#full on sobbing um. fuck!!!! I did better leaving your state god. babe we have to live together soon ok? promsie me that?

[theood]

Headache from what one can assume is not letting myself cry. I already feel a gaping hole in my heart. He should still be here with me.

I think... I think walking into my room will really do it. I got so used to him being there, to see him smile at me when I walked in. My room is going to feel so...lifeless.

I thought the 2 weeks was going slow. But it really feels like just yesterday we picked him up. I don't know how I'm going to make it till next we can meet again.

I just wanna stay with him forever, is that too much to ask?

#elias howls #I am NOT okay!!!!! I am not fucking ok. I will cry and snot right now I am SERIOUS #Beverly god I already miss you so much is time going to make see you latera easier? or harder? #I want you to hold my hand and squeeze it; three times means I love you. Don't you know? I can teach you. Hold mine tight okay? #I want to share my bed again and whine when you go to leave. Can't we stay like that for 5 more minutes? Just 5 more I promise...okay? I #won't fall back asleep to keep you close to me. #full on sobbing um. fuck!!!! I did better leaving your state god. babe we have to live together soon ok? promsie me that? #god how am I gonna sleep tonight? god. I don't know. I don't know. I don't. Hold me again soon please

[artificialqueens]

Undone, Chapter 28 (Bitney) - Stephanie/Veronica

A/N: Hey guys. To anyone who’s still reading this story, thank you for your patience between chapters, I know it’s been slow! Here’s a link to the previous chapters. Thank you so much to some very patient and helpful betas: @opalescent-cheetah, @artificialpuddle, @blackhighheels 

Chapter Summary: Bianca faces the dreaded lawyer meeting. 

NOTE: The role of Bianca’s divorce attorney has been recast as Asia O’Hara. 

TW: Emotional abuse, physical intimidation, gaslighting, PTSD 

***

“B...don’t you want to take a break?” Courtney tries to speak casually, but she can feel the edge of frustration creeping in. Bianca has spent all weekend at the sewing machine, creating garments at a manic pace. She’s barely slept since her call with Asia on Thursday, and only eats or sleeps when Courtney forces the issue. What began as concern is now full-on anxiety over her health. “Come on...we could go for a walk. Or take a nap. And I made that pesto thing you like, so-”

“I just need fifteen minutes,” Bianca mumbles. If she can keep her hands busy, she doesn’t have to think about Asia’s words turning over and over in her mind.

Don’t expect any resolutions right away.

Be sure to send me the sonogram pictures and a blood test. They’re going to want immediate proof.

No one can predict how he’s going to react.

She doesn’t have time to stop and even acknowledge Courtney; she has no desire to bring Courtney into the firestorm of bullshit racing through her mind right now.

“You said that an hour ago.” Courtney sighs and walks closer, sitting on the edge of the table right beside her sewing machine.

“I have to finish these pants.” Bianca grits her teeth and presses the pedal harder, shoving the tweed fabric through the surger.

Courtney puts a hand on top of the machine and states matter-of-factly, “B, you’re working too hard.”

“Maybe you don’t work hard enough,” Bianca snaps back.

The second the words leave her mouth, dreads surges through her veins, making her heart race and her skin heat up. A terrible feeling creeps into her stomach. This is how it starts. A snide comment here, a sarcastic insult there. Why does she always alienate people? What’s wrong with her?

Her eyes are misty when she finally dares to raise them, to look at Courtney and assess the damage. Only when she does, it’s not an angry face glaring down at her. Courtney’s expression is a bit surprised, but mostly...amused?

“Perhaps,” Courtney says with a giggle. “But my point still stands. You need to take a break.”

Bianca nods, trying to get a grip on her emotions, which at the moment feel all over the map. She’s relieved, mostly, that Courtney isn’t angry or offended, but also drowning in guilt, and her heart still races with leftover panic.

Courtney tilts her head, noticing the color in her cheeks, the glassy-eyed stare, the way her shoulders stiffen.

“Are you okay?”

Bianca nods, afraid that if she speaks, it’ll all come spilling out. All the darkness that she’s been desperately trying to hold back. The fear, the anger, the exhaustion. Courtney runs a hand through her hair, a motion that would normally be welcome and soothing. But right now, it feels almost oppressive, making Bianca’s muscles tense even more.

When she still doesn’t speak, Courtney drags a chair over and sits down right beside her. She takes both of Bianca’s hands in hers.

“Please tell me what’s wrong, Bianca.”

“I…” She doesn’t even know how to begin. The whole time she’s been living here, she’s been trying to force herself to listen to what everyone says about Jared. That what happened between them wasn’t her fault. And she does believe it, to a degree. But sometimes in her darkest hours, there’s still a sliver of doubt that creeps in.

What if it was my fault?

Because she remembers how sweet and loving and generous he was when they first met. How he showered her with love and affection. Went out of his way to make her feel special and loved and desired.

Just like Courtney does.

He wasn’t angry or cruel when they first got together. He became that way over months and years, and Bianca sometimes can’t shake the feeling that she made him that way. And even worse...her deepest fear, one she has barely even acknowledged to herself, is that not only did she make him like that. But that something inside her is so broken that she actually needs that destructive energy. That she can’t be in a normal relationship, or accept normal love.  

That no matter what she does, she will end up destroying the goodness in Courtney with her anger, her bitterness.

She’s not trying to hide these thoughts from Courtney, not exactly. She’s just so deeply ashamed, so terrified of being exposed as a monster.  

Courtney hasn’t gone anywhere. She’s still stroking the back of Bianca’s hands, waiting patiently for an explanation that Bianca knows isn’t coming. Because now, even if she wanted to, she can’t get any words out.

As hard as she tried to keep everything in, Bianca can’t stop the hot, bitter tears from streaming down her cheeks. She takes a few gasping breaths, but it’s not enough, not enough air. When she begins to hyperventilate, Courtney goes from gentle, supportive concern to overt worry, cupping her cheeks.

“Hey...look at me. We’re gonna breathe. In….out…” She nods as Bianca copies her breathing, desperately trying to pull herself together.

“Court, I’m sorry, I just don’t know how to explain,” she chokes out.  

“It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything. Keep breathing...” She takes an exaggerated breath in.  

“No, I want to tell you...but I just…” Bianca’s breath hitches again.

“I know. I know you do.” Courtney gently brushes the tears from her cheeks. “But it can wait-”

“But you deserve an explanation.”

“It can wait,” Courtney repeats. “Just breathe.”

Bianca nods, finally releasing some of the tension in her shoulders. She sits silently, tears still trickling down her face, until her breathing is back to normal. She lets Courtney help her to her feet, pulling her into an embrace.

“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I’m just...sometimes I get so scared that you’re gonna end up hating me.”

Courtney pulls back, looking into her eyes.

“I could never hate you. Ever,” she says.

“You say that now, but-” a sob escapes from Bianca’s chest, but she tries to push through. “But I say stupid shit, and I don’t mean it, but I-”

Courtney’s gently kissing away her tears. Her unending patience suddenly feels stifling, like Bianca will never be worth it.

“I know this is gonna end. I know I’ll fuck it up, I always do.”

Bianca watches Courtney take a deep breath, terrified that she’s already begun to destroy what they’ve worked so hard to build. Heart in her throat, stomach in knots, as she waits for the inevitable rejection.

“Look at me,” she says, waiting for Bianca’s eyes to meet hers before continuing. Saying adamantly, “I’m not him.”

Unable to respond with anything more than a slight nod, Bianca bites her lip.

“Do you hear me? I’m not him.” Courtney pulls her close again, holding her tight, lips grazing her ear. Bianca feels weak and dizzy from crying, finally allowing herself to lean on Courtney for support.

She’s not sure how long they stand there, but it’s long enough for the body heat to make her comfortably sweaty, for her lips to find Courtney’s, brushing against her in a light kiss.

“How are you doing?” Courtney murmurs. “Wanna lie down?”

“No.” Bianca tucks her face against Courtney’s neck.

“Wanna dance it out?”

“Definitely not.”

“Why not?!” Courtney asks, giggling. “Endorphins will make you feel better.”

“Good idea. Let’s have sex,” Bianca says against her skin, teeth grazing her jaw.

“Mmm, no. If we have sex when you’re upset, you’re gonna associate sex with trauma, which will take a lot of the fun out of it. No sex,” Courtney finishes decisively.  

“Ugh, you’re so bossy.”

“I’m bossy?” Courtney pulls back, one eyebrow so high it’s nearly to her hairline.

Bianca laughs, finally breaking the tension in the air. She reaches up to cup Courtney’s cheek, tired and grateful and relieved all at the same time.

“Can I make you a cup of tea?” Courtney asks.

“Yeah, alright,” she agrees, settling back into her chair with a sigh.

***

Courtney would never admit it out loud, but the truth is, she’s nervous. She’s seen these ultrasound pictures before--mostly in movies and TV shows--and she’s never seen anything but a floating amorphous blob. Is she gonna have to lie and tell Bianca that a blurry mass is beautiful? What’s she going to say when it comes up on the screen?

It turns out, her worrying is all for naught. Because when she finally does look at the screen, Bianca’s hand clasped in both of hers, what she sees is the shifting image of a baby.

“Oh my god!” she can’t help exclaiming. “It looks like a person!”

“What were you expecting?” Bianca laughs.

“Um...more like...somewhere between a potato and a spaceship.”

“Ahh.” Bianca nods, then deadpans, “So are you disappointed?”

“Yeah, I was really excited about that spaceship,” Courtney giggles, nuzzling against her and squeezing her hands.

The warm, affectionate mood is killed a little by how somber Bianca seems once they’re in the car. Courtney looks over at her, reaching over to touch her cheek.

“You alright, babe?”

“Yeah. I’m just sending some shit to Asia.” Bianca looks up from her phone, biting her lip.

“Right.” Courtney’s hit by a wave of sadness, mostly for Bianca. As excited as she knows Bianca is for the baby, as much as she’s dreamed about motherhood, she knows that the bittersweet reality must never fully leave her mind. The dark cloud of her divorce hangs over her all the time, even when she’s not talking about it--even when she seems fine.

Courtney leans over the center console to brush her lips against Bianca’s temple.

After letting out a deep sigh, Bianca throws her arms around Courtney’s shoulders and buries her face into her neck.

***

Courtney stands outside the bathroom door, contemplating how best to approach Bianca this morning. She’s getting ready for what’s likely going to be a long, terrible day. Her first meeting with Jared and the lawyers, where they are supposed to (hopefully) hash out the main points of their divorce settlement. She knows that Bianca has been anxious and worried all week, even though she’s been putting on a brave face.

But last night, it seemed like it all really hit her hard. She laid awake for hours, letting Courtney hold her and talk to her about everything and nothing, just to remind her that she wasn’t alone. Courtney hadn’t drifted off until the first rays of dawn began to slant through the window, and she’s not positive whether Bianca slept at all.

Knowing that this was coming, Courtney’s been planning a surprise weekend getaway for them. Now, though, Courtney wonders if this kind of surprise after a long day with the lawyers will be too much. Maybe she didn’t think the plan through very well. She bites her lip and pushes the door open.

The counter is littered with hair appliances and makeup and assorted beauty products, what looks like everything Bianca owns spread out and opened. There’s not a hair out of place, and her face is fully beat. Compared to the relaxed, softer look she’s been moving towards since she moved in with Courtney, it’s almost jarring to see her this glammed up again.

“Hey,” Courtney says, moving toward her slowly, careful not to disturb any of the open powders and pots and bottles. She offers a smile, adding, “You look beautiful.”

Bianca can’t help but feel defensive. Of course, Courtney is giving her a simple compliment. The kind she gives her all the time, every day. But her insecurity immediately turns it into a judgement.

“I’m not trying to impress him,” she says. Her feelings for Jared, at this point, are crystal clear--she has no interest in getting back together with him, is sure she never will. But for some stupid reason, she can’t bear walking into that office looking different than she had when they were married. It feels, in an unjustifiable way, like that would be admitting something to him; it feels like that would make her even more vulnerable than she already is. “I know it’s silly.”

“It’s not silly,” Courtney replies. She can see the anxiety on Bianca’s face, her tense muscles, the little line where her brow furrows. Her heart aches for how scared Bianca must be feeling. She reaches out and gently touches Bianca’s sleeve. “And you don’t have to justify anything to me. Do whatever you need to prepare.”

Bianca puts down her mascara and sighs, closes her eyes. She feels anything but prepared. What in the world made her think that a little makeup and a curling iron would fix that? Courtney takes her hands.

“Hey...you can do this.”

Bianca looks up, her blue eyes cloudy with pain. She hopes it’s true, but a nagging voice in the back of her head is saying the opposite.

“I just...wish it was over.”

“I know.” Courtney tucks a lock of hair back, gently running a thumb against the shell of Bianca’s ear as she does so. “But hey...later today, it will be. And as soon as you’re done, you’re gonna come back home, and then I can tell you about your surprise.”

“Did I ever tell you that I hate surprises?” Bianca says, biting back a smile.

“You have. But you’re gonna like this one.” Courtney winds her arms tighter around Bianca’s neck. “I promise. And if you don’t...then, we can do it another time.”

“Yeah? So it’s something to do?” Bianca chases Courtney’s lips with her own, pressing her against the counter.

“You’re gonna ruin your lipstick…” Courtney slyly evades both the question and the kiss, teasing her.

“Worth it,” Bianca murmurs, finally capturing Courtney’s lips in a sweet, soft kiss.

***

Asia is true to her word. When Bianca arrives, they spend the morning together, going over the game plan and wish list. After a short lunch, most of which remains untouched, Asia escorts her into a conference room and waits with her, by her side, until Jared and his attorney show up.  

Bianca keeps her eyes down, trained on the blank legal pad in front of her. She can’t look at him. Even knowing he’s there turns her stomach. She does glance at his lawyer a few times. A petite Asian woman with dark eyes and glossy hair. He’s smart to have hired a woman. She’s not sure why it surprises her.

When the arbitrator arrives, she immediately gets down to business. The attorneys spend a few minutes discussing the big ticket items - their condo, the joint retirement account. Bianca is actually relieved that there’s a pre-nup, because it seems like it’s going to make everything go faster. She allows herself, for the briefest moment, to imagine that this might happen quickly.

Before they drill down into the details, Asia hands a paper across the table. It’s a disclosure statement, short and to the point, along with a copy of her last blood test. The most recent sonogram. The arbitrator looks it over, nods, and hands a copy to Jared’s attorney.

Bianca can sense Jared’s energy when his lawyer shows him. She hears his hands slam against the table, hears his lawyer do her best to quickly calm him down, get him to hush.

Her eyes are downcast, blurry with tears that begin to drip slowly down her nose, splashing on the legal pad. Asia puts a hand on her back.

“Do you need a break?” Asia whispers, and Bianca nods vigorously.

***

The meeting seems to disintegrate quickly once Bianca leaves the room, which doesn’t surprise her at all. She knew full well that this news was going to be a wrench in the plan. That Jared’s limited time of playing nice would be over.

Asia’s assistant brings her a glass of water, which she attempts to drink slowly, reminding herself to breathe every few seconds. She flexes her fingers and toes whenever they start to tingle, brings her focus back to the physical.

When Asia enters her office to give the update, she’s prepared. Jared is unwilling to negotiate any further. His lawyer quarantined him alone in another room to have his tantrum and requested to schedule a follow-up meeting in a few weeks. No financial agreements will happen until custody is worked out. They knew this would most likely be the case, so now it’s a waiting game until they see what Jared asks for.

Bianca nods.

“Are they still here?”

“They’re packing up now,” Asia tells her. “You’re welcome to stay here until you feel ready.”

“Thanks.”

Though all Bianca really wants is to go home, she takes her time, texting Courtney for a bit while she calms down. She doesn’t want to risk running into him in the lobby or at valet parking. She has a sick feeling when it’s time to go down to her car, and though she feels a bit silly, asks Asia if someone can walk her down.

Once she’s safely in her car, she breathes a sigh of relief. Soon she’ll be home; it’ll be over for the day. She’s even finding herself improbably excited for whatever surprise Courtney’s been planning all week. She takes a deep breath and pulls out.

Her relief is short-lived. At the parking gate, she rolls down her window to slide in her ticket, when Jared races up to the car like a bat out of hell, before she even knows what’s happening. He somehow manages to reach in, yanking the door open before she has a chance to react.

She has no idea what he’s screaming. All her brain can comprehend is the rage, the fury in his eyes as he rants at her, accuses her of all kinds of things. She knows she’s yelling back, telling him to stop, trying to pull her door closed, but he’s overpowering her, forcing her to listen to his tirade. It’s a complete out of body experience.

It must have been a hell of a commotion. Because the next thing Bianca knows, she’s somehow sitting on a bench by the elevators, head between her legs, as Asia’s heels come clicking towards her in a hurry.

“Bianca! Shit…” Asia sits beside her, places a hand on her back. “I’m so sorry. You’re supposed to be safe here.”

Bianca lifts her head. Her cheeks are wet with tears she doesn’t remember, and she scrubs at them with the sleeve of her jacket.  

“We’re gonna get statements from the guys down here, okay? I should be able to fast-track a restraining order.”

“Alright,” Bianca says, mind starting to spin. How are they supposed to negotiate a divorce under these conditions? What’s gonna happen to her baby?

“I don’t want you to drive right now. Is there someone we can call to pick you up?”

Bianca nods. Courtney’s waiting for her - probably expecting her to walk in the door at any moment. She pulls out her phone and goes to her recent calls with shaky fingers, then turns to Asia, grasping her sleeve.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Okay.” Asia takes the phone from her, glancing down at the screen. “I can handle it. Courtney? Is that your girlfriend?”

“Yeah.” Bianca closes her eyes, feeling useless and dumb, the way she always does when words fail her.

“I’ll fill her in, and then we can go upstairs to wait,” Asia tells her.

“Thanks,” is all Bianca can manage. She lowers her head again, praying for it all to be over quickly.

***

Last week, while filming a very awkward sex scene, Courtney let it slip to one of her favorite costars how stressed Bianca has been, and how she wished she could give her a break. He generously offered his house in Santa Barbara for the weekend, and Courtney figured that it would be the perfect way for Bianca to decompress after her meeting with the lawyers.

But all day, she’s been anxious. She was anxious while she packed their bags and loaded up the car, waiting to hear from Bianca. And she was anxious when Sasha arrived to pick up the puppies. So much that her friend immediately saw it and suggested that they have a cup of herbal tea while they wait for Bianca to finish.

Even after she gets the text that Bianca is on her way home, something gnaws at her stomach. She supposes that until she sees Bianca in person and knows that she’s truly okay, she won’t be able to feel better.

“Do you want me to wait with you until she gets home?” Sasha asks, a hand covering hers.

“Do you mind?” Courtney says, chewing on her bottom lip.

“Not at all.”

Courtney feels a little stupid and overly dramatic, but she’s grateful that Sasha is so perceptive. They chat about her students this term, and an art show she’s putting together, and when Courtney’s phone rings, she’s able to answer cheerfully.

“Hey baby, what’s up?”

“Hi, Courtney? This is Asia. Bianca’s attorney.”

Courtney feels her blood turning to ice, fear rushing through her.

“What’s wrong? Is she okay?!”

“She’ll be fine, but--Jared accosted her in the parking lot. She’s a bit shaken and I don’t think she should drive.”

“Oh, god.”

“Do you think you can come, and-”

“Of course!” Courtney exclaims. “Of course, I’ll be there in 20 minutes. Can you text me the address? I’m sorry, I just don’t have-”

“Absolutely, I’ll do that right now.”

“Thank you.” Courtney looks up at Sasha, panicked.

“Don’t worry, I’ll drive you.” Sasha’s already on her feet, placing the mugs into the sink and rinsing them. She grabs her keys and ushers the dogs into the carrier.

***

All Bianca feels is numb as she waits, fingers digging into the throw pillow in her lap. She has no idea how much time has passed when Courtney appears in the doorway, then flies straight to her.

Feeling Courtney’s arms around her, finally, unleashes something. She begins to cry, an unwelcome avalanche of tears that makes her hate herself even more.

“Baby…” Courtney crawls into her lap, stroking her hair and rocking her.

It feels like ages until she finds her voice again, choking out, “I’m sorry.”

“For what? You didn’t do anything wrong!” Courtney holds her tighter, cheek pressed to the top of her head. Her heart hammers in her chest, terrified of what Jared might do next, but knowing that her fears are nothing compared to what Bianca must be feeling.

“I’m just...sorry. I know you’ve been planning something, and I-”

“Oh jesus, Bianca, that doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you’re okay.” Courtney cradles her face and looks at her, eyes bright, brow furrowed in concern. “It was just a little weekend getaway thing, you know? We can do it another time.”

“Actually,” Asia interrupts, then looks a little chagrined when they turn to her. “Sorry for eavesdropping, I just wanted to tell you that it might be a good idea. For you to go out of town for a couple of days. I don’t want to freak you out, but...at least until the protective order is in place.”

“When will that be?” Bianca asks tiredly.

“Monday morning,” Asia says. “I promise. We have everything we need.”

Bianca nods.

“Well...if that’s what you want, we could go,” Courtney says, smoothing down her hair. “I have all our bags packed and in the car downstairs.

“What about the dogs?”

“They’re downstairs too. With Sasha. She drove me here because she was gonna watch them this weekend. Is that okay?”

Bianca nods, then asks quietly, “Can I see them first?”

“Of course!” Courtney leans forward to kiss the tears slipping down her cheeks. “Whatever you need.”

They sit together for a few more minutes, until Bianca feels composed again--as much as she can, considering the circumstances. Courtney slides off her lap and offers a hand, helping her to her feet.

The leave hand in hand, fingers laced together, Bianca gripping Courtney tightly to keep herself grounded. As they wait for the elevators, she manages to give Courtney a small, grateful smile.

#rpdr fanfiction #bianca del rio #courtney act #bitney #asia o'hara #sasha velour #oc #lesbian au #angst #fluff #undone #stephanie #veronica #tw emotional abuse and PTSD #tw physical intimidation #tw gaslighting

[nuggets-and-french-fries]

Sunsets & Whiskey Kisses: Chapter Forty Seven.

Note: Thank you @jobanan23​ for crossing your fingers for me to have this chapter out today.

===

More than a couple weeks had past and the colours of the leaves were starting to change as the autumn months crept closer.

The winds were cooler and Dakota was even more uncomfortable as she had just past her due date and their little girl wasn’t budging. She was already stubborn and Dakota just knew that with her brother’s influence, the little one was going to be feisty and test her and Chase’s patience.

It didn’t matter what she and Chase did to bring on labour, nothing worked. But that wasn’t the only trouble brewing.

Things between Anna and Jack hadn’t gotten any better. Ryleigh had even tried countless times to get the toddler to talk to her father but that was a no go.

The little stinker was refusing to even look at her father. For example, on Tuesday morning after breakfast, Ryleigh suggested that they go for a family walk and the entire walk, Anna held ducky over her eyes so she wouldn’t have to look at her father. She didn’t even care when she ran into the slide and fell on her butt at the park after Jack said he’d catch her at the end of the slide so that Ryleigh could feed Parker.

Of course being the little tomboy she was, Anna got up and removed her ducky long enough that she could see where to go.

It was really getting ridiculous to say the least.

So, with all of that being said, Halloween was about two and half weeks away and Jack decided to take matters with Anna ignoring him into his own hands.

“Ryleigh, I’m going to run into town really quick and pick up some things.” Jack announced as he rushed to the front door.

“Um, first of all, why are you going into town? And second of all, where the hell is my kiss?” She said as she finished up her lunch at the dining table.

“First of all, I came up with an idea that I think Anna would really like but for that to happen, I need art supplies and second of all, it’s right here.” He said as he ran over to his wife and kissed her.

Jack broke the kiss and ran out the door.

Ryleigh giggled at her husband’s antics and as soon as the door closed, Anna woke up from her nap.

“Hello, pretty girl. Did you have a good nap?” Ryleigh asked after she had gone upstairs to get the little girl.

“Yeah. Dada gone?” Anna asked and Ryleigh sighed.

“You are going to have to talk to him at some point.” Ryleigh stated.

“No, him mean.” Anna argued.

Ryleigh rolled her eyes. If Anna was like this now, God only knew what she would be like during puberty.

“I’m getting really annoyed with you two fighting. Yes dada was mean but you are being mean to him. You are hurting his feelings. He thinks you hate him and don’t love him anymore.” Ryleigh replied, not realizing that that’s how Anna feels with Parker around.

The little girl looked at her mother and frowned.

“That how I feel.” Anna pouted with her arms crossed over her chest.

Ryleigh’s heart broke.

“You think that because Parker was born, we love her more than we love you?” Ryleigh asked.

“Yeah.” Anna answered with a vigorous nod.

“Oh honey.” Ryleigh said as she kissed Anna’s cheek. “Dada and I love you very much. You are our miracle baby and you will always have a special place in our hearts.” Ryleigh explained.

Anna frowned even more and grumbled.

“You don’t believe me do you?” Ryleigh asked somewhat sadly.

“No.” Anna replied as she wriggled to get out of her mother’s grasp.

Ryleigh set her down and Anna stormed toward the stairs.

The mother defeatedly opened Anna’s curtains and joined her daughter at the top of the stairs. She opened the baby gate and they walked down.

“What do you want for lunch?” Ryleigh called as Anna walked into the living room.

“No food.” Anna shouted back with annoyance.

“Fine.” Ryleigh grumbled.

The woman set about filling Anna’s sippy cup with water and getting herself some tea.

“Here you go.” Ryleigh said as she passed Anna her cup and sat on the sofa.

“Tata.” Anna replied as she took it and climbed onto the sofa beside her mother and cuddled into her mother.

“Shall we watch your first movie?” Ryleigh asked. Anna nodded excitedly as she chugged a bunch of water.  

Ryleigh stood up and went to the dvd collection she and Jack had built over the years. She skimmed through the movies until her eyes landed on The Lion King.

The woman knew that this would be the first movie Anna would ever see but she also wanted to see her reaction to it.

“Do you want a treat while we watch it?” Ryleigh asked but Anna shook her head.

“Start.” Anna said as she pointed to the tv.

Ryleigh chuckled and put the movie in the dvd player before joining her daughter on the sofa.

“You ready sweet pea?” The mother asked and Anna nodded before cuddling up to her mother again.

Ryleigh grabbed the remote and pressed play.

As soon as the music started to play, Anna was hooked. She couldn’t even blinked as the bright colours and variety of animals flashed across the screen.

“Wow.” Anna whispered in wonderment. The wonderment wasn’t to last though.

As soon as the scene of Mufasa’s death came up, Ryleigh set her gaze on Anna, wondering what her reaction would be.

Anna looked at the screen with tears in her eyes and by the time that Simba was trying to wake his father, Anna’s tears were full sobs.

The little girl hid her face in her mother’s side and cried. Ryleigh felt terrible for having to make her daughter endure that.

“I’m home.” Jack called as he shut the door and kicked his boots off.

“Living room.” Ryleigh called and continued to rub her daughter’s back as she cried uncontrollably.

Jack walked into the living room and stopped when he saw what was going on.

“What happened?” He asked.

Upon hearing his voice, Anna pulled away from her mother and slid off the sofa before running up to her father. Jack picked her up and held her close.

“What’s wrong?” Jack asked as Anna hid her face in the crook of his neck like she always did when she was upset or shy.

Ryleigh simply pointed to the paused image on the screen and Jack looked at it. He saw Simba cuddled up next to his father.

Jack and Ryleigh looked at each other with slight confusion as to why it had upset the little girl so much.

Anna lifted her head slightly so that she could see her father’s face. Jack kissed her forehead and rubbed her back.

“What’s wrong, sweet pea?” Jack asked.

Anna lifted her small index finger and ran it over the scar on her father’s brow.

“Dada owie.” Anna said as she looked at the tv and back at her father.

It dawned on Jack and Ryleigh that Anna had associated the scene with Jack’s accident. They were surprised that Anna had remembered that as she was still very young at that point.

Jack cuddled her closer again and rubbed her back.

“My baby girl.” Jack whispered as he kissed the top of her head.

Ryleigh watched them cuddling each other and took a picture, sending it to her mother

<<They made up.>>

Even though Grace was out with George, she immediately texted back.

<<My sweet darlings. You’ll have to tell me all about it later. Give my love to my other kiddos.>>

Ryleigh smiled and put her phone down.

“Do you want to keep watching the movie?” Jack asked his daughter softly.

“Peas.” Anna said through her sniffles.

“Why don’t you and dada cuddle on the sofa and mama can sit in the comfy chair.” Ryleigh suggested.

Jack smiled at his wife and mouthed a silent thank you. Ryleigh nodded and moved to the comfy chair like she said she would. Jack sat on the sofa and leaned back.

“Lay down.” Anna said and Jack smiled.

The man laid down on his back and Anna laid on top of him whilst gripping onto his shirt tightly.

“Do you want a blanket?” Ryleigh questioned.

“Thank you babe.” Jack said.

Ryleigh stood up and covered her husband and daughter, tucking them in and making sure they were comfortable.

When she was sure they were ok, she went back to her chair and played the movie.

=

“I’m really glad they’re on good terms again.” Grace as she and George sat on the back porch swing cuddling.

“What happened between them?” George asked as he played with Grace’s hair.

“Jack was having a rough day and snapped at Anna. She was ignoring him but I guess something happened for her to be on terms with her father.” Grace explained.

“Was that when you brought Anna in that day and she was crying?” He asked. Grace nodded and looked up at him from her spot on his shoulder.

“Yeah. Thank you for giving her that ice-cream, it really cheered her up.” Grace said as she leaned in and kissed his lips.

They broke the kiss and George smiled at the woman in his arms.

“I love you.” He said, making Grace smile.

“I love you too.” She replied before kissing him again.

Their kisses grew hungry and passionate.

George broke the kiss and stood up. He smiled at Grace cheekily.

“What are you smiling at?” She asked with her own cheeky smile.

“Come on.” George replied as he held his hand out for her to take.

She accepted his hand and followed him inside. They walked upstairs and to Grace’s room.

Standing outside her room, George kissed his girlfriend before he opened the door.

He broke the kiss and took hold of her hand again, leading her into the room.

“What are you planning to do?” Grace questioned through her giggles.

“You’ll see.” He said slyly as he kicked the door shut.

=

Once the girls were in bed and sound asleep, Jack and Ryleigh sat on the sofa watching tv. Well, Ryleigh was watching tv and Jack was trying to tempt his wife into fooling around.

“Jackson, please stop. You’re just annoying me.” Ryleigh admitted after enduring his insistent staring and tongue movements.

The man refused to listen to her pleas for him to stop.

“So, what are you going to do when Anna tells you that her boyfriend does the same thing?” Ryleigh asked, hoping that he’d stop once and for all.

Jack stopped for a few seconds as he thought about telling him that. He eventually shook his head to rid the thought from his head. He continued with his attempts at wooing his wife.

“Oh my fucking shit Mason, you are annoying.” Ryleigh grumbled as she threw the remote into the empty recliner beside the sofa.

She grabbed her husband’s shirt and pulled him into him as she crashed her lips against his in a hungry kiss.

Jack laid on top of his wife and let his hands roam her body.

Ryleigh broke the kiss and pushed her husband off of her.

“Are you ok?” He asked, concerned that he upset her.

“As much as I’m enjoying this, I really don’t want to do anything on the sofa.” She replied and Jack nodded as they both stood up.

Jack picked Ryleigh up bridal style and carried her to the guest room on the ground floor.

Ryleigh giggled as he playfully dropped her on the bed.

“You dork.” Ryleigh said.

Jack smirked as he removed his shirt and climbed over her.

He captured her lips in a sweet and tender kiss before moving on and kissing her neck.

“Stop for a second.” Ryleigh said as she started sitting up.

Jack got off of her and laid beside her on the bed.

“What’s wrong?” Jack asked as Ryleigh looked at him.

“Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, Penetration still isn’t that much of an option.” Ryleigh questioned.

Jack smiled and pulled her down so that she was on top of him.

“There are other ways of having sex you know.” He answered.

“Yeah, but I don’t want to use anything that you order online the day PJ was born.” Ryleigh whined.

“Do you trust me?” Jack asked.

Ryleigh nodded slowly, not really knowing what he had up his sleeve.

“Good. Lay down and let me take care of you.” He instructed but Ryleigh shook her head.

“I like the view from up-” She started, before Jack flipped them so that he was on top again.

Ryleigh pouted at him and he chuckled.

“I have an idea, please let me go on top.” She begged and Jack rolled his eyes playfully.

Jack climbed off of her and removed his pants and returned to the bed, laying on his back as per Ryleigh’s request.

The woman finished undressing herself before climbing over her husband.

“What are you doing? I thought you said that penetration was still prohibited.” He said with confusion.

“You’re not the only one whose been doing research you doofus. Now shut up and let me do this.” Ryleigh replied with a smirk and slightly raised brow.

“Kinky bitch.” Jack mumbled as Ryleigh placed her lips on his softly.

The woman slowly grinded against him, making sure that he didn’t slip inside her.

Ryleigh broke the kiss and moved away long enough for her to move his erection against his stomach.

“Tell me if I hurt you.” Ryleigh said as she carefully lowered her dripping core onto his cock.

Jack hissed, making Ryleigh lift her hips away from him.

“I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” Ryleigh asked with concern. Jack shook his head.

“No, it felt good.” He replied and Ryleigh smiled.

She lowered herself back down after resting his back on his lower belly.

Ryleigh continued to slide herself against her husband, drawing a symphony of moans from his lips.

“I’m gonna cum.” Jack whispered as his eyes fluttered closed.

Ryleigh stopped and ran her fingers against his frenulum. The sensation made the man under her squirm in delight.

“You like that?” Ryleigh asked with amusement.

Jack nodded and hummed in contentment.

“Keep going.” He whispered just as soft as before.

Ryleigh listened to his request and moved her hips as she continued to massage the area.

Jack’s labored breathing soon turned into slight grunts as the knot in his belly tightened.

Before he could warn her, his orgasm washed over him and he spilled all over himself. Ryleigh watched with a smile as his body writhed and shuddered underneath her.

“You’re pretty.” Ryleigh teased as Jack came down from his high.

Jack chuckled and with all the strength he could muster, he flipped them over so that Ryleigh was beneath him.

“Your turn.” Jack said as he winked and went down on the woman.

=

After their fun, Jack and Ryleigh got dressed again and went around to make sure the house was locked.

When they were satisfied with everything, they went upstairs, had a shower where they fucked again and then crawled into bed, after deciding that clothes weren’t necessary.

=

The next morning, Grace woke up cuddled into George’s side. Her head was resting on his bare chest.

The smile on her face grew even bigger as the events from the previous night replayed in the woman’s head.

“What are you smiling at?” George asked groggily.

“Last night.” Grace replied simply.

George’s own smile grew and he started chuckling.

“It was fun, wasn’t it.” He said as his chuckles died down.

Grace nodded and smirked.

“Round 6?” Grace asked.

=

Back at the Lake house, Anna had escaped the confines of her crib again and crept into her parent’s room and tiptoed to her father’s side of the bed.

Jack was laying on his side facing Anna. Ryleigh’s arm was slung over his waist while her forehead was resting his bare back.

The little girl didn’t bother to say anything as she knew her father wouldn’t hear her. Instead, she threw her ducky in his face. Thankfully it missed his face and hit him in the chest.

“Hey.” Jack grumbled as his eyes remained closed.

Anna picked ducky up off the floor and threw him at Jack again, this time ducky hit him square in the face. Jack caught ducky this time and held him close

“You are a cheeky one.” He said as he opened his eyes and blinked rapidly as he tried to adjust to the light.

When he could see better, he grabbed his glasses and put them on and he was met with a wild haired Anna.

“Hi dada.” She greeted softly, knowing that her mother was still sleeping.

“Hi princess.” Jack replied, matching her tone.

“I eat?” Anna asked as Jack handed ducky back to her.

“You go wait at the stairs for me.” He whispered, not wanting her to see him and Ryleigh weren’t wearing clothes and that he was semi hard.

Jack crawled out of bed slowly, not wanting to wake his wife. He quickly grabbed his sweatpants and pulled them on while trying to think of something gross and disgusting, hoping it would help and thankfully it did.

Jack walked to where his daughter was randomly jumping up and down.

“What are you doing?” Jack asked with amusement.

Anna giggled and stopped jumping, lifting her arms up so that her father would pick her up.

“It’s friday isn’t it?” Jack asked, cluing into her excitement.

“Yeah. Cake!” She hollered at him with a wide cheesy smile.

“Yes.” Jack said as he set her down in her little booster seat.

Anna patted the table top with both of her hands as she waited for her father to bring her a bowl of fruit like she normally got for breakfast.

Instead of filling her sippy cup with water, Jack decided to surprise her with chocolate milk.

“Tata.” Anna said as Jack placed her food in front of her.

“You’re welcome, my heart.” He replied before kissing the top of her head.

Jack sat at the table as well and had his cup of coffee.

“So, you met Mi’s boyfriend?” Jack asked as he read his paper.

“Him nice.” Anna said as she chewed her banana.

“What’s his name?” Jack asked in a teasing tone.

Anna ignored that question and picked up her cup to take a drink.

When the chocolate milk hit her tongue, Anna squealed happily.

“Why is she squealing?” Ryleigh asked as she walked downstairs with Parker in her baby carrier.

“Tell mama what you got.” Jack said encouragingly.

Anna put her cup down and smiled.

“Brown milk.” Anna hollered.

Ryleigh laughed and went to make herself some food.

“You want me to take the peanut?” Jack asked as he walked into the kitchen.

“Sure. Thank you babe.” Ryleigh said as she helped her husband take the baby out of the wrap.

The father held his youngest close and as he sat at the table, his phone rang.

“Hello?” He asked as he put the phone on speaker.

“It’s Lauren. Has Dakota called you yet?” Lauren replied.

“Tee.” Anna shrieked when she heard it was Lauren.

In recent times, Anna and Joshua had come to call Lauren their auntie. Of course with them being young, they couldn’t quite pronounce ‘auntie’, so they just called her ‘Tee.’

“Hi my sweet Annie.” The woman said before continuing to talk to her friend.

“RYLEIGH!” Jack called excitedly, making both of his girls cry.

Ryleigh came running into the dinning room.

“What’s wr- really?” SHe whined when she heard both her girls upset.

“I know, I’m sorry. Dakota’s water finally broke and they’ve been in hospital for the last three hours.” He explained.

“Thank fuck for that.” Ryleigh said.

Anna stopped crying and looked at her mother who had a hand clapped over her mouth.

“Mama, no. Dat bad.” Anna lectured, despite her tears.

“That’s right.” Jack agreed.

“Dada, her sad.” Anna pointed out as she looked at her little sister.

“Thank you, missy obvious.” Jack said sassily, making Anna giggle.

“Elcome.” She replied, still not able to say ‘welcome’ properly.

“Do you know what’s happening right now?” Ryleigh asked as she sat at the table, forgetting all about her coffee that sat on the kitchen counter.

Anna shook her head.

“You’re getting a new cousin today.” Ryleigh replied, pulling an over excited face.

Anna’s face lit up with joy.

“Wanna see.” Anna said as she pushed her bowl away and wriggled in her seat.

“The baby isn’t here yet but when she is, uncle Chase will call us and tell us when we can meet her.” Jack explained and Anna pouted.

“Otay.” Anna said happily but still thrashed in her chair.

“Where do you want to go?” Ryleigh asked as she released Anna from her confines.

“Dress.” She shouted excitedly.

Jack and Ryleigh laughed.

“Alright, let’s go.” The mother replied as she held out her hand for the tot.

“No, dada.” Anna said as she swung her hand behind her back.

Jack stood up and handed Parker over to her mother once again before he and Anna went upstairs to get her changed.

=

The father went through so many outfits until his daughter was satisfied.

“Are you serious, you really want to wear that?” Jack asked when he looked at Anna’s outfit.

“I pretty.” Anna said as she twirled for her father.

“You sure are and if wearing this dress makes you happy then wear it with pride.” Jack said as she stopped spinning and giggled.

“Baby turn.” Anna said as she heard heer mother walking toward the room they were currently in.

“Look at you, you look so beautiful.” Ryleigh commented when she saw Anna in her Minnie Mouse dress from James and Ruth.

Anna did an overdramatic spin for her mother.

“I think auntie will love the fact that you wanted to dress up to meet your cousin.” Jack said as he rubbed at his eyes from behind his glasses.

“Why don’t you and dada go pick out shoes to wear when it’s time to go.” Ryleigh suggested, so that she could change the baby without Anna wanting to get in there and poke and prod at Parker.

“We already talked about what shoes to wear but maybe you can come help me pick a shirt to wear.” Jack replied.

“Otay.” Anna replied as she took her father’s hand and led him to his and Ryleigh’s room.

Once they reached the room, Jack picked Anna up and placed her on his side of the bed, propping her up so that she could see the shirts he tried on.

“Ok, you ready?” Jack asked as he pulled the first shirt on.

“Yup.” Anna called as she patted her bare legs.

Jack walked out of the closet and modeled the shirt for his daughter, making sure to slowly turn so that she could see the whole thing.

“No, not good.” Anna answered truthfully not liking the colour.

“Alrighty.” The father responded as he walked back into the closet.

He skimmed through his shirts and he came across a simple black shirt. He pulled it off the hanger and put it on.

As soon as he stepped out of the little space, Anna nodded.

“Pretty.” She said as a smile grew on her lips.

“You’re supposed to say handsome, not pretty.” Ryleigh said as she entered the room.

“No, dada pretty.” Anna said seriously.

Ryleigh shook her head as she chuckled.

“Let’s go downstairs so that dada can shower and I can do your hair.” Ryleigh said. Anna nodded and stood up on the bed.

Jack moved closer to the bed and Anna jumped into his arms. The man laughed as he caught her and held her close.

“Love you dada.” Anna shouted as she kissed him and threw her arms around his neck in a big hug.

“I love you too, princess.” Jack replied as he set the little girl down so that she could run to the stairs like she always did.

When the girl was out of earshot, Ryleigh walked up to Jack.

“You look really hot with those glasses on.” Ryleigh whispered as she placed her lips over his in a hot kiss.

Ryleigh backed away from the kiss when she felt her husband’s erection pressing into her core.

“You’re evil.” He growled when he opened his eyes.

“Enjoy your shower, big boy.” She teased softly before walking out of the room.

Jack grumbled and angrily removed his shirt. He then stormed into the bathroom where he showered and took care of himself.

=

By the time that Jack had finished his shower and got dressed, Chase had called Ryleigh to let her know that the baby had been born and that mom and baby were doing well. He also told her that when they were ready, they could come and meet the baby.

“Jack, Chase just called.” Ryleigh called from the living room where Parker slept in her rocker and Anna played with her toys.

“What did he say?” He asked as he came downstairs and walked over to them.

“You officially have a niece.” Ryleigh replied with a huge smile.

“Are you all ready to go?” Jack asked excitedly. Ryleigh laughed.

“I sure am. You get the baby and I’ll help Annie with her shoes.” Ryleigh said as she helped Anna clean up her toys.

“White Minnie Mouse sandals.” Jack said as he picked Parker up.

The mother nodded and stood up, following her daughter over to where they kept the shoes.

Jack and Ryleigh got their girls all ready to go and they headed over to the hospital.

=

“It’s weird saying that we have a daughter.” Dakota said as she watched Chase pace the room with the newborn in his arms.

“It really is weird but it’s nice at the same time. Changing the diapers will be easier.” She replied.

Before either of them could say anything else, someone knocked on the door.

“Come in.” Chase said as he adjusted the newborn in his arms.

Grace opened the door and walked in.

“Hello my darlings.” She greeted softly.

“Hi.” Dakota replied through a bright smile.

“How are you feeling?” Grace asked as she sat beside Dakota’s bed.

“Exhausted but so happy.” She answered.

“How are you feeling Chase?” The woman asked, seeing him staring lovingly at his daughter.

“Over the moon. I have two beautiful women in my life and one strapping man.” He stated proudly. Both women chuckled.

At that moment, there was another knock on the door.

“Hello.” Dakota said, granting permission to enter the room.

Jack helped Anna push the door open as Ryleigh stood behind them holding the carseat that held an alert Parker.

“Hi Dee.” Anna greeted as she walked toward her auntie.

“Hello my sweet girl, look at you. You’re so pretty.” Dakota commented.

Anna did a little spin for her and she giggled.

“Very pretty indeed.” Chase added as he smiled warmly.

“Tata.” The tot said.

“She insisted on wearing this.” Jack admitted.

“Now that you’re all here, I think it’s time for this little lady to get passed around.” Chase said as he looked at his wife for approval.

“We talked about it and Chase and I agree that Anna should be the first one to hold the baby.” Dakota explained.

Anna beamed at the adults and jumped excitedly in her spot next to her father.

“Come here sweet pea.” Chase said as he sat down with the baby.

Anna toddled over to her uncle and climbed onto the small couch with her father’s help. Jack got her situated and when he was sure the little girl was comfortable, he stepped away.

Chase handed the newborn to his niece and Anna giggled as the baby blinked up at her.

“Her cute.” Anna said as she looked at her little cousin.

“Do you want to know what her name is?” Chase asked, unaware that Grace and Jack were taking photos of the pair.

“Peas.” Anna said. Chase whispered the name into her ear.

“What’s her name?” Ryleigh asked.

“You tell.” Anna said as she looked at her uncle.

“Katherine Ivy.” He announced happily.

Tag List: @sarahegerton96​ @softeggsy​ @dogmom2014​ @holdmeclosertinytaron​ @aberystwythboy​ @jobanan23​ @stronglyobsessed​ @superthiccthighssavelives​ @hauntedflamingo​ @rocknrollmadden​

#Sunsets&WhiskeyKisses #taronegerton #Richard Madden

[ill-skillsgard]

Sweet Words - Bill Skarsgård

Title: Sweet Words

Description: Life is crashing down around you but he is always there to feed you sweet words.

Warning: 18+ for mental health struggles/fluffy smut/swearing

A/N: This is a super special and rare lil request fill for @bride-of-freddy-krueger because she was my very first mutual and I love her. You are wonderful and deserve everything, darling <3 Kisses!

The house was a disaster and you could have spent your time cleaning it but you were far too busy feeling sorry for yourself. Every time you lifted a limb to drag yourself off the couch, you gave up, claiming internally that there was no point in cleaning—No point in doing anything productive. Everything was going to just go back to the way it was anyway, so why bother? You had lost your job. Whatever, there were jobs everywhere. You were doing terribly in school. It's fine, you could try harder. Your mental health felt like it was chipping away piece by piece. No matter, you could go see a shrink and get yourself patched up eventually. But right now, as you laid limply on the couch, you groaned in misery. What if you never came out of this? What if you were doomed to fail no matter how hard you tried? What then? Would a clean house really help clear your head enough? Probably not, you decided. Surging emotions bubbled to the surface all at once and exited your body in the form of scalding tears that stung your eyes and plugged up your nose so you had to breathe through your mouth while sobbing. You pressed your face into the cushions and let loose. All the negative feelings you had been experiencing stumbled over each other, rushing to leave your throat at the same time. Was this your wavering mental state making its dramatic appearance? Was this hormones? You couldn't tell what was real and wasn't anymore. Was this true despair? It must have been because you had never felt so helpless in your life. "Um, are you okay?" A voice asked. You lifted your face from the couch cushion, leaving behind tear stains to look up, red-faced and sniffling at Bill who had just let himself in. Through all your crying you hadn't heard him coming in. He stared at you with his eyes glazing over. It looked as though he were going to begin crying as well. From behind his back he produced a small cellophane wrapped bouquet of bright white and yellow daisies. You gasped when you saw them and sat up, using the backs of your palms to swipe away the wetness from your cheeks. "Oh my god," you murmured. "Babe? What are you doing? Why are you crying?" The question alone was enough to bring forth another spring of tears and he went to you on the couch, passed you the bouquet and sat beside you with his arm thrown over your shoulders. "I'm sorry," you began. "I just... I feel so useless and stupid. This shit inside of my head... I'm just afraid. Fuck—" "What are you afraid of?" He asked. You laid your head on his shoulder and tried to breathe his scent through your stuffy nose. Suddenly you felt embarrassed that he had caught you in the middle of an emotional fit. "I'm afraid that I'm a fucking failure." "But you're not a failure." "Yes, I am." Bill angled himself closer to you and ran his hands up your neck and through the strands of hair behind your ears. "Have you given up?" "What?" "Have you given up on everything? Are you going to stay on the couch for the rest of your life crying?" "N-no," you stammered. "You're going to cry it out and get back up?" "I want to." "Then you're not a failure." "But... Everything I've worked hard for has just exploded in my face." "Yes," Bill agreed, drilling you with his eyes. "That happens. That's life, honey. And I know that you're battling some shit inside of you but... If you haven't given up yet, then you're not a failure. So don't talk like that." "I can't help it. I can't control my emotions. I feel like I've lost control of everything." Bill kissed you hard despite how moist your cheeks were. He didn't care. He had had enough of hearing you rip yourself apart. "That happens too, you know. You're only human. Sometimes we try so hard and even if we give it the best we have it ends up not working out. But I know you're stronger than this. You're just having a moment of weakness. You'll get through this. I'll make sure of it." His mouth was close enough to yours that you could feel the air of his words and taste his breath. You kissed him again and he welcomed it. With his two large hands framing your face, he got comfortable and allowed you to melt against him. Without glancing away, he took the flowers from your lap and set them down on the table. "You're the sweetest girl I know and you're stronger than this," he whispered. "I love you." The honeyed words dripping from his lips elicited another choked sob from you but for different reasons. How was it that this one man could speak a few sentences and make you forget all about the trash pile you had found yourself in?  And it wasn't that he promised you the world or spewed fake praises. Everything that he told you made perfect sense. You almost hated how sensible Bill could be sometimes. He gathered you up and pulled you onto his lap so he could run his hands all up and down your back, shoulders and neck. "I said I love you," he reminded you, eyes still closed while his lips pressed against your cheek. "I love you, too," you giggled. "There's my sweet girl. It's good to hear you laugh. That's what keeps me going, you know that? Seeing you happy... Shit, that's my raison d'être." "Oh, stop," you playfully hit him. He grabbed your wrist, his eyes suddenly darkening. You knew that look. That was how he looked at you when dirty thoughts began swirling around in his head. "You know what else helps regulate hormones and emotions?" He asked you. You shook your head no, silently urging him to continue. "Sex." "Oh, really?" "Mm-hmm," he smirked. "Lots of it." Without a chance to reply, Bill flipped you over onto your back and kissed you again. His lips felt soft and wet and his hand began to wander down from your neck to your collarbone then further down to your chest. He scooped up a handful of your breast and gave it a gentle squeeze, tittering when you moaned against his mouth. Bill lifted your shirt and pressed feathery kisses to your tummy, inching himself down on the couch until he couldn't go much further. His hands, entwined with yours, let go just for the purpose of undoing the button of your jeans. He worked your pants down with a little help from you and when they were off, he sat back on his haunches and pulled off his own shirt while you did the same. He had you naked quickly and smiled devilishly while he took off his own pants. But before he entered you, he had to pepper the rest of your body with kisses and he never stopped looking up at you. Though you were certain the angle was unflattering, you could not rip your stare away from him. He had full command of you and your body. Spreading your legs, he bit his lip and smiled when he saw the enticing wetness between your legs. Dipping his head low, he gave you one long, slow lick and moaned against your clit until your spine lifted off the couch. "Oh, so sweet," Bill laughed softly. He gave himself a few strokes, made sure you were watching him touch himself and tapped the head of his cock against your clit a couple of times before pushing inside slowly and with the most salacious moan you had ever heard leave him. As soon as he was fully enveloped, his muscles turned to mush and he laid on top of you so he could kiss you and rock his hips into you a few times. "Feels so good, honey. God, I love this." You nodded your head and gave him a smile that made him smile right back at you. Circling your waist with his arms, he pulled you up so you were sitting on his lap. His expression was lax with pleasure and he guided your hips back and forth, around and around and up and down. "That's right, sweetheart. Fuck me good. Feels better already, doesn't it?" You clung to him tightly in hopes that he would take back the control. You needed his guidance. You wanted him to tell you what to do. So far, he was the only thing standing between you and complete mental destruction. But you knew he was solid. Bill wasn't going anywhere. He would be that barrier between yourself and your detrimental thoughts. He always was and all at once, you felt silly that you had thought yourself so beyond help just moments ago. Bill tossed you back on the couch, on your stomach and lifted your hips so he could push himself inside of you from behind. You could tell he was getting close because his motion became erratic and he kept muttering, "fuck... Fuck me, that's good. Oh, fuck. Oh, god." He pulled out just in time to coat your ass with cum which he was quick to mop up with his nice shirt. But he was far from done with you, as he indicated by turning you around and diving back down between your legs. "You gonna give me all that sweet cum?" He asked. "Yes," you whispered. "That's my good, sweet girl. I need it all, okay?" You giggled and turned pink. "Okay." "Promise me you'll cum real good all over my face?" "I promise." He kissed your thigh and smiled. "Thank you, sweetheart."

#bill skarsgård fanfiction #bill skarsgard fanfiction #bill skarsgård smut #bill skarsgard smut #fanfiction #bill skarsgård fluff #bill skarsgard fluff

[freerebelmentality]

Long way from home

Word Count: 2,274

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You attend your first SAMCRO party at the clubhouse where Herman has transferred from Tacoma. He leads you in, hand in hand and as soon as you enter the bar area is when you spotted all the crow eaters. Along with the porn stars, they look way more prettier than you even though if its pounds of make up and limited to no clothing options.

“We are a long way from home. Well I am” You say while looking around and stopping in your tracks.

Herman looks behind him and doesnt see you at his side. He looks to where you have stopped and came walking towards you.

“Whats wrong?” He asks looking to you

“Nothing” You snap yourself away from looking at the woman practically advertising their goods.

He pulls you to his side, his arm is wrapped around your neck as he kissed the side of your head and leads you to the other members of the club.

“Guys, I want to introduce you guys to my old lady y/n” Herman introduces you to some of the guys.

“Good god you are incredibly gorgeous. Why are you with this asshole?” The man with the intense blue eyes asks.

“You must be Tig” You say while letting out a slight chuckle and squeeze Hermans hand for reassurance.

“Oh you have heard about me” He says as he shakes your hand

“Only the better things” You reply sarcastically. He smiles and toasts his drink to you. He walks away from the crowd and gets his favourite crow eater.

“Happy, Juice, Bobby, Chucky, Opie, Piney, prospect Miles and Chibs” Herman introduces you while they give a little wave and smile.

“Chibs, Scottish right?” You ask looking to him

“Aye, you familiar with Scotland?” He asks leaning on the bar.

“Yeah, spent some time there while I was younger with my parents” You tell him while he gives you an interested expression

“What part of Scotland?” He asks in complete curiosity. Herman is loving the way the guys are making you feel right at home and you are getting along with his brothers.

“Glasgow, my dad was the Uni’s professor” You tell him while he is clearly impressed with your dads profession.

“How about you? What part of Scotland you from?” You ask while taking a beer from Hermans hand

“Lanarkshire but moved to Ireland later” He replies and looks to the door. He sees Clay, Gemma, Jax and Tara come into the club.

Clay and Jax go to Herman and give him a hug. While Gemma does the same and gives him a peck to the cheek. Tara gives him a side hug.

“Clay, Jax, Gemma, Tara. I want you to meet my old lady y/n” He introduces you to them.

You shake the hand of Clay as he leans in to give you a peck to the cheek while Jax does the same thing. Tara shakes your hand while Gemma smiles and pulls you in for a hug along with a peck as well.

“Nice to meet you sweet heart” Gemma says making you feel welcome to the new family

“You come here with Kozik from Tacoma too? Or did you wait until he got settled?” Tara asks out of curiosity

“No, I waited. I wanted to finish out the year of work before I came here. So I let him come here and get settled with the house and everything” You tell her while sitting with Gemma and Tara at a table across from where the guys are sitting at the bar.

“What type of job did you have?” Gemma asks looking to you.

“Elementary school teacher. Grade fives and sixes” You reply while Herman smiles because he is pretty proud he is a good woman on his side

“Wow, how did you meet Kozik?” Tara asks

“Uh, um” You try to remember the place you met Herman but drawing a blank. You look to Herman right away and he couldnt believe you forgot

“The grocery store” He reminds you while the memory finally comes to mind

“Right the place with all the food and crap” You say while the others get a good chuckle

“Kozie, ye have a good woman” Chibs says as he claps his back

Some blonde begins to eye Herman from across the room, tall, long legs, pretty and long hair that came down her back. You dont like how she is looking at him. You look to Herman and he doesnt notice a thing at all. You continue talking with Gemma and Tara getting to know each other. You get up from you chair and walk to the bar to get more drinks.

“What is a guy like that doing with a scab like you?” The blonde asks as soon as she gets in front of your face and spills the drinks you had in your hands on you.

“You fucking dirty whore” You say while wiping the beer from your face and neck

Herman, Jax and Opie get up quickly but you wave them off while they sit back down. Well except for Herman, he remains standing. She walks away and out of the club.

“What the fuck is her problem?” You ask while keeping your eyes on the door in hopes that she will come back inside.

“She sees what she cant have and thinks she is entitled to whatever she pleases” Tara says while looking to you and telling you how she is because she knows all to well.

“You need to” Gemma is about to give some advice

“Show that fucking cunt he isnt free fucking dick, I know. Piss me right the fuck off” You cut off Gemma and repeat the other old ladies words of advice back in Tacoma.

Over the next couple weeks have gone by with ease, you got hired at the school as a teacher assistant for now and waited until you can get a full time position. You didnt mind about the wait, just as long as you were working and being busy throughout the day then it was just perfect.

“Hey babe” Herman says once you enter the house from work

“I am really happy to see you” You tell him and give him a kiss to the lips. Every time you would kiss him after a days of hard work is when you just melted. It was like as if the stress of the day just melted away after each and every kiss.

“Party at the club tonight, wanna go?” He asks as he slowly pulls away from you.

“Sure, I could use this as an excuse to get drunk” You tell him as you smile to him

You begin to get ready for the party, you wore dark denim skinny jeans, your favourite top that showed the right curves and booties to complete your outfit.

“Of course porn whores are here” You say as you get off the bike

“Dont worry about them, Im here with you and your here with me” Herman says and places his hand in yours as he leads the both of you inside.

As the night went on you were having a good time, had fun talking with Chibs and Tara. Juice joined in on the conversation while Herman was out side with Clay and Bobby. You head out to join in on hanging out with your man.

Until you saw Ima flirting with Herman, him trying to get her off of him and walking away from her. Juice telling her to back off, Bobby doing the same until he saw you. He stops from doing anything, Herman turns as well and he comes to you.

“Thats fucking it” Is all you say while walking past Herman and him trying to stop you but you push away.

“Stay the fuck away from my BOYFRIEND!!” You growl stating that Herman is yours while shoving her to the ground.

Everyone around stops what they were doing and look to you and see what is going on. You help her on her feet, she slaps you and you step away while holding your face. Its stings but its enough to get you pissed.

“Thats for trying to get with MY OLD MAN” You pull yourself together as you grab her and spun her to make her face you while back handing her hard to the face.

“Thats for flirting with him right in front of ME” You slap her once more as she falls to the ground and you pull her on her feet again.

“Thats for, I dont know. I just felt like doing that. Stupid whore” You punch her square in the face

“You dont deserve any better, what you work as is all that you deserve and thats it” You tell her as she lays on the ground

You walk past Herman and went into the clubhouse. You walked past the people in the bar area and went to the bathroom.

“Getting tired of this shit” You mutter to yourself as you try to calm yourself down.

Someone knocks on the door and you open it slightly and see Herman standing on the other side. You let him in.

“Are you alright?” He asks as he takes your hand in his and making sure that nothing was broken

“No, Im far from alright. Im getting tired of proving your mine and getting my point to the others. Im tired of this shit Herman” You tell him while trying to contain the sob that wants to escape your mouth.

“What are you saying?” He asks in complete fear that you are going to leave him for good. He fears he is going to pick up the pieces when you’ll leave him

“Im saying your sleeping on the couch” You tell him as you walk out of the bathroom, across the bar and out the door.

“Take me home?” You ask Juice as he nods and starts his bike. He tosses you his helmet and drives out of the lot.

He stops in your drive way, you get off and take the helmet off to hand it back to Juice.

“Want me to stay?” He asks raising his voice so he can be heard over his bike

“No, I’ll be fine. Go back and keep an eye on him for me” You tell him as he gives you a nod. He backs out of the drive way and head back to the club house.

You walk up to the front door, dig around your purse in search for the keys and finally take them out to unlock the door. You turn on the lights, walk into the living room and look around at the many pictures of the both of you looking incredibly happy. You pulled out the photo albums that contained more pictures of the both of you.

You hear a bike pulling into the drive way and goes off.

You are sitting on the floor in the living room, flipping through the pages of the photo album and remembering all the great times. Herman walks in and sees his old lady on the floor. He has a smile on his face as he watches you look through the pictures.

“That one is my favourite. That was the night when you agreed to be my old lady and that was the happiest day of my life” Herman breaks the silence, you look up from the picture with tears forming.

“Im sorry” You say while breaking down and couldnt control the sobs. Herman rushes to your side and pulls you into his arms.

“No babe. You have every right. Just like Tacoma, you did what you needed to do” He says as he kisses the side of your head.

“Honestly that turned me right on” He says as he chuckles

“You would be” You pull away from him and wipe away the tears as you smile

“And just like Tacoma. I would never leave you for anyone else, I would never do anything to hurt you in any way. I am all yours and yours only. I love you” He says as he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I love you too. I guess I just got tired of proving something to the other women that you are mine and they cant have you. I just had to reassure myself that this isnt Tacoma and I got to get used of it all over again. Im sorry for leaving like that” You tell him as your foreheads are touching and your hands are wrapped around his neck.

“Its fine really, you really scared me when you said you were getting tired of this shit. I thought you were going to leave me” He says in a hushed tone

“Honestly, thats what I was thinking of doing but looking at all the memories we have together. I couldnt and cant” You tell him looking to his eyes that are beginning to form tears.

“I am so happy you didnt. I love you so much” He says as he kisses you.

It finally hit you. You couldnt leave the man you come to love, couldnt break his heart and couldnt hurt his feelings all because you got tired of crow eaters trying to take your place. You knew that they didnt stand a chance with him because he wouldnt touch any of them because he is loyal to you. And you are loyal to him. You made a promise that day when you agreed to be his old lady and you werent going to break that promise. Not now. Not ever.

#herman kozik #kozik x reader #herman kozik x reader #sons of anarchy #soa #fanfiction #sons of anarchy fic #soa fic #chibs #happy #juice #tig #of course tig #bobby #clay morrow #gemma teller morrow #tara knowels #opie winston #piney winston #chucky #prospect miles #jax teller #jax x tara