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roonyxx · 2 years

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Same 4/4 Different Souls

By Roonyxx and Jay-and-dean

Pairings : AU Dean x reader, Dean x reader

Summary : Two Deans… What could go wrong ?

Serie Warnings : Smut, Angst, hurt (and jealous) Dean, hurt AU Dean, hurt reader… hurt everyone, Swearing.

Wordcount : 3.8k

Note : This is a collaboration beetween both of us. We can’t both edit the same post, so we decided we would post 1 chapter/2 each. This is the final chapter of Same; shout out to my babe @jay-and-dean for working with me on this amazing journey, I hope you all enjoyed this adventure as much as we did!

We both worked as much on this story and it’s the result of both our brains but also both our hearts.

Please, if you want to show love for this story, don’t forget we were together in this.

Part 1: Same eyes

Part 2: Different hearts

Part 3: Same names

Jay’s Masterlist

Roonyxx Masterlist

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4. Different souls

Dean came down the stairs from letting the Winchesters 2.0 out. Wiping his face, he was relieved that they left. But he could see that Y/n was clearly upset, she was wiping her eyes and sniffing.

As Dean ascended the stairs he sat down at the illuminated world map table, his eyes focused on Melville Canada.

Sam stretched his back, he could feel the obvious tension between the two and he didn’t want to end up in the middle of it.

“I’m exhausted from the whole double me double you thing, i’m gonna get some sleep guys.”

Dean looked up at his brother.

“Night Sammy.”

Y/n turned to Sam, trying to hide her eyes.

“Goodnight Sam.”

With that Sam left them behind in the war room.

“You okay sweetheart?” Dean asked as his eyes tried to met hers.

“Yeah… I just need a drink” she said a little too coldly.

The other Dean’s words had hit her like a slap, and she really felt confused and… hurt somehow.

Y/n got up to take a glass and a bottle of whiskey, sitting across from Dean without a word. He frowned. When he opened his mouth to say something, she cut him :

“I think you have had enough whiskey for a while Dean.” She said gruffly.

“Yeah you’re probably right.” He scratched the back of his neck.

Y/n filled up her glass and shot it all down at once. Her eyes focused on the table in front of her.

The tension in the room was palpable, both of them had obviously things on their hearts but each one was waiting for the other to address the elephant in the room.

Dean let out a big sigh.

“What did he tell you? It looked serious. And you’re upset…” He watched her face, to see if he could read her, but she looked… shocked? Scared even.

“Nothing that matters.” She took another drink, no way she was gonna tell him and make things even worse.

“Stop being like that, Y/n… Talk to me.”

Talk to him ? When he was himself letting her with no answer ! He got hurt, fine ! But why that reaction ? Why not telling her anything else than I’m sorry.

“I know you’re furious or something.” Y/n didn’t make eye contact when she finally talked, letting her frustration overcome her guilt.

“Furious ? I’m not furious ?” Dean frowned.

Y/n scoffed dryly.

“Oh yeah not at all, isn’t that why you drank an entire bar ?”

Dean leaned over the table to take her hand in his.

“I’m not furious Y/n.”

Y/n pulled her hand out of his grasp.

“I never saw you that drunk Dean, and believe me, I have seen you drunk.”

He slumped back in his chair, rubbing his hand over his face,

“It wasn’t because I was angry with you Y/n.”

“Not angry huh ? You came home and went all fight club!” Y/n finally yelled at Dean.

“I wasn’t angry with you, not even with him!” Dean yelled back.

“Then why did you hit him ?” Y/n questioned him. “Please answer, this time…”

Dean looked down at his hands on the table.

“If he didn’t wear the same face it wouldn’t have happened. I was angry at myself.”

“That makes no sense Dean.” He could see she was annoyed now.

Several silent minutes passed, Y/n’s annoyance turned to a deep sadness, he wasn’t going to talk, she will have to leave with the idea of hurting him that bad, but not knowing exactly how. Tears filled her eyes as a lump grew in her throat. After a while, Dean looked at her and sighed, she was in pain, he had to do something.

“How long have we known each other ?”

“7 years.” Y/n shrugged. She very vividly remembered when she first laid eyes on the man she knew she would love forever.

“I was drunk because I was… hurt.” Dean told her.

Y/n frowned.

“How do you mean hurt ?”

“He achieved what I wanted for years in just one day…”

“I have no idea what you are talking about, Dean.” She looked at him, trying to read what he was saying on his face.

“I was jealous.” he softly shrugged, in a way to make it seem like it was no big deal.

“Jealous ? Of him ?” Y/n didn’t understand what he meant, of course.

“Yes! He touched you, he kissed you, he got to smell you and keep you close, he got to know what it’s like to be with you, like really be with you. He got to taste your love, he got to see every inch of you, to admire you in the way I always wanted to. When i close my eyes all I can see are his hands on you, hear the noises you made for him and it…it hurts Y/n.”

Now Dean had finally talked, he couldn’t stop.

“But -… I- you want to have sex with me?” Y/n wasn’t sure she heard him right.

Dean shook his head, a deep sigh leaving his lips.

“I- I’m sorry.”

“Dean answer me, did you want to fu-… have sex with me ?” she had to know.

He scoffed darkly.

“Not just sex…”

Y/n waited for him to further explain what he meant with that.

Dean looked her in the eyes.

“I l-love you Y/n.” He stated his voice wavering, he felt so vulnerable, more than ever. He could feel his eyes getting wet despite his will to keep some composure. She didn’t love him, he was sure of it.

“Wh- what ?” She looked at him like he grew a second head.

“I know, I’m sorry, I… I can leave if you want.” Dean was getting out of his chair but she stopped him with a shaky voice.

“Did he tell you to say that ?” He could see the tears threatening to leave her eyes.

“What ?” Dean tilted his head to the side.

Y/n was getting up now, ready to leave. Of course he told Dean that she loved him, he probably wanted to do her a favor, but he just made it worse.

Dean grabbed her arm with a firm but kind gesture making her stop. He didn’t want to frighten her, but now that he revealed his deepest secret, the one he actually thought could ruin his life, there was no way he could live not knowing what she thought of that.

“What are you talking about ?”

She pushed his hand off her, gently.

“He told you to say that, to make me happy RIGHT ?”

“You mean other me ?” Dean questioned, confused, still a little shaken by his own confession.

She didn’t answer but Dean could read of her face that he was right.

“He didn’t tell me anything ! Why would he? What would he say to me Y/n ?”

“Because of this soulmate thing !” a sob choked her and Dean’s eyes widened.

“Soulmates what ?”

“He… Him and his Y/n were soulmates and he… He seemed to think that… “ she couldn’t find her words, or her breath, rib cage suddenly tight. “Dean, he was confusing his love story with our friendship I think, he kept telling me we should be together, but I… I told him.”

“Told him what ?” Dean lightly shook his head.

“That it was not the same, that you…”

She turned and pushed at Dean to give her space. And he couldn’t move.

A million ideas passed through his skull without staying. Soulmates ? How could she know ? What did it even mean ? Did that mean the other him and his Y/n were soulmates too ? Were they, himself and the woman he loved so much, soulmates ? Or not at all ?… He swallowed, like it would move the lump in his throat. Was it possible that he, himself, had a soulmate ? Was it…

She weakly talked again, saving him from drowning in his questions.

“But he knew so…” Tears were rolling down her cheeks.

“He knew what ?” Dean now held her tight by the upper arms.

“That I love you !” She half screamed at him, the words hurting her throat on their way out.

His grip on her loosened, he stood before her as she looked down at her feet.

“Wh-what?” Dean gasped.

“I told him, I’m sorry you… I know you don’t feel the really same and I-”

“You love me?” Dean cut her off.

“Yes Dean… why else would I have sex with him ?! Why … among all the men, would I want him ?” She finally dared to look up at him, her vision blurry because of her tears.

“Because he got the looks without the crap ?” He stated with a sad smile, it broke her heart that he could think of himself like that once more.

“Because I wanted to know what it felt like to kiss you, to have you inside of me, Dean… To hear you moan my name for once…” She muttered the last part as she looked straight ahead to his chest, not wanting to see the disgust in his eyes because she used the other Dean for her own heart.

She felt his hand on her cheek, tilting her head up so he could look in her eyes.

“I want to give you all of that. I love you, Y/n.” He whispered as he wrapped his arms around her.

She put her head on his chest, softly sobbing. She could barely believe what he was saying, her heart racing in her chest, echoing in her head, tears heavily falling between them directly to the floor. How could it be true… And yet, she felt it. In his hand holding the back of her neck, in the soft held back sobs making his chest tremble, in everything that emanated of him, she could feel love.

“He’s not you, I know that because even when I was with him. I only thought of you. I love you Dean.” She lifted her chin to dive in his eyes. “I love you so much.”

He bent down to slowly catch her lips in a tender kiss, barely grazing at first, to then crush softly on her craving mouth, finally feeling her lips on his. He sighed in relief, like he could breathe for the first time in ages.

Her hands wrapped around his neck pulling him down to her, she felt his tongue softly grazing at her bottom lip, wanting access, needing more. It was her. She had seen him kissing, each time clenching her fists, but this time it was her… She parted her lips and let his tongue start a raging fire in her whole body.

But she broke that heavenly kiss because she needed to hear those words again, she to be sure she wasn’t making all this up in her mind :

“You really love me Dean?” she questioned once they parted.

“I really do Y/n, I have been loving you for a long time now.”

A soft smile formed on her lips as she stood on her tiptoes to kiss him again. She couldn’t have enough.

“I’m sorry for… sleeping with him I just, I was stupid… sorry.” She hid her face in his neck again, a wave of new guilt hitting her, if he was in love with her like she was with him, he must have been through hell.

“I’m sorry for acting like a dick and being so hard on you… I was just hurt.”

She slowly started kissing his neck, which pulled a groan from Dean.

“Let me show you how much I love you sweetheart.”

His lips crashed onto hers hungrily, pouring all his love into it. His hands traveled down her body to the back of her thighs and he whispered.

“Jump.”

She jumped up and locked her legs behind his lower back, her arms wrapped around his neck as he carried her to his room.

Entering his room he kicked the door shut behind him, walking to the bed to drop her on it.

He stood at the edge, just watching her for a moment, enjoying the sight before him, and he tried to ignore memories of her voice moaning that stranger’s name. He could see the blush crawling up her neck.

“You’re so beautiful.” He said as he crawled over her.

Her hands cupped his face, just watching him, now that she shamelessly could. Taking in every inch of him, she could see he was doing the same, admiring each other for the first time.

The wrinkles around his eyes as he wore a small smile, the freckles dusted across not only the bridge of his nose but also up his temples, his scruff that slightly scratched against the palms of her hands. His lips slightly parted, spit slick and swollen from her kisses. Her fingers touched the fine naked line between his scruff and ear, the skin feeling incredibly soft beneath her touch.

His eyes were a deep, enchanting shade of green. Her favorite color, she never liked green before she saw his green, they held such warmth and comfort, she wanted to drown in them every time.

His hands moved down her sides, feeling her steady breathing beneath her ribs, her heart thumping in her chest. He moved them down until he reached the end of her shirt to push it up, lowering himself to kiss every inch of skin that was revealed to him. His tongue leaving behind a wet trail, sucking a mark near her belly button.

His touch was intoxicating, she was already panting as her hands fisted his hair which made him smirk against her skin.

He pulled the shirt over her head,, eyes darkening at the sight before him. His hands moved behind her back to unclasp her bra, his finger went to her shoulders as he moved his thumb over the hickey on her neck, as if he was trying to erase it.

“I’m sorry…” If he wasn’t so close he would have never heard her whisper the apology.

“It’s okay Y/n, I’m not mad.” He lowered his face to her neck, sucking a mark over the one she already had and switched to the other side to mark her there too.

Everything was different, his mouth was way more eager and his hands roamed, conquering, discovering her and earning every moan, every little whimper slowly. Her body reacted different too. This was Dean, her Dean, and every touch was overwhelming.

Her hands tugged at his shirt.

“I need to feel you Dean, please ?” She fisted his hair to make him look at her.

He smiled at her, how could he ever refuse her ? With one hand he gripped the back of his shirt to pull it of.

“Woah…” she gasped, her hands carefully touching him.

“What? It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.” The words left his lips before he knew it, he didn’t mean it in the way she thought. Her eyes flickered down, her hands leaving his chest.

“No baby… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” He took her hand and placed it back on his chest. “I’m not angry, it’s just… the jealousy, it can be overwhelming.” He admitted to her as he could see a small smile on her lips.

“What?” he asked her.

“You called me baby.” She said as her smile grew.

“I did, because you are my baby.” He pecked her lips and felt her hands push a little at his chest to roll over him.

She straddled him once he was on his back, a small satisfied smile gracing her face.

“I want you Dean, not a copy. You.” His hands held her by the waist as she shyly started to grind on him. He bit down on his lip, guiding her movement, encouraging her by pushing his hips up.

She bend down, her chest flush against his, her nipples rubbing against his. Her hands went up in his hair, as she kissed him like she always wanted to do. Her hips growing more confident with his growls.

“Fuck baby, I need to feel you, all of you.” Dean gasped against her lips.

She sat up straight, her hands sliding down his body to stop at his belt, unbuckling it and pulling his pants down, Dean kicked it of his feet as he held her up by the waist. She whimpered a little while Dean kept her up, her hips now grinding in the air.

“All of you baby, loose the pants.” He let go of her so she could quickly take off her pants, panties being kicked off too. She straddled him again, rubbing her already wet pussy on his hard cloth covered cock.

“Fuck baby, you’re soaking me.” He groaned as his grip on her tightened crushing her more down on him as he pushed his hips up.

She bend down, kissing his chest, nipping at his nipples which made him gasp, he could feel her smile against his skin.

One of his hand shifted from her waist to in between her thighs, two fingers parting her lips so they hugged his cock through his underwear, cock twitching because of the amount of slick he was already covered in.

“Fuck Dean… I need more…” She whined as she sat up, rolling her hips on him as she put her hands behind her to rest on his thighs.

Dean briefly stopped her movements to take off his underwear, Y/n licking her lips at the sight of his hard cock, she sat down on him once more, the skin to skin contact sending electric through her body, making her grind harder. One of her hands wrapped around his cock pumping him in the same time as her pussy lips hugged him, pushing his cock close to her as her clit reached his tip, rubbing deliciously.

He was panting beneath her, head thrown back and a concentrated frown on his face. She rubbed faster, feeling her climax climb, she was so close to fall over that edge.

“Fuck Dean… I’m c-close… so c-close” She was sweating, gasping his name.

She clenched around nothing as she came on top of him, her body convulsing at how hard her orgasm hit her.

“FUCK DEAN!”

Dean struggled not to come himself at just the sight of her coming.

“Yes baby, that’s it come all over me.”

She dropped on the bed next to him, she started laughing in her after bliss haze.

“Fuck Dean, you’re not even inside me and I already came harder than ever before.”

He chuckled, loving the sound of those words, loving how natural they felt ; and turn to her, hand cupping her breast as he sucked her nipple into his mouth, teeth grazing it.

“Harder than ever before huh?” His chest swelled with pride, a wicked smirk on his face as he moved between her legs. The heavy weight of his cock resting against her thigh.

She bit her lips as she moved her hips so his cock would rest against her pussy.

“Do I need-” He started.

“I want to feel all of you Dean, I want you bare” her hands on his lower back to push him closer.

During his hesitation, she could see the question burning in his eyes. Now she new he had been so jealous, she could imagine his feelings, she could guess what he was thinking, because she knew jealousy too well.

“He… I didn’t let him… you know, only you can do that.” She told him, he catched her lips in a sweet and tender kiss.

“I love you.” He told her.

“I love you too Dean.”

He guided his cock to her entrance, pushing inside her slowly.

“Fuck you’re tight baby…” he panted in her neck.

She welcomed him, searching if face, her mouth agape. He didn’t know her and seeing his pupils dilate made her heart flutter. This was them, not the echo of another story, and they had everything to learn about each other. Her hands grabbed his shoulders hard at the intense pleasure spreading in her whole body, her nails leaving moon crested shapes in his skin.

“De… m-move please move.” She begged him once he bottomed out.

He pulled back, slowly, his cock dragging along her inner walls. As he did, she stared at him, taking in the nobility of his shape. He looked stronger than his double, rougher around the edges, he carried the violence of his life on his warrior shape, without looking brutal himself. A single tear rolled from the corner of her eyes when her love overflew her.

Leaving just the tip in he slammed back into her, making her scream out his name in surprise.

“FUCK DEAN YES.”

He started pounding into her hard, pushing her up the bed, unable to tame that hunger inside him, that craving. Her hands went above her head to hold onto the headboard. This was so intense, both too much and not enough and her mouth opened in ecstasy. This wasn’t only about sex, he was claiming her.

“You’re mine.” He growled in her ear as his cock hit that sweet spot deep inside her over and over.

“Y-Yes.”

“Tell me, tell me you’re mine, I need to hear it.” He bit her shoulder, arms holding her behind her shoulders, pounding into her like there was no tomorrow.

“FUCK I’m yours Dean, I’M YOURS !”

She could feel he was losing his rhythm, the sounds he made indicating he was close.

With one hard thrust he filled her up, his cum shooting deep inside her, coating her walls white.

“FUCK YES Y/N YES!” His his jerking into her made her fall over the edge to succumb into her own orgasm, scratching his back as she clenched hard around him.

“DEAN YES FUUUCK!”

Dean fell on top of her panting, hips jerking slightly.

Her hands wrapped around him, fingers tunneling through his sweaty hair. She didn’t really notice it before but they smelled slightly different, her Dean smelled like the mundane shampoo she bought him, the leather of baby and bunker, he smelled like the bunker, like home.

There were many differences between the two of them apart from just their smells. Her Dean’s hands were rougher, probably from digging the graves and working on baby, he had more scars than the fashion version of him. His love was more… raw, because it was more like him, and she loved every bit of it.

He lifted his head from her neck, looking in her eyes, a lazy smile across his face.

“I love you Y/n.” He said right before he kissed her, lazily, still slightly out of breath.

“I love you too, Dean” she smiled against his swollen lips, his name sounding so right. “Can I sleep with you ?”

“Oh baby I’m never gonna let you leave my side.”

The two version of Dean might be made of the same wood, but they grow in a totally different forest, And the biggest difference ? Only one of them held her heart.

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