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d-lissa · 11 months

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Liveblogging TMA - Season 3 - MAG 86-90

"Sure. If you ignore all the corpses. And the monsters. And the disappearances."

TUCKED IN :

That one makes me think of "A Sturdy Lock". Of course, whatever concept behind it is probably The Darkness, or whatever it is called, but the ... Modus Operandi, if you could call it that, of this one definitely remind me of that other statement. I guess I have my answer as to why the old man managed to survive by locking a room that didn't have a lock.

He probably was actually hallucinating this part, but this is also probably what saved him for so long from the darkness. And after a moment, maybe he got used to it, to the point that believing that the door was locked and that the thing wouldn't ever enter probably was enough of a relief to stop being scared.

Talk about upsetting.

Speaking of upsetting, Tim is bitter, but what else is new, Melanie is kind of awesome in that bitchy way of hers, but what else is new, and Martin is very gay, but what else is new.

But hey, at least Melanie will know things now, which is good. She will make a good spy. Or, well, she would've had if she wasn't probably being set up by Elias to die an awful and painful death.

Cheers.

THE UNCANNY VALLEY :

"She was silent as I left, and seemed as though she was trying to get over some sort of shock."

... Ok, so. First of all, Sebastian Skinner ?

An absolute legend. I stan.

Secondly, I dont think I'll ever be able to hear that circus music without any hint of panic going through my system ever again.

Jude Perry sounds like an ... Interesting character. Was she the one with Agnes in "Burning Desire", maybe ?

Whatever Orsinov and her circus are, they're obviously a part of The Stranger, which is apparently out for Jon now ! How lovely. And their goal is to bring about a ... New World ? Maybe one where their concept rules over it all in broad delight. Something that would very likely destroy humanity.

I guess I know how that apocalypse happens.

Gertrude has obviously worked on stopping it for quite a while, while also trying to destroy the Archive, and she got injured, apparently ?

A new concept came in, called The Devastation, which ... Puts a lot of things in perspective, actually. And it is allied to The Lightless Flame ? The Lightless Flame is the burning, obviously, but then is The Devastation the darkness ?

Until we get more information on each of those, I will keep myself from making a list of what I think each concept impacted which episode.

Georgie is a sweet heart, and with every passing episode, I fear more and more for her life. Meanwhile, Jon needs a nap. A very long one, for a few days at least.

Before he starts doing something stupid like seeking out the burning lady that laughed at the pain of some guy, you know ?

Yeah.

The list of episods probably linked to The Devastation, if it is the darkness :

"A Father's Love"

"Growing Dark"

"A Sturdy Lock" (?)

"Exceptional Risk"

"The End of the Tunnel"

"Police Lights"

"Tucked In"

DIG :

"A hollow space that all eyes point towards. And I intend to reach it, if my fingers don’t give out first."

Oh.

Oh, I do not like this.

Ok, so new Leitner, there's something hidden underneath the Archives, and the calliope disappeared.

Is there anything good happening ever into this whole situation ? Anything ? Not even actually good, but just not with absolutely sickening implications.

Basira is worried and looking for Daisy, and it sounds like she's worried Daisy might kill Jon, which. Fair, if she wasn't so mad at Elias. Actually, I could see her killing Jon just to pose a problem to Elias who seemed pretty adament to keep Jon. Not keep him safe, probably not, but keep him alive in general.

And Martin sounded kind of ... Jealous ? Of Basira ? When she talked about liking Jon and how he was pretty alright and funny when you know him better, so like. I feel like it hit a spot ?

God, I am loving the character work being done on everyone. Like, yes, yes, the horror is good, but it certainly wasn't my favourite aspect of it, and I have been so eager to learn more about who these people are for so long, something that the last two seasons only mostly gave in the finale.

TWICE AS BRIGHT :

"The audience is only safe when the story isn’t about them."

... Welp, guess he did seek out the burning lady.

Alright.

Fuck me, I guess.

I mean, I get it, the man is desperate, and is apparently compelled by his "god" to seek knowledge and information, probably even at the expanse of his health and safety, but still. When I said that his curiosity will be the death of him, I didn't expect it to be so spot on.

But marvelous piece of insight into the lore of the concepts, I am living for it.

Jonathan can apparently compel people to tell him what he wants to know which is just, really amazing and fitting, and also probably explained Daisy's first appearance. And why she'd hate him as much as she does, for forcing her to say all of this that she never intended to mention to anyone else.

Still, I kind of feel sorry for the lack of possible abilities to manifest in the real world, rather than the psychic one, to protect him from literal fire people and just death and danger in general.

Jude had a very interesting tale to tell, as well as what her god is like, The Desolation, while The Eye got a new title in "Ceaseless Watcher", which is fitting too.

I can see why something named The Desolation would pair up with The Devastation. The differences between the two concept are rather rare, as I feel like they are pretty similar, but I assume that where The Devastation just wants to destroy everything, The Desolation just seeks make people feel it, which would quite easily happen through the means of destruction.

So, similar, but not the same, despite their overlaps.

I can't say that the derision Jude feels toward The Eye makes a lot of sense to me. I mean, yes, the thing doesn't act, but knowledge is pretty powerful in and of itself, especially to the people that are willing to use it.

Of course, I guess that it sounds kind of laughable to someone able to burn someone into a crisp at a snap of her fingers.

Next up on "The Misadventures and Tortures of Jonathan Sims", we are to meet Michael Crew. How very.

I guess that the way to worship The Eye is the statements ? Information in general, maybe ? It would explain why Jon feels so compelled to making them, despite knowing that they're not good for him. That this entire situation is not good for him.

I joke about him being a dumbass, but he doesn't really have a choice, does he ?

He just has to know.

Even if it destroys him.

The list of episods probably linked to The Desolation :

"Burned Out"

"First Aid"

"Burnt Offering"

"Section 31"

"Pest Control"

"Recluse"

"Burning Desire"

"The Uncanney Valley"

"Twice as Bright"

BODY BUILDER :

"But when I looked in the mirror I still didn’t see what I wanted to."

Tim is, as usual, the only one genre savy in this entire fucking Archive. Not in the sense that everyone else just doesn't get it, more like they stopped struggling against it. Stubborn. I like that in a man.

Although, it doesn't feel like Martin is really getting what is happening around him. You know, the tapes always recording whenever anything of interest happens, the speculations, the compelment to stay, to the point where you feel miserable when you aren't.

At least Jon is still doing his duties as The Archivist. I guess that keeps him from feeling any of that ?

Jared is back, and I am still confused at whatever the whole deal is with his Leitner. Like, what concept does he follow ? I think it is probably similar to the one behind all of the meat and cannibalism, but I can't even be sure.

I am feeling that body dysmorphia though. What an unpleasant feeling, when your own flesh and skin feels alien to you, when you can't ever be satisfied by what it is, to the point you'll destroy yourself reaching for that perfection that won't ever exist.

Makes for a pretty good horror story, quite frankly.

The quote of the post will be :

"The blanket never did anything"

End Liveblogging.

#tma #the magnus archive #liveblogging #liveblog-tma

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seasurfacefullofclouds1 · 2 years

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https://longreads.com/2017/02/22/how-david-bowie-came-out-as-gay-and-what-he-meant-by-it/

It doesn’t really matter what his sexuality is. It is about selling what is the most attractive to whom. This is why when people go into debates about being an ally etc. I feel they are lacking an understanding of the basics. It’s about making a sale and nothing more. It’s not about music or social justice. Anyway hopefully this makes sense.

It’s a long read but to me, the Azoff’s modelled Harry’s career on exactly this (David Bowie) His Larrie background really helped. That is why there was first xander then Mitch, it had nothing to do with coming out. This article is exactly what they based his whole marketing plan on. He is everything to everyone.

Not only is Harry’s public persona extremely cynical, but it’s the HSHQ modus operandi to copy others. Nothing is original. You can track the copying from day 1 of solo Harry.

#harry styles

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goddamnwebcomics · 5 months

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5 Unsolved Webcomic Mysteries

Webcomics and unanswered questions go as well together as webcomics and lesbians, webcomics and furries, webcomics and dragons, webcomics and extreme lack of nuance, you get the idea. Most of the time it's because of bad mystery mongering, other times it's because the creator makes such a baffling choice, you question what is the reason behind it all, a hidden Modus Operandi. We here at GW love to speculate so I compiled some old webcomic mysteries into one article. This both includes mysteries in-universe as well as more meta mysteries.

5. Was Colonel Glass really Marilyn's father?

Spinnerette doesn't have that many unanswered questions, aside from "What happened to Mecha Maid's ALS?", mainly because that would imply that there is a linear narrative, when at this point it's just Kraw making bunch of oneshots meant to satisfy his ego, his bank account and his penis. There however was a time there was some semblance of continuity, there was a world, there was fucking conflict, and that was Colonel Glass arc. I've told time and time again how this arc was sort of the end of old Spinnerette, and while it wasn't treated as a major mystery, there was one intriguing question that really only came up once during the whole trilogy, Mecha Maid at one point speculates that Colonel Glass was her biological father. This is because Glass has been around since Marilyn was just a baby. Later when the two koreans meet again, Glass shows remorse and agreement when Mecha Maid expresses her hatred of war. This bizarre moment could be a clue that Glass knows that he is in fact Mecha Maid's father but this is just a theory because quite frankly that moment came out of nowhere and was just contradictory for the sake of MYSTERY OOOO BETCHA DIDN'T SEE THIS COMING VIEWERS. Now, Colonel Glass is pretty much persona non grata in the main comic. Of course, there is the White Heron sidecomic, but I doubt that comic will bother to answer this question.

My personal theory is that Colonel Glass isn't Mecha Maid's father because that would be stupid. Mecha Maid doesn't have any special powers of her own, she got her ALS because she got bumped on her head as a baby, and Marilyn's adoptive dad was a tech guru so he probably helped Marilyn to learn how to build her suit of armor. Considering that Kraw has forgotten all about Marilyn's ALS, I don't think he remembers this plot point either.

4. Was Randall supposed to be gay?

Soulkat is probably the only webcomic writer in this blog whose brainlessness and lack of any talent gives Kraw serious competition. Now with Las Lindas having too many cooks in the kitchen, it's certain that there are a lot of contrasting visions regarding the comic. Characters often debut real quickly and become part of the unlikable cast in a matter of minutes. Randall was like this, he just appeared during the harvest festival and kinda stuck around, only later we got the whole ordeal with him being childhood friend of Mora and the rushed love interest for Taffy. Randall had potential to be one decent character in a cast of assholes, but then he was rushed into a relationship with Taffy and that's it. The reason for this rush was because Soulkat was pissed when people assumed that Randall might be GAY! GASP! EVERYBODY KNOWS LESBIANS ARE MORE HOT I MEAN PROFITABLE I MEAN RELATABLE.

So yeah, if Randall wasn't supposed to be gay, then why was he so, I hate to use this word but everyone uses it nowadays so I have to use it too and I can't think of a better word, gay-coded? I mean he was a good-looking dude who had affinity for shopping, dancing and fishing. Not saying every gay person is into that, but back in those days, "gay-coding" was known as "stereotyping", wait, I should've used that word instead. Either way, Randall was a really well-written character but once again, he was pretty much molded into yet another Mora asskisser with no personality as soon as he and Taffy locked eyes. So, was he meant to be gay but Soulkat's homophobia eventually won out so he was quickly rushed into a relationship because godforbid NOBODY in this comic is allowed to be single???

My personal theory is that, I hate to say it, Randall was always meant to be straight. Randall is not the only character who was decent at first but then got ruined almost immediately as soon as he stepped on that fucking farm. There were many characters who started out as likable, Miles, Rachel, Alejandra and so forth, only to get ruined overtime. The entire reason Randall was rushed into relationship was definitely because of Soulkat being afraid that people thought he was gay. Maybe if he is gay, maybe make him gay, or even bisexual. That being said even if he was gay he definitely would have been ruined anyway. He certainly wasn't gonna be Burke.

3. Did Tiffany change her mind about Chel killing Trasik?

While far from being a talentless hack, Tiffany has sometimes made some very questionable decisions. And sadly, she did two massive plot twists that permanently damaged Alien Dice within a short timespan. We'll talk about the second one today, the one I consider to be the worst plot twist I've encountered on this blog. It's a real shame too because it ruined probably the best scene in the entire comic. After seeing Trasik get away with her bullshit for too long, Chel grabs a spear and impales Trasik just when she is about to stab Lexx. However, we get our first sign that something isn't right when suddenly she loses her pupils and injects Lexx with lethal poison as her final move before passing away. Then few pages later we learn Trasik was a mimic ALL ALONG until this point, and the real Trasik disappeared at some point before Chel was kidnapped. We will not talk about real Trasik's whereabouts as I feel this comic will provide an unsatisfying answer to that, but instead let's talk about what drove Tiffany to do this plot twist. I've reread this arc, and there is virtually zero foreshadowing unless it's extremely subtle. Literally any hints of Trasik being a mimic only pick up AFTER Chel stabs her. That leads to only one conclusion, Tiffany might have wanted Chel to originally kill Trasik here but changed her mind at the last minute, likely she was afraid that Chel killing someone would make readers hate Chel. I can safely say that anyone with a brain would see that Chel didn't kill a person, she killed a monster.

Yet Tiffany, afraid of a backlash, went ahead and did the "she was a mimic all along" plot twist anyway, giving us another pointless mystery and not even bothering to address the other questions like what happened to the kids Trasik trafficked? How has Trasik not found out about Lexx's family living next to her for all these years? Why didn't Riley tell Lexx and Chel ANYTHING about Trasik being a mimic despite knowing it all along? Whatever, all of those questions are irrelevant, the only question that matters is, did Tiffany come to a last second decision to change the scene?

My personal theory is, abso-fucking-lutely she did. While I can see her wanting to not foreshadow Lexx's mom being alive all along just for the sake of a shock, there is NO reason for this twist to happen without any hints of Trasik's true identity. Writing webcomics is a careful job. It's a real shame that even after she worked so hard to make Trasik so goddamn hateable, she still regretted having Chel kill someone so she pulled that bullshit twist to avoid imaginary backlash. It's not too late to pull a doubletwist that Riley only claimed Trasik was a mimic to not get ADC on Chel's ass for murder or something, but that would only cover half the damage.' ass for murder or something, but that would only cover half the damage.

2. What was the original plan for Siegfried?

Whether it's Siggy having more fangirls than Deegan or people wanting Luna dead over him, the decision of making Siegfried Derek Chauvin of Dominion will always be one of the biggest Character Assassinations in this blog's history. I've talked about Siegfried's sudden racism buff so many times, let's just talk about something that DIDN'T happen. Let's say that Dominic Deegan's fans don't piss Mookie off, what was originally going to happen to Siegfried during War In Hell arc? Was he still going to be the one that was supposed to die? Were his noble acts in Battle of Barthis genuine instead of motivated by Jayden's pussy? And most importantly, was he going to still be racist against orcs?

My personal theory is, I want to believe Siggy wasn't going to die because it would be unnecessary. I don't think Deegan would've vomited if someone who was a racist piece of shit was going to die. Remember this was the arc when Klo Tark inexplicably returned with his angel brother form? I think him vomiting was about his second death all along, because he and Deegan were really close. Maybe too close.

As for what happens to Siggy, I think he would've had some bias against orcs but it would be established his racism is because of his father, but eventually learns about his father's atrocities, which horrifes him. it's not an instant redemption, and the other orcs don't want to talk to him because of his daddy's lynchings, but he might actually go as far as leave his position as a knight in protest of his position. I believe he was going to play the role of Rembrandt in March Across Maltak. He ends up falling in love with an orc, and completes his redemption arc as he learns how the suffering of orcs is his father's fault, and ends up staying in Maltak as the guardian of the Crone.

While not exactly a perfect redemption arc I still think it's way better than what Mookie did in the actual comic.

1. How was Gene Catlow going to end?

This will be a mystery that will never get an answer, due to the tragic passing of Albert Temple. We do know that Gene Catlow was likely going to conclude very soon after the current arc, with one last arc. The only major events that would've happened before the end are Mason's stupid redemption, Michelle's birth, Forzoi's punishment of Matt, Gene and Catwhis's son's birth, battle against CGI Cats and possibly everyone answering the call of Friendship Island. But other than that, even when you read 16 years of his comic, Albert continues to be unpredictable. Nobody can just connect the dots and claim this is what Albert would've wanted. For example, I have no idea if Forzoi would've actually redeemed Matt or just punished him, and what would've become of Cydnee. And that's not even getting into the rest of the cast, and if Family Too Stupid to Live was gonna go global. It's a real shame honestly.

My personal theory is, I have none. I can hypothesize but I can never truly figure out how was Albert Temple going to conclude his life project, and just how many more years was it gonna go on. Not to mention Albert was still going to write one-offs focusing on other characters after the end of main comic. Hell, it's possible World of Friends wouldn't have happened at all, but instead was implied to be a thing that would happen eventually. If someone were to take over Albert's site and write the ending themselves, I would be against it and not consider it the official ending. Some questions are better off left unanswered.

#article thingy

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ultraclops · 3 years

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I told ya

Days 7 and 8: Struggles & Freedom!

This one is based on my own experiences as an ace person, so I'm gonna slap a content warning for aphobia on this one.

[CW: Aphobia, s*x mention, ableism]

[Note: the red text boxes aren't any canon character, they just represent negativity towards aspec people]

[Dialogue transcript:

How do you know you're ace if you haven't had s*x?

But you'll have to have s*x some time!

You'll get over it eventually.

A relationship without s*x is meaningless!

Do you even love?

You just need to find that special someone!

But you're too attractive to be ace!

SCREW Y'ALL!

I'M ACE AND PROUD!

End transcript]

As I said in the intro, this comic is inspired by my experiences as an ace person. For a long as I can remember I've never felt s*xual attraction, nor enjoyed anything related to s*x (such as smut, NSFW art, mature movies, etc.). At first I thought it was normal, until I realized everyone else didn't feel the same way as I did. At first I figured it may be due to my neurodiversity, but my siblings are neurodivergent and they experience s*xual attraction. That's when I discovered that I was asexual!

The first person I openly told I was ace was a therapist I had while I was in foster care. She proceeded to invalidate me, saying that I'd just get over it and that I'd have to have s*x some time. It pained me to be utterly ridiculed by someone who's job was to make me feel better - but then again, this was the same woman who told me straight to my face that I couldn't possibly have PTSD because I was only physically abused for 16 years and she saw her best friend die in a car accident. Trauma ain't a goddamn contest, people.

I've seen plenty of aphobia online and offline, such as people framing our sexuality as if it's a "choice", something we'll "grow out of" or that we'll change our minds if we meet "that someone". I didn't make the choice to be born without s*xual attraction. I'm 20 - going on 21 - and I'm still asexual. I've dated like 3 guys in my lifetime, and - guess what! - I'm still asexual. It's exhausting to see other LGBT+ people spew out the same rhetoric against aspecs that was used against gay, lesbian, bi, pan, trans and nonbinary people without so much as thinking "Hey, isn't this a little f*cked up?"

So you know what? I'm ace. I'm s*x-repulsed and abstinent. My orientation isn't a decision that I can just change on a whim. S*x =/= love, LOVE = love. I'm ace, and I'm goddamn proud of it!

Tangent over, now why I chose Mao specifically:

Hehehehe projecting onto comfort character go brrrrrr

Mao doesn't really seem like the type of guy to be preoccupied with the thought of starting a family or anything along those lines - if anything he's just focused on becoming a legend, and the only family he makes is the family he finds along the way. He treats Adorabat like his own daughter and expresses grief when she's hurt or taken away from him, even if she's not his flesh-and-blood.

In Meet Tanya Keys, when Tanya keeps mock-flirting with him he barely reacts - if anything, he looks uncomfortable. He does blush briefly when Adorabat asks if he likes Tanya, but that doesn't exactly mean that they dated in the past - he's blushed out of embarrassment several times prior to this episode. Before you go "He told the King he loved him!" or "Then why couldn't he stop thinking about BC?", love =/= s*x. Also in Enemy Mime he makes fun of BC for flirting with the Mimic Blob sooo–

Not to be stereotypical or anything but I just really think it fits his straightforward, no-nonsense personality. "Why would I do that when there's monsters to slay, criminals to capture and people to save?" is probably his modus operandi

Literally the only suggestive joke he makes is about a tray of cobbler. I'm not saying ace people don't make s*x jokes (because I do too sometimes) but if this guy only jokes about screwing cobbler what makes you think he'll screw another person

Tangent no. 2, aside, had fun on this! Had fun on all my art for this contest honestly, but this one especially because purple and katana. I'm an ace that loves purple and katanas. I'm a walking stereotype.

Also for the bottom pose, I referenced the scene from Weapon Of Choice when he uses the Lunar Lash for the second time! Nice image 👌

#maomaosprideweek2021 #maomaoprideweek2021 #mmprideweek2021 #mao mao #my sketches #comic #lunar lash #hahah ace lunar lash go brrrr #mmhoph #//aphobia #// aphobia #//sex ment #// sex ment #//ableism #// ableism

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bitegore · 4 years

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this is kinda just a regurgitation of thoughts, and please bear in mind that i haven’t slept in about 24 hours right now, but:

the transmisogyny exempt thing like...

[waves hands]

transmisogyny is a fundamental part of a patriarchal power structure. agreed? yes? if you don’t agree with me, just pretend you do for the moment and use that as the thing you are basing the understanding of the rest of my argument on, because i think transmisogyny is directly and fundamentally baked into a patriarchal power structure; mostly because I’ve been told so and seen it to be true.

so obviously the target of transmisogyny is trans women. no argument there.

but i don’t think it’s as simple as “trans women are the only ones who ever face transmisogyny and no one else,” simply because that’s not how prejudices and direct forms of oppression work?

like um- and this is going to be a flawed example, of course, because i cant think of any that aren’t, but if i compare transmisogyny to anti-Black racism, because another power structure we live under is the one that race is.... you wouldn’t say anyone who is not Black is “anti-Black racism exempt” exactly? anti-Black racism still carries over, in smaller forms sometimes but not always, to people who do not perform non-Blackness properly. i dont know how to say that in a way that makes more sense, but like- if you don’t look “white enough,” or you dont talk “white enough”, or you associate too much with Black people, you may be subject to anti-Black racism in spite of not necessarily being Black. it’s better for the sake of looking at racism to see it as a societal trend, and it is easier in this context to discuss it in terms of who is what race rather than who is exempt from what kind of racism. It hurts everyone that doesn’t fit the perfect ideal of the people in the “power” part of the power structure.

As far as I can tell, transmisogyny is the same way. Trans women get hit with transmisogyny the hardest; I will absolutely not argue that, because it is true. but transmisogynistic arguments, specifically, come up in a lot of discussion about basically any amab person’s performance of gender if they are not doing it the way that the patriarchal society we live in is right, and sometimes in afab or intersex people’s lives as well. I am pretty sure I remember my first introduction to the term ‘transmisogynistic’ being on a discussion of anti- gay man propaganda. In that case, it makes more sense to talk about transmisogyny in terms of a power structure, and not just “you do not fit the qualifications for trans woman or transfeminine, so you are tme”

also i have just seen tme be used as a bludgeon against anyone who the writer wants to shut up but i choose to believe that’s a bad faith argument used by some and popularized by people who think it’s common, rather than a common tactic. I would be absolutely unsurprised if some very controversial “trans women”s blogs turn out to be run by transphobes trying to make trans women look bad and dangerous and unreasonable; i’ve seen it before with other minorities and it just kinda fits the modus operandi.

in conclusion, because this is a big rambling mess, transmisogyny hits lots of people, not only trans women, and excluding anyone who isn’t a trans women from any discussion of transmisogyny with “you’re tme” is counterproductive

#red rambles #tme discourse #is that even a tag? i dont know #i dont really want this going in the main tags anyway lol #this isnt a discourse blog i just get very chatty when tired #and think i know more than i probably actually do

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veridium · 5 years

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just stay here tonight

HEY SO, FRIDAY NIGHT CHAPTER FOR FRIDAY NIGHT? WHO’S WITH ME FOR SOME MAGIC? COLLEGE AU UPDATE COMING AT YOU LIVE!

Get your kleenex out just in case...because...I needed mine...

Episode title brought to you by Augustana and one of my favorite songs from them. :)

fic episode masterpost

Thursday is forgettable, with the exception of the mildly entertaining but all-out cringe of Cullen’s appearance in the dorms. Friday, on the other hand? Non-stop anguish. Not the Greek tragedy kind, per se, but wondering: wondering if she knows just exactly what the fuck she’s doing, primarily. For too long, Olivia has gotten used to people chasing her down for exactly what they want from her, and what she wants from them, and nothing else. Indulging people rather than engaging has been her modus operandi since she was on the edge of seventeen.

So, understandably, Friday evening in preparation for her gambit is...interesting.

After spending a couple hours getting it all ready, and packing up the teeny trunk of her vehicle, the task at hand becomes getting her own ass together. Something that everyone wants to have a say in, apparently. Or, if you’re Sera, a knock on her door followed by a “knock her dead, Liv, wear the spiked stilettos! They’d make a clean kill!”

Then, there are the texts:

Ellinor: Hey dude, let me know how it goes, okay? I wish you’d tell me what you’re doing.

Ellinor: Okay I know you have your own life but it’s also like ⅓ mine so…

Ellinor: Fuck I think Cullen might be one of those people who unironically likes raisinettes…

Ellinor: oh my god I’m sorry this is about you but I’m nervous so I keep blabbering WHY CAN’T YOU JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU’RE DOING SO I DON’T HAVE TO PULL APART THESE RED VINES LIKE A MASOCHIST??

Theia: It doesn’t matter what happens I’m still killing her ok. The bitch has it coming.

Theia: [ CHICAGO . GIF]

Josie: NO YOU ARE NOT. WE HAVE DISCUSSED THIS.

Theia: That...was not meant for group chat. Yikes, sorry babe.

Josie: Right.

Lace: Lol another one for the fuck-up screenshots

Lace: Good gay mojo your way, Liv.

The sentiments are all appreciated, but they don’t really hit home. All alone in her room, putting on makeup and feeling like Mulan in the montage before she rides off to the army, it’s all a wonder as to why Cassandra agreed to go on this escapade. It’s as if she’s been fooled into thinking Olivia has a clue. Or, maybe she’s riding along to witness the impending crash-and-burn. A final act of karmic vindication, perhaps.

She picks out a black tank bodysuit and high-waisted, blue skinny jeans. Besides, where they are going isn’t exactly ‘fine goth attire required.’ However, the one staple that will not be left behind is her black leather jacket. Lacing up her converse and slapping on some gloss, and a hair tie on her wrist, and she’s ready to go.

The walk to their suite is an unfamiliar one, but one Ellinor did enough to be able to tell her off memory where to go. Right down to the number on their door. She should ask Ellinor to make a map, just in case, for teasing purposes -- but she looked too busy on cloud 9 earlier that day thinking about her own plans with Rutherphallus. One day, maybe, she’ll stop calling him by demeaning euphemisms. One day. But that day is not today.

Olivia paces in a weird circle a couple of times just outside the suite, hands on her hips as she does her best to remember she has lungs to breathe with. The actual door, the nice door, the one that looks like it works well and is nicely painted. Dorm room doors aren’t this nice. Crap. She’s quietly holding off an implosion. What if she says no after all this? What if she doesn’t like her outfit? What if she’s mean again? God, she can be mean. But then, she stops. Remembers when Cassandra was cornered in the library, and said with such earnest relief in her face that she felt like she could be herself around her. That Liv didn’t make a big deal of things. Psh, well, that was a misinformed belief. Misinformed but...kind.

Taking one last deep breath, she wipes her palms against her denim and knocks on the door. Within ten seconds, it opens. No monsters or ghosts or natural disasters -- no, it’s her, just her, on her other side. Cassandra, in black jeans and a grey v-neck sweater, and all-black tennis shoes like the ones Olivia would wear in high school, except nicer.

Her heart jumps into her throat as Cassandra grins and steps back. “Hey,” she says, all calm and collected and...and...just...fine.

“Hey,” Olivia gets out, her brows lifted along with her pulse rate. “You...you are awake still!”

“Yeah...you said 11.”

“I did. I did say...11. 11 in the evening. PM. Night...time…” she shakes her head and cuts herself off before she sounds too ridiculous. Maybe it’s too late, though. “Um, yeah. You...ready to head out?”

Cassandra, who’s been watching her feud with herself, only smiles and breaks away from the door. Bless her. “Yeah, I’m good, I just need to grab my coat.’

“Right! Yeah, good idea. Night is cold, and...yep, good call. Smart--”

“Liv.”

She blinks, and realizes she’s been looking off into space while talking. Dammit. “Yeah?”

“You’re not very good this, are you?”

“This...this what?”

Cassandra chuckles, and turns back toward the inside of the suite. “I’ll be right back. Try not to scare the neighbors.” She is back quickly, sliding a dark purple duffle jacket on, keys dangling in her hand as she pulls the door shut behind her and locks it. Olivia rocks on her heels in the meantime, looking down either end of the hall -- not a soul to be seen, for a Friday night -- before Cassandra faces her again.

“Alright, where to?”

“Oh, yeah, my car. It’s...gonna be a little bit of a walk to the parking lot, but, you know the parking pass prices are just...bullshit.”

“Yeah.”

They stand there for another awkward few seconds before Olivia once again has it dawn on her she has to lead the way. Fuck. She kicks herself into gear, and Cassandra follows, staring at her like she’s an animal planet show host taking notes on a creature’s behavior. Or, maybe she’s just...fine...and Olivia feels that. Whatever, same difference, right?

The walk happens silently, save for a few polite smiles whenever one of them opens a door for the other. Oh, and Olivia patting her back pocket to make sure she brought her keys. When they get to the lot, and she sees her valiant steed parked, she feels more at home.

“So, ever ride in a mini with muscle?”

“Excuse me?” Cassandra glances at her as they step onto the asphalt.

Olivia giggles under her breath. “A mini with muscle. You know, one with some….like, ‘oomph’ under the hood?”

“I would not know what ‘oomph’ means, but in your hands, I have my concerns.”

“Hah! Funny, very funny.” They diverge from one another, Cassandra going to the passenger door while Olivia goes around the back. She pulls out her keys and unlocks, sliding in nice and smooth. Cassandra is more polite and careful, but she settles in next to her. She probably doesn't spend much time in small cars. Olivia gets more giddy with anticipation, putting up her hair into a simple ponytail.

“...many concerns,” Cassandra reiterates.

“Psh, what?” Olivia scrunches her nose, her hands falling into her lap. “You think I don’t walk what I talk?”

“No, in fact I’m wondering quite the opposite.”

“Why be afraid of a woman who knows how to handle a good car? I wasn’t afraid of you when we rode on your bike.”

Cassandra rolls her eyes, grabbing for the seat belt. “I am going to go ahead and prepare myself the way I should, since I have a feeling as to how this is going to go should I tease you further. Or if I dare ask where it is you’re taking me at this hour.”

Olivia watches her, and she can’t help but smile. She leans forward with one arm on the wheel, and she sticks the key into the ignition. Turning the car on, she can’t help but love the way the engine purrs.

“Don’t worry, Cass. If I did want to murder you, I’d think of something far more theatrical. Public, with live music and dancing, or something.” she sits back, pulling her own seat-belt on. After that, her hand goes to the stick and her foot to the pedal. In response, Cassandra rests the side of her thigh against her door and plants an elbow on it. She looks unconvinced, or intrigued by something.

“What?”

Cassandra raises a brow. “That is the first time you’ve ever called me Cass. Not Cassandra. Or Pentaghast, for that matter.”

Olivia scoffs, and checks her mirror real quick. “No it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“...Uh, okay, so what? I mean, you want me not to?” she looks over, brow cocked.

Cassandra shrugs and settles in. It’s impossible to know whether she is pleased or displeased by it. Ellinor’s called her Cass, so has Cullen. But it’s a mystery as to whether either of them ever asked about it. But, to her credit, Cassandra looks ahead.

“Do your worst, Olivia.”

Her tongue presses against her smiling teeth, and Olivia feels the engine warm up at last. “With pleasure.”

They drive through town, get on the freeway and past a few exits until Olivia finds the one she’s after. The whole time she is either on par with the speed limits or past them, but once she gets to the outskirts of the county, the traffic goes scarce. Even for a Friday night. A few turns and twists, and she’s on a highway winding incline, up one of the few canyon peaks in the nearby area of rolling hills and flat valleys.

She knows she’s getting close when mostly barren trees start to heavily line the two-lane path, and her mini as always runs like a dream. She has her spotify playing low on the radio, something with a heavy guitar but she can’t quite make out the vocals.

“Well, what do you think?” she asks, as she pulls and hugs tight another sharp turn in the road, engine growling as she accelerates out of it.

Cassandra as far as she has seen, keeps her gaze out the window or on her. Sitting still, but not on edge. “You are asking me for my opinion on your driving?”

Olivia smirks. “I was thinking more about the car, but, I had prepared myself emotionally for your scathing review.” Another turn, this time to the left, and she handles it beautifully. These roads are like the back of her hand, a sight she’s known at all hours and all seasons. Headlights are all she needs.

Cassandra bends her knees a bit more. “I think…” she pauses, while Olivia pulls into what appears to be a destination. Or, rather, a parking lot. “You broke at least three laws in the process, but, I can’t say you don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Agh! Bullshit,” Olivia challenges, a subtle laugh in her tone, “I only broke one. Near the turnpike, that’s it.”

“No, you broke three, the second was speeding, and the third was speeding and--”

“Ohoho,” her laugh continues to bubble as she pulls into a parking spot, the only car in the lot by the looks of it, “I sped? No fucking way!” she gasps, pretending to be astonished.

She pushes the stick into place and yanks up the parking brake. They look at each other, now stopped and still, the car lulling. Cassandra doesn’t look flushed or nervous like other people she’s taken along for rides. Maybe she’s been well-conditioned by everything else; too well-conditioned, to be frightened of a fast car and even faster driver. Olivia can only turn the key back and turn off the car; the headlights go out, and the one above their heads comes on.

“Well,” she exhales, adrenaline still surging in her veins, “we’re here.”

“And where is ‘here’ exactly?”

“A park.”

“A...park?” she looks around, through the windows. Not much to see, though.

“Heh,” Olivia unbuckles herself, “come on, you’ll see what I mean. But I have stuff in the trunk for us.”

“Does it happen to be a shovel and body bag? Or even better, a driver’s ed manual?”

Olivia groans and shoves her door open. “No, I’m afraid those are both in my Barbie pink jeep at home. Resting on the squeaky horn rather comfortably like you are on my last nerve.” She gets out, and Cassandra does too, and for a moment they look at each other over the car roof.

Cassandra unzips her jacket but keeps it on. “Fair enough,” she concedes, and they shut their doors. Venturing into the back trunk, Olivia pulls up the door and finds what she left in there: a basket, with its contents covered by a draped, folded heavy blanket. A two-hand job, but not too bad. She picks it up and manages to pull the door back down, all the while Cassandra stands back somewhat looking like a woman of action left without a an action to commit.

“You need help?”

“No, no,” Olivia teases, hitting the button on her car alarm. The lights flicker and she turns to face her. “I am a capable person, capable of many things besides blatant crime. You just need to trust me.”

“You don’t know what you ask,” Cassandra counters, hands going into her jacket pockets, “but fine, I go where you go.”

“Yes,” Olivia closes in on her, until she’s about a foot away, “and tonight, I go there, over that small bridge and up the trail. Come on!”

More walking, and more silence. It’s weird, just a tad, to be acting so congenial after so much heartache. But on the other hand, it’s something she’s craved the whole time: for them to be as they were, as they could have been, had not her pride or her defenses squandered her good graces. The more time they spend not arguing, or ditching each other, the more Olivia dares to hope it can all be redeemed. As they walk on the dirt and wood chip path with only so much as one iPhone flashlight for a little less than a ¼ mile, she appreciates all Cassandra did to open up to her: all the plans, all the exposure. Because the closer they get to where she wants them to end up, the more nerve-wracking it all becomes. Maybe that’s what’s been making Cassandra chuckle and eye her all evening: she’s watching Liv get a taste of her own medicine.

At last, they come to the top of a hillside, where the view is clear over the city below. The spot is all grass and trail, and what looks to be an old rusty playground at the base of it. No lamp posts, no bike racks, no sidewalk. It’s a bit creepy, if you’re a normal person with the usual and healthy fear of coyotes and forest cryptics. But if you’re Olivia Sinclair, it’s anything but.

“Ah, perfect!” She sighs when they come to a stop. “We can stick it here.”

Cassandra looks around, vigilant. “Are you...sure?”

“Yes, sure as any mediocre man.” She sets down the basket on the ground and picks up the blanket. “Don’t worry, I did bring a source of light for you, a mere mortal.”

“Pfft,” Cassandra comes closer, and takes the opposite pair of edges on the blanket so as to help her spread it out. “What, is this where you tell me you’re a vampire? Make me say it while you breathe down my back?”

“Well, shit, now that the rest of the evening’s plans has lost its mystery…”

“Ugh! Do not even!”

Olivia laughs, and with the blanket all out she gets to work with the array of items she’s brought. Four small mason jars with with small white candles in them that she plants on each blanket corner. She gets out a lighter and goes to work on all of them, Cassandra still standing by, loyal but suspicious, as if one could be both at the same time.

“You brought candles?”

Olivia finishes the last one, setting it back down. “Yeah, I need hot wax. You know, for summoning Satan.”

“Olivia!” Cassandra huffs, before stepping onto the woolen fabric and taking a seat. “You’re lucky I’m not one of my peers from my Bible Study. They would start spraying their travel-sized holy water all over you.”

Olivia laughs again, and pulls out some more items from the basket behind her, before she, too, sits down. “I’m sorry, I can’t help it. Old habits.”

“Summoning Satan?”

“Nah, teasing you.”

First, Cassandra gives a side-eye, but when Olivia meets her gaze with a warm smile and an offer of peanut M&M’s she softens. She takes the box from her and opens it. “You brought sustenance for our off-grid affair.”

“Yes, I did. Admittedly, it is mostly stuff I was going to bring with me to the movies with Ellinor tonight. I’m a candy smuggler.”

Cassandra smirks. “You had plans tonight with Ellinor?”

“Yeah, she wanted to go see Star Tr--Wars! Dammit, I always get those confused,” she admonishes herself while getting into her own package of sour patch kids. “Anyways, she’s gone with Cullen, so I doubt there’s love lost.”

“I’m sure he’s loving every minute. He’s a huge fan,” Cassandra knocks the first few pieces back. She looks beautiful, with the way her face and neck are illuminated sparsely by firelight. It’s mesmerizing, especially when her eyes light up in their subtle glow. “You broke plans just to...to bring me here?”

Olivia pulls her knees up against her chest. She’s sitting close enough to talk low, hushed and sweet, but far enough for deniability as to her desires. She sucks on a sour piece of candy and looks out at the landscape. “This place is important to me. I go whenever I need to clear my head. Mostly at night, since I go on drives. Ellinor’s been here, and so has Theia. But I don’t bring anyone else here. Not...well, not until tonight, I suppose.”

Cassandra sets down her box, still chewing. “Theia. Is she your friend, the one you were with at the gala?”

“Yes,” she smiles, reaching and taking her hair out of its ponytail. “We’ve been thick as thieves for years.”

“So,” Cassandra chuckles to herself, “that explains it.”

Oh? Olivia looks at her, eyes narrowed unevenly with confused intrigue. “What?” She looks on as Cassandra squirms a bit, in her own kind of way: shoulders tensing, but her expression otherwise hard to read. Her palms clasping together in her criss-crossed lap.

“She looked like she wanted to fight me. That, and...ugh, I shouldn’t say it. It’s ridiculous of me.”

Olivia shrugged. “Cassandra, if anything is welcome around me, it’s being ridiculous. You should know better than anyone at this point.”

She grins crookedly. Reluctance, coming from someone who has the premium on being mature and logical. “I...I noticed how comfortable you were with her. When you came down the stairs, with your arm in hers. I had no idea who she was but I...I got jealous.”

Olivia sucked on her teeth, holding back the urge to laugh from the ludicrous nature of it all, and instead reached for a few more sour patch kids. Fucking hell, Theia was right. Theia and her weird, weird hunches about social cues. God dammit, she would never hear the end of it if she told her that it worked.

“I’m sorry that happened. It was...I don’t know, the whole night was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have gone, but, my Mom makes demands of me that are few but huge. I wasn’t lying when I said my family keeps me on a weird leash, it’s...it’s a long story.”

“No, I get it. Mine does too. No need to apologize,” Cassandra shakes her head, watching as Olivia eats some more. “It was just me being unreasonable. I am guilty of that. It’s sort of my thing.”

“I wouldn’t say…” Olivia scrunches her nose, and swallows her bite. “Well, okay.” She turns herself to face her, crossing her legs like Cassandra has, only a bit tighter. “So, like, first impression of you, alright? On the soccer field, when you and Cullen came up to ask about the Strokes concert. You were intense, and you didn’t waste any time on extra words or...you know, laughing. But you weren’t someone I’d picture when it comes to the word ‘unreasonable.’ Not even when I got to know you. Intense...focused...serious, but not unreasonable.”

Cassandra leans back on her hands, her legs stretching out with one crossing over the other. More relaxed. “Would it be a deal-breaker if I were unreasonable?”

Olivia tucks some hair behind her ear. “I don’t know. It doesn’t seem to be one of yours. I wouldn’t think it’d be very fair of me to--”

“Oh, so you think you’re the unreasonable one?”

Olivia blinks, and looks towards the woods ahead of her. “I...uh, well…”

“No, no, Ms. Sinclair. You know your words. Make your case.” She’s smiling softly, in that cocky, half-arrogant sort of way. The way that makes you want to believe every word and every thought she’s thinking before she ever says it.

“Um.” Olivia rubs the back of her neck while her mind does its best to put together a coherent response. Not the easiest thing to be done. “I hate to say it, but...I don’t think it’d be nearly as effective as the case you made.”

At that, Cassandra frowns, and peers down at her lap. “Olivia, I was upset, and--”

“No, the thing is,” she takes a half-breath, “you said it yourself you don’t mistake your words. You were right. I like control...but it’s because I like detachment. I want people to like me but I don’t want to risk them letting me down. Oh, and if we need any other filler information, I’m also the Queen of Death in your local Poli Sci class. I mean, if that’s not unreasonable, then…”

Her mind trails off, getting lost in the insecurities she’s named. Once and for all, they’re no longer elephants in the room -- at least for her. In a bizarre way, here, in the middle of a blanket with only four candle jars to light up her world...her world with her...it felt the safest she had been to be herself outside of her close friendships. Far away from anything and everything that’d make her want to shut herself up. In spite of the solace, it’s also sad, and her gaze wanders down as she fiddles with blanket fabric between her fingers. There’s crickets chirping behind her, but not much else to distract.

“You know, Olivia, the soccer field was not the first time we ever came into contact.”

She looks up a bit. That can’t be right; she had never uttered a word to Cassandra before that day. Sure, she existed, and she had seen her around as another person in the crowd, maybe. But never dialogue, and certainly never introductions.

“What?”

Cassandra smiles, and leans up more. “Poli Sci 234. Social movements.”

“But...but you weren’t in that class. I don’t remember you at all--”’

“It was taught by a Professor I had my first year I grew to like a lot. I wanted to take 234, but it wouldn’t fit. I still stopped in once or twice, sat in the back of the class. I still remember...hah,” she bites back a laugh, “you were wearing this big, black bow in your hair, around your ponytail. I didn’t really know what to make of you. This guy was going on and on about his half-soaked opinions, and everyone in the class was checking out. But then you raised your hand and shut him down so mercilessly it was...like…” Cassandra’s chest heaved again with another amazed laugh. “I thought you were going to make him cry.”

Olivia listens, a bit lost at first, but the memory is too stark for her to forget. Oh, she remembers that man. That horrible, libertarian-sympathizing asshole who thought his voice was that of Jesus himself. She gasps her own laugh of disbelief.

“Payten Thompson. Ugh!” she sounds off in disgust. “We...shit! We were discussing the Gay Rights Movement. I remember. He thinks he knows everything there is to know because he’s gay and on the GSA cabinet, but he can’t name the Black trans woman who threw the first shot glass at Stonewall? Fucking bogus.” She rolls her eyes, already starting to see red just recalling the moment she looked across the desks and classmates at him and obliterated his pacifist, respectability-politic drenched opinions.

Cassandra nods. “Yes. It was...so unexpected. At least I thought so. I went to the Professor’s office after that class to visit and he brought you up. Said you were quiet, but when you had something to say, you didn’t hold back. I assumed our paths would cross in classes eventually, so I didn’t really follow up after. Then months passed, and I started seeing this girl hanging out with her friend on the grass by the field. One with a black bow in her hair.”

That bow was a good look. A very good look. Shit luck she lost it at a party and hadn’t been able to find one to replace it. It was pique aesthetic. Well, that wasn’t the point of this discussion.

Olivia finds herself blushing, and she tries to escape it by watching the city lights. “I...didn’t see you in that class. That’s so funny.”

“I’m not really someone who captures people’s attention. Not like you. But my point is, you’re not the only one who likes distance and control.”

“Yeah,” she replies, dismissive of herself, “what a valuable talent I have, getting attention. I should put it on my CV.”

Out of nowhere, or at least to Olivia, Cassandra sits up and places her fingers along the far side of Olivia’s face. With unexpected care and touch she guides Olivia’s gaze back to her. With shocked obedience she follows along, lips parting and eyes rounding.

Cassandra looks determined, assured of herself. Confident, but compassionate.

“Liv, if it’s one thing that doesn’t look good on you, and one thing only, it is being apologetic of what makes you so amazing.”

Her non-stop blush goes into sudden-fever mode. Thank goodness for the dull lighting. Olivia inhales, but is at a loss for words. Well, until she isn’t: the moment Cassandra tries to withdraw her hand.

“No,” she lets escape, voice cracked. She takes hold of it, and holds it to her lap.

Cassandra’s eyes widen but she goes along. “Liv, are you...what are--”

“Cassandra, I…” oh, crap, she’s done so little thinking about this whole night. For someone who says they love control and indifference, she’s throwing it all to the wind. “Look, can I...can I just be honest about something? About...about tonight?”

Cassandra tilts her head. “What, did you actually not forget the shovel?”

“Ugh, no! It’s...it’s not anything like that. I mean it, I’m…”

“What is it then?”

Well, fuck. Here...goes nothing. She takes a deep breath, something she’s been doing frequently tonight, and closes her eyes for the beginning. The jumping off point. “I don’t want to be happy if it’s without you. I don’t want to be angry if it’s not with you. You...you drive me crazy, and confuse me, but...but you also make me laugh, and you eat the peanut M&M’s I hate but buy anyway because I think maybe this time around I’ll like them, but I never do so I try to pawn them off on Ellinor, and that’s insane of me, but...but you...you make the insane things I do make sense for some reason. I brought you here because I wanted...to say...I wanted to ask you…”

“Ask me...what?”

She re-opens her eyes, and they are starting to sting from the build-up of emotion. The walls are crumbling away into dust and sand, and all she has is one Hail Mary to throw before it’s all botched for good. This would be her only chance, her one chance -- there could be no more believing it could happen some other day, or in some other universe. She was done with the denial. Surrounded by cheap candles and sugar-salt on her tongue, she was going for broke.

“If...if I could...have another shot.”

Cassandra has the best poker face in the world. It’s a good listening face, though. For every second she doesn’t react, Olivia feels herself sinking a foot deeper into the ground. Asking for something she in no way deserves after all the nonsense. But she’s sick of not trying. Which is why, when Cassandra grins to one side, and tucks a leg underneath the other so as to lean further into her, it’s the closest she’ll ever come to believing in a higher power probably in her entire life.

There has to be a rejection on the wings. All the hints, all the signs that Cassandra didn’t want her anymore. Past-tense was past-tense, right? Well, not exactly.

As Cassandra’s eyes half-close, and she leans in slowly with her lips reaching towards hers, it all feels like some bittersweet recreation of a memory. The couch, in the office, when everything went wrong. Butterflies run amok in her, and she freezes. Now Olivia knows how she might have felt. How could she have had the guts to say no to this?

She just has that much integrity.

But she’s not going anywhere this time. This time, she leans in the rest of the remaining couple inches, and they kiss. They kiss. And it’s cautious, like all innocent first kisses are: far and away more docile than what Olivia’s typically gone for. There’s no clamoring, no rigor. Although, in their place is respect and relief. She’ll happily take that exchange as she closes her eyes and submits, not wanting for anything. Her hands go to either side of Cassandra’s face, sliding them against her skin until the ends of her fingers are in her hair. Her short, soft hair. So soft. Their kiss grows, but is steady in its shyness.

Then, she pulls back ever-so-slightly, and her eyes slit open.

“Um, hey...so, this is...awkward, but, I actually...I got somewhere to be…” she whispers, softly grimacing. What better way to cap off a raw moment of vulnerability than a cringey joke?

Cassandra raises a brow, and her hand slides around to the back of Olivia’s neck. “I was right, you aren’t very good at this.” Her lips graze against Olivia’s. “But fine, I dare you to leave.”

Olivia blushes some more, and arches her back against her. “No, I think I’d rather try my luck at tasting the M&M’s again…” she smiles fiendishly, and her eyes flash into Cassandra’s, before she returns her lips to hers. The way Cassandra feels, the way she kisses her, the way her hand feels sliding down her collarbone and onto her shoulder…the warmth of her breath raising, and their rhythm with each other starting to find its way...

She yearns for nothing and nowhere else.

#college au update #modern!olivia #ellinor trevelyan #day & age #WOOOOOOOO #modern thedas #UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE

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plounce · 5 years

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kurapika and leorio

kurapika-

how i feel: kurapika is...... so much. i started watching hxh because of kurapika and then after yorknew (also due to other things i needed to devote my time to) i stopped watching bc he was the draw for me. i love that bitch he is rob bait. he is everyonebait honestly

romantic ships: LEOPIKA 4 LIFE i looooove team parent ships... i love them they tick so many boxes for me. pining estrangement... ach! go see dr bigdick kp please

non romantic ships: him and melody are such sweet friends... i love them... everyone say thank you melody

unpopular opinion: i would accept living in a universe where kp dies if i knew that the neighboring universe got endgame leopika

one thing i wish would/had happened in canon: i hope gon and killua become taller than kurapika, who never gets another growth spurt.

leorio-

how i feel: OH LEORIO... i started out kinda :/ bc i dont like horny comic relief characters but as always hxh subverted that and now its like ;_______; DR BIGHEART...... I LOVE YOU AND HOW MUCH YOU LOVE YOUR LOVED ONES

romantic ships: LEOPIKA FOR LIFE!!!! i think it is so funny that leorio got kp into a high ranking furry posse just through the power of gay pining. dummyyyyyy

non romantic ships: leorio / being a great paternal figure. leorio / a #1 dad mug

unpopular opinion: the main good thing about hunter exam arc leorio is that he gets us to yorknew arc leorio. he grows as he finds people to devote himself to.

one thing i wish would/had happened in canon: i wish the transmisogyny had NOT happened lol. i also hope he'll make more appearances in current canon and that he learns about kp's current modus operandi soon...

#chirps

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lolablackwrites · 6 years

Text

Writer’s Retreat (AU), Part 5 - Chris x MC x Zig

Summary: As MC (Charlotte) starts making more progress on her book, she hangs out at the bar with Chris and has a surprise encounter with a certain park ranger.

Notes: Thank you to everyone who has been so encouraging and supportive of this series so far, you are all wonderful and I appreciate you so much ❤️ If you’re new to this series, you can check out the previous installments here: Part 1 , Part 2, Part 3, Part 4.

Fanfic Master List

When Charlotte unlocked the front door of the cabin, she could hear her phone singing. Her heart started pounding and she forced herself to walk, not run, to pick it up. When she reached it, her heart sank a little. Charlotte hadn’t really expected James to call, but she still found herself feeling slightly disappointed at having her hopeful fantasy shattered. The warm feeling she’d had in her chest from her hike with Chris was fading and once again, Charlotte wondered what the hell she was doing.

“Hey, Zack,” Charlotte said when she answered the phone.

“What’s wrong? You sound like someone just ran over your dog.”

“Nice analogy,” Charlotte said, rolling her eyes. “It’s nothing, I’m fine. What’s up?”

“I’m calling about your pages,” he said. Charlotte held her breath, desperately hoping for good news. “This story you sent me seems . . . familiar . . . to a certain writer I know with her head up her own ass about an ex-boyfriend.”

“Write what you know, right?” Charlotte said weakly, feeling certain everything she’d done would have to be scrapped. I’ve got to get it together.

“Oh, I have no objections,” Zack said. “In fact, everyone here is loving the pages. Naturally, I haven’t filled them in on the inspiration behind it, but they want you to keep rolling with this. I just need you to make sure that none of this is so close to life that James’s mother would have fuel for a defamation suit or something, but that can all be fixed during the editing phase if need be. Really, I just need you to keep going with this.”

“That’s such a relief,” Charlotte said with a heavy sigh, the weight dissipating from her shoulders.

“When can I have more pages?” Zack asked. Charlotte thought of the hike she’d just taken with Chris. If she closed her eyes, she could still feel his lips on hers, could still taste his tongue.

“Soon,” she promised. “You’ll have them soon.”

“I’m almost done with your book,” Chris said as he leaned his elbows on the bar. In the days since their hike, Charlotte had spent a fair amount of time with him, often visiting him while he filled in for his dad at the Hull Hole. However, things hadn’t really romantically progressed past their kiss in the woods. The attraction was still there--she knew he felt it, too--but they were moving slowly. Although this was divergent from Charlotte’s usual modus operandi, she liked that she had the opportunity to get to know him like this. Plus, she didn’t think it was really fair to get too involved with someone else when she had so many loose ends with James. James. God, she really felt like all of her loose ends were fraying. She’d only heard from him once in the last few days, a late night, misspelled text: “hye i miss u” It was so unlike James that she knew he had to have been drunk when he sent it--he never substituted the letter “u” for “you”; he saw it as the death of language. The text had come in at nearly two in the morning while Charlotte was asleep. When she woke up and received the text, she had really wanted to reply, but she’d forced herself not to. Her resolve had lasted for four hours before she finally gave in and texted, “I miss you too, hope you’re doing okay.” James hadn’t replied and that had been nearly two days ago. She hated that she cared so much.

Charlotte forced herself to pull away from thoughts of James and refocus on Chris in front of her.

“Oh, yeah?” she asked. “Hasn’t scared you off yet?”

“Not at all,” Chris said with a grin. “Actually, I really like it. But I have to ask--are the characters based on real people?”

“Yes and no,” Charlotte said. “They’re sort of an amalgam of several people, although not necessarily on purpose.”

“So the main character isn’t you?”

Charlotte hesitated. It was true that most of the characters were inventions or partial representations of people she knew, but there were two that were very true to life: the ones based on her and James. It was part of why James’s mother disliked her so much.

“Yes and no,” she said again. Chris raised an eyebrow at her.

“You’re very cryptic,” he said.

“I can’t reveal all of my secrets,” she said with a smile.

“Are you sure I can’t persuade you?” he asked slyly.

“I suppose that depends on your methods.”

Chris opened his mouth to reply but they were suddenly interrupted by a beautiful blonde woman. The woman glanced sidelong at Charlotte before focusing her attention on Chris.

“I need the keys to your truck,” the woman said.

“What’s wrong with your car?” Chris asked as he dug in his pocket for the keyring.

“It’s making a weird noise.”

“And I’m guessing you haven’t taken it in yet.”

“Nope,” the woman said, taking the keys from him.

“Give me your keys, I’ll take it in tomorrow,” Chris said. She handed over her own keys and leaned across the bar to kiss Chris’s cheek.

“Thanks, love you,” the woman said before she turned and left the bar. Charlotte watched the exchange with a sinking feeling in her stomach. The feelings were all too familiar to how she felt when James canceled plans with her for Vanessa. I can’t do this. Charlotte stood up and pulled out her wallet, reaching for the few slightly crumpled bills she had in there and dropping them on the bar.

“Are you leaving?” Chris asked, surprised.

“Yeah, I think I should,” she said. “Look, Chris . . .”

“Uh-oh,” he said, the smile leaving his face. “Nothing good ever starts with ‘Look, Chris.’”

“I don’t want to get in the middle of something,” she said. He still look confused. “If you’re already with somebody--” she continued, gesturing to where the blonde woman had stood at the bar.

“What?” Chris cut in. “AJ? Oh, god, no, she’s my sister.”

“Your sister?”

“Yeah,” Chris said, looking slightly horrified. “And she’s gay,” he added quickly. “So, you know . . . lots of layers of ‘no’ there.”

“Oh,” she said, feeling relieved and more than a little silly for jumping to conclusions. Chris still look appalled at the idea of him being with his sister, and Charlotte felt like she had to say something to break the awkwardness. “My twin is gay.” What the fuck, Charlotte? she asked herself. Kaitlyn’s sexuality is not an icebreaker.

“You have a twin?” Chris asked interestedly. “You haven’t mentioned her before.”

“Haven’t I?” Charlotte asked, trying to think back over their conversations. It occurred to her then that she and Chris hadn’t actually shared that many personal details about themselves. Conversation flowed easily between them and it seemed like they talked about every topic under the sun--except, it would seem, themselves.

Chris shook his head. “Not that I can remember,” he said. “Do you have any other siblings?”

“No, just Kaitlyn,” she said. “What about you?”

“Well there’s AJ, who you saw, and I have a brother, Kyle.”

“Does Kyle live in town, too?”

Chris smiled at the thought of his brother. “No, actually he doesn’t. He currently lives in Berlin where he’s in a bluegrass band.”

Charlotte considered this for a moment.

“A bluegrass band? In Germany?”

“I know, it sounds weird,” Chris said. “But he’s always been so into music and he’s really talented--he can listen to a song and figure out how to play it in no time. When he was in college, he got a scholarship for a study abroad program in Germany and he just fell in love with it. While he was there, he befriended a couple guys at school and together they formed a bluegrass trio. Kyle ended up dropping out of school, which my parents hated, but I kind of admire him. He figured out what he loved and he went for it. The band is fairly successful over there and he seems really happy.”

“That’s really cool,” Charlotte said, impressed. “Does he visit very often?”

Chris shrugged. “A few times a year.”

“Have you ever been to visit him?”

Chris laughed a little, although Charlotte thought she detected a note of sadness behind his smile.

“No,” he said. “I’ve never even been out of Maine.”

“Really?” Charlotte asked, surprised. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” Chris said. “It just never seems like the right time. Plus I’ve got the flower shop and I’m helping out my folks . . . things come up,” he said with a shrug. “Someone’s gotta man the bar.”

Charlotte wanted to press the issue further, but she got the feeling Chris was done talking about the subject so she let it go.

“I’m much more interested in talking about your book,” he said, the easy smile returning to his face. “Especially since you admitted some of this is based on real life. I have questions about a couple scenes.”

“Oh?”

“I believe there’s one where Ana and Jack have sex on an empty stage--”

“I’m going to go to the bathroom,” Charlotte interrupted, her face flushing. She’d forgotten all about that day when she and James had been alone in the auditorium. Everyone else had gone home and they’d taken advantage and gone center stage.

“What’s with the spotlight?” James asked, shielding his eyes as Charlotte hurried back to the stage.

“A good performance deserves to be well lit,” she said. “And I heard this is the greatest show on Earth.”

James laughed. “That’s the circus.”

Charlotte smiled coyly. “Maybe you could be my ringmaster.”

“Okay, but we’re not done discussing your book,” Chris teased. Charlotte rolled her eyes and shook her head good naturedly as she headed towards the hallway that led to the bathrooms. No sooner had she turned the corner when she smacked right into someone and lost her balance, but strong hands caught her arms and managed to keep her upright.

“Oh, sorry!” Charlotte exclaimed. She looked up at the person she’d run into and found herself face to face with the sexy park ranger.

“No, it’s my fault,” Zig said. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said, very aware of his hands still on her arms. Charlotte couldn’t understand why, but being this close to him was both sobering and intoxicating. Her skin felt electric where his fingertips rested and she was having a hard time focusing her thoughts. “I didn’t step on your foot or something, did I?”

“My feet will live,” Zig said with a grin. He seemed to notice that he was still holding her arms and he let go. Charlotte felt a little disappointed at the loss, but she found she could think a little more clearly when they weren’t touching. “Can I buy you a drink to apologize?”

“No, um, that’s okay,” she said quickly. Charlotte wanted to say yes, but she felt so overwhelmed already that she wasn’t sure she could handle actually having a beer with him, not yet anyway. There was also Chris to consider, although Charlotte had no idea where they actually stood. But she reminded herself that they hadn’t made any sort of promises to each other, and one kiss did not an exclusive relationship make. Then there was James . . . Charlotte pushed him from her mind. She didn’t want to think of James right now, not when Zig was standing so close to her. “I think I’m actually going to head home soon.”

“Oh, okay,” Zig said. Charlotte wasn’t sure if he actually looked a little disappointed or she just wanted him to be disappointed. “Maybe another time.”

“Yes, definitely,” she said. Zig grinned at her.

“Good,” he said. “See you around, Charlotte.”

Zig headed out into the bar and as soon as he was out of the hallway, Charlotte slumped against the wall and exhaled the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Good lord, what was wrong with her? She never behaved this way about any guy, never had this kind of visceral reaction. She’d never even felt like this with James, so completely out of control.

Completely forgetting about her need to pee, Charlotte took a deep, steadying breath and headed back to the bar.

“Hey, I think I’m gonna take off,” she said. Chris immediately looked concerned.

“Was it because of the stage thing? I’m sorry, if that made you uncomfortable--”

“No, no, it’s not that,” Charlotte assured him with a smile. “If I was uncomfortable with that scene, I wouldn’t have written for all four of my readers to see. I’m just tired, it all kind of hit me at once.”

“You do look a little off,” Chris said, furrowing his brow. “Are you okay to drive? I can call AJ and have her fill in while I take you home.”

“Yes, I’m fine,” Charlotte assured him. She hadn’t even finished her first beer and she knew the way she felt had nothing to do with alcohol. “I promise.”

“Okay, well if you start driving and then you change your mind, call me and I’ll come get you.”

“Thanks, that’s very sweet of you,” Charlotte said, feeling touched. “I’ll see you soon?”

“Yes, definitely,” Chris said, echoing the words she’d said to Zig only minutes before.

Charlotte said goodbye and left the bar. The cool evening air cleared her head a little as she walked down the street, but she still felt out of sorts, like she was being pulled in several different directions at once. When she reached her car, Charlotte climbed in and rested her head against the steering wheel as she pulled out her phone.

“Hey, twin!” Kaitlyn’s cheerful voice said over the speaker. “What’s up?”

“Tell me a joke,” Charlotte said.

“Your face.”

Charlotte burst out laughing. “We have the same face.”

“Well, then, the joke’s on me,” Kaitlyn said. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Charlotte said, not entirely sure that was true.

“Want to talk about it?”

Charlotte shook her head before remembering she was on a phone call.

“Not yet.”

“Call me when you do, day or night,” Kaitlyn said.

“I love you, twin.”

“I love you, too, twin.”

Part 6

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thatgirlonstage · 7 years

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Could I request... BNHA (manga), Bakushima, a scenario where they've been clearly into each other for a while but Bakugou is Oblivious™ and Kirishima tries to get him to see it but in vain and so eventually Kirishima has to just... whack Bakugou over the head with it (figuratively or literally) ?

… *slides you a copy of the manga*

jk of course I’ll write that but like. Is that not also basically their canon dynamic lol.

Forgive my characterization, it’s the first time I’ve really tried to write these two. Also this got… long. Like I love it, but it’s Long. :/

Warning: SERIOUS MANGA SPOILERS. DO NOT READ IF YOU’RE NOT CAUGHT UP ON THE MANGA.

Kirishima might have the hardest head in all of UA – rivaled only, perhaps, by Tetsutetsu – but he didn’t think he’d ever met anyone as dense as Bakugou Katsuki.

It had really started, he supposed, that first night in the dorms. After the whole “King of the Rooms” business had wound down, and after their conversation with Tsu, Kirishima had come downstairs in the quiet, unable to sleep. Bakugou was sprawled across the sofa, staring at the ceiling.

“I thought you went to bed,” Kirishima mentioned casually.

“You were all being so fucking noisy I couldn’t sleep,” Bakugou shot back, but there was no venom in it. Kirishima leaned on his elbows on the back of the sofa, next to Bakugou.

“Satou won the room contest, but only because he gave everyone cake,” he said.

“Like I care about your stupid room contest.”

“Yeah, the room contest thing was kinda stupid, but Satou’s cake was really good.” He licked his lips at the memory.

“What kind?” Bakugou asked shortly. Kirishima glanced sideways at him. His eyes were still firmly fixed on the ceiling, and he was still sneering, but he sat waiting for the answer.

“Chiffon. Super sugary. Well, that makes sense for him I guess. It would make my teeth ache eventually, and I guess it’s not an especially manly thing to eat,” he laughed. “But I’ll save a piece for you next time.” Bakugou didn’t respond for so long that Kirishima started to stand up and leave. When he finally did speak, it was so sudden that Kirishima almost fell over.

“My dad likes baking.” Steadying himself with a hand pressed into the sofa, Kirishima turned fully toward Bakugou, unable to stop himself raising an eyebrow.

“And you like setting his bread and cakes on fire?” he asked. Bakugou’s face knitted into a snarl, finally turning to look at him.

“I don’t just set everything on fire!” he shouted. Kirishima stood, crossing his arms, meeting Bakugou’s glare with skepticism, until, abruptly and unexpectedly, it melted away, and Bakugou flopped his head back against the sofa, returning his gaze to the ceiling. “He really does make good cakes, when he gets a chance to.” Kirishima hovered for a long moment, uncertain whether he ought to leave or not. Bakugou stayed silent. The only noise was the gentle breeze from the air vent. Kirishima began to walk back towards the door.

“I’ll make sure he bakes one if you ever visit,” Bakugou said. Kirishima stopped dead, a jolt of electricity racing up his spine. Slowly, he returned to his previous position, leaning over the back of the sofa.

“I have an uncle who’s a fisherman,” he said into the quiet. “Whenever I spend the weekend at his place he has the best fish I’ve ever tasted, they’re so fresh.”

Kirishima didn’t quite recall how it happened, only that they stayed down there, talking about nothing in particular until the sun came up. He remembered he never came around the sofa to just sit down, but at some point leaned so far he slid over the top of it, his head hanging down off the cushions, his legs still hooked over the top. He stayed there until the extra blood flow to his head started making him feel dizzy and he flipped upright, sitting next to Bakugou, both their arms flung out to the side yet carefully never touching. Neither of them said a word about it the next day, or let out a peep of complaint about being tired.

Bakugou was never easy to talk to, but after that he seemed like he finally wanted to talk to Kirishima. He would be rude and abrupt, but he wouldn’t shut him away from conversations – at least, not usually. There was the night he and Midoriya came from whatever fight they’d had, both of them black and blue with bruises, Bakugou’s eyes red as if from tears. He’d shoved Kirishima bodily away when he tried to ask what happened, tiny firebursts in his palm warning of the potential for a real explosion. Kirishima stepped back and didn’t ask again, not even as the weeks went by and Bakugou still refused to say a word about what had happened.

But most of the time, there was an element of his brutal honesty that Kirishima appreciated and respected. There was intelligence and calculation behind it. He wasn’t afraid of Bakugou, which he supposed helped – Bakugou’s explosions couldn’t hurt him unless he really decided he wanted to attack, and Kirishima trusted he wouldn’t do that.

There were days and nights when Bakugou would vent his rage to Kirishima, or occasionally on Kirishima’s room – he cringed at some of the burn marks left on his desk – but more often than not those nights ended calmly. He’d been almost frightened the first time the rage had just vanished out of Bakugou and he’d dropped like a rag doll into the chair next to him, muttering “Stupid fucking Deku,” as an end to a twenty-minute rant about Midoriya. He’d been quiet for almost five whole minutes before Bakugou snapped, “Are you going to say something or should I just leave?” They’d talked for three hours before Bakugou finally left for bed.

Kirishima had been waiting for a while for Bakugou to say something. He didn’t particularly want to make the first move himself, since Bakugou usually reacted to any display of serious emotion with SHUT UP YOU FUCKER I DON’T NEED TO WASTE MY TIME HEARING ABOUT THIS SHIT. But really, it was getting a bit ridiculous. He would have settled for actions over words, since that was more Bakugou’s modus operandi anyway, but Bakugou never initiated anything physical, even if he never jerked away when Kirishima’s arm or leg “accidentally” came to rest against his own. It wasn’t until Aoyama made some jibe about Uraraka and Midoriya’s occasional awkward flirting and Bakugou responded with a completely vacant look that it even occurred to Kirishima that Bakugou might not know how he felt.

Watching his conversations a bit more closely now, Kirishima realized with a sinking feeling that he was right. Bakugou had no idea how Kirishima felt about him. He tried getting more blatant, at first. He was no flirter, and Bakugou wouldn’t have responded well in any case, but he tried to slide suggestion and innuendo into the conversation from time to time. With his quirk, some jokes were almost too easy, and, he would have thought, painfully obvious. Yet, they provoked no reaction. He tried inching closer to him, so those occasional thigh touches became a constant of their talks. No reaction. He blatantly grabbed Bakugou’s knee and squeezed it when he was upset. That earned him the briefest quizzical look and absolutely nothing more.

He had a forty-eight hour crisis where he wondered if he was going insane and had misread every single signal Bakugou had given him. Maybe Bakugou wasn’t even gay, and Kirishima was about to walk into the biggest mistake of his life. He went to Mina in panic. She watched him, staring curiously, as he paced back and forth, tearing at his spiky hair. When he was done pouring out his insecurities, she held up a finger, and returned a moment later with Tsu.

“We don’t really know what to think about Bakugou being in a relationship,” Mina giggled. “But Tsu and I agree, if he has feelings for anyone, it’s definitely you.”

“What if he doesn’t have feelings for me at all, though?” Kirishima asked. His hair hung down and loose about his face as he tugged at it nervously. “What if he’s just my friend? I’m going to fuck that up completely if I say something.”

“You have to say what you’re thinking, Kirishima,” Tsu said, her wide eyes fixed on him. “It’s Bakugou. He’s probably too scared to admit he feels anything unless you say something first.”

“Bakugou. Scared.” Kirishima said flatly. Mina burst into giggles. Tsu ribbited.

“When it comes to feelings?” Mina asked. “Bakugou is terrified of those. Scared to admit he has a ‘weakness’? Abso-lutely.” She leaned back on her hand, grinning and winking at Kirishima, waving him out of her room. “Go on, lover boy, let us know how it goes.” He’d left somewhat comforted, but nowhere near ready to actually talk to Bakugou.

Bakugou came by less once Kirishima was off at his internship, busy with his remedial classes and still nursing the humiliation of having failed the provisional license exam, while Kirishima would drop into bed exhausted each night after the double work of his internship and continuing classes. Still, the night after he faced down the man with the quirk power-up drug Bakugou turned up at his door, looking furious and complaining about the stupid people in the remedial classes – “IcyHot is such a fucking goody two-shoes, he’s insufferable” – for an hour, but eventually his yawns overpowered him and he sat on the edge of the bed, quieting down. “Congratulations on your hero debut,” he muttered. Kirishima had beamed like the sun. He sat on the bed next to him, pressing their knees together.

“Fat had to bail me out,” he said in embarrassed honesty. “I almost let him trick me and get away. I’m too trusting.”

“You would’ve gotten him,” Bakugou said. Another yawn stretched his jaw. He flopped back on the bed, eyes drifting halfway closed. “You’ll make a good hero, Red.” He yawned again. “But don’t get too comfy… Soon as I get my provisional license… I’ll outdo you all…” His eyes were closed.

“As long as you’ll still let me fight beside you,” Kirishima said. He dropped back onto the bed beside Bakugou, who grunted an acknowledgment. Kirishima let his own eyes drift closed as they stayed quiet for a moment. “Hey, Bakugou…?” he started. There was no response. Bakugou was asleep, legs still hanging off of Kirishima’s bed. Kirishima, as gently as he could, pulled Bakugou’s legs up onto the bed. Bakugou stirred but didn’t wake up, turning over and muttering in his sleep. Taking a deep breath, Kirishima crawled onto the bed beside him, trying not to spoon him. He turned onto his side so they were facing opposite directions.

“Just sharing a bed,” he whispered to himself as he reached over to turn off the light. “Nothing weird about it. Just two guys, sharing a bed, deadbeat tired…” When he woke up in the morning, Bakugou was gone. He didn’t see him for almost two days with the way the internship schedule shook out, and when he did, they both acted as if nothing had changed.

He was sleeping lightly these nights, the weight of everything he’d learned from Fat and from Midoriya and Nighteye on his mind. Bakugou came in later than usual, pausing uncertainly on the threshold at the sight of Kirishima reaching out of his bed to switch the light on.

“You were asleep,” he said flatly. Kirishima shook his head.

“Only sort of. What’s up?”

“I’ll let you sleep.” Bakugou turned to go and Kirishima sat up.

“No – hey. You can stay. I’m up now, anyway.” Bakugou hesitated, and then came back into the room, dropping into a chair and propping his feet on Kirishima’s desk. The door swung shut behind him. Kirishima pulled the blanket around his shoulders, shivering in the night air.

“No yelling tonight?” he asked, a wry smile on his face. Bakugou glared at him.

“You really won’t tell me what’s up with the internships?” Kirishima rolled his eyes.

“I told you, I can’t.”

“Why is Deku involved?” he asked bluntly. Kirishima stared.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve seen you and two of the girls all muttering and whispering together with Aizawa-sensei. I’m not an idiot.”

“I really can’t tell you, Bakugou,” Kirishima said. He pulled his legs up onto the bed and crossed him underneath him. “You’ll get your provisional license soon, I know you’ll do fine on their individual test. So you’ll have an internship of your own soon enough.” Bakugou scowled.

“Yeah, but this isn’t just about the internship,” he said. “Something’s up with the four of you.” Kirishima shrugged.

“Okay, you caught me. I still can’t talk about it.”

“Fine. Whatever.” Bakugou said. He fiddled with a pencil on Kirishima’s desk for a moment. “I should just go to bed. Sorry I woke you up.”

“Bakugou, did you come to my room in the middle of the night just to ask me a question you already knew the answer to?”

“I tried to leave when I saw you were asleep,” he growled.

“That’s not an answer.”

“Yeah, I guess I did,” he shot back. “Goodnight.”

“Bakugou, wait.” Bakugou was standing, already making his way toward the door. Kirishima pushed off the bed, dropping the blanket from his shoulders and stepping towards him, the sudden chill of the air raising goosebumps on his skin. “Bakugou. Bakugou, stop.”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” Bakugou shouted, tiny flames bursting in his palms. “Just let me go to bed. It’s late.”

“And you came to talk, so talk.”

“You won’t say anything.”

“But you knew that coming in, and you came in anyway.”

“Because I was hoping you would say something!” Bakugou shouted. He swung around, an explosion bursting from his palm with enough force that it left ash on the floor. He was glaring so furiously at Kirishima that he took a step back. “Something’s going on and you won’t tell me what and it’s us, it’s UA, so that means it’s dangerous, and it’s Deku, so that means it’s stupid. So you’re out there doing something stupid and dangerous, but you won’t tell me what, so what’s the point of me staying?” His hands curled into fists. “Huh?” Kirishima stared at him.

“You don’t have to be worried about me,” he said slowly. “The internships are all with pros. We’re safe with them.” Bakugou’s face darkened.

“Were you safe when you chased that guy into an alley? You were alone, then. You got hurt. You said yourself Fat showed up in the nick of time.” Kirishima stared.

“I got nicked because I didn’t realize he could cut through my hardening, I was hardly hurt—” he started.

“We do dangerous shit. Doesn’t matter who we’re with. Even All Might—” Bakugou sucked in a breath and stopped. “The pros aren’t infallible,” he said.

“I know that, but—”

“Just shut up.” Bakugou’s face was dark, the shadows from Kirishima’s bedside lamp throwing sharp angles across it. “Go to bed, Kirishima,” he said. He turned to go. Kirishima’s arm shot out and caught his shoulder.

“We all do dangerous shit,” he said. “That’s why we’re here. We do dangerous shit so other people can be safe.”

“I said shut up,” Bakugou said, refusing to turn. “I shouldn’t have said anything.” Kirishima hardened his hand, trying to get enough strength to yank Bakugou around to face him.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” he said. “I’m glad that you care. But you can tell me you care about my safety without getting angry at me about it.”

“I don’t care about your safety, I know you’re fine,” Bakugou said, trying to push Kirishima’s arm off his shoulder. “It’s just stupid that I can’t even know what kind of danger you’re getting yourself into. Let go of me!” He pulled away violently, shoving Kirishima backwards until he stumbled into his bed. “Just forget it, okay? Forget it.” He yanked the door open.

“Bakugou!” Kirishima shouted after him. “Bakugou, stop! Katsuki!” He paused, startled, and suddenly staggered backward as Kirishima launched himself forward and slapped him. “Katsuki, you absolute fucking idiot, will you get back in here?” Glaring at him suspiciously, Bakugou slowly walked back into the room, pulling the door shut behind him. Kirishima crossed his arms. “We need to get a couple things straight, because I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you’re apparently allergic to the idea of expressing emotions other than anger. And that is going to have to change, at least with me.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You came here tonight because you’re worried about me and what’s going on with the internships. Because, if I’m not completely mistaken, you care about me.” Kirishima glared at him, daring him to deny it. Bakugou stuffed his hands into his pockets, refusing to reply. “And I care about you. Holy fuck, Bakugou, I care about you more than I care about almost anyone I’ve ever met. You’re smart and you’re manly and you’re an amazing hero, when you’re not cussing out everyone within earshot. And it’s incredible. You’re incredible. And I love sitting here and talking to you and actually getting to know you. But you’re going to have to get a bit better at accepting that you, like the rest of us humans, actually are a person and you have feelings.” Bakugou still remained silent, staring intently at a spot on the wall just over Kirishima’s shoulder. “Am I completely off the mark in thinking some of those feelings are about me?”

“Yes, fine, you’re my friend and I know you can handle yourself but I don’t want to see you get hurt, especially when I don’t even know what you’re doing or where or why and I can’t save you like you saved me.” Bakugou threw up his hands. “Are you happy now, Eijiro? Is that what you wanted me to say? Are we done? Can I go to bed now?”

“Am I just your friend?” Kirishima asked, ignoring the jolt he’d felt when Bakugou had said Eijiro. If he was being honest, he wouldn’t have put money on Bakugou actually knowing his given name. Bakugou glared at him.

“What does that mean?” he demanded.

“Have I really not been obvious enough?” Kirishima groaned. He took a step forward, grabbed Bakugou’s face between his hands, and kissed him as hard as he could. When he released him, Bakugou stumbled back, his face white. He stared soundlessly at Kirishima for a long moment. Kirishima felt panic crawl up his spine. “Was that… Did I just…”

Before he could coherently form a thought, Bakugou had closed the distance between them and then some, shoving Kirishima back up against the bed, pressing their lips together ferociously, his hands tight on the back of Kirishima’s head. Kirishima melted into the kiss with relief. His hands came up to grip Bakugou’s waist, closing any gap between them as he returned the pressure on his lips with fervor until both of them had to break, gasping for air. Bakugou pressed his forehead against Kirishima’s.

“Did that answer your question?” he asked. His breathing was heavy and hot.

“I think so,” Kirishima answered faintly. “I wouldn’t be opposed to you elaborating on your answer, though.” Bakugou reached down and scooped Kirishima’s legs out from under him, practically flinging him onto the bed, and crawled up himself, his knees planted on either side of Kirishima’s hips as he leaned down to press another kiss to his lips. He moved, nipping at the corner of Kirishima’s mouth before pressing his lips against the back of his jaw, down his neck, to his collarbone. Kirishima grabbed the back of his head and pulled him back to his mouth, slipping his tongue out and running it along Bakugou’s lips. He bit at the lip playfully and Bakugou jerked in surprise.

“Watch those sharp teeth of yours,” he growled. Then he abruptly flopped down on top of Kirishima, his face sideways on the pillow next to him. The two boys shifted until they were both lying on their sides facing each other.

“So…” Kirishima said.

“So.”

“Are you going to be able to actually talk to me now? At least sometimes?” Bakugou scowled.

“I’ve always talked to you,” he said.

“You know what I mean.”

“At least sometimes,” he grumbled. “But we’re clear where I stand on…” He reached up a hand in between their bodies to gesture between them. “This?”

“I think so. And we’re clear that I feel the same way?”

“Crystal,” Bakugou replied. He kissed Kirishima again, his tongue lazily sliding across the roof of his mouth. They lay quiet for a few moments. Somehow, their hands found one another and fingers interlocked. Thumbs rubbed circles and their fingers twisted and stroked quietly. Both their eyes were drifting closed when Kirishima’s phone buzzed loudly. He jumped, reaching over to grab it. His eyes widened at the screen.

Meet in three hours. Eri Mission is today.

He jumped to his feet, leaving Bakugou staring at him curiously. He stammered as he spoke. “I… I have to go. I— I’m so sorry, this is the worst time it could have… I’ll be back tomorrow night, I promise. We’ll… I’ll…”

“It’s fine,” Bakugou said, propping himself up on an elbow. “Just go. Kick some villain’s ass for me.” Kirishima nodded, and then bent down impulsively to press a last kiss to Bakugou’s lips.

“I’ll see you soon, Explosion King,” he said.

Yes, this DOES take place right before the mission where Kirishima literally shatters from a beating, because it’s me and I’m an angst queen. (Also, more practically, because I was trying to fit it into the canon timeline and that was the best spot for it lol) But hey, he’ll have someone very aggressively caring for him when he gets back home. Please picture Bakugou literally camped outside of Kirishima’s door wrapping him in more blankets whenever he tries to move and sending explosions after anyone else who gets close. Hope you enjoyed it angst and all :P

Send me prompts!

#bnha #bakushima #katsuki bakugou #eijirou kirishima #bnha manga #manga spoilers #answers #my writing #thanks for requesting bakushima!#I know people love my voltron stuff but it's nice to mix it up #and these two were a lot of fun to write #even if I don't feel like I totally have a handle on their characterization yet #fluffyblue-artnwriting

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ecotone99 · 4 years

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[RF] Early Afternoon

Part 1

It was not what he expected, during the rainy day of December. He has just boarded the train and luckily found a seat, when the girl sitting beside him suddenly held his hand.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said surprised, then quickly pulled out from her clasp. She must have mistaken me for someone else.

"Didn't you like it," she asked, sneering. "Why, are you gay?" she teased.

"Actually," he started. He didn't look like someone stereotypically gay, but he never denied it when asked. "I am."

"Oh, I'm sorry," she replied.

"Well, you should be -- but not for the fact that I'm gay, but for the action of intentionally grabbing my hand, without permission" he said -- politely, that she felt a blush on her cheeks. If said in another tone, she would have been annoyed, and she wouldn't have talked to him any further.

"Where do you get off? If you don't mind me asking?" she asked grabbing his hand again, but unintentionally this time.

"What, you mean like kind of porn?" he asked, still a bit exhilarated from the earlier revelation, even if just to a stranger. Though he didn't deny it, he didn't normally say it out loud either. He didn't even realize that his hands were clasped with hers.

"No dummy, I mean what station! And ew, why would I ask about porn??? You guys are so green-minded all the time."

"Oh sorry," he felt his cheeks turn red in embarrassment. "I was gonna get off at Shaw. My place is just near by there," to which again, he surprised himself. That was the second personal piece of information he shared with a total stranger in less than five minutes. He casually checked his pocket for his cellphone and his wallet -- you never know what kind of modus operandi gangs have these days. Relief. The two were still there, neatly tucked to the pocket of his jeans.

He felt his phone vibrate.

"Oh good. I was gonna get there off too. Are you doing anything today? Why don't you join me for lunch. I'll even treat you," she offered. They have just passed Cubao. "You know -- for the harrassment," she added jokingly. "But it cannot be more than a hundred fifty bucks, else you're gonna rip me off."

She stared at the girl for a second, thinking if she was serious. What was happening? Why was this conversation even taking place? She asking if he was available provided hm a way out however. He could have ended the whole ordeal by just saying he's got errands to run.

But just before he was gonna reply, he heard his tummy rumble -- which he hoped wasn't loud enough.

"If you're contemplating of saying no, reconsider for your tummy," she said, sneering again.

Part 2

They were at a local bar, at lunchtime. She ordered grilled chicken, sisig, chop suey, rice, and -- unbelievably, beer -- for two.

"Itadakimas!!!" she said, with an accent that'd have been unintelligible to any Japanese.

A bit hesitant, but he took a bite of chicken and rice, and several gulps of beer. To any outsider, they'd have looked like a couple having a Saturday lunch date.

"Are you sure you didn't want me to order the beer?" she teased.

"I just thought it can help me understand," he replied. Why was she doing this? A hundred fifty bucks? With all that she ordered, three hundred bucks wouldn't even be enough. Was she planning on making a run after eating, then make me pay??? The questions were endless.

"Understand what? Why a beautiful girl'd suddenly ask you to a date?" she smiled.

"Well, you gotta admit. This --" he pointed to the two of them, "isn't normal. I even admitted to you I was gay. You and I won't work out."

She took gulps of her beer, finishing it 'til the bottle got emptied. "To be honest," she said. Her tone changed. "I just didn't want to be alone. You just seemed like a nice person."

They kept on eating, and drinking beer.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said.

He wasn't the type who usually prods for touchy topics. But somehow he felt that she was waiting for him to ask, "Why, what happened?"

"Actually, I'm on the run from authorities. My boss found out I was sneaking in fecal matter to the chocolate drink we're selling, and now the company I used to work in wants me captured and jailed. I didn't want to be alone 'coz I needed an alibi," she said jokingly.

She ordered more beer.

"Well... I probably should get going then if that's the case," he said, jokingly as well, not budging from his seat.

"Going back to being honest... I just... I got fired today," she said while fiddling with the sisig. "This meal, will be paid by the last five hundred bucks in my pocket."

He waited a while before reacting, or responding. If she was no longer joking, he'd definitely feel more than just a little bit guilty. But she was also the one who offered the treat, however.

"I... wasn't looking for love when I held your hand in the train. Although I did think you were cute. I just really wanted a friend," she continued.

"Don't you have... don't you have friends to call?" he asked, delicately. For a second, he thought of grabbing her hand exposed on the table, but rejected the thought as it may mix his signals.

"I used to," she said, almost teary-eyed. "But not anymore."

Part 3

When he woke up this morning, he didn't think of walking a girl home as one of the things he'd be eventually doing. Walking a guy home probably, up to his bed -- but even that was all just a part of his imagination.

Here he was however, holding an umbrella over the head of a girl who, two hours ago was a complete stranger. He would have offered to drop her off via taxi or car, but he didn't have the resources for either. So he just resorted to the time old transportation method of walking.

"Thank you for doing this. You didn't really have to," she said, her eyes fixed on the road beyond.

"I insist," he said. After all, according to her, her house was just "ten minutes away". And the rain had subsided anyway.

He ended up paying for half the lunch, because he couldn't let her treat him after what he heard. He would have paid for the full lunch, had he had enough money. But he had quite a number of expenses. And he wasn't gonna take the burden of some stranger's problem, yet again. His friends always tell him he is too generous.

"My best friend," she said, one step after the other, "told our boss she should be the one kept by the company. I understand why she did it -- she has two kids. I do not have any dependents. But still, it hurts -- even more than me losing my job. She could have told me and I'd have yielded."

He continued walking as well, one step after the other.

"You should have let me treat you by the way. I was gonna be okay. I only had five hundred bucks in my pocket, but I do have my savings. I'll be fine."

"I think, you're too brave," he said, lightly. "Losing your job and your best friend, and still offering food to strangers."

"I think so too," she said.

They were about to pass a run-down boutique shop. The glass wall was stained with webs and thick dirt, while the insides show a mess of old furniture and abandoned clothes -- clothes that would have been elegant, had they been maintained.

"A year ago or two, there used to be a boutique shop... right over here. Then out of nowhere fire ensued -- everyone was panicking, didn't know what to do. The owner, Mr. Dela Cruz, tried to salvage as much of the dresses as he could, but to no avail. Good thing someone called the firemen and the fire was eventually put out," she said. "The boutique was never really restored back. A fast food chain eventually won the bid for the lot, and now here it is."

He was confused. Fast food? There was no fast food place in sight.

"Some people say however, that people with third eye still see a rundown boutique over here," she continued, tone deaf.

"I do hope you are kidding me right now," he said, evidently spooked -- to which she giggled.

They kept on walking. It was a peaceful early afternoon.

"I used to tell that to friends whenever we pass by that old boutique shop," she said.

"Well, it was a pretty convincing story."

His mind wandered -- thought of Saturday, and his home, and his badminton game with his friends later that day. He remembered his cellphone's vibrate back in the train -- probably his bros reminding him of the game. He thought about what he would've done if he hadn't met this girl. Probably just a normal Saturday. He would've been already watching Netflix while waiting for the game.

He didn't regret it, however.

When they got to the stop right beside a local grocery store, she stopped walking and said, "I'm here. Thank you again for the company."

"I'll be going ahead. I hope you're feeling better," he said with a smile.

"I am," she responded, also with a smile. Then teased, "won't you get my number?"

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#Blogger #Story

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sleepymarmot · 6 years

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Twilight Mirage liveblog 3/5 (episodes 28-54)

28-35

I'm very excited for a series of solo episodes!

Don't know how I feel about the new Grand Magnificent tbh… This concept feels more conventional than the original one, and I'm worried the aspects of his character I found interesting won't be in focus anymore.

I had my problems with the previous system and how it flattened down emotions into inaccurate categories, but so far I'm not excited about the switch… Blades in the Dark's mechanics were kinda hard for me to follow by ear, and being unable to keep track of the gameplay by myself is unpleasant; and the new classes sound really dull compared to the ones in The Veil.

Iota's speech is strange… It sounds more like a simple copy-paste of real-life colonialism than the invasion described previously in the story. “They will ask you to give them a name like ours, they will ask to touch your bone” etc sounds nothing like Independence and its followers' modus operandi was, and, judging by the future tense, hasn't actually happened with the present time settlers yet – so where did that come from, in-universe? In fact, shouldn't her people have a relatively positive outlook on non-hostile outsiders, since they brought on the planet's golden age? Hopefully the following episodes will elaborate on this, because I've made peace with needing lore or plot points explained to me several times, but I need more clarity on big ideological question like this.

Gig is such a Chaotic Good!!

Buying sex is legal, normal & common in the utopia and Signet is a regular customer?! Fucking seriously?! I couldn't even focus on the episode for the next half hour and eventually turned it off because my thoughts kept returning to this and I kept seething with anger. Way to ruin the episode after I was so moved and intrigued by the intro…

They've been pretty careful with past spoilers this season, here's I think the first example: talking at length about the Hitchcocks, plural. Sure, it was only an episode three spoiler, but it was such a good reveal!

So, who actually printed out the ancient Quire people? Was it a political move from one of the sides?

No Austin you definitely have not mentioned Earth building a giant Dyson spehere around themselves!!! What the fuck :D

Everyone got a nice inconsequential vignette and Fourteen's scene had actual high stakes…

I really, really don't get what Seneschal looks like

After half a season of two separate parties and seven solo episodes it's so nice to hear everyone together!

Signet's look is absolutely not the kind of thing I imagined her wearing…

Please tell me someone has made an animatic about Even's hair tendril high-fiving Gig's eye

36-45

It's always cute when the first words after the intro are in that specific tone of voice that makes it obvious that at least 5-10 minutes before were spent in a lively conversation about some nonsense that finally was put to an end no more than two seconds ago (and then they talk about nonsense for ten more minutes lol)

I love this show's dedication to describing everyone's outfits in extreme detail at every opportunity

50k+ years later it's Art and Jack's turn to be the half of the party who walks right through the door and charm their way in lol. I hope they don't get shot or buy a bunch of torch units or something

I really like “finding a way to help a teenage community fit in the world” and “reconnecting a family and acquiring infrastructure for travel between planets” as the first projects; it really does convince you that these people have set out to make the world a better place (even if a lot of the time is actually spent pulling heists or fighting mechanical tigers).

Okay, the scavenger faction leader is literally a vulture, I get it.

What I don't get is why we are supposed to dislike that faction. There was some general “eh, they suck” said OOC during setup but we haven't actually seen them do anything bad! Show, don't tell! They need to, like, raid Big Garage and try to steal Gumption's arm if you want me to see them as an enemy.

Remember that nonsense I wrote about T. Rex in my C/w notes post? I can't believe they're doing basically the same joke on the actual show!

But how about… not capture or kill… but befriend the Axiom and/or release it into the wild… I know, I know, they can't travel far enough to move it to a safe distance from humans. But it just offends me on principle that after all that talk of diversity etc, when the characters actually meet a truly alien, unique species, they only consider the options of killing or capturing and exploiting them, and nobody even tries to ask “hey, shouldn't these creatures have rights, even if we are forced to disregard them in self-defence for the moment?” You know who I need to appear on screen ASAP? Bounty. Ask it everything! Does it remember being an Axiom? What did it feel like? What does it think about its transformation and new role?

I thought Grand's special gun was just Even's gun?

Did Janine just call Belgard Signet's “robot wife”? Hell yeah

Me for an hour straight, not having read the description: Blease Do Not Kill My Alien Child I guess that's at least postponed now though… The situation did immediately get mildly creepy again, which makes me concerned. Is this just a different reason to kill a different Axiom – to Free Innocents from a Lotus Eater Machine? I'm getting serious September flashbacks. Honestly, between this, the other team's arc which felt like a crossover about the Chime in Marielda, and everyone getting a personal mech, this half of the season is starting to feel like Counter/weight 2, which is sad because at the beginning the atmosphere was much more original. Also I miss Primary and Satellite's correspondence, it was such a good framing device and a touching relationship at the same time!

Polyphony's powers and way of thinking are more similar to Quire than anything else

I feel very relieved and vindicated by the direction this story took!

Hell yeah finally more about the Waking Cadent!! I've been waiting for that for how many episodes now? Now that we've seen her in person I hate her actually Amend that, I hate both Cadents. A plague on both their houses!

46-54

Good on you Even, what's even the point of a military background if you don't pull rank on some jerks

Am I glad to hear from the Rapid Evening again! Bold of Austin to assume we could forget who Primary and Satellite were Okay, I first had this question a ton of episodes ago, but now it is relevant again: does Grey know the contents of the previous Satellite's final message? She knows about its existence because the numbers match up (yeah I went back and checked), but does she know that Crystal Palace either made a colossal miscalculation about Independence's route or lied on purpose for some reason?

Wait, characters still have beliefs? I don't remember this coming up since the game change

I completely forgot about Tender's cyborg legs and also misheard “I have a fake leg” as “thick leg” and was like “Uh good for you but how's that gonna help?!”

Once again, Team Exploration goes ahead and leaves Team Heist without resources lol. What do you mean they're using our ship for an orbital drop? What do you mean they've taken all axiom scanners? :D Seriously though, it's a shame that the sessions were played in this order because in-universe I see no reason why they wouldn't say “Hey before you go after Acre Seven, let's fly over Terncage and do a scan real quick” (the range on the scanners is far enough for that, right?)

I don't get how Ache works. For Quire, it made what it wishes it could be, but for everyone else it just made evil clones vaguely themed after their regrets?

TENDER IS A GAY DISASTER I haven't heard such a spectacular meltdown since Calhoun probably, holy shit

TENDER IS A DISASTER SQUARED she starts talking to a woman and just doesn't stop! This is a great episode

I like how Gig immediately says no to the devil's bargain

Oh Signet disregarding the digital Blooming, you clearly haven't seen/read (the future version of) Solaris :D

Oh no, it's the Smiling God! Came to visit another podcast that used to have a personification of capitalism as a big boss evil god

A crit at the last possible moment, after a long string of 1s… Ali's dice see through the fourth wall!

I… didn't fully understand the reveal of how it was all connected

Okay, so the Dark Day could have been prevented by keeping the gun dealer priest alive and allowing him to arm the NEH so that it could take over Twilight Mirage and wouldn't need to activate plan B i.e. come here and block signal from the Crystal Palace? Correct? It makes sense now, but Our Profit seems to be from such a far future that I just can't imagine how this plan was created and put in place

O….k… I actually expected Grand to leave the team and go off on his own (or become an NPC) as a consequence of the holiday special if he was the sacrificed character instead of the Chthonic. But now that's kind of strange to hear after all that talk of redemption and second chances?

You get a status! And you get a status! Everyone gets a status!

Wow having a near death experience out of the blue is so relaxing for Fourteen! :D NEVER MIND HOLY CRAP I'm glad that at least Fourteen kept their signature move from The Veil. I was wondering what it would be like, and honestly expected it to be just thrown out

Excuse me, “Omega in Mass Effect 2” and “cool place run by trustworthy people” are literally opposite concepts, have we even played the same game

Grand: Who likes Fourteen Fifteen? Tender, not even letting him finish: ME!!!

Welp, my first guess about the Waking Cadent's identity was correct

Holy crap! I never realized Independence was in that one flashback episode of Counter/weight

#friends at the table #blah blah blah

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pregantheimlich · 7 years

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Feedback to Fandom Followings Thoughts on Turf Wars

Article here: https://www.thefandomentals.com/legend-korra-turf-wars-grounding/

@lokgifsandmusings

Check out Fandom Following, their Game of Thrones reviews are life. On this article, I happened to disagree, so here is my play by play.

I’ll start by outlining my thoughts on Turf Wars: meh. The scope of the story seems like it has shrunken, and I cant imagine that any really significant character development or changes to the cannon will be introduced. The gay stuff is kind ill fitting, sure, but I am quite tickled and gratified to watch characters I’ve known for years interact with this material, and I finally feel like gayness exists in the Avatar verse. I mean, hearing that Aang canonically had an opinion on gayness.. Aang who I grew up with, whom I was almost of an age with once, has canonically acknowledged that gay people exist and is cool about it. Its’ weird- in a good way, though honestly I feel like i’m reading fanfic.. Overall I’m underwhelmed with turf wars, just because I don’t think the story will be that ambitious or significant, honestly. Kyas gay history 101 was face palming fanficcy, anachronistic and misshapen... Now onto the article.

Something about the argument falls very flat to me. The central point is how sexism in the Avatar-verse isn't so bad, and thus homophobia cannot exist.... Almost like they are two different issues? I understand and agree with the fact that one of the roots of homophobia is heterosexism, but there is more to it than that.

''Our point is, women are just like…there in this universe. They’re not even treated any differently, barring the few exceptions we described above.''

Like, no... Strong women exist, yes. .. That doesn’t mean the universe isn't significantly sexist. The show has chosen to focus on these women, but that doesn’t mean all women have the same life experience... Look at our world, there have always been strong successful women, who rise to the top and make history...By that logic, the real world isn't significantly sexist and therefore institutionalized homophobia simply cant exist, why? Becuase there are strong women.. (???)

'''Any character who said something sexist got immediate, negative feedback, or was ignored, because that’s super weird of them. '''

Or its because they where talking to the protagonists, who are good people, and therefore don’t go along with sexist comments.

''What structural sexism could exist with this history? ((referring to how badass Kyoshi was))''

So your point is, that Kyoshi was an incredibly high status, messianic figure, and so that would make everyone respect all women everywhere? Like... Look at real life.There have been many prophetesses and women who start cults because people think they can perform miracles and the like, and women who rise high in religious establishments, and female saints... Has exposure to what are ostensibly powerful magical women been shown to change societal attitudes toward all women? Joan of Arc was a very forceful character, and she and her followers believed she could speak to God directly... Did this give the patriarchs of the day epiphanies about the intrinsic value of women?

'''But…there’s no societal dominance that men have over women in this world to be upheld, at least not on a broader scale. If there was, we couldn’t have had characters like Toph or Kuvira get the general reception that they did: full acceptance and respect.'''

????? No societal dominance??? How about arranged marriages? We know the monarchies of the Fire and Water nations did it, so I assume their nobility and the small folk follow suit, to a greater or lesser extent. And again, on the Toph and Kuvira point.. Exceptions don’t disprove the rule. High status women and gays don’t negate the power structures in society.

'''Please, tell us how the concern over Korra not being accepted fits with the world we just described. Who would challenge her? Who would be stupid enough? And how would the potential for that feedback be great enough that she actually needs to navigate cautiously? What are she and Asami in danger of, exactly? Also if this had been such an issue, wouldn’t Asami have exhibited slightly less than the extreme thirst for Korra that we witnessed in Book 3?'''

Surely you understand that their fears (and the fears of real young queer people) are more complex than simply 'I’m afraid I will be literally murdered immediately'... It can be about worrying that people wont love you as much, or wont be able to look at you the same way, even if they don’t outright reject you. It can be feeling that you have let people down, by not having the romantic destiny they had hoped you would have. It can feel humiliating as if the knowledge of it will give people a a glimpse into what you like sexually. There can be issues about which partner is perceived to be the 'top' and which is the 'bottom' and the status differentiation that can be seen to entail. And remember, Korra had no inhibitions about telling people, it was Asami who was reticent. I've never been much of an Asami fangirl, but her anxiety over this rather endeared her to me. It makes sense: she was raised by a man who had very extreme prejudices against a minority group, and Asami seems to maintained free thought about that issue her whole upbringing, but knew to be secret about it. Secrecy and fear of discover over that probably became her modus operandi and recurred over the awakening of her feelings for Korra. Hiroshi was a public figure and must have imparted a sensitivity to reputation and public appearances to Asami. Asami was also bereft of her mother, which may have lead to complications about how she feels about and interacts with women. I think its very understandable that she is not 100% gung-ho about coming out. Also, I don’t understand how anyone can say their flirting was obvious... Grl, I remember how utterly scandalized 90% of the audience was with Korrasami.

'''That is why, in a general sense, homophobia cannot exist on an institutionalized level in this universe, and certainly not to a degree where the spiritual leader would feel unsafe being openly bisexual.'''

?????????? 'Unsafe'??? There are more dimensions to this than physical safety. Spiritual leaders don’t get a free pass form wider society to do whatever they want without reproach. If you do believe that homophobia comes (almost) entirely form sexism, and you have acknowledged that there is at least some level of sexism in the universe then by your own reasoning there is room for some atmosphere of homophobia, or at least an atmosphere that is not super enlightened or welcoming to The Gays.

''Yet homophobia was introduced in this comic—more or less immediately after Korra and Asami returned to the “real world.” (As an aside, we’re really not fond of *that* particular messaging.)'''

This is a personal comment rather than the Well Reasoned Feedback of the rest of this response post but... That rings quite true in my experience.. When you are with someone, especially when things are new and uncertain, it is like entering another world, where the rules are different. When you come from a world where same sex attraction is absent or is seen as distasteful or just plain bad, and then you meet someone whom you fall in love with.. It can give rise to feelings of disassociation and other-worldliness. And then when the vacation is over, suddenly you are back in the real world, and suddenly the worries about what people will think come at you like a wall.

'''(Talking about Kyas gay history lesson) To put it bluntly, we find all of this incomprehensible given what we know from ATLA and LoK. Literally everything is backwards.'''

Yeah I agree on this one.

''The description of the Water Tribes is more confusing. We wonder if Mike remembered that the Water Tribe was you know…a tribe. Family units are almost always deemphasized in such society, and we know they were in the Southern Water Tribe during ATLA’s run, because we saw it. It was one village with everyone having a collective responsibility to one another.'''

Umm, 'family units de-emphasised''' like no, Marriage was central to the culture... The thing that established family units.

''Let’s start with the Fire Nation. We already explained that it was quite canonically egalitarian. '''

I think this is wishful thinking.... We're never explicitly told that male primogeniture is in effect but.. Look at this family tree...

See any female Fire Lords (before Izumi)? Nope, all male. Did the firstborn happen to be male for 4 straight generations? Or is something else being implied? See how the women are not prominent, and most aren’t even warranted physical appearances.

''Azula was treated incredibly seriously and respectfully by everyone she interacted with, be it the governor of New Ozai, or her ship’s captain. '''

Dude... She is literally the princess. The heir apparent to the throne.... And her being privileged and respected is ... evidence of egalitarianism???

''there was simply no indication that a ‘Fire Lord Azula’ would have been met with a single eye blink.''

Female heirs inherit the throne... This is kind of standard procedure for dynasties with no male heir... Not so rare in history.. And remember, Ozai did invent an even higher seat for himself: the Phoenix King' so Azula is still subservient.

''But any systemic sexism was gone by Ozai’s time given what we saw in ATLA, so… Was Ozai a wonderful feminist reformer for the Fire Nation’s military?''

Sozin outlawed same-sex relationships, which apparently also implies he was sexist and against women in the military? These issues are linked, sure, but they aren’t the same issue.

''Are gay couples somehow targeted without women’s rights being an issue at all? We certainly can’t think of many examples in our world where this was the case.'''

???? Hmm, can we think of societies where the cause of women’s rights are more advanced than gay rights ??? Let me think about thisss... Hmmmmmmmmmmm. How about the entire western world, who have all but secured equal rights under the law for women, but have only just begun to examine how laws affect LGBT+ people... Of course, sexism isn't solved completely, even in the legal arena, but they are literally a hundred years ahead of gay rights.

''' He was trying to wage war on the biggest kingdom; he was seriously going to begin oppressing his own citizens, all of whom would probably take issue with his out-of-the-blue hyperfocus on gay couples? What, had he been scapegoating them for years, laying the groundwork? '''

Rulers with supremacist and imperialist ambitions begin by fracturing, scapegoating and oppressing groups within their own country.. Yep, again this is quite true to life.. I don’t understand why this seems unrealistic to you, especially since you have noted the gestapo imagery... (Which I do agree is anachronistic and out of nowhere)).

''More to the point, if this shit was happening, there would be rioting! Civil Wars! ''

The gay 'community' has never existed as a unified mass ever in history before now. Homosexuality was a practice not an identity. People didn't think of themselves as gay, and didn't unite or think about their legal rights the way we do today... Even in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries, where tiny tiny groups where coalescing, there was never any alliances big enough or confident enough to form militias or rally the general population.

'''we refuse to believe that this wouldn’t have been an issue EVERY SINGLE AVATAR would have dealt with until it was fully rectified.'''

Just.. What?? Why should we assume that ANY avatar even significantly recognized homosexuality, and even if they did, why do we assume its on their priority list? This is so anachronistic.. We may as well wonder why any Air Avatar didn't outlaw meat eating, or any lowborn avatar didn't invent marxism, or any female avatar would outlaw arranged marriages or male primogeniture. We seem to be assuming here that every avatar is a moral paragon and therefore is automatically a 2017 post-structuralist inter-sectional feminist, whose number 1 goal is to bring about liberal utopia, nad comes out of the box with enlightened understandings about homosexuality.

''we’re still left with the questions about feminist-reformer-Ozai, who went on to champion his own daughter (and a younger sibling to boot) as his successor, so…?'''

Well, Ozai himself was a younger sibling, remember, who thought he was more fit to rule because he was more psychopathic than his empathetic elder sibling, like Zuko and Azula.

''(Talking about Kyoshi) If there had somehow had been homophobia present on a large scale, we can’t imagine that Kyoshi, being queer herself, would have allowed this to continue. In fact, wouldn’t she have used the Dai Li to eradicate it, at least to the point where she could find acceptance?'''

It seems like although she practiced same sex relationships, she didn't add 'bisexual' to her identity. Quite probably the label didn't exist.. Like in real life, same sex relationships where seen as a sexual practice, not something you are or that you would publicly speak about, even if it wasn’t a super shameful secret. I dont think it implied that Kyoshi lived in shame.. She dosent seem the type to hung up on what people think of her at all. Kya just meant that people didn't acknowledge or understand that part of her.

''but we have to imagine she’d be able to have influenced the laws and protections to at least have “found acceptance” and effect change. '''

I feel like your perspective is thoroughly couched in a modern day 'coming out' narrative and advocacy and reform culture... That said, it does seem that Mike wrote this from a perspective that is also jarringly modern, so maybe its appropriate to match him in that.

''There literally can’t be large-scale and widespread homophobia in a place with such an ineffectual centralized government. ''

Literally what. Like.. Think of any ineffectual centralized government in the entire world... Okay, now tell me, is the society it presides over homophobic? The answer is always yes no matter where you think of..

''The issue is that with a (mostly) closeted Kya, it means the Avatar-verse is actually worse than our own world. She’s like a celebrity (secluded acolytes with Air Nation blinders on excluded). She’s the daughter of one of the most famous people who ever lived, ever. ''

Why is this surprising? I don’t understand.. Like in the last 30 years in the west is the only time and place in history where public figures could come out and be like 'Yo guys I'm exclusively sexually and romantically attracted to people of the same sex as me, kthnxbye'. And even then, it has diminished careers and tarnished reputations...

''We’re expected to believe that Aang would have let his daughter feel unsafe to be herself? We’re expected to believe that Katara—KATARA—would have let such an injustice stand?'''

Well, Kya did say Aang was nothing but supportive.. But, even if your parents are great, you are still a tiny minority in a big wide world.. Shes almost 2 generations removed from Korra and Asami... It just feels very true to life and poignant for Kya to have gone through these issues. We know she was a drifter for much of her life, and has commitment issues. Indecision and internal conflict are very congruent with unease about sexual identity.

''On a Watsonian level, the implication of this portrayal (where Korra and Asami need to proceed with caution) is that this homophobia exists on an institutionalized level,''

You are continually looking for 'institutionalized' homophobia to explain why Korra and Asami have qualms about coming out. I would like to differentiate institutionalized homophobia from cultural homophobia. It doesn’t seem that explicitly anti-gay laws of governmental bodies are at play here, it seems more... interpersonal.. They are just fretting that people would treat them differently, or look at them differently, that’s all. And that’s quite understandable, considering it seems then neither of them knew they could be attracted to women before this relationship. It has changed how they see themselves.

''.....Toph or Azula or Mai or Lin or Suyin or Kuvira can’t really exist, at least not without getting a ton of gendered feedback all the time.''

#stop #the #conflation #of #sexism #and #homophobia. They are not separate but they are not the same. Any society at any time can provide examples of individual women being prominent while the gays are still invisible or thrown under the buses.

'''Boy oh boy do we love thinking about our faves letting their daughter live in abject terror, and the shit Kya herself must have gone through!''

It is sad to think about... But.. the critical examination of Aang as a parent is kind of a running theme already isn’t it? He was supportive to her, and at some point people do become adults and their issues are their own, and cant be laid at the feet of their parents anymore.

''Especially given that Turf Wars suggests a worse world than our own with regards to homophobic feedback. You know…for kids!''

Does it? Lets recap how things went: girl tells parents she is dating another girl. Mom: cool dude.

Dad: cool man, be careful.

Korra: fuck you dad.

Korra: *tells lesbain aunt*.

Kya: samesies. it used to be bad but no bigs.

Korra: *to friends* guys im ghey as frick

Friends: cool dude.

That’s really the best scenario anyone could hope for today, isn't it?

'''The Kya conversation didn’t land for us, not just because it broke from the canon of the franchise, or because it began with a 60-year-old woman Korra and Asami are not particularly close to offering an uninvited remark about how beautiful of a couple they are (are we alone in thinking that this would be weird??), but because the entire premise of the conversation is a little cringe-worthy in our opinion.

First of all, Kya lives in the Southern Water Tribe with her mother. Yeah, she’s not glued there, and we know she’s helping with relief efforts at the evacuee camp, but our point is that a conscious decision was made to warp her to the United Republic, simply because “who else could offer gay advice but another gay?”''

Yeah same. It does feel that this was written by a heterosexual who doesnt quite understand what its like, though to be fair so does this article (burn).

'''we have to assume the rather affluent Hiroshi Sato got his daughter education that included these basic lessons.''

Idk, minorities being cut out of the history we teach to young people rings true to life tbh.

___

Sorry, didn’t mean to be overly critical. I think I’m biased toward liking Turf Wars because of my own personal experience rather than any actual merit it has. I look forward to reading Fandom Followings thoughts on part 2.

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bespectacledbellman · 7 years

Text

Who to Vote For – Episode III

For the third time in as many years, the British public – that’s me and you, in most probability – are again heading to the ballot box. I won’t be. I’m a postal voter. I’m not tromping off to some church or primary school.

If you’re reading this, the likelihood is that you don’t really know who to vote for. Or you’ve read some of my previous rants and think this one might be equally amusing. I’ll try my best, but I promise nothing but a strong and stable article... Sorry.

This year seems one of the strangest elections in modern times, because much like a soap opera there is an underlying storyline arc that affects everything: Brexit. True, most elections tend to be dominated by one matter or another, often the economy and immigration. Brexit bundles both of these and more into one glorious package of foggy doom whose very mystery frightens the pants off of most rational people.

However, I will refrain from talking about Brexit – the deal has been done, Article 50 has been triggered. We’re going. It’s now we look at who wishes to lead us and who amongst the political class has the ability to successfully govern an “independent” Britain over the next five years. Those leaders are our current Prime Minister Theresa May, the Marxist renegade Jeremy Corbyn, and the sinner Tim Farron.

All the polls indicate that Theresa May and the Conservatives are heading towards a landslide victory that will rival that of any other Tory Prime Minister. Whilst the polls have been wrong before, it does seem likely that a Conservative victory is in the stars: most who favour Brexit will likely vote for the Tories, especially now that UKIP is a de facto dead duck. Incorporate the usual Conservative base and that’s a strong and stable foundation. (Sorry, again. That’s the last one.) This is before we wonder about Labour voters or floating voters who usually vote for Labour.

The workers’ party has changed immensely since the victory in 1997 of a young visionary named Tony Blair and the candid camera comedy of Gordon Brown, whilst an unfortunate Ed Miliband failed in 2015 in a bacon butty battering. Following Mr Miliband on Twitter, I genuinely fail to understand how his humour, charisma and personality failed to get across. Now Labour is led by Corbyn, who has won two leadership battles in as many years and completely polarises the left. To some he is the Obi-Wan Kenobi of the political world; to others he is a fossil of bygone times that leaves him looking more like the reincarnation of Michael Foot than a successor to the fresh face of a ’97 Blair. His views obfuscate official Labour policy and his flip-flop with the European Union leaves even his strongest supporters sometimes baffled.

Therefore for many floating voters and traditional reds, Labour doesn’t seem to be an option. Yet many will be loathe to vote for the Conservatives, especially as modern day Toryism seems imbued with cruel tax-cuts for the wealthy and public sector-cuts for everyone else. This is slightly unfair as there is sound economic theory for doing both; plus the record of David Cameron, now overshadowed immensely by the gloom of a failed referendum, isn’t actually a “typically Tory” CV: legalisation of gay marriage, increase of the minimum wage and increasing the lower tax threshold to name a few. Yes, there are worries about privatisation of hospitals and healthcare, but as a patient of a private dental clinic, I can tell you it’s not bad. The apparent demise of the NHS is, however, deeply troubling.

We are left then with floating voters who cannot stomach Corbyn, yet are conscientious about public spending and public healthcare (and foxes, as May is rumoured to reintroduce their hunting) to enough of a degree that Conservatism isn’t for them. Who are they left with?

The Liberal Democrats, apparently.

The yellow bird hasn’t quite flown the vicious nest left behind by the tuition fees debacle in the coalition government between 2010 and 2015. People I have spoken to still feel that the Liberal Democrats either lied to or betrayed their voters – this is a fundamental misunderstanding of politics that is either ignorant or naive. The Liberal Democrats may have entered into government, but they did not win their election. This means that their manifesto – a modus operandi for if they win the election – is practically null and void. Nick Clegg was smart to barter the tuition fees increase – which was essentially a certainty anyway – in order to gain a much-needed referendum on electoral reform. For those unaware, electoral reform very rarely happens, simply because the party in power has directly benefitted from the current electoral system, therefore has no need to change it. Unfortunately, Clegg and his centrist posse bartered weakly for the Alternative Vote, a system so evilly convoluted it may as well had been written in Klingon, instead of pressing for Proportional Representation or a partially-elected House of Lords. If electoral reform had succeeded, it would have meant a weakening of Tory and Labour strongholds and a welcome embrace to third, fourth and even fifth parties to the House of Commons. Nick Clegg held the long-term view that electoral reform would strengthen his party to implement the policies they stand for, sacrificing a short-term policy that failed to win them an election.

Now our head is around that, why not vote for the Liberal Democrats? They have championed the rights of practically everyone in the country from native Brits to immigrants, women, the LGBTQ+ community, students (ummm...), low- and middle-income earners, and animals. They’re almost like the Avengers if they were activists. Yet they are amateurish – this is an election where they can push the fact that they support integration with Europe, whilst respecting the Brexit vote. This is an election where they can unconditionally guarantee the rights of EU migrants in the UK right now. Instead, Farron has been drawn into some debate beyond satire that he thinks gay sex is a sin (how Farron’s personal opinion on the bedroom antics of others is important, I’ll never know), distracting voters from Lib Dem policies. Meanwhile their post-EU statements of another referendum, another referendum for when we leave, blah blah blah, has just confused people. A clear message must come out of the Lib Dem camp to combat the opaque and random policies found on the back of fag-packets in Labour Party HQ and the seemingly heartless ones from Millbank Tower. Only then will voters understand that the Liberal Democrats are a genuine third option.

Independents are always a good option. If you really care who your representative is in Parliament, explore the Independents and small-party candidates standing in your constituency. A vote for them is a vote against the Estbalishment (which everyone apparently hates but always seems to vote for) and allows them to reclaim their £500 deposit if they receive 5% of all votes in their constituency. There are currently four Independent MPs sitting in Parliament – evidence that it can be done. Because they have no party loyalty, they are unequivocally representing their constituents, which is how parliamentary democracy is meant to be – at least in theory.

Those are essentially your options. Staunch supporters will vote for their party regardless. Traditional Labour voters anxious over a Corbyn premiership have three choices: support the man who has won the leadership twice, support your local Labour candidate if you like them and hope Corbyn will resign after a bad election, or vote for another candidate entirely. It makes sense for Labour supporters to turn their vote to the Liberal Democrats, whose policies are closest to pre-Corbyn Labour, or an Independent that they identify with. Though the latter won’t make a huge impact on the national scale, they will serve their constituents well; the Lib Dems as a strong third party would be capable of ensuring legislation passed by government is fairer, or block any that isn’t in tandem with other opposition parties. They’re a safe option – not exciting, but reliable, with the long-term interests of the British people at heart.

If you live in any of the devolved areas of the UK, I must confess I lack sufficient knowledge of your needs and issues to provide specific advice. In Scotland it seems that a strong SNP would push for a second independence referendum, which I believe the Scottish people have every right to. In the face of a Conservative government that refuses to comprehend such a matter, even after the constitutional maelstrom of Brexit, it’s in the interest of the Scottish electorate to vote against the Conservatives. Wales and Northern Ireland seem to me unpredictable – I couldn’t even hazard a guess what colour they will go come June 8th.

No matter who you vote for, my message as always is make sure you do vote. Conservative, Labour, Liberal Democrat, Independent or any party, make sure you voice your opinion via the ballot box. If you don’t, you lose the right to voice your opinion for five years, as those who did vote shouldn’t have any respect for your political views. Personally I would advocate for the Liberal Democrats, as only a centrist approach will help to unify a nation becoming increasingly fractured.

If you disagree, great! That’s a strong and stable (that’s definitely the last one, I promise) parliamentary democracy! Just make sure you vote.

If you aren’t registered, you can do so at https://www.gov.uk/register-to-vote.

#politics #uk #uk election #elections 2017 #theresa may #jeremy corbyn #tim farron #Conservatives #Labour Party #Liberal Democrats

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