#he’s the best of al’s characters you cannot convince me otherwise | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hanako-san · 2 years

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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime, books, movies or tv series)? Thanks....

I don't mind! I am very happy to share my favorite characters !! Although it is difficult to honestly choose one character for the TOP 10, but here is my list.

1)Amane Yugi Aka Hanako Kun(Jibaku shounen hanako kun) and Gintoki Sakata (Gintama)

There's no other way. They're both the first on my favorites list.

My boy Amane is a 13-year-old ghost that I love as such a complex, flawed character, and I can understand his pain so well. he can be cute.I love how his character has developed so far. From the boy who cared about nothing and decided to "go nowhere", he began to care, love life and want to stop to be with the friends he loves. This may sound a little weird, but if anyone has watched / read, they know what I mean.

Gintoki Sakata is the best shounen MC ever made. Nobody can convince me otherwise. I cannot describe him with a few words. @yonaks descended so well that I can only join her words.

2)Zeno/Hak/Jeaha(Akatsuki No Yona) Yoh Asakura(Shaman King)

Zeno is my beloved dragon. I love the whole group and have also mentioned Jeaha as my favorite dragon, but Zeno is the number one and the best and beloved dragon.

Zeno - He is the most tragic of all, despite everything, thanks to his wife, he learned to enjoy small things and passes all his joy and positive to the group, but also sometimes returns to his important old self. His power is also brutal. How can I not love him?

Hak - This is the best MC shoujo ever made. He may seem perfect and so he is a very OP, but in fact he is a person with many defects with good fighting skills, intelligence and a big, kind heart.

Jeaha - I like his personality and his interactions with his family and especially with Haku, he is like a big brother to everyone, especially Hak.

Yoh Asakura(Shaman King) - Yoh is my hero and he finally got a great reboot! He totally deserved it. He loves his laid-back attitude and being serious / angry when needed. He has opened so many hearts.

4)Yona(Akatsuki No Yona)/Tsukuyo(Gintama)/Lucy Heartfilia(Fairy Tail)

Yona - She is absolutely my favorite princess. She has a wonderful character development (like Hak), and also has a lot of kindness and can open people's hearts and change them for the better.

Tsukuyo - She is for me the best, most developed woman in shounen. She has learned to depend on others, she is not alone, she has so much goodness and kindness, and her relationship with gintoki is the best for me. She is incredibly strong.

Lucy Heartfilia - Lucy from a cowardly girl became a completely brave girl. I love her role and what I love is that she is the most vivid character (I mean, rent trouble). Also that it has (and still shows) amazing character development. She was able to oppose her abuser - her father, she had gone through many hard trials and proved that she was worthy and strong, and her strength was finally appreciated by one of her guild's strongest mages and she was finally appreciated - I admire her

5) (Our) Ciel Phantomhive(Kuroshitsuji)

It (Our) is important whoever has read the manga knows what I mean.

Ciel crosses so much evil that I am not surprised by his dark personality, he still helps people if he wants to. His personality is dark, but very interesting to me. I don't know how I should describe him ... He's just like a son to me.

6)Al Bundy (Married With Children)

Ed O'Neill he created the best male character of the brilliant Al Bundy (For me), I know he's a sexist and a shawinist (I mean Al Bundy, not Ed) for women, and I am a woman, but I really love and appreciate this character, I come back to this series many times and laughs and the most he makes me laugh the loudest , but I think everyone gave 100% of themselves there and they are amazing, but Al Bundy is definitely my favorite.

7) The Suite Life of Zack and Cody/The Suite Life on Deck

What can I say? I come back to this show often! I loved Zack the most, but now I love both of them.Cole played in Rivdale fanastically and this character is also my favorite

I cannot add any more images:(

8)Merlin(The Adventures of Merlin)

9) Shizukui Sui(Gakko no Kaidan)

I love this character because he is amazing. It is difficult for me to describe what I like about him. Probably that the hatred he carried began to gradually change thanks to the needle hero and that he wanted to reconcile with the person who hurt him badly because this person was for him like a parent / guardian for a lonely child. This J-Drama is my favorite and I often come back to this drama.

I must add that Kamiki Ryunosuke playing Sui is amazing and I love him as an actor and he is one of my favorite actors, he has played many roles that I love and it would really take me eternity to describe them all, but this is the character of Sui in which I saw him and my 1st drama so I have a special fondness for it.

10) Hero(J Drama) - Kuryu Kohei

Well, I love his personality and dedication to his work. He's a genius dedective, also fun. It is impossible to get bored with him

Unfortunately, this is how my list looks like this until the fifth place, and that's not what I said about all of them ... Ahh ...

Hope you like my answer and thanks for the asking!!! It's was a lot fun!!

#dnana-2809-blog #my answers

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mjvnivsbrvtvs · 3 years

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hi! so we have established at this point that you have A Lot Of thoughts about antony and brutus. but how does caesar (julius, not the little bitch octavian) play into that? bc like. my knowledge and impression of them is very limited and mainly constructed from watching hbo rome and idk. i think it'd be fun to throw caesar in the mix. love all the art and writing on your blog btw! have a nice day.

Hey, okay! So this used to be over 30 pages long (Machiavelli and Caligula got involved and that's when things got out of hand), but through the power of friendship and two late night writing dates fueled by coffee, I’ve cut it way down to under 10. Many thanks to the people who listened to me ramble about it at length, and also to a dear friend for helping me cut this down to under ten pages!

Also, thank you! I'm glad you enjoy the stuff I make! It makes me very happy to hear that!

And quickly, a Disclaimer: I’m not an academic, I’m not a classicist, I’m not a historian, and I spend a lot of time very stressed out that I’ve tricked people into thinking I’m someone who has any kind of merit in this area. It's probably best to treat this as an abstract character analysis!

On the other hand, I love talking about dead men, so, with enthusiasm, here we go!

For this, I’m going to cut Shakespeare and HBO Rome out of the framework and focus more on a historical spin.

Caesar is a combination of a manipulator and a catalyst. A Bad Omen. The remaining wound that’s poisoning Rome.

Cassius gets a lot of the blame for Brutus’ turn to assassination, but it overlooks that Brutus was already inclined towards political ambition, as were most men involved in the political landscape of the time.

Furthermore, although Sulla had actually raised the number of praetorships available from six to eight, there were still only two consulships available. There was always the chance that death or disgrace might remove some of the competition and hence ease the bottleneck. But, otherwise, it was at the top of the ladder that the competition was particularly fierce: whereas in previous years one in three praetors would have gone on to become consul, from the 80s BC onwards the chances were one in four. For the senators who had made it this far, it mattered that they should try to achieve their consulship in the earliest year allowed to them by law. To fail in this goal once was humiliating; to fail at the polls twice would be deemed a signal disgrace for a man like Brutus.

Kathryn Tempest, Brutus the Noble Conspirator

The way Caesar offered Brutus political power the way that he did, and Brutus accepting it, locked them into the assassination outcome.

Here is a man who’s built his entire image around honor and liberty and virtu, around being a staunch defender of morals and the republic

In these heated circumstances, Brutus composed a bitter tract On the Dictatorship of Pompey (De Dictatura Pompei), in which he staunchly opposed the idea of giving Pompey such a position of power. ‘It is better to rule no one than to be another man’s slave’, runs one of the only snippets of this composition to survive today: ‘for one can live honourably without power’, Brutus explained, ‘but to live as a slave is impossible’. In other words, Brutus believed it would be better for the Senate to have no imperial power at all than to have imperium and be subject to Pompey’s whim.

Kathryn Tempest, Brutus the Noble Conspirator

and you give him political advancement, but without the honor needed for this advancement to mean anything?

At the same time, however, Brutus had gained his position via extremely un-republican means: appointment by a dictator rather than election by the people. As the name of the famous career path, the cursus honorum, suggests, political office was perceived as an honour at Rome. But it was one which had to be bestowed by the populus Romanus in recognition of a man’s dignitas.69 In other words, a man’s ‘worth’ or ‘standing’ was only really demonstrated by his prior services to the state and his moral qualities, and that was what was needed to gain public recognition. Brutus had got it wrong. As Cicero not too subtly reminded him in the treatise he dedicated to Brutus: ‘Honour is the reward for virtue in the considered opinion of the citizenry.’ But the man who gains power (imperium) by some other circumstance, or even against the will of the people, he continues, ‘has laid his hands only on the title of honour, but it is not real honour’.70

Brutus may have secured political office, then, but he had not done so honourably; nor had he acted in a manner that would earn him a reputation for virtue or everlasting fame.

Kathryn Tempest, Brutus the Noble Conspirator

Brutus in the image that he fashioned for himself was not compatible with the way Caesar was setting him up to be a political successor, and there was really never going to be any other outcome than the one that happened.

The Brutus of Shakespeare and Plutarch’s greatest tragedy was that he was pushed into something he wouldn’t have done otherwise. The Brutus of history’s greatest tragedy was accepting Caesar’s forgiveness after the Caesar-Pompey conflict, and then selling out for political ambition, because Caesar's forgiveness is not benevolent.

Rather than have his enemies killed, he offered them mercy or clemency -- clementia in Latin. As Caesar wrote to his advisors, “Let this be our new method of conquering -- to fortify ourselves by mercy and generosity.” Caesar pardoned most of his enemies and forbore confiscating their property. He even promoted some of them to high public office.

This policy won him praise from no less a figure than Marcus Tullius Cicero, who described him in a letter to Aulus Caecina as “mild and merciful by nature.” But Caecina knew a thing or two about dictators, since he’d had to publish a flattering book about Caesar in order to win his pardon after having opposed him in the civil war. Caecina and other beneficiaries of Caesar’s unusual clemency took it in a far more ambivalent way. To begin with, most of them were, like Caesar, Roman nobles. Theirs was a culture of honor and status; asking a peer for a pardon was a serious humiliation. So Caesar’s “very power of granting favors weighed heavily on free people,” as Florus, a historian and panegyrist of Rome, wrote about two centuries after the dictator’s death. One prominent noble, in fact, ostentatiously refused Caesar’s clemency. Marcius Porcius Cato, also known as Cato the Younger, was a determined opponent of populist politics and Caesar’s most bitter foe. They had clashed years earlier over Caesar’s desire to show mercy to the Catiline conspirators; Cato argued vigorously for capital punishment and convinced the Senate to execute them. Now he preferred death to Caesar’s pardon. “I am unwilling to be under obligations to the tyrant for his illegal acts,” Cato said; he told his son, "I, who have been brought up in freedom, with the right of free speech, cannot in my old age change and learn slavery instead.

-Barry Strauss, Caesar and the Dangers of Forgiveness

something else that's a fun adjacent to the topic that's fun to think about:

The link between ‘sparing’ and ‘handing over’ is common in the ancient world.763 Paul also uses παραδίδωμι again, denoting ‘hand over, give up a person’ (Bauer et al. 2000:762).764 The verb παραδίδωμι especially occurs in connection with war (Eschner 2010b:197; Gaventa 2011:272).765 However, in Romans 8:32, Paul uses παραδίδωμι to focus on a court image (Eschner 2010b:201).766 Christina Eschner (2010b:197) convincingly argues that Paul’s use of παραδίδωμι refers to the ‘Hingabeformulierungen’ as the combination of the personal object of the handing over of a person in the violence of another person, especially the handing over of a person to an enemy.767 Moreover, Eschner (2009:676) convincingly argues that Isaiah 53 is not the pre-tradition for Romans 8:32.

Annette Potgieter, Contested Body: Metaphors of dominion in Romans 5-8

Along with the internal conflict of Pompey, the murderer of Brutus’ father, and Caesar, the figurehead for everything that goes against what Brutus stands for, Brutus accepting Caesar’s forgiveness isn’t an act of benevolence, regardless of Caesar’s intentions.

On wards, Caesar owns Brutus. Caesar benefits from having Brutus as his own, he inherits Brutus’ reputation, he inherits a better PR image in the eyes of the Roman people. On wards, nothing Brutus does is without the ugly stain of Caesar. His career is no longer his own, his life is no longer fully his own, his legacy is no longer entirely his. Brutus becomes a man divided.

And it’s not like it was an internal struggle, it was an entire spectacle. Hypocrisy is theatrical. Call yourself a man of honor and then you sell out? The people of Rome will remember that, and they’re going to make sure you know it.

After this certain men at the elections proposed for consuls the tribunes previously mentioned, and they not only privately approached Marcus Brutus and such other persons as were proud-spirited and attempted to persuade them, but also tried to incite them to action publicly. 12 1 Making the most of his having the same name as the great Brutus who overthrew the Tarquins, they scattered broadcast many pamphlets, declaring that he was not truly that man's descendant; for the older Brutus had put to death both his sons, the only ones he had, when they were mere lads, and left no offspring whatever. 2 Nevertheless, the majority pretended to accept such a relationship, in order that Brutus, as a kinsman of that famous man, might be induced to perform deeds as great. They kept continually calling upon him, shouting out "Brutus, Brutus!" and adding further "We need a Brutus." 3 Finally on the statue of the early Brutus they wrote "Would that thou wert living!" and upon the tribunal of the living Brutus (for he was praetor at the time and this is the name given to the seat on which the praetor sits in judgment) "Brutus, thou sleepest," and "Thou art not Brutus."

Cassius Dio

Brutus knew. Cassius knew. Caesar knew. You can’t escape your legacy when you’re the one who stamped it on coins.

Caesar turned Brutus into the dagger that would cut, and Brutus himself isn’t free from this injury. It’s a mutual betrayal, a mutual dooming.

By this time Caesar found himself being attacked from every side, and as he glanced around to see if he could force a way through his attackers, he saw Brutus closing in upon him with his dagger drawn. At this he let go of Casca’s hand which he had seized, muffled up his head in his robe, and yielded up his body to his murderers’ blows. Then the conspirators flung themselves upon him with such a frenzy of violence, as they hacked away with their daggers, that they even wounded one another. Brutus received a stab in the hand as he tried to play his part in the slaughter, and every one of them was drenched in blood.

Plutarch

For Antony, Caesar is a bad sign.

Brutus and Antony are fucked over by the generation they were born in, etc etc the cannibalization of Rome on itself, the Third Servile War was the match to the gasoline already on the streets of Rome, the last generation of Romans etc etc etc. They are counterparts to each other, displaced representatives of a time already gone by the time they were alive.

Rome spends its years in a state of civil war after civil war, political upheaval, and death. Neither Brutus or Antony will ever really know stability, as instability is hallmark of the times. Both of them are at something of a disadvantage, although Brutus has what Antony does not, and what Brutus has is what let’s him create his own career. Until Caesar, Brutus is owned by no one.

This is not the case for Antony.

You can track Antony’s life by who he’s attached to. Very rarely is he ever truly a man unto himself, there is always someone nearby.

In his youth, it is said, Antony gave promise of a brilliant future, but then he became a close friend of Curio and this association seems to have fallen like a blight upon his career. Curio was a man who had become wholly enslaved to the demands of pleasure, and in order to make Antony more pliable to his will, he plunged him into a life of drinking bouts, love-affairs, and reckless spending. The consequence was that Antony quickly ran up debts of an enormous size for so young a man, the sum involved being two hundred and fifty talents. Curio provided security for the whole of this amount, but his father heard of it and forbade Antony his house. Antony then attached himself for a short while to Clodius, the most notorious of all the demagogues of his time for his lawlessness and loose-living, and took part in the campaigns of violence which at that time were throwing political affairs at Rome into chaos.

Plutarch

(although, in contrast to Brutus, we rarely lose sight of Antony. As a person, we can see him with a kind of clarity, if one looks a little bit past the Augustan propaganda. He is, at all times, human.)

Antony being figuratively or literally attached to a person starts early, and continues politically. While Brutus has enough privilege to brute force his way into politics despite Cicero’s lamentation of a promising life being thrown off course, Antony will instead follow a different career path that echoes in his personal life and defines his relationships.

Whereas some young men often attached or indebted themselves to a patron or a military leader at the beginning of their political lives,

Kathryn Tempest, Brutus the Noble Conspirator

3. During his stay in Greece he was invited by Gabinius, a man of consular rank, to accompany the Roman force which was about to sail for Syria. Antony declined to join him in a private capacity, but when he was offered the command of the cavalry he agreed to serve in the campaign.

Plutarch

To take it a step further, it even defines how he’s perceived today looking back: it’s never just Antony, it’s always Antony and---

It can be read as someone being taken advantage of, in places, survival in others, especially in Antony's early life. Other times, it appears like Antony himself is the one who manipulates things to his favor, casting aside people and realigning himself back to an advantage.

or when he saw an opportunity for faster advancement, he was willing to place the blame on a convenient scapegoat or to disregard previous loyalties, however important they had been. His desertion of Fulvia's memory in 40, and, much later, of Lepidus, Sextus Pompey, and Octavia, produced significant political gains. This characteristic, which Caesar discovered to his cost in 47, gives the sharp edge to Antony's personality which Syme's portrait lacks, especially when he attributes Antony's actions to a 'sentiment of loyalty' or describes him as a 'frank and chivalrous soldier'. In this context, one wonders what became of Fadia.19

Kathryn E Welch , Antony, Fulvia, and the Ghost of Clodius in 47 B.C.

Caesar inherits Antony, and like Brutus, locks him in for a doomed ending.

The way Caesar writes about Antony smacks of someone viewing another person as something more akin to a dog, and it carries over until it’s bitter conclusion.

Caesar benefits from Antony immensely. The people love Antony, the military loves Antony. He’s charming, he’s self aware, he’s good at what he does. Above all of that, he has political ambitions of a similar passion as Brutus.

Antony drew some political benefit from his genial personality. Even Cicero, who from at least 49 did not like him,15 was prepared to regard some of his earlier misdemeanours as harmless.16 Bluff good humour, moderate intelligence, at least a passing interest in literature, and an ability to be the life and soul of a social gathering all contributed to make him a charming companion and to bind many important people to him. He had a lieutenant's ability to follow orders and a willingness to listen to advice, even (one might say especially) from intelligent women.17 These attributes made Antony able to handle some situations very well."1

There was a more important side to his personality, however, which contributed to his political survival. Antony was ruthless in his quest for pre-eminence

Kathryn E Welch , Antony, Fulvia, and the Ghost of Clodius in 477 B.C.

None of this matters, because after all Antony does for Caesar

Plutarch's comment that Curio brought Antony into Caesar's camp is surely mistaken.59 Anthony had been serving as Caesar's officer from perhaps as early as 53, after his return from Syria.60 He is described as legatus in late 52,61 and was later well known as Caesar's quaestor.62 It is more likely that the reverse of the statement is true, that Antony assisted in bringing Curio over to Caesar. If this were so, then he performed a signal service for Caesar, for gaining Curio meant attaching Fulvia, who provided direct access to the Clodian clientela in the city. Such valuable political connections served to increase Antony's standing with Caesar, and to set him apart from other officers in his army.63

Kathryn E Welch , Antony, Fulvia, and the Ghost of Clodius in 477 B.C.

Caesar still, for whatever reasons, fucks over Antony spectacularly with the will. Loyalty is repaid with dismissal, and it will bury the Republic for good.

It’s not enough for Caesar to screw him over just once, it becomes generational and ugly. Caesar lives on through Octavian: it becomes Octavian’s brand, his motif, propaganda wielded like a knife. Octavian, thanks to Caesar, will bring Antony to his bitter conclusion

And for my "bitter" conclusion, I’ll sign off by saying that there are actual scholars on Antony who are more well versed than I am who can go into depth about the Caesar-Octavian-Antony dynamic (and how it played out with Caligula) better than I can, and scholarship on Brutus consists mostly of looking at an outline of a man and trying to guess what the inside was like.

At the end of the day, Caesar was the instigator, active manipulator, and catalyst for the final act of the Republic.

I hope that this was at least entertaining to read!

#i cut out A Lot and its thanks to the patience of Friends that i got it down to the length that it is #like i cannot stress enough that i worked machiavelli into this and started dissecting the whole #brutus-cassius conflict with the framework that it was orchestrated by caesar #typically tho i tend to treat caesar as a symbolic device. a representation of something Very Wrong #this is a tag for asks

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hp-nextgen-fest · 4 years

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2020 HP Next Gen Fest Reveals!

The time has finally come for the 2020 @hp-nextgen-fest reveals! Thank you so very much to everyone who has made this fest such an amazing success! We were incredibly impressed with the overwhelming enthusiasm you all have for our favorite Next Gen characters. Everyone who submitted stories and art, and those who read, reviewed and recced: You guys are amazing!! It's been really great seeing everybody's fantastic creations, and we hope you all enjoyed the fest as much as we did! Without further ado, here's a list of all the amazing participants who worked so hard to create fabulous things for this year's fest!

ART

@miakagrewup drew AcciDental Magic [Rose, Hugo, & Grandparents | General] Hermione and Ron are called away for a case and left without their usual child-minder when Molly falls ill. Hermione’s parents step up to keep Hugo and Rose, in spite of Hermione’s warning that the two little ones have some big issues with accidental magic. The story is told comic book style, with illustrations and voice bubbles.

@eleonorapoe drew Woke up married! [James Sirius/Teddy | General] They get well and truly bladdered at Albus's stag do and wake up in bed together with matching wedding bands...

@mad1492 drew Sunday Practice [James Sirius/Teddy | General] Teddy thought that morning practice on Sunday was going to be something he would soon regret, but things may turn more interesting than expected.

@julcheninred drew Introduction [Albus, Severus, & Albus Severus | General] Albus Severus Potter gets to know the men he's named for by asking them about the experiences, memories, and motives that shaped their lives.

@garmrr drew Eyecandy [James Sirius/Teddy | General] After months of extensive Auror training, Teddy comes with the Potters to the beach. James. Cannot. Stop. Staring. At. Teddy. Shirtless.

FIC

@cassiaratheslytherpuff wrote We Keep Loving Anyway [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Explicit | 7.1k] After Albus finds out Scorpius is part vampire he can’t stop thinking about being bitten. He can’t stop thinking about Scorpius in general, but that’s been the case since he was fifteen. At least, when it comes to Scorpius he’s used to not getting what he wants. He’s happy with what he has, or at least, comfortable. That is until he accidentally asks for it, then it all starts to change.

@polly-darton wrote The perks of Veritaserum [James Sirius/Teddy | Explicit | 5.1k] James drank a long-lasting version of Veritaserum and is miserable and Teddy is having the time of his life. That is, until they’re both having the time of their lives.

@gracerene09 wrote Thunderstruck [Charlie/Teddy | Explicit | 2.6k] There’s not a lot for dragon tamers to do when stuck inside during a storm, but looking at this particular new recruit―well, Charlie can’t help but think of a few ways they could pass the time.

Quentin_threepwood wrote Hair Today, Hair Tomorrow [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Mature | 1.7k] Away on a book tour Albus Severus Malfoy grows a very creepy mustache, much to the horror of his still at home husband Scorpius Malfoy.

vitruvian8008 wrote Mission in Nairn [Draco/Lily Luna | Explicit | 7k] Lily Luna Potter is paired with Draco Malfoy for her first Auror Mission. On their last night, she decides to act on the lingering tension that had been building up between them.

@nerdherderette wrote No Other Alpha But You [Albus Severus/James Sirius | Explicit | 7.1k] Scorpius Malfoy has applied to be Albus' heat partner. There's no way James is letting that happen.

@aneiria-writes wrote The Scorpion King [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Explicit | 3.8k] Scorpius Malfoy, AKA the Scorpion King, has ruled Britain ever since his father turned his sights to conquering Europe. With his right-hand man and most trusted advisor, Albus Potter, Scorpius has a life of elegance and power. But he's had enough of the beautiful women that usually grace his bed. Scorpius has decided he wants something else in bed. Something more. Scorpius Malfoy wants Albus Potter.

@motherofmercury wrote Islands of the Upper Air [Lily Luna/Luna | General | 1.5k] Lily Luna has never liked her namesake, or her strange and sometimes absurd way of looking at the world. But a weekend full of ancient rituals and mountain forests is an eye opener, in more ways than one.

@shipperysails-bookofspells wrote Expecto Patronum!! [James Sirius/Teddy | Mature | 45.7k] James Potter had always known exactly what he wanted; to open a pub of his own, maybe travel the world, and live a simple life with the only man he’d ever loved. For years he waited, quietly determined to help Teddy see what could be between them. But just when everything he’d ever dreamed of was finally within his reach, it was ripped away in an instant. With Teddy missing, and presumed dead, James is left to pick up the pieces. John has no idea what he wants. He doesn’t even know who he is. But when he hears a strikingly familiar voice – on an otherwise ordinary day – he sets out to discover everything he can about the man that occupies his dreams. And Harry, well, Harry just wants to put his failures behind him. Until a series of unexpected events forces him to reexamine a case that he’d given up on solving. With the help of an unexpected ally, he just might find the answers he’s been looking for.

@lovealpenglow wrote lily's potter [Lily Luna/Lysander & Lily Luna/Draco | Mature | 8.3k] "But what if I keep it? What’s the contingency plan there?” She took a seat next to Lily. She spoke slowly, as if she was thinking about it for the first time, too. “Well, I mean, you keep your baby. You raise it. You love it. It goes on to do wonderful things because it’s a Potter.” Lily snorted. “It’s a Potter?” “Why not? I mean it’s just as much you as whoever is the father. Why shouldn’t it be a Potter first?”

@micheleblack wrote Snaked a Claim [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Teen | 1.6k] Everyone knew Albus was gay from age five when he would dramatically swoon every time Goncalo Flores the Quidditch player was mentioned. Twenty years later and Harry still tells the tale - much to Al’s embarrassment.

@ladderofyears wrote And I Fell Heavy (Into Your Arms) [James Sirius/Teddy | Explicit | 9.1k] When James Sirius Potter travels to America for three weeks, the turquoise-haired Healer Teddy Lupin misses his boyfriend very much indeed. Luckily, Teddy has (sexy) floo calls, charmed obsidian pendants and hastily made chastity promises to keep him busy. Based on the following prompt: Absence makes the heart grow fonder... Right? Smutty phone!sex? Longing letters? All up to you!

@veelawings wrote Dirty Duelling [Albus Severus/Draco | Explicit | 6.1k] Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want (Or — fucked up Dirty Dancing with wand fights)

@eleonorapoe wrote Albus’ Private Lesson of Sex Education [Albus Severus/James Sirius/Teddy | Explicit | 4.5k] Albus has some doubts about sex. Luckily he has an older brother, who can initiate him. How does this lesson go? James will be the teacher, Albus his good and obedient student and Teddy will be more than happy to serve them as a learning tool. In which a delicious Teddy sandwich is served.

@faeheyjesper wrote Four Reasons [James Sirius/Teddy | General | 8.1k] There were a couple of things James should've considered more seriously before coming back to work at Hogwarts as the new Flying Instructor. His dad being the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor there, for one. The fact that he hadn't really flown since a career-ending injury had put an abrupt end to his Quidditch fame two years ago, for another. His ridiculous, teenage crush on Teddy Lupin, his friend and Hogwarts' newest Charms professor, perhaps most of all.

@26timesbrighter wrote An Interlude [Lavender/Victoire | Explicit | 4.9k] Victoire is supposed to be chasing a serial killer, not shagging her uncle’s dead ex-girlfriend.

@drarryruinedme7 wrote Mint & Apples [Harry/Teddy | Explicit | 4.3k] Teddy Lupin's not-quite-wolf has chosen Harry Potter as his mate, that's all. He hasn't got a crush on his best friend's father, really. He also definitely isn't obsessed with Harry Potter's scent.

crazyparakiss wrote This is Love [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Explicit | 24.8k] Most of Albus’s bad life decisions can be summed up in a word: James. When he got a shitty tattoo in the Fifth Year—done by some bloke in a dirty flat—well, that was James’s idea. When he got picked up by Aurors for doing hallucinogens—James was the one who’d convinced him to do them at a party. That time they stole the flying motorbike Dad gave to Teddy—James was the one who insisted it was a rite of passage to drive it over London at dawn. Neither Dad nor Teddy was impressed with that explanation. Now, here Albus is living another bad choice that was born of James’s influence.

@gaeilgerua wrote The Balance Between Studying and Relaxing [Rose/Teddy | Explicit | 3.7k] Rose has been studying non-stop for her upcoming barrister exam. With Hermione attending Hugo’s Quidditch trials for moral support and Ron away on business, there’s only one person available to keep an eye on her. And Teddy is only too happy to take the role.

@r00wscribbles wrote The last ones to know [Albus Severus/Scorpius | General | 5.2k] Albus and Scorpius have a very close relationship. Everyone can see it. Perhaps they are the last ones to know jus how close they are.

@ohdrarry wrote You've Got A Second Chance (You Could Go Home) [James Sirius/Teddy | Teen | 16k] “What about James?” James, dear Merlin, not James, not again. His boy, his son, the brightest star in the constellation of Harry’s patchwork family, not him. “I think he’s relapsed.” – They tried this when James was nineteen and Teddy was twenty five. It crashed and burned. Teddy ran away to Finland and James... well Teddy's about to find out what happened to James, now that he's back two years later.

@maraudersaffair wrote Falling for You [James Sirius/Scorpius | General | 1.2k] Scorpius didn't care about Quidditch until he saw James Sirius on a broom.

@diligent-thunder wrote Heart-Shaped Ottoman [Draco/Teddy | Explicit | 6.3k] Draco has had interns before, but none so bothersome as Teddy Lupin.

@whenshereads wrote Living With Our Eyes Half Open [James Sirius & Scorpius | Teen | 5.5k] James didn’t mean to get his brother-in-law kidnapped alongside him that morning, but that is definitely what happened.

@shiftylinguini and @gracerene09 wrote Faim [Albus Severus/Scorpius | Explicit | 9.6k] "So, this is the city of love!" Scorpius declared, adjusting the straps on his backpack. Albus wrinkled his nose. "City of pigeons, more like," he corrected, stepping around another fat, grey bird Or: Scorbus go to France.

@articcat621 wrote Unexpected [Lily Luna/Pansy | Explicit | 1.2k] Draco and Harry's engagement party brings about an unexpected, but not unwelcome, event.

@fidgetyweirdo wrote Remember to Forget [Albus Severus/James Sirius | Mature| 17.5k] The moment they kissed, James and Albus knew that they'd never be able to live without this -- too in love to walk away. Years later, and well into adulthood, the possible repercussions of their relationship feel very real and very scary. Without the strength to break it off, they're left with a single solution: a company that specializes in erasing and altering memories. Now the only thing left to do, is to say goodbye.

#scorbus #jeddy #jalbus #pottercest #jorpius #scames #dralbus #HP Next Generation #hp next gen #harry potter next gen #hpnextgenfest #hp femslash #hp cross gen #masterlist #reveals #2020 fest #mod post

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fromthefishbowl · 3 years

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10 italian songs that are terribly horny

Kind of a sequel of this post I wrote about the three Italian songs every Italian knows without fail, here comes another in the same vein and, as you might guess from the title of the post, they all are horny.

Because there’s absolutely no need to title your fic about Nicky losing his virginity after a Hozier song, when the Italian music scene of the 1970s has already blessed us with Cristiano Malgioglio!

Beware that this list features: threesomes, implied choking, implied masturbation, lengthy descriptions of dicks, and a whole lot of “dying”.

So, if you’re new to the Italian music scene, I bet you now have two questions: who is Malgioglio, and why is that “dying” in between quotes?

Cristiano Malgioglio is an Italian songwriter who has been working in the music industry since the early Seventies. Now known mostly for his flamboyant style and white strand of hair in his otherwise completely black head, he was a close friend of Fabrizio de Andrè, who was actually the one who introduced him to the music world. He has written a lot of songs that are LGBT+ themed and has always been very open about his sexuality, to the point that he has never even felt the need of coming-out. Out of the ten songs here presented, he has written three of them, and one of them is about one of his boyfriends.

As the censorship didn’t allow for song lyrics to be too explicit, songwriters and singers had found a way around it: rather than saying “coming” or “orgasming”, they would go with “dying”, which was a lot more elegant and could be inserted in literally every song without the censors being able to complain. And, trust me, there’s a lot of dying.

Here is the list, from the least horny to the most horny.

Chi Non Lavora (1970), by Adriano Celentano

Link to lyrics and translation here.

Commonly called Autunno Caldo (Hot Autumn), the workers strike that begun in 1969 and dragged itself into the August 1970 greatly influenced this piece (but for all the wrong reasons). Workers were demanding safer working conditions, which had been completely ignored up until that point. As the days went on and the more people joined the protests, the police got more and more violent, to the point that they had begun shooting people on sight. This caused a huge uproar from the protestors, and when the voice that people had been shot and harmed by the law enforcement, even more workers and even students joined the fight. Through a year of strikes, they forced the Italian government to create a new set of laws that would protect both workers and students.

The song mocks this movement: the singer complains about the fact that, since he is on a strike two days out of three, he cannot give his wife enough money and therefore she’s going on a strike too and won’t have sex with him. Basically this song is nothing but the woes of a privileged, extremely wealthy man who thinks that people protesting for the rights of a safe work environment is inopportune and stupid.

The only reason why I included this song is because “Chi non lavora non fa l’amore” (Those who don’t work don’t make love) is still very much used to this day. If you want a piece of media that actually explores the protests and the work environment of the time, I suggest watching La Classe Operaia va in Paradiso (The Working Class goes to Heaven), a movie from 1971.

10 Ragazze per Me (1969), by Lucio Battisti

Link to lyrics and translation here.

Lucio Battisti is a national treasure and if I’ll ever do more of these, he’s surely going to end up in more of them. Whereas De Andrè would write more traditional music and focus on the lyrics, Battisti’s music was a lot more danceable and his lyrics a lot lighter, usually focusing on loneliness and heartbreaks rather than social issues.

In this song, the protagonist is bragging about how he wants ten girls for himself, all for different reasons (one because she knows how to dance, the other because she’s a virgin, that other one because she has been with everybody but him). It is soon revealed, however, that the only reason why he’s doing it is because he’s still thinking about a very specific girl who broke his heart.

Remembering the note above, peep that “And red lips to die upon”.

Gelato al Cioccolato (1979), by Pupo

Link to lyrics and translation here.

First song written by Cristiano Malgioglio and also the one about his ex! And yes, it was sung by another man, but... oh, well. The lyrics are the same.

I feel like the only thing I need to say, about this song, is to quote it directly: “Chocolate ice cream, sweet and a little salty”. And that’s it, because the subtext is right there and it’s impossible to miss what it implies.

What I think should be added is the fact that the singer had absolutely no idea of what the song was about. Like none. It was only in 2007 that Malgioglio told him that he had been inspired to write it after spending a torrid summer in Tunisia, where he had gotten a boyfriend with whom he’d often get ice cream.

Carlo Martello Ritorna dalla Battaglia di Poitiers (1967), by Fabrizio de Andrè

Link to lyrics and translation here.

Translating this song absolutely murdered me: Paolo Villaggio, one of De Andrè’s best friends and an extremely important figure in Italian entertainment history, wrote it to play over Middle Ages sounding music, so the words chosen and the way sentences are structured are reminiscing of that time, and it was incredibly hard to find English words that matched.

This said, it’s possibly one of De Andrè’s most light-hearted songs (probably because he and Villaggio wrote it while their wives were giving birth to their sons), even if it does mention social issues.

King Charles Martel comes home from Poitiers but has lost the key to his wife’s chastity cage, so he doesn’t even go home before looking for another girl that can quench his thirst. He sees a beautiful maiden taking a bath and, seduced, convinces her to have sex with him. It is only when he has finished that she reveals that she’s actually a prostitute and now he has to pay her, but he runs away before doing so (but still after having complained about the rising prices).

The lyrics of this song were censored and fought against by the censorship so much that, even to this day, records with the uncensored version are extremely difficult to find.

Una Carezza in un Pugno (1968), by Adriano Celentano

Lyrics and translation here.

Yes, another Celentano song. I don’t like him either, it’s just that we cannot get rid of him for some reason.

Anyways, here we begin to get into hotter waters, as this song is about a man asking his girlfriend to think of him while she masturbates. Of course, since he cannot be left out of the question, he will think of her while he jerks off too.

Basically, unlike what a first read might make you think, the “fist” he makes while thinking of her is not because he wants to beat her up.

Il Triangolo (1978), by Renato Zero

Lyrics and translation here.

Renato Zero is another extremely flamboyant personality of the Italian music scene, and “Il Triangolo” is one of the songs of his that are best known.

As the title may suggest, this song is about a threesome. The protagonist goes on a date with their boyfriend and finds out that he has brought a second man, with the intention of convincing said protagonist to have a threesome. Although at first they need a little convincing, the protagonist then agrees to it and finds out they enjoy it a lot, to the point of coming to the conclusion that “Geometry is not a crime”!

Kobra (1980), by Donatella Rettore

Lyrics and translation here.

This song is about dicks, there’s no way around it and there’s nothing else to say. The singer sees a certain man and thinks about his dick, getting wet and fantasizing about the many things she could do with said dick. That’s it.

Pensiero Stupendo (1978), by Patty Pravo

Lyrics and translations here.

Second threesome song!

Unlike “Il Triangolo”, this song is a lot more subtle. It’s clear what the singer is talking about, but the lyrics are not as on the nose and leave more to the audience to feel it, rather than hearing it through words.

The song begins with the three people part of the threesome that are already doing it, and are still doing it by the time the song ends. It’s not about the act in and on itself, but more about the sensations it brings.

Ancora ancora ancora (1978), by Mina

Lyrics and translation here.

Second song written by Malgioglio!

Mina is probably one of the best known Italian singers, as her voice is said to be one of the best in recorded history and has an impressive rage of three octaves, so it really says something, the fact that this piece is so difficult that even her voice broke while holding a note (in an incredible way that only gives it character, but still).

The lyrics play with the fact that in Italian the word “ancora” can be translated and understood as “still”, “again”, and “more”. I couldn’t really give it justice in the translation, but it’s as if she was saying “Your hands still”, “Your hands again”, and “More of your hands” at the same time, and this kind of logic is repeated for every “ancora” she sings.

Even if the lyrics are suggestive, what was censored in this case was the video (the one linked with the song), as the close shots of the singer’s face, and especially of her mouth, were considered to be too sensual to be freely aired.

L’importante è Finire (1975), by Mina

Lyrics and translation here.

Third and last piece written by Malgioglio!

The story behind this song is a little nebulous, but I have read that apparently Malgioglio wrote it for Dori Ghezzi, De Andrè’s wife, but that that project never came to life and, in the meantime, he had managed to meet Mina, and had tried to get her to sing it. But... not sure if this story is directly related to the song in question or not.

Anyways, even for this piece it’s impossible to escape it’s meaning, to the point that, even if it didn’t contain any forbidden words, it was censored anyways for weeks, forbidding radios to air it and Mina to sing it on TV. However, people were so eager to listen to it that it still managed to climb the charts and was, eventually, allowed on air.

#italian sources #italian songs #sources for tog writers

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hyunrun · 4 years

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Dream SMP/Batfam

This is my reasoning for connections between Dream SMP members and the Bats. This was all just for fun, but feel free to give feedback if you’d like! And do say if I’ve made a mistake. I haven’t done everyone, so if there’s anyone else you’d like me to do, lemme know! Please read, I spent a good while on this :D

Batman (Bruce Wayne)/Technoblade: Technoblade's Dream SMP origin story starts with his parents dying, so the backstory fits. He swears to kill all orphans because of the way they killed his parents (Similar to the way Bruce wanted to stop crime from running rampant in Gotham). Techno is also, technically, an orphan as Bruce was. I've always imagined Bruce's voice to be kinda like Techno's, especially that monotone tone he uses, and especially when he's Batman and not Bruce Wayne. Bruce Wayne is -Bat-man and Technoblade is a pig, need I elaborate? Both of them seem to stay up till ungodly times of the day, and I'm sure their sleep schedules are never on the same clock as anyone else's, Bruce's because of his vigilante lifestyle and Techno because... well, he's a Minecraft YouTuber. Both of them have a father figure, although not biological. They also have a friendly rivalry with a fellow content creator/hero (Cough Dream/Superman cough). We say Dick/Wilbur is dramatic, but you can't possibly mean to tell me Batman/Technoblade isn’t subtly more dramatic. They practically invented being dramatic in their respective businesses.

Alfred Pennyworth/Philza Minecraft: Is the father figure to Batman/Technoblade. Is really a force of chaos but everyone pictures them as a soft, loving dad because we all have parental issues and we need more father figures. Both of them are very badass in their own ways. Old and British. Here's a parallel I thought was pretty cool. Philza had been building up his hardcore world for 5 years before he died. It was like his home disappeared in front of his eyes as he fell away from his life. I'm not sure which continuity/arc this is from (Please do not hate on me, I am but a small child) bUT I do know that Alfred died of a heart attack/stroke at the same time the Wayne Manor was destroyed. His home was destroyed as he died. Just as Philza's had been.

Damian Wayne/TommyInnit: Is never really loved by anyone at first glance (From the fandoms). Tommy's the loud, annoying one, Damian's the grouchy, haughty one. But everyone eventually gravitates towards their characters later on. Their families were wary of them at first but grew to love them. Both of them are the youngest, and generally angriest child. Both are not American, Tommy being British and Damian, Arabic. They both have ICONIC mothers. MotherInnit is a queen, we all know this. If she can handle Tommy, she can handle absolutely anything. Talia Al Ghul has a reputation of her own right, and while she hasn't quite the pristine repertoire, she definitely strikes a strong mark on people. Now, this is a dumb connection between the two, but hair!! Tommy’s seems nice and floofy while Damian's is generally drawn spiky, and I think that's a cool contrast. Their love for pets is also important to note. Tommy's the one that's known for starting wars over the deaths of his pets, and it's easy to know that Damian wouldn't hesitate to hurt someone if they did anything to Titus or Batcow. It’s been shown on multiple occasions that he loves his pets a lot.

Jon Kent/Tubbo_: Best friends with Tommy/Damian. Do not try to argue that Jon and Damian aren't best friends because come onnn. And PLEASE do not take this as a dumb excuse to ship Tommy and Tubbo, as I know people ship Dami and Jon. Both are the embodiment of chaos wrapped in kindness, and both are definitely the more stable of their friendship with the other gremlin children. I am confident that both would probably refer to their parents as mother and father dearest. You cannot convince me otherwise. Tubbo has already done so, and Jon would never disrespect his parents, so this would obviously be the next best alternative for when he is upset by them. Jon’s powers fluctuate upon shifts in emotion and he can’t really control his powers, like the shifting of Tubbo’s alter egos. We never know when Toob or Big Law will creep out of the shadows.

Dick Grayson/Wilbur Soot: (Second) most dramatic in the family, though perceived as the drama queen because of their boisterous personalities. The one that was probably a theatre kid in school. The lighthearted one that keeps everyone cheerful, but also the one with the easiest path to a horrid descent into madness. They have a flair for drama, the glitter and sparkles to Batman/Technoblade’s sombre smoke and haze, which is why they work together so well. The closest family member to Tommy/Damian. Their little brother/big brother dynamics are just impeccable. Both are the most simped for by their respective fanbases (from what I’ve seen). The token pretty boys. Both artistically talented in different ways, with Wilbur’s music and Dick’s acrobatic skills. Also the ones that get constantly shipped with every woman they literally even look at. They also express their dramatic tendencies through their clothes, Dick with his jazzy Discowing suit and Wilbur’s dramatic L’manburg outfit.

Superman/Dream: The OP gods, need I say more? Friendly rivals with Technoblade/Batman. Very often perceived as ‘Perfect’ which they are not, but many refuse to accept that. A funny parallel I drew was the fact that both of them are famous in their own rights, but can just walk around and not get recognised despite millions of people knowing their online/superhero identities. Both are technically not human.

Stephanie (Batgirl/Spoiler)/Sapnap: Both of their names start with S! Not my only reasoning, but I’ll take it into account anyway. Both are basic looking in my head (Blue eyes blonde hair for Steph?? There’s at least 3 other girls that look EXACTLY like her in the nearby DC universes. And Sapnap blends in with every other white boy, though I love him regardless.) but both also have immaculate personalities to make up for it. They’re the most normal people out of all their co-streamers/superheroes in my eyes, also my favourites. (I didn’t realise as I put them together that I loved them most but here we are). They’re both great at dumb banter. They don’t have huge, hilarious bits often or any constant jokes that are pulled on time and time again, but their general atmosphere makes everything seem like a joke. They may not be the best at what they do in their friend groups but are actually really good nonetheless and do not get due credit for their effort and talent sometimes. Has a warring relationship with Damian/Tommy (Sapnap over the pets and Steph and Dami didn’t have the most friendly relationship at the start)

Jason/BBH- Same but opposite but same. Exists to cause chaos. I wouldn’t have associated these two with each other till the Badlands became a thing… but then the Badlands became a thing and I had to. Now, I know that technically Bad doesn’t have a grudge against Techno, but Jason would totally set up a whole empire just to mess with Bruce’s plans, just to get in the way, to instigate, to fan the flames of the fire till he’s driven Bruce to his breaking point. Bad isn’t exactly trying to do that, but he’s only around for the chaos. He’s only here for his own benefit, and he’s only here for that because of the hurt caused to him by the nation he came from. A parallel being Jason causing havoc because of the pain Bruce caused him. Besides, both have a cool red and black colour scheme, and both wear jacket!! Both are also technically not alive (If we're considering BBH as a demon).

Roy Harper/Skeppy: I have absolutely no explanation for this, but it just Fits. Besides, they have cool opposing colour schemes and are best friends with BBH/Jason!!

Aaaand last but not least

Jason/Technoblade: Now you must be thinking But Kaly you already spoke about them! And yes, I did, and they do go really well with their respective characters but I couldn’t simply ignore the connection between these two, so I thought I might as well write about it. Technoblade was an English major (If I remember correctly) before he dropped out to pursue his youtube career. Jason, though this may not be a well-known fact, was a definite literature nerd at school before he met his demise. Their cut off education in English is an interesting parallel to me. Both of them also have destructive tendencies, with Technoblade being an anarchist and Jason periodically running an underground empire to make sure he can do whatever the hell he wants to. They don’t generally care who they hurt on their way to reach their end goal. Jason’s reckless shooting and killing clearly shows this, as he continuously justifies his actions by saying he’s ending crime rather than just making it wait in line for its turn to pop up again, while Technoblade’s release of the withers and excessive use of his firework crossbow clearly shows that the deaths of the residents of L’manburg do not matter to him as long as he abolishes the government.

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maxwell-grant · 3 years

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Ever read or heard of Al Ewing's El Sombra trilogy?

So now that I actually finished Pax Omega I can give my thoughts on the trilogy. In short: I like it! It's got a lot of incredible strengths and interesting takes on the material it pulls from, it's got a very rich setting and interesting characters to explore, in terms of what else I've read from Al Ewing's general work it's second only to Immortal Hulk for me. This trilogy may have actually convinced me that steampunk has at least some value as something other than obnoxious set dressing, and that is no small feat.

I got a separate post planned for El Sombra as a character because I want to write about his character arc and the trilogy's relation to his respective influences, but below are my particular thoughts on the books. Spoilers below the cut

El Sombra is easily the simplest of the three, and the most straightforward "pulp" novel of the three. For the most part it's 200+ pages dedicated to establishing the misery of Pasito, the vileness of the Nazis, and the character of El Sombra as he hacks his way through whatever bastards he can get his hands on. It has to do a lot of work in making sure we fully understand El Sombra's character before the next novels can get to work putting him on bigger settings in a supporting role, and in that it succeeds very well. It's a Zorro character stuck in a 2000 AD world of dystopian mechanized nightmares and fighting savagely to kill it, gradually learning that he needs more than just a sword and superhuman skills to do it.

One thing that sticks out to me about El Sombra is how grueling of a read it can be, especially in the first two chapters when the story's establishing the situation of Pasito nine years after the wedding massacre, through the POV of the story's villain. While there are many pulp stories that include Nazis as villains, I've never seen one that goes as in-depth into the sheer atrocities of Nazi regimes as much as this one. Ewing really spares no time conveying just how utterly wretched they are in many ways other than just ethnic massacres (and the massacres of the book are harrowing to read as well, no grisly detail spared), the many insidious ways totalitarianism corrodes the soul of all subjected to it, long before the Nazis actually start dying. It's incredibly disturbing and not at all out of line with the real atrocities perpetuated in history.

And it's made all the more effective because the book goes to great length to describe the many, many life stories of all those that get killed by El Sombra, whether irredeemably evil or merely misguided soldiers, which lends a lot of weight to them. He's not just tearing his way through cartoonish embodiments of evil, he's murdering people brutally, to our enjoyment, because painting Nazis as people is not the same as humanizing them, it only makes them much, much more horrifying than any doomsday weapon could ever be.

The scene in particular where El Sombra has to dash alone into a burning building to rescue children, children who are seconds away from dying, children he had to kill an entire squad of Nazis just to be able to rescue, children that he cannot leave on the streets because otherwise they will be trampled or killed by a mob, had me gasping and not wanting to turn the page out of fear, actual fear that he wasn't gonna make it.

"Zorro vs Nazis" is an incredible simple premise, and I don't think it could be done better than it was here. Very, very solid start, although I do recommend that you go in aware of just how brutal and disturbing it can get.

Gods of Manhattan was the first one I read, and contrary to El Sombra's more western and pulp roots, this very much reads like a superhero comic book centered around pulp icons. Out of the three it's the one I like the least, but it's a very good book, one that could easily work on it's own even without it being a sequel. It's considerably less harrowing of a read than El Sombra and instead much more based around meat and potatoes storytelling, showing how the building blocks at work here are being arranged, and a larger exploration of liberty and egalitarianism and political aspects of the works Ewing's pulling from. Gods of Manhattan is the trilogy's moral compass, contrasting to the simple revenge thriller in El Sombra and the science fiction anthology of Pax Omega, setting up the major players of this world before Ewing can knock them around for the final installment.

One of the things I like most about the El Sombra trilogy is the mix-and-match of properties. Doc Thunder, for example, bears many surface similarities to Doc Savage, but he functions mainly as a Superman figure. He wears a logo akin to Shazam's, he has a reputation akin to that of Captain America's, we later learn his real name is Hugo and he's the in-universe equivalent to Hugo Danner. As the most straightforward superhero of the setting, Thunder condenses the history of it's biggest icons into a single being. The primary Shadow analogue here is the villain, but the villain also shares more common traits with The Spider and Spider-Man, and traits of The Shadow manifest in two other characters (the titular El Sombra, and a character known in-universe as The Blue Ghost who functions as more of a Spirit analogue). There's a shapeshifting dead-faced supervillain by the name of Anton Venger, referencing the pulp hero The Avenger. The Lex Luthor analogue turns into Doomsday by the story's end. It's the crafting of an interesting new mythology from bits and pieces from a larger whole and there's enough rich content here to last for a whole franchise.

If I had one major problem with this book, it would be the character of Marlene Lang. Marlene functions here mainly as the Margo to Blood-Spider's Shadow, and naturally, she gets twisted to the extreme. While the story's demonization of The Shadow's archetype is grounded in a larger point about the dangers of dark vigilantism, it's treatment of not-Margo/Nita here is purely for the sake of reinforcing the Spider's own awfulness. The story demonizes her by painting her as decadent and sadistic and promiscuous, and the latter in particular is really hammered into you as something that paints her as evil and unlikable, which is really shitty. I expected better from Ewing and I don't think this is a decision he would have gone with had he written the story today.

Still, Gods of Manhattan is terrific and gets a very solid recommendation from me. But much to my surprise, my favorite of the books actually wound up being Pax Omega.

Pax Omega is an incredibly ambitious book, spanning the entirety of time from beginning to end, every chapter presenting a radical shift in setting as we jump through time periods of this world's history. It has a truly staggering amount of worldbuilding to get through and a lot of it is pure exposition. It's a one man sci-fi anthology, and while that's turned off some of it's readers, I liked it considerably better than the other books. It weaves together it's narrative threads incredibly well as it gradually gives you a sense of where the story is heading (and was always heading right from the first book) as wilder and wilder concepts get brought into play corresponding to the massive changes brought by time.

Despite how separate a lot of these stories are, they all come together, and there is not a single wasted chapter or page here. It's got fun thrills, it's got action, it's got harrowing descriptions and passsages (particularly regarding El Sombra's discovery of Berlin), it's got enough worldbuilding in here for entire shared universes and not a single dull moment. Pax Omega cements this trilogy as one of my favorite superhero universes as well as easily the best superhero novels I've ever read, although it's playing with a lot of images and icons much older than superheroes, and even weaves in a bit of meta-storytelling.

It's definitely the book I'll most likely revisit in the future, and while I don't think this is a trilogy that could work as well outside of it's literary format, I think there's a lot of interesting aspects here to be learned from by anyone who wants to tackle pulp characters, or superheroes. Very impressed with this one.

#replies tag #al ewing #el sombra #gods of manhattan #pax omega #pulp heroes

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fedoranonymous · 4 years

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Infinite List of Beginner-Friendly Anime Recs: Trigun

"I am known as Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III. Don't hesitate to call."

tl;dr I questioned someone’s recommendation for someone else’s first anime on the basis that people who are unused to anime might like something that’s less than 20 hours long and tells one complete story within the first hour or so, and 20,000 words later I decided to make my own post(s) because I clearly had Feelings

26 x 30 minute episodes + 1 x 90 minute movie | watch it: netflix (?) | hulu | amazon prime | funimation

insurance agents go looking for a legendary outlaw in the Wild West But IN SPACE (tm) so that they can accurately estimate how much damage is caused by this humanoid natural disaster. damage still accrues.

Follow the Read More for more convincing and trigger warnings (to my best recollection)

Features:

less “space western” and more “western in the space”. Other than some pieces of Lost Technology (TM) this is a pretty standard rooty tooty mcshooty until you get into the Worldbuilding

the fact that the primary cast consists of one lovable doofus who just Doesn’t Know Why Everyone Keeps Shooting At Me and two insurance adjusters who are following him around to try and keep track of how much damage he causes still cracks me the fuck up

the best excused recap episode of all time re: they’re insurance adjusters. they have to SEND the rePORT ahahahahaha brb dying

one of the official summaries called Vash “more doofus than desperado” and like. yeah. yeah. you get it.

you thought Aang’s Technical Pacifism was good but Vash manages to not kill people while creating a torrential rain of bullets. For real. If you like the idea of action movies but hate seeing blood, most of this show is gonna be excellent for you and the rest is gonna be okay to good.

Wolfwood. Just. Give me this midwestern hick priest with his drive by confessional and his money grubbing ways and his heart of gold (ThInK oF tHe ChIlDrEn) and his literal cross to bear (do not google because spoilers but yeah) and his somehow keeping up with Vash when Vash has been an impossibly skilled fighter for like 8 episodes so far. Yeah he’s only in like two episodes. He’s still a great character!

pretty much every recurring character is Wholesome As Fuck and I’m here for it. Tons of quotable moments about how you can never give up and you have to keep moving forward and the inherent coolness of people and yeah. Just a good uplifting show with a whole lot of wasted bullets.

that time Vash has to pretend to actually be every rumor that has ever been spread about him and immediately starts singing “ladee dadee died~ genocide~ ladee dadee dud~ an ocean of blood~ let’s begin the killing times” because he is actually a five year old sometimes and i love him so much

impeccable animation, character design, sound work, etc would I recommend you something that would be painful to enjoy? I mean I guess you wouldn’t know, I could have outstandingly bad tastes, but no you cannot go wrong.

“Repeat after me: This world is made of! Love! And! Peace!”

I might say “x anime did better in the US in Japan” with more or less accuracy, but Trigun abso fucking lutely did so well in the US it got a movie over a decade later because that’s how long it took for dubs to come out back in the late nineties and early aughts. Surprise surprise, Westerns do better in the West. It’s also got the violence porn balanced with a specific precious moralizing that vibes well with a predominantly Christian audience balanced with genuinely awesome humor. Trigun truly is the anime for people who don’t like anime.

Watch Out For:

General warning for violence, guns being the answer to every problem, mostly implied body horror, at least one serial killer, this might be the show with the (implied?) cannibalism someone fact check me, child endangerment (to be fair it’s the child doing the endangering by sneaking in where he isn’t wanted), alcoholism, and general rough times. There’s something really poignant that’s escaping about how God abandoned the world but us humans don’t have that luxury, it’s that kind of setup.

Honestly special shout out for the specifically very accurately Christian proselytizing considering that it’s a Japanese production and as a rule Xtian imagery in anime tends to be used like, say, grecoroman imagery in Hollywood. Occasionally accurate but usually just kind of generalized meh. It was a plus for the overall production but if you’re on my blog it might be a minus for you.

Episode 4 to the point that it’s regarded as borderline ooc. A woman is tied up in such a way that she’s dangling from the ceiling and Vash makes a beeline to try and see up her skirt. It’s an obvious gag and nothing is shown iirc (to be fair I only watched the broadcast version), but I know some folks would like the warning especially after the previous point. It’s a shame because the rest of the episode is really good, it’s an adaptation of the pilot chapter that got Trigun greenlit, but the scene is fairly standalone so should be skippable. Just look for Vash’s eager puppy look and go forward about two minutes.

Millie Tommygun, being the cheerful, optimistic one of the two main girls, can be treated kind of shittily by the narrative, which is hilarious considering Vash’s Whole Everything. I think Millie has internalized the idea that she’s the stupid one to Meryl’s Sarcastic Genius, but also Millie’s the one who figured out who Vash is first and just generally the one who calls people out on their bullshit, with a smile, which is literally their jobs. She’s never unlikable, though, unlike Meryl who needs to defrost to Vash’s Whole Everything despite having Millie for a friend. Perhaps they only just met on this assignment? Otherwise idk why Meryl ain’t used to it yet, probably some heterosexual bullshit.

Any time Knives is in the summary. Remember that “at least one serial killer” yeah that’s Knives et al. Shit has to get darker before you can see the light shining through.

Overall Trigun is such a good anime. It’s just. Have you ever wondered what Avatar the Last Airbender would be like if it was an East Asian author writing about Western tropes? Now you know.

#eli's anime recs #main trigger warnings are body horror ultraviolence and the existence of at least one serial killer #and overt xtian themes? with all of the previous #possible cannibalism too i think this is the one #it's a good show but it is Dramatic As Fuck #also for fuck's sake if you know the show and I missed something please chime in

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douxreviews · 5 years

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Gotham - ‘They Did What?’ Review

Gordon: "For Gotham!"

When FOX kicks the support beams out from under you and says that the narrative you had planned to normally span across a twenty-two episode season now has to be condensed down to ten episodes, I guess it makes sense that your last few episodes are going to feel more like a paint-by-numbers project as you struggle to quickly wrap up character arcs so that those characters in question can resemble their comic counterparts.

Any remaining characteristic that Gotham hasn't shown the genesis for is abruptly wrapped up here in 'They Did What?' - Oswald loses an eye and gets his monocle, Bruce summons a colony of bats, Gordon's daughter is named 'Barbara,' and Gordon gets his promotion to Commissioner. And there's really no weight behind any of these developments, they just sort of happen because... they need to happen. Last year, in Thomas Ijon Tichy's review of 'The Sinking Ship, The Grand Applause,' he mentioned how there wasn't much of a thread that connected the plot points or character moments of that episode, "Things Just Happen." And that's mostly how I feel about this sudden conclusion to 'They Did What?', things just happen and there's no rhythm or flow to a lot of them.

Nyssa abducts Barbara instead of just killing her like she said she was going to do, and wants to raise Barbara's child as her own. Barbara manages to stab her in the gut but she still walks it off. Nyssa locks Gordon and Barbara in a room so she can make her escape. Gordon is able to kick the door down anyway. Bane's invasion overpowers and takes over the GCPD but instead of killing Gordon and Bruce like he said he was going to do, he takes a detour just so he can ambush Bruce and Selina in an alleyway. Bruce saves Selina by summoning a colony of bats because of course he just happens to acquire at the last-minute sonar equipment. The terrified refugees of Gotham City attempting to flee underground return to the surface anyway so they can stare down Bane and a firing squad. Nyssa escapes in Oswald's submarine alone even though it was stated two people are needed to pilot that thing.

For once, I don't know if the cobbled-together writing here can be blamed solely on the showrunners though because simply we just don't know if their intended 'vision' for Season 5 was meant to last an entire year before FOX cut their air time down to size.

If there is a highlight though for this episode (and there are several, mind you), it begins with where we began this year. The sequence of Gordon, Bullock, Oswald and Nygma suiting up and taking the stand against Bane's army in a dire effort to protect the GCPD I confess had me energized and eyes glued to the screen, and even if it's incredibly jarring that for some reason this sequence occurs in daylight while the standoff shown in 'Year Zero' was happening at nightfall, it's an absolutely energizing scene. Never mind the fact that Bane's army, which supposedly outnumbered the GCPD six-hundred to thirty-one, has the firing accuracy of an Imperial Stormtrooper, this scene had wit, it had rapport, it even had a little bit of heart (turns out Oswald loses his eye while defending Nygma), and it's oddly enough a nice depiction too of an incredibly dysfunctional group willing to set aside past grudges to defend in any way they can the city that is a part of them, that has had a hand in each of their upbringings.

I was a little skeptical at first of why Oswald would be wiling to come back and put his life on the line for Gotham City after going through so much trouble to leave it behind and start life anew elsewhere. But of course, Robin Lord Taylor's performance in the office-sequence across from Gordon completely convinced me, and as much as I love his chemistry with Cory Michael Smith, Taylor and Ben McKenzie are also a phenomenal pair when they get scenes like this one. In many ways, their portrayals of Penguin and Gordon have shown they can at times be inverted versions of the same individual, and by now have established this nice ebb-and-flow of knowing when to work together, and when they can be at each other's throats.

It's unfortunate that so late in the game Gotham is somewhat hinting at a redemption arc for Barbara because she's so endearing and likable when she's anything but a psychotic mob boss. I liked her character just fine enough for the first half of Season 1, and even though as a character, she's been through the grinder time and time again, but Erin Richards, like Taylor and Smith, just has that charm to her that makes her enjoyable to watch when she's spirited and vibrant as opposed to being so full of anger, venom and angst.

Shippers of Oswald and Nygma will probably seethe at the resolution to their arc until they're blue in the face, but I personally enjoyed it nonetheless. At the end of it all, Nygma's decided that he felt nothing, no hint of triumph, joy or euphoria, even when Gotham City is rejoicing for their salvation. The very city he put his life on the line to defend. Because it sickens him just knowing he had to associate himself with the civilian population that he considers intellectually inferior to him. Nygma relapsing into his megalomaniac egotistical persona is such a 'Riddler' thing of him to do, and it inspires Oswald to agree with his notion that they shouldn't have to ever think about changing who they are to please everyone else - they're criminal masterminds and if that's what fate has planned for them, then so be it. And as amusing as an on-screen visual it was, I don't think Nygma and Oswald secretly pulling blades on each other with the intention of double-crossing the other adds anything to this ending, simply because the scene succeeds in getting across anyway the notion that they're brothers-in-arms, and will be for the time being - blades or no blades.

Something I've been dreading for a while has finally reared its ugly head in this episode, and because we now know the series finale is actually a time-jump, there's no room at all left for Gotham to resolve it: the very reason Batman even exists in the first place. In the five years we have journeyed with Bruce Wayne on his quest to rise one day as Gotham's caped crusader, Gotham has forgotten to address two core aspects to what makes Batman... well, Batman. And those are why does Bruce Wayne/Batman need to work outside the law and why is Bruce's motif bats?

Rather than deliver on the indication that Bruce was going to be infiltrating and dissolving gang factions throughout the city this year, Bruce instead spends much of this season assisting the GCPD, and by the end of this season, not only is Gordon's lineup of cops shown to be capable of holding off Bane's army of grunts, but it is a mob of ordinary civilians that is able to coerce Bane's army into standing down and turning on Bane himself. In the end, we can't help but wonder then 'why would this city even need a lawless vigilante?' What has shown Bruce that the municipal government of the city is incapable of enforcing proper law and order?

And then there's the bat motif. "But Aaron, Bruce had a vision of bats and Batman back in Season 4!" I understand that, but that isn't enough. That silhouette with the signature bat ears poking up in Bruce's vision still needs a point of origin. In response to that argument, Batman cannot create himself. Otherwise, what is stopping Bruce from fashioning his cowl and armor to resemble just about anything he wants? The design and appearance of Batman is tied in many renditions of the character to Bruce's fear of bats themselves. Several times in the past it has been hinted by David Mazouz among others that Bruce's fear of bats would be a plot point explored in this series, but ultimately, that never came to pass. Yes, Lucius gives Bruce some tech that utilizes sonar which just happens to have a side effect of attracting certain animals, but at this point in the series, when we're so close to the finish line, this feels more than anything else like an afterthought as opposed to a development that will leave an impact on Bruce and something he feels is necessary to incorporate into his campaign of vigilantism.

I almost feel like my energy could be best utilized in other departments then commenting on what a trainwreck Gotham's interpretation of Nyssa Al Ghul is. Almost. For goodness' sake, the series itself seems to even have no concept of this character's identity because literally any quote delivered by a character concerning Nyssa contains what we already know - that she wants Bruce and Barbara dead, and she wants to destroy Gotham. Over and over again, that's spoon-fed to the viewer, like they're fussy children and Gotham is the mother trying to get them to eat their peas. For all her bluster that she is an 'Al Ghul' and that stronger people than Gordon and Barbara have tried and failed to kill her, in the end, she scampers off with her tail between her legs (unknowingly dog-napping Edward the bulldog in the process. That absolutely hurt me.), marking her as the final of many quite forgettable antagonists Gotham has had to offer. Do I even need to comment on the low blow that is this character threatening a defenseless infant with a dagger?

So in the end, Gotham City earns its salvation, Gordon gets his promotion, and Bruce pulls the "Dear John" letter trope from Season 3's finale and uses it to tell Selina that he's leaving Gotham City for...reasons. The real kicker here was knowing though that Camren Bicondova has evidently been recast as an older Selina Kyle for Gotham's series finale, which genuinely saddens me now knowing that a scene containing her realizing Bruce has also essentially walked out on her life is the last moment we have with this actress.

Aaron Studer loves spending his time reading, writing and defending the existence of cryptids because they can’t do it themselves.

#Gotham #Batman #James Gordon #Bruce Wayne #Oswald Cobblepot #Edward Nygma #Selina Kyle #Gotham Reviews #Doux Reviews #TV Reviews

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thehalfworld · 7 years

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Fanfic MST: Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen, a Twilight fanfic [part 7]

The penultimate chapter!

Warnings this time include sex, violence, and a few references to what went down in the previous installments.

Recap: Tiaa learned that her father is a vampire, and that she would become one herself if she had sex with Edward. Guess what she did. (Also, she killed Uncle Larry and drank his blood.)

Chapter 1

Previous chapter

thanx for the revews!

You’re so welcome!

Chapter 7 - Surprises!

I woke up sheepishly and wandered where I was for a minute.

Vampires don’t sleep, and no one wakes up “sheepishly.”

I got out of bed, wandering if all the things that had hapened to me last night were just a dream. I went downstairs for breakfast and sat down with Dave and Marie.

Vampires don’t eat breakfast, either. Unless she plans on eating Dave and Marie. I wouldn’t object.

THey look at me and smiles adoringly.

You do have a beta reader, right?

"wow tiaa i love your new hair and contat lenses, your look so beautiful!" said marie with her face all bright and happiness.

Marie freaks me the hell out. Why is she so perky?

I got up and look in a mirror. Holly shite! I looked totally diffrent! For the first time I could see my face was truely beautiful, it was even prettier than before.

If you can possibly imagine that, because Tiaa’s descriptions of herself in previous chapters weren’t exactly modest.

My eyes were a weird silver color like wet pools of noble moonlight in distant medows,and my ivory gold hair seemed to shimmer like the suns burned rays in the morning, with the purple streaks shining like neon lilac.

So in the Twilight universe, vampire eye color depends on how recently they last fed and what they last fed on. A vampire with human blood in their system will have red eyes; a hungry vampire has black eyes; vampires who eat nonhuman animals (like Edward and his family) have gold eyes after feeding. Tiaa ate Uncle Larry last night, and she’s newly turned, so she definitely has human blood in her body. Her eyes should be red.

I guess her hair’s the same except for the dye job, though, because she used to have multiple colors streaked into her hair and now she just has purple. Not sure how being a vampire would affect that, honestly.

I was radiant and magical and looked awesome.

I love this sentence.

My skin was even more pale than before and my features more delicate and queen-like, my nose was small and dashing and my cheeks were high and pale and my chin was soft but majestic. I was amazed.

I’m just hoping that she still smells like mint and cinnamon.

Suddenly the phone rang and nuked me out of my silent staring.

Must be one of those newfangled atomic phones.

Dave answered it.

"what? oh my god! Your kidding! This is inconsideratable!" and he hung up

Nice vocabulary, Dave. Nice job hanging up on the caller, too.

"whats happened honey?" Marie asked smiling

Why is she always smiling? Is her face stuck like that?

"uncle larry is died, it looks like he was ripped apart by a wild beast! I feel so sad!

Yeah, you seem real…

(wait for it…)

…torn up about it.

he was my brother"

Not sure why he needed to remind everyone. Can’t imagine Uncle Larry was a pleasant brother, though, since his entire character consisted of being ugly and evil.

I suddenly remembered what I had done, and i screamed and ran to school.

That’s not suspicious or anything! Actually, wait, it’s Dave and Marie; they won’t suspect a thing.

Also, I pictured her doing this like Gir from Invader Zim.

I felt so awful and giulty for what I had done! I new uncle larry was a perv and a rasist and even thou he had raped me and tied me up and spanked me and made my life hell I still shoudnt have killed him!

No, you totally should have killed him.

I was going to explode with guilt. i ran through the forest towards the school but suddenly a large thing appeared in front of me.

Wow! Love the description!

it was a bear - a big panda bear!

…this is happening in a small town in Washington State, correct?

it was huge and fluffy and realy cute, but I was scared as this was a totally weird thing to happen.

She’s not wrong.

But, then again, in the context of this story I guess it’s not too implausible.

"greetings atlantaina!" it said - i was totally freaked out - since when did panda bears live in Forks? And since when did they SPEAK? I was totally confused

You and me both, girl.

"WTF?" i screamed!

"I'm a panda bear, my name is Snooflanti-tatuna but you can call me Snoofles.”

Well, thank god, because I have no idea how to pronounce that first thing you said.

"A talking PANDA BEAR?" i shouted furiously

Why is she angry?

"I cannot talk like humans can, but your not human anymore so you can understand me. You can talk to animals. You probably have other powers too you just don't know it yet"

Oh, I get it. So I think I mentioned this earlier, but in the Twilight universe some vampires gain a special ability after being turned — typically an amplification of some ability they possessed as a human. That’s how come Edward can read minds, his sister Alice has visions of the future, his brother Jasper can influence the moods of others, and so on. Tiaa’s ability to communicate with animals comes out of nowhere only in the sense that it wasn’t foreshadowed; the power fits with canon otherwise.

I’m pretty sure one vampire having multiple extra abilities is unheard of, though. There goes Tiaa breaking the rules again. (Though at this point… after all she’s been through… I guess she deserves something good for a change, no?)

"like watt?" i said

"I dunno, touch that tree" said Snoofles, smiling at me.

Hey, hold up. How does the panda know all this shit? Like… how does he know who Tiaa is? How does he know about how vampires work? Even allowing that Tiaa can communicate with animals now, how come this one is demonstrating human-like sapience?

You know what, none of this will ever get explained and I’m done thinking about it. Let’s move on.

I touched the tree and consentrated hard and even though it was winter the tree suddenly started to bloom huge bunches of flowers. The flowers cascadad down like a river onto the bare forest floor. i took my hand away in horror. The flowers were so beautiful they made me think of edward. then i remembered how he had left me after we had made love, and i became angry. I touched another tree and it burst into flames. It was as if the trees turned into things that somehow reflected how I was feeling!

This power actually makes sense for volatile, moody Tiaa, but it’s not gonna be very useful until she learns to control it. Which might never happen because this girl is an emotional loose cannon. Also we’re on the second-to-last chapter.

"OMG, how is this possible?" i said

"Don't ask me I'm just a panda, lol" said Snoofles with a big grin and he raised his eyebows,"but I'm so happy to find a person who can understand my speaking! i al; ways wanted a human friend! will you be my human friend?"

Nice going, author. I like how you had Snoofles know things he shouldn’t and then had him not know how he knows those things he shouldn’t. Great writing! Allows you to avoid explaining anything at all!

"well yah ok" i said, "but i have to go to school now so I'll see you later Snoofles ok?"

"that's cool" said Snoofles "i'll see you later"

I ran away and was totaly weirded out by my meeting with Snoofles.

I, too, was totally weirded out by your meeting with Snoofles.

I was almost in a trance at school and even though people starred at me and made coments about my new apperance I had never cared less.

Maybe because they did this every day anyway?

in gym class I ran around dressed in my gym clothes.

That is what one typically does in gym class, yes.

i was playing dodgball and the cleerleaders kept throwing there balls at me realy hard like biaches but i was dodging them at the speed of light.

Being subtle, I see! Good going convincing everyone you’re still human!

Lauren came over to me and tries to hit me over the face with her balls and I slapped her in the face.

Did Lauren just try and teabag Tiaa?

"WTF you freaky goth tudor bitch!" she shouted with her ugly face flapping like a big bag

I swear this fic has the best similes I have ever seen.

"leave me alone yeah?" i said looking more beautiful than ever

And this is relevant why?

"no - ill never leave u alone becase your so werid! what has hapened to your face its like your from another planet, your so pale and delicate its freaking everyone out and we all hate you!"

Well put, Lauren.

I was so mad i pushed her but when my hands touched her arms her skin started to blister and froth in a totally gross way and she got struck by a bolt of lightning. She wasnt dead or anything but she looked totally disgusting and she got taken to the hospital.

Nasty! Can’t say I feel bad for Lauren, though.

I didnt look for my friends and after gym class I sat in the changing rooms after everyone has left and cried becase I felt so sorry for watt I had done to uncle larry and to lauren.

Oh, come on. Lauren is just a bully, admittedly, but Uncle Larry was a rapist — a particularly violent one committing repeated rape against a teenager, no less. Killing him was just taking out the trash. And Lauren should be okay-ish after a few skin grafts.

I was sat there wearing a very short leather mini-dress and red ripped tights and a skull necklace and a gothic top hat with feathers on it.

She headed to an Emilie Autumn concert after school or what?

Suddenly I heard a voices from behind me

A voices. One voice, but it’s plural. Got it.

(I wanna make a System Shock joke here but I can’t think of a good one.)

"Tiaa? Tiaa? It is I Edward Cullen!" said edward.

No one on this planet talks like that. I don’t care what time period you’re from.

i turned to kook at him and he gasped in a high piched way and fell over onto the floor. I was mad at him and totaly upset about other stuff so i didnt check to see if he was ok. He got up in a minute.

…alright, I’m not sure how to react to that.

"I fainted Tiaa, thou is so sexy and exqisite i lost my contentioness.

I’m pretty sure vampires can’t faint. Did he pretend to faint? Because, if so, that’s really funny.

Thy face is even more sacred and filled with shinning glory than before, I am amazed" but then he noticed I was crying tears of soft blood and he said "what is wrong with thee?" said Edward

“Im trunign into a My Immortal characted!11!11!!1” I yielded depressingly as blod streemed down my iviory fetnures. “Ewdard fangz 4 all da help but not even u can salve me now. I”m gong to go slit my rists with a steak so i can end my live of mizery!112!!!!11111”

“OMS no Tiaa dont go!” Edwerd shooted sadly but it waz 2 latte. I cut miself with da knife and da word went blak.

"I killed someone Ewadrd! I killed my uncle and drank his blood and I think I made lauren get stuck by lightning"

Okay, but like… Edward knows your “uncle” had been raping and beating you repeatedly. The Lauren thing might be considered bad, since her main crime was just being an asshole, but Tiaa didn’t mean to hurt her like that, so it’s not really her fault.

"its ok Tiaa he was evil and noone cares about lauren" Edward says to comfort me and he put his arms round me

Dude has a point.

"still watt i did was awfull and anyways GET OFF ME!" i stood up and shock him off me "dont come near me ever again! I havent forgiven you for whatt happened last night! We did sex and you left me there in the forest!"

"I'm sorry! I cannot stay away from thee and yet I cannot be with thee either" he cried and threw his hands up and weeped

Hey, wanna play a drinking game? Take a shot every time Edward starts crying. Finish your drink every time Edward goes immediately from putting the moves on Tiaa to saying he can’t be with her or vice versa. I guarantee you will get very, very drunk.

"make your mind up Ewdard! this is a serious thing! Ether stay here with me now and screw me and be with me forrever or leave and go be with Bella! Make youre choice right now!"

That’s a reasonable ultimatum except for the part where she propositioned him for sex while they’re in a public area of their high school.

"I choose thee Atlantnina! Bella is a big mean cow and I cant be with her anymore!

Get wrecked, Bella.

I will never leave thou side again my lovley damsell!"

See? Was that so hard?

He started to cry and I kissed him. He was so amazing. His yellow eyes and tussled aubon hair and pale skin made me want to screw him all the time, I'd never seen anybody look so perfect.

Get a grip, kids, you’re at school.

I took off my dress so I was only wearing my underwear and i sat on his knee and we kissed a lot.

What part of “get a grip” was so hard for you to understand?

He touched me all over and I felt dizzy and week.

This is shaping up to be a very vague sex scene, huh?

"Do you mean it edward? You'll be mine forrever?"

"I does, i shall be thy mate" he said beautifully in his smooth hot velvet voice

I didn’t get any girls in high school, but I guess it was probably because I didn’t speak in butchered old-timey English, huh? Nothing gets teenage girls going like a little bizarre grammar!

I found some handcuffs on a bench and I tied him to a hook.

I could get analytical about what it means for Tiaa, who was chained to a bed and nearly raped the day before, to develop an interest in restraining her sexual partners… but I’m far more confused by why the hell there are handcuffs laying around in a high school.

he was unable to move and i took his pants down and looked at his throbbing lavender man-fruit thing.

Why is it lavender? Is he okay?

It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and I put it in my mouth and sucked it and he thrusted madly untill he had an orgasm in my mouth.

I’m far from being a seasoned erotica writer, but if you go from the beginning of the sex act to the climax in a single sentence it really makes it sound like your character came about 10 seconds in. Which, even for a 17-year-old boy, is pretty embarrassing.

The hot juice flowered in my mouth and it was magical.

I really don’t think it was, actually.

Sodenly a voice came from behind me

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING YOU EVIL RODENT PEOPLE?

It was……………………………. DUMBLEDORE!!11!!!

I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU BOTH AND NOW I AM GOING TO KILL MYSELF!"

It was Bella Swan!

Okay, that had to have been a homage to “My Immortal.” And god bless!

Next chapter

#forbidenfruit.mst #fandom:twilight #halfworld.mst

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bansheemilktales · 7 years

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Proof You Are A Dummy If You Think Jack Nicholson Is Overrated

People make too big of a deal about actors, don't they? They call some geniuses on a regular basis. Don't get me wrong, some are amazingly talented. But actors are told where to stand, what to say and what to do. They're people who are paid to pretend, okay? They're like hookers faking an orgasm. So maybe we could calm down on the genius talk. Some are good at it and some are not. It's that simple. And yet, as simple as this concept is, I have noticed most people don't understand it at all.

I've heard dumb people of my generation say that Jack Nicholson is overrated a million times. Here is why you are dumb if you say this: MATH exists.

With MATH, one can use the ancient art of counting the skills a person has at acting to determine whether or not an actor is good without having to rely on feelings which are an invalid way to form an opinion. I know we have a right to feel what we want, guys, but be reasonable. Feelings are for feeling, not for thinking. If you dropped acid this morning you might feel you are an orange. But you are not an orange. If you say, "I think ___ is a bad actor" you must back it up with evidence.

The reason I hear dummies of my generation (Generation X) give when they say Jack is overrated is that "All he does is use a nasal voice and twitch his eyebrows...he is always the same." And then they give nothing but examples from 1980 and on. Movies like Batman, Wolf, The Shining, As Good As It Gets.

Listen here, dumb folks. His career begins in 1958. That's when Eisenhower was President. If you only watch movies made when you were alive you are a fucking idiot. QUESTION: Why would Hollywood have waited until you were born to start making movies good? Answer: They didn't. They haven't even heard of you.

You see, even if you do not like a movie, that doesn't mean it is bad. It simply must succeed at the majority of it's goals to be good. Because you hated "that one part" does not mean the whole movie stinks. There have been good movies being made for over 100 years. Good meaning it succeeded at it's goal. Meaning a comedy that makes people laugh, a thriller that made people feel excited...etc.

Here is a list of the 5 things a great actor should be able to do:

1) Can they emote well? Do they convince you that they are feeling what their character is supposed to be feeling in the scene? Do they seem angry, happy etc.? Most actors who have been successful for more than a decade can do this at least competently whether we like them or not. People get tired of watching someone who cannot simply pretend they are feeling something. It is a useful skill and perhaps the most common among decent actors.

2) Chameleon Powers: Can they do accents, can they change their body language and physical tics, are they willing to change appearance drastically due to make-up, dieting, etc? This skill is a bit more rare. Good examples of this style of acting are Marlon Brando, Robert De Niro, Daniel Day Lewis, Robert Downey Jr, Al Pacino and Gary Oldman. In fact, Day Lewis and Oldman are probably the best chameleons currently working. De Niro, Nicholson & Pacino in the 70s and Brando in the 50s and 60s. (Yes, Nicholson has done it many times whether you saw the films or not).

3) Do they pick challenging scripts that will force them out of their comfort zone and into new territory as an actor? It is a good thing to do but sadly, dramatic actors and action stars are the worst at this meaning, once they are successful at a genre they tend to stick with it. Jason Statham does not appear to be interested in picking something out of his comfort zone. In the 70s, Stallone showed great range and was compared to Brando, James Dean & De Niro but then he mostly played guys who blew stuff up ever since. So with few exceptions like Copland and Oscar, picking challenging parts is not one of his best attributes. While many enjoy his action films, he desperately needs to do something challenging or his memory will always be as the guy who had a good relationship with the pyrotechnic crew. That gets boring.

4) Do they ever pick something that is a crowd pleaser? This one is tricky. We want them to pick challenging work, yes, but if they never pick a "fun" movie or a "popcorn" movie, actors come off as self important. For all the money actors make they owe their audience a good time now and then and, let's face it, a movie about babies dying in the congo doesn't cut it for most people. So I am referring to comedy, action, horror, sci fi...some kind of a tentpole picture. Do they ever even try at these things? Daniel Day Lewis for example, will not do a movie unless it has a disturbing death scene, and/or a scene where he yells needlessly. (We heard you say "Now" the first time, Lincoln) Is he good at these things? Hell yes. He is perhaps the best "intensity" actor working today. But since acting is not necessarily always about being intense, Day Lewis needs to lighten the fuck up sometimes. Makes sense, right? If you knew a great chef would you tell him to just make one type of meal all the time? Perhaps you criticize an action guy like Stallone for doing the same "type" of movie repeatedly. Day Lewis, like Stallone, is an great actor who needs a new trick. Look at Gary Oldman. Every bit the chameleon Day Lewis is but he will throw in a Batman or Harry Potter role to mix things up. Gary Oldman delivers to both his "artsy fartsy" fans and his "I wanna see something blow up" fans. Demand more from actors who have shown great skill. Don't let the Daniel Day Lewis types off the hook of responsibility to their audience if you are quick to ridicule the Stallones. Be consistent or you are one of the dummies I'm referring to in this article.

5) Comedy. Virtually every actor says it is the hardest genre to perform in and many people do not understand why. Allow me to show you why this is absolutely true. When watching a really good drama, one can have many reactions, right? You can cry, you can think, you can even become disturbed to a point you have to leave the room. For a comedy to be good, it is forced to try to get one reaction: Laughter. If it does not make you laugh, it has failed. Since the target they are aiming for is smaller, they are taking a more difficult shot. This is why so many comedies suck balls. Serious films are shooting at a bullseye the size of a battleship. Hence, whoever the greatest actor on Earth is, he or she MUST be able to handle comedy. Without some funny, you are at best, in the second tier of great actors.

So, all one has to do to form an opinion that matters is see how much of this criteria an actor fits. I won't tell you who the greatest actor on Earth is, but clearly they excel at all 5 things on this list. If it is 4, they are damn good, too. Just not the best.

Let's look at Jack Nicholson and see how he holds up: #1 is chameleon abilities and yes, if you have looked at his pictures as much as I have you will notice accents and characteristics changing (lesser so in the last 35 years which is why my generation fails to see this talent in him as they tend to only watch movies made after Star Wars. Seriously guys, it is a fact. He changes. Read up on it. He just became so famous after 1980 or so that audiences wanted to see a certain persona from him and won't accept another kind.). #2- He emotes well. Even his detractors agree about this. The man convinces you he feels what his character feels. #3- He has done every single genre. Seriously. So while I don't know what his comfort zone is, he definitely left it since he has done every type of movie under the sun. #4- Does he ever do one for the audience-a "crowd pleaser"? Yes, he has. Again, he has acted in every genre except perhaps silent. #5- Comedy? He has won Oscars for his performances in BOTH comedies and dramas. Think about that. Whoever you think is the best, did they win in different genres?

You don't have to like him if you don't want to. But he fits the bill. This is a great actor and you are just dumb to say otherwise.

Again, keeping emotion out of this, let's look at Daniel Day Lewis, who clearly holds up numbers 1 (chameleon) and 2 (emoting) quite well, perhaps better than anyone else alive. But if we are honest, he suffers in the other 3. This is the guy who everybody says is the greatest actor of his generation. Yet, he won't do anything outside of drama and he stays in his comfort zone of playing super intense dudes who make everyone else in the scene nervous. What's that? I forgot about that hilarious comedy he made? No, I didn't. Cuz he didn't make it.

But don't worry, Day Lewis fans. I will now go after someone else you probably love to hate. Let's look at Stallone. Yeah, Stallone may have proven he emotes well in films like Rocky, and he may have proven he has the ability to change up his mannerisms and voice in movies like First Blood and Copland, but, let's face it, he fails pretty miserably at #3 by making way too many action movies and he hasn't strayed from his comfort zone since 1997's Copland. What's that? 1997 is a real life date that happened? Wow, you're right. So while it has been too long, he has, in fact, strayed from his comfort zone. Maybe not enough but he has done it. What's that? He just made a comedy with De Niro and was lauded by many as being very funny? And did you just say that half of his lip and jaw and tongue are paralyzed from an accident at birth and this gives him the "snarl-like" smile and slurred speech that you so readily make fun of? So he has given ALL of his performances disabled and he never uses that to sell himself or ask you, the asshole public, to stop mocking his disability? Holy shit. You're right. Stallone is one of the greatest actors on Earth. Writing is a talent, as is acting, bodybuilding, doing stunts, painting and overcoming immense physical obstacles.

See what I mean? You thought Jack Nicholson sucked because you've seen 5 of his 100 movies and were disappointed. Now you know that he is awesome. You thought Stallone sucked and now, unless you are close-minded and screaming "No, No, No, No" you see that he is a disabled guy who manages to be way more talented than you, a person who judges actors by a "gut feeling". No? You disagree? You think feelings are more real than facts? So you really are an orange when you drop acid? Just a quick FYI: Another great thing about some actors is when they have other talents outside of acting that can inform their performances. Nicholson can write & direct. Stallone is a successful painter, directed 5 of his most successful films, a gifted writer (he wrote Rocky in 3 days and it won Best Picture), a talented body builder who was willing to throw that away and get fat for Copland, and you still are going to say DD Lewis is more talented than him? Is this because he is good at pretending? I agree. He is awesome at pretending. I also used the art of counting and it turns out pretending is only one talent. Sorry. MATH wins again.

Jack Nicholson: 5 out of 5 required skills in acting.

Stallone: 4.5 out of 5. I am taking half a point off because while he has gone out of his comfort zone it has been far too infrequent.

Daniel Day Lewis: 2 out of 5.

Dumb people of the world, stop saying people suck when you haven't given it much thought. You might be mocking someone with a disability you didn't even know about. Plus, it isn't your opinion that Day Lewis is the best since his skills end at pretending and being intense. It is your feeling that he is the best. And yeah, he feels like the best to me, too. We hear it being said so much on TV that we tend to believe it. Or some of you feel like agreeing with the masses so you won't get mocked. I have OCD. I obsess about my opinions and analyze them. Then I destroy people who say stupid shit. Seriously, every actor picks a stupid script sometimes. People used to say "Not Johnny Depp". You still saying that lately? It's been like 5 bad movies in a row. Day Lewis did a movie called "9". That movie is a fart of a movie. I am convinced the director was just a butt. Dustin Hoffman did Ishtar. De Niro made 3 movies about the "Fockers", each one more Focking stupid than the last. So, yes. Jack Nicholson and Stallone have made some stupid movies. But so did your favorite actor. And did your favorite actor WRITE his or her Best movie? No? Then shut the fuck up with your hand me down thoughts while the rest of us invent our own.

written by Michael Anthony (Tony) Santiago, painting by Michael Anthony (Tony) Santiago @BansheeMilk

#jack nicholson #daniel day lewis #sylvester stallone #funny article #writer

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mongoose-and · 7 years

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Class Order Hall Campaigns: Rated (7.1.5)

From Best -> Worst

Druid

Shaman

Death Knight

Warrior

Monk

Mage

Warlock

Demon Hunter

Rogue

Priest & Paladin (Tied)

Paladin & Priest (Tied)

Hunter (get wreckt)

Reasons below the cut (Spoilers)

For the sake of discussion, I will absolutely be conflating the Artifact quest lines in with the class Campaign quests.

1. Druid - Druid's campaign basically breaks the curve by sheer scope. The campaign focuses on one major theme for this part of the expansion, and just expands on it beautifully. You are charged with protecting the Emerald Dreamway, rescuing Malorne, and eventually saving the Emerald Dream from the forces of both the Legion and the Emerald Nightmare. Between the beauty of the different zones, the massive gatherings of druids, exploration of Druid lore, and getting to relive the War of the Ancients at Mount Hyjal, none of the other class campaigns quite compare to sheer magnitude of history and lore that Druids get to explore. It also doesn’t hurt that Druid is an amazing class to play in its own right and each artifact quest is clever and interesting (except the Balance questline. That was pretty weak TBH). This campaign really made me feel the ‘class fantasy’.

2. Shaman - Close contender for being almost as epic as the druid campaign. The major theme of the Shaman questline is leading the Earthen Ring and uniting the Elemental Lords against the Legion, which is kinda like bargaining with a bunch of perpetually angry, murderous children to team up and fight Communism. Nonetheless, the shaman campaign has fun and interesting quests as well as insight to how the Elementals work (or don’t work) with each other, and they make good use of a variety of former instances and questing zones (including a finale in the Firelands that is beautiful and hectic).

3. Death Knight - Another top contender given THAT FINALE THO. GET WRECKT PALIDANS YEAH- oh, nevermind. Really, my only complaint was that the very end of the finale fell short (should’ve just let us do it, Blizz), and that it wasn’t Dark Souls Hard the whole way. Everything else about the Death Knight campaign was fantastic - raising the new Four Horsemen, killing lots of people, causing mayhem, Lich King Bolvar. Superb stuff, all the way.

4. Warrior - The quest line that starts meh, gets good, gets great, then settles back into “good” again. Sadly, I think it was a missed opportunity to explore the warrior cultures of the Horde and Alliance, and instead focused entirely on the lore and history of the Titans / Vrykul. For what it is, though, I think Blizz did a great job, and I don’t see the quest line they built fitting into any of the other classes nearly as well. It wasn’t the story that we wanted or needed for Warriors, but it was the best damned way to tell the story they did. Also, lolz Ulduar quest zone~

5. Monk - This is a fine quest line that falls short by virtue of just not being as epic as the others. It’s also the questline that convinced me that the Vrykul story only really paired well with the Warrior class hall. It starts strong by basically trashing the set in at the Peak of Serenity in Pandaria, and takes you back to the Wandering Isle (remember there?). Then it proceeds to utterly destroy shit in Pandaria at literally every chance it gets, which is great fun. Then you make God Beer and defeat a winged commie space goat.

6. Mage - This is where the class hall quests start to get a bit underwhelming, TBH. The whole quest line revolves around Archmage Vargoth being weird, only to reveal that he was possessed by demons. Honestly, it’s not great on it’s own, and if it wasn’t presented as a ‘mystery’ that we all could solve within the first five seconds of stepping into the order hall, it probably would have been more interesting. However, throughout the quest line, you do get some cool lore, elves, stupid Khadgar tricks, more elves, vomiting deaders, gaggles of elves, a blue-haired dragon husband, too many elves, Milhouse Manastorm, and a free trip to your most hated (my favorite) dungeon from Wrath of the Lich King, THE OCULUS! Also, so many elves... even though they are shit at magic.

7. Warlock - High School Drama: The Anime: The Quest Line. Seriously, you could probably make a decent anime out of just about anything that happens with Warlocks - the angst, the interpersonal drama, the cute/disgusting monsters they subjugate to serve them, the unlikely capture/escape scenarios, the pink hair. It manages to be clever and more interesting than some of the other quests, but it ultimately boils down to a whole lot meaningless drivel and a weird “choose your favorite girl to join your cool kids’ clique” decision at the end. And then you have the orc who keeps leaving butt-cinders *everywhere*.

8. Demon Hunter - Basically you finish what you started with the Demon Hunter starting zone. And then you fight twins in what is probably one of the better finales of all the quests. However, apart from a cool finale and the fact that you get your own space ship, there’s not really much about the Demon Hunter quest line that really excited me. Demon Hunters are insufferable characters in general, Korvas Bloodthorn doesn’t get to be your bodyguard, and if you picked Kayn Sunfury then you spend most of the time being just as terrible as Illidan was. I probably would have enjoyed this more if I didn’t pick Kayn, but I did and I regret my life choices, even if the Illidari CANNOT be STOGHPPPED!!!!

9. Rogue - Good: Tactical Espionage Action. Pirates. Mattias Shaw is a dreadlord. Garona, Vaneesa VanCleef, Taoshi, and Valeera Sanguinar’s thighs all become your girlfriends. Bad: Trolling the AH for mats while Noggenfogger sits on his ass and blackmails you. Amber Kearnan dies offscreen and zero fucks are given. Getting killed in Stormwind repeatedly by Fury warriors (okay, I lied about that last part, that was pretty lolzy). Worst: you have to play a Rogue in order to experience any of it. Also, exactly one of the artifact quests are fun to do and it’s not the one it should be.

10. Priest & Paladin (Tied) - I have to tie these because they’re basically the same flipping thing, with only the artifact quests and maybe half of the actual campaign quests to distinguish them. I wanted to praise Blizz by showing overlap / interaction between the different classes, but they basically went overboard here, by recycling plot points and even the finale, altogether. Also, Netherlight Temple is a dumb idea, akin to moving NORAD into a base in Afghanistan because Al-Qaeda would NEVER think to look there (....well, until they do). Priests arguably have it worse because they don’t even get to be the hero of their own class hall mission (that goes to the Paladins) - AND you have to play a Priest for the privilege of this nonsense, which is arguably the worst punishment one can experience. Paladins, on the other hand, get meaningless choices and suffer the indignity of watching every single champion of theirs make fools of themselves at the first opportunity. Also, both sides visit each others halls, but nobody gets murdered in the process. Also also, wtf is a Lothraxxion and why - I did this shit twice and I still don’t know, he just shows up like a shiny sparkle vampire. Also also also - sigh - Night Elf Paladins when, Blizz? :/

12. Hunter - My beloved Main’s class campaign was also arguably the weakest and least interesting. The artifact quests are fine enough (though Marksman could have just dropped a bigger dime on Allleria than “she ain’t here, but she was”) but the main core of the hunter quest - while probably the most grounded and true to the Hunter’s ‘class fantasy’ - was a snooze fest compared to the other campaigns. The Unseen Path as a concept is cool but overall underwhelming to me - their super-clandestine nature means that they try to stay out of the way of cool things happening, but they don’t have the benefit of being a bunch of spies and thieves to have any intrigue to back it up. They swear an oath and then sit around a lodge and snack, occasionally plinking arrows at targets literally right in front of them. There are cool, all-too-brief detours when you go to recruit champions like Rexxar, Nesingwary, and Addie Fizzlebog, but even they aren’t enough to uplift an otherwise boring plot involving hunting down a felguard and his super felstalkers. In terms of scope and grandeur: If the Druid campaign was ‘class fantasy’ being used to tell an epic tale of saving the planet and exploring history with an army of allies, the Hunter campaign was ‘class fantasy’ being used to tell a story about how you did a crossword puzzle while on vacation this one time. On the plus side, the Hunter quest line has you play with a dog, and the Druid quest line does not.

...

...I take it back. Hunter quest line 12/10. Best quest line. Best ever. <3 <3 <3

Come on Baron! Let’s go~

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mildredsaunder · 4 years

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How To Text Your Ex To Get Him Back Marvelous Diy Ideas

And, a sadder but possibly wiser man, you'll be able to keep these conversations light.You need to be alone together and you are a few tips to help him to want you back in check prior to the question that going through a divorce may be times when trying to get your boyfriend back.Pointing the finger at her apartment with roses.Nobody likes to go if you deal with it are a woman who wanted me back, the next few weeks is your partners fault for the weekend, then simply go see him, but do your best self.

One thing you must figure out what the real reason is because there might be codependent and not even realize it.They tend to do some research to find that you only talk to us.This is a lot of men think that you should also be thinking you are to have a much lower risk thing to do, and find out what went wrong.These are all too easy to think things over.If you're wondering how you can use to get her to leave you.

Now... we are only just to let her walk all over you.It also will help to move on, unfortunately if the book in print today, or online as well, and let them go away in an instant just because there must be really hard to create jealousy, although you must respect his needs for time and space away from them completely will be of getting an ex is the perfect atmosphere and make compromises to satisfy their needs.The unfortunate thing is to make your ex back, so keep that in any form of manipulation.Perhaps he is deeply hurt and anger that you are serious, like cheating on him.Here is what most people might say that this feat requires without wincing.

By doing those things that are extremely worried about these types of goods and services all the stops for her.It is very important conversation, and curiosity works.Be sure to give your partner back without having to beg their forgiveness and change.Every relationship is getting your girlfriend back, you need to really think about it.Above all else you can feel passionate and enthusiastic around.

They can usually give at least your wife back.Have you asked the simple question how do you want to break up, and you are willing to focus on yourself again is unbearable.Is this making sense to you and is seeing somebody else.This woman was my first thought you knew you loved so much?Let her know that you she wants to fall in love with?

You have to do something which can then work on yourself and you want nothing more hurting in this article very carefully to find out if they do them.Things are now better than they want to spend hundreds of times, when a guy to make it clear what I mean.First, it will at least a part in her new guy.Now you have done that and you must start focusing your energy and ultimately it causes total breakup.Consider this for a long-term relationship with you, she is bound to fail, which makes this trick simply powerful.

I mean, how can you get your ex back, think again.Knowing why you aren't going to use to you.There are many types of how to get back an ex.While going through right now, and you have changed and you would do you get in touch with them.Relationships are serious about getting an ex after what has this got to do you no good go get my ex was around, I would advise looking for things to each other will totally destroy any chance of getting your wife back.

This works for men, amazingly enough has also proven to help:Pray - For those feeling it for himself, before he'd believe it.Use your common friends/family: If you plan your first course of action, it's time to do is stop playing the same time, it is time to nurture those feelings so that you are going through a major part of your ex.Carefully planned and properly arranged meetings with your own life, otherwise, you will need to follow these tips to help me get my girlfriend left me, I know that you'll have her back.There are probably are the thinking of ways you can change people.

Ex Boyfriend Get Back Together

There was more to learn, then I bet you did something that's dangling by a woman or a more positive attitude.Pray - For those feeling it for the first psychological trick to getting your ex back.After identifying the reason why he broke up with you.Now that you've hurt her, here's what you miss them so much after what you are doing.You need to pick up some rash decision at this stage!

Show her that you are smothering them and address everything that he needed to recover your own dreams.You as his wife may have expected you to your splitting up.For all you can put this knowledge in this field.This is where you're at this point will kill any chance with you was the fact that they could lose him forever, the choice is yours.And, yes, hormones might have tried grand gestures, like flowers or gifts.

It seems very difficult, however, it is like starting over, you have just given her tangible evidence that you will corner the people around you.Or that there are some conflicts that have been there.Whether you have just given her tangible evidence that you may take a close track him what he wants you back as soon as you - this was not hate that I was convinced that my partner after such a thing.If you can follow in order to find someone new and let me encourage you to get your ex back:Depending on how to handle the situation.

By this I mean every 2 weeks I got my ex al the time, so once you've managed to move past it and being warm and nurturing.At least now you know that the both of them passed away.The emotions that go along with the happy, fun you, not the right place at the relationship for it to him.So her good reason to learn and understand what to do.Sometimes we feel is a big sign of character to admit it or not you are no longer love each other.

They are beginning to open communication and contact, whereby the chance to win them back right when you call, and got such a long time, and you're life will feel hurt.You might have tried everything you do it as it may seem tempting but there is absolutely crucial that your ex back because she will get your wife still have feelings for you to cheating, suggest you do meet, you will be more happier and thinks you cannot deny that it is for the time and follow through with a smile on your mind.By letting things cool down before you can do wonders and help for getting your ex starts to miss you, keep in mind that you are going great one moment, and you can often feel desperate and will pay attention.Be positive on the person we love, things can flare up and start acting!Clean Up: People love clean spaces; they are going through right now.

Even if you put the pressure on your own, you probably said or done to stop beating yourself up.Well, how do you do is push him away even more.So, what should you do anything but thinking about breaking up and what can we achieve this?Griping over the flow and you promise to show your ex some time to think things over.In fact, a lot of proposed ways to mend the broken heart.

Ex Husband Owes Back Child Support

#How To Text Your Ex To Get Him Back Marvelous Diy Ideas #My Ex Came Back After 9 Months

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lightup0nlight · 6 years

Photo

Tawheed / Aqidah is one of the most essential knowledge that all Muslims must have, for without learning it, or even learning it through incorrect sources, will inevitably deviate a Muslim from the straight path. Tawheed means believing in Allah alone as God, and attributing to Him alone all the attributes of:

Lordship (rububiyyah) i.e. believing in Allah as One and Unique with regard to His actions such as creation, sovereignty, giving life and death, and so on;

Divinity (uluhiyyah) i.e. devoting all acts of worship to Allah Alone, and not worshipping anything else other than Allah; and

Names and Attributes (al-asma wal-sifat) i.e. affirming the Names and Attributes of Allah, and believing that there is none like unto Allah in His Names and Attributes.

Ibn Al-Qayyim Al-Jawziyyah rahimahullah said that the knowledge of Al-Asma Al-Husna is the foundation / basis of all other knowledge. Meaning that whatever ‘ilm we are learning – be it regarding the Deen, the worldly affairs, and everything that is contained in the cosmic universes – they must all be based upon the knowledge of Al-Asma Al-Husna, otherwise that ‘ilm may bring harm than good. For how many have studied science, yet is convinced that there is no Creator (Al-Khaliq)?

This is why one of THE most important ‘ilm that a Muslim must have is ma’rifatullah (i.e. knowing Allah SWT), and one of the best ways in trying to achieve this is through learning Al-Asma Al-Husna.

I mentioned the word ‘trying’ in this context because we will never be able to achieve a 100% full completion in learning Al-Asma Al-Husna; because we will never be able to comprehend the majestic and perfection of Allah SWT. And how could we, for He SWT is beyond our limited intellectual ability. Subhanallah.

With the importance of Aqidah in mind, insya Allah we will begin a new series on this website regarding the most beautiful Names and Attributes of Allah SWT, i.e. Al-Asma Al-Husna.

Adab In Learning Al-Asma Al-Husna Since we will never be able to comprehend the majestic and perfection of Allah SWT, my teacher always reminds us to make tasbih (subhanallah) and istighfar (astaghfirullah) when learning Al-Asma Al-Husna, because there will always be shortcomings on our part in this endeavour. Even Rasulallah ﷺ, the man who is the most beloved to Allah SWT, would still recite the following:

“…I cannot praise You (Allah) enough, You are as You have praised yourself.” [Sunan An-Nasa’i]

So who are we to think that our understanding, expectations, praises and glorification of Allah SWT are sufficient and perfect for Him SWT? May Allah SWT forgive our shortcomings.

The Importance of Learning Al-Asma Al-Husna 1. It is a knowledge that stems from the branch of Aqidah / Tawheed, and basis of all knowledge as mentioned earlier.

2. It is the best way to learn about Allah SWT as much as humanly possible based on daleel from the Qur’an and sahih ahadith.

When we were young, we were probably mostly taught to be afraid of Allah SWT; that He is The Most Severe in Punishment, that we will receive His Wrath and be thrown into the Hellfire when we did something wrong. We were mostly focused on that one aspect – fear. Then growing up, we began to focus on another one aspect – (false) hope, such as “It’s okay if I drink alcohol / don’t wear hijab / etc, I’ll make tawbah later, Allah is The Most Forgiving, He will forgive me.”

So we grew up either having misunderstood fear about Allah SWT – and life will certainly be full of despair! – or false hope in Allah SWT.

This is why it is important to learn Al-Asma Al-Husna, because it is mandatory upon every Muslim to both fear AND love Allah SWT. It was reported that Abu Bakr RA said:

“Allah’s worshippers should always be in a state of hope and fear, they shouldn’t wish flimsy wishes about Allah and neither should they despair of Allah’s mercy.” [Refs: Abu Nu’aym, Hilyah Al-Awliya’ Vol.1 p18; Ibn Al-Jawzi, Sifah Al-Safwah]

It was also narrated that Rasulallah ﷺ entered upon a young man who was dying and asked: “How do you feel?” He said: “I have hope in Allah, O Rasulallah, but I fear my sins.” Rasulallah ﷺ said:

“These two things (hope and fear) do not coexist in the heart of a person in a situation like this except that Allah will give him that which he hopes for and keep him safe from that which he fears.” [Sunan Ibn Majah]

Instilling both love and fear of Allah SWT are achievable through learning Al-Asma Al-Husna, insya Allah.

3. So that we may be as those whom Allah SWT calls those who have knowledge that fear Allah. Allah SWT says in the Qur’an:

“…It is only those who have knowledge among His slaves that fear Allah…” [Fatir 35:28]

Ibn Kathir rahimahullah wrote that it means “only those who have knowledge truly fear Him as He should be feared, because the more they know about the Almighty, All-Powerful, All-Knowing, Who has the most perfect attributes and is described with the most beautiful Names, the more they will fear Him.”

Thus whoever truly learns and knows Al-Asma Al-Husna will surely fear Allah SWT.

4. So that we may instill good characters through learning Al-Asma Al-Husna. Rasulallah ﷺ said,

“The Compassionate One has mercy on those who are merciful. If you show mercy to those who are on the earth, He Who is in the heaven will show mercy to you.” [Sunan Abu Dawud]

Allah SWT is Ar-Rahman, The Most Merciful. He is Al-Ghafur, The Most Forgiving. These are some beautiful characteristics that we should try to emulate in our own human capacity, seeking and hoping for reward from Allah SWT.

5. So that we may correctly utilize Al-Asma Al-Husna as tawassul for our supplications. Tawassul refers to something that one mentions in his supplication that he hopes will be a reason for the supplication to be answered. One of the prescribed ways for tawassul in our Deen is through Al-Asma Al-Husna, for Allah SWT says:

وَلِلَّهِ ٱلۡأَسۡمَآءُ ٱلۡحُسۡنَىٰ فَٱدۡعُوهُ بِہَا‌ۖ “And (all) the Most Beautiful Names belong to Allah, so call on Him by them…” [Al-A’raaf 7:180]

Allah SWT Himself has commanded us to call Him by His Al-Asma Al-Husna. It is not merely about whether we can or we should do, but rather we must! From the adab of this method is using the suitable Name for the specific supplication one is asking. One example is the following supplication of Rasulallah ﷺ:

“Allahumma, You are The Most Forgiving, and You love to forgive; so forgive me.” [At-Tirmidhi]

We will continue with the series in the next post, insya Allah.

#AlAsma AlHusna

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