#shouting into the void about my stupid characters from a game I barely even like

[cluescorner]

WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH KAEYA AND VENTI?? Like, of all the relationships I want explored in genshin theirs is the most fascinating to me. Do they know who the other is in relation to their origins? Are they both in the dark? Does one know and the other doesn’t? What are their real feelings towards the other person, not just the expressed ones based around their personas? Why was Kaeya left in Mondstadt specifically and does Venti have any thoughts on the matter? Are we gonna get a big reveal scene where Venti shows himself as Barbatos and Kaeya is like ‘AYO WHAT THE FUCK’? Are we gonna get one where it’s vice-versa and Venti loses it onscreen? 

Does Kaeya know that Venti is Barbatos and is friendly with him regardless? Or is it to get more info on the Archon? Or is it to perhaps ingratiate himself to Venti in hopes of not fucking dying like literally almost everyone else? Is he completely unaware and if Venti admits his identity to Kaeya that will be yet another instance where Kaeya’s trust has been broken by someone close to him? Or will he lash out at Venti because it is heavily implied that the Abyss Order/Fatui/tbh everybody related to Khaenri’ah in some way hates Barbatos in particular for some reason? Or will he just go on as normal in hopes that Venti doesn’t recognize Kaeya as Khaenri’an? Or will he have a fucking panic attack immediately because bro I would too if one of the people who killed-or-worsed literally my entire nation just showed up and oh no he was my fucking drinking buddy? 

Does Venti know that Kaeya is an Alberich and simply not care? Or is he pitiful of the man whose freedom was restricted at a very young age? Or does he feel intense guilt stemming from whatever the fuck he did in Khaenri’ah because SERIOUSLY WHY DO KHAENRI’AH-RELATED GROUPS SEEM TO HATE BARBATOS IN PARTICULAR? Or is he perhaps afraid of what Kaeya might do to his nation and hopes to get as close to Kaeya as he can to prevent anything from happening? Did Venti always know that Kaeya was there even during his sleep? Did he wake up and wander into the city and suddenly BOOM, DESCENDENT OF THE ABYSS ORDER IS YOUR CAVALRY CAPTAIN AND YOU CANNOT DO SHIT ABOUT IT? Does Venti not know that Kaeya is an Alberich/Khaenri’an and are we going to get a big reveal wherein Venti will once again be placed in a position where he might have to compromise his identity in order to protect the greater good? Or will he try to kill Kaeya because honestly if I took part in the mass-destruction of an entire civilization I would assume that if somebody reveals themself as a part of that civilization that they’re here for revenge? Or will he treat it like it’s no big deal because he already knew/doesn’t care because Kaeya has made it clear that he’s loyal to Mondstadt? Or will he collapse into a big puddle of guilt and beg forgiveness for everything that’s happened because, when you really think about it, none of Kaeya’s suffering would have ever occurred if Celestia hadn’t nuked Khaenri’ah? Even outside of the other bullshit, Kaeya’s freedom was restricted at a very young age due to the actions of Celestia which Venti played a direct part in. Does Venti feel guilty for this or like he’s wound up betraying his own value? Does KAEYA feel that way? 

THEY DO NOT HAVE VOICELINES ABOUT EACH OTHER! Kaeya and Venti get them for such a menagerie of Mondstadt characters (including ones they never even interact with) that the fact they don’t have them for each other drives me insane. That HAS to be intentional, why the fuck do y’all not talk about each other when you should probably have THE MOST AMOUNT OF THINGS TO SAY ABOUT EACH OTHER?! They are making me crazy. LET THEM INTERACT AND BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER! WHERE ARE THE FICS WHERE THEY REVEAL THEIR IDENTITIES/LITERALLY ANYTHING RELATED TO THEIR HIDDEN IDENTITIES HAPPEN AND THE OTHER REACTS TO IT?? WHERE ARE THEY?? They are easily the most fascinating yet utterly unexplored dynamic in Genshin. I see more fics about Childe and Kaeya interacting than Venti and Kaeya and I get it and no hate BUT WHAT THE HELL MAN?!

#kaeya alberich #genshin impact #venti #shouting into the void about my stupid characters from a game I barely even like #but LISTEN I WANT THEM TO TALK #I WANT THEM TO DISCUSS THEIR ISSUES LIKE ADULTS #OR ACT LIKE TOTAL CHILDREN ABOUT IT #OR WHATEVER IDC I JUST NEED TO KNOW #do they know? #do they not know? #how do they feel about all this? #I feel like they both know and are purposefully acting like they don't because that's a problem for future them #BUT IF THAT IS THE CASE THEN WHY ARE THEY JUST DRINKING BUDDIES?? #If the god who killed my civilization/the descendant of the civilization I fucking nuked showed up #I think I'd avoid them like the plague #BUT NOT THEY ARE DRINKING BUDDIES WITH ROSARIA??? #I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS #AND NO ANSWERS #BECAUSE KHAENRI'AH LORE DROPS ONCE EVERY BLUE MOON AND I AM A FOOL TO BELIEVE I WOULD GET ANY SOON

[jennikkugoesoff]

Monster

((Hi! I did this drabble to start feeling out some character personalities!))

((cw: Descriptions of Gore/Cannibalism, don’t worry nobody gets hurt, Light Horror, Lemon Demon’s in this, take with that what you will.))

"Keep looking. They've gotta be around here somewhere." Well, this had gone about as well as he'd expected. They were gone. Why had he agreed to help babysit the two most mischievous kids in town, did he really want to see her that much? Then again, this did sort of snowball into something bigger than he'd have liked. BF rolls his eyes and deeply sighs as he closes the bottom cupboards of the abandoned kitchen of the abandoned house. "They aren't here! I don't know where they could've gone, they just up and vanished!" he complains, adjusting his now-askew cap.

"They could've maybe just gone home. They're fairly independent for their age after all, and it's not like we're far from Lila's." GF suggested, peering into the kitchen from the open doorway. "They do know the neighborhood fairly well--" "Oh don't remind me, about once a week they come up to my apartment asking for candy." BF complains as he strains up to try and reach the top cupboards, just a little too short to reach them. "I-I've, had to start buying crappy candy regularly just to get them to fuck off." he sighs with a grunt, stretching his arms to their limits. GF chuckles as she walks up beside him and opens the cabinets for him, peering into them with him. "See, that's the ticket to this. You have to think like they do. Think about being a little kid obsessed with Halloween, where would you be hiding? They're probably snickering somewhere because we aren't coming up with the 'brilliant' hiding spot they have." she proposes, closing the cabinet after taking a good, long look. BF groans and rolls his eyes again, running a hand through his hair as he leans up against the kitchen's counter. "This is stupid. Why did we come here." he complains. "I mean, it was your idea, and I told you it was a bad idea." GF mentions. "Well you- should've- I-" BF defends, getting red in the face, before huffing and relaxing harder against the counter. "...Hey, don't worry. I can tell you're just worried about the kids. I didn't mean to drill you or anything. It'll be ok, we'll find them, ok?" she assures. "I hope so. I just--" BF's sentence was cut off by a sudden scream as he lurches forwards and starts patting himself off frantically, shaking himself off to reveal a roach skittering away after he'd knocked it off of the back of his arm. GF held her breath, but sighed with relief once she had realized what was going on, and, she couldn't help but chuckle a little bit. BF got even redder in the face. "Don't LAUGH at me!" he shouted. "What if that had been you?!" he whined angrily, his voice pitching and cracking. GF only laughed a bit harder. "I-, I mean...." she managed to get out. "I--" she tried to get out again, giggling it off. "I'm sorry, just, with how you screamed, I would've thought you'd seen a monster, and just--" CRUNCH.

The two young adults pause, and look off towards the source of the sound. "What was that?" BF asked. "...It, sounded kinda like-" CRUNCH. By this time, the gentle rain outside had turned harsh, the wind blowing scraped the overgrown branches against the windows. "...U-uh, kids?..." BF called out into the hallway where the sound had come from. ... Only silence. "Welp. I've heard enough, let's go." BF said, walking away. "Hold it there, sag-pants. You're not going anywhere until we find the kids." GF declines, grabbing her boyfriend by the back of his shirt and pulling him back. "Did you not hear that fucking inhuman crunch just now? It's probably EATEN the kids already!" he complained. "That's probably what we're hearing, the critch-crunch of their bones! Now let's not be horror movie white people and let's GO!--" he protests, trying to walk away again. "And what are we gonna tell Lila?" GF asks. "Oh, sorry, we left the kids in an abandoned house because we heard crunchy sounds that may or may not be a stranger, Skid and Pump are probably dead but at least we're still here!" she mocks with a faux-deep voice. "That ain't no stranger! That's a fucking monster!" BF protests, pointing off towards the living room. "Ok, look. If you're gonna be this much of a pussy bitch about it, I'll go and find the kids. You stay here in the living room." GF bites back, in a stern tone as she walks off. "Wait!--" BF says, stepping out into the living room, but it was too late. She'd already left. BF sighs to himself as she leaves. Well, this was a disaster. He'd put kids in danger and made GF mad at him. Or at least, it seemed that way. He hung his shoulders and put his hand on his forehead. He'd gone from starting to regret this to full on just regretting it. They were gonna be so disappointed in him, and even worse, they may have just proven how irresponsible they really were by hurting someone else's kids. Well, actually, someone else's kid and also another someone else's kid, but in a way, that was even worse. Actually no, scratch that, it was worse. Maybe though, maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Maybe they were just heated in the moment and everything would be ok. Maybe she'd come back with the kids in just a minute. ...Yeah! Maybe he could explain all this. Explain himself. It'd be the right thing to do after all. He owed her an apology anyway after all. That was sort of a shitty little bout he had just now-- drip. Something hits BF on the shoulder. It felt like a rain drop, but it was warm. Surely it was just the pipes, right? This... house was like a bajillion years old, please just let it be the pipes. BF looks up slowly, white in the face. ... That's not a pipe. BF's eyes meet with another pair. These are cetainly not human eyes though, instead, they were large, bulbous and shining in the dark, but had large, void-like pupils that stared right through the human. BF doesn't scream. He doesn't move, he's frozen to his spot, all that escaped him is a broken breath of fear. The pair of eyes, keeping focus on him, moves slowly and methodically to the nearest wall, before a black, clawed hand begins pulling the shape of the figure down the wall. The head the eyes were socketed into was elongated, wrinkled and bright yellow, like a lemon. ...Actually, it was a lemon. Another clawed hand revealed that the ghastly form was crawling down the wall, like a spider, a disgusting chittering sound coming from it as it moved, although it was unclear whether it was making the sound or just it moving was. BF just began to sweat more and more as more of this horrible thing came into view. It had a long, skeletal body, yet velvety, jet-black skin that just barely draped across it's form, it's joints audibly popping and cracking as it moved. "Whaaat the... fuu...." the human trails, as this thing stood up. Well, kind of. It was too tall to stand at it's full height in the room, so instead, it bent over where it reached the ceiling. Most disturbing of all though. It could speak. And it does, as it leers down at him, smiling wide to reveal a mouth full of large, slightly yellowed human teeth that sat crooked in it's dark maw. "Well, well, well, what have we got here?" it asks, in a gentle, uncomfortably soothing male voice. "You're a long ways from home, aren't you, little human?" he- it, said. "W-what-- who, are... you?..." BF stumbled, taking several steps back as this thing slinked up to him like a snake, pinning him back against the wall. "Me?" the figure asked, almost curiously. "I go by a few different ones." he explained, drawing away from him. "The thing that goes bump in the night, the monster underneath your bed, or in your closet, or under the stairs, the thing from which you run, the something wicked this way comes... but most people, you know what they call me?" he asks. "W-what?" Then, the creature lets out a very human scream. A scream of pain, a scream of death, and dread. Then, he chuckles. "It's an affectionate nickname, I think." he clarifies, the disparity between the horrible shrieking and his paradoxically comforting voice uncanny. "But, let's not worry about formalities, and let's get down to brass tax." "You're a human, and you're in my territory, and that means you're game." he explains. "Game?..." BF queries. "Game, to hunt." the creature clarifies, with a chuckle. "And it's such good timing too, I love humans, my favorite part is the skin, and how at just the right temperature, it so easily peels from your-" But ever-so abruptly, the creature's dialogue was interrupted by the sound of heels on wooden stairs. "Hey! BF! I just got a call from Lila, the kids did go home! Apparently they got distracted for a while and just, left? We can finally get out of this-" GF cuts in, as she stops about halfway down the stairs. "Oh. Great. It's you." she sighs, rolling her eyes. "I should've known you'd be here, you creep." she says, taking several paces down the stairs and walking around to their sides, pulling BF out of the corner and close to her. "Y-you know this thing?" BF asked, clutching his girlfriend close. "Unfortunately." she adds. "Ohh, ohohoho... Gwen, you didn't tell me you had a little boyfriend." the monster coos, as he reaches out and draws a finger underneath BF's chin, but the hand is quickly slapped away by GF. "Don't touch him." she warns. "You couldn't stop me, even if you wanted to." he brings up, looking sly, as he slinks away from the pair. "Oh what to do with you two..." he says. "I've always wanted a two course meal..." he almost, whispers, drooling as a huge, rancid slab of meat lolls from his mouth and he licks his lips, tracing across one of his bulbous eyes like a lizard. "Yeah, whatever, you ain't shit." GF fires back. "Don't tempt him..." BF frantically whispers back. "He's fine. He won't do anything, just keep him talking, it'll get his guard down. He thinks we're weaker than him. No matter what he says, just, don't be afraid, ok?" she whispers back. "'Ain't shit'?" the monster asks, almost offended, and holding his hand up to his mouth, before chuckling. "I think you'll find I'm quite the connoisseur of... heh, alternative cuisine." he says, bending down at the pair, his breath stinking of the same rancid meat that his tongue appeared to be... and vague hints of citrus. "Hm, what to do is the question though, I mean, your skulls would simply make lovely little soup bowls, from which to drink your blood..." he said. "Or.. hm, your bones would make excellent broth, wouldn't they?" he asks. "Light, sippable... although I must confess, your little boyfriend's torso would make an excellent roast, stuffed with your guts, left to steep in the oven for five hours... just, thinking about that smell.." he describes, drooling heavily. BF was shaking like a leaf, clutching his girlfriend tightly. "Aren't you scared?!" he hiss-whispers to her. "Watch this." she says, with a wink and a smile, as she urges him off of her, and she walks away. "Or, maybe I could put you both on different racks of the oven... serve you both up on silver platters, and turn your teeth into- wait, where are you going?" A couple seconds of awkward silence follows as GF walks back into the kitchen, and pulls something out of the drawer. "Hey, you know what you should serve up with a couple of golden-brown human roasts?" she asks. "A nice, ice-cold glass of... lemonade." she says, as she hold out her hand to reveal a hand-juicer. The monster's tune then changes completely, his huge eyes widen even more and his pupils shrink as he sharply gasps, scuttling into the corner of the living room, forcing himself into the corner, his disproportionate bones seeming to almost disjoint as he takes on some unnatural-looking positioning to mash himself further into the corner. "H-hey now! T-there's no need for that! I-... h-heh, heh, c-c'mon now, I was just kidding! H-he, he gets it, don'tcha?" the monster defends, gesturing to BF as he tries to cover his ass as he slinks back. "Ohh, but weren't you just saying you should turn us into roasts? C'mon, wouldn't a nice thick lemon-rum glaze go nice with that?" GF asks, stepping forwards. "N-no! No! It wouldn't! You've got the flavors all mixed up! Y-you animals! Stay back!" he warns, thick beads of light yellow sweat falling from his face as his wide smile contorts into a wide frown. "I-I I, taste terrible! I'm sour! I'll make your lips pucker!" he fires. BF, having been impressed by all this, decides to step in himself, walking up and taking the juicer. "Oh but it'd be so nice though! Perhaps afterwards we could use the leftovers to make some tasty lemon squares?... Or maybe some lemon meringue pie?" he suggested, smiling devilishly as he watched the monster's face get increasingly horrified. The now quivering-monster shrieks in despair. "Y-you better... p-put that thing down right now, y-you, you barbarians!" he threatens, his bloodshot eyes going completely red as he begins stalking up towards them, growling. "Oh it's so satisfying, the sound that a halved lemon makes... when you squeeze it." BF croons, pretending to juice a lemon, and stepping forward. That was it for the monster, he couldn't take it anymore, so off he went, quick as a flash, whimpering like a dog as he scuttles away, climbing up the wall, breaking one of the windows and crawling through it like a distressed house centipede. BF stands there, feeling quite pleased with himself as he drops the juicer. GF giggles and claps. "Nice job, Hannibal. Let's get out of here before he realizes he's several feet taller than us." she warns. "Yeah. I think I've had my fill of spooks for one day too." BF agrees, as they head toward the front door, hand-in-hand.

#my work #Friday Night Funkin' #Friday Night Funkin #fnf bf #fnf gf #fnf lemon demon #sm skid and pump #Drabble #Fanfic

[sassaetcie]

The Molten Charcoal (Idia x Silver fic) : Chapter 2

Enjoy this second chapter :) Please reblog if you like, or comment, I love to see your comments,,, 

I... went outside my room. The corridors were pretty chilly... I guess I should really go outside, huh. What if I spread the curse here, though? If some ice were to be born here, to be blossoming peacefully, or furiously, no melting would even be bestowed upon them. Only my flames would remain. Only I will remain... somehow. The darkness were soothing, though. They don't burn, after all. I should ask someone to use dark magic to boost my computers, lol. Nevermind. I didn't meet anyone, of course. All of Ignihyde's students aren't giving a shit, anyway. If we were to come across each other, we would both stare at the void and walk as if no one was there. My legs hurt a bit, tho. Less than in PE and after PE and the day after but still... I walked for a few minutes at least. Maybe I was just hungry... I was so stressed I couldn't tell lmao. But the corridors were so quiet and chilly... I'm just annoyed our colors are black (tho it's not really a color) and blue... Can't blue just fucking disappear. Hmm... if blue were to "fucking disappear", Ortho would as well kflgldlnf,. I'm stupid. He even called me some... time ago, I think? I should check the hour from time to time... What if I miss some event???

My "date" with Silver is in 6 days, probably. Why would he call it a date if he doesn't know I'm in love, though... I guess Ortho really saw through me and wasn't joking with my Prince Ideal?! Is he going to shoot Truth Bullet in my face and make me the only victim of this love trial?! Six days, tho... I'll have to see Silver... I've already met him so it won't be as awkward as the first time but... Do I even have the right to love him, anyway? I probably have, but I can't fulfill my lovey dovey dream, LOL. Even if he were to love me... Even if he is a Prince... That's the way I should behave as the future Shroud Family Head. I should wed someone of my "rank". But if I do, how many responsibilities will be pushed upon our shoulders? I can not just marry him, that's right. But he is still a "prince". I won't ever wed a fucking prince. Wouldn't that mean fulfilling my kin's wish? I don't. fucking. want. to. I don't want to be a Shroud. I am just... Idia... I am just Idia... And if the prince's ideal was just something I started to wish after what happened back then? What if I don't really love Silver but just love his aura? That's it, right... Sorry, Ortho, I really can't be in love with Silver, huh. There's no way I truly love. That's just another delusion. I'm just a stupid kid. I'm just a stupid adult. Whatever. This delusion is sweet, huh? That will last some time. And it'll vanish. I can't love a prince since it would be a Shroud's fate. I want to love the Prince Charming since I want to be saved. Couldn't I just love the sweet and caring senpai ideal?! Guess I went the hardcore mode because I'm rich and used to opulence, lol. I still got six days... I guess Ortho will knock my door like hell when the time shall come, anyway. That makes me going outside at least five times to be prepared... Welp, I'll just play some games and read the lessons's content Ortho has sent me. Lol.

[Started Recording at : 11 am : Second??? Day]

[May contain fragments and shattered data]

[The user has deemed preferable to let them be.]

-LET'S FUCKIIIING GOOOOO

-What do you mean, dude? ... trying my best. No... really.... serious!

The room next to Ortho was definitely reflective of Idia's moods. His shouting and screaming and screeching and howling were as reversed as his flame hair. He was not a bother when he let his voice ramble... He was not annoying either.

-I'm... best DPS! Y'all can't outrun my skiiiiiiiiills!

He was just acting so happily. His little brother sat on the bed he had been offered by the school, in the room the school had offered him, in the world he had been offered. The covered by some shades of blue, very likely azure, bed, was probably soft.

-GOOD GAME y'ALLLLL! I'm... play... See y'all!

-Huh? If I want to stay in the... channel? Sure~! What do... wanna talk about, though?

He did not need to go outside to seek happiness. They knew about that. His flames barely had enough sense in existing, and could erase all of the logic they were looking for. This story did not make any sense. Should this story make sense? He was a half, after all. This should make sense. But why?

-Yeah, WyverneCastel? I.... yeah... need... later. If you can, ... course!

The next lesson would soon begin. It was better to stop Recording right now.

[Ended Recording at 11:30 am : Second??? Day]

Tbh, I only had good games so far. No Internet problems (of course, since I usually fix them, NRC is so fucking slow when it comes to administration and solving problems LOL), no Internet problems for my team, no server crash... I kind of like to solve little stuff like that, to be fair... Like, I didn't really use to when I was younger. Well, until a certain incident, of course... Maids and butlers would just bring sweets, cupcakes, forêt noire, macaron, lemon pie, millefeuille, sachertorte, éclair, tropézienne, chou à la crème, mochi, dango, baklava, Turkish delight, praline pie, crepes, waffles... No matter how dark and clean their suits and dresses were, none of them were exactly identical. I guess that's why I could recognize them, especially when I was small... I guess my parents just wanted to show off by telling others their servants could have a slightly customized outfit, or some kind of shit like that. It would probably cost a bit more than regular outfits they could just ordered at the same moment... Just because they had money, the "bit" was staying a "bit". I don't want to see them again... Their blue burning hair, like mine... I fucking hate it. I can't even dye it. I can't dye it. I can't dye it. I can't dye... I can't change them... I can't change... I'm a cursed heir in love with someone who could be a prince but isn't at the same time. This story cannot end in a way or another. This doesn't make any sense, yet it does. Can it just be absolutely absurd? Give me some powers that don't make any sense. I want them. I don't want to be a Shroud. Welp, guess I'll go and check what Ortho did for the lessons. I'll probably go and take a "walk" after (that is, earning outside-resisting exp points to lvl up my skill).

Okay, so the "recordings" go as "The Seventh's history may seem simple at first, but do not forget that History is made by winners. They were the ones to win and if their people are living in, for the most, good conditions, it is yet to be proven that the means were as glorious as the results. If someone says something when speaking of History, try thinking about the opposite. It may end up interesting, although I cannot deny some FACTS exist in History itself, since an enormous sample of people were made to make sure that it was a "fact" and therefore, not a "speculation". Well, these facts could be denied since propaganda exists in our world, alas. But doubting everything will spread discord, and even lying can be used by leaders to prevent peoples from collapsing or killing each other."

Up to this point, I cannot say it's difficult. I mean, it's just almost a Civilization creative game, huh. I guess this is just the introduction or something like that, and that the "hard" part will come right after...

"The Queen of Hearts has made an abnormal lots of rules, for instance. Yet, her peoples did not dethrone her. Does that mean they like her? Well, this could be interpreted as "respect" from our point of view. But from someone else, they could actually fear her and fear the fact she has sent people to death. She held trials to judge them before sentencing them to death or other punishments, that is true. Yet, were that true trials or actually fake trials only meant to look like trials and fair justice? We do not have enough clues about whether she actually listened to mitigating factors or... . To keep going with this idea, ... also was judged when ... came to Wonderland. The trial was ... and yet almost ... ."

I'm not gonna lie, why the hell are there blanks? Ortho is always serious and meticulous. There's no way he can miss a single word. His ears are among the best of the world. I'm pretty sure he can fucking outrun all of Savanaclaw when it comes to earing (well, actually, he probably can outrun ANYONE since he's great). So if there are blanks... there are but a few reasons for that. Either he needs an urgent update, but this has NEVER occurred before since I've spent months to create a perfect calendar to never let him suffer the most insignificant flaw. Thus it can't be that. He could have been beaten up but that wouldn't make any goddamn sense. Who would even try to hurt him when I'm so neutral to anyone? I legit don't give a shit about what's going on in NRC. I'm not even sure I met the new student (if they're that new since I dunno when they have arrived lol)... This left me with two solutions.

Either Ortho was infected by a Virus, but nobody here has my hacking skills so it's very unlikely or... he has started recording more than expected and it's making its components slow down. I guess I won't have any choice but upgrade his memory next time we update him. The thing is... what the fuck is Ortho recording outside of our notes? He's probably doing something for my sake or...?! No, he wouldn't do something that twisted... He wouldn't!!! He wouldn't seek intel on Silver for my sake?! Go back Ortho! GO BAAAACK! You're a pure-hearted shota character, you shouldn't seek to change your condition or you may end in a fucking violent time loop! I don't think he's actually doing this... It would be weird for Ortho to act on this own on shady stuff like this. I guess he is trying to help me in a way... But what the fuck can he be recording... I'll think about it after checking the other days recordings. Maybe there weree already some parasite noises or something like that?

So, I've listened to the whole yesterday recordings, and even the one before yesterday (I just sped up his voice since I just wanted to be sure there were no vocal errors). I am.. pretty sure of it, now. Ortho did not have troubles until yesterday night at least. It seems it has begun during the second part of Trein's class, so it wouldn't be stupid to think that his memory is being more and more filled by "something else". I guess I will just ask him to only pick the key information and understand by himself what the teachers told him... It will take faaaar less room. I'm going to get out now, that's probably night. I hope it will be another chilly travel.

OKAY THIS DIDN'T GO AS PLANNED AT ALL. NOT AT ALL, NOT AT ALL, NOT AT ALL. I thought I'd take a stroll towards in the refectory since no one is supposed to be there at that time but I FUCKING FORGOT THAT NO ONE GIVES A FUCKING SHIT IN THIS FUCKING SCHOOL?! I even thought of taking some food if there were some leftovers so that I could award myself from getting out of my room (cause honestly walking is boring as fuck, I'd rather walk in Skyrim, at least I can hear my leather boots on the ground, lol)... Of course people would have been there. But when I got out of my room, the chilly ascension kept on telling me to move forward.  Everything was covered in darkness, to the point I thought my flames would become that of a raven, finally. I took several steps, no matter what the light piercing my skull did. The gleam may try to bath the corridor of their blue burning halo, there were too much potential icicles ready to kill it. I just wanted the chill atmosphere to let me walk, and somehow it ended up this way. For now, my flames were too weak to even absorb the ice before absorbing their waters. I wish for it to weaken to the point my sparks die. I want to walk on that silver lake too... I don't want to fly above. I don't want to sink beneath. I want... to walk on it. To swim through it.

Basically, by the time I got to the refectory (always fucking heavily decorated, like what the hell, luxurious chandeliers????), I realized I made a mistake. There were at least two potential people going there at least once a week. From the moment I heard their voices, this was too fucking late. Trey and Jamil were arguing, somehow? I didn't even think it was possible for these two to argue... I mean, Trey is the cool glasses trope and Jamil is obviously the tortured-but-actually-cunning-and-not-that-bad one. How could they even argue? Well, not that I knew if it had happened before. Cater could post a lot of stuff on Magicam (and yet that wasn't even shitpost...), lol. But I don't remember seeing stuff on Trey badmouthing Jamil or the other way round... Trey was the kind to avoid troubles at all cost, especially since he was under Riddle's influence... I would behave the same, tho I would never have been vice-dorm-leader lmao (well im already dorm head and it's already a fucking pain in the ass, thanks)... I tried to escape but it was too late... I guess that's what I get for playing with my burning curse. They asked me what was I doing there, though they probably were not surprised of my walking "hours". They seemed so suspicious of myself that it was not an ordinary situation. Usually, they would maybe have greeted me... That's all. They began asking me if I was the one stealing the food. Even if my answer was clear, even shaky, none of them would accept it. I was... after all... fire. Fire and water never meddled. Even if I pushed my body to repeating the same answer under different shapes since I may have had a bad locution... They wouldn't listen to me. At some point, I even told them I would find the criminal later and that I would just record some little things they would say to me before going back to my dorm, but they wouldn't even let me go.

-Well, you see, Shroud, there were supposed to be some yakitori, curry portions and blanquette de veau left. All of them disappeared. Although I think it would be hard for you to eat all of this, your health habit seems bad enough to let you eat nothing for several days then compensate suddenly by a huge chunk of food. Am I wrong?

Jamil wasn't especially agressive toward myself, though I know he probably doesn't like me. Who likes me in this ocean, anyway. They were not fishes like Octacreepnelle, but more of... water elementals, I guess. Or maybe barely humans able to seize water and flowing into rivers. They could merge into this part I couldn't access. Of course I would be forever different and... hated as such. Very likely.

-I am sorry to interrupt you, Mr Viper, but I don't think Shroud is the responsible. I know for sure he has a sweet tooth, and yet, most of the sweets are actually there. Except some of the biggest cakes, everything is more or less there.

I would have rather prefered Trey not to reveal my weakness to the enemy, but he was also trying to protect me in a way. Trey is probably actually more of the hero in disguise trope...! Just kidding. But up to this point, they had so many proofs and yet were clueless and even daring to choose me as the culprit...

-The culprit isn't me, isn't Trey and isn't Jamil...

-Heh?

-How can you be so sure about that, Shroud?

-E-eh... You suddenly rely on me so much... Guess I'm good as long as I can be useful, huh... But you won't let me go if I don't spit the truth so... Basically, all of the sweets, which are tiny and not good for health, are left. Then, we can conclude it's neither of you because you would have picked up ingredients, not food itself, or at least not Trey since he probably values a lot baking and improving.

-T-That's true...

-Then, that could be Jamil... But why would he come again if he already has stolen that much? And from what I know, Jamil prefers to cook because of some dark poison stories, right?

-Y-yes, I cannot deny that...

-Then, it is neither Trey nor Jamil. About myself, I try to stay in my room as much as I can, and I'm pretty sure Ortho only go to the refectory during the authorized hours since he is much more reliable than I am. But why would anyone steal so much food in the first place? If it were for one person, one or two dishes would have been sufficient. Moreover, let's say it again, the sweets were not stolen. So the person who stole... didn't pick up what they wanted by love of good food! They stole it because they needed it.

-Hmm... I wouldn't disagree with you, Shroud but.. I am pretty sure I got a letter from Jamil telling me I had to get here at 10 pm...

-Excuse me, Clover? Aren't you the one who sent the letter?

-And that solves the mystery. There is someone who planned on stealing food, knew that you were the only two going for sure in the refectory during night and set you up.

-Wait, who dares to do such a personnal attack against Scarabia?

-It is very likely that the culprit is... Ruggie Bucchi from Savanaclaw.

-Wait.. that would actually make sense...?!

-Especially since he didn't get a lunch earlier... I guess he planned on pleading for hunger if someone was to catch him during the act. And so he sets us up by delivering letters on different hours, and not by his own hands... Wait this level of intellect is almost that of Azul... Ruggie Bucchie is really cunning and... worthy of praise in a sense.

-Hm, that would definitely make sense since he is always the one to get the leftovers in the refectory before the holidays to help the people of his town. I did not expect you to be that useful, Shroud.

-Heh, you're talking to the one who solved Hinamizawa and Rokkenjima's mysteries on the second parts of each, of course I can do such petty investigation.

-Well... thanks... on the behalf of... Scarabia. I am going.

Jamil just left, but tbh I don't really know why. I guess he wanted some time alone before going back to Kalim. At a certain point of my childhood, I had tried to ask less and less to maids and butlers since they all worked so hard. They probably wanted some freedom too. And... I wanted to learn things for myself, too.

-Oh, Shroud, since you've helped us a lot... And... you've thought of how hard I work on my cakes... I want to make you one as an award. And it must have been hard for you to speak to us. Ask me anything and I'll bring you a cake, my best cake, when you want me to give it to you.

-H-h-h-h-huh? I mm-m-m—mean it's really nice b-b-b-but I...

-That's okay, take your time, I won't scream or shout on you just because you're different from others.

-I... I... thanks... Thanks... But... Shouldn't y-y-y-y-you be paid for that...? I mean, you're a kind of artist, and artists should be p-p-p-paid, r-r-r-ight?

His face certainly moved. But why? Was it on its own, or an order, a semi-order, even? I couldn't tell whether his mouth was smiling or if he was smirking, or the other way around. His limbs were linked like any of the sea-universe kin. So, if he were to makes any action, it should be on purpose... but that would be far too easy and stupid.

-Yeah, sure, but you paid me by solving a big trouble. Of course, depending on what you ask, the fees could overcome the wish I had, and thus you would have to pay a supplement.

I had already asked him about the fees and talked about artist respect. I couldn't possibly go beyond what he would offer me since I, for once, had gathered experience on this one, right...

-Please... Can I have a... I hope it won't sound weird... grey and blue cake? With some hard candies on the top...

-Wow! That's an original idea, I like it! Sure, I'll make it. Blueberries and hmm... I guess some white chocolate, maybe some Turkish Delight if I'm in for it... I'll try to make something unique for you! When should I give it to you?

-I-in... five days, if it's fine with you... I really don't want to bother you, you're already so nice and patient with me...

-That's okay, I'll bring it in five days to the Ignihyde Dorm! But the hard candies and the Turkish Delight may make the cake harder to make... Since you're a Dorm Leader and I don't want Riddle to have troubles with you, could attend at least one PE class? That would make up for it.

-Y-y-y-y-y—yeah, sure.

#twst #twst fanfic #twisted wonderland fanfiction #twisted wonderland #idia x silver

[thelonglazyworm]

[TKA Fan Radio Drama] Glory Professional Alliance Sports Meet (with translated transcript)

One of those fan radio drama from a couple of years back. It’s pretty fun~

Many of the voices actors that took part in this ended up officially in the animation for characters such as Ye Xiu, Huang Shaotian, Steam Bun, Han Wenqing. This fan radio drama is actually one of the reasons why they ended up in their respective roles. I really love the voice acting here!

Someone put up the transcript so I took liberties to loosely translate it here. Many thanks to Amsdia & Merlin for doing a quick proofread!

I was halfway into the translation when I realised that people who finished the book probably don’t need this translation. -o- People who are following the English translation of the novel probably aren’t familiar with half of the characters here. There’s also bunch of spoilers... Oh well.... You’ve been warned.

Translation:

Glory Professional Alliance Sports Meet

Chairman Feng: We are at the tail-end of summer, as the autumn wind rounds the corner. Thanks to the valiant efforts of the Sports Committee and the participants, the first Glory Alliance Sports Meet opens today! (Applause) Blah blah blah…...

  Wei Chen: Damn it. Why is Old Feng so long-winded today? He was never this bad during the pro-league prize presentations.

Ye Xiu: Yeah, it’s been almost an hour. Man, I’m about to be burned to death.

Wei Chen: What the fuck are you doing?

Ye Xiu: I can barely stand. Come on, let me lean on you for a bit.

Wei Chen: Get off. Can’t you see that I’m in the same situation?

Ye Xiu: Get Cold Hands to recover your HP.

Wei Chen: Why don’t you do that!?

Fang Rui: Hey, will the two of you keep it down? Have some restraint.

Wei Chen: Fang Rui, you shameless fucker. Saying that when you’re about to fall onto Tyranny’s side yourself.

Ye Xiu: Say, Old Han, aren’t you Tyranny people feeling the heat in all that black clothing? Who’s the designer? Does he hate you?

Huang Shaotian: Hot like hell hot like hell hot like hell hot like hell hot like hell hot like hell! Captain, don’t you think that the Alliance must be brain dead from the heat? What’s with organizing such a stupid Sports Meet before the competitions? That’s totally heartless and inhuman! Don’t you agree, Captain? Don’t you agree?

Yu Wenzhou: Chairman Feng has mentioned that the body is essential to playing games. Therefore pro-players also need to train up.

Wei Chen: Haha. Do you really buy that explanation?

Yu Wenzhou: Ah. Hello Captain Wei.

Huang Shaotian: Say, Boss Wei. How could you eavesdrop on others’ conversations?

Wei Chen: Bullshit, kid. Who needs to eavesdrop when you’re that loud? Didn’t you see Old Feng glaring at you from the corner of his eyes? [Pang Guang = corner of his eyes]

Huang Shaotian: Side glance, Boss, it should be side glance. “Pang Guang” is for pissing. [Pang Guang = bladder]

Wei Chen: Piss off! I meant “pang” as in side! Are you looking for a beating?

Huang Shaotian: Hey, hey, a gentleman doesn’t raise his hands.

Wei Chen: (hitting while saying) I am so raising them! Raising and using them!

Huang Shaotian: Sidestepping, sidestepping. Haha, heh, you can’t hit me~

Cheng Guo: (speechless) Seriously, that’s enough...

Tang Rou: Frankly, it’s a pretty daunting task for people who aren’t used to working out to compete in such sweltering heat.

Ye Xiu: Sigh. Should have applied for sick leave. I’m starting to miss the keyboard and in-game world.

Lin Jingyan: God Ye is sick? What illness?

Han Wenqing: Final stage of lazy cancer.

Everyone: Pft! (laughter)

Steam Bun: What? Boss has cancer? Oh no! When did that happen?

Ye Xiu: Steam Bun, you...

Su Mucheng: Shh. Quiet, quiet. The Chairman is almost done with his speech.

Chairman Feng: … And I hereby announce, the Glory Alliance Friendly Sports Meet, starts now!

  Pan Lin: Hello everyone, I am Pan Lin, your announcer for today.

Li Yibo: And I am Li Yibo.

Pan Lin: First up is the Men’s 200m heats. Let us put our hands together to welcome our first group of competitors!

Li Yibo: They are: Wei Chen from Team Happy, Huang Shaotian from Team Blue Rain, Xiao Shiqin from Team Thunderclap, Wu Yuce from Team Void, and Li Hua from Team Misty Rain.

Wei Chen: Thank you! Thank you, everyone, for all your wishes and support towards me.

Huang Shaotian: Boss Wei, please keep your shamelessness in check. Are you sure those cheers are for you? Take a closer look. See, those are obviously banners for Blue Rain!

Blue Rain Fans: Blue Rain, Blue Rain is the best! Blue Rain, Blue Rain beats the rest!

Wei Chen: Hah. It even rhymes.

Pan Lin: Ok, everyone is prepared and ready to go. And the referee raises his gun.

(Cheers)

Pan Lin: And with a bang, Huang Shaotian is the first to head off, as expected of the best opportunist of the Alliance!

Li Yibo: Right on his heels is Wu Yuce. Ah! And Wu Yuce has overtaken Huang Shaotian! He is fast!

Pan Lin: But Huang Shaotian is not giving up. He is speeding up, and it seems… That he’s shouting something?

Huang Shaotian: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you! Look, here’s my triple slash speed boost! AHHHH!

Li Yibo: Huang Shaotian sure is energetic...

Pan Lin: Ah, Li Hua is also close behind! And Misty Rain’s female fans are screaming their hearts out!

Li Yibo: Over at the finishing point, Dai Yanqi is waving her arms wildly, cheering for her team captain, Xiao Shiqin. Such touching team spirit!

Dai Yanqi: Good luck, Captain! All the best! Captain is the coolest! (squeals)

Pan Lin: And so, Wei Chen is the last of them! He’s quite a distance from the finishing line, it’ll be quite hard to catch up.

Li Yibo: Well, it does seem like this level of activity is somewhat taxing for the old guard.

Pan Lin: Yeah.

Wei Chen: (sounds of panting and slow steps)

Pan Lin: As Wei Chen gets slower and slower, Wu Yuce becomes the first to cross the finishing line! That’s truly rare athleticism for a professional gamer!

 (Wei Chen stops, panting)

Wei Chen: (gasping)

Ye Xiu: Say, can you still go on?

Wei Chen: Old… Old me… Is… Is just… Just...

Ye Xiu: I understand, I understand. This elderly one is proving a point~ Shall I call an ambulance for you?

Wei Chen: … Fuck off...!

 Li Yibo: Next up, the 2nd heats of Men’s 200m is about to start. In the order of their respective lanes are: Wang Jiexi of Team Tiny Herb, Zhang Jiale from Team Tyranny, Zhou Zekai from Team Samsara, Yang Cong from Team 301, and Zou Yuan from Team Hundred Blossoms.

Zhang Xinjie: You’re up, Senior Zhang Jiale.

Lin Jingyan: All the best! We believe in you.

Zhang Jiale: No sweat. 200m is nothing.

Ye Xiu: Good luck, Le Le. Aim for number 2~

Zhang Jiale: (shows the middle finger) Fuck you!

 Jiang Botao: Captain, do your best too.

Zhou Zekai: Mm!

Ye Xiu: Xiao Zhou looks like the kind who exercises regularly.

Zhou Zekai: Yes. Every day 20.

Ye Xiu: 20?

Zhou Zekai: 500m, 20 rounds.

Ye Xiu: …(awkward cough) Erm, go on quickly, the referee’s calling for you.

 Pan Lin: Great, everyone’s now in their respective lanes.

(Gunshot)

 Li Yibo: And the race starts! Zhou Zekai is staying put in the lead position and behind him are Zhang Jiale, Zou Yuan, Wang Jiexi, and Yang Cong.

Huang Shaotian: The hell? Does Zhou Zekai intend to run all the way with this speed? Good looks, great gaming skills, and this good at running? Heaven is being absurdly unfair!

Ye Xiu: Uh-huh, it’s quite unfair.

Huang Shaotian: You think so too, right?

Ye Xiu: Why are his conversation skill points all given to you?

Huang Shaotian: … You asshole!

 Pan Lin: There’s 50m left! 30m! And Zhou Zekai has started sprinting! He’s sprinting!

Li Yibo: Awesome! Zhou Zekai leads all the way and is the first to cross the finishing line! That was superb!

Pan Lin: Zhang Jiale also meets everyone’s expectations, doing a good job of taking the number 2 spot. Ah, he’s pointing his... Middle finger at me, expressing his current, erm, enthusiastic feelings...

 Ye Xiu: Take it easy, Old Sun.

Sun Zheping: Thanks.

(Ye Xiu turns, almost bumping into incoming Zhang Jiale)

Ye Xiu: Whoa! Hey, aren’t you too eager to see Old Sun? After all, Zhang Xinjie’s also in this round. You should put on your professional best to support your team, Tyranny.

Zhang Jiale: (gasping) Pah! As if you have any right to criticize me. Who’s the one that’s been going around all morning, putting a wedge among the rivals in competition?

(Zhang Jiale turns to wave at Sun Zheping)

Zhang Jiale: Do your best, Big Sun!

(A sudden burst of fangirls screaming among the spectators)

Fangirls: Zhang Jiale! Sun Zheping! One million years of Blossom and Blood! One~ Million~ Years~ [Blossom and Blood: their famous combo move]

Zhang Jiale: (shocked) What the hell… What is this!?

Ye Xiu: Just focus on watching the game...

(Zhang Jiale drinks water)

Zhang Jiale: (swallows) Sigh, I can’t tell what Sun Zheping is thinking. He usually doesn’t exercise. It’s a miracle if he even bothers to sweep the floor…. Hey, don’t spread this around. I’m screwed if he finds out I’ve been complaining behind his back.

Ye Xiu: No problem~

(Ye Xiu turns his head to shout)

Ye Xiu: Dear friends from Heavenly Sword! I’ve heard that Old Sun doesn’t even sweep his own floor! Send my heartfelt regards to your cleaning lady!

(Zhang Jiale spits out his drink)

Zhang Jiale: (coughs) Fuck, do you want to die? Don’t run!

Ye Xiu: I am off~

(Ye Xiu runs off)

Zhang Jiale: (shouts) Just you wait, Old Ye! I will get my revenge someday!

 (At Samsara)

Du Ming: This looks nice. This one’s also good. So hard to choose...

Lu Boyuan: Du Ming! What are you doing, acting so suspiciously?

Du Ming: Ah?! No...nothing in particular!

(Phone is snatched)

Du Ming: Hey! Give it back!

Lu Boyuan: Yo! Pretty lady Tang Rou huh~ Not a bad photo.

(Jiang Botao walks over)

Jiang Botao: Tang Rou?

Du Ming: Um.. Taken just… Just now during the Women’s 200m race.

(Swipes the phone)

Jiang Botao: Well, this one looks nice.

Du Ming: Thank you, Vice Captain.

Jiang Botao: What is it for?

Lu Boyuan: Need you ask? For his handphone wallpaper, of course~

Du Ming: Go away!

 Li Yibo: The morning matches have all ended. We will continue in the afternoon at 1.30pm. Have a good break, and we’ll see you again in the afternoon!

 Li Yibo: Hello everyone, good afternoon! I am Li Yibo.

Pan Lin: And I am Pan Lin.

Li Yibo: Welcome back to the live of the first ever Glory Sports Meets. You probably still can’t get enough of the exciting matches from this morning. Worry not, as there’s more to come!

Pan Lin: First up is the finals for Men’s Long Jump. In this match, we have our famed Glory Textbook, God Ye Xiu! A rare sighting indeed!

Li Yibo: That’s right! What else could be more exciting than that?

(Behind the scenes)

Ye Xiu: Say… Is it too late for me to back out...?

Chen Guo: Too late! Go, go!

Su Mucheng: Do your best~

Steam Bun: Good luck, Boss! Good luck!

(Ye Xiu is pushed out)

(Crowd cheering)

Pan Lin: Oh? Speak of the devil! Team Happy’s Captain, Ye Xiu, has just appeared on the pit.

Li Yibo: God Ye Xiu immediately strikes up a conversation with Sun Xiang who is also competing in this category.

Pan Lin: The two of them have a somewhat delicate relation in the Pro-Alliance. I can’t help but wonder what they might talk about before the match.

Li Yibo: Now that you’ve mentioned it, I’m curious too!

(Ye Xiu walks over)

Ye Xiu: Comrade Sun Xiang looks spirited. But are you prepared to admit your loss to this awesomeness in front of you?

Sun XIang: You…!

Jiang Botao: Sun Xiang, it’s your turn!

(Crowd cheering)

Sun Xiang: Hnn!

(Sun Xiang left)

Ye Xiu: Ah, that kid’s still as impulsive as ever.

(Sun Xiang aims)

Sun Xiang: Hng!

(Sun Xiang jumps)

Pan Lin: Sun Xiang’s record is a little unexpected… But to be able to jump 2.5m, it’s already not bad for a professional gamer, right? Yibo?

Li Yibo: Haha! That’s right. After Sun Xiang, we’ve now come to Ye Xiu’s turn. Fans here are pretty worked up right now! Ah, someone just threw a water bottle from Tyranny’s side.

(Cheers and Boos)

Ye Xiu: Fans are way too passionate. Oh well, with my overwhelming popularity, that can’t be helped.

(Ye Xiu walks over)

Pan Lin: God Ye Xiu is getting ready to jump! What will his result be? Let‘s keep our eyes peeled!

Ye Xiu: 1, 2, 3… Hey ho!

(Ye Xiu jumps and lands)

(Crowd boos)

Pan Lin: (awkward).....Erm… Ah…. This is a friendly match after all, nobody is a professional athlete. 1.9m is already quite good...

Li Yibo: Yes, yes… Ye Xiu is probably much better performing in Glory. Erm…. Moving on to the next match!

  (Behind the scenes of Team Happy)

Wei Chen: My back is about to break!

Ye Xiu: Don’t say anymore. I have a headache – it’s as if I’ve listened Huang Shaotian perform a crosstalk…. For that team captain friendly something-or-other match later, can I pretend I’m dead?

(Chen Guo jumps up and slaps Ye Xiu’s back)

Chen Guo: Of course not!

Ye Xiu: Oooh ouch ouch pain pain pain!

Chen Guo: Other teams have gotten quite a few champions! We have nothing except for Steam Bun’s win at discus throwing!

Ye Xiu: Sis, it’s just a friendly match…. Surely you don’t have to be so serious?

Chen Guo: Even if it’s a friendly match!

Wei Chen: Girl, you’re getting desperate...

Chen Guo: Shut up!

 Pan Lin: Everyone! We are now at the most exciting part of the day! The final match of this Sports Meet, the Three-Legged 200m Run!

Li Yibo: This is a friendly match where all the team captains participate together in groups of two. Each group is decided by random draw. Isn’t it exciting? Aren’t you looking forward to it?

(Crowd cheers and screams)

Li Yibo: Let us take a look at the final outcome of the draw.

Pan Lin: Okay.

Li Yibo: Blue Rain’s Yu Wenzhou with Samsara’s Zhou Zekai; Void’s Li Xuan with Hundred Blossom’s Yu Feng.

Pan Lin: Tiny Herb’s Wang Jiexi and Excellent Era’s Qiu Fei….. Oh? Who’d have thought, who’d have thought!? Team Happy’s Ye Xiu and Tyranny drew the same lot! Hahahahaha! This must be destiny!

(behind the scenes)

Ye Xiu: Are they trying to make a joke out of me?

Fang Rui: My, my! What a rare matchup! O’ Great Ye Xiu is lucky today!

Tang Rou: Do your best, I favour you two.

Wei Chen: (claps Ye Xiu’s shoulder) I truly admire the close relationship you two share.

Qiao Yifan: Captain, be careful not to trip.

An Wenyi: Captain, you… are really my idol.

Luo Ji: Captain, we’ll all be cheering for you!

Su Mucheng: I needn’t say anything. You know~

Mo Fan: Er… Good luck.

Chen Guo: (claps Ye Xiu’s shoulder) Get a hold of yourself! See, even Mo Fan is cheering for you. Do a good job and don’t tarnish Happy’s reputation!

Ye Xiu: You all definitely planned this together...

(Tyranny’s F4 comes over)

Zhang Jiale: Hahahaha! Serves you right! Karma’s a bitch!

Zhang Xinjie: (serious) All the best. I believe in the unspoken understanding between Captain and Senior Ye Xiu.

Lin Jingyan: (gleefully fanning fires) Haha! Me too!

(elbows Han Wenqing)

Ye Xiu: Wipe off that suffering look, Old Han. Do you think I’m happy? This is the fault of the ballot...

Han Wenqing: Don’t drag me down.

Ye Xiu: Che. That’s my line. Don’t you dare trip in the middle of it. Many pairs of eyes will be staring hard at you.

Han Wenqing: Same to you.

Steam Bun: Boss, you can definitely do it!

Fang Rui: Good luck, good luck~

Steam Bun: Good luck, Boss!

(Crowd cheers)

Tyranny Fans: Tyranny! All the best! Tyranny! All the best!

Happy Fans: Go Happy, go! Go Happy, go!

Su Mucheng: What’s there to fight about when those two are already tied together… Do the fans still want them to fight each other while tied up?

Wei Chen: Must be a sin...

Huang Shaotian: Captain good luck good luck good luck! Zhou Zekai, don’t you dare drag our Captain down!

Sun Xiang: For all you know, it’s the other way round.

Huang Shaotian: What about it? You looking for a fight? Tonight 8pm PK in the arena! Whoever doesn’t turn up is a scaredy cat!

Sun Xiang: Fine! What’s there to be afraid of?

 Ye Xiu: It’s real lively, huh.  Say, Old Han, let’s start with the tied legs first. Look at Xiao Shiqin and Yunxiu discussing, (leans over to whisper) I’ve heard all their tactics.

Han Wenqing: So did I.

Ye Xiu: Bravo, Old Han. Never knew that your heart’s pretty black too.

Han Wenqing: Hn, not as black as yours.

Ye Xiu: Hah.

 Li Yibo: All the groups have been announced and the team captain’s legs are all tied together. Everyone’s ready to go.

Pan Lin: I’m sure all the fans with us are as excited as we are. Let’s cut the chatter. An amazing race is about to start!

Ye Xiu: (whisper) It’s this leg.

Han Wenqing: Shut up.

(Gunshot, Crowd cheers)

Fans: Go! Go!

Pan Lin: This three-legged match demands synchronisation from both partners. And as everyone knows, all the captains are opponents.

Li Yibo: That’s right. Will they be able to overcome their enmity in such a short time and become friends?

Yu Feng: (impatient) Li Xuan, is the rope a little loose? Why do I feel like my legs are getting lighter?

Li Xuan: (panting) That’s because my leg isn’t even reaching the ground okay!?

Qui Fei: (cautiously polite) Senior Wang Jiexi, aren’t we being… a bit too cautious? We have only moved four steps...

Yu Wenzhou: Wait a moment, Cap’n Zhou, hold on! You’re going too fast, I can barely keep up… Ah… now it seems too slow...

Chu Yunxiu: (testily) Darn you, Xiao Shiqin, run slower! Mind the pace, the pace! Counting 1, 2… That’s not 1! 1 is the right leg! Right! You are using your left!

Xiao Shiqin: Sis, my left leg is your right leg!

(Fans cheering)

Li Yibo: Looks like this particular competition is of some difficulty for these long-time rivals.

Pan Lin: But the most unbelievable thing is Ye Xiu and Han Wenqing, who are in the lead right now! And they’re ahead of the current number 2, Yu Feng and Li Xuan, by almost 50m!

Li Yibo: That’s right! Speaking of which, they’re both nearing the finishing line!

Li Yibo: Go for it!

Pan Lin: They’ve passed it! That’s simply incredible! The number 1s are actually Tyranny’s Han Wenqing and Happy’s Ye Xiu, who’ve been bitter rivals for 10 years! Have they just proven that “your enemy knows you best”? This is crazy! The fans of Tyranny and Happy are also ecstatic! They’re waving the team flags enthusiastically!

Tyranny fans: Tyranny! Champion! Tyranny! Champion!

Happy fans: Happy! Champion! Happy! Champion!

(Ye Xiu bends to untie the rope)

Ye Xiu: Damn it....

Han Wenqing: (impatient) What’s taking you so long?

Ye Xiu: Fuck… Who was the one who tied the rope on us!? It’s a dead knot!

 Chairman Feng: To all the participants, referees, and people involved in this event. After a long day of intense matches, we’ve come to the end of the first ever Glory Alliance Sports Meet. Each exciting moment shall be a part of our memorable journey with Glory. Regardless of winning or losing, glory is forever in our hearts. Among all the blessings we’ve received, to be able to stand here together is our greatest blessing….

(below the stage, everyone is whispering/chatting)

Su Mucheng: Hahaha~

Cheng Guo: What’s so funny, Mu Mu?

Su Mucheng: Guo Guo, see this. Pictures of Old Ye and Old Han tied together are being spread all over Weibo by fans.

Tang Rou: That looks like the Alliance’s Weibo interaction with the fans, doesn’t it?

Fang Rui: Let me see! Let me see! Oh~ The photo’s pretty good.

Wei Chen: Hey, hey, this angle is a bit too….

Steam Bun: Woah, it’s trending like crazy! Boss, you’re a super hot topic~

Huang Shaotian: What is it? What is it? I want to see too, I want to see! Let me see! Damn it, Su Mucheng! Don’t you switch it off! Hey!

(ruckus)

Ye Xiu: Eh, Old Han. Maybe we should take a selfie of ourselves and post it up.

Han Wenqing: (black face) Go away!

Chairman Feng: …..and friends, thank you everyone for your eager participation in the Glory Alliance Sports Meet. Next year we shall continue to do our best!

  Huang Shaotian: Geez! It’s finally over~ Seriously, the Alliance organising such a stupid sports event. Pah! Zhou Zekai you bugger! Getting three golds for Men’s 200m, 1000m and high jump alone! Where’s the fairness in that? And that Wu Yuce, so what if he has long legs? What’s so great about that? And that Yu Feng! And that, that Bao something! I protest! The Alliance should seriously consider banning these buggy people from competing! Oh~ Right, right~ Old Ye and Old Han’s photo broke a million views! That’s definitely a headline for the next Gaming Weekly Magazine! It totally proves that what goes around comes around~ Heaven has eyes and you can’t hide~ Hahahahahaha!!!

 Ye Xiu: What is Shaotian muttering to himself over there?

Han Wenqing: His skin itches [for a good thrashing.]

 [END]

P.s, If you liked this, do check out another fan radio drama, 全职高手之全员闹微博配音剧 (TKA: Chaos on Weibo). Because that’s another awesome production!

And if you need a translated transcript for that (shameless plugging =P):

https://thelonglazyworm.tumblr.com/post/162012493344/

#the king's avatar #quan zhi gao shou #全职高手 #全職高手 #qzgs #fan radio drama #translation