WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH KAEYA AND VENTI?? Like, of all the relationships I want explored in genshin theirs is the most fascinating to me. Do they know who the other is in relation to their origins? Are they both in the dark? Does one know and the other doesn’t? What are their real feelings towards the other person, not just the expressed ones based around their personas? Why was Kaeya left in Mondstadt specifically and does Venti have any thoughts on the matter? Are we gonna get a big reveal scene where Venti shows himself as Barbatos and Kaeya is like ‘AYO WHAT THE FUCK’? Are we gonna get one where it’s vice-versa and Venti loses it onscreen?
Does Kaeya know that Venti is Barbatos and is friendly with him regardless? Or is it to get more info on the Archon? Or is it to perhaps ingratiate himself to Venti in hopes of not fucking dying like literally almost everyone else? Is he completely unaware and if Venti admits his identity to Kaeya that will be yet another instance where Kaeya’s trust has been broken by someone close to him? Or will he lash out at Venti because it is heavily implied that the Abyss Order/Fatui/tbh everybody related to Khaenri’ah in some way hates Barbatos in particular for some reason? Or will he just go on as normal in hopes that Venti doesn’t recognize Kaeya as Khaenri’an? Or will he have a fucking panic attack immediately because bro I would too if one of the people who killed-or-worsed literally my entire nation just showed up and oh no he was my fucking drinking buddy?
Does Venti know that Kaeya is an Alberich and simply not care? Or is he pitiful of the man whose freedom was restricted at a very young age? Or does he feel intense guilt stemming from whatever the fuck he did in Khaenri’ah because SERIOUSLY WHY DO KHAENRI’AH-RELATED GROUPS SEEM TO HATE BARBATOS IN PARTICULAR? Or is he perhaps afraid of what Kaeya might do to his nation and hopes to get as close to Kaeya as he can to prevent anything from happening? Did Venti always know that Kaeya was there even during his sleep? Did he wake up and wander into the city and suddenly BOOM, DESCENDENT OF THE ABYSS ORDER IS YOUR CAVALRY CAPTAIN AND YOU CANNOT DO SHIT ABOUT IT? Does Venti not know that Kaeya is an Alberich/Khaenri’an and are we going to get a big reveal wherein Venti will once again be placed in a position where he might have to compromise his identity in order to protect the greater good? Or will he try to kill Kaeya because honestly if I took part in the mass-destruction of an entire civilization I would assume that if somebody reveals themself as a part of that civilization that they’re here for revenge? Or will he treat it like it’s no big deal because he already knew/doesn’t care because Kaeya has made it clear that he’s loyal to Mondstadt? Or will he collapse into a big puddle of guilt and beg forgiveness for everything that’s happened because, when you really think about it, none of Kaeya’s suffering would have ever occurred if Celestia hadn’t nuked Khaenri’ah? Even outside of the other bullshit, Kaeya’s freedom was restricted at a very young age due to the actions of Celestia which Venti played a direct part in. Does Venti feel guilty for this or like he’s wound up betraying his own value? Does KAEYA feel that way?
THEY DO NOT HAVE VOICELINES ABOUT EACH OTHER! Kaeya and Venti get them for such a menagerie of Mondstadt characters (including ones they never even interact with) that the fact they don’t have them for each other drives me insane. That HAS to be intentional, why the fuck do y’all not talk about each other when you should probably have THE MOST AMOUNT OF THINGS TO SAY ABOUT EACH OTHER?! They are making me crazy. LET THEM INTERACT AND BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER! WHERE ARE THE FICS WHERE THEY REVEAL THEIR IDENTITIES/LITERALLY ANYTHING RELATED TO THEIR HIDDEN IDENTITIES HAPPEN AND THE OTHER REACTS TO IT?? WHERE ARE THEY?? They are easily the most fascinating yet utterly unexplored dynamic in Genshin. I see more fics about Childe and Kaeya interacting than Venti and Kaeya and I get it and no hate BUT WHAT THE HELL MAN?!
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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)
i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.
i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.
and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.
HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.
now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.
my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.
i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.
by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!
keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"
similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."
the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"
if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.
the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.
godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.
the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.
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it's actually terrifying how quickly the concept of self care (originally a radical concept rooted in the black panther party's efforts to support other black ppl living through racism) became another tool of self-management which is viewed as both a moral obligation + an individual responsibility. businesses + employers + other institutions now easily wield it as a progressive way to say "if you're upset about xyz, make yourself get over it". "we are going to treat you like shit + you need to learn how to cope with that or else you're doing something wrong"
i have seen job listings where "ability to practice self care" was listed as a requirement for employment. as a case worker, we were repeatedly drilled on "self-care" as a response to unconscionably high case loads, traumatizing experiences, dead end job obligations, + poor living conditions due to subpar pay/high stress. my clients would go to appointments regarding their evictions, food insecurity, active domestic violence situations, etc + receive tips on "self care" without any tangible community, legal, or structural support to follow.
everyone absolutely deserves to care for themselves + it is useful to circulate affirmations + advice on how to do this. this should happen within communities, through a sincere concern/love for one another, as a way of helping everyone live the best life possible while we work towards total liberation. it should not be a replacement for caring for one another!!! it should be one of many ways of caring for one another!!!
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