#i am giving people the benefit of the doubt and just assuming they never watched hxh

[mari-lair]

A friend told mitsukou won agaist killugon in a poll and i have never been more dissapointed in twitter in my life. And that site dissapoint me on the daily.

#i am giving people the benefit of the doubt and just assuming they never watched hxh #cause holy shit #i may just have to go back to my roots and draw them

[edenfenixblogs]

Thank Your Jewish Friends Trying to Educate You Right Now

If you’re a leftist, and you have had a Jewish friend reach out to you to try and tell you that you’ve said something alarming or harmful or antisemitic: listen to them, learn, and say thank you.

I am VERY lucky in that all the friends I’ve personally reached out to have taken the opportunity to learn and grow and adjust their behavior. I have never told them that they should not advocate for Palestine. I have told them I want to advocate for Palestine WITH them, but I need to feel safe in order to do so. I need to feel like the people I’m advocating with don’t want me and my loved ones dead. Thank HaShem that they have listened to me. From the bottom of my heart, my friends are a blessing.

But I’ve seen an incredibly disheartening number of fellow Jews who have had the opposite experiences—being expelled from their queer communities and activist communities and book clubs and any space they once found community. This is horrid but it’s especially horrid for Jews. It’s a reminder that we are only accepted if we conform. We are only accepted if we accept abuse. Our presence is always tolerated, never wanted. Our views are not to be trusted. Our opinions are always suspect. Our motives are always sinister. Our acceptance is always conditional. And I think that hurts even more for us than you’d imagine, because our own spaces are no longer safe. We are already in diaspora. And now our synagogues and homes and other community buildings are being vandalized and attack. We are cut off from our own cultural community and now many of us are being cut off from our personal communities as well. It is a loneliness that most people outside of a diaspora will never know.

Im willing to bet that if you have/had a Jewish friend who you considered close but who seems to have disappeared from your life, it’s because you either didn’t reach out to them after 10/7 or you have failed to acknowledge the stochastic threat to Jews or the Jewish connection to Israel. Why is it important that you do this? Because we are your friends and loved ones. And when friends and loved ones tell you they are hurting, you should listen. When you say you care about someone, you should be willing to listen to them when they say you’re hurting them and then you should apologize. It is more hurtful than you can possibly imagine to watch people you thought cared about you decide to listen to people across the world who they have never met rather than simply have a conversation with a friend, because they assume that friend will dismiss the pain of Palestinians.

Many of you are assuming what your friends are feeling about Israel and Palestine, but you haven’t actually asked them. Many of you think that expressing sorrow for Israel or jews in the world, that means we cannot care about or want a better future for Palestine.

If you are lucky enough to have a friend who has tried to reach out to you, that means they are willing to forgive you for neglecting them in this time. They are willing to talk with you and try to explain their emotions in good faith. They want to find a way to advocate for progress with you. They want to keep you in their lives. They want you to understand our culture and history—not at the exclusion of anyone else’s culture and history—just at the inclusion of our own.

Because here’s the other thing: they won’t forget that you denied them understanding and respect and the benefit of the doubt. That’s not a threat. That’s a cultural feature of Judaism. We have famously long cultural memories. We remember the people and places we can trust and those who refused to give us peace and safety and basic kindness. We remember the people who targeted us, your friends and loved ones, simply because other Jews who we have never met behaved in ways you don’t understand and of which you don’t approve. You are blaming the sins of others on people you claim to love.

If someone is giving you the chance to undo the damage you have done on this, you should take it. And if you have expelled Jews from a space you once shared or failed to acknowledge their pain in this time—find them and apologize.

I am not Muslim, but I wouldn’t doubt that something similar is happening in Muslim spaces. Islamophobia and antisemitism are at terrifyingly high levels right now. And if you think you can’t support Jews without condemning Muslims or you can’t support Muslims without condemning Jews, you’re not only part of the problem—you’re the biggest part of the problem.

What we all need right now is unity, peace, solidarity, understanding, and education above all else.

#jumblr #antisemitism #leftist antisemitism #islamophobia #jewish muslim solidarity

[rutadales]

So instead of sending an ask clearing up misinformation on these tags bc that would be pointless and serve to only make people upset, instead I am going to illustrate to all of you how short, quippy, and wrong statements completely control the conversation. Any attempt to clear up misinfo is going to take twice as long and be a lot less clipable (tbc this person isn't doing this intentionally doing this (at least to my knowledge) but it goes to show how pervasive these quick and wrong statements are). Watch:

"dream gave gumball's va alcohol" completely wrong, dream and gumball here both went to a birthday party of a mutual friend and met 20 minutes prior to the interaction in the Uber. There's nothing to show that Dream even brought alcohol to the event, let alone saught out a 20 year old to give it to him.

"VA is underage" technically correct in the specific context of America's legal drinking age, but so misleading it feels intentional. For most people underage means below 18, a minor, and not a 20 year old adult making the decsion to drink a year before it's legal. Any reasonable person is going to assume 17 or younger here.

"VA had a bipolar swing" There's nothing to suggest this besides people decided it. You can't diagnose a manic episode from a 4 minute clip and the majority of you are not capable of diagnosing anytime at all. No one has confirmed this, not even gold statue Michaelangelo (who by the way has deleted every tweet involving the situation). But even in the scenario where he is manic in those clips, being manic is not a free pass to verbal harass minimum wage workers and be freely antisemitic, ablest, and homophobic. But I digress.

"and called Dream a faggot" yeah that parts true

Even more additional context that is relevant is Dream was physically assaulted by Gumball's VA. Gumball's VA directly asked if Dream was Jewish after saying Dream would never get rid of his money, called the Uber driver the r slur and said the Uber driver had down syndrome. He then threatened to kill or paralyze Dream.

See how long that took? Almost 400 words to counter 4 lines. And I'm giving the original commentor the benefit of the doubt here and assuming they're just repeating what they heard but you see how that's dangerous? You see how this method of controlling interactions keeps the flow on the side of the person who is factually wrong?

And I didn't even get into how this is a tactic of the alt right, how it serves to normalize using faggot as a weapon, how it actively desensitizes people to bigotry if the person on the receiving end "deserves it". Or how harmful instantly trying to make the assaulter in this situation the victim, or using mental illness as an excuse to assault and threaten to kill people is also bad! Because even though that is all true and absolutely necessary in this conversation, I can't get into it! Because it would take even longer and "I ain't reading all that" is the most annoying, damaging phrase on twitter right now.

#discourse #neg #YOU SEE THE PROBLEM HERE. #And now imagine the back and forth the goalpost shifting the backtracking the contradictions #all of which would require the same length of responses to debunk and deconstruct #and would get us nowhere.

[trans-luis-serra-navarro]

Hii!!!

Thank you so much for tagging me before, I hope this isn't too late (?) Days are hectic for me but nonetheless, I would very much like to touch up on your tips and advice you have when writing for Luis. I loved him in the remake, and I would very much love to do him justice in some form of written work!

Thank you for reaching out, this really helps me!!

<3

HIHIHI ITS NOT A PROBLEM AT ALL!!!!! And don’t worry it’s NEVER too late!!! I have stuff sitting in my inbox from like. December HCNEHNDJDJJXNS

I Must admit I’m not really an expert nor am I much of a profession fanfic writer or anything- I only do it for fun!!!! So if you want something like, more specific PLEASE pretty please feel free to ask I’d be more than happy to help!!!! But in terms of general tips and tricks??? Here’s a few that I have under the cut!!!

As weird as this is gonna sound a lot of time I’ll just go and watch Luis’ voice actor André Peña’s streams on Twitch to try and pick up on lil mannerisms or speech quirks that get shown in-game!!!! If I can find an example I’ll put it here, but just generally picking up on what Luis would theoretically sound like if he were talking in a casual conversation helps me out!!!!! (Also he’s just in general a very lovely guy and his twitch streams are always fun so I reccomended them if you’re able to catch one!!!)

On a similar note, if you’re watching any cutscenes and any small characteristic sticks out to you- use that to your advantage!!!! I’ve always noticed how he kinda smiles differently when in different situations/levels of stress/talking to different people so I use that to my advantage when writing scenes with him!!!!

OR OR EVEN, if you’re able to and have the time, go look at older livestreams where the cast talk about their roles in RE4R and see what André has to say about Luis!!!!!! I’m more than happy to link the streams once I can find them again if you want!!!!!!!!! Seeing the actors be so genuine and passionate about the characters and putting their whole selves into the role truly does make them feel just so,,,, h u m a n <<<<33

Also, I know everyone and their mother says this, but research truly does help!!!!! There’s a LOT of things people miss about his character if you only view him on a surface-level or go into his character assuming he’s just a cardboard cutout ‘bad-guy-turned-good’ Typa character, so reading analysis posts on him to get a better idea of why he does what he does and how he is as a person will really help!!!! (Obviously I’ve got my own posts under the tag #luisposting or #othersposts, but the lovely @blveherb has some amazing posts of their own I can’t recommend enough!!!!)

There’s a LOOOOOOT of just. Very incorrect misinformation out there HXNSUSJ (staring at you resident evil fan wiki. Staring at you. VERY HARD) so if you ever come across a post that seems to only lean towards a negative view of Luis as a character or never gives him the benefit of the doubt,,,, it most likely won’t have been made with good taste in mind or properly researched HCNEHENDUDJ

Also also also, looking for things that he was directly inspired by!!!!!! I C A N N O T make this post without mentioning the 1957 Don Quixote film- it’s free on YouTube and it is SOOOOOO SOSOSOSOSOSOSO GOOD!!!!! Capcom TRULY put their all into the Don Quixote symbolism in his character and if you’re able to get your hands on a copy of the book, it’s well worth the read!!!

AGAIN on a similar note- looking at his culture and history is SOOOOOOOO important!!!! For example, the beginning of Seperate Ways features Luis doing a style of Flamenco called ‘Seguiriyas’- and once I’m awake in the morning and fully able to navigate the horror of the tumblr tagging system I’ll look for a post that goes deeper into this HCNEHWNEUDJDIS but Indigenous and Spanish culture are full of such rich and beautiful history you can pull from it is SO worth taking a look!!! Not to mention, you can play around with the fact that Luis was raised pretty Hardcore Catholic or the fact that it’s implied his Grandfather fought in/would have survived the Spanish Civil war as concepts a ton!!!

And if you’re writing specifically for Serennedy, taking a look at the Queer history of Spain/Europe as a whole is DEFINITELY worth your time!!!!! Looking back and remembering the people who came before us is always important and lends a hand to how we perceive our own funny lil fictional guys BCBEHENEJDNXJ

That being said, I only ever see this with writers who already have bigoted views and you seem like literally the nicest person EVERRRRRR so this TOTALLY isn’t directed at you!!!!!! But it’s super important not to fall into just straight-up racist stereotypes- calling Luis a predator, saying he’s a sex-driven animal, generally referring to him as ‘dirty’ etc is stuff that unfortunately you don’t JUST see with Luis but with many other POC characters too (like Carlos for example- he gets the brunt of it a LOT) so when you see stuff like this, don’t be afraid to call it out!!!!!!

I HOPE THIS LONG ASS POST DIDNT SCARE YOU OFF OR ANYTHING AHDNWHENXUDNXIX I TRIED MY BEST TO COVER ALL OF MY BASES CUZ I WASNT SURE WHAT KIND OF TIPS YOU WANTED!!!!!!!!! Again if you want something more specific feel free to ask!!!!!!!!

#I’m soooooooooo normal this post was so totally normal on normal levels of normal #asks #luisposting

[doll-elvis]

What does Reeca Smith look like? I tried looking up photos but nothing seems to come up..

I got a few asks about Reeca Smith so I thought I would combine them here <3, thank you guys for the questions !!

As for the first ask: sorry some of these are aren’t the best quality 😩 but all these pictures of Reeca in 1974 were taken from the documentary “Elvis: Heartbreaker” also called “Elvis’ Women” or “Loving Elvis” depending on the country where you are streaming it

Reeca is on the right in this group photo

And this is Reeca pictured with the Trans Am that Elvis purchased for her ⬇️

If you’re in the North America and unable to watch the documentary, here is a tutorial that I posted awhile back, it still works and I use this method myself !! ⬇️

Second ask: As for any intimacy, this is all that Reeca has said on the subject ⬇️

Since she didn't mention kissing or any other form of intimacy in her most recent interview, I'm assuming it wasn't something that played a major role in their relationship. She has stated that Elvis and her would mostly just talk, and that he especially enjoyed just reading the Bible to her. I think Reeca’s dynamic with Elvis was exactly the same as girls like Heidi, Frances, Gloria and Arlene. All of those girls have only ever talked about Elvis in high regards, and I think that really does speak volumes

However, although these girls don’t see themselves as victims, and while I do truly believe that Elvis never took advantage of them, it still doesn’t justify the kissing. Like you said this is obviously a very hard pill to swallow for any Elvis fan but it personally helps me to try to understand Elvis’ intentions and his mindset when he involved himself with those girls. And so when they all say that it was very innocent, I believe them, and I can honestly say without a doubt, that I think Elvis had good/pure intentions and that the situation wasn’t as black and white as some people try to make it seem

As for the third ask: In terms of Reeca overstating her importance, that very well could be possible, but to give her the benefit of the doubt, Elvis invited a lot of people on tour 😩 and they weren’t always girls that he was dating, for example Jeanne Lemay Dumas who was Linda’s friend and the Alden sisters (Ginger’s family)

If she was invited by Elvis like she says, that doesn‘t mean that Reeca would have been his main girl or anything like that on the tour, it’s likely that he still would have had either Sheila or Linda with him as his girlfriend. Also Reeca was good friends with Ricky Stanley who accompanied Elvis on tours, so that could have been another factor

Infact the very first day that Reeca hanged out with Elvis, Linda, Ricky and David Stanley accompanied them. And in that amazon documentary Linda acknowledged Reeca and also referred to her as one of Elvis’ “dalliances”, so she was at least aware of Reeca’s friendship/relationship with Elvis

** also I saw you mentioned Elvis possibly dating Maggie Smith and I got another ask about her that I am currently researching for (desperately trying to find a copy of this book written about her 😩) and so hopefully I will have more info on her by then

quote from Maggie (Magnolia) Smith 💗

but just from the little research I have done so far, it’s looking like it’s unlikely that they ever dated. Maggie Smith herself hasn’t said that she dated him, Marty Lacker said she was someone Elvis felt sorry for and therefore given a job, and Nurse Tish and Mary Jenkins also only referred to her as one of the maids/employees. Only Nancy Rooks has said that she dated Elvis so I’m still trying to figure out who is telling the truth 😭 like why would Nancy just make that up?

As for Elvis possibly wanting to pursue a serious relationship with Reeca, I don’t think he meant to do so until she was much older

Reeca said this about Elvis wanting a possible future with her ➡️ “He said ‘I know you’re are young but when you’re older, maybe in a couple years, maybe we can go places and have more of a relationship’”

I don’t believe their relationship ever became “serious”, especially since Reeca has never said that they formally dated. He only saw her September and November of 1974, and then for the last time in January of 1975. He was probably preoccupied with Sheila Ryan, Linda Thompson and Ann Pennington etc etc 🤧

I hope this helps anyone who wanted to know more about Reeca, I would love to hear what you guys think, or if you have any info yourself on Reeca or Maggie that you want to share 💗!!

#elvis presley #elvisaaronpresley #elvis #elvis history #elvis documentary #elvis fans #elvis asks #reeca smith #maggie smith

[butwhatifidothis]

bl stans are sooo much stronger than me bc if someone said something so blatantly and heinously wrong about my faves like this i’d snap. like i’m so serious this would send me straight into my joker arc

(guess you accidentally put it in twice lol rip)

I'm not gonna address any kind of defense for Not Just Kills But Murders OP, we all know that the original tweet was silly. The fastest way to spot a clown is the funny clown nose and wig, but another, more subtle way is to watch if they've ever tried to make NJKBM anything but the accidental joke that it is.

But I kinda wanna actually talk about the Fleche one a bit, because there is such a weird amount of going-to-bat for her and Randolph that's actually kinda baffling.

Fleche and Randolph are bit characters. They barely even are characters. They are devices the writers put into the story so that specifically AM and specifically Dimitri benefit from what they give, which is a solidification of the message that letting vengeance be your one driving force will lead to your end. They are completely irrelevant to all other parts of the game, with Fleche even being completely absent in half of the routes save for one mention of her name as Randolph is literally dying. She loved Randolph so much that she was willing to kill Dimitri to avenge him, but apparently not enough to kill Seteth or Claude for doing literally the same thing.

Except, hey, wait a hingly-dingly minute there, that's not right. Seteth and Claude can only potentially be the ones to kill Randolph in their respective routes, while Dimitri is literally the only one hard-confirmed to not be the one to kill Randolph. Byleth does. They kill him. But Fleche still singles out Dimitri as to one to kill him - not threaten to torture like is the case, but to kill him outright. She calls Dimitri a monster, she hates Dimitri with all she has, she'll never forgive Dimitri, while not giving a single shit about Byleth despite them being the one to kill Randolph. She doesn't give a single shit about the multitude of other people that could have potentially killed Randolph in SS or VW.

Hell, it's not even clear how she knew about Randolph's death, only that she knew that a "monster" (aka Dimitri) was in the ranks of the army in AM, so it looks like she kinda just assumes "the monster" killed her brother without having any actual knowledge on who did what. And even giving the benefit of the doubt in that "well Dimitri MADE Byleth kill Randolph so same difference," that still doesn't explain Fleche's radio silence in the other two routes this can happen in. And still doesn't actually explain why Byleth wouldn't just be lumped in the vengeance quest for, like, still being the one to actually kill her brother outright?

Because we as players aren't meant to really care that much about her - she and Randolph are given no point in the story other than showing off to Dimitri why his quest for revenge is Cringe And Not Based like he thinks it is. They are literally meant to show off why Dimitri's misguided quest for vengeance is dangerous and unfulfilling, which is why when Fleche stabs and kills Rodrigue Dimitri comes to his senses and rejects vengeance as a motivation. That is all Fleche and Randolph do.

(we ignore the "Edelgard did nothing to Dimitri" lie - because at this point they've got to just be outright lying to cope - we know it's not true and we move on from it)

They are given no focus whatsoever on any other route because it is AM where their one, singular purpose is found. Even on CF, the route where you can actually talk to them, at best Randolph is given one cutscene where he dies and makes Edelgard Sadge before she immediately gets over it and moves on never to mention or think about Randolph ever again. And Fleche does literally nothing - she just stands there for the rest of the game as a lump on a log. So seeing multiple people saying "Fleche wasn't allowed vengeance when Dimitri was!" when Dimitri literally isn't allowed vengeance and always dies should he continue to strive for it is just weird. They're, again, trying to go to bat for two bit characters that are solely meant to encapsulate the opposite of what the batters are saying lmao

#ask #anti edelgard #anti-edelgard #edelgard discourse #edelgard critical #just to be safe #and this is all ignoring that Randolph was literally trying to kill Dimitri and his men/friends first. for clout. #and how he attacked a building that housed defenseless people in it five years prior to that. for clout. #so it's literally not that fuckin' boo hoo sad that he dies because he is a giant dick who has no qualms killing/endangering innocent people #for clout.

[tseecka]

I feel a little bad saying this because I know how much it means to a lot of people but I am... not upset about the cancellation of OFMD.

In my opinion, S2 was rushed and messy. Characters didn't so much develop as change on a dime. None of the journeys of self-discovery, love, and meaning felt earned; they felt smashed together in a disjointed montage that lasted the whole season, an exercise in getting from Point A to Point B in as little time as possible.

(Respect where deserved to Izzy, the only exception to this from my view.)

Not only was everything rushed and messy but it also seemed to lose touch with the heart of the show and of its characters. I didn't recognize any of them anymore; they all felt like strangers. Poignant and meaningful themes from S1 were completely absent, overshadowed by dumb gags that were just dumb, with no added depth or wit to them. Characters I loved from S1 actively gave me the ick and made me uncomfortable in S2. (And that's not even to mention new characters introduced in S2--not Auntie and Zhang, they were actually the best part of the season--but if I were to ever watch S2 again I would actively skip the episode with Anne and Mary. That was awful and toxic and uncomfortable and, in the absence of any other wlw relationships on the show, made the whole thing feel like one big anti-sapphic microaggression.)

Maybe it's fandom's fault; maybe the depth and breadth of creativity and analysis that we subsisted on between the end of S1 and the launch of S2 was the kind of perfect storm that a small team of insulated writers could never hope to live up to (I am reminded of the Reichenbach theories from Sherlock days, and Moffat's glaring ineptitude at delivering a satisfying explanation that followed). That's no one's fault.

But I remember telling my wife when we watched it: "This feels like DJ was worried about not getting a S3, so he smashed everything he wanted to do into too few episodes rather than leave the story without an ending if renewal didn't happen". The story had an ending; a decently clean and satisfying one, all things considered, and I am genuinely content with where everyone ended up even if I remain baffled at how the show wants us to understand they got there. So in a way, this news kind of feels like a self fulfilling prophecy.

It feels like the creators didn't believe in the show--and honestly, their audience--enough to stick to their guns and tell it the way it deserved to be told, and trust that it and we would continue to stand on its own merits. They rushed it to a "good enough" ending, just in case. And then Max looked took that ending at face value and said, "Thanks for the ending! You're done now."

I'm giving a decent amount of benefit of the doubt, here. It's entirely possible that the story got told exactly how they wanted it to (in which case it wasn't a victim of fear in the current creative climate--it was just bad, and the cancellation was ENTIRELY deserved). But: assuming that isn't the case. Idk. it's a story about pirates, which themselves have long been a narrative symbol in fiction for standing up against the the demands and rules and norms of society, for daring to strike out on your own path, rules and consequences both be damned. S2 didn't do that. They played it safe, took the King's Writ and gold and turned to privateering instead (to continue the metaphor), and so...I think its death is fitting.

(I'm purposefully not tagging this with the fandom tag, because I don't want people to come across this in the tag while they're mourning a show they care about, but if it somehow shows up in the tag anyways because of my other tags below please give me a heads up so I can adjust.)

#idk i see all this mourning on my dash for ofmd and i just keep thinking #s2 was Not Good you guys #that doesnt mean you have to dislike it! or even that you should! #but being queer and about pirates is not enough to justify making mediocre tv #s1 was perfect and beautiful and s2 wont take that from me #but i actually dont think theres a big homophobic conspiracy at max--or at least thats not the reason #i think s2 just kind of sucked 😕

[moonsquaremars]

Why can’t I fix him?

Why is my love not enough? He had feelings for me. That is unarguable. his borderline personality disorder must have kicked in. maybe he was scared, felt unloveable. scared i would abandon him. so he self sabotaged cuz that was the safer bet for him.

but didn’t he see how understanding i was? how much i wanted to take care of him? didn’t he see the stars in my eyes, the expression of pure happiness just lying next to him?

maybe he got greedy. maybe he didn’t want to be tied down. saw how happy i made him, and figured he could do better. get more. have more sex with others. maybe i made him feel too attractive and desirable.

his hypocrisy. watching my grindr usage. sending me snarky remarks on a burner account. replying “who else” when i told him i loved him. i would have pushed every one to the side for him. i mean that. whenever i used the same tricks he used on me, it became an issue.

& he never said i love you back. started calling me codependent. he’s probably right there, but it takes two to tango.

the fact he has a history of this. dating violence. always preying on skinny young twinks with “daddy issues”. who doesn’t have daddy issues. it’s really not fair to reduce love and sexual attraction to that. it is what it is. not one person has a perfect relationship with both their parents. what is the use in trying to distort the pure love and happiness he provided me.

you told me you didn’t ask for another chance. you didn’t ask for me to give you the benefit of the doubt. harsh, true. am i a fool for giving it to you?

i won’t be a fool for letting you get away with this. the people of your past may not have held you accountable with the law. but i will. im not letting you push me around. break my phone and my heart, and walk away feeling like top dog who can do and have whatever he wants.

you had me big guy. and i had you. those seven weeks feel like a dream that i never want to wake up from. we could have built a life. i wanted so desperately to build a life with you.

you asked how i would kill you when we were joking around about that stuff. i said i wouldn’t, because i wanted to live with you. live.

that answer surprised even me. im dark, twisted. have a cruel sense of humor at times. but i don’t act on those thoughts. i can resist those impulses. i don’t want that for my life. i guess you’re not the same in that regard.

i believe everyone is a good person. turns out people aren’t as simple as that. there is part of you that is good. but that part hid away, and someone new is now in your body. i don’t know if it’s from your drug use, or bpd. i don’t know what it is.

it really doesn’t matter to me anymore, since we’ll never ever be together anymore. and that is what im mad about most. the fact you’re probably one of the most handsome men i’ve ever seen. the list goes on the ways you turned me on.

we were such a good match. but now it’s over. and you ruined all chances of there being something more. and that’s what makes me want to hate you. i wish i could hate you.

my error was thinking you wanted better for yourself. my error was assuming we had similar goals and outlooks on life. in many ways we did. and the fact you were such an asshole kinda turned me on. but you’re vicious and cruel, even to someone who loves you.

i don’t know what went wrong to make you this way. i wish i knew. i wish i could change it. i wish i could go back in time, and prevent whatever happened to make you this way.

you were my dream. and now you’re my nightmare. and i hate the idea that now i’m gonna have to spend my life with somebody else. if i survive you. and that we didn’t get enough time together.

#codependant #i guess #recovering codependent

[airic-fenn]

Only If You Think I Am.

Sometimes I remember the temp employee at my old high school job who offered to buy me lunch since I forgot my wallet, and then asked immediately after we sat down if I was mixed. I mean, he was right, but it was a very uncomfortable first question to be asked by a complete stranger.

But it was also one of the many instances that gets me thinking about how weird it is to be mixed race and also racially ambiguous.

Whether or not I’m perceived as a person of color depends entirely upon who is doing the perceiving, and even when and where in the world they’re doing it. Am I in the southern US, or Colorado? Am I in Europe? Is it summertime and I’ve developed a tan, or is it the dead of winter?

Some people dont bat an eye, other people look at me curiously, knowing I am something but they’re just not quite sure what.

One curious man jumped to the proud assumption I must be Turkish, instead of letting me finish explaining that my mom was only born there because her dad was stationed there once.

In France at New Years, my penpal’s friend made a joke about slavery, then laughed and assumed that if I was offended, its because I’m White.

And all of my experiences like these leave me wondering, where do I put myself?

A friend once admitted to me that in middle school when we were covering slavery in class, he had watched me closely to see my reactions to it, because at the time I was just about the most diverse that school got.

The funny part is back then I was barely aware of being mixed race, other than that my Opa is Black. I was just me, and that was just how my family was.

I didn’t really have Black friends growing up (re: very un-diverse schools and neighborhood). Though, my mom would tell stories about how as a kid, she’d get teased and called an “oreo cookie” and blatant questions from her cousins like “what are you?” She’d mention how she would code switch with them, and try to act extra Black with them because otherwise she wasnt Black enough.

But she didn’t talk about race, or how any of it might apply to me. She stuck with the facts: I was mixed. And that was it.

And so I grew up with little understanding of what that meant until I reached high school. I was sheltered, oblivious, surrounded almost entirely by Whiteness and barely aware that people might, sometimes, treat me differently.

That temp worker back at that job of mine was the first time I had considered that people might.

But because I am caught in this limbo, I will never know for sure. Unless they say it out loud, I am left to wonder whether someone is just being angry and rude, or if they’re pulling a racism.

Generally, I give the benefit of the doubt. And why shouldn’t I, when I often barely know for sure how to perceive myself? I’m just me.

Race feels like a concept thrust upon me. Am I

☑️ White/Caucasian?

Or

☑️ Black/African American?

If I’m given the option, I’ll fill in “Other.” But I’m rarely given the option to fill in both.

The problem with being asked to respond with one or the other is that singularly neither feels right. I’d be lying.

I know a lot of mixed folks identify with being Black. I’m not sure I can no, I’m not sure I’m allowed to, even if I probably, maybe could. Because I get caught up in my own questions and fears of “am I Black enough?”

“What even makes someone Black?”

“Sure, the color of your skin, but its also a culture, its experiences.”

“But isnt it reductive to reduce a person’s identity down to whether they’ve been marginalized?”

“Even if I identified as Black, wouldnt that be perpetuating old racist concepts like the one drop rule?” (And if I think long and hard enough about that, I inevitably fall down the rabbit hole and start thinking about how if I couldn’t or wouldn’t consider myself indigenous despite my great-grandmother, why is it acceptable to identify as Black? Even though, technically, I understand the messed up history of why of both).

I’m never able to answer these questions.

But at the same time, identifying as White would feel like I’m rejecting an entire side of myself. Like I’m trying to hide my Opa.

So, I make myself stop thinking about it for a while, and settle back down on just being “mixed.” Its an answer no one can deny, or tell me that I’m wrong.

And as a result, I find myself approaching prying questions or opportunities reserved for BIPOC folks with varying levels of confidence.

“Do you identify as Black, Indigenous, or other Person of Color?”

Yes. Sometimes. Maybe?

Only if you think I am.

#dont mind me I’m just once against faced with impossible questions #biracial #writing

[whoslaurapalmer]

lulu watches doctor who; a good man goes to war/let’s kill hitler

well those episodes.........happened

-moffat ONCE AGAIN pulling the bait and switch with amy sounding like she's talking about the doctor but really talking about rory -although okay i'm gonna give him the benefit of the doubt for a hot moment here and wonder, does that wind up saying anything, about the person rory is, about the person rory might be becoming, if rory is becoming anything? is rory........like all companions, to some extent, becoming like the doctor, or a being that is, better than the doctor, in a way -the emphasis on taking the name the last centurion again, too, on the doctor making him take up the name as like, a mantle -also, rory being a nurse (also, moffat, do you???? do you even remember rory is a nurse?) -jury is still out on this one for now cats

-well there is also the fact that the ‘good man’ in the title is assumed to be the doctor, when it’s not. the doctor says as much, that he has too many rules to be a good man. the good man is rory, really, right?

-the doctor blowing up the cybermen to make a point!! wahoo ~ -you know what. by the way. it's not that i hate the cybermen but that i........personally find the cybermen the most disconcerting of who villains. they make me the most uncomfortable

- "do not interact with headless monks without divine permission" is, i must admit, just a really fucking hilarious line -of course they were headless!!! did not expect the little like. twisty tie trash bag necks but that was an added horror bonus

-yes it's very clear the thin fat gay married anglican marines will not end well. very clear. this is moffat. i'm exhausted -you don’t even give them names. and then. turn one of them into a headless monk who is never heard from again. wow what a great job.

-oh this is where jenny and vastra and strax come in -wait so strax is just dead now?????? just like that????? damn -he comes back, though. i mean, i guess that’s, before he dies........but he comes back, i guess

-heyyyyy dorium with a head!! i didn't know dorium's head was once attached. -.........where else would it have been, though, now that i think about it. -apparently! i just assumed dorium was always a head

- "those aren't stories, they're true." about people telling stories about the doctor -okay you know what. i think i might actually let moffat go on this one. i do actually like the emphasis on the doctor not only having a history -- not only being able to call in debts across the universe (and dorium saying to pity those he'd call on) -- but that history being acknowledged as dangerous, the doctor being dangerous and knowing themselves to be a sizeable, powerful threat, especially after the things ten did, especially seeing that in eleven -what i don't like is moffat's occasional leaning into 'don't you know who i am' sort of territory bc he did that with ten too and i'm. eh about it. i don't care much for the braggadocious take, i think sometimes it leans as moffat making the doctor proud of or confident in that kind of record because it happens so often, when the doctor is anything but, but i will let it go because i think the overall vibe of it is good, in eleven being the doctor that like. embraces the threat the doctor brings. purposely, inadvertently. not super taking pride in it unless the doctor can use it for themselves, for what the doctor wants -because again eleven's priority over everything else is always always always amy

-the....."big milk thing" line -just like. fucking unnecessary. it's not. at all. i'm like. ugggg -the GOING OUT OF YOUR WAY to sexualize amy from the perception of an infant. you think all babies only look at their mothers in terms of food. like it’s just a low joke. why go for it -especially bc. realistically how much time has baby!melody spent with amy to even have that association with her -but either way!!!!!!!!! amy is more than that!!!!!!!!!!!!

-the doctor -having a cot -the cot. the doctor's cot. -yep that's a thing on the tardis that's a thing the doctor has carried around this whole entire time that was the doctor's that's from gallifrey -:') -THE 'THAT'S THE DOCTOR'S COT!' OF IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DO I EVEN NEED TO KEEP GOING

-me, earlier: so was amy yoinked like.......in the three month gap between impossible astronaut/day of the moon eleven: she must've been taken just before america me: WHEN????? WHEN DID THAT HAVE THE TIME TO HAPPEN. MY GOD BUT WHEN -if we had just seen............something. anything. the hint of a something. to make that possible. plausible. to make me go 'yeah okay i'll dig it instead of just moffat throwing things around.’

-"why would a time lord be a weapon?" "well, they've seen you." "me?" -just, the absolute, abject misery in "me?" -the doctor is aware of it until the doctor is confronted with it and then they're like :( why would you say that :( -it’s different, when someone says what you think of yourself deep down out loud, what you try not to think

-oh i will say i liked the.....implication that time lords Happened from being around the time vortex. i don't know i thought that was fine

-amy knowing that it wasn't necessarily the doctor's fault that melody was yoinked but also being. so upset with him anyway. somebody to be upset at. knowing he doesn't deserve it and then not having anywhere to put it. still being angry -but it also being his fault, definitely. a little. by virtue of being such a threat that this chain of events came to happen. that eleven and the doctor's actions did finally truly once and for all affect amy in a way that's not going to be changed when eleven has done every single thing and every single terrible thing for amy -i love when amy gets to be angry when amy gets to be terrible and selfish (in like. a way that matters more than usual. more than just her regular snappy personality)

-"they're always brave." oh that's gonna hurt when face the raven comes up. mmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMM M M M M

-ohhhh i love eleven being angry at river. i also love eleven being angry. i love love love eleven's anger, when it's not eleven's controlled anger, when it's the doctor of eleven (ish? thereabouts?) long long lifetimes falling apart -"but you carry on the way you are, what might that word come to mean?" yes indeed though -although yes i am aware that too is building up to the day of the doctor in a way.....................regretfully...................

-tadaaaaaaa. the river reveal. -wahoo. (a much less enthusiastic wahoo than earlier) -i mean, it's just........like............................... -i don't like it. i don't think it's needed. i think it just makes things more convoluted instead of like. tying things together -not that doctor who is ever the pinnacle of truly tying things together in a neat lil bow but i feel like it's just. making it more twisty than it needed to be -the, like. having a child raised to kill the doctor. not bad! okay! it's fine! but i'm just like. soooooooo not enthused about river being melody. i'm not. and i never will be. i think it's just another instance of moffat going 'look how clever i can be' without actually doing anything meaningful. it's just. very fucking whatever to me

-so i was like. vaguely vibing with a good man goes to war, it was fine, but like. idk my brain tuned out SO HARD during let's kill hitler -we all know hitler didn't need to be there. we all know it was awkward and uncomfortable as hell and very unnecessary and the plot doesn't even revolve around actually trying to kill hitler at all they could've been in ANY time period and it would've played out exactly the same. -sigh.

-ahhhh here is the crop circle -"you never answer your phone" at all times i am BEGGING for the phone to be martha's little flip phone. martha i miss you martha i hope you're okay

-yes you can very much see the river in mels. -also, mels. - ~i do not like mels~ -i KNOW it's because mels is melody is river etc that she grows up obsessed with the doctor but it's also like.........it takes away from baby!amy and her relationship with the doctor, the friendship amy wanted, how amy grows up, what the doctor meant to amy as a child -and that made me sad. -another companion shoved aside in favor of ~river and the doctor and THEIR shenanigans~ yes i'm being mean but i stand by it -oh, and baby!rory. you sweet summer child

-"i need to weigh myself!" does she? really????? really -just..........the exhaustion of moffat writing women. is bearing down on me in these two

-OH IT'S MORE SHERLOCK-ESQUE SCANS OF ITEMS IN A ROOM TIME, IS IT???????? -no, that i will never let go

-I WILL SAY i do not mind at all this og form of river before she is really river just delightfully doing whatever she wants and killing eleven. like, i did enjoy that.

-"time can be rewritten" makes yet another appearance -"remember kennedy?" YOU COULD'VE MADE THIS ABOUT KENNEDY!!!!!!! -or would that too have been awkward. ugggg idk

-ahhhh the fabled "give me someone i like" scene appears -no eleven you don't like you :') eleven especially :') eleven works so hard to like himself though, i think. i think there were shades of that, of eleven......trying to work harder at it. does not work though :’) -that the first person the tardis picks after eleven is rose my babygirl my beloved rose rose rose :') -i do wish eleven had said something more than just. being guilty. in seeing rose and martha and donna

-you know, it could've worked as like.................instead of bringing back the time lords and giving the doctor a new regeneration cycle like that -when river 'uses her regenerations' to save eleven, they could've like, counted. towards the doctor's. you know?? she'd only used, what, two?? three, max?? -idk i think it was a possible option???????? -i don't know how much i really like it either but i am always looking for 'well if you DIDN'T just bring back gallifrey what ELSE could you have done to solve the regeneration limit problem'

-so all that happened! alright. okay.

-one regret in not going back to my eleven watch earlier is that night terrors looks horrifying and goddamn i could've watched that in october

#lulu talks about doctor who

[stitchlingbelle]

Watching Avatar, Part 4

Ok so I'm getting a little binge-y about this show...

16. "The Deserter": This is a great episode. I always love getting to see some non-evil or non-Fire Nation-affiliated firebenders. The refusal to teach Aang had big Yoda vibes to me, a lifelong Star Wars fan. And of course Aang, who's always thought of bending as play and never really worried about hurting anyone before, doesn't yet have the discipline to do it safely and blows it. I feel for him, but refusing to learn isn't going to work in the long run. Interesting that waterbending gets a level up into healing powers. Make me wonder what unexpected variations the other forms of bending might have... (And of course loved seeing Zhao get his butt kicked, and how. Hope this isn't the last we see of Jeong Jeong.)

17. "The Northern Air Temple": Interesting episode. I liked Aang's continued journey dealing with the loss of his people and I liked Teo a lot. Obviously the ending was A Warning of Things to Come, but it was to me an especially big reminder of the danger they bring with them wherever they go. (Seriously, what happens to these towns when they leave??)

18. "The Waterbending Master": PLOT PLOT PLOT I live for this shit. Wow, Sokka actually got to be smooth! My meta-brain is dubious that this will work out, as it is Too Early In The Show For Happiness. LET'S GO KATARAAAAA you show that sexist ass! I do find it a little weird that her grandmother never mentioned she's from, you know, the other side of the planet. Especially given the Gaang's stated intention of, you know, going there. (Maybe just an early-installment issue.) Heartbroken for Iroh thinking he's lost Zuko-- but no, apparently he's totally on top of things. The Batman thing is back. Is there something weird about Zuko's superhero identity being blue, given the color-coded nature of this world? Again, love the continuity touch of the pirates.

19. "The Siege of the North, Part 1": PLOT PLOT PLOT not surprising, given it's the end of the season and a two-parter. Very lore-dense, too. If waterbending comes from the moon and firebending from the sun, and I assume earthbending from the earth, where is airbending from? I thought Sokka was going to get in a lot more trouble, and am worried. Gotta say, I respect how seriously they are depicting war in this show. They're really selling the horrors of it in a very kid-friendly way. (To that point, I really appreciate them showing bending getting used for all sorts of non-combat things-- giving the kids something to fantasize about being/doing that isn't, you know, antithetical to the point of the show...)

20. "The Siege of the North, Part 2": Dammit, I knew Yue couldn't last. Very sad for Sokka and for her, I liked her character. Very interesting how they positioned Zuko and Iroh in this episode, contrasting them with Zhao directly for the Gaang's benefit. (Though I have no doubt that Zuko's eventual admission to the Gaang is going to be hampered by Sokka blaming him for the loss of Yue.) Can't wait to see what Iroh and Zuko do now, especially with Zuko's sister (!?) after them, and without the resources they've been (usually) able to rely on. Very pleased to see Katara level up her bending and be treated as a master.

The next DVD says "Earth" on it, so presumably they're off to learn Earthbending. Hopefully that means Aang getting to see Bumi again. All these kids need a hug.

#avatar: the last airbender

[demonicintegrity]

just wanted to pop in and say that, as a non-ww fan who's been on almost all possible sides of the allegations (been sxually groomed, become codependent on someone w/o their intent, + had sm1 codependent on me w/o my intent), i fully agree w yr take! i get why ppl were/might still be sus due to how the screenshots r presented but even taking all the evidence at face value it doesn't seem "cancel" worthy.

i don't doubt op's feelings + ik how intense it can feel when ur codependent on sm1 but not enough ppl know it can happen w/o the other person cultivating it. ww could have recognized the iffyness of getting involved w a fan in that way + been more understanding of ops mental illness tho often its hard 4 ppl to comprehend how much sm1 else idolizes them esp if they're a small local celeb. it rly seems 2 me like a mutually toxic relationship w real hurt on both ends.

i rly truly feel 4 the op + understand how he was hurt by ww's actions, i hope he can heal n grow from it. it's also so common for ppl w codependent tendencies to feel like they're less at fault for their unhealthy relationships n that's a huge problem that causes these cycles to repeat. but the arguing abt how u can't be groomed if 18+ or a SW (or even naturally tend to be codependent) only hurts real ppl who have been thru it.

i hate 2 see all the victim blaming n debunking n hate toward op! but i think any misrepresentation was a result of his hurt + effect it truly did have on him. ultimately it shouldve stayed private + i find the idea of canceling sm1 due to having an overall unhealthy relationship in the past unsettling. sorry this is so long + thanks 4 putting a sympathetic and logical voice out there!

You’re good nonny, and my thoughts exactly. Op was clearly hurt by this relationship and I will never ever deny him that. I want him to find peace and get better. But how he presented the evidence just doesn’t show any sort of intentional abuse. I’m not saying it’s not possible, the story as he presented it doesn’t even paint Will as that bad of a guy.

I get that Op doesn’t care about listening to Will’s music and it’s more about protecting people from the person, but as I said in the post, the only lesson I gleaned was “watch your codependency and communication issues.” It was never about cancelling, (which is such a stupid fucking fake concept of how consequences are dealt with but that’s a separate discussion.) it was about preventing more hurt and I think that’s a good stand Op is trying to take. A noble one, especially since he opened up during a spiral to do so.

Honestly I think the screenshots of former bandmates saying Will was an asshole holds more weight against his character than Op’s original claims. I still don’t know what exactly my conclusion of it is, because I know nothing about Will’s life let alone his bandmates so I’m still piecing the picture. I put a link to those in the replies of my original post.

I just feel so exceptionally blind and in the dark regarding all this because I have literally only heard Will speak outside of listening to his music once, and that’s because I came across an old stand up clip unintentionally on YouTube. I truly know absolutely nothing about the band as people and that’s why I keep holding my judgments until smth “more concrete” even if realistically these are probably the mostly the evidence will go.

But yea, the absolutely nasty response Op has gotten is awful. It’s partially why I wrote the post, hoping people would learn to have more sympathy for him. I don’t want to assume intentional foul play from him (outside of posting the nude, which is illegal and wrong and unnecessary.) because I know the talks of whether or not said pic was doctored are around, as well as how legitimate the insta convos are and smth about the timeline math. I’m not involving myself in any of that because I am not the person to deduce those kinds of things. For sake of giving Op the benefit of the doubt, I’m assuming this things are legitimate and the slip ups (like how I pointed the change of social media in the post) we’re just genuine human slip ups.

As you said, the derogatory remarks around Op are practically worse the Op’s original claim. Perpetuating an idea that only a certain type of person can experience abuse is very wrong and dangerous. Even I think as the story stands now it wasn’t abuse, I would never say op or anyone in a similar place isn’t capable of being abused. I worry about how that narrative could take off.

#will wood #ask #discourse

[tuiyla]

I often come to this glee blog to vent, and this time is no different.

I was scrolling down a glee confessions blog from the fandom's hayday, and holy fucking shit what a mistake that was. Glee was the most terrible fandom in this planet. Never have I seen a fandom insult and bully each and every cast member to such a capacity. The racism, the misogyny, the hate, the bullying. My god, never I have seen so many people insult and spread lies about Cory Monteith and his passing. I am disgusted and I am angry, so very angry that one of the pillers of the glee tumblr fandom had allowed and encourged slutshaming, fatshaming, bullying, and homophobia on their page just in the name of free speech. The amount of times Naya and lea had been called sluts, whores, and other degrading nicknames in regards to their bodys and careers. No wonders so many of the actors distanced themselves from the show, the fanbase was insane.

At least I can rest knowing the glee fandom could never be the same as it was and be somewhat hopeful of the progress it achived.

I wasn't in the Glee fandom in its heyday and there's maybe a teeny tiny part of me that regrets that, if only because there's always something special about a live fandom where episodes are still coming out. That said, most of the time I thank the lord I was never tempted into keeping up with Glee as it was airing and that's because the Glee fandom was always notorious for its intensity. You couldn't have paid me enough to touch it with a 10 foot-pole in 2012. So all in all, none of this surprises me.

I tend to stay away from confessions blogs as they're often an excuse for people to spread their horrible opinions - not horrible in that I merely disagree but in that they're actively hateful and often towards the actors, not even the characters, just as you described. Don't get me wrong other fandoms could be wild too and active fandoms nowadays are still yikes sometimes but Glee... Glee was a beast of its own, I think.

It's disgusting. No other word for it. I can only hope those who disrespected Cory and called the cast horrible, horrible names were too young and immature to realize how fucked up all that was. I hope they're grown now, looking back in regret. That's the most I can hope for, really. But you know, I also watched from the sidelines two years ago when people said absolutely appalling things about Naya - as she was still missing, her loved ones dreading the worst. As she was found, not even buried yet but pathetic terminally online trolls already spewing their hate, their ignorant takes on a human being who just lost her life. The mother of a then 4-year-old boy. I have to believe they were too damn young to realize how utterly despicable that was. I have to, because the alternative is, what? That someone could be so willfully rotten? Heck, I saw horrible horrible takes on the cast on reddit about a year ago, too. People up on their high horses, speaking about ~problematic~ things the cast have done, judging them like they were just people on our TVs created for our consumption. They aren't.

But yeah. My own mini venting aside, there's a reason I stay away from reddit now and why I curate my fandom space, not just in terms of Glee as much as possible now. I don't have the patience for this bullshit. I barely have the strength to give them the benefit of the doubt and hope they have, or will eventually change. I don't like focusing on the actors instead of the characters in general; sometimes appreciating them, sure, and in times like these with Cory and Naya's anniversaries it's nice to keep them in our thoughts. But in my experience, things tend to get out of hand once fans allow themselves to look at the actors as anything but human beings whose private lives we do not have any kind of entitlement to. Real-life shipping is a good example. Getting mixed up in made-up dramas and having the audacity to assume we could ever possibly know the life Cory had, the life Naya had, being another one.

Here's the thing about free speech, since you brought it up: just because you can say stuff doesn't mean you should, and certainly doesn't mean anyone's obligated to provide you with a platform. I've never run a confession-type blog myself and I doubt I ever will, but I have run fan sites and just for me personally there would have been rules against confessions about the cast and hateful rhetoric. This sense of... entitlement that people feel towards actors and celebrities. It's disturbing. It's an ugly, ugly side of fandom.

I'm glad you feel safe and comfortable enough to vent. I hope it's okay I vented in return. I suppose, times like these, it's the "basic human decency" and "media studies" parts of my brain automatically starting a conversation. I'd like to think people, in general, are more respectful towards Cory now. Naya, too, of course, but I feel like Cory had even more lies and hate spread about him due to the circumstances of his death. With the 9th anniversary of his passing coming up, I can only hope his loved ones feel more at peace now. Not that nine years matter all that much when you lose someone - I recently had a 9th anniversary of my own grief. But hey, this is still about Glee! So, yeah. Let's be grateful for the progress. I'm grateful for the people I surround myself with in this fandom and I don't need more. And reading this I once again thanked the heavens I was never even tempted to join the Glee fandom at its peak.

#anon #glee asks #glee fandom #tw death #tw grief #cory monteith #naya rivera #discussions of their deaths please be warned #just lamenting on the cruelty of celeb culture i suppose #and fan culture too #i have a feeling as to who you are anon but dw i'll keep it between us haha #for real i'm happy to be able to create a safe space #glee cast

[funkymbtifiction]

EFJ superego things, low intuition, and so on ;)

How do I tell my superego to be quiet? I know I’m a 2, a 6 or a 9 and I keep on beating myself up for not helping people enough even though I’ve been told I’m thoughtful/helpful. I always feel like I could be doing a better job and be more composed/perfect and I keep on working on my presentation and avoiding mistakes but to no avail. I am worried that I’m letting everyone down — I have such a crazy volunteer schedule and I keep on getting asked to do things and I can’t say no. Is this typical 269 stuff?

Sounds like a core 2w1.

Something to take to heart: when you are always picking up the slack, there's no room for anyone else to take the initiative to help -- and sometimes that's what other people need to do. One way to help them reach their full potential is to leave the space for them to know they are needed, by not saying yes to everything.

One way to dismantle your super-ego is to notice when you find it hard to tell anyone no, slow down, and ask, "Do I really want to do this, or am I just guilt-tripping myself into it?" If the answer is the latter, there is no shame in saying no, nicely. "I wish I could, but I am just too busy to take on another thing. I'm sure you will find someone capable of handling this or that you can get it done, because you are amazing!"

You also have to learn to factor your own needs into things, and self-care, something 2s struggle with -- but the bottom line is this: you can't help anybody else if you are too exhausted, burned out, or busy, because you are not taking sufficient down time and resting. You do not need to do everything, be everything, and get everything done, for everybody.

And yes, 269s tend to be pushovers in a way -- there's no fix in there that isn't somewhat attached to people, and 9s loathe any kind of conflict, so they will go along with it to avoid disappointing others.

Do you experience these things as a fellow superego type?

To some extent, yes. I guilt-trip myself regularly for not being nicer, more generous, more accommodating, or for slacking off instead of getting things done; I feel guilty just sitting around doing nothing or watching television when there's a lot of stuff to do. I had to learn to give myself permission to delete asks I don't want to answer, rather than feeling obligated to respond to them. (Sorry, people! But that's how it's gonna be.) But it's somewhat helpful for me, being a Fi and not a dominant 2, in that I prioritize what I want to do above all else, so I can manage a degree of separation from people. (For example: I care more about writing than answering asks, so writing comes first; any leftover energy goes to answering the asks I care about.)

I also am wondering how to become more intuitive — I think I am probably a sensor because I have difficulty with blind idealism and I have a photographic memory yet I still put a rose colored lens on things instead of seeing them how they are.

This is pretty typical for a 9-2 stem. They hate negativity, and 269s are the type most inclined to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, forgive endlessly, and assume their motives are purer than they are. Whichever one is leading will direct this more -- the 692 is a bit more negative and skeptical, but the 296 or the 926 are positive.

My mom, in contrast, is an ENP who intuits things immediately and goes tangent to tangent and is SUCH a good and funny conversationalist. She clearly leads with Ne and it comes so naturally to her. Ideas are her life. She also reads people’s intentions much more & is right about her various hunches. (“I knew it would end like that,” etc.) How can I make my Ne this way?

Why do you want that? Just to be an interesting conversationalist? I am sure as an ESFJ that you are fine as you are, that you are interesting as you are, and that you have enough Ne to be quite funny if you were to lighten up a little and give yourself more credit. You will never have as strong or as accurate a Ne as your intuitive mother, so don't try to achieve those levels. Lower Ne is very good at being creative, seeing things in new ways, and optimistic, but it's not going to be right all the time. Just let it be true to itself, and use it for stories, whimsy, and coming up with alternative possibilities. :)

#question #mbti #enneagram #enneagram 2

[komatsunana]

i wanted to thank you first for the nana analysis content which is so so so interesting, but also for supporting heard on main... i saw your tags on that takumi post back then and i didnt want to overstep any boundaries so i never asked but i kinda assumed you were on amber's side and that was so early during the trial and everybody i followed outside of my twitter sphere was pro depp, so seeing that gave me a little bit of hope even though it was mainly speculation. if you dont feel comfortable answering in public its fine you dont have to, i just wanted to say it was brave and i agree with you and i thank you with my whole heart for standing up for women and victims (even the fictional ones: your takes and @mediocreauthor on nana's women especially are so refreshing)

I am glad to not make you feel so alone, and rest assured you are far from it. I too have been feeling isolated from many people lately, because of this trial. And I admit that I considered not replying as you said I could do, and just taking your words at face value and feel comfort for them. But experiencing this trial has been frankly traumatic for me and I have things to say that are not necessarily to you Anonymous.

(tho anon I do invite you to my NANA and Ai Yazawa Discord - we've talked about the Trial and you are far from alone there too)

To anyone pro-Depp following me, I give you the benefit of the doubt. That you care about abuse victims, that you do not think rape and abuse is funny, that you never laughed at all the memes that have come from this, know all that is inappropriate. That when I discuss Takumi as an abuser, you agree and understand that victims of abuse are not at fault of their abuse. So give me the same benefit, and know that I care about victims of abuse.

Do some research. Actual research. If you think only watching the trial is an unbiased account, you are wrong. Even if you claim to understand that media is biased and you can only trust the trial itself, you are WRONG. The American judicial system cannot be trusted, under any circumstance. Lots of evidence was suppressed for this trial, unfairly. I will not link you to it, DO YOUR RESEARCH YOURSELF.

I do not say this to be unkind. However, you need to stop trusting social media to give you information without knowing their qualifications and authority to give that information. I am a NANA blog, primarily. I talk about fictional characters in a celebrity life in which abuse and rape happen and so I discuss them. I am by no means qualified or an authority on those subjects, especially in real-world aspects, but I research myself for my own private understanding. But I am not a fount of knowledge on such serious issues and you cannot trust everyone that claims that they are trustworthy sources.

Even if the American justice system could ever be trusted, do you think it fair that jurors went home out of trial hours? Home where their family members shared memes and general public opinion of the trial with them?

And if you claim to watch the trial and only the trial... Did you? Or did you watch trial highlights, created by biased persons? And no matter how many episodes of Criminal Minds or Body Language Experts on YouTube you watch, you are not an expert in body language.

Please think, please research.

Abusers can be charming and seemingly generous, victims can be unlikable and unpleasant.

Remember, the pop culture celebrity phenomena just last year was Britney Spears. Not even just about the abuse she underwent by her family and conservationist, but everyone realizing how unfairly public opinion treated her was, how viciously people tore into her. Remember if you were too young to feel accountability for public perception then, you are not now.

You are not immune to propaganda, you are not immune to public perception influencing you.

More than anything, remember this isn't about sides. This isn't Team Edward, Team Jacob kind of shit. This is about supporting victims of abuse from abusers and if that isn't your priority in this trial you need to sort them out so it is.

I could say more, but I won't. Anyway, this post isn't rebloggable and I won't be answering further asks about the trial publicly. Continued NANA posts will recommence and some of them will be about abuse and rape because that is what the series is depicts and I love this series and want to talk about it in all it's aspects. The real world is impacted by fictional depictions, but more over these fictionalized accounts are very much influenced by the real world.

Victims of abuse you are not alone. If you need help, you have options. You can call the Domestic Abuse Hotline [phone]) (also for TTY: 1-800-787-3224) click here for more information. Someone I love contacted a domestic shelter during this trial, to get the help they needed to escape an abusive relationship. That person is safe now and there are options and support for you and your loved ones. You don't have to do this alone.

Much love. ♡

#ask #Anonymous #domestic abuse #i scream #long post

[ravetaper]

Marshmello EDC 2023 Live Set - Friday Kinetic Field

This is a 60-minute audio recording of Marshmello EDC 2023 live set from Friday at Kinetic Field. The set was recorded May 19, 2023, at Electric Daisy Carnival, which took place at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. The set began at 1:48 the following morning but there were two interruptions near the start. This is the uninterrupted final hour of the set.

Rave Tapes · Marshmello EDC 2023 Live Set - Friday Kinetic Field

I'm at the point where the audio is ready, the thumbnails are made, and I have to come up with some coherent words to accompany the post. I'm listening back to the set and...wow. It's hitting me.

This was Marshmello's Friday night set at the big KinteticFIELD. There were problems at the beginning.

It had started drizzling lightly, but it was raining hard enough to concern to the AV crew. There's usually nothing covering EDC's stages, as rain in Vegas at that time of year is somewhat rare. But then again, sporadic desert showers are known to happen.

The gear was still functioning 10 minutes into the rain, but the crew was nervous. They eventually brought out a large commercial folding canopy. It was big and heavy. And, it must have been new, because it looked very stiff. The assembly was so stiff, four guys couldn't manage to expand the structure and raise the canopy. The crew was struggling with the canopy for several minutes. Meanwhile, Marshmello is off to the side waiting to get back to the decks. The guys are struggling, the song is elapsing, the transition has to happen soon. Eventually Marshmello forces his way to the decks and attempts to salvage the mix, but it's too late. The blend trainwrecks. Marshmello throws up his hands and tells the crowd he'll hopefully be back in a minute after the issues get fixed. Bear in mind, it's still drizzling and the canopy still isn't up yet.

What was I feeling? I felt RELIEVED! Allow me to explain.

The trainwreck meant everything to me. It's called a trainwreck because the sound of two records clashing is pretty terrible, like watching a car crash or trainwreck. BUT, it can only happen if a DJ is actually mixing!!

This weekend was my first time seeing Marshmello. I honestly didn't know what his live sets were like. I know his history and know he's been a part of the scene for a while and is a legit producer. But one never really knows what's going on with the live sets. We assume all the artists are actually mixing tracks in realtime, but rumors abound about artists "faking it" or merely playing back a pre-recorded set.

I'm not saying I expected that from Marshmello. Honestly, I didn't know what to expect, and I always give artists the benefit of the doubt.

But the trainwreck proved that live mixing was live! Marshmello was legitimately killing it. In an instant, the guy's success was totally justified, and my fandom was likewise validated.

About the mix, it was one of those big room variety sets when the artist intermixes their hits with other classic anthems. And damn it was good.

I explained in the Marshmello b2b Svdden Death post how I've appreciated Marshmello's music over the years. I haven't been a super fan. I'm more into house, bass music, and more underground flavors. But I apparently have a soft spot for Marshmello's mainstream EDM trap sound.

Here's the thing. Some of Marshmello's melodies are pretty timeless. I don't know if his songs are as timeless as those written by Paul McCartney or Billy Joe Armstrong. But I am saying they are up there.

The melodies are so damn simple – just a few quarter notes and half notes using one of 'Mello's trademark raspy synth voices. Instantly recognizable, instantly sing-able. Even though I am a musician and a creative type myself, I still marvel at those who seemingly generate such beauty out of thin air.

People talk about crying during the emotional sets. I'm not admitting that it happened to me during "Happier", but I'm not denying it, either.

So the combo of the music, the trainwreck, overcoming the trainwreck, and delivering the remainder of set like a pro...it means I fight for Marshmello now.

Enough talk. Let's get this one posted and move on to the next one: Malaa b2b Wax Motif...

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#marshmello #edc 2023 #live set #las vegas #trap #edm #rave tapes