyed this dorm series, I know I did. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to skedaddle back to work. Also the intro is the same for all parts, so if you’ve read it once, you’ve read it all.

Disclaimer: All characters in this series are aged up. For more information about my version of this world and the type of reader you can expect, please click the “Au Information” below!

Request Information | Masterlist | Au Information

Diasomnia: When You’re Sick

The worst thing to ever happen to you while attending Night Raven College had to be, hands down, getting sick. You were alone in the dorm with only ghosts and Grim to keep you company, and as much as you loved them, they couldn’t take care of you when you became sick. This meant you had to make do and hope that everything was alright. Normally if you were under the weather, you’d just suck it up and go to class so as to not worry anyone. This time however, that wasn’t an option.

You woke up with every muscle in your body feeling sore and aching with even the slightest movement. Your stomach churned something fearsome and you had a runny nose and cough to boot. You had no idea what illness you had fallen to. Having so many symptoms…you could only assume it was the flu or something akin to that.

Still, there was no way you were making it to class like this. So begrudgingly you told Grim you weren’t feeling good and needed to rest, and to go to class and get your homework so you could do it later. The demon cat was grumpy about not having his henchman, but eventually gave in, leaving you alone to rest in your room and hope that whatever you had would go away.

Malleus Draconia

Sebek will be the one mentioning you being sick in passing, noting how Grim had been out of control due to your absence. That’s all Malleus needs to hear before he’s sneaking away from his retainers and going over to your dorm. Thankfully you’re asleep when he appears in your room. He’s standing over your bed, looking over you and placing his large hand over your forehead, noting that it’s warmer than it should be. This prompts him to call up Lilia to inform him of the situation. That’s where the trouble begins.

Malleus has no clue how to care for a human, so it’s already off to a rocky start. Lilia himself knows a little bit, as he had to take care of Silver. The thing with Silver is, other than the narcolepsy, he was always a fairly healthy child…according to Lilia. Really he just always missed the signs that Silver was sick or though it was just a quirk. So now you have two fae over your bed, trying to figure out what’s wrong as you slowly wake up and meet their eyes. You might have a heart attack that devolves into a coughing fit as Malleus is frantically trying to help you.

You’re going to be the one needing to tell them they need to get you the school nurse, and no this is not the time to experiment with treatments. Malleus does so, just because you seemed really adamant, and it’s a good thing. The nurse is nervous with both Lilia and Malleus in the room, but eventually manages to figure out how to take care of you, and even noting that the stuff served in the cafeteria is best for your recovery. Once Lilia knows Malleus has it handled, he leaves. Malleus is doing everything the nurse says, with a little flourish of magic, to make you get better faster. He’s pretty good at reading you as well, so if you move slightly he’s already fluffing your pillow to make it more comfortable, and asking if you’d like more water. He can be very doting normally, and it only increases once you’re sick.

Malleus is going to be relieved, but also not trusting that you’re totally better. Be expecting him to take care of you for a solid week after you’re better, visiting you after classes and bringing you meals, as well as checking your temperature the entire time. It’s not that he doesn’t trust your word, he just doesn’t trust the nurse having the best treatment plan. If he could have it his way, he would’ve brought you to Briar Valley to have one of the doctors there check you over.

Lilia Vanrouge

Lilia had just decided on a whim to visit your dorm the previous night, wanting to see what you were up to. When he found you curled up in bed shaking, clearly still asleep and unaware of your current condition, he decided to just stick around until the morning. After Grim leaves for school, he makes his grand appearance and is asking you what’s wrong. He’s not as concerned as he should be, since he’s seen Silver like this many times and his son has always made a full recovery. Still, he is a little upset to see you in such a state.

He’s not the best, at all, but he kind of knows what to do. He’s taken care of Silver while he’s sick so he assumes he knows what he’s doing…he doesn’t. If you had a fae illness, he'd be perfect. He could treat that almost as well as a normal doctor. A human illness though…well he’s less experienced in that. Still, he’s going to try and do his best before calling the nurse to get whatever medications he needs to hand you. At least he’s willing to call in help once he figures out he doesn’t know how to make you better.

He’s pretty attentive, if not a little teasing while he takes care of you. Again, he knows you’re not dying so he can have a little fun with it. He will try to put some medicine on a spoon and pretend to be a bird as he brings it to your mouth. Show him the most unimpressed look and he’ll break out into a fit of giggles. Just make sure when it comes to meal times, you request being brought something from the cafeteria, letting Lilia know that his seasonings would be too much on your stomach right now. He agrees and brings you proper food, even if he really wants to add something to it.

He’s going to be over the moon when you’re all better, telling you how happy he is and asking if you want to do something fun now. There’s no resting time after being sick, he’s been so good the past few days waiting for you to be better, that now you need to go and do something with him. He’ll be happy if you agree to sit with him in his dorm room and play a few rounds of a video game though. He’s just happy to have you back honestly.

Silver

He’s another one who finds out through Sebek. He’s half asleep when Sebek begins shouting about how you’re missing and Grim is causing havoc and how he won’t stand for it. Silver only hears you’re missing and after asking he finds out you’re sick. He knows just how bad it can be, being sick with nobody to take care of you. Most of the time Lilia didn’t even realize Silver was sick growing up, so he was on his own. This is going to prompt him to go ahead and check in with you.

Silver is actually pretty good at figuring out what to do while you’re sick. Since he normally took care of himself growing up (even if half the time it was sleeping it off) he at least knew the basics. When he noticed you had a fever he was looking for things to help with it, alongside something for your cough and stomach. In no time he had all the things he needed to take care of you, and was able to do it without much of an issue. Good news for you, he is very quiet while he speaks to you, so you don’t need to worry about his presence causing you more of a headache.

He’s not perfect at it, but he tries to keep a good schedule up to make sure you’ll be okay. He can cook you something to eat as well, that tastes pretty okay so he doesn’t need to worry about running to the cafeteria before it closes. For the most part though, you both are asleep. In fact, sometimes you need to nudge him awake to grab your medicine, which he will sleepily do and mumble something about being sorry about falling asleep like that.

He’s relieved to know you’re all better and that he managed to help you, but he’s exhausted afterwards. Let him crash at your place and possibly also check in on him to make sure he didn’t catch whatever you had going on. Once he’s awake he’ll just smile and say he’s grateful you’re feeling better, but he needs to get going since you’re both behind on school work. He doesn’t need anything in return for helping you, but if he ever does get sick it wouldn’t hurt to help him out. He was good to you, so returning that favor is needed…especially since Lilia might not even notice Silver is sick…again.

Sebek Zigvolt

He’s going to notice right away once he sees Grim by himself, doing whatever he wants. He’s going to say the only reason he’s going to check in on you is because the sooner you’re better, the sooner you can control Grim. After all, Grim being crazy can disturb Malleus and cause distractions, and he would be a horrible retainer if he allowed that to happen. Nobody but Lilia and Silver would comment about how he was more fidgety the moment he found out, and how he bit down on his bottom lip, gnawing it with worry for you.

Sadly he’s another one who’s totally hopeless when it comes to taking care of someone else. More or less…it’s a bit disastrous. He’s too loud and causes headaches by accident, and he hasn’t the faintest idea on human illnesses despite being half human himself. Normally when he got sick, nobody knew if it was a fae or human illness, so he was treated for both. Which doesn’t bode well for you since he’s going to use that to try and treat you initially.

Once he realizes his efforts aren’t making you better, he’s going to call Silver to help out. He doesn't want to bother Lilia for something like this, and Silver is the only human he likes other than you. Thankfully Silver explains what to do and Sebek will do so, but stumbles a bit. At least you’ll slowly be getting better, and he’s not an idiot and will make sure you’re eating good food. He’s determined to make you better, and eventually he forgets all about the horrible excuse he told others, letting his worry take over for you. After letting him know his voice is a bit too loud, he’s going to quiet down for you.

He’s relieved to know you’re better and for a while he’s significantly less tense, and everyone notices. Lilia is going to be teasing him about it, making poor Sebek go bright red since he’s been outed for caring about a lowly human. When you thank him, he’ll go back to the lie he told everyone else about wanting Grim to be properly handled, but the red on his cheeks is persistent enough to let you know that it’s a horribly fabricated lie…though you would’ve been able to tell either way.

#Twisted Wonderland #Twisted Wonderland x Reader #TWST #TWST x Reader #TWST Wonderland #Twisted Wonderland Disney #TWST Disney #Malleus Draconia #Malleus Draconia x Reader #Malleus x Reader #Lilia Vanrouge #Lilia Vanrouge x Reader #Lilia x Reader #Silver x Reader #TWST Silver #Twisted Wonderland Silver #Sebek Zigvolt #Sebek Zigvolt x Reader #Sebek x Reader

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copperbadge · 14 days

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Lately, it's felt like every time I've started to work on writing, I'll just be getting into the rhythm of it when I get interrupted, either by work or the cats or because the time I'd booked in the library study room is up (you can only do two hours at a time, and only four hours a week total). It was getting to the point where I kept re-reading the same chapter or so of previous work but never managing to add to it.

So I tried an experiment this past weekend -- I found a really cheap rate on a local hotel room, and on Friday I took an overnight bag and a very old laptop with limited processing power and checked into a room about a mile from home for a quasi "staycation". I unpacked and had a quiet night on Friday, as prelude to working Saturday-Sunday. The idea was to write uninterrupted by other people, pets, the presence of all my Stuff around me at home, et cetera.

I had snacks but I also bought meals out, which was nice; I don't often order in or buy out when I'm at home. The way I set up was that I would do fifty minutes of writing with do-not-disturb engaged on my phone and then ten minutes of checking email, texts, etc. since often what pulls me out of writing is a text or an email that needs answering, or the anxiety that I'm missing one that would. If I set it so that every hour I check, well, nobody's going to die if something doesn't get answered in an hour, so the anxiety isn't there, and neither is the distraction. (I found a nice app for this, review later depending on how functional it continues to be for me, but it's a like $4 app called Forest.)

It worked pretty well -- writing for an uninterrupted hour, as long as I know what I'm working on, is very functional for me. I average about two thousand words, that way, though there is a limit to the number of hours I can put in. I ended up doing two hours in the morning and one hour in the afternoon, then switched from fiction writing to clearing out my tumblr drafts and some correspondence for the fourth hour. So it went something like

Go out and get breakfast, bring back and eat in room

Change into lounging clothes and do two one-hour sessions

Go out and get lunch, eat lunch out

Bit of a rest break back in the room

Two one-hour sessions, one of writing; when tired, switch to something that requires less creativity

Go out and get dinner, bring back and eat in room

And then in the evening the plan was to watch movies or catch up on reading, but I ended up being mentally weary, so instead I did some simple tarot reading. It was less divination or even meditation than just messing around, keeping the creativity stimulated; I did a couple of Creative Writing spreads, some very brief divination spreads (I nicked a nice three-card spread here that I mentally call He To Hecuba, and just used it in general rather than for a specific question) and then invented a spread when I was starting to get irritated that the same like, five cards kept coming up, more on this in its own post.

Sunday I did one more writing session but it was less successful, I think partly because what I was writing required a lot of research and partly because the previous day I'd dumped eight thousand words into the file. (Research took longer because I brought the most garbage laptop known to man, and the browsers crash if you try to open Google Maps, but in other ways it was ideal since there wasn't much I could do on it other than write.) But I had a good breakfast, got some rest, packed up easily enough, and headed home just ahead of the rain storm.

I don't think it's something I'll be able to do in that format especially often, since the deal I got on the hotel was an anomaly and Chicago lodging, even just AirBNB stuff, is stupid expensive. But in addition to helping get some work done it was a nice break, so I'm going to look into ways I could swing it on a perhaps monthly basis, or some other way to cheaply spend an entire day alone with decent access to a bathroom/snacks and a way to come and go easily. I've looked into coworking spaces before but they tend to be prohibitively expensive and don't really have the setup I'd prefer; there's a hostel on the north side with private rooms that I might try out but it doesn't seem significantly cheaper than a hotel. I might just have to pick one weekend a month and watch last-minute hotel price cuts where they simply want to fill a room for a day or two.

Anyway, functionally I wrote almost a fifth of a novel this weekend, and one that I wasn't feeling super on fire about; I'm feeling much better about it now that I've got some established plot going and I feel like I "know" the newer characters a bit better. (Also I'm enjoying writing Simon as someone who is absolutely entranced by his love interest and clueless that what he's feeling isn't mild antipathy because they met while fighting over ricotta.) So it was a big help, although if I were to put a budget line item in the Extribulum Press ledger for "writing staycation" it would wipe out my royalties surplus very quickly.

#writing #shivadhverse

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twst-drabbles · 8 days

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Malleus 16

Summary: Class has ended and you’re ready to eat for lunch, but everyone has stopped at the door. Turns out Malleus was there, and he craves affection.

(Wanted to write about kisses. And then Malleus popped into my head. So here you go!)

“Um, hey, Prefect?” Oh, well would you look at that, it’s Deuce speaking up this time, “Can I… copy your notes again? Please?”

“Yeah, I really couldn’t pay attention,” Grim tapped his paws on your desk, like that’ll somehow endear you to him, “besides, the board is so far away.”

You and your group are two seats away from said board.

“Yeah, come on,” Ace laid an arm across the back of your seat, “do us a solid, yeah? You know you want to. Can’t resist the call of enlightening our tiny little brains.”

“What are you gonna give me?” You closed your notebook just so Ace and Deuce don’t have a chance to look at your notes. “I’ve been saving your asses for the past two weeks. You gotta give me something.”

“Hehe, that’s my minion! If you want a fast pass, you need to give us reparations in tuna!” He cheered, once more using ‘we’ as soon as he thinks he’s getting something.

“You have to pay too, Cat.”

There will be no ‘we’ this time.

“What?! Why?!”

You tried tutoring them in the past but having Ace, Deuce and Grim all in the same room for more than ten minutes always leads to either an argument breaking out, a bunch of whining, or just general chaos because one or more people tried to slip out of trouble.

Yeah, yeah it’s partially your fault for losing patience and just giving up on them, but you’d think they’d at least pay attention long enough to take notes.

They’re right there! On the board!

They have no excuse and they have to at least pay you back for this emotional trouble.

Was this petty? Yes, very. You don’t care right now. You want a treat. Or money. Or both!

“Huh, ah, well,” Deuce got sheepish and reached into his pockets, “I have gum.”

“No.” He has disappointed you. An unworthy treat for your notes.

“How about I only eat three-fourths of your food this time?” Suggested Grim.

“My treat is me giving you more of my food?” And you don’t even give it, he just steals it!

Grim hissed. He was probably hoping you didn’t know fractions. But, good on him for finally learning. Shame his first thought was to try and trick you with it.

“Okay guys, you all know that’s not what the Prefect really wants,” Ace leans in, acting chummy, “how about this?”

You were given one thaumark.

“…”

“Alright listen, I need the rest to buy other things, okay?”

You got up after calmly putting your notes away. “I’m going to get lunch.”

“No wait come back!”

But, as much as you wanted to walk out and sit at the regular table while your friends slowly fill in the seats, the exit to the classroom was blocked by a cluster of murmuring and rather nervous students.

“What’s he doing here?” You heard one whisper.

“Uh, did we do something? Were we too loud?”

“I’m really hungry but…”

You are not in the mood. You tried to excuse yourself as you bumped into shoulders but you had to settle for grumbled apologies instead as you shoved yourself through.

Finally, you popped out of the other side, a little more heated and more irritable.

“There you are, Child of Man,” so goes the voice of Malleus, who stood to the side of the door, waiting. The cause of this blockage, students frozen with only his green-eyed stare. “I was kept waiting quite a while. How bold of you to do this, after the slight you made this morning.”

What?

“Wha?” Your annoyance was momentarily replaced by bafflement, but that quickly went away when your brain caught up to his words. You grumbled, “Oh, come on…”

Yeah, you’re probably not even gonna eat at the cafeteria. You’re just gonna get your food and go hide away somewhere until you cooled down.

Malleus walked forward, the surge of students all taking a collective step back as though his very air could potentially kill them.

“Well? Don’t you remember?” He crossed his arms and you were ready for that high-brow glare that comes with all people of royalty, but instead, you found an exaggerated and childish pout. “You forgot to give me my morning greeting. I felt off the entire morning, unable to focus, because I didn’t have the memory of you kissing my brow fresh in my mind.”

A hush fell over the classroom.

And then a, “Huh?!” shot out of Ace’s mouth.

You snorted, then gave out a hearty chuckle. Once you calmed down, you waved Malleus over.

“Alright, alright, get over here. Let me correct that.”

A laugh rumbled low in his throat as he tilted his head into your hand. Playfully, you lightly pinched his ear, just because his pointy ears always caught your attention. He twitched, breath hitching just the slightest bit, and you couldn’t resist the urge anymore and kissed above his brow.

Malleus’s lashes fluttered open and the sigh that escaped him reminded you of a pure-hearted maiden with a fast-beating heart. And yet, there’s nothing delicate about the way he stood. If anything, the affection flowing through him made his pride more apparent. He practically glowed with that royal grace he was taught to have.

You couldn’t help yourself. You gave him an extra kiss on the corner of his lips. Malleus nearly hissed in a breath as he clamped his hand over your own, his body leaning in closer towards yours, as though he wanted to meld with you.

But, with a chuckle, you pulled away and he had no choice but to let go. Malleus was back to pouting, though this time, cheeks flushed and hair slightly messier than usual. The air around you was slightly charged with wayward magic, causing the hair on your body to stand on end. And his eyes…

Well, whoops.

“Good morning. I’ll see you later, okay?”

Better get out of here before Malleus jumps you right in this hallway.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst-drabbles #twst-drabbles exclusive #drabble #diasomnia #malleus #malleus draconia #reader insert

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